A friend of mine found this and sent it to me (I AM NOT THE ORIGINAL AUTHOR AND I DO NOT KNOW THE SOURCE). I normally don’t believe in this stuff, but it seems to be real true though. The personality described below inside this post is very similar to that of myself:
If you’re in love with a Scorpio male and the word passion frightens you, put on your track shoes and run as if King Kong were pursuing you. He is. Don’t look back. Just run…
It’s pretty certain he hasn’t made a neutral impression on you. He’s either got you thinking he’s boyish and sweet, or that he’s wicked and passionate. The trouble is, he’s neither. Or maybe I should say he’s both. Well, this isn’t getting us anywhere. Let’s start all over again.
In one word, this man is invincible.
Hell bewilder you with his twin Scorpio traits of passion and reason. He’s master of both: intellect and emotions rule him equally. Scorpio is more than intelligent. If he’s a highly evolved specimen, he’s also deeply philosophical, concerned with mysteries of existence, and he’ll come close to knowing the answers.
Normally, Scorpio will surround himself with luxury. He’s geared for love, with confidence. Romance will never frighten him.
He not only enjoys winning, he has to win. Yet he normally practices good sportsmanship. Like all his other emotions, disappointment never shows on those set features, and his reactions are rigidly controlled, including his romantic intentions. It’s merely the Scorpio desire to keep dignity at all cost; he won’t stand for ridicule or cheapness.
Every Scorpio is a law unto himself, and completely unconcerned with what others think of him. He would like to be respected as a good, solid citizen, but if it interferes with his goals, then he couldn’t care less, and those who gossip can just go to hell. None of his important decisions are hampered by the opinions of his friends, relatives, neighbors or enemies. Don’t run away yet. Such beautiful self-containment and sureness of purpose can create a mighty attractive, free spirit who’s not always fussing about what people think.
It’s quite an experience to see the Scorpio man operate under adversity’s black clouds. While others are mumbling and crumbling and grumbling, he is at his forceful, courageous best. He seldom wallows in envy or self-pity, and he doesn’t happen to think that life owes him a single farthing. You can just imagine how much time that saves. Instead of pouting in hurt anger when real troubles hit, he meets them head on. Conquer them? But of course.
That’s what he was born to do.
He has high standards, and he won’t choose his friends loosely. They’ll have to measure up. This is a marvelous, rare kind of man who can share a jug of spirits and joke with rough humor among other men; then tap that deep, inscrutable nature and turn into as gentle and tender lover (with women of course). If there’s anything more to ask for in a male animal, I don’t know what it might be.
He can be cruel sometimes, in front of friends. Later, when you’re alone, he’ll tell you what he really thinks.
It may take a while to adjust to his personality, but it will eventually toughen you up. If you’re too soft, you’ll bruise easily with a Scorpio. Never ask him what he thinks of a new dress or hair-do, unless you’re prepared to be stung by the brutal truth. At least you’ll know his positive statements are honest, and not pasted together with the sticky glue of bored, insincere flattery. It’s better to brave a good, healthy “You look awful,” now and then, and be rewarded by an occasional “You’re really beautiful, you know,” than to swallow a constant diet of vague remarks like: “Yes, dear, it’s lovely, sugar. Mmmmm-just fine, pigeon,” from other men. Don’t you think so?
Women will find him irresistibly attractive, but keep remembering that if anyone is strong enough to resist such continual flattery and temptation, it’s a Scorpio. Doesn’t that make you feel better? It should. It’s true.
He’ll probably be a stern father. The children won’t get away with an ounce of lazy or frivolous behavior. He’ll teach them to respect property, but he’ll also teach them to respect themselves. Youngsters will seldom get the chance to form any false values around a Scorpio papa. Although he’ll love them with as much sincere passion as he puts into everything else he cares about, he won’t stand for any nonsense. He’ll protect them when they need it, but they’ll soon get the message that he expects them to stand alone. If they borrow money from him, he’s liable to charge them interest on it, but it’s for their own good. Often his offspring will find him gentle and funny; still there won’t be any question about who is boss. He’ll joke and laugh with them, and give them a sense of freedom, but the chalk line will be drawn, and they’ll know not to cross it.
A Scorpio man will never allow a woman to dictate to him. He is the man and you are the woman, and if you have any doubts about it, you will be set straight so surely that you’ll never need but one lesson. Yet, a Scorpio husband with a wife who truly understands him, will be tender, sympathetic, considerate, and repay her loyalty with the kind of love most women only read about and wish for.
Let the cool chase you... 
A Scorpio man will never allow a woman to dictate to him. Never in a million years. He is the man and you are the woman, and if you have any doubts about it, you will be set straight so surely that you’ll never need but one lesson.
__________________________________________
You know, domestic drama shit, all the additude
I’d never hit a girl, but I’ll shake the shit out of you
-kanye west haha
no objections here…
I totally agree, with everything Im so misunderstood but the writer of that definitely knows what they are talking about. Great blog will check you out from time to time.
Peace
The Naimhotep
T shot…thanks for commenting.
Naimhotep?
explain
You have basically written my husband’s biography. Im married to a Scorpio and you couldn’t be more accurate if you had birthed him yourself..lol.
my bday too
hi i had a boyfriend scorpio he’s same and the rules about ‘the man in charge’ are so right also his personality. well it just fit’s so well on him ,that i can not belive it…
i wish i wasnt capricorn ,maybe it would work,they say it should ,but we are both very strong in ideas..
I just want to say that I like the descripcion above I’m scorpion from November 8. but keep this in mind even that sometimes we do not listen to others, we do care about everybody and we are good people my brother and mother are also scorpion so I know about this. lol. take care you all!
hey! Good read but dude.. Its copied in verbatim from the very famous ‘linda goodman’s sunsigns’.
Sorry to burst the bubble though
Eh… Its a horoscope… ie BS
i am a scorpio oct 24
i agree with what is said.
i was astonished to read the text and it is so true. just wanted to say it;)
It would be really cool if you would actually ‘write’ something about scorpio male in here.
I am a Pisces, and had never met a Scorpio Man, nor did i invlove myself in the art of Astrology, that is until recently. I fell in love with a Scorpio Man over a distance of thousands of miles. His passion pierced my soul from that far away. Being that we are both sensual intuitive people, and also water signs, we are supposedly one of the more perfect matches of the Zodiac, HOWEVER, I being the sensitive fish that I am, I had NO IDEA what type of creature I was dealing with. I got stung several times emotionally and verbally before the relationship was over, and I still have NO IDEA to this day, what exactly happened. All I am SURE of, is that I said and did everything that absolutely must NOT be done or said with a Scorpio. I later found this near PERFECT description of my Scorpio Man, and from that point on I’ve been obsessed with the art of understanding people through Astrology. One word of caution Ladies, He runs HOT or COLD. Never both. If he is into you, he is TRULY into you, regardless of the hoards of other attractive women who are drawn to him. He may flirt, but that’s his job. He could care less about them. they are anciallary distractions. HOWEVER, don’t be fooled into thinking that HE believes the same thing about YOU. He doesn’t. He is the world greatest Hypocrite when it comes to Jealousy! Expect his, and quell yours. As long as you are faithful, and you let him have all the Passionate (not cold fish!!) Sex that he wants, then you should have a VERY devoted Man on your hands. Also.. very important, IF he appears to WANT to be in control of a situtation… then LET him!! Swallow your pride, is it really worth losing him over a silly disagreement? It wasnt for me, and I’ll NEVER get him back, no matter what I do or say. (remember, Hot or Cold, Off or ON.. simple)
Did you date a man named Matt from eharmony? sounds like him
I dated a Piscean Matt from EH who fits this description
I dated a Matt from Eharmony and this sounds exactly like him, too. Wonder if it’s the same Matt!!!
Wow!!!! I’m a Scorpio man and I honestly can not believe how accurate you were with your blog! I respect your honesty and and the reason it caught my attention was because I have a lot of pisces friends and they happen to be my best friends!! anyway hit me back, lmd4mbm@yahoo.com
Hey, maybe you can give me an insight on this situation I was having.
I am a college student and I was in class with this scorpio guy. He sat behind me; I never did talk to him I found him creepy Lol! he would always try to make conversation or talk to me I was very short though. Then one day I actually got into a conversation with him and all and what Ever he asked for my number I gave it to him and w.e. he would always be staring at me so I was curious. Well point is we started talking and while he would try to ask about me I always pushed him away constantly questioning his intentions. Me being a very distrustful person quite the skeptic here. Well he would get offended and be like okay I wont ask anymore. And I would ask why are you always touching me? his response the same fine I wont touch you anymore, and so on. Well he would always be asking to hang out and I would be like ehh I don’t know, and never say yes. So one day we got into this argument and to make it up I decided to see him so I did. He would ask me always to meet him at bar or ask me to chill at his spot I personally didn’t want to I thought he was up to something. Again I am very skeptical I do not believe in the good in people by words. Well we hung out at his placed kissed all that good stuff (not sex though) but well I had a great time. We continued to talk and we will have more argument all the time. Because I didn’t trust him and when he would be sweet I would question it. I guess most of the times I didn’t respond the way you would expect a girl to respond to sweet charms. Then I decided I didn’t want to be with him and well he convinced me to stay. So fine we got together again and we would talk often ( he would always be busy) to me BS and well, when he got together the second time we had sex and all it was my first time and he knew it. I would also get him little gifts and all I got him a fish because he loves fishing and I thought it was cute. When that happened he was all happy and all and that night he told me something that left me unease he said, “I think you have deep feelings for me” even though I did I denied them because personally I didn’t want to share my emotions and be vulnerable with someone when I didn’t even know where we were standing we weren’t in a relationship or nothing so I just kept it casual although he drove me crazy and I am a very hard female not many men can get me to be at a point like that. I was in-fact I am crazy about him, the look in his eyes when he looked at me ughh makes me cringe. He didn’t text me for two days after my first time having sex… I was so pissed Like WTF!!! seriously so when he did text me (me being a bitch because when you fuck with me you will get fire up your fucking ass) lol I was short with him then the next day he text me again and well I did talk to him and everything and I was cooling off. Then I saw his twitter I am kind off obsessive I guess, people would say I just check posts and tweet to see what you are lying to me about lol. and well he was being very flirty and I was like well dude you can’t fucking say you are busy if you have time to tweet shit. I didn’t tell him this but it pissed me the fuck off so I decided to end things and was very short. and then he comes with his cute, sexy and boyish laughter so damn SEXYYY!!!! I couldn’t resist so I decided not to and gave this other thing I had gotten him, thinking of the little things he had told me he likes doing and all. Here’s were it gets ugly… after we talked for and we were leaving he said I love you in a playful tone. I was like wtf! not in a happy way more of in a moody WTF are you saying way I care about him but I am not in love! and I asked him in that moment “what did you say?” and he said “I said love you” I was like” hahaha laughing and I said I wish” and walked off… we texted a few times and then he hadn’t replied to me for 2 days and when he did he told me this “look I don’t think I am the guy for you I feel like you have more feelings for me than I do and I don’t wanna push things any further. Your a cool girl but I just have priorities right now.” In a text I was like wtf me have more feeling I don’t even tell you anything and when you try to get close and hug me or show me affection I back off. So this left me confused lol. Then I replied by saying ” Me have more feelings for you okay… well have a good life I wont bother you ever again count on that one.” (I have too much pride to go begging or chase people!) then my cousin told me I fucked up and stuff and to call him and all so I did, and he didn’t answer so I told him in a text to pick up he said casually ” whats up? can’t talk on the phone right now” so I was like well ” I wanted to speak of this thing” and he said ” whattttt???? <—-( just like that lol) and he said if its about us I'm sorry but what I told you is how I feel and it's not going to change I'm sorry." I was like " I respect your decision I'm fine with that all I wanted was for us to not be like enemies because of this stupid situation, and I was feeling the same way but then I was confused on whether I should end it or not because I do care I'm not in love but I care." his response was " straight up I like you but I'm not feeling our situation right now and would like to stop it now. Thats all have a good night." my response was " Well okay at least I tried." I honestly see how my actions of pushing away and being kinda of standoffish can be a cause to our end and also how I didn't pay attention to what he was focused on like his baseball and stuff. But well I just want him back and fix things and start over so I want to know what you think about this…
Hi Michelle,
Sorry for the delay in writing. I am not a guy, so it is not possible for me to help you with “that mission”. Am not a fan of trying to get a guy back, while there is mistrust and aggression on your part.
Seems like there is alot of misunderstanding and confusion on your part. Which already tells me that your intentions do not help you clear this problem.
May I ask why you entered this “relationship” in the first place?
I Dont Know Why~ But I Keep Attracting Scorpians~ I Am A Gemini Woman And Have W/ My Scorpio For 4yrs~ Now Geminis And Scorpios Are The Least Compatible~ But This Has Been The Most Intense~ Fun~crazy Ride Of My Life~ They Say U Should Experience A Relationship W/ A Scorpio~ I Would Highly Recommend It~ But Just Know Its Not For The Faint Of Heart~
im currently dating a scorpio man and Im a scorpio myself, i just have to say that we are a match made in havean, i have been in love twice before but nothing compares to this relationship, i can finally trust a man now, he knows how to treat women, very responsible, loyal, passionate, a daydreamer,the only thing im worried about is that scorpio men are highly sexually driven, that scares me a bit.
Horoscopes are such bullshit. Who buys in to that crap?
“must have hit a nerve with ya, AJ”
I’m a Cancer woman dating a Scorpio man for the 1st time for the last several months and I can’t get over how magnetic we are to each other! It’s like a moth to a flame. He has started talking in future tense about the life we could have together someday, and at first I thought he was just trying to impress me, but I think he really sees us together in the long run.
I’m a little more cautious thinking, ‘yeah right, I’ve heard this before’ so I’m wondering how to handle it when he starts talking this way. I mean, I’m flattered and all but it kinda leaves me speechless when he does this.
Needless to say, we are a great match and when I’m not with him, he’s on my mind A LOT. He seems to like it when I call or text but I try not to go overboard. Am I on the right track?
don’t he done that too me my scorpio guy then just like that he drops a bomb am not ready and needs space time to do oter things never never marry a scorpio you will get hurt
if it was me doing it again i wouldn’t text ring let him do the work and he just fooling you into catching you i would be cautious and yes i would agree you probibly have herd it all before and he will move on and do the same again to some other poor girl
Aries..? Right
Like Michelle, I am a water sign (pisces) dating a scorpio man for the 1st time for the past months. We have so much in common that its scary. He is so loving and calls me and emails me through out the day, and unlike other men hes thrilled when i do text him or call, although like Michelle i dont do it as often as he does. He likes to find romantic things for us to do like dinner in a restaurant right on the beach. I think about him quite a bit , but hold back from telling him or from being as caring to him as he is for me because of everything ive read about scorpios. Many people say they are hot and cold. Heard so many stories about them changing a few months into a relationship. I dont know if my being reserved in this relationship will help or kill it? any info would be appreciated.
if it was me again i got hot hot hot hot then cold its over he actully had me believeing i was his soulmate now am wreacked is it worth the hassle no save your heart for a easier sign
honestly just go with the flow & see where it takes you, i have despite all the warnings. unless u cant handle the intensity. you live you learn! like the saying “better to have loved than lost.”
The saying is “better to have loved AND lost, than to have never loved at all”
Hi to Michele and Maria, About those Scorpio men of yours-I’d have to agree. I’m a Cancer woman age 45 and just happen to be 20 years older than “my”Scorpio man. He is exactly as described. We have an incredible amount of things in common and the sex is beyond incredible-passionate,sweet and caring.We had incredible chemistry and attraction even before we met in person(we met online and yes I know people are skeptical about that sort of thing) but he is a genuinely amazing person!And, I, being that Cancer crab in her shell, am usually very guarded about people in general, especially guys, but, I felt immediately at ease with him prior to meeting and the fireworks really went off when we did meet for the first time. He is romantic, passionate and sensual, and he came into my life when I was least expecting it, like a whirlwind ,sweeping me off my feet. I have never met anyone like him ,and am sure I never will again. He IS hot and cold, and alot of the reason for this is that he is a Rookie New York City firefighter working a ridiculous amount of mandatory overtime and often, not alot of free time.So unfortunately, I don’t get to see him too often,but when we are together it’s incredible.He’s the sexiest man, inside and out,that I’ve ever met in my life!I do think about him ALOT when we’re apart, and do text sometimes but not overkill, and occasionally leave him a hot voicemail-which he loves! I don’t ever want him to feel pressured because I know he can’t help what his job demands, but he being the Scorpio, I don’t want to be cause for that stinger coming out. Maybe we women are a bit intimidated by them,or maybe they’re just the best guys to ever come along in our lives and we don’t want to do anything to lose them. Ladies please write back!!
I have been seeing a scorpion man on&off now for a little over a month.
He told me he likes me , but yeah now it is like he has me playing some kind of guessing game as to what he really thinks about me .
I really like him a lot and I am trying to play it cool, but I do not like not knowing the whole deal
with him.( i am a Cancer woman)
We did have a little misunderstanding in the beginning,it made me a little
angry. i wanted to leave him a voice mail, but he ended up answering,
anyway everything was fine after that.
But now like i said i am not sure
about what is really going on in his head&i do not want to bother him
because he works hard all week & I am
trying to give him his space.
Anyway i guess I’ll just wait to see what happens.
Nancy,
I’m happy to finally find someone who shares similar experience, at least how the relationship started, online, mine thru FB. He showed his interest of me very subtly, without seeing my pix, but I gather he knew the big age gap (over 20 years gap), and I’m married.
Maybe you can help me to explain, why big age gap doesn’t bother some Scorpio
man? Can soul mate type of thing really overcome big age gap?
I really felt I spiritually connect with him, my spirit was so high while we interacted on FB, I couldn’t even stop smiling…., but I also felt anxious the same time.
Anyway he “unfriended” me, cause I couldn’t go forward with this. But I still miss him everyday dearly. How can those feeling be so strong, considering we have never physically met or talked to each other? Is it because we can’t get what we want that makes us miss more?
Haha… your post is almost 3 years ago, I hope this post is able to reach you.
Best Regards
W a Scorpio, it is totally possible to see past an age difference…i have been in love w my Scorpio ever since I first laid wyes on him in June of this yr…we broke up in July and he came back to me in Sept…maybe he missed me or loves me so deeply he can’t stand to be without me…that’s what every Scorpio lover hopes though. He’s told me when drunk that he loves me sooouch and from what I gather, they aren’t fickle in their affections…they will always love you or what they love abt you…the hot/cold thing has to do w .absorption of emotions more than losing or lacking them for you. They will make up their mind to end things w you but loves you or feels so deeply abt it that they go away for 2 weeks to make sure it’s the right decision becuz they understand your emotional investment…and honestly the time away is to prepare you for life without them as well as get it together in their heads. Trust that there is enough confidence within them to tell you on the spot, they just don’t because they feel your pain LITERALLY…unless they feel you aren’t worth their effort which they wouldn’t have even approached you because well they knew they would like you before they said hello to you…thats how in tuned they are w your energy…my Scorpio maybe on the distant end but i a Capricorn, knows when they are hiding tho…all except 2 of my friends are scorpios and all except 2 lovers have been scorpios…and with all i know abt them i have still yet to master not letting them flip the script on me…i let the distant thing get me everytime because i crave their affection…nothing is better than being surrounded by your Scorpio who’s gentleness is still too manly for words…good luck to those getting over one cuz i have yet to kick my addiction but note that there are so many of them willing to love you that you must not let yourself waste away from not having the love of one… ❤
I am a cancer girl who has also just started going out with a scorpio firefighter, I completely relate to and get the last post! Thank you
Wow!! That read was sooo so true! I have the worlds most odd relationship with a scorpio man. I met him 3yrs ago when he was in my city on a business trip. However we stayed in touch over the phone and via txt msgs. Over the past 3 yrs, he has said that he wants to marry me and that he loves me…but we NEVER HAD SEX! I feel so emotionally connected to him and its driving me insane! I told him I was dating someone and he got sooo upset! i’m so confused because although we talk and send pics to one another….we never made an attempt to get togetherin person! what kind of relationship is that? So I started dating, now he dosent want anything to do with me beyond just friends! lol!!!! I love him, but he’s a bit crazy!! That’s a scorpio for ya,…i guess! The whole jealous , insecure , controlling bit…its true! lolz @ him trying to control me via phone and txt! lol!!!
Hi Nancy and all. Yes he can be a little jealous for example if were text msging and i text him something that didnt make sense to him he has told me im texting the wrong person and that if im seeing someone else its okay just be honest!(being a pisces im good at reading his signs).So ill call him and explain and then well both laugh! if im not answering his calls (cause im busy or didnt hear the phone ring)hell leave me a msg that hes been thinking about me and to call him. Being out with him in public is different from other guys because we seem to have this connetion where i can tell what hes thinking and well start laughing. He doesnt seem to hide his feelings from me (at least not yet) but his friends and coworkers say he always has a serious face. Hes rowdy with his guy friends and can act a fool, but when were alone hes so loving and gentle. Like Nancy said sex is incredible hes so caring and passionate, but me being the pisces am much more playful during sex than he is. He is very intense and i will tease him why so serious, only then when i see his smile and hell pull me close and tell me hes just concentrating and laugh in that sexy voice of his. You can probably tell by now how caught up in him i am. I am 38 and have never felt this way about anyone including my ex husband (whos a leoby the way,) Maybe i should run now while i have one ounce of energy left..lol
I agree, agree, agree. I met this Scorpio man about a month ago and we can’t get enough of eachother. He is totally the mysterious, passionate man that has been described here. He is hardcore with his friends but so gentle with me. He compliments me from head to toe everyday. He is telling me I’m the one he wants to be with forever but how can I be sure? It’s only been a month. I don’t take him to serious and I never call him. This guy has an ego and has alot of confidence. I believe he can have anyone he wants but he’s with me almost all the time. We have an amazing chemistry and everyone that has been around us thinks the same. I would love for this to be long term but with a Scorpion man, the fire might run out.. I am doing everything so far to keep him interested in me. I am not chasing him or suffocating him. He needs to be free (that’s what he told me) so I give him his space but when he wants me, he will call me 10 times until I pick up. I just love it. I’ve had Scorpio friends and my brother is Scorpio but dating one is a whole different story.
It is not going to work out if you try extremely hard. You have doubts! Just be natural…yourself. I am Scorpio and I know what it like to date one.
Hi ladies. Well,since I last wrote,things have changed and I’m puzzled. His cold side has apparently kicked in big time,as he has disappeared completely.Things were seemingly great the last time we were together,and he spoke of”next time” as most likely being sometime in the week to come…AND NOTHING.This was four weeks ago. OK so, is this a Scorpio man behavior??If anyone has ANY input please share, and ,hey, if any of you ladies would like to converse off of this site ,let me know on here. LOL maybe we can have some consoling sessions.
Hi Nancy , yes my scorp disappeared
for a while about a month.
It’s been over a month since i’ve
seen him, i texted him some
messages no response for over
a week since he called me to say
he has a lot on his plate.
But does he think i still think
he is interested in me, oh and i had
let him know me and my bf han split up.
And never asked about it,but he knew
i was involved with someone from the beginning and it was kool.
but now i feel that he probably decided he was’nt into me any more
and did not want to look like
the bad guy and just told me he would be busy & will talk to me soon.Well i am not contacting him so if he wants to see me he can call me, but i don’t think i will be seeing him again, What do you think ?
Hi Nancy , yes my scorp guy also disappears for a while, then comes back . We had a little misunderstanding 3 months ago & he told me he wanted out, that he was done ! But when i mentioned to him that i was going out with a cop that following weekend.. i am pretty sure he was jealous. three weeks later he was back in my life ! now he has been playing hide & seek again , but telling me he is busy, which is fine , because i have been busy too.
Maybe he thinks i can’t survive without him .. well i can & i did very well before i even knew he existed. anyway i have not texted him in almost 2 weeks the longest time without contacting him, because he told me he would be away for 2 weeks.
And even when i think he may be back
i am definetly not contacting him, he knowa my number if he still wants to see me, otherwise i don’t care.
I would be very careful here Nancy. You are so wrong because he is in control, despite what you think. And I can bet, that by the time you get this note -if ever- you will understand is really, you know nothing about Scorpio men. How in the world you sleep around and expect him to be after you? Go and get a boring Libra or Virgo. Then you can do as you say and please, but don’t expect to find any treasures in there. Otherwise you are simply playing w/ fire. Good Luck ! LeoGirl
PS: I have been married to 1 for 18.5 years, and would give my life to this man. No one ever made me feel as cared, loved or protected.
That is experience that I have had with my exhusband and my boyfriend of 5 years. Both born on Nov 21. (I know) It has taught me how important living in the moment can be. Also, that he will be back….trust me.
Hello. And Bye.
I’ve met a scopio guy and he is the most awesome man i’ve ever been with i’m a aries women and i met him on the bus and he called me the same night we met, we was suppose to meet up two days later but he called the same night we made passionate love all night long and been seeing each other since but i think he have more women but i’m glad i came to this site so i could understand what i’m feeling and how to go about this relationship. he rally letting me know hat he want me. i hope i don’t mess this up
So true. I’ve been seeing an older Scorp man for the past two years….known him for about 5 years now. At first he was crazy about me and fixated on me all the time (he would sigh heavily whenever he passed me and would get visibly aroused all the time) I played it cool and let him know I liked him but no sex and such. After about two months of the above behavior, I told him I was moving elsewhere for a couple of years but wanted to see him regularly. At this point, he turned cold on me and has been hot and cold for the past two years now. It was not until last month that he started calling again and being more at ease with me. Did he see my moving away as a sign of betrayal?
Hi Baren 🙂 How can you be so sure my guy will be back?I mean , I’d REALLY love to believe that,but would I be deluding myself? You know what really bothers me about it now? In the beginning he offered,no, maybe insisted would be a better use of words, that he would come to the Nursery School that I run with all his fire gear, in January and talk to the kids about being a fireman. This was his idea 100%!!And he was beyond enthusiastic about it!At the time I said ‘well, this is provided of course that we’re still talking then’ and his reply was”why wouldn’t we be? I really like you”.It’s now 6 weeks since I’ve heard from him.So, what should I be thinking now?? And Lana, what in the world did you do to get through those two years of hot and cold?? I can’t imagine that, as 6 weeks seems like a nightmare to me. LOL- HELP!! What is it about these guys that gets such a hold on us?? I’m seriously glad we can all vent here! Thanks ladies !! 🙂
Hi everyone thought id also update like Nancy my scorp has gone MIA for a week now. Last time we went out everything was great. He said he might come over the following weekend before i left for a two week vacation with my girlfriends ..I dont crowd him i give himhis space. The only contact was when i texted him. He texted me back and forth. Now its been 5 days and he has not called me. Im supposed to spend his birthday with him, but i dont even want to call and find out if we are still on.I guess im getting the cold side of him now also!
oh nancy feel free to contact me at bipolarmariah@msn.com
Ladies, I first started seeing Scorp guy in January and we stopped in May after he ran cold and I sent a note why he was contacting me. At that point, we emailed 1x a week. He recently started texted me after 5 months and we ended up spending a few dates together. Please ladies, move on. It is not worth the emotional torture of WAITING for this guy. You are worth SO MUCH MORE. You deserve so much more.
Life is short, do you want to spend it pining for this loser or spend it living life. He’s not IT. If he was THE ONE, you would know it and you’d be *happy*.
From personal experience and lots of sleepless nights. :>
Good luck.
Hi Karen, Yes i am at the point of wanting to forget about a certain scorp guy. He has been away from me for over a month, and i understand he is busy, i have been busy too, but i still was trying to find time to see him. He did not come around had more excuses, funny thing is that we had a small misunderstanding 3 months ago and he said he wanted out. But 3 weeks later he came back why ? ?
If he knew he would not have enough time to see me anyway why bother ?
He knows that i like him & i felt that he liked me also.Anyway i textd him 3 days ago to see ehat was up & he textd back he would be gone for 2 weeks, why tell me that? I don’t really care anymore, i’m tired of his
games. And i am not texting him anymore to see if he’s back or not.
He says we are friends well he has not really proven that to much either
i think i had been a better friend than he will ever be.
To Nancy and Maria with the men who went MIA:
I’ve never known a Scorpio per se, but if a man disappears for SIX weeks, its probably best not to use his Scorpio sign as an excuse for this kind of behavior. Like, that’s a REALLY LONG TIME to not contact someone you’re dating, whatever the sun sign. Drop the dude.
to mkb, yeah call me after you meet one…lol
if i hadnt dated one i would not beleivin ghtis either, unfortunately theres another site just for scorpios with 1,000 member who afree this is the way they are.
FYI-1 week was too long for me and i have already moved on
i am an aries woman in a relationship with a scorpio man and he drives me completeley insane, he is intensely jealous, possessive and a control freak i love him to bits and his magnetism fascinates me, but he is really hard work we have been at loggerheads since the relationship started 4 months ago, and i have a funny feeling that if this relationship lasts it will continue! but hey i love him all gud and bad points, and he is very passionate loyal and true, he is the first scorpio i have dated and will probably be the last at times i feel like he drains me emotionally
OMG Katrina! I’m an Aries dating a Scorpio man myself, and I agree with you 100% about being emotionally draining. We live about 3 hours apart and when we are together it’s wonderful and then I won’t hear from him for days. I called him on this and he is not speaking to me…he frustrates the heck out of me but I love him! Yikes!!!!!
I am not trying to hurt your feelings by any means about your Scorp man.
I am a Cancer women with Taurus rising. I know these men ways QUITE well.
If you are not on the same level with them, they will go away..maybe come back to see if they can test you as being someone they really want. Yes, they are like that!..constantly testing you for many things that they ( we ) need to know is real in you. Scorps will seek out good sex, but if there is nothing more, then they will go away at some point for good.
Go read as much as you can about Aries women and Scorpio men. You will read that sex is good, but yet there is no tolerance for much of anything else. That is not good “building blocks” for any kind of future with this kind of man.
Out of kindness to you..wake up and smell the “black roses” with these men. You can either handle it and completely submit to them ( while still holding on to your own self-esteem ), or you might seriously want to put on your BEST track shoes and run away like you have never run before.
Yeah, remember don’t look back.
Yes, Water Born people look for what is real,loyal and 100% true. This is a very DEEP emotional thing with them. Yes, you will send lots of time with us proving your loyalty.. up to dealing with our moods and constant questions. Scorpio and Cancer signs are totally good at finding out if you are worthy of their true love and devotion. For the most part, we are truly better off with our own kind. Air Signs such as Aries are just someone we can play with for a short time..but only for sex.
Sorry!..I really am sorry to say this… but it is so true.
wow its amazing how much these posts are helping me out. im an aries woman in a relationship with a scorpio and i can tell ya… it is a real roller coaster ride. one minute everything is perfect. then the next minute we argue. then we make up again. crazy huh. 7 months of this but i know he really loves me. some of you ladies are crazy to put up with the disappearing act. the longest my scorpio ever disappeared without contact is 1 night. not even 24 full hours. so you guys make me feel real special. the information on how to deal with them is very helpful to me. i thought it was just me not understanding my man but i see its just the scorpio nature.
@ KMH,
*** Scorpio and Cancer signs are totally good at finding out if you are worthy of their true love and devotion ***
That sounded a little one sided.
My sister is a Cancer. I don’t mean to down talk Cancer, but is it true that water signs don’t have true compassion in sympathy and empathy for others but themselves?
With my sister, you can’t go to them talk true feeling, such as about your anxiety, your sorrow, your frustration, etc. She gets so irritated and attacked me for being whiny, told me to shut the hell up, while she can complain all day long about others, as she’s always a victim, and expect others to listen, if not, she got all defensive about. Hummm…. I really start to think those sensitive signs are sensitive for their own feelings, not for others…..
Not to generalize all signs, but just from reading up about Scorpios and Cancer, who both have trouble trusting people, and feel they are entitled to test people, while those testing are truly hurting their love ones.
To Wanda, did you say you thinks he has more women, if you did why would you be so worried about messing it up. I may miss my scorp, (im sure as hell aint gonna call him) but if he had another woman or more women that would be a darn good reason to leave and never look back.
Hi Maria and everyone.So it’s now been two months and nothing from him.Next Saturday is his birthday and I’m planning to text him Happy Birthday. But I’ve decided that if I don’t get any response back,I’m going to drop the whole thing,because anyone who won’t even respond with a “thank you”upon hearing Happy Birthday is just rude. I’m feeling hurt and angry now. I just do not understand why guys talk about things in the beginning without provocation,like future plans for months down the road and how awesome they think you are and then take off. I know I’m probably naive,but I just really don’t get why they would say something they didn’t mean. I didn’t pressure him in any way-he always said these things on his own.CONFUSED-HELP-LOL!!And Maria, I am going to write you at the address you gave me,I’ve just been really busy with my Nursery School. Feedback please!
I am a Sag and I have a Scorpio man as well. I am from a fire sign so I literally put up with nothing from this man from the beginning. I respect him as a man but I expect it in return. In the beginning of our relationship he would contact me daily early in the day and we saw each other frequently but he would disappear every week for a day or two. When he would contact me back I was busy with other dates. I don’t wait around for him and he knows I wouldn’t do that. I don’t put up with disappearing acts so he doesn’t do that anymore. I will find someone that really wants to be with me all of the time not just on his terms but mine as well. I will not live in a guessing game. I hate that you did this to yourself. I see the date as Oct 2008 so I’m sure it’s resolved by now. LOL!
i heard there is alot of passion between libras and scorpios… but can there be a long termed relationship
I am not trying to hurt your feelings by any means about your Scorp man.
I am a Cancer women with Taurus rising. I know these men ways QUITE well.
If you are not on the same level with them, they will go away..maybe come back to see if they can test you as being someone they really want. Yes, they are like that!..constantly testing you for many things that they ( we ) need to know is real in you. Scorps will seek out good sex, but if there is nothing more, then they will go away at some point for good.
Go read as much as you can about Aries women and Scorpio men. You will read that sex is good, but yet there is no tolerance for much of anything else. That is not good “building blocks” for any kind of future with this kind of man.
Out of kindness to you..wake up and smell the “black roses” with these men. You can either handle it and completely submit to them ( while still holding on to your own self-esteem ), or you might seriously want to put on your BEST track shoes and run away like you have never run before.
Yeah, remember don’t look back.
Yes, Water Born people look for what is real,loyal and 100% true. This is a very DEEP emotional thing with them. Yes, you will send lots of time with us proving your loyalty.. up to dealing with our moods and constant questions. Scorpio and Cancer signs are totally good at finding out if you are worthy of their true love and devotion. For the most part, we are truly better off with our own kind. Air Signs such as Libra are just someone we can play with for a short time..but only for sex.
Sorry!..I really am sorry to say this… but it is so true.
Actually air signs normally break up with water signs, not the other way around … Scorpio may be the exception but this the norm with cancer and pisces. Air signs tend to be very intellectual and independent while water is emotional and possesive. Also, above you mentioned Aries was an air sign — fire sign.
Hi Nancy… I understand ,a lil, how you feel…I’ve been “pursuing” for lack of a better word, this scorpio guy since July. At first everything was really good…and then he just stopped contacting me…so I played the game with him for awhile, but then I broke down and contacted him…WE picked up like we hadn’t skipped a beat…then nothing…this has been going on off and on since then…In the mean time, I fill my time with other things, but he is always on my mind….I don’t know what it is about him…anyway, his b-day was yesterday. I texted him and nothing…Then I called him 2x today and I still haven’t heard back…I am about ready to say bump it and move on…But I just can’t…my feelings for him are too real…
Hey Huny. Wow !! It sounds like you really understand where I’m coming from on this one!Yeah, I can’t seem to bring myself to just ditch the whole thought of him,and what makes it harder, is remembering how good it was the times we were together. Going back to our very first conversation online and all of the sweet things he said to me. It wasn’t like he was giving me a load of crap. He was just being his cute,energetic,enthusiastic (somewhat high strung- LOL)self!Why is it SO EASY for some women who write in here to dismiss these guys and to advise us to do the same??Feel free to contact me at Nsk63@aol.com I’d love to talk further with you! :)Thanks!
Hi Everyone,
I got mixed up with a Scorpio over a month ago. He pursued me for awhile and I really didn’t give him the time of day. I am just finalising my divorce and hadn’t really thought about being with anyone at this point (Even though the marriage has been OVER emotionally and physically for many years).Then one night I went to a party at his home and something-(really no way to explain it)-exploded between us. Unfortunately, I think (opinions please) I slept with him that night and had the most amazing sex I have ever had in my life (and I’m 39!). Anyway-for 2 weeks we saw each other everyday and it was whirlwind. Then I acted stupid (fresh from a nightmare of a psychotic ex-I have my trust issues) and my oldest son found out and confronted him in an attempt to ‘defend my honor’ I suppose. At this point things cooled instantly. Since then he has taken me to a party with his closest friends and then NOTHING for days….We met up Friday, had a wonderful time, spent the night and now NOTHING. I have not texted him since Sunday and just broke down and texted to see if he would respond. He hasn’t. I am seeing another man as well (not sexually) because I refuse to put all my eggs in one basket but I really like Mr.Scorpio with his exciting life.Thanks for listening to my LONG story LOL….How do I handle this with dignity and not push him away? Any advice is so welcome!
My scorpio guy is back !
Really passionate feelings .
It’s always great , but then he sends
me mixed messages. Friends , but i think he has jealousy if he hought
another man would be with me & having sex. Does he feel that i am his property ? If he has deeper feelings for me he surely hides it very well.
my birthday is coming up & he knows when it is & i am wondering if he is planning anything. I dropped a few hints but he has not said much of anything really.
The other thing that is odd is that he has mentioned on a few occasions
that he wanted another guy to join us
the reason is because he says it takes me along time to climaxx & he wants me to get off first & then he wants to do me . But i think he is not really serious, because i don’t
think he would want to share me with another man. Anyway so far it’s beeb better with us even though we have never had a fight. Has any of you other women dating scorpio men experienced this ?
Hello Cancer girl. The scorpio you describe sounds uncannyingly like a guy I know. Just everything you said about him. Out of curiosity where are you from?.
Jenny, both of you need to explore each other on meaningful planes of intimacy, way beyond the act of squeaky bedspring sex.
I do realize this ferocious event happened over 2 years ago, so he’s probably now sharing his seed with any gullible maiden who wants it… as he intended to do while with you and prior to being with you.
If he felt like you wanted blatant control or you tried to undermine him through the weapon of sex or mind games, that is a good assertion as to why he may have left to the cave.
Also, if unevolved… he may have thought only about the physical feast of you… while dumping the self-honest maturity and strength needed to fully commit to you.
Don’t blame yourself. Blame him for not transforming your inner-worlds of feeling and values through his lack of depth, wisdom, strength and individuality.
Ok Jenny, we have to talk!!And hey everyone, I talked to my guy today-SURPRISE!!!I saw him online which I haven’t for two months, and decided to just say hi. And,surprise of surprises, he actually answered me. We talked for about 20 minutes and I asked if he was still planning to come and talk to my nursery school class-HE SAID YES!And , he’s very excited about it.He also apologized for not being around or texting- I’m in shock!The down side is-DRUMROLL- he and his ex are working on things. But, you know what, I’m OK with that, I think-LOL. I mean it bothers me, tinge of jealousy,but I’m really just relieved and happy that he A)talked to me B)is Ok(regarding his job and all)and C)isn’t letting me or my nursery school kids down.So, yes ladies,these guys really are what we’ve all been talking about on here-unpredictable(big time),majorly hot and cold,and irresistable!And, to any ladies who have written in and have not experienced the Scorpio man,find one and you’ll know what we’re all talking about here!!
Ladies PLEASE stop giving men this much power over you! I’m a huge lover of astrology and obviously found this site by searching for info on Scorpio men. BUT as I was reading these posts I started getting so infuriated- not at you, but at these men for treating you all this way. If a man only makes you an option then why are you making him a priority?!! Don’t worry or try to predict the next move “your Scorpio man” is going to make– Make YOUR OWN moves! “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”–> Eleanor Roosevelt. TAKE YOUR POWER BACK LADIES!! And that is coming from a 24 year old Cancer female!!
I’m done now… I’m going to go watch Obama win this election and celebrate!
No Liz. Just the opposite of what you think.
A woman (subconsciously) Wants to feel out of control. But she won’t admit it. She Wants that feeling of submission while Trusting the power of her surrender to a worthy male. Even though inward surrender does frighten her to death, her intense experiences are ‘exactly’ what she wants and needs to transform.
The thing is… she is just too innocent to know it. Regardless of her age or sexual experience.
When ambivalent emotions enter her… the reality of her “self-esteem” then becomes a non-issue.
Trusting the Truth of a deep union means trusting the capacity of her own real feelings. Not trusting is denying the Truth of such a bond.
We male Scorpios simply make your unknown depths of feeling known. Especially through the channel of sex.
cont….
So once a woman has entered the Dark of her hidden soul, through transformational sex-soul bonding… she then fears the sheer impact of depth found and envisioned in her deeper-self.
Aka, the Unknown.
In essence… each transformational experience does have ‘extremes’ riddled within it. People must not be afraid of those extremes, but look to Understand their hidden Origins.
The Persephone girl who once “thought” but did not see the depth of her own heart and soul above the ground in her frivolous day-light activities… now begins ‘to See’ the beauty and riches discovered moving her within the Underworld of her own Shadow.
Here is an important idea to keep in mind… Hedonistic pleasures are not a Pure highway into the caverns of the Soul. Any drug, food, alcohol or lust motivated sex laced binge or escape to justify ones weak indulgences… will only, and I mean only… end in a delusional date with the Devil himself.
And I don’t care how ‘In Love’ two people “think” they are… If any hedonsitic tendencies infiltrate the Realism of the Soul… all karmic DEEDS will pay their due. On YOU. That’s no guess. That is a promise.
Handling our Shadow is to understand an immortal self-knowledge, sans drugs. It is to Understand what real pain and evil IS, and to really know what it means in our above-ground lives, and what those above-ground lessons DO to our manifestations of reality.
People avoid consequence because that would mean finding the Truth of ones deeds and experiences.
Go Obama!!! What a wonderful day for America!….Anyways-Liz, I agree and I have my Girl Power, lol. But I also believe in giving someone as great as my Scorpio man a chance. And, keep in mind I had been in a very unhealthy relationship with a psycho until I got my education and left. As a result, I tend to have warped perceptions at times and am working with a therapist to be healthy and patient in relationships. So, it may not entirely be him. We had a great date on Friday and I’m sitting there worrying because he didn’t call on Monday. Yet we talked Saturday and Sunday. Actually, he even texted me while he was at a very important business function Saturday night. So, I think it is me just being fruity. We talked last night and I opened up, admitted that my perceptions are not right at times but also told him that he seems guarded and that his steel wall was obviously opened by invite only and he disagreed. I think he knows I hit the nail on the head though because when I told him that I get it-he is guarded-and it is ok he then opened up big time and called this morning to tell me he isn’t ignoring me and reassured me. Kind of sweet of him. So, we will see. He is just too wonderful-smart, successful and funny to turn away from too quickly. So, we’ll see where we go from here. The ball is in his court. Nancy-glad you heard from him and, I agree, these men are irresistable and remarkable people. One of my sons is a Scorpio-can’t wait to see how he turns out!
Hello ladies…my name is chaunda (shon-da) and I’m a capricorn woman who has been in 3 VERY serious long term relationships with scorp men. I’ve been reading all of the responses on this site and I felt the need to inform you on how to handle a scorpio mans behavior. OK….my 1st scorp and I were together for 5yrs. I battled with the hot-cold ,on-off drama until I finally called it quits! Scorp #2 behaved the same way but I was so immune to scorp#2s behavior because scorp#1 toughend me up to their bullsh#t!!… the difference w/#2 was that I wasnt that in to him so he chased me until the order of restraint was in place! By the time #3 came along I realized that in order to tame a male scorp, you must maintain a certain amount of mystery. He gets bored because we women fall for their all or nothing tactic too soon in the courtship…ITS ALL A GAME !! They are the masters of seduction and they live in their emotions for the moment. They will tell you what you want to hear to get you where they want you and cut you off cold turkey! If you chase them it’ll only make it worse..if they don’t call you…DONT CALL THEM!!!!. Act as if you didn’t even notice the days had gone by since you last spoke because you were soooo busy! (yea right) lol but remain pleasant and don’t nag…Please take their proposals and promises with a grain of salt. Have fun with them ,get a life and remain light hearted. When they see that your not easy to capture and you dont appear to be desperate for a relationship, they will stop the games and become the worlds most loving ,passionate and caring men that you could only dream or read about in love novels!!! That is how I got #3 to propose to me after 1yr of dating. We’ve been married 4yrs and 8mos and I STILL have hot cold issues will him BUT I turn it into something positive and look at it as time to spend on me exp; hair,nails shopping etc… or to hang out with my son. When he gets through his dark moments he comes back with so much passion and it gets better with time!! Trust me!!
“… He gets bored because when women fall for their all or nothing tactic too soon in the courtship…ITS ALL A GAME !!…”
No sweetheart. It’s only ‘A Game’ or ‘A Tactic’ to the person with a roadblocked mind and soul… who is blinded by the fickle dance and seduction of superficiality.
Skimming along the surface in love is offensive to a rich male Scorpionic nature.
Choose your Scorpios wisely little Goat. Don’t be afraid to delve deeper before you get all grubby and sidetracked by a black Scorpionic heart.
Money, looks, public image and career status never make the man. Never forget that illusion.
It is fine discovering thorns when relating… they are not bad for you. So dig deeper past appearances. With open eyes, you will eventually see black roses emitting poison. Those invisible poisons certainly ARE bad for your soul.
What do you smoke? I want the same!;)
continued….. however its sooo important to let them know that you are there for them and you only have eyes for them because they need constant reassurance. when they are in their dark phases, buy an “i love you” card and leave it where they will find it..they love little secrective love games! keep it spicy and interesting and they will do the rest! Its so easy, just lighten up and live your life. He will never stray if you don’t give him the slightest reason to.
thanks for reading! toodles!!! 🙂
Chaunda: you were pretty much 100% correct in your posting about how to deal with and maintain your sanity dealing with Scorp Men.
In a month I will have made it a year with my Scorpio and the ride has been….interesting. (Ok, I’m lying it has been the most draining but passion filled year of my life). The hot-cold thing is soo true and you do have to ignore them from time to time just to keep them off balance. The tricky part is to not use jealous mind games in the process. Mentioning other men that sort of thing, they are indeed possessive even when they run cold.
However, when you sense them pulling away let them know you are there for them but then leave them alone until they can re-charge their batteries or whatever the hell it is they do when they withdraw 🙂
They are incredibly passionate people so maybe this is necessary for them to have some emotional balance. I dunno, but it still drives me crazy, I just reassure him I am there but then I leave him alone.
They like lots of sex and express their passion and emotion in a very physical sense. Also they can really appreciate a girl girl, a woman that is very feminine. Very sensitive they respond well do emotional depth..it pulls them out of there shell. But only if its genuine and not being used as an ulterior motive.
This is a man’s man and he does not respond too well to teasing either. (found that out the hard way. I allow my Scorp his time and to feel like he is leading (even though I have usually planted the seeds of the great ideas in his head) and then I withdraw on him every so often ….typically there is some beautifully written email or a flurry of calls and some fabulous boxes from Victorias Secret soon to follow. Good Luck with yours
dude you know what I’m talking about! soy desole
hi ladies;) !!! My name is Jen & I wanted to let everyone know what it’s like to date a Scorpio … I’m a Pisces & we have been together for over 5 years & I’m 27 y/o! So this has been the longest relationship of my life… & he is the only one that I have considered my soulmate or someone I could spend the rest of my life with… So we are very compatible … When we first got together we justclicked … He would finish my sentences & I would finish his:) for the first couple of years he treated me like a princess & I always knew how he felt about me…. But things started to change after a couple of years… He suggested we move in together cuz he thought that if we didn’t than we wouldn’t work out .,. So I did & things ended up going from great to bad….tho my love for him has grown stronger I’m not sure if this relationship is healthy for me anymore… Gradually over the years I lost most of my friends because he was too jealous while he kept all of his friends…, he did include me with his friends all the time but it wasnt the same….Scorpios are very controlling … For example he would say u can watch n e movie that u want & I would pick one out & he would say that’s a dumb movie & I would pick out another one & he would say not that one & finally we would just watch something he felt like watching!! Stuff like that … Or they can get mad @ u if u did something on accident…. So me being a Pisces & extremely senstive & emotional … Has. Started to wear me down … I don’t know if I can live this way n e more… I feel like I just need to swim away … But it’s hard to!! He’s got such a strong hold on my heart! Btw… We do t live together n e more… We were fighting way too much…. Some positives about my Scorpio .., he has shown me that I can make my dreams come true… Evertime I’ve needed him he had been there for me… And he trullycares about pleasing me & making me happy….it’s just all the games & the fighting & not knowing has started to take it’s toll on me ;( his negatives … Has to be right all the time… Believes the woman has her role man has his… Can be demeaning….very secretive. Has n e one out there been in a long relationship like me & have advice?!
hey jen. i can totally relate to nearly all you just wrote. i have been on and off with my scorpio man for 5years too, also lived with him in the beginning but like you too much fighting.. although even now that we live apart we still fight. its crazy but i still love him even though during and immediately after our fights i vow to myself its over for good i cant seem to let him go and end up spending days in bed crying hoping he will call me or come around and say sorry. but i know he won’t. he has never said sorry. he might come back but the usual pattern has been a few weeks.. meanwhile i go completely crazy and think he is probably sleeping with other women. i know ths relationship has taken a HUGE toll on me. i have never cried this much in my life. nor have i felt so much for someone. but it has been so hot and cold.. just when things are really good and i feel like i might get a consistent loving relationship from him he picks a fight with me over absolutely nothing it gets ugly cos he becomes really nasty and never cares that he is hurting me then he leaves. its fucked really. but when he is into me it is so close i feel like he is my soulmate and i know we will be together for life.then..SNAP! back to being an asshole again. i feel so trapped. but i love him. sometimes i feel like i want to die even.i am avirgo with a scorpio moon so i can be pretty intense too. i just wish it could be easier with him but i know from five years and from reading stuff that he will probably always be like this. i dont know if i am strong enough to cope.
wow… im in awe… you have just written my life story with my man. i dont have to say anything because u said it all for me and im an aries
Hi, i were involved last year with a scorpio man(im a cancer)he told me he loved me after 4 months,then a few days later said he needed alone time,8 MONTHS later h contacts me,things are better this time but i had 8 months of hell
I am a pisces woman and I have been seeing a scorpio male for about two months, but have known him for 10 years on a professional basis. He kept pursing me and finally gave in after ending a long relationship with a capricorn. On our first date i established the rules with him (because we both are well known in our community, although we are both single, not everyone would approved of us) that it only would be a sexual relationship, once a week or so. But now feelings are seeping in and think on his part. He has resented my rules from the beginning. He keeps things in but I can see the games hes playing and his jealousy. Please help someone, what is he thinking, he told me is seeing someone in a different state, so I told him I am also seeing someone only on the weekends in ny, I am in dc. I thing every weekend I away hes pissed off. I cant read him too well. The sex is wonderful and almost teary, but when its over he appears pissed off again. Any advice on how read this guy would help. Also he is exceptionally handsome.
I’m in quite an interesting situation- I’m currently dating a scorpio and I am an Aries. I haven’t bumped heads with him yet, but if there is one thing about a scorpio i know, he is never straight up about anything, and I am. I don’t know where I stand with him and I don’t dare say how I feel because I have too much pride for that!
I don’t chase men- it’s not my style and I can tell this scorpio is playing games. All I want to know are some tricks of the trade. What can I do to torment him? LOL I really want to get under his skin and see what his motives are.
Oh and P.S. Scorpios are way hard to read, and it’s not fun- I don’t like to pry but with a scorpio it’s almost necessary. It’s sad that i waste my time thinking about how to turn the tables on a scorpio- but I keep running into the same situations with scorpios and want to put it to an end.
well ladies im a scorpio..guy…haha…well yeah i just notice all these stuff about me and is true..im seeing this libra girl she always calls but i dont answer i dont know why? im sorry i do care for her but..is me..she tells me she loves me..n i really appreciate that..thats why i love her..but i havent talk to her for like 1 week n like 3 days..im not playing a game..is just scorpio ways..and im sorry for that..ill call her when im ready..but just know..i really doo care about her in every way….
This is all I needed to hear! That when a scorpio guy doesn’t call, it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s not interested…that I just have to wait and give him his time and space, and he’ll call eventually…thank you!
me and that scorpio guy we have some chemistery that i have never experienced before. he’s great! he “gets” me, he’s considerate, he’s everything i want. but unlike the men ur talking about, he never mentions the future, the furthest he mentions is our next date. ive known him for 4 months now and we ve been dating for a month. he holds my hands and kisses me passionately, but didnt have sex yet. i dont call, i only call back.. and i dont text him aot, if i get a reply then we keep on txting back and forth. im trying to give him his space, and im not pressuring him at all.. i like him a lot, and wanna keep him. im a virgo, i hate to be controlled and from what i read over here scorpios seem to be control freaks, what do u think i should do? any hints?
kami, thats exactly my situation too, i have no idea where i stand.. i cant tell him how i feel coz my pride wont let me. also i dont wanna scare him away. if u learn anything new, please share it!!! i need help !
just be real with em…scorpios will uderstand just dont over do it or youll push him away..
NOW the guy wants to jump into bed with me… we’ve been dating for a month and he’s obssessed w touching me, kissing me and so on. he’s not thinking about anything else. im still not ready to have sex with him. and im confused about his feelings. i donnu whether he wants to simply fool around with me or if he really cares about me. thats why i dont wanna have sex with him. does anyone here understand what im talking about?
scorpio 18? Do you have any idea why you need that kind of space? Does it hurt her? If so, why are you still able to do it if you care about her? I’m soooo not giving you a hard time, I truly want to understand because the guy I’m interested in does the same thing and I just can’t understand why he does it when he says he loves me.
Thanks for any input you can give.
Hey, guys. I just wanted to say something in reply to the scorpio guy, who doesn’t call his girl back, for fear he might be misunderstood…do you think about where things are going? (And not in a sense you can’t handle it…scorpios really Are geared for love) do you worry if you get more serious, you will hurt her? See, scorpions don’t play games…they don’t run hot and cold. They only know one temperature – smoldering hot. The “coldness” some of you ladies have seen is merely them surrounding themselves with that impenetrable wall…probing into a scorpio’s inner feelings is like scraping concrete with a plastic spoon. They will only ever reveal as much as they choose, and if you are in a relationship with one, you better start getting used to it. That’s precisely what it felt like with my scorpio at first. (Now an ex, technically and practically) Anyway, I was getting at the fact that a scorpio would keep you at an arms’ length for his own reasons, often because he is trying to protect you, either from himself or some other unforseen obstacle he himself sees, but NEVER to boost his ego, or prove he is a player. These men don’t need reassurance, they know they are superior. (And unless they are an unevolved specimen, they are)…just notice that supreme, quiet, dignified confidence and unshakable glare a scorpio has in the midst of everyone else in a crowd. Scorpios in general are very devoted and they look faaaar down the line, when they get into a love afair. They worry senseless, although you will never see this on his stone face. They feel deeply, but it takes a very patient woman, who truly understands them in order for them to let themselves open up to her. But ladies, trust me…once you really open the floodgates of his love (not a mere affection), he could really drown you in love. And yes, they are very demanding, sometimes cruel for their own reasons and love with them can feel very emotionally draining…but again the catch is in truly understanding this man. Not many girls manage that, as they are used to the more mellow, compromising sun signs. If you are getting yourself into a love affair with a scorpio, be prepared to be an open book…they will figure out what’s in the darkest corners of your soul before you even know it. You would have to have high morals and be a good citizen in order to win their respect. Honesty is a BIG thing for them…a scorpion may forgive an occasional slip up, but he will never forgive you a lie. You may even be surprised at how gentle he can be and protect those weaker than him. By this I don’t mean you should be a crying mess…remember, if you want to keep this man you will have to win his respect. But if you do let your guard down on occasion and confide your fear or uncertainty to him, he will give you wings you couldn’t have hoped for. Scorpio men are also very honest. You will not catch them sneaking behind your back or misleading you. Also forget about emotional demands and ultimatums…these women tricks don’t work on these men. Never ever give him any reason to be jealous. If you try to make him jealous hoping to get more attention from him, it will only have the opposite effect. Remember these men are very powerful. If there is a good reason for the relationship to end, a scorpion will remain silent even though burning inside.
All in all, your best bet, I think, would be to get to know each other first (they may get in a relationship, but will seldom choose a partner for life, if slept on the first date. I am not saying that’s impossible), be straight and honest and be clear about what you want. Be someone, who holds their stance, he will respect you for it…although, be prepared for compromising when you clash with him, with him things really either go his way or not at all. You may help shape his ideas, but the ultimate decision will be his. Never fool yourself into believing you have control over him. You will be the most precious thing in his life he will fiercely protect and love, but he alone is a master of himself. Extremely intuitive. Loves being in long term relationships. Has a deep emotional need to connect with a lover and if he really chooses you, he will throw himself into building this relationship. You will have to be the one to live up to his high standards. I’ve forgotten what else I wanted to say…I am here in my bed missing my man and this is how I got on this site. In conclusion, once a scorpio has loved and cared for you, he will always have love in his heart for you, long after the romantic love has gone. Some of you may notice some scorpios often talk and are still friends with their exes. This is a rare marvellous man, who may bruise you, but will always be brutally honest, and can show you highs you only dream about. It will be up to you to get and keep him.
Thanks for sharing that! I’m a Virgo, just started dating an amazing Scorpio man. Interestingly, I think our relationship has gone even more smoothly because I have taken time to understand his astrology signs tendencies. I’m very intuitive also, so I had already recognized his penchant for digging for truth, hints of jealousy, testing me out. But understanding his Scorpio nature has allowed me to let go of some of my fears…maybe clarifying for me his intentions behind his actions.
Luckily, I’m very honest by nature. Most say I am too honest. So I think this is making us extremely compatible. He has said to me multiple times, “you have such a good heart”. I know this is very valuable to him, so I’m glad that it is one of my genuine characteristics.
I was worried about previous hot/cold comments made by other women. I have had brief periods of time (not more than 24 hrs) where he is busy and turns his phone off, etc. Normally, with most other guys, I would have been immediately suspicious. But, with him, I have never seen a reason to suspect deceitfullness or tricking me. I know he just genuinely has his own way of balancing things, and it is his way of being in control of his own life.
Ironically, I do feel that my previous relationships have conditioned me perfectly to be a great match for him. I have developed a healthy attitude of patience and self-confidence, especially not needing to be right anymore. As the saying goes…”would you rather be right, or be happy?” I’ve also learned to appreciate honesty and dedication and definitely DON’t take it for granted. My Scorpio is the most chivalrous and attentive man I have ever known. And I value every second of it.
Hi Rebecca,
The definition of “right” is very subjective…as well as “happiness”, and rightfully so. It is not a constant. I liked your clarity in that statement. However, you also say this:
“He has said to me multiple times, “you have such a good heart”. I know this is very valuable to him, so I’m glad that it is one of my genuine characteristics”
Do you feel that you have a good heart – beyond the fact that he “told you so”? With Scorpio, what is manifested, must be placed back into the unknown…as to keep the dynamic – as defined as YOU – transformative and transcending. It is very much like the phoenix…you must burn to ashes everyday, and throw those ashes to the air…where they came from.
I am happy for you.
Hi Rebecca. i relate to your post and wanted to see how things have developed for you. Hope to hear from you that all is well.
Hey, guys. I just wanted to say something in reply to the scorpio guy, who doesn’t call his girl back, for fear he might be misunderstood…do you think about where things are going? (And not in a sense you can’t handle it…scorpios really Are geared for love) do you worry if you get more serious, you will hurt her? See, scorpions don’t play games…they don’t run hot and cold. They only know one temperature – smoldering hot. The “coldness” some of you ladies have seen is merely them surrounding themselves with that impenetrable wall…probing into a scorpio’s inner feelings is like scraping concrete with a plastic spoon. They will only ever reveal as much as they choose, and if you are in a relationship with one, you better start getting used to it. That’s precisely what it felt like with my scorpio at first. (Now an ex, technically and practically) Anyway, I was getting at the fact that a scorpio would keep you at an arms’ length for his own reasons, often because he is trying to protect you, either from himself or some other unforseen obstacle he himself sees, but NEVER to boost his ego, or prove he is a player. These men don’t take abything lightly and don’t need reassurance, they know they are superior. (And unless they are an unevolved specimen, they are)…just notice that supreme, quiet, dignified confidence and unshakable glare a scorpio has in the midst of everyone else in a crowd. Scorpios in general are very devoted and they look faaaar down the line, when they get into a love afair. They worry senseless, although you will never see this on his stone face. They feel deeply, but it takes a very patient woman, who truly understands them in order for them to let themselves open up to her. But ladies, trust me…once you really open the floodgates of his love (not a mere affection), he could really drown you in love. And yes, they are very demanding, sometimes cruel for their own reasons and love with them can feel very emotionally draining…but again the catch is in truly understanding this man. Not many girls manage that, as they are used to the more mellow, compromising sun signs. If you are getting yourself into a love affair with a scorpio, be prepared to be an open book…they will figure out what’s in the darkest corners of your soul before you even know it. You would have to have high morals and be a good citizen in order to win their respect. Honesty is a BIG thing for them…a scorpion may forgive an occasional slip up, but he will never forgive you a lie. You may even be surprised at how gentle he can be and protect those weaker than him. By this I don’t mean you should be a crying mess…remember, if you want to keep this man, if you want to even get him, you will have to win his respect. But if you do let your guard down on occasion and confide your fear or uncertainty to him, he will give you wings you couldn’t have hoped for. Scorpio men are also very honest. You will not catch them sneaking behind your back or misleading you. Also forget about emotional demands and ultimatums…these women tricks don’t work on these men. Never ever give him a reason to be jealous. If you try to make him jealous hoping to get more attention from him, it will only have the opposite effect. Remember these men are very powerful. If there is a good reason for the relationship to end, a scorpion will remain silent even though burning inside.
All in all, your best bet, I think, would be to build an emotional bond first (they may get in a relationship, but will seldom choose a partner for life, if slept on the first date. I am not saying that’s impossible), be straight and honest and be clear about what you want. Be someone, who holds their stance, he will respect you for it…although, be prepared for compromising when you clash with him, with him things really either go his way or not at all. You may help shape his ideas, but the ultimate decision will be his. Never fool yourself into believing you have control over him. You will be the most precious thing in his life he will fiercely protect and love, but he alone is a master of himself. Extremely intuitive. Loves being in long term relationships and has a deep emotional need to connect with a lover and if he really chooses you, he will throw himself into building this relationship. You will have to be the one to live up to his high standards. I’ve forgotten what else I wanted to say…In conclusion, once a scorpio has loved and cared for you, he will always have love in his heart for you, long after the romantic love has gone. Some of you may notice some scorpios often talk and are still friends with their exes. They really are hipocrites, when it comes to their own quirks, but do not take this as a weakness of theirs. This is a rare marvellous man, who may bruise you, but will always be brutally honest, and can show you highs you only dream about. If this kind of man is really what you want and think you can handle, it will be up to you to live up to it.
My Scorpio told me he loves me a little over a week ago. We were in contact for another day or two, but now he doesn’t return my phone calls. Its hard to believe someone who says that and then does nothing to show it. I just want to understand.
I’m a Cancer woman and I met a Scorpio man about 2 months ago. We talked on the phone for a few weeks and then went out together. He would go through spells of not calling me back for a day or two, but I didn’t really think anything of it and didn’t mention it the next time we talked. Entering the 2nd month, we did sleep together and I couldn’t get that out of my mind. It was really mind-blowing! I talked to him last on Saturday when he called and I told him I’d call him back later that evening. He didn’t answer the phone, so I left a message. He still hasn’t called back two days later, so I texted him that I was tired of his game-playing and didn’t think this would work out. Of course, in true fashion, he still hasn’t responded. I’m not mad – just disappointed that a grown up acts like a child. Instead of being an adult and discussing an issue, they would rather continue playing games and miss out on a good person to prove a point. What point is that? I will be moving on with my life – I don’t have time to waste on someone who doesn’t think I’m important enough to treat with common courtesy and respect. I don’t treat people like that and I will not tolerate being treated like that by anyone – I don’t care what their zodiac sign is. To me, a real man does away with games that teenagers play. Relationships have to have a level of respect from both parties and if someone thinks they have to use manipulation and games to get what they want, then they are definitely not the one for me. I’m a grown woman, I don’t have to play those games. I communicate what I want and need to the man I’m in a relationship with. But, just like the Scorpio can ignore, once I retreat into my shell after being “stung”, it’s hard for me to come back out for you. If he ever contacts me again, there will be nothing there to come back because I’m done. He won’t get a second chance to mistreat me.
Wow!!! I feel soooo much better now that I’ve read these comments about scorpio men!! I was going crazy wondering why this guy would tell me he loves me, gets jealous over me….but DOSENT CALL,TREATS ME BAD and NEVER RESPONDS TO MY TEXTS!!! I feel if you love someone you would want to talk to them! Its been 3wks and he hasn’t called me one time!! I’m doing all the calling!! but I’m done now as well! No more games! ladies, I believe that these men only say they love you to control you! F*ck em’ ..going to find me a taurus man!!!!!
no we dont say that..
if you loooking for someone else well i dont blame you..
i love all of you..
you missin out
yeah right scorpio18!!! yes, I will be missing out on heartache and pain!!! I can give myself good passionate sex!! LOL! I’m a capricorn woman, I’d rather put up with geminis sillyness…although he wil irritate me to the point of hair lost,at least he calls and shows attention!!! Scorpio men can suck butt!! I have to much self respect to sit around and wait for a man to “show” me the feelings that he “tells” me he has for me! KICK ROCKS!
Oh…id also like to add that I mean no harm in anyway to any of you women who are willing to deal with that mess!!! More power to you, I hope it all works out in the end after you change your behavior to suit him and he goes off and becomes someone elses man!! LMAO…MERRY XMAS…SELF LOVE IS PRICELESS!!!
im not like that..
if you have a scorpio dont ever push him away
he is like no other guy i nnotice that
i always atrract people to me
my friends tell me im too confident they like being around me in public
i dont follow or lead im netural
we are the realiest out there and this zodiac stuff just puts me on the game to understand myself idk about that jealous stuff tho im not..
you aint gotta date a scorpio
if you ever curious about being drowned with passion then yeah
like myself i push myself away from girls
cause is a trust issue to brake hat wall you gotta be nice and str8 up and patient tell em youll be there for them if you being hurt tell em how you feel we really really care about peoples feelings it takes a patient not judgeing me kinda person sweet loving and caring and nice to make me like em we are sensitive deep inside we never show it cause that power we have we are really really mentaly tuff attitude
dont get fooled tho i just cannot show weakness i gotta be he strongest out everybody cause thats pride but im really really caring but all alone im more intouch with my feelings…i think im complicated..people dont think but i doo in a way cause all the stuff that we keep inside is very deep n we feel like damn who sees the world like i doo hats why i feel misunderstood sometimes thats why we dont show ourselfes completely trust is the number one thing in my life when it comes to relationship cause you finally find a girl that you like and they doo you wrong and we dont like that our strong side wont have it..my attitude is like idc whaty people think im happy i dont fit in im happy i stand out be your own man that powerful side keeps me up when im feelin misunderstood..and i be like ok one day ill find someone who really understands me and wont leave me…all we want is loyalty and affection deep inside..and ill never stop until i meet someone who has potential enough..thats just our love life..but our friendship if you show loyalty and get my back ill get your back to the fullest..you aint gotta date a scorpio and you can hate him..but when it comes to love and you have a scorpio you should be happy he around you cause they wont play games if they love you then get ready to go deep deep deep deep deep in love… dont fool with him cause youll never get him back ther goes are pride again..lol..we are mirrors and have diffrent personalitys depends how you present yourself i could be funny,intense,calm,serious,loving.caring,like a mirrior cause i wont judge you ill accpet you how you really are be yourseld i respect that just be loyal or they will dissapear without saying a word..we scorpios are fuckin mysterious in every way i like that tho..cause it will alway have you thinkin about me..not in a mean way tho..all i gotta say is if you wanna date a scorpio go ahead if you dont dont..dont judge we aint cruel we aint hurting you guys..we just a big ol ????????????????.
awww…scorpio 18…that was so sweet. N’ I’m reading all of the post here and I’m actually agreeing with everyone. Love takes you to a many a places…n’ love with a scorpio will take you to Hell till you’re on ur knees beggin’ God to lift you. Trust…I know…my husband, whom I am currently seperated from, is a scorpio. Every single description fits him to a T. I’m a libra so…yeah. I didn’t research our compatibility beforehand so I’m just drowning in it. But I can say one thing…they are loyal and the most loving.N they will most definitely drive you NUTS! But when loving them or ne man for that matter but especially them…Remember they are there to help make you stronger.Don’t let them break you down.Love them till it hurts n’ it always will, but love urself till you can’t anymore. He’ll respect you so much more.
For the woman in his life. Bonding deeply and meaningfully with another is paramount to this mans happiness. Allowing another to know him and his soft side is what needs to be done and therein lies the problem. Being so outwardly tough and concerned with power and then realizing the obstacles that creates to intimacy are a dilemma he knows too well. . He is naturally secretive and can show suspicion even after many experiences of love and devotion from his mate. The reason being that he has experienced the rug pulled out from under him and he suffered greatly. For him, to trust the one he loves is a great work indeed and the key to living his life fully and well. Ultimately he is the one who must be that trusted committed partner which he is looking for in another. Once he is able to transform himself so will his relationships do likewise.
So right, James. I’m Aries woman. Never, ever met anyone like the Scorpio I now know and love. I’m wondering though; in our case I am sad that he may not trust himself enough to soar in this relationship. For the first time I’ve met my match in all the right ways. We both know it but at this point only I believe it. Wish us well…
I am Nov 5. Scorpions are all human. The bottom line is how scorpion are you?
Hi all! Wow,I haven’t posted on here since November 4th.Well, he’s back,at least for the time being.He’s coming to nursery school next Tuesday and wants to spend the night with me in a few weeks. This is new!! He’s coming on full force again even more than before actually and I’m pretty shocked!But it’s hot,hot,hot and I’ve decided just to have fun with it and not pressure him. I saw him a couple of weeks ago spur of the moment and it was incredible!I think what some of you ladies said one here about living your life and going about your day without making contact is great advice!Gotta throw him off and make him wonder a little!And I know from what he told me recently after his basically four month absence,that he’s been thinking about me and what we did together. So just know that it’s not necessarily out of sight out of mind!And I still can not believe the passion and sensuality this man possesses-he’s 25-it astounds me!I mean I’m 45, and he is the most amazing man I’ve ever been with hands down!!I am however trying very hard to take it all with a grain of salt.HA HA. So, ladies,whats new with all of you? Lets have some updates. This is a great site. Lets keep it going!TTYL 🙂
tell me what you ladies like about scorpios
like what is it about him that you like or love..i wanna know everything
i love you all
Hey, guys. I just wanted to say something in reply to the scorpio guy, who doesn’t call his girl back, for fear he might be misunderstood…do you think about where things are going? (And not in a sense you can’t handle it…scorpios really Are geared for love) do you worry if you get more serious, you will hurt her? See, scorpions don’t play games…they don’t run hot and cold. They only know one temperature – smoldering hot. The “coldness” some of you ladies have seen is merely them surrounding themselves with that impenetrable wall…probing into a scorpio’s inner feelings is like scraping concrete with a plastic spoon. They will only ever reveal as much as they choose, and if you are in a relationship with one, you better start getting used to it. That’s precisely what it felt like with my scorpio at first. (Now an ex, technically and practically) Anyway, I was getting at the fact that a scorpio would keep you at an arms’ length for his own reasons, often because he is trying to protect you, either from himself or some other unforseen obstacle he himself sees, but NEVER to boost his ego, or prove he is a player. These men don’t need reassurance, they know they are superior. (And unless they are an unevolved specimen, they are)…just notice that supreme, quiet, dignified confidence and unshakable glare a scorpio has in the midst of everyone else in a crowd. Scorpios in general are very devoted and they look faaaar down the line, when they get into a love afair. They worry senseless, although you will never see this on his stone face. They feel deeply, but it takes a very patient woman, who truly understands them in order for them to let themselves open up to her. But ladies, trust me…once you really open the floodgates of his love (not a mere affection), he could really drown you in love. And yes, they are very demanding, sometimes cruel for their own reasons and love with them can feel very emotionally draining…but again the catch is in truly understanding this man. Not many girls manage that, as they are used to the more mellow, compromising sun signs. If you are getting yourself into a love affair with a scorpio, be prepared to be an open book…they will figure out what’s in the darkest corners of your soul before you even know it. You would have to have high morals and be a good citizen in order to win their respect. Honesty is a BIG thing for them…a scorpion may forgive an occasional slip up, but he will never forgive you a lie. You may even be surprised at how gentle he can be and protect those weaker than him. By this I don’t mean you should be a crying mess…remember, if you want to keep this man you will have to win his respect. But if you do let your guard down on occasion and confide your fear or uncertainty to him, he will give you wings you couldn’t have hoped for. Scorpio men are also very honest. You will not catch them sneaking behind your back or misleading you. Also forget about emotional demands and ultimatums…these women tricks don’t work on these men. Never ever give him any reason to be jealous. If you try to make him jealous hoping to get more attention from him, it will only have the opposite effect. Remember these men are very powerful. If there is a good reason for the relationship to end, a scorpion will remain silent even though burning inside.
All in all, your best bet, I think, would be to get to know each other first (they may get in a relationship, but will seldom choose a partner for life, if slept on the first date. I am not saying that’s impossible), be straight and honest and be clear about what you want. Be someone, who holds their stance, he will respect you for it…although, be prepared for compromising when you clash with him, with him things really either go his way or not at all. You may help shape his ideas, but the ultimate decision will be his. Never fool yourself into believing you have control over him. You will be the most precious thing in his life he will fiercely protect and love, but he alone is a master of himself. Extremely intuitive. Loves being in long term relationships. Has a deep emotional need to connect with a lover and if he really chooses you, he will throw himself into building this relationship. You will have to be the one to live up to his high standards. I’ve forgotten what else I wanted to say…I am here in my bed missing my man and this is how I got on this site. In conclusion, once a scorpio has loved and cared for you, he will always have love in his heart for you, long after the romantic love has gone. Some of you may notice some scorpios often talk and are still friends with their exes. This is a rare marvellous man, who may bruise you, but will always be brutally honest, and can show you highs you only dream about. It will be up to you to get and keep him.
this so true
yup, totally true what is said up there… i totally agee with it! seriously….
i’m a scorpio girl birthday on 12 nov currently hook up with a scorpio man birthday on 6 nov..
it’s like what is said up there, totally 100% him… it was like i’m gonna kill my self in early relationship with him… he’s really challenging my scorpio nature!
but with help moon and love sign that is well compliment, we work out together being most happy couple around!
just be patient with scorp guys especially for scorp women out there that is hook up with scorp guy!
good luck!
ok…i have an issue..hope someone can help! ive been conversing with a scorpio guy for about 4 yrs. he lives in another state so we never see eachother..only through pictures..and we visit eachother a few times…no sex never had sex!! just last year he started to tell me that he loves me but his actions started to change…no calls..nomore long talks…attitude..snappy etc. however when i started dating someone else and i told him…he got extreeemly upset!! told me to take care and cursed me real bad,and now 3 days later, he changes his phone number! im so hurt and confused…he act as if he dosent like me…even when i would bring up the possibility of us commiting..he would say “sounds ok” but then i dont hear from him…i felt that he wasnt interested but he didnt want to hurt me…now he pulls this?!!! is this a cop out for him to get me out of his life or is he really hurt that im seeing someone? please respond with youre input thanks.
My husband is a very sexy, very loving Scorpio man. Incredible man, amazing dad, handle with caution though…. I was a feminist till I met him. I’m hooked on man power now I adore him. People don’t understand him generally, but I do.
Scorpio men can make the most fantastic husbands and fathers. 12 yrs of fun and counting.
I’m Pisces by the way
Well I have been on here reading for the past hour of everyone’s posts. I too am seeing a Scorpio man. We have been seeing each other for a little over a month. Just recently we finally spent one night together and had great sex then he had to leave the next morning to his home state for a funeral. He gave me like three different phone numbers to reach him at while he was gone and said he would call me. I heard from him the same night he got in and we talked for like an hour then he said he was tired and would call me the next day. Well its now been four days and I have tried to call him once. When I did and got him on the phone he said he was kind of busy and would call me back but never did. I of course became very hurt by this reaction. But being the LEO I am and I am very aggressive I did not call him back and haven’t yet. I have a very strong side to me too and I will not let him think he is running shit. If he doesn’t want to call me then fine I am not sitting around driving myself crazy for him. But you can best believe when he finally does call me back I will right back in his arms again. I don’t know why exactly though just some kind of hold he keeps on me. I will not push nothing on him and I can be good at this because I am a LEO and I too think I deserve all the attention because of my zodiac so his on and off again torture doesn’t sting me too badly. Us Leo’s are a very social being and I can find many things to do to keep from driving myself crazy about this Scorpio. I have a Scorpio daughter myself so I know all too well how to handle these creatures…so to speak…Its all good though I just know when I am in his arms nothing else in the world matters to me and if he needs his space then he can have it as long as I can have him again when he comes back. I also let him know I am here for him when he needs me so maybe that helps. When I talked to him on the phone and he was busy I just simply said to him OK I am here if you need me for anything and he thanked me. So that’s it. If he calls me he calls me if he doesn’t I have no problem moving forward.
I had to reply to you…i am a leo and in love with a scorpio male..I have been battling the emotions for over a year…hot cold and then total passion, its been great to read these comments..because i feel like i have been going crazy!!! I have sobbed crying like never before over any man…when he pulls back with the emotions. Its all about exercising patience..so true when you say you will be there for them..they go off on their merry way…you envisage them happily skipping through their life…while you sit there…crying… well i can only describe it as grieving actually,like you have lost the most important thing in your life… but bottom line i love him…warts and all…however i am still trying to learn the art of switching off…getting on with my life and knowing that he WILL come back. Its been over a year…we have built up a very very strong connection. He is honest as they come, it will take him a while to pluck up the courage to tell me…but he does, i respect him and he respects me (although i doubt it a lot during the hot and cold phase)
you just got to ride the storm when it comes to love…live your life (try your best, i am learning)if the respect and love is there, he’ll be back. This time the hot and cold phase is because i didnt do something he asked, straight away…i started to reclaim power, he didnt like it, he left, he opened too much and then he backed off…plain and simple…i could write a book…maybe i will!!! Read Linda goodmans suns signs….its all there, i won him through it…its just trying to work a completely different way to anyone before…don’t play games, dont lie, certainly dont tell him you have others ( although dont lie either, he will know) remain pure….and only for him!!! tough call eh!!!
So Leonine,
Tell me what you didn’t do that he asked you to do?
Was it a small thing or was it something significant?
Please share with us.
Curious Puppy… from Pluto.
This is crazy. I just need an honest answer. I met this scorpio guy about a month ago and i just liked him. He’s 5 years older than me, single, funny and really charming. We went out for drinks with another friend and had a very nice conversation abt politics later. All around this time I felt some awkwardness, like when we were hugging (it was New Year’s Eve) there was that weird i-hope-this-doesn’t-mean-more-than-it-is feeling lol. Otherwise we had a great time, we reached a place where there was music being played and people dancing in the open and he asked me for a dance. Before that he had offered to pick me up (and went out of his way to explain that he was doing this coz the cabs would be hard to get) Anyway, after that night it was practically silent. i would text him 2 casually check on him and he would reply- sometimes a day later with a pretty gud message. The texts (both from me and him) were really impersonal and so after a while i sort of gave up. a few days back he called me out of the blue just before i was going 2 bed (10 pm) and asked me if i wanted to join him for dinner. He picked me up and we went to this place where we ate the first tym and he apologized profusely and promised that “next time we’ll go to another place” we talked throughout dinner, he ordered my food and we had a great tym. (i know i did) he stared at my face the whole tym… he then took me home and said he really enjoyed the nyt and that “we should definately hang out more”. He didn’t kiss me (or touch me.lol). He got called back to work after our dinner and we chatted on the phone for the whole nyt and we had a casual phone call when i woke up that morning (I called him). Since then we’ve been chatting online a bit more often and i feel that he let me in slightly deeper than before. (i cud be imagining it) . All i need to know is whether he likes me. Should i invite him for like a movie and see wat he says. iv been ignoring him for d past day (it’s HARD! Cancer women fall hard) lol and he has not really said anything either. Anyway, i just wanna know if i shud wait for him or not waste my tym and move on.
I sent him some work for him to critique (I wish i had read this post before i did) He practically corrected EVERYTHING- which is a gud thing (means he actually read it word for word) But he did say the piece had potential, i jst had 2 work on it a bit more.
Should I make a move? Tell him how I feel? This is eating me up. 😦
Hey guys! I went yesterday on a date with a Scorpio, had a great time, and he showed me all the positive signals that he’s interested. He was a gentleman and was making the best efford to make me have a good time. It is the first time I date a Scorpio man so I didn’t know what to expect..Well since yesterday he hasn’t called or text, its like he disappeared and I was moody all day waiting for him to call..there’s something about him that really drowns me to get to know him more. We didn’t kiss or anything yet. I was feeling sorry for myself all day, determined that he is not interested, and I ended up on this site trying to figure out about this man. Well I feel a lot better now and Iam even certain he will eventually contact me..I’ll just be patient!! All comments and descriptions here definitely made me chance my point of view! Well I hope he does call!! I’ve only seen him twice and Iam already obsessed with him even though I haven’t show it. Iam a Pisces bytheway! xx
I am Scorpio, I accidentally find this site a month ago and have read every thing said in the forum, it is very interesting…I keep coming to see if there is any additional things are being said about “me”(in case there is something I could help and finding myself in process)
It’s all true that we are cold and very sweet when we come out our shells.
One advise that I want to give out is that do not do any thing to make the cold much colder, it will not help you…but only giving him his space and assure him that you are his sincerely(not until it seems it fake, he hate superficial emotions). Only if you could do this that you will be rewarded with full-force of love when he comes out his shell.
Be natural and simple, take the lead once in a while, call him and ask him how he is doing. It is true that he want to be in control of the situation around him, but with same token he does not like a woman who does not take the initiative, who sits around waiting for him to make the calls.
Cheers
You all have very good perceptions of him. However, your Scorpio guy is very much like a glacier. What you see on the surface is only a fraction of what really exists beneath his surface. I am what you might call a classic Scorpio. Age 34 Nov 19. Are we profound?… maybe, depends on our growth. If we know who we are not, our egos are healthy and total. My outward energies may be perceived by all of you as hot and cold, but really if you ladies understood the psychological pressure of handling deep volcanic emotion, you too would be unpredictable. Generally speaking, our outside practical reality does not stimulate us to greatness. Our desires and “motives” (hopefully good and honorable) do. I can size up any weakness in other person and feel and “know” another persons core intentions in about 30 seconds. But now evolved, I choose to find the goodness and virtue in others, even my enemies. Thanks to evolutionary changes within (yes, intense sex is a transcendent vehicle for our souls and psyche) Strong arms are nothing without a strong heart. Thanks, and be well.
My husband is a Scorpio and he’s the greatest guy in the world!!! Be prepared though to do the cooking, cleaning etc. and generally look after him as this is what he’s looking for, oh and be prepared to do as your told at times in times of conflict. He has always treated me like his queen though and makes me feel very loved, sex has always been amazing and I know my happiness is really important to him. I am very much though ‘his’… this type of man will never fall in love with a feminist. He makes me feel very valuable though, i know he’d die for me.
i’m a pisces btw. My advice to other girls is dont insult him, don’t play games with him, try and be logical when your arguing and listen carefully to what he has to say. Show him old fashioned respect.
If you hurt his feelings he may well say things he doesn’t mean or even dissapear on you as he is a VERY proud person and bruises easily. Try and be VERY forgiving as he will often say things he doesnt mean when he’s hurt as he hurts deeply and will often attack you sometimes verbally, sometimes weeks later after you made him angry as things brood in him. He knows he needs a saint and if that’s you he will love you deeply once he can trust you and you take on board any of his criticisms of you. Hope my advice helps, Good luck!
wow sounds a scorpio guy is a very abusive guy lol :)who cares about the zodiac sign? a guy needs to grow up and stop acting like a spoiled brat. The description of scorpios can also be paralleled to d description of sociopaths cum egocentered freaks lol CIAO! be safe ladies let REASON RULE U ladies and not so much PASSION
My best mate is a Scorpio. I tell you its weird reading this page, wow, im confused because its all true….but….how can this be so accurate?? Planets influence personality?? I think there might be a God now people….seriously confused.
Scorpio men mix passion with great intellect and reason….. I split from mine as I was young and felt suffocated…. but I miss him still. They are a real rarity, Scorpio men are ALWAYS fascinating because they’re deep people but guarded.
yeah. i love my scorp guy. me gemini.helplessly drowned to him. i think i jz attached to him forever. jz give him much time..wud probably make me uncertained.
Hello everyone, I have enjoyed reading your guys’ blogs. I am going on a date with a Scorpio…. i am very excited but need some tips. I will be his first date since he and his x had broken up about 6 month ago. They were married for about 5 years. I want to make the best impression. I am a Capricorn so….i need to be prepared!!!! LOL Thanks!
Heather, I read about your advise and I was in a suitation with a Scoripo man which I need your advise. Please drop me a note at my email at
low_wanda@yahoo.com.sg
so I can discuss with you personally. I think base on your experience, you should be able to help me. Thanls.
Well, I am a Libra and I just met a scorpio man.
For sex, I think he is having the best of his time with me. He kept telling me how great some of his ex was but when we finally do it, I think I blow him away and he still have a lot to catch up (from my standard) and I am still teaching him.
Even for my Scoripo girlfriend who present herself to be so sexy & hot & so wanted by all her men, but her sex knowledge is like ten years old. For sure I do not tell her that to hurt her but give her tips here and there. The amazing part is I will go shopping with all my other girlfriends and we will share on make up tips, but this scorpio girlfriend will be so proud to share or ask, yet lazy to read, and what she do is to check what I have in my cosmetic bag, and then buy the same stuff… what is all these copy cat and pride all about?
Hi everyone,
I have been reading all the threads and I really need your help.
I met a scorpio guy online because I was moving to a new country and I wanted to meet new people. We started chating and it was amazing – its like I had found my soulmate and we both were truly excited about each other. The chating turned into text messages and then calls so we decided to meet up. I went to visit him and we felt so close – it was beautiful, innocent, intense and passionate. We would finish each others sentences and tell each other that we were so lucky we had met. People even thought we were brother and sister the way we were so alike and in sync. The day I left to go home he had an accident and broke his leg on exactly the same place as I had two years before, on the same month. It was truly bizarre and I was so scared for him. He even asked if I thought that meant true love or destiny. We stayed in touch every day and he thanked me for my help and dedication. Of course I went to visit him as soon as he left the hospital and we spent another amazing weekend. He asked me where we stood and we decided to start a relationship. That week, however, I became jealous of a female colleague of his because it seemed to me she was trying to win him over and as he doesnt speak about us to anyone except his family. I am very open so I mentioned it to him. Two days later I tried to call and he did not answer so of course I worried given his condition. He just replied that I shouldnt worry – he just had his mobile on silent. And he asked me not to worry so much and that he had never had anyone that felt so strongly about him. The next day I told him I would call in the evening and we agreed on the time. This colleague was going to visit that night but I was ok with it. Then I rang and his phone was off. The next day I was obviously angry so we discussed things for an hour. That night I got drunk, however, and I tried to make him jealous online. After that we would still reply to my messages but not the phone and after that silence so I sent him an email to which he replied a day later and apologized for the delay. He hurt me so much telling me that he felt I was being clingy and partially obsessive and that he could be paranoid sometimes as well but that it was all in the head. He also told me that he freaked out of fear of losing his independence and that it seemed I was trying to win him over with presents last time I visited and that it seemed I liked him more than he did me and even though he really did like me he needed space and that if he did not seriously think about me every single day did not mean he did not like me. He finished saying that he had always been very cautious about personal relationships and that he did not want to hurt me but I had to know how he felt and that he could do that because even though we were still strangers we felt really comfortable with each other. I replied to his email on a positive note 3 days later and sent him a text 3 days after that but no word of him.
What should I do? Can I even do anything? I want to at least clear the air. He hasnt blocked me online – he just doesnt go online very much anymore as though he is trying to avoid me… I feel so hurt and ignored but I have to respect his decision…
ooow my goddd i also met a scorpio online at first e was sooooow in love wiz me gave me all the attention he wanted to talk to me everyday see me everyday that i just wanted space but afetr a while he didnt show up for days now he says i cant talk to you everyday and that like he lost his interist in me all scorpios are the smae the smae trics ooow my godddddddddddddd i hate scorpio but how can i love them so much im 9 monthe sin love oow my goddd what a problem
well so its clear i got the same problem wiz scorpio that after a while dont call you back and that but know i think im clver i just do the same things like him . if he dont call after i send him a messeage i will do that to him too. by the way im capricorn like they say he just has to listen to my breath and feel what i feel and he does feel it . and we soooow not good show are vulnerbility and emotion no i dont do that.but he also attacked me verbaly and said motherfukcer blabla and that very not imegour. he is exacly the same as my fucking scorpio. its all about revengeee. he wanted to make me jelous wiz other girl . he say to the ugliest girls you are the most beautiful girl. its like he just wants sex . i know that they do it because they got strong feelig maybe i think for you but its frusterig. i need to talk to him . awanna talk wiz him he dont give me the time . if i send a email of call busy or dont replay what should i do . cuz if i say why do you do that he will still do the same . so i bahve likei dont care a jack abouut anything. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA goddd i hate him hate him love him love that fuckerrrr. but just wanne know will he do that for evcer cuz if we marry maybeeeeee then hes wiz me all the time in one oplace how ill he behave then thats teh question. but jess now i can live wizout him for monthes but at first when hes began to not call me or come online was veryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy hard for me. i dint know why he does that like the blame was on me but now i know it no not my blame . just there nature they alll the same alll the same . its getting boringggg. like all the sm,ae soul in differnt body whahaha . bitches. sorry but loook alot of wamans shout for helpp are emotionlly drownded because of fucking scorpios . so emagiour soow not know whyy they do itt exacly even scoprios cant answare . whaha they dont know what they really are what they want no.
but scoprio out there that are thinking that we are poor woamns help us pleass if you can . if you know yourself good tell us why youd o it just a clue give us . is becuase you just want space . if its that then why at first you wnat to talk to her every day and see her evry day and after a while not anymore like you dont like us anymore. aaaaaaaaa helppppppppppp
I am an Aquarius girl and once dated a Scorpio guy. He is a doctor and yes, he pursued u all the way and is very confident of himself. Yet, he has an emotional side of him that I find it hard to understand. One day, while he was away in the bathroom, I checked his mobile phone msges and find out that he had many other women he was pursuing at the same time!To cut long story short, as a woman who loves challlenges, I stayed on with him even though I knew about his secrets. His weekends are mostly for me but there are times when he could not meet me and I knew he was with one of the women. The final test came when I was away for a week holiday and came back to find him missing in action, I texted him twice and he never replied. I was not angry, because I knew he was having fun with other women, so I was doing my own stuff and enjoying myself with my other dates.:)2 weeks later, he smsed me to say he wants to talk to me. We met, and he told me he was depressed about his career as a doctor compared to his peers (bankers), who are younger and are earning alot more than him…blah blah..I knew he will never “talk” to me. Luckily, his phone rang, and he refused to answer…I knew was one of the women, so I pretended to ask him why was he not picking up the call…he was silent…after making hot love with him ( he could actually eat me down there while I was having menses!!), his phone was vibrating non-stop, several missed calls and a few msges tone…this time, I pretended to be angry and demanded him to tell the truth, and he gave me that puppy look ( he could not say it out at all). So after trying to get him talk and he still kept silent, I asked him,” Say, if you are my father, what would u advise me about you?” His immediate answer was, “Stay away from me!” I looked at him and tell him, “Don’t hold me back this time, I am leaving you.” I left and never contact him anymore. Scorpio man is very charming because they can say all the nice things in the world in order to control you. Too bad, I am too practical and I look at facts. Maybe, if you girls have a chance, do check his mobile phone, and I believe, you may know more about your scorpio guys without much questionings anymore. No more scorpio man for me anymore.:D
Never say never, you are hooked! At least most of your thought will be dominated by him for the rest of your life. As Pluto Puppy said below you might be able to lure the wussy ’sweet’ guy into your world, but “wussy ’sweet’ guy” is far below the standard, after all you said that you are a woman who loves challenges, but you missed out on your X-Scorpio man.
As soon as you get deep with them they seem to back away for some odd reason. They do have trust issues, but not with you, it’s also with themselves. Scorpios do cheat. They can be loyal but they do cheat like any other man of the zodiac. I’m not saying they all do, but they do cheat. I just feel life is too short to sit around and wait for someone who knows what they want but at the same time they are sending women on an emotional roller coaster ride. It’s not right and it just ain’t cool. Remember this scorpio men……don’t think for one minute a woman is going to sit around WAITING for you to make up your mind…..we are more confused and frustrated than anything with you as to why you would act like that…Be upfront from the jump and be honest of what your looking for and let us take if from there. Don’t lead us on and then leave us with a big question mark on our forehead, like “WTF just happened here”. After I get over this one scorpio you best believe I’ll be done with them for good. This is just a big ass headache to sit here worry about WTF is going through their head. Their charming and that’s their main objective. That’s how they reel a woman in. They try to get you hooked just so they can throw you back in the water.
Singapore and Mystery. If both of you look like physically attractive Persephone daffodils, take heed… you too play girly control games with the zillions of average guys in order to take charge of the tempo and energy within him. I am a Mars and Mercury in Scorpio Male who has a deep respect for the feminine wiles you guys wield. Most guys “just don’t get it”… so please don’t blame the Scorpio Male who instinctively knows the way you utilize the power of your looks and social savvy to get your own way. I love a feisty and challenging independent woman, yet God help her if she thinks I will be the timid little boy who seeks your approval, gives you phony attention and fails miserably to respectfully take charge of the chemistry. Yes, we are suspicious of others because we innately feel the deep intentions of others. When our girlfriend decides to intentionally “prove a point” and lure other guys… she will feel the intensity of our sting. A real and trustworthy dynamic with us is defined by emotional maturity. Not by impetuous superficiality. We despise petulance and lack of grace in the woman we want to love. Our passions are boiling from within, so please don’t try to simplify why you don’t get your own way like a self-serving little brat. If we look for sex elsewhere, you are not satisfying our dominant sexual nature. If you can’t surrender your snappy whims in bed and allow us to “take you”… we will find a woman who does. Both of you are bitter because we make you feel like real women, then you blame us endlessly for taking the depth of passion away. The only blame you should internalize closely is within yourselves. Not outside of yourselves. Ask yourself if you “wanted” to understand our desires for you? And do you ask us openly why we gaze elsewhere? I believe both of you are overly self-involved creatures and you can’t handle it when we seek passion with you. That’s fine. Lure the wussy ‘sweet’ guy into your world of nothingness and let me know when you eventually become annoyed and frustrated by the feeling you experience as if you are making love to your sexually inadequate little brother. Boo.
My kinda guy right here! Brutal honesty. Love it!
*big smiles*
Singapore and Mystery-don’t listen to Pluto Puppy-he’s obviously not a woman,and has therefore never been in our shoes.I agree with Mystery 100%-BE UPFRONT ABOUT WHAT YOU’RE REALLY LOOKING FOR GUYS!!GET YOU S#*T TOGETHER AND STOP ACTING LIKE LITTLE BOYS WHO RUN AWAY AND DISAPPEAR ALL THE TIME!THEN COME BACK AND TALK TO US ABOUT HOW YOU “MAKE US FEEL LIKE REAL WOMEN”
amen pluto puppy!
i had an ex who tried desperately to get back with me…i broke up with her because she wouldnt heed my calls and pleads of me telling her i didnt like her being friends with some guy,this guy had feelings for her i even came across this guys online journal.
after i painfully broke up with her she desperately wanted to be friends with me
i declined
eventually she insulted me how her new boyfriend was more of a man than me
just cause he was a cancer
he loved to kiss ass and take shit
(cancer males love getting it in the butt)
truth is,your not 100 percent loyal to us,we withhold compassion,passion and sensuality
i heard rumors that she wanks off to my ****
and hates her self for it
if you dont like us,MOVE ON!
you know something pluto puppy
i notice that god damn thing whenever i go to the gym,and im working out and i see some cute girl
you see her doing her thing
alot of you females are full of it
you think we cant tell how you most of you dont even care how we feel about you. how attracted we get
when we find you beautiful or good looking
im almost scared to date a beautiful woman for this purpose
most of you dont even care and see us as dirty towels
im gonna date someone from my meditation temple rather than someone from the vast amount of superficiality thats available today
you see this on social sites too like myspace
“comment me”
vain,lazy people!
SHIT!
you think nothing of us past a superficial visual examination and sum as up as just that
Harmonica-perhaps the cute girls at the gym sense your nagativity.
My post was very clear about what I want and who I am. But expression here is hypocritical.
100%-BE UPFRONT ABOUT WHAT YOU’RE REALLY LOOKING FOR GUYS!!GET YOU S#*T TOGETHER AND STOP ACTING LIKE LITTLE BOYS WHO RUN AWAY AND DISAPPEAR ALL THE TIME!THEN COME BACK AND TALK TO US ABOUT HOW YOU “MAKE US FEEL LIKE REAL WOMEN”
I wouldn’t be so sure you think know who you are Nancy.
You’re a lost little lamb when it comes understanding what reaches you at a deep level. That feeling frightens the panties off you… that’s why you attract all the submissive boys who you say “don’t have their shit together”.
No. You and many other women on this blog haven’t met a mature man who is charismatic and leadership material. You’d prefer a scared Cancer, Gemini or Virgo male chasing you.
Not here brattypants.
Pluto Puppy-When you listed my quote in your last post,you neglected to list the beginning of it–Actually what I said was that I AGREED WITH MYSTERY 100%about saying that guys should be upfront about what they want from the get go.And they should be!I was not saying that YOU personally are not upfront.But,yes, as you have read here numerous times,MANY men are not upfront-as I’m sure you know.Perhaps you are correct in saying that myself, and many other women, have not met mature men who are charismatic and have leadership material.I will even go so far as to say,that at least in my case,I’d have to say that your statement is pretty accurate.However,I will also say that in your first post,you do come off as insulting to the women on here,making alot of generalized statements about us.I do hope we can clear the air on this!And,hey,having my panties frightened off sounds intriguing-truly!
im negative from all the bullshit and immaturity
but i aint a negative person
it merely pisses me off how you women too play games
quite frankly its like its a crime having balls these days
a scorpio is all or nothing
and all your games sometimes turn me to the “your all full of it” switch
but dont get me wrong i have faith in finding a loving partner someone to share my love sunrises and the ocean with
someone wholl smile with me all the time and me not catching her having these “guy friends”that like her all these sub clauses i gotta work with
SCORPIOS dont play games
were all or nothing hence your liable to feel we are evil bastards
the passion,or undying devotion has a flip side,and you nancy have seen it.
i contemplate being single alot of the times
i have other goals in life
right now though there is too much immaturity and chic’ness out there
guys dont be afraid to sound like you got a pair,a female with lots of guys friends is unacceptable and unnatural
its as simple as this
i bring the food im the guardian of the cave
i dont need her talking to metro sexuals while im gone doing lord knows what!
Well the truth hurts Nancy…don’t feel insulted… feel intrigued. Oh wait?… you ARE intrigued, Lol.
You see, you’re way too accustomed and comfortable being in control of the dynamic. That wily attitude will soon stop the moment you’ve felt a real gut level sexual tension with a man. You won’t be in control then… will you?
Off fly those panties.
You haven’t encountered a strong yet KIND individual yet have you? Betta get used to it Miss, the long awaited challenge you’ve been yearning for is only a limitation of the males you meet. You and all the girls on this blog are lousy at picking authentic and self-assured men.
Because if i really wanted to… your laced panties will be on my bedroom floor tomorrow… and not to mention your bra hanging from the ceiling fan.
You couldn’t handle the intensity if it penetrated you. You’re simply not in the Male Scorpio league.
lol, you are right pluto puppy..it’s the best most thrilling feeling when there is animal attraction between too people. It’s so powerful, with just one look we know exactly whats gonna happen next… sexy scorpio has that intensity.
yup,theyve been bad girls
all of em..
Pluto Puppy-I definitely could handle the intensity-you have no idea!Bra hanging from the ceiling fan?WOW!! So,where do you live?
Harmonica- Just letting you know,I,and probably alot of the other women on here do not play games,But I can really only speak for myself.Love,sunrises and the ocean sound really good right about now!
In case you haven’t noticed we are also mysterious and private lads?
Sharing our heated rendezvous with the international public isn’t very private is it?… Well…
I live in………………………… the house behind your neighbor. LoL.
L.A
and you?
we all play games subconsciously
but if theres any reason a scorpio cuts you out of his life is because you couldnt make the same sacrifices for him
my ex wouldnt have liked me talking to my other ex
she did just that
her ex was clearly flirting with her
and her being a sag’ just made me angry all too well
she wrecked my car at some point
we scorpios aint heartless we will give you chances because we do care and want to believe in your grace
but she let me down
letting her ex and not to mention other guys commenting on her pics in a obviously sexual way
its disrespectful to me
i told her it was a lack of respect to me as a man
i want someone wholl stick with me 100 percent to say “to hell with the rest of the world,its just you and me”
other wise i see myself stronger with just that.myself.
i let her go
a scorpions power comes from letting go and letting new opportunities come in
were not bad people
but when you gals cant convince us that our faith in your grace is justified it hurts and we leave.
peace
but its perfectly alright for the scorpio man to leave comments of a sexual nature on some random females pics??? and then even with the proof slaping them in the face they still have the balls to deniy it!!!! sorry im a bit bitter about wasting 7 months of my life on a scorpio that i did nothing but support and love from the bottom of my heart….only to have him do this exact shit to me….
-libra
Hi Libra,
“sorry im a bit bitter about wasting 7 months of my life on a scorpio that i did nothing but support and love from the bottom of my heart….only to have him do this exact shit to me….”
Bitterness….not so good. So, you loved him from the bottom of your heart, but did not include loving yourself while in the relationship?
Did you love him from the bottom of your soul? If those were your true intentions, then the universe would have helped you balance out those scales to feeling the strength in a heart of connected to your own sprituality.
Pluto Puppy-it’s not like I’m asking for your address-LOL- NY here-more specifically Long Island, And,if you should decide that you might enjoy conversing off of this site,my email is listed in one of my earlier posts-just saying.
I actually am a very nice person. 🙂
Wow Harmonica-I’d have to say that I agree with everything you just said-seriously.EXCEPT about him cutting me out of his life,which he hasn’t exactly done-hence my earlier comments about getting your S#*T together etc.Nor have I cut him out,which I very likely should do… but it’s a long story-LOL.I’m a Cancer by the way.Not that anyone asked,but its supposed to be the hottest match with a Scorpio.
i think i did read part of your story
scorpios do have that effect on people
one person in my life who nearly did me in was a scorpio…female
fell for her hard took me a year to accept she wasnt coming back
to this day i dont think about her
shes just a vague memory
but i dare not try to bring any nostalgia back about her
i think after that i wasnt the same
ill never give myself so eaisly
but i have to give myself SOMETIME
i dont want to be alone my whole life
i just think its wise that i become financialy stable first
so at the very least i have something else to offer to somebody
i have big dreams big goals
and me as a scorpio wont let anybody or anything slow me down to the pie in the sky
Hey Harmonica-I totally get what you’re saying-I understand it very well.She must have hurt you pretty badly.I feel like no other guy can compare to the Scorpio I speak of on here.It’s the whole package-the energy,sense of humor,passion-both in the sexual sense as well as passion for life and his job,spontanety,and…he’s the best kisser ever LOL.UGH it drives me crazy!We have a great time together and then he disappears.Well, not completely-he doesn’t block me online.But,doesn’t respond to texts or IMs-except on rare occasion,and I barely ever(maybe once every month and a half or so,if that) text or IM him.I DO NOT call him.He actually answered an IM yesterday,much to my surprise.The last couple of times I saw him were basically late night booty calls,and it bothers me that it’s come to that from where we began last June.Back then I never would have peggged him to be this way.Why would he,when we’re saying goodbye after seeing each other,without me saying or asking anything,say he’ll call to make plans for the next week-literally saying “I promise”completely unprovoked by me????And then ,of course, I don’t hear from him.And,from day one,a year ago,when we’re together,he always talks about all the things we’ll do(including sleepovers) together and how awesome it will be.I DO NOT GET IT!!That’s what I meant by “be upfront about what you really wany guys”.I mean, I guess by this point he’s made it pretty clear what he wants-an occasional “whatever” when the mood strikes him.And,when he wants me,he comes on SO STRONG-like relentless!OK Harmonica-I really want your take on this!Not only are you a guy,but a Scorpio too-this is perfect!
well ive been hearing about this behavior for other scorpio males…you know going MIA
i wouldnt do that
youd have to find out his moon sign in such for me to give you a better picture
my moon is in taurus so im pretty much marriage oriented
in the long run of course id prefer long term than a superficial one night stand
you gotta find out whats up with this guy
maybe his job is really important to him
ill tell you WHAT NOT TO DO
dont make ultimatums
try to do something extra special
like next time he comes over give him a simple note when hes about to leave short but sweet
complimenting him on his masculinity or sexual prowess
try not to be too clingy
surprise him a little but not enough to get him jealous
impress him with something personal
like some piece of art you made
take charge a little and maybe take out to the woods then tell him something you never told him before
scorpio males will respect a strong woman
but dont over do it!
haha mama mia its like defusing a bomb.
Ha ha- the bomb comment is so true! But I am probably waaaay more anylytical than I should be as well.What info do you need for his moon sign?
Analytical*
ah,dont expect this info for free
throw in a sub way sandwhich and a diet soda and you got yourself a deal!
*smokes in the shadows
i need his date of birth,town and time
actually you can do it yourself!
analyze someones birth chart for more info on how they act react etc
moon sign is the way one processes his emotions
for example,you can be a scorpio and have a moon in…gemini
youll process your feelings like a gemini even though your still a scorpio at heart
lets just say a scorpio with a moon in gemini is likely to do the grudge thing
Harmonica and Puppy Pluto..Let me explain something to you..I believe in relationships being 50/50. I’m not a spoiled bratt nor do I wish to control the relationship. I had a bad experience with a scorpio and what I stated previously on here is what happened to me that’s all. Harmonica I agree with you 100% that you should not try and make your mate jealous by parading other men around I totally feel the same way. I’m not conceited but yes I am a very attractive woman, but that’s not what men like about me…my personality is what they admire most. Far as the bedroom puppy pluto, I make no mistakes in that department. I am very sure of my self when it comes to that. Anyway I’m not responding to make a fight I just need some suggestions from you men. You don’t have to get defensive.
so whats your story mystery?
whos the scorpio who nearly did you in??
*sips coffe
By the way Harmonica thanks for your input in your previous comment….those were some good points.
Well I like to keep it confidential on here but if you have an email address I would be more than happy to share.
scorpios dont really like giving out they’re addresses
but because my Sagittarius rising is kicking in what the hell
pinkfloyd5321@sbcglobal.net
porn spams and buisness emails…here they come…hehe
Actually it’s ok Harmonica. The story that you shared is about 85% of what I went through with this guy. The thing is, is that he don’t want to let me go….I leave him alone and he calls and text. Not saying that I’m egging him on..I’m just confused as to why you would keep holding on to someone,but yet your scared of commitment or you have trust issues. I don’t know. I’m not about the games. I’m not an easy woman at all. You tell me to leave you alone….I leave you alone…I don’t go off doing psycho sh*t. Not worth it. I have my own head I know how to say no and yes depending on the conversation and give my opinions. When somethings on my mind I state them….he on the other hand can’t handle that…I’m very calm when I talk I don’t make a seen, however when I have something to say I always look the man staight in his eye and mean exactly what I’m saying to him….so they know that I do not want them to take what I am saying lightly, especially if I was bothered by something he did.
did he say you did something??whats your sign??that might give further clues
does he have career goals?
Mystery.
No defensive stance here … just innate male Scorpio passion. If we can’t speak our truth we are only betraying ourselves.
And yes, compromise is essential. My experience with the female Scorpio is she loves a servant, a guy who is thoughtful… but also a doormat. She wants full dominion of everything and has super trust issues.
Being a male Scorpio… I believe a female Scorpio developing a real partnership/connection is a risk far too psychologically great for her. She needs total control.
I am a capricorn. He does have career goals. He’s in the service and will be retiring from there. Puppy-pluto I am so not that woman your referring to..and I know your not saying I am. I am in the Vegas area by the way.
Harmonica. No he didn’t say I did anything..he said it’s him…lol
Mystery,
My moon is Capricorn. and where’s your Moon and Mars?
well if i was in his shoes id get that down first
surely,youd like him to provide for you right?thats how i feel about my career goals
no matter how cute a girl i encounter out there i dont feel good enough for her until i can provide for her properly
my moon is in taurus and i like it there
my mars is in aquarius and i like that one too subservent detached,they cant see where ill come from! >_>
oh…i thought that question was directed at me…ooops.
I’m not sure what my moon sign is..not good with that but my birthday is jan 9th
Mystery- If you want me to read you an overview of your chart, feel free to email me your birth info.
– time of birth
– date of birth
– city and country of birth.
plutopuppy33@yahoo.com
Hi pluto…M y scorpio is 35… 11/19.. Born in ohio not sure of time.. We hooked up and he is gorgeous but says hes not a plyr… But he only texts and calls every blue moon or i think when he wants me..he told me he works a very demanding job and have no time to call chicks all the time so i dnt call but text every blue… He then says im the plyr and i seems to get to things when i feel like it. When we hooked up we didnt use protection and he says i wnt catch anything from him hes clean and showed me his recent dr report… But if he dnt want anything serious why unprotected?.. He says he dnt sleep around..??….when were in bed he is so passionate and attentive but then he rearly calls… ????… Last time we were together i told him i went to a party over the holiday.. He was away.. He says i knew it…… Then were sexin and he looks do deep in my eyes and then he smiles and shakes his head like he cant believe something.. I say whats wrong he says nothing…?????… Then he asks me what im thinkin all the time…. tell me if i am just a bootycall or if he cares even the
slight… Im libra 9/23… 39…. Thnkx pluto
I don’t see your question?
So you’ve screwed, he’s not calling or texting you, and you want me to tell you why he doesn’t want anything serious with you??. LoL
Ask him. Not me.
Sounds to me like a dynamic full of control games and material Capricorn deceit.
Best regards;)
Far as him providing for me? I’m sure that’s what everyone woman wants, but I have always seen a relationship 50/50. I do believe in letting a man be a man and letting them have some sort of control, but only of certain situations, of course I wouldn’t give an ok to everything he suggest because I would be lying to myself and him.
pluto puppy my email is down right now that’s one of the reason I couldn’t email Harmonica, but I was born 1/9/78 at 6am in the morning in panorama city, ca.
hmmm
so do you still want in with him?
You know what we still talk. And I ask myself do I want to keep putting up with this. Easier said then done. His actions show that he cares about me…..but I don’t like the friend status. We been seeing each other for some time and I know he likes me I just don’t know what I want to do. I do know that eventually I’ll get tired of the situation. It seems to me Harmonica…..when we get to close he backs away.
*nods
*thinks
This should be easy to answer for you scorps…:-)
Wow this is getting interesting!!I might email you Harmonica-if that’s OK with you??
By the way,Subway sandwich and diet soda-you got it! 🙂
haha go ahead
Mystery-Are you the one I’ve been emailing with?
ahhh my bouncy sagitarrius rising is kicking in…hey everyone Look at this,its funny!
No I’m afraid not.
hmm sorry you dont share my sense of humor
ah scorpios,the ones who pick up on the unspoken
Very funny video-my 10 yr old son would love it
nov.14 scorpio
Hey,where did everyone go??Lets talk 🙂
im right here girl
Me- Pisces, Him- Scorpio.
Not really looking for advice, trust me I’ve done everything possible to make this work. Just merely offering yet another tale of intrigue.
Not only is this the most helpful site I’ve ever been on when it concerns my Scorpio drama, but it’s been a long hard read of myself as well.
Being the typical chamelon/doormat Pisces that I am, I couldn’t help but adapt my entire life to my Scorpio. And I love it, don’t get me wrong. I changed nearly everything mentally and physically possible, just to suit his needs. Now comes the waiting. LOL
It’s only been since April this year, but not surprisingly to the rest of you, this might be a long read.
We met, instantly clicked. I’ll skip the nasty details of my previous relationship, but it ended soon after meeting this guy. And he came and picked myself and my one year old son up, packed my stuff, and moved me in with him, and his 10 year old daughter. 9 days after said meeting. 🙂 Typical all or nothing, balls to the wall, crazy/logical Scorpio.
Everything was beautiful, as usual. But of course, not too soon after we got our house (2 weeks later), it got scary for him I suppose.
Slight relationship history for him-
2 divorces. Daughter from first marriage. The usual too young to handle it marriage ended. Second marriage was a Virgo. Need I explain more? Hahaha. She treated both my Scorpio, and his daughter like second rate trash, but alas, he was in love with her. There was no turning that off for him. Until the 8th time she cheated. Then he walked away.
(And yes, I truly do understand this man’s psyche. And have been as patient as possible. 🙂 )
I am not in the least bit judgemental with him. Just frustrated, which even the most prideful of Scorpios will admit their erratic behaviours can be really rough to deal with.
Anyhow first week of August came the big “I can’t handle this, and just need to be effing single” convorsation from him. Was a huge ‘WTF’ blow for me. But still to this day, I’m surviving the stings, and swings. (Mood swings, to clarify).
Fortunatley (reasons unknown why it’s fortunate) we are still living together. But I truly believe in my heart that my total devotion to his self-employed business (his ultimate pride), and my constant upkeep of the house and his daughter, that despite what he’s trying to hide away, will eventually smooth over. I’m not saying it’ll be easy. It sure hasn’t been so far. But I’ve been in it %100 since day one. I’m not giving up on this guy. Not a damn chance. Sucks, rough, hurtful, downright depressing at times. ( I could really go back through post after post and insert copy paste situations here, but it’s not nessescary. ‘hot-cold’, moody, ignorance, jealousy, ect. Been there done that. )
But! I will probably have to finish this post sometime later tonight, for I have to count down my drawer at work.
To Be Continued…
This is a great forum and I have learned that I am one of many who are in the deep clutches of a Scorpio male. I have dated several Scorpios in my time but the current one I am seeing is the most accurate stereotype of this sign. We started seeing each other after meeting at a work event, and basically texted non stop for two weeks, sending about 3,000 messages to each other…no phone conversations though. We saw each other in person every other day for a while too. He said he was just getting out of a relationship and wasnt ready for anything serious, so I tried to be ok with that….his text messages were usually very sexually charged, and very explicit. I played along, which he loved. But he is much more timid in person so it is like dating 2 people! He hasnt taken me on a proper date yet, and this is the most infuriating part. Although I am letting myself continue this, it feels like we are just sex objects to each other. I have kinda pulled away from him, so now his texts are more platonic, and he hasnt made much effort to see me lately. I dont text tim first; the few times that I have made the first move, he seems less enthusiastic about talking. I am mad at myself for accepting less than I deserve from this man. But he can be so attentive and sweet that it is hard to let go!
Hi Harmonica!!Things are weird with my Scorpio now-well,WEIRD-ER LOL but in a good way,if that mekes sense.haha of course it makes sense-HE’S A SCORPIO!
makes*
To Abbie and Gemini73-you guys are so right-it all sounds so familiar! We need to talk!WOW!
Hi Nancy,
I been reading your posts. And I can relate to you, as I am somewhat going through what you went through.
I am glad to hear things are going well with you and your Scorpio man.
Out of curiousity, after when your Scorpio man came back in Jan 2009 did he broke it off with his ex?
lol, scr’s lets see, can be hard to deal with them you can try to take it out with them but if they don’t want to leave them,… simple because some are hard headed to change…
but they can be perfect people if know thier own weakness…
im a scorpio 🙂
I’m a Taurus who met a scorpio guy on-line (long distance)about a month ago, who travels to my city for work often. We clicked immediately, as he is very easy to talk too, great personality, sense of humor and extremely passionate in bed. As bedmates we are very intense. I’m a Taurus girl, so we are just as intense and passionate. When we are together its great and I can tell that he is genuinely interested in what I have to say. However, there is definately a slight wall there that I cannot seem to take down. Sometimes I feel as though I’m making progress, while other times I’m not. I know he likes me, but seems to feign indifference, especially when we are apart. He may call once and or text, MAYBE twice a week and it drives me crazy. I want more and I am heartsick. I’m 40 and I feel like a heart sick teenager. Any advice?
Ok.. i feel like bit of an idiot saying we’ve only met a little over a month ago, but he’s traveled to my town 3 times already for work and we spent each day and night together.. so, that is why I’m feeling so nauseated. We have a connection and I feel like when when he goes back home, its like out of sight, out of mind.. Any Taurus ladies out there that have dated Scorps?
“Hi Harmonica!!Things are weird with my Scorpio now-well,WEIRD-ER LOL but in a good way,if that mekes sense.haha of course it makes sense-HE’S A SCORPIO!”
Do tell.
Well thank the angels for this forum! I’m happy to know that I am not the only one chasing a scorpio and having feelings never felt before.
Me: I am late twenties female pisces and I met my scorpio in April on a dating site. I have been in three very long term serious relationships and have always felt in control and when they ended it was my doing and my heart has never ached for a man….until now.
The scorpio: He is early 40s, has had very little experience with long term relationships but seems to long for one. He’s very successful and independant and good at everything he does…
My tactics: I feel as though I am doing a good job keeping up the facade with this scorpio. I’ve got him calling me and emailing daily…and I keep myself busy to try not to contact him as much as I want. I see that this makes him crazy and he contacts me more. Since June he has taken me on two trips and has taken me to meet his whole family and most of his good friends. I haven’t brought him around many of mine…probably out of fear, but mostly because I feel the need to tread lightly with him in order to keep him interested.
He’s always talking about marriage and children (in a general sense…I think) and he seems to be trying to make future plans with me but I find ways to kybosh these conversations and change the subject.
My scorpio has yet to disappear and grow cold, and every moment spent with him is so intense I can barely breathe. But still, I am afraid to falter, god forbid I let him know how I really feel.
…and this is my issue. I’ve been reading about scorpio men for months and have perused many forums and articles and one thing I have noticed is that there doesn’t seem to be many people who have flown with this eagle and not crashed. This scares me. I’d like to be a typical piscean dreamer and feel as though our connection will just continue to grow and become the most amazing and life-lasting experience of all time…but how can I be so naive when all of the evidence seem to suggest that these men are here for a good time and not a long time?
I’d like to hear from some women who have successfully dated a scorpio and continue to on the long-term. I need some positive outlook here because I can’t hold out much longer.
I can keep up this facade in order to keep him interested, but why should I? Doesn’t there come a time when my walls can come down and I can let him in and tell him how I really feel without the fear of being stung by a scorpio…or any man for the first time?
I don’t like how much control he has over my emotions but I love being ‘in love’ with this man.
Just looking for some positive advice in order for me to stop playing the hot cold part of the scorpio because this is so against my piscean nature.
Thanks,
FF
I Love this Forum a lot, o Gash!
Sweet femmefatale, i will give you the best advise any body can give you shortly, I am the Scorpio Man.
Scorpion men are sooo confusing! Everything you ladies are saying is 100% correct! I’ve been dating this Scorpio guy for about 6mos now… and for the most part its been wonderfulll, if you dont include my insecurities and his sudden detachments. He is my first boyfriend, and also my first of some other things… :]
About a week ago he moved to Orlando for school, while im still in Indiana. Since his move we’ve had a deep conversation about how much we love each other and dont want to lose each other, but itll be difficult to talk because were both concentrated on school. Since this conversation, he really hasnt contacted me, or shown me any attention, and he acts as if he doesnt care. The one time that he has, hes been so cold… and eveytime since then when ive tried to txt message him, hes even colder. idk what to do… im going to try to be patient for a few more days and wait until he messages me, but im afraid that if i wait too long, he’ll think that i dont care, and i’ll lose him…? :[ help.
Hey Harmonica and T!Hi T.Sorry it has taken me so long to write back and answer your question.When he showed back up in January I have no idea if he had broken it off with her.I then saw him again in March and confronted him about his erratic behavior-why does he disappear for long periods of time etc.asking him straight out if he is engaged or married.He denied it left and right.I reminded him that he had told me earlier that they were working on things and he told me that she moved out after the holidays.JUMP IN HERE FOR THE UPDATE HARMONICA!I didn’t hear from him again until July,but since then things have been better and more consistent with him.He told me that he wanted to “hang”with me whenever I wanted to and that he’s being honest with me.There was one time after that when he didn’t respond to me.and I confronted him about it in kind of a light hearted way,but let him know I was growing impatient with his behavior.I think this woke him up a bit-LOL.I saw him once in August and then again on 9/11,which surprised me as he is a New York City firefighter.I would have thought because of what day it was,that he would spend it with the guys,but he contacted me and asked to spend the night with me-which we did,and it was AMAZING!!This was the first time we ever spent the night together,and I feel like we grew closer that night somehow.We told each other things about ourelves-nothing earth shattering-just things about when we were kids etc. that had never come up before.It was sweet.When he left the next morning I asked him if he was going to disappear again-his reply-“nope,I’m not disappearin’ again”.And he hasn’t.He contacted me again on Sept.25th and wanted to spend the day with me but I had to work.He was disappointed.I’m trying to just let him do the contacting-it’s difficult-LOL.I really like this guy and enjoy spending time with him.I am also not convinced that he is not seriously involved with another woman-maybe even married.I just don’t know!Stay tuned…
scopio men hell hate them
im telling you ladies i cant take nomore i will get a divorce
they selfish the think they all that im cancer and this relationship is driving me crazy
be real ladies you a are women and like to treat special its not all about good sex they dont care about what u feel romantic not at all they just love you to abuse you my husband scopio if i like something he hate it they want you to care 4r there feelling and they dont care 4 yours what is this im not desperate im just 23 years old i deseve better i deseve happyness
I wrote a commment a few weeks ago about being head over heels with a Scorpio man. He’s very hot and cold, off and on like a freaking light switch. We’d have great conversation, great emails ( its long distance), although we have gotten together from time to time and its been awesome, when he gets back to FL, the commuication sucks. It’s so off an on. He’s so flaky I cant even stand it. I’m a Taurus and I like conisistency and stability, so this is very frustrating. I’m just resigned to pretending as if he doesnt exist and forging ahead. Enough of this bull crap!
I will not give up on Scorpio men all togther though, because I’m dying to experience that intense passion. Being a Taurus woman, I’m very passionate too, so its a good match in that respect. This flake from FL has made me curious about how a better adjusted Scorpio man might be.
I will just hope to meet a LOCAL one, that is a bit more emotionally mature..
cyndi your a cancer??i kinda have a bias towards them…i dont really tend to get along with them..they are nice and all but theyre whining turns me off..just like yours is.
solution is simple,LEAVE the scorpion.FIN.
nancy give us an update since your last post?ive been busy..has he gone mia?or has kept his word?cause everything you wrote suggests things are going great.
i ll get a divorce next time if a scopio man try to talk to me i ll run so fast bc that a real hell ladies im telling you 4real i know how to take care my man but dis time ill give up, i have been with him 4r 4 years married 2 years with a baby boy he driving me crazy i dont know who im i anymore ;he never say i love you ,never talk to u if something wrong he just keep silence 4 a long time im the one who always try to fix things, he doesn’t care, if i hurt him he hurt me back, hes jealous oh everything wrong, only one thing they just helpfull he cook for me do laundry clean afer that nothing more ladies im in hell he make me feel like im nothing he took my love away whatever i do is wrong for him he always right and he wants me to know everything he ask me questions everytime and he wants to know who,where,how,when,why i cry everyday he dont even notice that, lets be real ladies what kind of love is that they just need someone to abuse and believe me they know how to abuse somebody the best way to live with a scopio is ignore them but you have to be patient bc the can keep silence for a long time but dont give up ignore them when they call act lke you tired, when they ask u to call dont call said that you were busy act like hes not even there, and they will come to you i know how to make him beg me but im not tryng anymore bc they will come beg u cry they will tell you they change they will never hurt you, but its for a while next week it wil be the same thing to win a scorpio love you have to be a baby and im not i have felling just like he does; i know some of you can deal with that kind of life but i cant i wish you all luck.
Harmonica-I’m a Cancer.Am I whiny?And,I wouldn’t say he’s gone MIA,although I haven’t heard from him since September 25th.This is not necessarily a bad thing though,as I’ve had a lot going on lately anyway.But yes,things in the recent past have been much better with him.
BTW, I posted on october 6th-update there in case you missed it.
i am a virgo and now i have realized that scorpio men sucks big time !!! they only know how to play mind games and always are suspicious that ppl might play similar mind games with them … always demanding and know very well how to exploit emotions.. they will make you beg … so all the ladies who love to maintain their self respect ..get out of the trap of these scorpio guys and start a new life … just move on !!! they love to regret and can never praise present .. so leave them asap and let them regret for rest of their lives ……
Im a Sagittarius lady (Dec 20) seeing a Scorpio guy (Oct26) for 3 months now. Reading these comments has me LMAO. A lot of things are on point. Im patient im just giving him his space, as I need my space. Time will tell.
ana,you are really ignorant and stupid.
harmonica believe me shes not stupid a scorpio man can kill you they know how to manipulate someone howcome you love someone and treat her like trash if i get mad with my husband and i dont talk to him for months he also spend months without talking to me 2 even he knows hes guilty
Hahaha this is so True!! I am sorry but I had to laugh. LOL
cancers too can play games..and they murder you with love.i can tell whenever a cancer is trying to tie her apron strings on me.anyways im just saying its stupid and ignorant to say all scorpio men are like that,and thats all they have to offer.all the girls that are satisfied by scorpios and have happy relationships are too busy i guess to post on this board.
but my beef isnt with you…so…
harmonica, its not that i have never been happy staying with scorpios…many of my friends are of this sunsign… but excess of everything is a problem sometimes …
about my scorpio..
he became my very good friend only in few days and that relationship has gone through many ups and downs … he is the sweetheart he knows me inside out… it freaks me out when he understands what I am about to say or feel .. Sometimes i feel in these many years I just don’t know him …. I give him lot of space and don’t expect much from him.. but he has lot of expectations from me which he doesn’t even say out loud… He doesn’t like me to give him suggestion but expect me to be caring .. I have complete trust on him but he warns me not to have .. in private he likes to abuse each and every person but would maintain good level of decency in public. His talks are full of witty and satirical comments. He never praises me but gazes at me, remember tiniest things about me and whatever things I say .. for days he just don’t call me ..and when i get angry says something very sweet that takes my breath away.. he calls himself manipulator i found him very kind-hearted… he always gives me priority over others (by cancelling all his appointments just to be with me) but shows as if I am of no importance ( sarcastic comments again) ..
I am unable to decipher him …. his complex nature is simply killing me… i don’t want to leave him but at the same time can’t live with him… wat to do ..i m helpless !!! 😦
Cassanova – I’m waiting…
Update – things continue to progress and he still hasn’t disappeared. My walls are on the ground now and I’ve decided to give him the benefit of the doubt until he gives me a reason to believe that he’s out to hurt me.
From reading all of the other updates, I feel as though I should consider myself lucky for the scorpio I have. I am hopeful that this won’t change for us in the future and I’m still looking for some positive outlook.
FF
Hello Harmonica.
hello nancy 🙂
Hello Femmefatale,
First of all I do really apologize for I did not writ you so soon as I would like to, and I appreciate that you pock me to keep my promise.
I would rather not pick and slice what you have said to get my point across….instead I would love tell you my perspective of Scorpio, as I am one and few of the Scorpio friends I have and some of the Scorpio I have come to know from different walks of life (I am Just 31).
I am “Original” Scorpio, every thing of me is Scorpio…the way I walk the way I talk…the way I manipulate words and situation, the way I reward for little good deed, and for the bad feeling surfaces in me even for little bad deeds…for many many many things i am the real SCORPIO.
As they have been saying, we dwell on the extremes, with us there are only white and black, not grey. When I love something it is with all my heart, for my surprise I have a lot of things I love that I have too much passion for… and a lot of things I hate that I become ice cold for(Zero passion).
When I love someone it is for real, I want it to last forever, the problem is I need something to refresh, of course trust issue is always there. I have to be able trust her all the time, I mean every second of the minute. If you can do that…it is huge step closer to be with the man of your dream, Scorpio Man, for the rest of your life.
How do you refresh Scorpio? Well this should not be difficult either, make him feel he is in charge all the time, I mean all the time! Be feminine, act feminine, he always wants to know that you are his precious beautiful thing that he wants to protect. And yet you should show him your feminine motherly care…caress him spontaneously, touch him when you feel like it, assure him that you love him for who he is, appreciate what he has done or trying to achieve….for sure Scorpio will achieve almost whatever he wants (I am a living example) and when he does…you should be the one whom he would say you were right behind me when I fought the battle, this precious medal is not for me, it for you, you deserve it, as always it the truth that it from the bottom his heart, it is always true!!!
Yes! one thing is so true about Scorpio, he becomes the coldest thing you have never known…but trust me that is for so short. During his coldest time you should always assure him that you are always his; tell him that you will be waiting for him until he come out of his shells. And again I am not sure why but when the coldest days of Scorpio are over he will come out with full force of love, the love you have never experienced before. May be it is when that most ladies out there feel the magnetic love of a Scorpio that is only written in a movie Script or Novels…I do not want to say I am the living proof, I AM!lol.
May be one more thing that you should try to refresh your relationship with Scorpio man is that take in charge of few things ones in while… arrange a dinner party for two, or surprise him with a dinner invitation at a nice restaurant he would appreciate … (you will see him jumping and huge you in front of many) …and look at him in the eyes (if you can) and tell him that how grateful you are that he is in your life …and of course tell him what his efforts and achievements [pick some rerences here] meant for you ….you know what I mean, you are smart lady! Right?
How do you win his trust? The answer is simple, be real!! (Not so much so that you look cheap though), and tell him the truth all the time when asked, you know why? I do not know how but we know every single deception told (or should I say lies intended to be told) and again do not ask me how…I do not have any idea how. For example when you talking to him his mind process the coherency of the things you told him few days ago and with the one you are telling him now, this will also be checked with your personality he very much knows and along the way he might find a broken line then he puts his question mark…it is this time that he is a little bit less hotter than he was a day before… (WITH SCOPRIO TRUST IS AN ISSUE).
And finally for all the ladies out there, please be patient with Scorpio man he could be in his Scorpio stage, may be lizard stage, for sure he will come the best when he is an eagle.
They say Scorpio is sooooooooooo sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet with age trust me it so true., I have known some people….there is nothing like Scorpio man when it comes to be best father and husband when the dust is settled. I am sure many ladies who have lived far enough with Scorpio man will come forward to acknowledge this.
I will come back with my Second part to put few line about faithfulness, promise, emotionality and many more in relation to Scorpio Man.
Femmefatale, I am sure with this I kept my promise, and I hope it will serve you well….be blessed.
BA
I love reading all of your comments each day. The my birthday is right around the corner, a little over a week and I get to celebrate my scorpio day. I’ll be posting a blog about it pretty soon.
thanks cassanova.. i love it..
thanks for sharing these things
Yes ladies and gentlemen.There’s nothing wrong everything you said about scorpios these are all true..I am scorpio woman and was supposed to get marry an scorpio military man.Wow..so much hurting words to say till we don’t want to be with each other in our mind but deep in our hearts we said oh no pls stay..this is totally devastating.Only true love stands the test of time.I was crying when he dumped me.I left him then he sent me email that he just neede space and time to be alone then will gonna find me..saying he was just out of line that’s why he accused me a lot of many things.I was crying when I read his email..I felt like I hurt him much when I left.But, I have to leave that day because He was too furious and confused.He can’t even swipe off my feet when he wanted to marry as early as possible while we were agreed before after 3 months would be our wedding.He can’t even wait..He said I have only agenda to leave him that’s why I don’t want to marry him.I cried a lot.It’s not like that..He must to be happy that I don’t even compromise him nor even give him an urgent wedding.I want true and honest relationship.I want to enjoy life while dating with him.That’s why we both agreed after 3 months.I sent email to him saying …You dumped me and need space? This is multiple space.He sent email to my friend saying I don’t understand him.This man sounds freak crazy soldier.In a relationship there should be a “trust” without this it’s too impossible to work out the relationship.He’s 35 but seems he’s 15 yrs old.I am 30 but sounds 45.One thing for sure we crazy in love each other but he is afraid of losing me someday and find someone else.What for? He had a big one…lol yeah and he told me you’re this and not that..while he was praising me before how smart I am..hahaha.he was just too insecure.I know and everybody told me I am smart.lol.He’s not the type of man who can bruise my ego…We are both scorpios.He stung me, I sting him back.Let us be firm ladies dating those freaky scorpios.Let us stand in ourselves to prove that we are a goal achiever not waiting for them to give us a fulfilling life.Get out from your rut.Be gentle and love yourself.
Have a nice day.
Marie
Hi, I’ve dating a Scorpio guy for three month now and this past Monday we had this big blow out and I broke it off with him. The raseon being is that I states he realize he doesn’t want to get married for the next eight years this is when he retires from the service. He also told me that he doesn’t want a serious relationship but he doesn’t want to lose me. I ask what is it he wants betweeen us he says he wants to be friends with benefits so I felt that was disrespectful and I broke it off. So he text me today which four days later he’s sorry and he wants me in his life so I told him we can be casual friend were we talk every now and then. But yet he still wants to meet me to talk so I’ve decided to give him a hard time and told him we can meet on my time and my time only. Would someone please tell what is the real deal with this guy? In the beginning he was like I’m his future wife and now it’s I’m not ready for a serious relationship.
Hi! Im a cancer and i’ve been with my scorp for a year now. I am totaly crazy about him. He is not like any other guy. He makes me feel loved and unloved at the same time. We always have fights but it wont last an hour. He is so strong and silent. He never say sorry even it is his fault. One day, we got into fight because I can’t take all the sleppless nights of thinking where he is, days without him calling me, countless times that I feel I am a stransger to him and seem not to care about me! I tell him words that really hurts him, he look so calm but believe me, he’s not! He slapped his face many times as hard as he could in front of me! He didn’t even say a single word! after minutes of silence, he told me to come near him, he hugged me so tight.. and without him saying anything, I feel how sorry he is.. it is so magical, a hug can explain everything… a hug that can cure the pain that you cannot endure. I asked him ” why do you love me?” He simply answered ” Because I know and I feel that you love me”. Up until now, I don’t understand why he is acting that way.. But I cannot change him.. All I can do is accept him. I know deep in my heart that I love him, and what I feel is the mirror of love that he can offer me…
Thank you Casanova for your insight.
It’s interesting, because a lot of what you explain, I’ve already discussed with my scorpio. I guess my new thought is, are we doing the right things together naturally because it’s just supposed to work for us, or is there something else going on that’s affecting his natural tendencies? Let me give you some more detail to help you understand.
You speak of trust. Well it’s funny you talk about this. My scorpio is often yelling at the tv and calling women stupid or evil. I confronted him about this the other day and asked him why he has such a strong distaste for women. He told me he didn’t know, but that he just felt he could not trust them. I asked if there was one instance or situation that made him feel this way and he told me no, that he just always felt like he could never trust women and this is probably why he has been single for most of his life. I then reminded him that I was a woman and that if he couldn’t trust women, then obviously he couldn’t trust me and that if he couldn’t trust me that this wouldn’t work for us. He simply said ‘For some reason I trust you and always have.’ Now I’ve been in multiple relationships where I’ve been cheated on and disrespected and the men I was with couldn’t be trusted. I know what it’s like to feel that and therefore would never want to inflict that on anyone else unless they deserved it. (The vindictive side of my calm exterior.)
You also talk of change and how they/you need it. I see this as well and we’ve discussed this. Funny thing is that I feel the same way about myself. When life gets stale, I get down until I can find something to throw into the routine to change it up a bit. The problem is that normally involves things like, selling and buying a new house, breaking up my relationship, changing careers….etc. We talk about up and moving to another province together and we haven’t even discussed living together yet. He talks about us retiring down south…I think because he can’t just up and change as easily as I (he owns his own practice), he likes to create these scenarios in his mind. I’ve also asked him if he thought he would eventually tire of having the same woman and he told me he thought if that were to happen, it would have happened already. I think because we both tire easily of the same routine, we’re both subconsciously creating fun little sparks to throw into the relationship mix. We ‘pretend’ fight and then I kiss his cheek when he’s not looking and least expects it and he smiles. We pick at each other for fun and then without a word he’ll grab me and bring me close to him to rest on his chest. Sometimes I sneak up behind him when he’s in the kitchen and throw my arms around him from behind…and I can tell he really enjoys this, as do I. My previous relationships wouldn’t allow for these moments because the men I was with rarely enjoyed being touched without it being a pre-curser to some bedroom activity.
His coldness. I’m hoping I have this figured out with my scorpio. I’ve been reading these posts for a few months now and have been fearing the time when my scorpio starts to hide. I’m not sure if he hides like the rest. There does seem to be weeks every now and again that we don’t see each other as much, and I don’t hear from him a lot. But this only ever lasts for a few days and during this time, he’s still calling me and emailing me, it’s just not as much as other weeks. We see each other every weekend. It just seems to be a given that I show up with bags packed on Friday’s when I finish work and I don’t leave until Sunday night.
As for ‘taking charge’ and ‘surprising’ my Scorpio. This is the one thing I never agreed with when reading descriptions of a scorpio man. You see I am a very independent woman and I actually am handier around the house than my scorpio man. He’s procrastinated and lived quite batcheloresque for many years and his house is showing signs of neglect. Every weekend I make a list of things that need to be done around the house and I teach him how to do these things. He seems to enjoy this and is eager to learn again every weekend. Yet on the other side of the coin, I let him be the man when it comes to driving and cars and electronics. I am the woman who sits beside him and hands him what he needs and cleans up when he’s making the mess. So maybe this is the ideal mix for my scorpio. I also let him teach me new things too, and I try to be a good listener because I know he enjoys teaching people. As for the ‘surprising’ factor, you mentioned a dinner. I have already been planning a surprise dinner for him for his birthday. I don’t know many of his friends very well, but thanks to the magic of facebook I’ve been able to arrange a good size group of people to meet us at the restaurant I am taking him to.
I quite understand what you mean when you speak of just knowing when someone is lying. I have a very good intuition and have been told my card readers and palm readers on many occasions that I need to trust my own intuition more often….and the scary part is, that when I get a feeling, nine times out of ten, my thoughts are right. I have no intention of deceiving or lying to my scorpio, but this doesn’t stop me from questioning his actions (but only in my own mind, I’d never accuse him without any hard evidence). He is after all a man.
I believe that my scorpio, because of his age, is in his eagle stage already and perhaps this is why my experience seems to be working compared to what others have shared. Part of me also wonders if perhaps there is a part of him that is overpowering his natural scorpio tendencies, and I often wonder if perhaps I am part of some mid-life crisis. He is 14 years my senior…that coupled with the fact that he is a good-looking, successful and a caring man and has only ever had one relationship (2 years-long distance, on and off). Why would he all-of-a-sudden want to settle down and talk marriage and retiring together, etc etc. Why isn’t he running? Can you explain that one Casanova? Could this perhaps be a mid-life crisis?
FF
Hi all
Im a gemini woman. I have been reading these posts carefully to get some insight into my Scorpio man. Guess I shouldn’t say “my” but we met through work he and from day one I knew he would be very beneficial and a blessing to my life. He is so driven and I am just not use to that. I can only wish for a guy like him. This stage of my life I want someone to take charge instead of me. But the only catch is we are both married. I am the motivator/initiator in my marriage. Not to discount my hubby(of 20+yrs) he is what I prayed for as a girl faithful,excellant provider and father.
Although There isn’t any funny business going on between me & Scorpio.
sometimes I see it his eyes he wants to go there and heaven knows I feel what he is feeling.
He touch my arm once and My my my I thought I would melt his touch was deep and he wanted a response but it took everything in me not to fall into the spell he was trying to put on me
I know if we every confront the feelings it will be explosive with passion. It’s scary & beautiful at the same time because I know I would not have any desire to stop him if he wanted to cross the strictly business line. We have a wonderful repore and when we are together others feed off of our energy. But the thing is that I have noticed all the quirks you all speak of. The periods when he hot/cold, disappears or becomes distant. Initially I thought I did something to offend him. But then
I approached him once he returned to the office and I let him have it.
I told you I am a gem I will go from the sweetest twin to the baddest twin in 2.2 milli seconds. I thought he was avoiding me and I asked him what is going on. This is prior to me reading these posts. I felt betrayed (he swept me off my feet and then dropped me)…LOL. well don’t you know I saw him smile and say I guess we were just missing one another….it was a test
to see what I was feeling for him. hey Im a gem I will tell him what I am feeling….he didn’t have to go there …lol
but I guess what I am trying to say with this is I am so happy he came into my life and I do know how to handle him now….1 thing about this gemini I am a quick study so I will let this play out how ever it will be !!… to be continued……
“I will go from the sweetest twin to the badest twin in 2.2 milli seconds” well said! I have never seen such a truth written in a blog…I have seen that for three years till i say I am done.
Welcome to the most mind boggling, extremely off and on relationship of your life. If you handle the heat your choice will be vindicated eventually.
Ex GI Jane we all are waiting for what to be continued…personally I can’t wait, could you make it quick. TKS
Hey Cassanova – I’m still waiting for that second part you promised!
FF
Hi Femmefatal, how is your relationship with Scorpio man going? I did not forgate it, it is just that I did not get much time to write as much as I would love to, pleaseg give some time, I will be back with more of me.
Cheers!
BA
Hello All,
I posted a few messages a month or so ago and thought I could just forget about the Scorp guy I met, but CANT! lol.
I am a Tauraus, who met a Scorp guy in late August and we’ve spent a few absolutely fantastic weekends together. We are both extremely passionate, sensual lovers so the sex is out of this world… (this is long distance, which makes it worse) and I am truly infatuated with this man, but he is so hot and cold.
He goes through stages, maybe a few weeks at a time when he wont call, IM, text.. NOTHING. I dont initiate contact frequently, but it’s so annoying when I email or leave a voicemail and I get nothing back. It’s been that way for a couple of weeks…. that is until this weekend. All of a sudden I calls, texts emails, as if we picked up where we left off before he went missing. He tells me he’s thinking about me and can’t wait to plan a weekend. What kills me is that I know he’s going to be incommunicado again,thus making me frustrated and wanting to write him off. We are not exclusive, yet we never discuss what the other does. Hell,we just met end of August and dont live in the same state, but I’d like to get something tangible started here and build on something.
I am completely mesmerized by this man. He exudes charm and is sooooo sexy and I can barely stand it. He’s a gentleman and he has a good heart and I have seen a bit of vulnerablitly in his eyes. YES, I caught a glimpse 🙂 He’s in his mid 40’s and has never been married, but has been in some pretty serious long term relationships. I think he’s hesitant to get into something deep now. I’m 40, divorced with no kids ( neither of us have kids) so we both have the flexibility to hop on a plane whenever.
Anyway, if anyone could give me some words of encourgagement, advice or even a reality check, I’d appreciate it.
LadyT.
Reread my comment written on 22 October 2009,#190?
Hope it helps.
BA
Scorpio Update:
Well things continue to progress with this Scorpio man of mine. I will not lead you astray however, as it has not been all wonderful and passionate. We’ve had a rocky couple of weeks. What amazes me though is that even during our time of turmoil and strife, and through the frustration we’ve both felt towards each other, he has not disappeared like true Scorpio form. He has never disappeared or stopped talking to me or wanting to see me. I’ve felt him pull back and take a colder front when communicating with me, but within a few hours he’s back to his normal self. Perhaps this is due to the fact that I have informed him that if he did ‘disappear’ for any length of time, that the chances of me waiting for him on the other end are quite slim. (Harsh…I know, but I pine for no one, not even an amazing scorpio man)
We both continue to make plans into the future and have more travel plans booked for Christmas. He’s informed me that he’s very content with our relationship and that he hasn’t felt this good in a very long time. I’m certainly hopeful that things will progress and that we will get through these small issues that are currently present. I still have my fears, but I’m trying to keep them under control. I’d rather experience this now and have it end horribly, then to never experience it at all. I guess that’s the place you have to come to when getting involved with a scorpio.
FF
FF- Sounds like your Scorp guy is pretty grounded and emotionally mature. Also, there is obviously no doubt he is into you. Best of luck with your holiday plans and enjoy your guy!
Cassanova- I re-read your post and I appreciate you sharing your insight. Very helpful. I’m sure I’ll be deferring to you for advice as I navigate my way through this relationship.
Good news- The last week and half or so has been awesome. My guy seems to have come out of his shell and has been very communicative, infact he invited me to rendezvous with him while he’s traveling the weekend of Dec 4th- next week! He booked my travel for me and everything.. I know the weekend will be awesome, as usual, but when the weekend is over and I get home, I sure hope he continues the communication. 🙂
Cheers,
LadyTaurus
Hey LadyTaurus!I have posted many times on here about my Scorpio guy.Many ups and downs-sadly,mostly downs.I have come to the conclusion that I’m done with him.It was a long,difficult (sometimes painful), bumpy road to get to this point!Suffice it to say, a friendship that I have had with a very nice guy for almost 3 years,has recently started to become more.Go figure!I have learned in the past few months, that I truly deserve to be treated with respect and courtesy.This is how my friend treats me-my friend the Aries.LOL While there is a lot to be said for passion and excitement,there is more to be said for stability,consistency,trust and caring.Take it from me-it was majorly hard to let go of the Scorpio! I am only in the beginning stages of doing that,but I feel so much better!Have you seen the movie”He’s Just Not That Into You”?My situation exactly.This friend of mine was someone I went to for advice about my Scorpio-LOL-and he did give me some good advice which I will share with you.Guys have a scale on which is a list of things in their life.Ranked from 0-5 for the sake of arguement.Maybe his job is a 5-most important and maybe you are .5 or 1 or maybe higher.It means that you ARE on his scale,but,in your heart of hearts, are you REALLY OK being ranked there?I played games in my head to try and convince myself that I was OK with it because I have never known such passion and sensuality ever before.But the truth was,I was not OK with it.I do not want or deserve to be wondering if and when I will hear from this guy again,and if I do hear from him again,will he disappear again?It seriously became painful and torturous!I met him in June of 2008,and if you read back to my first post in Sept.2008,you will see the rollercoaster I’ve been on.I do not recommend this to anyone!LOL! I believe in giving people the benefit of the doubt,but I also put up with way more than I should too-especially from this guy!There was just something about him! But I can not continue to look at that part of it anymore!As for my friend the Aries,this is a huge surprise to me!I never expected this in a million years!I think it’s throwing us both for a loop a little bit-LOL.There is not this wild attraction with him that I had with the Scorpio, but the more time we spend together getting to know each other,joking around,sharing meals(he actually cooked me dinner a few weeks ago and can not even cook)LOL-just doing normal stuff together like going to Best Buy for a DVD rack for his livingroom and dropping stuff off at The Salvation Army, is bonding us and he becomes cuter and more attractive to me everytime I see him!WOW!In closing,look at “the scale”and see if you are REALLY OK being at whatever rank you are at.Be honest with your heart-it’s the only one you will ever own-you were born with it-protect it.Don’t let it be broken by the wrong one,but keep it intact for yourself,and the one who is waiting for you where you least expect it.
Hi Nancy,
Thanks so much for your advice. Yes, I certainly did read your posts and felt bad for you and for myself! I’m SO GLAD you met a man that genuinely cares about you and gives you the attention you deserve! If you read my post dated November 27th, I’m really excited to be seeing my Scorp guy this weekend, but I’m preparing myslef to not hear from him for at least a week after we have a phenominal time.. which sucks. This “relationship” is long distance, so I’ve continued to keep my hat in the ring at home and have a prospect that I met recently, a Sagittarius, whom Taurus’s arent supposed to be compatible with, but he seems very nice. However, the enitre time we are out on a date, I cannot get the Scorp out of my head! When I return from FL on Sunday, I will try my hardest to put him behind me.
Lady T
OMG..I have been reading these blogs for hours because I am transfixed with how ACCURATE they are in describing the SCORPIO male LOL!!! I have become friends with a male Scorpio (Im Pisces) and we have been flirting VERY graphically via text for over a month! He says he doesnt want anything apart from fun ..a no strings approach. BUT he is sending me mixed messages continually! We text each other DAILY and on a good day that can be as many as 100 texts! He says he doesnt want anything serious on a regular basis..but in the same breath hes telling me he wants more kids one day! He does run HOT and COLD thats something I learned early on. We are both at uni, and dont mix when there. Its all a secret and no one knows about us which is even more of a kick lol! I am 38 and he is 29!! We just dont seem to be getting down to anything intimate as he keeps making excuses about meeting up! I almost feel he is shy!
I dont know what to make of it all..Im usually the one in control in relationships but this guy has me going weak at the knees to the point of total dominance on his part lol! I have such a gut feeling that we have a future, but wouldnt dream of telling him this as he would Im sure run a mile! He never compliments me..I always seem to be the one boosting his ego lol! WHAT IS THAT ALL ABOUT lol!
Ladies and Gents…should I walk away now before we actually DO get intimate and I get even more hooked..or let things carry the natural course?
Pisces_dreaming
Hi
I met a guy 3 years ago over internet. We were a great friend. After 6 months we met. And remain friend. We shared each others feelings. But never said any love talk. After 1 year i realize that i love him. One day i said this to him. he said he think me as a friend. And he dont want to get committed if he dont feel the same. After that we were friend. He moved to other country. Many times i talked to him about this. Whenever i talked to him about this, he get over emotional. But when i dont notice him he tried to take my attention. Now after 2 years he come back. And he is saying our relationship is not possible. Whether i say it or not. He said we are not similar. We have this this problem. I dont say anything. He is scoropio. He is very dominating over me. The more i try show him that i am not in love him, he said i am in love with him and it is not possible. I am a cancer. Please advise.
Hello,
Well, I had a great weekend with my Scorp guy. I saw him 12/4-12/6. He was such a sweet caring gentleman. I even got to see the boyish side of him, which was soo cute. He even made the comment “this just feels right” when we were laying in bed saturday morning, but true to form, I have not heard from him since he called to make sure I got home safely Sunday night. He has retreated as usual and I’m bummed, but not as much as I would be if I didnt already know that this was what his behavior would be. Oh, well…
LadyTaurus
I have been seeing a scorpio man on&off
now for about a month.
He said he likes me ,but now it’s like
he does not call me for days & I do not want to bother him because i know he works hard at his job all week, but I have yet to see him on a weekend.
We had a misunderstanding the first week
we were together and i was hurt & a little
angry & i was giong to leave a message
on his voice mail but he answered & everything was fine. But now it seems as if he is playing some kind of mind game with
me, & I do not like games if he is not interested anymore i wish he would just tell me instead of keepng me guessing.
Anyway I guess i’ll wait a little longer to see what happens, but not too much longer
it is driving me crazy.
Hi ya’ll. I stumbled onto this forum after having a fight with my girlfriend. Im a scorpio and shes an aries. Its true that we can be very deep, emotional, passionate etc. As far as us being hot or cold, this is the music that will tame the beast. My favorite girl and I bump heads all the time. Like I said shes a strong, independent, dont need no man to open my door type o woman, so I moved in with her because I love her. I would sacrifice my own sense of control to enable her to feel like the boss (tip #1: to give power is to recieve even more power). I most of the time let her win our little squables, even when we both know that Im right and shes wrong. I love her so I dont mind chewing whatever she throws on my plate. (tip #2: never take advantage). This is the cold part. However this particular fight started to warm up a little. In the beginning of our relationship I jokingly told her that I never do dishes, and that I dont believe in dishwashers. Anyway she had some of her friends over the other night and they really made a mess, dishes piled up and empty wine bottles, and glasses everywhere. Well I cleaned the whole apartment. I washed all the dishes, and really made the place look like new while she was at work. I even cooked a nice spagetti dinner. she came home saw the place and was sooo happy. The next thing you know we were kissing. We went from the counter top in the kitchen, to the bedroom floor, then to the bed. We had thee hottest, most passionate sex maybe in our whole relationship of 3.5 yrs. Afterwards she got in the shower, and i turned on the TV. She started talking to me from the shower. I was standing in the doorway but facing the TV. Well she thought I wasnt listening to her, and peeks her head out of the shower in perfect timing of me switching the channels to see a belly dancer on the screen. Well she just went off. Anyone who knows an aries woman should know that they require your undivided attention. Furthermore any of that precious attention better not of all places be on another woman. So she starts cursing me out. I tried to reason with her, but she wasnt trying to hear it. Now shes out of the shower swearing and calling me names I didnt deserve to be called. (tip #3: before you kindle a fire have a buckett of water handy). It was right about then that the lava that flows beneath my skin began to simmer. So i ask her to get a grip and lower her voice. Then she tells me that I was in her house and that if I didnt like it I could pack my things and get out. you kno that lava I mentioned, now its bubbling. Anyway she slammed the bedroom door in my face. I love this woman to death, and I just wanted to swallow the whole thing, so i asked her to open the door. she responded with a stern f*@k you. Well friends the lava had nothing else to do so it exploded. Before I knew it I had grabbed the pot of steaming spagetti, and slung it all over the kitchen. The counter, the floor. Then I grabbed a bottle of red wine and painted the walls with it. I really destroyed the kitchen I had spent all day cleaning. and when I left I slammed the door so hard i think i broke one of the hinges. I really dont know what came over me. I guss the point im trying to make is the scorpion is allways struggling to resolve a conflict. It might be something small like him deciding should he express his overwhelming love for someone he just met an hour ago on the internet, or remain a mystery. It might be something huge like him deciding should he keep his day job, or should he have that novel hes writing on the secret of life published. So ladies bear with him it may seem like he plays games, but the decisions he makes usually tip the scales drastically one way or the other. hopefully this story will give you some insight into your scorpio. Oh and dont worry first thing in the morning ill show up on her doorstep with a rose, and all my cleaning supplies.
Thank you scorpio_lava for sharing your experience.
WOW……..It takes time for Scorpio to explode, but when he does, you will be the one who will clean the mess…it is so true. Thank you
Lava…i think you are a scorpio!haha,personally i think all the women in this forum are nuts!!(im a scorpio)i dont even bother to reply,im personally sick of so much drama and bullshit,im really trying to just be financially stable and independent,working on my career…and if i meet a woman and she give me shit,ill just tell her to get her ass on down the road.
Hey I’m a pisces,ijust start seeing my scorpio guy like for four months now.and I think I’m starting to fall for him already. It easly to fall hard for them.but I’m just waiting for him to get deep with me.I’m 23 and he 37
But I like that he’s older. But I’m still trying to learn more and I been reading the postes on. And I want to know if there has been any postive relationships long term.
You sound like me a few months back. I’m in my twenties and my scorp is in his forties. I was also searching for some positivity…didn’t find a lot of examples, but I like to think I’m creating precedence here. I think you and I have a slight advantage with dating an ‘older’ scorp because I believe the maturity level helps to stifle their natural tendancies to be dickheads.
Anyways, just wanted to pass that along to you. We’ve been dating for 8 months now and it’s just been in recent weeks that things are starting to feel more comfortable for me and a lot of the relationship insecurities and fears I had previoualy seem to be vanishing. So there might be hope! Just play your cards right for now…
I like to think that I’m having some luck with my scorpio. He has still yet to disappear, and things seem to be progressing nicely with him. What I am struggling with is trying to determine how he really does feel about me and where we are going in this. It feels like we’re stuck in this holding pattern just hovering above the airport trying to decide if we should land and where we should land. He has never told me how he feels about me, just that he’s happy that I’m in his life. He talks about the distant future, but not the tomorrows.
So yes…it is possible to be successful with a scorpio man, it just seems to involve a significant amount of patience.
FF
Yes ff I agree it seems to me that it takes a lot of patience with these guys. But its really driveing mee crazy. Because I finally ask my guy how does he feel about me. He says that he really like spending time with me and he wish he can spend more. That’s great and all but I feel that I’m the one making the effort to reach out more. We are dateing so I really gone cut about all my friends off for this guy. But I want to know do we really have a future together? Because I don’t won’t to get hurt.
this site pretty much sums up my scorpio man. We have been on and off for so long I have no idea what to do with him. Try being a Leo which is a fixed sun sign and him a fixed water sign. I would say he is so amazing in bed that it is not bad giving up the power struggle there. Sooner or later I think we will figure out what we are to each other.
shanda – don’t cut out your friends, in fact, making plans with your friends when he hasn’t set aside time for you will work in your favor. Right now he thinks that he can call you on a whim and get your undivided attention. This is too easy for your scorp, he likes a challenge and a woman who has her own stuff going on. I started to fall into that pattern with my scorp a few months back and then one week he turned the cold water on a bit. So I stopped answering his calls and only responded to every couple of his emails and when he finally invited me out to dinner one night, I told him no, because I had already made plans. Now he knows that if he can’t always invite me out last minute, that I have a life of my own and if he wants to see me he has to set aside time for me. I also told him that it’s okay for him to want his alone time, but that if he ever ‘goes into his cave’ and doesn’t return for a few days that chances are I won’t be waiting on the other side. I’ve made him beleive that I can move on quickly (even though the truth is it would kill me to end it with him) but I’m not at a point where sharing that with him will make things better for us.
We continue to progress in our relationship. He’s given me a key to his house – told me it just seemed ‘easier’ for me to have one. I haven’t given him one to mine, but I have a roommate and he understands that it’s out of respect for her. There is still no talk of ‘moving in together’ or anything like that…but things feel great right now.
The one thing I keep telling myself is that if this ever gets to a point where I am crying more often than smiling, then nothing else matters…I need to move on. As hard as that would be, a relationship should never cause you so much unecessary pain and it would be a sign that there is definitely soemone better suited for me out there.
FF
Ok ff I seen what you was saying. Because I had went out to a party sunday. And I told him I had plans and he ask me how did it go I told him I had a good time which I know he was on my mind like the whole time even tho I met some guys who I wasn’t really into. But anyway that next day was kind of strange after we had good convo about the party and laugh and all. That monday we only had talked like one time that day I normally talk to him during the day because I work first. And he work third. But I only had spoke to him one time during that day and I said he normally text me the night because we talk for hours before he go to work. So that was strange not hearing from him. So the next day came and he text me saying he was thinking about me and everything. So I said ok. And the same thing happen that night. So I start saying to my self maybe he need some space is I’m texting to much is he tired of me. I start to get in my worry mode. So I said I’m not go bother him if he going thu something right now. So I just told him that I was concern about him if he needed to talk he could call me. So he did he said every thing was fine between me and him. He came up the next day when I was off he’s from sc and I’m from nc. So we had a long talk got to know more of our personal life about each other. And I pray and said to god if this the man for me I’m just put it in his hands. And don’t worry. And don’t rush it. So things has been going good every since we back to normal with the calls. But the most question I asked him was do he see his self settleing down again? And he told me yes so that gives me much hope that we can possiable have a future together.
Hey ff we’ll I can say that it is going pretty well for me and my guy. I got a lot of answers that I needed to know. which mainly was could he possiable see a future with me. And he said yes but we are going to take it step by step and see what happens. And I like that answer. Because he from sc and I’m from nc and he comes here to see me all the time. And I’m wanting to get into his world which he has invited me. which I plan on going down to his house the next time we plan to meet up. I felt like this time go round we learned even more about each other we got even closer. But I’m still trying to take my time with this man. Don’t get to in patience. And leave it in gods hands. When he with me he is a great and a kind lover he treats me with respect. He’s like the guy I be wanting and needing in my life. I just don’t want to rush and take my time. Which this is a major challage for me because I know how I fall in love and I don’t won’t to get hurt again like my passed relationships.I just have a feeling if I just stop worrying take one step at a time then we should be alright. But ill keep you posted.
I hope this comment go thou. Yes ff I know what you mean. But when I seen my guy I had to ask him some questions this week. And the most question was can he see his self settleing down again? And he said yes but we are going to take it slow and see what happen. That was a good answer for me. This time when we met up it felt like we learned even more about each other. We got closer to each other which was a good thing.and I know that I could possiable have a future with this guy. But I’m willing to take it slow which is going to be a challage for me because I know how I fall in love. But I don’t won’t to get hurt either. So I’m just put in gods hand and let him work with it.
But I keep you updated. But I’m happy that you and your guy is still progressing which I see is step by step. And that’s how I want me and my. Guy to be.
I just want to know one thing … being a virgo I expect my man to initiate and express his feelings towards me… but he being mysterious and lovable…. try his all ways to NOT say the L word and make me helpless as he knows he is irrestible and damn sexy… He sometimes talks abt his ex gf who has left him and now is happily married just to make me jealous and less arguable. He is walking on my nerves and playing with my mind…
I try hard to probe him by calling him flirt and non serious entity.. which he denies completely …
I want him so much that i can’t risk my life without him (and still thinking abt him all the time)in case he is not that serious and leaves me eventually …
Do they take so much in saying L word or I should initiate ?
I’m curious to know as well – my scorp and I haven’t exchanged the L word and I too am a little scared to take that first step. He talks about buying a house together and about engagement rings, but I’m left thinking about the fact that we’re missing that one small step…
Yes I think the do take a long time its hard enouigh to get them to open up with the feelings.
at least yall have that much. I’m still trying to see my scorpio more. I just feel like he not trying hard enough.
Hello Ladies…..This Scorpio man is looking for a very special lady…if i cant find that special lady…then I will take a few…anyway im professional, Educated wealthy and Healthy….I love Leo, Virgo, Aquarius and Aries women….
Holla @ me….
Sir scorpio what’s wrong with a pisces woman?
Hello Shanda!
In all honesty I never had a Pisces woman. I have experience with all others. I seem to get along well with the ones I mentioned.
Here is why: I have Sun Scorpio-Moon Leo-Aries Asc…..Venus Libra and Mars Scorpio.
Jupiter Aquarius-Saturn Capricorn….
Oh ok I was just really asking b-c I’m am a pisces and I’m dealing with a scorpio male. And I thought maybe you had an experience with a pisces woman. But I looked up pisces and scorpio we seen to match well. But I was just wondering.
Pisces and Scorpio are supposed to be one of the best matches. I’m also pisces.
FF
Sigh, need help! Was hot and heavy with a Scorpio Man and just like in the previous posts instant cool. I don’t understand, he told me he loved how upfront,and not shy I am. What should I do? We talked everyday straight for a Mo and texting all day and then nothing. Also I’m very stubborn and have not text or called him since he has not answered my last text. Plus to add this is a phone relationship as we are a few states away from eachother…
Hey frustratedAries!!!
if u need to release some of that tension…we scorpio men can help…U Aries Gurlz need an outlet 4 all da pent-up-frustraion u have…we can rock-ur-Lilman-n-da-boat…with pleasure…LOL
LOL Hmmm not too sure if you Scoprio men are my cup of tea.
scorpio* 😉
I had a rocky but very intense thing with a female Aries for 3 years. She was quite the little pistol. She was magnetized and moist in anticipation from my penetrative calm in the bedroom. And that woman loved to fight, pout, scream and then go out for share ice-cream. I am Sun/Mars/Venus/Mercury/Pluto in Scorpio so I breathe a ton of other volcanic inner passions, so when together… we were either boiling hot or chilly cold. Her feisty-self wanted to be the boss butI wouldn’t let her. And she loved that. So… you can imagine what Pluto did to put a cheery grin on her beautiful youthful face:)
Mmmhmm You scorpios. The one I am or was involved with (we’ll see) drives me crazy! I love how arrogant he is, how in a sick kind of way has a “control” over me (which NO man has had before), he has the most sexiest voice and eyes I have ever seen. I still have not heard from him nor have I tried to contact him “yet”. I am trying to control my impulse to call or text. I just can’t figure him out not used to being dropped out of nowhere. Any advice on what to do from this point?
Well, he could be dating other women but if her were similar to me, I’d say that he is not “pursuing” you intentionally. I don’t pursue any woman because that represents a wussbag who gives away his personal power to a woman. An imbalance takes form when a guy follows, because women hold expectations for scores of men to grovel and impress them and to always “Obey” them. My advice to you would be to remember who you’re dealing with. Our Inner Strength & Willpower is nothing to be taken lightly or for granted. We know more about your little mind games and subtle sexual seductions than you could imagine. We/I, Lead women to the promised land. If you don’t like our Truth and Authenticity then you’re with the wrong guy. I’m sure there are millions of men who’d love to call you 9 times a day, compliment you 13 times an hour, and follow you around like a spineless, hesitant marshmallow. Stay on your tippy-toes little Aries. Daddy doesn’t > need < you to mother him.
Thank you for the insight. This is why I find him so fascinating. I love the challenge but at the same time I’m becoming very bored with the situation. Received a text lastnite let it sit for a hour then responded. It was like we had never stopped talking. So intense and fun. Tho I am treading carefully just waiting to see if he contacts me again. I tend to go in head first and act on impulse we laugh about my “open mouth, insert foot” quality which pops up alot lol So we’ll see where this goes.
You mentioned the times when you get ‘bored easily.’ A healthy perspective for you to remember is that the male Scorpio nature will not be “played with” or fiddled with like “a toy.” A big turn off in our complex nature is when the woman we love thinks she can pull the wool over our eyes. Aka… taking our sincerity and emotional intelligence for granted. A woman’s happiness and fulfillment with a male Scorpio is dependent on her deeper emotional needs for a true & meaningful connection or union. If we can’t respect you, your inner-self, we can’t trust you to learn about yourself or us. We will test you and test you to help us identify if you are in-with-us… all the way. The intensity and extremism of our nature, often frightens women who are alien to feeling something real. We’ll bring out your highest potential as a sexual being if you allow yourself to surrender. So if your boredom is overwhelming you, remember that those fickle associations are fizzing your head, an not in his reality. There are many directions for you to go with other types of men. Namely, the development of superficial and meaningless interaction that can cure your “boredom.” A toy… or a Weak and Un-Assertaive male, is not the guy who you will fall in love with. Because an Identity and a Truth is void in that kind of male. All the best;)
Ok to clear the “boredom”. I’m very uprfront and a fast paced person. The rate this is moving for me is waay to slow and frankly taking a bit of a toll. He managed to open me up in ways that noone else has and it kinda scared me how easliy I confided in him. He’s so secretive and hard to figure out. I’m used to men showering attention on me and the fact that he’s not keeps me interested. Now in my vain ways the “boredom” that I have is the waiting and time will tell. I get so offended at the thought of him not wanting me (sounds so bad I know) that I get it in my head that he’s playing a game and I’m done. Then when he contacts me it’s a high that I can’t explain. All the anger I had completely disappears. I don’t like how this makes me feel vulnerable at times, but at the same time it is something that I haven’t had before either. I love reading your posts they explain everything I have been wanting to ask. Guess, this is probaly why Aries and Scorpios are not good matches lol
“The rate this is moving for me is waay to slow and frankly taking a bit of a toll.”
LoL! That was a quick change of feeling for a woman who initially stated she was attracted to his “intense” and “fascinating” behavior. The cuteness of Aries women and their flimsy devotion to chemistry makes me smile.
“I get so offended at the thought of him not wanting me (sounds so bad I know) that I get it in my head that he’s playing a game and I’m done.”
If he can’t be upfront and honest with you and specific about where your “thing” together is going… I believe you are committing yourself, your time, your ferocious energy… to the wrong guy. In many powerful aspects, we male Scorpios really want to feel needed and wanted. Maybe more-so than a stunning knockout feminine beauty whom craves feeling “wanted” by a nation of drooling, spineless men. Btw, the male Scorpio ego is very defined and specific. We have strong-intense likes and dislikes. We know in depth, who we truthfully are – and most intangibly-> who we are Not.
“I don’t like how this makes me feel vulnerable at times, but at the same time it is something that I haven’t had before either.”
It is not “bad” or retarded to feel something special and unique. That is your gift from us. When a woman feels the desire to merge intimately with a male… she feels the fire in her belly, she becomes increasingly afraid with the anticipation of not maintaining control, as she is accustomed to doing with thousands of needy males. Just remember that those vulnerabilities you are experiencing are “TRUE” indicators, not false mental illusions, that you desire to merge your innocence with a force which has meaningful Power over you. That is why a woman must eventually “surrender” to the intensities of her attraction, and become a stronger woman through the process of such a chemistry.
“I love reading your posts…”
Well hello there! So then you love me! LoL. These posts are written by a male who specifically knows himself, who knows exactly what he wants in life, and will not settle for anything ordinary. He loves growing. He may swoop you around the waist and pull you into his chest. He may gaze deeply into your innocent Bambi eyes and kiss you on the nose. By that time your heat will be a product of his heat, and he’ll be kissing you passionately until you melt into butter. He won’t ask for your permission to connect. He just does. and btw… your cheery spirit is refreshing too;)
“Well hello there! So then you love me!”….
Cute! Uh Oh, tread carefully there…I am a Aries Woman 😉
Well he did contact me on Saturday. I was out so I didn’t respond as quickly as I usually do. Which I will say WOW he did not like. lol I was given the 3rd degree on what and who I was with. Which I of course gave vague answers too as I didn’t quite appreciate that. Since I haven’t heard from him in a few days. So I gave a estimated time of when I would be home and well let’s just say I was waay off…LOL He of course called at the time I provided and when I didn’t answer let’s jsut say I had a not so nice VM in the morning. I still did not call or text him back yet and likewise I haven’t heard from him. Sigh, the drama of it all.
” your cheery spirit is refreshing too”…
🙂 Ty
Well your communication with that guy isn’t anywhere close to the playful rumbles and interactive clarity you have shared with me. And we haven’t even layed eyes on each other. Go figure.
Keep up the feisty. I hope you can figure out one fraction of his hidden agenda. We probe and examine. That was “the 3rd degree” part you kept hearing. He’s obviously jealous and insecure of you having your own life. You should probe his true motivations in return. You’ll catch him off guard, guaranteed. Speaking directly in investigation (as I mentioned prior) can and will save your zippy curiosity and sanity a ton of energy and time:)
peace.
I agree with most of what Pluto is saying…MOST. Myself and my Scorpio have just reached the point of clarity in this back and forth emotional rollercoaster we’ve been riding. I did similar things to what you’re doing Aries and felt that same…screw him, I’m moving on and then OMG, I can’t get enough of this guy kind of emotional wreckage…but I can tell you this, it was all worth it for me.
I had finally decided after 8 months (he never dissappeared) of me feeling like an emotional mess, simply because I could not figure out where he was emotionally with me…he never verbalized it, and although his actions did show that he was happy with what we had going, I felt like we were uneven in how we felt about each other and where I wanted to go with the relationship, I wasn’t sure was the place he wanted to go with it.
So last week I told him I was considering putting an end to it. Well…boy was I surprised. He freaked out a little, informed me that he would do anything to fix the issues I felt were present, told me he felt we were a ‘team’, and that it would hurt him so bad if we were to end it.
So there you have it – I finally have what I want…a confirmation on where my Scorpio is in our relationship. I can stop questionning his motives and learn to enjoy the intensity and the connection we both share.
My point being that even if you really think the man is not interested, it could be just his front…stick with it (as long as he’s not dissapearing) and see what happens.
FF
Well I’ve decided to take this head on tonite. After reading your posts think I am just gonna suck it up and call. Still have not heard from him since Saturday…lol I’ll try to be gentle but sometimes my temper gets the best of me. Wish me luck! 😀
“Well your communication with that guy isn’t anywhere close to the playful rumbles and interactive clarity you have shared with me. And we haven’t even layed eyes on each other. Go figure.”…..
I’ve noticed that too 😉
We’ll I want to hear from a scorpio male who gone had an relationship with a Pisces female. Or is in a relationship with one. For I can know what I’m into. But as far as for me and my guy I guest we are doing good nothing too much nothing to less.
i had a hard time with a scorpio female a while back..ive decided to take a harsh approach to them,because me being a scorpio,we both are capable of playing lots of games..now however im more upfront.soo if it doesnt go anywhere,i get a sharp bright iron sword,and cut that scorpion female out of my life.im too damn busy,too damn ambitious,too damn here in the now to be playing games.
once again femme fatale you dont fail to disgust me.you havent reached clarity,in the relationship,you just decided to rock the boat and pry out the answer you wanted.eventually he will tire of you.you want to come off as intelligent and articulate,but you cant even handle your own emotions.
harmonica…are you single?
…and who’s the woman who did you in between June 2009 and October 2009? You started off trying to be helpful, offering suggestions, advice, etc. Now you sound down right bitter and every woman on here is getting the brunt of what women have given to you. Newsflash – perhaps you don’t have all the answers. In my case I just refuse to be taken for granted by anyone regardless of their sign…I know what I have to offer and I know it’s a lot.
My decision to leave my current man was a long time coming and not an idle threat. I was fully prepared to end it based on the fact that I simply was not getting what I felt I needed from the relationship…therefore taking control of my emotions once again.
In this, my scorpio confessed how he really felt about us and then we both let go of whatever fears we were holding onto about letting the other know the truth about how we really felt.
So, Mr. burned Harmonica, your assumptions are wrong. My Scorpio and I are better for having gone through what we just did…there’s no more guessing on either party.
Perhaps you should try not to take everyone’s stories so personally. Maybe even try to let go of your supreme hatred towards all women and you might even be surprised as to what might come your way…that or maybe bat for the other team for a while. You might prefer it.
Male Scorpios are not flawless people. We can easily hurt women. Very easily. Our attitude may send a clear a present message as to teach our woman that we will not be manipulated. Yet there is something missing in a cynical, quiet attitude that our woman doesn’t want to feel-> and rightly so. The important difference between something real and special and something ‘control motivated’ is that we male Scorpios have to specifically understand our dominant nature and our own moods. It’s critical that we are fully aware of our ability to manage the Direction of the dynamic with a woman,and Lead the Energy and Truth in the moment. A woman needs to hear and feel constant re-assurance that our intent is on only her.
I now know through such volatile lessons of my own past, that we can definitely still be assertive and real to ourselves… BUT, I learned over time that I must develop myself and- Speak… My… Mind. For many years, I had been very quiet and reserved about my thoughts and personal plans with women and girlfriends. I had originally held back a ton of very important information about what I truthfully wanted and expected from them. I didn’t respond accordingly to behavior I didn’t like and I failed at setting the example as the man, their man. Women absolutely need to feel the courage in our honesty and the intention of decisiveness and assertion in our actions.
The consequences if we are not those things? Well, her tests of her place in the relationship will cause her to feel afraid and insecure in the relationship. She will explode into her dramatics at the drop of hat. So is that her fault?… Today, I now know it’s not her fault. The fact is, women of all signs don’t have anywhere near the emotional self-control that we do. So we have to Expect their “games”… we have to anticipate their “drama” and “childish acts” of revenge. If we are not setting the emotional tone, a woman, any woman will not respect us… she will only test us to prove our love.
In past relationships, “I had thought” that I was open and honest… but I now realize that much of my silences during that time were emotional walls to guard my inner-self from her careless, thoughtless anger, and her selfish whims. In truth, I eventually learned to understand that I couldn’t handle her changeable moods every hour. So for many years I was not clearly aware of why she was yelling or pouting all the time.
The more I had studied women and reflected on my past failures with them, the more I came to realize that “I” was the perpetrator in the dysfunction. I was being “a recluse” within the passion of the relationship and I actually confused the women. They did not know exactly were they stood in my heart-> Because I was too passive and guarded to TELL them.
Now that I’ve grown up a bit, I now find it easy and fun to put a woman in her place. To be challenged and tested. I now know that my intense responses are not “motivated” to hurt them. I am motivated to share myself openly and lovingly. If they don’t feel an affinity with me, they can find someone else to play with. No skin off my nose. My expression with women today and forever more is upfront and assertive in the moment. While still being kind and true to myself. So knowing how to reach a woman’s soul is easy now because I realize I have nothing to fear or hide;)
Well that’s the whole point pluto. That’s all we want from you scorpio males is to be upfront and be real. And stop playing a game if you are because yall will never have a woman holding your feelings in. Or make us wait like its a damn waiting game. Because I went out this weekend. And my guy got jealous I could tell. And he said he didn’t won’t no one up on his lady. So when I asked him am I’m officially his lady he said we not go give us a title yet. So that tell me he’s not ready to commit and I’m just start doing me since he still want to play the waiting game. We been talking going on 5 months. And you still not letting me know what you really feel about me. And I can tell he in his cold mood I haven’t heard from him. I’m bout tired of it. Yall think we should put our lives on hold for yall and that’s pretty selfish of you guys. We open up to yall try to show you that we here for you support you. And you still don’t get it. I just don’t understand. And you wonder why we get angry or sad because yall make us.
“Yall think we should put our lives on hold for yall and that’s pretty selfish of you guys. We open up to yall try to show you that we here for you support you. And you still don’t get it… And you wonder why we get angry or sad because yall make us.”
This is very true.
We’re not all the same. Many male Scorpios don’t intimately understand their True-emotional nature. Many are trapped tightly in their personal intensity, but are not truthfully aware and forthcoming of their own shortcomings.
Women…The “silences” or “waiting games” you always feel, is stuff you just can’t try to understand. Don’t push it with your guy. Either be very patient or make a choice a move on.
We experience a lot of heavy stuff inside our whole lives, feelings of power, control, rage, ambivalence, jealousies… you name it. We are sensitive men. It all depends on the inner-capacity of the male Scorpio to see his self-consumed vices.
When we can’t break free out of our Dark Unknown vices, we won’t give you the gift of our Light. All we will do is self-destruct and increase our secretive and isolated feelings in the relationship.
These are no shallow experiences. Women must choose what is best for them and stop complaining about how terrible it is;)
femme fatale,no woman did me in..im too ahead of you.you gotta understand i dont fool around.ive said this before i think alot of you on this board are crazy.even me,who is a scorpio is telling you ITS NOT WORTH IT.move on.i should know this better than anyone.
is it not right that you said everything in YOUR relationship was going okay?what more do you want?i get the sense of you cutting off his balls whenever i read your posts.i hope he comes to his senses.and i dont care how angry you get at me.
ive seen first hand the nastiest sides of a cancer.i aint discriminating,but the thought of a fat woman riding my cock is too much to bare.and thats the picture i get..im sorry i have to be this nasty,but i think i need theraphy to trully trust a cancer..trust me,ive seen one punch my best friend,or rather heard outside my apartment as my best friend got punched his girlfriend..him being an aries..what do you think he did?and i dont blame him.i dont condone that stuff,but she was one nasty bitch.LITERALLY.you dont want to know what she did for money..she was a dominatrix…hence probably comes my disgust from what i hear..
I’m a Pisces.
Well, I ended up calling, which of course he didn’t answer. He did call me back 2hrs later. We talked for a while as if nothing had happened over the weekend. He then started to make plans to come see me and that’s when I started asking questions. Well, what I found out is that he told me it’s my fault we don’t talk enough…lol That he has been seeing someone else due to our distance, but wants to still talk cause he “feels” for me..again LOL Well needless to say I cut it off. Thanks for all your help here! Next scorpio I come across I’m running away as fast as I can. 😀
Watever pluto I disagree with everything you. Say I know I’m right and I’m stick too what I said.
“Watever pluto I disagree with everything you. Say I know I’m right and I’m stick too what I said.”
What did you say!!??
Learn how to read and understand something before you “think” you disagree with something. Idiot. You’re just another little girl WHO WANTS TO FIGHT over her whims. You don’t want any truth, you don’t want any respect and you don’t want any meaningful communication. YOU… WANT pathetic dramatic playtime.
It it is that HIDDEN MOTIVATION and insecurity in women which makes me despise my effort to help you.
You specifically, don’t deserve an ounce of my kindness. You deserve the Worst attitude and behavior from men. I have no sympathy for you.
Disregard my previous post because I don’t have a care in hell if you agree or not.
You deserve everything that happens to you.
Good luck;)
Well said 😉
Pluto, I have my own opinion of how i felt about your response. just like you do mines. And that’s just how it is. And you can’t get mad if I disagree on what you wrote.” I read everything you said” I just disagree. And a course I’m not go be feeling what you are saying why? Because you are a scorpion man. And that’s who I’m dealing with at this time. I know that you tried to help. And its the way I’m feeling at the time. It has nothing to do with my insecurity. If you would know why do scorpio’s get jealous so much? What would you call that, a part of ” insecurity” Thank you. And good luck all of you.
“If you would know why do scorpio’s get jealous so much? What would you call that, a part of ” insecurity” Thank you”
Wake up. Read. Digest what is written.
I have openly and honestly talked about the flaws and personal troubles of lost male Scorpios.
Try looking at your own Denial for a single minute. Focus on that. Brave it–> and grow up.
Now take off your blindfold and earmuffs.
A better man is out there for you. But first, you gotta work on YOU.
out;)
Hi Pluto Puppy
You’ve mentioned “test you & test you to help us identify if you are in with us…all the way”
What exactly do you mean and if you can further elaborate “the test”?
Thanks in advance,
Faith
Well Faith, the tests I’m referring to are no different than what you and your feminine sisterhood do with men everyday of the week. Attractive women pick unoriginal, safe, weak males, and then complain why they’re not inwardly fulfilled.
Look, if you want sincere honesty from a male Scorpio but can’t handle the truth felt within it, or the penetration of it, then you’ll always be caught speechless. And I know that’s not what a woman secretly wants. She wants to yap and nag a guy until he conforms to her whims. Yet in Truth- she deeply wants to surrender to a strong and gentle force of nature.
I know through life experience that women have way more power over the generic man during social and relational examination. Generally speaking, women are socially savvy and attuned to manipulating men and quickly reeling in her very ordinary, unsure, and predictable male. A woman was born with a lethal stealth radar detector. It castrates the male who is looking for sex, and she begins her process of schooling him. She can usually see/feel through a male early and identify if she can control him through the dynamic. The control energy for a woman is very important to her. She wants to ‘feel secure enough’ or safe enough that whatever guy she chooses… she will know for sure that he will indeed Obey.
Now enter the male Scorpio.
The playing landscape has now changed for her. Almost all women feel our poise. Women feel our self-assurance and dominance during her stealthy games of conversation with us. Through the social process, she realizes she is dealing with a man that won’t be toyed with. Male Scorpios are in touch with their feminine energy. In other words, the sexual-power, the love energy which women exude is recognized as an amateur litmus test in our eyes. She hopes to set the tempo and see if we will chase and beg. Her playtime games help her identify if her a drooling, “nice” object of desire will fit nicely into her narrow and shallow life.
Because if he doesn’t fit nicely into her innocent and whimsy ideals, and she predicts holding the future control-triggers, she will definitely not choose him. The cuteness of a woman is that she doesn’t go for what she really wants in a guy. If her belly and attraction temperature reach moist, intense levels, aka… a Godly Attraction or chemistry… she picks a drone over a more powerful sexy male presence. And understandably, she chooses comfort, control and safety subconsciously. She doesn’t want her emotional foundations rocked at the foundations. She scurries from soul quaking inner-world changes.
We test women specifically for their emotional courage. Your bravery when truth and unrelenting loyalty is at stake. What are you really made of? Because our attractions don’t fade overnight. We are Still Waters Run Deep.
Honestly, in my world, women are just little girls psychologically and emotionally. You may know what our intensities represent… but the strongest of women would rather, and they do, play-over a weak male who offers nothing substantial and who always follows and accommodates everything;)
Pluto I very much like your view. It’s totally different from what it is believed generally.
I have started to rethinking everything about relationships the last months. The reason is that a scorpio man flirted me intensely but i couldn’t decode his behavior. I knew through his eyes that there is something more underneath. He is so powerful that makes me feel safe and in danger at the same time.
He is an extremely handsome guy and i think he chose me because he saw that I am not a common woman. I am very true, honest and full of feelings. I think I should work better on my sentimental power for me first of all because I know that I shouldn’t be that sensitive. I know that I need such a strong man next to me and I should be brave as well. I don’t like it when I can manipulate a man and the majority of women do it. Afterward they say they love him but they fall in love with an other guy.
Why not to keep up with some testing? My subconscious connection with this scorpio made me think of many different aspects.
I don’t know which is the truth but surely a different approach is necessary if you want a scorpio man to our side.
Pluto please give us some precious advice I am of the ones that agree with you.
For all who want or even care to read about the way I see the world and the women living in it, please feel your freedom and join our free astrology forum at:
ejectionseat.ning.com
Many fun and slightly crazy people such as I, share many perspectives that women here may find valuable.
Pluto Puppy is controversial and caring.
Check it out today;)
omg! similar situation, im pisces and he’s scorpion. i guess not very smart considering i was in a relationship with a scorpion b4 and gone thru all the same nonsense. any advice ? he has not returned any of y calls/text this week, we had a row last week when I told him I’m not going to sit around waiting for him to call, I’m going out with a friend (who happens to be a guy ..) pls help .. it’s killing me
You’ll live;)
The kind of clarity you need is more than you could imagine;)
This is a fantastic “place” to be to learn about the scorpio sun sign, and I just spent the last few hours reading every single word of everything people have had to write here. I am a pisces and my very first boyfriend (from long back when i was a teenager) was a scorpion and i learnt alot from that experience. it didnt feel like i had at the time because i was young, inexperienced, and the intensity, possessiveness, “rules”, etc., were things i allowed myself to encounter without knowing what it could do for me. All i knew was i would never ever date a scorpion ever again in my entire life (you have no idea how passionate i can be about staying away…far away). However, looking back on that experience and all the other ones i’ve had (with librans; i have a libra moon) tell me one thing: they were opportunites for me to develop my understanding of myself. and i dont think I’d want to run away from anyone…not even scorpions, anymore. In fact, the more i read about them, the more i want to be with them. From my experience with librans, and although they will always hold a special place in my heart, i find i am not quite fulfilled by the experience. As though they are not truely my match. As though they cannot teach me what i could learn from a scorpion in terms of depth in knowing oneself.
But this new found interest stems from the fact that I was told recently by an astrologer that my future husband could be a scorpion. I’ve been reading up on them since, and find the information intruiging.
But first and foremost, i applaud everyone here for their willingness to enter the mysteries of love especially with a sun sign that can teach you much about love and consequently yourself. knowing oneself is the ultimate goal of all human relationships and it is usually through profound experiences such as love that we can become whole. As we all know, experiencing love with scorpions are very transformative and anyone here who has had a successful or failed relationship with one should neverthless thank themselves for the experience as it has undoubtedly helped them grow in one way or another.
I’d like to thank everyone for sharing their experiences, and especially Pluto Puppy for his deep insights into the scorpion “being” (mind, body, and soul) and for stepping up and confessing the scorpion man’s faults. And also, femmefatale for being 100% true to herself and her partner in her relationship with her scorpion man. And on that note, i’d like to talk a little about why i feel she was successful. That is not to say her “tests” are over; we will forever more continue to learn regardless of whether we are with scorpions or any other sign, but the points i want to bring up will have to do with her success at this point as well as how i believe she and anyone can continue to have success throughout their lives with these men.
So here it goes, a list of advice for whatever it is worth:
1. The objective: as i’ve mentioned before, the reason, in my opinion, for becoming involved with another, regardless of sun sign, is to find self. This is a universal truth, at the soul level. Why? Because as souls, it is our innate desire to become one with everything in the universe and eventually God. And the way to do that is by knwoing ourselves (our joys and our fears). the way we can know ourselves is through profound experiences such as love, and for this reason we seek union with others. when we can unite with another successfully we can eventually unite with God.
It is important to remember this point because if we believe this we will be more open and accepting to the fears and pain we experience in any relationship because we know it reaps a positive result: growth, unity and oneness. So everythime we are sad or in pain we can remind ourselves that we are going through this for a reason, a good one that will help us understand ourselves better and thus be better equipted to deal with life and become one.
2. Blame: when we have the above mentioned view point to our experiences we automatically stop blaming ourselves or others for our experineces as we recognise it is helping us develop our soul. Nagging is a form of blame and many women here understand why it doesnt work with men in general, and particularly scorpion men. Men are not as expressive with words as we are and so they cant really “tell” us what we are doing wrong in a relationship. But we can. We nag. However, because they dont tell us what’s bothering them, directly, we get the wrong idea and that’s when all the nagging begins. it isnt our fault as this is a logical way for us to solve our problems, by talking, but we should realize that may work with other women and not men. when we “speak” to men, it is better to do so in their language: actions. They act out the way they feel, and if we do the same when dealing with them, they will understand us better. Nagging equates blaming and that’s not good for anyone. talking calmly may help without blaming, but better yet is to “show” them what we mean.
3. Hot and Cold: All men go through periods when they “leave” their woman only to come back later. This is because when they have a problem they dont speak, they act (as i’ve just mentioned). They go into their caves to solve the problem by themselves and come back when they are “ready”. Sometimes it doesnt even have to be a problem, and they just may feel they need to get in touch with their manly side, away from us – the feminine side. If they are deeply unsatisfied with their woman, they might sleep around to feel manly again because those needs may be supressed in some way while they are with their woman or for some other conflict that questions their manliness. But they are not always screwing around…they really just need space even when in a relationship they are happy in. Scorpions seems to have this need more than most men. But the more comfortable they get with you, the less they’ll leave. eventually they may stop leaving altogether, and you’ll notice smaller increments in the time they take to come back.
4. Scorpion men, like all other men, but more intensely, much more perhaps, are looking for the truth. By truth, in terms of a woman, i mean the real thing. You could be anybody, good, bad, ugly, pretty, or all of that together, but the scorpion wants the truth and nothing but the truth. and as you all know there is no point pretending you are someone you are not because they’ll know. So the faster you show your true colors, the faster you become true and the faster they can trust you. and when they can completely trust you, you’ll be in a very happy relationship. If we’re honest about who we are with them, from the very first day and till the end, they will learn to trust you easily.
5. BUT, and this is a big BUT, who you are, truely, must be someone they can RESPECT. This means you must be someone who respects themselves. This person is not afraid of losing anyone, does not act out of insecurity, has no need to play mind games, is confident and sure of who she is. When she “listens” or “obeys” her scorpion man, she does so out of true respect for him in being the man in the realtionship who protects her and looks out for her. She does not “obey” him out of fear of losing him. If she does so, he thinks she is weak and can be lured by other men easily, or is not sure of what she wants from a man or herself. and this makes him doubt your love for him and that is when he becomes even more possesive. But if you are confident and can show him your love without insecurities, he will respect you for it and then truely love you the way you deserve to be loved. If you stick to “YOUR RULES” without any interst of playing games with him to lure him or get a hold on him, but genuinely out of respect for yourself, he will sense your true strength and be more ready to give you some freedom and will love you more for it.
6. Freedom. You can never be free from a scorpion. if you’re in love with one, in a way they own you. but just as much as you own them. men own women in their own way but women do so in thei own way as well. However, this “owning” has nothing to do with posseiveness. It has everything to do with loving yourself. When you love yourself you emit a kind of energy or aura that makes other want to love you. and in this way you own others. why do you think you so readily give yourself to your scorpion men? It is because they love thmeselves first. it is only natural to do so. if you dont love yourself, you can never love another. Their immense sense of respect for themselves makes them appear confident and this attracts love their way. When a scorpion man sees a woman loving themselves this way, they begin to love them as well. This love for self has nothing to do with pride. It is about refusing to allow yourself to go through anything harmful to your soul: pain etc. Femmefatale, for ex., was able to demonstrate this attitude to her scorpion man. She refused to be insecure about losing him. She loved him but she loved herself as well. She wouldnt settle for anything that would cause her to believe she was experiencing more pain than joy in her life. because then it becomes worthless to do so. It is true that we learn from pain. but if the pain exceeds the pleasure, then we are no longer in a state to learn. in order to learn from our experiences of pain, we must be able to lead a ‘normal’ life which calls for pleasure as well as pain. Femmefatale believed if she was in more pain than pleasure then that meant she was meant to be with someone other than her scorpion. She was not afraid of what life had in store for her. She was positive and had faith in herself. Her scorpion not only sensed this but was attracted to it, fell deeply in love with it and wanted to be near it. See he also needs to feel secure with himself and only one who is secure with themselves can love themselves and thus can also love him so that from this love he can know himself, her and eventually the universe…God.
Another woman, capricorn, wrote about her similar experiences of success with her scorion. it took her 2 scorpions to learn this before she could keep her thrid one. everytime he “left”, she was relaxed and went about her life with respect for herself. She didnt curl up under the blanket and think about him all day and night. because she was secure with who she was, he was secure with her. and this helped him become secure with himself.
So i guess the name of the “game” is to love yourself so that he can love you. Dont act from fear. Act from a love that is free of insecurites of any kind. He will love you for it more than he knows. you will be helping him become more secure so he can know himself better (and that’s no easy task)…and eventually become free.
I’m not interested in a woman who mentally perceives herself.
Mental perception void of felt emotion is called Illusion.
A woman’s illusion arrives courtesy of her RIGID IDEALISM. How does she RESPOND to the REALISM of evident visceral pain?
Does she escape through drugs or alcohol? Does she spend her time through meaningless friendships? Or is her escape through materialism? Survival? Or is it via the mirage of controlling men to feed personal narcissism?
Pain and upheaval are natural RESPONSES like smiling on a bright sunny day.
The more physically attractive a woman is, the greater her Illusion, her rapid denial of Personal Truth.
Emotional intelligence knows no fear.
But a fickle surface intelligence does.
That fear, is assigned to a brain which does not want to feel. Regardless of degree.
Personal Comfort defeats Truth.
Sad;)
As I see it, all forms of mental activity are inferior forms of being…in fact they aren’t ways of being at all. Thinking is our true enemy because it bars us from knowing our TRUE SELF. Ideologies stem from thought making them seriously flawed. They are prey to the domain of our limited mind that knows only pain and pleasure and likewise breed such states. I am not one to say, “I think, therefore I am”, neither would I say, “I believe, therefore I am,” as both these states reflect thought…instead, I would say, “I know, therefore I am or I “be”, therefore I am”.
Emotions…same story. They are just the other side of the coin with thought on one. They are physical manifestations of our thoughts. If our thoughts are painful(fear, anger, jealousy, lonliness, self pity) our bodies react to that thought making it our emotion. And the same is true of pleasure.
in this way, thoughts and emotions make up reality(as we know it). And REALITY is an illusion. We can’t escape it through self-pity or narcissism. If we do, we get caught up in the vicious cycle of pain and pleasure…feeling “joy” when we’re “high” and low when we’re not…an inevitable barren and ongoing process that leads to nothing.
The only way to ESCAPE is by letting go of our EGO (mind and emotions) and allow our TRUE SELF to reign. The one that doesn’t “think” about the past or future, or react to such thoughts. The one that just IS, in the present, fearless, fully aware and in the moment. The one people call STILL, CREATIVE, MINDLESS, THE OBSERVER. You seem to be calling this EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE. This is the SELF that smiles on a bright sunny day.
The TRUE SELF knows no pain nor pleasure. It only knows LOVE. The kind that is not subject to pain or pleasure. It is selfless and eternal. And to activate it within us, we must simply be in that state. But unfortunately, we have to go through alot of pain and pleasure before we can realize this and live only in that state. We get glimpses of it though…every now and then; like you know when you see a very beautiful person who renders you speechless…the mind goes blank, you dont think or feel at that point…you just are. But i know we’ll all get there eventually – where we are always in this state – ONE with everything – GOD or whatever you want to call your connection with your TRUE SELF as.
This is the TRUTH as I KNOW it. Nevertheless, Im happy I have a libra moon; you would “think” I’d become prey to ideologies through it, but thnakfully I am able to use it, my emotions, and my mind (mercury in aquarius) as tools to reach my TRUE SELF. The realm of the TRUE REALITY.
🙂
“Emotions…same story. They are just the other side of the coin with thought on one. They are physical manifestations of our thoughts.”
Yes they are manifestations. But do people, especially women, welcome the idea of feeling hurt? Does a woman truthfully encourage those freeze-up inner upheavals?
No. That idea is precisely why our logical understanding of emotions is limited and AFRAID.
I know you mean well. I can sense your happy spirit through your words. I’m not taking any good intent away from you.
Emotions are our blood, surging through our body. Our blood is no different than the rain falling from the sky. Our emotions are the crystal clear water which keeps us nourished during our LIFE. Water is LIFE. Life is the Realism of emotion. Water, in from purist understanding, is not Idealism which we try to categorize, like some elementary Math quiz.
The water unloading from our shower ‘cleanses’ (rejuvenates) our dirty exterior. The tears which trickle down our face is God healing our unreachable Soul, not not cut ‘n’ dry Reason. Tears are not our logical interpretations of feeling. Those tears, that massive water dam, powers entire cities and is the omnipresent LIFE FORCE keeping us alive each and every breath.
Yes the Air (our Intellect) keeps us breathing, but tell me something, does Real inward Catharsis and Introspective Salvation happen by virtue of fearful reasoning? Does plain methodical “thinking” resolve emotional torment? Does that thinking change a persons Emotional reality over time?? Be honest?
Our human intellects are extremely limited. Life experience, Real life experiences are to be FELT. They are to be dealt with. Every drop of pain has consequential meaning which the intellect alone is incapable of deciphering.
Water has unseen virtues which reason will never know.
Because pure Reason is repeatedly terrified of acknowledging apparent sadness, apparent jealousy, apparent guilt, shame and loss. The intellect is the master trickster, always finding rational excuses to debunk and devalue the sheer ferocity and realness of clear and present emotion. Personal ambivalence is never taken seriously through the rationale of it’s “thinking.”
Plunging into our depths is no cliche. The journey is as Real as the incredible feeling you have experienced during a hot bubble bath. As Real as your ‘Experience’ through a mind altering, emotion riddled orgasm by way of penetration. So hey, was that “FEELING” Logical???? The water in your uterus is no different than the water (the Life) in the male seed. If the Sun and Air and Earth were all that mattered in terms of our existential “Reality”… would we even exist? Of course not.
Water cleanses the mush of endless brain clutter which we unconsciously assimilate through our culture. Brain clutter which thrives on it’s chronic attachment, it’s meaningless hunger to “learn” the nearest piece of useless information. A fleeting thought always convinces the psyche that it is happy and healthy within a felt emotion.
When the veil of betrayal or victimization has been lifted, the hypocrisy of our brain’s initial reasoning finds the Truth from our innermost, originally felt experience. That feeling does not Lie.
Thanks for your perspective;)
Thank you Firefly for dissecting my posts and understanding what I was actually trying to say. It’s clear that I am not great at communicating my thoughts into words, I’m often misunderstood. You’ve pretty much hit the nail on the head though, and now I feel like I should offer some elaboration on what you have made clearer for me.
I completely agree with you about needing to be true to yourself and taking past experiences and learning from them. This is something that was a long time coming for me. I’ve made some poor decisions in the past regarding my romantic life. Each time I moved forward learning so much about myself and what I needed in a partner and what I knew I did not want in a relationship. Each time I ended a chapter in my love life, I forced myself to remember that there was always a point that I came to that made me realize how happy I was to have experienced what was currently negative. Each time I held onto the fact that I would find better and be better. I think this is why I’m not afraid to move on if it is required, I’ve tested the waters and it only gets better. Mind you, when I contemplated leaving my Scorpio, I knew it would not be as easy. He does have this hold on me like no other man ever had. Regardless, I knew I could do it if it came down to it.
Before I met my Scorpio, I had ended a very long and complicated relationship, and it felt like more of a divorce. My ex was very controlling and just a very miserable person in general. We struggled, correction – I struggled to make that relationship work, he drifted along pretending that there were no issues, and when I finally left him, it was such a bad situation I gave up everything (and there was a significant amount of material worth). I just walked away because I had realized that my mental health was worth far more than any amount of money. I moved into my friend’s basement with my pets and the little I had and pretty well started over. Quite the change from the luxurious lifestyle I was living. I told myself that the next relationship I would enter into would be different; I vowed that I would never again stay with someone because it was easier than leaving. I told myself that I would never again be afraid to ask for what I wanted, instead of hiding it for fear that my partner would not agree. And most importantly I told myself to never let anyone drag me down so low, that I knew I was worth more than he ever gave me credit for.
And I stuck to it this time. And it’s working. Maybe it’s the change in me, maybe it’s that I finally found someone who is truly a great person, and maybe it’s a combination of many things. I’m not sure exactly what it is, but this is the reason why I’m here and why I’m sharing my experience. I read some of the posts on here and can see myself a few years ago and I know what those people are feeling and therefore I’m trying to provide for them what I have learned, hoping that in some way it would help them make better decisions for themselves.
I like your view on the fact that I’m not ‘playing games’ and that perhaps in some situations I am ‘testing’ my scorpio. I’ve shown him nothing but the real me from the beginning, because I wanted to see the real person in him. My ‘testing’ of him is for the most part in response to his admitted ‘testing’ of me. He has a tendency to ask me the strangest questions in the most awkward of moments. For example on our 5th date, in general conversation he tells me that he thought about getting a vasectomy. I knew what he really wanted was to see my reaction because he wanted to know my view on children. I didn’t give him the reaction he was expecting…that’s my only game. He continues to do this with other things and I continue to throw him off with my reactions. When I asked him why he does this, he tells me he’s looking for my reaction. So it’s a game we both play, and it keeps it fun. When it comes to more serious matters, we talk, no ‘tests’ involved.
I’ve realized that this relationship has gone so smoothly for me because when I feel I may be being a typical female and creating an assumption in my mind about us or about him and his intentions, instead of dwelling on it, afraid to bring it up, I just ask. And he just responds. 90% of the time it’s a miscommunication and we move on. It’s nice to not tip toe around a subject and it feels good to be able to be so open with anything and everything.
It’s also nice to know that we are both putting 100% into this relationship. We have both discussed the fact that without a doubt want this to work and are in it for the long haul. Just having that one conversation with him really opened my eyes and helped me to be more secure with the relationship and to stop questioning everything. Unfortunately, it did take me contemplating ending the relationship to have this conversation, but sometimes it comes to that and I don’t feel like that’s a game. I knew what I wanted and I knew I felt I wasn’t getting what I needed, so I simply told him that. That’s being true to myself, it’s not ‘manipulating’ as I was accused of by another.
We’ve been very happy since and I’m sure there will be more trying times ahead, but I really feel we are better equipped to deal with anything that could come our way. We’ve really meshed into a ‘team’ and we are learning so much from one another and leaning on each other when it’s sometimes needed.
And your last sentence really summed it up nicely,
“So I guess the name of the “game” is to love yourself so that he can love you. Don’t act from fear. Act from a love that is free of insecurities of any kind. He will love you for it more than he knows. You will be helping him become more secure so he can know himself better (and that’s no easy task)…and eventually become free.”
In learning to love myself and become secure with this relationship, I can also see that I am helping him be more secure. He never saw himself as attractive and I think he is the most handsome man I’ve ever seen and I make sure he knows that – because he now needs to learn to love himself instead of being so critical.
Babysteps, but there is definitely progress!
Now I’m sure there will be someone waiting to rip this post apart – but to them, you’re obviously not hearing me. I’m in a relationship that is successful and is the healthiest relationship I’ve ever experienced. I feel I want to share the path I took to get here, in hopes that it can help even one other. I look at the first few posts I made on here and can see the progress myself. It’s a confusing journey, but I’m here to say it is possible if you are well equipped and that goes for anyone of any sex and any sign.
FF
I’m glad I was able to surface some of your points clearly FF, and thanks for elaborating on your experiences. I am happy to know you view your experiences as positive learning lessons. This is the only way to grow and be happier with each step forward in life. None of us intend to leave our present relationships but when things are beyond rectification we cant help but move on and hope we’ve learnt to become better people from the experience. i know it wouldnt have been easy to move on if your scorpio wasnt ready to meet your needs, as you love him. but you’d still have to do it for your and his own good. He would not be to blame if he could not provide you with what you wanted as if one isnt ready, they just arent ready and there isnt anything we can do about that. But I’m glad that wasn’t the case for you and that both of you were in the same “place” and ready to continue to give and recieve.
Good luck and thanks for the response!
Hi Pluto Puppy,
In reference to your question:
“Yes the Air (our Intellect) keeps us breathing, but tell me something, does Real inward Catharsis and Introspective Salvation happen by virtue of fearful reasoning? Does plain methodical “thinking” resolve emotional torment? Does that thinking change a persons Emotional reality over time?? Be honest?”
I am not one to replace WATER (emotions) with AIR (thought). Each serves its own purpose and they, along with FIRE (passion) and EARTH (stability) are the “elements” that make LIFE. We are all combinations of all four of them in different proportions. And we are usually “tormented” by these elements accordingly so that the element most prevalent in us will dominate our ‘energetic’ constitution and the way we choose to experience LIFE. Given that I am primarily WATER with fragments of the others, I have not been spared Emotional Reality. In fact, it is the only way i know to “be”. I don’t “breathe” air, I breathe water. Deep waters…that sometimes light cannot reach, leave alone any other creature, save fish. Far from being AFRAID of such depths, it is my reality, it is where i live.
And with that you can see we are speaking the same ‘language’. It is just that your Water is probably the likes of a powerful fall like the Niagara Falls (for lack of a better analogy) and mine is the place at the bottom of the Atlantic Ocean. They’re both pretty scary places but also profound in their own respective ways. And yet this is not the point. It is irrelevant where we reside. It doesnt matter whether we live within a seemingly calm volcano that is about to explode, or at the fringes of the earth’s atmosphere where oxygen begins to seize to exist; whether amidst the density of the Amazon or at the bottom of the deepest darkest sea. What is important is how we break free from our depths, and that we do. In a world where difference enhances meaning, it goes without saying that we must experience them (our depths) to know we must break from its clutches but all the while knowing this REALITY is not the true one. It is only the one that leads us to the real one. The REAL REALITY: The TRUTH.
The Truth is free. As I’ve mentioned before, it knows no pain nor pleasure. It is beyond thought and emotions (the ego). Maybe the word EMOTIONS have limiting connotations for us; so here is a way to understand the “EMOTIONS” of TRUTH which i like to call LOVE.
EMOTIONS VS. TRUE EMOTIONS
EMOTIONS are falsely “positive” and negative. They give us “pleasure” or pain.
Negative emotions (painful): fear, anger, jealousy, possesiveness, selfishness, loneliness, feelings of self-pity, arrogance, perversion, insecurity, guilt, being opinionated and so on.
“Positive” emotions (pleasurable): vanity, desire to control self and others, sense of security, lust, flattery, consequence-oriented feelings, self-glorification, and so on.
As you can see, the positives are the same as negative emotions except they sometimes disguise themselves as ‘positive’ to make the ‘experiencer’ believe they are. These forms of pleasure don’t last long and inevitably lead to pain. But true emotions are eternal; they don’t lead to pain as they have nothing to lose and nothing to hide –as you’ve said, they don’t LIE.
TRUE EMOTIONS (LOVE) are: selfless, fearless, defenseless, accepting, joyous, not concerned with any particular outcome or consequence, self-respecting, non-judgemental, compassionate, merciful, strong, just, secure (even when in danger), modest, helpful, and so on.
It is only in this state of pureness, free of all ‘elements’, that we become free…blissful…eternal…one. It is our natural state. And the one we long to go back to, reunite with. This is why we enter relationships, in hope of finding a way to be in this state again. But seldom do we truely love anyone. Except for during brief moments in our experience with eachother, most of the time we are experiencing emotions that stem from fear and not the true emotions.
What activities may lead to being in this state?
You got it…a warm bubble bath. Or did you say hot? Same diff. When you’re taking such a bath and you find yourself becoming the water, the bubbles, or in other words, really experiencing and enjoying all your senses, to their fullest; when all that exists is the warmth of the water, the smell of the bubbles, the taste of it, the sound of it, you know you are in this state. You have become still. You have become Love. One.
Try ‘feeling’ this way while you’re experiencing negative or ‘positive’ emotions and you’ll see you can’t. You’re mind, fearful in all its ‘glorious’ states will distract you from experiencing the moment.
Laughing, dancing, smiling, reaching an orgasm (as you’ve mentioned), doing anything creative (original and from within) will connect you to this place.
But how can living in this state become the norm? How can we live in this state even when we’re not doing something particularly creative?
Use your true emotions in everything you do. Let them guide your senses, your feelings, your thoughts, you. When your senses are guided as such, even walking down a flight of stairs, or washing your hands, will “feel” like an experience of who you are in your fullest. While you do this, you refrain from thinking about where you’re going as you walk down the stairs, or why you’re going wherever you are. You know why you are and you dont have to engage your mind in thinking about it over and over again. Instead you engage only in the moment. In the process of walking. You become the steps you are taking. You sense how it feels to step against the solid surface your feet touch. You’re not ecstatic from this experince, but you are at peace. And sometimes, that can mean ecstasy. You just “are”. And this is no ‘fleeting thought’, it is always with you if you know how to keep it.
And in this way you become ever present in every moment. Aware and alert of every inch of your existence. You have surrendered, to yourself. Your Higher Self. The Truth.
And you can go through all the pain you want, and i know we will, but LEARN this you must, because it is the only way you can become FREE. ONE with everything under the sun and beyond, you live in your creator and He in you. There is no greater power than this one which unites you with the ONE. From “here” you are the master of not only your own domain but all domains. Any one you choose. But first you must LEARN to surrender. Surrender your ego, your “emotions”, and embrace your true ones – your true self.
From one drenched soul to another.
Thank you, Cuteness.
I was simply putting consciousness out there;)
Let it rain.
I have read the recent posts and I really enjoy seeing and hearing, Because I’m still dealing with my scorpio man. And things are getting better I should say. Slower but surely. Just have to take it day by day. I have relized at the end its all about me. Because if this man ment to be in my life then he shall be. I’m happy I relized that.:)
Sounds great Shanda! I noticed you’re a pisces and correct me if I’m wrong, but if you’re anything like me, I’ve found it easy to “give” myself to others and that THAT can sometimes…wait no, ALWAYS, be problematic. People misunderstand us for it. They think our feelings are not quite genuine, that we’re playing with them to satisfy our own control issues or need for security, when in fact we may have genuinely liked the person. And after we’ve “suffered” enough, they realize we’re true, and then finally treat us better. It isn’t their fault as they need to be sure so they don’t get hurt as well, as they feel for us too and yet don’t want to look like a fool if our feelings arent as deep. But I’ve found that it helps if we don’t show our true feelings too easily. I, personally don’t pretend or anything, but I’m careful to “give” only as much as is given or asked for. That way, I’ve found, the misunderstanding is kept to a minimum.
And it feels so much better when you’re not trying to convince anyone of anything, doesn’t it? I’ve learnt everyone needs to figure out their own problems in their own time and own way. All we can do is like you said, live each day to the fullest and let the future shape itself. And this is the best way to help anyone so that those who are to come together, will.
I’m glad you’re taking interest in yourself. Thanks for sharing!
Hello Pluto Puppy,
I’ve read your posts and I’m impressed and intrigued with your perspectives. I must say that if the Scorpio man that is (unfortunately) the object of my affection/desires was half as emotionally mature as you appear to be, I think I’d be much more fulfilled and less aggrevated. 🙂 Yes, he’s the object of my affection, but I wouldnt classify him as really being “in” my life. Curious- have you ever been involved with a Taurus? If so, how’d that go?
Cheers,
LadyTaurus
Well LadyTaurus, I want to sincerely thank you for your fine powers of observation. Yes, I am mature, although I’m just 35. Yet, my Soul truly feels about 535.
My involvement with Taurus women have been magnetic experiences. My own mother is a Taurus, her nature is very placid and silent. And that muteness is one main reason I left my parents house unannounced at 17yrs of age in Sydney Australia. During the eighteen years since, I have traveled the globe, seen/felt the nuances and eccentricities of it’s culture and it’s diverse people. Thus far, in deep a spiritual context, I have arrived at a meaning which links every single human being out there as ONE. I now reside in Los Angeles maintaining a laser focus on my career. Everything I’m apart of each day is lived with a calm, yet highly intense passion. Life’s failures, it’s wonderful people, my past intimacies, my changing beliefs through social dynamics and personal pain, has relentlessly schooled me through thick and thin. I hold zero regret and resentments. I live life with an intensity and a controlled vigor that boils through my nature.
The Taurus nature through my experience, is very sensual and sexual. The Bull doesn’t like surprises in it’s safe familiarity. I must add, that deep and glorious Communication with the Lady Bull has not been quite so intoxicating.
You see, my Scorpionic nature really does want everything of the same goodies and creature comforts that a stubborn Taurus woman strives/plods/inch-by-inch for, her entire life.
HOWEVER, unlike my opposite nature of Taurus… I Love To Change. I have an insatiable born need, To Grow, from the Inside-Out. Not solely from the Outside-In. Over time, I have become a better man (I hope) in terms of becoming acutely aware and knowledgeable of my inner drives, darkness and motivations. And through this process, I feel I have become much more complex through my evolving beliefs and intricate value systems. Yet I now have a light heart, and in a contradictory sense, I feel that life is simple, once meaning has found a place in spirit.
So telling you all of this is relevant because I know that your Taurus energy craves for-a-SIMPLICITY in daily routine, so in terms of that predictability, the Lady Bull really doesn’t appreciate the inner throws of ugly emotion or aggravation.
This is a stark contrast in our opposite nature, and that contrasts exists within us for a reason. I find immense personal value in Rocking the Boat. Taurus however, finds value through SILENCE and simple foreseeable events and circumstances taking shape which ‘Are Not’ a threat against their yearnings for inner peace and beauty. Taurus strives for TANGIBLE results, Scorpio feels powerfully driven to unleash the ambivalent meanings of their INTANGIBLE worlds. Scorpio WANTS to discover the troubling realities of emotion and psychology battling within. So answering your loaded question is not a one page deal.
I do feel more sexual intensity when I’m with a female Taurus compared to any other astrological nature. But in those experiences thus far, the simplistic (in every sense of the word) Taurus girl has tentatively NOT WANTED to grow-develop psychologically and emotionally, therefore she doesn’t essentially VALUE becoming a more fearless human being as a result.
The Taurus woman is a treat physically, but honestly, the rest of her hasn’t stimulated my inner-worlds. Not even close. And a Scorpio’s rich inner-life is EVERYTHING to them.
Because Scorpio knows that if they can master the intangible depth and range of personal understanding… they can conquer the tangible fruits of hard work and ambition which is then known to be a foregone conclusion.
Hi Pluto Puppy,
Thanks so much for your insight, which I will value all the more because you have in fact been with a Lady Bull 🙂
I think you are so on point with this. You have us pegged to the letter. I’m shocked that you’re only 35!! I’ll be 41 in May and my Scorpio friend just turned 45 this past November, and I’ll tell you this, if he was able to express himself in the raw, yet eloquent way in which you do, I’d want to stick with him a tad longer!
In terms of physical intimacy our passion is UNMATCHED. It’s completely off the charts. What makes this “relationship” more arduous, is the fact that its long distance.
Communication via IM/phone etc, is not that great,painful at times, but when we spend time were together, conversation is great. There is a chemistry outside of the physical. I do understand that I’m stepping way outside of my comfort zone with him, as I do crave stability (black and white- not gray).
While I have the emotional and intillectual abiltiy to tap deeper in the more abstract or “intangible” world, I become frustrated after a while..You know that:)
My scorp tells me he feels a “fantastic chemistry” with me and that it feels right when we’re together. However, he’s way too hot and cold for my taste. Without much prompting from me, he will pull back a few layers of the onion and then as quickly as he does that, he retreats! When I say retreat, I mean I wont hear from him for well over a week and its typically me who breaks down and initiates contact and I hate that.
I’m going to see him in a couple weeks but after that I think I need to walk away. Its hard because of that magnetic force. Maybe even at 40, I’m confusing the sexual chemistry with somethjing that its not. 😦
Cheers,
Lady T
I know through my felt experiences, that the salt-of the-earth sensuality of Taurus surely needs physical touch and physical togetherness. No question. I compassionately do understand why your LDR is not fulfilling you.
Funnily enough, I’m currently dating a Lady Bull, 29, who loves holding, kissing, hugging, eating and humping. Each time we casually hug, I feel a unique electrical energy between our bodies. Her silent energy is quite engaging, and I usually don’t openly say that about any woman.
The down side though, which I felt would eventually happen, is that our conversation runs earth-dry. I don’t mind initiating conversation and feeling her mind, but most of the time it seems as though I’m talking to myself. She’s innocent and loves to listen, but I feel that two people have an obligation to mutually converse amid any and all dynamics.
I’ve happily accepted her Plain-Jane outlook on life, as I do with everyone.
Thanks for sharing your Radiance Lady T. You have a heart worth probing.
Your delicious feminine energy could transform any lost and weary male Scorpio.
A good match for you might possibly be a gentle Pisces nature, or one of your fellow super-pragmatic, non-imaginative Earth signs… Virgo or Capricorn. You’ll definitely feel encourage pursuing your dreams with a male who shares those dreams.
LMAO- Pluto Puppy! I love doing the exact same things your Lady Bull loves and in that order.:) What is also ironic is that my ex-husband is a Pisces and my last serious relationship, which ended last year was with a Pisces as well.
I’m obviously widly attracted to water signs, but I must say with both of those gentleman our earth and water made mud after a while.
I’m glad to hear that you’re willing to compromise a bit with your Lady Bull and appreciate her essence for what it is! As she matures and and experiences more of life, her “Plain-Jane” outlook will broaden..And remember that her deeply loving and compassionate heart combined with her loyalty, outweigh a lot of the differences you may find a bit frustrating. 🙂
Would you say my Scorp’s propensity for retreating after opening up is indicitive of his Scorpio charecteristics, or is it because he may not be able to relate fully to this Lady Bull?
Cheers,
Leah
“…but I must say with both of those gentleman our earth and water made mud after a while.”
I am Pisces Rising. My personality (aka… our facade toward the world) is kind, genuine and gentle. However… my inner reality or core inner-self has 5 planets in Scorpio including Mars in Scorpio and in the 8th House. Pluto is semi-square my Sun in Scorpio. My willpower is magnificent. So the point I’m sharing here is that the Pisces SUN nature, in general, has a super-sensitive soul, swimming disillusioned through it’s imaginary riddled world.
I know a bunch of Pisces men and women. Their core nature, from my intuitive/felt perception, is that they’re happy to suffer in silence with people whom they love or care about. And in social and intimate terms, they kind of dance around a core sense of a True-self and real identity, in a given moment. This is not easy for me to explain.
The message I suppose I’m hoping to send is that Pisces can easily get lost in their own minds/heart. BECAUSE the power of emotions are not mercilessly DEALT WITH by the mystical fish nature. The best metaphor for the Pisces “Water” element is much like a foggy mist, or water vapor. So in contrast to high voltage Scorpio Water (a Dam, or a Violent Surging River) plus a Scorpios governing intrinsic energy(sign,planets,aspects)which then translate into;- Still Waters Run Deep.
That basically means Scorpio can also be drawn or lost in their own mind/emotions… but, Scorpio Warrior INTENTIONS (Rulers Pluto & Mars)…’consciously seek’ or have clear motivations, “to get to the bottom” of their issues and experiences. Pisces is known to drift away from it’s ambivalence like mist through the air, or like a empty vessel floating abandoned at sea.
So the planet Neptune(Pisces Ruler) manifests it’s daily lifestyle, attitudes and actions through a dreamy and mostly ambiguous identity (self) which can leave HUGE consequential affects in Relationships, Finances and Business.
It all depends on the male Pisces inner fortitude to find a SOLID core-Truth, then speak directly to people about what that Truth undeniably is. This is much easier said than done, in terms of a reality and ‘What’ a Pisces male actually does when clarity and strength are desperately needed, which will not further burden his woman’s confusion and anxiety.
Regarding your last question about retreating. You said he is 45. I believe that it really boils down to how much meaning, or weight and significance a male Scorpio sees and feels with a particular woman. Much depends on his commitment to reveal his thoughts and fears without concern of other peoples perceptions. It is not uncommon for a male Scorpio to bottle-up his true desires (for decades even), OR, he may secretly have a sexual attraction to other women which he is not telling you about.
This is why my life has been, and utterly and forever will be, devoted for a quest to speaking HONESTLY. -> Regardless of public backlash, criticism or control mechanisms.
Yet, to reach this wonderful place of inner confidence and assurance, one must Know the beautiful lessons inflicted through the Valley and the Shadow of Death.
If I were to guess, I’d say that your guy hasn’t fully surrendered to Death. Which means he is still carrying within him a lot of fear and discomfort relating to how he truthfully feels about everything, including you.
Expressing that stuff, must first be made conscious, in his conscious mind, before the bravery to speak it can come to fruition. The Subconscious Unknowns of male Scorpio Darkness, are to be fought in battle. Only after years of inner battle can a male Scorpio have the Freedoms to live life on his terms.
I had a fear of abandonment for many years, until I repeatedly learned through the painful wisdom of my emotions. The wisdom I gained is that one must learn to Kill-Their-Ego-Self,(which is completely flimsy in the face of adversity, in our Real-World)and completely Surrender such self-important illusion to the-> Higher Power.
Spirituality, The Source, Or God, sincerely does find a human beings mind/emotions if they are truly, willingly seeking salvation of the heart and soul. Unfortunately, the sheer majority of human beings live impetuously for the dictates and hypocrisies of their baseless, indulgent ego-self.
We all have ego. We need it to survive. The question becomes does that ego have a ‘Universal Identification’ with all living things including people?…
The sad reality is that billions of people are secretly afraid of other people. This fearful barrier is the huge mountain blocking these people from a Higher Existence, a much more Meaningful and Purposeful Existence.
Pluto Puppy,
I really appreciate you taking the time to address my concerns/ answer my questions as thoroughly as you have and with such depth and eloquence. You’re so on point, you’re validating what I already know in my heart.
I feel like I’m wasting my time with this upcoming visit and for once, I can honestly say that I’m not really looking forward to seeing him as much.
The diaglogue I’m having with you is definately going to help me “wean” myself off of this man which is for the best in the long run.
Thanks again. 🙂
Cheers,
Lady T
It is my pleasure.
thanks for spawning such a good conversation:)
Youre welcome, Pluto Puppy! Best of luck with your Lady Bull 🙂
I know this is a place to learn about scorpions, but since pisceans are known to get along with them, it may be helpful to understand scorpions in relation to pisceans.
I was reading post 254 by Pluto Puppy where he talks about his views on pisceans and will use some of his points to clarify and further elaborate the piscean nature.
“Pisces is known to drift away from it’s ambivalence like mist through the air, or like a empty vessel floating abandoned at sea.”
Pisceans are ruled by both Jupiter and Neptune, where Neptune is King of the Sea. Knowledge (Jupiter) of such mysterious watery depths (neptune) is not fully understood by those ruled by this planet – leave alone others. Our symbol represents a pair of fish (some say sea horses) that live in the innermost regions of the sea (symbolizing the after – life) and this in itself says a lot about the mystery we experience regarding life here and after death “there” or wherever. We’re perceived as “disillusioned” because we are not at home in this illusion that we call Reality and instead are more comfortable in our spiritual body–the part of humanity that is least understood by not just Pisces but all. But we enjoy unpredictability and ‘the unknown’ as everyone knows and yet whether we can or cannot express who we are to others (mostly due to an in-born sense of humility if we can’t), our knowledge of “SELF” is always paradoxically clear to ourselves; a complex, almost unidentifiable clarity borne of pure intuition allows us to “understand” self . We may be confused or lost at times about how to go about life in the so called “Real World” but I think anyone with so much perceptive knowledge about the Other side could become easily guilty of this had they been in our place; and yet due to our adaptable nature, we learn fast. Of course, sometimes we “drift”, but when one comes to “knowing” the way we are meant to through this planet, this trait is only natural.
“The message I suppose I’m hoping to send is that Pisces can easily get lost in their own minds/heart. BECAUSE the power of emotions are not mercilessly DEALT WITH by the mystical fish nature.”
Other water signs identify with us but they usually need to play truth and dare before arriving at any meaningful conclusion about others whereas we, well known for our empathy and patience, usually (and almost to a fault) indulge all of humanity in their efforts. If trying to compare or contrast us with scorpions I’d say just as people say scorpions have a deep piercing stare that can “read” people, a piscean’s eyes almost always appear “heavy”, as though carrying the “watery” weight of the world in them. Not much of a prober, so that our depths reach us differently, we are natural sponges, allowing every experience to sink into unimaginably deep depths or an abyss of sorts, within us. Further, Scorpions are here to learn to KILL their ego, to conquer death and transform through it, thus the armor and intensity of Mars and Pluto. Pisces are not equipped for this because they possess a subdued ego concerned not as much with death but more so with life after death; specifically designed to SURRENDER it by means of helping themselves and others understand the Truth through their words and acts of uniquely diverse and varying nature. One could say we ‘kill’ or surrender our ego in a way that calls for a different kind of strength – humility, and this usually portrays us as being able to suffer for others. However, due to our giving nature and subdued instincts to protect ourselves, we are blessed with Jupiter, planet of luck and expansion (knowledge), and as we rarely choose to attack, we are usually able to get out of life threatening situations in ways unimaginable by others. Our mutable nature allows us to see any situation from seemingly innumerable vantage points.
In dealing with our depths, of course just as some scorpions never kill much within them, some pisceans also choose to hide away from themselves and others and ‘escape’ the Truth. But that obviously isnt the norm. And even those of us who deal with it have very unique ways of doing so because Neptune speaks in many languages that are all elusive to say the least. Individualized to the height, we have distinctive ways of approaching it even within our Piscean selves. This uniqueness is apparent in the way we go about life as well so that many feel no two Pisceans are the same. Still, we all possess the same knowledge of self and this usually makes us easily recognizable to other Pisceans as well as other water signs.
“they kind of dance around a core sense of a True-self and real identity, in a given moment. This is not easy for me to explain.”
Anyone interested in understanding pisceans in terms of their core beliefs or sense of Truth may want to read post 247. It’s pretty clear there, and I know i speak not just for pisceans there, but for humanity as a whole.
Thanks for listening!
Nicely said.
And just as you, I have the right to speak my mind without your silent need/motivation to one-up.
If you have a problem with my comments, just say so. Painting your “Humility” in that tone is Blind Jupiter Hypocrisy.
At least I do have something to bravely say BEFORE any individual has the freedom to formulate their Fearful critique. I expect criticism. It reminds that me that I’m doing a little slice of Good for people.
I can’t recall myself consciously going out-of-my-way to DISSECT the Pisces comments written on PAGE… Wait, what page??… 247??
Any person of “HUMILITY” can critique another and Highlight their past comments as better than another.
Not everyone can speak bravely.
Jupiter, the largest planet in the Universe is also loaded with intellectual Fodder.
I do think. I feel:)
Once again Pluto, you are completely missunderstanding the Pisces thought pattern.
Firefly – I experienced this bitterness on another site from Pluto.
Perhaps Pluto, you need to investigate the Pisces nature further because I really don’t feel like you have a good handle on who we are and what we’re all about. You have great insight into your own Scorpio intellect and I do appreciate your descriptions of that, but please do not try to be an expert on Pisces and what they represent/feel/mean. We are the ones living the Pisces life, not you.
No one is picking you apart or your posts. But as I mentioned to you before, on another forum, we are all allowed to offer our own opinions and experiences and you may not agree with them, but learn not to take that so personally and just try to read what is really being said…if you’re at all interested in what others have to offer.
Thanks.
FF
Thanks for letting me know FF; and I’m not surprised.
It comes as a huge surprise to me that you feel this way and couldn’t read my note for what it was – a personal description of pisceans. What you had to say triggered me to clarify and elaborate and i dont see anything wrong with that. You’re pisces by ascendant and may not identify with this sign as closely as i do. And that’s probably why you were short in highlighting our strengths- and you dont have to, you’re not bound to by any means, but that doesnt mean i cant choose to elaborate if i want to. As you can see, there was no underlying motivation. But you seem prone to presuming and i should have known given you totally got the wrong idea about me from my very first note here and assumed i am someone i am not. I indulged you in spite of your highly presumptuous energy in light of learning.
But are you sure you welcome criticism? Because someone who does, doesnt jump at everything they read without understanding it first – they make room for dialogue and diversity. Your ATTACK mode that acknowledges its presence even when there isn’t any criticism intended reflects you’re used to compliance and encourage conversations where they are mostly one sided.
I’m sorry I ‘threatened’ your “feelings”, but hey, nobody ever said the depths would be an easy task to handle. But in this case, it was uncalled for.
Take it easy…
You didn’t threaten me.
You hoped to debase my own view.
Do I go out of my way to find fault in your messages?
Get it clear in your hypocritical head before you “think” you understand your own intentions.
Because you obviously don’t.
Your reaction, or should i say over-reaction speaks for itself…in terms of “feeling” your views were debased. I don’t have to tell you that.
And Yes, you did go out of your way to find fault…you presumed…twice. I didn’t. Not even once. “Think” about it, maybe it’ll help you see the truth in others more clearly.
I don’t have to presume anything.
Your TRUE motivation- the Tone BEHIND your words- Not the words themselves- are Clear.
Human perceptions are not Truth.
Human Motivations are.
If you viscerally understood the real meaning of Humility, you’d realize that your Intentions are All, whether they be promoted negatively or with goodness. If you knew your intent, you’d quickly admit the Truth of it. To yourself and in others. If you knew anything about your underlying motives, you wouldn’t be trying to backpedal and protect yourself exemplified through the Tone in your words.
My Negative Intent back to you was Deliberate. My first response back at you was Consciously-> Known. I had known that you would react to me in ‘the way’ you actually did.
And to this point, you still claim innocence, so that’s why you need a lesson.
I’m opening the Truth of your emotions. And eliminating the illusion of what you “think” is right behavior from me, and the manner in which you’ve shown me through spewing plain reasoning-> in place of a genuinely felt- ambivalent moment.
That is the way you handle anxiety. That is the way you handle discomfort. Your responses above are the True You, when the World asks you what you’re made of.
This episode is not about me. It’s about your lack of awareness during the most important emotional moments, which control you.
Good night:)
OMG – Pluto must be God himself….or wait – you just think you’re some higher being.
News Flash – no one holds you on a pedestal, get over yourself.
Such a crack up…..pluto pup.
Come on…. we see your tail raising over and over. hahahaha
So funny and transparent….
Get down from up there son…
Come on… down you get… thats a boy settle down and grab some water to put out your Ego son.
All the best with it..hahahahahha so funny. Your childhood is so clear. You have just undone all your earlier posts silly boy.
Ladys dont be sucked in by puppy
Ha ha. Son. Another fan.
Yeah, we should listen to the Mirage who chimes in. The Oracle of Invisibility.
Thanks for the shameless plug.
See, you’re doing it again. You’re presuming my understanding of intentions. And you’re doing so by claiming you can tell my true motivations from the TONE of my words, that they are rational and hence, unaware – not TRUE. That because i back peddled, and found you presumptuous, that I “think” and don’t “feel”.
I’m sorry but i find your psychic analysis incomplete and far from the truth. If I truely back peddle and tell you what i “think” about your intentions, from say, just your posts from the last two days, like you have mine, you’ll agree with me. But you won’t admit it to me. Just as you’ve toned down your anger after realizing it was uncalled for and are calling it a deliberate intention. Calling this “episode” as being about me, and so forth.
I know I’m not a “pure” breed like you (water in 4 or 5 places in your personal chart), but this is not a contest on who can “feel” more as you make it seem from your need to show me I handle emotions rationally. Charts don’t work that way. And even if one were to handle their emotions rationally, it still would only reflect the method in which it is expressed, not the actual emotions.
Before you make this “episode” something it isn’t any further, you should ponder your true emotional identity – your moon sign, and then you can tell me all about how much i “feel”.
Good night to you too.
I have zero respect for you.
Make sure that your finely tuned Intentions are not using my comments ever again.
Child;)
I say what I say because I love people. I care. If women are genuinely unaware of that passion, then I have no control over that.
I thoroughly enjoy independent, outspoken women. When she becomes a little ferocious bunny, I feel the love/power of her energy.
Her comments are heard. Her emotions are felt. She is understood. So I have an obligation with her to speak openly about what is going on.
I’m glad you et al are smoking on the peace pipe again. I enjoy healthy debates, but not insults.
The antagonistic dialogue bothers me because I’m a lover, not a fighter…( most of the time)
😉 LadyT
It may appear to be “antagonism” from my end. But if people could see the self-honesty in my sentences, they’d realize that this expression is not based from an antagonistic desire.
My desires are to find real meaning in life. And women, Relationships are a huge area of real-world life.
The purpose of life can’t osmosis-ed if we were to talk about the big belly on Winnie The Pooh, all day long.
Don’t seek the truth if you can’t handle it.
Your responses are empty. Everything you state is in contradiction to your attitude.
Femme Fatal, your comments promote Nothingness. What you share on this forum is the immature support of Lies.
You guys should get married.
Neat!
“Well said”. Am I “sensing” jealousy? Oh wait, I’m a pisces, how could i ever possibly ‘sense’ anything.
Don’t worry, you’ll get there eventually. And when you do, you wont have to shout for respect, it’s part of the package.
And that’s a wrap.
Puppy Pluto,
I completely understand where you’re coming from and I’m not singling any one person out. I find some value in everything everyone has to say.
You’re honesty has helped me make some painful, but necessary decisions regarding my relationship and I appreciate it.
Hope you all have a fantastic weekend!
I am a leo woman with a cancer moon. I have become involved with a scorpio man. I believe that my relationship is special, to be treasured and respected and is sacred. I never feel that I am alone, even when he is far. He already knows me completely as I do him. I understand and accept him – even his deep waters ( it sounds better in spanish) and he empathizes with me. He says that he has a high respect for me, and that as time passes, he falls more in love with me. It is funny that when he touched my hand for the first time, I felt that I had woken up from a dream – and that time stood still. It was for a fraction of a second, but it felt like an eternity. I was not looking for a relationship because I was too busy working for my children.
But it has happened.
I have never seen the cold side of scorpio -and neither have I seen the secretive, silent side that I have seen talked about here. He is attentive, protective and very expressive. I had not expected such truth and honesty, tenderness, passion, strength and love from a man in my life.
I guess there are emotions that he has that would scare the ordinary woman, but they do not scare me.
The relationship is intense in all aspects, but scorpio is not interested in sex per se. The woman has to be able to genuinely feel and flow with the universe.
Anyways, I just wanted to share. It was a pleasure to read everyone`s comments.
Gatubela
That’s a refreshing slant Gatubela.
Leo gals and the other Fire signs, Aries and Saggy, genuinely appreciate authentic honesty in themselves and others.
The symbol of Pluto, it’s meaning, it’s desire to destroy any old, stagnant thought patterns and emotional attachments can be extremely meaningful over time.
Pluto, and it’s Atomic Bomb nature could be summarized as:
“Elimination and Illumination through Transformation.”
So if things are peaches with male Scorpio, and doing great, I would advise maintaining discerning realism within the dynamic itself. If not, many whimsy idealism’s can take hold of mind, in the context of the relationship. This can “devastate” (Pluto) a woman and buckle her at the knees in emotional/psychological pain.
I say, always be emotionally prepared for a Tidal-Wave of ambivalence. Because those experiences are as natural as your Period, whirlwind.
That is simply the nature of human beings.
Yes, I believe I understand what you are saying. However, I believe that the relationship “is”. Waves of energy enter and leave. Some gets elevated, others transformed. Idealism as far as I have seen, has no place here, pain neither. Actually, change and transformation is the rule – as our energy has not stood still up to now. The question is “Can you feel it, absorb it, embrace it, explore it and then, if you are strong enough, work with it?
I enjoyed reading your insight.
Me gusto tu forma de decir las cosas.
Gatubela
Well Gatubela, I’m grateful that you’re speaking in terms of Energy and it’s unseen life-death gravity. The conscious vitality of choice through mind and emotion, and onward into an action, resulting in consequence.
You really do get-it. And I’m happy for you.
If this stuff were rationally assimilated like a woman reading ‘Elle Magazine’… the incomprehension of her cutting romance realities can lead a woman puffing up her cheeks into a fizz of fury, and ultimately breathing out fireballs of frustration;)
She’ll say to herself… “hm, what is Wrong with… HIM?!” LoL
Ahhh, women are helpless bunnies;)
Female Helpless Bunny Syndrome could be a medical term. Caught the vibe P.Puppy.
Is any of that really real? What are we under all of those limitting “furry cutsie wutsie bunny-tudes”? In my experience (I am in Latin America) men, in general(not all), like play (even cruelly) with the bunnies. And women, in general (not all), well – you seem to already know what they like to play with – and they also can be cruel.
Well, there is a lot of real people, real love and beauty out there – but most of the time, we prefer to connect to and read – what was that magazine again?- instead of finding it, flowing with it, fighting for it and maintaining it.
The great majority of males give away their personal power, their seed, to any attractive woman.
Men inevitably succumb to the divine feminine love-energy of polarizing women. Men (just like Pavlov’s Dog) seek to accommodate. He seeks continuous approval. He is bland and Rational with her. He is Unsure.
She Wins.
And deep down, she Doesn’t Want to win.
Does this male have innate capacities through his daily expression, through his very being… to Ravish a beautiful woman?
He will be put through constant subliminal examinations, and during which, he will not even be aware of his abysmal failures. He willingly obeys the dictates of society therefore he obeys the dictates of life’s tremendous challenges. He submits to life, and in so doing, he submits to the potency of the feminine love-power. A male like that has a transparent-identity and a painful lack of consciousness. He breeds inept, non-existent energies. And Women know it. But Women can’t and won’t do a thing about it. All that responsibility is solely on him.
The love essence of a woman is very, very powerful through the core masculine male. This energy occurs and is released when she surrenders herself to her potent love-force, through which her vibrant essence is found through the energies of her own body.
She is Present. And Alive. Therefore, she deeply desires for a (real) Man to be Alive, Penetrating, Present, Strong, Humorous and Decisive in turn. She desires that reality in his every movement, standing tall, gazing deeply into her eyes-> while being unaffected by her shifting and often erratic mood swings.
Outside life distractions are melted away by his intensity and presence in the moment and in her… energy.
A unique guy is the epitome of (inward) strength.
A truly rare kind of male is acutely Present within her energy. He is fluid yet a mountain of strength by way of his refined higher-identity and presence.
He is at ONE with her in every moment. He is at ONE with her in the dance of every movement. He penetrates her with sensual love, clarity of response, and a superior consciousness.
Now, back to the real entanglements of our society…
The social reality out there is not what I have just shared. And it’s unfortunate. Because women deeply want to see/feel what are a man’s true-unshakable gifts to the world.
A Woman genuinely wants to Trust.
Yet a billion males will prove time and time again through their social impotency, that the rough challenges and harsh realities of this World, make them indeed-> Untrustworthy. (He gives away his seed, his power, in all reactions of fear).
But she still stays with this guy. His fears become hers. Stagnation and material comfort supersede mutual and spiritual growth.
So in wrapping, I don’t blame women one bit for their frustrations.
Ha! Totally on point in my book.
When she’s cranky and down in the dumps… he Transforms that micro-moment.
His sheer inner-freedom and optimism are the result of his own inner-transformations (through the Journey of Hell, He finds His Buried Light).
So when she’s afraid of financial situations or any circumstance… he innately Knows how he WILL, Figure… it… Out.
He tickles her. He presses his abdomen up against her, pinning her to the wall. He licks her face then kisses her on the neck.
What now, is this woman’s state of feeling?… What is her state of mind?
She feels Free. Because she has consistently felt –> His inner-Freedom when it matters the most.
Oh, LadyT… your check is in the mail;)
Oh, just send chocolates. lol
You got it cuteness.
Actually, I’ll send you exquisite dark chocolates… then I’ll have a baker knock on your door tomorrow morning around 8. He will hand you a basket of freshly baked –> Hot Bread.
mmmmm, I can see the big grin on the little Bulls face from here.
And you know what comes after great food?… LOL.
Hmmmm.;) Heck ya I know what comes after the food. Bring it on! LMAO
Well, I wouldn’t want to punish a well rounded little Bull. Or maybe I would? lol.
I’m sure you’ve been a very good girl lately (maybe too good for your own good)… so I’m not sure if you could handle the overwhelming sensuality and seismic intensity of our union.
41yr young foxes, can be still be little girls you know?… So along with this psychological innocence, she may find herself a different person after the explosion(s) LoL.
Mars-Sun-Venus-Mercury in Scorpio… is not what I’d call a fun and bashful frolic among the hay… young lady.
So you can get those black stilettos ready for Daddy.
Poker face:) LoL
Born November 19, 1974.
May he Rest in Peace.
You are too charming for your own good..and bad ;). Polishing my stiletos now. LOL
Born May 4th 1969 (40 years and 11 months is the new 31). Most people think I am in my early 30’s as I do not look 40 at all.
You’re almost on the cusp of Sagittarius, yikes!
I really do appreciate your natural simplicity, your loyal and dependable goodness, LadyT. I feel that our core (Earthbound) Values are steadfast and unparalleled.
We have only communicated briefly, but I sense that you are rich and vital with life. I believe that you are physically gorgeous, but I feel that you are infinitely cherished more for the beauty of your grace and authentic essence.
I can tell, that you are naturally Receptive toward life, it’s contrast, it’s misgivings. I believe that you understand the Value in struggle and hardship. You intrinsically know that Pure-Love dissolves all destructive barriers between ignorant people. Love is Fearless. And in many respects–> So are You.
And for that, I want to Thank You for your grounded, in-body, humility.
Those salt-of-the-Earth qualities, are never take for granted.
Yes. I can be Guilty as Sin. My tongue can be dangerous out in society and with people I hold close to my heart. Yet that is my Path. I am prepared to accept all consequences.
Nothing great in our lives can ever transpire from mediocre thoughts and safe-mediocre actions. That is called living in the ‘Known’. My very being, thrives for the Unknown. The adventure of the journey. It’s treasure. If there is a real fear I see and feel… it is the drudgery of mediocrity. The safety of not Seeking. If were to not seek anything, I am a dead person breathing.
As a young boy, and up until around my 30th b/day, I still had no idea of what I was capable of thinking, seeing or understanding. My intensity was squelched for too many years. And over the years, I have dissolved many “logical” illusions of Personality (which are extremely rigid conforming)in my reality. So cathartic lessons in time forced me to learn. To find my Own Mind. To Discern and Discriminate my own frames of thought and to structure an expansive view of the whole picture.
Because of this, I have encountered more resistance from people than ever before… and that’s OK. I have learned to follow my intuition and to Trust my instincts… above the cold, rationally and socially popular notion of swimming aimlessly in the herd mentality.
Society within all of it’s cultural variations IS–> The Collective Mind.
Certain Individuals, people with minds and hearts not of this Earth–> Create this very Culture we see around us today and tomorrow.
The collective mind is at the mercy of whomever creates and impregnates new forms of ideas and culture… namely creators of Music, Movies, Entertainment, Consumer Goods, anything of mass Consumption, the scrapping and lies to get rich at any cost and to indiscriminately ‘make it’ by deceiving others, not by being accountable for oneself and yet ultimately… deceiving ourselves.
So I feel strongly about many things. My goals are to be responsible in What I do, and How I say something. I won’t please everyone, and that’s not my purpose.
Thank you for the wonderful compliments Pluto Puppy. You’re a sweetheart. I deeply appreciate your perspectives, especially your candor 🙂
Lady T
At first, your words are magical and enthralling P.Puppy. How deep have you journeyed under the societal fluff? Either you are on an excellent start but missing something and have not seen it yet, or do not want to say it. Which is it? Don`t get me wrong – I am actually very curious. From my point of view, (I am certainly no expert) you are only mentioning titilating pieces of the jigsaw puzzle. Why?
I suppose the social or conversational topics of daily life are too obvious to me. In terms of that most popular topics hold no real appeal, no true meaning for me.
If I can’t dig up a Real Sense of the Truth in an experience, in myself, in another person, or a consequence… I am Dead Inside.
In true Scorpionic fashion- I utterly Want the Bottom Line from people. No fluff. No Preambles. No deceptive or controlling agendas. Just the Truth. Their Refined and Defined Truth. And Sadly, when I probe people… they clearly don’t know what they want. Awareness is not Reason. Awareness of energies beyond the scope of our tiny-ego-self is a mind conscious.
The masses live their lives Unconsciously. (believe me or not)
Four simple words which I stand for and live by as a Human Being:
Integrity. Justice. Fortitude. Temperance.
I have reached a major turning point in my life. All the pieces of life’s puzzle are now Seen, synthesized and understood from a Whole viewpoint, or Universal connection.
The Juice of life in each Present Experience and it’s Deeper, Underlying MEANING… is everything to me. In a basic way, my experiences are Deductive by manner of sifting through Personality clutter… down all the way down to the microscopic nitty-gritty of any matter or apparent situation.
The Why, What, How and Where of human foibles, motivations, outcomes and pleasures… are to me, in need of further investigation to find it’s- Real Origin.
The intuitive, and dare I say the psychic feelings I have learned to live with, (and not be afraid of, which I had felt afraid of for many years) is now felt/understood to be an unreasoned Truth, for me. Not what a person says to me, (oil off a ducks back) but rather, where they’re coming from, what they represent from a core level, and how do they see their own specific reality, their relationship with themselves and their reactions to people and events.
It’s stuff like that where I usually pick up frequencies of an interaction within about 20 seconds of meeting a person, seeing/hearing them, and ultimately feeling them.
I’m a Feeler first and foremost. The psychological process to discriminate and discern what is Truth, and of Value, and what is False within a moment or circumstance, which is basically assimilated through Raw Instincts. Just from an Instinct alone, I can comprehend another human being at deeper levels without any conversation at all.
I may sound analytical, and in many ways I am. And that’s because I am a Problem Solver at Heart. Life’s hidden mysteries and the mystery of finding the True Me, LoL… has become quite an adventure. I was honestly-> Unconscious, in my dealings with life up until about my 31st b/day.
So what I’m hoping to communicate here comes back full circle, in that, I find banal chit-chat painfully limited, it’s missing Individual (Leo like) self-love and personal expression. I find that 99% of all conversations in my life are by-products of Unconscious Conformity in others expression, through the powerful INFLUENCES of our culture and sub-cultures.
To be honest with you, the lack of independent thought and self-expression from other people is consistent with the collective mind of our cultural environment.
At a deep level, I don’t feel that the majority of human beings can “Truly” think for themselves, in terms of a being an Original, Resourceful, Innovative conduit of self-expression.
So once again, it all circles back to what people drill into their heads… namely T.V, IPOD, Music, Fashion, Celebrity, Money, Status, Popular discussion… ALL of that “Reality” is the broken-record clutter of useless knowledge, the popular fads of a certain culture, the existence of not Consciously knowing (or caring) why they exist here on Earth in the first place.
Shakespeare was quoted as saying…
“There is no such thing as Right or Wrong, in that Thinking makes it so.”
Key word- ‘Thinking.’
All People… like you and me… all human beings… primarily “Think”… of … what?
Survival.
And within the ‘means’ of our survival methods, people indiscriminately justify their ‘ends.’
This blind justification of thought, speech and action for the Intent to earn a living and “survive”… is courtesy of the mental and emotional conditioning permeating through our immediate environment. Starting with the Family mind. Then on to our Relatives and Neighborhood Mind. Then on to our Job and Workplace mind. Then on to our Government and Religious mind. Then on to our Relationship and Marriage Mind. Then onto the broader Social Acceptance Mind… etc. So the energies in each of these real environments influences, shapes, and defines the “thinking” of our Personality.
In Truth. Are these influences OUR Thoughts?
Or could it be that our thinking, is NOT our innate thinking at all?
Culture Baby. That’s who thinking it really is.
The collective mind is the vessel of emotional & psychological Persuasion within our Culture. Many adults, almost all adults, STILL carry the lingering DOGMAS and CONTROL ISSUES- Inherited from their Parents.
That present Conditioning of all stimulation was/is perpetually hammered into our mind/hearts… of which feeds an adult persons egos need to survive and prosper (regardless of tremendous personal cost).
Thus, people do not Own their possessions.
Their possessions Own them.
Ambition and Achievement is a healthy and natural motivation. I advocate material success for anyone. I actually have clear and defined personal goals that I will attain. I intensely want to win at life, no doubt.
However, a life led full of ambition, minus fundamental humanitarian virtues/ethics and morals… are huge injustices in this world (to it’s people) that I wish to change.
Ultimately… Money is not my God.
Deep Self-Honesty, Bravery and Mindfulness are my Invisible Guides.
Gatubela… answering your curiosities would take me about a further 20 pages.
So I will no further torture the good people of this forum and their wonderful contributions:)
You certainly are lovely P.Puppy. But you don`t need 20 pages. One sentence will do.
From what I understand – you have the ability to perceive on various levels, people`s “essencial being” or lack of it. That,for me, of course indicates, that you have had a moment (or moments) in your life where you had to face your own (or lack of it). Also, you have explored or are currently further exploring the depths and heights of this arena, again on various levels (seen and unseen) and have arrived to various conclusions and have even validated them or are in the process of doing so. With your intellectual and logical mindset, (I enjoyed that) you certainly have the ability to paasionately comunicate your “bare essence” and you defend it quite nicely. Bravo!
With the respect that you certainly deserve, I am still left with the same curiousity. You have not said something. But with your capacity, you must already know it is out there.
“One sentence will do.”
That’s cute.
One sentence can say much. Yet meanings of things in a sentence can be translated through many different frames of thought.
“You have not said something.”
LoL. This curiosity is doubly cute.
Rome wasn’t built with one brick.
The same could be said for human evolution.
We ARE our Thoughts Ideas, Thoughts & Words… Rule this World.
There you go little Leo.
Decipher it as you may:)
OK ok ok….
Please clarify (again :)), because I am very happy to be writing to you.
Don`t forget that for you, women are “helpless bunnies”. Cute P.Puppy. You quote Shakespeare. Adorable. Your passion and inquisitiveness have an element of childhood. Sweet. In your writings, you kind of complain and (dare I say???) pout about it as well (hmmmm…that would be BEFORE you loose patience and God knows what zinger you could write down! 🙂
Obviously, for you, I have seen or will see, what you have chosen to reveal. Or have I? Perhaps I have seen more? In the end, however, it does not matter. and it wont be any skin off my back (just like your “water off the duck`s back)
Been there, done that, (and still doing that) and as we say in Canada, bought that maple leaf T-shirt.
Once I arrived to the same (or similar) truthes that you have written, whe I was 19 (I am 37 now), something incredible happened. Afterwards, “bla, bla, bla….” and then, more bla, bla, bla. Why get into it, right? Finally, at this moment, I am learning to manifest and create with universal energy. P.Puppy, can you see why scorpio love is so precious to me? (precious even being an understatement here – it is so much more)
I wanted to share my truth with you P.Puppy because with out knowing you, I thought you should know. And you are lovely. Are we not all? You know that anyways. Thank you for your wonderful spirit.
With regards to your comment
“We ARE our Thoughts Ideas, Thoughts & Words… Rule this World.”
I had thought about it in another fashion. I had believed that it is the comunication of these thoughts that rule this world, otherwise, it would not be a very big kingdom if it was not comunicated. It is a viscious circle with the following componants
1. the person, complete with cultural (1), societal (plurality) norms EMITTING a biased, processed thought to the
2. RECEPTOR, who also with their biased cultural and societal references, reprocesses the MESSAGE.
What is ruling this world, to me, is the interpretation of these thoughts (messages) though various emitters and receptors under a needy hamartic latticework. (not hamartia) The message (composed of thoughts) is codified as symbols. So, our identity (reality)could be a collection of symbols (imaginary) in which once communicated, is limitted by language.
Yup…..huh?
You said to me… “One sentence will do.”
LoL, NOW… you want me to EXPLAIN everything? LoL. Quite a contradiction from your earlier comprehension, too funny.
Look, if we were to cross-analyze your question, it’s not going to help any of us. A logical and rational approach from the ‘neck-up’ will only paralyze you, boggle and bamboozle you, and stimulate an already cluttered personality.
My life, the meaning I gain through it, is motivated by finding a fundamental simplicity ‘Within’ my (complex) experience. Desires to structure what I feel to be True. Not what I see, or eat, or read, or watch, or elope, or talk about or hear. My head is EMPTY all day, every day.
Their is RARELY such a thing to me as stress, or anxiety, or crippling-worries. Fickle mental curiosities are not me. (I’m the Anti-Christ of-fickle) meaning, I don’t experience such things as ‘depression’ or personality disorders, or boredom or dormancy. If you can just believe me about this… than you need not worry little Leo cub.
Please understand, that my realities originate from the ‘communication’ I understand inside of me.
Every tangible thing you actually see, every product, building, car, dress, business, and shotgun… started with… The Seed of a … single… Thought.
From an “ORIGINAL” thought, these ‘Words’ are then “Expressed.”
Look. Who are the super wealthy among us?
They are people who create things. Certain Minds and Hearts who produce and sell to the public on a massive scale.
So, the masses are not born CREATORS.
They are??… born CONSUMERS.
Their “thoughts” are universally distant and Not of the same ‘Origin’ as that of a creator’s thoughts, and his or her reality.
We ARE, what we Put in our heads.
I’ll leave it at that;)
Simplicity, no thoughts, no fickleness, no personality disorders…connected (and already flowing?) with the universal / collective energies. Should we continue writing then? You could do it the other way. But then…you already have.
You know, the irony of our discussion to me, is that I really do find incredible beauty in the simplicity of people, their (my) choices, their (my) values, their (my) essence, their (my) organic humanness.
Beneath all of our mental abilities and liabilities, past all pains, addictions, attachments, worries, joys and outcomes… exists a divine Human Being.
Over time, through the vehicle of self-knowledge and self-awareness, I have come to be very grateful and thankful for each and every person I have come in contact with.
From a fundamental mind-body-energy level or point of view… we humans function, survive and exist through an incarnated or an animalistic manner of experience.
For instance… we eat, we excrete, we drink, we sleep, we mate, we fornicate, we hunt, we perceive, we kill, we gather, we accumulate what is “ours”, we merge into clans, or we are more solitary ‘by nature’. We tightly posses people, items, events and circumstances… for sub-motivations in various ways of “ownership”.
And then, We Die. (Physically)
A pride of Lions or a flock of Sheep are equally ‘Dependent’ on each other in order to “Survive.”
And So are People. Just observe people.
I was born in the Year of the Tiger (Wood.)
The Tiger is a solitary beast “by it’s very NATURE”. It’s “instincts” encompass incredible resourcefulness and guile. That animal ‘teaches itself’ the raw impact of survival and triumph in life.
So when you add the Scorpio Nature to the Tiger, you can begin to conceive what might be going on “Underneath it’s Surface”… so therein, you may get an idea of my core nature, on many levels.
When we visit a local zoo, and peer into a Tiger’s eyes… What do we “feel?”… How does this animal, it’s “Energy”… make us feel?… The sheer experience of being within 5 yards of a 700 pound Tiger, is an astonishing experience.
It’s power, wit, fortitude, and ‘peace’ in solitude is second to none.
Have a beaut day people;)
I can not equate or describe my being (simplicity) to (an) animal (s). Could it be that I am a just a girl?
Again, I am not an expert, but in what dimension are you a Tiger with a scorpion character? Where are you obtaining your definitions of “power, wit,fortitude and “peace…..” Do these same concepts apply in all of the levels and dimensions that you are talking about? or are they illusions? You have power only if it is given to you in a dualistic sense. Is that “real” to you? I am not doubting your strength of character, but I would like to explore your “predatory” insinuation of it.
Have you had your life threatened or the lives of someone you love. Do you know how it is to suffer intensely, loose all of your belongings and everything you have worked for because you beleive and love in something? and then to feel the incredible devine joy and bliss of your existence? Have you fought for your very soul? Have you felt a divine love with a woman that transcended you and her?
Is your power complete? or are you missing something?
“Is that “real” to you? I am not doubting your strength of character, but I would like to explore your “predatory” insinuation of it.
Have you had your life threatened or the lives of someone you love. Do you know how it is to suffer intensely, loose all of your belongings and everything you have worked for because you beleive and love in something? and then to feel the incredible devine joy and bliss of your existence? Have you fought for your very soul?”
To answer all of your questions (or insecurity)… from that pattern of questioning, all that I can do, is placidly SMILE.
YOU ARE ASKING ME, if I know or understand what “DEATH” and LOSS IS???
Once again, in response, all I can do is smile and send you gracious love.
Darling. I’m speaking of our ‘Nature’ from the moment we left our mamas womb and had taken our first breath… as bouncing, innocent chubby babies.
I have had and continue to have problems with Authority.
That’s the nature of the beast. The beast of making personal strides, to change was is stagnant and not useful. To reform and to heal. Nothing “New” can ever arrive without the annihilation of the Old.
Metaphorically speaking… ( PLease Stop taking everything that I Say SO Literally) a Tiger will Not Provoke you, that is, if you don’t Provoke it. It will instinctively destroy anything that it “FEELS” Justifiable in eliminating. A Tiger, like a Fluffy Lion, have deep HONORABLE intentions/qualities. Without hesitation–> they protect the weak and helpless.
The instincts I speak of, are the clear consciousness of NOT abusing apparent personal power & resources. Which many of those in positions of authority, actually DO, at the Cruel Expense of the supporting human beings whom aid in making them rich.
I will do and say what I feel is ‘True’ to me. Popularity points are not my concern. Sweeping Humanitarian Drives… are… my… Concern.
Regarding Love. It’s presence MUST BE within me. If it were not, I would NOT be sharing my Personal and Universal Beliefs with you and our curious audience.
WHERE, on this forum, or with family and friends, or with any person you may meet at the bakery or at the deli… Do you HEAR, of such topics and Personal, Uncensored Expression???
So you need not analyze pure-energy baby. Because it JUST IS.
Peace, Love and Happy Rumbles to everyone;)
P.S… Yes, I am slightly crazy. But all of it comes from a good place.
Written in plain English at the very top of this website, regarding the Scorpio Male…
“… He not only enjoys winning, he has to win. Yet he normally practices good sportsmanship….”
So Women, aka Helpless Bunnies… It’s in your best interest to not even try, better to accept;)
P. Puppy, winning, loosing, loving ….as you say, …just is. Can one win or loose when there really is only sharing? There is no conflict here and I would sincerely like that you not consider the possibility of such on your side. Besides, what can a little helpless fluffy lioness like moi be up to? (meow! ) Besides, not that you really care (and it aint gonna rock your world), but I kinda think that you are alright.
There are many things that you say that deeply resonate – but strangely from a different point of view.
I liked the way you say it.
I have spent most of my life knowingly accumulating, transforming and elevating energy …a very difficult and hard life. It has brought me to my knees in a myriad of extremes. I was not interested in relationships, did not listen to what people said, but what I felt from them. I dont think – my mind is blank because I am receiving information (spirits, dead people who have messages, people`s truthes, people`s thoughts and psychic intrusions) Spent years in solitude, and being alone, have been victimized (yet was never scared, even with the guns), have had all that I love dear taken away from – but I can get it again, have seen murders, death, violence, sadness, cruelty etc….
I can shoot better than any man, am learning to fight like any man (but be more deadlier – when I attack, no one will see it coming), I have 4 professions, have run a business, have seen thousands of dollars pass through my hands and am presently I am homeless and have been on the streets because I said “NO”. Well, I will get a place soon because now I am a single mom with 3 cubs to look after.
And when I walk by, men say to me “God bless you.” (I dont feel that I am all that) Do I care? No, but thanks anyways.
And is any of this important? What ever. Oil off the ducks back.
My integrity is intact and I hear the angels singing, even when yesterday, because I could not leave a “helpless bunny” friend alone, I experienced a situation that most people could not recover from. Luckily, I now foresee everything that will happen. My kitty cat instincts are working just fine. Time to land on my cute little furry paws.
As the now “attractive receptor of male power or seed”, (your words, not mine) …well, this is all new for me. But like you, I am not interested in talking chit chat with people, for the reasons that you stated. So, I don`t really “need” to talk with my partner. I do it the other way. Besides, he knows what to do to make me purr.
Problems with authority…that is interesting. Do you look at it from a conflictive point of view, or are you able to see it with your eagle soaring in the skies perception? Where is the river flowing?
I empathize with your situation, and I hope things work out for you. You seem to have plenty of guts and optimism regardless of your immediate environment. So I hope that your shining faith and change of direction will bring you and your kids fruit and security.
I now perceive Authority Mismanagement within my intensity and personal conviction, “objectively.” I detach myself and rearrange my method of response to bring growth and maturity from such individuals. For many years, I had felt psychologically and spiritually ineffective with dictatorial, intolerant people. I now have no issues working within the boundaries or confines of pragmatic structure and the status-quo tradition… however… it is when full grown adults selfishly ABUSE their power for (mind-emotion)Control Motivations toward good wholesome human beings that raise my inner-Hell. The ego-maniacal intent to blatantly dominate others, raises the Smoldering-Lucifer out in me.
Just through a few minutes of intense observation, I can see-hear-feel any persons Dark-Side. Because the Dark “Lessons” of my very own Nature are clearly recognized and understood. Over time, I have found beauty and riches from metamorphic Transformations of old, dead thought patterns of wickedness and deceit. The deceit I see in people, is really just their blind lack of SELF-HONESTY and GOOD INTENT. Their unhappiness is injected into others. Truth doesn’t “mean” anything to a person like that of self-indulgence. So I have a low tolerance for Blatant Methods of incompetent “leadership.”
I now call-out authority, but with TACT & DIPLOMACY. A person who abuses his or her position in society, is one who does NOT lead by example through every molecular cell in his or her behavior.
They are simply ‘Unaware’ of their emotional and psychological inadequacies when they project themselves upon others. They simply don’t care about Consequence.
The more in-tune I have become with each and every moment in an environment, the more I realize the tremendous power of the Spoken Word and it’s Resulting Action from people.
There is a tremendous Influence left from a persons mouth and behavior which can leave dire circumstances over an entire group… OR, in contrast, this influence can leave a tremendous impact on others when this person “chooses” their words and actions Consciously for the motivations to Inspire, to Heal and to be Just. A persons words of tongue can change the world for the better… one little fluffy wabbit at a time.
P.Puppy, thanks for your empathy. I will assume responsibility for the path that I have chosen. Think of me. You know as well as I do, how powerful that can be. Be good when you do it- I already know what you do.
What will get me through this will be based on my ability to mentally clear and arrive to my essence, cut through the weak egos of terribly abusive and cruel people, and go straight for the kill. No pity. I soared in the universal energies in order to assure my honorable intentions and to acquire the correct mind set. My web has been spun, I have waited quietly, even smiled while I was at it, all while suffering terribly. Now the cards will have to fall. If I did good, they will fall towards revealing people`s true selves and intentions. Because, as you say, they don`t care about the wellbeing of anyone but themselves.
Perhaps, you have noticed, as have I , a strange memory loss or amnesia that abusive people have? The lies and the strange justifications that are given? Its quite incoherant.
Well, I see it as a mental, illusionary network, based on mentalities or thought patterns. Human interaction is the attempt to link one thought pattern to another. The bond is pretty weak.
However, the downside of this is that you will always be…the bunny.
Arriving to your essense, and permanently holding the energy is like always singing great music or the feeling after running 10 kms. It is a state of being. I know that you are studying human nature and playing with fluffy bunnies, but in my opinion (more like absolute certainty), there is so much more to do. You are probably having more fun at the moment however.
So much to do…and you are the one to do it.
Take care everybody.
tired like a lot of women here loved it all the exsact things your saying then bamb just like that cold and gone because there selfish he even said as much and now am left ruined shocked and huirt if i could di it again would heck no run as fast as your little feet can go you will get hurt. I guess am still feeling raw and the only plesure i get is to imagine him suffering for doing this too me i actully question love now and people in general isn’t thats sad froma libra very sad indeed it was a toxic intense delusion they do sting you just don’t feel it then they have you then when there done they removing and then you feel it i feel for some of the ladies they have no idea what there in for !!!
Amazingly… what ya blogged realli made me happier! (ok i know u must think im a retard haha!) online
Glad you’re happy!
wtf is happening here…..i was just here for the picture…BYeBye
P-Puppy,
How have you been?
I have been wishing you well on your endeavors.
I will continue to do so.
First, the comments here have been incredibly insightful…thank you! Second…I can’t tell if my Scorpio is just taking needed personal time or if he’s not interested anymore. (sorry for the impending length…and I’m a Cancer, by the way.)
A little relationship background…Me: I’ve been a douche magnet (literally) for as long as I can remember. Earlier this year, I had 3 different guys (in as many weeks) ask me to be their booty call. The other guys I tried dating? Got close enough for me to open up to them, only to have them take off with another girl or – in the case of a real gem – break up with me by text message. The day after I slept with him. Awesome. Him: Broke up with his girlfriend a little over a year ago; from what I understand, she cheated on him fairly consistently.
Us: We were brought together at a concert early this year by mutual friends. It was a good night, but I didn’t hear from him again for 2 months. We saw each other a couple of times at events with friends (one of the times spending the entire night staring at each other and smiling while he made a point to be anywhere I was. He asked me out at the end of the night).
After that, we meet up at our friend’s bday party the next weekend. We had a chance to talk to each other a little more than previous nights, though I didn’t focus on him as much as I would have liked. 1) because I’ve always had this overwhelming feeling of wanting to keep everything we say/do between us only, and 2) I just consider it rude and in bad form to ignore everybody else. (Consequence? Surface/cocktail talk.)
Then, this girl from his work walks into the bar/grill. He stares at her the moment she walks in, then gets up to go give her a hug and talk with her. He comes back to sit next to me and I, with my previous experiences quite fresh in my head, immediately throw up my barrier. My thinking? “Holy sh*t. I am not going through this again. I am not letting myself be soft only to be trampled on and hurt again. If he’s digging this other chick…whatever, his prerogative. But I’m out.” It was a reflex reaction.
He went dead cold to me (I’m assuming he was just as intuitive with regard to my body language as I can be). Soon, we all move to another bar. He rushes ahead and when I finally make it in, I see him sitting at a table across from the same girl. We looked at each other for a split second before both looking away. I guess I had a weird look on my face because his friend came up to me (who has a girlfriend, I should note, and I got no vibe of him hitting on me) and offers to buy me a drink, so we head off to the bar.
I don’t see my scorp for another hour, until he’s ready to leave. He walks up to me and gets as physically close as he can, with this dopey, beautiful “I want to kiss you” look on his face. I didn’t back away, but wanted to see what he was doing (yes, I was giving him the same dopey look). He asked me if I was free the next week for the two of us to get together, and I say yes. Right then, a guy who was pushing his wheelchair-bound friend out of the bar ran over the back of my foot. I’m pretty sure I still had remnants of that dopey look as I turned to the guy pushing, smiled, and said “sorry” (don’t ask me why I apologized…). I looked back at my scorp just in time to see the quickest transformation: as he looked at the guy, his smile disappeared and he flashed the fiercest look I’ve seen on a guy outside of a movie. This whole scenario took just seconds. When he looked back to me, I explained that he had run over my foot by accident. We got a little cozy again, to the point of him ignoring his friend (who was behind him and calling his name) to focus on me. Yes, swoon.
I haven’t seen him since then (3 weeks ago). He never called/showed on the day he was supposed to come down; I text him to see if he was still coming (that night), and he said he was working late that night and early the next morning, so no dice. A couple of days later, I text him to ask if he’d like to come down to my place the next week so I could cook for him; I also tell him that I found him attractive and that I wanted to get to know him better. He replied with an enthusiastic “yes!” (exclamation point included), said he wanted us to get to know each other better too, and that he would talk to me so we could figure out a day. 4 days later (and half way through the next week)…still haven’t heard anything, and my friends are asking me to make plans. So I leave him a voicemail…no return call. (and I make plans with my friends)
Get a text from him the night before last saying he was going to a bachelor party on Fri, sorry he’s been out of touch, and that he promises we’ll figure a day out soon to get together. I replied very nicely; remarking on the new puppy he got, said “why don’t you give me a call when you can get together?” and told him to have fun at the bachelor party.
(breathe) So…at this point, I feel like I’ve been getting a lot of talk, promises, and flaking out. I’m very torn between not letting myself be used again (ie, making the decision to walk) and having the patience to stick it out (which, if he’s been as shell-shocked as I have with past relationships… well, it would be amazing to see a guy actually stick around long enough to get through to me.). I’m not naive enough to say this *has* to turn into something. I’m just feeling very “fight or flight” right now, and would like to know if he’s interested or not. Advice would be most welcome…
Joon
I’m a Piseces, and I did everything wrong with my Scorpio. I liked him since last fall, but did not reveal it until early spring. All that time in-between we flirted back and forth. Finally, I got jealous of this girl he was flirting with and let the cat out of the bag. That seemed to do the trick because then he started paying more attention to me and finally asked me out–sort of. We had a good time hanging out and making out. He wanted to have sex with me, but I didn’t want to quite yet. He told me he’s not looking for a relationship. He just wants to have “fun.” I accepted this, sort of, but secretly hoped he would change his mind. Then I slept with him–big mistake–and it wasn’t all that great. For all the talk about their sexual prowess, he didn’t seem to care at all about my needs or desires. He just wanted to get it in and get his. I was nervous, and it hurt so badly, I made him stop. I’m sure that bruised his ego really good since he prides himself on how great he is in bed. Actually, he was so rough with me (in spite of my protestations) I had bleeding and soreness for two to three days. He felt bad because he thought he took advantage of me. Compared himself to the big bad wolf. I emailed him the day after, telling him I didn’t think ill of him and wanted to try to again. Crickets. It’s been a week. I might see him tonight, and I truly don’t know how to act. I don’t know if I should be cold and ignore him or casual and friendly. I really messed up with this guy. I didn’t have much of a chance before, but now my chance is like -20. I’m really down about this and don’t know what to do.
You chose a guy with sex on the mind in the early going. That is a big red-flag warning regardless of his sign or nature.
So with your choices, arrives emotional consequence… of which you’re ‘experiencing’ right now.
I believe, that regardless of a male Scorpio’s charm and/or attractiveness… ALL WOMEN should know precisely WHAT and WHERE exactly, is that particular Scorpio guy coming from.
You see, from reading your comments, I feel that he has deceived you. I believe that you are getting pulled into to his energy field… BUT, you are still not paying attention to your INTUITION. And you can’t see into his deeper true-self.
Hey, he just wanted ‘fun’… so that motivation right there tells me that this guy doesn’t want you on more important, MENAINGFUL levels. He only want’s conquest of your body.
No wonder you feel used. So, it is YOUR emotional responsibility to not get sucked into his empty and egotistical desires any further.
A special, magical time with a woman should be SPECIAL… way beyond the needs of a males impulse and sexual self-gratification.
You’ll be deceiving your own integrity further into a painful hell, IF you keep falling for his ego ideas.
He sounds painfully unevolved.
If you want “more” from the energy and mind and purpose of a man… you will need to reflect on those needs and find what it is EXACTLY THAT YOU WANT from an interaction. ‘Feel’ what is right for you little fish. Feel for a guys intentions and observe his reality. Does he honestly give a lump about you??… These are questions you must continually ask yourself… and pay close attention to his ACTIONS. Words and actions are not the same thing.
If you and millions of other women out there continue trying to ‘please’ the ungrateful and IMMATURE desires of men… you (women in general) you will have only yourselves to blame.
Learn to be courageous IN your choices and IN your expression with a guy who “you think” are going to change, for you.
If he had demonstrated to you, more of a noble intent, more of a mature, funny, considerate, empathic experience with you (while still be a good leader) in your heart… than that is a male you should feel a genuine attraction for.
But it seems he is nothing more than the average Joe, looking for kitten.
If you didn’t want ‘his fun’… than you have the right to deny the guy, over and over. FUN to me… is much more than just “screwing”. And that’s because I’ve grown-up.
Women really need to get over a guy’s looks and/or his money-career. Seriously.
That is an “image” presented by the masses of men… which often lead to shallow, meaningless experiences and those superficial infatuations often do a woman in.
After sex, she is commonly left feeling torn, confused and scarred.
Women need to be awake of their core Truth, and what and WHO their love interest- REALLY IS.
98% of the time, she hooks up with a dim-wit buffoon.
And then bitterness and fear ‘Controls’ the rest of her social-psychological life.
I wish i had come here first, iwould have received so many answers to questions i have been asking myself for the past year or so. I have always considered myself a strong woman, with a very positive outlook on life. I never met a scorpio man before and it seemed like a challenge. The remarkable thing is that they all seem to be the same. When i was reading the comments, i kept thinking…wow she has hooked up with the same guy because the characteristics are all the same. The connection i have to my scorpio is spiritual and maybe this is the lesson i have to learn. However i have to point out a few definable traits. First Control…they want it and if they dont get it then they just wont bother..he is man, you are woman (caveman thing), i agree with the femininity and the eroticism, where they like to push the boundaries of normality in that department (this is all i can dream of and have never experienced) they expect loyalty and trust is the biggest issue (not sure whether the same will be returned i.e lack of contact and when they disappear to their man cave, who knows what they are doing!!
They also look for a woman who is pure, who doesnt give herself too easily otherwise she could go off with others and thats when the jealousy and respect disappears. A scorpio WILL ruin you, they wil give you sleepless nights, they will make you cry like a baby…they will also make you question some of your insecurities. They will never say ‘sorry’ and they will delve into your deepest darkest souls. They have instinctive abilities, so they wont suffer fools gladly. They wont be pushed and they wont be dictated to…they will tell you exactly what they think and they will expect you to be powerful enough to take it. Scorpions in a strange way are trying to be teachers. They bring out the good in you…ways in which you can develop yourself ie to adopt power through weakness and will also try to help you in some way. I have laid my heart on the line…its made me ill, its given me sleepless nights, i have questioned the future, i have cried for help for someone to take away this burdening pain. You see the strange part is trying to live your life through all of it when you are constantly on an emotional rollercoaster. I am learning, trying so desperately to understand the logic. I mean in most circumstances men have different agendas to women, they dont text back or call straight away and women find this rude. I am not making excuses, i am just trying through the help of you all to understand. I know for one it shouldnt hurt like it does but i also know that it is the greatest gift to find your soulmate and learning to deal with all the indiscrepancies in between. so i have a question about the coldness…does it ever ease? do you ever get to a stage where you are confident that you will receive a response after all the effort you have put in and believe me i see a lot of you putting in extreme effort to capture a scorpio. The weird thing is, the games dont work on this guy, the nagging and the bombardment of text messages dont either. So this cold spell i havent bothered either and i am still confident i will hear back…but in the back of my mind there is a little voice that says ‘ what if he doesn’t’ that leaves me confused then? anybody got any answers?
\/ Victoria. \/
Leonine,
None of what you’re feeling is “logical.”
Depth, spoken from the Soul, is far from logical. It is life experience demonstrated in the raw.
Maybe he has an agenda to love you at full force, but over time maybe you haven’t allowed him to be himself?
He may have already known your needs and fears from the start. So the question remains, did YOU express honesty about your needs? Did you make sincere efforts to be alone with him and talk about goals, dreams and directions together… and as independent minds and hearts?
If your bond is meaningful and spiritual, perhaps he can see deep into your worlds, your subconscious attempts to manipulate ‘your intent’ to love him… RATHER than just being open about it and courageous about it.
He may perceive that any false attempts in your BEHAVIOR (Leos nature is infamous for “acting” in front of people they love)… that show off interest, are just that- False realities… and they’re also premeditated manipulations (in subconscious human behavior) that want personal expectations to maintain ‘control’ of the exchange. It’s all extremely subtle. But very powerful.
You should realize that a highly evolved male Scorpio nature is acutely aware of control behavior and all it’s underpinnings and ORIGINS, In terms of- INTENT. He will know if you are doing anything “knowingly” that could be trying to regain control of a situation.
It all depends, if, or how much of himself has he given you? If you both feel a strong connection, then HE MUST BE INITIATING THOSE POWERFUL FEELINGS IN YOU. And he must be teaching you that in order to know true love, we must be willing to get our pride and egos way out of the way. Pride is silly if the forces of love are present.
So, you may not have acknowledged his good intentions until recently.
An evolved male Scorpio, will know if you’re trying to “Con” your way through love. He will just know. And that is why he may be intentionally keeping you at a distance. (or being ‘cold’ as people like to say).
Have you ever told him directly that you love him?
Because telling a hundred friends and relatives about your love is futile and misguided if ‘the Source’ of your love is not getting that transmission.
Learning to ‘Communicate’ with utmost Truth within ourselves- is Freedom. He loves you, however, he won’t feed any of your false agendas if you can’t talk to him from a place of goodness. And do you know how he senses social falseness?
He can see and feel ‘your motivations’ within yourself. It’s spooky… but True. He knows (if evolved) in every moment, if you are defeating yourself through pride games and self-deceit.
Best hopes.
Hi Leonine,
Sit down, relax, breathe in and out. Calm your mind down and then…feel your own energy. In this moment, do not focus on your mind. It gives you no peace. When you think that you have found the answer, you realize that you were wrong. It can be because you did not see the whole picture, only one aspect of it. A viscious cycle can ensue. Instead, focus on how you are right now. You will read this message – and perhaps, for a moment, because you are focused, you will not feel your pain?
When we take one moment, and live it, expand it and focus, the mind calms down and you realize, that it is an illusion.
If you are honest with yourself, you will realize that love can not flow from the viewpoint your state of pain, need, dependency – in any form. Most of us depend on our mental concepts of ourselves – they become our tools to survival. In the presence of true love, this shatters and it serves as a lesson that, as an understatement, “there is something wrong with the world” and there is essentially something wrong with how you function.
When we walk into a relationship – which satisfies our ego, we will not have major problems, if you are ego based. However, when you walk into a relationship that does not respond to your ego, you will collapse. In a strange way, it seems that there is a law – true love is truly the stronger force.
Scorpio also has issues with him or herself, as well as ego, but will refuse to be controlled.
If you think about it, it is not kind to control another human being, as we are all sacred. It is not good to put our fears and weaknessness upon an other – they have their own problems and their own path to walk. It becomes worse, when we don´t realize that how we control others is really our own prison.
If you go down deeper into yourself, you must make the realization that you “want something” and that you are not getting it. Follow the logic of your pain to its source by asking “why?” at least 5 times. Start with the question: Why does it bother me that he is not texting back? Because….
You will see the ego in yourself. Don´t worry about the conclusion that you reach – we all misbehave, have misbehaved, are misbehaving and will misbehave. Just be gentle with yourself as you are doing something that is truly brave.
You are loved and you are certainly not alone. Please do feel that when you start to arrive to your essence.
Thats really funny and thanks so much but its all gone really bad for me, contact wasn’t what i expected and yes i did blow my chance. I am deeply hurt and confused by all of this. For me there was no ego i have just always lived to love with my full self but maybe spiritually this was all it was meant to be and for a short time. I doubt i will hear from this scorpio again, i am unable to go the full depth online but i did screw up and this one changed their mind. Now i dont know what to do, because although the path seemed clear before, it now seems out of reach…or is this a scorpio game for me to respond and apologise?
He doesn’t want any apologies. He wants to know how you’re feeling. He wants mature communication, without the fear of how you will be perceived.
When I had asked you the simple question of ‘did you tell him that you love him?’… I’ll take that as a no.
Gatubela, I like what you have to share. Your thoughts and advice are probably more easy to understand than mine. LoL. I’ve being doing well, and I hope you are too.
Thanks for the kind consideration.
Hi P.Puppy,
I have been gently, wishing you well.
How have I been…? Learning to create.
You have nice thoughts as well.
i told him this all the time but i dont sense that it was reciprocated.
i reacted with jealousy after finding out some stuff and he has replied with coldness and very matter of fact. I am now not sure what to do, although i believe that your calmness and space mentioned by gatubela below (thanks so much for commenting)is the only course of action. Unfortunately i am out of my depth and cant get rid of this really awful feeling of loss although strangely i feel his spiritual connection much stronger than i have for a while. If i get in contact that will just give him the reason to churn me up and spit me out, any suggestions? i really appreciate all this from you guys, its really helping me try and understand things because it seems that the depths of a scorpion as well as his passion to experiment with others is not something i thought was truly the case, I looked for the love and not sure whether it was returned now!!
Hi Leonine,
I believe that one can not presume to form any judgements about him based on what he says or what he does. There is an element of strategy, intensity and consistency. If he is also learning to control his own emotions and perceptions, none of them will be aparent to anybody. Nobody likes the harsh reality that they so accurately and deeply perceive. There is a razor sharpness to their view. What he might have said may not have come close to the intensity of what he truly means. Something terribly important gets lost when it is extracted from the depths and put into “flimsy” words. Sometimes, they have to live their lives feeling so much and showing so little. Sometimes the still deep waters have whirlpools in them that suck them in. This is not a happy scorpio.
Dont try traditional girly girl tactics to get this man to react. They won´t work. You must do the soul work on yourself in order to understand what I am trying to say.
He will stick to what he knows and beleive me, he already knows.
While we can analyze this man all day, I beleive that this is not the issue. You are going to have this problem with any situation that puts you out of your comfort zone into the unknown- scorpio was the wake-up call. It is an indication that you have to grow. Can you function in the unknown or do you need to clearly see your way beforehand? Do you really want this “weakness” for the rest of your life or are you going to try and resolve it and get control over yourself? Please do not fall into ego in order to regain “false” control. You will appear like a parading peacock. As a first step, you must find your solution on a soul level. Be brave – the abyss is an interesting place to be.
Hi Leonine,
I cannot tell you what Scorpio wants, I can only tell you that any answer given would be irreverent as to how you should proceed as it truly does not matter. Please understand however, that what you choose to do will be observed most acutely.
Let us get to the matter of choice and how you should be making them. In your current state, it is highly not recommendable to do anything, as the source of your choice is instability – be it hurt, anger, sadness – you will project this energy into it and most likely, it will not align. Besides, you want release from your suffering, right?
This is a fundamental difference with Scorpio – they may not want release from their personal suffering – not yet. He is not done with it yet. It may have to be expanded; explored, taken apart, tossed around…In other words, they are not afraid to feel to the depths of hell and heaven and then beyond some, if they can. The average human being avoids any “strong” emotion. Let us add the extra baggage of the conclusions that they arrive to and the fact that this physical world probably is not for them…If he was able to mirror this reaction in you, we can only imagine what he is dealing with. 95% of it will be unsaid.
This level of intensity is his daily bread – while for you, it put you into a state of instability and it could be blowing your circuitry. This is the 5% that was shown to you.
Again, you must learn to feel your energy – it is for the reasons above that it is imperative that you do so. You did not respect the energies that were going around – and you must begin to perceive them. NEVER make a decision to act without learning to stabilize yourself first or you will continue to drain yourself. Scorpio will watch, perhaps sadly, but definitely surely. He knows.
Ego, in this case, is the reflection of your selfless love given, complete with your imperfections and strengths. Before you selflessly gave yourself, did you swear to yourself and spiritually commit yourself to purify all negativity? If you did not, you projected good intentions, but now, since you did not clear negativity, Scorpio mirrors it back to you – 10 fold. Give true love, and they will also magnify that back. Perhaps not in a relationship, but they certainly have other abilities. A relationship may not be necessary. Only a Scorpio would understand this last comment.
Learn from this experience as it is strangely, a kind lesson. Do not listen to the noisiness of your mind. During this time of “the unknown and instability” – reach down and concentrate on stilling your mind. You should come close to the feeling of floating on water on your back. That is how relaxed you should be. Master this. Don´t do anything, don’t think anything, don’t react to anything, until you do so.
Hi Leonine,
How are things going?
I hope that you are alright.
I’ve been following up on this and it has been one incredible read.Tempted to comment so here I am.
I’ve known a scorp for almost 9years.Got involved when we were younger and we were both seeing other people as well.childish things.no biggie.
We got in touch once in a while after that.His calls were mainly booty rings.On some nights hes ranting.
We saw different people along the way.There was one time,I got attached to a virgo man and single scorp got pissed because I didnt give him a chance.He never asked me out proper!How was I to think he was REALLY INTO ME.So 8months later,virgo and I stopped dating. And now,scorpy has made me promise to date him.
now the best is yet to come.He rarely texts or IM.he calls but not regular at all and most of the time,it ends off with an”i call you back” and never does.despite the fact that he wants to date me.
we went out on a proper date once.that one was nice,lots of chemistry,stares and intriguing qns.the other “date”,was him and his kooky male friends.bad night enough said.
this saturday,we are going out again.im anxious.at the same time,i just wanna be myself and not worry abt shit.im a pisces.i dont want to fizzle this out.hes an amazing person,and i knw women are falling on his feet.
i really am not his type.he keeps insisting that we have “something.”im an introvert,have a small pool of friends,rarely social and committed to career.hes highly social,lots of friends,women and much more ambitious than i am.i just need to knw that im doin great with life and i wake up a better woman because my job does that for me and not think abt the money im making.hes allllllllllll out for the money.hes out to kill for the money.thats why hes mostly busy with work.hence,little time for hmmm,me!
i dont see the greatness in this.but like i said,he keeps me on my toes.i just dont knw whether this will last.ENLIGHTEN ME.
Hey
Sorry for the late reply in all the comments, they have really helped!! I thought i had the answers and this guy sussed. Unfortunately i know nothing. There has been contact also and said he will get in contact soon. I am not holding my breath as this could be one of his games to make me squirm. I believe that a scorpio drags you to the pits of hell because of their intrigue and then will brush you off and bring you back. I think the key part is here…live your life, try nt to put yourself in their shoes and think about what they are doing (ithink about that all the time)and it drives me mental, i also try and think of ways to figure out and get to the bottom of his behaviour, it doesnt work. I believe there are plenty of oter women all swooning at him, that gives him power. I believe you should just go out and be yourself, the worst for m is over analysing and believe me i have been a tough cookie in the past but this has totally and utterly drained me beyond control. It seems the friendship has already been struck with you and your scorpio, it was the same for me too but a number of issues led m to understand that he has betrayed my trust in him, i am not sure if i am able to put myself through it all again. Its the mystery with them that becomes so intriguing, but somehow you got to learn to draw the line on the way that they behave, so as Gatubela said (i think) maybe silence is the key…maybe i need to gain back some of my leonine strength because believe me there isnt an awful lot left. You can try and escape by trying to find solace in another man, but believe me there is something too strong that i am not sure how to get out of. He is strong, beyond belief, yeah obsession with money, but also women and mystery, they like mysterious women.
If you are an open book then he will learn all about you and you will learn nothing about him, just like i have done, which makes me so sad because i thought we were making some progress. I am not sure what do i do? do i gt back in touch if he makes the effort to contact me or do i just try to leave it all behind and put it down to experience (which is the hardest part)??
And the paradox here is… women appreciate and respect the men who DO have women throwing themselves at us. Why? … well, attraction is not a logical laundry list of “traits.” It’s time to get real. Women feel closer to a guy with personal power, commanding choice, and personal direction.
Does a bland ham dude offer this to women?
No.
Scorpio rules “the intangibles” of connectedness. Forget what is visible. We want the unknown from you. And we will get it. And you will experience our abyss simultaneously.
And that is one huge reason you gals are drawn in. Deeply in. The depth of feeling you experience scares you to death (no pun) so you want more of it. Please forgive, we realize it’s a drug. But it can be a life changing GOOD drug.
Any woman can date a predictable, low vitality ham. And she usually does. Why?… because those ever-ready droolers want to ACCOMMODATE a woman’s every test and whim. Those average hams keep women in their comfort zone. What purpose does that serve in a dynamic relationship??… Squat. That’s what. The unknown juices of life and it’s incredible experiences are NOT PENETRATED by “nice” dudes.
We (classic Scorpio) penetrate you.
If any dude could go deep within you… we would not be having this discussion.
Appreciate the rare. You may never find it again;)
Should we address the concept of “Power” and the comments that scorpios are “all about the money”?
Would you agree P.Puppy, that “power” in the “known ” is different from power in the “unknown”?
Ladies, one fundamental difference is that “power” in the unknown looses its dualistic good / bad connotation. It is only in the “known” that it seems bad. Scorpio´s job is to clear and heal themselves in the “unknown”. Perhaps your scorpios are still in this process. But doing it (good or badly) they must! Dualistically speaking, we form judgements based on the known – ego, without understanding what really lies beneath it – unknown.
I will not say that your scorpios are adept at understanding themselves, but as I said before, don´t judge without going into the “abyss” yourselves. Remember that as you go down, clear negativity, such as your unhappy opinions about your scorpios, otherwise you will feel the rebound energetic response 10 fold. You will truly understand the incredible burden that Scorpios have. Since they are intense, your 10fold negativity for them is magnified perhaps to 100. Ask him about his life experiences – usually, they are more than the average human can withstand. Can you understand why they would have issues on control / power? It is because they must master it themselves in order to be reborn – again and again and again.
Again, until you learn to feel your energy – you will not find the answers that you require. I can say that on a soul level, the answer is there. You have to go down and get to know yourselves – truly, honestly and bravely. There is no right or wrong – only ego and soul.
Hi Everyone,
I agree with you – but Scorpio penetrates for a reason.
Women don´t understand their role and the incredible gift that they have. They are the guardians of the energy – they store it. If she is aware of the energy, she will use mental techniques and spiritual living to increase it more and more and more and not waste it through daily living. an example – she will not release through orgasm. An evolved Scorpio will feel this energy and will understand it as well. A nuclear fusion comes to mind when I think of this energy. She is both life and death – in this case, to a scorpio that has chosen to merge with her. I can not explain to you how vast this energy is. You have to understand what it means to love purely…to love greatly.
Am I making any sense to anyone?
And I had forgot to mention that a large percentage of women choose “Security” over Love. So that’s another reason why women choose average subservient men. If he’s financially do well, she’ll dismiss love for the safety of survival and the illusion she projects upon the relationship that she “loves” him.
That’s a plain fact. Just look closely in your social environments.
Gatubela, Power resides in both. But “Real Power” exists in the social phenomena known as INFLUENCE.
This influence is the ability to ‘choose’ for a mans-higher-self, his woman, his kids and the betterment of the world around him each given thought, act and breath.
A ‘super-consciousness’ in a guys life is what a woman really yearns for… and she is also deathly afraid of. For a woman’s wisdom understands that her Love energy will be met by the Underworld.
So her navigating her own fears, is the death touch to most relationships.
I believe the emphasis and responsibility should be sustained through the mind and heart and soul of the guy.
Women, are the Love energy. Period.
So I believe that men need to man-up, and BE men in matters of the heart for his woman, through the guidance of his own volition.
It’s all extremely subtle and unseen.
Therefore these are powerful energies that masses of men are UNAWARE of.
And that is why the male Scorpio seeks his own “buried treasure.”
P. Puppy,
I think that we are on the same wavelength – but I just want to add some thoughts.
A woman´s “contribution” to a relationship, energetically must be aligned with the man´s. In this sense, she becomes more than just love energy. Through her, the male “executes”.
The exchange of energy requires continuous “grounding” from both sides as the merging process begins. She is one with him and he is one with her. Any disalignment and “kaboom!!” The energies are intense and perceived as painful. It is because both the male and female loose their individual “essences” and form a third, combined one.
This a continuous dance and exchange of love between the male and female parts as they both strive to raise their energies the highest and purest form possible, (zero ego) and try to accomodate their own 2 individual desires into 1 unified desire, yet they must be strong enough to maintain their own vibrant personalities.
I see that you beleive that we must focus on the male aspect, but I believe that both must be focussed on. Any disequality, and one will not be able to sustain the other.
Are you saying that because men, through resonating and expressing their masculine energetic “Yang” have the ability to bring out the expression of the feminine energetic “Yin” in a woman, understanding that the quality of this expression on both sides will depend on the evolved, individual balance that each person has attained?
If you mean this, then I beleive that a “man-upped” man will have to seek his energetic equal.
With regards to your comment on Influence, where do you focus your influence on? Is the illusionay known a reflection / projection of the unknown?
Gatubela,
Influence, both good and evil, in the Behavior of men, their thoughts and actions, their attitudes in every MOMENT- is no secret for women. Women have the innate capacity to Feel or Sense if a man has a greater “Center” than that of the stream of males who do nothing significant in a moment beyond the scope of the drudgery they’re slaves to in their own daily routines.
A man being organically “grounded” is an essential foundation for his SOUL. Yet an expressive ego sans a soul, is a blind fool. Because a man who can EMPATHIZE with multiple different people, varies egos in others, diverse conflicts anywhere-anytime, blatant attitudes and motivations REGARDLESS of their values, beliefs or ideologies… can soulfully IDENTIFY with the world at large. Meaning, he is capable of TRANSFORMATION of not only himself, but the energy of any given moment with a person, or hoards of persons. He has a SPINE together with his consciousness, but does not abuse this “knowing” That is Love.
The ‘unknown’ are things, People, circumstances and revelations which people are afraid (UNCONSCIOUSLY AFRAID) to understand.
The ego veils deeper Truths. People live their lives in an unconscious sleep.
So my point is this.
Any person who “thinks” that they understand everything in THEMSELVES- AND THEIR PARTNER (the Unknown)- Is A Fool.
If human beings are so foolish enough to believe that they’re involvement is an immortal relationship without room for pain, deceit and ignorance… than their ignorance is Total Bliss.
Growth for human beings go infinitely past a rational (albeit stagnant) reaction to life’s twists and turns.
I suggest you don’t over-complicate the raw energy of personal power little Leo.
Personal power is not an over-compensation in action or thought in speech. Personal Power does not waste Energy.
Women know what it is. When a woman who stands before a man with CALM INTENSITY, all she has to do is FEEL it. A woman feels what exactly? She feels his astounding INNER PEACE. The Social-Self-Knowledge DEMONSTRATED through his intricate BEHAVIOR. She knows, just “knows” when a man has HIGH PRINCIPLES, righteous ethics, sound morals, goodness of heart and soul… ESPECIALLY during ADVERSE ENERGY among her… and among people.
I will not further explain this.
Energy is all. What does a man DO with that energy to CATALYZE the Love energy in a woman and the love energy in the world of people around him?
Does he impregnate the world of people with Love and Spine?
He knows you better than you know yourself.
And You already know that;)
Hey all
thanks again for helping me get through this, it is so nice to know that i can get other opinions apart from battling this in my own mind and heart. The stage at present revolves around keeping in contact or walking away. My mind is playing tricks on the sincerity of this scorpio and i am not sure what to believe anymore. I agree that i love him pure and true, who knows if it is one sided, but what i do know is that i may have to set him free to find his way in life and get himself together for the sake of love. I thought he was the evolved soul and i was learning from him, but i am pretty sure i am the established one and he has mny lessons to learn in this lifetime. I wonder if i could get your opinions on soulmates? What happens if you know this person is your soulmate but you question whether he was genuine with his feelings. I am all over the place and what i thought was so securely mapped out seems to have disappeared and possibly scorpion is moving on elsewhere
thanks
Leonine
If he was your ‘soulmate’ there wouldn’t be the need for so many unknowns….you would have many of the answers and it wouldn’t be so difficult. That’s my opinion anyways. I’ve found a soulmate in my Scorpio and I know this because neither one of us is running. I have no more questions…all I have is answers – without even having to ask any questions. And I can tell you it didn’t take astrology to get me to that point…it took trust in myself, trust in the relationship and letting go of what does not matter.
FF
Blindness is a person who doesn’t Seek.
These persons “think” that their relationships do not need questions. For they already have the all the answers.
I pity such foolish weakness.
How’s your love life PP?
Oh that’s right – you don’t have one.
Oh such a wise man who speaks of things he himself does not understand.
Don’t bother replying – I won’t be reading it. I skip over your posts.
Leonine,
It is nice to see that you are stronger.
Let us focus on you – and then work backwards towards your relationship.
As one starts to feel themselves, you start to see what love is NOT. And at a more profound level, you start to feel what you ARE. Please understand that you are using the subject pronoun “I”. You are defining yourself – I want to assure you that you are not defining your relationship with this man. This is the effect of your instability. Your relationship with this man should be defined using the words “my relationship…”.
It is interesting that we define our relationships as to their effect upon ourselves, without realizing that it is the effect of ourselves upon the relationship that we are really talking about. This is the ego.
While you start to clear yourself, continue further in your analysis – The comments that you have just given is a start, but you must go on in order to understand scorpio a bit better.
hello.
this is interesting . it is so good to read the level of honesty. pluto puppy and gatubela- thankyou.when i looked up from reading this everything looked different.something has shifted in my reality.i am understanding what you are both talking about. i know i struggle with feelings of attachment.and fear of opening up and baring my soul fully. but i want to so much!i get stuck in these strange pre perceived mental states as i completely shut down my heart and the flow of the moment.fear of death of grief of memories of loss. fear of procreation.crazy huh? gatubela do you ever experience orgasm?or have you chosen to divert the energy to other areas?
Hi Umm,
What a loaded question – well, here goes…!
It had been hard for me to find a sexual partner that I felt I could open up to. My issue is that I see people for who they really are, and not what they have projected. This is compassionately and almost lovingly done. My Scorpio was the only one who saw me for what I really was and not what I projected. He says the same thing about me. It was like coming home. All of this happened without one word being spoken.
So, at the moment, I am in the process of raising my energies – once I achieve the state I want, I will release and channel, through him.
I would agree with you Femme to a certain degree. However it is possible to have many forms of soulmates and many karmic lessons to learn also. I don’t have the physical association with my soulmate and i also believe that although i am highly evolved in the spiritual sense, my soulmate is not. I also agree with you that there shouldnt be such difficulty but its a sense to follow your heart and your gut instinct that has made me believe this so strongly. The important part about loving someone is the will to let them go at a time when it is not beneficial for both to be together. I am sure if i had my soulmate physically without complications then it would work, unfortunately i am not in the position to experience that at this stage, although i am extremely glad that you managed to find peace with yours Femme.
i need some advice here..im a scorpio male..as some of you might know.ive fallen for an aries female..we spent a week talking,and then we dated..we kissed very passionately..i wanted to see her again a couple of days later,and then i told her how i felt.i spilt my emotions to her,and after that she said she just wanted to be friends..i dont understand how someone can just throw away that much passion.any advice on what might have happened here??
Well brother, “a kiss” to a woman doesn’t mean much, especially a bouncy independent Aries girl. I’ve had my own involvements with these women. It’s important to realize that they are “babies” with their emotions. Very petulant and snappy. I enjoy their independence. They don’t want to be tied down with heavy burdens of emotion, which is actually very healthy in a mature relationship. So if were to suggest anything, it would be to ‘not make her your primary interest.’
Women catch on very quickly, if you make them top priority. They deeply want the guy to LEAD the direction of EVERYTHING, while still being compassionate to her needs. Your whole life view, the projects you handle, the people you respect or hang-out with are all things women notice about you.
Women have a sixth sense about “what is most important” in your life. And if they feel pursued without YOU wanting to UNDERSTAND THEIR NEEDS AND VALUES, than sharing your emotions, your real-self will be a waste of time for both you and her.
The key is to look deeply into what and WHO she really is. She will not be offended. She will be flattered that you really want to find out what makes her happy. By showing genuine interest in her needs, you’ll also find out what turns YOU away from her emotionally and practically. So by showing genuine interest in her, while ALWAYS maintaining your own visions and goals (your own life) a male Scorpio can “know” if a woman really “Wants” him.
I personally never give away my time and energy to a woman who I instinctively “know” that doesn’t want me in return.
She’s gotta “want” you brother. And the only way to penetrate her reality of you, is to be a man with your Purpose… With or Without Her.
She’s gotta know that you are ready and willing to drop her attention, because you have greater things going in your life BEYOND the need to “please” her.
Best regards.
Ok man, here’s something you can use and say minus the need to find out what she’s about.
Say:
YOU
“Hey (her name) you know what sounds like a lot of fun?”
HER
What?
YOU
Get your ammo ready, I’m taking you to shoot some paintball!
HER
(If she doesn’t like that idea, tell her you want her to join you for…
ANYTHING that is FUN
* She loves fun activities more than any other gal.
After a month or two of consistent fun and freedom, (always detach your deepest emotions) she will be IN LOVE with you, and following you around like a lovable puppy dog.
God, I’m bad.
But there is NO other way to an Aries heart.
She wants self-discovery and pleasure in her hobbies and activities.
Give her those freedoms, and she will scurry to you at will.
Um, don’t say I didn’t warn you about babysitting her constant needs for change;)
Emotionally… she will ‘Never’ understand your depth.
That’s the sad reality brother.
hey pluto,i really appreciate your advice man.this girl really put her hooks into me.it came to a point though where she even refused to answer my calls anymore,but..BUT i made her chuckle at the end of our last conversation..and i could tell there was a potential warmth in her laughter.so thats what kept me going.i stopped calling or texting for 6 days,and i sent her a lyric of a song i wrote for her.today i called..still no response.but something tells me if i show her im there for her,shell turn around.as dumb as that sounds.your right though about having other interests.my music is going good,and my plans are coming to fruition more and more.i really appreciate your advice,thanks alot.
on our first date..i took her to eat at sizzler,we joked and laughed..i have a sagitarius rising and so does she,so that was good..anyways on the way out the restaraunt,i was a polite gentle man and i patted her on the back until i got the courage to embrace her all the way to my car..then we got to the movies and i did the same..then we got in to the actual theathre and went all the way to the back seats..and thats where the magic happened..i emraced her,cuddled her and kissed her,and she stroked my hair..i wasnt even paying attention to the movie..time went by too fast..
You’re welcome Harmonica.
Both of you have Gemini on the Descendant, so that axis tells me that you both like off-the-wall fun and humor, and the absurdities in life. That’s great, keeping things ‘light and adventurous’ in everything you say and do will spark more magic and chemistry besides the cuddling.
Also, because you’re both Sag Risings, she has a ton of “Fire” in her nature, so she’s probably quite the little pistol around people. You may find that she may get ‘easily bored’ over trifling or trivial circumstances, so you’ll need plenty of patience, keep your core center and flow with it. Honesty is another thing she will appreciate, and I know you do too. Relate with her about things directly, without any varnish. Integrity and play is a large part of your and her relating ideals.
Finally, if you really wanna know what her life ‘Path’ is… find out her North Node Sign and House. Also, you can gain much ‘higher’ insight about your spiritual path by reading into your N. Node too.
P.Puppy,
“Little Leo” – that is what you have called me. If you only knew. Transformation is Death. Really.
I dared P.Puppy, to… go… beyond…it…all…
And I still have so much to learn.
Being a Aries…I know that I like the chase. Don’t make yourself so readily available, that gets boring and well is just not that exciting. We like to have fun, loads of it, so like Pluto said suggest something fun and exciting to do. Don’t be too clingy, but at the same time don’t abandon her either. Text her let it be for a while. When she thinks your not interested anymore she will call. We don’t like to feel unwanted. Horrible I know! She’ll come around just don’t be a easy conquest… 😉 I know I say conquest but that’s how we or I tend to look at it from that angle.
Gat, thanks.
We all have that ‘playful inner-child’ to share with the world.
Ten years ago, I did not know the pure joy of self-love and deep affection towards humanity.
My darkest days are behind me at 35.
Change, intense change, forming through my sexual relationships, personal relationships, professional relationships, casual acquaintances… ALL human beings (Pluto in the 7th House) have showed me, taught me, so much about the exhilaration of life which can be found inside me… I have much gratitude and levity to give back.
Along with the life-long pursuit of “Higher Meaning”… it is the true blessing of the divine-woman, her wondrous energy, which always inspires me to become great, and greater.
And I will;
…and so you will. Don´t forget to come up for some celestial air.
Your energy…can be felt … continents away. I just thought you should know.
The Presence of God is IN every single one of you.
The religions, cults and sects of the world, will ramble that God is a Noun. That your “faith” in a force “outside” of your-self, your molecular being, will set you free… psychologically, emotionally mentally… free.
The only heaven and the only hell visible by man– originates between HIS EARS and in his heart. (or black heart)
I have realized through my experiences that…
God is not a Noun.
He is a Verb.
frustrated aries,can i send you that lyric i wrote for my girl??i want to know what a female thinks..and pluto if your curious about it,you can see it too.my email is pinkfloyd5321@sbcglobal.net
i agree with what pluto says about God,i learned about those ways through meditation.we people think we can intellectualize everthing.but you cant know god..you have to be GOD.and you can do that through meditation..god is infinite,and when you are in tune to the infinite,you become infinite,the witness to your emotions and thoughts,instead of beings those emotions and thoughts.
Yes harmonica, we certainly can become God through quiet, private meditation.
But I would like to take that Truth to another level.
It is possible, to be that “Awake” with the Source… during every minute of our waking lives. Yep.
That state of Consciousness can become WHO WE ARE, not just during a 2 hour meditation session… but during the chaos, during the stress, the daily pressure and grind, the delusions and distractions of the outside world.
We can be in this reality of ‘total peace’ while forging and governing the hustle and bustle of earthly activity around us doing what it does.
Now harmonica, the lyrics you wrote may well be amazing… but ask yourself this question brother… Do you feel the importance of your creativity, at this stage of knowing her, is as equally important ‘to her’… in her reality?
Your intentions are gallant. I just don’t want to see her shutting you down because you thought that writing her a song would bring you closer to her heart.
Remember, the Ram-bunctious Aries lamb might want to wrestle around with you in rain pools of mud instead… and then she might wanna go out for waffles.
Surprises tickle the hearts of these women;
I hope she loves it.
thanks for that gatubela.i like how you said its like coming home. its a wonderful thing huh. i think i am a bit the same when it comes to seeing who people are other than what they project. hmm. how long have you been with this scorpio and what sign are you?
i reckon love is a verb too. same thing tho huh.
That is a loaded question for me. However, I can tell you that the sign (s) that I was born under is irrelevant. To lightly follow the idea that P.Puppy gave about the Source – I hope that you can understand why this is so.
How long have I been with my scorpio? Time is such an illusion. It does not matter.
On the deepest and highest levels of human existence… our Deeds… we are All of the signs in divine unison.
That is where the expression “Oneness” and “Wholeness” derives.
But in order to be Whole, life has many harsh and painful lessons for us to understand.
Finding Truth- is being in Communion with God.
Love is indeed a Verb. The Feminine energy innately knows this.
I believe it is the Masculine energy that needs to understand what Love truly Means. In the deepest sense of relating, I believe it is a mans destiny to Free a Woman’s Soul… to unlock the repeating troubles of her heart.
Because women want Love more than anything.
The problem though, is that a woman’s ideas of love, her experiences of it through crushing memories by a man, make her become distrustful of Love over time.
So a man’s Deeds… from the most tiny levels… have meaning to women, those deeds mean ‘everything’ to a woman.
Unfortunately… almost every man in existence is Not Conscious of his deeds.
And women pay the heavy price for them;)
gatubela. i didnt intend for you to feel loaded or fear. it was just a question.yeh at the end of the day its true none of it really matters. nothing in fact matters.thats why we are here on a scorpio site. cup of tea and a muffin? oops that may seem loaded.
Umm,
Fear has not been an acceptable state of being for me since I was a little girl. Have I misused the word “loaded”? Please accept my apologies.
It was your fear that I was worried about had I answered your question honestly. I interpretted your question “What sign are you?” as being related to the time I was born…
In order to answer your question under your “vocabulary”, please give me some information. How do you define “born”?
I don´t beleive that “nothing” matters. It “ALL” matters. In relation to my relationship,time is not a way to describe it. Time is a limitting illusion. I will answer your question in another way.
I have known him “ALWAYS”.
plutopuppy,
yes one could say the same about women.. and men pay the heavy price for them too.
Umm,
That maybe so. But, in my world… a Quality, Unique Male… is not created by the Source to cushion a woman’s confusion, to counter a woman’s anger or to relieve a woman’s frustration… when in love.
His damn responsibility is to inject NEW MEANING and vitality into the relationship.
In my belief, the True role of a Real male, is to offer the woman his seed.
Yes… I said, his seed. Don’t laugh, I’m serious. His duty as a man is impregnate new life into her FEELINGS for him.
The Feminine, YOU… are the “receptor” of a mans ideas, his clarity of choice, his direction for both of you, and his determined higher purpose in every given moment of your relating.
So the onus of “the spark” and “the magic” and “the chemistry” ORIGINATES, IN, the Masculine.
To me, a guy who “allows” women to ‘impregnate him’ with that spark, that chemistry… and that love feeling… is a spineless wimp.
Tell me… does that lack of bravery prove he has VITALITY?… does his passivity prove a KILLER SEXINESS?… does his behavior exemplify that guy is on A MISSION?
No mam.
Usually it takes a woman Years to figure that basic Truth out.
You can mail me a thank you card. LoL
Agriculturally speaking…A “masculine” man, who has vitality – and a mission…would require a female has the capacity to “cultivate”. The man “impregnates” into what? If the soil is barren, the seed wont grow. The seed requires “energy”.
Yes Gat. Spot on.
If a woman can cultivate a man’s seed to be greater than what he feels he is or could be… then they are-> One.
The problem though, as Leonine mentioned… couples live blindly because the first step of kinetic energy-> the male injection of his seed into his woman… is Ignored or Unknown… through the inner emotional processes of His Fears and inadequacies.
So the basic rule of thumb is this:
If HIS energy is fearful, ignorant and inadequate… then HER inner experiences of his fear and emptiness are TRANSMUTED through her… and back to him.
This exchange of emptiness and fear is running rampant among couples around the world.
I don’t care how “materially secure” people think they are.
Their money only blankets their dysfunction.
yeh, you know i hear you. receive you ( your ideas seed) ( and no i wasnt laughing, i feel the same way.) i was in my garden before with my hands in the earth and all that feeling just came to me. that feminine energy feeling.at that point i felt ready to receive the seed ( now its your turn not to laugh).but the seed was not there. just a magpie. well it was a friendly and beautiful magpie.
have you fulfilled your role pluto puppy?
also want to say that i get really bothered by what is happening in the world these days.. between men and women generally speaking too. i had a thought it was fear based but anyway whatever it was that the media is getting so distorted from the truth and creating these cultures whereby we are getting more and more removed from nature from love from trust and wholeness. and here i am on a computer.. hypocrite. sigh. wonder whether humans will stop talking altogether. girls dont seem to want love anymore just money and fame. i know i am generalising. where has the real beautiful love values gone in this world? i .. blah blah. sorry that was just some muck. gone now.
i do thankyou by the way.
umm,
My role as it goes, extends beyond the reach of one woman being the center of my universe.
If you can begin to imagine, what my honesty and idealism is worth to women out here in Los Angeles… you’ll begin to understand that many women just don’t get me.
There is another ‘label’ given to a classic male Scorpio in cookbook astrology.
And that label is:- the Stranger.
My ex girlfriends, women friends… STILL have no clue who I really Am, and some of them have known me for years.
I am very sociable and likable.
But the loner in me is forever.
so what does it mean for you to be a loner?
It means that women are not a spiritual path of self-development and self-evolution with me.
You said it before.
“Money and Fame.”
A woman has immense insecurities. She is fearful of the unknown truths in her life. Her image owns her. Her needs for survival own her core being. Her personality is as fragile as an egg. Her emotions… even more tender.
They relate with me superficially. They know nothing else.
They do not know themselves.
Therefore… on a spiritual level… they keep a deep separation from what is beyond them.
Within an hour of conversing with a woman, I can make her feel completely naked.
I don’t want to. I actually want her to appreciate the shock in herself. But she doesn’t. She blushes and changes the subject to something that appeals to her.
So I am left with no choice but to relate with her like I would a bratty little sister.
I either end up ravishing her in bed… or our dating stops and I never hear from her again.
So you tell me what’s the deal with this lifelong pattern?
The deal is, my life, who I am becoming… is something better deep inside my Underworld.
While on the surface of earthly romance… I foresee the same damsel ready to be ravished.
This cycle does not fulfill me like I once thought it did.
An altruistic bond is what I want. But it does not exist.
That is a very true concept Pluto. It seems the scorpio in question in my case does not have the capacity to love with oneness and prefers to boost his ego through representing himself to different people. Unfortunately i have got extremely hurt throughout this and not being able to recover, which i have been able to easily in past situations. I feel the deceit and dishonesty is something that i doubt i will get over and still not sure as to the extent of the feelings this scorpio had, leving me totally lost and empty. I must add in my own defence that i am willing to break the boundaries of love and am not afraid to give my heart but anyone suggest what i can do because my ethics wont let me forgive this but my heart and gut are still drawing to him, although trust has completely gone.
it does not exist yet. but it will i believe if you want it enough.not all women are the same just as men are not all the same. what the deal is is that i think you are recognising a pattern that has been your past, but it isnt your future, hence it isn’t lifelong. and dont go thinking that your past is lifelong either!
If your trust has completely gone, then you will have eat your own poison, darling.
Always remember that you have the power of Choice. To leave on your own accord at any time of redundant despair and deceit.
If you have strong dependency issues to him, e.g financially or sensually or privately… I suggest you start looking deep into your own needs with utmost truth.
I wish you a better future.
pluto puppy,
think i just kind of repeated myself. oh well. there are lots of things to ravish apart from women. like yummy food hehe! and the other things that you like to do.and there does not need to be any guilt in saying no either if you understand what i mean.
Leonine,
I will try to look at your situation from another angle.
Why is it so difficult that he has decieved you? The level of deception can be measured in terms of the expectations that you felt you had with him and the end result, or the low “return on investment”. You ventured, the risks were high, and it did not turn out as it should have. I can understand the lack of trust, but realistically speaking, trust is something to be earned, not given. Even in situtations dealing with the heart. Good faith perhaps can be given, but trust – takes time.
Once someone trusts, they relax their outer “shells”.
Due to the energetic squeeze that you have had, you are desperately trying to fill it up – thus indicating that you normally do things impulsively. So the first thing I do suggest, is not to be so impulsive. Work on that.
Another thing that could be happening is that you do not know how to filter? There maybe residue, but you are not psychically filtering out the “vibes” – for lack of a better word. Close your eyes and start to explore your emptiness – it probably is full of pain. (i hope you had good cry). Don´t fill it up with him – that is an energetic crime. You must learn to channel your energies into something – perhaps helping people. I am sure that there is something that you love to do other than being with him. Do that.
A third thing is …wake up beautiful lion! You are a special person. You were before him, and have the potential to be more, after him. You must continue and be strong – but never for him. Always for yourself. Your future lies ahead – and it is a wonderful one. Shake yourself, lick your paws, and land squarely on them. Breathe in…breathe out…can you feel it? It is all an illusion – the answer has always been in you.
hmm i meant to say future isnt lifelong.when it comes down to ideas in the mind.mind plays tricks.i really like the honesty. its full moon. possibly getting eclipsed tonight.i like it when all the ducks and geese are out at night under the full moon .
Umm,
It has been a long time since I have heard someone talk about ducks and geese and a full moon. The last time I heard / read the word “magpie” was 15 years ago. They are the black birds right?
I am in Latin America right now, but I am orignally from Canada. I used to listen to the loons, singing their mournful song at twilight with the mist dancing on the lake. What lovely solitude!
If my intuition serves me correctly… the “magpie” Umm is referring to… is swooshing from the eucalyptus trees down under around the suburbs of Australia.
As mentioned a while ago, I was born in Sydney, lived there 24 years before arriving in the States.
I vividly remember as a teenager getting “swooped” by a magpie matriarch who was protecting her babies.
Gat… magpies in Australia are black and white, slightly smaller than a big black crow.
LoL… the irony is, I now do the “swooping” in the presence of helpless women.
Are you an Aussie, Umm?
gatubela- i like that name by the way. where is it from. like got u bella! yes it is an australian bird, black and white, has a very distinct call- kind of all over the shop. and they do swoop to protect their young. i like magpies. they come and hang out with me in my garden and we look for worms together. theyre funky and overlooked.
i also love ducks . geese sound good but i was chased by one as a kid. yes the sound is yum. ravishing (hehe). could you describe a loon? is that where loonie tunes comes from? did anyone see the eclipse this morning? i was awake at 4 30 but then fell asleep.
plutopuppy,
yes i am an aussie. yes i have been swooped too.. by a magpie. also willywagtails, they can be very cheeky.but they do their job and they do it well.plutopuppy are you a magpie? i didnt know they could type! have you heard of artist called paula rego originally from portugal now in london she did alot of paintings around animals and women and men. one of a pelican and a woman. very prolific artist.have a look if you get time.
In the end, we only deceive ourselves.
The answers like Gatubela said, are always IN you. To believe the in consequences outside of you… is to live in denial.
You can free yourself Leonine. First you must turn your sunny Leo nature INWARD and reflect long and deep on where your unconscious choices have taken you.
We all have the ability to change our lives. Constantly. Stagnation kills. Breaking past illusory fears, identifying what is intrinsically ‘false’ in our lives… is the first step toward self-truth and freedom.
Identifying what is false…exactly.
It indicates that you are also denying what is “true” as p.puppy said. Thus you empower the “bad”. You dedicate your resources to this state and as you do this, it feeds on you and you feed on it. It is growing quite nicely.
As a minimum, how can we makes steps toward healing when we do not know what is “good”. (again, for lack of a better word) You can not heal yourself until you decide what is first good. The truth follows as you continue your search for “goodness”.
If you had a child, and the child continuously put his finger in an electric socket, what would the mother do? A reprimand would be forthcoming.
In a strange way, you are misbehaving. Continously making wrong choices and putting your hands into this “scorpio socket” is “naughty”. Life sometimes does not give gentle reprimands – as you can see. Your pain is indication of that. But a reprimand is forthcoming.
A child would listen and learn. You are much more than that.
P.Puppy,
“Making a woman feel naked”…
That is working because the woman feels the “scorpio super – combo x-ray – PET/CT zinger scan” Did I forget the thingy with the black hole energy compression unit?
Those eyes finally meet yours – and then … Wow!!!
Well, in the case of my scorpio, the balloon went “pop!” I had nothing to hide. …As I was not hiding anything, I am able to perceive even grain sized dishonesties. Don´t get me wrong, I still blushed, but my eyes met his square on and of course, so did my soul. Submission is not a weakness. Most men don´t get that. Most women don´t either.
As the “masculine” is the universal “penetrator”, the feminine can be the universal “receptor”. However, this means that she can lovingly “receive” information on various levels known and unknown. She also lovingly “knows” and sees quite clearly what is going on. But she stands on her own principles and chooses. As you have certain abilities, so does she.
Scorpionic energy is truly fascinating. Never doubt your wonderful abilities. There is so much more that I could share with you, but it may be a bit heavy for this forum. I do wish that you find what you are looking for.
That’s cute. I love your energy and outlook on life.
i get it gatubela.
and now the darkness descends.pluto square whatever conjuncivits not. and eclipsed. and yeh the loner feeling creeps in.
conjunctivitis.conjunct. too much the same.
Am I a magpie?
Umm… no pun.
No.
Suffice it to say, I am an…
Eagle-Phoenix-Eagle-Phoenix.
A magpie really belongs in the nutty farm of all bird species.
I feel them to be misfits and as you described perfectly… “Loony.”
I am happy in my “alone-ness”
Because in Truth, I don’t feel alone.
Darkness and I have become close friends.
The light and the dark are as natural in us as the air we breathe, the water we drink.
Life-Death-Re-birth… and over again.
Nothing could be more fulfilling… to me.
plutopuppy,
the loony i was referring to was questioning gatubelas mention of a bird she knows. but yeh i agree with you maggies are a bit loony i guess.misfits….who knows. maybe. as long as there is free expression things are ok. yes life death rebirth. seems neverending. i wonder what will come first when we finally stop breathing altogether? maybe its nothing.nothing.ness. i can befriend darkness sometimes but its usually after the fact. i cant stand phonys though. had a cufuffle hmm not sure of spelling. with my sister yesterday. things are always intense for me around full moon. she couldnt handle my energy and what i was talking about her walls were going up by the second and she just just down.but thats the thing she wasnt where i was at. thats ok.well it was painful. but she just doesnt let herself go to any extreme depths.avoids the darkness as much as she can.alot of people are like that.
so eagle pheonix – thats two. isnt there 3 in that cycle you mentioned? what stage do you feel you are in now?
i am not sure what animal i am. hmm..
sorry mispelling i meant to write “shut down”.
maybe im a bear. probably just a human
“What will come first when we finally stop breathing altogether?”
Umm,
Are you an earth sign, or earth rising sign? Because what happens after our physical death can’t be felt or understood through earthly rationale.
The eagle is a symbol. A symbol of vast and deep consciousness. The all seeing eyes of the Eagle who views mother earth by gliding above earthly indulgent sensual pleasures and non-fluid emotional and psychological ruts. Stagnation. In it’s most mundane form.
A loon may be blissfully free. But True freedom has PERSPECTIVES from self-knowledge to collective universal knowledge. Meaning… those perspectives are One and the same.
So now that you see, that the Eagle or any other SYMBOL is reflective of our mundane or mystical realities.
My realty, as a result of inner Scorpionic Deaths and Re-Births (the Phoenix rising out of the ashes of self-delusion and meaningless personal personality dysfunction )… is by VIRTUE of a Spiritual State of Consciousness.
My states of consciousness goes beyond what I need to do to make a living, to pay the bills, to whom I am devoted and loyal to, to what I want to eat for dinner, to how much money will make feel safe, to why I think my boss is an asshole, to why I things and circumstances agitate me, to why the dog ate my shoes… Get the Picture??
MY LIFE is Beyond that garbage now.
Why.
Because I have a Deep appreciation for Death and fluid change as a man.
I fear nothing anymore.
The above paranoia’s I had mentioned… happen because those manifestations of being are Ego-Limited.
The Ego-Self which believes that there is no Universal Source in Control… Is the True Loon.
pluto puppy. do you think im a loon. or you are a loon?how did loon become so loonie? hehe. no seriously i am hearing you. actually like you said-what happens after our physical death cant be described through earthly rationale. i think you are right. even rationale. yes i am an earth sun and rising with a water moon. do you really fear nothing? do you have children? i really understand that fluidity you are talking about. that is the releasing of fear and attachment to wordly desire.yes to ego. when i look at the stars at night the earth is small.it all seems silly and strange and all these people floundering around making mess and things and being busy eating sleeping excreting driving cars and planes and fighting and loving and building and destroying and creating and dying. we are all going to die. the planet will die. the people we love will die.every day a billion ants get squashed by the tyres of a car. yes i get sad. i feel sad now. i feel afraid. i really dont like what humans do to animals. how humans think they are so superior. ah the whole thing is garbage. so where are you at now? right now.
So you are- double earth + moon in water. Two out of two for me… plus the Aussie investigation. LoL
Darling, fears are IMAGINED.
Unless you’re facing a desperate tiger who is famished and ready to rip you to shreds.
99% of our fears stem from simple neurosis.
Unconscious of deep personal attachments.
They are earthly attachments to circumstances which are Not In Our Control- Like a million ants getting squashed every day, or the excretion and animal behavior of dimly evolved, as you put it… messy, busy androids stuck in their desires to make a name for themselves at any cost.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m quietly ambitious too. I want to work very hard and earn all the goodies and creature comforts of this earth. Sow and Reap. Sow and Reap. After all, I am in a human body.
But through a strong sense of spiritual-self… I no longer ALLOW the seduction of money and material success TO BE MY GOD.
Truth, has become my God.
People, the masses, are slaves to their debts and career and social position. Why? They HUNGER for power… and that is because??… They are STARVED of such power.
I have learned what real power is. And I have a deep responsibility with every breath of it.
I have no children. I’m an only child. I’m left handed with a B- blood type.
The world pf people as turns out… have become my family.
I don’t attach myself to anyone. Because ‘anyone’ is usually not fulfilling, to me.
I learn much through humanity and what it truthfully means to be human.
Including all the nasty, cruel, intolerance and injustices of this human existence.
I’m very aware of those who suffer. The millions. Because I have suffered in kind.
As a result I am becoming a human being who wants to heal where I can. Selectively and with discernment. A life full of meaning, is bliss.
pluto puppy,
what are pf people?
i think i tend to take on others responsibilities as a form of self control and outer control and its a way for me to disassociate from the truth. like what i said earlier about preconceived thoughts in my head. yes it is a neurosis. i hate it! you have great courage.
i know my deep fears are not all about the animals and what is happening in the world.it is a cover i use to hide my other fears. fear hiding fear! cripeys. i want to learn how to love. i want to learn to recieve love. and be woman. not animal. woman. and what it means to be in union with man. complete union. with no fears. and know my place on this earth. and accept his.
i think you are a healer
i also want to help others if i can. and learn some mastery over my emotions. through getting to the truth. at every moment. i think i just get confused and afraid when i dont understand what i am feeling and where it was born and where i should be directing it.. that i can suffocate through physical. meaning try to control others physically without meaning to. it is almost like a way of protecting what i keep close to my heart that i need to keep sacred. my sister was saying to me repeatedly yesterday ” i am not you. i will never be you so i cannot really understand” i wasnt wanting her to fix me or treat me as a victim.
it is through connectedness whether silent or not that we can understand ourselves.
the power thing you are talking about, i am glad you understand it and can see through the rubbish. i cannot relate to most of the people around me and the choices they make. ludicrous. and the bogans!!! i have two of them next door screaming at their kids who scream back and mother must be 18 but sounds like a monster and teaching her kid to sing “aussie aussie aussie oi oi oi” unbelievable. the epitomy of bogan.
obviously i have alot to learn.
i noticed i just got caught up again in attachment.
yeh the unevolved androids.
i never used to be afraid of death. but as the years go by i am more afraid of being alone. maybe because i am still looking for some meaning. it comes and goes. like the death and birth thing. but to give life..
although i wasnt an only child i felt like one alot because my sister left australia to go overseas when i was young so i didnt see her or have a relationship with her for many years. so it was just me growing up.and still we struggle to be close sometimes.
i am o blood group and i am right handed.
anyway blah blah. i am saying goodbye for now
‘pf’ was a typo silly. (of)
You’re not that dumb;)
hehe who said i was dumb!
plutopuppy,
i want to ask you something.
what does it mean for you to surrender?
Along with what P.Puppy said, the state of surrendering indicates that we have “had enough” and the logical answers / explanations no longer suffice. The fabric of our lives is starting to interface with moments of truth. Circumstances are climaxing and converging to a state that we find unacceptable. Therefore, we have a choice to make. The classical “high road” or the “low road”. The backdrop for this choice is ourselves – our truthes. If we choose ourselves, we walk away from all that we “know”. Look around you…looks pretty real doesn´t it? It isn´t. Anything that you presently do or think will not function. You feel a myriad of feelings – most of them will inspire fear. Literally, when this time comes, you feel out of your element. Your “essence” says, “Walk on water”. Your logical mind says “I don´t know how to swim…I´m gonna die…suffer…I can´t breath water…!!!” Panic,depression etc. can follow. Hence, the Great Surrender. You can literally fall, blindly into your true self and this new way of viewing the physical world…Since most of us are not so good at diving head first, this process can take a life time – (or Lives?) At this point, you face what most people consider a “harsh reality” because, as I said before, all societal rules DO NOT APPLY!!!
This is a process that requires support based on LOVE. It helps if someone can guide you – but the truth is, no one can do it for you. The only thing anyone can do for you is continuously “boot you” back to yourself and encourage you to see it. However, such persons are considered “cruel meanies”. This is a big “joke”. We all know what real cruelty is.
gatubela,
first up i want to give you a hug.then make you a cup of tea. i want to tell you everything will be alright.
this is alot about boundaries and feeling confined by them yet still wanting them. we all want to feel safe and secure.to feel part of a collective whole. to understand our place as humans on this earth. i think humans generally have shown great stupidity but they think they are the intelligent beings. bah humbug. i think you question things alot yet you are still looking for a place to land. yes the truth in yourself. i CAN relate to what you are saying. if i was to really go to my own truth completely.. well i would probably get locked up or put in a mental asylum.i mean..maybe i wouldnt.. i dont know. i would probably last be seen running naked through the dunes speaking my own mumbles and grunts. ha.
we as humans have been extremely conditioned.. in thought and belief and language.THIS is how it is. they tell us. THAT is a chair. THAT is an apple. THAT is a configuration.THIS is desire.THIS is love.THIS is hate . THAT is good.THAT is bad. etc etc. we are so moulded. most people adhere to it. they accept it for what it is and stumble their way without big questions. ‘Ignorance is bliss’ they say. maybe it is. but if you choose the other road.. the bigger picture, the questions. well this is how it is.. the dying while living.
alot of this is about mortality and giving meaning to life before death.
and yes it is something that can be done with another.boots off i think and socks too..
although socks if soft and clean might feel nice.
It means to surrender to the power of our sensitivities and fears of not being accepted.
thankyou
P.Puppy,
Yes, well a loon is a water fowl that has a haunting, erie call. They only call at twilight. They are extremely territorial – One couple per lake.
“True Power” is a very heavy responsibility and requires PURITY and self discipline, as it indicates the ability to “materialize” thought patterns without the negative “ricochet”. Continous and consistent self transformation as you must be flowing with the “UNIVERSAL”. This is a responsibility that I have upon my shoulders.
Hmmmmm…..No more “swooping down on Fluffy Bunnies” for you if you are involved in these kind of energies.
My brother is a Scorpio. His gf is a Scorpio…& I dated a Scorpio guy.
Scorpios are indeed very charming people…and ppl will find them very irresistible…
But what I can tell you about my bro, his gf and the guy i dated is they use their charm to get what they want…
I am not complaining about my brother as he is after all my flesh and blood…but i can’t stand his gf…she is jealous, possessive, revengeful and scheming…in short, she is plain evil…she will do anything to get what she wants…so, never step on a female Scorpio’s tail…
About the guy i dated…he flirts with practically every woman he knows…well, not that it’s a big problem cos it’s normal to flirt…the sad thing is he could be very into you, n the next thing you know, BYE-BYE !!! from being the perfect lover, he could be the COLDEST stranger you never wished to know…he will make you fall in love intensely with him and after satisfying his curiosity in you, he will lose his interest…so think carefully before you date a male Scorpio…
Anyway, I believe there are good Scorpios out there…believe it or not, it’s up to you…all the best !
The male Scorpios which leave you dangling on the potential love vine… are, in my reality not harming you at all. They have detached themselves and their INTENT is not to infiltrate your mind and emotions.
In deadly, evil contrast… you mentioned the female Scorpio.
This is a woman who is can’t evolve. She (her psyche) is dominated by Pluto and Mars. In other words, she controls the minds and members of the majority of men in her in environment. How?… If you put a Conniving, Non-Spiritual, Very Subtle… Hidden Agendas and Soulless Motivations + a seismic SEXUALITY… you can begin to image the effect she has on the submissive male.
A male Scorpio is no angel… but at least he will be direct with a woman, leave, or go and deal with his own ambivalence in his cave.
A female Scorpio does have a cave to isolate her NIHILISM.
She infiltrates and dominates the reality of weak and unskilled males.
So, it is important that people see or most important Feel… what a Scorpios Intent Truthfully is before they proceed any further.
In many ways, it takes one to know one, so I have learned much about the dark side and can sense the slightest sign of deceit;)
I meant to say that she ‘doesn’t’ have cave to go to.
Her cave is through the domination of sexually bland and passive men. Their (the guys) mind, heart and genitals.
She literally OWNS males.
P.Puppy,
I have a question…
The “seed” of a vibrant man-upped male…under the correct conditions of the feminine energy, in your opinion, what does it “grow” into?
im feeling so angry.
and twisting pain. and hurt. and confused. and numb shut down. used refused misunderstood.trapped in grief and pain and want to kill them and kill me and shake them and tell them what its like shake them and tell them to stop and listen and give love. but its not happening. NOT HAPPENING. aurghhhghgghghhghhhghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i know that feeling Umm if its any consolation, i feel helpless, my guts are in knots, my heart is broken into tiny pieces and the only way to deal with it is to get to the bottom of what happened, why suddenly something that i felt was so clear is now so jaded and blurred. I am so restless to th point where my own discoveries of getting to the core of the scorpio is becoming obsessive. i am at the point where i need to clearly try and get ahead. I want to shake them too and for them to realise that i have given whole self. I have opened my doors and my arms to let them in but its very hard when it feels like the door has been shut in my face. And the stupid thing is i miss the contact, i miss every part of the shaded and unreliable person. How can you break through to someone with selfish motives, is it all just a complete waste of time? Surely if i question religious beliefs, i would feel that i have been dished a rough deal, this helplessness is not good and i am not able to find a way out of it. feeling alone, unloved and totally rejected because someone else has shut down the defences and made me feel so deeply lost. Its like grief, grieving the loss of my soul, my heart and also a loss of faith and hope that has enabled me to carry on this journey.
You’ll be alright Leonine. Detach yourself. If you know the flow energy is a one way street, you can do something about. Move on. Socialize and gather inner confidence. Don’t fall into dependency ruts. I believe that he is selfish, but I also know that anything you do or say will change his behavior in the relationship.
His concerns in other areas of his life, are prioritized above you… which actually a good thing. But the kiss of death is… he really can’t or doesn’t want to INVEST his time in you. That’s the reality.
Umm,
The same message goes for you too. Find outlets, hobbies, passions that can cultivate more emotional independence. You guys need a distraction, something productive and meaningful that can heal your souls… you can do it… just make conscious attempts to create your happiness and stop trying to vacuum happiness out of males who don’t want to share it with you.
The bottom line is… whatever circumstances you’re both in… you can be objective about it all. Keep away from expectations and acknowledge the men for who they really are. As demonstrated through every word they say, and every deed they do behind those comments.
Create happiness. It’s dormant, but right there inside of you.
but i want the seed from him!! i am distracting myself. but its been two months now and im going crazy! he is still ignoring me. but i know him and i know he wouldnt have shut down his heart. maybe he has. i am doing volunteer work soon. i miss him. maybe he doesnt love me anymore. maybe i need to find someone else, but i just cant! like my legs and feet are in glue his love glue!!! but maybe i am just being foolish. and he has decided to not want me anymore. cant stop crying. dont want to eat anything except chocolate and milk and toast sometimes. cant sleep properly keep waking up feeling INTENSE loss and unbearable grief. and there is nowhere i can go to to make the feeling go away. and maybe he is fine and not feeling any of this. i am so afraid of being rejected if i talk to him. like falling off a cliff fear. sometimes i just want to die cos its too painful. only a week before he was at my house last he said he adored me. how can that all of a sudden just vanish. i am hoping a storm will throw us at each other.
“but i want the seed from him!”
Remember the lesson Umm.
SEE people for who they really are.
You won’t change anyone. The only person (emotions) you can change?
You guessed it.
You;)
so you are saying he doesnt want me. that i must change my emotions toward him and shut down my heart.because i cant change him and if he really wanted to be with me he would be with me. is that what you are saying?
… “will Not change his behavior….”
I’ve had word lapses in my typing.
Gat,
The flow of energy between man and woman is give and take. It’s always fluid and finding new meaning, discovering new horizons, deeper intimacy and fulfillment in ‘the Now.’
So if two mature adults are in sync psychically… eye contact, mutual respect, really hearing each other, communicating honestly and supporting each others needs… the Seed… grows from a little green sprout in the fertile mud, into a majestic 150 year old Oak Tree.
Gat, the slant of your question is also very rational and logical. Neck-up stuff.
It’s important to remember that ‘Energy’ is a flow of Consciousness between human beings. It is a beautiful paradox of subjective and objective expression and reception. It’s a psychic dance, if you will.
So keep with the flow, your breath grounded, eyes concentrated and focused. It really is simple Gatubela.
The Source of all life and death will take good care of the rest.
Trust;)
Energy is the Intelligence of our Hearts.
wow umm we need to talk? any way you can send me your email i am trying to remain anon or msn really we’ll get each other through
leonine,
i could create another email.. yeh maybe msn? im not really up with it all. send me yours if you like.we can all help each other here. p. puppy is right but it still hurts and well i am just not someone to give up on love. i am doing alot of thinking, feeling and trying to understand what has held us back. there is a heck of alot to learn. i feel like i am in my prime now. you will be ok. it will all be ok leonine. big hug and big breath in and out. you ARE lovable
most of the time i am able to be objective and see him for what he is. and i still am able to do that. but he needs to be less stubborn at the moment. time is up time for action. i got the message already. he is just burying himself now. the thing is that if he is the seed giver shouldnt he come to me ?
leonine,
i have just made a yummy bowl of pasta with lots of goodies in it. wish you were here and i would share it with you!
you too gatubela and pluto puppy!
I AM FERTILE MUD!!!! sigh what to do… make mud pies out of myself. yes and then i will throw them at him.
Hi sweeties,
Don´t forget that I had mentioned the “Black hole compression unit” when it comes to scorpios. This is because the matter that enters does not escape…
Ladies, life is so precious and so magnificent. Even having the opportunity to talk to you is special and to be treasured. I understand your pain, but I also know that you need to believe in yourself and make those baby steps towards your own happiness. Your scorpios are extremely “disrespectful” in a profound, spiritual sense and they should be ashamed of themselves. Not because of the “Bad” that they have done, but because of the aftermath of their energetic effect on you. Usually, a scorpio “KNOWS” their effect on women. If I know I have a weapon, I will certainly use it with the utmost caution. I will learn to control my “urges” to shoot, I will leave it in a safe, secure place, and I will use it only when absolutely necessary. I will also perfect and train myself to “shoot” better and more precisely. These gentelmen are “energetic gansters” shooting around without descretion.
However, if these men are “energetic gansters”, then you ladies, have made an interesting choice in falling for them.
I have a friend who also was affected by her scorpio husband. She was on medication, with suicidal tendencies, and with dilusional episodes. I was able to heal her, with my own scorpio channelling. I took her “negative” energy and relieved her just enough so that she could start to “see” again and of course, to understand how to heal her. Healing a person is an act of love. Also, I was able to warn her beforehand, what her ex-husband would do, almost with in a month in advance. I supported her until the last consequences. They were not pleasant. This allowed her to prepare herself and not be surprised. Within 2 weeks, she was off the medicine, then she stopped smoking, stopped the cocacola addiction, and understood that she deserved to be happy, and begain with “baby steps”. Now, she is working, on her own, and feeling better about herself.
You must understand, that I did not say that her ex-husband was a bad person. He was greatly misunderstood, greatly disrespected, and greatly underestimated. She had made a very serious mistake. Even though he attempted to get even, I still have a little soft spot in my heart for him, and therefore, have not retaliated back. I am still a lady – only when necessary.
In addition to the excellent advice that P.Puppy gave, please consider Reiki, accupuncture – specifically asking to balance the masculine-feminine energies, and then get a therapeutic massage, relax and feel…the…love. Remember that if you do not fall asleep during the session, the massage has not been effective. Then, start making those baby steps to your well deserved healing and happiness.
Also, wish the best for these scorpios. Their path will not be easy as they will surely be the creators of their own fate.
Hi P.Puppy,
No, my question only appeared to be “neck up”, but only in the context that I continued with the “seed” image that you had initially supplied. (Its all nature for you…fluffy bunnies, panthers, eagles, phoenix, seeds…)
I grew up in the country – you know, beavers, racoons, wolves, skunks, dear, cute bunnies…all in the back yard. The Canadian geese used our grainfield as a fattening up stopover before continuing south.
Scorpionic energy underlies your ambiguous answer with various, deep, dark, energetic undercurrents.
Yes of course my answers are ambiguous. The neck up is logical and “fix it” oriented.
My comments are not about thinking. They are written in hopes people can gain more insight into their Emotions. To find power and meaning in their emotions. To acknowledge the depth of emotion in ones-self and Not Run Away From Them.
You out of all big heart Lions should realize that brilliant relating is about hearing, feeling and speaking- Awareness in Truth. Always.
Also please be aware that I am an Idealist in matters of the Heart and Soul.
My goals in life are to Transform misunderstandings and communicative blockages into a common goal.
Diplomacy is a gift most people can’t learn. Because diplomacy means one has to deeply IDENTIFY with another person. Most critically amid Friction, Turbulence, Drama, Confusion, Conflict and Despair.
A persons reality, their habits of life, are tremendously drilled or conditioned into their hearts and emotions.
Like Umm said.
Society conditions you. Culture and Gossip.
The ‘Root’ of who you are is left undiscovered.
Hi P.Puppy,
Evoking emotional responses in a society which attempts to follow a predictable linear systems approach can possibly lead to “Chaos” and nonlinear behavior – and thus, the collapse of the first “system”.
We are “conditioned” beings as you said. Functioning on the basis of the “roots” of people, would lead to “being”. Have you “envisioned” this new world? Where do ideals fit in?
We live in chaos. This is the reality of life. We live among poverty, cruelty, greed, lust, perversion, division on a multitude of levels. Pervasive Control is present starting with our parents, then our friends and neighbors, then our teachers in religious ideologies and academic doctrines. Control and Obedience Rule the masses.
This same Societal Control- INSTILLS FEAR.
Outward Chaos will always beckon. You must accept imperfections in every circumstance of life and in person.
However,
On Deep, High, Spiritual Planes of Consciousness… we can Identify with such control and fear.
We can Transform Conformity, and Find meaning through Unity.
But before one can even sniff Pure Individuality- Within the Identification of The Whole (Collective Awareness), one must find meaning, personal meaning above the limitations of earthly dictatorship and illusion.
The idea is this … We are Conscious of our Uniqueness, we don’t submit our uniqueness to the collective mind.
Yet… we still thrive in harmony among the collective mind (conformity) by Centering our Being in THE MIDDLE.
What is the middle?
The middle of subjective ambivalence and objective projections.
We human beings LOSE OURSELVES in the PROJECTIONS of a moment. EVERY MOMENT.
So to not lose ourselves in other requires???
… Yes… a connection with a Higher Consciousness infinitely Greater than our Illusions of Attachment.
More ambiguity, you’ll have to excuse me.
Nope, this time, it was a clearer and not so ambiguous.
Well, I have some ideas as well.
After someone is actively participating in this environment, they start to develop very interesting abilities. I will not get into them. The higher consciousness does not exist for existing. The energy would not permit that as it is constantly moving.
I have never put it in words before, so if I sound ambiguous, you must please excuse me.
You master yourself on the physical, shed off all excess unecessary energetic shackles that “limit” you, connected to the higher consciousness you become one with it and Learn -The lessons are extremely harsh as you come to realize the difference between illusion and reality. All must be shed.
Why do you mention darkness as being your friend? Where does “light” fit in under your creation? I feel that one requires the other, as they are not opposite sides of the coin, but an infinite continuation of one another.
Gatubela and all other vibrant young women of the world.
Take Notice.
The movie “Twilight- Eclipse” is opening tonight.
Millions of gorgeous beauties will be going gooey over the vampire guy.
Why?
His character is- Symbolic- of a Highly Evolved Male Scorpio. I kid you not.
The power, the knowledge, the sexuality, the intense desires chemistry of Pluto is speaking to you through that movie.
He is solitary. She is illogically drawn to him. Her wisdom feels ‘the pull’ of Pluto.
Watch the movie. The entire series.
I advocate it.
For your bellies and the consequent feeling which arouses between your thighs.
hehe.
yeh its funny its called eclipse. i havent read the books or anything. but i did notice an extreme sensation over the last few days with this one we just had.
vampires…..
so does that mean you have to wear sunblock during the day pupster?;)
and if she is so drawn to him.. is he then to her?
what happens when they unite COMPLETELY once and for for all…
no dont tell me.i already know.
this goes back to the seed and mud thing we were talking about and selflessness.dying and rebirth
i do have some questions about the tree though.
i am having this intense feeling in my heart. and he doesnt know.
ok. all i can do is just trust.
P.Puppy…
If I want a feeling “between my thighs”, a movie is just not an option. It takes a lot more than that to get me going. (yawn…stretch…secret smile)
P.Puppy,
What happens after you are connected to the higher consciousness and have learned what must be learnt i.e. shed all of the illusions of attachment?
Well, for me, you are in “no means yeah” world. Meaning, you are all, but you nothing. Complete, but incomplete. Going forward, but returning. Time should move, but it stops.
Infinite possibilities but must choose one in order to live in this “physical” aspect. It is the quality of your choice that determines the quality of subsequent choices. Therefore, one must recognize the power of choosing. Not to be taken lightly. You must master this state of being as well. More and more, you feel alone, but have never felt so well accompanied in your life.
and then…
And then you learn to channel energies and “create” in an immediate or direct environment in which you can not have any “illusions of attachment”. Mistakes and impurities are costly. The shedding of illusions continues at a much harsher pace. As you go deeper into yourself, you go higher.
All “karmic” engagements are freed.
You gain access to various frequencies of energy that are “flowing around”. This means that they are always there, but we normally do not “see” it.
This energy is wonderous – it is the “source”. And it is a very infinite creative/destructive energy.
It is to create – on the basis of universal love.
I am at this stage – and learning more every day, as I begin to materialize my very humbled, loving and pure thought patterns (verified and double checked against the universal) and master myself even more.
In comes scorpio…and says that he “knows me”. (Darn it, I thought I was working undercover!)He gives me that “At the count of 3 you will be ….NAKED..1…2…3….NOW!!!” stare.
I had to check to see if my panties were still on!
Ah, what the hell, SO WHAT if I dont have any panties on? … Or any other garment of clothing…AND??? Next time, have some more respect.
I DID NOT give you permission. (Cat scratches on the face)
Well, after that, things got interesting.
it IS interesting that in this life no matter how many thoughts we have and ideas and memories and projections of creation and death we have it always reaches a point whereby it naturally takes FORM and becomes physical.
movement is a neccessity as humans. even the monks have to get up from the lotus position to eat and poo. hehe maybe s.ex is just like that- eating and pooing.
hmm. the world is very overcrowded with humans as is it.
gatubela hehe i can just picture what you said.
the permission thing..
thats the vulnerability feeling.. when you feel that someone else can see when you are ready before you can.. they are in fact directing the force of life.
but.. but…
where it stops.. like a record going round..then hits a scratch and keeps repeating.
what happens next? yes record gets taken off and a new one is put on. and the moral of the story????
oh my god. i think have gone mad.
no. just the humans on this planet. ok so we have to now redirect it huh? thing is i also think that humans have whatever coming to them cos they are stupid. (putting on the bear suit now) . this age of computers and and mobile phones and ipad ipod bluetooth firewire usb hardrive external gigabyte ram file google you fuckbook .. INFORMATION OVERLOAD. and i am sitting typing on it !
sucked into the vortex. we are becoming more and more SEPARATED. physically. people have become so lazy. and cut off from NATURE. and i am on this computer trying to explain something that is feeding on itself. sigh.
i miss the old days. the gadgets are exciting and the seeking and learning and uncovering and nobody really knows etc and its all so damn exciting. yes. but NOTHING IS REALLY CHANGING. except it is only feeding on itself.
i have to stop and have something to eat. hmf and none of you even know the colour of my eyes.
…”i.e. shed all of the illusions of attachment?”
Hey Bunnies, I don’t imply that we are to completely detach from everything. If we were to detach from ‘all’ mundane necessities, goals, relationships and entertainment… we would associate with ourselves in the manner a big blubber jelly fish would.
The key here, is to BE DISCERNING. In every aspect of life.
Discernment and discrimination can improve the quality of our life. Definitely. Because we learn to assimilate what is ‘of real value’ to us, and what is a complete waste maniacal time.
Now, “values” and “principles” can mean a litany of different things to different people. The importance of discerning what is healthy for our hearts and souls, and what is toxic and detrimental to our time (our daily lives) is critical for cultivating happiness.
Developing a Uniqueness (an Identity) which runs against the grain from conformed social, familial, educational and professional contingencies… represents ‘the act of discrimination’ in motion.
The goal is to locate happiness in ‘everything’ we become apart of. In all people and all circumstances. In means being skeptical while being optimistic. It means being rigid in sincerity while being open minded to other experiences of life. It (discernment) means not to not repress, but rather to Express. Without guilt, shame and fear. It means to hold strong convictions while still respecting another persons reality. So in order to feel real joy in that place of mind, that state of consciousness… we must learn to witness ourselves being the exact cause for that un-happiness. Through the vehicle of our Choices.
The world doesn’t owe us a single farthing. People don’t owe us apologies, or sympathy, or pretentiousness.
We owe it to ourselves to handle inner issue.
We are the people who must be held accountable for any void in our lives. Not any other person, or people.
Becoming awake of every little choice (in our attachments, and what we detach from)cultivates a special, life invigorating self-awareness.
Scorpios are said to be extremely selfish. We can now see why this fixity of self happens.
It is because Scorpio, on many intangible levels (unseen phenomena) always want’s to dig deeper and always ‘know’ the “Why” behind all things, people and experiences.
We… All of you have Scorpio conflicting somewhere in your psyches, hearts and souls.
The key is to know what and how to handle that affliction, on a minute by minute basis.
From an onlooker, that behavior would be perceived to be as ‘selfish.’
pluto puppy bunny,
by the way i am not a bunny.ok? i am the great white ..shark yeh that’ll do. for now. and no sharks dont eat bunnys or vice versa so dont worry.
big blubber jelly fish.. hmm sounds like a nice existence.
i know what you mean re the “why?’
do you see yourself having a tree?
if so who with? sorry what with?
yes i make choices as to what i want in my life and what i dont. i am discerning, but it just gets me down sometimes .. im ok. thanks.
there are some other questions that i asked you previously. could you answer them too? thanks
hey leonine.. if you are around.. are u ok??
Hi Seeties,
Mmmm well you are in “no means yeah world”. This is a state of being that also indicates that while you descern EVERYTHING – and live each moment to its fullest possibility, you do not ATTACH any illusionary ego projections. What you said resonates with me.
Words will not be able to explain how much I understand scorpios. However, it usually starts by FEELING / EXPERIENCING their pain. Every one thinks that they are secretive – nothing can be further from the truth. You need to know where to look. They are very expressive in the “unknown”. That is my world too. Who is the cute adorable Bunny now?
“big blubber jelly fish.. hmm sounds like a nice existence.”
Ahahaha, that one made me laugh out loud. A lovable quip.
And Umm, you are a skittish bunny. In all of your fluffy innocence. You’ll just have to trust me there.
Gatubela, you were indeed ‘discerning’ in the digestion of my previous comment.
It looks like that little slice of awareness is working already.
Thanks ladies, I have a busy day ahead of me.
pluto puppy.
quip. havent heard that word for a while. hehe.
you still havent answered my questions though. have a great day
Hi Ummmm,
One can naturally PROJECT a limitted interactive prison. Or one can CREATE through unity and interaction with the “Source” energy. They are completely different.
Projecting is when “what you think (or what you do not think)” determines your (present) comfort zone of comfortable living and experiences. Creating requires you to go outside of yourself (ego)and experience a state of ESSENCE or ESSENCIAL LIVING. No thinking here. All “projections” will crumble most painfully down. As you start to master yourself, the most profound projections are most painfully dismantled. It is important that you first develop and explore the concept of “STRENGTH”. You can not continue on this journey with out it.
Hmmmmffff Between you and me Ummm, I dunno what it is with P.Puppy…calling us Bunnies, when his “last name” is ….”Puppy”.
are you saying i dont have strength? and..that i project?? prison?????? wha??
do you have kids gatubela?
Look, ALL women are bunnies in my world.
Except of course, the odd women who grows a mustache, or downs a whiskey and throws left hook over someone commenting about her facial hair.
Not magnetizingly feminine by any stretch of the imagination.
Deep inside a woman, I see (x-ray penetration remember?) the qualities and divinity of her playful little girl. Regardless of her age.
Did I mention that I can feel her soul? LoL
“Puppy”… you ask?
A puppy is playful and lovable. Even though I may have created a vicious army of female foes who detest me… I really can’t stop them for that.
Each woman has the right to perceive a male Scorpio in the only, or best way she knows how.
And lastly, it should be evident that I don’t care how people view me. Yet, I DO care if a woman wants to argue with me instead of?? Relate with me.
There is an enormous difference.
I want Harmony through conflict.
I want Resolution through confusion.
I want Intimacy and Transcendence through those relationships of any significance who are mired in the problems, and blind of the solutions.
I want Transformation in everything I touch (feel).
I don’t see problems. Even in the worst of fights.
I see hope. Love.
That’s what it means for me to be intense.
I can’t help that. I was born with it;)
plutopuppy i just watched a movie called ” bright star”. moving to say the least. i recommend it to you.
may it inspire you further..
hi umm. No, i did not say you did not have strength, only that strength has to be explored. This is not related to having children but is the foundation for the experiences of dismantling the ego. However,to answer your question, yes i do.
hi p.puppy. Of course you see souls. So do i. when scorpio scans, they share a part of themselves as well. You know that. in spanish, puppies are cachorros. The diminuitive is cachorrito. These are the adorable cute puppies that you want to mother and they make your heart feel all warm and fluffy. if you perceive feminine divinity, what might i be perceiving?
Well before the word “Puppy” in my pen name, is… Pluto.
It’s quite a paradox and a contradiction. But that is exactly who I have become.
Pluto is the antithesis of “fluffy.” That’s a given.
Along with the ‘Jesus Consciousness’… Pluto, Lord of the Underworld… “Knows” in detail occult secrets, energies, controlling unconscious human life.
Death -(Pluto-Scorpio) does know, Life -(Leo-Sun)… in the occult experience.
But Life mostly Does Not have a transcendent relationship with Death… on deep, subconscious levels.
Life is happy, playful and content to experience ‘the Knowns’ on the surface of this earth, while Avoiding the perils and ambivalence of the Underworld, simmering inside the earth’s core.
So Pluto, in a deep psychological sense, also in an expansive philosophical sense… Transforms the moment of both worlds.
The Feminine Energy = The Love Energy.
The Masculine Energy = Is Not the Love Energy, in terms of the masculine energy is a Man’s level of Awakening. His Seed. His Proven Character in life, which is a by-product of his Consciousness.
So it is the Masculine Seed who pumps the Feminine with greater meaning through Love.
He ignites, or most commonly dilutes (in reality)… a meaningful transmutation of Love.
Divinity is in everything around us. People, Nature, Cities, Consumerism, a whole host of “things.” But it is also True to state that many human beings are not compassionate beings. There are Reptiles in this world. People who are devoured by their Demons. Their Souls have been eaten away by Vice. Their lives have not discovered Virtue.
So my point above, is to reinforce the idea that loving, caring people… are innocent in their Goodness… but are separated from Darkness in themselves and in Other people.
And importantly, both (all) male and female contain the masculine and feminine energy.
The real question becomes, to what degree. And HOW does a male a female utilize these polarizing energies.
p.puppy, i do know death. You see, i have died already. Dark occult energies are part of spectrum that i perceive. You have activities that most would not perceive, but i do. These creations do have a fabric. Male and female energies have to be mastered by all, and then balanced. Through being, we learn compassion for our polar opposite ,and in being complete, we are able to love without attachment to ego. Death is full of symbolism , so is darkness. The physical body is ‘dismantled’ and we go to heaven or hell or ‘limbo’. Birth , or creation, is the blend of divine feminine and masculine, and is also symbolic. By balancing our polarities, we can create individually. The path is simple but the cost is dear. Strength is a good place to start.
p.puppy, he ignites. It is pure fire. He looses himself in her as her soil covers the seed. She channels the energy that makes the seed grow. No difusion occurs if it is done right. He ignites but she is on fire, as she burns for him.
I have known that you have ‘died’ Gatubela.
That’s divine. Life is full of little deaths. And I also know that you have become stronger and wiser through the process.
You have ‘allowed’ the Source of this Universe to teach you unequivocally by facing the shadow of death. That requires tremendous courage, incredible seeking. Because you have learned, realized, that TRUE STRENGTH is in… the Surrender.
And you have discovered that the more you have found an affinity with Surrender, the more you have been Invigorated to LIVE life.
So I respect you and your journey. But your journey has not finished. It is just the beginning. You have more Re-Births to Illuminate you, more juicy experiences to Transform your heart, mind and soul.
That’s beautiful, Bella.
what you are doing is beautiful too. It requires a lot of life energy. Your approach is rather forceful. Perhaps the world will be a better place. The change has to ‘planted’ first. You knew that.
The approach of indifference does not change the world.
Choice and Action do;)
… and being held accountable of ALL the ultimate consequences regardless of what people think.
i went through death and birth. I have two birthdays. The first is leo, cancer moon. The second,piecses, scorpio moon. my journey will deal with my ability to create and destroy. I was so involved in learning to create by mastering my own polarity under extremely adverse conditions. I am starting again . Terrible things happening in my life is not an excuse to not feel and act divinely.
there is that word again “think”. . . A child – blonde hair , cries in anguish as he feels acutely alone and unloved. it is soul wrenching. he is a beautiful child. no one sees his angelic innocence. . . . Of course we should be forceful and act. it is worth the passion to make the world a better place.
Hi Everyone,
Transforming or Transcending? One only changes form, the other passes beyond the current limitations of understanding.
It was the “Question” I asked that took me down the “Fluffy Bunny” hole.
How one must sacrifice many things and pass many trials and tribulations in order to acquire the perfect balance.
Male/female i.e. domination and subserviance, at any extreme or unbalanced state is not true love energy. Love does emerge as they begin to harmonize, in both men (paternal / masculine) and women (maternal/feminine). Love is always Giving and never Taking. If you WANT, you are not loving “TRULY”. You are not even loving yourself truly. As you learn to not want, your energy grows and eventually, can transcend your very existance. Release is important – from all pain. I usually can take pain and transform it, and give it back to the universe. Darkness “Falls” off me, as well as other psychic intrusions. I have battled in the known and in the unknown. I guess that would be another “heavy topic” and a bit too “loaded” for this forum. Sorry Umm, you did ask the question of what my sign was.
P.Puppy, …no ego here – somethings are definitely worth my feelings of vulnerability, You are one of them. This statement goes beyond the “known” limitted, imprisoning societal concept of male female interactions.
I don´t care what people “think”, I do care what people “FEEL”.
Truth be told, I know that I’m much more outspoken than other male Scorpios.
I know about seven other male Scorpios. They are like brothers to me. It’s remarkable how private and discerning we all are. Each one of us has our own life philosophy, so of course I don’t intrude on their inner realities.
We talk about women, we talk about what drives each other. And in perfect paradox… we don’t “hang out” like packs of males always do. It’s incredible how we all walk our unique separate paths, while still keeping in touch on occasion.
If a group of cute bunnies were to see a group of male Scorpios socializing at an event or bar… those gals just wouldn’t get it. And let me tell you, women are EXCELLENT at discerning a guys body language on the subtlest levels. Definitely.
Gallantry and Respect, are silent Virtues which resonate between male Scorpios.
Much of what we say is cutting and to the point. You can imagine how much time that saves. Each one of our Identities are strong. Each one of our Egos are defined and refined. So when discussing women, we are not like a group of common dudes salivating over their dreams to have a beautiful woman like him, and be with him.
Life is far deeper and more expansive in our (Scorpionic) realities then that of constantly seeking something ‘outside’ of ones-self (women)… in order to be free and happy.
The classic male Scorpio, never gives away his personal power to a woman. Ever. He may ‘infuse’ his power into her divinity. But he never ‘relinquishes’ that power.
Because the millions of men who DO relinquish their identity and strength, don’t realize that their masculinity is being compromised for the intent to gain love and acceptance from a woman he knows he can never have.
To ‘magnetize’ a woman into our orbit, basically means that we reign in our intense Desires of the moment.
Because the bottom line is… there is no way in hell a male Scorpio will allow a woman to control him. Meaning his life path and unique purpose.
She can come along for the ride if she wants. But she will need thick skin and a heart of gold to even come close.
so….
what is your life path then hmm???
yes.. more questions.
you spend alot of time talking about women. maybe that is your life path.” she can come along for the ride” and what is the point of that?
for one who seems to denounce the rules, you certainly seem to enjoy the stereo types and cling to them.
you speak alot of power and control.
i see power in surrender.
i have yet to see you do that.
– Umm,
I’ve spoken objectively about many things, many personal things.
I won’t answer your questions because I already have.
You just haven’t read my comments closely enough.
If you want to discuss my ‘lack of surrender’… all I can say is that you’re idiot.
My personal expression on this site has gone above and beyond the choice of not writing anything at all.
Your question here… ”she can come along for the ride” and what is the point of that?
Again, if you don’t understand that, than you need to ask your LITERAL questions elsewhere.
I don’t have the patience;)
pluto puppy,
no you havent answered my questions.. not specifically. i have read your comments.all of them. and no i am not an idiot and dont appreciate being called one.did i ever call you an idiot? all i am saying and you dont have to get angry with me, is that i have given you my time and listened and responded to you yes my choice-and i just wanted you to answer my questions.. yes one of them was about a tree..
come on pup lets get real here enough of the fluff talk. its all about procreation. i do like the way you explore things and well thats obvious. otherwise i wouldnt even be here. whats wrong with literal anyway? look i am sorry i upset you, and i know there is something in you that .. well i just wish you wouldnt try and defend yourself so much. ok so yes maybe you are fulfilling your definition of surrender. i just dont like being lumped into one heap with al the other ‘bunnies”- ( honestly it makes me think of playboy bunny) how would you feel if i did that to you? lumped you in with all men( i mean puppys?) but you dont want that you want to be in the scorpio clan.. blah blah etcetc. i LIKE scorpios or i wouldnt be here now would i? this isnt a competiton pup. so you dont bite me.
i do understand more than you think.
actually i wanted to ask you how things were going with the taurus girl? i do care
The tone in your initial comments were provoking me to do exactly what you ask. And because I didn’t comply to your literal agitations… you got cranky.
Literal is – the Personality.
Soul Centered is – Consciousness.
I am not going to literally explain to you what consciousness is or means, because as mentioned prior, I have already shared plenty of that while you get all stubborn and rationale.
I couldn’t care less if you lump all men as Retards or Pigs. I really don’t care. Say what you want. I am not governing what you want to say;)
Be you, that’s all I expect.
damn i just wrote a whole page and lost the lot.
i will start again.
sigh. i AM me. who else can i be?? it is a ridiculous concept to think i could be anyone else.
i am just trying to understand who you are. look i may seem like an idiot. literal. simple. blah blah. whatever . i am me. and i have no intentions to hurt anyone.no i cant talk like you can. yes i am pushy sometimes. impatient. because i want to help you as much as you help me and this has nothing to do with power or control.please know this.
i dont think men are all retards and pigs.
i really appreciate your honesty here .
i dont really know why i am here anymore..
i came here to this site out of curiosity because i wanted to see if i could gain insight to understand him better. the scorpio man i have known for six years.i miss him. terribly. its not getting better its getting worse.
yes i am on my own path. but for me that path has been about him and me. that is where creation is born. but does creation have to mean loss? if there is birth does there have to be a death in its place? i guess biologically there is. i should be discussing this with him but i am afraid. yes fear. the one that i am imagining.
i have been triggered by stuff you have said- the swooping the women the come along for the ride. .it all sounds so shallow and then that makes me mad cos i know in your soul that is not who you are. sigh. maybe it is. makes me think of him and then i feel jealous and angry and think of dishonesty out of protection..think of him with other women. i hate it. i only want to be with one man. and if he wants to be with more women than me well he has to be honest but then he cant cos he will probably lose me . it is this sick feeling in my gut. i want to trust. i think about the seed thing and then the death thing and well does he want to plant alot of seed? but its not really planting unless they fall pregnant. otherwise its all just IDEAS. ideas need form to take shape. they ultimately become physical. then there is death. then birth.
i feel like i am in limbo between the two. i am so deeply afraid of loss. he has not much money and now lives in a tent. i am torn between wanting to go over there and cuddle him and keep him warm to just letting him have his space. sigh i miss him. we fought so much. feels like everything that i have been building is crumbling without my consent. i have even in my mind tried to accept that there may be other women and let him have that. but i know that it is taking the trust away from him and the focus. i just wanted him to trust me. it felt like he was always looking for a reason to prove his love for me wrong, like a way out of his feelings for me. i felt so hurt that he didnt know the depth and believe what i felt for him. sometimes i know he did.i dont want to be on the regret pile. maybe it is all out of my control. i feel so sad. i dont know what i am trying to say anymore.
I speak in metaphors, or in pictures.
So it will require of you a good amount of imagination and intuition to understand my ‘swooping’ abilities.
You are mistaken ‘thinking’ I am shallow. The content of my comments have meaning. Not some tangible meaning that you could deposit in the bank like a Taurus grinning smugly at the local Bank.
No, I don’t look like a pale faced vampire. Again, these are your earth-bound literal perception.
I ‘swoop’ without the desire of picking up women. Believe it or not.
The ‘seed’ are thoughts, ideas and behavioral characteristics which a man could ‘penetrate’ inside a woman… IF, he had those gifts within him to begin with.
So ‘the seed’ is not about his wild impulses to fornicate any maiden who wants it.
That level of evolution is known as the “Lower-Self”… or Animal-Self. That CONSCIOUSNESS is everywhere in society. A guy cheating on a woman is not an extraordinary event. Once again, that consciousness is everywhere. It is behavior without self-control and HIGHER PRINCIPLES.
Fears of dying inside, maintain the stagnation you feel inside. Growing doesn’t mean how tall we get, or how fat a woman’s ass gets… Growing, evolution MEANS how we develop new forms of being from the inner caverns of our psyche, the ambivalent storms of our feelings, the emptiness in our heart, and the salvation of our soul.
Doing and adhering to the same routines for 50 years in our mundane lives does not mean we change.
Emotionality and facing the death of change, shapes new and different realities as we experience the essence of life.
But no change will ever happen without letting go of heavy earthly perceptions. When we can look inside, when we become inquisitive about how we can become Happier people, we learn to TRUST the Surrender of a life-worn-thin pattern, a distant lover, a menial job, a shattered goal, a stack of money, or tonight’s rib-eye steak. We learn to adjust, to carry on without fear of newness and we forge ahead sans fears of family/friends dogmas and bone dry density.
Get the picture?
yes. i have a picture. thankyou.
do you like pepper sauce?
i am not a taurus by the way.
so why do you swoop? what is really going on for you with that stuff? and be honest.
“sigh. i AM me. who else can i be?? it is a ridiculous concept to think i could be anyone else.”
No. It’s naive to think that you are not a different personality to many different people.
pluto puppy,
you said to me to be myself and that you expect that.do you feel i am not being myself with you?
i guess we are all multifaceted beings.
i am not the greatest with verbal expression.written. it doesnt mean that i dont feel it. when i read things i can be overwhelmed by all sorts of things.. and sometimes i just dont have much to say.
i know i could use my imagination to understand your swooping. but it is not mine. ( the swooping)
so my imaginations may be wrong. and i cant be bothered right now. i have apple crumble to bake
ok.
so silence from your end.
you said before ” except now i am the one swooping on helpless women”
and then you said ” you swoop without the desire of picking up women”
you see this stuff is really fascinating to me. hence why i am still here. i want to understand.
i really do . without judgement. whether or not i relate doesnt matter pluto puppy. we all make our own choices.and it is not for me to make judgments on you or your life.
also,
i AM earthbound. i am in a physical body. i walk on this earth. planet earth. i have blood in my veins and a beating heart. i need to eat to stay alive. i was born from my mothers womb.
i understand and have deep respect for the spirituality in nature. even though i fight it and fear death at times. because i dislike how humans have created capitalism as a culture. the west, the white man. it shits me. it REALLY SHITS ME. no wonder so many people are so lost and depressed and struggling to find meaning in their lives. we have become so removed from respect of nature.
i am earthbound. just as you are. that does not mean that we are governed by consumerism.that there is no connection with higher consciousness . in fact there can be true pure consciousness by accepting our physical state, and knowing, feeling sensing the whole bit, that they are connected.words are limiting when it comes to describing things that are indefinable. and we can go round and round and round. do you like mandalas? and wow now i am on another tangent.. yes the spiralis of life. ha. it is fascinating.
i bet taurus even though she may seem earth”bound”( hehe my mind had a thought of you two!) she can be a grounding anchor for you at times.
Understood…
You know, one of the reasons my life is in danger and I lost everything I owned is because I viscerally believe that control is “criminal”. As I said,some things are worth fighting for…personal freedom is one of them. I was silent for 15 years – had to learn about the new energies I was dealing with. Too much explosivity.
I would do it all again (hmmmmmmm…no, I would do it BETTER).
Please do not worry about any personal drama on my part – words will not convince, I am sure. My skin is not tough though, it is pliant. Thickness would make me an insensitive, stubborn, opinionated Boob, who could not listen / perceive / feel others or myself. However, if we go into what shell(s) I may have…and whether I peep my head out of it…that is different. Most people perceive me as serious and quiet.
I also have to keep to my path too – I have already “transcended” once…me controlling others is death / stagnation to me. I do ask that I be admonished when I manifest even a micron of that behavior. One micron for me, will exponentially affect my world. I have, however, protected my most precious treasures – my children, …which may seem controlling, but my(our) life is in danger. My true motivations were to give them their freedom. I did verify this against the Universal.
Well, since you mentioned the word power…Let us go beyond male / female concepts. This should not be an issue for both of us, as we are not asserting anything over each other. I am of Japanese descent – and respect is important. I will ask your permission this time, to continue our conversation.
Gatubela, it is truly great that you have you’re own path to walk. I can see that. I can also see that you are a genuine soul searcher. I give you full credit. You want to understand the reason for your being before you ask blind questions about another.
You can relate.
And for that, you rock.
And you don’t need my permission for anything. Don’t be ridiculous.
You’re a Free Spirit.
Let it Shine.
That’s the whole basis of this discussion and the people who contribute their lives to it.
email me at:
plutopuppy33@yahoo.com
if you want to talk to me privately;)
Hey Umm
I really felt like i was reading my own current situation, i have been dealt some very harsh words lately, my positivity in this is still carrying me forward but the last message i had from the Scorpio was so cold and callous it has set me back somewhat. I can’t sleep, move on or put anything into perspective. I am not sure if he wants me anymore or whether the words he said in between the rejection actually meant anything (to which is what i hold on to)i am trying to pierce through him, i know there are other women and i am trying my utmost to be above all of them, whether it will work i just don’t know. I suppose i just have to understand that maybe he will get bored of them too, or maybe he just got bored of me and is letting me down gently.
Umm any chance you can give me your email addy?
hey leonine,
i was wondering if you were still around..
sweetie. what were the actual words he said to you?
are you certain he is with other women? what have the interactions been like between you over the last few months?
i am here to listen and support you where i can. i am also trying to understand what is happening in my life. maybe we can help each other! pretty overwhelming stuff. rejection in any shape or form hurts like hell. i understand what you are feeling. putting the kettle on now..
as i said before i dont have one to give out. (email)as yet.
ill see what i can do. just means i have to set it up and that will take time. are you sure you dont want to talk here?
hiya
i don’t mind talking here but i feel exposed and kind of hold back on a lot of things because of it
let me know when you get an email addy
all negative stuff was said in terms of trying to get me to leave by the sounds of it. All very difficult and confusing, like dangling a carrot!!! no reconciliation but no ending either, just limbo and then abrupt exit
i am trying to get email seems to be taking a while to load up.. bah. hopefully it will work soon.
ah the dangled carrot! i know that one.has he actually said to you that he wants the relationship to be finished? he could just be needing space but isnt comfortable asking for it. my experience has been that they dont like to ask for things, it makes them feel vulnerable and opens them to the possibilty of rejection. and also they want mutuality so if it isnt there for them they will leave rather than be in an environment where they dont feel appreciated or feel an open exchange of energy. it is often layered and complex.there could be other reasons.. like how he feels in himself as a man.. has he talked to you at all about future stuff?
ahh yes the future with such hope and now with no hope. I did the cardinal sin and got in touch first to be greeted with negativity. How long has it been since you heard from him because even days with me are endless.
it has been two months since i have spoken with the scorpio i have known.i still dream of him but my sleeps are a bit better.but yeh i have been a mess to be honest.. never cried so much in my entire life. not sure where it al stands now. i guess i will at some point need to find out. not an easy thing to do. i have been focussing more on me now and getting stronger in myself and so my thoughts are not so consumed by him. i miss him very much. miss he friendship and closeness.when its good between us it has been fantastic and when it is bad its a nightmare.
can you try to explain to me what exactly was negative with the reaction when you made contact? might have to break all this down to get to the bottom of it.
how long have you known him for ? how did it start..etc etc. where did things go pearshaped?
i have also felt a shift in his energy recently, although a few slight twinges of thought. He hasn’t grasped the connection or in a sense he has surpressed it greatly,its like we talk about the same man. Mayve i need to go and get hold of a less meaningful scorpio and try and fathom the depth there, without the pain!!
leonine,
gatubela said some wise things back in her post 297?
where do you feel his energy shift to?
ugh the email thingo not working. silly computers. said the system was down!
hi umm
i would probably need to go more in depth via email really, sorry to be such a pain!
It started harsh and yes reciprocation and a very strong will to tell him of my love did kind of change the direction, if not made him a bit defensive in the process but this could be the abruptness and shift that i felt. I think maybe if i am truthful in my very positive light believe that my perserverance and talk of not giving up may have stopped him in his tracks, however this could also be where his control is not being adhered to!! hence the reason for the rapid departure? who knows, i think i may write a book on this!!!
ok got an email set up now.
umm235@yahoo.com
Hi Umm and Leonine,
The mind is a powerful thing, as it struggles to conceptualize the unexplainable.
Getting involved with your scorpios will take you further down as he deals with his own emotions and at the same time, resists anything that may control and cloud his ability to make the most correct decision – for him. He knows that if he can not handle himself, he will not be able to handle anything. Again, he may FEEL, and you may invoke FEELINGS – but if he feels that he is in any way “NOT WELL”; he will walk away, and strangely, even “SACRIFICE” the relationship. This is not to bring you to tears – it is a way to avoid the problems that he already knows will happen. They could be on his side or on yours. As he brings his emotions to the full possible expression and possibilities of them (fluctuating from heaven and hell), to finally decide and discover his “masculine” self, you stand there, to be left to discover your “feminine” self.
The only issue is that he knows this, and you don´t. Therefore, there is a purpose with him as he feels and can not deny his own soul as it struggles to free itself of all that is limitting.
If you look at the phoenix, the most important image is not that it rises from the ashes. No, it is the way that it does it. The energy that it requires to rise – this energy is untamable. It burns in the heart and if you are sensitive, it burns in the immediate environment…and the people that could be close by. The phoenix rises, to be free and fly.
For me, it represents the soul energy – and its powerful need to be free under the repressed conditions that the mind imposes.
I can not emphasize how important it is that you feel your own “fire” FIRST. You are only radiating puffs of smoke.
Ladies, you must let this bird fly. It has not mastered itself yet, and until it does, it will burn you by returning and reflecting all limitting toxicity as it struggles and REBELS. The struggle is much bigger than you are realizing, because he is battling with his “SOUL” and you are not. When you start dealing with your soul energies, you will feel the same way. I assure you. It is another world.
You must choose. Accept and Release him. In doing so, you release yourselves. In doing so, you will start to have an idea of “No means Yeah” world. Have a good cry. Pray to God. Understand how the energy in relationship physics works. Be strong – the strength is not in the mental conviction. Strength will come from your oceanic depths. Do not listen to your mind. What you think – if you have words for it, is going to take you in the wrong direction.
gatubela,
you are very eloquent.everything you are saying is making perfect sense to me. it IS what i feel inside but have difficulty putting into words. my situation is different to leonines though. but i understand we both get caught up in fear.i have given him his space.i know of his inner struggles. he knows of mine too. when i am in my heart and not my head, things are more gentle. and clear and pure.
i do battle with my soul gatubela. i also know that this is about the finding the feminine self and the masculine self.and what that truly means. i have spent the last two months reflecting and yes crying and praying.i know alot of this is about me releasing my old self.and him too.
i have let him fly.and i do understand no means yeah. i am tired.very tired. i have other struggles yes more fucking fear.. and its to do with time and my age. yes i know you dont operate in that world but just understand for a minute where i am at. i have limited time left to have a child. but i have been unsure most of my life. this stuff is hard to talk about. im tired.sorry
I kind of had an imgage…It may be hard for me to write down well.
There is the possibility that you are not seeing that he perceives the totality of his issues and yours as one. Meaning, he will not differentiate between the two. I know that you are writing down a very condensed version here -But scorpios are capable of taking your relationship issues and dealing with them as their own…as they receive…perceive. In a strange way, they embrace it and investigate it as well. They may be seeing your “FEARS, FEELNIGS OF REJECTION, SADNESS, SENSITIVITY, ANGER”, and all of the things that you have mentioned, and incorporating it into his analysis of the relationship. While you are feeling anguish based on one moment of the relatioship, and therein, subsequent, crescendoing moments, they may be seeing it on a more continual, global focus.
Another thing is the concept of masculinity and the fact that it is dignified. A scorpio is refined, even if they are blending in with a bunch boozing, farting “pigs” who are swilling themselves to insensibility… A well defined strong concept of dignity, indicates the quality of choices that are being made – under any cost – even emotional ones – as the soul energy vehemently REJECTS anything not “PURE”. This being said, if a choice has to be made between their dignity (well developed, trial and tribulation tested, concept and value associated with SELF), you can guess what will prevail. Love is not an excuse to get sloppy – it is THE fundamental REASON, based on truth. We are not forming guppies here. We are developing backbone under fire. Believe me, it burns until all is done, and all is well.
thankyou again gatubela. your words go deep inside me. resonate with me. i want the backbone. sometimes i feel lazy or fear or uninterested tired i analyse too much and i know that is just a perpetual cycle with no real answer and it does keep me in a place where my heart is closed. i feel quite misunderstood though alot of the time.
tell me about jealousy
Hi Umm,
Please understand, that I do understand you …most compassionately.
So, let us begin to talk about jealousy. Are we talking about yours or his? The reasons or source, will be different.
So, as you indicate, he is possibly with other women. What a Putz! (“#$%%) (first girlfriend gut reaction). What is he doing? Friggin¨ guy knows exactly what the hoohaa (#$**%) he is doing ….TO YOU. Same thing happened to my girlfriend. I can not tell you how STRONGLY I feel that it is UNFAIR, that this man is playing unfairly. You see, you do not know what this guy is doing, but I do. I can see their energy in the fabric of the “unknown”.
Still feel that “tug”? Still feel like he is “near”? Still feel his INTENSITY piercing your soul and how you gave yourself to him? Would it help you if I say that this unevolved scorpio callously uses his energy to satisfy his desires? Please understand that an EVOLVED scorpio would NEVER – NEVER do this as the expenditure of this type of energy with out verifying against the universal, leaves a person drained and “lizard-like”. They even look “grey” to me, when I see this. The same intensity, but working in the grey area – or the “known/neck up” arena. Scorpios usually should radiate black / white vibrant energy. He needs to adjust his “man” pants so that they are firmly placed.
Why am I adopting this tone in describing this man? Because an EVOLVED scorpio would use his eagle-eye phoenix risen energy to heal you and let you go. Believe me, they know how.
Well, the problem is that you are still thinking. Therefore, you will not be able to heal yourself Umm. The mind struggles for its survival and produces the fears that you talk about. It is incapable of giving you comfort. Therefore, it torments you. Continue Umm, even if it tires you. You are starting to “fall” into the depths. Eventually, you should see glimpses of “oceanic” tranquility. They will be fleeting, but they should appear.
This is THE BATTLE – as you bravely fight all of your fears and decide “F#$K this S$/T!!! I will not live like this!!! And fight to define your “SELF”. That is why scorpios are such warriers. The inner battles have to be fought and won – FIRST. THEN you love. Channel your love for him, into love for yourself and FIGHT. Even if you are weary. You are worth it.
My pom poms are out, and I am cheering for you to not give up on yourself.
gatubela,
i dont know for sure if he has been with other women.its not even about that. evolved unevolved i dont know. wow its pouring with rain outside now bucketing down.
we have both been jealous. and alot of the fear has been mistrust. ultimately fear of loss.his lack of trust initally sparked my lack of trust and it snowballed. then we both sat on the snowball and squashed it. then it grew again.
sometimes i felt he was jealous of what i had that he didnt have.but you know… things could be so very subtle. his intention was really to help me be aware of myself( a bit yuk sometimes) any smidgen of ego on my part would be crushed immediately by him. i think sorry feel that alot of it was his own fear that he himself also felt as a man and would channel through me( his percieved fear that he wasnt good enough) .to make it clear again. he would lose himself in me and i would go looking for him he would feel a mixture of elation, guilt, anxiety and feeling patronised.i would also do the same and he wouldnt look for me-much as i wanted him to – i learned that well still learning that he has found me already and i have yet to find him, and that sometimes i get tired from looking and need to rest and he must not feel rejected from that. and the times when i do find him maybe we could just sit back and look at the clouds and hold hands for a while.
i like pom poms. i remember making them.i had a pom pom beanie as a kid-all the rage in the 70s.
i heal myself everytime I literally go into the ocean. i love water. been there every day lately. saw a whale yesterday with a baby not far from shore and a big pod of dusky dolphins this morning. i will never stop loving him. i will never give up on myself.
big hug 🙂
“… A well defined strong concept of dignity, indicates the quality of choices that are being made – under any cost – even emotional ones – as the soul energy vehemently REJECTS anything not “PURE”…”
The Truth in these words are symbols of greatness.
Gatubela, thank you… for sharing this insight. I believe there is not one person in ten million who would know (or be aware) of such a thing.
Brilliant.
gatubela,
what made you think he is with other women? did i ever say that to you?
shit sorry i just realised i had put that fear out there. sorry gatubella.
im all over the shop at the moment.
i get the feeling you are wanting me to give up on him, and i feel annoyed with you. and patronised.
stuff going on in the planets too.
im too emotional for words now to be honest.
Here’s a quick guide for the Piercing Eagle.
Taurus sign: (old patterns)——>Scorpio sign: (new possibilities):
• Opinionated……………………………… Sexual
• Greedy…………………………………… Understands power
• Fearful…………………………………… Magnetic
• Retentive…………………………………… Self-controlled
• Lazy……………………………………… Intense
• Materialistic……………………………… Passionate
• Indulgent…………………………………… Strong-willed
• Jealous……………………………………… Piercing
• Stubborn…………………………………… Investigative
• Fearful of change…………………………… Ingenious
• Slow………………………………………… Deals with death
• Overvalues self………………………… Confrontational
• Undervalues self……………………… Loves Mysteries
• Stingy……………………………………… Creative
wow so you’re crazy about her.
now tell me the similarities
Ummm,
By the way, would one fear be based on a type of mistrust?
Umm,
The above keywords illustrate personality behaviors (mundane indulgences and blindness) – into- core aware-self behaviors, energies, consciousness, values, principles… ABOVE the limitations of fearful earth.
To answer your question, I no longer date the little Bull. We are too different, we are nowhere near each other spiritually as she is ruled by social power, status-> at any cost through materialism.
She cannot be with a stronger male. She needs to dominate her mate and feel in control.
She doesn’t have a natural inquisitiveness regarding her pain and failures in relationships on all levels, especially her professional relationships.
She has is addicted to work. And a slave to money. I foresee a lonely woman who desires acceptance and love from outside applauders. I foresee no introspection at all in her, and if she does reflect on her issues away from me, I foresee her incapable of fighting the inner battle. So if she doesn’t understand her inner battle, she can never seek avenues to free herself.
As I have matured, I now withhold investing my love on the deepest and fullest levels. She doesn’t see identity and boundaries. In short, she is naive and fragile… and she’s 29.
And I’ve realized that I feel an intense “pull” to women who are lost and out of reach. Women who I know are bad for me.
I too am learning about what is healthy for my soul. I’m learning about making the appropriate choices and taking the healthiest actions.
It hasn’t been easy with the depth of feeling I always feel.
no i bet it hasnt been easy.
is it possible to also focus on what draws you to someone as much as what repels you?
you have alot of energy and want to heal others. it might make others feel vulnerable and fragile though. is that such a bad thing? can u take comfort in the beauty of that fragilty too. she may feel that you do not accept her for all her faults.no one is perfect. we are all learning. and some at different rates than others , and we are on our own paths. i do understand your intense desire to connect. have you ever had that? how long did it last and how did it feel?
please dont withhold investing your love on the deepest and fullest levels.
Hi P.Puppy,
I wrote you a mail. Did you get it?
Gatubela
Yes, thanks Gatubela I received it. I’ll catch up with you in a short while.
Lower Manifestation —- Higher Manifestation
• Overvalues self………………………… Confrontational
The subliminal Truth in these words intrigues me to no end.
I laugh at myself, because without a shadow of a doubt I can be confrontational.
But deep down, I know that when I confront, my intentions are to destroy any “old thought patterns” and CREATE something more nourishing in the exchange.
Because by arguing redundantly from no common ground, people will and do “argue” over and over again… but the Truth of what is REALLY bothering them, remains dormant in their oppressed Subconscious.
I actually get satisfaction from exposing a persons True Pain by channeling it out of their Subconscious.
Thus, this is why I am either liked and have loyal friends… or I am despised because of the “Hidden” fears I draw out of people.
I suppose I could decide to shut up, and never speak as I see fit.
But in the ancient Scorpio Code, a choice of muteness is a choice lived in fear of what people may think.
Graciousness and Compassion are my allies. Yet I won’t always be compassionate to people if I feel a moment is being abused or denied out of fear.
yes. it is kind of cheeky too. has anyone ever put gaffa tape over your mouth?? he is very provocative. i recall chasing him down the street once after he opened that naughty mouth, we were both kind of laughing at the same time. i have had to prise pillows from ontop of his head.
i had my hand over his mouth once and he tried to bite it. then he’d run off and i’d just pull his pants down so he would trip over.
and other times we would verbally reach an end point and resolution..and get to the truth in another way.
Hi Umm,
I sure would love to go to the ocean. One time, I was in Copacabana – in Rio. It was nice to be up at 5:00 in the morning and go for a dip. Sometimes we need to grieve – for the loss of the “old” in order to accept joyously, the “new”. Take your time to do this. Inner conflicts /anguish have a tendency to make a person turbulent as we learn to internally (essentially) stablize ourselves to harmony, instead of externally (mentally) seeking stimulation as a quick fix it.
thats an early dip.
i am continually letting go and grieving old to accept new. have done all my life. meaning, my inner processes.
hows things going with your man?
Hey,
New to this and find it intriguing..all the posts..these guys are getting so much airplay and I can’t believe our own capacity to reduce each other to desperate, blubbering wrecks who can only exist through the love of another – and what love is that? I include myself partially in this; partially as I am not a blubbering wreck – yet! I absolutely will not let anyone do that to me. I am simply perplexed and now getting annoyed at the AWOL nature of my scorp. after all his declarations. I thought scorps were about truth and directness…they are obviously the biggest bulls******* around!!
“I thought scorps were about truth and directness…they are obviously the biggest bulls******* around!!”
LoL… well the one you picked, that is.
I hope you can gain harmony through inevitable conflict. If you can find mutual solutions, both of you guys will grow.
But if the conflict contains ‘bullshit’… LoL, each of you will spin doughnuts of nothingness and keep each other in the dark.
It really does take balls to speak openly. That is freedom in my world.
That is why I have been emphasizing the Value of Truth throughout this website.
In my belief, it always comes back to the consciousness of the male (regardless of nature/sign). What is he made of when things are not roses?… What does he actually stand for when conflict is apparent?… and How does he handle himself with a woman? Does he explode to find a greater mutual solution through the experience? Or are his explosions Unconscious. Almost every time, it’s unconscious.
We humans, can’t teach maturity.
A woman has many changes in her mood swings and feelings on a minute by minute basis.
Her hips expand through childbirth, her fears of aging and not feeling attractive enough scare the daylights out of her. And so the list goes on and on.
My point is that a real, mature male must understand a woman’s moods and complaints, and NOT FALL into those negative feelings himself. I truly believe he must set a rock solid tone and absorb a woman’s complaining while loving her in practical demonstrations of affection and foresight.
Easier said than done.
Male Character, is developed through virtue amid millions of ‘Conscious’ choices.
Best hopes;)
im crying now.
why
Mel Gibson has Mars in Scorpio. He’s a Capricorn Sun.
His wrath is coming from an intense place of hatred… for… Him-self.
With his financial clout, he believes himself greater than the Source of this Life, who bestowed upon him that immense financial wealth in the first place.
It amazes me how a public figure like he, can be that lonely and deprived inside.
I too have Mars in Scorpio. My aggression has to be ‘consciously’ contained, in my Capricorn Moon.
His vile behavior, anger and lack of spritual essence have created a dark “reputation” (which is very important through the Capricorn psyche) as a “misogynist” through the world media.
I really learn a great deal of how not to behave from people of so called influence.
pluto puppy,
yes you have the same moon placement as the scorpio i know and love and miss.capricorn. and i know that containment you are talking about.
my moon is n scorpio. so it is similar in some ways but also different. i feel so much that its hard to contain sometimes.
Umm, it is no wonder you feel so deeply with that Scorpio Moon.
I can connect with you there. It must be difficult for you to understand, those gut wrenching emotions rising from a primordial place inside of you.
I seem to attract many important conversations with Scorpio Moons, online.
I suppose the stuff I talk about can reach your beautiful souls.
And I’m sorry for calling you an idiot.
yes i do feel deeply.
i dont know and understand half of what i feel.
when i was about four or five i used to talk to mum about why i was here. and that i wasnt the chair. or a piece of wood, or the fork.and i kept saying over and over to her that i was in this life and then i would die.like a question but also telling myself.
it was like i found it baffling to accept. how i was different to the table. still find it difficult to explain because it was a feeling.
plutopuppy,
thats ok. im sorry too.for the stuff i said.
just read up about mel gibsons drama. pretty full on. i think its pretty cruel to put a personal phonecall like that to the attention of the world.who knows whats really going on. the whole fake stuff he was talking about was kind of funny at first, i liked in part his honesty. but then his pain became so clear. the love hate attraction. i dont know what has happened to him in his life. all i remember is those early movies he did when he was still in australia and he was a fine actor.then he went to the u.s. and i lost interest after he went all mainstream. i do remember a film called conspiracy theory that he did-i kind of enjoyed that he seemed so engrossed in that role.
reckon living anywhere surrounded by fake plastic people would be challenging.i have heard stories of girls as young as 14 wanting fake boobs these days. and even their bits altered to look like porn stars. its so distorted and sad.
In no uncertain terms, he is unable to handle his intensity.
And sheer intensity, is Emotional in it’s origin. Not mental. Not intellectual.
I’m talking about all people with strong egos and identities. Not just his.
So if an individual Nature, of primordial Intensity, does not know ones-self in dignified detail, their deepest emotional self, their darkest issues… they can never evolve from the inside-out.
The outside illusion to blame the world remains. Even if you are worth $850 million.
So in my view, he has no emotional IQ. The sheer oppression that has culminated from his (outward) intellect spews forth the self-loathing you hear on the audio tape. In addition, the liqour he’s addicted to (Satan’s Sauce)… doesn’t aide his lack of emotional identity either.
And I bet you the highly reputable shrinks whom he hires, have no clue about helping him identify the ORIGINS, or the CAUSES of his behavior.
I’m pretty sure those high paid “professionals” are simply a sounding board for his insane turmoil.
They don’t and won’t get to the root of the matter and help heal him. After all, if a shrink helps identify ‘an Origin’ in their client… the client could begin to heal and not return for redundant help. Ahhh, the lucrative bliss of $500 an hour.
There is audio to be heard from taped phone calls.
If you wish, you can hear dimly evolved Mars in Scorpio out for blood right here:
http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2010/07/exclusive-new-audio-mel-gibson-admits-hitting-oksana-threatens-kill-her-listen-it
i just listened. actually made me cry.seem to be doing alot of that lately.
i could hear the hunger and desparation in his voice. reckon he should just get out of hollywood and all its trappings and come back to australia. he has enough money now.
addiction is insidious.he is in the crazy cycle.
500 bucks an hour?? yes sometimes shrinks end up making people feel more confused. the “origin” ..i am interested in psycholgy etc philosophy.. but you know the isms and schisms..same as in art and music. this is this theory this is that theory..”.its from your childhood, its from your upbringing its from your environment its from your relationship its from every past existence you’ve had its from the madness in this world..” maybe its NOTHING. then sometimes it EVERYTHING. people tend to get caught up in linear ways of being. problem? fix it. start to finish. i dont know if i am being clear i am feeling emotional .
i had a short lived friendship with a capricorn woman a few years ago. we met while she was living near me and we decided to work on a creative project together. she was very cold in her emotions, very repressed, it was just work work and it had to be her way or the highway quite controlling. then during the process she would just break down. cut a long story short she used me. i learnt a lesson.she was devoid in her soul of connection. she was looking for it but she had to learn to open her heart. listening to this tape of mel and oskana reminded me of her. they are both capricorns. and like the girl i knew, serious and wanting a deep connection but afraid to lose control.
i have another friend who is cap. she struggles with the same issues.
why is there such fear in vulnerabilty?
Hi Umm,
He is alright. Somethings are so, so beautiful, it is excruciatingly painful. When I see something, it still means that I must live and give even if my heart is breaking. I saw something some days ago, and I am still crying about it. It just means that when the moment comes, I have already grieved and therefore will be strong and do what is required. I already know what I must do. Cycles begin and cycles end. He deserves the best in me and then some. I can not repay him for all that he has given me.
In other apsects of my life, things are coming to the point of FINAL battle. 10 months ago, I protected the angelic souls of my helpless children and I went to the streets. I lost everything physical and materialistic- and was completely humiliated in the worst forms possible. Crimes were committed against me.
Today, I was told that I was going to get justice. I long to rest easy again.
why is your heart breaking gatubela?
i dont exactly know what has happened to you that has made your life such a battle, but it doesnt sound good.
sounds like he has helped you greatly.
you have endured alot of pain in the last few months it sounds like. i can feel it .
Hi Umm,
I am alright now – as acceptance and love is really the best way to re-establish the flow.
Yes, I have “gone through alot”. I am healing now – but the issue was really to make sure that I my children healed. I have received congratulations – as they are strong and healthy with a touch of attitude (mmmmm). With time, they will feel even better.
gatubela,
that is good you are taking care of your children. i cannot comment much because i dont know the full story.
all i know is that children need to feel safe secure and loved.
i am reclusing more and more.
i have seen scorp out and about( mainly by the beach) but we havent spoken. still ignoring me.
this is ripping my heart into bits.like a knife stabbing pain.
i feel like vomiting. vomiting out my heart and its twisted wretchedness.fuck love fuck love
Hi Umm,
I hope that you had a nice cup of tea. Big hugs and support.
I had a pisces girlfriend who I mentioned in an earlier post – she was married to a scorpio for 14 years. The moment came when she realized certain things that indicated that the marriage was not working. It was also extremely painful for her. I hugged her during her crying sessions, I served her tea, and looked after her house and daughter, so that she could rest a bit and heal. Eventually, she was able to come to a decision. That she did not want to continue like this anymore.
I have learned to get up and do things, as pain should not be an obstacle to not love the other beautiful things in life. One day, you will heal and LIVE – and not suffer for him.
It is the moment that gives anguish – it will pass.
So, do not recluse yourself so much. Something was not right – from the beginning. This something was always present and you have always felt it. As time went by, it became more noticable. For some reason, it spiralled out of control. (pride, emotions, anger, mistrust) This was because of a lack of love in dealing with this issue. Or rather, the predominance of fear. It came to the point where he is now “excomunicating” you? I am very sorry that it came to this as it seems that you still want to work it out.
Since you have not dealt with your fears, you are still suffering. I read that you are a scorpio moon – so could your emotions are fluctuating from one extreme to another? The only way that you will calm them down, is to focus on your heart. Not the one that is breaking, but the heart energy.
When you are at the beach and you look at the ocean, perhaps you can catch a glimpse of its immensity and its calmness. Your mind and emotions will not permit you to see it perhaps, so it may take a while to go further down. Once you feel it, it will guide you.
I implore you to never ever give up on love – Your scorpio was /is an important part of your life experiences, and you are a better person because of him. Even if you are hurting now, you are going to be stronger when this is over.
When you are stronger, you will realize that what should predominate in any relationship is loving acceptance. You accept him – for who he is. It is acceptable to end the relationship. He accepts you for who you are – it is accpetable that you end the relationship. This is the beauty of Free Will. Ultimately, this does not cause pain Umm, only liberation. Why be in a relationship that is hurting you? Nobody owns anybody and it is harmful to entertain even the possibility that we have some control on anything. Give…Give…Give!
On a lighter note, How many times do you go to the beach? What color is the water? Is it warm? Can you swim in it if there are whales?
i have a question. my scorpio man has gone totally cold with me and this is our first “cold” spurt. i thought everything was so amazing and now out of nowhere, he hasn’t talked to me in WEEKS. i feel like he’s completely over me but i have no idea. my pride is hurt and so whenever i see him online, i can’t bring it to myself to msg him first if he HAS moved on. i know scorpio men need their space. should i wait to let him come to me? should i send him the first instant message? so confused. i don’t want to lose him forever.
hi umm, i just read a bit further up where you were angry at me. I did not mean to sound patronizing-sorry. I also dont want you to give up on your scorpio.
thanks.you just read my mind.
i am going through some big and let me tell you BIG inner delvings right now. serious work on me to see the truth.im sifting through all the crap.
might talk to you a bit more about it later.
at the moment the ocean is cold. very cold. darkish blue depending on the light.i go there to surf mainly. whenever there are good waves.and yes can be out there when there are whales, but not too close!
Umm,
I am glad that what I said resonates with you. I think that it is incredible that you surf – wow!!! It must be an incredible feeling.
yeh it is a pretty good feeling. you should try it some day i have heard sth america has amazing waves. i love being in the sea with the smells and the water all around me,every time different, constantly shifting and changing,,the wildlife,the clouds..the colours,the moods of the ocean.its another world for me, away from land, but to look back onto the land with a new perspective. and the waves, its an indescribable feeling to ride them. i love it.there is no time or thought, just being purely in the moment with the energy of the wave. in fact i am heading out in a minute..
sounds awesome. Don’t know if i could do it. but i like the way you describe it. Makes me feel wistful. Maybe i will do something like go to the mountains on horseback. I always wanted to do that.
mountains on horseback- yum. i had an crazy experience on a horse once ( i am not very skilled btw) i was on a trail ride through a forest and the horse ( being very smart and cheeky) decided to take a short cut path of its own away from the pack.. it darted off up a creek bed.. i hadnt put the saddle on properly silly me so as we were galloping up this creek bed i started to slip over to one side!! i was hanging on for dear life! ducking overhanging branches and basically thinking it was all going to be over for me..then the horse took another turn and there were the others on the same boring path that they always took slowly plodding . joined in with them like nothing had happened. hehe.
I am not so skilled either – I believe I would love to do endurance riding. I used to have an Arabian horsie – gorgeous. Never got to learn though. Darn.
I think that I would like to do survival training in the mountains – I used to be in the Navy – so I understand a bit about the ocean thingy.
In Canada, there are bears, cyotes, foxes, wolverines…and I was never scared to be in the forest in winter or summer. Used to cross country ski for kilometers.
Here, I see some strange bug, and I freak out! Or a lizard. Would you believe that their tails fall off when they are scared? Yuck!
Another thing here are the earthquakes – I am in Chile. Did you hear of the last one in late Feb?
Hi Umm,
I guess we are getting off track of the purpose of this forum.
So, I will say that I am good and my scorpio as well. He is more a free spirit – I am kind of a studious nerd. Always studying or working. Wish it were not so, but it is the life that I was given based on my choices. My choices always have been dedicated to the highest good, to my best(est) understanding. So, here I am.
I will be taking a bit of break from the forum -as I have some matters to attend to. Just want you to know that I worry about you and really admire you. Hugs.
ok gatubela.
i thought about that for a minute and thought well its funny cos yes dont really know each other etc then thought the whole internet thing has its own stops then thought yes not talking about scorps but then thought whatever this is the truth of it and that this is the inbetween scorp woman bonding time. whatevr, hheh. canada sounds beautiful i would love to go there someday.you are a gutsy chick from all the things you have done in your life and very adventurous. nerdy too huh.yeh i feel like that too. i was always the shy one observing everyone else at school. and i like studying to but hurts my head sometimes. i saw a cool thing on sound producing wave patterns using salt on a sheet.
me and my scorp- both free spirits probably. can that work? sometimes it can. sigh things are getting to a point now. i am going to send him something i made.
yes i worry about me too. maybe i am just one of these crazy women that never let go that never move on an obsessive freak! ha. no. i ended it with him… but it was because i thought he wanted me too.there was all this other shit in the way that i couldnt figure out and didnt want to delve for him and i lost my power my strength nd self belief damn it and he disrepected me for it.i didnt really mean it when i said well we are both single anyway i wanted to see if he really would go to see if ths was what he wanted cos if he was truly going to move interstate then i needed to know the boundary or something i dontknow. i was scared he was leaving me.for good.anyway blah blah. been almost three months now. not a day goes by i dont think about him. if only i could hold onto this feeling when i am with him… but why why why does it get squashed? why do i get so numb and heartless and shut down. WHY WHY. like its the end. i am so sick of it and of my stupid brain my way of being that causes me pain.maybe i like pain. i must do. fuck knows. i think about his dogs and how they will die and i wont see them. yeh i want to be strong for him but actually i really just want to be me in all my happiness fuckedupness my sadness my joy EVERYTHING. and be accepted by him.and accept him 100% too. i dont want to have to censor or be fake. i never was at the start. its just this stupid procreation fear.kill it squash it.so scared he will leave me. i even told him that. he was silent. but what if i wanted to put baby in backpack and take him/her camping? i am scared i will go nuts being confined to four walls day in and day out.with no people no change. i want him to feel secure.trust me. i dont want to be with anyone else. maybe im jus not right for him and too adventurous but i do love being at home.. but i wouldnt just want that all the time. maybe thats bad. and selfish of me. i have made a wonderful home and i long to do all that family stuff. create our own quirky ..shit just looked at time i gotta go im late!!!
Umm,
Hi Umm, I don´t feel right taking a break if you are not alright.
You are in the process of defining self. We can not have all of the options open to us. … “home or not home”, “leave him because he wanted me to”, etc.
Umm, it is alright – relax and all WILL BE WELL. When the time comes, you will be able to do what is necessary… that is if you are able to define yourself and find LOVE.
All is possible. If you can feel the energy of the wave – you react to it. If you can feel the energy of LIFE, you will also react just as well.
BELIEVE and trust what you FEEL. In the end, it will not matter if you are rejected or not, are indecided or not…because you are alive and vibrant. You FLOW.
Big Hugs.
Umm,
Fear…I thought I would also give my thoughts on this very important topic.
So…it seems that you have 2 states – one that you want to “hold on to when you are with him” and then there is this thinking part that you have no “control” over and makes you think that you are a pain loving, obsessive, person that must “SQUASH” what you feel are BAD thoughts.
Well, again, what you are doing is absolutely lovely, and this is one of the reasons that I always say that you should be absolutely gentle and loving with yourself. Your thoughts are valid and precious. You do not think so? I do.
Fears can not be Squashed. This is how they appeared in the first place. Instead, they must be lovingly confronted and accepted.
You are scared to be caged in – it is a fact.
You want to have children and are scared that time is passing. This is fact.
You want to take the baby camping. Absolutely possible, even while breast feeding. Just attend to his/her needs, no risky activities. I took my children to the hills. Did not even have electricity or water. The baby was 6 months old.
I went horseback riding with the kids when the baby was one year old. I was with the baby. The horse was quiet and gentle.
I mean, I did not do bungee jumping, ski diving and speed car racing – but I was still active.
What is wrong with being a little scared?
It is not your FEAR that is getting you bogged down, but the fact that you don´t want to accept them. I happen to like your fears. It makes you wonderfully human.
Strength is not in being perfect, or erradicating our own humanity – self issues etc. Strength begins by loving ourselves. Scorpios, perhaps, are not so gentle in this aspect because their eagle eye perception and intensity gives them no rest. He needs your ocean – he will find it when he looks into your depths. You will find adventure when you look in his and he is near.
Again, while you feel these FEARS – do not ACT. As you will loose the “POWER” that you talked about. You can only act based on LOVE – first obtained by accepting yourself and your right to decide. As you learn to do this, you will also do this for your scorpio. It seems that you feel you have to be “Strong” for him. I disagree. You need to love yourself, so that you understand how to love him.
Your energy and all that is you is lovely. I hope that he sees it. If he hasn´t, it is because you did not let him see it because you did not accept it yourself.
im thinking about all this.thankyou. please take your break. i will be ok. i want to respond but i can wait. anyway im not sure what i want to say just yet.processing.
i sent the present i made to him yesterday.wrapped it up and put in in a big box without a note. im pretty sure i saw his car driving past my house yesterday but he didnt slow down. i cant stop crying today.
Hi Umm,
P.Puppy has not been around, so I hope that he connects and also gives some counsel from the masculine point of view. He knows about astrology – I did not really know too much about it. Perhaps you could also talk to him about it. There seem to be some truths in it -although when dealing with the REAL PERSON, or YOURSELF, the theory would have to be internalized and explored.
Umm, there are possibly two things could happen. It will be Yes or No. You must be prepared for both. How you turn out will depend on your inner beauty and gentleness on yourself, and whether you depend on him for love, or yourself. In a way, life asks us to first love ourselves and feel inner joy and THEN fall in love with a man. If you do it the other way, you find love and joy with your lover, and of course, when the relationship ends, it is terrible. He must of been something – pretty fantastic – “WOW” – for you to have felt so much. But, he did not love you in the same way that you love him. You must begin to see your strength.
True love is beautiful – it lets the person gently down. It is done out of – as a minimum – respect for the time that the other person was with you. Even if you fall out of love with the other person, I honestly feel that it is incorrect to decide to “ignore” this person. So what if you had been fighting? Even a fight should not blind the other to what is correct – the relationship exists and should be preserved to the last moment. I understand that you had been together for many years?
Unfortunately, it seems that your Scorpio is not good at understanding this. This means that even though he may be battling his “soul”, he, at the moment, does not understand the concept of Universality. You just don´t leave a person to suffer. Maybe suffering is the way we learn, but one must not consciously do it. Bad voodoo! One holds on to their truth – and gently conveys it to the other.
You also, if you feel that he is suffering, should also not consciously cause harm. Hold on to your truth, and gently convey it to him.
So…you have a decision to make – sometimes one feels that they must learn to give and expect nothing in return. Meaning, that for some reason, you feel that you must “hang in there”, you can do it, but expect nothing. You can learn aspects of Universal Law. You will grow by learning grace, dignity, true love, and that there is no such thing as “IGNORING”. Silly Scorpio!!!
The other decision is to let him go. Put yourself together. Accept your pain and loss and go through the grieving process.
I can´t tell you how important it is for you to start feeling your essence. If you are crying, it does mean that the pain you are feeling is making you feel even more alone and anguished. Don´t worry, it will all be alright, once you have calmed down. Feel the wave – it is asking you to react. At the moment, it is either so big, that you are going to fall off your board and fall into the ocean (the unknown) – goodness knows what could happen in those depths. Or, you will stay on the board, and flow with the wave and feel the sun shining brightly.
Umm,
Another question – why did you leave the present you made for him without a note? How come you did not go over there yourself and tell him straight out what you wanted?
I don´t want you to feel worse that you already do, but it seems that you have to go over there and be honest.
Do that instead of being sad and crying.´
I hope that it goes well for you.
If it goes well for you, I suggest that you establish a rule (and stick to it) that all future disagreements be handled with the clothes OFF. It is symbolic of vulnerability, keeps things nicely in perspective as to what the real issues are – and that the relationship is more important than anything else.
Sorry Umm, Maybe I was a bit too bold.
But when my Scorpio “misbehaves”, its time to let him know who his woman is…that would be me! If I don´t know how to do that, then I don´t know my man.
Maybe I have been in Latin America too long?
gatubela,
its 6am. i just had a terrible dream that i received a letter from him saying dont be angry but he had moved on. it was written on the back of an envelope and stuffed into a pair of old tennis shoes.
i didnt write a letter with the present cos i truly felt overwhelmed with what to say.. fear of rejection i guess. i thought it would seem simpler too by just sending a gift cos it would show him how much i love him by the amount of time i spent on making it. it has a love heart on it. and i thought he would like the surprise. yes i am a coward too cos i am too scared to go and see him.. i would have to walk through the caravan park for ages to get to his tent- owners would see me and i think i would feel embarrassed cos they know from last time our troubles..and if he is not even there then they will probably tell him. and i am worried i will get emotional. and if he says he doesnt want me i know i will fall apart, then to have to walk all that way back. you are right though if i dont hear from him i will have to do it.
yes i agree with you him ignoring me like this is so painful. indescribable. and no it is not honoring all the years we have had together . nothing even seems real anymore. every day i have been just trying to stay alive. i will wait one more week. then i will go there. i feel sick. why would he drive past my house then? just to see if im still here? why cant he just be honest with me. part of me does like the intrigue. i mean i sent him an anonymous present.but with holding on to the feeling of love. then he drives past and i first think yes he is feeling it too.. then i flip and think far out its all just in my head he doesnt want to see me he might have stopped to tell me its over for good but couldnt bring himself to do it.
if it is truly over then i will have a meltdown. i wont be able to stay in this house cos the whole thing i created reminds me of him and me and what i was building. and i will see him everywhere. but i dont know where i can go.i will just want to die.
i have read that scorpios do this just amputate someone, but then they say they often regret it later.
i like your naked disagreement solution. maybe i should just go to see him naked.ha.this next week is going to be hard. i have started a new course and its challenging. im questioning it all. feel like i just want to escape from all the fracas in this world and make a baby.yes with him.
no you are not too bold i like it very much. i am part italian so i understand boldness and passion!
Yes, well one very special and beautiful someone has wanted to know something – and I am sorry that it took so long for me to see it. I certainly have been blind as to certain “origins” of behavior.
So, I am going to dive in – and say that what happened to this person should not have happened and that I understand. I had a rough childhood – and was living on my own at 17. And, considering the needless suffering and damage that it has caused me, what I said would be an incredible understatement. This is hindsight speaking. However, as I have said before, my sucky –poo –poo life and my incredible pain, cannot and does not excuse me for acting badly. I can not say anymore than this.
So, let us talk about maturity – and how important it is to struggle for it before we cause damage to others, but most importantly, to heal ourselves. I ain´t no expert on it, but I do have some thoughts.
Women have an incredible responsibility (men do too, but we will not talk about that). We all want men who are handsome, caregivers, and breadwinners etc. that give us security and dare I say “numbness”? Who make us FEEL? Do we really want manly worries, or do we want to be active participants in life? Men struggle for many things to be called “A Man”. So do women. Do we understand each other? What happens when we don´t get what we want? Do we ESSENTIALLY understand that real MEN need something very REAL WOMENISH from us. Have we defined what a REAL WOMAN is? Nope.
This is not done, because there is blissful comfortable ignorance as to the energies involved – flowing and blocked, in our relationships – I am so scared …etc…because it makes me feel vulnerable. The justifications go on and on. Again, there is no such thing as not being vulnerable – we always are vulnerable. Why are we protecting and feeling fear of an IDEA or CONCEPT instead of accepting the harsh reality? Boy, are we out to lunch on this one.
We are socially groomed to not be passionate and brave. I may have a “weakness”, but if I accept it, define what the “strength” is, and work on improving myself day by day, I will get out of the “I am never happy” rut that I have found myself in. Or the “Victim Rut” or the “Blame the other Rut”…Can we continue being happy about our incapacity and blindness in not being responsible and caring for ourselves – and others? We should heal ourselves first before even daring to touch another precious soul.
Therefore, in so doing so, I will not trespass the “vulnerability” of the people that I care about and love – as a minimum. As a maximum, I grow, modify and transform and subsequently, NOT do that to Humanity. Maybe I will TRANSCEND.
So…my Scorpio may be doing something that hurts me, but I know that it HURTS me. Why go that extra mile and assume that he wanted to inflict pain? Don´t look into astrology, magazines and internet articles. There is a flesh and blood person there who as a minimum, deserves to NOT be part of ego constructed mental non-reality- a sovereign entity.
Under what circumstances would I ignore a person? It would mean that I am hurting, or am angry, or don’t want to get hurt anymore…the reasons go on and on. Based on trying to understand someone else´s behavior though our “mirror”, can we find it in our ego to accept that our behavior is unacceptable (to that person)? Can I actually try to improve myself because I care? What is wrong about being a better person? What better reason than for the person you love? What better reason, if to never cause pain to another person?
What if that person is hurting me? Using my values, I could come to a decision to also ACT as to end behavior not compatible with my values.
If I am really into TRANSCENDING, I will try to proactively prevent and empower the other person from hurting themselves by not hurting allowing them to hurt me. This is weird No means Yeah Stuff.
I will strive to understand the damage that my mental constructs coupled with “EMOTIONS” (with lack of soul energy) can cause and also strive to NEVER inflict such damage – especially to the people that I love and my children. As a maximum and because I have learned, and love my Scorpio, I will strive to understand his emotional pain and its origins. In understanding, I will also understand that he may need my support, or he may need me to leave him alone forever– not because I CAUSED DAMAGE but because I still have not changed and WILL CONTINUE TO DO SO!
If I wish to go further, I will help him with his goals and empower him. This is the psychic dance and why one must cherish, treasure and hold close to their hearts, THEMSELVES, their lovers, their loved ones, their friends and especially, defenseless souls such as children. Ironically, we are all children – and when we love, we are strangely, defenseless.
Women (and men) must understand that they are capable of causing damage to another person due to a lack of knowledge of themselves. We cannot justify horrendous behavior on any basis. You DO NOT cause damage to yourself or others on the basis of LOVE and “I want him back”. Instead, one must decide to END it – first with yourself.
So Umm, no babies…OK? Your child will desperately need you and Daddy to love him or her more than anything – including yourselves.
Just a brief note, I’m dating the Scorpio man since last July 11th, he never says he falls in love, even though, he says he’s very attracted to me and that I’m very special. He only says he is sorry he doesn’t feel strongly as I do about him. He says we haven’t spent much time together as of we live 50 miles apart. Do you think he hides his love feeling to keep from being hurt or what???
Spooky,
Why can’t you just believe him when he says what he says? What does July 11 have to do with anything? you think time will make him fall deeper? I’ll tell you this much, I wouldn’t be falling for you either if you’re displaying such messy feelings, to the point where he has to apologize to you for not returning those feelings.
You know who he loves? the one who doesn’t give a crap!
I can’t believe there’s a whole site dedicated to breaking down Scorpio men. Seems like their pattern is to overwhelm you with attention and intensity (something most women aren’t used to from Vanilla guys)then when they *know* they have you, their prick DNA activates and they have license to be evasive, stop trying, disappear, get sharp-tongued. Screw that! A Scorpio man IS sexy because he’s manly and half the time they don’t smile, oh and the eyes, so let’s just say they’re an attractive species, but for god’s sake, stop fawning over them like you don’t have any sense. Scorpios like strong experiences, and if you’re a weakling who can’t get over it when he doesn’t call after a few days, then you need a life. Also if he disappears for weeks then he’s just not that into you, and there’s even a book for you.
Hi good people. I found this jewel, and it is brilliantly insighful, although quite long.
I hope it can help answer any puzzling questions. Thanks;)
Scorpio holds the enviable reputation of being the most sexually magnetic, smoulderingly charismatic, and psychologically enigmatic of all the zodiac figures. Wonderful! … But there is, of course, a downside (no sign gets it all). Scorpio has also garnered the most derogatory collection of ‘keywords’, with its predilection for subtlety and self-preservation never far from the inference of craftiness, cunning, betrayal, and deceit. Throughout history, Scorpio has been subjected to ongoing slanderous assault: Considered a dark, defensive sign with subterranean drives and a powerful reservoir of emotional energy, Scorpio has often been used as a significator for liars, backstabbers, traitors, thieves, lechers, and all sorts of dubious users and abusers!
In medieval times scorpions were emblems of evil, death, and the serving of self-interest, used as a token for Judas in Christian symbolism because of the deadly treachery implicit in their sting. [1] Fortunately – in view of such disparaging associations – Scorpios are also known for their impenetrable defences, and for their ability to beguile opponents into underestimating both their resilience, and the fixidity of purpose that fuels their interminable self-will.
The dark and heavy emphasis of traditional texts leaves a very unbalanced, one-sided view of Scorpio’s fundamental dynamics. Whilst the essence of ‘darkness’ permeates this feminine, phlegmatic, nocturnal and autumnal sign in every aspect of its symbolism, the value judgements that we place upon astrological motifs are often inappropriate. No sign ever falls on the negative end of a moral trait; it is only bound to representing an archetypal theme and bringing both extremes of that theme into focus. With Scorpio the inference of deceit picks out the theme of falsity and truth; and as we might expect, those with the acuity to be masters of deceit are also the best equipped to recognise it when they see it. In their gift of realising deception, rejecting hollowness and seeing through shallow facades, Scorpios are not afraid to expose realty for what it is; they are the emissaries of a more complete sense of truth than many of us are prepared to contemplate, the penetrating aspects of it often being too painfully sharp for comfort. The paradox of Scorpio is that when it is fooling you, it is not really acknowledging you at all.
Real communication with this sign means engaging with honesty, no matter how candid, sordid or direct. Cheat you it may – that means nothing; when something really does matter Scorpio won’t be fooled and it won’t mess around with either pleasantries or mind games.
Traditionally governed by Mars, Scorpios are genuinely capable of seeming destructive and intimidating, (towards noble ends as well as self-centred interests), because where Mars dominates there is little interest in compromise; the impulse is for active attack or strategic defence, whatever it takes to avoid yielding one inch more than necessary. But the direct, active principle of Mars is sublimated in its nocturnal expression, and like all water signs Scorpios seldom instigate attacks, preferring to hold their power in reserve. This undercurrent of unexpressed energy is the basis of an almost tangible magnetism, a sense of power embedded in the aura that reveals itself expressly when their acute defensive instinct is stirred.
It’s worth remembering that, as much as it may seem a contradiction, Scorpios strongest line of attack is always in defence, where their fixidity brings enduring patience and determination, and their natural resilience makes them seem practically impassable. Consider the role of scorpion gods in ancient symbolism and myth; invariably their function is to act as guardians, custodians and protectors; oblivious to external distraction but ferocious in the cruel retribution unleashed on those who break their sentinel.
When Scorpios do engage in conflict their method of operation is perfectly reflected by the terrestrial creature that defines their celestial motif – all scorpions are venomous and all are predators, but they never actively hunt or chase down their prey; instead they patiently sit and wait, months if necessary, proceeding to ambush only when their quarry is close enough to stand little chance of escape. In business and battle Scorpios make inestimable adversaries, particularly when they take up positions where they can calculate, control and hold back a concerted effort until its execution will realise maximum impact. Consequently Scorpios excel at military leadership, board room politics and court room disputes; Second World War leaders Patton, Montgomery and Rommel were all Scorpios, locked together in a game of cool, calculated planning geared towards maximum damage for minimum effort. No doubt the capacity to hold the nerve and strike without hesitation has served Scorpio Bill Gates equally well in the battle ground of the business world.
The ability to penetrate superficial gloss is a trait that Scorpio shares with Virgo, a sign to which it is tied in sympathy, albeit often with the inequitable viewpoint of Scorpio being the perpetrator of worldly-wise experience, and Virgo, the victim of purity born from naivety. Their affiliation is revealed in the similarities of their glyphs which represent the intestines and illustrate that both signs are highly sensitive to gut-reaction. Impetus derived from the guts rather than the brain is emotive and instinctive, ‘gut instinct’ being a potent motivator in the decision-making processes and emotional responses of both these signs. Yet with Virgo the glyph is closed off and recedes into itself, symbolising barrenness, an urge to be self-contained, but revealing a need to receive and allow itself to be drawn out in order to gain completeness. With Scorpio the glyph is outwardly extended, blatantly phallic, depicting an energy that is not so easily constrained; its impulse is to penetrate, invade, and when it does so its manner is unswerving and focussed.
Both of these are feminine signs, so neither is comfortable with an easy, expressive discharge of internal energy; and since Scorpio is of the phlegmatic temperament it is even more driven towards internalisation. In order to penetrate it must first draw towards it: Scorpio doesn’t walk into your territory, it doesn’t flirt and cajole, it merely let’s its own energy attract, and when penetrating your secrets it does so having lured you to a place where resistance is low. Like Virgo, Scorpio has an analytical gift: it probes the depths, breaks apart, identifies the dross and eliminates the wasteful or insincere. But whereas Virgo draws upon a Mercurial process of analysis and integration, Scorpio relies purely on its gut-reaction, its lack of quick mental assessment more than adequately compensated by heightened emotional/psychic sensitivity and a compulsive fixation upon a problem until its actual dimensions are finally exposed.
Like all water signs, Scorpio finds a natural habitat in the world of feelings and instincts. Its emotional reservoir is incredibly strong since its fixed nature is resistant to easy movement, allowing the watery element to seep into rarely accessed depths that are not easily stirred, processed or purified. Within the practical application of using astrological symbolism to identify locations, the ‘fixed element of water’ is used to represent long-accumulated sediment, water trapped by the coldness of ice or the heaviness of mud. It is moved only by great effort and force, signifying torrents, flooded land and destructive mud-slides. In drawing an analogy between water and the realm of human emotions, we can see why this sign has a natural attachment to depth-psychology: Scorpio has a very rich and fertile insight into the underbelly of life, and even in the definition of the sign as ‘autumnal’ we are reminded that the emphasis is taken away from that which exposes itself on the surface, to the need to withdraw back to the fundamental root. Here destruction and creativity meet together, causing a tremendous alchemical reaction between attraction and repulsion, a transmutative force which deserves the highest respect since a negative or uncontrolled release is capable of destruction, just as a positive, controlled discharge is imbibed with the power to sweep away all boundaries of resistance.
The Egyptians, who accorded great honour to scorpions and beetles, recognised the spiritual alliance between the creatures that dwelt beneath the earth and the magical, alchemical processes of life, death and regeneration. The most blessed state was to be born in a ‘rich compost’ of power, and the black, fertile mud of the Nile delta was their Prima Materia, the bubbling melting pot of creativity where decomposing elements underwent an attractive reaction that allowed the emergence of new life. Their word for this black, muddy earth was Kemit, adopted as khemia by the Greeks, and eventually forming the basis of the word alchemy which has dropped its spiritual dimension – but not its power to transmute and create – in the modern word chemistry. Whilst all the water signs are known for their fertile potential, it is with dark, still, muddy Scorpio that we encounter the truly powerful creative potential.
Similar analogies are revealed through the relationships between the signs of the zodiac and the parts of the body they rule. These are never ‘ad hoc’ connections, and allow us another route to explore the deeper motive of each sign. Scorpio governs the groin area: the ‘private parts’ which contain the reproductive and excretory organs. Reproduction expresses the drive towards continuance, ‘seed’ being symbolic of latent life force and reserves of power as yet unexploited. Excretion demonstrates the need to eliminate that which has served its purpose; thus in the bodily processes of procreation and elimination we see the metaphysical reflection of the Scorpionic dance through attraction, creation, destruction and regeneration.
For Scorpios who lack conscious direction this can seem an exhaustive ongoing process, a life full of highs and lows, passion and pain, with the zenith and nadir of experience expanding with each successive turn. There is no doubt that this full exposure to experience involves pain, suffering, hardship, distress and agonised emotions. The ‘private parts’ relate symbolically to the depths of the hidden, unlit realms; where the raw, gritty and disquieting elements of all that is unpleasant and socially unacceptable take place. Most Scorpios have encountered the harsher realities of the world at some level or another, and being fixed in disposition they retain their experiences – even the most in-depth, transpersonal counselling techniques can only help to bring acceptance and understanding, they do not erase the memories. Through Scorpio we are drawn to confronting and conquering such demons, a journey requiring an honest acceptance of how we contribute towards, as well as suffer from, the issues that underlie corrupted patterns of behaviour. It has been said that no one has a true understanding of any brutal, distressing event until they have experienced it in full. Who can claim to understand or even try to break any pattern of abuse except those that have acknowledged their part as both abuser and abused, and then, having risen outside of the circle, brought the wisdom of experience to the needs of those still suffering within it? Scorpios that are in or have worked through this cycle naturally find it hard to be lightly chatty about it. Any attempt to skirt around issues, whatever form they take, smacks of insincerity and avoidance, and Scorpios have seen too much, and worked too hard to deal honestly with the darker sides of reality, to engage in a world of pretence. Even in their sarcastic sense of humour Scorpios have a way of reminding us that we may laugh at life, but we should never be too flippant about it.
If, as the Egyptians thought, scorpions represent initiation into the sacred mysteries, we can consider the sign’s other related creature, the eagle, as a higher expression of Scorpio power. Many ancient astrologers, including Ibn Ezra, recognised eagle symbolism as valid to this sign, since the biblical prophet Ezekiel described a vision, believed to be drawn from Babylonian astrology and representative of the ‘fixed cross of matter’:
As for the likeness of their faces, they four had the face of a man [Aquarius], and the face of a lion [Leo], on the right side: and they four had the face of an ox [Taurus] on the left side; they four also had the face of an eagle [Scorpio]. (Ezekiel 1 verse 10).
Saint John’s book of the Apocalypse (Revelation 4, v7) also alludes to the vision, of which Fred Gettings, in The Secret Zodiac, writes:
The eagle of St John is the eagle of Scorpio, which sign (alone of all the twelve) has two images, the eagle the symbol of the redeemed and spiritualized Scorpionic nature, the scorpion its fallen, unredeemed and earth-bound nature. [2]
Transcendence from the crawling scorpion to the soaring eagle, still predatory, still conveying the essence of patience and penetration, but capable of flight and height, brings together the theme of destruction and renewal as a story of evolution. The argument that the constellation Aquila the Eagle took its name from the time it coincided with the summer solstice – the bird of greatest elevation assuming the symbolism of the summit of the Sun – supports the view that in this respect the eagle is representing the ‘Scorpionic myth’ of the phoenix, which self-immolates after turning its nest into a funeral pyre and, (according to the Roman historian Pliny’s report), rises again, initially as a small worm that grows from the bones and marrow of the carcass. [3] All Scorpios feel themselves to be on this spiritual quest of transformation and it should be remembered that their depth of mind is as equally attracted to higher philosophy as it is to depth psychology.
Being committed to such a purposeful journey, Scorpios may well seem too intense to many, immensely secretive regarding private matters, unforgiving, jealous and possessive of their territory, and instinctively hostile to those who stand in their way. Their emotions are strong and passionate, but they run deep and are not easily expressed. Their relationships are seldom relaxed and easy-going, as sexual attraction is often the means through which they explore their own emotional power and transformational journey. Once passion is lacking they are capable of an almost cold-heated detachment and reserve which can leave an acute sense of abandonment in the partner. Ultimately they follow their own path, and yet they remain intensely loyal to those to whom they give their allegiance, take their responsibilities seriously and respond positively to trust that is sincerely invested in them. Their personal magnetism draws many towards them and if they chose to take up a position of leadership their motivating will bears strong influence upon others and their persistence usually guarantees success. But they will often shy away from positions that involve long periods of being the centre of attention – bright light is stark and inhospitable to them. Although they enjoy pulling the strings of influence, they prefer to do so ‘behind the scenes’ or in such a way that ensures their personal privacy is preserved. Scorpios have subtle, crafty fingers but never forget that they are attached to an iron first of power. People tend to love them or hate them; either way Scorpios are always a force to be reckoned with.
Ok Pluto Puppy, in true Scorpionic fashion you nailed this one. The most interesting is the Virgo/Scorpio paradox. I am a Taurus and the only men that i’ve ever fallen for have been Scorpios and Virgos. This of course says a lot about me, the fact that I respond highly to integrity, and intensity. The man for me has to match my passion. A Virgo may not be as demonstrative, but their words are never false and in the bedroom they will let you fall into a safe and concrete erotically virtuous bed. Now a scorpio with his masks and whips and mouth holes will test you, wring you and you better do the same to him.
I appreciate Scorpios. I find that the unevolved ones are weak in character, make hasty judgments and have a holier than thou stance about them, they flee into themselves and latch on to someone who is impressed enough, this way they begin their destructive cycle begins.
The evolved ones are more willing to put themselves in the line of fire, they’ve been purified by the burn and will teach you how they survived. They’ve let go of their need for revenge, they’ve accepted their limitations and if you will fault them for anything perhaps it’s their too easy ability to let things finally go.
A Scorpio and a Taurus is the the wuthering height of a great romance, down to the socks of an affair. A scorpio will stare at you during lovemaking, and out. His mind is assessing everything about you. Are you worthy of his obsession? You better be staring back and asking the same. That is the only way it will ever work.
“I appreciate Scorpios. I find that the unevolved ones are weak in character, make hasty judgments and have a holier than thou stance about them, they flee into themselves and latch on to someone who is impressed enough, this way they begin their destructive cycle begins.
The evolved ones are more willing to put themselves in the line of fire, they’ve been purified by the burn and will teach you how they survived. They’ve let go of their need for revenge, they’ve accepted their limitations and if you will fault them for anything perhaps it’s their too easy ability to let things finally go.”
bealacey…
… you’re original and sincere… I couldn’t have said this any better.
Thank you.
“That’s the way it is. No light flirtation, or casual affair. It will be frigid disinterest, total disaster – or a devotion which will last a lifetime, and beyond that, past forever. All – or nothing at all. The bible will come in handy either way.” – Linda Goodman Love Signs
Thank youuu Pluto Pup!
I have taken a few shot gun blasts from a group of people over the years… and I’m still standing.
Note, any hidden enemies stay quiet and watchful. That silence is actually more fear suppressed and not understood. When I face my critics, I face my fears, and in doing so conquer them.
People who (unconciously) focus on pulling others down to their level are the ones you have to watch… closely.
For it comes back to the psychic-instinctual knowing of anothers True Motivations… with only, if any… a few words said.
So if one is not fully conscious of deceit, one cannot laser-beam it out of the water.
In my life socially, there is so much ‘going on’ underneath the surface of every moment… I feel blessed to be able to see it and feel it.
If I were born a plodding-stable Earth nature, or a flighty-curious Air nature… I would do well to observe the “Quiet… Smug” Scorpionic agenda… who monitor everyone else, everything else in their environment TO MAINTAIN CONTROL of that environment… yet are to oppressed to reveal any hint of their sinister agenda.
The Eagle consciousness knows how to Release it’s intensity out into the world… while not diminshing an ounce of power. In fact, he gains power through his character and positive influence.
The crawling Scorpion “thinks” that controlling his environment via stealth tactics is power. He is wrong and he is a fool.
Now, I still am deeply private and discerning… Yet, I am continually learning to Release my intense reality outward, socially… as I perpetually move foward, regardless of social backlash. I find it to be the most Meaningful and Rapid way of learning what I can offer to people individually and in group situations.
I had one time manifested a Very quite personality, shy even… and now I find it a little tricky to Not Speak my Mind… with full, but careful force.
Ahhhh, the blessings of growth and maturity.
Hi Bealacey,
I became curious of these statements…
“For it comes back to the psychic-instinctual knowing of anothers True Motivations… with only, if any… a few words said.”
“Through Scorpio we are drawn to confronting and conquering such demons, a journey requiring an honest acceptance of how we contribute towards, as well as suffer from, the issues that underlie corrupted patterns of behaviour.”
Related to your statement…
“Now a scorpio with his masks and whips and mouth holes will test you, wring you and you better do the same to him.”
It was the word “testing” that called my attention actually. Please explain!
Gatubela
Spookeydoll,
I do not feel that you need a life… or a book…
I do feel truly sorry however, that your scorpio may not be returning the same feelings that you have for him. But, that is how it goes. Since a relationship is for (a minimum of) 2, we would be dealing with a one sided relationship. Since he has been honest with you, that is a good cue to make a very well founded decision based on what you are comfortable with and what you need to be happy in a relationship.
If you are asking for a personal judgement, I would venture to say that there is a degree of imaturity and lack of sensitivity on both sides- therefore, no binding ties for depth of feeling. If someone is interested, they don`t play – even it the relationship lasts a month or a lifetime. No games here on his side – even if his honesty may hurt a bit.
I hope that it goes well for you.
Ladies,
If we focus on the fact that Scorpios are sexual, sexy…manly and darn attractive, great in bed etc., we are completely missing the point. What you will be doing is “mentally” perceiving and interacting with the surface “visible results” of their incredible internal journey (UNKNOWN – intensity) bubbled up into the KNOWN (where you are). Or rather…you can see if the soil is fertile only if the plants are nice and green. Will you interact with the plant (surface)…or the soil (source)?
The rest is …the perfect playground. You are the receivers of his or her “being” and energetic release system obtained through transformative experiences. This can go good or bad for you based upon whether or not they are “evolved” or not. If you can`t interact with anyone on a core level than the relationship may experience some of the problems found in this site. Scorpios broaden the emotional spectrum.
You don`t test (an evolved) Scorpio…they know the outcome before…much before they engage. Fun! Fun!! Fun!!! Actually, an evolved Scorpio won`t bother with the testing part. (Contempt and time for a little …”correction” …just an itty bitty…if they feel like it. NEVER forget the EAGLE EYE VIEW that they have of things) However, if we talk about the merging process, it may seem like a test…if you feel this, you may need to review your motivations and being. There is no such thing as TESTING in TRUTH and HONESTY.
That is the only TRUE way it will LAST and you not feel the emotional trauma that will eventually occur due to Pluto`s effect- first with yourself, always.
If you want it to “WORK” then there will be books for you too. It is always nicer to have a compassionate person though who has faith in humanity and doesn´t insult someone when they are down (for whatever reasons)…Right???
i need help with my scorpio husband,,,he was traveling for a year and a half,,,came home recently,,i found out there was someone else,,i believe online,,,he said he never cheated,,,but now he says he “needs time to work things out” and just let it go…i’m having difficulty doing this,,,he is the complete opposite of the happy outgoing man i love,,,he is sunk somewhere,,all this time he always sent flowers , cards etc….now he says “i do not think i dont love you,,,but just let it go until i work things out”,,,now if we are physical,,,which he says was most of the problem,,,before he touches me he says” just remember this is just sex,,,nothing emotional”,,,i said ,,well for now,,,there is still a ring on my finger, and since you love it,,lets go take some stress of,,,i have to admit his lovemaking is totally different,,,extremely aggressive,,,i feel like he rented me out for an hour,,,then when he is done,,,he wont look at me…
can this be saved anyone?
Susan…it is surely terrible when your marriage is having problems. I can´t answer if your marriage can be saved – no-one can. One can only offer support during this difficult time and encourage you to find your own answers. Either way, you will need to be strong
You know your husband better than anybody…or you should. Trust that more than anything.
Also, make sure that you know yourself and who you are. Any decision you make will be important because you have defined that you want to save your marriage. Right?
It doesn`t matter about the past…you cannot work with that. You have only the present or how he is NOW. He wants time…well, it can go two ways…you give it to him or not. It is not hard. Once you define your truth, emotional responses are streamlined and honesty, truth and maturity sets in. The rest will fall into place…I assure you. Please understand that you may discover things about yourself that you may not have been aware of. These situations have a lot of potential energy…repressed feelings coming from below…Gently accept your truths, and his. Again…I know that it is hard
One word of caution…Scorpios have this reputation of being …well…vengeful…I see this as the ultimate extreme expression of their broad emotional spectrum and their process of healing through destruction / creation. They will cut through any and everything, once they are in battle mode i.e. he feels that he has been deceived. You knew this complicated part of his personality before you married him, so don`t complain now (I know, it’s hard)
For him, he has been honest with you. Have you always been brutally honest with him when you felt “attracted” to someone else or that there were problems in the marriage? I.E. Why did you let him travel? While he was away, did you make him feel that he was truly and deeply missed? Did you convey to him, your deep feelings and love, stretching out the MOMENT of torture due to his absence to its ultimate exquisiteness?
He will go through the “to hell and back” analysis, coupled with his own ego problems and desire to control himself and the situation. Therefore, he will expect honesty from you as well. This means, don’t feel any insecurities about yourself and start being dishonest with him. It’s a weird justice system, but I do assure you, he will know, or he will find out. He is going through a Scorpio thing, but he ain`t sleeping. Keep it very simple, mature and dignified and it should iron itself out. Make him feel that you have deceived him or threaten him in any way, and he will react. This is the best way to assure the most best possible outcome. Hold to your truth with all of your strength. Respect him for his, but also, understand that if he does not respect you, you may complicate things for yourself. Its a woman thing.
For example…Are you comfortable with this “because you like it and let`s release some stress” situation? If you are not comfortable, then …DON`T. There is no rocket science to this one. Either way, if you want to find a “strategy” for saving your marriage, there is a vast difference between having “sex” instead of “making love”. However, there is no right or wrong answer here. Only truth of how it makes you feel. Put love into your heart and tell him how you feel. Manipulate him in any way, and he will not make a decision. He will wait for yours. I won`t go into Quantum relationship physics here…most people are not interested in working with energy when they are suffering. This comes only after one has defined their personality.
This is like an earthquake…the earth moves and you will feel and go through all of its vibrations, before you settle in upon who you really are and what your marriage really is…So, buckle up your emotional seatbelt.
i thank you for your insight,,it has helped tremendously,,,i have let him down while he was away,,he had a job he wanted making lots of money to pay off all our bills,,and we accomplished that…yes, I love this man dearly,,and i will not continue to focus on the past,,i am thankful he has told me..he slept in our bed for the first three nights he was home,,then started pulling away again,,when i came downstairs one night,,he just kept saying he begged me to come down,,and yes,,i did not respond to this like i should have,,he was always concerned about the house, dog,car etc..i really did not want to listen to it,,,i just wanted to go see him,,,as for making love vs sex,,it was the only way for me at the time to be able to touch him,, and in my heart and soul,,we both needed that,,he has a hard time looking at me afterwards,,but you have made me realize i cannot focus on the past, it is done, and i need to really look inside myself and i can see the damage i have done and am responsible for,,,i will be honest with him,,,the crying is over,,and move on..thank you so much
Susan,
It is common among couples perceiving ‘an illusion’ of love that has been buried under ‘the comforts’ of material security and safety.
In my view, you’ve already maintained the same integrity of your own emotions for him since the day you met. Yet… and sadly, he has not responded with these same virtues.
From what I feel, he has shut down meaningful, personal, intimate, one-on-one bonding-> with you.
His career drives and cold ambition have obsessively taken over his humility, strength and any sense of real personal-power.
While he was away…he may have recognized some painful, difficult or different sides of his own psyche that needed death and re-rebirth. But through my experiences, he has not been brave emotionally to let go of ego-control… and die within. To let go and to change into someone better, higher.
If he’s not making powerful, conscious efforts to be open with you about his deep ambivalence… then this (deceit) tells me… he has ‘compartmentalized’ his inner-self farther away from you. Meaning, he is functioning from a purely ego-centric self at the world… and in so doing, he is not looking into your eyes from a stable, deep and free-> Soul Center.
Just by reading your post, I believe he has abandoned his own ‘True Soul Depth’ for the ego-gratifaction of material comfort and power… which is also an illusion.
In other words, he has lost his own way (inside)… having the ability to still cherish you in the moment, love you, and be sexually loyal to you with an open heart.
Speaking from an open heart, and in bold-Truth, regardless of his actions… would at least give you the closure about ‘how’ your heart should proceed.
Yet that open honesty (by him) would require immense self-knowledge of ones emotional battle-field, and ones complex psychology in the social and intimate realm of people.
If you know that he’s cheated on you in your gut, then I’d say you should bravely listen that feminine wisdom. Because if you deny life’s painful Truths… you’ll only be setting yourself up for more disillusionment.
In my experience, “Love Making” is Not love… when emotion and soulful intimacy are missing.
To me, that is ‘whore sex’… not love making.
Kind regards,
Pluto.
” … i feel like he rented me out for an hour… then when he is done… he wont look at me… ”
Susan, that behavior to me is not healthy.
In my world, if I don’t look at my lover square in the eyes before, during and after sex…
… I am in Deep Guilt… of Something.
wow. the power of transformation.
hello people.
there has been some pretty powerful energies around in the stars lately. grand crosses and such.
ive been laying low. delving etc having some big realisations and getting creative.
thankyou so much for that jewel that you posted pluto puppy( i think at 439) that was amazing to read and yes very insightful and helpful.
Hi Susan,
Yes, now that you have decided on your truth, and to keep it very simple and uncomplicated, (i.e. not create any means of him to “justify” his aggressive behavior to you) and you can emotionally “control” yourself, to start off with, you can start using this as a mirror to detect the truthes in your marriage that are now compatible with yours. This is the hard part, and it is the reason why you have to be strong.
For example, would you, after admitting that you had “cheated”, act in the same way he is acting? Or rather, use and abuse your husband with “rough sex” and demean him, even though you know that he had been faithful? Nope? What would it mean to you, if you acted the way he is acting? P. Puppy can say it above, but do you really “FEEL” the weight of what this implies? It is one thing to “cheat”, and be quiet…another thing to be honest and be truly sorry for it, and another thing completely to “cheat”, say something about it, not be REALLY sorry for it, and then turn your wife into an object.
If you have decided to “forgive”, then you must understand that you require the conditions in order to do so. You can forgive and end the marriage, or forgive and try to work it out. If you want to work it out, you require that he does too. If you do not have these conditions, how will you find him i.e. his love for you?
So…he needs time…but for what? You have a responsibility to yourself AND to the marriage – IT IS almost a separate entity… as well to make sure that it is not “contaminated” by bad behavior (unsoulful connection). (The marriage here would be defined as your “soulful connection”. )
The truth (yours and his) WILL, come out if it is done this way….if not adding ANYMORE corruptive behavior to the pot.
I know…it`s hard.
Gatubela
i thank you all for your insight and support,,,my friend has been doing some reiki on me for a while,,,and she has also mentioned the mixed up energies that are around.
i had a long talk with my husband,,he still felt i had abandoned him,,,he asked me three times to leave my job and come see him, i do not recall it this way,,for he was always concerned about money and i feel his ego has been damaged greatly by the fact ,,and i will be totally honest, that he is 56 and having some erectile dysfunction …it is at the core of his thoughts all the time,,i have told him over and over like my dr said,,,there is a multi million dollar industry for that now,,,but his pride or whatever has been holding him back,,,he admitted to me he never cheated,,theoretically,,he has a friend who listened to him.
i told him this morning ,,i am sorry for my actions,,i wanted to sell this house ,,we did for 3 years,,but he procrastinated about it,,,i said we have reached a point in our lives to sell it,,move on,,and resume the marriage we both wanted..
i then told him how i agreed to give him time and i will,,but i cannot keep this strung out,,because it is affecting my health,,i have an ulcer,,,and if he feels i am to blame,,just call your attorney ,,and file for the divorce. he found out i am going to see a marriage councilor friday,,and he became very withdrawn,,i told him i am not doing anything with the house,,filing papers, etc. because in my heart i do love you and i believe we can save this..he then admitted he made a mistake…and as for the physical aspect,,yes that has changed also,,because in my heart i can see the person being affected by it most is him..
i told him it is in his hands,,i do not expect anything more,,,i can take care of myself,,but also,,i told him like the song goes,,,when you find you,,,come back to me,, and i will be here for you,, but if not,,then i am happy for this life i had with you and i plan no remorse,,you just need to look into yourself and see what you really want for us.
Hi Susan,
Lovely…
Yet I do beleive that you feel a certain “heaviness” in your heart with regards to this situation.
I guess I am feeling the years you have had together and the life that you have made. It is like you are waiting for him “…i.e. resume the marriage that we both wanted…”
Susan, he may be affected by his erectile dysfunction and he may need time to go through this. Are you able to see what has him so affected? I know that most males will be stating the obvious and thinking I am silly for asking this, but I feel that it is important that you understand his issue from HIS point of view. Or rather…I don`t know how my state of being would be if I had a masectomy…for example. I hope that my partner will not be affected and be attracted to me just the same. If your relationship was based on “obtaining satisfaction i.e. orgasm…or was it based on intimacy and love (orgasm NOT the point, nor the goal, nor the focus) Can you connect with him (probably not if he is a Scorpio, he will not be in the mood for talking) based on your love for him and not only wait for him, but support him? Again, it always returns to love and acceptance – he has to love and accept himself, his processes and his body.
Another thing…why did he need someone to talk to? Nothing wrong with this…but you should know “WHY”. And there should be honesty. What did they talk about? Anything you can do to support him there as well?
Again, these are lessons …and lesions… to be learnt from before “resuming your marriage”.
Gatubela
our relationship was very much intimacy,,he loved being with me and was always pleasing me. i think now that i have my estrogen level back up to par,,,we could or will be very compatible physically,,he has told me that i am back to the person he married,,,i will let him work through this ,,he had to go through a circumcision about 6 months ago since this was never done,,i think we both thought this would help with the problem,,he was always talking about it on the phone,,i mentioned things will always be very good,,he said he just wanted things back to normal for him,,i supported him the best way i could,,,he had sent me a card ,,very loving,,saying that by my side is where he always wanted to be…i have it by my computer downstairs,,after all this happened,,i put it aside,,i could not understand him sending this card which he loved,,and then thinking of a possible divorce…i looked up today ,,it was gone,,he told me i had removed it,,and he saved it for himself,,i told him today i wanted it back,,and he smiled and went and got it…i hugged him,,he did not really hug me back.. my husband loves to please me before all this,,physically and emotionally,,but i feel that my speaking out yesterday gave him a bit of a wake up,,i.e. if you want a divorce just go file it,,he has been tip-toeing around me ever since,,but until he feels recovery from the neglect which he may never ,,i am not going to sit around and mope anymore about it..i also know there is something pressing going on regarding this subpoena and his job,,i will give him the time to get through this,,he leaves the 25th for Tn. where it happened and will be back in 3 days,,he showed me the copy of the subpoena to prove to me that was where he was going,,but he is still stuck in the ‘i gave you three strikes and now its out’ mode,,he may never forgive,,i know he will never forget
i am a very spiritual person,,he started quoting a phrase from the bible ,,which he has never done in all our years together,,about giving people 3 chances,,etc..i said,,well,,maybe you should fast forward to “forgiveness”,,for that is certainly mentioned also
he is a scorpio,,that is the bottom line
Hi Susan,
When you feel your truth…rising from the heart centre, it will not matter if he is a scorpio or not. The heart centre is gentle and guiding, and as long as you feel it, it will gently and firmly take you to where you are supposed to be. Include him in your thoughts, and it will guide you to do the same with him.
FEEL your husband – His feelings of abandonment may be stemming from a greater issue – I am guessing here, but it could also be related to you leaving him due to his physical problems and all the “male” issues associated with his sexuality – definition of self with in the marriage as always wanting to satisfy you (and now he may not be able to?). Or rather, it would not matter if there is a multi-million industry or not, it is HIM – soul to soul love – that is the “center of your universe”.
If you feel this way about him, have you clearly told him? He may need to FEEL that truth from you as well.
If this marriage ends, then based on what I sense about you, I feel that it should end in gentleness, acceptance and love, because I believe that your husband has been a good man to you – even though he has had his “strong character / ego flaws”. Him being concerned about the house…nice.
Women have incredible strength in finding the love energy and redirecting it. Sometimes, your man needs to see this as well. Do this to the best of your ability. If there is nothing to be done, your health – mental and physical, will be intact.
Gatubela
he told me this morning it is over,,,i went to get my hair done ,,he called me when i was driving over there and accused me of lying and saying i was really headed to an atty…he found a paper of mine by the computer with a mans name on it,,,i told him i wrote this atty name down because i was frightened,, he said he had been working to settle this in a nice manner,,,but also told me he could get real ugly with me and i would not get anything,,,i am in tx. things will get split 50/50,,,he told me he has been trying to get me to listen to him,,,i told him i am in love with you,,i do not want this to end,,,but if that is what you choose,,go file the papers…he said he cannot because he has no place to go,,,i do not know what i am missing,,,he says i never pay attention to him,,etc,,,right now i am going to try and look forward because whatever i have done,,,he will not forgive me
he also kept saying that i was not the only one getting hurt by this,,,and its not that he did not love me,,,he just wants his own space…since he travels a lot he said he would be gone in a couple weeks and i could be alone again,,,i said that is what i dont want,,,he felt his first wife did not love him,,and he told me today he would not make that mistake again..
thank you all
Susan,
Hold on to your truth… the answers will come out and the truth of the situation will be seen. Allow him to go through all possible range of emotions, without adding more negativity. Please be careful about the “when- he -feels -deceived – hypersensitized -radar -shotgun” response. Don`t listen to the words he says as they are, at the moment, incoherant. FEEL him.
Stabilize the energies though connection with your heart centre and see if something can be salvaged peacefully – even if it is friendship.
Again, watch your health through beleiving in yourself and intelligently understanding your options and freedom to act as well as your limitations in the “physical materialistic” side as well as the spiritual, find the peaceful balance if it can be found.
As he continues into his incoherance, it will be his journey. Don`t go there with him, as the whirlpool of emotions and “burning” will also affect you and your health and do not permit the “feedback loop” of emotions during any emotional “breakdown”.
Yes, you are missing something. The volcano is errupting. These processes, indicate that he must face the “truth of something”. He will “evaporate” everything and anything (from heaven to hell…including your feelings for him. Where do they “REALLY” stand? He will find out Susan.
Good thing you are with Reiki.
Gatubela
i thank you again,,i can connect with him deeply,,i want my best friend back…i feel it will take time,but i will wrap my heart around him,,and if it is for the best it will happen,,,he is exhausted from something,,,mentioning that i am not tbe only one to get hurt in this,,,i just wish i could break down that wall surrounding him,,,and with a lot of positive energy i think i can if it is meant to be,,,if it was over a long time ago like he says,,,why did he bother with the cards, flowers etc..i do not understand that,,hopefully i will
Susan,
A relationship – a marriage in your case, is more than just flowers and lovey dovey feel good situations.
The good and the bad – are very wrongly perceived i.e. not respected and handled very badly (no soul connection, no maturity, no love)- the majority of the times due to our socially drilled concepts of what real love is and the fact that we are conditioned to think downwards…(and not feel upwards), in terms of right or wrong, good or bad, understand or misunderstand… As long as you are “thinking” and feeling, you are “off”. Once you feel and have connection to the heart center, you find balance – and all of the goodies that you need in order to see this through (patience, truth, strength, etc.)
The answers to your questions…will not be forthcoming until the person who can answer them has also connected. When that happens, there will be no more questions, only answers.
Gatubela
here is some of the truth,,,he told me when he asked me to quit my job 3 times and i did not that it compromised some of his principles,,whatever that means
Hi Susan,
I know that there is much, much, much more Susan. Stuff that you won`t say on this page. The part of you that you kept quiet.
You know exactly what it means…to him…and to you…if you had…or if you hadn`t. This is a two sided, interactive network of possibilities, in which both sides have different perceptions of what obtaining their desires means.
What would it have meant for him, if you had quit your job? What would it have meant for you, if you had quit your job?
Why didn`t you? Go deeper into this…you will start to get the answer to …some of …your questions. Not everything was healed in the bedroom.
As I said, you will see what your marriage IS and ISN`T, on both sides.
Gatubela
you are right,,there is much more,,,he yells because i put too many miles on the car,,when i brought up a friends name who was looking at my car and wanted to know the value,,he starts screaming about getting attorney advice again,,,like i said and you said,, there is much much more and i thank you
there is much more,,,and i am not saying this is anyone’s fault ,,his or mine,,,when my husband wanted me to do something,,,i was not to question it,,,i always was suppossed to “go along with everything he wanted,,,he asked me to quit my job,,i chose not to for my own beliefs,,,he wanted to control when i saw my friends and if i had them,,i now see that this was a problem over 9 years ago,,i have always been very independent,,,we are working out settlements now and how things will be split,,yes he is helping me a great deal,,and i told him i will always love him and thanked him for our life together
inside myself,,i do not like being controlled ,,i didnt get married until i was 47,,,i miss being with people ,,going to see my friends when i want, and not having to sneak around to do this,,,there is a lot of hatred still in his life,,,but this relationship was never 50/50,,it was always at least 80/20,,,i cannot love someone so much and still feel obligated to be just “his”,,i never could
Hi Susan,
Well, the feeling I am getting is that your soon to be ex did not want you to socialize with him being away and not in the house -mixed in with him working and worried about the house. It deals with the fact that you were “alone” and he was not there – perhaps tied to a sense of “respect” that he needed.
Hopefully he finds healing for his anger and both of you maintain the peace. Be careful about the “bubbling volcano” Susan. Be honest with him and stay honest with him. He already knows / feels what happened or could have happened when he was away and is reacting strongly to it. This, on top of his own “doo doos”.
you know,,,its funny he mentioned that once,,’at least i know you would not bring anyone to the house”,,,he is jealous of all my male friends at work calling me,,asking how i am,,,and also of my family calling me ,,,he has just got another phone call and walked out,,,took the car and has been gone an hour,,i have to tell myself to let this go,,but my trust is not there
This is why all women are BUNNIES through the eyes of Pluto Puppy.
cute
Hi Susan,
You might have known that I am in South America. Life here has changed me incredibly – I am originally from Canada.
Well – I understand jelousy – and being (highly) protective of what is yours (to love… and not sharing that with anyone because it is none of anybody`s business and I “KNOW” the intentions of other people) and I differentiate it from jelousy and trying to control the person . The intrinsic motivation and the subconscious triggers of the behavior are the key. I would not want to be controlled – but I do listen to protectiveness – or rather, my partner`s intrinsic motivation of maintaining the relationship alive and full of fire…the intense FOCUS of two people on each other.
He is the MAN – I don`t know how it is where you are, but here, it means that the woman is not being “loyal” to her man if other men have been “allowed” to feel that they can call. This is a big “NO-NO”. This behavior would have to be reciprocal, of course – the psychic dance of energies constantly moves toward more and more intimacy, right? This is the point. The rest is “not important” and does not / should not exist.
If this issue were settled in a mature manner, Scorpio would not ask you to quit your job, (not a “real” solution to this problem because it does not deal with “YOU”) and you would not feel controlled …not a “real” way to handle a love relationship since you know why he is acting this way . i.e. your colleagues calling you and him reacting this way is not the REAL issue here.
So it comes down to this…you KNOW how he feels – that is/ was not going to change. Your subsequent actions will speak and have spoken louder than words…to him.
this is deep i almost cannot comprehend it all,why did he never just sit me down and say our marriage is in trouble”,,he says he kept telling me over and over i neglected him,,and my mind still goes back to the night when he said “yes there is someone else”,,someone has gotten inside this mans head ,,i know it ,,i know him better than anyone on this planet,,his need to not sleep in the same bed is for his protection,,he has been trying something for this sexual problem, a type of viagra and it is helping some,,i am encouraging him to believe this because i still love him,,he is now more open and loving again to me, and i feel this problem weighs on a man more than i can comprehend,,but those words said to me i can not get out of my head,,he does not want to be married anymore for a reason,,and i in my heart,,feel this person is behind it,,but i will agree to this divorce if it is better for both of us,,i cannot change his mind,,i am the evil one,,,that is all there is in his mind
“… why did he never just sit me down and say our marriage is in trouble”,,he says he kept telling me over and over i neglected him…”
Because real intimacy requires guts and raw-emotional gravity, for each person to BE open and vulnerable with secrets and insecurities. If you can’t find the cancer… then either of you won’t be able to cut out the cancer.
“… and my mind still goes back to the night when he said “yes there is someone else”,,someone has gotten inside this mans head…”
I don’t want to hurt you here, but I feel I must say it.
Someone has reached his heart and soul. I’m sorry Susan, but if he is nature resembles an inkling of my inner-nature… his issues are not merely ‘cerebral’. They are much deeper and murkier…buried in his heart and emotions and masculinity… and sexuality.
So both of your troubles are not mental. If they were logical misunderstandings, you would not be hearing his need for separation.
In many aspects, his sexual inadequacy has probably devastated him at the core. Persoanlly, I know I wouldn’t be the same man if that had happened to me.
I don’t know how long you’ve been married… but I do know that our nature is very sensual. Consistent touching, holding, kissing, helping, sharing, loving, compassion and sex are all extremely meaningful acts of love. If that fundamental intimacy was missing in your marriage… then it may have been a big ’cause’ for his feelings of abandonment.
Scorpio nature needs nuturance like anybody else.
We may me seem invincible… but deep down we need to know we are loved beyond basic companionship and shared life goals. We are human, not machines.
Life, sex and career success “feels” (not thinks) meaningless without a strong emotional woman by our side… a pillar we can fall back on.
The other woman may have shown him something deeper in himself that he could relate with… I don’t know… you’ll have to be brave, ask and find out.
Best regards.
Hi Susan,
It could come down to the soul connection (his with yours)…and a high sense of dignity. A sense of identity /pride that at the moment is unfathomable to you, but he clearly understands for himself. I am not saying that it is right or wrong – it does not matter.
Sometimes, someone makes life decisions based on their values and they may go beyond or have priority over the relationship. This would be a very subjective call of course. At the moment, he may have a choice to make – and the shedding of ego and transformation may have to occur. Does he want to do it? Maybe not. He has 2 choices – be married or not. He is a big boy – and he really does not need sympathetic behavior. He may appreciate it of course, provided that it is not manipulating and dishonest.
In the case of your soon to be ex, it is very important that you understand why he felt so abandoned. (If you care to find out) Wierd trust issues seem to be present, and he may not understand them completely himself. Feeling abandoned is NOT the real issue here. Lack of clarity of thought and a well developed sense of direction (i.e. intense focus on the marriage) seems to be rappant. If he feels deceived, and your colleagues are a`callin`, he aint gonna sit you down and chit chat about it. He is going to be REAL angry about it. You would have to have solved it “RIGHT THEN AND THERE” – being honest and assuring your focus on the relationship and adapt “corrective and preventive behavior and relax his scorpionic radar, or….. he made an honest mistake in his shotgun behavior and overreacted. If this is so, you still have to do the above, or would have to have been doing the above but circumstances were misunderstood by him. It could be humiliating for him if you don`t. You take him seriously or not (`cause he is NOT joking)
If you don`t completely understand it based on your “knowing him better than anyone on this planet” and can not find the answer, there is very little that can be done. It depends on what you wish to understand, internalize and learn / feel from this experience
I have been reading this thread for a while now during this time i have broken up with my scorpio male many times. Through crazy reasons. He will say i am not talking to you, next day i get 10 texts from him.
Which pretty much reveal his whole thinking process. I cant play his games, so its got to the point now where i just let him get on with it.
I met him, at a low point in my life 5 months ago. It was 10 weeks after my daughter had died (full term pregnacy) my partner left 6 days later, and the last thing i was looking for was a relationship.
So he came into my life as a friend. I had no clue we were going out on dates, as i had no comprehension of that at the time. Although he was surprised at that, thought i knew we were dating.
2 months later we kissed, 3 months later before we had sex. I told him i was too vulnerable for a relationship.
In between that, one time we split he came in and publically ended it in front of everyone i was so shocked. Next day we were not speaking. I was so angry wtih him, at 4am i was writing a really long text telling him how i felt and was asking him never to contact me again. When i heard tapping on my bedroom window (3rd floor of my house). I was stunned when i looked and saw a single magpie tapping its beak on my window looking through the window. I looked stunned. I stopped texting and went to sleep.
In my dream, he was stood in front of me large as life. Smiling as if to say its ok, held out his hand to me, as if to say please trust me.
next morning when i awoke, i was full of love, and sent him a nice text. Just full of love. I thought well it couldnt have been him in my dream as he was out djing at a party…. turns out he went to sleep for 4 hours in a van same time as me. This was on the 6th month anniverary of my daughters death.
The next month was difficult, we fought a lot, and split up so many times. Each time i got stronger and stopped being so vulnerable. The last time we split was a week ago. This was on my daughters 7 month anniverary.
Anyway — the last week has been strange, he has been off and on. Tues night we agreed never to speak again. i was happy with this as it meant i could focus on me.
I went to sleep late that night around 4.45am.. he woke at 6am… i got a flood of long texts from him. he said he had seen me in his dream it was so vivid. I was his wife, we had gone to a church then to a house — where we watched 2 children playing in the garden. One was my daughter who had died, the other was our son… who has not happened yet. He was conviced i was the right woman for him, and has declared undying love for me since.
I have been to scared to meet up with him, although am mean to tonight. I am scared it will be on off again.
I love him, but have been happy without him and his drama. causing me upset.
I dont know what to do. I know he loves me deeply… but i am scared of getting hurt again.
Has anyone experienced anything like this/ We are both spiritual and there is defiately a connection between us but i dont know if this is enough?
Any ideas?? I write this now as i suspect it will change yet again.
The weird part is that now he has had dream same as me, but his was more graphic.
Both times, neither of us planned to see each other again, yet when we woke, we ewre full of love for each other like it had never happened.
Its almost like we CANT split — even if we wanted to. its VERY intense which is cool with me as i am too… but this week has been nice being away from me.
I am tempted to text him to cancel tonight not beacuse i dont love him but because i fear pain. its too much 😦
Gatebula has helped me so much with all this,,i have looked back,,my husband is very much like the above,,,we were married 3 years before he would even put me on his checking account,,,he promised to go on a vacation with me,,,it has been almost 10 years and that never happened,,,my soon to be ex husband can never just sit and “talk” to me,,about us,,,if he brings things up we can,,but i had just learned to go with the flow,,i did not want the emotions anymore if i tried to express my true feelings,,,he now says my best friend is breaking up the marriage,,,I said “les you were gone so much i had to have some friends to be with”,but that does not register to him,,in this process of divorce i hope to get him to just sit and talk to me,,that may not happen,,i am just going to take care of me for now and move on
hmmmm…magpies… again. How interesting.
Well…I must be honest with you…if you are well with out him…and the emotions, then why are you saying that you “love” him?
So, I will try to answer my thoughts with regards to you…and not with him. Why? Because Scorpios have incredible abilities…and a very active “under-life”. Meaning what you are perceiving on the surface …is just that. If they are proficient, they work under…your…life, and everyone elses. How this is done…well, you either understand what is going on, or you don`t. So, I can not break the “scorpio Code”.
That being said, we must work with you…
…ignore your dreams, and his…ignore the rollar coaster ride of emotions and stop thinking that you can not end this. What are you left with?
If you were not unstable, not “vulnerable”, healthy and complete, how would you be?
Scorpio is not causing “your reactions”. You are causing them, because they are YOUR NATURAL REACTIONS to the grey area…You must be either yes or no. Any “maybe” …and it is playtime. You know…it`s almost biblical…but you must choose your “flexible and dynamic” truth or be tossed around by the wind.
A dream may mean a lot of things…but in order to be a valid reason to “not be able to end it”, you will need more. However, it could be worth investigating…if you want.
Scorpios…at their very best, will always protect and never harm. The values that they uphold is rigid…however, if they transgress it, it will be due to an intense DESIRE. They will AUTO-BURN once they come out of it. It is terrible to see a scorpio down.
Why not just say to him…how you feel…with no emotional tirade. Well, you will not be able to do that, because you have not achieved that state…hence the consistent fighting and on / off status.
Well, he could use a spanking as well, but putting your man “in his place” will not be possible, unless you emotionally feel yours. What is his place? In the ideal relationship, his place is WITH YOU, protecting you…focussed on you…and no one else…anything less…with scorpio…is not good enough. Have you conveyed that to him? RAWLY? DANGEROUSLY? (poor him if he does not get it) No…I did not think so. You have to feel Maya…the emotions…the BRUTAL TRUTH and BEAUTY of it all.
Also, your place…on him, loyal to him, fight the “world” (other men, and anything that makes you loose focus on him…that is)…for him. FEEL…only for him. The rest does not exist.
You need them emotions…so does he. You can`t maintain the energy when the jar (i.e. the relationship) is leaky.
Thanks for your reply Gatubela. Interesting. First of all i do truly understand this man. He might have a lot going on under the surface but so do i. I am very spiritual. Psychic even, but i think he is too. We read each other. In a deepness of connection that i have never felt before.
You are right, yes i had already said to him that he needs to show his loyalty to me. If he was ending it for his love of music, well did he really love me? He is changing. He is promising me the earth. Everything that i want from him. The problem is that i am having a tough time believing him. Which is harsh. Thats to do with what has happenend before.
I spent a week without him. Spent time with my friends. In that time i was happy. Really happy. I am so undecided if we have a future. I used to love him with my heart and soul, but he has said so much, which has broken my heart its difficult to forget and move on.
Thanks for taking the time to reply. Its been useful. I will take the advice, follow what i have been doing. I am loyal to him. I have been. It just sometimes feels so incredibly intense. I want a break from it. When I do, i regain my energy. who knows what the future brings…i expect i will come back, for me right now, he is declaring undying love. That he wants to be with me forever. Wehter that stays consistent only time will tell.
Thank you x
The ingredients to making a nice, hot, yummy relationship…are missing. This is because there is too much “reaction” and not enough “pro-action”. Both sides are riding the relationship wave.
Psychic or not…it does not matter. This ability does not make a person a Good Partner. Other qualities are desired, and would even have priority, over this.
You seem to be more younger than older…but just the same, due to your experiences with your daughter (very sorry for your loss), you NOW should be wiser and more…mature. (I´m just saying)
However, if you feel that you want to see where the boat is sailing before making a final decision, it is a good idea to gently and compassionately understand yourself – and those values that you are talking about, make sure that they are YOURS and based on being VERY HONEST with yourself and seeing him for WHO he REALLY is.
Ah well its all over again. i got sick, very sick, had to call paramedics. Temperature of 40, am still sick. He came took care of me, then went shopping bought me food and flowers. Then flipped for no reason at all. Said the most cruel, nasty spiteful things. So its all finally over. 5 months of hell.
The sex wasnt great either.
i seem to be more younger than older???
Umm no? I am 42 now, i have raised 2 daughters who are 21 and 23. I have worked with homeless people for 22 years. Have a degree, and most of what i have experienced in life… i have then worked with.
Who he really is? Actually he is a total arse. Who really didnt deserve my time. Anyone who abuses someone who is sick (I ended up in hospital on an IV drip as my temperature was 39.8).. he chose that time to be completely abusive. There is no understanding of that. its unacceptable behaviour.
Hi Maya,
Your age is how you feel – do you feel older or younger? I believe that for a while, you felt “more younger than older”. OK – not like a spring chicken…eager beaver…etc.
It would be good to understand what about yourself chose this relationship – however brief, in the first place. I do mean this most compassionately.
The reason being that even tiny wounds have to be healed – and him breaking up with you publically did not affect you in the same way as this did. Why not?
Understanding this would help you and keep your energies flowing instead of stagnating. Keep yourself open to new experiences, aware of what you want and what you do not want, and…don`t loose your capacity to love.
Sex is exactly what the word says, and not much else. “Great” sex…well, what is that?
If we only knew “TRULY” the energy involved – we would never want to have “great sex” again.
blah blah ablha bblah balh blah blah
Hi “umm”,
I have known all along – but thanks for confirming. Thanks – learnt a lot!
Have a nice day.
For what it is worth, I am sorry.
.
Yes –
heeheehee
I will wait for unified field.
Bye
……………………….
alright. the best for you.
So my Scorpio story is a bit unusual.*****
I am a Cancer in a r-ship w a scorpio man who is married to a pisces woman. But I was his girlfriend for a year before they met. He met her after we had been very much a couple for 9 months. 3 months later we had to give up our r-ship because of circumstances beyond our control. She fell in love with him and they married 14 months later.
BUT he never had told me about her and meanwhile we emailed periodically for a yr n 1/2 proclaiming love for eachother and altho I was now able and wanting to be with him he wouldn’t make any effort to be with me till I finally got hip to the fact that he must be with someone and called him on it at which he replied that he just got married.
I then told him that I wanted no communication with him. But then 4 months went by and he emailed me. I emailed back and said to respect my wishes not to be contacted but then broke down and replied as a friend. By now 3 yrs of knowing eachother had passed. BIG MISTAKE!
Yep you guessed it! We are ‘in love’ in a sexual emotional r-ship and his wife knows and turns the other way. We all have been open about everything from the beginning. He loves and is devoted to her. But it seems his passion lies with me.
all my friends think I am mistreating myself and her for loving him and being in this with him. But I feel magic with him.
We are in our early 50’s and she is not quite 40. He cries with me and to me and his Gemini moon and my gemini rising are pure exilleration together. We feed off eachother while our watery sun signs merge and entwine as tho we are from the same river. Its just a deeply sweet and loving passionate r-ship.
YET I am deeply pained because he is so loyal and I never sense that he wants to leave his soft, flexible, giving Piscean wife.
She accomodates his every desire and has given what she can’t afford to give of herself and then some in order to have and to keep this man. But their’s is a very co-dependant r-ship and she brings to surface his very dark Scorpian nature that is thrilled to get to live out its taboo’s and deep sexual desires. He has all he wants and is honest to us both…living with her. I see him once a month or so but we communicate every day via email and call frequently. Our communication is odd in that it is “HOT” when we see eachother and sometimes so amazingly romantic via email or phone but then lots of periods of just regular. Its soooo intermitten.
I JUST DON”T KNOW!
It feels like he will just go on doing this with me for forever..as long as I will put up with status quo!
He tells me he married her because essentially she and her children needed to be taken care of and he had the means to do it and she has told me she felt this is why he was with her.
So now what!!!! I want to live my life out with this man. Do I wait? He has told me he is in love with me more than once.
But is Scorpio’s LOYALTY such that he will never hurt her and leave her and go on hurting me as he knows this is difficult for me. HELP!!!!! PLEASE!!!!!
Hi there
i had to reply and tell you a little bit about what i have uncovered about the scorpio man i was having an online relationship with. I totally understand where your coming from. I have had just over a year of undying love and devotion from a guy who i have never met and is married in real life. The past year he has talked of meeting (but never did) how he loves me, can;t live without me, afraid of losing me..no matter how much this hurts us both, we must be strong so we can be together etc, i am the first and last one that he loved, soulmates…the list goes on. One day my gut told me to do some checking (which i should have done from the start) only to uncover women he was talking to declaring the same lines, underground fetish scenes etc that he was signed up to and basically just having the run of the mill egotistical lifestyle at the total devastation of myself and many many other women from a period that i have now found out spanned over 7 years. So in all honesty, the honest and truthful guy i fell in love with, was not the same guy n the end. This one was deceitful, a complete cheat and liar, along with his callous way of blaming myself for finding all this out. Along with him going from how he loved me a week before to the moment of finding out telling me i was young and beautiful and i should live my life and not wait for him.
so it all got nasty, it all became a complete battle of wills and to top it all off ended in me saying that i was going to tell his wife (which i firmly believe already knows about his antics, if he is actually married)
So the Scorpio guy gets his cake and eats it, while the women he leaves totally burnt out have broken hearts and are unable to form trust in anyone else again.
I don’t know what the connection is with them, this one i can only describe as totally unevolved because he seems to have no feelings for other and these casual liasons seem to suit him but he cannot turn off his blinkers. I have spent weeks and weeks finding out this information about him because i have to in some way, try to work out whether the whole of our wonderful converstaion and connection could have been a lie!! I really dont have the answers, its just without the physical situation like yours, its seems a similar pattern that emerges here amongst these men
Their secretiveness is for a reason to hide a lot of themselves and their dark fantasies, i also believe they get bored with one woman
secondly do not believe their honesty, if you can recall which i can, i never get a yes or no answer to a question, they usually avert or disappear so they dont have to lie!!! They believe that not saying isn’t lying, it is and i completely loathe liars..hence my over reaction in this case.
You will know when you tell him you are ditching him for another man, he will either do something about it or dangle that ever lingering carrot he has placed in front of you for all these years.
The best medicine is to not respond to his whims. I have decided to hang up my boxing gloves for a while, it was not doing me any favours and i just got blamed for all the things that were unfolding before my eyes about him and his past. I also must add that i believe at one point he was actually playing a cruel game on me too as revenge. I believe that he was actually lining up a lot of the things i was finding out in order to make me pay and suffer for what i had supoosedly done wrong…
A cruel cruel man with a cruel cruel mind…please try and find the strength to break free. If his wife is a pisces like i am a moon, she stays for emotional support so i suppose the deceit isnt that important (how dysfunctional!!)
He is the rule out there in cyber-social-land, and definitely Not the exception Leonine. Nothing unusual in that.
Do ask yourself. Why in high heavens are you believing in empty words online (of all places) Especially while you have Never Met the guy face to face??
His needy promises/motivations spilling “I love you” and what not… should be a dead giveaway for a @#$%^* = PHONIE.
Here’s a contrast of Truths for you to deeply understand:
Leo nature Trusts Everyone = Light = Sun, your Ruler.
Scorpio nature Trusts No-One = Darkness and Hidden Powers = Pluto & Mars, his Rulers.
Yes, he’s dimly evolved, and only looking to bed and conquer any NAIVE girl or woman who accepts his blithering cries of love.
Wise Up Leonine. The experience in that is attempting to Teach you. This world (people) are cruel, lying and deceitful distortions of their illusions.
Online, is not the place to get close and warm with anyone.
That experience must awaken you to ‘stop idealizing’ what love is and look inward to find peace and not constantly project that seeking outward.
Love is beyond words. Yet if one does not understand a persons emotional/psychological behavior, deeper meaning and their deeper hidden motivations… one will crucify their ego-self on the proverbial cross.
I could go on and on about visions of darkness and what it really is… but that is best left alone for people to find out for themselves in the REAL world.
peace.
I REALLY have wondered how this Scorpian man can have a relationship with 2 women at the same time and try to keep us both happy and not go crazy.
What will he do when he senses I am loosing my will to stay in it? Will he let me go? I know I will only be able to do this for so long and then I will want out and will meet someone who I will want to partner with. I told my Scopio guy that I don’t want to be alone that I too want a full r-ship. He didn’t say anything.
Will he finally want to be with me in a complete way when he is threatened with completely loosing me???
Hi Moon,
It seems that your dilema is based on what he will decide…and he has not decided yet? Well, it can go either way at the moment, depending on the quality of his choices.
The other choice that you mention is yours -between the will to stay in this relationship based on … a man who “seems” to say that you are his passion, or to end the relationship and look for someone else.
You don`t mention the depth of your feeling for him. But I will venture to say that if you felt “LOVE”, and not “PASSION”, you would have your answer quite quickly. LOVE first, passion later.
As you can see, it seems that his “patient” wife understands that a man who feels DUTY towards her and stays in the marriage, and allowing him to be himself (scorpionic taboos and sexuality) with her – she is taking the same chances as you are. (Honestly, she is going for much higher stakes, but we will not get into that.)
A man who feels passion only – well it is only a question of time before these energies “fizzle” out. There is no foundation to sustain them. You have already seen that – with his silence when you told him that you wanted a full relationship with him.
He is a married man – (although sadly, these days, a divorce is always an option). From your comments, he married out of “duty”? It is irrelevant – he is married. He will have to live with his choices. So will you.
So, he can not loose what was not TRULY his to begin with. He knows this. The bond between you and him is “passion” based on your “will to stay in it” (not based on love). And the bond between him and his wife is “duty” based on her love for him.
I hope that you improve the quality of your choices and find that special someone. He is out there. When you find him, make sure that you can love eachother first.
i agree with this. They are able to seperate love and sex. I know because this guy had two accounts, one for offering love, devotion and romanticism and another where he could be the Master in fetish terms and have as many slaves as humanly possible to worship him and basically boost his esteem. So 100% agree. They seperate and they do!!! You see i felt i was the love part offering the passion etc, and then as soon as i find out he moves on to the next with no remorse, and not a care for your feelings. Also i found that he would alternate between the two quite regularly on a daily basis just because i suppose his attention span was waning and boredom was setting in from either the love part or the sex bit
Hi Moon –
I just wanted to add that passion is one of the most beautiful and powerful feelings that someone can feel / be. But when love is present, it lasts and grows even more and endures all trials that life brings.
So, what I am going to say may sound strange, but we all should be “pasionate” about ourselves. Applying it to ourselves – well, you can see how unstable it is…most of us simply don`t have it. Nobody can maintain it unless you “love” yourself first. Otherwise, it is very controlling and akin to “satisfying” desires. That is of course, alright too.
Not everybody is meant for sainthood!!!
The word “will” in your comments is interesting – Usually people “will” something to happen. You can have “self will” – control yourself. You can be controlled by someone else`s “will”. Or you can control others by your “will”. Or…you can surrender it all to a higher spiritual will.
Well…these were just thoughts that came up during the day.
Hi Moon –
I am having a nice cup of Hazelnut coffee …and your situation still intrigues me.
Moon – reflecting more on the Quality of your choices…
The ultimatum that you have given your (not so yours) scorpio could be viewed as extremely selfish. Succinctly put – you have asked a man to betray himself (marriage vows) and leave his wife and her children – who are by the way – defenceless. If he is capable of doing this to them, then he is capable of doing the same thing to you – once you are no longer his passion and the rapport is lost. His marriage vows mean nothing to him. The same goes for you.
Your will to stay in this relationship is failing under the heavy weight of his deception and yours.
The ULTIMATE goal in any relationship, for me, is to let the person that I love be who they TRULY are. This is more important than passionate satisfaction.
Actually it is more important than the relationship itself.
Although scorpios seem to be famous for their passion, to view a person under this light,in the absence of love, for me, is extremely disrespectful and hurtful. Why objectify a person??? Keeping people close to my heart has has caused me endless suffering. But I can not bring myself to exert any “controlling” and deceiving emotions for any long periods of time. A person`s most sacred responsibility is to be / find their true selves. For me, it is forbidden to interfere. I understand that not everybody agrees.
Under your passions lies a more deeper TRUTH. You owe it to yourself to find it / be it.
I really wish the best for you.
Oh and as a last thought…
Don´t forget to always put yourself in the position of love in your thoughts and daily living(and no other feeling) while you go further down…past your passions and emotions. There is no right or wrong…there is only love or …no love. This becomes more and more profound the closer you get – so when you feel this, you know that you are close. (zero ego) Then from this point, construct your life again.
Expect…big ouchie… as everyone disrespects you, insults you and tells you how wrong – crazy – stupid – you are.
We know who the real meanies are, right?
sounds like a general descritpion but i belvie it leaves things out. If it means anything im scorpio ascendant scorpio and what i show to the world is my scorpio ness yet from what other say i dont act like a typical scorp
Hi Phoenix,
You are a Scorpio sun sign with a scorpio ascendent? Are we talking about Quantity / Quality here?
I do not know too much about astrology or stuff like that. All that stuff kind of confuses me anyways – I just write about my experiences. Wish I could be more glamorous!!!
Yeah…I know how it feels.
Hi again Phoenix…
Another cup of Hazelnut coffee – such a treat down here!
Phoenix, I am trying to understand what you “believe” to be missing. Dealing with relationships…? Well, a relationship is no longer a “requirement” as you begin to define “self” based on the concept of UNIVERSALITY / UNITY / LOVE … a step at a time.
Meaning – you have learned to STAND ALONE in your life – and understand the immense responsibility this entails. So many adjectives to acquire and the perfect union of them all … compassion, mercy, wisdom, strength, consistancy, honest, powerful…etc. You see the difference between LIGHT and DARKNESS. It is all very subtle. But in the end – you reject all that is DARK and always search for the LIGHT in every situation.
You feel the “SOURCE” more acutely – as you surrender YOUR will – merge mind and heart together – as well as other things in the head region (again, I don`t know what it is exactly) and you BECOME…the energy / LOVE.
Then…you most humbly and quietly continue to learn and do your DUTY. GIVE! GIVE!! GIVE!!! Uhhhh – not everybody likes to be placed under the light of TRUTH, however. This is a downside – but it is unavoidable. However, you can NEVER cause harm or suffering to anybody.
I am not even a Scorpio – so I can not my thoughts on this area.
In summary – you see everything differently – under the light of GOD. The energies are INTENSE and beautiful – I imagine that “HEAVEN” must be like that. I am eternally greatful and treasure every life experience that I am able to feel – because it is a TRANSFORMING and precious gift. I am truly blessed.
The rest of the path has to be forged individually and silently through every chamber.
OK – I have written enough – and I thank everyone for their kindness and “putting up with me”. It has been very nice to have shared with you all.
Bye
its been a while since i have posted on this regarding my husband and divorce,,,he seems to be having some serious “down ” sides,,telling me he still loves me and will always care about me,,,he keeps tearing up about once a week,,says he never meant to hurt me,,and i said even though you and i grew apart,,i would have talked to you about saving our marriage which he still feels is my fault for not coming to galveston to be with him and quiting my job
i have tried to help him during these down times,,sometimes he seems seriously depressed, but i feel it is doing me more harm than good,,because i want to feel i am moving on,,we are putting the house up for sale,,he has 2 rooms of his things to pack so pictures can be taken to show it,,but just cannot seem to get motivated to do it
any info would help on these moods of his
Hi Susan,
Well, it seems that he feels very injured and sad – and faced with the consequences of a very hard TRUTH and he has to face.
Why did not you not quit your job – as you were married, to be with him? It is not an easy decision, I know. But you seemed to have lost your marriage due to it.
Why would he be so insistant that you had to give up your job in order to maintain the marriage? Love does see you through all things – even distance. However, due to the ego, we could be weak in our decisions to “hold on” as we distract our energy with other things and not on what we truly want. (if we know what we truly want in the first place).
Well, It all comes down to whether you love eachother and are able to decide on what you want. You can not do much with “tears” and “moodswings” but you can do something with “What do you TRULY want?”.
He either wants to be married to you or not – (his emotional state would be hindering him to acting on his truth), and you either want to be married to him or not – no more “guessing” on what you already know and your energies on finding the solution.
So, you and him can not do anything REAL, while he is being emotional. And you can not be REAL, while you are “worried about harming yourself” and want to feel “that you are moving on”.
I understand your health concerns – and your well being is a priority. I am just giving my view of your situation. But, please see to your health as a number one priority and obligation to yourself.
I want to ask you for an opinion on a situation with a scorp man.
We met, saw each other a few times, everyone could tell something was tangible between us. He never made a move, but did subtle things that made it clear he liked me. We never made it past that point, I attributed this to the fact that he knew I was going away for grad school and didn’t want to start anything serious. We remained friends, got a few emails from him, and in one he mentioned that he knows that I have a bf and later down the road (in a few years) he plans to marry me, and after that communication died down (once he got involved with someone).
WHAT DOES THIS MEAN? lol…. a joke?
Please shed some light!!
Hi GG,
Girl…he is involved with someone now – no joke there. Everything that happens from then on, is not your “jurisdiction”.
Wish him the best and hope that he finds true happiness. If you are friends, support him as best as you can. Sometimes, although it is extremely painful, the phoenix must fly to be all that he is. Perhaps he can be much more – with out you. It depends on what you know about him and what you are made of. It depends on whether you know what his true desire is. If you felt truth with him, you will see his path and all that he could be. Understand that you are forbidden to interfere. The truth is more important than the relationship itself.
So, if you are sad, shed your tears, carry your pain in silent dignity, and hopefully he understands your choice for him – and the beauty of it, and continues his path to what he truly desires and what he TRULY is.
It shouldn’t mean anything to you at all Girly.
Afterall… You, are the one in a happy relationship far away from this guy and in grad school… yet here you are writing about the ‘feelings’ you have for another male.
Shouldn’t you be writing about the intrigue and feelings you have for the male you share a bed with?
Looks like this ‘tangible thing’ you had got under your GirlySwirly defences more than you anticipated.
Just sayin.
And a person who wants to marry you, would have made “the move” – and not through email. When you love someone, you don´t let them go, you don´t let them guess what the subtle tangibility EVERYONE else is seeing in your relationship – and not YOURSELF, there are no games – because playing them and accepting them, is NOT LOVE.
I guess what I am getting down to is that there is RESPECT on both sides.
Therefore, the correct scenario would have been that before you left (for graduate school) you or him would have cleared the “subtle tangibility” for concrete “hard facts”, instead of each getting involved with other people and further complications with him saying that he wanted to marry you. No he doesn´t – and no you don´t either.
So, I guess what I am trying to get down to here, is why this is an issue NOW after all that has happened and the both of you seem pretty happy.
If it is an issue, then my previous comment applies.
Hi again GG,
It is a pleasant hot spring night down here. There is a party going on – and will go on until dawn. I love the music!
Look – as P.Puppy says, it seems that Scorpio – through “subtle tangibility”, got to your defences.
Well – what is there to “defend”? Did you have anything “to loose”? This would be the case if you had “ego” or deception.
So…release your ego. One must “BE”. Scorpio understands this – if he is a phoenix.
If he did not “make a move”, it is because he did not want to. If both of you were single before your leaving, it did not affect him – nor yourself in terms of this “relationship”.
So…you will be alright as nothing “tangible” occurred. He will be alright as well as he was not really “into” you.
In the end, one must make a decision – bend only to love (respect, trust, compassion, kindness, understanding, gentle severity, beauty) and nothing less. So find it – create it – BE it – in all aspects of your life and don´t let go.
Believe me, it is a lot harder than it seems. More “subtle tangibility.”
hmmm…I have a question, what would a scorpio man do if he thinks the woman is better than him in almost every way? can he ever love a woman like that? given the scorpio’s nature…may be we are doomed.
Hi JoJo,
Your comment is baffling. But nothing that a little humility could not solve.
Scorpio`s nature (phoenix) would see beyond your “scenario” of “being better”.
Scorpio “thinking” about a woman…(LOL!!!). You have to FEEL your man a bit better. Respect…for him…is a good place to start.
to jojo,
what do you predict he would do? has he actually said these words to you? why do you see you are both doomed? do you love him?
Hi JoJo,
My thoughts in this comment are for relationships in general. I have never put this in words before, so I hope that you will bear with me.
I am reminded of our previous discussion in post 366 – a quote by P.Puppy…
“We human beings LOSE OURSELVES in the PROJECTIONS of a moment. EVERY MOMENT.
So to not lose ourselves in other requires???
… Yes… a connection with a Higher Consciousness infinitely Greater than our Illusions of Attachment.”
How is this done? Well…understanding this statement and actually applying it in our lives, could save alot of heartache for a lot of people.
The idea of being able to connect ourselves starts with always placing yourself in the position of love and staying there, and BEING it. (This MAY be the hard part to maintain…for the majority of the world…99.9% – including myself. LOL!!!)
Therefore, if someone I love says to me that I am “better than they are”, I would be offended. This is because they are DISTANCING me away from from them i.e. they are not loving me and not letting me “BE”. This would hurt terribly, as I beleive that we owe it to the SOURCE to be the best that we can, with the wonderful abilities given to each and everyone of us.
We also owe it to the SOURCE to encourage others to be the best that they can be…once they determine what that is. (another hard part due to TRUTH and Spiritual awakening “you are on your own issues” !!! another LOL!!!)
If I do this to another person by “WANTING” that person to change, then I am placing myself out of the position of LOVING that person and changing it to WANTING. This could be reciprocal – as noticed by many dysfunctional families that are “content” in their “illusion”.
Sadly, most of us prefer the “illusion” instead of the LOVING.
“…what would a scorpio man do if he thinks the woman is better than him in almost every way?…”
Well JoJo, in my view, the classic male Scorpio nature (his emotional-psychology) does not, at deeper levels think the women in and around his life “are better”… than him. (We may ‘show’ the woman that we do, but in Truth, we don’t buy into it).
Why?
Our strong egotistical desires, our strong sexual desires, our far-reaching and conflicting emotional depths, our lofty ambitions and our simmering intensities… far outweigh any suggestion that we actually think a woman is better than us.
HOWEVER… (this is important)
I will say that classic male Scorpio nature does feel ‘the Power’ of women. Meaning, a womans- Sexual Influence… over men. It is this power of a woman’s energy-sexuality and subtle emotional introspection that has invisible affects on the common male- his Behavior. Almost always, the primary motivation within a guy in pursuit of woman he likes, is just a physical desire. Women innately know this. So through her subtle yet very powerful influence, women can and do control-manipulate their guy into ‘what’ or ‘who’… they want them to be.
So the Classic Male Scorpionic Nature does not “submit” to this very subtle controlling (psychological) energy. Because being under the control of a woman’s huffy moods, her irritability, her inconsequential whims and tests… are to the male Scorpio reality… “a deathlike experience.” Which means, we would allow ourselves to be at the mercy of the majority of anything said or done by our woman.
We can empathize with any woman. But she will soon learn that ‘what she wants’ us to “become” through her “quiet coercion”… ends in not her desired result from what she had intially expected.
So the Highest Male Scorpio Evolution, his behavior, his purpose, love and goals- will Transform a woman’s feelings and understanding of him and her world. She will inevitably be changed. Stronger and clearer.
Control-energy and Power-energy through relationships on all levels, are in the male Scorpio’s nature (his emotional-psychology) *** From the time we were bright-eyed babies.
Intensity itself… doesn’t take life lightly, or as it appears. And rightly so. Their is far to much fear and illusion in the world of people to sacrifice ones very private and developed personal power.
And to tact on another point regarding a woman’s incredible covert-stealth-control moves toward Scorpio men, and males in general…
… We can now understand why volatile conflicts ‘happen.’ It always comes back to that energy- Control.
Women naturally don’t want to feel controlled by immature men (their boyfriend), so they naturally initiate controlling energies… Before… the common guy understands his Role within the relationship.
We can see that almost every close relationship is made-constructed of 2 co-dependent people.
These co-dependent people Fear pure independence resonating in the other. For this means one individual could (if they choose) live quite happily, and in silence and solitude, AWAY from the partner.
Fighting and arguing which are never resolved, but are always repeated in relationships… equates to the usual consequences for living co-dependently.
Two Separate, Independent, Individuals, Co-Existing and Loving in an Intimate Relationship is very rare.
Hi JoJo,
Referring to this comment…
“Control-energy and Power-energy through relationships on all levels, are in the male Scorpio’s nature ”
A very powerful statement – but due to various societal norms concerning women, the “correct” behavior in relationships, and what a “good” marriage is, we normally do not perceive or have the capacity what this statement really means in order to obtain and respect….
“…ones very private and developed personal power.”
The struggles…the beauty…the MUSIC of it all…
The answer to your question would have been automatic.
Hi Pluto
Thanks for your words of wisdom ( i couldnt reply above)It is a lesson i am learning about the total and utter alter egos in cyberworld…your words are harsh but true. My naivety in this circumstance has taught me not to be so trusting, however i am not going to change my ways, even my leonine roar when i feel injustice. I will be more wary and i would love you to give me some more insight into the darkness as usually i am full of light like you said but this guys energy has sent me into purgatory!! maybe i needed to experience that to become transformed, stronger and more balanced. I don’t know but i want to learn all there is to know about the deeper darker sides
Thank you Leonine, for seeing honesty when it is present.
When a male Scorpio seems direct or harsh, Listen to him. It means he cares for you. If he’s silent and removed… avoid him.
If any male for that matter is telling you what you want to hear… look much closer, and with suspicion and learn to understand his motivations… especially if he constantly shows his “niceness.”
You’ll gain emotional strength by knowing how to change your inner-reality of love. Not what you “think” love is by trusting every fool with disillusioned inadequacies of their own.
Find the ‘Real’– and you will find the healthy manifestation of love.
…under the right MUSIC, what was invisible becomes visible…and the elements rejoice at such an orchestra. The MAGIC of it all – between the Absolute and the Abyss.
Kanye West’s first career productions came on Chicago rapper Grav’s 1996 debut album Down to Earth. ;`:
Hmmmm….
La Bella y la Bestia. Not exactly the same though…
What about Robbie Williams…Angel?
found some interesting info on scorpions thought i’d share..
Despite having six to twelve eyes – an obvious pair at the centre of the carapace and two to five smaller eyes on each side – scorpions do not have good eyesight. However, they can readily distinguish light from dark and appear to have excellent low light sensitivity, which helps them to both avoid harsh sunlight and to navigate by starlight or moonlight. They sense their way around using sensory hairs and slit organs on the legs, pedipalps and body that pick up vibrations and scents (mechanoreceptors and chemoreceptors). They also have special organs on the underside of the body called pectines, which pick up ground textures and scents.
Scorpions also fluoresce under ultraviolet light, which is a good way for scientists to find them in the field. The fluorescence is thought to serve as an ultraviolet sensitivity mechanism, perhaps allowing the scorpion to avoid damaging light levels.
Males and females find each other by vibration, scent and touch. During mating, the sensory pectines under the body are used to find a suitable place for the male to deposit his sperm parcel – the spermatophore. The male and female then perform a mating dance above the spermatophore, with the female being wrestled into position over it in order to draw it up into her genital pore. The fertilised eggs develop inside her body, and she then gives birth to live young. She carries the pale young scorpions on her back for the first few days or weeks, until they are strong enough to become independent. The young then disperse to find food and shelter. Scorpions take a long time to reach maturity, moulting frequently (up to five or six times over two to six years) in order to grow, and may live for two to ten years. Some have been recorded as living up to 25 years.
What causes the fluorescence in scorpions?
The fluorescence is caused by an unidentified substance in a very thin layer in the cuticle of the scorpion called the hyaline layer. Newly molted scorpions do not fluoresce. As the new cuticle hardens, the fluorescent quality increases. This indicates that the fluorescent factor is either secreted by the scorpion shortly after molting or that the fluorescence is a by-product of the tanning process.
Alcohol in which scorpions have been preserved may also fluoresce.
The hyaline layer of the cuticle is very tough stuff. It is often found in scorpion fossils. Even after hundreds of millions of years, while all the other layers of the cuticle have been lost, this hyaline layer remains embedded in fossil rocks. And yes, it still fluoresces.
Nobody knows the function of the hyaline cuticle or its strange fluorescence. Some have suggested that it serves as UV sensor (all scorpions are basically nocturnal and shun the light).
This unusual feature can make scorpions easier to collect and observe. When darkness falls, portable UV lights can be carried into the field where scorpions live. Scorpions caught in the nearly invisible UV light glow an eerie greenish color, making them easy to spot in the darkness..
Scorpions kill over a thousand people a year in Mexico.
There are over 1500 species of scorpion but only 25 can kill people.
Some scorpions can live a year without food or water.
Violent love: scorpion mating is dangerous for both parties. Most scorpions are loners because of their cannibalistic tendencies. When two scorpions meet, they usually fight until one is killed and eaten by the winner. After mating, the smaller scorpion is often in danger of being eaten. As females are usually bigger, it is the male which usually gets eaten.
The male and female find each other through pheromones, using their pectines. The male usually makes the first move, although some females do so. He usually has a complex courtship display to ensure the female knows he is one of her kind and not lunch. Some males “judder” (rapid rocking, shaking movements) to advertise his species (Vejovoides, Nebo). Some sting the female, possibly with pheromones, sedatives or other species identificators. Others club the female with their tails. Some males (Hadogenes) have ridiculously longer tails than females, suggesting that the length is important more for mating than hunting
Violent love: scorpion mating is dangerous for both parties. Most scorpions are loners because of their cannibalistic tendencies. When two scorpions meet, they usually fight until one is killed and eaten by the winner. After mating, the smaller scorpion is often in danger of being eaten. As females are usually bigger, it is the male which usually gets eaten.
The male and female find each other through pheromones, using their pectines. The male usually makes the first move, although some females do so. He usually has a complex courtship display to ensure the female knows he is one of her kind and not lunch. Some males “judder” (rapid rocking, shaking movements) to advertise his species (Vejovoides, Nebo). Some sting the female, possibly with pheromones, sedatives or other species identificators. Others club the female with their tails. Some males (Hadogenes) have ridiculously longer tails than females, suggesting that the length is important more for mating than hunting
oops sorry for the double violent love bit..accidently copied twice
“…Some males (Hadogenes) have ridiculously longer tails than females…”
“… others club the female with their tails…”
This sounds like the romp I had with one of my past exes… a female Scorpio haha.
It’s war alright. There’s no way in hell we allow a (bratty) woman to win. If a woman only knew of our mind/soul’s tremendous inner battle. It is a reality I wouldn’t wish upon anyone.
We have enough monumental wars going on Within Ourselves… let alone submitting to one of her whacked-out… Un-Controlled Tizzies:- Which in Truth, fail to promote psychological and emotional Growth.
There’s a pure reason ‘for everything’… and pointless dysfunction within the dynamics of relationships are no exception.
Hey Ummm, maybe you’d like to share with us some Eagle facts. The bird itself?
I’d hate to swoop ya.
hehe yes i thought you might get a giggle.
hmm yeh i know about the battle stuff. ah who hasnt had a tizzy. i wonder if she ate him or not after or maybe he ran away before that happened.love it hee.
yes eagle.. ok…
so glad that wasnt me
What do wedge-tailed eagles look like?
With a wingspan of up to 2.5 m, the wedge-tailed eagle is the largest bird of prey in Australia. It soars and glides majestically in the air currents for up to 90 minutes at a time, reaching altitudes that can go beyond 2000 m.
Where do they live?
The wedge-tailed eagle can be found all over Australia, but it is more commonly found in open woodland areas with a good grassy ground cover.
What do they eat?
Between 80 and 90 per cent of a wedge-tailed eagle’s diet is made up of ground-dwelling animals, including both mammals and reptiles. Rabbits, wallabies and small kangaroos form the main part of their diet, although they will also eat snakes, lizards, large birds, possums, foxes and feral cats.
When hunting, the wedge-tailed eagle bears down on its prey in a long, slanting swoop. Nearly all prey is caught on open ground, with the eagle usually feeding on the spot. Carrion (the flesh of dead animals) is also a favourite meal, and as many as 30 to 40 wedge-tailed eagles can be found feeding on one carcass. They are often attracted to the carcasses of kangaroos lying beside roads. As a consequence, some wedge-tailed eagles are killed by speeding vehicles.
Wedge-tailed eagles will eat sheep, but they usually only attack weak, dying or dead animals. Research by the CSIRO has shown that sheep account for less than 9 per cent of the wedge-tailed eagle’s diet, which has little effect on the domestic sheep industry. Most of the sheep meat in the eagle’s diet is from carcasses, dying sheep, or road fatalities on unfenced inland roads.
Daily life
Wedge-tailed eagles usually spend the hours around sunrise and sunset viewing their territory from the treetops. They hunt early, and for the rest of the day they either sit on exposed perches or circle and glide in the air.
Although they spend little time maintaining their territory, wedge-tailed eagles will advertise their presence by flying at high altitudes and gliding along the boundaries of their range.
Breeding
Adult wedge-tailed eagles pair off for life. During the breeding season they preen each other, and they will attack unfamiliar wedge-tailed eagles who might invade their territory.
The eagles’ nest consists of a large platform of sticks in the fork of a tree. Both sexes repair the nest, and the male lines it daily with fresh leaves. He will also occasionally sit on the eggs to incubate them, relieving the female from this task. During the incubation period, and after the chicks have hatched, the male does all the hunting. Upon his return to the nest, the prey is shredded by the female and fed to the young.
In a good season two chicks may be reared (see above for a photo of wedge-tailed eagle chicks). Usually only the fittest survives while the younger chick starves to death. Sometimes the older and larger chick may kill its sibling. In drought-affected areas, wedge-tailed eagles may not breed at all for several years.
A protected native animal
In earlier times, the wedge-tailed eagle was considered to be vermin or a pest because of its reputation as a killer of lambs and sheep. People were encouraged to kill them, and it has been estimated that at one stage 30,000 wedge-tailed eagles were destroyed in a year. The wedge-tailed eagle is protected by the National Parks and Wildlife Act. It is illegal to kill, trap or poison them.
“…The eagles’ nest consists of a large platform of sticks in the fork of a tree. Both sexes repair the nest, and the male lines it daily with fresh leaves. He will also occasionally sit on the eggs to incubate them, relieving the female from this task. During the incubation period, and after the chicks have hatched, the male does all the hunting. Upon his return to the nest, the prey is shredded by the female and fed to the young…”
Hey,
I really appreciate this piece of information. Talk about “Evolved Loving” in a partnership??
Wow, that teamwork demonstrates to me the huge leap in evolution from the lower… fearful urges, of two combative scorpions.
Thanks Umm.
I’ve learned something nourishing from that.
There’s a great clip in that Eagle bunch. Everyone should take a look, and… feel it.
It’s called…”Even Eagles need a Push”
Beautiful;)
you’re welcome. yeh it is evolved loving. and completely natural.that little shot of the eagle sitting in the nest i wondered if it was a him keeping the eggs warm! i read also that some eagles choose to stay together and not breed too. i liked the “push” film too. beautiful. i could spend ages watching these.
The Female Phoenix Scorpion…
She is the gateway to the Universe, with Plutonic energies being her Father – Guardian and Protector. She frolics in the deep, dark pools of Pluto, and flies close to the sun to feel its fire burning in her body.
The phoenix female scorpion battles the universe. She has no problem in facing the forces of heaven or hell – literally, if someone makes her feel.
The male scorpion who penetrates her, unlike his penetration with other females, hands his very life into her sorceress hands, even if he is the most dangerous and deadliest man to others. While other girls are deciding what to wear for the day, she could receive a spiritual message from a cosmic messenger – “choose” he says- “his life or his death?” And she is shown the past, present and future. She sees it all and her tears fall to no end. All before breakfast.
Her surrender to the divine rules…and she must choose his life. She disappears and dies…again.
No tizzies here.
Alphonsina in English
Talk about evolved loving…
Much has been written about the Will…
The Wedding beds for these ineffable beings are the roots of the trees.
…Thus the seed penetrates the abdomen of the female.
When life is crystallised, then appears the fruit in the plants.
Thus surges the life of the etheric world.
United in spirit, divine will and purpose, but not in body.
In the end, she must choose life. In this case, she must choose the brightest LIGHT that he can be. The Phoenix.
Her eagle days are over.
Actually the Highest, Purest Scorpionic manifestation of the Soul relative to the etheric is, the Dove.
The Dove of (Peace) Pisces, the last Sign and House on the Evolutionary Wheel. It is The Christ Consciousness.
Except I have discovered something else through my particualr Journey…
Becoming ‘a purely’ compassionate human being toward fellow man… all the time… every waking minute… for let’s say 80 years of our life… in this life… is to Not Fight and Seek the Battle for the Treasure in the Divine Power of Our Underworld. Our Shadow.
Do people dare tread the life of finding and conquering their Shadow… then ultimately transcending it? In my social, material experience with other people and their inner-realities, no, not many.
Evolutionarily speaking… The Journey is through Valley of Death. Scorpio. Followed by the brilliant Ascent of deep/vast psychological-emotional healing, through the Philosophical Meanings discovered in Sagittarius.
Such Fears envelop and dominate the Pisces natural, ultra sensitive consciousness… in the ‘material’ world and it’s consciousness of that framework, or level of existence.
These are limiting and delusional projections of ‘the Personality’
I am Pisces Rising. I see-experience many worlds of the human existence.
Imagination (Pisces) drowns Ego. Dissolves it into the cosmic egg. Ego is lost in the Illusion of that Infinite egg, Unless… the Battle has been victorious in Hades prior.
Freed of the Struggle and Fear through the Gifts bestowed of Hades, man Finds Truth, Justice and Wisdom (Sagittarius). His very Being… his Essence, is now flooded IN the Divinity and Virtue of Good AND Evil. Light and Dark. The Known and the Unknown. The Vision of Good in the human condition and ‘the Understanding’ of Evil in the human condition. Beginning and Ending with Him-Self. Know thyself. Thy whole-self which now INCLUDES the Dark.
So his consciousness, No Longer is the Physical Form. He is no longer a Personality. He is vastly more.
Christified will is fire. Surrenders only to universal will. Not to those who try to control it. The dove is the divine result of the application of the phoenix verb/will. The eagle is the observed pure thought that separates the scorpion from truth, after victory with piscean imagination, Hadean death, and acquiring your sagitarian wisdom and knowing yourself completely.
Had a nice time. Thanks for the class.
Hi Leonine,
Cyberworld egos…very interesting topic.
I am Sorry about your Scorpio and for his deception. But you seem to be very strong about it.
Not being a Scorpio myself, making this into a transforming experience, would make me question my processes.
With my experience with Scorpio, all is never what it seems, due to their incredible capacity to WANT something and to make you “FEEL” this particular desire. There is an Indian Legend, which talks about a man who manages to make every woman FEEL that he is walking and dancing, only with them. The reality is that he is with around 10 women. Quite a talented fellow!!!
How do you escape from this “purgatory”? Well, you have indicated that you are full of light and will not change. But in my opinion Leonine, I believe that you have to.
I don´t feel that one can escape “purgatory” as it is the “projection of what we have created”. If you are a Leo like me, you must try to understand “cyber-scorpio” and what HIS purgatory is. If you can not get out of that, well…
…it is understandable why HE can´t.
It is never about winning or loosing – to a bratty woman or a deceitful Scorpio. It is about LOVE and our expression of it. Journeying into the Abyss – yours and his, as he has surely included you in his Hades.
The transformation starts there. Pluto is a harsh judge of character, but he knows what it takes to balance life and death…and the UNIVERSE.
Thanks Gatubela
I believe i am strong to a certain extent, am still in denial. You see as a fellow leo i do believe and trust people, maybe more so than i really should. i think because of the length of contact for over 18 months, i genuinely believed that noone could be so cruel as to keep someone believing that what they said was true. I think for myself it was the way that he kept speaking of meeting that made me truly believe it would come to fruition, as i believe he probably was using the same lines over and over to different women at different intervals. His ego becoming ever increasingly stroked by countless women and was actually zapping us of our positive energy as we whisper sweet nothings to him and make him feel special.
I am interested about that indian legend to get a truer understanding if you could let me know what it is.
I would also love for anyone to offer any really good healing mp3s or audio to kind of assist me on my own personal quest.
I gave up on a lot, lost interest in my own life (which is wrong i know) and pandered to the needs of a guy who made out that his life was so bad and i tried to help. Is it wrong to want karma to kick in? or does that just make me feel even worse for wanting justice to be done in the eyes of the higher forces?
Hi Leonine,
I forgot the name of the legend – all that I know is that it is perhaps related to mantras and mandelas?
Leonine, yes, it is essentially wrong to want Justice and Karma to kick in.
Again, from my experiences with Scorpio, they do not perceive things the way we do. Actually, if anything, we relax – momentarily, their eagle eyes predator focus. Have you ever FELT a scorpio laugh? No small feat!!! That moment (more like micro-second) won´t last long, but it is nice to see a bit of heaven before Mr. Harsh Reality comes back!!!
No, they are not wrong, but he refuses to accept deception from others…even though he is the master of it himself.
He knows what he has done.
By what you feel, you have an idea of his “purgatory” and his journey of life. He, in a very strange way, has shared it with you. Scorpios DO share. It is not their fault that the average human being does not contemplate societal extremes and states of being (and non-sates as well)on this plane of existance and beyond? Is this teatime conversation?
As always Leonine, stay in the light, for now. Venturing into the dark pits of Hades must be made with someone who cares about you – and did not or will not continue to…decieve you.
Let his own plutonic forces be the thing he has to contend with. Perhaps it´s “BBQ” time again for him.
With regards to your feeling about “spending too much time and pandering your life…”. For me, my personal growth is NUMBER ONE. So take the time that is given to you. It is a precious gift.
Hi Everyone,
Here is a song that is in Portuguese…
The best version is from Andreas Vollenweider and the name of the song is “Cor do amor”. “Colour of Love”
It is not a love song, the concept is a bit more ample and cosmic. A bit different from “Eagles in Love” or “Eagle swooping down on a Fluffy Bunny”!
I feel very fluffy indeed, putting this in , after those “eagle eyes” looked at me in the swooping movie. But… I am a brave bunny! Maybe I should improve my “zig-zag” technique?
Translation is below:
Get out of the Storm, shut off the pain, dance softly to the sound of colour, that walks on the peace of the love …that arrived
Our first emotion, was born of song, the same naivete, arrived for always and stayed
It marked our lives…and traced the steps that we followed…, we were happy we know…, written in our souls,… our lives, …completely guarantied …and the emotion dominated life …and so much love flowed.
Far from the storm…, far from the pain…, we danced today to the colour of love …that the song brought …and it stayed forever.
Happy Halloween Everyone!
The night here is warm and summary and I can here the children trick or treating!!!
Big Hugs!
What happened to my English???
The night here is warm and summery and I can hear the children trick or treating!
Ahora si está bien!!!
The eagle – truth – descends to the scorpion purgatory -deception – explores its deep depths to the last possible experience and learns its lessons. The choice is made clear. Applies the fire of the phoenix and transforms to the Dove. Spiritual alchemy.
This is daily transcending existence.
The deeper secrets and laws of our being are self-protected; to learn them requires an adaptation of character and purpose, and a humility of mind and spirit, inconsistent with those displayed by the perverse or merely curious enquirer. To understand, let alone practically to explore, the Hermetic Mystery is not for every one–at least, at his present state of evolutional unfolding. . . . Only to those whose spiritual destiny has already equipped them with a certain high measure of moral and intellectual fitness will even a rough notional apprehension of it be practicable.”
And yes, a gifted Will is imperative for a victorious descent into the Underworld. The Shadow.
The Warrior also needs immaculate Vision to slay the Beasts and to Learn from them what the Demons are Teaching.
KING of SORROW must always look for PEARLS.
Sorrow?
No. Be careful. I don’t live in regret, sadness or misfortune. Quite the opposite.
That statement is false, for me.
Only a personality conceives that idea as truth.
And not surprisingly, she is a female Scorpio… who in my experience are total nihilists.
There is no honor, virtue and courage in sorrow…. that means- Self-Pity.
And I’m sure the female Scorpio knows about that;)
You could have easily said…
“KING of VIRTUE must always look for PEARLS.”
That…………… is Truth.
But no, that would mean you’d be putting yourself beneath me.
Haha, such is the amusement of nihilism.
Not this time.
Nihilism?
You soar like an eagle, but no peace in your words. Only truth.
Arriving at the Truth isn’t painless.
That’s the whole point of the Warrior taking the fight into the deeper caverns of his psyche and emotions. And then ultimately re-birthing them, over and over. Transcending them.
Look, you may have ‘meant’ well in your initial statement.
But whether you want to believe it or not, calling me the King of Sorrow is a farce. It is a joke. Considering my entire self-expression, it’s expansiveness, depth and history of passionate views on this site.
The bottom line is, your statement is YOUR Reality. We ARE our thoughts. And your thoughts (more importantly Feelings) were reflected in that statement, through- Your world. Not mine.
There is ‘Zero’ Personal Growth on the Path of Sorrow. Zero Possibility, Faith and Hope. Only Oppression, Self-Denial and Self-Pity. Which all represent the Antithesis of our entire conversation.
Do we have an understanding?
In my nihilistic world/
Personality is judging others according to limitting subjective and personal experiences.
I can never be greater than the lowest expression of myself. It will always be a part of me. Therefore, I am no-one to judge.
I am not perfection. I have yet to understand the wonders of the universe.
My universal and cosmic ignorance – sorrows me. Maybe I can have PEARLS of wisdom.
We all work from the nihilistic bottom – up to our limitting and partial perception of virtue.
You judged incorrectly.
King of Sorrow is a song from Sade. Pearls too.
I was sharing with the forum in the hopes that someone could read it and feel it. Like your Eagles need a push.
The application of severity –
If I were another woman – you could expect a range of emotional and psychological responses from me.
You won`t get them from me. You know why.
Truth may be a painful process.
Understanding is an illuminating process.
Truthful understanding between 2 people, anywhere – anytime – through compassionate use of severity is a divine process and a divine state of being.
Eagle spanking the “truth” rod over someones rear end…
I will take a spanking / If I deserve it.
Haha… my intent was not to spank you by any means, but if the energy becomes necessary between us or anyone else for that matter, I say ‘exactly’ what I feel to be True in each moment.
There are many other sides to my identity where for example, I could have chosen to go with the flow and ignore your “Sorrow” perception.
But if I had done that, I feel both of us and our viewers would not gain anything Meaningful from this exchange.
Within real-world social interaction out there, I cannot speak this way, as I openly do on this site. I have to constantly accept levels of consciousness with friends and associates which usually bore me to tears.
So my point out of all of this, is that I am actually being my Real, Deeper Core, True-Self… right here on this site.
So it’s been a privilege letting out my deeper-self.
And for that,
I Thank you kindly;)
Contemporary thanks is not necessary.
Most people receive it as a ego bolstering moment.
However – hearing your cyber intentions through cyber truth – is the cyber simbolic gift.
That is the only thing I cyber paid attention to.
For the viewers in our forum – two people who have true loving intentions towards eachother can mutually transcend eachothers
fight into the deeper caverns of …psyche and emotions.
So – save the fuzz for my pillow.
P.S. I will work improving the sorrow perception.
What is your age Violet?
How many broken hearts have you shattered along your way? lol.
I’d hate to turn up the steam while everyone snoops. You mentioned your need for a spanking and a pillow, which I won’t… follow through with. haha
This could turn into a heated moisture novel. The faint of heart need not tune in to this one.
i was just going to say its getting HOT in here! snoop. hmm seems the first video i put up is translating well. hehe. im preparing the rock now..and dont go hiding now..ive got your back(s)
” two people who have true loving intentions towards eachother can mutually transcend eachothers
fight into the deeper caverns of …psyche and emotions.”
perfectly said. thankyou
I don´t break hearts.
Fine – I will be a good girl.
Because I choose it. For now.
So you came clean about Not being “a good girl.”
But you also believe that you “don’t break hearts??”
A huge contradiction, don’t ya think?
Hahaha… a woman never says what she means. Fascinating.
Just please don´t ass-u-me again.
Or you will find yourself pressed up against the rock. Or do you think you can put me in my place?
Oh dear! I got bad again.
I already have, put you in your place.
I didn’t assuming anything. You have admitted being an incarnatation of that bad little Devil.
So my ‘Response’… spanked you square on the rump, which happened to hit the target.
Oh and don’t worry… I’m very good at hitting the target.
Pluto Puppy
Look beyond your need to –
put me in my place
and
spank my rump
What is there?
Pluto Puppy –
I disrespected you.
I am cyber sorry.
For other women –
You sick puppies.
Get some virtue.
Umm –
You should cover your own back.
I disrespected your cyber buddy.
You did – an empty nothing.
Had fun doing it?
Out –
i was asleep actually.time difference. poo. no i didnt have fun.
Post 540
Ha.
Whatever. Bye Violet. You’re too much fun;)
Well what an obvious dumb ASSUMPTION on your part.
Do you know what Playful Banter is Violet? You know… Lightheartedness??
Ever experienced such a thing??
… I’ll help you. It’s an energy where you Don’t take yourself so seriously to the extreme where you begin FEARING INSIDE, violent feelings you don’t even get. (nihilism whispers to me again)
Now.
The post written by my/our good forum friend ‘Umm’… on post 540… was in REFERENCE TO- the Video of two “Scorpions” Fighting… can you believe that!? lol
She (Umm) was Supporting us through Love. Beleive it or not. I love Umm for her Grace and Peace. You could learn plenty from a Taurus Nature, Violet.
So before you go aimlessly “disrespecting” people… start finding the Truth first.
It will set you Free.
BTW. I have openly flirted with dozens of women on this site with no harmful, monkey business intent. Just ask them.
Typical femme Scorpio jealousy showing through over nothing;)
The Scorpion video on post 520;)
You will help me?
You help through your truth
“Intensity does not take life lightly”
not through scorn –
“Ever experienced such a thing??”
Not through insults –
“dumb ASSUMPTION ”
Not through the intention of –
“put you in your place.”
That “incarnatation of that bad little Devil” needs “to slay the Beasts and to Learn from them what the Demons are Teaching”
So Pluto Puppy –
“You could learn plenty from a Taurus Nature”
Save your bad intent, ignorance, extreme-doubts, fears, self-loathing and manipulation for other people who will buy into it.
My motivations, through my CHOICE of speech, have been Good to you… Regardless of the words you find in that expression..
Yet your ignorance is obviously incapable of understanding that.
Pick a NIHILISTIC fight with someone else. Not here.
Save the reply. You’re a distant whiff of negative energy in my mind;)
“My motivations, through my CHOICE of speech, have been Good to you… Regardless of the words you find in that expression”
I am not ignorant.
I needed to know a bit of your essence? Not diplomatic – but good motivations.
Hades gives the quickest answer.
Nihilism – Chaos – destruction
with good motivations…
Reality – order – creation
With love…
Divine Reality – Divine Order – Divine Creation.
Thank you for being…good.
I Am, through my behavior-essence, our (polar) Taurus Nature, more than you’ll ever know.
You just happen to ‘draw out’ the Hades in me… which does no longer holds (evil, self-destructive) power over me, like it once did.
I have a very close relationship with Dark, Evil Deception, what it Is, and it’s Lessons. Yet now, that inner-blindness does Not hold ‘Influence’ over me. — As it does with you.
The Lower-sexual-drives (expression) of Scorpionic Tests… are now clearly understood as feeble attempts to ‘deceive and control’ my Higher-Consciousness in heart and soul, or life and death.
peace;)
I am not blind. Not influenced. Not deceived.
For the rest of the Forum –
The power of a beautiful and pure mind –
Humility is in the heart.
It quiets the mind.
The nothingness you are here
The all you are there.
It permits you to see the secrets of the universe.
One can not get distracted.
I did not bring out your Hades.
You did. It should have never happened.
You know this.
One must surrender more to love than to deception. Until You ARE.
Thank you
For being… divine.
Praise now huh??
A complete contradiction from your earlier spiteful statements. It is interesting… what was honest from you, what was is lip-service from you, what were pure games by you… are very much still in question.
Why.
That’s easy. You have not once been personable and affable in your communication. I call it plain manipulation and secretiveness.
Still I find it funny that you couldn’t be lighthearted, invigorating from the heart in the beginning when I had talked mischievously about hitting certain sweet spots.
Again, honestly… you’ve been lacking pieces of you, on genuine levels, consistent of ‘Who’ you are and ‘What’ makes you lovable or avoidable. It’s all missing. Your focus has been on me, and that is unhealthy. You don’t share anything of yourself with us. Why?
For that extreme secrecy, I’d rather not want to get to know you. You don’t trust yourself enough to even answer a harmeless question when I asked your age.
Instead ‘you chose’ (amateur) games and tests. By copying and pasting my originality and sincerity. Those games don’t baffle me, nor surprise me. Nothing has been gained on personal levels. Therefore this exchange is Artificial. Good bye. Praise the days ahead;)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ABe4o099M8s
Thanks for answering my question, I didn’t mean to offend anyone with my short question, I know people sometimes say none is taken, but, just in case. He had said these things to me, not in exact words, but to the effect that he feel his life is worthless after he met me and more, I feel unconformable disclosing these words, although we shall never meet, but, still, the sense of violating his privacy is there. I won’t elaborate then, but I know this was what he thought, whether this is the reality or not is not important and I can careless, but as long as he thought and may still think this way, this is what he acts upon. I bring this scenario here and make it a case through the credibility that I am a libra-scorpio cusp with mercury sign in Scorpio, I’ve observed and found consistency. He had backed off from our relationship when he felt there is nothing he can offer me and become very sensitive to things in my life, my work…everything could easily hurt him. I thus become silent, because I don’t want to hurt him either intentionally, as a result of him distancing me; or unintentionally, just talking about how was my day. This silence, I suspect made him… for the lack of a better word… suspicious of me, because he has showed me his life like an open book. I told him my secrets, but not my daily life, because I know everything in it will hurt him, I tried to tell him, and he was hurt every time, and I told him I can’t tell him anymore if he gets hurt every time, he got hurt for that …This is the beginning of where everything took a turn for the worse…a heart breaking situation. He eventually found someone else due to some very complicated circumstances, I found silence, which I use to hate coming from him, but I understood silence now, words just have too much power or no power at the same time for things I’m able to share, so silence. Then, between last post and this one…he felt that I wanted to move on, and start to feel hurt again, It kills me to hurt him, but I can’t really go back to where we were, because through it all, we both lost trust in each other to some degree and I was badly hurt, after he had shut me out, I’ve made a sincere decision to give someone else a chance, a promise I can’t break…agr, I was ready to be a friend for life, it took me a lot to walk away with dignity and care, why is it he has to stir everything up again when it’s heading for nothing but the end? I’m very frustrated so here I am, thanks for any insight you offer me, sorry for my raw posts, I just don’t have the peace of mind for anything otherwise now.
Hi Jojo
When you said you wont meet the scorpio i just wondered whether you met him online like myself? They have a great way of making you believe that they are suffering such heartache and i am not sure as to whether any of these emotions are genuine i am sorry to say…i tried to look for your original post but i dont seem to be able to find them
The abyss again!!!
Look, in this case, I feel that we must analyze in terms of “what you wanted” when you were involved in these relationships.
The relationship is over, but perhaps not what you wanted. That is still rampant and alive. What is also alive is the “scorpionic residue” (LOL!!!)
It does not matter if he is “cyber-scorp”…or “&%$-scorp”. Your feelings are a mirror. If it is not love, then … there you have it.
Either way, the “shadow-scorp” knows what is real or not. When it is real for them, nothing physical or astral, stops them.
I could not help but see the word “nihilist” in a previous post. (uhhh …who couldn´t!!! …Fluffy Bunny scampering for cover.) Interesting.
yep. Nihilism:
“an extreme form of skepticism: the denial of all real existence or the possibility of an objective basis for truth”
or this definition….
“total and absolute destructiveness, esp. toward the world at large and including oneself: the power-mad nihilism that marked Hitler’s last years.”
In my own words… it is a reality know and felt as:- “the Absence of God.”
And “God”… is All Inclusive. This means the Whole of: Fearlessness of Dark Volatile Unknowns, + the Brilliant Beacon of Shining Light, Joy and Possibility.
Every, and I mean every… female Scorpio I have ever met, known, or slept with live in such Peril.
To this day, I am yet to ‘see’ their SOUL exposed in Deep Humility.
Nihilism is essentially the lack of Virtue.
Sorrow, knows Nihilism intimately well. They feed off of each other;)
mmmmm…
if looked as an isolated event, you are probably right.
She seemed to be looking for something though. Maybe you gave her a PEARL (LOL!) Pearls are hard to come by…
Hi again Jojo,
So…what is your problem again?
It was a bit hard to catch. You say that he feels his life has turned worthless since he met you? And both of you have never met, so you are “just friends”.
You do not know much about each other´s daily routines, but know all of each others secrets? So you have a bond through the “unknown” instead of the “known”.
Well,usually the known is comfortable for us and the “unknown” is not. In your case, it seems that the “known” is giving the problem. Sounds like a kind of spiritual bonding, going beyond the “norm”.
Now there is no trust because something happened? i.e. both of you became very hurt, but he is stirring things up again.
I have never heard of 2 people caring for eachother, under very complicated circumstances, who know absolutely every secret about the other. That is DIVINE.
For me, your friendship would have to be based on unconditional acceptance of eachother.
Well, since you have never met eachother, it can go either way. He cut you off, so you got nothing for now. I hope that you can re-establish comunication and work it out.
Well, maybe, since you know everything about him, you have a great treasure. Scorpios don´t share that with anyone… their inner world, that is.
Lucky you.
hmm, When we were together, I promised him no matter what happens; I’d stick around and never walk out his life as long as he wants me here, just in different capacities. This is a promise I intend to keep. So I had wanted to be his love, now I want to be his friend. I found the promise I made is very very hard to keep, sometimes I don’t understand what’s making me so stubborn to keep a promise that might have no meaning anymore, but if I gave up on something I promised on with my whole heart and soul and I don’t see why I can’t keep except finding an easy way out, then what’s in this world that’s worth keeping and fighting for? So my promise, I need to keep it for me, and not really has to do with him. It’s just hard. As to my previous post, I understand what would offend people in my comment of being better, but, really, I don’t care about being better or worse, sometimes words fail me, because there are so many predetermined baggage comes along with it, but I can’t redefine the dictionary every time I speak, but I do understand where the side looks come from. In the three views of reality, my view of him, as I told him, if I’m the super computer, then he is the human brain, he is built to arrive at the same or more intuitive solutions at the moment he’s given the question, I can only arrive at the end and he is already there and I’m in awe of him. In the view of the protocol of society, I am better in things I don’t really care about, no matter how impressive a super computer is built, it’s just a piece of machine, it only shines when machines are compared to each other, it holds no candle when facing the creation of strength and beauty . It’s his view that I focus on, because it would shape the reality that is us, so I present his view as the scenario I’d like to ask opinions on, as to how I arrived at my presentation of his view, I’ve shared all that I feel comfortable to disclose, and I am using words that are presented to me like hurt or better, but could actually be something else all together as you pointed out, and delivered to me in a front a man of mystery feels comfortable to disclose. I understand and respect this, and will take him as he wanted me to believe, because it really makes no difference what are the elements of motivation, it makes a difference in what he’s willing to give under the circumstances of this scenario he wants me to believe. I also understand the reason I’m here is not in the interest of science and discussion, the reason I’m here is largely driven by emotions and restlessness. my question is answered in the name of science and scenarios, but I found answers are not what I am looking for because you guys were right, the answer is there, yet it left me restless still, just as I was not really into putting together the puzzle that is him, because I’m caught in the emotions of being me, the amount of looking I did into him has already left me bloody and scarred, I understood the reality of living in a world of parallel universe as a Scorpio, but it hurts me no end to have to give up my need for justice and equilibrium as a Libra (or as a Scorpio/Libra which only believes the equilibrium I perceive through a personal value system, not necessarily through the midpoint of a two sided view) , to be able to live in that universe of pure liquid energy, that shifts its shape and weight as the current carries it, with him. I don’t really want to look anymore, and I can’t live like that too, so it’s me that’s not still, not the wind of reality, but I need to talk, to rant and just find a channel to speak the frustrations I felt. And as I write out these thoughts, it also becomes clear to me what he is doing to stir thing up at a time when I found this comfort zone of being a friend, he might see it as an insult that I am able and want to stay in this comfort zone that satisfy my personal need and expect him to take it as I gave it, he might want me in his life, but only on his terms…it requires more though on this … then again, this might or might not be the place to do just that, but I thank you for your ears and words and opinions.
Make up your mind little Libra.
Practice, through habit making a clear and self-assured Decision or twothousand… without fearing the ‘Inevitable Conflict’ ahead.
There is no such thing in life as ‘perfect harmony’ in the way of people pleasing or continuously avoiding open, direct honesty… even if that honesty ‘means’ a temporary exchange of negative energy between each of you.
You can make quantum leaps in any type of Relationship (Libra Rules 1-on-1 Partnerships) JoJo, ‘by feeling’ the Discomfort of your good, honest motivations in making those solid choices through your communication, minus the mental-fluff and overthinking.
You can find clarity and self-assurance by listening carefully to your gut (hunches) trusting them, and speaking up with Scorpio. He will appreciate your strength, IF he can see it in your assertion to open up without any self-doubts.
Libra nature can learn a great deal about life lessons through the individuality and self-assertion of their (your) counter-part nature, Aries.
Practice ‘choosing’ in your communication with people without fearing the other persons response. You can do it. Try it, over and over until you see that there was nothing to fear from having clarity in the first place.
You’ll eventually come to realize that all your past tentativeness in relating with people was ‘an illusion.’
A “Balanced” dynamic within a close friendship or relationship must… must have some conflict before ‘harmony is understood’ between two people. Not just one person.
He does not seem to be someone who feels his life is “worthless” after meeting you – unless he was comparing it to something greater than himself or yourself.
A man who lives in the liquid flow…who understands that, right? What does he want to create while controlling the creative flow within your dynamic? Sounds crazy, but kind of reminds me of something I read in a book about a tree, elements and some swans.
I wonder if he has strong humanitarian drives?
Based on your comments, he also has to deal with his emotions of being “him ” if he is hurt by your daily activities, although you are the one not being still.
Breaking boundries or fabrics of anyone´s reality…uncharted territory. Potential Nihilism comes to mind again and in this situation, the only thing that will “keep it alive and stable” would be Godly virtuous behavior to maintain the “cosmic zero REAL moment” through Cosmic DIVINE Law.
I am feeling a bit abstract today. Your problem is probably more simple than a philosophy textbook, but I went down the “bunny hole”.
I´m gonna have a cuppa coffee and clear the mists.
I’m aware of the Nihilism, I was operated on by someone on that and left open and bleed a year before I met him, almost didn’t survive. And that’s how I recognized him, the pain and rebirth within, he had patched me up in away, or allowed me to patch myself up by simply standing by me and listen and bared his own pain for me to see, that I can make it, and I have to make it, he’s trying to stand tall through all that he endures, and it shames me if I don’t try. I did make it. He is someone in my heart I feel an eternal gratitude for. Someone I never want to hurt willingly, someone I will keep my promises, and die trying. About my past, about what happened between us, I’m not comfortable to disclose here. So, I know it’s hard for you to make sense of what’s going on, but I do appreciate all your effort and willingness to try for a stranger from the net. I have made up my mind, because I can only be his friend now, in the chronicles of what’s happening…I had bared my heart and soul and pain, and secrets…howled out my pain for his withdraw…everything that a person can do without going twisted, I tried again and again, was cut again and again by silence…and other things… until everything in me was burned to ashes, I look at the ashes in me, and tears just run down my face, I’ve lost the fire of love for him, I have nothing left in me to give. Yet in this ashes that is me, I know I won’t walk away, I love him more than the pain and death. When I still burned, I loved him as a fire, now I love him as ashes, a care that’s eternal, but doesn’t burn anymore, I watch in tears to see that everything leave me…jealousy, sleeplessness, void, pain. It kills me because it kills me to see him hurt, but I can’t give him what he needs now, I’ve nothing left in me to give. I’m restless, angry at fate, caught in an emotion I can’t name…because he never wanted what I’m able to give, when I can love, and now when I can care…I am angry because if he can’t accept what I have to give now, then I’m going to hurt him again as he was hurt from a past that I can’t touch. I’ve tried so hard to make him feel loved, now…I’m going to be made the butcher… I hate this, I’m in the grinder of a different kinds of pain now, if he has feelings for me, why now? when everything is too late…why take me on a road leading to nothing but to hurt him? Agr…I want to kick something.
I cried a river when I saw a picture a few days ago of him with someone else apparently at a very intimate moment posted up by her, he said he feel he was setting himself up, repeating the same kind of mistakes… I have not the heart to tell him that I cried, because upon seeing that picture, I feel nothing but a pinch. How do I change that? The heart is not an organ to be controlled by the mind. I read somewhere, that the saddest thing in the world is to look in to the eyes of someone you care so deeply about, and realize this person in front of you is just a stranger with known name. At that moment, my heart just broke into a thousand pieces, I wish I could still feel the stab, the sting that plague me from just a look at his beloved face, when I still loved the way that brings me so close to him even as he pushes me away. I lost that, something so beautiful, I lost him in me…I am crying now, how sad is the tears now, my heart has given up, even as my mind never will…I want to walk on any road he takes me, to suffer the pain of losing me with him, if it’s blood he wants from me, I want to give him that, a promise I made, is not to watch his life on the shore, but to be in the currents with him, drawn or move, I want to, but there is nothing left…just that pinch, not even painful. Gosh, this hurt so much. I told him to remember me as yesterday, remember me this way, but keep on walking…what else is there left to do but to hurt him? I have always told him what’s in my heart from the time we met, good or bad, anger or pain, despair… But I find I can’t tell him what’s in me now… I hurt so much to think the pain it will bring him. It hurt so much to not be able to tell him what’s in me.
“… I have made up my mind, because I can only be his friend now, in the chronicles of what’s happening…”
“I cried a river when I saw a picture a few days ago of him with someone else apparently at a very intimate moment posted up by her…”
No JoJo… the deep, wrenching ambivalence is eating you up inside. I’m sorry baby. You can’t be “only his friend” and then… cry a river over what you had ‘Felt’ after seeing him with another woman.
There’s too much co-dependency in both of your emotions, from what I feel in your story.
The idea I had mentioned to you prior, you know of “choosing?”… was to help you ‘separate’ from those dark-underbelly emotions of Pluto in your psyche. Finding your “Individuality”… which really Means Emotional INDEPENDENCE (Aries) will you the PERSPECTIVES you need.
The answers rest inside of you sweetheart. Don’t let every emotion you feel, strangle you to death because of the Mercury in Scorpio Obsessions.
Mercury in Scorpio is teaching you to gain Wisdom through your painful feelings. Not to suffer forever through Sorrow and Dependency.
You’ll get through it. But you should try and objectively See and Understand the deep emotional attachments to that person, who is also living through a journey of “death”… remember, he has his own obsession lessons to sought out aswell.
best regards;)
thank pluto for your insigh…I probably didn’t make it clear…I cried, becasue I felt nothing but a pinch when I see him with someone else, the tears are for the relization that what I had felt for him before, is gone now, and I can’t get it back. I have lost him because my heart just won’t feel anymore. He said he loves me just a moment ago, yet it brings me only sadness…Thank you again, it’s just that…I’m so sad.
Hi Jojo
I have been reading the emails coming through on the pain you are going through at the moment. I am sorry but i am not following whether you two have physically met and whether he is a scorpio also?
He will be alright. Trust me. Seek to Transform yourself JoJo.
He might ‘say’ he loves you, but the facts are in the reality of your situation. He is simply not open in his communication showing that he WANTS to be with you, evidenced through his behavior.
So that means he might love ‘the idea’ of being with you. But the Truth is still in secrecy between both of you. Which means there are still high levels of fear and uncertainty of deep, complex emotions.
He is/was ‘in Lust’ with you JoJo.
That’s why he can… and does, find other women who’ll get the sexual motor running.
Look, I’ve stated our strong drives on multiple, intense levels on a previous post.
He’s no angel. Placing him on a pedestal too often is an unhealthy attachment or association.
And I say this, because I believe that he’s in a stage of his life where he does not, or cannot “Know” Him-Self… meaning, his complex ambivalence… like uncontrolled sex drives, no awareness of emotional detachment or dependencies, no refined or defined personal values, no explanation to you of higher principles, and no sense of a persoanl Truth that you could accept, and so on…
In other words, the guy still has just as many issues to figure out “through his experiences” in life.
It all depends on his Current Evolution.
And his current evolution means whether he is a man of Character and/or Higher Principles/Values… or whether he is just manipulating each circumstance and decieving women around him for the motivation to get what he wants out of them.
Which = ‘the very common’ unevolved male Scorpio.
Be kind to you JoJo. Work on you. Find another guy. -**Possibilty** exists for you. Nourish yourself with that Faith. ReBirth is always out there for you to embrace.
Choose;)
Gosh…don’t tell me you love me, it hurt so damn much that now I can’t love you back…don’t torcher me so…I can’t even face you now…what is it I can say to you? I’m just hiding here in the safty of being a stranger in pain…damn it!!!
jojo,
pluto puppy has given you some very valuable instruction.
i can also see how you are letting the emotions take over you to the point of sabotage.i know it cos i have been there too.its ok that you’re not feeling the things that you want to feel now. i see you putting alot of pressure on yourself.none of us are perfect and sometimes it all just takes time. go easy on yourself. he said he loves you. work on you now.as a separate being from him. .its ok that you dont know what to say too. thats OK. all you have to do is be honest. slow down, be gentle with yourself.it will be ok.
I am trying to understand why someone saying that they love you brings you sadness and that you only feel a pinch when you see him with someone else.
Jojo, in my opinion, there are many kinds of love. Emotions are a part of life but they PALE in comparison to BEING love.
I don´t know too much about mercury in Scorpio, but based on what you have said, the guy loves you, it makes you feel sad because the relationship is going nowhere due to the fact that both of you are with other people? There is a strong suggestion of co-dependancy?
I guess most of us feel that the emotions of life torcher us – I don´t. But then, I prefer to suffer FROM emotions than suffer from the LACK of them.
I have learned to value my emotions and my emotional state of BEING and who I really am. They do not torcher me any more. They are my teachers. The mistake is staying in an emotional prison for too long. I quickly return to a state of acceptance for my life, for the people that are in it, and I have learned to love unconditionally. The pain of others is very respectable but it seems that we FEEL, but do not HEAL. They become open wounds that imprison us.
In a strange way, I have learnt that my emotions permit me to lift myself up to what I know I have to do. For example, my sadness takes me away from my connection to a very DIVINE part of myself. The extremes of my emotions allow me to VALUE my connection more. In a way, I won´t know what is GOOD, if I don´t FEEL the BAD. They are my pathway to perfection and to the DIVINE. If I follow the path, I will get there. So follow your sadness to its source. It is your pathway. Deal with it with the best of yourself, learn to give, even under these trying circumstances.
Therefore, I would say to you, RELEASE your emotions to your LOVE for this person. Release your pain – as you clearly know its cause, to LOVE for yourself.
If your circumsstances are causing you intense pain as to “hide as a stranger”,(your saying) well I can say that I have undergone extremely painful experiences – both physical and emotional, and through it all, I held on to the one thing that I had. Me, and my belief that I could do it. My pain made me human and in a strange way, saved me. As opposed to not feeling at all – always the easy choice.
The beauty in life, the great acts in history, the sun rising in the morning, for me, is based on emotion. I always imagine that anger about the sun “being on all day” motivated the creation of night – an act of love. No one should have to suffer with the lights on all day!!!
Have you ever struggled to CREATE something? Creating something from start to end, is PAINFUL. You go through all of your personal TRAUMA. More so when you create from the “ashes”.
Relationships and life circumstances are a symphony. When you care for a person, or are stuck in a painful circumstance, search in yourself, the perfection of who you are, and the beauty.
It requires that you breath in slowly and calm yourself down. Something is being asked of you. Give it, selflessly, until perfection is obtained. Your cyber-scorp deserves to be happy – with or with out you. At least make sure that he REALLY is and is not just SAYING he is, through his silence.
Remember, the idea of giving can be translated into raising the level of energy. If you are feeling torchered, then release and accept. In a way, make a paradigm shift in themselves through surrender.
If you can not see past your pain, then listen to some music and surrender to it. (Something soft mind you) Then backtrack yourself to the center.
How many people know your secrets? Gee, I can count them with…my nose.
I have a question regarding cyberscorpio and regarding emotions. i am confused with whether any of the strong emotions they seem to portray can be warranted as true. This has been more of an inner battle after spending so much time in cyberspace both sending deep emotions to each other, deepening the connection as well as talking about what the future would bring. I think that has been the toughest test for me personally, as although it begun online, it also ended rather badly online after finding out so much deception as mentioned. I am still trying to vercome a lot of the deep emotions that were felt from my side, as well as suffering a great loss of ONE i considered my soulmate. I understand the implications of an online relationship but i was so true to my heart and still am. I went through periods of such darkness, such terrible pain and emotion and the absurd part was that wehad never met. We had formed such a strong link (or so i thought) and i was always so sure that we would be in each others lives regardless. The problem is online interaction can also sabotage many of us and it also manages to stir up feelings of frustration as well as loneliness at times. I will never know whether the words that were spoken and read will ever be true and from that i am trying to focus on deep healing. I do believe that he may have moved on to other women as well as sharing his polyamorous thoughts and feelings for many that will accept them. I dont know whether the 18 months meant anything or whether it was just a cruel act of control. I have decided to focus on myself, i have switched off ties with virtual worlds and contact that would further leave me stuck. I have had to try and rebuild a lot of my hopes and feelings on soulmates and not focus on the destruction of my own faith. I am trying to learn the art of forgiveness and also trying to understand the motivations he has in place for his mysterious online activities and secrecies. Mainly i am staying true to myself and as you said trying to feel that happiness for him in a darkness that i feel has consumed him for a number of years through addiction and ego.
I never considered myself ego driven, i do not crave attention and i have a very honest attitude. I am the same person in and out of here.
like you said i am trying to see past my pain, i am trying to restore my faith in mankind. So i suppose i am asking whether there is such a thing as polygamy? and how that can translate in the modern world or is this just a cover for someone to lead a carefree existence rather than addressing their inner selves?
Umm,
Thank you for your kind word, it’s heartwarming and brings a smile to my face.
Pluto,
Sigh… I can’t believe it, but in many senses you are dead on, about him. Not necessarily the sex drive, but about the un-evolved self awareness and higher principles… I didn’t want to talk about this aspect of him, because I have accepted an imperfect being and want to love him for who he is, I don’t have an illusion that I can change him, but in the bottom of my heart, I see the goodness in him, the deep humility of the wrong he’s done to others, or the will and acts he took to fight on…to evolve, in that process, he is still going to hurt people, but I for the stubbornness in me, believe if people believe and recognize the good in us, we will strive to become better. Been loved, seen for the goodness in us, is a powerful motivation. I had in my fight for the love I felt for him, decided to go through every step of the way with him. You see, I, myself is just as imperfect, I’ve done things in the past I’m not proud of, the Nihilism for example, in my world it means “the lack of uncertainty”, including the righteousness of my criticism and skepticism, the righteousness in maintain a state of laziness, the righteousness in attacking whomever exams the image of “everything is perfect” I’ve portrait for so many years…the lack of fear and deep humility. Even now, after the “death” and “rebirth” of facing my nihilism, I’ve only achieved awareness, still, I’m not displaying the “imperfect” of me, not disclosing the part I play in creating the “high levels of fear and uncertainty of deep, complex emotions” between us, yes, it’s a two way thing. So I’ve tried and failed, to walk on the path of continued self discovery and rebirth with him. I find comfort in the pain I felt now, because in the mix of this very complicated and complex situation, I’m leaving him behind…the guilt, and sadness, almost a tribute to what he had done for initiating me to my healing and rebirth. Even just by the accident of mare presence and illustration of fighting on.
It’s very nice to have re-read your earlier insights too, now that I’m not so emotional charged, I can see you have actually answered a question I had that’s being bothering me in the back of my mind for a while now, and I will start to practice to slow down the all consuming, and separate the woods so the fire won’t burn at once, thus consume all the source of fuel and leave nothing but ashes too quickly. Stay in control, find connection in separation, and maintain self in a bond. Sigh…easily said than done, and just in time, might have saved me from another pending fast forwarding. Yes, slow down… and choose.
Leonine,
hmm, I see what is it that you seek…to confirm and to relate, in a pain that feel so alone and lost…I see some of the questions you asked below, but feel hesitant to answer, because I see the old me in you, the need to confirm and going back to the comfort zone of finding an answer and stop there, the answer can only lay within yourself, and it’s painful to look for it, but it’s necessary to do so in order to be aware, and live with it. May I ask why it is after 18 month, the two of you still hadn’t meet? Don’t answer me, answer yourself, in this world, knowledge is power, sometimes to be used improperly and towards personal agendas, so don’t answer me, answer yourself, hope the answer will set you free.
Gatubela,
I am so very sorry, I didn’t really want to answer you, because I don’t really like you very much. Sorry again for my straight forwardness, because I sense an animosity you have towards me that is beyond objective, I’ve learned that people dislike in others the things they hate in themselves, in my case, again, the Nihilism, it exist in every woman I met, some men too, just in different degrees, in my struggle to learn the subject myself, I found the reason why it plague women more so than man, the more emotional, the deeper the degree, it makes sense, but an entirely different subject. But, as I said to Pluto, the “lack of uncertainty”, every punch line you delivered me, can be rationally explained, the fact my first post is a product of randomness, a random act of seeking confirmation that it is not me who can’t be loved, but he can’t love under the circumstances, not unlike what leonine is doing now. There is no heart or communication in it. But in the progress of communication, facing sincerity and care, I return the sincerity and care in kind. Yet, you seem to be more interested in looking for holes and perceived inconsistencies, therefore making any “care” you portrait in your post a compensation for what you need to deliver, the blow. This, making the “care” very fake. I don’t want to judge why you feel threatened by me, or not by me, I’m a stranger you don’t care about, but by something you feel you might lose, again, answer yourself. I know everything defensive is born of some kind of pain a person suffered in the past, I have not the capacity and care to get involved, it took months for the person who operated on me to penetrate my walls, because he doesn’t have the deep care and love he needed to finish the job, he left me there to bleed and die, to this day I dislike him, therefore I will never be him, I will not do it just because I can. You need someone who loves you truly in your life to walk the path together, or some professional who respect deeply what you will be going through and be there for you. But please, forgive me for my honesty and the fact I will not answer you again.
JoJo,
I hope I have contributed something that you can use and become each day.
The process of transformation inside us begins and ends by way of Self-Love– First. (After a long descent into Pluto’s Underworld).
Just to let people know, hmmm… it took me about 12 years until my 32nd birthday, to find the true me. So if we had communicated on this forum let’s say in 1998, all of you would not be hearing from me. Period. Those were some dark… dark years. Nothing casual.
I accept imperfection in people. If I did not accept, I would not have been blessed to learn so much about my True Being through the essence of other people.
Be kind to yourself JoJo. I really mean that. Monitor your anger, jealousy and insecurities. Soothe them with Gratitude- for the Divine.
See Good (which means God) from all the pain. Acknowledge the potential of incredible personal growth from all that you think is lost. For in Truth, nothing is lost… only Gained. Be awake to your silent mental states. Still the mind baby. Quiet the personality noise from your experiences. Breathe. Meditate in a hot bath. Feel the greatness of absolute Silence. Let those soothing, clear, peaceful feelings teach you to not find or extract “false love” through the illusions of another person.
When, or If, we ever find a healthier, braver… purified Individuality… we realize what self-love IS.
What is self-love? It is the joy and validation of giving– Self-Approval. It means no longer looking outside for acceptance regardless of the fears ‘to not’ belong in any group or family.
It is that beautiful song we hear from our inner-security and to the frequency of Truth whispering within-us, and the empowerment of letting-go of control impulses in our environment (people and events), then healing any crippling cynicisms and karma… through bold self-honesty.
Be well JoJo, you don’t have to bleed to death anymore. Unless you choose to extend your deliverence (from evil) Because no-one in this world can inherit the brutal responsibility of our psychological emotions. No-one.
We must be held accountable for the rewards discovered in true love. And that reward, at the end of the day… is Magnificent.
Know thyself little Libra. And love will find you in abundance;)
JoJo,
Let’s look at your above reply through the Infinte Soul.
We eventually discover that ‘Perfection’ exists in our human Foibles.
Perfection does not exist until one can See ‘Universally Past’ the Myth of man’s own creation (his vice) which speaks to him within a Godly Soul Center.
Love Puppy
Puppy,
The power of vulnerabilities, I’ve found out, is that when wounds are offered and opened, the healing begins, regardless how the other react. If it’s real love and compassion, then your own vulnerability would be seen, respected, and cared for. If there is no real love to begin with, then, the coldness and cruelty you receive is the beginning of recognizing something for it’s lack of substance. Either way, healing begins as soon as that vulnerability is offered…
I’ve done it in the past, the offering of my own pain, but without the blessing of awareness, the healing was stalled and not recognized for it’s power. That power, it could set you free from wasting your consciousness and energy holding on or hiding that wound, let you get pass the blockage of emotions beyond the hurt, it would set you free from guilt by recognizing your own act of courage, and knowing the pain you cost others as your decision to move on is part of the path of their own choice, and that choice is forever remaining theirs, to let it become a blockage that deadens their lives, or let it be a opportunity for growth and transformation through pain, pain is never evil, what people do with it makes it what it would become. This this what the new awareness everyday showed me of my vulnerabilities of the past.
Today, facing my hurt and pain, as I close my eyes, I feel tears pooling behind my eyes, because silence, it could be used as an act of cruelty for rejection, and it can be an act of love for restrain. Only in peace and acceptance of self, I recognize the difference. and silence is enough, the act of acknowledgment is enough. so the pooling of tears behind my eyes, it’s emotion beyond my own wound, I feel the suffering of you, of me, of everyone, and I see my own cruelty of ignorance and blindness, and I feel that collective choices and acts and consciousness that brought us to this point of reality and emotions, I feel the tears fall in endless streams, I feel compassion for you, for me, for everyone. I can’t say the word “forgiveness”, forgiving myself, the word separate me from the unity of oneness I feel with the pain of being human and our own unique energy, so…love, at this point of time, is the compassion for the past, openness for infinite possibilities, and letting go of the expectancy of an out come. It feels healing, to write this out in the tears of love.
I’ve been meditating, reading, and researching. I read about my own cusp of two SUN signs, and the practice of observing both the thought patterns and emotion patterns at times can be overwhelming, as if I can hardly get out the trance of observation within. then I moved on to read the rest of the 10 sun signs, then the awareness hit me. That a large part of the hurt comes from the sense of failure to become part of something extraordinary, that I’m not made for transformation and rebirth, not to take your words out of it’s context and circumstances, but simply observe my pain to this statement, I become aware of the denial of my true-self, that myself, regardless of what I want to become or be as profound and extraordinary, is what I need to find and accept, the path is to find me. The pitfalls and strength of the 12 signs of humanity, it shows me that I do have my uniqueness to offer, and the meaninglessness to get lost in your pain/joy of being you, this is not what love is about, love is about the sharing of that uniqueness and openness to embraces other’s uniqueness/pain/experience, therefore expend the self to merge into a much bigger and higher presence, the bigger the capacity to love and the more we offer to open ourselves, the grander our view and reality becomes.
Love, jojo.
Oh, and I’m now known as I.B.M., aka, international bunny of mystery. Jojo is a name I no longer feel connected to.
Hi JoJo,
I understand your position, and of course, it is alright with me.
No, I do not harbour any hard feelings for your situation. I have tried to look in my posts and see how this could have been interpreted that way by yourself, but I can not find the “emptiness” that you perceived. So, – I will chalk it up to a misunderstanding between the both of us and the fact that we see things differently.
In the light that you may be interested in my position with regards to your situation, I was reflecting the process of dealing with Resistance. The process of overcoming it, is perhaps a bit mechanical and cold, as it starts with me identifying clearly what your situation is and then proceeding down the trail of emotions. It is one of the ways that EGO can be removed and a true solution can be felt and obtained. I understand that it is not for everyone.
No harm intended. I hope that it all goes well for you.
Pluto,
Thank you for your care and advice for me, I’ve been reading this blog, focusing on all your previous posts specificity. I never did read this blog in its entirety, the Scorpio in me was turned off by the few I did read, but maybe I just came upon few pretty bad ones. I am glad I did post something here because of the insecurity of the Libra in me to seek confirmation, otherwise I wouldn’t come upon the wisdom you share in your comments. It will take me some time to read them all and process them all, and then I will come back and share my thoughts with you. I know in my gut it will bring me growth.
Getubela,
I’m not surprised you don’t know why, because if you do know and still do it, what kind of spirit would that make you? But I will try to tell you frankly and honestly.
A Scorpion sense love, or some call it intentions, everything already begin before you speak, the air you vibrate, whether with kindness and love, or an agenda for some personal demon you need to figure out on your own, before you speak, the air is vibrating with it. This is how I know, because all knowledge begins with love, knowledge without love is a weapon, called power, and the only time power can be beautiful is when it’s here to set people free. Have you come here to set me free? Or using me as a stage to showcase your own importance? If you really do care, why is confusion and lack of clarity of certain facts important to you when someone is in pain? And if you don’t care, why are you here? Because if it’s love and care inside of you, you would want to give what the others need, freely. You would feel sadness if you can’t, you will not find the need to defend and explain; you just do, and give. Otherwise, it’s all an act, fake.
I do sense you are trying to understand, this is a precious thing, keep that, keep the want to be close to truth.
You,
For some weirdest gut feeling I have, for the love of God I don’t know why, I sense you here, reading what I wrote. In that case, keep on reading, everyone of my thoughts should be open to you as I promised, it hurts me when I can’t keep this promise, which happens quite often since I went bananas on you, and you do know what fact I haven’t disclosed that lead us to this point, see, my selfishness is always here, yet you’ve only ever claimed silence, believe what I told you, you are one darn likable guy. Then again, I could be wrong, I’m just speaking to air, but for some reason I don’t believe that, wired, you know how bizarre things always been, like this. As you can see, I’m going to take care of me now. I know you’ve always wanted the best for me, I have never take granted for the care you’ve showed me ever since we met, and I never will. Remember? Unconditional and forever. Be ok, be whole, and be happy.
“… This is how I know, because all knowledge begins with love, knowledge without love is a weapon, called power, and the only time power can be beautiful is when it’s here to set people free.A Scorpion sense love, or some call it intentions, everything already begin before you speak, the air you vibrate, whether with kindness and love, or an agenda for some personal demon you need to figure out on your own, before you speak, the air is vibrating with it. ”
Yes, wonderful understanding;)
Our blood (changing emotions) speak to us too.
Pluto,
May I email you once I’m done with the soul searching? hmm, in a sense, this place is no longer a sanctuary to me.
If you wish JoJo, no problem;)
“Because if it’s love and care inside of you, you would want to give what the others need, freely.”
You are right, and I did – freely.
Thank you for answering, I had believed that you wouldn´t – as you had said. So, I explained my intentions first and foremost, in an effort aleviate any more pain that I may have caused you.
I can see that I screwed up.
Thanks for showing me the beauty of you and please continue how you are, with the people who are helping you and disregarding my posts, which obviously have caused you more upset.
“This is how I know, because all knowledge begins with love, knowledge without love is a weapon, called power, and the only time power can be beautiful is when it’s here to set people free…”
I disagree.
“Knowledge WITH love is power” and not WITHOUT as you indicate.
Knowledge WITHOUT love “setting people free” is something that is alien to me.
If you feel like talking with me, I would like to understand your point of view – always under the my most sincerest preocupation and consideration that it does not cause you more pain. Perhaps I have misunderstood something?
“… knowledge without love is a weapon, called power.”
Hey. Gatubela. You don’t ‘Understand’ her.
Let me explain.
JoJo means that knowledge without love is:- THE ABUSE OF POWER.
In which people of today and throughout eternity have functioned their ah-hm! “knowledge”… onto another being in society from purely Egocentric… Self-Interest Motivations.
Aka- Soulless Relating.
It is the ubiquitous Abuse happening all through society, on all levels, and in all areas like our career, our families, our education system, our government, our entertainment overloads and information age, and our complex relationships… all of which others rights and boundaries are used and abused everyday. It is no-conscience Dictatorship. It is quiet Coercion. It is “hidden” Manipulations. It is Endless Lies. It is Heart-less Deceit. It is Baseless Thoughts. It is foolish Hubris. It is Gnawing Greed. It is Astonishing Hypocrisy … and the list of Controlling, “Abusive” power measures go on and on among us.
So ‘Where’… in all of those personality manifestations exist the Truth… from those realities?
Nowhere. Is where.
All of the above is present and very real in ‘our day-to-day Culture’ These are the same people in our daily lives who constantly share with us ‘How’ to think… and ‘What’ to feel.
A Higher Soulful-Consciousness Being, does not base it’s reality of Truth from an act of “agreement” or “disagreement”…
… That Gatubela, is made apparent in the bubble of the LIMITING human intellect (or personality, or ego).
Yet Higher Soulful-Consciousness, ‘does’ UDERSTAND… much deeper nuances and meanings beneath the mimicry of the personality.
Understanding “knows the Meanings” behind and under the Unseen, Within the reality of another human being especially all falsities and ignorance.
My basic point here?
I know what JoJo MEANS. And JoJo knows what JoJo means. So I understand her view… WITHOUT the need to “disagree.”
You are dead right, there is no power in ego knowledge (dis-connected from the brilliant intelligence of the Heart and the powerful fearlessness of the Eternal Soul)
The only thing a baseless ego is champion of?…
… self-defeating delusion;)
The only thing a baseless ego is champion of?…
… self-defeating delusion;)
… So my comment in that is where the cliche of… “a man creates and becomes his own myth” … originates from.
The important distinction in the above view, is that human beings certainly ‘can’ gain enormous material wealth, fulfilment, happiness and prosperity through “the Games” of the collective mind. (Our Culture).
My point now, relative to the previous post, was that “the Game” out there in our society (speaking from a superficial reality) … is in Truth— “the creation of Man’s Myth.”
So to end my perspective on this… a man’s “created Myth” is equivalent to… ‘his personal understanding’ of Truth.
There is Paradox within everything.
So the entertainer/artist/moviestar/rockstar who feels tremendously alive and vital during the adulation and love of his or her adoring audience, is one excellent example of a man or woman living through the creations of their own myth.
Somewhere in the psyche and deeper emotions of a persons reality, they believe themselves to be “living their Truth.”
Again, Truth lived through Heart, Soul and Ego… is Relative to the Spiritual Evolution… and Path, of each and every human being;)
Thanks for sharing your understanding. It was kind of you.
We are given great abiities at birth – I shudder to think that great intellect does not serve its purpose in the great scheme of things.
Everyday, I go out and see the heartless intentions of people and their connection to their mental concept of self. It is literally, a slap in the face.
I say it this way, because I have not perceived the soulful connection that you talk about in my daily routine. Their minds are asleep and I can hear their disrespect and disregards for themselves and for the very being of who I am. In other words, I am an object. This crushes me almost in a wounding sense.
So, if great intellect is soulfully connected to the heart instead of to itself, it is a wonderous gift. But perhaps misunderstood and perceived incorrectly. However, what is not appreciated is the time and careful consideration it requires to try a comprehend a situation and then connect it to the SOURCE – very humbling as you are clearly shown…what a doofus you were.
It is a death process and the mind / ego must get used to being flexible and not fixed. The mind must be a river that permits the flow, and not the rod that punishes and judges and stagnates – i.e. it is in a state of constant death.
Great leaders have the gift of oratory. Their words and great capacity – still resonate – Jesus Christ is an example. Yet, his intentions were doubted by many. So someone telling me “I do not like you” and then trying to teach me from the position of PAIN – speaks volumes to me. But perhaps, not to others. But then, my truth is considered very harsh for many.
Between accepting what I see in the masses (or better said, “what I do not see”), I struggle to define it first and foremost. Under this context, I feel that a VERB is required.
Just “Being” is not doing anything yet – for me. However, I struggled very hard JUST TO BE. So, what the heck is my problem, huh?
Besides, I am ignorant and painfully aware that I do not know everything about a situation. So I struggle to completely BE who I am, with my logical processes and intuition – indicate to me. So, although I AM, I realize that I AM MORE.
Soulfully understanding and applying (internalizing) the knowledge – is a weapon, but the power and the will to use it, is granted through love. Otherwise, we will fail with what we “KNOW”, and especially if we KNOW BETTER.
This will always give – visible results in this “paradox” that we live in. So, what should be the modus operandi?
Uhhhh…. have some ideas … still working on it.
Gatubela,
This is a very important time for me to maintain “silence”, I need to do this for myself, and for someone I care deeply about, so I will not elaborate on what I say now, I hope you understand. Sigh, I actually don’t have a great deal to say about your disagreement, because I understand what is it that you are seeking, I think you understand the context of which I said what I said, yet you have a need to disagree, a need to make me see your view, which, no one would disagree in the context you are presenting , so all that’s left is the need for me to see YOU. I do see you,I said I don’t like you. When I say people dislike in others what they hate in themselves, don’t stop at applying to you, it applies to me too. I don’t like you because you remind me a great deal of myself before my rebirth. I also had the constant need to defend a position of self-importance, hmm, when I say self-importance I mean the tendency of correlate everything other’s say on a personal level. How do I explain this … The need to defend an exception in a discussion of generalization….the need to get emotional compensation from others when making an effort…the need to present an action motivated mainly by emotions, with logic… It’s a form of Nihilism presented as the eternal victim, kind of the aggressive form of tax law in not having tax…I don’t know if I’m making sense. I don’t like you but I don’t have an opinion of you, you are a sensitive soul not unlike many people here, I don’t like you because I didn’t like the same thing that was in me. So don’t take it personal, it’s not a personal thing. It’s a disliked stop on the road of self-discovery, if you don’t stuck there, it’s never going to define you. Think of it this way, if you can’t stop looking at yourself, how are you ever going to see what others are actually offering and sharing? And how are you able to absorb the knowledge/love that is available to you from the shared simple need of finding truth?
Pluto,
Hmm, I wish I read more of your posts, but I didn’t have much time and the time I had I used to ponder other personal things as you know. But I’m already awe struck on what you are sharing here. I see people share personal things, but usually as a result of the emotions of the moment, there is no consistency in this nature of sharing because it’s in essence a series of emotional bon fires people went through. But you’ve been here for YEARS, with no less passion in sharing knowledge/love, and understanding of growing pain. I find myself wondering what motivate a person to do such a thing, I have in my life, see people motivated by hatred and a sense of injustice to fight on the mob mentality for years, in fact, he was the person who operated on me, I joined his fight for four years before he wanted to make an example out of me, during that four years, I had to constantly ask why am I doing this, because he was using evil to fight evil, the darkness often eat at my soul, but I stayed, telling myself this is out of compassion for someone surrounded and never given up, I have not yet healed to the point of able to examine my own motivations of staying in that darkness and using it…with ease. So I’ve learned death from him, and I’ve learned love from the person I came here for, now…I have a feeling that I’m going to learn…joy, from you. Joy in sharing…in loving …in understanding…It must have been a powerful motivation too, because I see it in you with its full strength still, after these many years…how? I have decided to continue write to you here, hmm, because, I want to share my self-discovery with him, keeping my promise of open my thoughts and share my “silence”, in this way, I will not be leaving him behind on the road of rebirth if he cares to look. I still feel naked in a way because what I say…is public, although the “public” don’t know it yet. But I ask myself…what I’ve got to hide…that will make anything really better for me? I don’t know the answer, but I’m still here, so I guess, this is a step forward, to finding that strong, yet translucent joy and grace.
Thanks for the brave love JoJo. Always nice to hear honesty regardless of outside wildfire.
Exorbitant materialism and social/career status are primary Inatiators, or Causes, for the Illusions and Projections Infiltrated into the minds and hearts of— The Collective Mind.
Watch Music videos. Just assimilate the desperate and feeble yearnings for approval in those videos… ‘to sell’ YOU (the public) the creations of mans Myth.
I’m talkin’ movies, music, TV, books, and pop-culture INFLUENCE over the flocks of asleep sheep.
And guess what?… society EATS UP all that humdrum like it were an emblematic gift for “self-discovery.” lol. I can’t help but chuckle at what is around me.
What’s around me, all that humdrum, WANTS to tell me… ‘How to think’ and ‘What’ to feel.
There is no Pyschological Power, Purified Individuality, Uniqueness or True Self-Love gained from believing the evident Lie.
We arrive full circle in this discussion.
“…I find myself wondering what motivate a person to do such a thing…”
The more I share JoJo, the closer I feel to the Source. I am discovering dimensions of me that could never evolve if I did not put ink onto paper.
I feel an incredible gratitude as I write.
Thank you;)
Hi JoJo,
Thanks for writing – it was much apreciated. In this context, I guess “I don´t like you either”. But it is alright. We all work with what we have.
Living life intensely – and truly living it…I could have done worse.
I will be taking a break from the forum – I am back to fighting for my life again and on the run with my children.
Take care
Hi JoJo,
Uhhh…break over. This time, I am not accepting being affected by the “Known” parts of my life, and am preferring TO BE the unknown being of myself.
THIS IS THE PARADIGM SHIFT IN MY REALITY. and it has allowed me TO BE who I REALLY AM. For me, it has permitted me to quantum jump from various realities and energy levels…darkness being one of them.
Therefore, I do not react to the fact that I will loose my life, my children, my properties, my job, my house, peoples good opinion of me, furniture etc. – because honestly, I have already lost them all. By focussing only on “GROWING the SEEDS of the UNKNOWN”, my life is fruitful and beautiful…and I have lost nothing.
Again, of all the things that I can focus on, even in my moments of pain and crisis, I choose to focus on what is beautiful, and life giving. Disagreement…or polarization, as long as it is not a state of being, can bring life, as it is one of the paths to the SOURCE. You just have to know how to walk it. Therefore, being able to transform polarizing dark moments into unified moments of life – is truly a divine gift.
I liked this very much…
But I ask myself…what I’ve got to hide…that will make anything really better for me? I don’t know the answer, but I’m still here, so I guess, this is a step forward, to finding that strong, yet translucent joy and grace.
Well, if you want to know the answer JoJo, it is there. All the answers are there to be discovered through living truly and searching.
If you feel that you have something to hide, then the answer may be hiding as well. So…What is it that you have to loose?
Well, the most valuable and divine thing that can exist…
Yourself.
Girls. Let’s give it a rest already.
Our motivations are not supposed to prove eachother right or wrong. Or who can scratch and pry the biggest Annoyance out of the other person.
Gatubela, it would aide your spiritual journey to just let things be (in others) and bite your tongue. I’m not kidding.
Curiosity is important for our growth. BUT, not for the sake of puffy points of view to keep the drama machine rolling. JoJo did tell you directly what she sees in you. A virtuous trigger in your emotional reactions would be ‘to Not’ react at all.
You don’t NEED JoJo’s approval, do you? So why the tizz do you seek it, by reacting?
I know that many (almost all) women on this planet NATURALLY love the invigorating feeling of catty argument, mindless gossip and tizzy bliss.
That fizzy fire in the belly won’t solve a damn thing if we don’t know our inner follies toward ourselves. We must learn to grow up somehow. And get on with it. Minus the need to exchange ‘opinions’ which do not cultivate personal growth.
Sharing is caring. Let’s not veil the drama of our “caring” comments– with a false and insincere senses of the moment.
People can sniff that a mile away;)
herehere
This puppy is taking his nap.
Way too many innocent bunnies to shepherd for one man. And not enough energy to keep’em balanced;)
zzzzwhhhoblblububblblzzzzz.
hehe.. nunite. me have nap too. im going on surf trip . need the energy. later…
Hi P.Puppy,
No drama machine – your perceptions are extremely wrong.
Look – you said it yourself…
“Exorbitant materialism and social/career status are primary Inatiators, or Causes, for the Illusions and Projections Infiltrated into the minds and hearts of— The Collective Mind.”
For the other people of the forum – and even for future readers…
I could be quiet about what it has meant for me to battle myself, the society that I live in, and even the collective mind of the contributers of this forum – but then…maybe someone will benefit from what it has really meant for me to be myself.
So…I won´t stay quiet P.Puppy. And you have a nice nap.
Look, someone may benifit from seeing how hard it is to shed “inward follies”. You are the one with the problem, you have to get on with it, and you have to “grow up”. The emotions and psychic energies are SO intense.
In my case – in one year, I have nearly been put in jail 2 times, have had to move 6 times and lost everything, have received various death threats, and have nearly lost my children 3 times. Yesterday, I was left out on the streets again. This is because I am not only fighting myself, but a machista legal system. I have made breakthroughs, but it has been slow and full of anguish. There is much at stake.
So P.Puppy, I so wish that this was just a typical “women´s fit”. That would be very relaxing and fun. It is not. I wish my life struggles entailed only the trivialities that you blithely mention and characterized me with and in the Timeframes that you have deemed necessary to “grow up and get on with it” and not have my spiritual journey reduced to a “drama machine”.
I may have translated it wrong from Spanish, but this resonates with me very much…
“Let the person who is NOT without sin, throw the first stone”.
Wake up P.Puppy, the journey IS different for women. Despite anything that you may say, or what anyone else says, and your future judgements, if one person can benifit, then I have done my duty to the SOURCE. And I have done my DUTY to you too.
I don’t get along with women who talk under 5 feet of wet cement.
Talking is one thing. Understanding… is another.
Looks like my perceptions aren’t valid afterall. Hm. The drama machine has now reached new heights. Who knew.
Tell you what. I’ll be the one to not respond to your breakthroughs. I’m just getting in the way of some major yap time.
Good day;)
It is not 5 feet of cement Silly!!!
The impossibility of reaching any understanding (Harmony through Conflict)
probably lies in the fact that this is a virtual environment.
You can not really get along with anyone, while you do not really know them.
You do not know me, and I do not know you. So, this really, is not REAL.
So…it is alright.
“…So, this really, is not REAL…”
Plant those two little feet firmly on the ground.
I’ve never doubted your physical environment. We have the power and ability can change our current circumstances. Always.
Let’s not plead for attention on this site. That choice… is extremely naive and selfish.
Scores of other people have the right to contribute on this site. They have the right to spill their own revelations or experiences, un-incumbered by 3 or 4 people who can’t shut up.
We are not cyber hogs. Remember that. So be gracious about it;)
P.Puppy,
Cyber hog…LOL!!! After all I have been through, that is kind of cute. This is me being gracious after your various “meanie” posts.
Look, Mr. Bossy Boots, I am not pleading for attention, I am not being selfish and I am not being naive…and I do not appreciate being admonished like a child.
Erroneous opinions can be given – it is your liberty.
I am fully aware that we can change our circumstances – I am still alive, aren´t I 🙂
Changing my circumstances has meant changing how I am –
So, by getting to know myself very well and then working very hard in changing myself (15 years) and aligning myself with the SOURCE, I have found peace and beauty. Yes, it is literally REVOLUTIONARY, drastic and perhaps a bit rocky – Arriving to a Superior way of being in comparison to how _I previously was i.e. extreme violence to TRUE love and beauty, was not a soft process for me. I dare say, “waking up” and continuously doing so as a way of life, is not a soft process for anyone.
And I have always said that this process should be done and guided by a person who is kind and compassionate and gentle, as when someone is sharing their most intimate feelings, it can go either way. Unfortunately, I did not have this guidance and have had to learn the hard way. So, for the people that are going to do this, don´t forget to be gentle with yourselves. It compensates for the harsh environment out there.
So…now, I am able to positively manifest and project most of my environment – but only though a constant comunion with the Source. And when the bad times come, I am also peaceful as it is easier now. As I have to concentrate and put my energy there, more and more, I AM.
Lets lighten this up!!! Back to Scorpio traits…you know the ones who embrace their god like presence. Met another Scorpio today, why did i feel like i wanted to rip his clothes off?? whats with this magnestism? took me about an hour or so to soften him up and then he was putty in this leos hands!!!
pluto you are such a typical scorpio…i love it. I have decided not to feel such sadness i now have decided to embrace the scorpio male!!!
Hi Leonine,
MEEEOOOOWWW!!! 🙂
I certainly ‘can be’ the typical (or classic) male Scorpio:= Discerning. Penetrating. Explosive. Passionate. Sexual. Sensual. Complex. Withheld Energies. Kind. Sincere. Grounded. Charm. Dangerous.
However…
Aside from my apparent meanieness, I have alot of Sagittarian influence shining through my mind, heart and soul.
Sagittarius… is Leo’s fellow Fire sign. My Sun (core Identity) sits in the 9th House (Sags house) conjunct Venus (Woman Psyche & Money) and my North Node (Defined Life Purpose, Higher Mind, Spiritual Path).
Pluto, the Eternal Dark Daddy… holds Rulership over those 9th House planets.
Pluto’s natal position in my chart seethes in the 7th house (Libra’s House) of Partnerships which means all areas of Relating to “the other” and on all levels.
Scorpio ‘Sun’ nature can certainly diversify to greater degrees of human manifestation than that of the other 11 ‘Sun’ signs… depending on the specific positions of each planet percolating in each given sign, and their houses and aspects to other planets respectively.
With the Sun located in the other 11 signs, the degree of manifestation (or variety) based on a persons chart (or Nature), is not as drastic or volatile throughout a persons inner-evolution.
Of course, lets say for example a Leo or Capricorn Sun… with Scorpio Rising… that person will have many Scorpionic “depths”… however the Leo Sun or Cappy Sun will off-set that Pluto rising intensity through the NATURE of a Leo ego and a Cappy ego.
Each Sun sign, through my real world experiences… do indeed manifest differently. I’ve noticed very subtle, yet astonishing egocentric behaviors very True to each Sun sign. It’s all relative based on the mystical natal chart.
Evolutionarily speaking… “Classic” Scorpio is a Triplicity Sign, meaning Scorpion-Eagle-Pheonix (or Dove).
Most of the time during a male Scorpios life, we are fluctuating between all four levels of Consciousness. What is the reason for our volatility??… the answer is Mars.
Mars is the Warrior… both within us, and exerted outside of us. Our volatility is a reflection of the violent storms Mars is creating through our psyche, emotions and blood stream.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.
Scorpios are AT WAR within themselves. Especially me.
I was born with Mars (War, Assertion and Sexual Vitality) IN Scorpio, Mars’ natural ruler.
… And with all that intensity or volatility arrives tremendous social, sexual, psychological, financial, MORAL responsibility—> toward ones-self.
Integrity… Truth toward the Realism of ones devastations, evolve a fluid Character.
But an evolved Character requires Transcendent Self-Knowledge of ones Darkest Shadow and of ones Brightest Light.
Consciousness explodes from the deepest Truths of Raw-Life-Experience;)
If a Woman, wants to find Meaningful Rebirths in her life, she must learn to Surrender her deepest Fears to the Divine in a male.
The big question for her remains. What male? What does her mind, imagination, feelings and heart Project onto that male?
She’ll never “know” until she can see past her fearful emotional reality clearly through the passage of Death (Surrender of her ego).
Ahhh… I just committed plagiarism. Let’s try this again.
More about divine unions…P.Puppy already talked about Divine Masculine.
“When two become one in a divine sacred union many challenges are faced for release immediately. A Sacred Divine Woman, sanctified pure and cleared for service, is of such purity one has to truly bring into the awareness, the nature of pure divinity and the lack of experience any of us here have with it in this lifetime. This is the nature of recollection to our inner most sensitivities. The Empowered Divine Woman has inner sensitivities, which are of the highest priority for the Empowered Divine Man. If the empowered divine man cannot surrender his lack of conscious awareness for these sensitivities, the empowered man will do drastic harm to his beloved. This is by no means allowable, acceptable, or tolerable by any standards in any measure of worth.
When any matter concerning the sacredness of Divinity, which ALL divine feminine carries in her essence, it is to be honoured in the highest of degrees, no matter the shared experiences levels of harmony or joy.
When one, any one of us can accept the other fully as the other is, then we can begin to see clearly our reflections of divinity. We can connect with our own divinity for the imperfections we are while incarnated. The entire understanding of Relationship Harmony is a particular interest one may wish to influence his or her life with, by meditating with this matter in ones focus for the meditation. With the knowledge our Angels and higher aspects send to us in our meditation with this, will provide anyone who seeks a divine relationship of authenticity, as it is in heaven.”
My personal Bible. Formless and Eternal.
*) Everything we say or do has the nature of mind, and mind takes the lead. If one speaks or acts with a negative intention, suffering follows him, as the wheel follows the foot of the ox that draws the cart.
*) The wicked people mourn in this world, and they mourn in the next; they mourn in both. They mourn and suffer when they see their misdeeds.
*) The righteous people delight in this world, and they delight in the next. They delight and rejoice when they see their good deeds.
*) Let him admonish, let him teach, let him forbid what is improper. He will be respected by the good, and he will be hated by the bad.
*) Three things cannot be long hidden: The Sun, The Moon, and The Truth.
*) Peace comes from within, do not seek it from outside.
*) Better a thousand hollow words is one word that brings peace.
*) Friendship is the only cure for hatred, the only guarantee of peace.
*) Those who are free of resentful thoughts surely find peace.
*) You only lose what you cling to.
*) Just as treasures are uncovered from the earth, so virtue appears from good deeds, and wisdom appears from a pure and peaceful mind.
*) To walk safely through the maze of human life, one needs the light of wisdom and the guidance of virtue.
*) Envy, hatred, and illusion are the roots of evil. To be free of these is the root of good.
*) Commit no wrong, cultivate the good, and purify one’s mind.
*) To depend on others for salvation is negative, but to depend on oneself is positive.
*) Just as a mother would protect her only child with her life, even so let one cultivate a boundless loving-kindness towards all beings.
*) Standing, walking, sitting or relaxing, as long as he is awake, let him develop the mindfulness, which is a Noble Living.
*) Everything we say or do has the nature of mind, and mind is the Master. If one speaks or acts with a positive intention, happiness follows him, like a shadow that never leaves him.
*) Our mind, not our body, is who we really are. If our mind is loving and peaceful, we will become stronger and wiser, even if our bodies have difficulties.
*) Mind is one’s foe and best friend. Destroy the passions of lust, hatred, and ignorance that reside in one’s mind by morality, mindfulness and wisdom.
*) Blaming our misfortunes on others will end up causing more injury to us. Accepting the misfortunes forces us to take responsibility for correcting past mistakes and preventing them from being repeated.
*) Hatred does not end by hatred, hatred ends by loving-kindness.
*) There is the incredible wisdom that lies at the heart of the attitude of loving-kindness.
*) It may not be easy to maintain and generate loving-kindness in the face of aggression, but it is the most worthwhile approach, which creates the least harm and heals the damages from past ills.
*) He who lives seeking pleasures only, his acts uncontrolled, immoderate in his food, idle, and weak, Mara (the tempter) will surely overthrow him, like the wind throws down a feeble tree.
*) He who lives without seeking pleasures, his acts well controlled, moderate in his food, faithful and strong, Mara will certainly not be able to overthrow him, because the wind could not throw down a rocky mountain.
*) As rain penetrates into a badly-roofed house, lust breaks through a polluted mind.
*) As rain does not penetrate into a well-roofed house, lust will not break through a well-developed mind.
*) As the bee gathers honey and goes without injuring the flowers or its color or fragrance, so let a good man goes about a village.
*) Not the faults of others, not what they have done or left undone should a good man pay attention to. One should not try to find others’ faults intentionally. By getting rid of the habit of fault-finding, one cuts off a source of defilement.
*) Like a beautiful flower, full of bright colors, but without fragrance, are the boastful and fruitless words of him who does not act accordingly.
*) Like a beautiful flower, full of brilliant colors and full of fragrance, are the sincere and fruitful words of him who acts accordingly.
*) The fragrance of flowers does not travel against the wind, but the pleasing and harmonious atmosphere of a good man travels even aginst the wind; a good man pervades every place.
*) How is there laughter, how is there joy, as life is always suffering? Why do you not seek a light, you who are shrouded in darkness?
*) This body is wasted, weak, a nest of disease; this heap of corruption breaks into pieces, life indeed ends in death. The brilliant chariots of kings wear away; in the same way, the body becomes old, but the virtue of good people knows no age, thus do the good say to the good.
*) A man who is lazy and has learnt little, grows old like an ox, his flesh grows but his wisdom does not grow.
*) A man with polluted mind indulges in bad habits. A wise man regards diligence as a supreme treasure.
*) Through effort, diligence, discipline, and self-control, the wise man makes himself as an island that cannot be overwhelmed by a flood.
*) By oneself alone is misdeed avoided; by oneself alone is one purified.
*) Even the gods envy those who are awakened and mindful; who practice meditation and contemplation; and who are carefree in a simple life.
*) No matter what the problems are, meditation and mindfulness are the solution.
*) True and lasting inner peace can never be found in external things. It can only be found within in. And then, once we find and nurture it with ourselves, it radiates outward.
*) Happy in this world is non-attachment.
*) If a traveller does not meet with one who is equal or his better, let him continue to tread alone on the virtuous path. There can be no wicked friends. (A Chinese proverb: Rather go without than have something of bad quality.)
*) Even for a moment, if a man of intelligence associates with a wise man, he quickly comprehends the Truth, as the tongue senses the flavor of a soup.
*) A man who committed misdeeds must repent for wrongdoing, and the reward of which he receives crying with a tearful face.
*) A man who performed good deeds without attachment does not repent, and the reward of which he receives bringing peace of mind.
*) As long as the misdeed done does not bear fruit, the deceitful person thinks it is like honey; but when it ripens, then he suffers grief.
*) If you see an intelligent man who detects faults and blames what is blame-worthy, follow that wise man as though he were a revealer of hidden treasures. (Note: It is permissable to use harsh words or even tough actions in order to save people from hurting themselves, but we must never do it out of hatred or anger.)
*) Do not have wicked people for friends, do not have people of bad quality for friends; have virtuous people for friends, have people of good quality for friends. If you choose to have wicked people for friends, you should try to reform them. (Note: Be cautious in your social life. Choose friends who uplift and inspire you to do your very best.)
*) It is difficult to control the mind, which is swift and apt to change on whatever it pleases. A controlled mind yields true happiness.
*) Like irrigaters guide the water, fletchers (who make arrows) bend the arrow; wise people straighten themselves.
*) As a solid rock is not shaken by the wind, wise people remain unshaken amidst blame and praise.
*) Wise people, after listening to the laws, become serene like a deep, clear and still lake.
*) There is no suffering for him who treads on the virtuous path and abandoned grief; who has freed himself on all sides and removed obstacles.
*) He, who rightly knows and is wholly freed perfectly peaceful, is calm in his mind, his speech and his action.
*) Even though a speech can be composed of a thousand words but without sense; one word of sense is better, which if a man hears and becomes quiet.
*) Though one conquered in battle field a thousand times and a thousand men, yet he who conquers himself is the greatest conqueror.
*) Even a wrong-doer sees happiness as long as his misdeed has not ripened; but when his misdeed becomes ripened, then the wrong-doer sees sorrows.
*) Even a good man suffers as long as his good deed has not ripened; but when his good deed becomes ripened, then the good man sees true happiness.
*) Think not lightly of misdeed, saying, “it will not come to me.” Even a water pot is filled by the falling of water-drops. In the same way, the fool fills himself with misdeed by gathering it little by little.
*) Think not lightly of good deed, saying, “it will not come to me.” Even a water pot is filled by the falling of water-drops. Likewise the wise man fills himself with merits by gathering it little by little.
*) Whoever causes harm to a good, pure, and innocent person, that misdeed falls back upon that fool, like light dust thrown up against the wind.
*) Act quickly in doing good deeds; restrain your mind from negative thoughts; for whoever delays in doing good deed delights in misdeed.
Thank you Pluto, this offered me a sense of peace that i am true to myself….looking forward to the good!!!
Thanks Leonine, I’m happy you received something meaningful from it.
So much for my cyber hog policing… haha… I’m breaking just about every rule there is regarding those porky cyber initiatives I wanted to refrain in the first place.
Oh well, generally I wouldn’t decide to share my stuff on here if I did not feel it could be benefit others.
Thank you Pluto Puppy, I can see that you are truly an evolved Scorpio.
Channelled by me.
In the world, there are 5 races. One of them sybolizes True Power.
True power is only obtained through SUBMISSION.
The reason for all difficulties in life is very simple…
You have to learn.
Some lessons are harder than others. Learning essentially, to cause no harm in this visible world, under any circumstances, will allow you to have access to what is invisible.
While you can feel how you want (it) to be and align your will with the divine, you will get there. Learn the lessons on the way. All is ENERGY…submit your will to the divine energy of the moment. Not knowing or doing this, will take you down a turbid path.
There is nothing stronger…than divine will burning in the heart of a person, in which the properties of magnetism and electricity are mastered.
So fight your battles, and fight them like you have a legion behind you, giving you their strength. For you surely do.
Everyday, I channel more and more…and I am humbled.
Hmmmm…that makes 2 of us. We´d both be arrested by the cyber hog police. I can hear the sirens already. ( LOL!!!)
I have meditated on your bible.
Oh well, since we are “going public” with SOME of our stuff…
Kanji hand signs 2 hours a day.
Greetings everyone:
I came by this lovely blog when searching for understanding from a confusing experience I just incurred with a Scorpio man. Before I share that, let me say how very interesting all these comments have been. Took me 2 days to read everything people have posted here. The deep spiritual, philosophical exchanges here could be made into a best seller book!
I am in 12 step recovery, which has taught me a great deal of spiritual insight and given me a higher power I call God. I make it a daily practice to include God in my life, or allow him to be included in my life, which is where he wishes to be, always. It is usually not so difficult as I pray and meditate daily deepening my connection, enhancing and gaining new wisdom daily.
Today, however, is a very down day for me and if you will indulge me this long post, I would like to share the experience in the hope I will find enlightenment and relief to my sore heart.
As so many others here have done, I joined a dating site a few months ago where I met a 50 yd old scorpion man, living in another state.I am 46, have not dated in a few years. A choice I made out of fear, having been in a unhappy marriage to an alcoholic.
This scorpion courted me just as all scorps do: over whelming intensity, deep philosophical connections, sarcastic, witty humor, numerous calls, texts, emails, IM chats. Felt very enveloped in his attention. He was open about his professional life, where is is somewhat known in is city. Sent me videos of him at public events (his occupation), so there was a good deal of candor. I, of course, being the warm, sunny Leo, opened up so much, feeling comfortable and trusting. He wasn’t so open, but did reveal a few personal matters.
After several weeks, I felt I needed to approach him on whether we were to meet or not. I emailed a very vulnerable letter saying what I wanted from life, love, a mate,family… not just an online dating pal and asked if he wanted to meet. We hat an IM chat about it, where he opened up about his recent divorce and certain past behaviors of womanizing and he wasn’t ready to fall in love, but asked if I would still maintain our friendship to see where it would lead, go slow. I agreed. He seemed hesitant to believe me, feeling insecure. Guess his trust issues were showing.
Shortly after, his child had an emergency requiring going out of town for several days and we didn’t speak. During that time, I saw his Face book page, which said his status was married. Upon his return, I confronted him and he admitted he was only separated, had a huge IRS lien and that he screwed up his business and that’s what ruined his marriage. He tried to justify that his divorce will be over soon, and that if our relationship had escalated further, he would have been divorced by that time. He was defensive and attacking me for looking into his background/ I realized I had shined a spot light into the dark cavern of the Scorpio and his natural reaction was to attack back, to remove the spot light on his actions.
Eventually, he took responsibility and apologized and I forgave him with no problem. Why? Because I had done the same thing 10 years ago when I was separated, not divorced, but said I was to a new love interest. I understood where he was coming from.
While we forgave each other and agreed to continue the friendship, something in him changed. During the week following, he emailed me asking to have an online chat, but he didn’t show up for it. No call, text. Silence. I texted next day asking about it, he apologized, said he feel asleep, and would chat that night.Again, same thing. We had several weeks of daily communication of calls, texts, emails, chats. Now, it was drying up and some game was being played.
He emailed again for a chat, making no excuse or reference to the 2 previous cat/mouse game. I replied to his request agreeing, yet once again, he was a no show, and totally silent. Finally, I had enough, and realized this was a game of some sort, and I was done playing. I texted him a message saying I knew he was seeking to alienate me and it was over. No reply.
Two days later he sends me an email saying he is going through some issues which are irrelevant and not my problem, wishing me the best, saying how marvelous and sexy I am, and all that good, cold stuff.So, I realized that it was his way of pushing me away, but am really shocked because he was a good communicator, at least in writing, and had not seen any signs of manipulation. I did see jealously, possessiveness, fear of vulnerably, but nothing cold like this. I feel so confused and that is an awful place to be. I do know he does have significant personal issues with an addicted child, pending divorce, and an eviction. Many personal delimmas. I am just hoping to find some understanding of why the push away game? Was it he felt he couldnt trust me after I confronted about the married/divorce issue? Or because he knows his life is unmanagable and doesnt want to bring me into it? I really was intending to be just a friend, and not place any further demands on him. We had such a lovely interaction, and as with most women who encounter a scorpio, am left feeling numb.
I will recover from this, I have God and forgiveness. I just dont have the answer to…..why?
I appreciate all insight…..blessings.
hi. maybe you wanted more than he was willing/able to give and when he sensed that he backed away. he wasnt convinced of his ability to be completely honest with you.
the possible outcome of such honesty may not have eventuated into anything at all.
Hi Leo Lady
I am also a leo lady and i had to reply to you because this was exactly the same scenario i was involved in with a scorpio male on the internet. 18 months of conversations, opening up on personal levels, talking of love and a future together etc etc, texts, emails,phonecsalls, didnt want to lose me no matter what. I too had an inkling that something was up, mainly because one morning he asked me to phone him and he happened to answer at home (his marital home) and sounded out of sorts, although he was the one who asked me to contact him. It felt awkward, like i was invading his life. Then i started to uncover a series of online flirtations with women in virtual worlds and fetish sites and i confronted him about it (well it turned nasty), so yes it seemed like he pushed the blame on me and coldly said that he wanted me to get on with my life because i am young and beautiful and dont need to hang around waiting for him to get his life together!!!
So yes i have the same question as you, why? The forgiveness i am still working on because i feel that as such an unevolved scorpio he has messed around with my life, my emotions and certainly my self esteem. I went from feelings of rejection, wasted time and effort in maintaining the balance with him and my confidence has hit rock bottom. This happened 6 months ago and i dont really see it easing for me yet. I have lost a lot of trust in men and this has totally destroyed me. I am looking for some kind of mind overhaul, so i stop thinking about his motives and why he could have been so cruel to have left me hanging on for so long. The forgiveness part at the moment is way back as i feel his destructive and egotistical nature is wrecking a lot of peoples lives by his false promises and his musings about meeting up when i dont believe he even follows it through. So i try my best to imagine his wasted years spent on the internet constantly trying to conjure up new relations to fulfill his esteem issues, as well as something lacking so much in his life that he needs to have these loose connections than experiencing the essence of true love or at least working on his marriage. I dont know, all i know is that constant thought and dread is no good for my soul. I still believe he will get in touch (although i doubt he will after the crossing of words) i still believe he is in cyberspace searching for his next fix and i am trying to distract myself and not beating myself up about it.
Hmmmm…
“Why?” or wanting an explanation for his actions may not be really the right course of action. The reason is that knowing his truth or not knowing it…
…should not affect your own BEING and who you are.
Who we are must endure the good and the bad, the male and the female, the heaven and the hell, the knowing and the not knowing, the known and the unknown…the insults and the complements…arriving from
Polarities to Unities, from the depths to the peaks.
You gave that away, when it should have been your first priority.
I could not be interested in an explanation from a person and allow that to change my state of being. Why be appeased by an illusion? There is no BEING and therefore, no truthful ACTION. The seed is empty and the fruit will be as well. It will eventually collapse. Especially under the weight of truth.
I can understand the soulful intention to improve oneself, and under that context, ALL IS ACCEPTABLE. So…Don´t attach strings on a PUPPET.
When you give, you give. When you love, you love. When you ARE, you ARE.
In the end, when 2 people work on BEING, no explanations are necessary. Why? Because that person IS. What are you going to say to the person? Instead of “WHY DID YOU DO THAT?” You would ask “WHY DID YOU BE THAT?”
So…LET THE PERSON BE (who he really is, even if it is not to your liking)
So, that being said, don´t give up on loving Scorpios…just give up the part where you gave up on loving and truly being yourselves.
So, it would seem that there is more to BEING than sharing and having good intentions.
Well yes, and you are experiencing it, as it comes to surface. The frustration, the sadness, the anger, the deception…
All of these have come to be released through BEING. So face yourselves and try your best to heal. Let the LOVE energy be your guide.
It is such a beautiful world. I am presently near the Atlantic ocean on the other side of the continent. The skies are blue and the days are warm. Can you feel the heat of the sun? It is in you too.
Radiate your warmth in your daily living and healing the depths of your own “unknown”. Understand that it is something that has to be done by you. Don´t ask “WHY?”…ask “HOW?”.
The answer is in you. YOU ARE the answer. BE it.
Thank you to Uumm, Leonine and gabutela:
I have read all of your posts and you have much experience, strength and hope to share and I thank you for sharing with me.
I have to agree with Uumm that indeed, I think this gentleman did care for me, however, under the weight of his current dilemmas he was/is unable to be an active member of a union with me. I just wish he had the emotional ability to either stay in the friendship as he asked, or ability to communicate why he could not. To be left in such an underhanded, manipulative way is painful. I do not think he is of the caliber that cyber scorpio that played Leonine for so long. And btw, dear Leonine, I am so sorry for your pain, I do feel I know it a bit myself. The scorpio man is so intoxicating, much like a pull into an emotional vortex of lust and love. Please take care of your gentle self.
This gentleman revealed enough to me to verify his identity, so I do not believe he is a shady character. As is the age of he internet, I did my own research to assure myself this person wasn;t a criminal or otherwise unsuitable. I did see many of his legal/financial troubles there, so the pain he must be going through is valid.
After he told me he was not legally divorced yet, I asked why he decided to join a dating site. His reply: “Thats the million dollar question”. Seems he is so not in touch with his own being, he makes choices that are not in tune to his well being. He, like me and all of us, want to be loved and in a together union. Thats why I joined the dating site.
Sadly, his choice affected me. I, of course, have choices too. I will move on, and have learned a valuable lesson in moving oh so slowly with internet dating, rely more on telephone communication rather than online, and make a decision early in the “getting to know you phase” as to what his intentions for his life are romantically and if they do not match with mine, to exit before feelings are too connected.
I have to say I would be very hesitant to date another scorpio. I dated one years ago, for just 6 weeks, and though he wasnt as intoxicating as this man, he was arrogant and stung me hard. I hate to lump all people of a certain sign in a negative light, and I will try not to, but this experience has made an impact on me.
Gatubela:
Your spiritual insight and advice is deep, maybe too deep for even me, though I have 22 years of spiritual growth. I do understand what the solution is to recover from this pain and to heal, though it does take time. First time to feel the pain and confusion, Time to practice accepting the outcome as it is, not as I had wished to be. Time to take active action to heal. Today, here in America is Thanksgiving day, where normally I would be happy and enthuiastic to join my family. Instead I woke up to sadness, emptiness and depression. Feelings that I am normally and thankfully, no longer accustomed to. I only wanted to sit in my sadness, and I did for hours.
Later, though through prayer I asked God to help me walk through it, and I gathered the strength to get up and put one foot in front of the other. I went to my brothers home were I experienced what I consider the hand of God.
I had been so wanting to cry to relieve the pent up confusion and pain, but was unable to do so. I felt emotionally frozen, what a terrible way to be. I saw my 23 year old niece, a lovely woman of grace and feeling (also a Leo). She is covered in tattoos. I asked if she had any new ones. She gently lifted her skirt to reveal a very large tattoo of the only hero I have had in my life….my late mother, her Grandmother. She took a photo of my mother who died in June 2009, and had it permanently embedded into her body as a memorial to her. The tears came, softly and slowly, and I hugged her, though I couldnt speak initially, he felt my gratitude and honor.
I know that was God speaking through her to me, saying “Everything will be alright, you will grow through this and blossom”.
3 Lion ladies sharing their worlds. Cute.
I found the following part very telling, Leonine.
“….. so yes it seemed like he pushed the blame on me and coldly said that he wanted me to get on with my life because i am young and beautiful and dont need to hang around waiting for him to get his life together!!!……”
From a deep spiritual perspective Leonine, consider that specific ‘response’ to you as a cutting blessing from above.
*- You only lose what you cling to -*
Brand that psychology deep into your heart.
Killing (surrendering) the ego was never meant to be easy. It requires death first.
So true PP, so true. What we resist, shall persist. When we fight, we lose. When we surrender, we win,
This is a spiritual axiom. (truth)
When I was so bitterly resentful towards my ex alcoholic husband for lying cheating, stealing and eventually abandoning our 12 yr old son, I hated him with such a vengence. BUT…and important factor…I did not want to be labeled one of those women who lived to hate their ex. I did not want to be on the tv show “Snapped”, where real life females are documented on why they snapped and killed their spouse, lover etc. So, in this case, my EGO served a form of purpose. To motivate me to change, to let go, to heal. I was damned determend to be something other than what I was. And I have MORE that succeeded. I have no animosity towards that man despite his abandonment of our son for these last 7 years.
I forgive because I love ME, I value ME, I need ME.
And I will forgive this scorp, and move on. Im feeling better already as I have processed this through my recovery friends and am seeing him in a new light. A light of his pain that is hurting him, and the light of God, who says he isnt a bad man, just a wounded man.
And dear puppy…I think you are cute too. 😉
Each of us has ego. We human beings need it to flourish in a world of survival. Yet treading water in an “infintile” ego… exacerbated in full grown “men” (aka, a baseless ego) is not Purified or Justified.
A man who is full of vice:-alcoholism, drug addiction, money addiction, women addiction, status symbol addiction, gambling or passivity addiction, cynicism and cowardly act addiction… is a man… living through… his own MYTH.
I call it Illusion.
Blown up ‘words’ alone… are without virtue. Because a male’s DEEDS do not follow his words.
That reality is the norm out there. We must anticipate that Hypocrisy, or one will become blind-sided by the impact of Truth, later on.
That’s why nothing (unconciously)thought, said or acted upon in our lives, should be taken for granted.
Every molecular ounce of our very Being… must emerge the Walk behind the Talk… and with serene humility.
We must always keep our eyes and hearts open, regardless of the corruption we see in others (or ourselves).
P. Puppy,
I appreciate your “cowardly act addiction” comment, and the actions not matching the words statement. I do feel this is what occured with me, when this man could not come to me and tell me why he wanted to end our friendship. Instead, he played the manipulative game of “Lets chat/no show” – in essence to push me away. His actions did not match his words, for the first time, and I was watching very closely.
When living in the disease of alcoholism, I saw that daily. Words being promised, actions never matching them. Thats what determines a persons integrity. I made sure to watch this interaction with this man from day one to see if he was true, and he was, up until one week ago, when the cat-mouse game began. It was no coincidence it occurred immediately after our run in over the fact his marital situation came to light. I dont think scorpions like to have people look into their background then shine a light on them.
I sincerely suspected he would never trust me again for all I have read on scorpions, trust is so obsessively needed. I cannot say I am sorry for having looked to confirm he was married, and if that means the friendship ended, it is what it is.
I did wake up today with another great sadness.
and so I pray to be relieved of it.
Hi Lady Leo,
Those “life experiences”. They just “keep on coming”!!! LOL!!!
I can see your determined spirit and the love in you.
I am going to suggest something that may not be to your liking. But it is so that you can have a more complete healing.
What you are, is what you see…and will react to.
If you are able to identify him as being wounded, then it is what you may react to.
If you see corruption all around you, you may react to that as well.
This is very fundamental to our process of healing as we start to become complete, we are able to identify with more and more things.
Reacting to “woundedness” may not offer the best foundation for your healing. Tranforming “woundedness” into understanding may be better. And, of course, as we start embarking on these journeys, we begin to perceive more and more and therefore, raise the frequency and purity of our thoughts.
So, for me, I would see this person as “part of me”. We are all one. His pain is my pain, his Hades…is my Hades. His happiness, is my happiness. His choices, are my choices. And vice versa.
Two people BEING, become ONE. I have learnt that this applies to groups as well.
So, if at the moment, you are seeing him under the light of God, and he is a good person and wounded, when you are ready, ask yourself, “WHAT AM I NOT SEEING?”.
When you see people as being divine, this for me, is the best scenario to react to. It is a rocky path because our own healing starts to take priority. There are many deep issues on various levels of ourselves, that need to come up.
If you are reacting to other things, be gentle with yourself as this is part of you. You are absolutely free to make your choices in this matter. Feel free and loved, as the path unfolds itself.
As P.Puppy said, we must keep our eyes and hearts open – the extra spiritual growth comes when we ask ourselves these questions and try to understand ourselves better.
Lady Leo,
I see things which are/were veiled. Your innocence didn’t want to acknowledge the harsh reality of it (even though you’re 46).
“…. I made sure to watch this interaction with this man from day one to see if he was true, and he was, up until one week ago, when the cat-mouse game began….”
I will say this… through hidden caverns of my psychology. The “Origins” of his Deceit… little Leo… were Right There Amid You– from the very Beginning. He “always Was that guy.”
He didn’t just pop into betrayal mode for the sake of destroying any trust you had. … Ya see?
I’ve said it before on a previous post. Leo reality ** Trusts Everyone ** (at first). That naivety darling can (and has) devoured your Heart, Hope and Idealism… because the ‘fixed attachment’ in your Trusting, was not HONORED by that male in which you openly entrusted. Welcome to the real world of pain and obstacle baby.
I want to be gentle with you when I say this. You shared this at the end of your post…
” … I did wake up today with another great sadness.
… and so I pray to be relieved of it.”
Everything you feel as a Burden of Sadness… is happening because you are HOLDING ON to those experiences. You’re Not moving forward emotionally or psychologically. Hanging on to the past can swallow the happiness and peace of mind we yearn for.
I personally know one Leo girl-friend, age 30, she’s a dietition, Very attractive gal… she was in a relationship with a Gemini guy (who I also know) for a while but they split-up about 18 months ago. Last week I saw her at a social bar we commonly hang out at. After some small talk, I asked her about her renewed sense of life being a single lion again. She replied with despondency. Her face long, her exterior stone dead. She had STILL NOT GOTTEN OVER this dude… (who in my world, was nothing but a superficial joker.) Sure.. he made her laugh. Sure, he fed her great needs for meaningless attention and praise. Great. But the substance of their “Love” (to me) was literally… A Joke.
Yet 18 months later… there she was EMOTIONALLY ‘hanging on’ to an experience which could have TAUGHT her something about her SUBJECTIVE feelings of ATTACHMENT.
I asked her why she still lives in the past. She couldn’t answer me. Her entire life was affected as a result of her despondancy. Her inner worlds where wasting away and stagnating her growth.
The major life Lesson in the Leo psyche is… to learn the social and relational brilliance of their opposite sign (Aquarius) who are terrific at social and relational OBJECTIVITY.
Force yourself to “Detach from that reality” Lady Leo, like an Aqaurian would do. You need it. For personal growth and most importantly… for Inner Peace.
Leave sadness behind for what it is:- An Experience (to learn from).
Love Pluto;)
Pluto,
You could not be more right about my Leo naitivete (sp), it has always been a character trait that has served me poorly. I trust too often, too soon, which is why I tried to be cautious this time. Really see if his actions matched his words, really listen to what was being told to me.
I see that you think he was deceitful from the beginning, that I was being manipulated from the start, and that he did not go into betrayal mode just at the last week. Can you expound on that more? I really want to learn. What were the signs I may have missed?
Although I am typical leo, with my trusting nature and being naive, I am a very smart woman, with spiritual and emotional healing. Though my heart is hurt, it has only been 48 hours and I have no intention of remaining like our friend who suffers after 18 months. This is where my recovery program benefits me. I process my pain, work the 12 steps to heal. I have NO intention of sitting in the problem and full intention of living in the solution. Its just for today, it hurts. It fresh, its raw,and I am feeling the feelings.
I am also going to daily 12 step meetings, calling people for nurturing and guidance, spending time with my son and friends. I am “living thru it”. One day at a time.
Please do share you insight on how he was a deceitful guy so I can learn and know how to identify those actions in future. Thank you!
Well, human behavior isn’t easy to understand if one is not free of sadness, sorrow and illusion… in ones evolved Individualism first.
If I were to give you some guidelines to watch out for, they would be:
-) Don’t rush into ‘loving’ a male because of how he makes you feel. A woman may feel “comfortable” in her own skin while being with a male. However, Feelings you receive (about another) are not always TRUE. Feelings ‘can’ MISGUIDE us into mental habits of Hell… if we are not fully conscious (awake) of pain and bliss within our immediate reality.
-) In my world of people relating…. too much comfort, with too many warm n fuzzies happening in the EARLY going of a dynamic, mean… SUSPICION… to me. (It’s a Scorpionic thing that I’m sure most Scorpionic people ‘get’ what I saying).
-) Give the friend-relationship dynamic plenty of time to evolve. Understand a male’s higher-principles in life EARLY (if he has any to begin with) besides him saying “gotta find a good woman” or “getting married to the One” or “she has to be a good mother when we buy that charming little house together”… style of verbiage. Ya with me?
-) Pay ‘Intuitive Attention’ to a man’s behavior. Always Trust what negative or polluted behavior you feel in your heart. I’m talkin every move he makes. Every word he says. Every motivation behind his words and actions. Every choice he makes “to court you”… especially the choices he IS NOT sharing with you. Calmly Look for faults, but don’t try and change those faults in him. Ever. Just open your mind to WHO the guy REALLY is standing before you. But that assimilation of Truth takes TIME.
-) Learn to live your life with quality people, who you might not necessarily like… but whom you Respect and whom you might even feel afraid of.
-) Find the good in men. Qualities you Respect… but don’t constantly believe in outward appearances such as comments of success or money or honest gentleman facades… which he displays to the world.
-) Ask him point blank, what does he Value in his life BESIDES family and career?? Then WAIT ‘in silence’ for HIS ANSWER. Always look him directly in the eye and sense IF he genuinely Knows himself deeper than career, goals or social humor. The Character you’re “feeling for” or lack thereof, means a fundamental Integrity and/or opportunity for you to move on from him… or find out more about him.
-) Learn to cultivate happiness in Solitude without desire for a partner. God is within you. After our short life (70-85 yrs) here on earth, God want’s us to know what we have learned through Truth, Spirit and Soul. He want’s that Immortal response of What we ‘understand’ now in our current existence. We will always BE eternal and intimate with the Source itself… propelled into galaxies light years after our physical death.
Breathe with Mindfulness;)
Pluto WOW
Thats all i have to say…you have kind of defined my own being and my own way of dealing with emotions in the last two posts. I too feel the need to stay in the moment with someone and unable to feel the ability to move on. i have always loved the way aquarians can just live and let live and always joke that i am coming back as a scorpion or aquarian. You know the funny thing is i didnt want a partner, i wanted to grow with my scorpio. I wanted us to share experiences to allow each other to learn and teach but through honesty and not through betrayal. I wanted him as a friend, i wanted to bring happiness to his so called sad life but in the end he made me feel so lonely, so sad and totally zapped all my positive energy by taking every inch of hope and even fantasy from me and leaving me with devastation. So like your friend, i will wallow in it, i will push every man away who comes within an inch of me and i dont know how long it will take for me to get over it. However what i will take with me are lessons to not trust as deeply as i always do.My naivety has been my downfall but something that i am unable to change as it seems part of my makeup. Pluto in a lot of ways, the growth and learning was something similar to the advice you have provided. It is wholesome, thought provoking and it allows me to learn from others. Pluto i wonder if i could ask you, would you ever show any remorse for the things you have done, in terms of betrayal or how much hurt and upset you have caused someone. I would love to know your perspective on things, it helps me to heal and although you are not the guy i talk about, i feel like i could go deep enough to find all the answers i need to move on.
I just also wonder whether because of all the bad words there is some kind of remorse for the way he behaved or whether a scorpio will just shut it out and transmit the blame.
I wish i had met this guy when he was at your level, it would have been sweet and inspiring
Very insightful and useful suggestions, Pluto, thank you for all the effort in writing them out.
As a recovering codependent, my 12 step program, I came to realize long ago that my *addiction* is to relationships. First it was my alcoholic husband, which is the nature of alcoholic families. I got “lost” in his identity. Whatever he wanted, I wanted. His favorite food was my favorite food. His needs determined my needs. So, when he drank, I died. Emotionally because he could not fulfill my needs. I sought help, thru recovery, to regain my identity. I found “me” through my higher power, God.
I came to find out what I like, who I am, what I need and ceased seeking a man to supply that to me. I made a choice to work on recovering the me I lost, regaining my valuable self esteem, self worth and self love. It has been a hard, painful journey and I am at a place where I love who I am, I give back in service to the other women who come in to our fellowship so broken, so “attached” to their man (sometimes a parent or child)and that service helps me to remember where I never want to go again. Back to relationship addiction.
So, after having not dated for 5 years. Yes, 5 stupid years, I decided to put my big girl panties on, and find love again. So, although I am in sorrow at this “first time out” deal, I am not lost. I still have my identity, I do not feel as some other women who posted here that I will never get over this guy, or that my life is in ruins. Im just hurting. Im not dead emotionally. Just slightly wounded.
I realize my faults in this episode. I accept that anytime I am hurt, I have a part in it. When I saw his Facebook page that said he was married, it was still early in the game, I should have confronted him on it,but my denial said no, let him reveal it, be trusting. I didnt take into consideration that the more time I spent getting to know him, I was gaining more feelings for him.
I should also not have spent so much time in daily conversation/IM’s, without asking what kind of relationship he was seeking and was he committed to making a face to face visit. Knowing someones real intention and abilities while online, long distance dating is essential. As a rookie dater, I was just enjoying the courtship. Heart, before head. I have forgiven him, I just need to work on letting go and forgetting him, so that my heart can be open to receive the one that God has for me. Let go, Let God…
PS Pluto…I hope you know how important your role has been here, sharing your insight as an evolved scorpio male, in helping us ladies to process from our experiences with lesser evolved scorps.
It really helps to soothe and understand why they do what they do. Its just the same for me when I attend AA meetings, to understand why alcoholics do what they do that hurts others. It is not a permanent solution to change my problem, but much like a soothing, cool lotion on a painful sunburn. Thanks for sharing YOU with us.
hi leo lady
My biggest regret is i spent so much of my time in conversation with this guy but that was my choice! However the same was like you, i never questioned what his true intentions were, i let him talk about what our future would be but i suppose never questioned my own feelings in all of it. So when he became blase about the connection i started to speak out when u should have remained my true strong self at the beginning rather than allowing him to dictate the course of events, which in turn led to me becoming so deeply saddened.
So because of the time spent waiting for him to come online or waiting for messages by phone or text i didnt live and i am trying to get used to living again. The main thing is to start to make the best out of my life for me.
Exactly, Leonine…make YOURSELF a life…even when you do not feel like it, do it! Make friends, spend time with them, help others..you will receive a great gift of self esteem and self love. When we love ourselves, we attract people to love. The law of attraction says to put out to the universe what we want to receive. I believe this experience hapened for a reason. I will learn from it and make better choices as a result. I am proud of how I behaved with this man, I have no shame in how I presented myself. He taught me to show my vulnerability and even though I showed my hurt to him I am not ashamed. I was authentic and being me!!
“…Pluto i wonder if i could ask you, would you ever show any remorse for the things you have done, in terms of betrayal or how much hurt and upset you have caused someone…”
That’s a loaded and complex question Leonine. But I’ll try to answer it the best I can.
There have been tremendous changes through me as person from an 18 year old kid… til now age 36. I have always been an Introspective man… even up until my 32nd birthday. However… it has only recently, the last 4 years where I now vehemently EXPRESS what I see/feel, the multiple layers of human reality, it’s virtues and it’s cataclysmic lessons… based from a deep innate feeling (my Nature) from within-to-without. During my first 32 years of breathing, I was a bottled-up volcano of seething confusion/emotion. I didn’t know what to believe, who to turn to, who to trust, what structure I wanted to DO with my life, I had no structure, I was not awake to the addictions which poisoned any divinity that I once had as a young lad… and so forth.
Through SEEKING answers… in certain books, I began finding my True Identity. The out-of-control volatile volcano in mind and heart then began to sleep inside of me.
I had begun a spiritual quest to find the ability of my own intelligence and consciousness through the vehicle of reading. My intelligence and “difference” as a child, was ruthlessly humiliated and opressed while under the ignorant power and control of both my parents value systems. Their way of seeing the world/life was hammered and enforced into my heart and psyche. So just recently, 4 years ago, something spoke deep inside and told me to SEEK the TRUTH of your Existence.
Because up until that point in my life… life had been PAINFULLY MEANINGLESS to me.
My God-Given Will though, has never left me. It is that white-hot intensity (even in my writing you may feel it) of sensitivity to that I had felt through 12 years of Darkness (Unconscious Self-Destruction) and now, this same intensity has now FREED ME, of complex burdens… thanks to the incredible control God has bestowed upon my thoughts.
So to answer your question Leonine. I had indeed hurt people. I physically left my home and family for good. It was my destiny . There is nothing left to hear nor feel from my family in that past. Change has not become of them, the way I needed it to evolve for my life.
Regarding women? Yes, I’m sure that I “used to be” a terrible/kind/manipulative person. But that was then. This is now. I didn’t murder anybody. I Never hit a woman, I just always walked away. A large part of my Salvation during my Transformations was to heal. Heal me. Heal you and anyone who wants it, through a brave and zealous integrity.
My mind, heart and soul has been stretched Leonine. It will never return to it’s original dimension.
Thanks for asking a great question.
As Linda Goodman writes in our forum’s article… “Run ladies, as if King Kong were chasing you”… she was right, to certain degree. That is… partly right. haha.
I am no longer the insecure exploding beast of King Kong…
… I am now more like Batman… a dark, mysterious force who seeks vengeance (Justice & Salvation) over the pure evil in the world that once dominated his own reality.
Oh how life has changed;)
How do we single ladies find a brave Batman scorpio such as yourself?
Oh that is the question!
Seriously, Pluto, can you give a list of what “traits” of the unevolved scorpio male looks like so we can prepare our next encounter?
Leonine can give you the twisted traits from her encounters. They’re nothing extraodinary. Just stealthy lies.
The key is knowing when they are present in communication/behavior. Truth is often buried and concealed like dynamite. When you light it, all blows up in your face when you least expect it.
Not easy for an innocent Leo nature, I’m sure.
I really don’t like re-writing everything Leo Lady. You’ll find major dosage of what I’m about through all of my previous comments here on the forum.
And thanks for the Love. Right back at ya;)
“brave and zealous integrity”….
I LOVE that expression. So true….so very true. Integrity is the greatest gift bestowed upon me through my recovery. It is such an incredible feeling to feel proud of myself, to look at myself as a person of integrity and worth and value. So many years I was unaware that I lacked integrity. Didnt know what I didnt have.
How I knew I was gaining integrity was when people in my recovery community would compliment me on my honesty while sharing about my life’s ordeals. All the times I would lash out against the alcoholic, when I raged against him, I would come to my meetings and tell on myself, give all the details of my sins, and people would say my honesty was impressive, that although I was still acting without integrity, I was admitting it, and that is the first step to change.
I still have impure thoughts, to be sure, to act out against others and myself, but luckily, the behavior has changed. I sure wish to find a partner with at least equal integrity and vulnerability to share my life with. God’s time, not mine.
Haha thanks Pluto puppy i also followed Linda Goodmans book like a bible and i hav to admit the characteristics of each starsign are so accurate, to the point where i used a lot of the traits as experiments on the men!!
Some i got right and some i got wrong. The best book to find out the negative traits of a scorpio male is to read a book called ‘how to spot a ‘ba****d’ by his star sign. This helped me figure out what i was up against by defending my corner when consumed by an unevolved scorpio. It seems that without physically dying, he would never forgive me for my words! As well as it would probably take years to get through therapy and during this therapy i could encounter some of his other past loves as well his wife (although my situation wouldnt take shape quite like that)
The traits are quite varied as i always modelled a scorpio man on the many scorpio women i have in my life. I was wrong, two totally different characters. Scorpio women swear by honesty and although scorpio men do from their women, they can be hypocritical as they do not practice the same as they preach.
I am considering this type of attraction with a scorpion man if we had met in the physical sense, because quite clearly i would have eaten him for breakfast in the real life and i KNOW (ego aside) he would have been so deeply moved by me that he would not have reacted in this way towards me. However i was the same person inside and out, internet or no internet. He was consumed by alter ego and also by possibly a deep insecurity and lack of self worth used his magnetism to attract anything that had a pulse. You see he had no reason to follow things through, to meet or make the effort and also he could have a string of women, which allowed him to increase his feeling of belonging in this world because he was not prepared to grow on his own. Scorpions are rather negative individuals and they absolutely love the positivity of people. They are deeply secretive and it could take a lifetime to work them out. I was willing to spend my lifetime working together through this growth. I wanted us to project ourselves to each other in the night through spirituality. I wanted us to grow stronger and closer despite the distance, through means of meditation and other aspects to become one in a sense. I felt that this would have been a wondeful journey for both of us and also a connection that would surely stand the test of time (yes pluto i know you are probably thinking about my fantasy here)this was the disappointment because during the early stages, the connection was strong, it could be felt by me and even to the point where without physically meeting, he stood right next to me. I had the deepest respect for him and as confirmed he did for me. Our deep and meaningful conversations were wonderful, we would experience dreams that were the same, have the same illnesses at the same time and generally i felt so drawn to him on all levels even physically (although not in the physical way if you know what i mean)
So for me it was all such a waste, a waste of my own spiritual growth, as i felt that although i was moving forward in my own development, i had left him back on the path. He had reverted to stepping back onto his addictive nuances, while i was left trodden on and broken. So for a while i meditated to bring him back, to heal him, to make him see reason. I told him that all he had to do was leap back and i would promise he would never need to fight for anything again. He never responded, it became negative, the guy who i had met all that time ago, who i had helped change from the stern and controlling man i first met to a sensitive and gentle soul, had decided he could not continue that way…what could i do? I did all that i could. So the remorse i wanted him to feel, he did not feel because he would have swallowed his pride and tried to make it right.
Could i ask what are peoples opinions on past lives? Do you believe we have soulmates from past lives and ones that are so strong that you are unable to shift in this one?
I am currently working on my own intuitive ability, the one which brought me to finding out the truth. But i strongly believe he is fixed somewhere with me before, otherwise i would have not felt such a close connection. So the hours that were spent trying to work out the whys, is now kind of working out to be how i can go forward myself in life.
If thats your age pluto, it means i have another year to go before i reach my peak!!
thanks for you loving guidance and yes leo lady you know it is great to have pluto to flirt with!!
“… The best book to find out the negative traits of a scorpio male is to read a book called ‘how to spot a ‘ba****d’ by his star sign…”
Don’t read that rubbish… Or at least don’t beleive it as if were gospel.
That goes for anyone interested in learning about “the Sacred and Ancient Language of Symbols”… also known as)—- Astrolgy. I’m serious.
You’re assimilating “cookbook entertainment” Lady Leo. Fodder. That’s it. Those types of astrology books are misguided, obtuse and inane… they exist ONLY for the reason to SELL YOU… a laugh or two. They have influenced your thinking and understanding already. I can see it.
Here you wrote… ( btw, I’m just pointing out something important for everyone to know)
…I was wrong, two totally different characters. Scorpio women swear by honesty and although scorpio men do from their women, they can be hypocritical as they do not practice the same as they preach…”
No. THAT, is bullshit. I mean what I say. I speak from raw life SOCIAL experience with both male Scorpio Sun and female Scorpio Sun.
A female Scorpio is without Soul. At least in the sense… she will NEVER OPENLY discuss her life here on a harmless forum like this. You’ll NEVER SEE… 3… that’s right 3…. female Scorpios SHARING their WICKED, LOCKED UP AGENDAS here to the world… in the way you 3 Leo Suns have graciously done.
So don’t tell yourself a female Scorpio is Honest?… LOL!!… Damn!! … IF she WERE honest… we would be INTERACTING with such a soul right here – right now. But are we? LoL.
They ‘can’ be… no word of a lie… the most cruel… detached…. NIHILISTIC… people you’ll ever experience. You must experience their moves to understand me. A male Scorpio Evolves, at least to a certain degree, BECAUSE… he at least carries IN him, A CONSCIENCE.
Female Scorpios are without conscience.
That’s the last I have to say about this topic;)
Darling Pluto…I so love your passionate reply, alas, it was misdirected to me, when it was leonine who made those statements, not I.
😉
I have only one female scorpio friend who I used to work closely with in 12 step work. She was passionate in her resentments towards those she loved and hurt her; had left her husband but took over 7 years to divorce him due to her intense attachment to the *family*, has a fabulous sense of humor. I cannot say that she is dishonest, I have not seen that side of her, but I do consider her evolved ad deeply spiritual.
We are all a work in progress, eh?
And Truth be told… Linda Goodman has Never Attempted to Love a Female Scorpio in a close, very close… integrity-bound, intimate and passionate union.
Unless Linda was a lesbian. Which I doubt. She’s dead now anyway to ask.
I have attempted to Love the “femme fatal.” And I have failed more than once to know.
Linda Goodman’s perceptions should not influence anyone here, same with many other astrology authors.
Yes she hits on a few “grains” of truth in her experience… yet they are horribly subjective in terms of deep, intimate relating with a female Scorpio.
now ‘that’s all’ I have to say;)… guess I couldn’t help myself.
Ah crap… my mistake Lady Leo … no bad intent toward any of you;)
I’m being objective about a subjective eperience(s).
Hi Pluto Puppy,
I’ve been fascinated reading your posts today, and though this thread is a few months old, as a highly evolved female Scorpio, I feel compelled to comment on your views about us. In fact, I wish I had discovered this topic earlier as I would have been only too happy to jump in and share my wicked, locked up agenda with the famous brutal honesty we Scorpios are known for. 😉
First let me say that you write beautifully. Your words captured the very essence of what life’s journey should be, and it spoke to my soul on a level I have never before experienced. You have articulated every belief and truth I hold dear in a way I never could, with a clarity and honesty that are both refreshing and utterly enthralling. Your passion for spiritual understanding and evolution comes across loud and clear, as does your desire to achieve a transcendent union with the greater consciousness, but I admit, your passionate disdain for the females of your sign, is a curious paradox, though I sense it comes from the painful and unfortunate experiences you alluded to.
I will say that though I know only two other Scorpio females, they are much like myself, and happily there is not a gray lizard among us. My entire life, I have been driven by a need to nurture, protect and cherish my loved ones, I have no enemies because I do not hurt people, and I have surrendered to my chosen mate heart and soul, complete with all my Plutonic passion and strength. I met my Pisces husband when I was eighteen and we have been married for almost nineteen years, the foundation of love, respect, compassion and understanding was there the moment I first looked into his eyes, and it has never wavered. He has followed me to the underworld and back, and like the Phoenix, when the time comes to reinvent some aspect of myself, he gives me the freedom to explore even the darkest reaches, patiently waiting while I succumb to the flames, re-emerging from the ashes one step closer to understanding myself and universal truths, and he is there with open arms to welcome me back from the abyss. I have never cheated, never even thought about it, and there have never been lies, head games or manipulations, as I detest all of these things from the depths of my soul. Am I a private person? Am I a feisty spirit who loves to debate and stand up for what I believe in? You bet! However, when you truly find a soul mate, be it a lover or a friend, the connection allows you to communicate on a level that lays your soul bare. There can be no secrets because you both see the eternal truth in each other, and this is something that renders mere words and actions irrelevant. This is why I believe that Scorpios are very selective about who they associate with, because it is only this kind of bonding that holds any true meaning for us. Though not nearly as eloquent as your explanations, it is the best way I know how to say it.
To say that ALL female Scorpios do not have a conscience is closed minded in the extreme to be honest, and a complete contradiction to all your philosophies about higher consciousness, greater consciousness, and universal love. Every sign will present individuals who are “bad” or “evil’, and in fact, some of the worst Scorpios in history have been of the male variety, i.e., Charles Manson. As a Scorpio yourself who seems to understand the dualistic nature of human beings, i.e, we are both male and female, and one who thinks so highly of Scorpio males, I find it fascinating that you would assume NONE of your sisters can channel Pluto’s energy as well or better than our brothers. Our sign is unquestionably one of extremes, but if you agree our true spiritual quest is about embracing love, tolerance and altruism, then you should also see that hatred and intolerance in any form moves you further away from that goal. Though I do believe that hatred is but an extension of love, the negative pole perhaps, it is only when you understand and embrace that, and refuse to be controlled by the negativity, that you can truly be free to merge with the higher plane of existence if you will.
That said, my own spiritual path has been a life long journey of self-discovery, esoteric study, and years of learning how to control my inner demons. I am by no means perfect or never suffer from anger, or feelings of hatred and revenge. However, I have learned not to act on those feelings, but rather seek solace in my cave (yes we females DO have them), sometimes foray to the underworld, and emerge only when I can let the negative thoughts and forces go, and see the other person as a soul that simply vibrates to a different energy. At that point, I decide whether I can find some way to coexist with that person peacefully, and embrace them for who they are, or cut them out of my life because I know they will not appreciate or understand me. If there is no spiritual benefit to the relationship, or reciprocity, then it’s not meant to be in my opinion.
Well, there is a quick overview of my feelings on the subject, though I suspect you will disagree with much of what I’ve said, and will welcome your comments. I am also quite willing to lay my soul bare here, and will answer any questions you have openly and honestly. So if you do happen to read this, and want to call me out on anything…Bring it on brother! :p
Take care! 😉
I am happy for you Phoenix.
Regarding the female Scorpio in general?… Well, you’re the exception out there, but not the rule.
You’re happily married to a Pisces nature. How rocky and turbulent could ‘that’ possibly be?? LoL.
I know many a Pisces nature. Pisces are far too kind, wise and Understanding of people to extract any hidden fears, motives or compulsions out of another.
My comments were about the ‘single’ female Scorpio.
That woman, carefully weaves and abuses her psycho-sexual weapons for the pure INTENT to control a males mind, heart, emotions, and sex organ.
Whereas if she were IN TOUCH with her Dark ambivalence, she could use those same weapons at her diposal for the INTENT to MERGE her SOUL and HEAL herself and any guy that she “loves.”
Your fidelity is admirable. And by the same token, the spiritual quest which you seek with your husband is a healthy and committed motivation.
I really don’t bump into female Scorpio soccer moms that often. So I have no right to call out a woman of femininity for her savvy manipulations over their weaker husbands.
Find me a (single) female Scorpio who knows how to Surrender to a much stronger force of male, and I’ll show you an anomaly.
Hmmm…very interesting reply Pluto Puppy, and more or less what I expected, even if it reads a tad on the arrogant and irrational side. 😉 First, thank you for the back handed compliments. LOL
Also, you are wrong about almost everything; I am not a soccer mom by ANY stretch of the imagination but will agree that I am an anomaly based on your definition. I am an executive, student, wife, mother, friend, sister, daughter, I am a multidimensional personality, and as such cannot be pigeonholed into one category, as I’m sure you can’t be either. Now, cutting to the chase, if I read your post correctly, you don’t put much stock in anything I said because my husband is not a Scorpio and therefore weaker and inferior to you. Furthermore, you really don’t respect me any more than you do a single Scorpio female, because in your opinion, I haven’t met my match so to speak, and surely, if I did, I would completely morph into the monster you expect simply by virtue of my date of birth. In other words, I am not REALLY the exception because I’m not with a Scorpio man.
Ok, now that’s cleared up, it’s time for the good stuff! 🙂
No, a Pisces Scorpio match is not typically rocky and turbulent, quite the contrary, it is blissfully spiritual despite the fact there will of course, be difficulties. I do however find it curious that you think Pisces men weak and you assume I have manipulated a weaker husband. I’m sure you’re well acquainted with the various astrological theories of Pisces being the culmination of all the zodiac signs (you posted about it earlier I believe), containing within all the traits good and bad, even those of Scorpio, and they represent the mastery of all traits. My husband is the strongest male I’ve ever met of ANY sign, and completely immune to manipulation of any kind, from anyone. Of course, he is not the chest beating, brooding, obvious Alpha Male like many Scorpio men are, but that’s because he doesn’t have to be, he’s gone far beyond those limitations. There is much more I can say on this topic, and how he is able to handle me if you are ever interested, but I will try to stay on point. Suffice to say, I will never agree that all Scorpio men are stronger than any other male, and they are certainly not stronger than me just because of their sex. Pluto’s power doesn’t work that way I’m afraid. 🙂
All right, now onto the single Scorpio female, who is essentially no different from the married one (we will have to agree to disagree on this point I think). Since I only know one who is single, I will use her as my example. She is my best friend, one of my soul mates, and she is perhaps even more evolved than me in many ways, and never ceases to amaze me with her spiritual insights and quest for knowledge. She is not single by choice, but simply hasn’t met her soul mate yet. There is no trail of broken hearts in her wake, nor does she stalk men like prey. lol
OK now for the part you aren’t going to like. While you come across as a mostly enlightened individual, and one I would probably enjoy discussing life’s mysteries with, your arrogance and disturbing lack of respect for women hint at deep insecurities, and it seems so out of balance with the beautiful soulful spirituality, it’s a bit shocking actually. I think you love this forum because you have an audience that is mostly neutral; however I wonder how your ego would fare on a board dedicated to all Scorpios, male AND female. I would also find it illuminating to know how many female Scorpios you know intimately, not mere acquaintances. Surely it must be considerable if you are confident enough to brush the millions of us out there with the same brush no?
Furthermore, I think you want an evolved, spiritual woman badly, but with the venomous energy and vibrations hovering around you like a black shroud, you of course will only attract those that think in the same twisted way. And there you see a bit of my stinger, I admit it unashamedly. Lol Honestly though, don’t you think the way you’re speaking about women sounds a big unhinged? It would be like me saying all Scorpio men are serial killers or have the potential to be. Ridiculous right?
Anyway, I understand enough to know that whatever deep hurt caused this belief of yours must have been significant because I can in a strange way feel your pain, but at the same time, it’s ruling your emotions and that is holding you back from finding true happiness. Hopefully, one day you’ll be able to emerge from the ashes and see that; moving forward and finding the woman that the spiritual you richly deserves.
We are what we believe, and if you look around and do not like what you see, then only you can change it, and you do so by changing the belief. There is no karma, we are not here to suffer, we are here to become creators and be happy, joyful, embracing all that lifts us higher and helping others by empowering them to do the same. Guilt, aggression, and torment are the soul’s way of telling us we are not being true to ourselves. Anyway, that’s a rather simplistic view of some of my philosophies of life, but all have served me well. 🙂
The Dark. What is it, in Truth? The Personality certainly doesn’t know it let alone has a relationship with it. Because that ego Lies to itself from above the surface of reality, fearing what it does not know, nor ever will know.
Thanks for the super contrived expressions, the proclomations of your life’s perfection, and the utopia in which you are not a monster of.
Monsters wear many masks.;)
Hmm… what is the Dark? The simplest answer I can give is it is “Truth”, not just the pretty, comfortable truth most people acknowledge, but the entirety which includes the ugly, terrifying truth we sense from the depths of our souls. I agree with you that the ego is not equipped to deal with it, since it’s function is to help us navigate the physical world and it holds at it’s core a driving need to shield us and veil the shadows that dwell within the subconscious. If we listen only to the ego then we will never know truth, and walk through life blind to the deeper meaning of life. Surrendering to the subconscious means accepting that we are capable of not only those actions and emotions viewed as good and positive, but also those that are considered evil and negative. When presented with a choice, there is always two sides, the light and the dark. Most people choose only the path of light because it is palatable and easy, but if you do not also explore the dark, you cannot say that you chose wisely or correctly. It is only when you have the courage to explore the shadows, breathe them, and taste them, that you can conquer them and thus reject or accept them.
Perhaps this is why two Scorpios are often a contentious match at best. The intensity with which we can explore The Dark is all consuming, and the craving for it unparalleled. I’ve often thought this is why Pisces is considered a good match, because they already understand it and don’t need to experience it the same way we do, even though they can and will. As such, they can help guide us through it, be a lifeline when we need it, and give us the freedom to explore without feeling threatened by it. One of my best friends in high school was a male Scorpio. We were so much alike it was literally like looking into a mirror, and thinking back on it now, we did surrender to each other in ways we probably couldn’t understand at the time given our age, not just sexually but in every way, and it threatened to overwhelm both of us. Though we drifted apart, to this day there is an undeniable pull and we know when we are thinking about each other. Intense and exciting is was, no question, but it obviously wasn’t meant to be. 😉
It’s unfortunate you see my words as contrived, but c’est la vie. What I say is the truth as I see it, and honestly…perfection is overrated, as is Utopia. I strive for neither really, because if there is no longer a quest, what fun would there be? Monsters do indeed wear many masks, but isn’t that why they are so fascinating? 😉
I may be naive(LOL) in saying this, but I think the scorp in my case was retaliating against me for having the gall to confirm my suspicion that he was still legally married when he played the cat and mouse game with me. Although he said he had forgiven me in emails, I think he may have either reassessed shortly there after, or was his way of lashing out and stinging me, not able to accept that he could trust me. Interesting his hyprocrisy: he could lie about his marital status, but I was judged for investigating his lie. The scorpion dislikes the spotlight.
So be it, I do not regret my choice as I needed to know and if it meant losing this friendship, thats on him. I cannot say I am sorry for protecting myself at all.
Im moving on….and up.
Pluto: how is your love life going? Ive read all the posts here but have not seen any mention of your seeing someone? Dying to know if its a Leo 😉 ?
“Pluto: how is your love life going? Ive read all the posts here but have not seen any mention of your seeing someone? Dying to know if its a Leo”
I’ve been “Loving” each and all of you… haven’t I ??
So love on that level… among any broad spectrum of people is effortless for me.
Here’s another thing people must understand about Scorpionic Love:
We go deep. Too deep… for the superficiality and fickleness of “play” love.
Scorpionic love can be Transcendent. It can and does, Invoke the STORMIEST VULNERABILITY… “THROUGH love”. It’s energy contains layers and layers of deep unknowns, and it must be met Fearlessly during one-on-one partnership. This has been a very challenging area of my love life.
Venus in Scorpio depth of union, is so so deep, so profound… it makes the Gods Blush. That’s the kind of “love” I need in a close bond with a woman.
Yet in my travels… the Dark Knight has yet to find his Damsel who will go that far ( emotionally, sexually, psychologically, spiritually and worldly)… into the Unknown Underworld of Pluto and his Virtuous Kingdom.
The risks for her are far too intense. She would rather be safe and coddled at a surface love only.
Each woman in my life, has been terrified… yes terrified… of such Transformations within her.
That summarizes my “love life”.
Wow, pluto, you have written what I have read elsewhere about the deep, intensive love connection scorpios experience. (you should write a book).
I felt and discussed that with the scorpio man, and now see from your words what he meant. Is this why the scorpio male is so inquisitive, and takes significant time in getting to know a woman, to determine if she has the desire, ability and fearlessness to be able to give to you? I mean, I have heard that scorps need to investigate the hell outta a woman to se if she is worthy and willing to take the ride into the depths that a scorp wishes to go?
This I find so fascinating. Also, how long do you date a woman before you determine she is not able to meet those needs? It sounds like a difficult task in this search…almost painful?
No, not difficult Leo Lady. Not painful. Maybe it’s supposed to be. Fate is in the Path itself. I still get together with a woman for sex, but it’s meaningless… afterwhich she looks like a tornado just steamrolled her. Then we rarely see eachother again.
That’s the repetitive gap I endure, between Who I am… and What she is not.
The omnipresence of God is all I really know Lady Leo. So… once IN that place… everything in the tangible environment (attachment to form)is then known to be an amusing slight-of-hand.
Mind-Heart-Soul Consciousness doesn’t Ever fall victim to personality traps of survival, family/public approval or yearning in want.
My life is now lived on level where I now pay attention to Omens… which are people, events and circumstances happening ‘every second in my life.
I am now equipped to handle ‘Anything’ that comes my way. I don’t care how scarey. I’m ready.
And that is mainly due to not fearing death anymore, Literally. I have died in life and love, many many times over. So now, I just Am.
Maybe Leo Lady, this is ONE scorpio who has decided to be on his own hehe. I doubt he could handle a leo like ourselves!! And anyway, i believe he would know us too well!!
Hi Ladies,
Each Scorpio, especially evolved, has a passion and BEING. You must consider embarking on this journey with them.
I have chosen a very difficult journey for a woman. At the moment, I have to become spiritually ready or simply, I will not survive. It is love, but it is also a way of life. This is what happens when Scorpio knows everything about you, and choses you.
My Scorpio, from the first time he saw me, knew that I was Samurai.
Simply, there is nothing more honourable and noble…
Hello Gatubela:
I agree with you 100%.In my communication with this last scorpio, I knew I was being “investigated” by him inhis quest to get to know me, evaluate me. I was nothing but authentic, showing my beliefs, my vulnerabilties. His suave scorpio ways made me feel safe to be so vulnerable which I do not regret at all. I revealed much about who I am because I feel confident and assured in my being.
I can see now this is his natural nature, and shortly after we met and spoke, I was open to being submissive in certain areas. I even told him that I felt his over whelmingness, and that it was a feeling I was not accustomed to as I felt I had no control. (I am sure he loved knowing he had the control). He seemed to really enjoy my saying that.
I was surprised at myself as being a Leo I am usually the one who seeks submissive, passive men, always seeking control. I knew this scorpio was totally different, and as I believe the power is really in the hands of the sub, when she gives it, she knows she is giving it and does not feel like a victim.
Oh boy, all this talk about scorpio men makes me want to meet another one! Lordie help me!
“… I even told him that I felt his over whelmingness, and that it was a feeling I was not accustomed to as I felt I had no control. (I am sure he loved knowing he had the control)….”
YES!… Now you guys are getting it!
THAT Truth Lady Leo… Right there, is to me… the ONLY JOURNEY a woman (every woman) ‘should take’ when searching for Real and True Love with a male.
HE alone,(I’ve said it before)must “be able” (Meaning–> have the Power) to CHANGE her perception (inner-worlds) of ‘What’ love really IS… and What love powerfully MEANS….. Continuously.
Those triggers which “enable” women to ‘lose your grip on things’… are feelings you should treasure… and not scurry away from like a frightened little bunny.
Almost every woman on the planet does Not understand the Beauty of Surrender. No joke.
She rebukes it… as if she had knowing that she was going to DIE… LOL!!! … hahaha… no pun.
You three Leo Women are now actually the closest to “knowing” what we are all about. Bless your hearts… you’ve realized a hidden treasure;)
“… I was surprised at myself as being a Leo I am usually the one who seeks submissive, passive men, always seeking control…”
And THANK YOU AGAIN!
O LET IT RAIN DOWN TRUTH on a womans head!!
Women of all signs (nature) can learn from this damned TRUTH. If they would only peel away their Illusions about themselves. LoL.
hehe Lady Leo i believe you are right. I have also gone for the submissive passive men who i liked to control but i was way out of my depth in this, however pluto i was wanted to go to the deep core with my scorpio. I was ready to delve into the unknown, it was not surface love with him and yes i did feel like i was being tested. lady Leo i too feel the need to meet another scorpio and pluto puppy, youre making me want to peel my clothes off with that magnetism…wow get the girl a cool drink!!!
Pluto,
I, too was just as happy at my ability to be open to the lessons he was teaching me about being vulnerable, letting go of control and how I thought I “needed” to be in control.
Here is an exchange we had during our first telephone conversation after chatting onine daily for a week.
When discussing submission, he said its the sub who has the real power in the relationship, by freely giving of herself. So, I took that opportunity to tell him about a scene from the movie “Secretary”, in which a young woman works for a sadistic attorney. After she makes a mistake typing a document, he orders her to stand in front of his desk, bending over slightly and read the letter aloud, as a form of submission. He then stands behinds her, spanking her hard on her fully clothed bum.
She appears shocked at first, but eventually seems to enjoy and continues to let him, till he eventually pleasures himself (alone, no sex). She stands, after he walks away, and goes into the ladies room, where SHE then pleasures herself at the memory.
(in the movie the relationship continues, into more intense submissive acts, they do fall in love).
Anyhow, so on our first telephone call, I am telling this story to the scorpio, and he is dead silent, listenly intently. Finally, he speaks and seemed somewhat shocked, or at least, intrigued that I had the courage to share it with him, and guess what? I WAS TOO! I have never in the past felt comfortable on a first call, to speak so freely to a man about anything sexual or so intimate. Never used the words “He pleasured himself,,”LOL.
Yet I did….a few days later, scorp told me he looked up that scene on youtube, enjoyed it very much and wanted to do it to me! LOL….
I wonder of this is the type of information that you scorpios wish to know about whether a woman is ready to go to that depth you spoke of? I tell ya, in the short time I spent with this guy, I grew in emotional and sexual maturity, thats for sure!
“I tell ya, in the short time I spent with this guy, I grew in emotional and sexual maturity, thats for sure!”
Beautiful to hear.
However, I will say this regarding that movie’s vignette of submission.
Be careful. I mean, sex is supposed to be a Sacred Act between man and woman.
But that image, to me, suggests more of a “pleasure seeking”… “game” (ego-laced sans Soul-bonding)… if you will. The Psychology behind sex, the act itself… can get mightily twisted if two people cannot Love eachother on other planes of Union. That kind of sex can shatter the goodness in a human being.
Domination (by the male) during sex is not soley a physical act of supremecy. In a Superior Sexual being (the male)… IF, he is Elvolved at Deeper and Higher planes of CHARACTER… that would BE a male who Does indeed “Revere” every breath, response and sensitivity of a naked woman.
When domination during sex gets cold and kinky… egocentric (sans emotion) intent morphs into Sadomasochistic acts. And in my sexual experience, sadomasochism esstentially means an intense exchange of sickening INTENT… because there has been no allowance for the presence of God (in heart and soul) ‘to enter” the sexual exchange. Rather, sadomasochism is to me, the twisted Absence of God in both man and woman.
I really doubt many male “attorneys”… of all people… are that spiritually reverent toward themselves and toward the Divinity of Love within a woman. Just my belief.
I love that you are so passionate about love making, and that everything has such intense, emotional importance to you.
The scorp man told me once that love making between two people should “leave us both as emotionally spent after as we are physically exhausted”.
Damn….I wished I could have experienced that. Sigh.
Yes, sex is like breathing to me. It’s simply another dimension of my ‘Nature.’
I’m sure that all of you Leo gals would have whipped off your panties by now… had I been sitting with each of you, tea in hand… talking on a nice and cozy sofa.
That’s just the way attraction is supposed to happen.
The woman shouldn’t be dictacting what she “thinks” attraction is.
We soon change that comfort zone in her… real quick.
L.L, I plugged you a reply on the long wormy post of 598.
wow. yes yes yes. i love this conversation. can relate. and i really appreciate the level of honesty of these leos hello! and pluto. hello! me being a virgo understands the depths of surrender and being “submissive” . and i agree.. if there is no heart and soul it is just games, ego and falsity .and just shallow fucking.
That was my fear umm…the games, the ego and the falseness. My heart and soul was in to growing and although we were never physical, as in physical, my heightened spirituality was awakening. I was experiencing depths that i had never gone to before. And like i stated before, i ended up in purgatory, waiting for him to rescue me, waiting for him to say it was all going to be ok, just like i had with him…..nothing…that was the saddest part. I wanted the ego to go away, i wanted him to reach out and go on the journey with me in whatever shape or form. I have become very intuitive since we met, i now see him in a vision, his head is in his hands, he holds a cigarette and is shaking his head side to side…as if to say no. I see a pained expression on his face, he is tired…he knows no love now,he uses meaningless words to many
honey,
his loss.his death. scorpios will never rescue a woman.not unless it is truly warranted. you have alot more strength and inner power than you realize. man.. these men do leave women in messes. thats passionate love for ya.the all consuming passion, the intensity in sexuality, desire..the longing, the waiting the buildup, the release..yup. then the retreat.its just the way it goes. you cant have it all with them. meaning the normal day to day existence bound up with societal responsibility and expectation..
leonine and lady leo, i have a leo friend who was also with a scorp and did an art piece based on a conversation between her and another woman( possibly leo?) who said she was ” on her third scorpio” hehe sounded like some kind of drug/drink.pretty funny.
so as intoxicated as you feel or want to feel dont lose sight of you. if you know what i mean hehe.
If there is a third scorpio on my horizon……oy vey is all I have to say!
A tingle of fear yer a smidge of excitement. I will never lose sight of myself, God willing.
fear and excitement.cripes. the one i know is so damn sexy.his smell alone drives me nuts. completely nuts.
Well there we go pluto…confirmed by a true scorpio. I always said that i was quite happy to explore the depths of submission through role play etc. And the reason for my interest in all karmic pleasures was because of my true love for this guy. But as you stated it had to be realised from both sides because when the truth came out about other endeavours, it left me used and nothing more than a freebie sex toy, that i could not grasp. The scorpio who i loved so much, masked his other exploits from me and possibly his harem of women. However i DO believe that over the course of our conversations and our deep connection, i felt his love (naive as you may think) but as you explained maybe he got scared, a mixture of the closeness moving more towards his real existence or possibly not being able to pursue it further. I also believe that i was tested throughout, which in the end failed miserably (but its a human reaction to react lol) He did discuss his private life to me, which i have now found to be true. I am also not going to seek answers anymore from myself about him….i believe that his unevolved nature and the connection scared him, i believe that although through submission, there was a wonderful friendship, where it was equal respectful and possibly his cold reaction at the end was because of seeking the truth about him. I KNOW i have been with him through many lives, he continues to run on the hamsters wheel, he is not ready to face his own demons in life. I love him for who he is (yes i still do)but i cannot help him grow, he has to do this himself (if he really wants to…Umm yes maybe another scorpio is my way of overcoming. Now i cant look into the eye of another without seeing his face, it will pass i hope and wen it does maybe i will find peace.
Hmmmmm,
Evolved Scorpio, once their antennae picks up on a particular person, does not test…they teach and wait for the outcome. They know already, EVERYTHING. So, it won´t be with just anybody – if they are truly interested. It will be someone that understands their passion or innermost worlds and can live it out with them. Even temporarily. Under this context, failure is not an option.
The reason being is that they give themselves, heart and soul, when in love. This is not a simple statement. It is a divine one.
If you trample Scorpio´s heart with EGO, it is more painful to them then you can imagine. Women are not conscious, most of us, of this piece of HEAVEN. So, they put you through HELL.
Remember what I have said…polarity to unity. It is the pathway – and if they are evolved, they need to see that you can walk your own way to HEAVEN. Until then, you are on your own.
I am not talking about the unevolved ones…they are in hell themselves and have to find their heaven. The same rule applies to them…you are on your own.
Due to the fact that women are the creative energy, women should work on developing these skills (balancing divine feminine and masculine within themeselves) as part the pathway to their own heaven.
Submission is the word, but it is really not the context. Perhaps “RECEIVING” could be more apt. It is because Evolved Scorpio GIVES. Understand that there is not weakness in any of these roles, but the fullfillment of the NATURE of each person to become ONE – the exchange of ENERGY requires someone to receive and someone to give.
Therefore, there is no CONTROL. So…he does not ENJOY it – that would be very corrupt and perverted.
He honours it – just as much as he honours himself. That is a lot of intensity.
“Evolved Scorpio, once their antennae picks up on a particular person, does not test…they teach and wait for the outcome.”
Gatubela, I love the accuracy of that view. It’s quite amazing to me that you actually know such a subtlety, yet powerful contrast between our multi-leveled nature.
Excellent understanding.
Pluto:
Yes I saw your reply about the lady you have relations with. Its a shame she cannot engage with you in the depth you swim in, in all areas of your life. I have to say that when I was getting to know the scorp man, I too felt that I was in he shallow existence as it relates to sex. I mean, I felt his incredible vortex of emotion when we sppoke of sex and what it means, but I admit I was frightened at first at his intensity.
Later, as I felt myself open up more to him, sharing vulnerable experiences and feelings, I began to feel more comfortable with exploring deep, intimate sexual intentions with him.
One night, while we we chatting via IM, he began to share his fantasies of what it would be like when we met. He was graphically detailing his desires. I,on the other end of my computer, was blushing, but enjoying everything he was saying. Finally, he says to me “You just need the right person to bring you to the place I am at”. At first, I thought “No, I dont!!”. But then later I realized he, as a scorpio, was at a level much deeper than I could comprehend.
It was an eye opening experience, to say the least.
“I love that you are so passionate about love making, and that everything has such intense, emotional importance to you.”
Yes it certainly does.
Everything ‘Happening’ in our lives speak of Tremendous Meaning. So living in an existence without meaning is living in the falsity, or creation… of man’s Myth.
That fabricated myth… is living in a reality sans seeking ones Ultimate Truth, beyond ones Nose, or self-importance.
Hahaha… and Maggie Gyllenhaal is a Scorpio… I laugh because… deep within, I know that a woman who “thinks she has ultimate control” over men (via her psycho-sexual energy) is actually… hypocritically… the woman who WANTS to Surrender the most… versus a bland, non-sexual feminine kind of energy.
Baseless ego veils such incredible Truths. Denial in human beings is Pure Unconsciousness.
And Unconsciousness exists because of the Fear of SEEKING.
People are mortified in seeking their Truth. That pervasive Fear dominates a baseless ego. It’s a never ending cycle, like our Four Seasons. It’s a reality of Meaninglessness.
I’m sure, that Maggie was cast in that movie BECAUSE OF her psycho-sexual female Scorpio nature. And that is a classic psychology of sex which permeates through the female Scorpio… it is one major ’cause’ in their plight for absolute dominion over weaker males.
It intrigues me that no other Sun Sign was cast for her particular role in that film. Infact, the movie business on mystical levels knows exactly who they’re casting for a specific role. And I know their main basis for their choices of actor, are rooted from astrology.
I just read that jodie Foster is a scorpio. As you may recall, as a teen she played in a movie (name escapes me) where she was a gang rape victim. And she played in “Silence of the Lambs” dealing with sadistic rape, torture and death. Interesting…..also she has 2 sons whom she refuses to name the father. (she is a lesbian who gave birth)…just another example of the secret, fascinating and intelligent scorpio.
All those sadistic/twisted reality/roles… are a perfect fit for the female Scorpio. They are nothing what I would call Noble, Divine or Virtuous realities in human beings.
I would simply call it, and I have… the cold Nihilation of a twisted personality. That’s it.
Nothing Transformative about Psychosis. Just more Illusion. God ain’t present in that manifestation of reality, but a morbid Psychosis certainly is.
Jodie Foster is a very bright woman. Yet I don’t know how ‘Aware’ she is of Death of the—>> Personality. Or what being “Feminine” innately Means.
Hating men (sexually) is an Intense form of Mistrust. And Jodie’s movies have reflected that.
And deep Mistrust… is not Godly. Because that MEANS one is shattered by past traumas with men, and one does not trust the blazing purity in ones Heart or Soul.
…So the inward hate and fear of Surrendering to ‘a good man’ is increasingly intensified.
Female Scorpio’s choose a man having prior knowing, if they can trick and manipulate that guy into a future love slave.
LoL… and Jodie Foster has done just that, through no mention of the Father to the media of her kids.
Extreme Secrecy = Sick, to me… nothing fascinating about that;)
“… Scorpions are rather negative individuals and they absolutely love the positivity of people. They are deeply secretive and it could take a lifetime to work them out. I was willing to spend my lifetime working together through this growth..”
Yes, Leonine… those who swim blindly through years of their own manifested darkness.
Light and Darkness or Heaven and Hell… exist in Mind. The way out, life’s maze… needs a fearless warrior.
But fear won’t be seen, when one is fixated or attached to the comforts of material security.
We humans prosper and flourish in the Material world WITHOUT ANY strong attachments to Form (money, duty, details or results).
That statement may sound ridiculous… but it’s True.
Pluto and Leonine:
I am intrigued as to why scorpio, as a negative personality is attracted to people with a positive personality. I am an extremely positive person, in fact my car license tag is personalized with the word “happy” in it. 🙂
I noticed in my communication with the scorp that he was always intrigued with my positive outlook on life. Is it the desire to balance his negative by seeking the positive?
parallel octopus in prussian
what does this mean? Im stumped!
Lady Lion. Negative reality is of ‘Personality’ origin. Not Godly origin. Negative energy pervades ** a Trapped Mind and Heart **. That captured negative reality… are “States” of the Personality. And guess what??
Our personality HAS A CEILING. It doesn’t “know” any other dimension of being.
So remember the basic idea that whatever is IN ones Mind, is everywhere OUTSIDE (seen) of ones Mind.
If we were to feel mostly… HAPPY… get this… that doesn’t MEAN we have unlocked the mystery of our deepest Truth.
For example: I know alcoholic friends who beam smiles for days. They laugh and joke all the time. They are good people at heart. But I see, I know their drinking habits, when they drink, what they drink, WHY they drink… from my detached objectivity… I see not their joy… I see their MISERY.
Same with people who work 80 hours a week to pay down debt. Same with people who have sex 15 times a week to release the anxiety and grind of daily living. Same with people who attach themselves with countless “friends” who go to this pary, or do that at this party every week. Same with the person who Brags of his or her “success” and “importance” around a room.
So, What is the common thread here??
Sure, they all “seem” happy. But are they? Let’s be brave. Do they have no regrets of their choices?? Are these people in society AT PEACE inside?? If they say yes, Do they exemplify that each moment? Do they feel a reverent “gratitude” for their pains?… OR… do they, at very deep levels… HATE what they’ve BECOME in life?
Heavy stuff, I know.
But now you see little Leo, that stating happiness is not a symbol we wear or buy or adhere to show others how happy we feel or to show ourselves how happy we feel.
Happiness to me, is: Righteous Deeds— from a clarity and divine peace in mind, heart and soul.
Victory has occured through willful death of those above illusions.
it doesnt mean anything more than what it says. prussian is a shade of blue, very deep blue.
Not heavy to me at all because this is what I see in my daily life in 12 step circles. The outwardly projection, the mask of happiness, by those addicted to substances, work, food, people is all a facade. We call it “Dr jekyll and Mr Hyde”. Happiness is an inside job, and I have found it only thru a higher power and the lessons spiritually had taught me. And YES it al begins with gratitude being of service to others, giving back what was so lovingly given to me.
The scorp man is a work a holic, very attached to what his professional community thinks of him and his accomplishments. I think my positivity was interesting to him, while at the same time, a threat to him because he could not posess it within himself.
Prior to my recovery, when I was miserable, alone and dead inside, I was attracted to my former husbands positive outlook thru his recovery program. I was always wanting the serenity he had, but was unwilling to do the work to get it. Until I surrendered to my pain, and found a desperate desire to no longer be desperate.
I love your bravery and will to change, permanently.
“…The scorp man is a work a holic, very attached to what his professional community thinks of him and his accomplishments…”
Sure, It is OK for humans to feel accomplished, that ‘can be’ healthy and good road for our development…
However… demonstrating a ‘False Pride’ is Not supporting the Good of Deeds in our every choice-act… That, is living in ones myth. It’s very subtle.
But our Choices that are manifested of our deeds, are far from subtle.
They are karmic.
Your scorpio guy may not ‘be aware’ of much of his social karma… which btw, social behavior is almost an Influence through ‘everything’ that pervades through our karmic lives.
So he may well believe that he is a Good and Just contributor in society. Only God knows that answer. Human beings answer to a Higher Power, whether they are In Tune to the frequency of the Source, or not.
Thank you for your open-ness Lady Leo.
Hi P.Puppy,
“Whipping those panties off…”
Was GOD on that SOFA as well?
Maybe it was the moisture level in her cervix?… That came from God, True? Uh, O-oh Hello… yes, that Is The Seed I’ve talked about.
Does an intense gaze from me, mean a triggered wetness from her? It can… only if she has the strength ‘to feel’ what’s ‘really’ going on between us.
Ah, I’ve probably made this topic much to hot for kiddies;)
Uhhhh….well…geezzzz…what I actually meant is what you said to us 3 Leos.
A woman may need strength with you, but I do not believe that it would be required in order to “feel” what is really going on.
Thanx for the “heat wave”.
“…A woman may need strength with you, but I do not believe that it would be required in order to “feel” what is really going on…”
You’ll be suprised at what shocking unknowns of feeling a woman has yet to experience. They are vast.
Such as:
Fears of her Unknown sexual/psychological/emotions, which = the Gate Keeper of her FEARS or her REVELATION.
It all comes back to her capacity to “choose” the virtuous way, or maintain illusory standard.
I’m not talking about casual sex. I’m talking about SEEKING a SOULFUL LOVE. That is, If she “knows” it’s presence.
So Fear postpones that presence.
She remains at the Persophone level (above ground) enjoying her “Play Love” and her Play projections of her partner.
And I’ve already expounded that play love is concealed within human ‘Personality’–> It is Limiting, and not Transcendent through death.
That’s the whole point of Surrender in the female psyche. It is “her frightening journey” through Death-of-Sexual-Ego, followed by the divine emergence and psychological re-birth of a higher existence.
The Way becomes… the passage of her “New” Mind/Heart/Soul.
Hmmmm…Maybe that sounded snippy, but it was not meant to.
I just tried to put myself in that position of having the SUPER POWER of being able to get men to “whip their gotchies off” over tea… …by just looking at them.
Well…it made me blush and look sideways to see if anyone was looking.
You know, I am surrounded by Scorpios (5) They all have the ability to “nuke” women and make them feel what fusion and fission is all about, but they have chosen not to.
But they can…
Being able to see their own divinity allows them to perceive the divinity of others.
God is present in who they are and everything they do – including talking to people.
And yes, they will save a woman. I am a living example.
Speaking of my vulnerability: When things ended with this scorpio man, with his playing the manipulative game of asking me to met for a chat, then no showing up 3 times, I was very hurt and confused.As you know, I spent time trying to “figure him out” as to why he did that. I felt the need to have my own closure and responded to his last email. I was very raw and shared my hurt and anger. Not in any sarcastic, profane manner, but using words that identified how I felt, the disappointment at his game playing. I felt that I said what I meant, I meant what I said, but I didnt say it mean.
so, after I sent it, I re-read it….several obsessive times, cus thats just how I roll. As if I could unsend it, which I cannot. I came to find out I was hesitant in my sharing my vulnerability with him again! My EGO didnt want him to know he affected me, that I cared enough to be hurt. E.G.O.= Edging God Out. When I am in EGO, I am not in God, I am not being true to ME.
So, I came to accept that I have feelings, I am not ashamed of my feelings, of my pain and I felt the need, at least at the time I wrote the email, to express my pain to him. Not to influence him in any manner, but to find release for me. I feel a sense of closure. I am rather proud that I can express my vulnerability, I find a sense of freedom and maturity. I will choose to not care how others view it or me. In fact, today a 12 step friend who saw me break down in a meeting few days ago asked me to come work for him, says I have great strength that he admires. Go figure! There is strength in being authentic, being real, being me. Yahoo…I feel like I can run around naked and not care who see’s my cellulite, dimpled butt!
well…maybe not THAT free…yet.
Hi Lady,
LOL…I have had those moments too!!! The feeling your comments inspire in me is of children laughing, or puppies playing. Just being around them can brighten and change your energy.
“My EGO didnt want him to know he affected me, that I cared enough to be hurt. E.G.O.= Edging God Out. When I am in EGO, I am not in God, I am not being true to ME.”
Well…it really depends on “what you were really surrendering to”.
Him…or to your divine self / higher principal.
Was it about you and him…or was it about you and GOD?
Your EGO is the pathway. So, it can not be “Edging God Out”. It is actually your energetic and karmic way IN.
Situations in life, bring up our most EGO-centric – karmic moments. The mistake (only based on your internal and soulful sense that something is wrong) would be the state of your priorities. Yours (under Scorpio) got you lost in “EGO-dreamworld” / illusion.
Do you deny your imperfections, or do you recognize them and work them out under the light of truth and love?
When you are with GOD / SOURCE, you have the capacity to give, while under the effect of EGO. This is because you CAN NOT INTENTIONALLY HARM ANYONE. The energy asks you to GIVE and TO BE. The energy must flow out – and not in.
Every time that I have found myself in my EGO moments, I am conscious of them. But I instinctively know, that to maintain my connection to GOD, I must actually show all of my imperfections and virtues – including any celulite and dimples on my butt. This way, I will not fall into illusion.
I WILL see the TRUTH of the person – when the Source determines it.
As it is said…The Lord works in very mysterious ways.
So true. But most people would be to scared to use what GOD gave us.
I made a promise to myself…
My EGO for truth…and Universal Love.
It has to end – so that it does not happen again.
The universe responded to such a humble plea.
And Scorpios came into my life.
They gave me the tools and showed me the way. However, the path is mine alone to walk.
” see people for who they are”
its early morning,, not much sleep. but all ok,
addictions, i could write alot about that,
ladyleo.. i remember the rooms, the serenity prayer..its a good one .i would like to talk about some of this stuff with you sometime if thats ok with you?, i wanted to earlier but not the right time. things are shifting for me and getting real now.amazing how deluded i can get.how long can i keep it up . i dont know. one day at a time hey.
might try and sleep i have a big day tomorrow.
Umm….I am happy to be of service to you, please send me your email and I will write you. I have a personal recovery blog I write, maybe it can be of help to you.
The Serenity prayer works daily for me. Please say it today to your higher power….
You are not alone!
Hugs
thanks. my email is adventurefive@yahoo.com
Umm,
I emailed you but it was rejected and sent back. Is that email address correct?
wow something weird is going on. i have been trying to post and it wont come up!
try adding au to end of com.eg. – yahoo.com.au
im exhausted gotta get some sleep. talk soon
I have just listened to the song that P.Puppy posted from Flyleaf – All Around Me.
Well, I thought that I would give my feelings about it…
It resonates on various levels – some that I have words for and others that I believe that words would “limit” the experience.
First of all, for someone to “create” these feelings in a woman, it means that the other person has also “succumbed” to his feelings and who he is, in various levels of his being – physical, psychological, and spiritual and culminating to the “moment” of his love for her. This all comes into “reality” in the moment (s) super imposed eternally, filled with energetic “time standing still” “nothing else exists” love that “IS” between him and her. Fearless and beautiful.
She has accepted / surrendered to the “seed” of his being and through her divine self, she brings it to the “known” through her feelings for him. This alone, is indicative of her own energetic capacity as she sings and “brings it to life” giving colour.
This is very akin to masculine “penetration” – feeling “surrounded” or enclosed energetically by the feminine. The various levels of penetration and enclosure stretch from the known to the unknown. Each person is “inside” the other. Therefore, the degree of feminine enclosure has to be “perfect” so that she can “accept” or surrender to the masculine. and vice versa. The masculine can not “penetrate” or give himself, unless it is completely accepted. Better said …completely, truly, soulfully loved by her. A woman can not attain this love, unless she attains a “divine” state herself.
Well, those were my thoughts. Guess I´d better get back to my “kiddie” stuff.
“She has accepted / surrendered to the “seed” of his being and through her divine self, she brings it to the “known” through her feelings for him. This alone, is indicative of her own energetic capacity as she sings and “brings it to life” giving colour.”
Love your insight, Gatubela.
Very cool…
“… Each person is “inside” the other…”
Yes. There we go.
Now we see what God (Good) means between man and woman. However… “Inside each other”… does Not mean an illusory-ego love. Far from it.
It is mutually a fearless love. It is eternally above and beyond;— jealousy, obsession and underhanded insecurities.
Those attachments to things and circumstances are mortal. They are knowns to form. Truth is yet realized.
Fearless love?… Well, this love is not bound to fear none of those things seen in form.
Because EACH person, male and female… INCLUDE their SOUL-CONSCIOUSNESS, their divinity, with a power Infinitely GREATER than the tiny human Ego-Myth, and it’s blind expected outcomes.
And inside the other essentially means Everywhere;)
We must remember that God is not a noun.
He is an omnipresent Verb;)
Indeed he is a verb. Flowing thru me, in me and out of me.
Oh how I wish my next mate will be a scorpio…
P.P….you are awesome!
Little Leo,
Like the old cliche, be careful of what you wish for. (you’ve already been down that road of self-deceit and pretense remember?)
Darth Vader was a dim-wit Scorpio.
So people think he’s not real today, huh??
LoL… well take a good long look beyond the skin, of the greed-monger Brokers dealing on Wall Street NYC. Or the Lawyer who wants to… “Fight for You!” LoL … or the local Pharmacist who insists that dealing “your medication is essential for your recovery”… or the groups of drunk males blubbering at bars and clubs who constantly (quietly) chase women around sexually, looking for feeble attachment, stemming from utter motivations of deep desperation and illusory lonesome-ness.
Same goes for the ditzy, the glitzy, or the dull, drunk, highly insecure women addicted to the cash that men flaunt like carrots dangling in front of the status-needy bunny. LoL… not a pretty perspective, is it?
Yet right in the middle of those very corrupt and very happening realities, exists Mr. Vader.
The correlation I’m painting here?? Each of those people are “Opportunists” in some capacity… in… “The Game” of life.
The good (God) blessings available to us are to Not participate in that game from the early beginning.
Remember, Darth Vader wears black for a reason. You can’t see darkness people… until, it has Complete-Control of your life. Finding something more, something higher, is not a guarantee.
Because SEEKING in of itself… IS the actual Unknown.
So Why then, would anyone in their right mind leave the safety and comfort and coddling and ignorance and self-pity-party… of their Known experiences?
Fear, is why.
The hypocrisy of it, pervades us;)
Best wishes,
Mr. Vader
“Oh how I wish my next mate will be a scorpio…”
Scorpio is a very interesting “choice” to make. I say choice, because you are choosing an expression of a type of energy.
You must learn to survive in its quicksand dark waters, by surrendering and relaxing. It is the only way you will float. It won´t hurt you, while you are there. It will let you be a separate person, just as long as you let it surround you…separate but flowing within his waters.
But don´t be naughty.
PP,
You scare me :). With the Darth Vader talk. Make me now fearful of going anywhere near a future scorpio!
Gatubela….
You scare me too! LOL, but also intrigue me and make me want to find another scoprio. 🙂
I really did learn so much from the short time I knew this guy. At least how to be more open, more free. I will use that new courage in my next relationship.
I want to know what you meant by “Dont be naughty”?….Tell!
Don´t be naughty means…know yourself and do not fall into “illusion”.
Plutonic energy is powerful. It is distant, dark, gaining momentum upon approaching its destination (could be you!!!)…you don´t have a problem with being surrounded by a comfy darkness, do you??? It only yeilds to “truth and love”. The rest is crushed under concentrative scorpionic yes or no choices.
Understand…you must choose.
Fight darkness with darkness…and you get an amplification of it…and those shadow-scorp (which is actually your ego – kindly magnified by pluto) psychotic withdrawal episodes.
Resist…with illusionary negative intentions…the more the quicksand holds you.
The energy requires that you gently, soulfully and virtuously flow to the shores.
Think of the ocean on a calm day. It was not the calm surface that knocked you to your knees…it was the powerful undercurrent originating from the depths, far out from the “male scorpionic universe”.
“Fears of her Unknown sexual/psychological/emotions, which = the Gate Keeper of her FEARS or her REVELATION.”
Anyways…the concept or symbolic cultural code of “love – making” is all wrong for me. It is not the typical – physical hot “take off your clothes” experience. It is the pre-lude to it.
Otherwise, it just becomes an energetic, casual illusionary “get together” with a benifit package.
I am trying to understand why her unknown sexual feelings are the gateway…
Is this because perhaps she does not want to “surrender” to a very vibrant force?
“… Is this because perhaps she does not want to “surrender”…
I’ve said it one hundred times before. She’s Fearful.
It’s not that “she does not want to surrender.” That psychology infers she would be making a logical choice.
Intense attraction is ‘not a choice’ (in the female psyche-DNA)
Gut-level giddiness just HAPPENS inside a woman. She can’t explain it. And that’s because she feels a certain level of FEAR (of change). She is afraid. Simple as that. Not because ‘she chose’ to not surrender. LoL.
The moisture and response in a womans honeypot wasn’t her choice. But it happened.
It was not her who turned the steamer on high. It was the ‘male energy’ around her and in her which CREATED such a chemistry;)
He inserts. She responds.
Yet sadly, the real world pyschology out in social land of who is Boss, is primarily the other way round. Men give away their power.
She wins.
But she doesn’t want to win;) LoL
I hate to say it, but pluto puppy is right on about this, in my experience with the scorpio. Dead on right….
sighhhhhh….
Hey Leo Lady
You are really tempting me into wanting to see the face behind this evolved scorpio….show yourself Mr Scorpio 2010!!!
You know you mention the darkest side, the possessiveness and obsessiveness of a scorpion person…could this have anything to do with my North Node being in Scorpio??
I just saw my chart and found my moon is in scorpio. That must explain the nasty email I sent the scorp man when he did me wrong.
Ooops!
What does it mean if a scorpio guy told you “you’re making me love you”
Does that mean he already loves me? or is falling in love with me?
He hasn’t told me “i love you” yet and we’ve been together for 7mos but was on and off. Even after break up we still get back to each other no matter what
Are you in love with him?
It’s easier if you just find some courage and self-honesty and communicate that to him.
Those questions here are pointless, unless of course you think that we, the forum, will ride along with 7 months of manipulation with you? Ah, Nope;)
I chose to say it this way for your own benefit;)
Hi Dreamy…
Well…that is an interesting acusation!!!
…And it is indicative of more interesting “undertones” that you have NOT said.
Keep it simple.
I would have to say that Scorpio usually wears the “pants” in the relationship in this department.
So…if Scorp loves you, there is not much that will stand in his way. You WILL know it…He ain´t no baby in that department.
If you are doubting this, then you have your answer.
im not doubting it. he’s on his way to falling in love with me. ill be patient and give him time. he speaks of kids and dog already with me. he dream of it and said i am going to be his wife .. patience patience
Well it depends on the tone in which it was said but it could be-
He is having feelings against his will and he doesn’t like it. it makes him feel out of control. Love scares him more than he will ever admit.
He cannot commit to being with one woman. As much as he thinks he wants it , his subconscious and sexuality say different things and this creates a conflict within him which is constant, some of this also stems from his fear of abandonment which he experienced as a child. Added to that is his deep sensitivity on many levels and perception, and rejection of societal values and expectations, and his fear of death and loneliness, causing a seesaw push pull on off.
A connection based on sex and friendship is often better suited to scorpio than love and commitment. They are very independent.
They are lovable. They will not change. You can still love them no matter if they say they love you or not.thats the whole thing…. it really is not about what he feels for you.. so much as what you feel for him.if you can simply love him without expectation you will be fine.
Thanks ummmm..
Well said .. i now actually understand other possibilities of his feelings for the matter..
ill be fine, im a patient girl.
ill not pressure him, ill give him time 🙂
Scorpionic male chemistry is a bit different from the “norm”…
Look, not every woman “knows” what she is getting into. She won´t perceive it as the fear of change…but the fear of loosing herself.
I know that you have said it, but there is a bit of a disadvantage here. Men…basically know where the “ship is sailing” – kind of. Woman “think they know”…
The concept of what a relationship is painted out wrongly in society due to the fact that we don´t perceive things on an energetic level.
Scorpio´s male chemistry works under the mental. This is what inspires the fear that you speak of…the loosing of control…because it is an illusion.
What about a woman who also works under the mental? It is not fear that she has to deal with… it is the acceptance of the energetic “penetration” in her psychic field.
Mental male attraction / energy vortexes are shallow and insubstantial.
In the plutonic unknown, different rules apply. Its all energy…and ego illusions have no place there.
So a woman can “mentally not want to win”…but those statements apply to the known.
Balanced Divine Men give or “penetrate”…Balanced Divine women “create”…
No winning, no loosing…no fear no ego.
Its his nature and her nature transcending into …Loving eachother.
Our thoughts are energy. Every-single particle manifest into form on this planet and eternally beyond this planet, is energy. Always has been. Always will be.
Humans did not invent the Universe. Although they’d have you believe that they did by their bloated posturing and funny self-aggrandizement. LoL!
An intense cauldron of energy is ‘a feeling’ (not a thought) of primordial emotion. Such as orgasm through sex.
This primordial energy within a human is: an Ancient Instinct.
That deep, boiling reserve of ancient instinctual energy, IS my nature. That nature was gifted to me at birth. That’s why it’s called ‘nature’ LOL. We don’t acquire intense reservoirs of feeling after leaving the womb, unless it’s given.
Emotional-psychological explosions, thanks to infantile ego-illusion and meaninglessness… form through the psyche and locates a heart annihilating pain. That could be described as: a battle of intense inner-woes surging from boiling reserves of FEELING. Not from dry Reason. Huge difference.
Those explosions within (over years of unconscious self-destruction and torment) BIRTH a new and free psychological power.
It is a change of BECOMING. He is then Reborn, as the cliche would have it.
He is no longer the same man. Forever.
That is what Transformation, or change thru death ‘Means’… to me in my life.
That’s what…
Sun, Mars and three other planets in Scorpio, + 5 planets in the 8th House- (of Sex, Death and Transformation) do to a man.
The source bestowed me a Courage for those above descriptions.
Now, with a Light Shone on Soul, I Am…. Grateful of this Journey;)
“That deep, boiling reserve of ancient instinctual energy, IS my nature”
Well…somethings are worse then “death” and make “living” impossible / unbearable.
Life circumstances can “open” this reserve when faced with “Between bad and badder “fork in the road” deeply hidden ego cleansing issues / universal and cosmic ignorance.
This is very Scorpio.
How much do we feel ourselves in comparison to feeling others?
In the end, it comes down to a dualistic and polar “How much do you feel GOD” in your heart and BEING compared how you are living in mentally?
Balance is necessary – hence the saying that none of us are perfect. It is difficult to maintain the balance of intense ancient energies and…well…this. It is pitifully lacking and barren.
So, it has to be brought up – almost through osmotically. Hopefully, the “osmotic membrane” is not cluttered with… “EGO”. The pathway for the joining of our “hearts” and “minds” with carthartic moments of “energy bursts” for many people, who have “osmosis membrane issues” usually leads to more destructive behaviour.
For example…anger.
Well, we have those plutonic energy bursts…the energy brings us or “vortexes” us to point zero of the extremes that we physically perceive in the KNOWN…thus we have intensity…deep emotions from “down there”, brought “up here”.
Dreamy…
There is only ONE way that you know if Scorpio is TRULY into you.
As I said, the rules are different in PLUTO´s underground …i.e. the UNKNOWN.
They are masters and magicians of disguise in the mental arena. Therefore, you must meet them where they can not go enigmatically “chameleon” on you…in the UNKNOWN.
Scorpio will be very honest there.
So…the question that I have for you is…HAS HE?
HAS HE SHOWN WHO HE REALLY IS TO YOU?
This “who he really is” will be based on their “PASSION”. The one thing, he has not told you. However, he is willing to “show you”…if you meet him there.
Gatubela,
Sometimes your writing style is that of a mystic and I cannot follow you. Im interested to know where the “unknown” is that Dreamy can meet him there? And in what context do you refer to when you say “Has he shown you who is really is?”.
Do you mean has he gotten vulnerable with her? Shared intimacies that a scorpio rarely does?
My former scorp shared with me one Sunday that he had just viewed a dramatic, emotional tv news show depicting a desperate situation in a city he used to live in, and it moved him to tears. Before he told me this, he asked “Can I share a story with you?”….asking permission, in a somewhat serious manner, indicating it was important to him. I took it as such and paid quiet, reflective attention. When he was done telling it, he said “Even though I am 6’4 and 240 pounds, I sit here with tears running down my face”.
I interpreted that as his challenge to society that “Big boys” dont cry, and he was trying to share his emotions, vulnerability with me. I thanked him for feeling open to share that with me, and appreciated it since I have 5 older brothers who rarely show emotion. I told him his empathy was what made so well suited for his particular occupation in helping people.
It was a rather lovely conversation.I was blessed to be a recipient of it,
umm you summed it up beautifully. I have to admit if you read back through my conversations, you will see that i believed he loved me also. Using words such as growing old together, can’t wait for us to be together, wont be happy until we are. It turned out to be all surface stuff, just meaningless words and leaving a trail of devastation in his path. From what i gather, the scorpio lives in the moment, gets bored easily and although is gushing with you one minute, once boredom sets in, he moves quickly on to his next woman. It is similar to the cycle of life and death, i have no explanation but i know that the pain is extraordinary and if we were together in the real world, i would be able to fight for it, however, there comes a time when you need to move on, i havent got there yet. I still look for the reasons behind the insincerity and how someone could clearly just turn their back on you. Time heals, stay true to yourself and like umm said…expect nothing
Leonine & Ummm..
yes i want to expect nothing.. BUT,
like Pluto Puppy said:
“Our thoughts are energy. Every-single particle manifest into form on this planet and eternally beyond this planet, is energy. Always has been. Always will be.”
I do believe in this so i rather be positive and pray we’ll be together/one eventually.
Thanks Pluto Puppy, Gatubela, Ummm, Leonine, Lady Leo & everyone in this forum for the insights
Check this.
A male shedding tears in front of a woman is actually inner STRENGTH. Yep. Pure Bravery. That is… IF, his motivations ‘to share’ with you rise up from a deep Soul-Center. But Not from a feeble Insecurity. That is a very important distinction.
Many… many… people, especially mental natured women… Cannot Open their Souls infront of a male ‘they really Love.’
Ego-Illusion, without fail, blocks… deflects, such a vulnerable, immortal depth. Only a “Surface” love is “Known”
To All Women out there. Just ponder on this for long while.
What vulnerable power have you genuinely and openly offered to a male– that you have loved?
Because with male Scorpio, he CAN… Show you. Because he “knows HOW”
But the cost of showing you time and again is far too great, if the woman doesn’t psychically understand what incredible bravery it takes to destroy an illusory-agile-ego of denial. And denials are not made of Truth.
So male Scorpio’s (good ones) can be way, waaaaaaayy ahead of you women internally. That’s because he knows his rawest self. And he is WILLING to transform his very being, into something Better.
Yet the question in him remains. Do you??… (the woman) WANT to ‘Know’ the Lie of your baseless Ego?
He already knows. The answer is,
You can’t;)
… So all of that means your Scorpio isn’t “going cold” on you (gals)…. it just means that a woman isn’t (can’t) be — Hot (beneath her skin, her fine ass or her pretty face).
The ‘Coldness’ riddle I read so much about on this forum and throughout so many astrological books and what not, is now solved;)
Perspective.
Ah but also he will go ‘cold’ if he gets found out on his dirty little secrets Pluto. I mean i know this is a forum on Scorpio per say, but it is clear to make the distinction between an evolved and unevolved one, who to my knowledge are completely different perspectives. I doubt you could learn much from an unevolved one, just heartache right?
Also please could you give us understanding as a way to characterise between the two types if possible please
Ok Pluto…slow down here, sugar. My mind is trying to grasp what you say about the scorp going “cold”.
Are you saying that a woman who cant be “hot” meaning: a woman who cant open herself up, allow him into her inner core, allow herself to be vulnerable…that the man will turn cold on her and retreat back to his shell?
Im just not sure I read that correctly? Thanks for clarifying.
“… but it is clear to make the distinction between an evolved and unevolved one, who to my knowledge are completely different perspectives. I doubt you could learn much from an unevolved one, just heartache right?…”
Leonine.
Finding the difference of Character, or Evolution, takes time and probing and observing and listening.
Motivations are ALL. Not what he says. But what… he… MEANS. Then assimilate what he says and compare that Identity manifestation to ‘What’ he actually DOES.
His Choices, every choice, from his Expression to his Actions are everything.
Lady Leo,
A woman’s places high-Value in life, of what?
Her LOOKS.
The way she wants ‘to look’ is valued to such an obsessive extent, those choices to ‘beautify’ dominate her life. It’s completely natural. Nothing abnormal about it.
A guy, his Value, is not established within society by perception of “his Looks.”
Women, perceive a mans value based on qualities and characteristics through his Life Direction, his Earning Power (or Potential) and his inner Strength and Humility.
So knowing this distinction of Value differences, perceived between man and woman… we now see why a man is not ‘chosen’ by a woman based solely on his looks.
She chooses him based on— The Way He Makes Her FEEEEEL.
That choice of togetherness is not logical. Yet most women still choose men for the primary motivation of Financial Security. They want him to have a defined and active life of his own, while she can share in that direction.
So we come back to my initial point. That HOTNESS is IN him. Projected OUT.
So women by contrast, are perceived as HOT, through the male eyes… based ONLY on her SEX APPEAL (first). He may love her later in time for her inner qualities, but that depends on the Character and Evolution of the male “to Know”.
In summary, a woman needs “the Hotness” of a males ‘Inner’ Identity each and every moment— to Stoke her Fireplace.
So when a male Scorpio ‘detaches’ the Flame he Burns within a woman… he is then judged as “Cold”.
It’s not that he was Ever ‘cold’ to her. It’s just that she was MISSING his warm Fire.
It all depends on his capacity and depth to Love, in Truth, not pretense.
Well, this is what I have been trying to say…you must meet him in plutonic “unknown”.
The known “falls away”…and the rules change. No fears, no ego…just his truth (if he has one) and your truth (if you have one)
So…you are kind of “naked” with each other.
If Scorpio is telling you about his fears and vulnerability…well, that is part of the loving, but it is NOT HIM – if he is evolved.
He has a more deeper truth to his being, that you must understand first. Bring him there…because he is more than willing to go there (it has been real lonely all alone down there and NO ONE KNEW) and meet him on his terms…
Expressed vulnerability or the beauty of Scorpio is the RESULT of this truth, but don´t loose the forest because of the trees. You need to go further down YOUR EGO, in order to let the waters flow.
Yes, I may write “mystically” but it is because I perceive various “mystical” truthes.
You won´t “find out his truth”…you must “love out” his truth.
Then, it flows out naturally from his heart to yours.
It flows naturally, because the DIVINE MASCULINE gives. It will not be able to help it. Just as a woman´s cervix reacts, so does the male essence as well. But it gives under COSMIC /UNIVERSAL law.
This means that the receiver will receive in the spirit of LOVE. So, I hope all of those Scorpios don´t get all nervous.
The unknown is what you do not physically perceive. The intensity of Scorpio can not evade this very fundamental aspect of their being.
But that journey, is one that you have to take as a result of your feelings for him.
Everything that you are saying, in Scorpio´s world…has no meaning because you are lacking the other half of yourselves…and holding on to the “wrong half” or …
Your Mentalizations of what your relationship really is.
Just STOP thinking…and start hearing those crickets.
Now…what do you FEEL? If you can not stop the “mental chatter” in your brain, you will NEVER understand Scorpio. And you will never FIND him.
He…is in your HEART…and not in your HEAD.
Go there.
Now I am “getting” you, Gatubela.
Basically, when the scorpio man “emits” his aura; filled with intense, passionate resonation, the mate (woman) who is fearful, will put up a defense from fear. Feeling overwhelmed and frightened at the unfamiliar intensity, I resisted it myself. It was as if a giant flood water had lashed itself onto me, and I felt the need to run away.
As I spent more time with the scorpio, and read more about this sign, I slowly began to release the resistance, open up and go with his flow. I never felt so comfortable to share such intimacies with any man…ever. The lessons in vulnerability he gave were amazing.
I do think women need to take a class on this stuff before dating a scorpio!
Well, the overwhelming sensation…is part of it, but not All of it.
You must understand what he is trying to get you to see…He will never tell you…you must see it. In order for you to see it, you also must “BE IT” too.
It is what made him decide to “concentrate on you”…he already knew.
“What vulnerable power have you genuinely and openly offered to a male– that you have loved?”
Me, myself and I, along with my “fine ass” and “pretty face”.
Uhhh…reviewing the “posterior” merchandise, perhaps my ass ain´t so fine…and my face won´t stop traffic!!!
I dont think scorpios look so much to the exterior of a woman, more so to their “interior”…they scope of their heart, mind and soul. That was my experience, anyhow. He cared more about my intelligence, spirit and connectedness.
Yes…that is what I am trying to say when I mention that there are parts of me that could use the gym and the spa.
And yes P.Puppy, I am also trying to say that as well.
Due to the “soul vacume”, scorpio´s thermal effect / soulful intensity will “poof out” because it grasps at…ooops…NOTHING THERE.
What you are left with is…Plutonic energy (dark, objective, point zero) viewed under a woman´s MENTAL construct i.e. “Fluffy Bunny” Cold. The mind can not rationalize itself out of this one. You already know the effect.
We choose the “easy way” to handle our problems…or the plutonic fork in the road, by ego self defence mechanisms. God forbid that we decide to “NEVER CAUSE HARM TO SOMEONE” as to not cause harm to ourselves.
Pluto´s Black Hole effect requires surrender because the energy is UNIVERSAL. Not even Scorpio can battle “GOD”…this is why you must “Surrender” to a force greater than yourself.
So, handling this energy is a GREAT responsibility. Why…because you must bring up manifest your “plutonic universal truth” from the extremes to the KNOWN, and sadly, ooops…NOTHING to grasp it.
So…he is not COLD…he is “Soulful”. No…soul energy is not able to “comfort” the feeble mind that is trying to limit this energy. The energy goes to the mind…the mind does not “rationalize” the energy.
So…if you are trying to “rationalize” him…you have completely missed the point. He is not there…and he will NEVER be there.
LOVE is the VERB /VIA /pathway used to channel this energy. So, this is why we look at people´s intentions (as P.Puppy says) in their actions.
This is why DIFFERENT RULES apply.
So…you must release “yourself” out of this equation in order to gain more sensitivity to your “spiritual” surroundings.
IT is ALL ENERGY. The Thought LIMITS it…but it is not IT.
Lady Leo. Yes, that’s a fine perspective. And a realistic one to boot.
However… we DO look at the exterior of other makes & models… so if she doesn’t run right, we soon trade-her-up for a newer model. LOL! I didn’t just say that… did I?? Ahh honesty or nothin at all.
That’s the dichotomy.
She may be quite the Sexy Siren shimmering her power before the drool of the crowd… yet almost always, that dazzle flickers out quickly, once the boom-boom sex becomes ritual. That type of woman on our arm is usually missing all of the essential inner worlds a male Scorpio intrinsically needs from a life partner.
If she’s great in bed, so what?.. that doesn’t mean she has her life together, or she has the moxie to grow. That’s one reason we move on to newer exteriors. Remember we are independent, vivified men. Not smitten clingly school boys.
Women need to realize that a monogomous relationship with male Scorpio is much more about psychological love and growth, and more about psychic undercurrents and deeper cosmic capacities to strip naked emotionally. If she can BE that?… and tune into our “hidden” frequencies?… we don’t stray.
Our loyalty and devotion to such a woman is second to none. But she’s a rarity to find… that luxurious model is certainly ‘a real classic’ discovered over time.
“… Not even Scorpio can battle “GOD”…this is why you must “Surrender” to a force greater than yourself.”
Yes indeed.
If you do, The Force will be with you:) just ask that kid named Skywalker.
So…women do not soulfully love back.
What do you think Scorpio feels? Well, you undergo “mental ouchie” which causes emotional disturbances in the stuggle for “mental control of the situation” while you rationalize his conduct through mental opinions and not “soulful” ones.
This is what I mean when we should not go EGO stomping on someone´s TRUTH / half truth / or another EGO-centric expression.
It becomes “EGO tug-of-war”.
Scorpio can “do that” any time, any day.
But once they decide to submerge in the underworld…it is nothing but “flow”.
Flow is soulful. Not mental.
Again…it is all Plutonic Thermal dynamics.
OK…I have written enough. It is that I am in an airport and am really FEELY today.
Chao!
Yes…Luke is quite an interesting character.
Once the mind is “purified” …these energies become visible and available. They “override” the physical through their very “hidden” influence.
I know a Scorpio that is quite the “magician”. It can get quite interesting once you mix intense passion/emotions, concentration and will power (the mind directs the energy) and “throw” this cosmic energy at…a woman perhaps?
Interesting that I was able to “perceive” it.
As I said, you do not fight darkness with more darkness. Others “skills and abilities” are required.
Like “THE FORCE”…
Leo Lady shared this reality earlier…
“… Feeling overwhelmed and frightened at the unfamiliar intensity, I resisted it myself. It was as if a giant flood water had lashed itself onto me, and I felt the need to run away…”
Yep. Water puts out Fire in a hurry. Especially Penetrative water which is in a constant surge and it’s energy either merges, transforms or douses whatever exists in it’s path. Water is a ‘consistent’ energy while it is purifying and REFLECTIVE of our deeds. Water = the Eternal Soul ( if ever discovered through emotion… not pure reason ).
In contrast, Flames reach upward and aspire ‘upward’ toward the sky, (AWAY from ground and water) they kiss and play amid the flowing Air high above stagnant (pragmatic) Earth. The Fire-Air reality is of Intellectual & Idealistic orientation… which = The Head (Air) and the Heart (Fire).
So manifesting a balance of those four elements are gifted to us at birth, or they are not gifted. That balance determines the level of Mind-Body-Soul Consciousness… or our level of current evolution, in this lifetime.
hmm.. i think summing up earth as just being stagnant or pragmatic doesnt quite do it justice.
Earth has many fine qualities little Virgo.
Earth is:
Taurus–> the Builder/Developer… Virgo–> the tireless Worker Bee… and Capricorn–> the Public Authority figurehead, AT the workplace or in the career field.
So those three earthy sign-natures manifest energies of similar psyche and soul… which could be described as…. solid, structured, hard working plodders, self-disciplined and responsible financially.
Plenty of earth in ones nature are known to be super attached to money and materials. Fear pervades ones life if one feels financially unsafe. So accumulation happens. *** And btw, Cancer and Scorpio can be Equally obssessed to form as the three earth natures.
Earth are sensual lovers of lots of food, gifts, barter and trade, importing, exporting, accumulating “things” they don’t need but want. They love the feeling of deposits in the bank, predictable cuddles with one life partner and dining out 4 nights a week with minimal words spoken.
Simply put… earth is ‘Attached’ to Form… to tiny details in front of ones nose, they can eat and eat until they get really plump… then they groan at the world for others being “rail thin.”
Earth is slow to temper… unlike Fire and Air which will verbally joust with you for the excitement of it.
There you go little Virgin.
We ALL HAVE and NEED these essential qualities of Earth to “establish” (which btw, is another earth characteristic) or develop some level of STABILITY in our lives.
Humans live on this planet earth. So as mentioned a while back…. the first and only thing that humans think about most of their lifetime??
Survival. (attachment)
Earth and Water can have sharp resourceful knowledge in terms of making money, the VALUE of what money can bring to ones life which is COMFORT, EASE and SECURITY.
Those things make earth and water natural, mud bricks… to “Build” ones (safe and cozy) home. LoL.
hm that was lengthy.a bit bah-ha i gotta say. bit pigoenholed. gave me a laugh.but there ya go. sounds like you have had some boring dinners out with an earth sign.hehe.one way to look at it. dont know if that fits me to a t though. i have lots of sag in my chart and im on cusp of libra so..yes re the financial stuff. but i wouldnt say i was materialistic. nup. no more than you id say takin a hunch.workerbee..mm sometimes. like to have fun too.balanced life.
not plump n have my limits.not attached to form. just respect it. i think taureans are far more materialistic. dont reckon i plod either.
like mud though hehe!
thanks littl scorpion
That’s fine. I’ll know next time, to not respond to your non-existent ‘bah-ha’ and utterly original, useful, optimistic and meanigful perspectives so selflessly given to this blog.
And of course, your “well intended” contributions are certainly Not rigid, shortsighted and pigeonholed. As I said. Now I know.
A cynical brain full of fear, blinders and hypocrisy only make me seethe.
Oh how easy it is to say what you’ve just said. hahaha
Good night;)
“… dont know if that fits me to a t though…”
That’s right. You don’t know. subjective Ignorance is bliss.:)
i wasnt trying to upset you jeez. or make you seethe. i just didnt relate to alot of it as an earthsign. thats all. some of it i did and some of it i didnt.so i was just defending me. i still appreciate your input. and you dont know me so please dont make too many assumptions about me. like the blind, hypocritical, cynical etc etc. you paint a picture of me as a negative person, who is stagnant, boring, cynical, blind.. list goes on. you have never even met me. there is alot you do not know about me. you gotta admit some of what you wrote was funny. i wasnt laughing at you . look, i understand what you are getting at re the materialistic stuff, the attachment to money, success, things. i have listened to you since day one. and i agree. i am sensitive too hey.although you may not see it.i struggle with alot of similar stuff that you do.perhaps i just dont verbalize it so much.
virgo is a sensitive sign. according to the books true ruler is vulcan. like you said gotta look at whole chart. but virgos are very misunderstood,, alot like scorpios i think.
sorry i will word it more precisely this time..” it doesnt fit me to a t.” i am not ignorant.
why are you being so picky?
i apologise pluto puppy. dont know whats got into me today. i re read what you wrote and i can see you were only sharing something and it wasnt all bad. there was good there. maybe it was just that word stagnant that got me in the first place.and it all of a sudden locked in, being that was your first thought and so i put up a wall. cos i would see earth as being nonstagnant. moving actually. hmm maybe stagnant is how a dam of water feels sometimes. too much earth crowding in. every element can stagnate if isolated from other elements. can we throw mud pies? i am sorry..
I forgot to throw in Aries into that bunch of people fixated to “things”;)
All Pisces-Aries cuspers I have known… and all Aries-Taurus cuspers, Aries Sun, Cancer Rising, Capricorn Rising are just as fixated on playing the game to meet their material obsessions;)
Same could said with bunches of planets located in Houses: 2, 4, 6, 8, and especially 10.
This stuff is too intricate for me to cover in brief… that’s why I’ve edited my comments from day one.
Umm, it’s alright.
I may have glared at you too soon… my objectivity when speaking was NOT about you. It’s the way I see things collectively, from intensive personal experience. On occasion I have thrown in a few things I would normally never share to anyone, yet I choose too because they have proven great meaning in my life. You’re welcome to stop taking every darn philosophical word I say to heart. I’m only sharing. With Every-one. That’s it.
The wall you threw up was not necessary… and in fairness, Nor was my seething.
So all is good.
That’s the benefit of:
Inevitable ‘Harmony’ thru Conflict.
That’s how ‘Real’ bonds between people emerge.
It is the innate energy within me that I simply can’t switch off. Hey, we could not plug up a volcano from erupting, could we?
>> It’s WHO I AM.
yes.. you are the volcanus eruptus. the lava man.and i am the rock from which the oozy molten liquid flows… hehe. oops gaffa anyone?
Pluto:
I just ran my chart and would be in interested to know your experience and perspective to this:
Sun- Leo
Moon – Scorpio ( I love THIS!!)
Venus – Cancer
What do you think my characteristics and traits are with these placements? I will be honest and validate (or not) your views.
🙂
Lady Leo
Yes…well the 4 elements – air, water, earth and fire.
They have a symbiotic relationship with the other, and each is just as important.
The thing is to not take these symbols “literally”. They have to be felt. For example, when you feel the physical fire, it will not be the same as the elemental fire.
The level of expression of each of these elements in a person, is dualistic. Meaning, for a person who is “asleep”, they will have an “earthy” expression. For a person that is “awake”, they will have “etheric” expression.
There is a fifth element – wood. For me, it brings it all together. For others, it does not.
It is a different journey for everyone.
Again, it is not enough to FEEL the energy – you must learn to BE it. You can´t BE it, unless you have mastered your own “Duality”.
For other types of activities, purity is a must – this is a CHRISTIC journey and very difficult. Best we don´t go there. The tests are very subtle and one mistake will take you away from your goal. Again, there is no right or wrong with these things. It is just that you need to FEEL your DESTINATION as it marks your path and is the “backdrop” against the choices that come up and the “heart energy” to be applied.
I am sure that when everyone thought astrology when P.Puppy talked about the 4 elements, but I decided to add a different version.
Besides, this is all in Scorpios domain of things.
No…water does not put out fire, although everyone says so.
Water flows and its strength is based on quantity and momentum. There is more pressure on it, if the mind is “narrow”. Therefore, the explosions will be vast. It is the VIA that is important here.
If water puts out fire, it is because the VIA was wrong. I am sure that arctic water would prefer warmer temperatures (i.e. not ice cold), so understanding the benifits of each element is important. Fire can “warm up water”, once harmony through universal soul intentions are established. For example, if we all expressed ourselves through LOVE. Understand that expressing IS BONDING. Au natural. The rest is ELEMENTARY.
Fire – requires fuel to stay alive (wood). Too much fire, is destructive, and water would be the only thing that could “put it out”. But, not having the correct “AIR” is just as deadly. But we should not forget that fire, instead of consuming, can be generated under fusion and fision – and be self-sustaining.
Well, the general idea is that nobody should want to “put out” anybody. That is the responsibility we all have when we elementary interact with each other. Ignorance is no excuse…and therefore, we have to work on our “VIAS”.
Sounds a bit wacky, but I actually dream of this stuff.
Hmmmm…
Sorry, can´t resist saying it, but self – sustaining fusion and fission fire can warm up water…pretty quickly. It is the cosmic energy / life that runs through us.
It is the other extreme of the plutonic spectrum.
Under cosmic fire (and not earthly consuming bonfires), pluto is “warmed up” and fuzzy again. This is not actually due to the feminine powers of seduction and persuasion. It is due to the fact that the FLOW is much more powerful and they can be more of who they REALLY ARE. This is soothing and relaxing because there is no doubt about the trust.
So, in a sense, fire and water can keep each other flowing and warm. In a way, through pluto´s sense of purpose, the wood is provided for fire to “burn”.
Under Pluto´s dark universal energy, cosmic fire just does not “burn” for burning. Besides, Scorpio is very good at giving subtle undercurrent direction to the feminine “submissive” flame. This is the “masculine” purpose as well.
All “flamed up”, but nothing to “burn” and give life to.
Wood – is the transformative life giving energy, very scorpionic as well.
Scorpio knows where the “forest is” through their very wonderful gift of being able to perceive and expand the feminine and concentrative, channeling abilities. You are never alone with Scorpio – but you are expected to be able to last, endure and flourish under desert like conditions.
Expect those harsh, x-ray, seething, seeing you under your clothing gazes when you don´t.
Sometimes, its fun when you get those gazes.
So serious!!! So…how do you like your marshmellows again?
Darn it…he does not “do” marshmellows!!!
However, what he does “do” is based on very beautiful humanitarian drives that he most compassionately feels through his emotions. This means, that our suffering, is his suffering.
Our battle (true, raw, human struggles) is reflected in him. Therefore, if he “wins” his battle, he understands how to fight ours.
This is the Christ energy.
Surrender to a force greater than ourselves…is a process of being in the correct state of mind to be able to perceive the secrets of this force.
When you watch a movie, we in a way, have surrendered our active thinking processes (Broca´s area comes into effect though).
Imagine the 24 – 7 “get closer to GOD and join your mind to your heart” movie.
We give up our “mental processes” and…voila! The supossedly weak passive person is actually “receiving and becoming” the force greater than his/herself.
So…we just have to put those humanitarian concerns “on the burner” and give life to them.
“…You are never alone with Scorpio – but you are expected to be able to last, endure and flourish under desert like conditions…”
Yes. Beautiful and True.
Deep, meaningful love, was never meant to taste like sweet cupcakes.
We could also observe the energy of underwater welding. Fire alive, yet surrounded by water.
To simplify, it once again circles back to one’s intrinsic MOTIVATIONS.
Love…… or Manipulation??
Trouble is… most human beings in our societies are UNAWARE of their intent. Because in order ‘to survive’ in this world, one must “Manipulate” the energy of other people, and a circumstance, in each given moment.
So that manifestation of intent, IS BELIEVED TO BE (via the illusory personality)… ‘a Standard’ of normalcy.
When in fact, that perceived standard of normalcy, e.g… “hey everybody does it, so why shouldn’t I??” is what destroys ‘the incredible possibility’ in relationships.
So karma eventually proves that self-delusion is no myth, it’s just a matter of time before the (Unconscious) lies, agendas, trickery and underhanded tactics of “pure self-interest” become unveiled.
Love… behind the motivation is all. I don’t care how “mean” the ‘words’ or attitude seem.
Nothing in this life is what “it seems”
The hidden shall surface, eventually.
Hey Umm… Lava Man?? hahaha… I love it. My chart (nature) is rich with Water + Fire.
Whodathunkit. that = Malten Lava.
Oh, and of course there’s lots of fertile EARTH bubbling through that Lava.:)
Melting Earth??… wow, I’m in awe of such a divine thing.
yes . melting alright and flowing like custard. to be these earthlings that we are (lol) meanwhile at the core is bubbling lava ..always there..
far out..imagine if it was to suddenly just burst up whilst sitting on the couch..
“To simplify, it once again circles back to one’s intrinsic MOTIVATIONS.
Love…… or Manipulation??”
Yes, it certainly does.
However, it must be said, that for evolved scorpio, this is not an issue through their ability to detect “contrasts” on various levels. Meaning, the truth within the lie, the lie within the truth…and the intrinsic motives of each one.
Some people must “soulfully” lie – the scorpionic fork in the road choice between “real bad” and “your are going to hell” bad. This is how the phoenix rises from the ashes and creates.
The first impression however, is usually what determines the need to “investigate” as something “is up”.
In my case, people who had known us for years, believed the “lie” – and did not understand my silence (motivation). Why would I be quiet for so long?
But within the first 2 seconds that I met Scorpio, he decided that he was going to …stay for lunch … instead of leave.
You know what that means. LOL!!!
But this is what “melting earth” for me means.
Through the containment / stagnation of form (earth), one has the ability, through “explosions” and through the application of “LIFE / LIGHT”, to TRANSFORM / TRANSCEND it, and so that the end result, is that it transcends itself and flows.
YES!!! It is a part of the creative process and rising from the ashes!!!
And it requires “complete surrender”.
Once the blood cosmically “burns” in my veins…different rules apply and I know it is “ouchie time to go under” and operate from there.
It is nice that someone understands. It was getting lonely down there.
This is what I mean by you Scorpios…
Darn those X-ray vision super powers!!! LOL!!!
Oh well, I guess “THE KITTYCAT” is out of the bag.
Under drought, desert like conditions of zero ego / gravity, where a drop of water would be a real lifesave, your own sense of SELF, intrinsically feels that “something is up” (illusion).
You realize that the choice (seemingly external, reaching outward) will lead to more hypocrisy.
Christ energy can start to be perceived once you reach those “scorpionic fork in the road choices” and decide on… NEITHER…because both lead to stagnation and darkness.
So…the “sacrifice”.
…or the death of your own ego…for the sake of others. But it is not REALLY for the sake of others, but for the sake of the LIGHT that you KNOW the other person has.
Since you have battled your own HADES under this christ energy, …you can take the HADES of others, shoulder it on your back and battle it too…and bring people back through their traumatic experiences, but this time, absorbing it and shining a bit of light on it.
Taking NEGATIVE energy and TRANSFORMING it so that the other person can TRANSCEND his/ her HADES and FLOW again.
And we have come “full circle”, meaning, we are back where we started. And that is the Divine state of things.
Under this context, should we question whether someone REALLY LOVES the other?
“bursting whilst on the couch”…
What is causing this?
If you want to work with form…
…don´t release the plutonic darkness…release the cosmic fire.
If you want to work with the “etheric”, release the darkness…
The darkness allows you to see the truth from the lie, but it has no “creative power” in itself. I believe you have MARS to do that for you – right? (Not so good with astrology)
You must “FEEL the ELEMENTAL fire”.
I´d say that it would be time to add a bit of “wood” (purpose and transforming life giving FUEL) on that fire, feel where you want to be, and make it “transcendental”. The release, under the source, will not be on your time schedule. So you may have to hold in and “raise the frequency of your energy” while you are waiting by GIVING – outward energy flow.
This is called “MASTERING your passions”.
2 things that Scorpio has – their own plutonic darkness and the “lets share a bit of myself” to “those people who can not be trusted because their own darkness and bad intentions are literally screaming at you and slapping you in the face”!
Its “dark…dark…dark” EVERYWHERE!!!
Well, then you create more…destruction and darkness.
Raise the frequency of the energy means learning to apply spiritual alchemic principles through working with the elements. (These would be YOUR elemental make-up)
Eventually, you will not be facing destruction all around you. You will be facing “creation” or LOVE all around you.
Therefore, by your own fruits, shall you be known.
“So you may have to hold in and “raise the frequency of your energy” while you are waiting by GIVING – outward energy flow.”
Hmmmm…well I did forget to say something.
The word “giving” could be replaced by “abstaining by not releasing”…
Yup. Now yer REALLY gonna be all “flamed up”! (LOL!!!)
May the “Source” be with you.
Gatubela,
It would be wise of you to ‘know’ that most people around us do not live their busy daily lives, their desires of survival, from an ‘etheric’ reality.
Such people live each moment in Known Form. Of the Physical. Of the 5 senses.
So while your dreams may make perfect sense ‘to you’… I am sure that most people in your life and people reading your comments here, are just lost and bewildered of what you are attempting to get across.
One very important element of spritual understanding is ‘to know’ that each and every person we meet, was born with their OWN PATH to walk.
A powerful and CENTERED (or grounded) relationship with the Source… believe it or not… is…. A SILENT one.
My motivations, through my speech and action, are Not driven to Conform any-one onto my specific Path.
Away from this website, in the real word, I hardly speak a word.
So when Umm had mentioned “custard” we have no right “to correct” her… ‘and tell’ her to see an “etheric dream” she isn’t privy to or even interested in.
Knowing a duality, is knowing to “let it be”. Because if we are determined to always correct or ‘understand’ someone… our Intent… from that reaction is based purely on satisfying ones egostic idealism… while failing to honor the life, the psychology, the foibles and the essence AS IT REALLY IS, for another.
We must not unconsciously create ‘personality’ battles to satisfy baseless ego desires.
RESPONDING however… from THE SOUL… to ‘a legitimate’ threat or circumstance… is Justified and True. Big difference.
Short story:
Every Sunday morning and evening, across the street from my home… I hear… the loud bellowing voice … of a guy singing and yammering “his rapid inner monologue” with mic in hand… drilling “his Doctrine” AT the congregation of people sitting before him.
While he is jumping around, singing and carrying-on like a lunatic just released from Ward 14 of the local nut hospital, everybody applauds him, and sings and chants along with him.
Every Sunday morning and evening, like clockwork… I HEAR this guy from my home yammer on… but his “reality”—> through my Consciousness… is Not Real or Soul-Centered. I am sure that his (charitable)congregation HAVE NO CLUE as to what in the world he is raving on about. Yet, they nod their heads in approval, the audience raise their hands “praising the Lord” for his love and grace. (the Noun).
What’s the message in my example?
Let God work ‘through you’ by way of (Active)Humility. BE that INFLUENCE. Cease talking about it.
The Dalai Lama does not preach for the sake preaching.
His primordial essence (his GOODNESS) ‘feels’ the Divine with both feet planted firmly on THE GROUND.
The motivation ‘to conform’ (or to ‘make’ someone understand) does not heal anyone. All it Does is feed a starving ego.
We must never force anything upon anyone.:)
The Dalai Lama and Gandhi are two men who symbolized the meaning of not wasting words.
Their BEING, their Compassion, their Super-Societal Influence… IS (in the vast Plutonic realm) — Total Ego.
They “knew” of Death in Life, and Life in Death. They “knew” of Oneness within us and separation without us.
Yet they still did not set up shop and preach to anybody that would happily listen.
Christ (consciousness) “chose” not to assert his “knowing” while his hands and feet were ruthlessly nailed to a wooden cross. At that time and still pervading us today, a Christ Consciousness would not ‘choose to change’ mortality of thought and deed to those enraptured with loveless power.
Their meaningful Paths, their very Being, their message lives on forever. Those basic ‘men’ Are Eternal.
Hi P.Puppy,
In response to your comment … ditto.
My feet were (and are) on the ground, but my heart was (and is) in the heavens. My mind went blank and my fingers happened to be on the keyboard (this time).
The women in this forum have suffered greatly.
Knowing duality (from one extreme to the other)
…is balance.
Not letting it be.
I will “take” my “instructions” from the Source, and I won´t trust my ego…or yours for that matter – even if I do think you are one great guy.
Thank you for your very valid concern.
I wonder if any pisces or scorpio here experienced the feeling of meeting a long lost friend the first time they met 😀
Haha yeah. It must seem like two fruitcakes talking on an arranged date during the middle of a strangers wedding ceremony.
I’ve only wanted to not hog the blog. Looks like that idea will require me to take a very long silent break from writing.
Best wishes people. Enjoy your holidays, & Happy new year;)
hey pluto puppy, you are not hogging so dont worry. i am busy painting and not getting caught up in xmas.
i have two houses of flashing lights and plastic father xmas’ stuck in lawns across the road from me. thankfully nobody garbling with a microphone. that would drive me insane. be good if you were here we could hide out together and eat custard. have a nice new year too 🙂
by the way.. it is not often i come across people who have that ” knowing” you were talking about. knowing without preaching without having to prove. the eternal. yes. humble. that is a very pure existence.thankyou for sharing that. especially now in this crazy time with people running around wearing antlers and being ridiculous. i even saw a car with them on. strange planet.
After months and months of contemplation, I finally “submitted” to a Scorpio and did not expect anything in return. He eventually came back with a more sincere force that I cannot repel. The power of submission is unbelievable. Thanks P.P.It is going to be a fantastic holiday month.
p/s: when pisces (me) and scorpio meet, everything else in between us cannot get any real and true.the magic is within us and hell yes,we both know and accept it.the fruitcake description is funny and very spot on.
Pluto:
Please DO NOT stop posting here. I love your insight, and would miss your sharing immensely. Please reconsider.
I appreciate Gatubela’s insights as well, even though its difficult to understand her writing…sooooo deeeepppp. I LOVE learning…and if you stop posting, I will be left in ignorance :), so please keep coming back….what if I meet another Scorpio and you are not here to guide me through the underworld? I will be left to my own Leo devices….and NO BODY wants to see THAT!
Hugs:)
Hi Everyone –
Well, this is a Scorpio site. I am not even a Scorpio.
I will stop now.
I hope that you reconsider as well – your contribution is extremely valuable to the readers of this forum. They need someone like you – who is a Scorpio and who understands and cares.
I have enjoyed my time here.
the dirty rotten buggers have put posts all along the beach. building a fence. its hideous. assholes.what right do they think they have. mucking up the beach.it is so naturally beautiful and now they want to turn it into suburbia. its going to bite them in the bum
Gemini dating Scorpio male for 3 years. Confusing but fulfilling relationship, to say the least! We are both 30 years old and I am ready to get married. Any advice on how to cautiously proceed without scaring him off?
Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
“… Any advice on how to cautiously proceed without scaring him off?…”
Scaring him off??
3 full years huh?… and the confusion part?– Oh I believe that.
Yet this is what your “relationship” has culminated into??… being worried if you’ll… “scare him off”??
Are you hunting wabbits or something??
Isn’t marriage about WE??? and not about–> I ???
Seems like the psychology of your isolated relationship consists of two shallow strangers who don’t know each other from a block of ice.
Trickery… according to the meaning/motivation laced through your question… Wins out.
But I am kind. Yes, it happens to be your reality, so it is no trick.
Enjoy the shock of your ‘plan’ when Truth finally does collapse the facade of your “caution”
LOL. Marriage isn’t a game. Nor is manipulating your partner into thinking the relationship itself is special.
Without communicating a single trace of self-honesty of ones TRUE MOTIVATIONS, what does one seriously think they will get in return??… hmm, long term Financial Security??
He will discard you once he tires of your falsity. —>>> UNLESS of course, the guy himself values and relates to himself, life and you, in the exact same way.
Ever tried talking ‘to him’… not us, minus the agenda?
You wanted advice. Enjoy;)
Merry Christmas Pluto Puppy! 🙂
Merry christmas to everyone 🙂
Hey Faith)- if you’re still out there…
… you had asked me a question way back on post 239 regarding the male Scorpio “test”
My response above to LadyGemini may seem to come across a wee bit harsh. Believe me… I could have chosen to fluff-up words and talk strategy with her, and then I could have told her “exactly what she wanted to hear”…
… Yet as all people should know by now. That is not me.
Women test men. Relentlessly.
Please observe L.G’s question above. It’s desire.
Her innocent question is a perfectly live, real world demonstration of HOW women Think everywhere. I kid you not.
I’ve mentioned this perception in prior posts. The “personality” is “UNconscious” throughout life, it is Sleeping… Until… it is awakened and the veil of it’s illusions are then lifted.
In my world, Women test men at least once every 30 minutes, of every day, of every week, of every month and year… Til Death.
Yet most men don’t know this.
A sprinkle of her tests each day are a ‘Fully Conscious’ manifestation… however… the majority of a woman’s testing originates ‘Subconsciously’ in her psyche, while talking to each man around her, in her environment.
If women would just take the time to objectively witness ‘their own moods’ and also witness ‘their communication’ toward men and people… they will be startled at what they deeply “See” —>> about themselves.
Still, that detached “knowing” requires a woman to be BOLDLY HONEST with her own controlling desires. She must practice witnessing the acknowledgement felt of her fears of losing control.
Women need to witness their moment by moment expression in order to understand their Crankiness, mental patterns, emotional disillusionment… or what I like to call….. “Tests”
Yet almost every woman on the planet cannot see those manifestations in the moment.
That is why God gave you the male Scorpio.
Regards
Pluto.
Compassion with a glare;)
hello pluto. hope you had a nice xmas. i surrendered to it. had my family for lunch. was nice actually.lots of yummy food.
i feel good. and what you said above .. its like peeling. tests are getting to the truth of things. through action. and outcome. yes. the male scorpio.what i love about scorpio is their tireless strength, their persistence and loyalty. their innate wisdom.my mother is one. she is amazing.the awareness that she has.
hmm..yeah . whateva
.
Very good, soulful insights Phoenix. I appreciate that individuality.
And no your husband musn’t be weak in that he found you. He is a lucky (or fated) guy.
Thanks for being you.:)
And Umm,
I haven’t forgotten about you. Your grace and goodness.
Ya never know, maybe one day we will hide out together and munch on some custard.
Love Pluto.
pluto,
yes you never know..
a massive cyclone is about to hit the coast soon. there is a full on charge in the air and im not close. ive been reading a book about end of world.. so all a bit freaky.
Dating a scorpion man for about 7 months. we have talked about future and about me moving to his country, live together before marriage. Just right after we were intimate, he wants to slow down and be friends because his current focus is on his career and he is constantly thinking of me that loses his focus. He works at a very demanding and time consuming job. I replied his email by supporting and understanding that he needs to focus on his work and personal issues and I am willing to take it slow while he deals with all that. It’s been 2 weeks, have not heard form him. My gut tells me that he is still thinking, analyses my information. I just found out that he is still active on the dating website we met (not sure how accurate the information was since I am constantly showed online while I haven’t been using the website since I met him. Why does he shut down in communication? And what should I do in the meantime?
Plutonian mystery. The old theme of cold isolation chilling down a warm and confused bunny happens again. What are you to do? Well, a practical answer could be to share your warmth about town, be brave, feel comfortable alone in a coffee shop or bookstore, or pumpkin festival … then who knows… out of nowhere… a Dashing Knight may notice your feminine wiles.
He may talk to you self-assuredley, while peering deeply into the windows of your innocent soul. He may listen intently to your wayward bunny troubles. After that first shot of espresso, he might share with you his extra-ciricular hobbies such as slaying dopey dragons and saving those damsels in distress.
But you’re no damsel. Set him straight on that. Tell him you could knock him out with a frying pan any day of the week. Show him the 9mm Glock nestled inside your purse. That should set the tone for the rest of the night.
Just say No to foreplay, frolic and his funny business because that dress needs to stay on your body tonight. Intimate? Sure he wants to see the dress on your living room floor. But he’ll have to earn that chemistry by way of his deadly responses to your coy goodness. Be a smoldering challenge, indecisive Libra. Have an edge about you. He will adore you for it.
It’s real cold here on Pluto. The Sun looks so dim, a dot- flickering in the distance. It’s amazing my laptop has any service. Aren’t we lucky.
Hi confusedlibra.
hard one to answer. he said he wants to be friends.after you were intimate.i gather you dont spend much time together living in separate countries. was it always like that? tricky.he sounds serious if he talked about marriage.. but maybe he is keeping his options open. i dont know.you need to ask him questions to find the answers of how he truly feels now.. and if he doesnt answer that may tell you something too. meantime try to enjoy your life, which i know sometimes is hard if you are wanting connection with him and he is unwilling. keep yourself strong and keep doing what makes you happy.
Yeah, I know Forum…”The Cat Came Back”. Actually, this is a rather tragic children´s song by Fred Penner – who happens to be Canadian born in Winnipeg, Manitoba.
Hi C.L…
We are dealing with Scorpio, and there is no grey with Scorpio …in love. So he is either VERY into you or he is NOT.
Scorpio also deals with mastering oneself as various emotional extremes surface from the depths of their very still oceans, requesting (well it is more like “do or die DEMANDING”)transcendance or transformation as to find “completeness” and peace. This energy asks that you journey inwards and not outwards. Hence those silent periods. He has no words to express it, because it “soulful”. The language is not verbal, so don´t “look” or “hear” for explanations. You must FEEL them first. Once you feel them, then try to talk, but not before.
So, Scorpio does not “think” when it comes to making a decision. They FEEL. But in the case of your Scorpio, you are the distraction.
I would not want to be the “distraction” of anyone and I would find this extremely crushing. Sometimes we have to PREFER feeling and battling in order to find the transcendence so necessary for growth.
Scorpio knows this more than anyone.
On the other hand, I feel that you must ask yourself why he considers you a distraction to his professional goals? Why are you a distraction after becoming intimate, and not before? Are you able to put your feelings “on the burner” due to his “priorities”? If you have spoken about marriage, would this be considered him being “serious” about you? How do you feel about being a life partner but not an active “supporter” in his life, and a distraction to it?
Gentle Love goes beyond most of the comments in your post, and should be the fertile soil in which both of you decide to “plant” your engagement.
Find it within yourself first. I feel that there is much for you understand about him. This is a beautiful and magical part of any relationship. He should feel comfortable in sharing his “journeys” with you. As I have said before, feel him, don´t listen. With one look at you, his feelings and vulnerabilities should be there.
Hmmmm…
A nine Glock is not smooth on the trigger, but that extra friction may give you extra milliseconds to think before pulling…and they come with a lot of extra goodies…
I have other preferences…and they aren´t stored in my purse!!!
Just thinkin´out loud.
wow.. i just came across this about sun conjunct pluto, which is what i have. dont know if anyone else has this, but i can so relate..(big breath out)
Sun conjunct Pluto
There is a distinct intensity to people born under a Sun-Pluto conjunction. Self-knowledge and psychological transformation are their goals. Because the ego is attached to the transformative Pluto, these people undergo many periods of self-renewal. They submit themselves to frequent periods of intense self-analysis.
Perhaps even more obvious than Sun-Pluto people’s intensity is their distaste for superficiality, and their ability to “read” others almost instantly, tapping into their motivations effortlessly. They quickly read between the lines, and although this helps them to experience a deeper dimension of existence, the focus may be a little too dark or negative. They are determined to uncover the truth, but when this aspect is challenged by other planets, this “truth” may be biased on the side of negativity. They can be so obsessed to prove that something is wrong, and that things are not as they appear, that it becomes an obsession. In fact, they can be very self-destructive. This is largely due to a fear that they are being taken advantage of or being lied to. Refusing to accept things at face value and mistrusting others’ motivations can lead these people to work hard at proving these fears! The result can be self-fulfilling prophecies, and the natives can feel very much alone. People born under the Sun-Pluto conjunction need to consciously work on this tendency to search for the negative. It is quite an experience to watch a person with Sun-Pluto in their charts finally uncover a wrongdoing. It’s almost as if they are reborn and entirely relieved! Take for an example a Sun-Pluto person who is married and suspects his spouse is having an affair. The suspicion can be all-encompassing, and uncovering the truth takes on a life of its own. When the truth is finally uncovered, there is a huge sense of release. This is not to say that the truth isn’t painful to these people. It is. But the period of “not knowing” (but suspecting) was even more painful!
On the same lines, there is an expression, “What you don’t know can’t hurt you”. Sun-Pluto people don’t agree. For them, what they don’t know (but suspect) can hurt them–to the point of obsession. It hurts to need to know the truth, and to be suspicious just because things seem to be “too good to be true” or too happy.
It is important for Sun-Pluto people to recognize their self-destructive behaviors. With the conjunction, these people live and breathe Pluto. With any conjunction to the Sun, the planet is so instinctive that it can be hard to even identify with it. It can easily be one’s “blind spot”. But identifying the qualities of that planet is the first step to mindful living. With Sun-Pluto, the first step is to identify the Pluto energy in one’s life, and then to channel it into positive avenues. There is a strong desire for an added dimension of experience in the life. Ordinary and accepting is boring to Sun-Pluto people. They need more, and they can attract challenges in their lives–life-changing ones–because of this hunger for another layer of experience. They need to learn to let go of things in their lives that are preventing them from moving forward. Positive channels for Pluto energy can be such things as research (where their skills as “detectives” can be put to good use) or counseling (where their ability to understand people is appreciated).
These people attach meaning to even the most ordinary of experiences. They often have much sexual vitality and passion. In fact, the orgasm itself has the qualities of emotional intensity and concentration, as well as a death/rebirth experience (sometimes referred to as the “little death”), that is very Plutonic. These people are capable of profound insights, and they usually possess healing powers. They’re talented at getting to the heart of the matter, or finding the “bottom line”, and their lives are likely to be fascinating. These people are learning to be fearless. They may struggle with this at times, but they might find that conquering their fear of their own power, or their own “dark side” is most of the battle.
“These people are learning to be fearless.”
A very powerful sentence – if one truthfully and soulfully applies it and becomes it. It requires great surrender and tremendous self-knowledge, no attachments and purity of vision and purpose.
Wow!
That is why soulful “scorpionic” silences can be so beautiful.
A strong male presence has a noise and language of its own.
“…These people attach meaning to even the most ordinary of experiences.”
O yes. For sure. It actually makes life more difficult when one can See in the Dark.
To most, seeing in the Dark would be felt to be a Curse. The Dark is mostly acknowledged as a terrifying reminder of our planet’s stark cruelty, it’s deception, betrayal and corruption. I now appreciate the sight of those realities, for now I know the eternal power of Choice.
I’m no longer hoodwinked. What I see in the mundane, what I grasp within the human condition is a Truth, a Meaning and Gratitude. Because the Dark no longer has Power over my Subconscious mind. I now adopt that Power to heal myself and others where I can.;)
one of those humor style horoscope on scorpio i just read..
Character
Scorpios are not to be trusted – definitely not with money. Send a Scorpio to buy something as trivial as the morning paper and he’ll claim that the coins fell into the gutter, or that he gave them to a little old lady in dire need. The new packet of cigarettes bulging out of his back pocket is a dead giveaway though. The thing is that while Scorpios are extremely shrewd, they can be hopelessly careless and often forget to hide their sting.
Luckily for them, charm is one trait Scorpios have plenty of. Scorpios ooze charm so thick that you could scrape it off and give it to Grandma to use as denture adhesive. This is the secret of their success (not to mention survival). No matter how blatantly obvious Scorpios’ malicious intentions may appear at times, they can talk themselves out of practically any situation. Anyone who remains with their partner in spite of catching them cheating red handed for the 10 th time, is most definitely dating a Scorpio!
Scorpio politicians are essential to any political party. Their power of subtle persuasion is the only reason why a government can last more than a week in power without being lynched. If you’ve ever been completely ripped off, it surely was not a Scorpio. With a Scorpio, you’d never notice!
Scorpios define a friend as anyone who can be used to their own advantage. Friends define Scorpios as someone to be wary of. While it may seem that Scorpios do have many friends, the company they keep is actually constantly changing. If you belong to a Scorpio’s inner circle, be on your guard!
You never know when the axe will fall.
Scorpios are very suspicious of everyone around them. Clinically paranoid is a better description in most cases. Their greatest fear is of being murdered. Their greatest unfounded fear is of choking on a sugar-coated peanut.
Love
Scorpios are very passionate by nature, but also very selfish in love. Fail to please a Scorpio and you will be dumped in the middle of the night. When a Scorpio gives a gift, he’s expecting 10 times back in return – plus interest. So if it’s a diamond ring or a trip to Hawaii, refuse it immediately.
A Scorpio becomes particularly suspicious when love is involved. Get back 10 minutes late from walking the dog, and prepare for a full spotlight interrogation of why, where, when and how, but especially whom with. One way of avoiding this is to be really nice, loving and reassuring when you return. An even better way is not to date a Scorpio.
Scorpios think their ideal partner is anyone extraordinarily rich and astoundingly sexy. Nobody’s ideal partner is a Scorpio.
Money
Money is a high priority for Scorpios, but not quite essential since they can use their charm to obtain almost anything they want. Scorpios don’t usually shop online because current technology is not able to transmit charm in digital form.
Future
Power! Wealth! Maybe even fame! Such is what lies in store for any Scorpio who lives up to their name. And they will need plenty of all that because it takes a lot of distraction to repress the feeling of utter loneliness.
Scorpio s make many enemies and have to be extremely careful not to ever let down their guard. Many Scorpios who do not choke on sugar-coated peanuts are murdered by their so-called friends or jilted lovers.
Famous Scorpios
Prince Charles, Theodore Roosevelt, Bill Gates
Ideal jobs
Scorpios are successful politicians, bankers, entrepreneurs or assassins. They also make great Royals, but very few vacancies ever arise.
I wanted to put the 1000th comment in!!! (hope no one puts one in before I finish)
“Get back 10 minutes late from walking the dog, and prepare for a full spotlight interrogation of why, where, when and how, but especially whom with.”
LOL!!! But they forgot to mention the eagle “look” that comes with that.
It makes your tail quiver, nose twitch and you tremble in yer bunny booties!
…”Scorpio’s make many enemies…”
No. The many enemies, make us.
I think my new profession will be contract killing.
May as well snuff out one blind injustice at a time.:)
yes. sounds like a profession that would suit. I think you have finally “hit” it. now thats what i call self actualization.
Or…
From the soaring Eagle’s perspective:
We will find Harmony through Conflict.
Who is the Scorpio with no inner conflict? He or she is the passive marshmallow, drifting out to sea, coddled in the safety net of the cultural mind.
Swoop.
Julian Assange. know who he is?
his chart is dominated by pluto… scorpio rising, scorpio moon, scorpio in jupiter. so pluto and jupiter dominated. then moon.
mars in aquarius. pluto in virgo. born 71. metal pig. ( same as me) same pluto and moon and mars. same chiron in aries. anyway .. other differences obviously. ha oh to have his skills..
i have great respect for this man.
here is someone who is harnessing pluto power in all its greatness.respect for ultimate truth.
he certainly is no marshmallow even if his hair is white.
The Battlefield that is my Soul.
If I were to write a book or screenplay concerning the evolution of Scopionic holocaust and nirvana… that would be my movie title.
To me, we are fully alive in our skin, while in blood pulsing nuclear mind-heart-soul regeneration.
In comparison, we are dead dimwits inside for the accumulation of material yearnings numbed by excessive intakes of alcohol, food, pot, sex, t.v, media, people calculation/agenda, pretense, false public image or narcotics.
Numbing or escaping our human Shadow through those choices enhances ones pain. They make the reality of ones Shadow much more elusive, feared and mismanaged.
Laughing right back into Hades face while stone cold sober is awe inspiring strength of psyche and heart. Any man who can rise up out of the ashes and transform his very essence is a living miracle in my book.
He has become the living verb of… I am God, and… He is Me.
As does any human being having this same human right. I have learned we all have different paths to walk. Most are simply not built for the miracle of death and rebirth over and over again.
More gratitude.:)
write that book. that screenplay. i could draw pictures for it.film it..
i wonder whether dying so much is like preparation. same as rebirth.
be nice to learn to fly huh.. you know with wings.fly over all the rooftops.all those televisions and neat houses and blah blah and glide under the stars and the moon and feel weightless.
LOL…!
I have seen some pretty interesting birdies fluttering about. They think I can´t see them.
So cute.
I’m a Taurus and have been dating a Scorpio for 3 years now. We’re also both 16 year olds. As to why our relationship works? Beats me. I’m just being myself and I guess it works because two Scorpios are after me (including boyfriend). They were both born on the exact date
Both crazy about me. But I’m only crazy about my boyfriend ❤
Hi Gigi,
“As to why our relationship works? Beats me. I’m just being myself and I guess it works because two Scorpios are after me (including boyfriend)”
Two Scorpios after you? This is a mind boggling first for me. Have you understood the “why” of “Scorpio N° 2”?
I only knew one Scorpio when I was 16. I met him because he was dating a friend (and eventually, he had many other girlfriends) and of course, all of us always hung out. We were good friends and talked alot, probably because I was not his type anyways as I was always doing sports and walking around in running shoes and sweats.
Well…you are 16 and have many experiences before you. I hope that you appreciate and treasure as best as you can, every moment and experience given to you.
bah hah. whatever. go jump.you will never get it.
Hi GiGi,
Well, alright…I did start thinking about your interesting situation.
You probably need to take “eagle swoop – scorpio hades” self defense classes. You won´t find those in the internet nor in your neighbourhood gym.
Interesting “divine feminine” skills are a pre-requisite, before embarking on this journey. As P.Puppy has mentioned in his very special way…Scorpios do give their “seed”. Are you able to make this seed grow into more? Are you also able to be it and become it as well?
Some Scorpios forget that the journey was hard enough for them, so they may not be tolerant to a woman´s struggles with the same energy that was in their seed. (I stick my tongue out at them. They are just being meanies – LOL!!!)
Hmmm – beyond Holocast and Nirvana…what is there? Jesus Christ – Absolutely got off track
Well, anyways, you are still alive and well. Good for you!!!
Hi again GiGi,
While we may be getting completely off with regards to your reality, pondering over your situation made me feel like saying something… (oh oh 🙂
I may blush a bit by putting it in words, but it is really not very “blushy” at all.
Male Scorpionic energy is very sexual. And although that has been one of the main themes in this forum, and the fact that women enjoy this aspect of them or expect it, I would like to add a different element to it.
Most women would “boo” me by saying this, but the “act” itself is not necesary to create.
Life is required, and your ability to see it anywhere, even microscopically, is required in order to grow it. Since this world is such a great place (yay!) to live in, the ability to see LIFE in DEATH could be a benifit.
These are no small words…if you analyze them carefully.
The reason being, lies in the opposite scenario. If you can not see the seed of LIFE in this stagnant form that we all are limitted by, you will manifest more of the same.
Scorpio sexual energy (masculine – and I am not blushing!!!) if perceived and depolarized by love (divine feminine energy)…is…WOW!
That is, if the male scorpio Nº 2 is “swooping” his seed on you.
Feminine (TRUE LOVE in its highest form) energy – can have an awesome power in “DEPOLARIZING” the masculine.
It is perspective…again, for why fluffy bunnies suffer from Scorpionic Fever – high temperatures…but why are you shivering?
True Feminine Love energy is UNCONDITIONAL by the way.
No controlling energies allowed.
When was the last time you looked at the person you loved and told them that you love them because they had nothing physical or material to offer you and meant it?
Try and answer this question, even if it sounds odd and strange.
If the answer is “never” or “not possible” or an array of justifications as you tell me about how life and reality REALLY is, then you will be unable to understand what I am talking about.
…and…
If a man or woman have nothing physical or material to offer (ignoring any (toxic)psychological co-dependency issues), what is love then?
True love should revolve around the answer to this question.
In matters of True Love and Being, Divine reality could (should) influence your physical reality, and not the other way around.
Even if everything you see in this world is rather “deathly”.
***This is only my personality in a romantic relationship. This is not how I interact with anyone else but my lover. I have the attitude that every women should be treated as an equal. Men should know a woman’s worth. I truly believe that every woman is a goddess and should never settle for less than what she deserves. ***
Yes, another text-book example…except the sex…
I got lost in this whole thread. I never believed that someone’s personality and inner self could be determined by when and where they were born. I’m a Capricorn, and only about 25% of their descriptions looked like me. Actually, the description of who I am is 90% of what astrology says about Scorpio-Male. I thought that was confusing… So I decided to have an outsider’s opinion on what is going on in my situation.
I am a young Capricorn, and he is only 4-5 years older than I am. His age would be considered young to me (Capricorn prefer older men for numerous reasons). From his photographs, I could clearly see that he had personality, humor, and confidence. I wasn’t expecting him to be so multi-layered, like me. I could read everything about him so easily in his eyes…Like his thoughts were stamped on his forehead! Just like a Scorpio, my eyes are deep, intense, mysterious, and emotional. It is normal for someone to be fixated on my eyes. The thing is, that this Scorpio guy isn’t afraid of me holding that gaze endlessly, without blinking. I’m really not sure if either of us really blinked. It made me feel like he was so sure of himself. It was so openly expressed, like, “Yeah baby, you can look all you want!”.
I thought that I got lucky, and finally met someone worth experiencing! “Mistress to many, girlfriend to none”, is what my romance life has been like. The description of how Scorpio are in the bedroom is exactly me. I’m naturally always the more dominant/alpha in a relationship. He may be a big guy, but even other people can sense that I’m in control. I usually get tired of someone, mainly because I don’t feel like they really fulfill what I need mentally and physically. Emotionally we can become so close that we can still be friends and communicate on a different level when I don’t want to see them romantically anymore. All of my relationships are weird like that. I’ve never had a real traditional boyfriend/girlfriend relationship.
The first time Scorpio tried to kiss me, I sat there with my eyes staring neutrally at him without accepting the kiss. He quickly realized that I was staring at him and pulled back, embarrassed and shocked. He apologized and quickly tried to start up the conversation again. I interrupted him and told him “No, it’s not that I don’t want to kiss you…It’s just that I want to be the one to kiss you”. I could see his eyes burn up with some anger, like, “Who the f*ck does this stuck up little princess she is to tell me that!”. If it weren’t for his eyes, it looked like he was fine about it.
Not sure how much detail would just be considered, “too much info”… Scorpio ended up being all talk when it came to sex. He said things like, “Girl, you have no idea what I’m packing “, and “I don’t think you’re ready for this”…. and he said them under his breathe, as if I couldn’t hear that! When he showed me what he was packing he wasn’t lying. It looked like a monster! He bragged and said that he was briefly in the adult entertainment industry. Then he asked me what I thought about how it looked. I don’t know how he didn’t feel stupid, because I never answered his question verbally…I was impressed but I I wasn’t going to give him a compliment because he asked for one. Yup, total brat when it comes to how my relationships are. There was this whole obvious power struggle of him trying to control me and make me do what he wanted me to do…Which was just the take it. I’m definitely not into that. I had my own ideas, and that’s what we were going to do. With some huge physical effort, on my part, but he eventually gave in and let me take over. It was more like his eyes were starting to roll back and he couldn’t keep up anymore… Kinda turned a little into putty. Disappointed, I slowed down and just stopped, because it was better if we just took a break then. When we sat up, he was having a hard time catching his breath and said out loud things like, “Oh my God, wow”. I had nothing to say, so I didn’t say anything. Even for a demo version, I was not impressed with the sex. I read on an astrology forum that Scorpio may be the only true sign that can handle Capricorn’s. That is why I am looking for a Scorpio male. I need an Alpha man because I meet someone to match up to me in sexuality, at least equal or more. I thought he was going to be the one to be my perfect sex match, but it just seemed alright.
This Scorpio matches everything in the profile except for sex. Has this ever happened before? At this point I’m already in and want to keep seeing him. He may not have been my greatest sexual encounter, but I feel like he could still be a really good match and be able to meet me 50/50. If we could learn to be in sync easily, this would be perfect…Because I don’t think either of us will be willing to submit to the other. I am very frightened that he may be able to, at some point, manipulate my mind… It would hurt. It’s worth it for me to pursue this, because I know this will be a real challenge for me. Maybe that’s just what I need!
, Stubborn-High-Standards-SeekingEqualCapricorn
Pants,
I’m sure you won’t encounter a shortage of male Scorpio suitors who are willing to woo you out of your sex pants.
Be cautious of who you jump, or you just may get that freakish mind manipulation while being penetrated (on many levels besides sex of course).
If you are courting a Scorpio male who acts as deeply and complex as…… “Girl, you have no idea what I’m packing,– “I don’t think you’re ready for this”… I say, good for you woman. The Goat get’s exactly what she asked for. Especially after evaluating such evolution from a photograph. LoL. Yes… We ARE who we associate with.
And for the record: Just by looking at a photograph doesn’t reveal ones personality. That is called a skin-deep illusion. Nothing new or revolutionary. Those kinds of blind perceptions are the fast track to Hell with male Scorpio… and it is a date with mind numbing debauchery and emotional meaninglessness itself.;)
Then again, you may subconsciously ‘Want’ the journey into Hell.
The powers that be work in mysterious ways.:)
Pluto,
Is there a way I can contact you off the thread?
Pants…
Any questions you may have for me, should be directly answered by the male you are toying with.
Still, he may be incapable of answering your stealth motivated questions with a clear soul-honesty… so test the waters, hear each word spoken, see each act/response manifested by him and that will demonstrate what he and you are truthfully all about.
Frankly… even in your short descriptions of things, I see very little genuine courage, self-honesty and substance in the context of the dynamic. Sex, money, image and power games to control one-another is not real love. That’s just me.
Have you asked yourself if you want love? … or is it a false sense of security you are ‘projecting’ in the relationship?… Only you know those answers. Reflect and feel.
So Pants, male Scorpio… is the source and the captain behind the wheel of his own personal mind reality. Even if the mindset and intentions only point back to superficial motor-boat sex.
Uncover truths by communicating zealously with him, be strong and choose your life.
My Truth has been on the table since post 41.:)
Hi…Yuz wears the Pants…
Well…no you don´t.
But anyways, you must make sure that your “woman pants” are tied tightly on because it seems that you are only wearing your “pan-ties”.
A pity that Dr. Ruth is not here, as she could give you superior “on top” advice about your monstrously well endowed issues dealing with Mr. Scorpio.
However, I would like to clarify what it means for me…to be wearing MY frilly feminine pants in a relationship.
Well…it would have meant accepting that first kiss and to have died and gone to heaven, and then making sure that you did the same for him in return. Even if it meant battling his Hades.
If that did not put you straight, it would have meant lovongly understanding and dealing with Mr. Scorp´s anger. Even if you do not understand his (under) world, your SOULFUL WILLINGNESS to go there, could have gotten you an invite.
But honestly…the real truth of the matter is…(Evolved) Scorpio makes love to you much before you even know it, and taking into account those “Powers that Be”, it may have happened before you even laid eyes on each other.
So, perhaps you have met your match…but due to your fears that he may “manipulate your mind” I would listen to that first. There must be something to manipulate.
Therefore, before the inevitable occurs, try and live in this beautiful world, instead of controlling it.
I applaud your honesty. But remember, under Plutonic energy, who you are and what you are made of…will be reflected back to you 10 fold.
Hi Everyone…
I think I have read almost every message in this thread. The information in here has been educational, inspiring and reassuring to say the least. There are some very wise people here.
I apologize in advance for how long this is 🙂
I would like to share my own story about my journey with “my” Scorpio man. I put the “my” in quotes because we are not actually together in a romantic relationship. The kind of relationship we have is like nothing I have experienced before. It began about six months ago. We went out on a date and had a good time together, but the next evening, we were in bed together! Hoo boy…that was not the sort of thing I had EVER done before. I definitely chalk my behavior up to being in a literally sexless marriage for three years just prior to that. Something inside me snapped I guess. So…after the first time we were together, I thought I had experienced my first one night stand and I felt just horrible…but this was not to be the case. What ensued was about five months of on/off push/pull come-here-go-away from both of us as we struggled to understand the intense, overwhelming physical attraction we both felt towards each other and to deal with it BEFORE any kind of foundation of trust and friendship had been built between us. He would always call me and text me eventually after a week or so, but since a pattern had been established from the beginning, I always felt the reason he would come back was for sex. He says I’m the best he’s had…I know he means it. The same is true of him for me. Hands down.
We have since had some great conversations and his willingness to iron out any problems or misunderstanding that exist between us is amazing. We have had some pretty big misunderstandings between us, but he is always able to calm me down and make me feel better. But this communication has only really happened within the last month and a half or so. It has taken this long to get to the point where we are finding that we actually get along, share a ton of common interests, and generally enjoy each others’ company. To be honest, he is the most incredible man I have ever met for other reasons that I wont get into, but…and he has told me this recently…I don’t give him “the butterflies”. He told me that he doesn’t get it because, as he put it “You look so good on paper. You have everything I would want, but I just don’t feel it. It sucks!”. That hurt to hear, but I appreciated his honesty. He mentioned several times earlier in our relationship that we could be “something more”. He wanted to give it a try, but it always turned into sex again, and every time after sex he would pull away for days and I was left feeling pretty awful…because I started to fall for him a long time ago and the sex made me get too attached too soon.
I finally feel like we are getting to the point where we are developing a friendship and an understanding, but there is still sex involved and it feels to me like it is the priority for him. I don’t think either one of us wants to give it up, but I would be more than willing to for awhile just to allow the friendship to grow between us. It never works though. Oh and another thing…this come-here-go-away thing was something that happened with an old ex girlfriend of his too. Apparently he ended up hurting her so badly that they didn’t speak for years. He told me he promised himself he wouldn’t do that to anyone else again…except he did do it again…with me. He has told me a thousand times that he won’t settle for less that what’s perfect…the perfect partner. He has Virgo rising, Venus in Virgo and Juno in Virgo…so I believe him! I have the sinking feeling that I could never be what this man considers “good enough”. I don’t know if anyone could though.
So anyway, I don’t know how to proceed. I feel like our relationship has improved drastically and the communication is very good, but I need to know if I am clinging to a false hope with this one. He can’t seem to let me go, but he can’t give me what I want either, which is a deep emotional and spiritual connection. Let me rephrase that…he is more than capable of giving it I KNOW, but he doesn’t want to with me. I think it’s because we got physical too soon, which I deeply regret especially since it was entirely out of character for me. I feel like if we could go back and build a friendship, then we could actually have a chance of having the emotional connection that we both want.
So what do you think? Does this have a chance of turning into something more as we spend more time and get to know each other or am I just being foolish? Does the continued sex hinder the growth of a friendship with a Scorpio the same way it does with other signs that aren’t this sexual? Is all lost because of the way the relationship began? Patience is not one of my virtues (Aries Moon!), but I would wait forever for this one. One good thing is that this whole situation has changed me and caused me to grow so much and I am much stronger for it. I would appreciate any and all of your honest thoughts. Thanks!
“… but I need to know if I am clinging to a false hope with this one. He can’t seem to let me go, but he can’t give me what I want either, which is a deep emotional and spiritual connection…”
Yes you are clinging to a false reality sweetheart.
Why?… You had let the sex happen way too early before knowing ‘the True’ him.
You didn’t know him then, in the way you understand his super critical Virgo neurosis now.
For many years, I was ‘that guy’ who would bed women soon and early just to prove in myself that I could conquer any hot blooded in my path (a woman’s sexual power).
Today, as a completley transformed man, I see just how selfish those animal desires actually were. During my 12 years of self-destruction I was ‘not Conscious’ to the trail of shattered hearts and souls I had left behind me. I did not see nor understand consequence with women.
The impact I had left IN women is equal to the intense energy which resides IN me.
From what I feel in your experiences, he is a guy who has not understood his desires or his his dangerous AFFECT on a woman after sex. His desire to screw you was all that mattered ‘regardless’ of the communication you keep hearing that presented something deeper and meaningful.
Spiritual, Soul-Bonding sex transcends egotistical ideas of love. If his mind and soul is stuck in “the game” of our shallow, cold, deceptive culture… he cannot grow.
Transformation through sex and intimacy is infinitely greater then our egotistical, self-serving and superficial needs above-ground in our earthly, fearful illusions.
Soul-Truths are discovered within us alone, in solitude… and when two people share eachother. If he is not a walking example of his words, then you are dealing with a hypocrite. Yet that hypocrisy is unfortunately the standard in ‘our culture’.
He is just your friend. Nothing more. Whatever he says that frames your thinking or feeling as something more, is just a cold deception to ‘Control you’ for more no sex.
A man who Truly loves has Beliefs, Higher Morals, Principles and Social Ethics carved in his Soul. For he knows that if he betrayed his honorable character… he will betray the one who he wants to love.
So he stops himself (with tremendous willpower) to act on anything “Impure”.
You won’t grow with him if he does not know himself beneath ego attachment, or his undisciplined intentions. It is very common to see in our society a male (any male) seduced by the power of his Underworld. That force has total power over his psyche. And his innate desire nature.
Your path down this painful road may well be what your Soul intended to learn and understand in order to seek more.
It is all a blessing, whatever way you want to slice it.:)
Pluto,
phew.. holy crap .fuck. thats the truth.
something to be said for setting boundaries.
Can i ask you something? what was the turning point for you when you decided 12 years of that destruction was enough? what was it that made you decide to stop and look at growing and releasing ego desires and turn toward something else more spiritual? ( i realise your last post was responding mainly to the post above but i have been stirred by this) .
Pluto –
Thank you for your response. This was exactly the kind of feedback I was hoping to get…and it was beautiful. I agree…it is absolutely a blessing regardless of how painful it has been. There are times when I am overwhelmed with a sense of gratitude for the lessons he has (unwittingly) taught me. And yes…because of the experience, I am now aware that something more exists out there that I was not aware of before. I feel like this is only the tip of the iceberg. Cool. 🙂
“The impact I had left IN women is equal to the intense energy which resides IN me.”
This rang very true for me. I feel this very strongly in him and am sensitive to its effect on me, even at a distance. This used to feel like a pulling, twisting, soul-searing pain…and like the sun went down and would never come up again. But I’ve learned to be my own source of warmth, so it doesn’t influence me the way it used to. This realization has been a big part of my personal growth.
“You won’t grow with him if he does not know himself beneath ego attachment, or his undisciplined intentions.”
I have seen glimmers of self-awareness from him from time to time, but it’s not quite there yet. As for “undisciplined intentions”, that’s a good way to put it. He has such intense cravings that he seemingly cannot control. I know that he experiences a great deal of guilt after sex because he is not being true to himself and has a concern for hurting me because he feels it when I hurt, too. He says he also has this guilt from being raised a Catholic. A Scorpio with Catholic guilt about sex? Must be torture for him! My feeling is that he has some pretty good-sized issues with true intimacy, substituting sex (read: screwing) for it, then falling short every time because the connection he seeks is not there. Seeking perfection in a partner must be hell…since it doesn’t exist; a constant disappointment. I would think that that hyper-critical nature would hinder the potential for true intimacy and love, because there will never be true acceptance of the partner as they are constantly being held at arms length and judged.
So now I deal with the question of how (or whether) to be a friend to someone who, at some level that he is not even aware of, wants to use me for sex. Obviously there is more to him than just that or this wouldn’t be a issue, but I know that I am forgiving to a fault and tend to give people the benefit of the doubt who may not deserve it. It is also difficult for me to cut people from my life who I have cared for, because I see their inherent beauty as a person and respect the path that they are on in life. It is difficult for me to fault someone for what they have chosen to learn for themselves. I’m going to have to take an even closer look at my boundaries, make a decision, and stick to it. This might mean cutting him out of my life entirely…not an option that I like very much.
“A man who Truly loves has Beliefs, Higher Morals, Principles and Social Ethics carved in his Soul. For he knows that if he betrayed his honorable character… he will betray the one who he wants to love.”
…I know this man. I KNOW he exists. I just haven’t met him. Yet. 🙂
Hi TripleFire,
Setting boundries…hmmmm
This is a paradox due to the fact that the more evolved we become, and feel ONENESS…those boundries can be recognized as “illusion”. Pluto (the planet)…knows this.
If you try to put up those boundries…well, you can see what can happen.
Being in a sexless marriage…does not mean that there is no sexual energy…repressing this energy has its consequences. Pluto (the planet) knows this as well.
In order to understand what is happening, you must understand the Plutonian side of this (sexual) energy and respect it, not put boundries on yourself and others.
Plutoninan energy inherantly understands through its creation/destruction, heaven and hell extremes, that boundries that are not SOULFULLY placed, are to be transformed.
Why place those boundries when you are dealing with someone who may understand these extremes? Even God knows what the Devil is doing.
So if you had a sexless marriage, it does not mean that there is no sexual activity. You may not have learnt to escalate and channel this energy to a higher expression. The mind and soul connection must be mastered first…you can refer to the rest of our posts about our thoughts in this matter.
Yes, you are right, only love is perfect, not us. Mr. Scorpio, in my opinion, has got it all wrong. It is the energy that finds us, we do not find the energy. It is God that works through us, we can only permit its expression. We “search” for it, by opening the mind.
I only mention this in order to avoid any further viscious cycles. Not understanding means placing a limitting factor on our capacity to choose.
Hell (Pluto) hath no fury than the “divine feminine” scorned…
Pluto is a very strong guardian of its secrets…
Hi Gatubela,
Thank you for the reply. I can definitely see how boundaries are an illusion, and in the case of two people who are highly evolved, emotionally intelligent and self-aware, I can definitely see the need for boundaries diminishing greatly if not disappearing entirely. On the other hand, I can see their usefulness in a situation that has the potential of becoming destructive and manipulative due to one of the parties not being very self-aware.
Would you help me understand what you mean by setting a “soulful” boundary?
“In order to understand what is happening, you must understand the Plutonian side of this (sexual) energy and respect it, not put boundries on yourself and others.”
I want to understand what is happening, but I’m not sure I know how to apply your suggestions. Will you explain some more please?
“Why place those boundries when you are dealing with someone who may understand these extremes?”
Because his actions thus far tell me that while he is certainly FAMILIAR with the extremes, he doesn’t necessarily UNDERSTAND them. I don’t feel like he has looked within himself and taken the time to understand where his strong urges come from…he just knows he needs to act on them. It seems to me, and to reiterate what I think Pluto said, if he doesn’t understand himself on a deeper level and understand the root of his actions and urges, we cannot grow together. If we cannot grow together, then I guess I don’t see the point of the relationship. Please tell me if I have misunderstood your meaning entirely 🙂
I think there must be a good reason for all of this too.
Well, the first response is very mental…create boundries, even for destructive behavior.
But if we solve our problems by separating ourselves from them and isolating them, then we turn it into something else.
Soulfully putting boundries is when you understand your choice for this behavior…even your impulsive ones. When the sun goes down at the end of the day, what are you made of? Justifying a one night stand because of a sexless marriage…
I plant it this way…although it may seem harsh, I only want to change your perspective a bit.
What if you had already decided, due to your lessons learnt in your marriage, what love was not, and what is was?
Putting in the soul time, sweat and tears…in getting to know ourselves…should be the first priority during our time here.
Relationships should only entered into, once we have this mindfullness
“So he stops himself (with tremendous willpower) to act on anything “Impure”.”
“Impure” could be a very “broad” concept, to say the least!
Striving to be “pure”…(not perfect), and to not cause harm, under ANY circumstances – even under fire…
This for me, is the “river of life” and how we must all “flow” together. Knowing ourselves and trying to flow (never causing harm), is the pathway.
Any impurity issues (the abyss) should get escalated to the P.R. department in the sky. It is out of your hands.
There must be a very good reason for all of this.
Well, the Divine Feminine in this case, is Pluto itself.
How she is approached will determine the duration of the war.
She bends only to love.
“… I know this man. I KNOW he exists. I just haven’t met him. Yet.”
Yeah…. you’ve met him. He is the invisible guy responding to the curious scurry bunnies expressing on this site. LOL
TripleFire,
The guy who you Truly seek is really the man who IS HIS OWN religion.
The guy who is not swayed by outward foibles or people fears pervasive through societal conformity and influences.
I have already touched on how I feel about the Catholic Church and all Religions, Doctrines and Cults of our World. They each preach ‘Control motivated’ values/ideologies/intentions… for people to follow the structure of ‘their’ respective unwavering dogmas… ‘by believing in a Divine Force’ —>> OUTSIDE of our molecular bodies. All of these religions speak with one common thread. And that thread is… “Believe in Our Nouns” (of energy) and God will “save you” and as a result of your faith by reading our scriptures religiously (no pun)… “you will be re-born!!”
So this inturn may answer Umm’s question above… what I have to share here may answer your curiosity.
I could not possibly grow (change) while manifesting unconscious Deeds through the valley of Death, or a world of psychological/emotional seduction in Hades.
Actually, in hindsight I had indeed evolved ‘through’ that peril, self-loathing, inner-blindness and self-destruction… it’s just that I did not ‘Know’ it then.
The “IT” I’m referring to is something much Greater. Something much Higher. Something forever MEANINGFUL.
So… I have learned that in order TO BECOME someone better, stronger, higher… the basis of any Spiritual change must have deeply established Roots. A rock solid Foundation of inner-faith.
What are these deeply established roots? They are Seeds of PERMANENT CHANGE. Notice the beautiful Paradox in those two specific words of manifestation??
Permanent Change (or Becoming) requires the total Death of our Past Belief Systems subscribed into us from the days we were babies and toddlers. Our psyches (reality) go that far back. So “changing” from the influences planted in us since birth requires a holocaust annihilation within us. Or I could describe it as the Death of a litany of former Ego-selves. After these cathartic and incredibly emotional events happen… the planted Seeds of our ‘new’ intricate beliefs/values/principles/morals are watered, fed and nurtured to grow a new mind, a new heart and an immortal soul.
But first, the annihilation of our Old-psyche must happen, it MUST… completley Die. The kind of death I’m talking about is our existentially perceived ideas of Truth, of Justice and of Freedoms reflected back to us in the trappings of “the neurotic… blind, stagnant personality”.
From there… our innate WILL, or Mind-Will cultivates a FEARLESS Emotional Intelligence ‘within’ our personal and collective Consciousness (the human condition) in order to EXPAND our understanding of our unfolding Consciousness.
A discerning fearlessness is then fortified. Change is happening because one must BECOME their developed mind, their expansive heart and soul… by VIRTUE of SEEKING an evolving and intricate Self-Belief system. A deep… soulful… self-belief system.
O yes. Self-Belief.
By virtue of a God-given emotional intelligence that also requires universal courage and social awareness… one then learns to expand their consciousness by virtue of the pain, suffering, limitation and fear EXPERIENCED through their past INTIMATE SELVES.
Self-knowledge is then on strong foundations by virtue of past Deeds to others and to ones-self through the valley of death. So Death-In-Life is then realized to originate from ones baseless ego… ones infantile… weak… ego-selves.
So Umm… change cannot ‘happen’ to us if we do not know how to SEEK. The seed must be ordained inside of us from a Higher Power.
Evolution… in terms of ‘finding’ an emotional intelligence, is not a logical ego choice we can just switch on like a light. If it were that simple and easy… the billions of people roaming this earth today would inwardly advance themselves and outwardly build a peaceful utopia. But as we well know, this world is riddled with war crimes, greed, murder, rape, hypocrisy and deception. A world of dark imperfection.
And finally, Pluto is a “Super-Societal” energy. This powerful Super-societal energy in human beings affects the masses through both Good and Evil choice, through both Dark and Light choice. This also means that Plutonic energy resides in our very own psyche… as do all the planet energies.
Pluto IS the infinite Dark.
Do we dare understand him?
Pluto –
Probably the only reason I know of the existence of that kind of man is from reading your posts in this thread! Gives me some hope though…because since you exist there must be at least TWO others on the entire planet…lol. And yes, that’s the kind of guy I’m after. What woman wouldn’t be? I have some growing to do first though.
As a side note…I think that “Believe in Our Nouns” would make a great bumper sticker. Reminds me of something Eddie Izzard would say! 😛
Haha Eddie sounds like a man after my own heart.
Hell let’s get that slogan into print!!… can’t you just see it now??… splashed across Billboards… on bumpers… on buses? LoL
Trouble is, who would care?… People are too busy slaughtering for their food (working) and having sex! LoL
Thanks for the love TripleFire. Hey you may just stumble upon him… keep battin those long lashes..)
yes.
if you like.
hey i just read this before,..
(knowing how dark it is out there).
Pluto’s moon, Charon (pronounced CARE-uhn), also gives Pluto a special place in the solar system. Charon is named after the boatman in Greek mythology who ferried the dead across the river Acheron. Unlike Earth’s moon, which has its own center of gravity, Pluto’s center of gravity is in the space midway between it and Charon.3 As a result, they do not spin individually like our earth and moon but together, locked on the same axis. Pluto and Charon rotate while eternally chasing one another, clenched in the tension of a distant cosmic pursuit—the god of the Underworld and the ferryman of the dead—yet never completing the chase. Pluto’ unique gravitational connection to its moon gives it added mythic power, resonant with deep overtones of mortality.
oh and another interesting bit of info.. pluto is made up of alot of methane ice ( amongst other stuff) , which is in fact highly reflective. so .. maybe not dark at all but very bright.
Umm baby.
Astrologically speaking, Pluto’s moon is spiritually too tiny and insignificant. The Plutonic energy witnessed right here on earth… from both our intimate-self and through universal Power, is ‘Symbolic’ of Pluto’s outermost orbit around the glory needy Sun (our Identity).
Because Pluto does orbit so slowly around our Sun in this solar system… it ‘retains’ the most intense, mysterious, hidden personal and collective powers known to man.
Pluto is so far away from us it does not see the Sun or Moon and their nearby busy children… Earth, Mercury, Venus and Mars… as anything unknown, deep or exceptional.
Pluto thinks to himself… “Let the kids play”… Daddy has to Transform the Universe!” LoL
lol. hmm. interesting..
when you need a rest we can play lego and i can show you my latest backflip
Gatubela –
Thank you for the reality check. It is good to have another person’s perspective. I have at least decided what I would like to be different in my next relationships based on the experience I had in my marriage. Maybe I was justifying a one night stand (that wasn’t a one night stand) because of my sexless marriage. I guess I never saw it as a justification, but a partial explanation. There is probably much more to it than that though. As for boundaries, I understand your meaning now I think. Quarantining the problem isn’t going to make it go away….and might even make it “worse”. What we resist persists, no? Without a doubt, getting into another relationship of any kind directly after my divorce was a bad idea. I probably attracted something/someone unstable because of my own personal instabilities and unresolved issues. Point taken.
Hi Trmiple Fire,
Well, I am used to people getting mad at me once I say something…it is one of the reasons my life is in danger…so (phew!!!) thank you for taking the time to “listen to me”. It is all nice to have a truth, but it is just as important, if not more so, to be listened to.
Triple Fire, despite all that we seem to be used to with Scorpio, I do believe that it is women that may be a bit off on their percepcion. The reason being is due to relationship physics.
Scenario based on our side:
Once we are confronted by a very defined EGO (masculine), our feminine energies activate. Again, no small statement…
Scenario based on his side:
What “EGO” is he confronted with? Usually it is an incomplete one, without Scorpionic extremes. His “feminine” can not be balanced out.
It is the fact that you only felt “soul searing pain” that makes me say this to you.
Another thing is that plutonian sexual energy, in its higher expression, is a very powerful life giving force. When in a relationship, it is your job to guide it.
Scorpio can reach higher highs and even obtain their spiritual goals…once they master this energy. So, as I said before, respect it, as if it were a third person in the relationship.
Gatubela:
I am here to learn!…so of course I would listen to you and not “shoot the messenger”. Helpful words are not always easy to hear, but straightforward people are hard to come by. Besides…what fun is it to have beliefs if they aren’t constantly being challenged? 😉
I have been thinking about your comment: “What “EGO” is he confronted with? Usually it is an incomplete one, without Scorpionic extremes. His “feminine” can not be balanced out.”
This makes me wonder…what constitutes an “incomplete” ego? Did you mean underdeveloped? I suppose I’ve never thought of my ego as incomplete…but how would I know if it was? Is it even, by definition, possible to take a step back and assess the “quality and quantity” of ones’ own ego? Isn’t that akin to a hand trying to shake itself?
That “soul-searing pain” I was referring to, I believe, had to do with an attachment to this person that I was not prepared to have due to being in the presence of something very powerful that I was not prepared to experience (the energy that must be respected that you were talking about). What Pluto said about the impact he left in women being equal to the intense energy within him absolutely made sense to me. The difference is…he is aware of it now. I’m not so sure that the guy I’m dealing with is.
Contrast the concept of a complete ego with a complete LOSS of ego. Both are valuable, and at two extremes. I cannot experience Oneness through the filter of my own ego, but I also cannot fully relate to the world around me and feel my place in it without a full knowledge of self or a “complete” ego. Hmm. What am I missing?
I just Googled “ego death” and ran into a bunch of stuff about LSD and mushrooms…lol. There must be another way 🙂
Hi Triple Fire,
“…so of course I would listen to you and not “shoot the messenger”. Helpful words are not always easy to hear, but straightforward people are hard to come by. Besides…what fun is it to have beliefs if they aren’t constantly being challenged?
Hi Triple Fire –
Well, your first sentence has set the tone for this conversation.
I don´t have beliefs per se, I have experiences.
Fun…is the last thing you will have if you are trying to understand Plutonic energies. I can see those eagle eyes on you now. LOL!
I would not want to challenge anyone´s beliefs on a normal day. BUT “challenging” them with Scorpio – Plutonic energies, could get you a very heavy dose of “under everything that you know” transformative education. Since the soul searing pain is getting to you, it could indicate that you need to work on restoring balance in yourself – or self healing.
In order to advance with these concepts, you must define your idea – feeling of love. (Perhaps based on your marriage experiences.) Can you find it with him?
Once you do that, ask yourself this question:
Will you still love him if he does not give you what you “want”.
This tells you what you are made of.
Be patient with yourself, as there are no right or wrong answers. You really must place yourself at the precipice of love with these energies.
Scorpio does this everyday, before breakfast.
Start taking out those mushrooms now…
Actually, some religions are based on these very powerful energies or rather not releasing,…as a gateway to further “very powerful and magical” experiences.
This is not happening in your case. I just wanted to share the fact that some cultures really place importance on it.
There must be a reason for that as well, I imagine.
Hi P.Puppy and Triple Fire,
The seed of “seeking” can also be planted – cultivated , in us by our parents – as they are our “higher power and creators” when we are children. This is an alternative option.
Actually, we are born with it.
It is a matter of looking at a two year old, exploring its world. Just try and stop them from “seeking”. Oh my goodness!!!
But usually, this does not happen.
I am glad that you wrote that previous comment – “the seed of seeking” is what I protect most fiercely – in my children.
Where I am, divorce was only legalized in 2007 – so you can imagine how hard this was.
Oh yes, no doubt our parents have us seeking. The question remains… about What?… and for WHO?… and Why?
Parents do the best they can with what they have and understand.
My specific Soul-Path was meant to destroy whatever I had been ‘shown to seek’ as a child… and seek an affinity located somewhere else. In Me.
The Source communicates with me. I manifest the message and seek for more.
That’s my path. I do not want to imply this should be every persons spiritual journey. I never have.
And yes, there certainly are cultures who commune with the Divine and make this world a better place. We are all connected, but our mission and our personal fate (in this life) are different.
“The Source communicates with me. I manifest the message and seek for more.”
Sounds a lot like what I do too (after going through various fluffy bunny responses – (such as “Was my hair alright?”))
My heart is filled with love due to the wonder and beauty of it all.
Hi again Triple Fire,
“Contrast the concept of a complete ego with a complete LOSS of ego. …What am I missing?”
You are missing Love. It becomes more than just a concept. It becomes the navegator to a state of being.
Why place together “knowing your place in the world” (rampant polarity with the extremes that you talk about) with “knowing your place” in a romantic (or divine) relationship (trends toward divine feminine/masculine and zero-ego).
Does anyone place (or struggle to place) your soul in their hearts in the work place? When was the last time some colleague confronted you with “who you REALLY are”?
In some relationships, all you really do need, is love and expressing it while flowing as virtuously as possible.
To go further down the bunny hole, the EGO that should confront someone you truly love, as to never cause harm to them – even under “fire”, is actually found in that very same Paradox that you mention.
Sacrifice your ego (and all that you know)and put God / the Source in your heart. The mind can not rationalize this, so don´t try to.
Zero Ego is Divine Ego. And this allows you to love, without wanting anything.
I would like to share the experience of self awareness, there is a sense of meaningfulness in doing so. I try to examine if my motivation is clear, and find I want share a personal experience ( Personal, everyone’s own experience might be different in light of their own uniqueness) I haven’t seen voiced but could be very real, the experience of pain, but under no circumstance I want to undermine the healthy practice of speaking truth however directly/ harsh compassion that’s the atmosphere of this blog, I hope what I say here is a contribution to that practice.
To describe uniqueness as I see it… society and tradition in general love to rank things, and when politically correctness calls for it, they say oh, we are all unique. Meaning in the ranking minds of group, uniqueness is to give everybody a break and therefore we are all the same. no, we are not all the same, we are unique, I see it as the mountains are unique and oceans are unique, there are mountains that are tall and magnificent, the acceptance of its uniqueness is not to say oh, but there are mountains that are wide and there are the one’s that have the so many trees. no, its uniqueness is when one see the sight, one lost in the wonder of it’s beauty and magnificence, and know in one’s heart he/she is not going to see it somewhere else, and that’s it, the uniqueness stops here, competition stops here, competition do not enter the realities of mountains and oceans , they just are, they are who they are, so to me, uniqueness is to be that mountain. So to find that uniqueness is to find that site, that trees, that brooks and stones that belongs to me, and then, just be.
In the realms of understandings and logic, everything is crystal clear, words can be as clear as we type it, but when emotions enters the realm of reality, which they inevitably will since we are all human, everything changes, every understanding and clarity we ever have are challenged becasue we just couldn’t help but FEEL, desire, hurt, joy…PAIN. but the logic mind tells me, no, you shouldn’t feel this way, divine ego is no ego, then you feel hurt means you somehow have to get rid of it to BE divine. we all want to be divine, at least it is very true for me, this in its self, a ego, but a healthy aspect of ego, we want to better ourselves. so we create ego upon having no ego, and no one really voice it, it’s a silent killer of PAIN. but pain cannot be killed, it’s hidden and never really opened, therefore truth is not found the healthy way, by accepting/examining our feelings, truth is generally voiced by talking about feelings, but self-denied the openness to feel/share them.
I felt hurt, not to take anything out of its context and circumstances which is a large part my own doing, but to find the uniqueness of self, examine our pain is necessary and may be the only way. I found when pain is hidden and unacknowledged, it’s incredibly hard to get out of them, meaning a person need to have a degree of detachment to look at his/her own pain, and I also found out detachment can be achieved by way of offering his/her vulnerability to the open. If pain/vulnerability can be imagined as a terrible secret a person has to carry all by her/himself (becasue things are said/done driven by that hurt, but she/he couldn’t tell anyone, so the secret made a huge gap in the reality of emotions/truth and the reality of reason she/he give to the world, they do not line up), then it probably not hard to imagine the relief of letting go that terrible secret, then you can imagine the tears in saying…I did this because such and such is so hard because… you see the way truth come out when we give up lies of self-protection. When we give up carrying the secret of pain, we can detach ourselves from it, then we can look at it under the unwavering gaze of self-awareness.
Pain comes from all directions, by putting it under magnify glass, we can clearly trace each origin, pain do not born out of thin air, there is always an origin. then each origin can be noted and categorized, and the circumstance of the sources can be analyzed, therefore identify what caused pain, AND what DID NOT. This is very important, because the ones that have the equal potential to cause pain but DIDN’T, I found out, is the areas/things that I’m CONFIDENT in, this tells me pain DO NOT come from confidence, it comes from INSECURITIES. So to live a life where pain diminishes with truth is to live a life of FACING your insecurities. Self-confidence kills pain. so I’m going to re-word the concept of ego, I would like to say, the divine ego is in essence the rawest closeness to our self-worth, and self-worth is achieved through our own confidence of knowing what we have inside of ourselves. This is probably getting ahead of myself, because the confidence can only be recognized by knowing the insecurities.
My awareness tells me, insecurities is the wanting of something outside of ourselves and the fear of not be able to get it. because with insecurities there is always a measurement to which we measure a success or failure, most likely, the fear of failure. This is the indication of the “outside” nature of our wanting, because we do not “want” what we already have, and there is no measurement to compare a success or failure, we are what we have, you never fail to be you, because you are you. the easiest test to this is, imaging you are stranded on a island indefinitely, then everything you ever feel unsatisfied about yourself which you always feel is about “you”, is not really about you at all, you want to be tall? then in the vacancy of an island that only has you on it, so you still want to be tall? do you still feel bad you have a bad hair day? do you worry that the bird has a better nest than you do? no, nothing matters, because you don’t have to impress yourself, you have no urge to perform, therefore you never fail, you eliminated you insecurities. So you notice the true and rawest self, is the things in you that you never felt is important to you, it’s things you have forgotten about your self. I have in my life experience, noticed people will tell you the one thing that’s most important to them, actually is the one thing that they don’t have, or having struggled over/spending most of their life living without, and I ask people what that thing is, just to get a better idea of who they really are. I never tide the picture together, but with the new awareness, everything is slowly falling together. So the way to find our confidence, is to look into ourselves and find the things we have that are NOT important to us, yes, scrape the idea of importance from your known self, and find out who you are, you are what you’ve always taken granted for. Keep this knowledge of your rawest self-worth in mind always, because insecurities will always be there, it’s part of life, no man is an island.
The one thing that is infinitely real, when we are stranded on an island indefinitely, where we experience no pain from insecurities, the one real thing is we want to die, we don’t want to live indefinitely alone and with on hope of finding contact. This is a truth we must accept in ourselves, that we need connection to survive, like we accept the fact we need food and air to survive, human contact, the richness of interactions and exchange, is the food for the soul so it can grow. I became aware the way of love is to offer our uniqueness and embrace that of the other’s uniqueness, therefore we expend and become more, I now realize this is the way our soul grows, the way only when mountains and oceans exists together we have a world to roam in. WE MUST RELATE to live. Then the value of knowing our self-worth/the truth of our insecurities, is to KNOW, that we are all the same, we suffer the same sufferings and have the same insecurities, so when some one hit you on the head and you feel pain, you want to hit him back, and you raise your eyes, you see with your souls eyes that this person in front of you, has a web of scares and bleeding wounds on his soul, you see his pain, you see his insecurities, you see people when they try to escape their pain and plunge in drug drink sex and never will, you see, everyone even if they don’t know their pain, they feel it, they feel their own destruction every drop along the way. So your urge to hit that head back diminishes, he is punished by his life that he lived to that point, more than you can ever handle and imagine, being a peaceful and simple person most of your life. You see through your souls eyes, that everyone that tried to hurt you, hurt you, is in the process of hurting you, is in essence, trying to hug you, get close to that human interaction we all need, the lower resistance in your aura, attract those in pain, the lost souls in pain, the more we don’t know how to love, the more we are in pain. In understanding and acceptance of pain, you find compassion and love and confidence. and everything will continue to happen the way it’s been happening with your own awareness raise or fall, this world of everything having a rightful chance to exist. and the only true reward of all these knowing and awareness is to find PEACE in everything that happens to you and you happen to everyone else.
We are all the same.
I took my son to IMAX today to see the movie Mars Needs Moms, in moments of sharing the character’s pain of loneliness, of loss, I cried as hard as I ever did, and during the tears awareness decent upon me again, it comes from all directions and anytime now. The awareness completes what I have already share last time, about finding self-worth and knowing insecurities. The vague sense of inevitably of facing insecurities, because we must relate to live, therefore we must interact with others to fill our needs, leading to needing something outside of self for the healthy growth of our being. and that understand insecurities gives you the understanding to feel compassion for people who gave you pain. The new awareness makes this picture more complete.
Majority of people in this world is unaware of their self-worth, this is why you see in news when we ask the person of a heroics deed, they feel bewildered that what they did is out of ordinary, they feel “anyone would do that”, but I know now with certainty, these heroes are as insecure as anyone you encounter on the street about themselves. We take grand of our capabilities because we just are. we do not spend time and energy on something we easily could achieve. Yet this center of forgotten resource is the center of your being that nothing and no one could shake or take away, it’s your center of unwavering confidence, because you have access of it at any given time, this is not to say we don’t tend to the self-worth, it grows even when neglected just because we grow as a person, imagine its POWER and POTENTIAL if we focus on it, and cultivate it, and turn around use that capabilities to relate to others, we deviate from our strength because we focus our attention and energy on insecurities, we mistake the insecurities as our identity, therefore we question our self-worth when we “fail”, we have a huge chance of failure at anything we reach out to simply because the deciding power of whether we get what we want largely depends on other’s reality, it has NOTHING to do with our “self”. So the clear differentiation of our self-worth and our “wants” are critical, because at any given moments of life experience, this warm center of self-worth is the anchor of your being, you have much bigger capacity to take on life’s pain and experience because of this confidence.
When we say peace, the image of serenity and stillness comes to mind, yet in the new awareness I achieve today, peace has new meaning now. It showed me that to live a life of diminishing pain is not the essence of being alive. the essence of being alive is to LIVE, experience EVERYTHING, joy and pain. get rid of the pain of relating is NEVER the goal of LIVING, The peace come into play when you have the unwavering sense of self-confidence of your self-worth, therefore any pain from relating no longer THREATENS your self identity, and pain without the motivation of “threat” to our being will lead to very different action of how we react to that pain, you will not feel the need to annihilate a threat to your “being”, you will feel the need to communicate to RELATE, or simply move on as a choice. this is PAIN in PEACE. In peace you will have a clarity of everything you feel is the richness of being alive, the richness of engage in living, richness of reaching out to others, it’s life, it’s not you. and the same goes to our need to achieve, the healthy aspect of our ego, it no longer threatens us because it do not shake our unwavering center of confidence, it’s icing on the cake. The difference in motivation could lead to very different choice of action in life. Awareness comes in peace for me, I’m saying this not to undermine the profoundness of transformation by painful death, not at all, remember the uniqueness of our being indicates we will walk different path to achieve rebirth, or awareness… what I share is awareness as reality to me, very personal.
To me, I have always felt god lives in everyone of us, I feel god in his infinite love would never put obstacle for us just to reach him, so language, education, tribute, knowledge of man would never be the path to find him, hence the fruitless attempt of religion to claim otherwise, everyone would be able to have an access to the universal god at any given moment(whether we want to find him or aware of him or know how to find him is a different subject), the only thing fits the bill is ourselves. god lives in ourselves, and to watch a cartoon with my son today, is to understand in a moment of awareness that god’s language is emotion, we must feel EVERYTHING, feel pain, feel joy to relate to each other, because we may not understand eachother’s million differences, but we relate in an instance to the experience of PAIN, of JOY, of emotions, it pulls everyone of this existence together in a moment of tears running down my cheeks, seeing the loneliness of me, of you, of everyone I encountered in my life, and everyone else I haven’t, of everyone dead or unborn, in that moment, we are all together in Gorge’s tears of being infinitely alone…and simply…wanting to hug each other.
hi jojo,
well you are doing some delving.looking at the concepts of insecurities in yourself. i noticed you said in the first post that we are not all the same- we are unique, and in the second post you said we are all the same. what does that mean . im glad you are seeing the importance of moving through pain.if we understand where our emotions spring from it makes life easier i think and things keep moving. well they do regardless and thats the irony of it all. i hope you get some hugs soon x
Umm,
Thank you for your kind words, this is a personal journey the act of writing it out and sharing is healing to me, what I’ve shared here, is my past as a collective whole, the first and for most harm dealt to others, it applies to myself before it reaches others, I’m the monster before I’m the victim, this is the pain I must face, but I’m learning to trust compassion others would feel for me too. As for your question of uniqueness and sameness, to put it quiet simply, think of it this way, we have different ways/taste/preference/preparation of eating (uniqueness), but we all feel hungry and need food (same).
ok i understand.thankyou for explaining that.
its what i thought you meant but i wasnt 100% sure.
yes it is healing to share.
it s a strange and everchanging world we live on.
i find that a comfort sometimes..to know that things never stay the same.
notice the moon the other night? it was huge.”they” call it a perigee moon. it was full in virgo. hmm. its been an emotional build up for alot of people.
umm
Hi Umm and JoJo,
Yes, I heard about the moon – it is called (…wait for it – the name is really original in Spanish…)
Super Luna (Super moon) hahahha!!!
Pluto may make one seem like they are the monster – but as I have said before, the divine secrets and treasure that it holds are most jealously guarded through its darkness and distance from the sun. It won´t let you pass so easily, due to the fact that the people who do pass, will be incredibly powerful. People who get lost in its dark, magnetic allure, cause no REAL damage. It was already broke in the first place.
You must past through its deadly gates and master its lessons. Illusions through negative expression are most rampant as you get closer.
To depolarize this incredible energy, I have noticed that Love is the most effective way. But the problem, is that what we think love is, really isn´t.
So, if you are thinking that you are the monster, well, you would be wrong. You have just chosen to express the LOWER EXPRESSION of WHO you REALLY are! Perhaps if we knew how to read astrology charts like P.Puppy, there could be a more stronger correlation as for the most part, no one really knows, in real time, where they are in the expression of themselves.
Soulful mindfulness, even while we do our daily slaughter activities (hahaha!!!) puts a little “divine” in our step – and raises those frequencies a bit.
Kind of like the Japanese tea ceremony.
Surrendering to ourselves, assures the rest of the world, that we won´t destroy it.
Imagine if the rules were different? Oh yeah, just turn on the local news!!!
As I have said before, the energy finds you, you do not find the energy.
The energy expresses itself through you, you do not express the energy.
To share in this wonderful expression of WHO we REALLY are, is beautiful.
Continue my journey of sharing…to understand the dynamics of relationships, first we must accept what’s in ourselves, the good and the bad, acceptance bring about clarity, clarity of the universal language of insecurities and our own behavior surrounding that insecurity. when I say relationship, it’s the living exchange between tow people who is emotionally involved, understanding sans emotion do not really apply becasue all of our understanding are challenged when emotions enter reality. The first thing we need to be aware is the behavior of “annihilation” of what we emotionally deemed a “threat” to our “worth” due to our mistaken self-identity of our insecurities. I have noticed in myself the act of cutting people off either entirely, or emotionally, or attempt to do so. The message I was sending is “I don’t want you”, this lead my awareness to the nature of annihilation: by diminishing other’s worth, to confirm our own. If I truly do not want something, I do not engage in interactions with it, for example if I don’t want a bee, I would be closing the door and stay away from start, I would not be sitting in the hive and tell this to its face. so to manifest my own behavior of this passive annihilation to that of everyone, you see in woman we do this by flaunting our looks, helplessness, inner world to men who are attracted to it, and all the while have no good intention to follow through our behavior to everyone we entice, we want men to want us while we do not really want them, we want to diminish them while confirm us, insecurities. the same insecurities applies to men in the form of “yes I want you, but not only you”, we diminish eachother’s worth to feed our own insecurities. A more aggressive kind of annihilation is to drill an idea until it take root. I have said to my husband “I know what you said is the truth, but you already told me, I already know, so why then do you continue to tell me over and over again, except to hurt me with it?”, I said this to him, but I’m doing the same thing to him, I just couldn’t see it without this awareness. If I was really wanting to speak only the truth, then I say it once, it’s enough, truth only need to be acknowledged, changes are our own responsibility for our well being, intervention is justified when malicious intention to harm others is apparent. so watch in ourselves this behavior of annihilation, know it for it truly is and watch for what others do to you, know it for what it truly is. Up until a week or so ago, I have no idea of everything I share here, I live the life of unaware my own worth and insecurities, everything I share here, I haven’t had the chance to live it out, I don’t know if awareness is going to change behavior, all is unknown.
The dynamics of relationships, I don’t want to turn away from what we’ve been talking about on this blog all along: surrender, submission. do not turn away from your inner vision, even it means to speak up to things or person you greatly admire. In my new awareness, I recognized the surrender or submission of our known, in essence is the surrender or submission to truth. truth can be in the form of a man, a situation, a inner voice, anything that induce change in us to the greater self. So when that truth present its self in the form of man, always remember he is us, we are all the same, he has no intention to harm, but he could, you have no intention to harm, but you could, so looking at him is fruitless, looking at ourselves will give you the light of being human. Remember our insecurities at all times, remember we “want”, we see what we “want” as important to us, we annihilate, we neglect what we have, we are unaware of our “worth”. Keep this in light and watch your interactions with him, you will notice if sincerity, good intention, and willingness is offered, but ignored, and communication happens on the level of his “want” and not what’s present…then he is operating on his humanness of insecurities, because communication in the unwavering confidence of self-worth happens in what we offer, openness, and a focus on what we “have”. Watch this behavior in yourself as well, you will see the same thing, if sincerity, good intention, and willingness is offered and you ignore it and focusing instead on your “want” or “hurt”, know then you are operating on your insecurities too. real communication happens this way, but always accept this insecurity in anyone, we are all the same, we relate. Relate with feelings, help each other cross the hurt of been insecure and reach meaningful interaction.
To me god’s language is emotions, and that we need to relate to feed our soul. See it this way, we are terrible parents, there is no need to deny it, everyone of us is a bad parent in some way, there is just no helping it, we are not done with our own growing until the day we die, yet everyone of us are equip to become a complete being in light of our terrible parenting. we have god live within us, he teaches us through the language of emotions, even when the parents and society fail, we learn the good by experiencing joy when we are loved, we learn the bad by experiencing pain when we are harmed, and we instinctively know this is how they feels if we love others/if we harm others. god teaches us by making us FEEL everything that is happening to us, so, turning away from our emotions, and eliminating some while confirm others, is selective deafness to god’s voices. we have to accept everything in us that makes us feel…If we feel envy, then if we let the sameness of humanity enter our consciousness, we will know by flaunting what we have to those who “don’t have”, this is how they will feel, therefore we restrain and share… so on so fourth. This is how our soul learns to grow, this is why we need to relate, we don’t feel these interactions when we are stranded infinitely alone on a island hunting clams and counting clouds.
But sometimes the image of that life is very tempting, especially when full moons are making people go bananas with emotions…
OMG, I’m so angry today, I can’t help it and I can’t hold it, I must let the dimwits out there have it. Know this, I say what I say here in anger which I held in since I become aware, and what I say here is for your own good, no matter what I call you. so don’t take it personal. Proceed at your own risk.
Ok, for the dimwits who feel SURRENDER is a dimwit word that apear in the same importance of “oh we must surrender!!!” complete with the eye lash battering, know this, you have not the faintest idea of what SURRENDER is, becasue you are not in you dimwit self aware there is a war, hence, the surrender. If you are on the battle filed, half of the dimwits would wave a white flag while walking on the scene, the other half will shoot him on the back when you “surrendered”, and the smell of what truly going on gets into you dimwit head. You haven’t the faintest idea there is a war becasue you haven’t the faintest idea what the war is fought for, it’s not for the gold or for the glory, it’s for your VALUE, for every house in your castle there a living breathing being lives behind it, your interaction with them, your tradition with those you love, you national anthem, you god damn language, how the hell you raise your son, how in the world you dealt with your family, EVERYTHING! This is the integrity of war, there is a god damn good reason if one is ever fought, and the there better be a god damn BETTER reason to surrender to it.
If you read what I write and get into your dimwit head that EMOTIONS overwrites ALL reasoning when they get into you, you should start to see the real picture of what a Scorpio truly is, these are men who in his intrinsic self will DESTROY everything on his way for his devotion for you, reason, right or wrong, everything that he ever held important, he would destroy them all for you. and they DEMAND you match with him the same, for anything less is UNWORTHY of his devotion. do you then see the ANNIHILATION of boundaries? is god damn WILLINGNESS of give up everything you ever know!! do you have in your dimwit heart to plunge a dagger into a warm beating heart to avenge him? he would you…THIS IS what god damn intensity is all about, is not about how hard you batter your eyelashes, or how long you stay behind the bedroom doors. IT’S YOU!! YOUR IDENTITY!!! remember that warm center of unwavering confidence of self-worth is, you’ve got be willing to give up that too, remember how you deal with your son, your friend, you job, your family, yup, give it up dimwit babies. EVERY GOD DAMN THING. I’m not saying this is what will happen, but you bet your dimwit heart, you must be 200% behind your dimwit surrender and your words because, hell, you are UNWORTHY if you are not, and these men DO NOT kid you, they will discard you on your lies, becasue they will not lie on that devotion. and you know what? they’ve got the GOD DAMN gift of bottomless emotions to fuel their devotions, what the hell do you have dimwit babies, bunnies, whatever the hell you are called? you’ve got you god damn clear head and your bear boned COURAGE to motivate you, it’s like he’s in a trance and you are wide awake in the plunge. Yeah, no matter how civilized or evolved a Scorpio is, THIS IS WHAT THEY ALL WANT, no EXCEPTIONS, this is who they ARE!!! you want uniqueness, this is uniqueness to its profound and intense extreme.
Do you know what the stinger is for, you thought the poison of the un-evolved Scorpio, nooooo, dimwit babies, they are the INTOXICATION of EVERY Scorpio man, becasue to get that self-annihilation, you must lost you HEAD, you must be intoxicated to be at the level of emotional intensity to match them, once they engage in you, you are under the influence, with no exceptions, that’s why the honorable Scorpios will not do so until you are aware what you are doing, the INTEGRITY of war, they want you to know what you are in for. DO YOU know what you are in for? dimwits? Do you see the destruction the un-evolved ones can have on your emotional and overall well being? do you see why when they are not aware what they are doing, who they are, they will try to get you into their territory to intoxicate you? DO YOU KNOW?
AM I telling you the negative things of these men? no, dimwits, I’m trying to tell you the TRUTH, there are always incredible rewards behind incredible risks, but, do you want this life? do you want to be LOVED? do you want it? there got be a god damn good reason if war is ever fought, and the there better be a god damn BETTER reason to surrender to it. because you are honestly better off taking care of your own than the whole lot of dimwit Scorpios out there, SERIOUSLY. And you may find a good one, but, ARE YOU WORTHY of him? ARE you? what are you made of?
So, if you want this life, you better get busy built your castles and your CIVILIZATIONS, becasue WAR are not fought when there are no value involved, what you got is a damn wilderness with natives waving white flags as a charity cases, and the god damn army will not stay, they will plunge a flag in your futile and open soil saying “colony”, and move on. SO, dear dimwit babies, do we understand each other?
….OK… that’s some serious venting…I’m angry, don’t blame me, blame the moon.
Oh, more of my anger, do you know why I’m angry dimwit babies? do you know why you are not? the clear indication that you have no idea what you are “surrendering”, or you have nothing to really give up. What at stake here babies, is that you are going to be the annihilator of everything you EVER LOVED, WILLINGLY, I don’t give a damn what they tell you what character they have, how honorable in his care for you, the surrender is about you, the destruction is you, he is the reincarnation of death, death is his norm, so the destruction is about you, no matter what you believe of him, YOU “have to” in your soul’s reality, “willing” to kill everything and everyone in your reality, becasue that is what god damn surrender is, you GIVE UP your power and control over those you care. Damn it, it dosen’t worth a damn who he is, your surrender has to be god damn real for it to worth a damn. agrrr… I’m furious!!! The damn plutonians with their magnificence decent upon your door, only becasue YOU HAVE a prosperous city, you have beauty and strong foundations, then in the name of love, all has to be destroyed.
dimwit babies, don’t you see why the hell I love you so much even as I call you such, I share with you the ways to built, so if you want them, they might come, and if they don’t come, you may find experience in become your confident self on your own, agr… I don’t know what I’m saying!! but I’m angry!!!
and you know the pain of unawareness engaging with these men, you invite them in your home as a partner to share, yet in their reality they are here to erase and rebuilt your world, do you see why there is so much pain in everything goes on when unaware?
Wake up!!!! babies!!! know what you are in for!!!!
haha… calm yourself JoJo.
You’re sounding like a furious muddled bunny with loud chainsaw in hand. lol
Un-muddle… simplify, those ambivalent storms. Feel your thoughts. It is futile to ‘think’ your feelings.
Then again… Libra Air nature wasn’t designed to ‘feel thoughts’… or instincts… you’ll be fine.
A Disciplined mind is a Healthy mind. Allow Mercury in the Lord of Sex, Death and Transformation to work ‘for you.’ It’s wise to not “mentally fight” Plutonic energy… he’ll just make you shake in your bunny boots.
Hi JoJo,
The realization at the end is that you really did not have anything of value anyways – before you felt the power of his love.
However, for the bunny used to dealing with the forces of life and death as her norm, a whole new scenario opens up.
Scorpio will not want you to destroy something you truly love by the way – only what you don´t.
Some bunnies are in contact with the universe.
She can call Scorpio, before they show up at her doorstep.
It is time to move those mountains.
Yeah, it’s some quite serious chainsaw action, I actually laughed pretty hard at myself after all the steam went out. I’m sorry for hurt your feelings by calling names and such, but glad I openly expressed/shared my feelings, there are things to be learned by looking at our emotions, and there are things to be learned in the dynamic of a self-confident interaction of human relating. Anger is what it is, I’m fully aware anger what I was expressing and hope I communicated sufficiently so, may I ask everyone be fully aware of what I was expressing, instead of what I was saying in relation to you. I do love you all, otherwise I wouldn’t be here sharing at all, the communication of feelings. accept in ourselves our honest feeling, communicate to relate, communicate to make each other understand. May we see it this way? have anyone ever witness a death where there is no struggle in reality? unless you are the plutonian of transformation, majority of people don’t have the capacity to face death without struggle, so struggle in me is very real, to pretend otherwise is to lie to myself, or an ego display. and by accepting the realty of others, we then begin to become aware that we have expanded our capacity of understanding, we then started to give allowance to what others feel in their reality and not feeling threatened by it, we then begin to see the healthy practice of expression—>I’m able to get over the anger after anger was expressed.
And by observing my own anger, I become aware of new things, remember this practice of expression-observation-reflection to the path of awareness: self –> humanity –> others. this practice begins with ourselves, like on the flight in case of emergencies we put on our own mask first before helping others, this simple yet powerful steps has in a very short period of time changed the psyche of my communication. The new awareness from observing my anger comes in the form of experiencing the paradox of feeling “love” and “anger”, seeing others as “who we want to love” and “the enemy”, the source of this feeling is “so much is at stake” from our own reality. Then reflect this paradox holds true for everyone who feels “so much is at stake” in a relationship dynamic: the scorpion reality of the paradox : love/hate, hot/cold, hope/distrust. so much is at stake in the emotional reality of emotional engagements. With this reflection we can become aware that to relate to that “PARADOX” is meaningless, becasue we then would be sucked in our insecurities with the negatives and lose our objectivity with the positives. This is not to say we are emotionally unresponsive to the emotions of the Scorpio, we are, we relate to them at the source “so much is at stake”, and instinctively know that we communicate “love is in abundance” if we are fully behind our commitment, and if we are not yet able to be fully behind our commitment, we communicate with our truth: the very real struggle of facing death. either way, we eliminate promotion of “insecurities” in ourselves as well as in others by communicating from our center of unwavering confidence of self-worth.
Sorry all, and major V peace V
Actually, if we take what I said in the context of anger and tone it down from the emotional over charge, there are actually awareness in that anger that could be valuable to the realty of surrender/death to the majority of us. It’s very real that the surrender IS without reservation, without expectation, becasue by understanding the uniqueness of everyone, we understand expectation means very different things in each and everyone of us, the holding on of “a good and honorable man wouldn’t change what you really love” is a expectation that could mean very different things in the annihilation of boundaries, because embracing a different uniqueness could very well mean you need to destroy what you truly love in compassion/love to his rawest reality, hence you would change what you truly love willingly, we would be truly and 100% open to embrace with every new reality. so death is truly death, there is no last breath to be holding on when you plunge into it. it doesn’t mean what’s been rebuilt later have no overlaps with what you have now, but it’s a different subject from death itself. When I say wake up, I truly mean it.
“…because embracing a different uniqueness could very well mean you need to destroy what you truly love in compassion/love to his rawest reality, hence you would change what you truly love willingly…”
Divine feminine knows what will make the person she loves complete through her very surrender. Under this context, all ego expressions of love seem very shallow.
So knowing a person´s rawest reality and who they REALLY are or CAN BE – is more important than the relationship itself. With the person´s true being being slapped in your face, paradoxes and time collapse into zero ego into that one moment of truth. If you are not helping the person be in his reality, then you are a hypocrite.
One should never allow themselves to be disinterested standbyers to this very fact.
Oh how I understand this one.
Gatubela
Hmmmm, I’m going to say this very carefully… becasue I sensed emotional withdrawn from you as a indicator of pain, I have no intention to harm you, but feeling pain is good, I hope what I share here is the idea of facing our pain, if that is too hard to do, then relate by watching my pain and other emotions, please know emotions overwrite reasons when we feel them , I may hurt you by what I say simply because I was under too much of my own feelings to care, but I have no intention to do so, sorry.
god is telling us the truth trough our honest emotions. So I am on the path of open to them, feel them, understand them, any logic that doesn’t relate to understanding our own emotions has increasing little meaning to me because the path of emotions is too truthful for me to want to deviate from it. Hope this helps us to understand each other.
*hugs*
Hi JoJo,
My emotional withdrawal is spiritual as it has everything to do with who I really am and the energy I must hold. I usually know the future of my relationships way before I begin them.
The phoenix rises to be free. It rises due to the fact that it is a mixture of fire and air. The earth and water can not hold it prisoner any longer.
Don´t ever be sorry (at least not to me) – be truthful.
I already understood you – most compassionately and lovingly – more than you know.
yes! be truthful to ourselves, to our honest feelings, don’t fight ourselves, understand her, love her. In ertrospect of my anger, you then notice the “held in”, and the “display” point. you then notice the origin of anger was the death it’s self, but the expressing of anger is INSECURITY. you then notice the language of anger is “diminishing the worth of others to confirm my own”, yes, I was very insecure in the fact everyone makes “death” seem like an easy event, event to look-forward to instead of struggle with, but what I truly feel inside is struggle, therefore the sense of failure. read and read everything and every communication past, look at them in the light of emotional exchange, a whole new set of reality will come to your awareness.
Now, my heart is telling me to find silence to FEEL, and I will do so.
Hugs!!!
“but the expressing of anger is INSECURITY”
Yes. The manifestation of anger is fear. And that fear stems of not knowing how to control nor wanting to understand ones emotions in the moment.
So whenever we see angry, hateful, vile, aggressive behavior (especially in full grown men)… we are witnessing, FEAR.
Anger means fear. Hate means fear. Lies and Deceit mean fear. They are all the antithesis of LOVE.
So a deep Integrity means love. Dignity means love. A genuine Purpose means love.
The manifestation of love or fear exist in each Choice and Deed. They often happen simultaneously within.
So the bottom line is… we the people who exist in this ‘fearful shallow culture’ lose ourselves in the ‘Projections’ of our materialistic environments.
Simply, people all around us – Fear to Love.
Anger is related also to not getting what you desire or want.
This of course, invokes the fear response that you talk about.
For Scorpio, I have discovered that insecurities (fears) could lie in the fact that his/her partner, does not participate in his or her reality – or better said – his or her genuine purpose.
As it is the ultimate expression (verb) of the (current) path of love that they have for themselves.
“Anger is related also to not getting what you desire or want.”
Well sure, becoming angry from not getting what we desire is a very subjective expectation. That reality is void of ‘the Other’… “knowing”
So subjective expectations highlight a lack of mutual identification of each others True core needs.
The only way deeper core needs will be acknowledged or fulfilled by ‘the Other’ is when both people know exactly what they want in themselves…AND… they know specifically WHAT and WHY the other person needs certain behaviors in their partner.
But NONE of that mutual understanding can unfold without BRAVE COMMUNICATION.
People lack inner convictions. Just probe people. Dig deeper and find out what makes them tick. Most commonly, they are unsure of what they “want”. So one or each of the partners “attempt to seek” their missing identities through EXPECTING each need to be met, sans passionate self-honset communication.
An expressed self-honesty and a REAL empathy is the glue which can evolve ANY relationship. Yet I have found that many people are INCAPABLE of real empathy. Just probe, feel and observe.
So finding an ounce of self-honesty… first requires the death of our attached projections “to get something” out of the other.
You said it yourself here Gatubela on post 712…
” Zero Ego is Divine Ego. And this allows you to love, without wanting anything.”
Yes. “Without wanting” anything.
There is really no such manifestation as “zero ego” (24/7) unless we’re in a coma… because that would reveal (mean) a human who would act like a perpetual door mat in our harsh, uncompromising sociology of mundane survival.
So the ultimate self-mastery exists in finding a Divine Balance.
This means a complete synthesis of our Subjective worlds and Universal Objectivity. An Assertive Courage while feeling Receptive and Doubting. A Yin and a Yang. A Feminine and a Masculine. An Inner reality and the Outer Projections. Death in Life and Life in Death. All 12 signs Aries thru Pisces.
ALL of that, must speak to us.
When it does… our Soul “knows” Balance (with the ego).
Hi JoJo,
Heartful and soulful silence – is something I maintained for most of my married life.
Everyone thought I was frigid and unsocial. It was just that there were no “souls” to “soulcialize” with.
Some things are worth fighting for – I believe that I have said this same phrase elsewhere in this forum.
Death opens your senses to the abyss and its incredible energies. To have access to these energies – is to pass an incredible test of understanding and compassion. And to feel the things that you have explained.
There is a greater reason for all of this – as why would it be so important to go through all of this? The energy inside you must move – preferably to a higher frequency (love) and be expressed.
The VERB.
But to do what?
Here is where the uniqueness of our sameness really shines out.
…yes, we the people fear to love, but to love, we must forgave our own fear, for we must love ourselves to love others, so love our fear and move forward…I will keep all your love with me to heed to the silent lady’s call, there are messages in the warm embrace of darkness waiting for me, I will be back to share them once I find it.
I had hoped the message in the dark would be the ones I’ve being receiving: emotional but mostly awareness that opens my eyes to wonderful sight unseen.
I woke up from a nightmare, the shadows of the dark didn’t wait long this time. I woke up with bone deep fear and pain. I’m crying uncontrollably now …I have lost trust in the scorpion love, I have in the past opened and committed myself to the point of suicidal, and received in return terrible pain. My progressing sun entered Scorpio when I was very young, I’ve experienced meltdowns where I have no control of my emotions and just became self destructive, I tear my own books and sometime scratch myself in private. I had a violent sibling rivalry with my brother, and one day he hit me again and I was in such a rage I know I could kill him if he keep it up, he backed down, but I was terrified of what I would of committed, so from that day on, I start to learn to deaden my feelings, I kill them emotionally when pain gets unbearable. I’ve been doing this for almost thirty years, yet it took all I’ve got of deadening my feelings to barely survive the pain from a scorpion. I had believed I’ve loved the wrong man. Yet reality showed me they are more alike than they are different. Because I understand when emotion enters our reality it overwrites all reason. I understand them, I was in that position. I have all the compassion in the world for scorpions I know who has no intention to harm anyone, no one is responsible for inherit the brutal force of their emotions, but I also know what that emotion is capable of making us do. I had no doubt in my mind that he had loved me deeply, but he hurt me very badly. I don’t know how to trust when I know their emotion is beyond their control. I’m so afraid it usually took me a while to work up the mental preparation to read a message/comment, sometimes hours, sometimes I never want to read them.
I don’t know how to ever trust a scorpion again.
I’m so sorry for hurting feelings, but I must be truthful…I’m sorry.
hey jojo,
dont ever be sorry for your feelings.ok? so stop apologising.it has nothing to do with me. its about you and him, freudian slip? maybe.
i just want to say though… focus on trusting yourself from now on. i know you are hurting. it sucks. just be gentle with yourself from now on and do nice things for yourself. things keep changing.spend some time with animals.go run really fast on the beach till you are out of breath.remember that focused, strong woman that is inside of you. she is still there.you will trust again if you choose to. scorpions like sex.and they need to feel free.bye
I’m speaking in fear and pain…always be aware of the emotional expression.
Hi JoJo,
Sounds like you have a wonderful emotional life – I like your honesty and truth. Actually, as I was jogging to work today, I was thinking around the same thing that you have just wrote –
I like jogging to work because I meditate and go through downtown of the city I live in, and I get to see and feel the people and energy. I concentrate in trying to maintain my focus even when there is a lot of noise and comotion.
But, the thought that went through my head was…what is it (behind the facade) of the various faces that I passed by – that I am not seeing?
Well, you can see it with children – they are just too darn honest!!!
My children are recovering from violence – so violent behavior is the norm for them.
Since I encourage honesty with my children, all I hear – all day – is what an idiot, doofus, dumb ass, everyone else is…then comes the anger, the hitting, the scratching, the kicking…
They express happiness and love, as much as they do the other stuff – I permit it all – except the swearing part and the hitting part.
I look for balance. And I know when a day is good, when I see more love and less swearing and hitting.
Sometimes strong emotions in childhood are the result of misguidance and fear. I know my children, and I know that all is well, as long as they are honest. Most people would say that I am a careless mother – as I do not even prioritize cleanliness and order over their emotional health. I tell them to meditate and control their energy. If they feel violent and angry – just don´t be a “dumbass” about it.
The bottom rule that I teach them is …what you think about others, life will give it back to you. So, while you plop that other guys face, life will give you a real ass whopping later on.
The reason being is this…I just prefer for them to express it NOW – so that I can guide them into a healthy expression of their very strong emotions. I do not do this by DENYING my own capacity for violence. By understanding my own aggressive behavior, I can grow with them and they can grow with me.
Women should not allow themselves to be fooled that it is all unicorns and rainbows.
As my daughter likes to say…the world is a unicorn barfing rainbows…(hmmm deep thoughts)
The rest comes when the emotional strength of my children becomes more than my emotional strength and love for myself and my higher purpose for them. Parents usually do not have a higher purpose for themselves and do not soulfully teach their children to have one too. Also, they do not teach their children to “do it themselves”. Find out what you like – on your own. This philosophy certainly is not getting the dishes washed (they have been sitting for the past couple of days), but it permits my children to have a visual appreciation of the consequences of their actions of not doing it.
So, in your case, I believe that your mother was “absent”. As you still seem to feel some sort of wrongness in your emotions. No – there is nothing wrong with them – what is wrong is that you seem to think that there is.
Speaking in fear and pain – is the start of a very soulful healing process – and not just the bandaid on the boo boo.
As for your repressing your emotions – actually, whether you realize it or not, you are no longer repressing them. You are finding a healthy way to express them, as your concern for the feelings of other is incredibly noted.
For distrusting your (ex?) Scorpio…
You can not distrust a person for being honest – even in his brutal emotional force. Unless you “distrust” honesty. (???)
Nothing is more sinister, than someone hiding their true selves.
A scorpio is NOT a scorpio, unless they show themselves and their Hades. Just sit back and wait for it. The ones that don´t are the ones you should not trust.
When you understand this very fact, you will be able to lovingly handle anything that comes by.
I would trust strong emotion – more than no emotion at all.
We are NOT dead inside!!!
Hi P.Puppy,
Hmmm –
The source can manifest itself in various ways. This also what I meant by divine ego.
I do feel that their is a Divine order in things and this order has actually interfaced in my very limitted perception of it.
So while it may not manifest itself 24 – 7 , the keys or the path to its manifestation – even in daily slaughter activities (hey – that is where I am!!!hahaha!), could be someone´s higher purpose.
Divine ego is the result of following the path of the Great Work –
While finding balance is one way of looking at it, striving to manifest the Source, could be another.
This will not change the rules of this realm, as they are the limitting or controlling factors.
So, some people prefer to manifest a higher expression of what “normal” people consider “balance”.
It has been my experience that Balance is a subjective state that changes due to our connection to the Divine and our desire to manifest it (VERB).
When we know we live and die from the Soul, we know what needs to be said and done through the ego. = Balance.
If we have no capacity of deep catharsis, emotional transcendence and structure, we are spinning verbs wildly. = Ego.
An expressed ego, not in touch with the Soul, is a scattered delusion.;)
Hmmmm…
I like the way you said that…
The form in which we all live in sometimes is interfaced with divine reality. But what this reality is, is perceived differently depending on our surrender to the Source. The energy moves therefore a different definintion of balance is achieved through the very “transcending” activities you mention.
Sometimes I try to feel what the ultimate soulful balance is and the balance required to express that EGO. Just what exactly are the type of VERBS going around there???
I guess it is my attempt to read the end of the book, before actually starting on page 1.
Perhaps they are just “bunny” dreams.
“…Sometimes I try to feel what the ultimate soulful balance is and the balance required to express that EGO. Just what exactly are the type of VERBS going around there??? ”
As mentioned below, finding a spiritual ego Balance demands the TRUTH of who we ‘are not.’
That journey is Instinctual. Raw. Intense. Intuitive and Primal.
Seeking who we ‘are not’ is not cerebral.
Cerebral = Man’s Myth. Take a good intense look around you.
And yes, reading the end of the book before starting the book are pure bunny dreams.
” Hmmmm…
I like the way you said that… ”
I don’t only say it.
I Breathe it.;)
Thanks for all your concern…may I just gently say, please be aware and don’t fall back to our comfort-zone and find comfort in what’s familiar, instead find discomfort and it will lead you to more awareness.
I’m clam now, the tears/expression was healing. I’m discovering if I let my emotions run while be fully aware what I was expressing and make other fully aware of what I was expressing relived me of the guilt of a “unaware” expression of pain which cause harm, and cause guilt in return. But I’m also aware such expression is selfish, because without causing “harm” is withdrawing the “pain” which is the element of inducing awareness and change, avoiding meaningful human relating. but we can have anything we want, just not everything, self-healing without engaging first it is, putting the mask on the self first.
Don’t worry, I wasn’t suicidal in the physical sense, it’s in the self-awareness sense that I was willing to discard anything I’ve learned to please. This deep emotion of fear and pain gave me some deep awareness which happened almost immediately after the tears dried. May I ask you to be aware that what I am about to say next comes from my past experience, and many of my fears are rooted there, so to be self-honest, I have to open it up and relate the “past” to the “now”. I find the mental preparation technique actually works for me, it gave me emotional awareness to detach before engage.
The Scorpion to my new awareness has two evolutionary path that happens to them simultaneously, the first path is the path of evolution of the logic/understanding/control, translating into their morels and honorable characters and self discipline. the second path is the evolution of the emotional awareness, translating into awareness of self love, Cosmo love, love for others and the elevation of self-secure engagement. Most Scorpios (that of I’ve read or encountered in real life and the internet) are aware and activly participating in the first path to evolve, simply becasue being the most emotional of all human beings, they are actually the ones that are most averse to the brutal force of emotion, the same way the sons of alcoholics are most averse to influence yet often find them expressing pain the same way, alcohol. That’s why most of them avoid drama in others as much as they can. yet their true evolution lay in their emotional well-being, becasue god is teaching us through our emotions, the incredible depth of emotions of the scorpion is their source of un-limited potential to understand universal love and love for others in such profound depth it would be awe-striking. But we turn away from what we have, and want what we deem “important”, remember our insecurities, in the scorpion it translate to the craving for coolness, discipline.
In my new awareness, the three step equation of self–>humanity–>others, on a more profound level is “self love–>universal love –>love of others”. this is the scale of the Cosmo, with the Cosmo-love achieved by balancing the self-love on one side and love-for-others on the other side. we can not achieve a sustainable balance without each element. Yet the Scorpions as the master of self-sacrifices, they abused themselves to such profound degree, the ultimate display of love is total devotion: a complete lack of self in the equation of love. Most of them are completely unaware of their emotional evolution, they have started the path of self-abuse since they were merely children(including myself): scorpions started display emotional control by acknowledging the damage they could have done to themselves and others, mostly others due to their intense emotions. and you see the universal language of a Scorpio fighting the inner battle in the silence of their own caves to avoid harm to others. Yet god had told us the true self-growth lay in the way of relating. we heal by relating, by displaying, by being acknowledged. the silent cave is the island that a scorpion can get stranded indefinitely where their anger, fear, hurt, desire never understood by others. EVERY emotion is part of our make up of a healthy being, we simply cannot sustain a balanced love or “real love” without acknowledge ourselves in the rawest form to others. Most Scorpios are looking for “the one”, that one person they feel is safe to express self-love, meaning showing their inner vulnerabilities, this is so important to their well-being they cannot help seeking it. But in truth, they are seeking that channel of self-love, they are instinctively seeking the path of emotional evolution. Yet the form of which they seek it is by way of insecurities, meaning they place the power of the self-well being into an other person, into the trust they place into her. In fact, a Scorpio on the path of emotional evolution need to scrape the idea of “trust” from their known, becasue as I have discovered, healing begins by openness, and that what we display from that unwavering confidence of self-worth do not need approval from ANYONE. The intense nature of scorpion emotions made it hard to let out self-expression without consequences, so that iron will and control a Scorpio acquired through his logical evolution should be channeled to find ways of safe self-expression: segmenting, spreading, or even blogging… This is not to say we don’t seek our soul mate, everyone on this face of earth yearn for a soul mate, yet most of us do not depend so much of our emotional well being on one person. most of us were never asked to sacrifices self-love for love-for-others by god.
The awareness of a Scorpion reality is so very different from the Scorpion reality in the real world we live in. In my past relationship, during all of our times together, he had never said one negative thing about me, and never truly voiced his “wants” “needs” to me directly, and his scale of love just simply clasped half way through, we just simply cannot handle a love where we denies ourselves our own voice. His frustration and pain was never healthily acknowledged via mutually understood “expressing”, so much confusion, insecurities, and pain for everyone involved. I have to guess what he was feeling and needing, and sometimes I was right, yet my communication of how I respond to his need was never understood, becasue a man without self-love cannot really love others, he’s hurting too much inside. A man without self-love only exist in his feeling for her, and to him she doesn’t exist, what exist in his awareness is her response to his feelings for her. I witness the same self-denial in every Scorpio I encountered, including highly evolved ones, there was an evolved Scorpio who had married a Libra for over ten years, yet he is still caught in all the pain from his mother-in-law’s interaction in their lives. the relationship of mother and daughter/son-in-law is that of open warfare.
Before I went to bed last night, in the darkness of silence, I was visiting my castle in defense, I ask the knights setting swords at the door and wouldn’t back off this question: the plutonians came in peace, why then are you still guarding at the gate? they wouldn’t answerer me, yet they look at me with their unwavering gaze from a face of war paints and fatigue. I looked at their stances, their sword pointing at the gate and their back to their homes, and I understood, these are fathers to sons, sons to mothers, husbands to wives. They have so much love, so many loved ones at stake. They looked at me, becasue they do not trust anyone come in peace or otherwise, they trust me, they are me, they want to know where I will be if things fall out. so I went to the farms and visited homes of my castle. yes, so much is at stake.
I see the face of that my mother, this is a woman who in all honesty, a product of society and has every trapping of materialistic values in her, she is a living being, she interacted with everyone via her understanding of this world, she interfered in my marriage countless times when she “sees” I was “mistreated”, I never interfered her, becasue I didn’t care about my husband enough to care, and I didn’t really “love” her, love as in helping her becoming a well being. I see the sleeping eyes of the knight in her silently asking me: where will you be when I interfere again? what will you do to change me when I feel the pain of your “betrayal”? where will you be if there are sides to be taken? This is a woman since her betrayal to me, made every decision to “look out” for me, and never made a conscious choice to harm me ever since, she sacrified herself many many times for me, I would never abandon her, no matter if she is astrologically insane or even if she is really insane.
So this is the trappings of real life, that you come with everyone you attached to through life, you never really loved anyone of them, becasue you simply never “loved”, yet with change, everything changes, you will start to “really love” everyone for their well being, including yourself, through it all there will be a lot of pain involved and need so much genuine compassion from the plutonian, achieved only through a cosmically balanced love, awareness, evolution, evidenced only through his genuine self-love. The emotional evolution is the elation of self, where the higher you go the more people enter your line of vision, the more security in engage with them instead of avoiding them. The past relationship, the only awareness of “all I want is to be with you, why then you don’t feel the same?” in him, the carnage of the discard human beings who’s only true crime is we never loved them or don’t love them no more, or in the case of the evolved scorpion ” they are not who we want to associate with” I see that carnage on the floor and know the only thing stood between me and that carnage is his feelings for me, an emotion he is unaware and out of control and without the self-love, is going no where in him, so, in reality, there was nothing stood between that carnage and me and everyone I love, I’m scared to become him if I lose all my objectivity and compassion for others when the depth of passion that I know sleeps so real inside of me gets control over me. this picture scares the living day light out of me.
love, jojo
Thinking what we are = Ego
Knowing what we are not = Soul
Evolved, intricate Male Scorpio = Total Ego
Most people express ego identity from the neck-up.
They “think” they know who they are. Yet they are light years away from knowing who they ‘are not’
Scorpionic energy would understand me here.
… So knowing who we are not, requires emotional awakenings and transformation via utter death and birth of old ego attachments and their consequent realities.
Our Souls are of Different Ages.
A few billion souls are babies, another billion are waddling and falling… and then there are ancient souls who are as old and seasoned as Yoda.
Are and Are Not…I agree with you 100%.
The ancient souls you speak of are wondrous to behold and a privilege to know. 🙂
Though we are all souls free of ego by our very nature, ego closes the veil of true consciousness and blinds us to the true nature of who and what we are and are not. I find it interesting that we, as a species, all know on some conscious level that the Ego, powerful in its ability to seduce and deceive, fears that which it cannot understand or control and manipulates us accordingly, but we typically ignore that fact and see the veil as natural and necessary. Sure, we may delude ourselves into believing we have struggled against it and won because we manage to squeak out a few victories, but ultimately we give up and succumb because ego is easy. I’d even go so far as to say these “victories” themselves are often part of the decption because they did not spring forth from true transformation. To really SEE the truth, and UNDERSTAND it, requires courage, strength and also the much underrated ability to close your eyes, turn off your “mind” and “logic”, and abandon yourself body and soul to FEELING. It is not an easy path, and thus, we see the perpetual cycle of flipping back and forth between soul and ego, hopefully moving us closer to true soulfulness with each rebirth.
Still, for all its imperfections, the process of becoming holds a particular beauty and is wondrous in its own right. To experience or witness that transformation is miraculous indeed. 🙂
Yes, it is miraculous to feel.
Still, human ego has different octaves, or levels of seeing and not seeing. That insight… or lack thereof… is relative to our identity’s relationship with the heart and soul… and the heart and soul of another.
We could not possibly work, put food on the table, pay the mortgage, attain greatness in the business and social world… if we sharing “zero ego.”
We live in human form. On this earth. Not on cloud 99.
We simply ‘need’ ego, it is our precious Mask to the world … in order to survive and flourish here on pragmatic earth.
The inner question remains of what we do with it.
We can either cultivate a higher, deeper ego via the battlefield ongoing in the deep instinctual soul… or… we can abuse ego power among others and corrupt others with our blindness, fears and self-delusions… and our own lack of identification (or faith) with the immortal soul.
Nice input Phoenix.
Happy face.;)
Of course we need the ego to function, that goes without saying. I assumed it would be obvious what I meant since I was speaking to the spiritual side, which is what everyone has been discussing. 😛
I like what you said though about the ego having octaves…nice way of describing it.
Happy face back at ya. 🙂
Hi JoJo,
Are you alright?
Just spit it all out, girl!!!
Hmmm…don´t worry about those nightmares. I used to have alot of those (among other things.) For example, I knew that there was an indian reservation where we used to live, by the “people” that came to visit me at night!!!
This is the problem…the knowing. The fact that your physical reality is not balanced with the one that comes in the night and perhaps your fear of the abyss and the death that it is asking from you.
It must feel strange to want to control it, instead of balance it.
Say a prayer before going to bed – for yourself and for the darkness. It will treat you like a lady, as long as you are one.
hmmm…I’m kind of feeling embarrassed for all the attention and don’t know what to say, in a real life environment I would batter my eyelashes at this point and offer every one orange juice.
with or without ice?
😛
Oh, as a juice party conversation, I will let out one shocking secret: I feel Dalia lama is a hypocrite and Gandhi was a genuine. By way of seeing the first is too comfortable in his own praise and the later feels home at jail.
Interesting…personally, I have never found the Dalai Lama to be hypocritical, quite the opposite in fact.
However, to each his or her own. 🙂
hmm, if a man has genuine humanity in him, he will know no matter how right he felt his cause is, he is in fact harming the opposite of his stand in very real human sense, and there is always the possibility that he could be wrong, therefore he would feel home at jail and not in the glory of the carnage he left on his path.
over, and out.
major V peace V
The same could be said of many great human beings who stood up for what they believe in despite the bloodshed perpetrated by others, whether in their name or against it, and since the Dalai Lama hasn`t killed anyone, I find it difficult to accuse him of taking glory in anyones death. It`s all a matter of perspective and semantics I think, and depends entirely on your personal beliefs and opinions.
Gandhi is no exception to controversy either by the way, and one example is the criticism about his racist views during the early 1900`s, and his backing of white supremacy in Africa at the time. This is further illustrated by his support of the British during the Zulu Wars when he urged the government to recruit Indians to fight along side the British troops. He is also quoted as urging Indians living in Africa to join the war against the Zulus. Certainly there was much carnage left on that path.
I also firmly believe it should never be necessary to spend your life in jail to prove genuine humanity. What purpose did it serve to incarcerate either man beyond satisfying the desires of those of the opposing view?
Anyway my point is merely that nothing is ever black and white where war and religion are concerned, and especially not when they mix.
Peace to you also. 🙂
Didn’t sleep much last night, strangely there was nothing much in the silence, a genuine silence of empty spaces. I think I will let the day light come in and spend more quality time with my son the cutest little lion, to the idea of donating his blankey he fiercely replies: I donate you to the lava.
yes, until I have more meaningful experience to share.
until then,
love, jojo
Hmmmm,
It seems that the forum is starting to be like this:
http://www.fwallpapers.net/es/Bald-Eagles-Alaska.html
If you click, you will see a picture of a bunch of eagles.
And I am like this:
http://icanhascheezburger.com/2010/11/25/funny-pictures-gif-cat-eagle-thanksgiving/
I used to have a Doberman Puppy – and her best friend was a little black cat.
They grew up together since puppy and kitty cat. They ran up and down the house, playing with each other, creating havoc.
Eventually, the size difference was “noticeable”. Every morning in winter (it only rains here), I let this huge dog into the house and let her sleep near the wood stove that we had. That cat knew this routine, and she was waiting on the sofa.
Then, the pounce.
She would do this cat flip thingy and land with her claws dug into my Doberman´s back. That dog would cry, whine and whimper – but she never caused that cat any harm. It was absolutely incredible, even when they were playing, she would have the cat´s head between her jaws – and not one nick! That darn cat would get angry, but the doberman loved the cat and when kitty started to scratch to much, she just put a paw on top of her, and waited for her to calm down.
Cats and Puppies can get along quite beautifully.
Hmmm – it says that the comment is awaiting moderation –
I thought it was pretty “moderate” – nothing strong there!!!
I had posted a comment before post 745 – it contained two images:
How the forum is becoming:
http://www.fwallpapers.net/es/Bald-Eagles-Alaska.html
and me:
And I told the story of a Doberman and a cat that I once had.
Actually, it kind of makes me sad to tell it, because I really loved those two.
Well, She was a beautiful Doberman puppy, that I was training. You have to have them as puppies in order to do this. So, I raised her with a black kitty cat – she was just 1 month old. Other times, I have raised dogs with…you guessed it…
Bunnies.
Those two slept together – every night, all cuddled up and snuggly. They would eat together – and the puppy would share her food. They played – running up and down the halls and creating destruction and havoc.
Eventually, the Doberman became a beautiful, huge and dangerous dog. Her training was exquisite. Those of you who know dog training, you must train the dog first in obediance first – then you can proceed to the attack. The dog has to resist all temptations (poisoned meat etc. other dogs) know how recognize potential enemies and weapons and not be afraid of them. You train them physically, and yes, even with obstacle courses.
Eventually, you do not talk to the dog – because the dogs knows you SO well, that comunication is no longer necessary.
But for you to get a better idea of the incredible discipline of a dog that is properly and lovingly trained – she was in the middle of the jump to attack a drunk person who just opened the gate, and at my order, she stopped, in mid-air.
A well trained dog will never attack for attacking. You work with them in order to understand their body language and what they hear – as they see everything before you do. So, you know that the person is behind that tree, 10 meters ahead of you, because the dog told you.
The cat became absolutely adorable – but still a cat.
Every morning in winter, I would open the door and let the dog in (it only rains here, so it was not cold)
That cat would be waiting for her, most strategically and patiently hidden on the black sofa, awaiting the dog´s enthusiasm to enter, its tail flickering every once so often.
The pounce.
All of a sudden you would hear the dog whine, cry or whimper and see this cat, with her claws dug into her back.
But due to the fact that the doberman loved that cat, she NEVER caused that cat harm – those animal impulses were just not there! That cat however, could never get rid of her nature of being a cat with this doberman. She would clean her, purr with her, and snuggle her, and when they were playfighting, she would get angry and complain. The doberman, while playing with her, would lie down (she was just too big to play standing up), and even put the cat´s head between her jaws. All of us would be holding our breathes.
Other than the fact that the cat received a huge slober bath and became soaking wet, not even the skin was nicked.
Ladies, a well trained warrier fights the whole battle, first in the abyss and wins. What we see, was never the battle.
It deals alot with those bunny dreams I was talking about.
hmmm – I may be repeating here – but I seem to have trouble posting – so I will get rid of the links.
I had posted a comment before post 745 – it contained two links to images.
And I told the story of a Doberman and a cat that I once had.
Actually, it kind of makes me sad to tell it, because I really loved those two.
Well, She was a beautiful Doberman puppy, that I was training. You have to have them as puppies in order to do this. So, I raised her with a black kitty cat – she was just 1 month old. Other times, I have raised dogs with…you guessed it…
Bunnies.
Those two slept together – every night, all cuddled up and snuggly. They would eat together – and the puppy would share her food. They played – running up and down the halls and creating destruction and havoc.
Eventually, the Doberman became a beautiful, huge and dangerous dog. Her training was exquisite. Those of you who know dog training, you must train the dog first in obediance first – then you can proceed to the attack. The dog has to resist all temptations (poisoned meat etc. other dogs) know how recognize potential enemies and weapons and not be afraid of them. You train them physically, and yes, even with obstacle courses.
Eventually, you do not talk to the dog – because the dogs knows you SO well, that comunication is no longer necessary.
But for you to get a better idea of the incredible discipline of a dog that is properly and lovingly trained – she was in the middle of the jump to attack a drunk person who just opened the gate, and at my order, she stopped, in mid-air.
A well trained dog will never attack for attacking. You work with them in order to understand their body language and what they hear – as they see everything before you do. So, you know that the person is behind that tree, 10 meters ahead of you, because the dog told you.
The cat became absolutely adorable – but still a cat.
Every morning in winter, I would open the door and let the dog in (it only rains here, so it was not cold)
That cat would be waiting for her, most strategically and patiently hidden on the black sofa, awaiting the dog´s enthusiasm to enter, its tail flickering every once so often.
The pounce.
All of a sudden you would hear the dog whine, cry or whimper and see this cat, with her claws dug into her back.
But due to the fact that the doberman loved that cat, she NEVER caused that cat harm – those animal impulses were just not there! That cat however, could never get rid of her nature of being a cat with this doberman. She would clean her, purr with her, and snuggle her, and when they were playfighting, she would get angry and complain. The doberman, while playing with her, would lie down (she was just too big to play standing up), and even put the cat´s head between her jaws. All of us would be holding our breathes.
Other than the fact that the cat received a huge slober bath and became soaking wet, not even the skin was nicked.
Ladies, a well trained warrier fights the whole battle, first in the abyss and wins. What we see, was never the battle.
It deals alot with those bunny dreams I was talking about.
When the cat was too angry – the dog would just put a paw on top of her. Kitty cat listened real quick.
Once in a while, you would see the dog jump like a cat…(hey dogs don´t do that)
But when the other dogs came by, kitty would run to the Doberman and hide in its legs.
This relationship between these two, touched the hearts of everyone who entered the house.
So – even though puppies grow up to be extremely dangerous, and well trained fighting machines – I have worked with Dobermans and Rottweilers…
When there is a bond, it seems that they can willingly restrain their “sharp as a knife” impulses, and play nice.
After I start the day, emotions of deep gratefulness begin to wash over me in waves, and along with it, came the crystal clear awareness, this is the first time this had happened on my journey of self, that emotion and awareness has united.
Puppy said seek “who we are not” is the soul, and seek “who we are” is the ego, my dearest beautiful Scorpios of the world, this the evidence of your god-given gift of sacrifices to the self, you instinctively write off the self from the scale of self-worth, that we must seek “who we are” AND we must seek “who we are not”. we are not complete without either one. That is not your fault, that is your beauty and strength, your gift, do not turn away from it, LOVE YOURSELVES and do not turn a blind eye from the scale of character: what is our greatest strength on one hand, is our greatest weakness on the other. Me, the reincarnation of the scale it’s self, I can see it so very clearly, yet in the reality of life I can hardly enforce it, the greatest weakness of my greatest strength. And in the Cosmo of unity, we help each other by heed to eachother’s weakness with our own strength. We unite uniqueness to achieve a higher level of human awareness. So I’m going to tell you who you are as I see it, the Scorpios of this world, the enforcer of god.
I want to gave my deepest appreciation to the two very special Scorpio men I have the fate to meet. the first has in his deep goodness and openness let me stepped into his soul for a few month without consciously knowing it, through you I have witnessed the true beauty of the Scorpio strength. and the second who had initiated me on my journey through his deep good intention in selfless sharing, through you I have reinforced that beauty what I already seen and opened up to new awareness that take me here today.
So every Scorpio man who will ever read this, step with me, in to the room of mirrors, look deep in the image in front of you, what I see there, through your eyes, is a man of incredible focus, iron will, incredible mastery of the mind and the physique, incredible dedication, abusive ability to self-sacrifices, deep sense of honor, deep self honesty, deep sensitivity, unlimited potential to love, deep sense of right and wrong, incredible courage and bravery, and deep sense of humbleness in accepting truth which you inevitably sense when facing it. These are some of your GOD-GIVEN gift of character built in you that I can name from the top of my head just becasue the presence of bottomless emotions. the drop of the stone can cause such a ripple. This is not to count the individualistic talent and strength. This is who everyone of you ARE, through your connection to god, never lose sight of this man in the mirror, becasue even if you turn away from it, you never lose the ability to get it back, as I used to live in total mind numbness for many years, yet it only took a few months of concentration I got it all back. even when I was mind numb, if someone tell me I was not intelligent I would laugh in their face, I just know, but never felt it was important, remember, our unwavering confidence of self-worth is the center you can visit any time of our choosing, some people just never choose to look for it.
Now close your eyes, see deep deep down inside your being, travel all the way to the place where is beating, you heart, imagine you are looking at “the one”, sense the incredible love, the way heart swell, and expend, see it’s potential to erase all boundaries in the WILLINGNESS and DEVOTION to love. This is your ABILITY to LOVE, it doesn’t have to be point at anyone, this is you CAPABILITY to the emotion that is LOVE.
Now open your eyes again, see your image in the mirror, see it with all your scars, pain, joy, happiness, despair, hope, hate, love, riches, poor… everything, this is the RICHNESS of the life you lived, it adds on top of WHO YOU ARE, it does not subtract anything from what you are born with, and the ripples of the burden of emotion. your curse/your gift. the greatest strength and greatest weakness, you have accumulate so many traits just to survive with that gift of emotion in you, you have achieved ultimate sacrifices since you are a child: to restrain the self to protect the ones we HATE, yes, you did not do it for the ones we love, you did it to protect people you hate, becasue they cause you harm yet you cannot harm them in return because of your intensity.
Now imagine you are taking away all that experiences and going back to your first love, before you were BETRAYED, yes, every Scorpio who hasn’t deadened his feelings was betrayed when they first open up, they just cannot handle their own emotions and if they can’t no one in this entire Cosmo can handle that emotion, let alone the first girl your ever loved. BEFORE that betrayal, only focus on THAT experience of your past, do you feel that incredible JOY, and HAPPINESS? yes, now look at your experience after that FIRST, do you see the mistrust? and the inevitability of the fail of the second relationship and every relationship ever since until you find the one? do you see what I see, that YOU are the one who KILLED every JOY and HAPPINESS before it has a chance to start with every relationship that followed. your INSECURITIES, which in reality, holds no candle to your worth. you must find that self-love to be whole. only when you are whole you can handle your emotions, and you are the ONLY one who is truly capable doing so, you are the dragon rider, don’t blame the girl who fainted at it’s fiery breath. and you need to look at the mirror and know if this man cries in front of a CROWED, he should feel no SHAME, he should feel FREE, he is FAR stronger than everyone combines, the weakness and blindness of the crowed has no idea that TEAR is the WAR CALL to tame that DRAGON, it has the very potential to devour that weakness and blindness of the crowed if let free. There is no shame in expressing the tame of the dragon, because you are the ENFORCERS of god, you must acknowledge this fact in you, embrace your EGO, that is who you are, you do not turn away from the pride of being a warrior, a dragon tamer, a god enforcer. you EGO is god given at the right direction, because it has a PURPOSE to make you feel STRONG, and STRONGER, and KNOWING you do not abuse it becasue you have TRAINED yourself to be the NOBLE you, without nobility of sacrifice yourself for those you HATE, you won’t be able to grow up and become a functional part of society, god had made sure of that by giving a dragon to you at birth. You are a WARRIOR, a ENFORCER, you are not YODA, you will never be yoda, all the yoda’s of the Cosmo will cry if warriors become monks, who then will protect and enforce? do you see it as I see it? that every one of the rest of us is missing some parts of the discipline or focus or heart or mind or soul to be a total being who can DELIVER what they believe in, you are the TOTAL, the god enforcer.
Why then are you looking for THE ONE in your life? you are THE ONE to ANY woman of your chosen, if you don’t delegate YOUR OWN responsibility of taming that dragon, if you don’t find that free man who laughs after he cried in a crowed of ridicule, who hugs his lady after he begged for her forgiveness in the town square, you never will tame your dragon, you never will fulfill your destiny. Why then do you care the opinion of the weakness around you? don’t. you know it in yourself that no one understands pain better than you because no one has experienced as profoundly. no one has more capacity to tolerate darkness better than you who had lived it, YOU ARE THE ONE. every women you encounters is YOU in insecurity, they close up and feel fear when they feel mistrust and rejection, when you are “the one”, they are the YOU who couldn’t help but feel hope and openness in the total acceptance, understanding, compassion, love. you CAN open up ANY woman of your choosing. GOD is teaching us in our honest emotions. so, find that warrior, and be him. He is your purpose, without clarity to this purpose your EGO is detached from its purpose and sever as the INSECURITIES that holds you back to your destiny.
Your destiny, see in your souls eyes the life you have lived, do you see the randomness of callings? do you see the total lack of a PLAN, a STRATEGY, a PURPOSE, a MASTER MIND? you step up at random situations where everyone steps back, even if that means to pay for everyone when you are totally broke, you heed your call of honor without a plan because of the BORN goodness in you, therefore you never leave the claws of disaster the bitch. DO NOT WASTE anything that you’ve learned, your “iron will” has a purpose, it gives you the control to stay on track of becoming strong first even it means to resist your callings-that-subtract-your-purpose, love yourself first, build yourself first, your “ego” has a purpose, it gives you the strength to step up to your greatness. you are not that little old lady who hands out her last dim to the unfortunate, you are the man who kept his last dim but vow to himself to come back one day to rebuilt the town with EVERYONE in it and does. You find way to sustain your strength and BECOME increasingly stronger in the mind the heart and the materiel world, meanwhile give when you can without harming yourself and your plan. YOU NEED A PLAN, and you ARE master minds of plans, GO DO IT.
OK, now open the door to the room of mirrors, and close it gently behind you.
Step outside, and start to LIVE.
Hey… JoJo and Gatubela, please listen up.
Everyone must STAY ON TOPIC.
These topics are:
Scorpio males, clubbing female Scorpios’s… hahaha, Reltionships, Astrology and Social Dynamics.
Anything else is a completely unrelated babblethon.
Honestly… I don’t have the patience to read a 40,000 word post about someone’s whimsical adventure or mind puff.
Please be CONCISE.
The male Scorpio brotherhood demands it that way.
Thank you.;)
“…clubbing female Scorpios…” hahahahhahaha….thanks for that! But seriously…where exactly does this fit into the spiritual message you`re trying to be master of?
No matter, give it your best shot if you feel this is a spiritually worthwhile endeavour…the Scorpio sisterhood is not afraid. 😉
One more thing Pluto Puppy…I cannot resist and simply HAVE to ask: Just who do you think you are to demand everyone else adhere to your personal rules about what they can and cannot write about? I REALLY hope you were kidding with that post, but if not…Phew, arrogant much? :p
Gatubela, I truly enjoyed your story about the dog and cat, and many of the other things you’ve added here. You too JoJo. 🙂 So girls, I hope you keep on writing whatever the heck you want to! 😉
Read the title of this blog.
My spirituality is known through expressed candor, courage and honesty. Yet an onlooker ego assimilates my directness as arrogance. Too funny.
What frequency of spirituality does that ego see?? None. Honesty in a male threatens her. No surprise there.
Sprituality has Boundaries. Ethics. Laws and TRUTH.
This blog is no different. If you want to fight me, knock yourself out.
I speak up for the collective. Again, look at the blog title. Who are you to tell me what I can say and not say?
Get a perspective already.
No smiley face. A plain faced glare.;)
There is only one person here… “trying to be master of”
And it is not me.;)
I have no intention of fighting you because there is nothing worthwhile fighting about. I have indeed formed an opinion about you, that is MY TRUTH. You’ve made up your mind about me clearly, and that is YOUR TRUTH. Neither of us are ever going to agree, but why should that matter? It doesn’t to me in the least, and despite our differences of opinion, I still find this blog an entertaining read and enjoy posting on it when I feel there is something I want to say. It is open to the public no?
Oh, and I didn’t tell you what you can and cannot say. I merely questioned why you would impose your beliefs on others in that way, and gave my opinion of it. I hope others will do the same, and will have no problem if they disagree with me.
Perspective? Got it in abundance…you just refuse to see that because our perspectives clash. What frequency of spirituality do I see? More than one, but most importantly, I try to see the beautiful spirit in everyone without malice or scorn, even when I find them distasteful. How many frequencies do you see? What about unconditional love, forgiveness kindness and acceptance of others? Do you see that frequency or is it only reserved for females not born between Oct 23 – Nov 21? You said in a past post that there would never be a Scorpio female here baring her soul, well here I am doing just that, so why is what I say less valid in your eyes than what the other women here say? I’m quite curious about this.
Also, what “honesty” of yours am I supposedly fearing? I find that whole assertion vague in the extreme, and a sweeping inaccuracy. How can you possibly accuse me of being afraid of male honesty? You don’t even know me and we’ve barely spoken. Is it because I don’t agree 100% with everything you say? If so, then I respectfully disagree with your definition of honesty.
The only thing I want to be master of is the integrity of my beliefs and my right to assert them, the same as you and everyone else posting here. If you think I am afraid of your honesty and wrong about everything, then be a spiritual guide and convince me of it or simply accept me with tolerance, don’t just insult me and call on the others to ‘club’ me. I’ve already told you I agree with many of your views, so what part of your “honesty” am I missing the point on? I ask this sincerely.
I meet your plain faced glare with a warm smile and impish twinkle in my eyes. 😉
…”I have indeed formed an opinion about you, that is MY TRUTH…”
No. Your opinion is not Truth. Your opinion is Manipulation. The motivation to manipulate. One day, or never… you will see that self-knowledge.
Still not sinking in? Here, let me show you loud Hypocrisy and Self-Delusion in motion.
…”No matter, give it your best shot if you feel this is a spiritually worthwhile endeavour.”
Yet in your follow up comment you resign the motivation here…
“…I have no intention of fighting you because there is nothing worthwhile fighting about…”
Ahhh, NO… you intially DID have the intention to fight. Just more lies. I see that non-spiritual cowardly retort everyday.
If you are so spiritually self-aware, how come you do not see your weightless illusions?
“…No. Your opinion is not Truth. Your opinion is Manipulation. The motivation to manipulate. One day, or never… you will see that self-knowledge…”
I disagree, my opinion is the TRUTH as I see it the same way yours is to you, it is merely that WE BOTH see a different TRUTH and both are valid. So I say, why is my opinion of you a ‘motivation to manipulate’, but your opinion of me honesty?
No it isn’t “sinking in” because the two comments of mine you quoted are not in conflict, one follows the other, it doesn’t contradict. I am not fighting and never had the intention to fight. You have completely misread my comments, much like I apparently misread the intention of yours being arrogant. I do not lie, I have no reason to, and I meant it when I said “give it your best shot” because I had no intention of fighting back. I could have put it another way “…go for it, whatever, have fun, not gonna go there with ya but you’ll be proving my point that you aren’t spiritual if you do it.” So, what you say here makes no sense because it’s predicated on a complete misunderstanding. My only interest was in pointing out that advocating “Clubbing” me would not be a very spiritual thing to do for the “fun of it”, and had you done so, you would have proved yourself to be a bit of a hypocrite don’t you think?
“…If you are so spiritually self-aware, how come you do not see your weightless illusions?…”
These aren’t weightless illusions because you misinterpreted what I said and I haven’t laid down any gauntlets whatsoever.
I still smile warmly. 🙂
Fitting. You fail to answer the fundamental meaning in what I had asked of you. A liar can never answer a straight question. They need to twist and contort. They hide behind the veil of deception. Nihilism.
Play your twisted games behind that contrived smile you advertise with your husband.
I’m done with you.;)
Wow, how very sad. You know, I was going to blast you for calling me a liar etc, but I felt an overwhelming sense of peace all of a sudden and realized that I pity you Pluto Puppy, truly from the depths of my heart and soul I pity you. To live with the kind of anger, venom and hatred that is coming through your words is incomprehensible to me. Your hypocrisy and irrational behaviour absolutely shines through each post you’ve made to me, a woman you’ve never even met, and it’s such a shame.
There is no point in me replying to what you just said because I think it’s complete and utter drivel. I will only say one more thing, Don’t you EVER mention my husband again in that way. I will NOT tolerate you being disrespectful of my marriage, my opinions voiced here you may comment on, but not my private life and family. Not cool Pluto, not cool.
Yes sir, lol, I actually totally get the message from the brotherhood of Scorpios. @_@
major V peace V
Hi P.Puppy,
Yawn * stretch * purrrrr *
Strangely, I am all “meowed” out.
phoenix
actually it’s a very good thing to be able to tell others what we like or don’t like when we see it, especially coming from a male Scorpio, the real problem would be he’s not saying anything about anything, what you see here it’s meaningful communication sans confusion and sans sidetracking, it’s self love. the message is clearly received and aware of now.
…don’t take the clubbing thing to heart, it’s quite obvious to me a joke, the hurt of accumulated resentment from the past is very real, it’s expressed and acknowledged, but not worth protecting, is it? isn’t real communication much more exciting than resentments? I was born on the last day of been a Libra, and I identify myself as part female Scorpio, I took some very direct hit right on the forehead, yup, fancy hits too *peace*, yeah it hurts, but the hurt pass, let it pass, it’s not that a big deal right? because the parts that are real(not necessarily limited to female Scorpios only) is good for us, and the parts that are not real the male Scorpio himself is more than willing to self-acknowledge it, in fact he’s seeking that truth in transformation.
I took a chainsaw to everyone here couple days ago, name calling and the whole nine yard all the way through, yeah, major action there, and we get pass that and move forward, it’s really all about honesty and communication, nothing personal.
major V peace V, aka the peace lady.
Thanks JoJo, I think you’re a very enlightened and fun loving Libra/Scorpio. 🙂
Oh, I didn’t take the clubbing thing to heart in the way you might think, it’s just that I feel it is important to give him my perspective and question the intent behind it. There is much written here about female scorpios lacking a soul and conscience, and quite scornfully, so I take it upon myself to speak up because I do not trust him with respect to his biases there. I have no problem taking hits when warranted, but unfortunately, forums etc, make misunderstandings all too easy, and as you can see, two scorpios tend to have a natural affinity for that. Truly though I’m not taking any of this personally at all, again I think it’s hard to effectively convey that when writing, especially when I tend to be direct. I’m tryin though! :p
I did read your chainsaw post and thought WOW, she’s PISSED! Hehehe…but I’m glad it made you feel better, and I have read your past posts so I do understand where you are coming from.
Warmest wishes of happiness to you Peace Lady. 🙂
hmmm… if I may be honest, it won’t hurt more to acknowledge hurt, really, in my years of fighting the mob mentality, there are certain techniques we used, one of which is called ” identifying points of excitement”, which means you observe a person in his/her usual behavior, when he/she did not jump in when chainsaws are used, yet jump in at the point he/she jumps in the action, that’s his/her ticker point, very personal emotional triggers that excites a person out his/her usual behavior, and you would take that point and observe any claim of “objectivity” and take that as the bottom card and crumble the whole house of cards that person built on his/her “objectivity”, this type person has one major common behavior pattern which is they DO NOT jump in on their own behalf, either that of his/her “group”, or that of “someone” else, the closeness of personal engagement is too close a threat to admit his/her true motivation.
Honesty with major peace and a big hug.
Exactly JoJo, I do mostly agree with you, except hurt isn’t the right word, outraged by prejudice perhaps would be more appropriate. 😉 Neither Pluto Puppy and I are objective when it comes to this one subject of contention and I’ll happily own that with respect to myself. If you notice, I have never argued with PP about much else, since I think we have similar views about most things, though I am not sure he would agree.
So that said, I will explain why I didn`t jump in when chainsaws were used or in many posts before. Firstly, I cannot offer an advice when it comes to most questions here revolving around relationships with male scorps, because I haven’t been in one as an adult. Secondly, I typically only write when I feel I have something of value to add, or I feel strongly about it. Perhaps I should rethink that and offer more. Oh and when chainsaws are used, well sometimes it is best to let the motor run out of gas first. 😉
I am happy you replied with your perspective it was very on point and I appreciate your honesty very much. 🙂
Big hug back with a great big smile.
Hmmm…ok but honestly? I really don’t see the difference in saying it the way I did vs the way you suggested, and I’m not convinced that being more blunt would have “kicked his butt” at all. What I said was an honest expression of my outrage, which wasn’t about him disrespecting me, it was about his hypocrisy and irrational prejudice towards an entire group of women, not just me. I wasn’t intentionally trying to be politically correct, but I do favour a more formal style of writing and arguing, that is very true! Also, I meant what I said about not wanting to fight, I’d much rather convince PP he was wrong about Scorpio women through calm and open and honest dialogue. 🙂
Yes I am happily married to a very strong man and am brutally honest with my husband, as he is with me. That’s one of the reasons our marriage has lasted this long. Twenty years now…OMG! :p
Anyway, I just see another post and I believe I am ready to take your advice and be BLUNT.
Hugs and peace to you JoJo. 🙂
hmm, let’s just assume you have jumped in, and instead of say who are you bla bla… you say this: look mister, I don’t care if you are joking, this is a female Scorpio here and I’ll kick your butt if you disrespect me again without cause.
see you would of kicked major butts and if he keeps it up, you are very much in titled to say: insensitive jerk!!!
this is called the win win situation of be honest, you never lose with honesty and you get the resentment acknowledged and he gets the kick if you feel he deserve it. the only true and un-challenged motivation for attack is self-defense under duress. you see, you don’t need to be likable to be liked, you can be brutally honest and be admired, true you run the risk of not getting a soft man as a mate, they run away, lol, but you don’t need a weak man in you life do you? and you are happily married, nothing to lose. lol.
take to heart what I say and be a interesting woman instead a politically correct one, we’ve got too many politicians as is. *wink*
oh, and I do want to tell you one thing tho, I do not appreciate to have my comment of my own experience as an attempt to comfort you used against someone I greatly admire, and I would not appreciate if my self-identity as part Scorpio female to be used as any future reference to use against him/his comments, as I see you have the tendency to do so. you don’t need to explain, just acknowledge it and refrain from doing it again. this is serious to me, so treat it as very serious communication.
Thanks
Whoa JoJo, I did no such thing, not that I know of. I am completely at a loss to understand what you mean, so please do feel free to tell me what I said that crossed the line with you. It was never my intention to do so.
I don’t know, I’m rolling my eyes and laughing, this is actually comical.
as always, major V peace V
over and out! as in kind of really relived.
Jeeze JoJo, you freaked me out! hahahaha…LOL!
Peace and hugs, as in also really relieved.
WTH?! are you insane? why are you laughing? you really are freaking me out now, do you have no ability to recognize what people are saying to you?
this is hard for a peace lady to say, but you are freaking me out, so please don’t talk to me anymore.
Nope I am not insane I was responding to your last post where you were laughing. So…? Am I missing a post?
I just thought I’d mention I clearly feel the ‘Not wanted’ vibe, but I absolutely expected it so it’s OK. Cliques often resent outsiders and their opinions and I get that. I still enjoy reading here regardless of the negative stuff.
Anyway, I found a couple other Scorpio boards and shared the link to this page on them. Lots of women post there about Scorpio men and lots of Scorpios respond. Hopefully some will come and join in here so you can all get some opinions from other Scorpios. 🙂
Have a great weekend.
Hi Phoenix,
Gosh darn it phoenix! Ya mean more eagles will be landing???
Geeezussss!
One of the pictures that I tried to post the link to, was of a bunch of eagles in Alaska. They were landing (around 20 or more it felt like) and congregating near some water –
My idea was that the forum was feeling like that.
The other picture that I tried to put the link to was of a cat and and eagle. Well,perhaps if you google cat and eagle, you could find it.
The post could not be posted – so I had to take the links out. Perhaps there is something I do not know.
Oh well, what the heck –
Maybe I will have to transform and transcend myself to a lioness, just to keep up.
meowwwwwrrrrrrrroooaaaarrrr!
Hi Phoenix,
From some of your comments, it appears that you are responding on the “surface”, without soulful connection.
So, your truth may be there, but you have not given voice to it.
However, your choice of action in dealing with an “attack”, speaks for itself. Just P.Puppy´s form of attack.
You seem to know why he is all scorpio on you, but he, in his “oooohhhh so soft way”, is asking you to do the same with you.
With out being a Scorpio meeself – what P.Puppy calls manipulation, is actually a necessity to journey further in the abyss, for the both of you.
Due to the true lack of compassion apparently shown between the two of you, and the fact that he passed the next move to you, and of course – this virtual environment, it “seems” that is could not happen.
However, every thing done, should be done soulfully. Even these posts. (uhhh since I am a cat, different standards apply – right? We can´t all be intense black holes of conciseness and intensity – I need more posting space Eagles!!! )
Due to the fact that we, the forum, are waiting for your truth…the conversation will be over, until you proceed with it.
We all understand – but the ethics of this forum obligate everyone to “take their panties and gotchies off”.
Also,
We are all used to P.Puppy and his way of expressing his truth – and we have grown to love him it.
But it may come across as a “little” harsh.
Maybe we can get a smile out of him once in a while – I am sure I have gotten a few upward “twitches”.
Again, all of us in this forum are fighting the war – and winning those little battles on the way.
Hi again Pheonix,
Well, in order to continue with this idea, from the experiences that I have been through.
You seem to be fully aware of your perception of P.Puppy´s experiences with female scorpios, but you have not done anything in order to “move this mountain”.
Instead, you scornfully “feel sorry for him”…
Am I the only chick thinking “duuuhhhh – what is that???”
With all of the wonderful knowledge (about the nature of someone´s pain) and energy that you possess – what are you doing with it?
The fork in the road of scorpionic choice – for you. And the choice was “pity” (no one believes that one)
We (and P.Puppy) can not be compassionate to a big question mark of insincere nothing.
And therefore, we begin to know …. a bit of what you are (not), by the choices that you did not make, and by the choices (and “actions” contained in your language) that you did.
Again, there are no right or wrong answers, as we are all aware that growth is not easy. But you will not get it served with a cherry on top, because we all know what it takes to do it.
I personally, am interesting in hearing your truth. You clearly indicate that you comment when you feel you have something significant to say.
Truth is significant – but not easy.
Hi Gatubela,
Right of the bat I have to say that your first post made me giggle and smile because it sounded exactly like something my Leo girl friend would say! I love her to pieces and we spend hours talking about all things spiritual. 🙂
I think I understand everything you are asking, but I do believe a lot of my posts have been misunderstood, so I am taking the time to reflect on how best to phrase my answers. So please don’t think I’m ignoring your request for a reply! I just want to be sure when I do, it makes sense and hopefully will come across the way I want it to.
I will say one thing now though, I truly do feel sorry for PP, but it was indeed mixed with scorn, absolutely. I feel pity for any human being who is blinded by prejudice of any kind, but I do not believe there is ever justification for hating an entire group of people whether it is for race, religion or sun sign. However, though I pity them for having to live with that kind of negative feeling, when they refuse to acknowledge the irrationality of it or even admit they may be wrong, then I am scornful of that. Does that make me flawed? Perhaps, but I try to temper it with compassion and usually succeed. This time though I did not feel compassion, but you have to understand that my marriage is precious to me and I love my husband with all my heart and soul. So to have someone accuse me of lying to him, deceiving him and manipulating him was shocking, distasteful, unjustified, and more than a little bizarre. So yup, that attack brought out the negative Scorpio in me for sure, and I think most women, Scorpio or not, would react that way when someone insults the sanctity of their marriage. I hope this makes sense?
Anyway, I will write back more when I’m ready.
Thanks Gatubela and enjoy this beautiful weekend! 🙂
“… I love her to pieces and we spend hours talking about all things spiritual.”
Yeah… “talking about”
BEING spiritual is a concept beyond you.
More cowardly manipulation in a real-time example right here:
“… I will say one thing now though, I truly do feel sorry for PP…”
HEY. No one asked for your “sympathy” conniving coward.
“… I feel pity for any human being who is blinded by prejudice of any kind, but I do not believe there is ever justification for hating an entire group of people whether it is for race, religion or sun sign….”
No moron. You are feeling in my comments – JUSTICE… another very important Dimension of spirituality. The Source feels, beyond our tiny human ego, existance of Darkness.
Just look up into the night sky. That “Dark” is ‘in Response’ to your blind MOTIVATIONS “thought” (of Light ONLY) said in the above paragraph.
So if one has never conquered their wicked shadow, one REMAINS BLIND to WHAT their shadow IS.
And for that, I don’t “Pity” you, as you “think” you do me.
I feel for you. Which is why I have carefully chosen to express myself in this particular manner.
To be FULLY ALIVE and TO BE in-tune spiritually, we are to SHED LIGHT back INWARD of our Darkest… Darkest Shadow.
And the way to accomplish that?… is the way of our rawest, our bravest harvest of SELF-INTEGRITY we can find. This way is by virtue of SUFFERING IN DEATH and dismanteling our above-ground egotistical illusions and projections of what is “right” or “wrong”.;)
Hi Phoenix,
Hmmmm – you send me insincerity under the mask of “unicorn rainbow farts” with a cute little pink ribbon on top.
Premeditated comment writing, scorn, saying you are sorry, when you really are not, scorpionic negativity…your words, not mine.
You have used negativity and took advantage of a window of opportunity (p.puppy´s view of you – not your marriage actually), not to defend yourself, but to protect yourself, in order to create more negativity.
I (and the rest of the forum, I am sure) always see who people really are, when they are under duress. You being nice to me, won´t change my view of what you have already shown – when you don´t get your way.
Understand that your true intentions and character are in question.
I am asking you to resolve this conflict – if you decide that you actually give a REAL damn about your idea of self respect and dignity.
However, I would like to let you know – cutesie wutesie girlietudes, won´t solve this one.
And – due to the fact that my experiences have shown me most likely, you will not do this, but find someother way to “make a scandal” or “sugar manipulate” through some sort of “diversion”…
I wish you well.
Wishing you the truth – probably would cause some damage to your mental health.
I do care (as much as can be done here), but you have not returned my sincere “virtual” caring in kind.
Sorry Gatubela, there is no point in me saying anything more regarding this subject, especially since all the recent comments here are nothing more than juvenile, delusional rhetoric, not worthy of a reply.I am confident in who I am and where I am going, and don’t need anyone’s approval here. Can you say the same? It is an important question and well worth meditating on.
Your virtual caring is appreciated and my mental health is in excellent condition thanks, so please, by all means tell me whatever truth you wish to. However, I am not so certain of your mental health or any one else on this forum, but don’t worry, I’ll still feel free to share my opinions from time to time, just to keep this place real. My comments seem to have the happy knack of drawing out everyone else’s true motives and colours and that is enough for me. Yes that may sound harsh, but it is my perspective and it is no less valid than yours.
Opinions are merely that, the truth as one person sees it. Be careful of the thinly veiled scorn you’re showing Gatubela, and take care you do not ridicule others for their beliefs, because you risk crossing the line into fanaticism, and there you lose all credibility. You are the only person on the forum who has any left in my opinion and I hope you don’t throw it away.
Anyway, all of this I say in complete sincerity with how I feel about it, free of anger. I care about you too, and hope you will take a step back from here are really READ everything that has been written as if you were an outsider looking in. You might be quite disturbed at what you find.
Now, I’m off to enjoy this beautiful Sunday with my family. I hope you have a wonderful day as well. 🙂
“… Opinions are merely that, the truth as one person sees it…”
Ha. That’s it? That’s what Truth MEANS in your head?? Well of course it is. Another clueless LACK of Universal consciousness, LACK of Personal Consciousness, LACK of Heart and Soul Intelligence, and LACK of Fearless Introspection.
Plus, you have zero desire or inability to QUESTION ME about your inner life. Why? Because you are fearful. But Hey… don’t worry, you and 5 billion others follow mental suit. Many others would intially think ‘exactly the same of me’ as you have done, before I had RESPONDED to you on each occasion.
Life killing Fears contain a very predictable, utterly flat psychology in your being. Your fears control your conceptualized projections of reality, of what life means to you, which IS WHY you need to control the minds and emotions of others. You don’t know love. You know control, of others… excluding yourself.
If your INTENT HAD deep desires to relate, TO QUESTION, to teach and to share, I would not say what I have been saying.
I would treat your INDIVIDUALISM with the deepest love and respect.
That is because I would know you desire to know much more beyond the scope of your meaningful fears. Because you’d acknowledge that you have fears, and that there is nothing “wrong” with them.
If I were married for twenty years, I know for certain that I would be lost in fears by osmosis, in my social environment, my family rituals, my family habits and responsibilities… wasting away by the weak choices I made in what I read, of what I cajole and coerce out of other people, of what I FOLLOW in others, and not WHAT I EXPERIENCE in that reality.
I would basically be the guy slouched on the lounge ‘only talking about’ my life… yet afraid of EXPERIENCING such POWERFUL CHANGES in my reality. Our choices shape our egoistic bubble. A twenty year marriage would definetely extract my identity paper thin, it would shape my meaningless life into the culture of music, of movies, of money, of career image and pseudo-importance.
My self-esteem WOULD BE identified IN THAT ego bubble. My known concept of reality would feel the size of, well… a meager egg. I would be blissfully content in my fears and meaninglessness of the “things” around me.
I actually was there, and in that illusion of lies.
The diversions you paint, the deceptions you “think” are “rhetoric” by me and others here, appear in your superficial rationale language because you NEED that flat social approval from people to coddle your comfort zone. Yes, your comfort zones. In addition, the Soul (or eternity) has no relationship with your ego, so your ego (seen through your mind’s eye) dominates your “Opinions”… much like a POLITICIAN who dictates to everyone who WILL BUY INTO that ‘charasmatic reason’.. Hahaha.
Gosh, more “rhetoric” from me … you’ll have to excuse me.
It’s not that often I waste my time with a swim-individual who OFFERS nothing back with us, who TEACHES nothing back with us, who DENIES any self-fulfilling political supremecy, Ahemm!!… inadaquecy with us. A woman who MANUFACTURES her TRUTH and then BELIEVES in those LIES.
Naaa, your thoughts + language = YOU… therefore your political schemes are nothing cherished, nothing inspirational. Nothing but a reactional fear of evolving lies, much like that movie star intent to never look inward for the buried treasure, but to seek empty glory outward.
Your thoughts ‘point away’ from you each second. I see a million of “you’s” everyday.
Nihilism.;)
Justice is an Ego concept not a spiritual one. Simply put, the universe/collective conscious is not out to seek justice against anyone, it simply IS…ALL THAT IS, there is no good or bad, both are equally valid. Karma is also not a form of punishment but rather a learning tool for souls to choose new experiences in each physical existence to grow in new ways. It may seem like it is an eye for an eye if the murderer becomes the victim, but in reality, it is nothing more than the wisdom of the soul knowing it must experience both sides of the proverbial coin if it wants to move forward.
“No moron. You are feeling in my comments – JUSTICE… another very important Dimension of spirituality.”
WOW. Yeah…I call BS on this one too. I suppose that spirituality now also encompasses cheap shots and name calling? I think someone is making up the “rules” as they go along.
I’m a little disillusioned. There have been some very insightful comments on this forum…until recently. Best to take them all with a grain of salt I suppose. From an outsider’s point of view, there is a definite clique here and Phoenix is getting picked on.
There are people losing credibility here, but it’s not Phoenix.
Yeah TripleFire, her credibility is brave, vast and deep. Don’t you see how she questions life?
Thank you.
Now I See you;)
“… From an outsider’s point of view, there is a definite clique here and Phoenix is getting picked on…”
TripFire… if you knew anything, you’d realize that she started the game (in her head) on p.750 and 751.
You’d realize that words, our choice of expression mean something, and there is a very subtle context behind every intent.
Intent (Desire) drives this human-world. Us.
And now the gloves come off…
So this is a contest to see who can be the bravest, the deepest, and the most spiritual by way of eliminating the competition?
It’s so much easier to bask in your own self-impressed grandiose opinions once you’ve eliminated those who would disagree with you. You have, in effect, lifted your leg on this little corner of the internet, claiming it as your own.
Drink that Kool-Aid. I welcome your next scathing remark. I’m sure you can’t resist. I trust it will be REALLY deep and you will CAP every OTHER word for EMPHASIS.
I see you too, buddy. No winky face here.
Agreed. My intent here was to give you my true thoughts on the matter, not candy coat anything, and to be a total nasty sarcastic b*tch in the process. I hope that came across the way I intended.
I’m not your buddy.
Speak your idea of honesty to what you understand. Her.;)
I will speak my idea of honesty to whomever I please on this forum.
BUDDY.
Your idea of honesty does not interest me.
Nor are your true colors interesting by being a petulant little brat.
Not taking life seriously suits you fine. Join Facebook for that. Why continue being another hypocrite who doesn’t know herself from a bratty bag of pixie dust? (Rhetorical)
…and this forum is all about what is interesting to you personally. I forgot. I must have sniffed too much pixie dust again.
It’s pretty entertaining to watch you get worked into a lather. I think I may have just found my new favorite pastime…other than being a hypocritical brat.
I wonder if you’d be so brave in person? You probably live in your mother’s basement and pick your nose while you think your deep thoughts, but on THIS forum…you can be a GOD. I don’t buy it.
You’re completely full of yourself.
There we go. That’s the fine honesty/capacity I knew coming from you.
You can read my contributions (by choice) here and and still say that.
I could have kept them private.
Thank you, for all “your” honesty.
Good Night;)
Hi Phoenix and TripleFire –
Well – I guess it seems to be alright to provide beliefs, opinions and reality but not provide life experiences to collaborate. So, I hope that you understand that your beliefs are, still at the moment, without substance with me, like a hamburger without the patty.
You already know that hearing the “END” result of your battles, is much akin to reading the last page of a book, but not really reading it completely at all.
The whole community knows what I am about – but with you I know the what – but I do not know the why or the how. So, I look at the VERBS. Your insistence of not sharing this, but offering “grains” of REAL reality is intriguing.
Everyone who has experienced Scorpionic energy, knows this as well.
For example – your opinion of Karma and Justice. You are pronouncing your belief, but add nothing else.
This is a trend that I have seen in your comments.
This is what I meant for asking your truth.
No – Justice is not an EGO concept from my experiences. But perhaps it may seem like it when EGO tries to find the definition of Justice.
One is an active concept (justice) and the other is a “passive” concept (karma).
Did I seek justice for my terrible circumstances? No.
But the scales can be tipped according to how one handles themselves in the abyss and the seeds they plant there.
They involve the great forces of creation and destruction – if one manages to purify themselves (under the universal collective).
So, yes, in my experience, the universal collective CAN and WILL tip those scales.
Not because it seeks it itself, but because the seeker has surrendered to its energy.
As I have said before, one must “pay” the toll in order to be allowed passage – through Pluto´s gates.
Name calling, is something that I do not agree upon. But I have seen you and how you react to “negativity”. Contrasting it to my understanding of Scorpionic energy and my limitted understanding (I hate assuming) of your beliefs, but without the subsequent (RE)ACTIONs witnessed in your comments to back you up, it seems that if you are able to perceive the universal collective, why respond and insist with scorn, negativity, impatience and Pity?
Scorn could be your perception of things, or my fanaticism – but since I am willing to be open and share the WHY – perhaps we could reach an understanding.
Since you do not give me the WHY of your beliefs, this has been a one sided “virtual” exchange, but perhaps with a bit of goodwill established.
Hi Gatubela,
Well, I do not hold that every belief we have must come from a painful or traumatic experience which is what I’m sensing you believe (I may well be wrong here, and like you am making some assumptions). There is much inherent knowledge we are simply born knowing and comes from the collective conscious that we can tap into any time we chose in a myriad of ways, and it doesn’t have to be Scorpionic in nature to be valid. There are universal truths our souls simply know, and our human Ego interprets the best it can, which gives rise to our Ego beliefs, including our spiritual beliefs.
Experiences in our physical existence serve to either reinforce or weaken these beliefs, but don’t always cause them. More importantly though is the reality that beliefs and attitudes absolutely do colour our experiences no matter how carefully we try to eliminate biases. If someone believes the world is evil, then they will never see any good. They will only accept those experiences that reinforce their belief and prove the world is evil. They will reject any experiences to the contrary and write them off as lies and deceptions to justify their stance and feel safe. This is why truth is such a subjective thing in my opinion. My truth will not be your truth because we are on different Karmic , or “soul learning” paths, but both are equally valid.
When discussing spirituality, there is no way any of us can PROVE one person is wrong and another right, and nor should we try. We can only BELIEVE and hopefully exercise tolerance for others who may disagree with our interpretations. Ultimately there is only one universal truth, but for now, nobody can say for certain what it is.
Anyway, often we believe things because we simply feel them; they ring true on a soul level, but do not have collaborating life experiences and cannot easily be articulated into human language. Dreams are a great example of what the true nature of reality and soul consciousness likely is. In dreams there is no concept of time, little to no ego, and language is unnecessary, but the knowledge and messages received are often undeniably profound and transforming. Again, these are valid experiences but I’m not sure you will agree.
I still maintain that justice is in no way spiritual and karma is not a punishment tool, but to ask for proof in the way of direct experience isn’t useful in my mind, because again, it is something I ‘believe’ because it ‘feels’ right to me on a ‘soul’ level, and I interpret my life events accordingly. You ‘feel’,‘believe’ and interpret it differently, and I respect that even though I disagree, but that’s ok right? It doesn’t mean we can’t be civil and friendly. I offer my views and you offer yours, we weigh them and either accept or reject based on our beliefs/biases, and that’s it. It’s not a contest to see who has the better theory, it’s simply a dialogue, and that is a positive thing.
Now why do I believe that Justice is not spiritual? Well, for me the Universe and our soul purpose is all about love and creation, not pain and retribution. Like I said before, my definition of the collective conscious or universe is that it is ALL THAT IS, and so the human concepts of right, wrong, moral, immoral, justice, retribution etc., simply cannot exist, because the universe is impartial by its very nature. What one person sees as punishment I see as a challenge or opportunity, and the choice is entirely mine with respect to how I overcome it, or not. The tipping of the scales as you call it is what I take as an ingeniously designed opportunity to learn and grow (or not), depending on how I choose to deal with it. These catalysts can come from many sources, karmic, manifested by ourselves subconsciously, or otherwise, but never with the intention to punish.
Again, there is no right or wrong answer, as you said before. Perhaps many of our beliefs are the same, we just interpret and articulate them differently. If not, well diversity is always a good thing too. 🙂
Hi Phoenix,
“You ‘feel’,‘believe’ and interpret it differently…”
Being a fanatic, for me, is when someone “preaches” on faith, but not on Deeds.
So – it must also apply to my reality. They do not stay as beliefs. They become just as real as sitting down and having a cup of coffee. My growth must manifest itself in this reality and not stay in the abyss. Otherwise it stays as knowledge.
So yes, I will – and have, jumped off that cliff to the unknown – where my beliefs have turned into validated experiences.
Justice, for me, is a term used once there is a conflict established between cosmic law and “this” one. It is spiritual for me because of the very nature of divine feminine and masculine energies.
It will be inevitable, if one soulfully searches for GOD. Karmic forces will become involved in this one, and even the universe will support you.
Soulfully searching for GOD will take you on the road of HADES that P.Puppy talks about.
If we apply justice under any other context, without doing this, it is as you say it is.
Therefore, the idea is…
We project and manifest what is “up there”
And bring it all “down here”.
The form of doing this – is VERY ACTIVE.
This is why my beliefs don´t stay beliefs for long. They become VERBS, and how I do things. This is what I am searching for in your comments. Otherwise, it does seem like “unicorn rainbow farts”.
Negative experiences are not required. You are right – I do not advocate that.
What is required, in my experiences, is searching for GOD.
hmmm…personally, I’m in the middle of some deep inward searching and would of preferred maintain my silence. but I do have some past experience that I could share which would serve as a mirror to reflect our own unawareness and have a sense of self-truth. I would like to share with you my experience with the mob. When I say mob I do not mean a group of people, it’s irrelevant. the mob is our own mentality of giving up an identity and fade into the mindlessness of the “mass” to achieve an “agenda”.
I have encountered hundreds if not thousand of them, they jump in strikingly similar, by way of their preferred high horse, representing groups/someone else’s behalf, to fulfill a very personal agenda. they have excitement points, usually words, actions that can be easily seen as ” out the social order”, yes, mobs do not walk on borderlines, they would never want to be ethically challenged, so they would always feel “safe” to join in the action on the obvious to deliver the attack. They usually feel stronger when they have back up, and if not they calls for back up, they join forces, yet they do not give a damn about each other, you do not see interactive constructive comments between the mob itself. all communication are pointing outwards for the attack, they are incapable of giving each other constructive suggestions, because that would suggest to enter “individualism”, to which they mutually respect eachother’s secret agendas becasue they would never invite anyone to have the opportunity to question their own, they do not care about each other at all. The mob’s language is a negative sounding board consist of only attack of the given and denial of anything else, meaning they will not input anything new to the “attack”, they need to stay within the “obvious” to feel safe in their righteousness, becasue to step outside the “attack” zone means to fell off the high horse, so you read the first couple sentence you will know what the rest of the words will be like, I usually don’t read pass what they offer me to identify them as a mob. once I identify a mob, I totally lose interest, I can predict their every move before they know it themselves, what they don’t realize is once you become a mob, you no longer offer any originality, inspiration, individualism, creativity, insight. you are a mob, and they are the same everywhere and very predictable. They feel strong in the ethics of the social order, they come under its umbrella and borrow all of their arsenals from such social order, yet they will be inwardly furious if they do not get their personal glory, yes, it’s quite comical, if you gave-in, but not to the mob personally, but to the ethic itself, they will be so lost and secretly furious, and if you gave the glory to an individual within a group of them and made it elaborate, they will very quickly turn on eachother, because the one mob that get’s the glory will immediately trying to be your friend again, they don’t care about truth, they care about their own agenda. In my dark years I get so bored with the mobs I sometimes do these experiments on them and they hold little secret from me, I know them too well. yet all these knowledge came from my ego without a real connection to the soul, I am not proud of them, I see them as my dark dark years, I offer them and share them to spare the mobs the embarrassment to perform it out. so, read what I say and reflect.
I feel so very distant and cold from the human nature of finding the vile excitement/satisfaction in burning the witches.
It is indeed worth reflecting on, and I hope you take everything you just wrote and apply it to yourself first. Perhaps then you will finally begin to see the biases you’ve been clinging to and be able to look at all sides objectively.
Describe what your own contribution to this has been, before pointing fingers, and then you will begin to have some credibility.
No anger or resentment in what I say, merely my thoughts.
Seems like we have a different kind “witch hunt” expressed in your comments.
Please continue pronouncing your judgements, opinions and thoughts…without the corresponding “deeds” and “results” oriented to the very words you preach (compassion, peace, collective consciousness and karma)
Wow, just wow. Unbelievable. Nobody questioned TripleFire’s sincerity until today, and then bam, the moment she has a dissenting opinion, you all attack. Full on or thinly veiled, same thing and it’s completely unjustified, as usual.
Honesty? Sincerity? I’ve seen none tonight apart from TripleFire’s, and she is absolutely spot on.
Heads up people, Delusions of Grandeur occur when the sufferer does not have insight into his loss of touch with reality. If you can’t see that, well then yeah…enjoy the Kool-Aid.
I guess you are also including me in your comment.
I did not attack her, I included her , as a way of respect, in my comment to you.
Someone who had learnt the lessons to be learnt from “Delusions of Grandeur” (certainly enough to pronounce judgement) would see that.
Your definition of (whose) REALITY – would be appreciated here.
After 3 years on the forum I’ve said enough.
I’m gone for good.
Thanks everyone. Peace;)
It has taken me longer than my usual posting time to respond to you.
*sniffle*
sigh… this is a very sad day indeed.
hey…
pluto puppy.. i was away for a bit and just read up.. far out brussel sprout. please dont go. but i understand if you need to, you have been under intense attack. and you know… the fucked up thing is that i know that what you said way back in response to jojo’s post, i think it was 749.. was said with her ( and her) higher purpose in mind. meaning its fucked up and so sad that it was not seen in that light , you actually were caring for her by giving her some boundaries.that the person who attacked you didnt see where it was coming from.and also completely misunderstood the comment you made about clubbing scorpios- as i saw it was a self effacing comment , coming from humility but it was so misconstrued.i can see why that would hurt ..i would be pretty upset too if i was attacked like you have been. and add to that people talking about you like you arent here. pretty damn patronising and rude.
i know you can stick up for yourself but i do care about you and you have been incredibly giving of your time and thoughts and feelings and it makes me so sad that you have been hurt .i will miss you.x
This whole forum would make a great bedtime book. I’ve just started seeing a scorpio, and honestly don’t really know if I can be bothered with men in general. If he wants to be with me, then he can do all the work and I’ll keep my steel wall up for once:)
Hi Kiwimum,
Well Hello!!!
Can you tell us more?
Why the steel wall?
I see the viciousness has started… I don’t actually read anything the mobs wrote, I know of what they will write, mobs hold no mystery to me, the inhuman robots of surgically sewed on plastic smile, or the more natural pure maliciousness, I’ve seen it all. I’ve hoped to spare this development of mob-ism as I’ve seen the attack usually starts when the person under attack loses his/her cool and start to self-defend, like the way bullies will keep on poking the kid until he fights back, then they attack. No, as I can see my sharing of their identity has started the process sooner. well, the mob has to run its course and there is no stopping them, it’s disgusting to me to see this part of human nature, that’s why they are mobs, they are on the mission to burn the witches, communication and relating, are you kidding?
Hi JoJo,
I have also seen the mob – actually – a group of 8 of them tried to put me jail just last month (and they tried to kidnap my kid, take my children away, threaten the judges, my lawyers – as you indicate, the list can go on and on.
You see it alot in the armed forces as well.
You need alot of strength in order to get out of it, or you will be dragged down. (or in my case – killed)
I feel that only time will establish the truth of your final sentence, but I do not (and would not) assume to know the motives of the other contributers here in this forum.
However, I will make MY intentions known.
I would like to understand – and despite anyone´s assumptions of what is REALLY going on, I have not lost track of that.
BTW JoJo,
Hi again JoJo,
Perhaps I may be jumping the gun here, but in my experience, what is happening here is not “mob” behavior, by the very fact that there is alot of CHOICE here and the CONSEQUENCES of not complying, are not DIRE.
The person under attack in a MOB setting, does not have that.
Gatubela,
To me MOB is a mentality, a very real part of human nature, WE ALL can fall into it at some point of our lives, in fact before I became aware of it, I myself actively participate in the MOB not by vivacious involvement, but by way of laughing at the victim’s expense, I was the on-looker who have no idea what was really going on: the slaughter of a real human being emotionally, intellectually, even physically as in your case. I was part of the crowed. It had actually happened when we were discussing a TV series and we were making fun of the directors and actors. My awareness came when the same director made another series a couple years later and I recognized the beauty in it and wanted to share my feelings about it, yet to my surprise I saw the “people” were ridiculing it in the most bazaar way, there are no substance in any of their claim yet they keep the laugh and attack going with so many people joining in on the laugh. At that time the butcher and his friends were protecting the director and actors in that mob, yet he didn’t engage in the mob’s logic, he engaged in the mob’s motivation/blindness/ malicious intention/personal agenda. I was so shocked by the truth I sensed from his comment and was soaked in cold sweat, literally. I read all of his past post and traced back years of what was going on in the public mob behavior and I was so shocked by the slaughter that was going on and I was totally blind to and even laughed at, this is the start of which I engaged in fighting the mobs. Since then I have learned so much about this part of human nature, it can be between two people, a group of people, a real sense mob, it can happen between nations. It is a mental state, which you enter, you lose all your humanity and become a crusader. it’s the seed of wars. It’s scary and cold to watch, and personally disgust me to no end.
You see, the mob is incapable to see the truth, they have no sympathy for other’s because they have no self-love, their personal pain and their well being is what they are afraid to face, so any indication of truth to point to that pain behind that plaster smile they feel a overwhelm need to annihilate.
You see, if you have an ounce of real self-love and real confidence, you will know no matter what puppy calls “female Scorpios” are, there are very clear indications to what he feel the behavior that warrens for that clubbing, it’s always there and never hidden, there is no confusion as to what “female Scorpio” is to him, so if you know whatever behavior he said is not who you are, you will feel no threat toward yourself, only the part that does have truth to it make you feel PAIN, as I have shared earlier on my journey. As when I say mob, I tell you exactly what I see in MOBS, and that ticket to their truth trigger them like fire in their hair. I do no like what I can do to them, everyone is human, but I’ve made a contentious choice to not to look away, I know in the real world I’m afraid of the mobs who can physically harm and been doing so for eternity, but in the realm of minds, I’d be damned it I be afraid to say it to their face who they really are. and since I’ve found the path and shared the path of facing our own pain, I no longer feel like the butcher in doing so. as I know, the point of them start to be human again, is the point of facing incredible pain, facing their own death. To which, I’m here to share that pain with them as I shared with them mine. we are all human, but there are times humanness IS NOT an excuse to slaughter.
Hi JoJo,
I understand you now –
I guess I feel that I can only respond or contribute based on my experiences of things. So, thank you for sharing yours. Maybe I am a bit dense, but most normal behaviors really go over my head. I usually am the one who did not get the joke.
And when I tell one, everyone just does not understand me.
So if I said it – I did it!!! (Or went through it)
Perhaps it is my blind spot – but it is also my way of not being hypocritical to myself and not (intentionally) harming others. I am definitely not a powerful force in Nature.
I may need a bit of “clubbing” meeself with comments such as yours to get the real view of the situation.
To tell you the truth, I did not see the Mob behavior. I recognized that something was up, but due to the fact that I do not “have” those behaviors, I felt completely lost. So, I wanted to know – NOW. I just wanted to understand our new guest under her (plutonic) light and concepts of the theme (title) of this forum.
I feel you, up until less than two month ago I was in so much confusion and pain, less than one month ago I was in so much confusion and pain, less than two weeks ago , I was in so much confusion and pain. The journey only started very shortly for me, so, I feel you. that’s why even when I recognized the mob “behavior”, I will try to communicate first, because sometime people are just unaware, in fact I was clinical blind. they only confirm their mob identity to me by way of how they respond to my attempt to relate/communicate to them.
A giant warm smile heading your way.
Hi JoJo…
The sun just came out of the sky and warmed up my day.
One quick question. I am truly curious JoJo and Gatubela, why you can’t see a double standard here.
Double Standard: any code or set of principles containing different provisions for one group of people than for another.
– So, I ask you both, why is it ok and justified for Pluto Puppy to get nasty with people, but when someone dishes it back to him, that person is unjustified? Why not call out his actions into question and hold them to the same standard as others? Again, this absolutely speaks to credibility.
Hi Phoenix,
I can only observe a person´s behavior – and try my best not to put an adjective on it, until I reach REAL comunication.
But to answer your question, because the very solution to any conflict I would have, would not lie in the alternatives that you are mentioning. The alternatives that you offer indicate your way of handling things and your perceptions. They are not REAL solutions to the problems in “this world”.
This morning, when I jogged to work, I came across other joggers. We actually paused and greeted eachother…and continued on. We don´t interfere with the concentration of the jog – the meditation that it takes, and the goal of the day. You even know where they are in their jog. If they are struggling, you help them out. If you are struggling, they help you out.
It is because I recognize a fellow soul searcher and the kind of “jog” he is on – when I see one.
It´s all thumbs up.
P.Puppy and I have had our tiffies – but we have resolved them through our INDIVIDUAL HARD EARNED TRUTHES and honesty of WHAT was REALLY going on through our perception of what it means to be soulfully true to yourself.
In order to do this, you need to very honest with yourself. An example is of JoJo´s truth.
Meaning – the thoughts you think must be the ones on “paper”.
The analysis of these thoughts, as JoJo did, makes you see certain things.
Then your mind expands due to the RELEASE of energetic BONDS -or KARMA.
So, what we REALLY saw, was KARMA being released.
Ah – SWEET FREEDOM!!!
P.Puppy´s form of speaking, indicates that he has done this many times. Scorpionic energy, being truthfully faced, is no small feat. But it is an indication of the lessons that he is learning. Since he is “ON THAT PATH”, he has my total support and POSITVE energy.
To witness Divinity – is to RESPECT the PROCESS.
NO double Standard.
Just the angels singing.
hmm, I smell the classical mob black white question going on. Yes, the mob always ask this question: how come only the producers have rights, don’t the audiences have rights too? yes, you see the mob will never admit they have no stand, they have a PERSONAL agenda, they will try to make a twisted bag of lies appear to be a legitimate point of view, they have no point of view at all, becasue they have no substance in their motives, they are willing to bend a situation anyway they like to suit their response of the moment. If it’s a legitimate stand they are trying to COMMUNICATE, you will see the color, shape, substance of that stand, in fact, you see nothing behind them. they will try to claim the identity of the audience, they don’t even know what a real audience is, they are mobs. If they don’t recognize this in themselves, they stuck in that mob identity forever. it will just be a mob in waiting for the moment and trigger to act out the mob in them.
oh, that’s why they hide behind the social call or ethics and afraid to step out it, becasue they have nothing real to attach that hidden personal agenda to.
Ah well, we’ll have to agree to disagree on this point. If you can’t see how your own words can equally apply to yourselves, then nothing I say will change your mind.
Peace 🙂
I’m a pisces woman and was seeing an aries man, and I let my guard down and fell for him hard. He’s a bit of a wonderer and being the true pisces that I’am I let him go with dignity. Then I just recently met a scorpio man and just don’t want to let the same thing happen. Unfortunately after only seeing him for a couple of days I ended up doing what I shouldn’t have done…slept with him. He did text the next day but I just don’t want to let myself get too emotionally involved. Today is the 5th day since meeting him and I haven’t text him nor has he text me. I’m on nz time so it’s only 1 p.m. here. I just don’t want to give in.
Hi kiwimum,
The emotional and spiritual connetion between Scorpio and Pisces can be very strong, no matter what the nature of the relationship is. Did you feel that with this man?
So in other words, maybe I’ve come to the conclusion that perhaps all men are EGGS no matter what sign they are:) Nah, I know they all aren’t like that but I seem to attract them..lol
Hi Kiwimum –
What is nz time? I realize that there is a huge time difference.
Are you a mom as well?
“I just don´t want to give in.”
If you feel a bit worried, then gently listen to yourself.
“Giving in” is a strange concept to feel – and a strange justification to “end it”. Unless he has given indications to you that he is no longer interested?
Putting the existance of this man aside for a moment…
What are you afraid of?
Hi Everyone,
Here is a song, that when I hear it, I think of Scorpionic energy – and what P.Puppy was all about.
You can hear it on You Tube – just search for “Carlos Varela” and “Una Palabra”
Cheers P.Puppy – and I hope that you come back.
Here is the English translation:
One word says nothing
And at the same time it hides everything
Like the winds which hide the rains
Like the flowers which hide the mud.
A glance says nothing
And at the same time says everything
Like the rain on your face
Or an old treasure map.
Like the rain on your face
Or an old treasure map.
A truth says nothing
And at the same time it hides everything
Like a bonfire that won’t go out
Like a stone that is born dust.
If one day I don’t have you, I will be nothing
And at the same time I will be everything
Because in your eyes are my wings
and the shore where I drown.
Because in your eyes are my wings
and the shore where I drown.
Here are the Spanish lyrics
Una palabra no dice nada
y al mismo tiempo lo esconde todo
igual que el viento que esconde el agua
como las flores que esconde el lodo.
Una mirada no dice nada
y al mismo tiempo lo dice todo
como la lluvia sobre tu cara
o el viejo mapa de algún tesoro.
Una verdad no dice nada
y al mismo tiempo lo esconde todo
como una hoguera que no se apaga
como una piedra que nace polvo.
Si un día me faltas no seré nada
y al mismo tiempo lo seré todo
porque en tus ojos están mis alas
y está la orilla donde me ahogo,
porque en tus ojos están mis alas
y está la orilla donde me ahogo.
Don’t worry Gatubela, I predict he’ll be back before too long.
Have a beautiful day. 🙂
Saw the mob’s short comment, unavoidable, hey, nothing new here, I predict the mob will hang around for their personal glory, yes, it’s impossible for the mob to swallow someone else’s last word, you see, it’s all about “image” to them, the righteous high horse rider, disgusts me to no end. of course this is a very subjective feeling, yes, very subjective, deep disgust, hard earned by years of trying to reach out to the mob but
meet with nothing but the viciousness and plastic-ness, not unlike what Gatubela is doing now, oh, I shutter with that disgusting image of the mob. I’m sure puppy’s disgust to the female Scorpios is EARNED in a similar way. Mobs don’t earn anything, they just want steal the fruit hiding behind their high horses, you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all. Well, the mob shall exist, the fact of life.
oh, the prediction thing reminds me of the butcher, he loves to predict the mob, I didn’t know why, now I know, and I offer you my honest motivation: either I get rid of what’s disgust me, or the mob will come back to prove me right. This my dear mob, is the win win situation of being honest, which you are incapable of getting through your mob head. and before you get on the high horse of “but I wasn’t the one who hurt you in the first place”, let me predict your predictable-ness and give you the clubbing beforehand: because you are a mob, you are a mob before this point of time, and if you don’t face it, you will be mob after this point of time, and before you have the fortune to meet a mob-slayer, yes, thank you very much, that is me *peace*, you are the slaughter of countless victims, you abuse them emotionally, psychologically, and intellectually. and that crime you’ve committed against other human beings, is reason enough for the clubbing you are receiving here today, from me personally, the self appointed mob-slayer.
major V peace V
Hi Jojo,
Oh – since I have been exposed to a Mob, I guess we can predict…hmmmmm –
The GOAL: TO isolate you from ANYONE and EVERYONE who could actually let you slip out of their hidden AGENDA (control based).
They want you ALONE, nicely humiliated and BEGGING.
1. Mob will try to be nice, but really wants you to give them what they truly want. Behind your back, they have already told EVERYONE you know in the comunity, what an terrible person you are. They have done this before you even HEAR from them. By the time that you do, their WEB of lies has already been set.
2. They will start with “tough talk”
3. They will not follow any rules of civil conduct – actually, these rules are meant to be broken because it is all “your” fault.
4. Inflated EGOs, where they think that they are superior – seeming manic depressive behavior.
5. When they realize that they won´t get what they want, they will try to “establish” a Team of supporters, who are in fact, just as mob centered as they are.
6. They will say that they are the victims –
7. What they accuse you of, means that they did it first.
8. But in the end, they are not REALLY committed to what they are fighting for – once the truth comes out and everyone who was fooled by them, feels disillusionment.
DON´T get me started – yeah – it happened to me too.
The bad thing is when they decide to be honest with their “mobbiness”, and use their incredible sense of “bla bla bla”, to other people, while playing the fine line of “credibility”.
Meaning that they are EXPERTS at what is CREDIBLE, and this rather GREY area that people have, in not trying to INVESTIGATE further. They will offer to help or give- when people are vulnerable, to help that person, in exchange for “support”.
They work on the FEELINGS of people, and when they see a bit of (negative) reaction, they crescendo it and try to EVOKE a negative response IN THEIR FAVOUR, instead of directly RESOLVING a conflict.
If none of this works, intimidation, posturing, theatric behavior is forth coming.
Meaning – in my case, they will get out the “violent behavior”, because the other person made them do it.
All of a sudden, they have no capacity…as they have been the victims of everything.
Well, those are my experiences –
A big warm squeeze hug heading your way, this confirms my resolve to maintain a mob slayer at least in the realm of minds. I respect your strength in reality in facing them face to face, and I hope this experience teach us never to become the mob to others. peace.
It’s been a busy yet empty silence, lots of awareness goes on from the descend of awareness itself, yet that primal connection between emotions and awareness-of-that-emotion is missing. It’s a new UNKNOWN to me from the now familiar path of leaning. all I can do is listen intently despite the chaos of interaction, and find absolute stillness within. then it came.
The path of emotions had showed me patterns in everything I’ve experienced, the pattern of balance, now the pattern of finding self. The nature of finding the out-ward, means finding “the insecurity of relating” via the indicator of pain, to finding the in-ward, meaning the absence of pain to find “confidence the self-worth”. This also holds to true to the path of descend: going deeper by experiencing the out-ward emotions: anger, hurt, fear…emotions with connections to others, only through these emotions you become aware of the existence of Cosmo truth, only then, you are able to detect the in-ward emotions: guilt, shame, emotion that point to the self. shame is the inability to process guilt, therefore the guilt become shame that question our self-worth, the out-ward death are often induced by shame. so essentially, the only in-ward emotion that points to the self is GUILT.
In my awareness in connection with the emotion of guilt, I’ve found there are three kind of guilt I experienced: the guilt of act, the guilt of choice, and the guilt of consciousness. The guilt of act is something like this “I’ve made an un-self-aware decision that had hurt people, I will never make a decision without knowing what I truly want.” this kind of guilt motivate me to act to right a wrong. It’s very common and easy to detect. The second kind of guilt “guilt of choice” is much harder to detect, it often shows up wrapped in something else, it showed up in me wrapping that guilt in expressing gratitude to the Scorpio men. yet the undetected emotion of guilt is a result of a choice of “I’m moving on on my own”. a choice that I had no intention to change yet. so this guilt showed up as “gratitude”. It’s the most dangerous kind of guilt, because when unaware, it twist truth to try to get the instant fix to get ride of that guilt. In the case of my gratitude, I twist the truth of “no one is accountable to inherit the brutality of our emotions”, and “we as a creature of relating is responsible for eachother’s well being”, and ” everyone on the face of earth is looking for THE ONE”, you then can see the pattern of which all my twisted lies points to: that the women (this is to hide the self in that broadness of that definition) is not responsible for the well being of the Scorpio men. This is clearly a lie in retrospect, and that the lie is delivered in the form of ego boosts. In observance of this behavior in the self, using the self-universal-other refection method, you realize this kind of guilt in humanity is the birth place for schools, laws, religion, government. In light of the rightfulness of existence, you realize a choice in essence is taking a stand for one purpose, and neglecting responsibility in other purpose. for example if a mother stays home for the children, she is neglecting the path of self development, if she decided to work, she is neglecting the care of the children. This inevitability of consequences of choices lead to the universal agreement in society to delegate responsibilities to “institutions” as a solution to that guilt. yet when unaware on a personal level, you see the working mother twist the truth of guilt by becoming obsessed with her child’s school performance, and the home mother twist the truth of guilt by degrading the importance of self-development and boost the ego of motherhood. This GUILT OF CHOICE is the most dangerous of guilt. In the mop, it’s their elaborate praise and expectation they put on their subject of admiration, that of a society figure, that of a husband/wife. and the society as a whole often acts as a mob in our reaction to heroes and villains, we de-humanize them.
In the example of Dalai Lama, god is teaching us through our honest emotions, and god is SHOWING us truth through people’s honest emotions. emotions speak truth because people are unaware this fact and often ATTEMPT to find truth trough deeds and words. Through emotion you know Dalai is a hypocrite by his thirst for public approval, his happiness in his praise. yes, this is the truth, but what dose truth tell us? what do we do with truth? the mob minds of society cannot stand the word hypocrite, yet the truth behind that hypocrisy is: this is a man, since birth, has been put under the expectation of man-kind to kill his self-awareness and live for the “greater-goods”, instead of god teaching us the true self-sacrifice by giving us intense emotions, this is man’s way of trying to be god: by our expectations we put on other human beings. Here is a man who hasn’t made one single conscious choice to be an independent human being like everyone else, the thought of the life Dalai or his liking must have lived to become who he is today put tears to my eyes. we only acquire the ability to LOVE through our acceptance of truth. We must fact our motivations and emotions to acquire the ability to recognized people’s deeds, and love him/her for who he/she is and who he/she is not.
This awareness of guilt of choice is the only way to lead you to the chamber of you utmost self inner core: the room of right and wrong, this is the birth place of choices, emotions, the birthplace of the eternal guilt. yes, by knowing the Cosmo acceptance of existence, you realize we live in constant guilt, becasue we constantly making choices that is on one hand right, on the other hand wrong. You then realize this chamber is the ultimate death of self, if you destroy this chamber of right and wrong, there will be no rebirth, what will happen is IMMORTALITY, you will no longer be a mortal, you will become the Cosmo acceptance of existence, the Cosmo, the Buddha. You will permanently destroy guilt, and any other emotions associate with the making a choice based on your inner core of right or wrong.
Facing this inner chamber of my mortality, I know without one single doubt that I DO NOT want to be immortal, I want to cherish the gift god gives me: a life to live, instead the chance of becoming him. I AM A WOMAN, I want jealousy, joy, desire, pain, peace, the wrenching feeling of a broken heart and the endless compassion of wanting to love and heal. yes, the richness of living.
I closed the door to my mortality, and made my first choice of total consciousness: to accept gods gift of richness of living, and realized this: the path of descent is awareness, the path of elevation is CHOICES. and the third kind of guilt: guilt of conciseness is my due to pay for my choices, I will bear them, the prudence of being a monster, and feel at home both in hell and heaven.
Ladies, ladies, ladies! My goodness JoJo and Gatubela, you two have WAY too much time on your hands! Seriously, how many hours and how much energy have you wasted on this today? I expected some kind of twisted way out response to my last question of course, but you have really outdone yourselves and it’s kinda pathetic really.
Listen, take a very deep breath, and look around. This is a comment section following a blog over three years old, and one that is nothing more than a rip off from Linda Goodman’s Sun Signs at that. Your time would be much better spent on real life, or at the very least, cultivating relationships with people who actually care about having your approval.
Mobs, slayers, butchers, slaughter victims, and monsters indeed…*chuckles* For heavens sake, this is an internet BLOG! The only casualties here today are the illustrations of your own characters and common sense. If you can’t bring yourselves to stop the the self-righteous pity party, and proselytizing with “woe is me” victim syndrome, well by all means continue, but at least take Pluto Puppy’s advice and be concise. That way he won’t have too much wade through when he comes back. 😉
Thought I better clarify ladies, the last bit was intended quite tongue in cheek. :p
Hi JoJo,
I chose DUTY over “immortality”.
As I have said before, if people REALLY knew the power of sexual energy…this world would be a better place to live in.
HEY. Hypocrite Coward FOOL.
You politicize this Now:
“… Mobs, slayers, butchers, slaughter victims, and monsters indeed…*chuckles* For heavens sake, this is an internet BLOG!…”
While you “cajoled” this intent then- P.751:
“… Gatubela, I truly enjoyed your story about the dog and cat, and many of the other things you’ve added here. You too JoJo. So girls, I hope you keep on writing whatever the heck you want to!…”
Use “your valuable time” on you know who.
Your soulless games sickens me.
————————-
Hey guys,
Please don’t ‘react’ to her in any way beyond this post.
She “Wants” that… And “that” is who she is. Nothing.;)
Hey welcome back Pluto. Long time no see! :p
Thank you Umm, that made me laugh. Love Pluto.;)
Although my Radar is tuned into a Sociopath who actually ‘believes’ that internet blogs don’t have real human beings connecting with other real human beings.
Pathological Liar uses her vast understanding of human beings proclaiming that we “Proselytize.”
Hm… “connecting”… a difficult concept for many, especially one.;)
Hi P.Puppy 🙂 🙂 🙂
Actually, I had to google that word – I guess too much time down here.
I only speak English in the forum and with my children, so sometimes I need a little help from Mr. Internet Webster.
You are welcome, it gave me a laugh too..
Pluto , yeh ..’connecting’ . agreed with what you said. to be able to see and feel an essence, beyond words and connect with that, i believe happens when one is detached from thoughts, ideas etc.. the mental plane.. all the stuff you have been explaining on here for a long time..
it is pure.
going to have some toast now. this body is hungry.
Hi Umm,
When I am feeling frustrated, I will admit that (only) sometimes I eat a bit of chocolate (ice cream) and watch a good movie…….
….while contemplating what the song said, of course.
I am still laughing!
wahh…says the woman busy finding the steel focus she pretend to have misplaced but really never had…a direct shot to the point.
Major V peace V
Hi Jojo,
I know that you are on an incredible journey, but I thought that this sentence was incredible.
“… you will become the Cosmo acceptance of existence, the Cosmo, the Buddha.”
In some cases, the option of choice -between good and bad – IS NOT AN OPTION available to you. (Saturnic conditions do not permit this)
Oh, what a divine luxery to have freedom of choice!
One, under extremely dire situations, can fully be aware of the choice in heaven or hell ACTIONS or REACTIONS, and feel that all of them will make you into a “monster”. Through elevating choices with the SOURCE, you can surrender what ever options you feel open to you (due to limitted perception really) – and FALL, blindfolded, into “what you are not”, in an attempt to respect the soul energy of all that are around you.
DUTY is the desire “to not cause harm” (and who am I to judge what exactly HARM is – since I am not GOD) and the subsequent surrender to the source – therefore mastering soulful daily activities through CREATIVE forces.
Choosing to not cause harm – activates COSMIC law, in your choices.
For example, one can choose to “whatever choice (VERB)I make unto others, I want to go through it to.” by choosing to go through the life experiences (karmic energies) of someone else as well, as to soulfully not cause any harm.
This equals TRUE Compassion.
Justice (balancing those scales) – is a very spiritual concept.
We are the total sum of our choices. Including choices whether forced, or choices by result of, act (deed), apathy (or Fear).
Our present mental states, our fluxing emotional/sexual psychology in ‘the Now’… our spiritual awareness or inversely our fear of ‘a Truth’ beyond people and energies we are shamed and guilty of “knowing”… especially ourselves… shape the “WHO (the heck) AM I” about us.
This colorful man-made culture… family, friends, peers, strangers, work environments, play environments, political and activist environments are some EXTERNAL INFLUENCES which have tremendous bearing on our inner perceptions and projections of “truth” and “reality”.
Sadly, the more I have personally and universally become what I AM… the more I see “the beliefs” of others “Nouns” communicated among one another to justify their lies incorporated into their deeds.
God is Energy. ‘Not just’ what we see past our nose (Nouns). Human beings – from our Birth… our very First Breath as babies out from the womb… beams the INNOCENCE of our “Divinity”. Just look deeply into the eyes of a month old baby and feel their magic. That divinity breathes “the image of God” out to us, and the world. Purity. FREE of influence by the harshness of culture……. YET.
It is when we little babies grow in our minds and bodies, developing a pregnant identity, cultivating an inner psychology, subtle but powerful feelings, assimilating, directing, attaching, filtering and digesting overloads of external perceptions and mirrored projections drilled into our heads and hearts by our external environments ‘telling us’ what all that STUFF… means.
The evolution of the ego as a teenager and into adulthood crystalizes, or stagnates. That inevitable stagnation of our ‘inner reality’ is a response to why people drink their sorrows away, go nutty on pills, divorce, get in deep debt, follow blind causes, follow corrupt individuals who lie, cheat, swindle, deceive (themselves).
Stagnation of inner-self buries our light. The atrocities of the human Underworld have not yet been ‘Exhumed’ for what it is. Because unearthing ones lies and self-fulfilling pain would mean the revelation of?… Death.
So it is when full grown adults manifest the nuances of ego-self that OUR INNOCENCE, since birth as babies… becomes Lost.
So the ‘way back’ into our innocence… by seeking and finding ‘the Child’ (the image of God) is to learn through the consequence of death of old perceptions and projections fed to us in youth, and the brave reflective awareness of our karma. Our life paradigm.
So no “Real” evolution (among other hearts and souls) can truthfully thrive and connect if one is blind of their true-self.
Finding true-self demands accepting personal pain and feeling negative energies. This idea is no different than Mother Earth “responding” to God (massive energy) by manner of earthquake, tsunami, firestorm, flood, drought, hurricane, tornado, monsoon, disease, famine, dust storm or cool ocean breeze.
Finding self-honesty means surviving our very personal Hurricane. Then Becoming someone much greater and purposeful through that process.
We can find that ‘little baby’ of virtue again, by Becoming within.;)
Ok I just picked out this chunk of info from a piece that I originally had shown on p.439.
“… In their gift of realising deception, rejecting hollowness and seeing through shallow facades, Scorpios are not afraid to expose realty for what it is; they are the emissaries of a more complete sense of truth than many of us are prepared to contemplate, the penetrating aspects of it often being too painfully sharp for comfort. The paradox of Scorpio is that when it is fooling you, it is not really acknowledging you at all.
Real communication with this sign means engaging with honesty, no matter how candid, sordid or direct. Cheat you it may that means nothing; when something really does matter Scorpio won’t be fooled and it won’t mess around with either pleasantries or mind games….”
I just wanted to reinforce the above ‘wise knowing’ does not apply with female Scorpios. Namely, each respective head-case. In my intense experiences with them I’m at least 0 for 47 in finding an authentic power-free honesty. I don’t excitingly want to bludgeon these gals socially. Lol… They just bring it upon themselves.
Gatubela,
On top of what everyone shared, I will share with you what I “see” while at my chamber of mortality. It’s more like a threshold of taking a path to become the Cosmo, the start point of that journey. Immortality has to be earned, years sometimes life time to destroy that chamber of “self”, it doesn’t happen with only awareness or “knowing” what immortality is, therefore it’s a choice becasue you have to first choose to walk on that path of immortality. And the difference between immortality and mortality that I “see” in a human existence in the same world is this. there will always be the Cosmo definition of right: to heal (love is a form of healing), and wrong: to harm (this is not be confused with hurt or causing pain). The Cosmo is the pure objectivity (chance oriented) of that truth, while the self is subjective (choice oriented) of that truth. To give you an example of the difference, the Buddha do not chose who to heal, he/she heal whomever comes into his/her path. while the human will chose to heal the people they “love” over anyone else. So the buddha walks into a battle filed he will help both sides at the same time, a human has loyalty and stand to fight on his/her choice. To the Buddha no one is special because everyone is special, to the human there are loved ones, family. To the buddah the word loyalty, family, sexual love, possession etc holds no meaning, therefore emotion related to such subjective concept do not exist, he/she experience no guilt because he/she react to things fate deliver to their path, while the mortal make choices to seek what he/she wants in life. to become the Cosmo the Buddha means to destroy the concept of subjectivity…The author of the book road less traveled said if he were to truly believe sex would be helping a patient he would have sex with her, although he is soulful married. This is a form of immortality. I don’t know if I’m making sense…
I don’t know, now that I’m no longer all detached emotionally to engage with the mob, I feel ill somehow, the encounter with the mob, and the dark memories…I feel I have an overwhelming need to meditate and cleanse. I think I will stay away a while…
Hi JoJo,
Yes, the Christ energy removes human choice and hands you over to fate. So, everything that you do, is related to this energy – being able to hold and sustain it, and then applying it.
The lessons are very “harsh” – but also very beautiful.
The problem is not the guilt – it is the contrast found through the KNOWING and what you will be giving up – the “seeming” sacrifice.
I hope that you heal well.
The Female Scorpio Anthem.
hey.. maybe you two could just forgive each other.cripeys.there is an obvious attraction. surrender to it. neither of you are going to win any other way.not in the long term .. its that or keep clubbing and running. until the next cycle begins. i guess thats just the way it is. can you handle that. i think you can.. and so it goes..
Hey umm,
No hard feelings at all on my end, which is why I didn’t wanna react to anything. 🙂 I also don’t feel clubbed in the least.
Actually, it’s kinda odd, but a male scorpio friend from my past reentered my life about 4 days ago, and I am really believing that nobody understands Scorpio like another Scorpio. Anyway, I know exactly what PP is saying and why, we just disagree. It’s all good. 🙂
Soulful knowing does not desire “disagreement”. Soulful knowing desires… Love. Union. Understanding. = Detachment.
Agree… Disagree… that cerebral, soulless reality, does Not desire Love, Union, Understanding.
Agree… Disagree reality… desires egotistical subjectivity = Control = Possession = Rigid Attachment (in head)… to “Convert” anyone… ahhhahaha the beauty of hypocrisy.
Agreement, disagreement… WANTS Separation.
Souful love WANTS connection with eternity of union. Because soul breathes with “Understanding”.
Understanding is not a noun. It is a verb.
‘Just’ (which means Justified) as love, union, energy, truth, integrity, sharing, understanding are verbs.
Nouns don’t ‘know’ verbs.
Verbs certainly ‘do know’ nouns.;)
“Verbs” need to be careful that they do not become so obsessed with action that they end up blind to the very thing they want most, the “nouns” they are acting towards. 😉
No. Acting is you. A living artifice. More baseless lies, deception of intent and “opinions” and still nothing to support you;)
And Umm, don’t add the adjective of attraction into to my perspectives. You enable her disgusting pretense, thanks.;)
Oh for heavens sake! If you read any pretense into my post, well that’s not my fault. Sheesh! I agree with you there is no attraction here, perhaps repulsion would be a better word, and likely we are in each other’s face for a reason. Yup, there are lesson’s here to be learned on both sides, and I’ll be Scorpio enough to admit it. 😉
No acting is not me, and I do not live in artifice. You saying something Pluto Puppy does not make it truth, and I am comfortable enough in my own skin to not need to prove that to you or anyone else. I also stand by what I said using the verb noun analogy, that what you crave most is connecting with people who truly understand you and have lived and breathed the same journey. It is the same with my Scorpio friends, we have the overwhelming need to FEEL everything no matter how painful, and the desire to be understood and share the experiences. The problem is you have built up walls of anger and resentment ten miles thick, partially I think because you’ve been deeply hurt. I get that and have done exactly the same thing over the years with various people, but learned that it serves no value beyond punishing myself. When you hold on to those walls of resentment, desperately out of fear of being hurt again, you also eliminate any chance of being happy because nothing gets past them. The good is shut out just as much as the bad.
I also think that behind your wall is a self preservation serving need to always be right, and you are repulsed by anyone or anything that challenges the prejudices and beliefs you are holding so tightly. You want the safety of having people never disagree or question your version of the truth, and you need to ask yourself WHY you react with such violent emotion when someone dares disagree with you. There is definitely a trigger there, but the question is, do you have the courage to face it?
I have triggers and walls too, though quite different ones. We are both on a Scorpionic journey here, and mine is no less valid that yours. We are all individual souls with individual realities, and the path to spirituality, soulfulness and fulfillment are deeply personal and unique. Anyone who says differently is selling something. 😉
Amen, sista! 🙂
Thank you sista! 🙂
ugh..
So Pheonix.. since you believe no one knows Scorpio like another Scorpio, what are the lessons that you are here to learn, being Scorpio enough that you can admit it?
Tolerance
Yes, I agree. The remarkable ‘Tolerance’ exemplified from the beginning of your game p.751
“… One more thing Pluto Puppy…I cannot resist and simply HAVE to ask: Just who do you think you are to demand everyone else adhere to your personal rules about what they can and cannot write about? I REALLY hope you were kidding with that post, but if not…Phew, arrogant much? :p ….”
We have much to learn about your very idea of Tolerance.;)
“….HEY. Hypocrite Coward FOOL…”
Well hey there Pot, Kettle here, nice to meet ya! :p
Sorry but your idea of tolerance is not what I’m shootin for. 😉
Everything I say here and have said to you prior is IN RESPONSE to your manipulative games. Fool.;)
Politicizing more and more “Juvenile”.. “beliefs” again huh. Don’t ever compare me to you.;)
I’m glad this exchange manifested. Or in your case, festered.
The public now knows Dark from Light. Lies from Truth…… with the exception you.;)
Nope, still disagree with your justification of your actions.
No biggy though, keep calling me names if it makes you feel better. 😉
Nope, festering here, quite the opposite. 🙂
I’m perfectly comfortable with everything I’ve said and stand by it 100%. No lies, just not what you want to hear. 😉
editing last post to say “No festering here”. lol Just have to clarify. 😉
Tolerance –
I have had some heavy experiences in this department.
Coming from one culture originally, and going to another, here in Latin America – was different.
Latin America is known for its revolutionary culture and dictatorships. The “rawness” of life is not hidden from the view of the public. The things I have seen could be considered shocking – but it is a REALITY here.
When two realities clash – here it means violence. For example, if one person is being robbed, the whole neighbourhood, complete with arsenal, could come out to deal with the thief.
On the other hand, the whole neighbourhood could also be involved in the robbery itself.
How does one handle themselves in an environment, where anything “goes”?
How do we obtain order out of chaos?
Tolerance is a double edged sword – but it depends how you “verb” this Noun.
A noun by itself is a person, place or thing – inanimate and without expression. A blob.
It is only when it moves, that expression is found. But we can not determine the MOTIVE for this movement. A huge unknown, until a pattern is established.
The other way, is when a subject (another noun) “verbs” the noun and gives an adjective. The act of “judging” (not tolerance) a person guilty of a crime or not.
So – true motives within the scheme of nouns (tolerance in this case) can only be established, within time. The original PATTEN that is currently being established, actually is the CURRENT REALITY.
Only when someone realizes that they are in “another NOUN” state of being that that they are in, will they start to “verb” themselves out of it.
Harmony through conflict – is an interesting concept to be thinking about here.
hmmmm…
What I find interesting Gatubela is that my actions are seen as “Intolerant” but not those of any one else.
Curious that, and it is one reason I made the comments about the double standard here. That is my perspective and experience. I realize you do not see it that way, and am not attacking you for it. 🙂
Standing Our Ground, has always been Politicized by pure weakness as an “attack”.
The End.
——————————-
Gatubela… don’t reply to her head-games, her deception.
You have already beautifully explained to the forum that her solutions to “real world problems” are futile.
Even her “curiosity” cannot see. We are witnesses to the expression of Nihilism. Verb.
One last try…
Phoenix, the double standard disappears when you feel the barrel of a gun on your back.
Try to feel that for a minute. All that you have – you can not take with you to “heaven” or “hell” – or where ever you think you will or will not go to.
Your vision of “what is important” will change.
It changes to a VALUE system based from a retrospective – hindsight “If I had only….” view.
Perhaps I should not have “been quiet”…”said nothing”…””walked away…”
This coupled with MY personality, permits me to be SOULFULLY honest with my self. EVEN under fire. It will not matter PHOENIX – if you feel the LOVE – PEACE – COMPASSION (the words that you have been using) in your heart, a little side comment from anyone, will NOT CHANGE this fundamental state of being.
The fact that you DID change – is very indicative. You can not hold your desired state of being -because for you, it seems to not be connected to your SOUL.
Hence the sensation of hypocrisy.
When you are dealing with people who actually have strived to END their own hypocrisy – and I include myself in this group – the word COWARD – is used often.
The reason being is that I have learnt from my own cowardice. Perhaps I should have kept my properties, money, business and great career and not have had to sleep on dirt floors for half a year – but I could not look in the mirror anymore and call myself a decent human being. This was years ago.
Although I do not recommend everyone to do this, I do recognize COWARDICE when I see it.
Again, there is no double standard –
Just the angels singing.
My tiffies with P.Puppy – have been resolved, because I did ask him to not allow me to fall into controlling energies. Just look at P.390 and P.392.
I recognize that subconscious damage I can cause to others. Therefore, for me, my negativity, is MY PROBLEM and no one elses.
I solve my conflicts on my own, because I have learnt that in a Chaotic environment, when you can not TRUST and HARM anybody, the only thing you have to work with …
IS YOURSELF. Therefore, there is nothing that anyone can do for me. It has to be my decision.
Since you know the power of Scorpionic energy, you should REALLY ask yourself, what P.Puppy is REALLY trying to do.
So…this means that for me, I do not have a need (most of the time) to express my negativity. I would much rather understand it. In my mind, a better world has to exist – but it won´t unless those SEEDS exist in me.
Perhaps I do have “crippling” imperfections. I could be too jealous, or too insecure, or get angry…money is a bit short, my future is uncertain, or that person is a JERK…but “WHAT AM I DOING ABOUT IT?”.
How do I proceed to solve this GREAT MYSTERY – because that is what it is. As you have said, we are not here to suffer. But then, how do you EASE suffering?
Well, for me, the first steps would be to understand it. Not segregate it. My understanding would have to come from myself first, before coming from others.
By facing my own “hypocrisy” (lack of soul connection required to GROUND / CRYSTALIZE my mental “BELIEFS / THOUGHTS”), I get rid of the word “COWARD”.
Crystalizing in this case would be the “VISIBLE RESULTS” of WHO YOU ARE. Don´t look at your bank account for this one. You will know who you are, when you face your own “DEATH”.
And by soulfully understanding and then grounding it (through DEEDS)- this VERB will show itself in my actions.
Therefore, I strive get rid of the word “hypocrite”, in the particular NOUN that I am working on. We all have different NOUNS (triggers) to work with.
My tolerance (not SCORN – not PITY – not Scorpionic NEGATIVITY) comes from my understanding – that we are all learning and how hard it can be sometimes. I see things as a process – so as you have said, we are all on a journey here.
My compassion (initially based on sweat and tears) comes from actually doing it. (VERB)
From there, the feeling of LOVE, is as P.Puppy has said.
Don´t worry about you being honest with your experiences – or attacking me. Perhaps, there are people who are meant to “question” as you have done, or be direct with their thoughts, as P.Puppy has done. Should we try to DENY all of our CORE personalities?
Perhaps, what I am saying, does not apply to you.
Tolerance will allow us to deal with this one.
You Gatubela… your inner being and self-development through death and resurrection symbolize the meaning of a True Phoenix on this forum.;)
Love Pluto.
i am laughing reading all of this because this is exactly what scorpio energy does…it lures you in, stings you, makes you try and justify yourself endlessly and then chuckles that you are still engaged….it amuses them and they are always right no matter what in their eyes so they are like talking to a brick wall and nonetheless you will try and make it right and all the while, hell have your energy…and a hard on…..take a breath, let go and see the game…that is all it is….and let him win…he’ll diffuse…it’s like a bully, ya know? walk away…as hard as it may be…it is a good tactic to disengage no matter how passionate he gets you cuz passion is not healthy if it is that kind of passion…..it’s a game and it;s no fun, honestly and by the way, scorpions have a choice to be decent strong good people if they buy into the negative thing..shame on them and bummer for you…..and me….i have one too and i’m getting angry at this bullshit.
Hi ….
Los ojos azules means blue eyes in spanish.
Yes, scorpionic energy would do exactly what you indicate….if you don´t have a pure heart. Then the energy is destructive and at its worse.
However, if you have a pure heart, the energy dynamics change to show its unquestionable awesome beauty, generousity and power to heal, especially through erradicating the illusion that besets the weary soul traveller and truth seeker.
Through choosing to do “good”….and sticking to it, all illusions will surface, even the huge one that you are mentioning. It indicates “what you can see”…and shows that you did not choose to go beyond the barrier of sexual passion, games, hard-ons etc.
If your scorpio happens to be negative, that actually is not a bummer for you. It just means that you have not been able to disengage your own toxicity, which imprisons you.
I doubt that there are many girls that are up to calling on this energy, but it actually welcomes women who have a very private sensuality and respect this energy, through being very attentive, focussed, cautious, and absolutely magnetized to one´s inner light and love…if you happen to have these qualities in you.
It will forgive your ignorance but will expect you to feel the consequences of it. What are you willing to do in order to understand its idea of love? It won´t matter if you feel “dirty”….what matters is “did you do it for love?” This explains the scorpionic characteristic of dipping into the darker areas of our own natures and society and its capacity to raise you from scorpion to phoenix.
This energy does not work with women, if you give that part of you up…you must maintain this inner focus. Therefore a degree of indepenence and fierce strength and sense of NOT wanting to involve others in solving your own problems, will leave you alone in your own hell, to feel the seriousness of your illusions and who you are. You MUST want to feel it and not expect anyone to help you.
The blend between purity of heart, and determination to see the truth, converts this energy to literally becoming a bigger pussy cat than i am…and healing you almost instantaneously by tending to your wounds.
Anyways….here is a song that I would like you to hear…
Hi Ojos Azules….
Take a look at this image….
http://thinng.com/661-hades-and-persephone-2-by-sandara
Angry isn’t really working though for you, is it? Your failure with your mate has nothing to do with this specific old exchange here on the forum. If you were actually involved then your comment (opinion) might hold water relative to what had transpired.
“Buying into negative” means someone is speaking up and the other is playing an unconscious controlling game. So Who between you and your mate could that be? Negative energy in my world is not about “winning”… it’s about evolving together. Does your mate have, show or prove that intent?.. for any mature resolution? Do you share True motivations for a resolution and can you surrender meaningless “anger”? Obviously you don’t or can’t… or you would not have written your misguided remarks here. Seeing his passion as “a game” as you clearly said with your mate is your first big failure. If you perceive your experiences as “bullshit” then you have choices to make and to do something about them instead of trying out bullshit a bullshitter. That’s not what I would call constructive negativity.
If you believe he is “a bully” well then… what does that say about your choice of partner? How does that reflect on your discernment of male, and what you value in that partner? Is your choice of partner our responsibility here on the forum?
Do you hear us politicizing “woe-is-me!.. but I know what’s really going on with male Scorpio” type language here on the forum? Do you read that context from us?
If you want any answers in your life you firstly need to ask a few questions. Firstly about thy-self. Can you face those real questions and deliver truthful answers to yourself? There is not one question in your post which suggests or wants resolution. Why would that be? Your post shares with us how you clearly know what’s going in your experiences and how we are all just to slow to catch on. Yeah, Not asking questions. It’s the same old theme throughout all small minds… who know what’s going on.
Yes…well let us continue with my experiences in obtaining justice (balance) though shedding “karmic energetic bonds”.
I do feel that this is a very crucial step in continue our journey and feeling the energies or “building blocks” that the planets have.
The process starts with “having enough of…” because you can not escape certain limitations placed on you. The only other way that this proces has been “softer” has been through teaching these things to children. Otherwise, we are having to “change a culture”. Anyone who studies comunication and marketting, as well as Quality Systems, fundamentally knows that this is impossible to do this.
However, it is considered ethical to influence chaotic conditions (non-linear systems behavior) with almost brainwashing results in order to get a buck off you. Looking at marketting campaigns is more than enough evidence of this.
Also, the things that we prefer to communicate are “negative” in origin. For example, you will not tell your loved one everything you did that morning – just the things that stood out. Imagine if we narrated our waiting at the busstop this morning, second by second.
…the birds chirped…a red car passed…then a blue one…
This is an incredible field of Learning Theory – and strongly indicates “HOW WE LEARN”…
Therefore, it seems that we must be “motivated” through “harmartic” conditions placed upon us…or better put … by necesity. What we choose to learn, depends on the energy of the code.
Well, if one is not under this necesity, well, then it is still possible to do this, because everyone is NOT PERFECT.
So, if anyone is feeling strong feelings when imagining any of the world´s horrors – which in Latin America, is a daily occurence, well this is an indication of WHO you ARE.
This is why I asked you to imagine your arrival to those “pearly” gates in the sky. How are you feeling? Resentment? Anger? Fear? Sadness? Any feeling of “resisting”? Denial?
Write those feelings down.
This is why P. Puppy says that “you are nothing”, because this is the subconscious damage that you could have projected on others. This is also your path to understanding.
It is all very subtle –
Through this, you start to understand yourself – BUT you must FIRST have a very good idea of the FEELING of LOVE. If you have not, this process will send you into states of emotional chaos.
If you have already decided what the ideal state of being is – and compare it to your present arrival to those pearly gates, perhaps it seems that you mainly act based on very few “negative” traits. For example – fear. Actually, fear is the MAJOR subtle emotion under all of our triggers (noun states of being).
Shocking is it not? You would think that the world had more complicated problems then a couple of negative traits, huh?
Nope! And I can imagine P.Puppy´s impatience with this one!
Then you must start observing yourself – for when these triggers activate. This is called “mindful” behavior. Actually, within 5 minutes of waking up, you might have probably fallen into a state of “trigger” mindset. Just try and feel the love, and make it to the bathroom, in that same state. Since you mention dreams, then you will know what I am talking about. What you KNOW in dreams, for some reason, can not be maintained in the waking state…
Or can it?
In my experiences and as P.Puppy has said, these states of being are in all of us and can be maintained as a daily state of being.
For many people, they start to experience the richochet effect, between what you know and what you feel. Or rather, the battle between soul and ego.
This very uncomfortable state of being, can be aliviated through LOVE (acheived through understanding yourself (because it is hard) and compassion (because you are doing it). Here, love acts as a BUFFER and eases the friction between these two poles. So, be gentle with yourself.
It is like being potty trained all over again. There is a lot of sh@#t, it takes practice, but because you have to, it gets easier as you go along. There was a time that you had to be taught to wipe yer butt, you know. (I always tell my children this)
Only through LOVING, can you overcome your own karmic bonds.
Nice and Concise. Thanks Gatubela lol
Well consciousness is pretty simple in my reality. This sight and hearing and feeling among the many who are unable to see or feel past their own projections. Empty, baseless ego projections. The hidden truth is many people simply fail to ‘Identify’ with other people on deeper, intuitive levels.
Hence “arguments”… hence “disagreements”… hence controlling efforts to regain ones equilibrium, or comfort level. This stuff is “very normal”. It always has been.
Yet after each “disagreement” do people grow in mind, heart and deed?
That depends on the INFLUENCE.
Much of our love or illusion among others, aside from NOT feeling authentic identification in another human being is our instinctive ‘Sensitivity.’
Which explains another angle of constant arguing and disagreement. Many folk are just flat-out insensitive of other people. Thoughtless. Ignorant. WHY??… Because they ‘feel’ loathsome within themselves… they ‘are’ completely Ego identified (attached to form) while lacking a fundamental heart and feeling identification.
So if a person cannot be sensitive with them-self, they project that thoughtless ego crystallization of hate and victimization and “get-even” deceptions, schemes and games onto others.
This behavior is nothing unusual. It’s everywhere, all around us.
I am guilty of impatience with others… especially the conniving, insecure and heartless.
I seek to wake them up out of their dead slumber.
My warrior Spirit, this powerful Will must respond. It must manifest and speak up as it see’s fit.
It’s WHO, I AM.;)
Patience is a toughie…
I have noticed that Scorpio tends to be “impatient” – actually, it is an endearing trait for me.
hmmmmm – Ever catch an eagle with their “toesies” in the cookie jar?
Unfortunately, due to the fact that it is a mixture of the awesome truthes and consequences that they have already “laser” beamed out (and believe me when I say that they have already the the past, present and future of it, here and beyond, perhaps in different planes of existence)…mixed with their sense of compassion and duty, (yes…DUTY based on their experiences and lessons learnt in this reality), eagles were never in the cookie jar in the first place. It only seemed that way.
The intention (minus the impatience and all of its consequences – which is in fact, a very real part of life), was to teach by exposing you to REALITY.
It means nothing if you don´t feel it.
Oooopsie! I made a mistake.
This is the correct sentence…
…I say that they have already seen the past, present and future of it…
However, I have had my experiences with patience as well.
Patience is a beautiful feeling – seizing the moment(s) and realizing that it is perfect and all is as it should be.
It is allowing someone to fall, and committing yourself to BE THERE as you KNOW that they will get up. If they won´t get up, it is walking the path of TRUTH.
It is allowing someone to BE, KNOWING that they will be alright and that they are doing “the best that they can”.
Seeing “the end” before everything started. Those bunny dreams containing “what you feel it should be”…and feeling connectedness, not alone, and full of love.
Through patience – or long suffering, it all “makes sense” and permits you to see it to the end, when others would have “fallen”.
Patience also means that you choose to walk a path of TRUTH, because that is where it will lead you. It culminates in the sacrifice of your own desires and wants for viruous choices and behavior – even if it is temporary, until the objective is achieved. The objective is TRUTH through LOVE.
Through choosing virtuous behavorior, while being patient, under “trigger” influence, you can learn more about the true meaning of becoming “PURE”, through love and strength and finding your INNER DIVINE SELF – and what was not seen before, becomes visible.
Actually, it was through the nurturing and creative light of patience that I began to see everything very clearly, from beginning to end, to realize that for each beautiful moment, we should strive to live it with humility and love, coupled with our regained childhood spirit, even under duress, strife and pain.
One does not “learn” patience. One must suffer the consequences of impatience through conscious behavior and begin to love oneself.
“…Seeing “the end” before everything started…”
Ah Yes. I see and feel the writing on the wall before it actually happens.
That is why I mentioned my Still and Silent…. Glare. Not a contrived chummy bluff.
When I center my energy, ground my soul and breathing, I feel the pysche of a person very quickly. Their………. Motivation.
Intensity baby. Felt ff mind, of emotion and of sexuality. Raw instinct.
That energy communicates with me. And I listen to it… very, very carefully.;)
“…When I center my energy, ground my soul and breathing…”
Well, I am taking singing lessons – while I can – to work on my “expression”.
I have been told that I am “not a chick”. I don´t mind this really because I prefer to find other ways to “loosen up”.
Singing is not very “delicate” actually. Only the results are! I have had to separate types of breathing – and I don´t feel very “chick-like” doing it. I have had to stick out my belly, expand the thoracic cavity…do combinations of this as well.
Well, maybe I won´t find out people´s motivations – perhaps I can find out peoples psyche through their divine long suffering patience in sticking around, while I hypnotically “yowl, meow and screech” them out of their “slumber”.
No…I don´t sing that badly – honest! (well maybe in Spanish)
Wow! This is a very interesting site..
I’ve been reading this site for the past 3 days now. I’m so tempted to write so here I go…
I am a little depress these past few weeks trying to understand this Scorpio guy or shall I say I am a confused bunny right now 😛 . I am Taurus and this is my first time getting involved with a Scorpio guy.
I met this guy 2 years ago when I moved to US for a Job. I had a bad break up with a Leo guy and it was the lowest point of my life. I moved to US to forget all bad things that happened in my life. I was not ready to entertain suitors. Whoever come and approaches me or show any interest I just snap them with “I already have boyfriend” and very much happy with my relationship right now. I wanted guys to leave me alone or maybe it was some kind of revenge or it was just hard for me to let go.
One fine day Mr. Scorpio approaches me and introduced himself. He says I never approach a girl before but maybe we could be friends. He works in the same company so he always sees me around. First impression, I was like ok… No big deal. But I find it so strange. I was not attracted to him at all.
One day he catches me during a bus ride from work and started a conversation that he knows about my favorite music, he knows a lot about me.. etc… He freaks me out! I guessed He googled my name and check stuffs about me. He finds out my music channel, networking sites and etc. I was so annoyed and he scares me. He doesn’t know that he scares me because I just play it cool and talk to him nicely.
When he fines me alone in office like in the pantry having coffee he tries to start a conversation with me. I felt he likes me and he was attracted with me. He stalks me and it freaks me out! He never confess that he like me but I can tell. I decided this stalking thing has to stop. In one of our conversation I mentioned that I already have a bf. I also love to cook and enjoy cooking for my bf etc etc. I knew I hurt his feelings but I was just not so into him kind off…
I thought he is going to stop like other guys do. But he still stalks me and tried to be close to me. I ignored him. He sent me notes that he would like to drive for me to home etc. I ignored him…
I couldn’t move on from my ex. I was so sad. I felt so alone and more miserable. I decided to go back to my country. When he finds out, he tried his best to stop me. He tried to convince me to stay but I didn’t listen. He asks me to go out have breakfast/lunch/dinner at least before I go but I ignored him. I told him that do not have a time because I am busy packing and need to rush to airport etc..
I feel so bad and terrible looking back 😦 … but it was just wrong timing. I wish I could turn back time but it is impossible.
I am back in my country. Finally get rid of Mr Scorpio haha.. I felt happier here because I have my friends and I can easily access my family to support me.
2 years has passed….
What Mr. Scorpio did after I left him?
To be continued… Will update later need to go back to work 😛
Hi Lovemari!
Well, we are all looking forward to hearing more of your story.
Have you healed from your previous boyfriend? I imagine that this would have to be first and foremost.
On a personal note, it seems that you feel very acutely, the consequences of the choices that you have made. However, Mr. Scorpio could have known the truth about your “boyfriend” situation (or rather, that you did not have one).
I did notice that you ignored him – so of course, I do wonder if you tried to talk to him? If he clearly stated that he was not interested, then of course, we would have to hear the rest of your story. Did you clearly tell him how he made you feel?
Was there a concrete reason why you never had that “breakfast/lunch/dinner” with him? Sometimes, we have to act on “virtue” and not on “desire”. Was your will stronger, based on some greater principle?
I am glad that you are back in your country. It is never easy to be alone. Good for you!
Hi Gatubela,
It is so liberating to write my story here 🙂
I have never told anyone about Mr Scorpio guy before. I hope he will not come across this site hahaha. It will definitely embarrass me like he always does. He like to tell me things he finds out about me and laugh about it :-P.. He likes to research stuffs about me. I thought it was scary and weird that is why I avoided him but now I find it cute hahaha
I am posting the 2nd part of my story soon..
LoveMari
Hi Gatubela,
Regarding why I turned down the invitation to go out with him.. I was so preoccupied of how to get myself out of this foreign country. I was sad and miserable. I felt like I don’t deserve to go out with any guy with this state of mind. I kinda like punishing myself that time. I wasn’t ready to talk to any guy. I was not interested to live I think…
Looking back.. I think he could have helped me heal.. but I am very stubborn. I want to fix things my way…
Here is the continuation of my story… (Part 2)
I am back in my place, my comfort zone… I took a break from work and spent time with my family but I didn’t tell them what I’ve been going through. Being the eldest child of the family and the breadwinner. I never allow them to see me at my lowest point. They know me as a strong person who can handle things well. I spent time with my best friends who can keep me company but I never talk about my heartache.
Time has passed… the healing process was very slow. Maybe I tried to punish myself because I felt it was my fault that my relationship with the Leo guy did not work out. I turned down his marriage proposal because I felt it was too early for me. I have obligations with my family. He waited for 3 years untill he gave up and decided to marry someone else through an arrange marriage. He was my first bf, I loved him so much but I love my family too.
I kept myself busy and slowly moving on.. I started coming back to life again. Typical bull, I work very hard but I like to enjoy the goodness of life and fruits of my hard work. I started feeling happy again.. Not dating any guy.. Just enjoying life like travel, shopping and being single.
So where is Mr. Scorpio Guy in the picture?? 🙂
I do find him online once in a blue moon. I didn’t mind chatting with him once in awhile anyway he lives miles away so he won’t be able to stalk me again. He makes me smile every time we chat. He has a very good sense of humor and a very smart person. He never says that he likes me but I do not know why he is so interested to know everything about me. He said he want to meet me again.
He wanted to have access to my networking site, photos and etc but I did not allow him. I also don’t tell him much about me which I think makes him more interested. Being hard on him is not intentional; my instinct tells me not to trust this guy or maybe any guy. I continuously lied about “my bf” situation, whenever he asked I simply say we are ok. I do not know how to take it back and let him know that I am very much single. He didn’t stop chatting with me though…
Late year 2010 after 2 years of being away from each other he informed me that he is coming to my country. He will stay for 3 days; he wants to meet me before he will go for short vacation to his own country.
So we met… I do not know what happens but I felt some kind of connection. I like talking to him; he is intelligently funny and has very deep personality. He tends to be quite sometimes but I know there is something in there…he is thinking… I realized that he actually looks good and there is always this mystery in his eyes as if he is reading each and every inch of my move. But! I haven’t fallen for him yet! I feel like I am dealing with a very dangerous guy.
To be continued…
Need to go back to work again… Will update part 3 shortly because I really need your advice…
Hi Lovemari
…”I feel like I am dealing with a very dangerous guy.”
Well, you probably are (but in a good way) – if he “knows” everything about you. Another very endearing characteristic about Scorpio. Most guys would not make that effort – but I guess it is a double edge sword for some.
“…He tends to be quite sometimes but I know there is something in there…he is thinking…”
Yes, well their “thinking” activity, actually has a “noise” for me. It is very high frecuency buzzing – strange huh?
“…I want to fix things my way…”
Me too. My sense of duty and feeling people´s souls and prioritizing their growth and freedom, will not permit it any other way. Therefore, my will (must)overcome my desire(s). I KNOW the terrible consequences of my actions, as I am told them by the SOURCE. Therefore, if I fail myself, I fail everybody, and I am nothing. No one (including myself) has to be a monster due to my weaknesses.
I understand you a bit in terms of your feeling of responsibility. But if you are “free” now, I feel that you deserve every opportunity for happiness. However, you have classified him as a “stalker” , dangerous, intelligent, funny, he “looks good”…
But would you like to get to know him as much as he seems to know you?
“…my instinct tells me not to trust this guy or maybe any guy.”
ALL guys?!!! or ALL relationships (with a Guy)? Maybe you haven not met the right one. Do you understand why your instict is reacting so?
“… I continuously lied about “my bf” situation, whenever he asked I simply say we are ok.”
Scorpio could pick up on “evasive” actions…especially if you were “lying”. I hope that you are not lying now – and being honest with yourself and everyone else (as much as you can – we can´t all run around butt naked – although sometimes I even have to check if all my clothing is on. Where the heck is that satellite – that they are using!!!) I would imagine that “knowingly done” deception is playing with someone´s feelings.
Hi Gatubela,
Thank you for taking time to read my posts and sharing your insights.
I really appreciate it.
I know I’ve been really unfair to Mr Scorpio for lying about having a bf. The thought of loosing his respect if he comes to know the truth is killing me.. I know I am being the bad guy here 😦
I’ve been very unfair to myself too. You are right I deserve every opportunity for happiness.
***ALL guys?!!! or ALL relationships (with a Guy)? Maybe you haven not met the right one. Do you understand why your instict is reacting so?***
Honestly, I do not why my instinct is reacting like this. Its either I haven’t found the right one or am just afraid to fall to a guy again and get hurt..
I am not sure if Mr Scorpio is the right one and my chance to be happy again….
Part 3 (Last part)
Mr. Scorpio came all the way from US to Singapore to see me. Something I have not expected from him after being so hard on him, ignoring him when I was in US, running away from him and thinking that I still have a bf. He makes it a point that he came to see his old buddies in SG I think in order for me not to feel so conceited haha.. but I can sense that he was very excited to see me… apparently I was very excited too.
He said “I knew it! I will need to make the effort to see you again. You will never come to me. I am fed up! Next time I will need to come to see you again. You will never make an effort” Then we laughed about it. I do not know if he was serious but in my mind “Oh my Gosh! I think I like this guy!” But… there is always a but!!!… I do not know why?? We also talk about future, marriage etc. I told him that I enjoy being single and I might not get married (I forgot that I supposed to have a bf). For you, your parents will help you find a mate and get married (based on their culture). He looks at me in the eyes and said “Who knows, the unexpected might happen”. I was speechless and slowly changed the topic. His eyes are piercing and he is freaking me out again (in good way).
It was a short meet up, I had a good time. He said he will call me when he reaches his hometown. He didn’t call!! I was not affected though. He called me only after few weeks when he was back in US. He said he was busy the past few weeks that is why he wasn’t able to call, he appreciates the time we spent together and he enjoyed my company. I was happy to hear from him.
He started calling me every day. He said “You can stalk a girl for a long time” But you just got to talk to her once and for all . I said ok.. no harm.. I enjoyed talking to him. I feel that he knows me very well. I can talk about my stuffs even girly stuffs haha and he understands it very well. I felt like I found a new friend who knows me and understand me.
I think he also does his own research about me. He surprises me whenever he says things that he doesn’t supposed to know about me. He likes to investigate.. now it makes sense to me “HE IS A SCORPIO”. I didn’t know about Scorpio stuffs until I read this site. He never clearly said that he likes me but when we don’t talk for awhile he said he miss me a little… only a little … quite manageable. I just laugh my head off.. I find it very cute haha..
One day he called me when I was at work. It was not my day, I was dealing with a lot of issues in office and feels like people are calling me to fix all their problems. I was happy to see his call and jokingly said… hello! Tell me what is your problem?! I’ve been dealing with issues since morning maybe you have a problem too. He said.. Yes I have a problem… I said tell me what is the problem.. I was a little scared to know his problem…. He said… are you single?? (In my mind, why is he asking? Did he forgot that I told him that I have bf already)… for some reason.. I said… Yes…. I am single….. then he said… I like you a lot …. Yah that is my problem… but it is not that I am crazy about you or it is going to be the end world if I don’t have you of course I still need to know you more… (In my mind, wow! I like those lines… it is very cute haha). I said.. I do not know what to say… he said its ok you don’t need to comment for now… I just want to let you know how I feel… I leave it to your discretion. I want to take our friendship to the next level… I said ok. I couldn’t sleep that night…
After few days he called again, I thought it was just a normal talk as usual. But in the middle of our conversation while I was talking about none sense he stops me and said can I be brutally honest with you??? I want to tell you something… I was scared but I said ok tell me… I am going to tell you this but it’s alright… Don’t worry after I tell you this we will leave it behind and will not dig into the past ok?? I said ok (trembling… I think I know what he is about to say) then he said… “YOU DO NOT HAVE A BOYFRIEND!” STUPID!!! All this time you lied about having boyfriend!!
I was speechless…… I kept quite… I wanted to hang up the phone and don’t talk to him anymore. There was a moment of silence for awhile… then he break the silence by saying it is ok… past is past we are not going to dig into it. I’ve been trying to tell you this for the past 3 days but I couldn’t find the right timing. He tried to assure me that it’s ok nothing to worry.. but he said “I wish you could just tell me that you don’t like me instead of lying”. It was very embarrassing… I couldn’t talk…… I was caught in the moment and I forgot to say “I’m sorry”. Until now I feel so guilty.
He knew that he is making me uncomfortable so he tried to change the topic. I asked him how he came to know … he said it is like connecting the dots. He found that the guy whom I told my BF is already married even before I moved to US. He explained it to me like a detective. Then he changed the topic and we went to our normal discussion. In my heart, I knew I hurt him a lot and I want to make it up with him I just don’t know how.
He continuously calls me every day. He makes me happy… yes… he does make me happy… I told that to myself many times. I love it when he laughs about my silly jokes and I can laugh about myself. I think I find a found a new best friend in him. He is very intelligent and very good adviser too. He is only 29 yrs old and I am 27. I promised myself that I will be true to him and I will just be myself. I wanted to tell him that I want to give him a chance rather give myself a chance to get to know him more because I like him too and he is very special to me now. I wanted to say that the next time he is going to call me… but then.. he stops calling!! Strange because he calls me every day and the last time we talk he said he likes me so much….
So I waited… he didn’t call for 2 weeks… I missed him so badly…I found myself calling his number. He was surprise to receive my call. I asked him what happened. I am worried about you. He just simply says I’ve been very busy lately… I got a project with a very aggressive deadline etc.. (In my mind.. They didn’t send you to the moon to do the project there… You have an internet and telephone in your office to contact me. I even noticed that he avoided me when he saw me online. WTH happened here?!) He doesn’t sound so interested to talk to me as well. I stayed calm and cool. I told him ok I will not disturb you… Just call me whenever you’re free (but I was annoyed, I thought he will be happy to talk to me since it was my first time calling him it was a big deal to me huh).
Things are very different now; I do not know why I am so affected of his cold behavior. I think I started falling for him. A week later he called finally… he is back with his normal behavior. So I thought he must be real busy when he stops calling me for 3 weeks!!! !
Now here is my biggest problem.
During my last conversation with him he was very emotional. We talk for several hours; He talks about his family, his personality, he said he is not a very expressive person and he is very vengeful when he is wronged by people around him. I said oh no that is not good. You should learn how to forgive. So you will revenge on me then?? He said no.. I like you soo much that I can never think of taking revenge on you. 10 years from now if somebody ask me if you know this girl… I will tell them that she is awesome! (gosh!.. This guy knows how to sweep me of my feet).
He talks about how he would handle our relationship if we are to become a couple. He said he could be the guy I could ever dream of. He talks about what he likes about me and I love how he lifts my soul when we talk about my issues physically & emotionally. He started to say all the things he knows about me, as usual he freaks me out. He loves it when he surprises me! I still feel embarrass though… I complained why he keep on checking things about me. I told him… “One day when I see you I am going to kick you for doing this to me”. Then he said… you know why I spent so much time to know more about you and check things about you?? It is because “I love you”… yes dear.. I love you..
I thought it was very sweet but I find that it was quite difficult for him to utter those words. He sounds so embarrass saying those words to me. That was the first time he said he loves me and completely opened up his feelings towards me.
I think am just bad in handling this type of situation.. As usual I was speechless. .. I didn’t know what to say… I asked him… Since when?? (oh my god! Why did I asked that.. silly..) He said… I can’t tell you the time and date (lol)… I asked him ‘Are you sure?”.. he said yes… I kept quiet for awhile then he said, you know this is going to come back to you… he is waiting for my response..
Then our cultural differences came into my mind. I said I am not sure if I am ready for a relationship right now.. . I asked him how about your parents? Have you ever think of them? If they come to know and if they object..You might leave me like what my ex boyfriend did. (I was looking for an assurance that he is going to be firm and whatever happens he will stand by me). He said.. it doesn’t mean that if it happens with your ex then it is going to be the same with me… I felt he got fed up.. He said… I cannot take all this doubt from you… you can only take it by yourself… (He is right but I still want an assurance from him). Then he said… Let’s talk again some other time. I need to go to sleep now. I realized it was already 8 Am his time and we’ve been talking for 5 hours. ..
That was my last conversation with him and he haven’t called for 6 weeks now 😦
I miss him so much…. He posted a status message in his facebook saying.. “I do miss her” Don’t I?”
I do not know if that was for me but why is he not calling when he said he loves me???? 4 days ago I posted a message in his wall saying “I am so annoyed with you right now”. Immediately 1 minute later he called he said he have been travelling and been very busy. I told him I am going to call you later because I am at work. When I called him he did not pick up the call…
I am really confused right now? I do not know if he truly loves me. I am afraid that he is just playing with my emotions because he is being revengeful. Please advice what should I do…
Sorry if my posts are very long and too detailed. I think people can only advice if they know the whole story. I just hope he won’t find this online…
Hi Lovemari,
“…I do not know if he truly loves me. I am afraid that he is just playing with my emotions because he is being revengeful. Please advice what should I do…”
I could not speak for him – I hope that he does. Love is very “elusive” – true love, that is. However, once it is in YOUR heart, it won´t matter. Once it leaves your heart, it will be very hard to get it back. My concern is for this precious state of BEING – and that it should be valued and treasured above all. Women do not realize that if their men are soulfully happy, then this world will be a better place to be in.
So, it seems that you are in a state of instability based on confusion. Please understand, that most of the time, women are working with very strong energies when dealing with Scorpio. Strangely, most women do not perceive the “underlives” that they have lived. Honestly, if they have “swooped” you, you have to work through their karma/battles/women that they have been with so you get to know everything about them too! They don´t get off so easy either 😉
Your balance is a must. The reason being, that if you do not keep it, the relationship will fail. The idea of keeping love – and him – in your heart goes much more beyond candlelight dinners and “how he makes you feel” – and him being “the guy of your dreams”.
Each person is like a “universe” – meaning that they have their energy. When you feel the weight of the “universe” and carry it as you would yourself – then perhaps you can understand what is REALLY going on in Relationships. Permitting another person to “fall” out of a state of “loving themselves” is actually “anti-love”. I don´t recommend taking that VERY PERSONAL POWER away from anybody. I do feel that we should strive to EMPOWER and not “TAKE AWAY POWER” from people. As a general statement, women and men can be cruel to eachother by expecting the other person to “ease the discomfort” when they find themselves out of their “comfort zone”. I can usually feel this “dehydrating and killing” between couples as soon as I walk into a house.
I am saying this, because I feel that you should work on loving yourself (breaking through karmic limitations) and becoming an expert in maintaining this vital balance. Once you can maintain it yourself, you will know how to maintain it in him.
I am glad that he knows now that you do not have a boyfriend. But this honesty has to come from YOU. If he is understanding – that is nice, but don´t make “dishonesty” a habit. It seems that you have healed from your previous Leo – and that is a good thing.
“…He said he could be the guy I could ever dream of…”
Well – most women would get angry at me for saying this – but why be interested in this? Nevermind the fact that he is probably right (darn guy!!! I hate it when they do that) – since he knows everything about you, but WHO he REALLY is, should always be the goal. I would not accept this sacrifice – because it takes away from your capacity to give (of) yourself and “LOVE HIM”. Giving (of)yourself through love, is the most strongest place a woman and man can be – as it combines the most beautiful energies that exist.
Relationships will fail if we do not have higher purposes for ourselves and the most purest intentions coupled with tenderness, for the person that we love. There is room for nothing else – in a relationship based on true love.
Therefore, you can see – that confusion would not have occurred – if you knew how to maintain your balance, through releasing attachment.
Hi again Lovemari,
For you, your parents will help you find a mate and get married (based on their culture).
This could be an issue! If he does not respect his parents, how will he respect you? Is this a “flexible” thing, or will he suffer consequences from his family and culture, if he decides on who he will marry?
When I was younger, I was not mindful about my relationships – and a failed marriage was the result. I realise now (better late than never), that I was impulsive. My ex-husband was a Scorpio rising. (sigh)
So the idea is this – take away your “desire”, your fear, your happiness, your “attraction to this man” – take it all away and wipe the slate clean.
What are you left with? If the answer is “nothing” – then there is work to be done.
Are you REALLY his – on all levels? Is he REALLY yours on all levels?
“I think I find a found a new best friend in him. He is very intelligent and very good adviser too.”
Great!!! Besides the “let´s work on you part” in my previous comment – if you feel that you have found a new best friend, why have you not talked to him about it? Just straight up tell him how he makes you feel? Have you done this? I did notice that he told you that he loves you, but you “have not fallen for him” yet. You seem to have the foundations for REAL comunication, as, from your comments, he seems very sincere in this department.
I would rather feel discomfort from the truth (i.e. know if he is really interested in me) than regret from an “illusion”. The truth will permit me to “move on”. Continuous efforts to grow and know the truth (even if it is painful) is better than the state of confusion and lack of inertia felt in your comments.
Getting down to the nitty gritty of it, whether or not he loves you, is not the point. There is something to be said for marriages that last decades – and I doubt that it was all smooth sailing. WHO you are has to be consistent through the GOOD and the BAD. Usually, this consistency is maintained through spiritual means.
“Things are very different now; I do not know why I am so affected of his cold behavior. I think I started falling for him. ”
Maybe you have. This is beautiful, but maintain your balance based on centering love.
Love is not easy.
Hi Lovemari…
“He said “You can stalk a girl for a long time” But you just got to talk to her once and for all.”
Well, I “guess” he would be right! Did you tell him that “talking” (instead of “stalking”) is … good? (wide-eyed, sincere pokerface understatement)
Well, this is VERY scorpio. I am still looking for that friggin´satellite. (Where the HECK is that camera, I know it is somewhere around!!!
“I do not know if he was serious but in my mind “Oh my Gosh! I think I like this guy!” But… there is always a but!!!… I do not know why??”
“He said… I cannot take all this doubt from you… you can only take it by yourself…”
Well, he would be “right” again!
Don´t enter the serious part of a relationship in Fear. If you think about it, you are not really “falling” for him, but “falling” into your “abyss” – i.e. confusion, insecurity, indecisiveness, rationalizations, sexuality issues, past boyfriend trauma etc. It will all come up – his and yours – so it is imperative that you “journey” with calmness and tranquility, as much as you can.
You are not ready to love yet and perhaps neither is he. If he is evolved and understanding, he already knows it. The reason being, is that this “hades” is surfacing up in the relationship. It must be dealt with first.
For the longest time, my little boy (pisces) would cry everytime he had to look for his socks in the morning. He always woke up a bit groggy and “in his world”. I would be firm and say “Find them”. He cried, because he had “lost” them in his room, and did not organize himself. Eventually, when he would cry harder, I said to him…
“If you can not handle looking for your socks, then go back to bed. The day has hardly started, and you are unable to do this very simple task. Life does not get any easier, so being good at “Finding your socks” is the first skill to master.”
Well, I hope that I have given you a bit a space to grow and seek the answers to the questions that are coming up. The answers must be sought out – with him and yourself. I can only say to you – go seek them!!!
Hi Gatubela,
Thanks for your responses.
He finally contacted me today.
He confesses that “I really don’t think I love you. But I like you to the extreme. I can’t think a lifetime with you dear. I would do anything for you, you are one of the best I found in my life and I will be following you till my death.
I told him Thank you being honest. He said don’t be sarcastic if you are angry let it out. I asked him if this the reason why he retreated after saying that he loves me. He said Yes, I have been living with the pain of misleading you. I asked why? He said, because I thought it would work and I was wrong. My ego delayed the declaration.
I told him that, I have to admit, I am a bit hurt right now… but I would rather feel discomfort from the truth. Thank you for being honest. He said, i take full responsibility of this i told i was in love but later I realized that I can’t take this through.
He mentioned that he travelled to his country recently due to family issues.I said, let me guess you are engage right now? He said no! I did not got engage and dumped you. He will let me know if he will get engage.
He said, I did not intrinsically fell like involving you in my family affairs. It did not bother me much to let you know abt my travel.
I said ok…
I’m sorry if I behaved like I should know what is happening with you…
You just made me feel like I did something wrong to scare you away that is why I tried to reach you.
He said, no no no. You did not do anything to scare me away. I like you on any given day of the week
liking and living is different. I just feel that I am not qualified for a couple relationship with you.
I said…Thank you for the friendship anyway… You are one of the few people who knows me and understands me. I really like you too.. but now I realized I was right about my fear of getting into serious relationship…
He said.. “oh please, one bad guy does not reflect all people in the world both of us know better about it. It is not like we are cutting out, are we?
I said of course not. He said thanks, I was scared that you would never want to talk to me.. no matter what, you are stuck with me now.
i said.. you are a friend to me… I never cut friends just like that… they only cut me out. Then we said bye to each other.
I am really hurt right now. I am shock! I wanted to cry but for some reason I couldn’t shed a tear. Why am I hurt?? I thought he was my chance to be happy again but now I feel like its gone. I don’t understand why he would still want to be in touch with me after all this drama. I did not want to show am angry and affected. I don’t want to be angry. Do I have a reason to be angry?? But how can someone can sound so sincere and romantic and snap! They tell you in the face that ” Actually, I don’t really love you…
Deep inside me I feel like I don’t want to loose him and maybe there is still a chance to win his love. But should I just cut him out of my life?
LoveMari
Hi Loveari,
“…But how can someone can sound so sincere and romantic and snap! They tell you in the face that ” Actually, I don’t really love you…”
A beautiful and very true statement, coming from someone who understands what LOVE is and knows himself very well.
Scorpionic energies are very giving and due to this fact, they leave a “signature” that is easily picked up.
If you are into DIVINE FEMININE: Divine feminine is the energy found BEFORE the SPOKEN word. They can be considered the SEEDs of the FRUIT of your actions. So, everything that Scorpio said, can be traced back into a type of “seed”. So, understanding why he had the need to decieve, is most important to HIS healing.
He must release, even in the face of his “deception”. Strive to make him understand that these are “chains” that are useless and all can be forgiven. Strive to keep him in the state of loving himself. Don´t let him fall into the abyss. He must understand that there is no such thing as deception, when the forces of love are present. He should know this better than anyone, since he KNOWS everything about you. Could you “decieve” him? No. Perhaps he is not used to someone using their own “personal power” to know everything about him as well. Since your instinct “KNEW” then he did not really deceive you either.
This is the power of the DIVINE FEMININE – I know things way before they happen. If you look at post 421 – you will see that I react to the energies to come.
Catching the Eagle in the cookie jar. We are all children. (By the way, kittycats have a sixth sense for these “birdies”. I think it has something to do with the “pouncing” instinct)
The answer to your question is this: Because TRUE LOVE is elusive. It is a very hard state of being to maintain. Scorpio knows more than anyone, what is REALLY involved.
“…I would do anything for you, you are one of the best I found in my life and I will be following you till my death.”
I don´t accept this offer. But if he is sincere, wish him well, and bless him with all you have.
“… then he said, you know this is going to come back to you… he is waiting for my response..”
No, his deception is going to come back to him – but not through your doing. Strive to release him from PLUTO´s punishment, by asking him to maintain his virtuous behavior and honesty.
“…He said Yes, I have been living with the pain of misleading you…”
You know – my ex did the damage he did, because I LOVED him. Each day, I suffer with this. He knew that I loved him – But he used that against me and my children in order to satisfy his EGO.
He mislead me. But it was a marriage not dating. So of course, I know all about scorpio´s revenge. However, he stalks me to hurt me and my children. My beautiful doberman puppy – her spirit, ( I named her SYRIA) was destroyed by him, due to his cruelty. That black cat that I loved, was also killed.
I can not stress to you, that he has not really mislead you. You did not fall for him, remember?
LOVE has to be something you ARE – FIRST. God, in his divinity, reveals everything and protects the person who prioritizes love in their hearts. In these energies, all negativity is DISSOLVED. Can you imagine this state of being?
He said, i take full responsibility of this i told i was in love but later I realized that I can’t take this through.
Yes he can – and I hope that he does with someone beautiful and deserving. There is probably a wonderful person for you to. Learn these energies and be greatful that he was honest.
I was scared that you would never want to talk to me.. no matter what, you are stuck with me now.
I do not have the answer to this one – but I strive to not be scared of anything anymore. I would hope to be able to transmit this energy to the people who are reading. To break free of fear and limitations – and understand that this is not necessary in order to live a wonderful life. We can become happy – once we understand what it takes. This suffering is NOT what we should wish upon anyone.
*went to get a cup of coffee*
“…Deep inside me I feel like I don’t want to loose him and maybe there is still a chance to win his love. But should I just cut him out of my life?…”
Lovemari, the answer to this question depends on what you want for yourself. Scorpionic energy is not fluid – it penetrates to the bottom of everything. This is an example of its effect. He won´t move – if he is under the penetrative and purifying “from heaven to hell” effects of his own energy.
This is not a bad thing, but your growth should not be dependent on HIM. The person represents the energy. The energy DOES NOT represent the person. This is important, because most of us go around falling for the PERSON and not understanding the ENERGY.
Until we reach a state of being able to BALANCE our own energies, we are actually “slaves” of it.
Once we balance out our own energies, Mr. Scorpio will be seen under the light of your own soul. This is a different way of looking at things, as I have said before, NEGATIVITY is DISSOLVED under DIVINE FEMININE. It does not exist.
You must decide what you want. Plutonic energies are very purifying – so be gentle with yourself as all of the negativity comes up.
On the other hand, you can not be friends AND “try to win his love”. This is illusion.
Therefore, as I have stated before, work on you and well – PRAY. Find GOD, FEEL your SOUL in yourself. Get to know YOU – I assure you that you are beautiful. But you do not know it yet.
Your answer will come. So go and “find those socks” yourself, and try not to get anyone else to do it for you.
I hope that I have been able to expand your mind and give you gentle much needed room to understand that you must do it on your own.
Lovemari,
You have to allow a worthy male Scorpio to penetrate you. Your heart and feelings. If you run from the fear of surrender you will remain afraid of real intimacy, deeper than friendship love. You must not psychologically permit yourself to feel, to experience hurt or betrayal of trust.
Deeper, real, meaningful love demands RISK taking. Because if you do not push your inner capacity to feel, to experience EVERYTHING you miss out on tremendous opportunities to conquer your deep subconscious fears.
Face your fears in love, and become someone beyond your current self-restriction.
Real love is a fearless verb. By two people, not one.
Correction,
“…You must psychologically permit…”
Let the scarey male Scorpio energy enter you. You’ll transform through the intensity.;)
Hi Guys,
I cannot rest my mind so I find myself writing again…
I am deeply hurt right now.. I didn’t see this coming.
I thought I can almost see that dream I am dreaming then just like that … it’s gone!
I do not know why but after all the things that he said… I still find myself waiting for his call…
I feel terrible but I definitely learned from this experience. Thank you guys for your advices. It helps a one way or another.
….“ True love is elusive” …
When it comes it takes every breath, it speaks through your soul and takes away the pain. But love doesn’t come everyday. I hope it won’t be too late but I will stay positive.
If I will be lucky enough to find true love, I have to learn to embrace it without fear of being vulnerable. I have to work on my fears and get to know me first for me to give my 200 % to someone again.
….”Face your fears in love, and become someone beyond your current self-restriction”….
I will… I know I owe myself big time… I deserve to be happy, be loved and fall in love again. (Wow! I noticed that I’ve been writing so much about love after a the longest time… Am I in love???? ☺)
I have to face difficulties and sadness with courage. Transform discouragement into optimism and trust.
It is easy said than done but I will find a way, with God’s guidance… I will..
I hope Mr. Scorpio learned from this experience as well. I hope he will find his way to evolve from Stings to Wings. I hope that he would be able to feel and experience unconditional love that he deserves. It hurts that I might not be the girl whom he will share this love when he transform into an eagle but I wish him all the best. I would love to see him soar above the sky.
I will let him fly for now… if he returns… I promise I won’t be shaken by the intensity of Scorpio energy… I will allow this energy to transform me and seek for that elusive love.
If not…. God has the master plan. I know there is someone wonderful out there for me.
Hi Lovemari,
This is a bit hard for me to put into words…
You have already found a truer form of love already…and if you seek it, then you will continue to do so.
True love can not be taken away once the deception falls away. That is like saying that the SOURCE could disappear.
There are “no cards left to tumble” when the last card is love.
Humility plays a very important part in this. Understand that we are all imperfect, and be compassionate to those imperfections. Instead of feeling hurt, an alternative is feeling “tenderness”.
Most women would say that I am nutty. But I have learned that you are either creating or destroying when “loving”. These are very powerful forces and actually should be respected.
The battle ground is sexual energy.
Scorpio (men) always wants to penetrate – but as a feminine energy, this is not possible. Love can not be penetrated – because it is a VERB. So scorpio is always dealing with creation or destruction, depending on their “chastity” or their “desire to have you”.
If he has “thought” about you sexually, then expect the destruction/illusion/deception. If he is battling himself, then expect creation. Both are important –
It is not about you or him – because love, as a force of nature, can not be used for selfish reasons. Meaning, plutonic sexual energy can not be used to fullfill one´s desires. So him saying that he accepted all consequences is either a joke – or someone who does not know himself.
Hopefully, you will find a person who brings this tender unerstanding out in you. Hopefully he will find someone, who brings this out in him. It is not easy managing this energy.
Hi again Lovemari,
I also wanted to add,that love is not HOW HE MAKES YOU FEEL. It is not your dreams with him, sensual delights, and all of that jazz.
Why? Because those are your reactions to HIS feelings, not your feelings.
Love is a relative and subjective state of being first. i.e. your perspective and YOUR POINT of VIEW. Therefore it is HOW YOU LOVE HIM BACK, and how you MAKE HIM FEEL. Your choices for him, your dreams for him – not for you!
Again, most women would become very angry at me. But the onus of FEELING LOVE… is on each one of us – separately at first.
You should not need him to feel love, as that would be attachment/illusion.
This is the result of balancing those energies in yourself first.
The result of 2 people loving eachother – literally, (NOT “expecting eachother” or “making money for eachother” or “yelling at eachother” or “needing eachother” or “decieving eachother” – you get the picture), gives the keys to that “tree of LIFE.
Pluto in this sense, is a purifying energy and “sheds” what is not necessary. However, transforming is kind of an interesting word, as what was always there can not be transformed. The energy rises and the mind and BEING become more and more apparent and visible.
So don´t wait to get lucky to find true love. Activate yourself, and don´t be mentally lazy about it. Love does not “come”. Truth is prioritized and Love is “sought out” high and low. Find this precious state of being in your first, by releasing EGO and karmic bonds. Only then, will you understand how to love someone else.
Also, as most women react to the sexual componant of Plutonic energy…
This is a very powerful energy, but as many women have slept with their (not so theirs) scorpio, a feeling that scorpio could have felt was “an energy down”.
Again, if you are into DIVONE FEMININE – and this is not something you learn on the internet – you must LIVE it. Most people think that a woman having kids, family, making money and doing daily slaughter activities, means a “lack of personal power”. I beg to differ. So, you can still continue how you are and try to embark on LOVE. However, your life, as it is now, will change, if you truly embark on it.
So – after the “one night stand”, scorpio is no longer feeling “electric and magnetized”, because he has had “release” from an initial “creative” impulse. (the diplomatic way of saying it!!!)
Creation is “the friction” before release – not the release itself. It is feeling ecstasy – and intense focus on the other person – or with GOD. Exquisite…intense…magnetizing…electric…rapturous…energy.
A look…a caress…a whisper…a movement…the passion…the memories…everything seemingly insignicant…a tiny detail…becomes intensely important.
Your man needs to feel these feelings – from you. You must hold his energy – as he is the masculine and you are the feminine.
So, I can imagine that if you take this away from Mr. scorpio, or if you do not have these feelings yourself, you will either be facing deception – or an extreme test of willpower based on virtuous behavior and self worth, as you hold on to the relationship based on a concept and not REALITY. Scorpio can do this, do not get me wrong. No one has more WILLPOWER, than Scorpio.
Both surrendering to LOVE – is the key.
…I want to express gratefulness for everything I have learned and shared here on this blog, and any good intention and help directly or indirectly from everyone. but I’m on a very different journey, and it would be best for everyone, mostly me, not to come here anymore. I wish everyone a rich journey ahead. and I wish out of respect of freedom of choice and personal path, please refrain from discussing me directly or indirectly here, thank you. It is a very unpleasant feeling when I have no intention to speak up for myself from now on. thanks.
Hi!
I welcome the opportunity to share and hope that you feel the same!
I will always want to help out. So, I´m still here for you!
Hugs,
Bella
Hi Gatubela!
Its been quite a while. Appreciate all your comments. You are great!
I am slowly moving on and been busy with work.
I am not angry with him or whatsover. It is amazing how this experience has
touch my life and realize that I am missing out somethign within myself and need to work on it.
Mr Scorpio has touch my life one way or another.
I am going for a short holiday next month on my B-day!!! 😀
I am traveling alone and maybe do some self reflection. You are right I need to find that precious state
of being me before I can even understand how to love someone else. Maybe he felt that I was not so present when he was sharing his emotions. I believe he made up his mind that I am not the one for him and fine with that. Last thing I would want is to be a man who cant see a lifetime with me. I am not too young for that 🙂
……………If he has “thought” about you sexually, then expect the destruction/illusion/deception. If he is battling himself, then expect creation. Both are important……..
As far as I remember he never brought sex as a topic in any of our conversation. I even felt like he was very careful when he talk to me. I felt like he don’t want to offend me my bringing any topic related to sex.
I think he is a great man. I wish I was more considerate of his feelings and I wish he did let me try. Wish, wish…
I know I can no longer go back and change the past.There is no starting all over again either. Our start was from the very first time we saw each other in US and we cannot change anything from the past. We both need to move on, let go, continue to sought for true love and learn from this experience. I would love to date another scorpio man though 😛
regards,
Lovemari
Hi Lovemarie,
Thank you! It has taken me awhile to feel strong enough to talk about things that I have “known” since I was 20. Understanding them and applying them and turning them into “states of being” has been part of my path. Having all choices being taken away from me, lead to the only one I could make – GOD. The universe clicked inside me when the choice was made.
Yes, well “sex” is a very alluring, pleasureable subject or a very divine one.
It is very beautiful that he was careful not to discuss it with you, but understand that Scorpio is not an open book. And there are more levels of Being, then what comes out of someone´s mouth. Those Scorpionic undercurrents also have to be understood by himself in order to find that precious state as well. For people who are into Divine Feminine, Scorpio is very open and honest – an open book that can be only be seen and comunicated through the heart centre.
So, Lovemarie, strive to be yourself and if you are interested in dealing with Scorpionic energies, learn to feel and endure the exquiste pain of the absolute divine beauty in your daily activities. Perfection in being yourself, and being alert mentally and not daydreaming on other things. Cultivate this state of being, while trying to fall into “understanding” when those emotions come up. ALL of them – as understanding is the LIGHT that Scorpio needs to be SHONE on him or her.
This is “creation”.
So, this is what I wanted to say dealing with sex – and this very important energy. There is a “clause” in this contract. You must purify yourself. These tests are very agonizing, which is why you must feel the love in your heart. Having the heart centre opened is part of the process. The result will be based on your capacity to choose and see love. Beleive me, they will come when you are at your most weakest and desperate. Choose love, everytime, and don´t choose when you are unstable. Stability will come through love.
So, don´t “wish” anything. There is more operating in this universe than what we perceive. It can seem that we are “walking on a precipice” blindly and are about to fall every moment and every second. This was my state of being for many years – walking blindly, being highly misunderstood, and only trusting the feeling love in my heart.
Remember – Scorpio does not “date” – these energies do not permit them to do this. It is always ALL or it is always NOTHING.
“Last thing I would want is to be a man who cant see a lifetime with me.”
Well, this statement is very honest and interesting Lovemarie. So I am going to say something that is hard to put into words.
The last thing we should really want…is to be in a state of “wanting”. But as soon as you “don´t want” – this can also be converted into “wanting” to “not want at all”.
It is a viscious cycle!
Therefore, a way to put an end to it, is to “understand” the deeper fear that is being said.
What is so terrible about “being with a man who can not see a life time with you?” Answer this question.
Are you strong enough to handle these things, why or why not?
Answer this one as well.
You may find the trend in your answers.
The answer for many people is “I can´t and I won´t”.
The answer for the soul seeker is “Is there Love involved? Understanding? Of me? Of others? Even a “micron” of it?. Then I can “grow it”. I am jumping in!
Yeeeehaaaawwwwww!!! Ouch. @·%&/!!!
Darn it! That hurt. But I understand now!
“Our start was from the very first time we saw each other in US and we cannot change anything from the past.”
Well yes you can! For some “food for thought” – (but not actually for being, unless you try to LIVE it) “the past” would be considered your “current state of who you both were together”. Could you define the energetic state of what you ARE together?
Can you define what energetic state is the highest and best you have ever felt. Does he bring it out AND BEYOND in you? Do you bring it out in him?
“Maybe he felt that I was not so present when he was sharing his emotions.”
hmmmmmm….those “maybes” are likely to get you questioning over what is presently “yourself”. So, instead of questioning, try to “FEEL” yourself. Goodwill, seen to the end of the path, between two people, does not leave one with questions.
It should leave them in a state of “warrior” like “gotta do it” soulful seeking, and knowing that there is work to be done. You rest (slightly), when you have the answers. A beautiful psychic dance.
Scorpio does this all before breakfast.
Hi ladies..I have a Scorpio male friend who has been flirting with me off and on for about 6 months. We dont see eachother very often because of work schedules, but when we do, its usually for breakfast. Each time we part ways, he kisses me..cheek, lips…and long hugs! He has never asked me out, and I have tried my best to include him in very small gatherings, but he never wants to go. We text and talk on the phone more than we see eachother, and sometimes he will suddenly disappear. COnversations will be running along smoothly, he will be asking me how I am, how my day was, and then POOF. GONE..for 2-3 days!
I’m a Pisces so I connect with him on a lot of levels. He recognizes that too…But what do I do? Do I just tell him I think we have amazing chemistry, or do I get away from this Scorpio???
Wow! I think this Poof then Gone for awhile is so common to scorpios lol… I can relate to your agony…This make them very mysterious…
Hi Leah,
I have been told by many that I am a bit “square” and procedure oriented, with a scientific mind and “no feelings”. Actually, my ex used this excuse in front of the judges as a way to explain my very “bad” bahavior and silence. I stayed silent in the court room, rebellious and hostile, but when I heard that, I had to work hard not to burst out laughing when he said that.
This “impression” that I present in front of other people, is very rapidly “dissolved” by scorpionic energies.
It is an ocean of “mush” in there.
I recognize my faults and I strive to heal them. If I feel that I have hurt someone or left someone with “questions”, (and this includes my ex), I will “return” and “answer” them.
Perhaps it is because I have seen the things that I have seen, and done the things I have done. But a man wanting to disappear on me, could not be considered “agonizing”. Sure, he is going to “get it” when I see him again, but the relationship and trust must be established first. (hmmmm…Maybe that lasso has other uses).
Meaning, I spend great quantities of time, ALONE, being the disorganized “slob” that I am. (Scorpios can be highly organized people – so can I, but it is not REALLY my nature. I have to work on it. But is it fun to get that “look” from them)
My life experiences have taught me that we must take a “back seat” to our ideas of importance – and learn to give and BE without expecting anything in returm.
You – being 100% self aware of it, allowed him to kiss you on the lips – and did not “clarify” this with him. A man kisses me, and the relationship has been more than clarified, probably with a bit of “blood” on the contract. Otherwise, it is Alaska, the north pole, the south pole and anything else that is “ice cold”, plus cat scratches all over the place. My blood burns. I explode. I don´t really make a drama over it.
Am I too “harsh” and not very fun?
Scorpionic energy can be alluring – but your sense of values and connection to yourself have to be stronger – MUCH stronger than your connection to HIM or anyone else. If they are not, then you are not yourself. Actually, you will be unstable, with many different “personalities”. Meaning, today it was alright for him to kiss you. But tomorrow, you may permit the feeling of “anger” come in, and feel “taken advantage of” etc. The next day, you will feel other things. All of them will put you into that viscious cycle of mental imprisonment. The mind can not get you out of this one – only the spirit can.
And Scorpio KNOWS it.
Hi all,
So much to read. I have been dating a Scorpion man now for 2month. we have seen each other most weekends. he has gave me the impression that he is very much into me. he has taken his time to show affection in public and started just last weekend. last weekend seemed to progress quite a lot. I met his sister. we always have passionate sex but last weekend it was taken to a higher level almost like there were some feelings there. I am very into him. I love spending time with him. we chill we laugh we party everything is cool… but i am seeing this cold side to him and I dont like it. I like to know where I stand and right now I just dont. so i am backing off and letting him come to me… see what happens i guess… watch this space. (virgo female)
Scorpio man… You don’t really know how is a Scorpio man is until you meet one. In my experience, he is unlike any other man I’ve encountered throughout my life. I have never encountered a guy who has strong willpower as him. He chased and chased and chased and chased me. Being a stubborn Taurus that I am, with Aries moon and Virgo rising; I gave him a hard time to catch me.
When I thought I finally got rid of him after 2 years of being away, he manages to find way to get my attention. When I started to get to know him I was blown away how amazing this person is. I can talk to him for hours without getting bored, I can let myself go and be silly without feeling embarrass. Very intelligent and mature. At his age 29 I think, he thinks far beyond his age. He knows how to make me tick and sweep me off my feet.
He is the only man I allowed to get away with cheesy lines and romance without getting a slap 🙂
But what really amazes me is, he made a tremendous effort to chase me, showed that he is really into me and takes my emotions to many places. But then, he is the one testing me instead of me testing him if he is worthy enough for my commitment well which is the common practice between a boy and girl courtship. For this Scorpio man, it is the other way around; he is courting me and testing me at the same time. And the final decision has to be made by him if we can make it through or not. It’s mind blowing isn’t it? He is in total control of the situation. I remember I used to tell my friends, I would love to have a guy who can transform me into a tamed bull , control me but treats me like a baby and pamper me. Being the eldest and breadwinner of the family I’ve always been the one in control and make decisions. I am tired of that role. Now, I have to be careful of what to wish for.
I think the way to handle them is not only to win their trust but also to win their respect. You need to know yourself very well and know how to stand in what you believe in. They have a very strong personality and they need someone with strong personality too who can stand on their ground as well.
I remember once, when he told me he is going to Vegas with his buddies for a bachelor party. I told him, hmmm… good for you, you will definitely find a girlfriend there (though am just being jealous). He said, yah, it is easy to get a girlfriend there from brunette to blonde etc. You can get from 300 bucks to 10 bucks as the sun comes up but am not really interested.. as they are VERY EASY TO GET! So, as much as possible, try not to get physical to any man not only to Scorpio man unless you are sure he is the right one and if the love is there. Also try not to let him get away if they do something wrong, ask him and get into the bottom of the issue. I think that is one way to win their respect.
I remember he said, I like to chase and chase… I laugh my head off every time he remembers how I ran away from him when he used to catch me for a talk or arrange a date with me. I find that he enjoyed it. Lol! I told him, I’m sorry if I used to give you a hard time. He said, No you just did what other girls are supposed to do. I am not saying that you need to play hard to get but at least try to show them that you know how to protect yourself and that they have work to do to win your trust as well.
Be totally upfront and honest to them though, because when they release that vengeful sting it will truly left you numb for days or months. Trust me I had my fair share of that poisonous sting.
Just a thought, Girls should meet a good scorpio man at least once in their life. These guys have a way of touching people’s life one way or another. It depends on how you interpret the experience.
I miss him so much…
…. and I wonder if I ever cross his mind… for me it happens all the time… (Singing “I need you now” by lady A ;-( )
Hi Lovemarie,
“…And the final decision has to be made by him if we can make it through or not…”
Well, there is another option. Sometimes a girl has to get permission from the SOURCE. Otherwise, it can not be done.
haha. good advise.
Mine was meant to be spending this weekend with me… gave me that impression. so when i text to conifirm…’am i seeing you this weekend?’ he said, ‘aye, if im not going camping’ i told hiim ‘thats fine i will make my own arrangements. i’m not hanging around for you to decide what your doing. sorry if i sound abrupt… but thats how it is’ he didnt text back. so today i text him acting normal. he has been normal back.
i really like him. but i am not hanging around for any man an Aries had me doing that. one minute coming the next a change of plan… well this girl doesnt put up with it anymore. if you are seeing me then dont make other arrangements its rude!!!!
haahaha i did think maybe i had screwed up though.. i was kinda gutted but then just thought… what will be will be
“i really like him. but i am not hanging around for any man an Aries had me doing that. one minute coming the next a change of plan… well this girl doesnt put up with it anymore. if you are seeing me then dont make other arrangements its rude!!!!”
True love does not “make arrangements”. Due to the powerful energies wanting TO BE, time is not actually relevant.
The state of “LOVING” has to be in you. I can see that it is not, based on the impatience shown in your comment, perhaps with a bit of pain due to a past experience.
These “emotions” actually are “blocking” a more “better” state of being.
How can I explain that if you wish to see “what you do not presently know”, you must “watch” your behavior, and evaluate whether or not it contributes to WHO you ARE?
If you are alright with being “impatient” and “intolerant”, and having them as characteristics, then this is fine. Scorpio only brings out, what you have to begin with. He is not doing this to you. He may be reacting to you, but your impatience and intolerance was ALWAYS there in the first place. Are you aware that others can perceive it as well?
Again, if you perceive that the REAL reason is based on the fact that there is no REAL opportunity for you, based on a more nobler foundation for decision making, then I 100% support you. However, deciding the “fate” of a person based on impatience, pain and intolerance, is much akin to condemnming a person for “being who they are, with the imperfections that they have.
Make your decisions based on understanding and gentleness for yourself and for others.
This is not a “weak” state of being.
It is a peaceful way (with a lot of personal warrior battles as you struggle to do this) to see the souls of both you and him, to the highest and best resolution of this conflict.
I am not in love with this person. we are dating and have been for 2 month taking things slow. he lives 1hr away from me and I see him on a weekend. this is sometimes one night sometimes two depending on what we both have planned.
I do however have plenty of love inside of me so please don’t judge from one comment.
Yes you are right previous experiences have taught me to protect myself from getting hurt. I agree at time this can make me a little nervous and react too soon.
To me if a person says they are meeting you then they should not go and change their plans. Also I am not going to wait for someone to decide if they want to see me if their plans don’t follow through.
This is not in order to judge him. if he wants to spend time with his friends then that is fine I have no issue but I don’t like being left hanging.
spending time is with someone is a mutual want. It is not up to one person to decide when this is.
when one has children and needs to get them cared for then it is not possible for one to make a spontaneous decision. My responsibilities lie with my children. so sorry but a fully spontaneous relationship does not work. the way you get round it is not to make plans on what you are going to do when you are together.
It not about him or me not being ourselves or relaxed. its about respect and understanding. I am not the type of person to make arrangements then to say actually now i might be doing something else but if I dont end up doing that then I will see you after all.
I can understand what you are saying in some of your point are very spot on. However I am a very understanding and tolerant person but part of respecting yourself is to be able to protect yourself. I am worth a lot more than getting messed about. all I am saying is that with mutual respect and understanding of what some might have to do in order to fulfil plans should be considered.
I am not a novice on relationships. I was with the same partner for 10yrs married for 7 until he died in 07. I am unfamiliar with dating. I am not unfamiliar with myself. I am high on values morals and respect. I have also spent the past 3yrs discovering who I am again. I have had help obviously to get where i am today both spiritual and non spiritual. I am very happy to let people be who they are. to learn and gain experience from others. But a big part of ‘LOVING’ is respect.
I hope I make some sense.
thank you for your advise and your words they have gave me something to think about and something to look to and explore.
sending you lightm love and happiness
“…. Yes you are right previous experiences have taught me to protect myself from getting hurt…”
Attention all Bunnies.
You’re supposed to get hurt. Why are women so blind to that. That is what life means. Allow it. Feel all of it. Submit your tender… very tender ego, and cease control of men (or little boys because they give away their power… which many women crave to feel safe) and Shed your foibles. Shed your skin. Transform through the realism of the experience. Allow the felt realism to plunge your depths. Face your bunny fears one jolt at a time.
Surrender)… you’ll love it;)
hahahaha BUNNIES!!!
Well everyone gets hurt of course they do I will continue to get hurt throughout life and thats how we learn. However through natural self survival every time it happens the wall gets bigger. Pluto I am not sure how much you have been hurt in the past and what type of hurt you have incurred. all I can go off is my own experience. The loss of my husband the father of my children crippled me. it tore my life apart. I have never felt pain like it. Until this point I didn’t know what heartache was! I was unaware that ones heart can physically ache, hurt the pain is unreal. ones life is turned upside down you have to learn to live again by yourself. you have to pick yourself back up. people use many different sources to help them get through this. I thought I had fell in love. in the mist of my grief I believed a man had been sent to me by my husband I craved love so bad I was needy, hurting I was in a dark pit I wanted the light of love so \I went with it freely. that ended up me getting conned out of £75000 that was meant to be my childrens future. I was taken advantage of by a man and my accounts were cleaned out. after that I was close to a nervous break down. I got help to get me through things. I have had a couple of great relationships since just short ones but ones were nothing really has gone wrong other than we decided it wasnt going well.
Its not about being in control of a man. I dont want control of a man. I am a Virgo and I love a man who is strong and can take control of a situation. but what I dont want is someone to take advantage.
I made my comment on this page because as I was reading everyone seemed to be under the same situation their scorpion man was hot and cold as mine is. I havent dated a Scorpion man before so I was intrigued to read all of the above. I found it interesting. I was basically putting down my own situation.
he is in fact still texting me 27/7. he is always telling me to be open I have been. I am me. he is he. and no one is perfect. a relationship is based on communication. I’m not asking him not to go on a trip I am purely asking for communication consideration at this point in our journey. I dont know if this will turn into love. it may be another journey of learning and self development and that is fine. because we both would have had fun and enjoyed each others company.
Please dont judge people. ask why people behave in these ways or have these needs. I am not that neeedy and I think the little things I do ask for do not take away a persons independence. any relationship works both ways. if one does not say how they feel how can the other possibly know. maybe sometime I say things wrong and for that I have to take responsibility and learn from. Life is all about learning and growing its a journey to the next in where i believe souls will develop onto a higher level!
“… if one does not say how they feel how can the other possibly know…”
Peer into our eyes. You will feel a soul that is limitless.
‘Saying’ doesn’t mean love. Knowing love is beyond intellect and logic. That knowing is a communication past words.;)
Only the small, very small human intellect is “judgemental”.
Best hopes to you;)
Hi Gatubela . Thank you for your input on the Scorpio. I do see your points, and so at this point in time, I plan on coming clean with him when I see him. I have nothing to lose, and I really do hope he feels the same for me. It would be a wonderful match up. If he doesnt feel the same way, I am prepared…box of tissues and the Hallmark channel. Kidding. I would rather have his amazing friendship in my life than not at all. Wish me luck!
If you FEEL that in your heart, then do it.
Be true to yourself – FIRST.
The right verbs follow after that.
New quote for the day, week, month, year, lifetime, whatever-
” Make the most of what it’s not”
In order to “see” and “grow” the seed of WHAT it IS.
Hi sddixy,
“When one has children and needs to get them cared for then it is not possible for one to make a spontaneous decision. My responsibilities lie with my children. so sorry but a fully spontaneous relationship does not work.”
I was not judging you – I did indicate that it was based on your comment. These forums do have a tendency to be a bit “blinkered” on the straight and narrow. Thank you for deciding to share.
I hear you!
Yes, I have seen how it is when women have been desperate for love, while in pain. A girlfriend of mine, once her marriage ended, also was left in this state.
I had a different reaction, than most women would, as I do not actually “shy” away from big ouchies. A moment of truth is much better and is the best remedy.
I can only relate my experiences, as I know that they are different from yours. But perhaps they can have more use, then those “lessons” learnt by me and the value that they have added to my life.
My marriage did not end because I could not take the pain or violence anymore. My marriage vows were sacred for me. While my husband continued “violating” them, in the most terrible ways.
I learnt to take the pain and negative energies that were floating around and transcend it, to the best of my most humble ability.
I took the energies, depolarized them through depolarizing myself and CREATED. Meaning, I can perceive “seeds” of soulful being, within the “death” of it all. Pain is part of the process, but it is NOT the process.
People usually stop at a “part” of this process, and can not see it to the END.
But we all intrinsically KNOW that there is something “wrong” with the way “things” are.
Graphically speaking, I usually “nose around” people´s EGO and search for these seeds. If I see them, I hold them close to my heart – and I do not let go. I can be VERY STUBBORN about this. It is one of my imperfections.
Therefore, the path is “made” almost on a day by day basis, blindly walking and grasping – based on “love”. This is my internal state of being, and has nothing to do with how scorpio makes me feel.
Pain is the “obstacle” or the “destractor” to what I know is beyond the EGO (mine or anyone else´s). So, it is best to NEVER make a decision with a consequent VERB based on pain or any negative emotion.
Understanding, leading to compassion, leading to a unversal love, has been the best recipe, so far, as we are all on “the path”, but are in different stages or tributaries of it.
Seeing the whole helps in me maintaining a gentle state of being. But I know that it is not easy.
If there is TOO much EGO, then a relationship is not possible. But I can still LOVE. Other people´s ego, CAN NOT take that away from me. I refuse, until there is a better state of being for me. Then I would have to receive THOSE SEEDS.
However, some Scorpios decide to “swoop” at inoportune moments. I stick my toungue out at them. (phhhhttttt!!!)
This does add a bit of spontaneity in my being, even with the kids.
Hey,
Such beautiful words, Thank you. You have once again gave me something to think about.
I have spoke to him about how I felt. told him I don’t like being dropped after he had made arrangements with me… but I am over it now.
I think half of my problem is that I am paranoid. I need to learn to trust again.
I think sometimes I scare people to because I am very passionate, I don’t play games nor do I leave people hanging.
I guess it all comes down to the good old saying… ‘treat people how you wish to be treated’.
You are obviously a strong inspirational woman. I am so glad you found the strength to move away from something that made you so unhappy and found a way to feel more complete.
much love to you x
Energetically speaking, when dealing with scorpionic energies “how you wish to be treated” will fall apart. Scorpio will do what they do. It is inevitable.
It is more, “how you choose to manage the energy” of the “swoop”.
Once the energetic effect of the swoop is over, and the storm has been absorbed and dealt with, what is there?
Are you still able to hold him in your heart after the magnetic effect of this energy has run it course?
Then there is “Post-swoop” syndrome.
Does Scorpio value someone who does not “bend” even to their very powerful energies? There is always someone “stronger” than they are anyways. This must be at the back of their minds.
Therefore, are you “something” based on BEING? Or are you something based on a “saying”?
While under the effects of this energy, are you able to “raise the frequency” by blending it with your own energy? Or do you “passively” bask in its “yummyness”? Can you work with it and channel it? Does it overpower you?
Scorpionic energies actually have to be dealt with in the “unknown”. By their very effect on you, you both KNOW whatsome of both of your UNKNOWNS entail.
These are questions that I ask myself in my efforts to LOVE and BE.
So…I SEE them.
hey Gatubela,
well its been a while since I have been on. I think things are going quite well with us actually. I am trying to deal with my issues and just ‘go with the flow’ a little more.
I don’t feel like I am in love with him yet. But there is passion amazing passion and when we are together I feel like we are on fire. He excites me so very much in more ways than one.
last Friday when I seen him we spent more time starting to open up to each other expressing one thoughts and feelings.
He has said that he does want to settle down which makes me feel better. I really don’t believe that he would still be so involved with me if he didnt like me or want to get to know me.
I am happy with how things are going and I am happy for us to be taking this slow. we have both expressed a want to do it this way and slowly let destiny take its course whatever that may be.
But I am adapting to living in the moment and he is laughing at my need to make arrangements and I think he now sees that this is me in my life and not just about him. last friday I was letting him know my plans for the next few weeks and told him if he wanted to see me then I am free these times… I am trying to be spontaneous but I guess sometimes its prior arrangements. I hope that my feelings are right to feel that I excite him as much as he excites me.
we often spend evenings on the phone chatting and laughing we even have little nicknames for each other.
like I said in previous messages thank you for your words and opinions. I have been able to take something from them. and I appreciate that.
‘Once the energetic effect of the swoop is over, and the storm has been absorbed and dealt with, what is there?’
I am not sure this swoop has ended,. I feel completely drawn to him and I think he does me that is most defiantly how it feels… its electric… i love it!!!!
‘While under the effects of this energy, are you able to “raise the frequency” by blending it with your own energy? Or do you “passively” bask in its “yummyness”? Can you work with it and channel it? Does it overpower you?’
I am a Virgo so I am adaptable. I can really be what ever he wants me to be if I am honest to myself and let my guards down which is what i am trying to do to allow me to go with it.
I also believe that our energies bounce from each other. we are compatible on all levels and I have told him without the sex and only the friendship I could be satisfied if we do not lead to more. however I have told him I do really like him and that I would like to see what may or may not happen he said he felt the same…
so I guess all is good right now in the Scorpio – Virgo romance
I hope i am reading you comments correctly.
I had to write this quick so please excuse my grammar etc
much love to everyone xx
The riddle of this song is speaking about Male Scorpionic energy sung ironically by a female Scorpio, although I doubt she wrote it.
The deeper meaning behind these lyrics capture the innate power of Consciousness Itself, harnessed within the masculine energy, and the intense transumation of sexual power (energy) originating FROM the masculine being, INTO the penetrated feminine.
This is one of the most interesting (insightful) songs I have ever heard in mainstream music.
i really agree with your statement, this song described Scorpio Male very well. Scorpio man is shockingly strong and most people couldn’t face it through all of his deep and dark encounters. I am a scorpion woman, i can understand how Scorpio Male’s feelings flows and how both destructive or constructive his mind is.Even though its hard to know it exactly and precisely, he’s between a devil or an angel or he’s neither one of them. I think Scorpio Male is like a Kresnik..
More about horoscopes;
I did a check on my astrology chart today. I found that I have Pisces moon not Aries moon.
So I have Taurus sun, Pisces Moon & Virgo rising. Weird combo. Could be a bad combo for a Scorpio man lol!
Hi Roxy,
There is an energy that flows around in this earth. It is a barrier to many creative forces and prevents them from flowering and taking form. I have hit against this barrier over and over again – but it is futile and insiduous. This fills me with incredible sadness.
The only way creation actually bursts into flower, and only then can creative forces overcome destruction and GOD be seen like a lighthouse shining to a ship arriving to port on a foggy night.
Scorpionic energy represents those “fork in the road” choices and battles that we must do and make on the threshold of the gateway to “heaven” and “hell”. It brings you straight to the midst of the powerful atomic forces of destruction (hell) or creation (heaven).
Scorpio is a Choice that is made based on sexual energy – and depending on this choice, it will be heaven…or it will be hell.
As a choice, for many Scorpios, the choice is not by the man. Only a precious few can make it. I have only seen two who are able to strive to do this.
I can only imagine that women, in the mean time, must not let them fall, lest they fall into the same deception themselves.
There is no manifestation of any creation before devastation. This includes energy within us, or energy seen outside of us on this Earth and beyond. These forces ‘Are One’ and of the Same.
The reality is human beings subconsciously choose to not understand their eternal Shadow ( devastation). They fear it. Immensely. They do not revere it.
Idealizing creation sans devastation is to emotionally, psychologically and sexually barracade oneself in ones head. Desire is the key to life. Understanding them. Knowing ones intent of every breath, feeling and vision… is a path for walking through our Shadow and the Valley of Death. One then, will emerge into the Light.
Night and Light… is again… One. Oneness.;)
Women of the world:
Ask Persephone if she ‘wanted’ her frivolous innocence back?… Ask her if she ‘wanted’ her prior existence back in her play of each day… blind to knowing anything more?
Ask her. You. Women. Femininity.
The song above says it. “… Take me… Wanna be your victim… Ready for abduction…”
Persephone enjoyed her abduction in Hades Kingdom for 6 months of the year.
She Became.
The Truth.;)
x.
Strange – I was given some pomegranite seeds this weekend. Only a few. I could not eat any more, as they were very heavy on my stomache.
Hmmmm –
Persephone probably did not want her frivolous innocence back, but contrary to the blatant desire expressed by the song, she probably was not singing the same lyrics. I guess “free will” was not an option available the Hadean dark menu.
I wonder if Hades would have been interested in a lusty wench showing her generous and voluptuous attributes in the meadow, singing with a sexy sultry vioce “Come hither Hades. Take me! Yes…abduct me!!! ”
The ending would have been different probably.
“…I wonder if Hades would have been interested in a lusty wench showing her generous and voluptuous attributes in the meadow, singing with a sexy sultry vioce “Come hither Hades. Take me! Yes…abduct me!!!…”
Hahaha…. um, no. He’s the God of Sex remember? … and Death… and Resurrection…. and Transformation… and and Salvation. Do you think he would hand over his self-wealth, his power… to the nearest raunchy fox?? LoL… He is the creator of seduction. While also being the creator of surrender. He is the gate-keeper and gaurdian of all that is Hidden in this Universe. The eternal Dark. Look up… where does the sky end?
Hades, IS the Universal Soul. The Intimate, Infinite, Personal Soul. He deciding to engage in fling with a sexy… horny vampire rabbit… would change her inner life. She’ the Receptor of life (and Death)remember??
That is the point of personal transformation. To change. To become stronger inside. Sexual power in the female most definitely excites him. An affair would get his poison ready for injection. But meaningless sex, no matter how wickedly intense or mind shattering it may be… fails to fulfill his Eternal Soul.
“…The ending would have been different probably…”
The beginning and the end are the same. Not separate. Whole. One with energy (God).
It appears little Leo has a bloaty belly from eating too many heavy seeds. Haha it could worse.
No – the persephonic bloaty belly is from those seeds that were given to her – by Hades himself. He did infuse his power into her, knowing that the only way that she could have her freedom, was to join her power and his power together. He could not give her freedom, until she had learnt all of his secrets. How precarious her journey was. I imagine that this knowledge would have kept them “joined” for eternity.
I imagine that during the first stages of her abduction, she “hated” him. He destroyed her (her ego) in order to protect those seeds of power. She probably was a bit rebellious and told Hades that “Hell” was missing some flowers, and attempted to decorate a bit. Hades, of course, said “no”. He is such a meany.
Hades does not “do” flowers, I guess.
LOL.<>
How could Hades not love her divine understanding?
na not flowers…
… instead, he’ll do a dark red wine, while in his plush deep red bedroom located in the cave. All he wants to do… is make real love. 😉
An Eagle desiring to make real love to a ground dwelling Bunny… get’s old…. and awkward… as bunnies jitter, not surrender.;)
Gatubela, do something for me. Watch a movie called ‘V for Vendetta.”
The film may be a bore to most people…yet it has many deep, powerful meanings and symbols to understand which have real meaning in this real world life. The villain played in the movie, who’s code name is “V”… is actually the manifestation or incarnation of Pluto/Hades himself on very deep, profound psychological levels.
Watch how V transforms Natalie Portmans reality of life. Observe Hades philosophy and verbs, strong verbs… as he desires change in the world he is a part of.
Let me know what you feel after seeing a couple of times.
This means that only the “whole” or “one” can emerge from Hell/Deception.
Hades will never “leave” Hell, but Persephone eventually, willingly enters and leaves. As she leaves the “known”, the “Hadean unknown” is manifested through mother “earth” energies shown by the changes of the seasons.
She needs this to “live”.
Hadean energy relies on this because “he” can not manifest it on “his” own. Leaving hell would take him out of the source of his power.
Her safe passage through heaven and hell, is based on the balance of “love” energy, her love for him and his for her. Otherwise, she (they) would have been imprisoned for ever, and Hades would have NEVER let her go. He “feasts” on destructive and negative energy. Due to her “chastity”, his feasting stops and he “must” possess her. Hence the infustion of his power into her. The keys of Freedom / balance given to Persephone, she rapidly aligns it with her “light”.
Persephone eventually learned that Hade´s intensive overwhelmingly powerful seductive
poison is powerless, when someone understands the beast, but does not want to become one.
The way out of enslavement is to become the “master” of these energies and not to be a puppet.
Therefore, Persephone had to “master” what would have enslaved her.
Hade´s choice for her was beautiful.
She taught him the purity of innocence. As her essence loved him fully. He in deep gratitude of her Surrender taught her the meaning of facing mortal fears and becoming the fairytale of inner transformation beneath the flesh. Knowing Light and Dark. Feeling Truth. They found the Symbols of Life and Death. Together One… yet still Individualized in Harmony via inevitable Conflict. Together their Divinity found the Balance of the Seasons above ground. The Balance of Spirit and Soul underground. The Transcendance of Sex in infinity. The balance of Feminine and Masculine energies in heart, mind and soul.
A Journey of discovery together. Yet immensely fulfilled Apart. Eternal.
“…Her safe passage through heaven and hell, is based on the balance of “love” energy, her love for him and his for her. Otherwise, she (they) would have been imprisoned for ever, and Hades would have NEVER let her go…”
Yes. You now understand Plutonic energy, very clearly… more than any other bunny I have ever read, felt or heard…. and that’s sayin’ something.
A Big *** Gold Star *** for you.
“…The way out of enslavement is to become the “master” of these energies and not to be a puppet…”
Yep. Spot on. “Love” in this mundane (illusion) is Loaded with puppets and puppeteers. And people are NOT AWARE of that manifestation. = Hidden.
cont…
… if they ‘are aware’ while still accept being manipulated in the throws of psycho-sexual relationship control, these people have “created” their own fate. Their spineless, weak choices have shaped them and their ‘consequent’ lives.
As Hades would put it… “They failed to Die”
Therefore, it is Hade´s “sacrifice” under the effects of Persephonian light , “chastity” and innocence, HER cosmic celestial effect on him – in HELL – that permits him to unwillingly “surrender” to infusing his poisonous power into her, rather than “feasting” on her. This becomes the “rape”, as the EGO must possess it all.
Her surrender came later, though understanding her captor and walking through his dark side.
Maybe out of his love for her, he now “accepts” a couple of flowers. They can be found in a special place – his heart. They are withered now. But everytime she leaves, she gives him a couple of fresh ones so that he remembers her, while she is gone.
A “GOD” infusing his power into a mortal, converts her into a GODDESS, but normally, the injection of this cosmic soma, is always looked upon as “EVIL” because we fear what we do not know. It is because our mental mind can not rationalize this energy. It will be like injecting “chaotic” polarized energy. Therefore, this is what our earth is currently growing and manifesting.
I can only imagine what has happened to those “foxes” that Hades was playing with, if he happened to be playing with them. They would have been consumed and imprisoned in their own negativity as a “punishment” for their lack of soul and virtue.
However, if someone is pure and never tasted the “lusty” pleasures of sex, but viewed it as a cosmic loving union, this energy has a different process, due to the harsh CONTRAST to what she knows LOVE is.
Unlike the poisonous penetration of scorpionic energy into those lusty foxes, who became “slaves” to the darkness, the “penetration” of the poison into unwilling and chaste Persephone (rape) by Hades, (who obviously is accostomed to “taking” what ever he wants), ignited her “cosmic” fire. This is the “womb” which permitted those “seeds” of power to be infused into her. Only then could she “”grow” them by balancing out the energies.
He must have known this, as he did feel “love” (unwillingly)for her as well. The abduction.
However, upon seeing that she would die in HELL (as her source of energy is LIGHT and due to her LOVE for her mother), he gave reluctantly “gave” her the keys to her freedom in the only way he knew how. Inmortality. The immaculate conception.
She now has access to the forces of “good” and “evil”, as the earth welcomes her upon her return to her mother. And Hades welcomes her, upon her loyal return to him.
The pomegranate seeds, for me, feel like the resignation of her lost innocence. During her imprisonment, she strived to not contaminate herself, as her energy requires loving emotions and life to maintain itself.
She found that her source of love was more than atomically abundant, in her heart.
Only then could she “depolarize” these energies and understand her captor and love “him”. This could be her “surrender”. Those seeds maintain her contact with Hades – as her love and compassion for him grew more and more.
The implications of this myth, for me, are overwhelming.
I wanted to tell you of the unusual love I feel for your understanding Gatubela.
I’ll be sure to honor your virtue, better than I have done in past meanie ways, beyond these words and being.
I have never read the mind of woman who gets it like you do.;)
Pluto
There is an Enormous Distinction that I would like to present and understand here.
The energy we are talking about here is certainly “No Myth”.
This energy is the immortality and magnificence of the Infinite Hidden Energy > FELT all around us and within us.
You guys wanna see Myth???… It’s very easy. Switch on your T.V. Observe human belief systems. Man-created-entertainment streams. Watch “corporate-individuality” and blind-attachment via INFLUENCE of culture. Watch MTV. Watch Movies. Watch your friends discussions at work and play. Hear about your friends new BMW. Hear about your sister-in-laws huge diamond ring. Hear the CONVERSATIONAL TOPICS at work, with friends and family on the streets. Here ‘the buzz’ of the next hottest thing. See the Posturing of people to be seen and acknowledged for their social position. Their income perception. Their cool cars. Their silk evening dresses, funny party stories and insipid broken record LANGUAGE. HEAR their Language. Their “exciting Reality of things” HAPPENING outside their minds eye, outside of their physical body. HEAR moronic Conversation. FEEL IT Everywhere. See it everyday with a thousand Pseudo friends. Be in The fast life. The “reality show” of this human existence. The dimwit race “to make alot of money” faster than our peers. And Why??.. To feel Pseudo Powerful. That is your Myth people. The mundane creations of man. Which are grasped as “reality”. Mans belief in his redundant lies. His and hers intentional actions in scrambling for power and imporatance that are in constant hypocrisy with real Integrity, Purity and Virtue.
Myth is once again the empty desire ‘of wanting’ of feeling special among our toys, friends and sex appeal. LoL. Drone minds with drone desires wanting the same drone things to survive and feel safe in this bland drone world. What is a drone? A drone in my reality is a person who is fearful (and there are millions) who are disabled by their ignorance, incapable of breaking “free” of his or her current mind/heart/soul existence. They are slaves to others Drone whims, perceptions and fears and their compounding futile illusions. Just more Myth.
Hades is a Symbol. A symbol for the energy we are incapable of knowing until we can ultimatley Transcend our “busy lives” here on planet Earth. He (this energy) Is Not evil. Evil is the very visable illusion manifested in human hate and fear. The manifestation of the tiny bubble of ego and ignorance on many man-made levels. We are witnesses to these manifestions every moment right here before us. These Myths exist all around us… they are powerfully embedded into the human brain, insidiously diseased into the heart, finding chronic human vice of the soul.
The TRUE Hades (Hidden energy) is the Pure Incarnation of Seeing (Light) in the Unseen (Our human Shadow).
Hades energy is simply not the mass human starvation for approval OUTSIDE of ones molecular body.
The immortal INTENT (DESIRE) within Hades rape of Persephone is all ‘that is not’ the belief of “evil” here on daily Earth. His rape of her is/was not of this Earth.
Which is why they entitled the song above “extra-terrestrial”. Hades is not OF our mundane culture. Nor is Persephone… if she has the bravery to feel his existence.
Those pomegranate seeds could indicate the link of the flesh to this energy.
“Flesh” normally has a sexual insinuation as usually we have “weaknesses” of the flesh. One must overcome them. I am starting to feel that it is our earthly pereceptions of “sexual energy” that is a major contribution to this cruel existance we have.
In comunications and marketting, sex is considered the only thing that really sells. Therefore, objectification and “myth” dieties are considered intrinsic motivating and deciding factors in many marketting campaigns. Our egos are lulled, blinded and seduced into this destructive enticing enslavement.
For someone who is not affected by “sexual” energy, there would be no real “need” for chaotic forces to enter his or her reality.
I guess this could be for all of our symptoms of “myth-itus”.
Persephone´s ability to “grow” and “harvest” seeds is indicative of her ability to perceive this energy, but why stop at perceiving it? It has to be brought into the light. These seeds from the unknown must be planted and harvested in the known.
All that barreness, death, desert-like deception, here in “mythlandia” makes a young “goddess” wanna feel the sun and earthly energies and go fer a romp in the meadow to pick some flowers. That is just what Hades energy needs, as the border of intense life, is intense death. The cosmic window opens and you are granted access to this wonderful energy.
Godlike virtue and purity here on earth, can open the bridge between life and death.
Even if it does get you into trouble with the growing number of men who either want to “do” you, or kill you.
“… I am starting to feel that it is our earthly pereceptions of “sexual energy” that is a major contribution to this cruel existance we have…”
Yes. The wide ranging Abuse, of Sexual Desire is Omnipresent in our world today and long before. This intangible power is very Real. It is the major ‘Origin’ for War, Pure Greed, Political & Social Power over others, Enslavement and the big one??…. Pervading FEAR.
For an extreme example. The gang rapes of helpless women and little girls in Sudan Africa. If people really want to know what Hell and Evil “is” here on Earth… take a good look at the deeds from soldiers over there victimizing, mass raping ‘for the only reason’ in that… they can. Incredibly sick, isn’t it.
The animal in man (his sexual nature) is why sexuality is real power in our tangible lives, for unspeakable evil, or for healthy good. There are many levels of sexual cruelty, or a better word would be sexual OPPRESSION within humans (mostly males) of various cultures which are “at the root” of all manifested evil. When man is destructive of his sexual nature, when he abuses the Divinity of sexual energy, he is a catalyst for fear, because he IS FEARful.
Sexual Desire is The Root. It is as old as the universe itelf. It is ‘Real Power’. It is the precursor for all Greed and Mind Control. Yet man has for millenia used this God-Given power for the cruelty and domination over others. The soldiers (males) in Sudan and in our cities are monsters. Far beneath the animals. Their atrocities, like the deeds of males from thousands of years prior, will pay their price to The Maker.
Our world, people, males, are driven by the power of their sexual proclivities. The level of or types of deed manifesting from this Desire is a broad one, based on different environments.
i feel so overwhelmed. by everything. everything.
sad. and angry. and hurt. everything. stupid people. dont like being a human being at the moment. time is ticking and im here on this planet earth. who are you what are you doing what have you got to say what do you believe in what time is it what are you doing where are you going have you got there what do you feel why do you feel it sexy sexy blah blah hello how are you what are you thinking who are you really now what do we do. houses cars things and other things more things build it up tear it down this is good that is bad this is cool that is silly you’re an idiot. we are all idiots. human beings. talk to much blah blah yada yada.stupid world and stupid men with their fear and no brain and no love and need for control and their fear and their ignorance and complete void and disconnection from what is real.with their brand names and their arrogance and over inflated egos and small penises and smelly bums.and fat people sitting in their fat cars with their fat kids and their fat wives and talking shit and eating shit and hurting animals just for a kick cos they are completely devoid of soul. i hope the animals eat them all. all the human monsters can get eaten by the animals.stuff them. yeh literally. stick them in a museum. stupid people.
OMG, so many similarities. I am a Leo and I got involved with Scorpio guys before, but my current BF (who is also happen to be a Scorpio) is matching perfectly the description above. And as strong as I am ( personality wise), I can’t get over that man. My ex before him was also a Scorpio, but for some reason there was more selfishness in him then passion and love about ppl who love him. This one is complitely opposite. Very kind, giving but COLD on public, HOT in bed 🙂 and anywhere away from public. He is a water sign and I am a fire. We both have a pride that is hard to balance sometimes becuz both wanna be in charge but I try to slow down most of the times and rationalize his behavor. Fighting with Scorpio is useless, you never win, so the only way to safe the relationshp with him is to say “Ok, You are right. I am wrong. I am sorry.” smile and act like nothing happened. Otherwise they will tear you apart. At the same time they are very understanding. If you find a way to have a conversation with him about things you mught dislike or would like to change, you gotta learn how to talk instead of arguing.
When we started dating, we had fights here and there but those fights would always end up with me crying and wanting to walk away but unable to do so becuz there’s so many good things about this man that stoped me from doing it. So, it is hard to take his stubborness sometimes, but if you know how to manage it, there will be less fights after awhile and eventualy they will stop at all. He will charm you with all the good aspects of his character and and all the disadvantages will start fading little by little.
I don’t know wether I’m gonna end up marrying this guy or breaking up in tears heart broken. But one things I can say for sure, when Scorpio feel loved, he will give it back to you triple times and you will never want to be with anyone else.
Hi Daniele,
“Fighting with Scorpio is useless, you never win, so the only way to safe the relationshp with him is to say “Ok, You are right. I am wrong. I am sorry.” smile and act like nothing happened. Otherwise they will tear you apart.”
I feel that you are correct – fighting is useless. But soulfully feeling something is not. I hope that he is able to meet your soulful needs – and not your egocentric ones. You do need to know the difference.
I would imagine that an example of this is that Scorpio requires the “unknown” from you in order to satisfy their intense need for understanding and flow. And if you are like me, we require the “bright loving light” from them. They can be very boyish and full of mars – when relaxed. That should be enough fire for your firey nature.
I have struggled to feel what exactly is “right” and “wrong” – but I can´t seem to fit myself into this way of classifying a relationship issue. It could be that I have gone through so much – but I still have my soul intact and am still hearing those angels singing.
This is what you have. It is what it will be. I feel that Scorpio does not feel that this is right or wrong, but this IS or IS NOT. Therefore, you are vulnerable or you are not. You love, or you do not. You desire, or you do not. The expressions in the known of these “seeds” of behavior, is actually irrelvant.
There are expressions in the unknown of soulful behavior, and it will be up to you to decide what just “what the heck” happened. If you are like me, you will take the time that God gave you, expand every moment to its heaven and hell extremes, live intensely and if possible, love as much as you can.
Why want to be “safe” in a relationship? You must “love” in a relationship and give as first priority. I would imagine that understanding would come through comunicating, but not under the parameter of “you are right and I am wrong” as Scorpio could not possibly be satisfied by this blatent “lack” of self-exploration of the “energetic” issue underneath the “physical expression” of our deeper psychology.
My silences regarding my perceptions of “what exactly happened” are actually self exploratory and healing, as I do not trust my mental and emotional impressions of…anything. I review my MOTIVES actually, and evaluate the QUALITY of my choices. Did I love? Can I still look at myself in the mirror and face GOD at the end of the day? The rest does not matter for me, as I can not judge anyone else on the basis of my own ignorance.
Soulful healing and crying, lessons learnt and “power” gained, is done alone, between you, what you are, what you want to be and God.
Also, if you are into this “cosmic” sexual force, it is more than just sexual.
There are laws based on the lessons that you were sent here to learn. You are imprinted with them, and it will feel “wrong” if you deviate from your path.
So, as an example, we have the “rape” of Persephone by Hades. Yes, this energy is very real. Most of the time, we do not perceive what is energetically going on in our relationships. Scorpio actually has a way of getting around this. I thank God for this, as it is the “sign” as to what will come. So, if I do not see “more” in the unknown from Scorpio, then, I know “what they currently are”.
Once the energetic “swoop” energy has run its effect, it is actually YOU who will be held accountable in front of GOD of your responses to this energy. Did you “lower your pants” or did you struggle to understand yourself. God – not MR. Scorpio, is watching you, while having that cup of tea on that “couch”.
Therefore, you really do not need to say that “IF” he feels love for you, he returns it threefold. You should have known already if he loves you as you will feel that love, much before he does, in the unknown.
If you REALLY want to get freaky, you already know the choices you would have to make, when you stood before the Lords of Karma, and they showed you 2 pathes and said “Choose”.
“Surrender” they said – to GOD, and no one else. And all will be well.
What you want most intensely, is the BIGGEST LIE that you are currently living, and it overwhelmingly pervades your whole comment.
Seek your spiritual enlightenment – FIRST. Not Mr. Scorpio.
Therefore, the incredible pain and sadness felt by someone who has a persephonic obtained balanced energy – ONE, is the LACK of soulful love, shown in the KNOWN.
Look around you –
“…Very kind, giving but COLD on public, HOT in bed…”
” The wide ranging Abuse, of Sexual Desire is Omnipresent in our world today and long before.”
“Fighting with Scorpio is useless, you never win, so the only way to safe the relationshp with him is to say “Ok, You are right. I am wrong. I am sorry.” smile and act like nothing happened. Otherwise they will tear you apart.”
“stupid world and stupid men with their fear and no brain and no love and need for control and their fear and their ignorance and complete void and disconnection from what is real”
“The mundane creations of man. Which are grasped as “reality”. Mans belief in his redundant lies. His and hers intentional actions in scrambling for power and imporatance that are in constant hypocrisy with real Integrity, Purity and Virtue.
”
The TRUE POWER of ONE energy will never be divulged to a person who does not understand how to SOULFULLY love OTHERS in the KNOWN.
In this realm, unbalanced cosmic sexual energy is actually a frail test against balanced cosmic sexual energy.
As I have mentioned before, and as can be seen in the examples above from other people in the forum, men and women either want to “jump” you (physically or mentally) or “kill you” (physically or mentally). But to someone who is able to look at another person and maintain their child-like virtue and innocence, other options are available. It is up to us to eliminate the current options that we are using and open our minds to the ones that we are not.
Therefore, everything that you are currently doing to SOLVE your problems, is actually AGAINST this energy. Can you feel your incompetence as you compare your current repetoire of “weaponry” of dealing with people and facing life against the possibility that there exists an extremely peaceful way, albeit rather painful to resolve all conflicts?
As P.Puppy has said, true power lies in sexual energy. But it must be balanced and shown in the Known and the Unknown.
The universe protects these secrets this way, as the sexual energy of enslavement and control “dissolves” in the heart of someone who truly knows how to love.
*hug* thank you : )
The being that is jojo is not here, what’s here is the energy that is jojo, the being has left the bee hive for good, the energy is here to heal the pain she senses in the air… all the tears are pearls to be treasured.
Child-like look of the Cosmo… what a beautiful and accurate way to put it, think how children love, love in its purest form. The psycho sexual energy in a being is always felt by that person, simply by how others react to it when it’s released. so a being with child-like love in his/her heart, will always start to practice in the restrain of such sexual energy within him/herself…simply because when he/she knows what others want, and knows what he/she can give, if it doesn’t line up, than the simplest solution is to eliminate the source of enticement, the practice of putting a lid on that sexuality. The more the being is aware of how that sexual energy is released, the more control the being has over it’s restrain… the Buddha is almost always abstinent, why?
There is always a simple solution to most complicated conflict, to me everything we experience is a path to truth. Never fear or be ashamed of surrender, the lesson of letting go of the mortal fear gives one the fearlessness to SEE what’s in front of them with full consciousness without the need to judge… truth is not discovered with distance, truth is discovered with interactions and relating. and the path of truth via its infinite diversity, will lead you but to the one place, knowing the truth in yourself, knowing the truth in others, without the need to judge, only with the love of acceptance, then as you draw a child-like two circles of self and other, find that interval, this is where your verb, your interaction, your relation, your realism happens, with love.
The circle of each person shifts and changes, as the want of each person would change, reality of each person would change, chances past is past…let it be. The energy that is called Persephonic here, is the energy of acceptance and love, that energy attracts Hades energy simply because we all wanted to be accepted and loved, the more the ability to accept and love exist in someone, the deeper the attraction. But to love such an energy, one must UNDERSTAND it, without understanding, is not knowing where and what shape size is the other’s circle. The biggest obstacle I’ve experienced with Hades energy is the lack of understanding that the child is in-discriminative, love given from a child to anyone on his/her path is blind to the “worthiness” of that person, a child is not judgmental, to a child another child is another child simply been of interest and alive, nothing really matters but LIFE, and INTERACTION. so, this means all the trappings that is not love really hold little or no attraction to her, because all the trapping could happen within love, but without love all that trapping is just decoration, happens outside of the interval. and within the interval, Hades’ deeds and action reaches her without exception, meaning within her line of sight, another girls’ broken heart is the stop sign that tells her she cannot put an match into the flame that burns the other girl to feel peace and joy and anything else, a child do not wish to participate in the abuse of another life in any shape or form. Those who have lived with the child-woman knows this by heart, that’s why the husband who she’s trying to leave behind saids this: you are so naive like a child, I have never seen anyone who has nothing and no plans really in place to just throw away everything she has because of “growth”. and he saids this: I wish you are like every other woman so I can just say you are a slut and move on, now I worry what you will face and who will you meet, if they can protect you. But the child like energy is a CHOICE, the more the awareness, the firmer the Choice, anything else is just distance from LOVE. It’s infinitely OK to take on the consequences of that choice, it’s the rule of chosen, acceptance of the way things are, of Cosmo.
Truth is the Cosmo, truth is not god, god is the creation of men, who in men’s need for clarity divided good from evil, heaven from hell, Cosmo is existence, in it the god-like energy of healing, loving, which is the act of to prolong life, protect what’s already continuing. in it the Hades-like energy of destruction, death, which is the act of to destroy life, in order to create something brand new. Cosmo is the acceptance of both, Cosmo acceptance of existence. Therefore lay the infinite power of choices, the choice of paths, the energy that is Cosmo is all around us, within us, offers itself in every act as a choice to be made, sometimes a choice mingles god with Hades, sometime one excludes the other, but without bravery, no one can make a choice that is their rawest truth, that reflect a choice of clarity. Pain, struggle, tears, surrender, desire…all is a road, a path to arrive before truth, before Cosmo, and chose. and every choice is our own, every consequences is our own, every emotion and feeling is our own, every fruit or barrenness we feel it first hand ourselves… chose, live our choice, and respect that of others choices. Every change is initiated within, the glory is ours, the failure is ours, the knowing is ours, the sharing is ours, within, one, whole, complete within ourselves. and then, relating with others, bond with others, respect other, love others, know what others need, know what you can give, know what you need, know what others can give, from this complete being, live the richness of life/choice without fear or guilt. Loving ourselves, finding our truth. knowing love from control, knowing our own love from our own control, knowing the energy that heal, knowing the energy that create, knowing the difference between the two, knowing …then whom to love, that freedom and choice, is completely yours, given to you as your birthright from life itself at any given moment, without a bondage to answer to anyone but yourself, choose, without fear of the past and future, or guilt of the moment. In the infinity of Cosmo, heaven and hell, past and future, exist together, now, right inside of you.
The other biggest obstacle I’ve experienced with Hades energy is the lack of understanding that the child is self-sustaining, love is self-sustaining, all it needs is awareness which happens with the child’s curious glances at every thing, the more she know, the more she can love, her inner process of love will filter every input through love and intervals within her total reality and provide the simplest actions to love, the verb, of people in her life, this means she will not participate in creating more confusions, she will tell you in the eye what she plans to do, when she talks to someone else, there is no hidden meaning to be deciphered, she is just simply interacting with someone else fully. When a child looks at the myth that is Persephone and Hades, it’s very natural for her to ask: what happens if they never found each others? what happens if she/he loves someone else? the grown up will feel the consequences and sadness, the child will go on make up a story between Persephone and Apollo, or Hades and Athena… to love and to accept, means we will all be ok, one way or the other.
And now, she simply wishes to be alone, and find her future path in solitude.
I felt a very familiar “fireplace” feeling to JoJo energy. Nice and toasty –
“…The Buddha is almost always abstinent, why?”…
Because the energy is being raised into a state of BEING – having an incredible fire which is able to dissolve all polarity.
Having child-like energy is more than a choice – it is an immense divine responsability.
I have said before, it is the key to an incredible energy and power – to legions of good (soul) and bad (ego).
Intense living brings you to the FLOW of this energy and makes you one with it. Based on your soulful foundation – and Purity, the energy is released.
Unfortunately, we do not have enough of this energy to make a difference in this world. But we can not deny that it literally could balance the known with the unknown.
The reason why this energy is not “PRESENT” is because through SEX, we seek the effect of physical “satisfaction” and “Pleasure” from the other person´s “performance” upon ourselves. Just look at how we view our sexual partners.
The very act of creation!!!
Can we be surprised about “what we are creating”, when the current manifestation that is being “sold” to us by our myth icons, darn self serving and “selfish”?
How do you feel when you don´t “get satisfaction” from your partner? Just start doing the math.
That song was interesting. Was it only my perception, or was it a bit lacking those fundamental undertones of ….hmmmmm…..
“Love”?
That song was interesting. Was it only my perception, or was it a bit lacking those fundamental undertones of ….hmmmmm…..
“Love”?
Yes it was. Great perspective. Soulful love (truth) was missing in her expression, but she knew it was …….. REAL. He made her Feel, the presence of God – pure, uncluttered, ancient sexual energy.
Welcome back the ghost of JoJo… rekindled and breathing soul.
All the lyrics in that song in essence mean the verb of, Transformation.
Real transformation from the inside-out.;)
now we are setting nice and toasty in front of the fire place, let’s talk about “change” and “creation”. : )
Hades energy, in my experience, is the voice that tells you life is not fair, hurt is unavoidable, darkness is reality, pain is born form love… all that every mother would want the child to avoid in life, but all that the child in reality need to know and learn to live a life with full colors. The Hades energy is stern father that push the child out of the door to experience it all… so, Bella, what have you lost? what I see… from the release of self-truth and pain and love and anger, is a richer person with deeper depth… you expended…as a result of your destruction. I understand the feeling of murder, as I was murdered by the butcher years ago, to this day I dislike him, eternal dislike. In your case, it feels like involuntary manslaughter, yet the intention from the Hades energy is pure, to force you to face your own truth, to bring the hidden to the open, and let you experience it yourself without the guilt to having to “make it better”. yet… a mortal need both to feel loved, the Hades energy and the child energy, so she can see truth yet feel healed, not like me, left to bleed to death with nothing but coldness…which almost took my life, literally… a child need a mother and a father. yet… this unity of both energies to achieve Cosmo love— warmth in pain and despair, tolerance of darkness in light, is not necessarily a product of earthly union, or personal love, it’s a symbol of oneness, of life and death, balance of energy. so the myth itself of Hades and Persephone is the symbol of what makes oneness… the act of Hades’ yearning and acceptance of light by offering himself and his kingdom for Persephone’s love, and the act of Persephone’s willingness to go with him to the underworld to embrace the dark-side of life, there is no rape, very simple, there is no pomegranate in hell, hell has no light to grow a pomegranate tree, so Persephone has brought the seed with her, grown the tree with her energy and consumed the pomegranate seed by her free well, life, prospering in darkness… the message is there was no trickery and force when there is real love…with the very simple presence of pomegranate seeds you see truth. but myth is myth, what myth tells us is with love, hell and heaven is the same place…within oneself, within the unity of each individual, let our dark and light unite and love, we will be whole. Because the ultimate completeness is within our own being, fearless, capable of love. and whom to love, is a complete free choice of your own, free of guilt. becasue once we achieved oneness within ourselves, we can induce change and provide healing to anyone one we chose to love earthly and personally with our permanent commitment.
This bring me to the vision of the truth of time, it’s been in me for a while but I haven’t had the right opportunity and place to share. I’ve seen the moving energy of living in the moment, meaning the energy that takes the collective whole of the past as the full input of the present and act accordingly to project an infinite future, so the energy that continue to take in the future process the current and make the collective past in a self-sustained streamline process… yet, the truth of time slowly showed to me the past the present the future exist in the same moment, meaning the past made us who we are always have an effect on who we want to be therefore effect the current act…an example would be, the butcher is looking for a girlfriend, he ask himself, should I put in my ad that I’m not looking for someone who has marriage in mind, that’s who he see himself is, a man rebellious of the idea of marriage, but he then ask himself, the true openness is to live at the moment, then why indicate what should happen in the future, isn’t it pretentious? he couldn’t convince himself what to put on the ad after all. the far reaching arms of the past—>future relationship is our inevitable reality, we know what we want to be and it effects how we decide to share ourselves, it effect how we communicate with people we relate to and finding that interval of interaction….so the meaning of truly live in the moment is the meaning of letting go of who we are… we are not here to love, we chose someone and in the living exchange and chose the act that is love, we are not here to change people, we chose someone and in the living exchanges we do not avoid facing change… we are not here to heal, we chose someone and in the living exchange we share our warmth and care freely… we are not here to create… we chose someone and in the living exchange we brave death and catch each other when we fall. so the greatest gift one person can give to the other is not growth, is not love, but the permanent commitment…in the act of choosing someone. we permanently see that person in our future, therefore we become everything to them, becasue when we come to that being we see ourselves as nothing, except our commitment to be everything, And true love is, when that commitment is returned.
hmmm… this is everything the jojo ghost wish to say and share, I wish everyone find true love once in their life time, and I love everyone cosmically and eternally.
V *peace* V
I think that example was a fine example.
I believe we are all souls travelling this world to learn and grow to then go forth and teach. Learning never ends we learn from many different sources in our lives and therefore we should listen and consider others thoughts and beliefs. One does not have to agree but one has to accept that others have a different point of view without being critical or dismissive. from what I had read (as I haven’t read all the comments) I think this was your point.
People (souls) are on different paths we all need to take something different from this life to educate in the next. most importantly is that we all have the right to live our lives free of judgement and criticism of our ‘being’
I also think that as we delve deeper into each other we see that we actually have many things in common but they can be shown differently.
I don’t think anyone is wrong or right and I don’t think wrong or right is possible in these discussions. however I do believe that people can phrase things wrong that some may take offence to as I did the first few times I commented on this. People can ask for advice and one can have an opinion however one must most defiantly not make it seem like a personal attack.
One of my favourite songs is Donovan ‘happiness runs’ and it has impacted on my life and helped in my recovery of grief.
I would like to share it with you all. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
“yet the intention from the Hades energy is pure, to force you to face your own truth, to bring the hidden to the open, and let you experience it yourself without the guilt to having to “make it better”. ”
The intention of Hades energy is for you to soulfully apply it in your life and to others. The energy can be “used”. When GOD asks of you, you must give, under ALL circumstances.
EGO battles (polar sexual energy) allow you to manipulate – seduce polar people. Those battles must be imense, as their polarity doulbles your own. The ability to heal will only come through a balanced cosmic focus. i.e. Not wanting “satisfaction” from a person. This allows you to MOVE the energy of the universe. I can not tell you how immense this energy is – but it can blow your mind out of its socket. Those mind blowing sexual encounters must be – BREATHED in and BROUGHT up to the Heart Centre and up past the head.
It is HOW you create and WHY – that creates the intense magnetic and electric forces to be stored within the body. Then, just as in the movie, the fifth element, the balanced cosmic energy joins all of the elements. The energy is released through love. Just watch the effect of it around you.
Literally, I have almost caused fires and destruction, due to the moving of the EGOs around me. For me, I can not permit myself to BOIL. I must align everything with the LIGHT and Hades energy. What happens in between (EGO) is my battle to overcome in the expression of this energy. Therefore, Between the LIGHT and Hades energy must be – compassion, understanding and love (strictness, firmness, consistency etc) are actually the KEYs to opening the portal to Hades energy. Amazing is it not? However, the EGO views these nouns as “weakness”, and shuns people who soulfully understand their world and calls them “nerds”, idiots, weak, submissive.
the act of Hades’ yearning and acceptance of light by offering himself and his kingdom for Persephone’s love, and the act of Persephone’s willingness to go with him to the underworld to embrace the dark-side of life, there is no rape, very simple, there is no pomegranate in hell, hell has no light to grow a pomegranate tree, so Persephone has brought the seed with her, grown the tree with her energy and consumed the pomegranate seed by her free well, life, prospering in darkness…
Yes…under cosmic law however. These laws are soulfully imprinted in everyone´s soul – but you can google them in order to get a feel of them. My experiences? I descend into the other person´s ego. I Remember my choices are always for “the soul” – and never for my satisfaction. My EGO becomes the “hologram” and the battle ground for those journeys back and forth into Hades. Meaning, I look at my ego for CLUEs to those TRIGGERS that surface. I prefer to feel the pain – as it permits the energy to be soulfully erradicated through understanding. Christ energy compassion obligates you to “walk” and carry the cross of yourself and the person you soulfully lend your energy to.
left to bleed to death with nothing but coldness…which almost took my life, literally
Yeah, I know how that feels.
the energy that takes the collective whole of the past as the full input of the present and act accordingly to project an infinite future, so the energy that continue to take in the future process the current and make the collective past in a self-sustained streamline process… yet, the truth of time slowly showed to me the past the present the future exist in the same moment,
We are understanding ZERO EGO now. It is all energy – and how you move it.
Those legions of angels singing – is Hades energy. Who protects this little kitty cat?
Hades himself.
Those angels that sing – are my connection to Hades energy – for “evil” or for “good” – they all sing.
hmm… life to a child is quit simple…the sexual energy and encounters and songs… it’s all…very distance to my reality, to me sex without love and bonding is meaningless, I’ve never experience that blowing out my eye socket sexual encounter, so I don’t really know the energy you describe, but I know this, with soulful love and bonding I’m open to any experience, and I’m not in a hurry for that intense sexual encounter to happen, it will happen when it’s meant to happen with the right person. so this means psyche sexual or real life flings just not who I am or what I’m interest in, I see it as a betrayal to my deep committing nature and my child-like innocence if I take part in participating in a fling with anyone. So sex never happened, what I offered was my fearlessness and openness to relate, not my panties, so the myth never happened, Persephone never met Hades, for all the key essentials of that fairytale to happen are missing as I described earlier, myth stays myth on personal and earthy terms, the two circles of two person just have no interval. But this is not to be confused with the Hades energy… embracing of truth on the Cosmo level, no matter how that truth is reveled to me, embrace truth and marvel in the discovery, therefore become not only free from the enslavement of our own vice, but also the enslavement of our own feeling of our own experience. Freedom comes within and given to ourselves by no one but ourselves.
I don’t know, I tend to look at everything the simple way.
*hugs*
: )
“…I’ve never experience that blowing out my eye socket sexual encounter, so I don’t really know the energy you describe…”
Well you should, hahaha. Those ‘experiences’ can be soulfully meaningful, give weight to emotions which you’ve never touched, when you look back in time.
It just depends if you were making love or making lust.:) Making wall thumping lust will never get a woman believing in unicorns, moonbeams and rainbows…
…says Hades. LoL
hmmmm…I understand you. But I was not insinuating anything related to a “fling”.
This is hard for me to explain my side of it. But it has to do with what I perceive as the “seeds” of what is really going on in the unknown, of our behavior.
If we perceive soul energy, even our “normal” interactions with people, leave their mark on our energetic input/output – and akasha.
Imagine, if you could perceive the “great book” as all of your interactions with people are “written down” and considered as “pending” to be “balanced out” by love.
You are mistaken if you feel that two people interacting do not leave a mark in the cosmic fabric, but since you maintain your child-like innocence, as I have strived to do, I guess that you would understand how terrible it could feel to be “disrobed and probed” by scorpionic polar masculine energy and feel their abyss simultaneously.
A good thing that for you, Hades never met Persephone. Because, in my opinion, Persephone being an innocent soul (not just mind set) could have activated cosmic law to solve her “penetration” problem. Therefore, all actions that occurred in the known would have been clearly visible and “imprinted” on her akasha for her to see. How incredible her choice was – to balance instead of destroy.
Under the right kind of light, under the love of GOD, all things can be made visible, to the person to surrenders.
sigh… I do understand your feelings *hugs*… and the slayer in me feel I want to do this, for you, for every other women who felt the same way.
*invoke the slayer power*
Pluto puppy, BELLA HATES YOUR GUTS!!! AND YOU”VE BEEN A JERK YOU KNOW IT!!! you are hereby been whacked to smithereens with a 12inch frying pan by Max the noble horse from the movie tangles, envision that for a long while and feel that hooves of justice step on you until you are flat as a pancake, and only then the door is soundly closed on the nose of your plutonian pancake with fancy flares.
Ahhh…doesn’t that feel good, now it’s time for a hug party! *bear hug and splitting smiles all around*. what’s important is we move on as stronger, fuller, all together more beautiful people! the scorpion jerks can eat your dust.
Tons of love!!!
mission completion, over and ghost out.
hahaha… This entire discussion would not have walked this path, opened a few eyes, shaken a few souls, if it were not for this… “Jerk”.
Thanks bunny. I’m glad you love it.
LoL.
“so the greatest gift one person can give to the other is not growth, is not love, but the permanent commitment…in the act of choosing someone. we permanently see that person in our future, therefore we become everything to them, becasue when we come to that being we see ourselves as nothing, except our commitment to be everything, And true love is, when that commitment is returned.
I dunno –
I was in a bad marriage, and I was absolutely committed. Everything was worth the battle in order to maintain “the something that I was” and the choices that I made. I swore an oath, did I not? Not to God, as it was not a church wedding, but to myself.
What do you do when someone tells you that they hate you for marrying them (even though he proposed to me), that everything is your fault, that the mother of his children, is insignicant and really was a “dispensable, any woman can do it if you won´t” role and that he would take them away from you and kill you if you left him?
This is the soft part of my marriage. When Police Detectives reel in shock, and tell you that they have never seen a woman suffer as much as I had due to the various ways that my husband was capable of manipulating me? He was literally like the devil incarnate – their words, not mine.
Living with potential “nothingness” of my choices, made me search myself intensely to do whatever humanly and divinely possible to save my marriage. But – you need two souls in order to stay married. It will be impossible to stay married when there is one soul, and one ego.
I saw him permantly and soulfully in my future, – as I could not be “nothing” to myself.
But I was “nothing” to him.
*hugs* it’s not our fault if we tried to love the devil and get evil deeds as return… it’s essentially important to know when we give with open heart and soul, we are beautiful…our first love is to ourselves, it’s essentially important to see who’s in front of you, and what’s offered…you are precious, when it’s so hard to leave because of our feelings/commitment hold us ransom…I understand…but the pain pass…it passes…if it doesn’t pass…feel it and express it…one day it will pass…after you get through that pain you know there is nothing you can’t get through…take one day at a time, love yourself one day at a time…don’t ever short change ourselves, we deserve as good as we give…we don’t become slaves to feelings to un-giving man, we don’t become slaves to our own wish to be all that’s good and pure…I lived a very sheltered and soft life compare to you…I whine too much… I’ve never given as you’ve given, and I’m learning to give, to recognize my own deeds and learn to step into my responsibilities…it’s a long road to become… I feel you Bella. *hugs*
Remember he took those vows also. It was a partnership and he was the one to betray them not you.
No vows say that you must commit yourself to a life of terror and no one has the right to make someone feel as I am sure your husband made you feel.
I know its different situation for me my husband died he was taken from me. However I do know that when I started moving forward I felt like I was betraying him, betraying my vows that I had made with him.
But I was doing nothing wrong and neither have you.
I believe that you are still here because you have important messages to pass on you have a lot to teach people. Maybe your role in life is to experience the worst and to help others and although it is a hard life your soul chose there is a reason for the choice. It takes a remarkable person to come through the other end and to teach others needs compassion and love. you hold these things. Each time our soul enters another life form it is going to experience new complications new problems new heartaches, new joy and laughter and new love. But this is all there for the soul to progress. Look to your soul as a developed soul an old soul.
You have been given a chance of two lives in one. Maybe one where you were not so aware of yourself and one now where you are more aware of who you are and the way you want to live your life.
Like I say my situation is different. but I try to embrace the new life I have tried to embrace the loss of my husband.
I am a different person now in the way I live my life. I still have what was already there but I have a much improved person.
I would like love to find me again and I truly believe it will but not until my soul is ready for it. I have found one love, an Aries man with a soul so colourful so beautiful, we connect like a magnet but his soul has a few things to work out. Maybe our souls could be ‘one’ some day or maybe its the ground work for another life time I am not sure. I know I will take my love for the Aries man to my grave he is one of the most amazing persons I have ever met in my whole entire life.
I pray to my angels to give you peace love and happiness. you deserve it!
xx
“This entire discussion would not have walked this path, opened a few eyes, shaken a few souls, if it were not for this… “Jerk”. ”
Have I mentioned that he was a Sag – with a Scorp rising? He is now fearlessly socializing – at my expense.
Here is a typical fight between Kitty Cat and Mr. Scorpio…
Cat: Just what do “think” you are thinking? I felt you last night – you were flying around the universe. Your movement woke me up. Soul piercing look.
Mr. S: “Uhhh…nothing”.
Boyish grin, amazing charm, eyes going all over the place, enigmatic skirting of the issue)
Cat: Calmly looking at him. Fingers tapping on the table. Silence starts to get “thick”. She´s pouncing on this one and ain´t letting it go.
“You are starting to “bubble”…” Eyebrow rises and she smiles a secret smile.
Mr. S: Eyes suddenly looking straight at mine. …silence….Two passionate universes collide.
Not one word was spoken, but his heart told Kitty Cat, just what he was doing. The words could not come out.
“Touch me”, he says to her. I can´t tell you , but I can show you.
She touches his arm, and reads the visions that come to her mind. A vision of him sitting alone in the mountains, watching the stars comes to mind. He was there, working with his energy, feeling the solitude and renewing his connection with himself and the darkness.
He then reads her energy ….but she has just read his soul.
They both smile at eachother.
And that is how I solve my arguements with Scorpio.
I want to share my love for someone with you.
This is an Aries guy I have been in love with for just over two years.
We almost had something but he scared me and he was hot and cold like the scorpio and I was struggling to deal with it.
the other week I sent him a message on fb it was totally unexpected fro us both.
I don’t know if you already know this. And in your company I have at times tried to hide my feelings for you. I think I have tried to cover them maybe not always successfully.
The truth of the matter is, is that I am in love with you and have been for two years. No matter how often I try not to think about you, I can’t seem to stop. I am drawn to you in a way that I didn’t think was possible.
You make me smile, you make me laugh, you make me look at myself in a different way. You make me question my own ideas and thoughts on life. You give me butterflies just thinking about you. You also drive me mad you have my head and emotions all over. I never know what you want from me or what you don’t want.
I am not asking you to feel the same I think I know deep down I will never have you how I want you. I got my hopes up last November that there was maybe a chance we could progress into something. You scare me! You scare me because you have power over me and when I am with you I have no control.
I have been dating someone for 2 months now and I like him. I don’t know where it will go or if it will go anywhere. I don’t know how to stop loving you and I think maybe I always will. The sex I have with him is almost like having sex with you the passion the filth 😉 you know how it drives me wild. Still through all of this he is not you.
I am sorry that you are sat reading this. I am sorry I am spurting it out on here but I never get to talk to you any more and I need you to know how I feel. I do know you don’t feel the same and I am ok with that. I know I wont ever have your heart I know you will never be in love with me. I hope that me telling you this does not ruin our friendship.
Liam, you mean so much to me – you have taught me so much about myself. you have excited me and listened to me. You have gave me strength you tell me when I am being a tit and I love and appreciate you for all of this as a friend.
I really cant believe that I am actually confessing to you in black and white that I am in love with you. Please do not think I am a bunny boiler 🙂 I would like to think you know me better than that.
It was just about time I told you what you mean to me. Since we haven’t spoke much its worse because it almost feels like I have lost you. I can cope with never holding your heart but I breaks my heart to feel so much distance between us.
I lost it back in December because I had to protect myself I couldn’t have you break my heart so I had to push you away by being the way I was. But it broke my heart still… I broke my own heart, I knew you would back off and god my heart ached for you.
I am sat here crying now like a div.
Just know I treasure every passionate moment we spent together my love for you will go to my grave with me. You are so special. I guess its just the wrong life time and maybe I will get my chance with you in another.
I hope I still get to keep you as a friend after you have read this. I am sorry once again for telling you that I love you and have for the past two years. I really really hope we can be friends.
take care Liam hopefully we will speak soon.
dixy signing out wearing her heart on her sleeve xxx
with this he did respond with a text message saying he was humbled and that he was trying to digest what I had said.
I tried to talk to him when I seen him on fb but i could tell he didnt want to. so I let him be. but then every time I saw him pop up it ached my heart.
so I wrote him a poem
Wilted
I tell you I’m in love with you, why?
Feeling the pain every time I see your name
A reminder that things will never be the same
I’ve lost you now
Never again will I feel your body caress mine
Nor will I feel your eyes move over my body
Or my skin tingle to your touch
I won’t become weak to your powers that you hold over me
Never again will you look at me with desire
My heart aches like a wounded bird wing
I have stopped flying
I have released the wounds within
I can not talk to you anymore
I wilt like a flower in a vase
The water has dried up and the sun has gone down
I need to recover
I need to nurse my thirst
I want not to hold these feelings
The feelings that are so pure for you
For now I must hide away from the sun that burns me
And discover the light in the shade
One day soon I hope to say
That I can love you without the pain
Until that day I will be in the distance
Not too far away
I will see you again soon when I’m less raw. Love you Alexander… SD xxx
I havent spoke to him since
****until today****
We are friends, I needed a shoulder. so I text him said I could really do with a friend having some problems with my son. he told me he would come on fb.
we started the chat very normal I was in floods of tears telling him what is going on. he was is normal self compassionate and understanding.
we then went to talk about other things which led us into the conversation of me declaring my love for him.
I am now going to copy and paste the conversation.
this is raw feeling. no holding back and very personal. but I do think its probably a very good example from my part as what true love is to me.
hows life treating you
is it being nice??
yeah pretty cool at the mo
bit more relaxing
thats good
i’m glad
about time!
you been to hana hana?
hahha
I went the other week with my friend
when |I came home from cuba
I still want to take you
sometime when your free
you been up this way lately?
sorry I have been such a tit lately
I have been down Darlo a couple of times lately to get my waxing done. my waxing girl has been on the cruise ships but she is back now she is the only person who wax’s me properly
lol where do you get it waxed?
you haven’t been a tit
near joe riggs
silky smooth is I hahaha
you seeing anyone
?
yeah kinda, bit complicated though. you still seeing someone?
you are always complicated
she a married woman or something
I am kinda seeing someone
but he is doing my head in
she is getting divorced
ahh right
you in love?
nobody knows we’ve been hooking up though
lol well yeah i mean its a bit crazy, I’ve liked her for 8 years!
wow
well she is a lucky lady
so you have been friends for some time then
I am glad you are finding happiness
you deserve it
and I am glad you have told me
it makes it a little easier for me to let go of you
yeah been good m8s for years
why is he doing your head in?
well I seem to attract these blokes who cant just make decisions
I am kinda feeling like i’m an alternative if he has nothing better to do
he cant break my heart though so i am ok
i dont feel like that for him
i do like him
and when we are together it is very passionate
and we have fun
can sit and talk
really a lot of what i want in a man
but we are seeing each other
not sleeping with anyone else
and today i am still waiting for him to decide if he is coming up tomorrow
I have plans regardless and he will have to just come out if he comes
but its not the point
its not hard to tell someone your coming or not
well if he really wanted to come he would have told you
or he may be really busy
can be tough
depending what we have on depends when we see each other sometimes every other week sometime one night over the weekend sometimes 2 nights
last weekend i went down his
he said to bring stuff incase i stayed down another night
it took him till 5pm in the afternoon to decide i was going home so he can go out
so I told him
all he has to do is say
i dont give a shit dont want to live in his pocket
but dont keep me hanging around like a dick for you to say ‘sarah do you mind if i go out with the lads’
but then he is very intense when we are together
more so than me
I have been struggling with my feelings for you
i know me n mark wont go anywhere its just something that is happening at the mo and it will fizzle out. how could it be more when I am thinking of you when I have sex with him
in all honesty it wouldnt surprise me if thats why i have kept it going this long. I have been seeing him for 3 months now. I reckon its just a bit of fun. he cant offer me what I need he is too hot and cold
hhhmm if you’re thinking of me during sex then that’s not too good lol
i know
thats what i was trying to say to you the other week in the inbox
dont think you know quite how bad I have got it for you
but its ok
i will get over you one day
your heart is someone elses
so i have to get a grip of myself
its better for me to know
it makes it final for me
and I am so happy for you from the bottom of my heart I am. but I am jealous of her she has what i have wanted for two yr
and i am sure you can understand that considering you have had feelings for her for 8yrs
and she was with someone else
yeah obviously you’re gonna feel like that. but you said this is helping you move on?
i will let go of you now
yeah
the hope has gone
there is none
i can do that
I know how to let go that way
not that i will stop loving you of course
and I hope we will always be close friends
but i can let go of you… obviously not instantly but it will happen
you know what they say
if you love someone then let them go
and if you have someone who makes you complete. and fills your heart with a fountain of love then thats what i want from you
your special to me and i want nothing but happiness for you
not from you
for you
i meant
well i would like that from you but erm someone else has the honour
so I will just be happy for you I guess
hahahaha
i know what you mean, its kind of you to say that i want the best for you too
you said i was part of your journey/recovery , so that was maybe based on a time frame, like if we hooked up now it might now have worked etc
nah
you are more than that
my feelings got stronger after we had spent time together here
and it wouldnt of worked because you heart was always somewhere else
you never know
10, 40 yrs down the line
we might bump into each other and share that 1st gaze again
but I will never stop loving you
ever
by me saying you are part of my recovery doesnt mean that that is all you were there for
I have had many different aspects of that
and you are the strongest
my heart aches for you now
im sat here sobbing you div
my heart aches for you like it ached for stephen
im in love with you
you were not a crush
you are n lust
you are everything I ever wanted in a partner
I feel like you make me complete
I have never been so turned on from someone
I always imagine this time when you were at mine
we were up stairs and you were on your way to the bathroom
but you stood naked we were talking
I was laying on the bed
I had such a powerful desire for you
to touch you to look at you to caress you
to feel your mind and your body
i have never felt like that about anyone
you drive me wild
and you scare me to death
you make me whole
then we have the other side of things
being around you chatting
watching corrie with you
that was sooo funny
and better than sex
I feel like you know me at times better than I know myself
omg
i have really just gone on one
and you make me do this too
just spill my bloody heart like a freak
i feel like a bloody stalker
you dont need me rambling on
are you even still there or have i bored you!!! hahaha
you have heard it all before after all
i’m here
i’m reading it! its intense
I have a lot of faults too you know, I’m not this perfect guy you have built up
well you know me
its really amazing what you have said about me though
it means a lot
you are perfect to me
no one is perfect
you have pissed me off acoup[le of times
buttttt
and a big but
you are PERFECT TO ME
when you have someone like you with all you have to offer then the bad could never out weigh the good
the recovery and journey part of you for me was the first yr
you were there for me apart from one sexual encounter
MIND BLOWING SEXUAL ENCOUNTER might i add
we talked
you were so patient with me understanding and compasionate
that was how you helped my recovery
but the 1st time i layed eyes on you i was captured
i felt like I was looking right at your soul
i know this sounds weird
but i did
your eyes so deep, warm and inviting
i wanted you
so I made it my mission to have you that night
and god I am so glad i did
you made me feel alive again
and you have continued to do so ever since
you ignite a flame inside of me
you gave me all this feeling of passion
but at the same time
a complete calmness. I trust you
i believe in you
everything you should feel when you are in love with someone
but its totally different and much more intense to what I have ever felt before
almost everyone knows i am in love with you
all my family know about you
about how you make me feel
how much I have longed for you
woah, how can i respond to this! imagine someone telling you this
hahaha
I’m not sure what to say? lol
you dont have to say anything
its fine
see that little inbox was a fraction of what I really have going on in my heart and head for you
Sir Alexander you are one in a million.
and I am so lucky to have had you in my life
so thank you
well least you’re not crying like a div like me
well least your not crying like a div like me
im not going to say any more you are safe
just remember how special you are to me
and remember the love that I feel for you
know I am always here if you ever need me
for anything
18:42
well that’s good!
and I am so so happy for you.
didn’t want you to kick off and stuff
kick off with what
or about what
what is there for me to be angry about
you’re in love
not with me
but that is no reason for me to be angry
don’t be daft
you know me better than that surely
i know but. It felt weird telling you. wanted you to know though
18:45
I appreciate you telling me
thank you
I needed to know
this is good for me
hard but good
you know what…
what?
I’m going to let you go I have punished you enough with my heart for one day. all I wanted was your shoulder about other stuff and I give you all this other crap
yeah I wanted you to vent, discuss your other problems, hope it helped having someone to hear you out
(well i know it did)
I still have my poem you wrote me so i know at one point you felt something for me
thats will do me till our next life time and then you’re mine!!!
hahaha
hehe don’t be daft
i liked that poem
I liked that poem too
it said a lot
we said a lot and shared a lot in our few months of spending time together
I liked that poem too
i’m going stop going of at you now
leave you alone
take care of yourself Liam. I love you very much and I wish you all the happiness in the world. she is a very lucky lady… make sure she knows
xxxxx
speak soon
xxxxx
well that is me laying it bare. uncovering for you all to see.
Oh crap I’m so sick I lost my voice, my nose, and my throat is on fire, bed ridden and feeling like crap, so I will keep a low profile. yes, the infinite intelligence of the heart knows truth behind every movement from everyone in sight. but the child has her face raised towards the sky, eyes focused somewhere over the clouds at a place called beautiful…what’s on the hearts of minds of wings that are about to take flight? the possibility of coming back is the last thing from a long train of things, from a soul that is freshly becoming free from bondage of all kinds…leaving is infinitely real, without the bondage of ever coming back, isn’t it the truth about leaving? otherwise it would just be an act from mind games. The heart felt all the noises: calls, answers, tears, tries, hurt…and every motives behind every sound…the heart is the luggage that the wings carry on its fly…to the child the world is very simple, the verbs are the acts the filtering process of the love in her decides to do, from the total reality that is her world, no one knows that reality but her, her complete and total truth. the Buddha is almost always abstinent, why?
to the self appointed slayers and noble steed Maxs of the world, everything reaches her heart, the tears of little Bellas of this world, of little puppies of this world, of little scorpios of this world, of little Sandras of this world, of little sun gods of this world…everything reaches her heart and soul, so the slayer would put on her war paint and slay pancakes for them, give them silent hugs in darkness, bearing her pain for them, crying secret tears for them, making jojo pancake for them… the child uses her heart and soul to tell this world, there is actually someone who gives a damn for all your pain, who would plant a seed in your heart that tells you, yes, someone would slay a dragon for you for the pure act to deliver justice, and that your cry is always heard, by someone. But, in reality, no one really gives a damn for what’s given to them freely, no one really need a child in this world, everyone only need themselves, and what they want in their realism. This world don’t really need heroes.
This is the vice of the Butcher, his deepest pain, that no matter what he did, how much he did, he would never be appreciated the way dimwits are appreciated in reality, he had thought to jump off a high rise, to use his life as a wake up call so he can deliver a message of his fight for truth, of his pain, then he realize even if he dies, the buzz would buzz for couple of days and everything will go back to the same old same, and he wouldn’t even be there to see that couple of days of ripple that was his life. so he gave up the idea. He had became mad at me, for I seem to always find peace in the injustice of it all, he ask me why I don’t feel pained by the realty that no one appreciate truth? I don’t know why I wasn’t pained by the injustice of it all, I guess I accept the Cosmic law, that the exception do not override the norm, the norm is, people dislike what hurt them, pain bring about distance and dislikes, because this is how cosmic teaches us via emotions, if pain bring about joy, the twisted result would be people would go around harm each other at age three and enjoy it. So the norm is norm, to protect the weak, the slayers of the world would have to accept that the reward for exceptions just can’t be the same as the rewards for norms. So I told the Butcher becasue he is not a chicken, why then does he want warms that chickens are giving each other, He thought I was telling him “why not let the poor eat the cake”.
You see, my sad truth is no one really understands me, not a single person that I met. So at moments that after I gave someone, indiscrimative someone, my heart and soul and ear and act, they turn around and use what I offer to them freely to their own gain and not even realize it, not even care if it’s hurting me, at these moments I just gave myself this sad smile, and told myself once again, that my reward in this Cosmo, is being me, having a noble heart and acting it. The weak do not understand me, the strong do not understand me either, the strong most time is like the Butcher, that they hadn’t found the acceptance of Cosmo laws in them, and that they measure reward the same way the norm does, that they do not embrace their exception, and find peace in it. So they don’t understand the wavelength of other exceptions send their way, the way of dutifully playing dead pancakes to the slayers so together they can wipe the tears off of little Bella’s face to serve the responsibility came with exception, to care and protect the hurt, the weak anyway we can. The uninhabited ways of caring… yeah… I have accept the fact that I am the only alien from planet 9723 on this earth, there are other aliens on earth, but they are aliens to me, and I’m alien to them.
Freedom is infinitely attractive, sitting in my bed, looking at somewhere so far so far away… everything just feels smaller, not as significant, better. The ghost has delivered its message, saved little girls in distress even if they don’t need it, loved every one with the Buddha’s abstinence, shared her knowledge… it’s time to go, fly away to the place called beautiful…
good bye everyone, I love you all more than life itself, with my heart and tears and everything… have a rich life, without me.
Hi,
Very interesting, your story. It reminds me of a choice that I had to make – the person´s soul or the person himself. The intensity of him – was actually rather a surprise. I was not expecting it at all. He came to me, during the morning, and made love to me. It moved my universe completely.
However, if I did not choose his soul, there would be death.
I choose his life – and my death.
The phoenix must fly now – to be free.
The Buddha energy is in all of us.
It is strange for me to see that this energy, or anyone who truly loves humanity, in all of its purity and light, could leave and wish everyone a great life without “it”. Actually, leaving would give great pain as the world´s suffering, under the akashic violations being duly noted down in the cosmic realm, are starting be be “racked” up and “bursting at the seams”.
What this energy would do, in my opinion, is strongly wish for everyone to have it as well. Or at least say “I am flying away, but I want you to come to!!!” Here is how…(Just read this forum dudes!)
The existence of this very TANGIBLE (not intangible) energy is available to all of us.
The slayer energy is interesting, but it would have just absorbed all of the current emotional problems of the world through it capacity to “see” it (TRUTH). Scorpionic intensity would do this as intense “world” darkness as well as intense “world” love, would be inprinted into this person´s DNA (for lack of a better word).
But the “world” does not have a vioce, because there is no LOVE.
This is why women perceive the intense pain and darkness, when dealing with scorpionic energies. She has to transform these energies to “light”. He is relieved of the darkness through the woman, as she converts their mixed powers to light and shines it to the known.
Balanced masculine(ego) and feminine (soul) Truth + Love (heart) + Light = GOD
“I have accept the fact that I am the only alien from planet 9723 on this earth, there are other aliens on earth, but they are aliens to me, and I’m alien to them.”
No.
You must begin to feel “soul” energies. I am not a Scorpio, but I can (sometimes) perceive these “deeper” energies, that go past our inner motivations and Ego. Meaning, souls talk to me. Strangely, not many people have one. They may have soulful desires, but they do not have a full incarnation of a soul.
It is also interesting that Scorpionic energies encompass the concept of aliens. Yes, I have read the faces of some Scorpios, and it is TRUE – they have been aliens in past lives. When they perceive that there is someone who is able to do more than they can, they will hand over their energy.
“…heart and soul and ear and act, they turn around and use what I offer to them freely to their own gain and not even realize it, not even care if it’s hurting me, at these moments”
No…this is not possible with this energy. If someone is truly exploring this energy for him or herself, then this is the point. There can not be a price tag on it. However, the teaching process may be step by step. Remember, one must descend to the current state of EGO, in order to teach it. The process of erradicating EGO is step by step through the natural energies that are flowing between the dynamic of the relationship.
You don´t expect GOD to come out of the skies and say…
“The answer to your problems kiddo is in LOVE!!!”. Now… on the count of 3, start loving each other!!!!
That does not work!!! Because we don´t know what love is. This is a foreign concept in this world.
“Solve yer problems without causing harm dudes!”
This does not work either.
“Once upon a time, there was a state of being called “love”, and it had the power to solve all of the world´s problems.”
This does not work either!
“You know what kids…You are all going to DIE!” I´m gonna put my wrath upon you guys and yer gonna burn”…
This does not work either, because it installs fear.
The hold of the EGO must be loosened ever so gently and lovingly, to let a bit of “light” in. The energy does the rest.
The pathway – understanding, compassion, severity, wisdom, gentleness, chastity…
By the way, the first step of kinetic energy in a relationship between a man who is interested in a woman – is the psychic (astral) penetration of the male “seed” into the woman´s womb.
It happens after he “lights the flame” in her, making her “hot” and receptive for him.
Therefore, she either has to “grow” it, or she “dies” in her own lack of divine virtue.
These energies do not require the physical act, for the “seed” to be implanted. Actually, what we call making love, is only the “physical” representation of what is REALLY going on. It looks completely different in the astral level.
And Mr. Scorpio knows that.
ha he knows nothing.
NOTHING.
sigh…the ghost has one last story on her way to her flight, she know all of you still can hear it…
There is this jail…let’s call it cruelty of life, everyone is hungry and cold, for some reason a child is offered food, not only one, but three bowl of rice, she’s so hungry, she can just grab any of it and eat it…she want it so bad, it’s her right and her due… the cruelty made it that way, that everyone else can see it, but the child cannot share that rice with them, it’s beyond other’s reach…so the child “accidentally” tripped the jailer with the tray…and all the rice are gone…she made a face, winked at everyone, and smiled.
so that night, everyone’s tummy was still grumbling…but everyone’s heart, is full.
For this act, the punishment from the jail for her is: to set her free… because you see, how can you jail someone in cruelty when there is no real cruelty in her?
so the child left, and she knows, she hasn’t really left everyone, becasue the deed is done, no matter what happened to everyone still in that jail, no matter how bad they felt hurt or wanting to hurt someone by the cruelty of life…somewhere very very very deep in their heart, they can never forget what they have seen, and that for the unfairness and pain given to them, there are also children, who would loss their rice for them and give them a wink.
You see, she has left, but she also leave behind the key to freedom from that jail, to everyone still in it.
SCORPIO MAN = MUCK.
Hi Guys,
Its been awhile…Am so excited to write here again.
Am back from my soul-searching retreat! I traveled on my B-day! I went to a place where nobody knows me, where I can be just be myself and do things I used to love doing. I broke down on the first day though. I realized how alone I was. I just let it flow and I had an honest conversation with God after a long time. It was a safe place for me to just cry, shout and let go of my emotions. That was the space I needed to evaluate my inner self, my inner resource and limitations, my relationship to God, to my family and to all the people who have been part of my life and my learning. I enjoyed the whole trip. I met new people and just do the things I used to love doing. I started singing and painting again!!!
I never felt so inspired and happy after a long time. I felt like am back to my old me before all the pains and sufferings. I used to be a very emotional girl who was so in love with love. But through natural self-survival I slowly built a wall to protect my self from being hurt but then I do not my self anymore. No emotion and fearful. That wall is slowly dissolving now.
When we spend some time with our self we learn something new. It is like spending time with a new friend by listening to your self. Knowing oneself deeply is a slow process it is not an overnight thing. It is like a road that is long and winding and one must be ready to face it. So I’ll take it as a challenge and adventure I must conquer. I believe that self discovery is the greatest discovery in this world but it won’t be easy coz life is never easy. Life has full of mysteries and surprises. It goes with the quote “You have to be wrong to learn what is right, hurt to be strong, fall to rise again, lose to try harder, and pray to overcome them all!
I don’t know what Mr Scorpio did to me but I think that was the blow I needed to wake up! It’s a shame that things didn’t work out between him and me but I have no regret. I believe God has bigger plan for me. Like he was sent to me to dissolve the wall I presented in front of the world and I go back to the real me. I am now striving to heal and learned from my mistakes.
I had a short casual chat with Mr Scorpio last week. I somehow felt that he is going through something difficult but he doesn’t want to share it. He mentioned that he got some health issues but he don’t want elaborate. I told him that if you are going through something difficult, if you have someone whom you can trust, just try to reach out and share your burden. If not, God is there, He will listen.
He said he would do. He changed the topic. Then we signed off.
I think he didn’t only retreated from me he also detached himself from his friends or maybe from his family as well. Today, I saw a message from his friend asking where he is; they couldn’t find him at all.
I feel for him. I want to join him with the death his feeling now. But I don’t know how to open his close. He doesn’t trust me. I think he trust nobody. Today I sent him a message saying that. Whatever happened between us, I am and will always be here for you… if you need a friend. Nothing has change. Please do take care of yourself.
I hope and I pray things will get better from on his side. The thing with me is once I let a person enter my heart. I can’t help but care for that person no matter what. This is something he earned from me after all the chase and hunt; even if he takes it back it will always remain in me.
By the way, I found out his whole astrology chart. I casually asked his birth timestamp during our last chat when we talked about birth dates. He’s Sun is Scorpio, Moon Scorpio, and Rising Sagittarius. He’s moon is in Scorpio as well!!!! DAMN! I SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS BEFORE! ☺
No – but the abyss is not only in the dark, it can also be in the light.
Meaning, normally we associate enslavement of EGO as our “valley of death”.
But another abyss also exists – the “valley of life” and one must also learn how to walk it as well.
It is based on polarizing yourself to love.
The soul has suffered greatly due to impotence and lack of JUSTICE.
Justice – is possible, once you master these two “valleys”.
The valley of life – is finding the light in the dark, but not through pain.
It is an abyss, and it is not for the faint of heart.
Therefore, if you do not feel love in your heart, don´t bother falling into this one.
If you can not pick yourself up after feeling “bad” and struggle to polarize yourself to love, don´t go down.
You must be absolutely confident in your ability to love and not loose this feeling in your heart. It must be more powerful than yourself.
Walking blindly into the abyss of love – can also be a very terrifying experience, as both the forces of creation and destruction begin to work simultaneously.
Perhaps someone can do more with this energy than I can – as I used to use it to serve people and make the world a better place.
But the law is very strict, as you must do all things that you do, soulfully well in your life.
Therefore, love yourself, soulfully well first and keep that Christ energy in your heart. If you can not do this, then this path is not for you.
Rational explanations of someone else´s behavior will fail, as another law begins to surface.
Do not rely on anything that you have currently done, in order to obtain an explanation, when dealing with someone who has walked both valleys.
Did he not know the information that those “seeds” contained?
She already knows what he is capable of. Perhaps he does not.
LOL!
of course it’s not real, I said it was a story…a world the child wanted to live in, she would have lived in this fantasy if she were her old self, but she’s not, so she sees realities in lies, intentions, and motives, it hurts her and makes her want to give up living… but she won’t, the darkness is already in her, the world is already in her, she already lived here, but just couldn’t see it before. She sees the puppeteers and it breaks her heart, she sees the users, liars, cheaters and it breaks her heart even more becasue she still want to maintain her innocence, so she will…. and her fate, the fate of a child without protection in realism… is either loss of innocence, or death. and she knows how she maintained her innocence all these years, whom she owes her life to, and it breaks her heart to know she cannot repay that protection the way she wanted to … she sees the regret of a undeveloped pomegranate seed, sees the pain of digging the root out of a dead tree, sees the regret of not feeling something she wanted to feel. Everything, just breaks her heart… and right now, she is just been honest to her feelings.
little Bella, STOP THE LOGIC, THE GRACE, THE OBSESSION…
FEEL.
What I feel goes way, way beyond what you have just written. Perhaps the words I choose “limitted” it a bit.
It is one of the reasons that I have contributed here.
Your imperatives are interesting – but they don´t come close to what I am capable of feeling.
Words of course take away from what I was trying to convey.
I was conveying a “feeling”
it’s gloomy and raining, I didn’t sleep well last night and wasn’t having a good day, pissed to be exact, sigh, this goes as a explanation to everyone I talked to so don’t feel bad, I’m just pissed, it has nothing to do with you, sigh…that laugh was for my own naivety in a sense…but really, what I feel from you is suppressing what’s going on “inside”(self), focusing on what’s going on “outside”(others), and feeling beyond what I describe don’t go away that quickly, it makes no sense. things don’t happen outside the energy flow of the Cosmo, words don’t make it so…sigh… why are you not even expressing your dislike of me directly, instead of arguing what I say? it vibrates in the air, I would dislike me if I were you, why all these suppression? it’s ok, let it all out, I deserve it little Bella.
Be free…I give you a hint, if I were you I would say: stop calling me little Bella, it’s annoying and I don’t feel that close to you. It’s a trap I use it now because I sense the suppression in you, a technique we used to rub people the wrong way to bring out their honesty in the old times, and you are falling very nicely into it becasue you are ignoring it, it vibrates in the air, do you see? in reality, everything is ALIVE, you see it, feel it, interact with it, improvise, use everything around you to LIVE, be free, be open, be like the liquid, flow. and do you feel my intention? motivation? why am I here?
Self honesty…you don’t have to do that here, you can do it in the silence of your own dignity…express only if you find it healing. you know, in essence I’m nothing, my presence here is nothing, it’s about YOU, don’t lose sight of this important fact at this important time to you. when things or people deviate you from it, stay focused, this is how you know you have beginning to find that “self”, say it out loud is the beginning of finding that “self freedom”.
and knowing this is everywhere but not all of it, and us is everyone but not all of it, then you will see learning from all that is everywhere and relating with all that is everyone, everywhere you go.
I’m here in beautiful and beautiful sucks becasue darkness is beautiful in the eyes of Cosmo. I’m here, and nowhere… FREEDOM… feel it?
Hi JoJo,
What you should also have felt is my incredible feeling of love in my heart and faith in God.
You did not feel the incredible power in the choice in my surrender?
Now, unless you are intentionally trying to harm me – there is no reason to “react” to any of your “techniques”. But even if you were trying to harm me, I have mentioned that the Unknown “protects” me as I “love” it.
You have your freedom….And so do I –
I choose love.
death, birth, creation… what comes after it? the scorpions lives in their own world, they live with the dark until they find the light, but to them, the world essentially is DARK, the source that is their power. What happens to a child who’s world essentially is Light? what becomes of it when darkness enters her… no one knows…it’s uncharted waters…
Death happened… but life didn’t begin until she step out of her isolation and interaction begins…only via relating one find truth…only via looking one see reality with the new eye… and the world hurts her. She stands here, looking at one side, she sees Hades, she sees herself becoming that stillness and stare, looking at everything with the intents, motives screams out from every movement everyone does, she sees her cruelty in unmoving stares, knowing the world that happened to her past life is but a watermark of where reality really happens, with shadows beneath every light. the world is so unworthy of a child…she sees her reality in this direction and her comfort in that comfortable smile towards darkness and vomited, her soul violently rejected it, she doesn’t want be. Then she looked at the other side, there lay the grave of a child, on it engraved: death by a broken heart towards the world. she hate it that she knew the motivations behind everything everyone does, liars everywhere, come in all shapes and sizes, people everywhere, lies in all shapes and sizes. she hated this world she sees, so she doesn’t want to live there anymore. this picture calls her, she wants to go there, so bad, she wanted to die, she doesn’t want to exist in this cruelty…but she can’t…too much love from her reality hugs her tightly like a chain, she cannot walk towards where she wants to go.
So she struggles, she looks at the black feather scattered on her wings and screams, she wants to run away to somewhere beautiful…away from all the pain, the deceit, the betrayal…the world. She did, she finds somewhere beautiful, so fast lightning couldn’t even catch her… she sat down, she talked to travelers next to her, and beneath the polite smiles she sees the darkness under it…the darkness is in her, she sees it everywhere she goes…she cried…she want to die, there is no escape, to the Cosmo, darkness is beautiful.
She raised her hand under the sunlight, watching its vines and fragility… she reached out, she encounters nothing but lies… she cried… it brings her nothing but pain.
She sat in Beautiful… awareness decent upon her…that one’s essence do not change no matter what enters them…and that entering… is a call to it’s elimination, like the plutonians wants to kill that lie that is pure light by bring it to darkness… the child wants to unearth the source of darkness she see it so clearly everywhere and bring it to light…
She sat in beautiful and cried, she has become… the slayer of night. and it breaks her heart.
It…breaks…her heart.
I want to die.
jojo,
hey… it will be ok. you dont have to slay anymore. its not your job.rest up. i truly understand and hear your pain. everything changes. do you really want to die? you are not alone even though you feel it. that beautiful energy that you are aware of…trust it, really trust it. you can experience it if you choose. get those boundaries sorted again otherwise you will dissolve into the muck. you have the power to transcend darkness . do you realise that? nurture the child. she needs you. BE GENTLE WITH YOU. separate from the scorpion. you are not him. you need to rest, look after you, you will be ok jojo.x
“Wanting to die” is not meant in literal physical terms. That reality is for the black soul unable to willfully engulf it’s energy, the Truth, back into it’s own Shadow.
To die means to change. To change constantly as a person.
It means to give birth to ripe fruit after the seeds of old but meaningful unconscious deeds are understood. Past all the “things” self-deceptions and people that came to define us here, or represent the image of who we “thought” we are here.
Change on the cosmic level, is the divine Persephone (delicious femininty) who transforms her inner-world by virtue of a male (prince/caveman) penetrating her goodness… her light, love and limitations on seen (earth).
Once surrendering to the powers beyond her ‘known’ control… cosmic/sexual/ego dissolution & surrender sweeps her off her little feet.
Through this natural process of being injected with something powerful ‘she has become’ introduced to the ecstasy of her death, and the natural rebirth and renewal of a higher consciousness of the world both around, and most rapturously IN her.
JoJo,
Listen closely to the intelligence of your beating heart. As Umm said, trust it always. Over time, with self-awareness you can ‘Detach’ from anything you can now see and feel. Don’t fear what you feel. Acknowledge the cruelty, lust and greedy self-interest you see. But never re-act in fear to what you ‘know’.
It’s a choice, a million little ‘awake choices’ to not allow yourself to become a part of those “normal” manifestations. Afterall, all of us have been blindsided by the insidious dark in people and their intent. See them, feel them, but don’t ever let the collective parasitic deeds of this society take away your God-given divinity.
Love Pluto.
jojo are you ok? im worried about you. you dont have to say much but could you just drop a line to say you are still with us so i dont worry.
Umm…I’m OK, I won’t harm myself or others, I promise…thank you.
Today, I’m going to offer a class, called: Cosmic Truth
How do you see truth? most people seek truth through words and deeds, some people seek truth through behavior, very few knows the truth of people’s honest emotions. But today, here, I’m going to show you the way to find truth, through Cosmo.
Close your eyes, empty everything out… now, let everyone in your line of sight into your consciousness, you will see everyone is moving, they move as a reaction to their emotions, perceptions, relating, events, imaginations… everything makes a person move, becasue we are all alive. and you see the movement of everyone is essentially a dance, and you watch them, if you observe them long enough, you will see some people are dancing with synchronized steps, you will see one move, the other react… you observe this synchronization long enough, you will begin to hear the tone to which they dance… and my dear everyone, this tone is called the music of truth. this is the truth you know no words or deed or fringed emotions can alter, becasue this is the truth from everyone, the Cosmo truth, it does not form unless its nothing but the undiluted truth in this Cosmo.
You listen to this music long enough, then you start to see other people you thought weren’t in the dance actually is in the dance, becasue… they move with the music. You watch this entire dancing section, you will start to spot the skitters, or you may put it this way: liars and cheater; and you spot the rock, or you may call it this way: honest and genuine.
You close your eyes and observe this Cosmo truth, and you start to see yourself, where do you want to be? where do you want to end up?
some people see their future in hell, therefore they will make every choice on the way that will lead them to hell, and you see consistence in their choices towards that place. you will know they are this way before, and they will be this way after, because permanent change can only be achieved via death through pain and incredible bravery. as you have witness in this blog. You will see genuine and prolonged silence from the person who is actually changing. Because the way of liars and cheater is, they cannot stand their own skin, they cannot stand their own company because they don’t like themselves. that’s why they jump around all the time making choices that will lead them to hell. NO ONE Want to go to hell, they end up there because they can’t face the truth in themselves.
you see the truth in people, now ask the truth in yourself, where do you want to be, becasue, if you lack that pain and bravery, you are one of the hell binders, hell is where you will belong and end up as well.
On our incredible journey, we will encounter genuine and honest and beautiful people, they may fall in love with us, they will give you something very precious: to bask in their light and change tenderly. Do you want to take this chance? what are you doing to hold on to this chance? the Cosmo truth is, people do not wait forever, or they can be scared enough that they loss that light too… so, it’s your life, chose.
In my life, there is one man, who in 20 years never lied to my a single time. One time he confessed to me that he had once had a hooker come to his room while his traveling and he end up gave all his money to her freely and send her on her way becasue she told him her very sad life story. then he realized he had been cheated because she wouldn’t take is offer of take his room for the night and just rest, she’s in a hurry to leave, to her next customer. This event bothered him for years and eventually he confessed to me, he was bothered because she’s a hooker, and he didn’t turn her away right away instead he talked to her. This is who this man in my life is, He is this way because we met so very young, he grew up with me, my essence in him, he is in essence, me. He is also a child, very sadly waiting for me outside of the jail of Cruelty, you will notice his is the only name that doesn’t have crying littler girls attached to it, all though he has the most reason to.
Today, here, I want do something, I know he reads this blog because he dances to the music of this blog, he called me so many times this morning just say hi, he is on a trip of soul searching to Tibet.
I want kneel in front of him in this invisible crowd, and offer my deepest apology of any lies partial or brief, that I ever told him, I ask his forgiveness in tears. Although my feeling is not in place with my wants, I see him, I acknowledge this man with the heart of Gold and pay my tribute to him. He is a leo, the sun god of Apollo.
And I call this, justice served.
“you observe this synchronization long enough, you will begin to hear the tone to which they dance… and my dear everyone, this tone is called the music of truth.”
Yes – and I am glad that you mentioned this. I listen to this music and guide myself by it.
Gatubela,
I’m looking into your eyes with unwavering gaze, look into mine, what do you see? do you see my motives and intention? why am I here? what do I want from you? Do I intend to harm you? to what end?
Why out of all the things I said, you focus on what you focus on? what are you looking for in me?
Where is your “self” that’s here that is not a reaction to “me”?
Truth.
To everyone,
You are blind and deaf if you think what I said about Cosmo Truth is about what you should chose about me, I’m not in your life, I’m in my life. Chose what’s in your life. That applies to everyone who doesn’t have me in their life.
As I have said before, what I feel does go beyond what you are trying to say about me.
However, I will try clarify…and since you seem to want me to focus more – than I will do so…
“It’s a trap I use it now because I sense the suppression in you, a technique we used to rub people the wrong way to bring out their honesty in the old times, and you are falling very nicely into it becasue you are ignoring it, it vibrates in the air, do you see?”
JoJo…I have seen to much blood, suffering and death. Are you sure that the “supression” that you are feeling is actually due to my “reality” and not to your comments?
As I have said before, what you should feel vibrating in the air, is my incredible faith in God.
If you wish to use “techniques” – then go ahead. If you want to tell me that you are “not in my life” but are looking at me with an unwavering gaze…and telling me to “look into your eyes”..then go ahead.
If you want to say
“Self honesty…you don’t have to do that here, you can do it in the silence of your own dignity…express only if you find it healing”,
… and then say…
“I would dislike me if I were you, why all these suppression? it’s ok, let it all out, I deserve it little Bella. ”
and…
“Where is your “self” that’s here that is not a reaction to “me”? ”
I won´t “argue” with you. As you have mentioned – I am not in your life. I actually do have perspective, you know.
So, to answer this question…
“Why out of all the things I said, you focus on what you focus on? what are you looking for in me? ”
Freedom and love – goes both ways. So, unless someone has bad intentions towards me (and I am going to get physically hurt), the truth is, my “cosmos” will be the dominating force.
Do you want to know the reason I am afraid of dying?
Not because of death itself…but because there will be no one left to look after my children, if something happens to me.
Sorry for any misunderstanding – but as I have said so before, the last time I decided to speak my truth, I nearly got killed. Freedom, for me, is a luxery.
Actually, hot water is a luxery.
Our perspectives are just different, that is all.
“…I’m looking into your eyes with unwavering gaze, look into mine, what do you see?…”
I see a little leaf eatin’ dear.
Lol… c’mon now JoJo. I can assure you Gatubela is no threat on you. In this specific manifestation, you have conjured up ‘the irrational fear’ of her invading your life perspectives and wanting control. That’s not the Truth happening here.
The reality is she is not manipulating “your responses”.
Believe me when I tell you, that deeper control deceptions of another human being… requires “a Desirous” psychology.
Be kind. As I have had to learn my entire life and continue to learn… “I found the Enemy!!… and he is Me!!
The war inside must go on, but more peace is discovered after each inner victory. The detached “Let it Be” feeling.
okkk… you are right Pancake.
I’m letting it be.
whispering… I’m really just trying to help tho.
Bunnies, arguing isn’t the potion for any understanding if we don’t live and let live. Ironically truth is found in silence.
Observe it and feel it. Personality glitches and bickering can diminish the value of Truth (energy, not only words).
So ‘Live and Let Live’ (an Aquarian said that) is best when we ‘Let it Be’ (a Libran said that)… in felt silent energy.
JoJo feel free to explode into a tirade about me calling you a rabbit. I mean no harm and I won’t take offense if you call me everything under the Apollo Sun.
I’ll just watch and do as most Male Scorpios would do during hurricane season. I will watch and feel. Then I will wander away into my cave until the damage has been done. In our cave we find Silence.
Peace… after the nuke bomb.
Pluto,
sigh, there is actually no hurricane to you, unless you want to feel the hurricane meant for others, the speech is about what happened yesterday when I was lied to by two people, one went on screaming and yelling at me the most bizarre lies about pedophiles, the other told me the same biggest lie I’ve ever heard for as long as I can remember, may be ever. So I’m telling her/him how I know the truth, not but anyone’s damn words, or yelling of lies, that can be taken as an opportunity to deny something ever happened. can you believe it, it’s so outrageously bizarre. How can anyone have in them to lie so passionately in my face? But I guess it mean they are made for each other, their lie even match.
I live to heal, which might mean to unearth all the ugly truth people live in.
And the Rocks I’ve ever seen, beside you, is Apollo, and a boy name Benny.
oh, and I already called you a pancake, may as well relive that glory, PANCAKE!!!
😉
You can rise above any negative intent. But identifying corrupt thought is very, very, subtle.
People will lie. You must anticipate that. People will evade honesty because most people ‘are unaware’ of what Integrity IS.
People will not conform (rightly so) to any person’s idealisms if that particualr person is not ‘Leading’ by their example. Their Conscious Verb.
Let Karma take it’s course among other people who you feel have betrayed your trust. A clear spiritual journey is really about receiving (all) energy (in people) while not being OF those limited people.
Unseen baby;)
I guess it helps that I can enter another persons mind. Unfortunately I don’t have a training manual for that.
The secrets of life and death exist within us. This power is mostly abused by people who have access to it. Even I, in my lost past, abused the buried treasure and took everything, everyone and every moment for granted.
All of you are seeing what is possible when we ‘choose’ to use our gifts to benefit the world without compensation.
The human ego, even “in love” seeks some form of compensation for sharing that love. The surface only knows what it knows. The surface.
I know… it’s just that I’m sooo splitting MAD at them, I genuinely and whole heartily tried to help them anyway I can… and they give me these lies…agr! I hate these lies… people… just are so afraid all the time…
sigh, I’m sorry… not that I unearthed truth, but that I did it intentionally knowing I will cause a big uproar… the darkness in me… but, please take responsibilities of our own lies and live a truer life, as I demonstrated in my post, ask for forgiveness sincerely… and find in yourselves to forgive each other…
and I’m nobody’s baby, I’m THE SLAYER! Free as a, a , a UFO, nobody even can find me, it’s called sightings! and you are still a PANCAKE, you sucked and you know it.
“…I genuinely and whole heartily tried to help them anyway I can… and they give me these lies…agr…”
That is a self-fulfilling trap for martyrdom JoJo. You will be amazed at how many people will perceive your kindness as a weakness. They will suck your energy fearful if you fail to emotionally detach. Be objective about a person before you move in too close. Most people are terrified of closeness.
What I just shared is a big reason why many male Scorpios leave women in the dark. The energy of dysfunction building in relationships drains the God out of us, our Soul.
Be careful to help those who really don’t want your help. Your circumstance with those people can teach you a big lesson of psychological feeling what is real about your relating-dynamic, and what is forced in any given moment.
True love and help is never forced baby. That’s why I’ve emphasized the meaning of doing what is right in your soul, not “thinking” what is right. That includes a basic instinct in all kinds of relationships.
“You will be amazed at how many people will perceive your kindness as a weakness.”
Yes, this is true.
The concept of holding on to your truth, or your faith…
Or your soul…
So JoJo, Hold on to it and trust it more than anything. The valley of light, only purifies this very special gift given to you.
oh, and don’t lose sight the both of you are equally bad, betrayed each other equally, so don’t kill each other? sigh… now I’m worried. Pancake, how do you hold in when it just came out, like you don’t even catch what you are doing and it just, shooo… went out.
I think what I am now is commonly known as a lose cannon.
sigh… I have so much to learn, I’m feeling like a five year old driving a tank … in all fronts. But it takes time…
sorry.
Don’t be sorry sweetheart. Your journey is no less important than mine. Perhaps your not supposed to go subterranean on the masses, Lol.
As a mother would say to her child “you’re perfect just the way you are”… and she’s right. Your essence is always there in your heart. It is when we grow up and mesh our mothers knowing in society that life becomes challenging and complicated.
“As a mother would say to her child “you’re perfect just the way you are”… and she’s right”
I sure would have liked to have gotten to know THAT Mom! My mom never said that to me!
Uhhhh, let me see….If I recall correctly, she told me to “smarten up” or I was going to “get it”. hahahaha!
But I do tell my children that all the tools and spirit that they need to live life beautifully – has already been given to them by God, if they would just trust it.
Gatubela,
You are perfect the way you are.
“I guess it helps that I can enter another persons mind. Unfortunately I don’t have a training manual for that.”
I guess it also helps that I know when someone is entering my mind…
hmmmmm….Yup – panties still on. (whew!!!)
Close call. 😉
My mom didn’t say anything like that to me either. I didn’t have a father, physically. I didn’t have a mother, emotionally/spiritually.
No mentors. No one real person who I could say I greatly admired, trusted or wanted to follow.
My True Mentors are dead. But their incredible lives have taught me much.
Everything I stand for in life, is by virtue of my own volition.;)
…
You are perfect the way you are.
Hi Ghost of JoJo
“You are perfect the way you are.”
I looked down at myself, and I see that perhaps I could dress a bit better. Darn it – where is that Spa?! Perhaps I should not be so “quiet”. Maybe I should “yell and scream” more. But something happens to me, and my “moment” of truth hits me. I am aware of the truth – but what do I do with this incredible God given “gift”, if I have been so blessed to have it revealed to me?
I honour it with love.
The rest of my internal battles, are for me to deal with and ask for understanding for my “disalignment” with my soul. “I” am not perfect and never will be, but “I” know how perfect feels.
I have been struggling so much – that comment made me stop and smell those persephonic flowers.
It is nice that the little that you have seen of me here…is enough for you to have said that. So…thank you.
I like your “hurricanes”.
“Hurricane JoJo” is how I feel about you- because what you feel and when you say it – makes the rain fall, cleans the earth, purfies the air, and the sun comes out at the end of it all.
I will hold your comments to my heart.
“How do you hold in when it just came out, like you don’t even catch what you are doing and it just, shooo… went out.”
Yeah…the big “Ooooppppssssiiiii”!
Hmmmmm….how do you say…
“Hi Boss, I know that you are “banging” my my “dishonest” colleague, because I wouldnot go into your hotel room. The dishonesty of you both, stays in the air and I can “read” the vibrations and the dark “music” that the both of you dance to – as they have lingered, even after both of you have left the room. Strange how darkness “feeds” on eachother. Such growth of dark energy, will be the “fall” of all you have worked for. Now you are pissed at the fact that I refused to sleep with you, for my salary, for more money, more freedom or more power. Yeah, I´d rather be poor and live in a shack, than sleep with you. So no, don´t count on me to be your “biggest and best” collaborator – and propose a “professional” marriage, in order to make your business grow.”
“Hey, I know that you only helped me for the money that I am paying you. If you could milk me for more, you would not give it a moment´s thought. You have already lied to me or tried to inject blinding fuzzy wuzzyness by “sweet talking ” your blatent incompetance and lack of soulful committment and virtue to anything else but yourself and your interests – even if it means stepping over others…Just to have more money in the bank. Such slimyness should be more than apparant to anyone who has a soul – ooopppssss – Not many people do. They are just as bad in their dark hearts, as you are. You feed on their illusions of desperation and helplessness, as much as they feed on your illusions of power and the fact that you are actually a great person. But hey – Continue listening to your religious music on the streets and act all “humble” and pure, while your lies hang over you like a black cloud.”
“hmmmmm – I just said a random comment to you, and your EGO shifted and shimmered as to hide itself. It is because you have many things to hide yourself. Dishonest things – as your shame, impotence and powerless to assume soulful behavior and virtue in solving your problems, pain and sadness, tried to escape my penetrating focus on it.
So with these two examples…why have I not said anything? Because I prefer to “do” something about it. It is a choice – and it is a VERB.
God shows me the way.
Love this:
“…You feed on their illusions of desperation and helplessness, as much as they feed on your illusions of power and the fact that you are actually a great person. But hey – Continue listening to your religious music on the streets and act all “humble” and pure, while your lies hang over you like a black cloud…”
… and the beautiful Truth in this:
“hmmmmm – I just said a random comment to you, and your EGO shifted and shimmered as to hide itself. It is because you have many things to hide yourself. Dishonest things – as your shame, impotence and powerless to assume soulful behavior and virtue in solving your problems, pain and sadness, tried to escape my penetrating focus on it…”
Two great examples of Veiled, Illusory “reality” within people.
Gatubela,
I’m soooo happy!!!!!! so so happy to read what you write!!! so happy!!!! thank you Bella, may I call you Bella? I give you a big bone squeezing hug, hear the crack? yeah… that’s the way I want to do it.
I’ve been asking myself what are my motives, am I doing the right thing? I ask myself all the time since what happened with my murder years back, I stopped all slaying activities since then, I know without the ability/compassion to patch people up after you cut them, it’s nothing but murder. After my journey of self-discovery I shared on this blog, I had thought I found the ability becasue I always have the compassion, so… I started the slaying again… but what happened in the past many days made me want to stop again.
What Pluto said about be kind and let things be, and that let karma take its course on life instead of forcing it to people makes so much sense … yet not making all the sense… I was so confused.
My favorite author of all time, his name is wangxiaobo, he died so young, he has said something that I always remembered, or you may say engraved on my consciousness, about the process of entropy, which is how he feels life works, that energy has the tendency to flow from high to low, that as humanity, we tend to fall back to the comfort-zone therefore we stay forever the lowest level of our collective whole. but the only way to actually move forward is actually fight against entropy, we do things that actually gives us no reward, that we strive to move upward as a conscious choice, if enough of us is doing this, then eventually we will bring the entire level of the collective whole as humanity upward. as he put in his special way :
” In these people, you will not see the magnificent process of water flowing from high to low, apples falling downwards, wolves eating rabbits. The phenomenon you see is akin to water flowing uphill, apples flying into the sky, rabbits eating wolves. I can also say, following entropy is not enough. For instance, if everyone followed the natural course of sliding downwards, in the end, we will all certainly gather together in a place down below, crowded together like maggots in a septic tank.”
you can read some of his words here, I enjoy him so very much I want to share a little piece of him:
http://www.csua.berkeley.edu/~mrl/WangXiaoBo/WhyDoIWrite.HTM.
So, that’s what I’ve been doing… try to make most of my decisions anti entropy…but I do feel the negative side-effects of doing so, on others, on myself, I want to find peace and kindness to let things be, even Apollo said it’s not my responsibility and that I don’t have to capacity to take on everything…but…I still feel it make sense, but not all of it… Now I feel better for what I do, because of your graciousness to share what you feel inside, thank you Bella. I always admire how you fight for your reality, I know I would of died any step of the way… I know who I am in the physical world. So I know you have a very strong soul… I never doubt for one min of that fact.
The place called beautiful…
I’m here for a while now, didn’t like it at first glance, darkness lurks behind every thing that is light…hated it, hated the world where dark is never far from anything beautiful…hate the fact that… I can see it all. And then… it started to change, a place where wrong becomes right…is beautiful.
A place where choices are born of what’s right, instead of holding on to what’s wrong.
A place where deeds are result of integrity and fearlessness, rather than desire and fear.
A place where truth are revealed and deeds and consequences falls on the right shoulders.
A place where guilt disappear.
A place life becomes simple.
A place where promises are keep, but not at the expenses of real compassion.
A place where feelings are true, within the God-given freedom of heart and soul.
A place of seeing the past as past, future as future, present as present.
A place where everything is slowly lining up…with truth.
I love BEAUTIFUL, and I wish all of you can join me here.
”… In these people, you will not see the magnificent process of water flowing from high to low, apples falling downwards, wolves eating rabbits. The phenomenon you see is akin to water flowing uphill, apples flying into the sky, rabbits eating wolves. I can also say, following entropy is not enough. For instance, if everyone followed the natural course of sliding downwards, in the end, we will all certainly gather together in a place down below, crowded together like maggots in a septic tank…”
Awesome. A man after my own heart.
I might vibrate the energy of a Predator (wolves eating bunnies) YET, my willpower and desire is not of that Consciousness. Why??… I choose.
By the way, the perceptions that I described above, are actually the person´s perceptions…and not mine. You not only detect the lie, you feel the underlying emotions. Strange how people act badly, because in reality, they are ashamed.
Bueno, these are the same topics that we have already discussed elsewhere in the forum!
This is why one must maintain soulful and in “Beautiful”.
Hmmmmm –
Yes, I was aware of what you were trying to do.
Relationship physics – is a term that I have coined earlier in this forum. I was unaware that this was actually an already formed concept. I just felt it, (among other things…;) ) while I was in “Persephonelandia”.
Yes – anti-entropy, in my experience, has had better results with younger people. It means polarizing yourself in terms of what feels loving and soulful.
Yeah, I can imagine that this sounds so “Barbie” to many readers.
Oh really? You should see what happens after 15 years of stored polarized love energy is released.
Those vibrant energies that you are perceiving in the air, START TO MOVE.
This is the real reason why you must be in Beautiful. Negative energetic richochet, well give you major karmic whiplash.
My happiness for you, knows no end.
Pluto,
By no means I’m implying that what you are is anything less than what I shared… you see, the reason I love that author so much is he Accept people, not afraid of voice truth, and have nothing but compassion for humanity. I see all of the above in you too, especially when people are not “hurting you” by not recognizing all that you tried to do, to be.
The author wrote the way he wrote, becasue he sees himself as a rabbit, he sees his “fragility” in society, he was never acknowledged while he still lived…I tend to say thing about him as if he is still alive, to me he is.
But the world consist of tigers with the same kind hearts, how does a tiger keep with the up-ward flow? it can’t be the same with rabbits… and I see you demonstrate it by inner alignment of others reality and change within yourself. It’s very touching to watch, becasue the greatest manifestation of power is it’s restrain, and you have great power and you are restraining it every time you notice it otherwise. and I understand, and I hope everyone here understand that the surrender to truth in essence has dignity given to us freely by Life, that we find that truth in our own quite and dignified silence.
What I said before… is not to escape reality…but to face it…I have been escaping my reality in my physical world for a long long time, my immediate deed is to face that reality (the present), so I’m trying to do that with truth and communication. I hope you understand… I don’t know how I can deliver something that I want to say but cannot find the right words to say it.
JoJo…
I’ve told you I love you without saying it. I have shared this same passion and love with anyone who was open to this energy ‘in themselves’ first.
I cannot free (release) anyone from their own pain if they are afraid ‘of Being’ free and failing to feel that oppression in the first place. That is their choice. Not mine. Love is not to force remember?
My responsibilty as a man is to speak, hear and feel openly with compassion and conviction because I know on deep subconscious levels my deeds are backing-up my expression. That ‘knowing’ is freedom, for me.
“… becasue the greatest manifestation of power is it’s restrain…”
Oh Yes, most assuredly. One must be held responsible for ‘Who they Are’ from deep inside, manifested in outward life. This accountability is not just through “opinions” spoken on an internet blog. Opinions are not truthful if the act behind the belief in ones-self is blind to knowing that manifested opinion. Entropy.
JoJo you’ve shared pieces of your being that I have always loved, long before you wrote anything on this blog. If you could imagine my personality, my soul, it was designed by the Source for that same understanding among many, many people.
I really don’t know if my ‘Beingness’ was meant to penetrate (inject)one “fragile” Persephone in this existence. I still have much to give. That giving has given me back great meaning in my life. This focus, expansion, consciousness or whatever you want to call it… has also proven too overwhelming for one beautiful daffodil.
Thanks for those meaningful gifts.
If we were to look, hear and feel very closely at the True Measure of a man (woman) when pushed… we will/have noticed they have no basis of opinion at all.
Life experience teaches us to ask questions. The True Measure of a man or woman is afraid of the being questioned. For their Fears are telling them they don’t the answer.
‘Yes’ men and women are everywhere. Find me the man who questions others, and I will show you a Warrior Soul.
I will show you ‘a being’ who does not want the slide into maggotville. If you all were to look at earth from space, that is all you would see. You would see tiny creatures (us), moving, eating, fornicating, killing, controlling and devouring other mundane creatures… until we all die and nothing is left but ‘A New World’.
Humans will extinct all humans, eventually. I’m sure of it.
Pluto,
You god damn have no answer is becasue I just drove my son to his play date, walked for a hour or so to get the steam out a bit, and now I have to get myself fed, and 10 other things, so later tonight I have the strength and time to give it to you, you wait, I’ll give you an answer with my god damn 12 inch fraying pans for your sole pleasure of getting wracked to smithereens, again. Wait, god damn pancake, you days are numbered!!!!
Okay. And that means?…. do tell.
I may abort talking with you period if that psychosis keeps revealing it’s ugly head. I mean, I’m good with weird… and I’d like to see another male attempt to relate with you the way I have… but if you can’t calm yourself, you already know my response.;)
I should add that I was not directly talking about you. I was being Universal… ya know… earth, space, a snapshot view down on creatures… like all of ‘us’.:)
Well, welcome to the real world of people getting angry, realism, remember? I don’t really care you talk to me or not right now, I feel I’ve been wronged, it’s your choice, and you asked, you want an answer, I’m answering, how I’m answering is ME, under my current mood and choice of how to deliver that answer, deal with it, or stop talking to me, and I will DEAL with that. You don’t get to chose how I chose to present myself, no one gets that right but themselves, you chose to probe, then be prepared of what you get, just as I chose what to say to you and gotten what I get before, deal with it with grace, it’s absurd to feel otherwise.
I am calm quite a bit now, but I don’t like this calm, becasue what I want to say would be better when you FEEL that heat of anger, and know where it come from, why I chose to say the things now instead of maintain my silence on the subject, instead of this calm dispassionate delivery, it feels COLD even to myself, but I am answering, no matter what, I have endless compassion and understanding as I demonstrated again and again, but somethings also need to be said when it need to be said without guilt to have to kiss the boo boo every line. so, please, come in with a bullet proof vast, it’s not going to be a joyful experience.
Yes, you asked, but you are NOT asking the right questions, why? becasue you are AFRAID, therefore you are blind, you know, on the path of Cosmo truth, there is no conflict between you and I, no conflict at all, the only conflict is I chose not to get closer on a personal level, there are very sound reason for my choice, yet you are not asking that, you are not asking why I say I saw you and I as two person with no intervals, that question that actually is relevant to my behavior. Instead you went on assumptions about my integrity and soulfulness, am I “feeding” off people’s situation to feel great about myself, please, I know I’m a great person, can be magnificent if I chose, and will be the smartest woman you will ever have the chance to meet. I know it, it’s not confirmed by you or anyone I met here, is confirmed by EVERYONE I met and engaged regardless of their situation. You are so far off from knowing who I am, you are literally blind. becasue I am this way before, and will be after, every change happens to me, only makes me BETTER.
You so easily assume “fragile” as a weakness, have you been reading anything wangxiaobo said? or what I said? that the bravery of a rabbit eating a wolf is a sign of the rabbit’s weakness? how do you even come to the idea? we might not be powerful, but we are BRAVE, something that is lacking from you. why? a simple answer would be: a tiger is comfortable. it has no predators, it do not face the decision of whether to stay by the dinosaur’s side, or should it bit the dinosaur’s tail in the name of truth, and be afraid of the consequences, yet still do it because of FEARLESSNESS. You enemy is yourself, you rarely even get the “self” stretched, you have the grace and beauty to change when you do see these “stretch”, but you are seldom challenged, you rarely live in the reality of been AFRAID, the feelings that you face doesn’t really count, because it’s involuntary, it’s not a choice, even involuntary feelings, you chose to disguise it in “Cosmo”, you do not face it as a “MAN”. what happened in the past is past, look at your life, now, your comfort zone, you stopped realize you are living a life without challenge, you find joy in your “solitude”.
I realized this the first touch I put on your hand, you revealed it to me, clearly. But I chose not to say anything about it, because I have too many of my own inner demons to fight, and I’m not into change a man, I have a path to walk, I have expressed my good wish on your journey whole heartily…it’s not enough. and I respected what you said about do not attempt to change a man, chose if you want to stay or not. and I made my choice, yet, it’s not enough.
You ask the wrong questions, but I’m giving you the right answer, you are so easily accepting what I said about two circles having no intervals because you feel you “know” the reason, you fail to read anything I’ve written since I came back as the Cosmo energy, becasue you feel you “know” the answer, you become blind by choice. what happened as event is no way a “COSMO TRUTH” of who we are, it’s a circumstances and choice that can be easily changed, how can it be the RAWEST truth of two person that has no intervals. that Rawest truth of me is that my highest priority, or the one thing I’d rather die than live without is the my freedom of choice, it’s so essential to me, it’s like breathing, I can’t help it, it can’t be stopped even if I try to give up, when something happens, I chose, I have a complete filtering system to arrive at my decision, and I will not let anyone or anything take that right from me, nothing in the world, it can’t be done, even if it means to use my last dim to buy a mud pie and die from starvation, it’s MY CHOICE, ask Apollo and looked at his many scars from cracking skull as a result of trying to head budding my stubbornness in carry out my “unwise” choices, That’s who I AM, I do not invite people who cannot stand this stubbornness in me to endure me in his life, everything is a choice. Taking away my choice, I rather a sword drop off from the sky and cut my head off, literally.
And the only interval that CAN happen in a man and woman dynamic with my RAWEST truth, is a LOT of tolerance, LOTS of tolerance in standing by and allowing me to make and carry out my choices, in trust, in knowing I take into consideration of everything and everyone in my reality to arrive at the one course that I want to walk, even if it means great deal of patience just let it be for now. I can safely say, no one in the entire world spend more time and consideration and effort to arrive at my decision but me, who knows my whole truth but me, no one is me, and I’m no dimwit. I make mistakes, but that is my due for my choice, I pay it gladly and am prepared for any consequences. So without that tolerance, there is no interval. and the rawest truth from you… your fear, I sense it, smell it, feel it because I am intimate with fear, I know them by heart therefore I recognized them right away, because I had to fight every fear in any shape and form to be where I am today, so I know them. I know the fearful little boy who I would hug in darkness and tell him he’s perfect and kiss him tenderly on his forehead telling him everything is going to be OK, he is still afraid, but lacked somewhere so deep in the man that solitude is what the man chose to live by, embrace, and believe. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this choice, the only difference is, it makes a man who will have no tolerance. yes, we are all tolerant and fearless on principle, yet only functional tolerance is the one you Gain by experience irritation and frustration on a ongoing bases yet still tolerate it, same with fear, you have to fear to over come it. everything is GAINED, EARNED, nothing happens in thin air, nothing happens in solitude. And I was not far from the observance of your truth, you are not a tolerant man when things don’t go your way, and you don’t get your hands dirty, you stay air borne and Cosmo, that’s not the kind of love I seek with a man, no. I don’t find common ground with a man who do not put himself at risk. to me, the uplift of energy is never cut off from the source from the very earthy level, from the base, from the bottom, from getting involved…how can the collective whole gets uplifted if all we do is cut ourselves from the basics? we will just be…watching, on side lines.
There is NOTHING wrong with you chose being you, it’s the beauty and dynamics of being unique, and you grow you own beautiful pace and ways, it’s just… not what I see cross path with my truth, I would of never said these things, it needn’t be said if I weren’t feel so wronged. I still worry what I say here being taken the wrong way by the public, it’s relevant to us in a relationship dynamic, but not to be taken out of it’s context. All these harshness… it has nothing to do with jojo, she never came back, she has said to you all that she wanted and needed to say, she cannot bear these things to be said to the one man she greatly admire…but she never came back…the ghost of jojo, energy of Cosmo, she’s fearless, and guilt free.
oh, and it mean consider you have been eaten by a rabbit.
“… there is no conflict between you and I, no conflict at all, the only conflict is I chose not to get closer on a personal level..”
Ok, good. Then save your energy. Stop writing to me. Stop inflating like a hot air balloon.
Save the tizzy fits. Admit your fears to yourself and move on to another sounding board. This how you talk to people:
“…You god damn have no answer is becasue I just drove my son to his play date, walked for a hour or so to get the steam out a bit, and now I have to get myself fed, and 10 other things, so later tonight I have the strength and time to give it to you, you wait, I’ll give you an answer with my god damn 12 inch fraying pans for your sole pleasure of getting wracked to smithereens, again. Wait, god damn pancake, you days are numbered!!!!..”
And you still want to understand. Well I have. Too many times.
You speak in vain. Your insanity does not give off vibes of affection, so I’ll self-restrain… once again… and pretend that your 2 yr old tizzy fit didn’t happen.;)
I’ve said enough to you. Go reckless, careless and baby on another person. I’m done babysitting;)
Be well.
“…And I was not far from the observance of your truth, you are not a tolerant man when things don’t go your way, and you don’t get your hands dirty, you stay air borne and Cosmo, that’s not the kind of love I seek with a man, no…”
Your assimilation is incredibly selfish (motivated) and shallow.
If you are so incredibly aware of you, what ‘kind of man’ would tolerate all of you?? The answer is simple = Mostly any man.
With the exception of me. So you are right.
Shoot me because I discern healthy from toxic.;)
(All rhetorical statements please excuse me as I talk to myself in public).
… and I will admit that I’m not easy to get to know, to a point. Sure, I’m not easy to love either. Which makes my love all the more vital.
There.:)
“oh, and it mean consider you have been eaten by a rabbit.”
One should not try to take away anyone´s soulful beauty and uniqueness given to them by God. We should try to perfect it and nurture it. It is our responsibility to do so.
When Bunnies eat Tigers….well, bunnies don´t have Tiger Burgers in their diet. It will be unatural. If you are a “rabbit”, then be the best “bunny” that you can be. And do it soulfully well. It is Who you ARE.
But if you are fortunate to have access to Bunny and Tiger energies, then be the best Bunny and the best Tiger, that you can be. It will also be WHO you ARE.
Relationship entropy is energetic and is only possible through very specific conditions.
But Tigers will be Tigers – and once they “kill” a bunny, there really is no “CPR” to get its heart beating again.
There is only entropy…and transformation of bunny energy to nurture and feed the tiger.
Bunny is in the Tiger and nourishing him.
Death is death.
Gatubela,
Have you ever had the experience of relive the nightmare of your last? for me, my nightmare is having my choice taken away from me for a huge part of my life, by people who suppose to “love” me, and when they don’t get their way, they make me feel “wrong” for the choices I make.
I have vowed never to let this happen to me again. and I won’t. The only reason that I embrace death, or I presume anyone embrace death, is to LIVE more fully. We should never lose sight of this GOAL of TO LIVE no matter what, and for my right to LIVE, nothing is too small a price to pay.
And the tolerance I talked about, is born out of trust and understanding …strength …not out of weakness.
Thank you Gatubela, for your kindness.
No – there may be similarities, but it is not the same.
I may want to live desperately – but my will is never above God´s.
I jumped and loved…and I would do it again.
I am still dying. But this time, dying is “living”.
Falling this time, is “upwards” instead of downwards.
Entropy.
“This focus, expansion, consciousness or whatever you want to call it… has also proven too overwhelming for one beautiful daffodil.”
In general terms, if I understand your position correctly, you are only talking about your consciousness and not the “daffodil´s”?
Anyways, in my experiences, it was always…
“the expansion of OUR consciousness…”
Yes, Our. But I can tell if a woman wants the control. A Tiger can’t submit to a Rabbit. Why?… It is not in his Nature.
That’s what I mean by ‘Our’ consciousness. Our means, both humans.
Plus an Eagle can’t fly in it’s freedom if he is married to a Rabbit doing back-flips in the meadow.
The last time checked… the Eagle swoops down and kills the Rabbit for dinner. The Eagle does not submit to the Rabbit’s antics. Because again, it is not in his Nature.
Two circles with no interval.
The truth.
Sometimes I wish I’m a man, so I will gain a brother, instead of lose a friend.
No – there is a bridge that involves no “submission” or “domination” polarizing energies between bunny and tiger.
But that bridge is crossed in Beautiful, not here.
Rabbits are bunnies – some loppy, some meaty, some plump….LoL!!!
Tigers are cubs with cute stripes and fuzzy fur.
We are all children in the eyes of God.
With my staggering ignorance, I still try to see the world and live in it as God would.
Humility is a divine gift.
“…We are all children in the eyes of God…”
Yes. But humans fail miserably to see the God in humans. Desirous motivations pull humans into the Dark (the material world).
What is this mundane illusion among people?
It is that people ‘Grasp’ the seduction of the material world as product of it’s own “Light”.
I’ve said it before: Desire rules the world. Everything that ‘happens’ as a result of collective human desire, and individual human desire manifests both good and evil. Each direction of desire has an intrinsic choice.
Where are humans headed for certain? Death. Sure… buried in the ground or at sea. That’s all we ‘are’ in physical terms. Life is pretty meaningless if all we were supposed to do here was be material kings and have ravished the cutest maidens. What meaning is that?
We live 70-85 years. The earth lives 150 billion years. The universe lives 750 billion years.
What consequence are our toys, lovers and political importance in the scheme of it all?
Perspective.
The author JoJo was quoting was not speaking to us in literal terms. Literal is what is perceived from the ground. The seen dysfunctional plains where Bunnnies do their back-flips, breed, and cuddle up with their loved ones. The Literal, meaning the ground perception, is not real consciousness in terms of Who we are and How we behave every moment.
The author was speaking to us in Occult Language. Occult Consciousness. He was putting forth Symbols as to what I said above… WHO we are, and HOW we behave. Us. People. Based on Nature. Which manifests our deeds, our level of awareness and ultimately our capacity for freedom. From the Bunny perception, playing and breeding on the plains of this earth, freedom and happiness is conceptualized THROUGH that bunny, Who the bunny is in it’s reality, and by How the bunny behaves in that bubble of reality. The bunny’s perceived concept of freedom and happiness are NOTHING similar to that of a soaring Eagle, who is a NATURAL predator. The Tiger being another Natural predator.
The author who shared his insights “KNEW” that rabbits cannot eat tigers, that apples cannot fly into the sky, that water cannot gush uphill. The meaning behind his statements are once again not Literal. JoJo vented at me because she “actually Beleived” the literal manifestation is ‘natural’ occurrence between man and woman. Yet as we can see in the above Symbols, the above Metaphors, from a mystical consciousness we can Discern and Understand what IS natural and what IS NOT natural of this earth, and far beyond this earth.
True Consciousness is the connection of a myriad of worlds.
Freedom is not lunacy or disillusionment in my world. Nor is lunacy true or real in my world. Lunacy cannot grow through it’s being. That is simply it’s nature.
Speaking of nature, it’s not natural for a Bunnie to actually eat a predator, but…it’s also not nature for a Bunnie to stand there with a smile waiting to be eaten.
Let’s speak the language of nature when a Bunnie is facing an eagle or a tiger, I’d say it’s very natural for it to run like hell.
Run like hell in process.
Hmmmmm….,
Bunnies will be bunnies – and when they have learned all the lessons from “bunnydom”, perhaps they will start a new path.
Tigers will be Tigers. And the same goes for them.
We are not bunnies forever. And we are not tigers forever.
Something happens when we die.
Personality is one of the biggest illusions there is.
well as much as i’d like to be an bird like an eagle or an albatross or a dolphin or a duck or a jellyfish i’m a human being. a woman.
A WOMAN. with boobs. and hips. and a tummy and toes and im not covered in fur or feathers ( as nice as that may feel). maybe i will glue some on sometime just for the hell of it. or don the bear suit. it is nice and warm. what hunts bears though? oh yeah.. humans..ha.
maybe bunnies have psychological battles with their swooping grass??
hmm not sure about that.
Pluto,
I want to apologize to you that I yelled at you and vent at you…the pain of my past just collided with your words and crashed down on me… it’s not a war to me, or an antic, or control….it’s life and death to me, in the physical sense… I really rather die then lose my freedom to chose again.
To me the creator only created one truth, one freedom, everyone at some point of their lives, from their own position, touched that truth and that freedom closet to themselves…so a Bunnie’s freedom is as real as a Eagle’s freedom, it’s infinitely real to each and both of them. The energy that is Persephone is an energy of acceptance and love…so, I have already accept the Egale’s freedom and loved it, I never seek to change it, I try to find the balance point where the choice is not to be a brother or lose a friend, I try to exist in Cosmo and on the cosmic level, everyone love each other freely.
My delivery of my choice was done very poorly, I’m still learning, five year old driving a tank…I know I disappoint you, but the choice is either that, or disappoint myself, for losing the spirit I have lost for so long, and fought so many inner demons to have found it again. I cannot live with myself if it’s not physical death that took that spirit from me. I know an eagle has so many ways to eat a Bunnie, and it’s not doing it only out of love and restrain, but the pain from that self restrain and disappointment is very very real… I’m so sorry… I feel your pain, I’m sorry.
You’re finding your true-self JoJo, that’s growth. I am happy for you. I now see your calm self-reflection. A mountain doesn’t move from the puffy whims of any bunny JoJo. What stabalizes me inside you’ll never know. I know who you are. None of your expressions have hurt me. I am more concerned about you hurting yourself, when not grounded in soul.
Be good to you… as I mentioned a long time ago.
Stabilizes.:)
…there are no words to describe it, but the air is filled with it…my gratitude.
Cosmos energy will not “work” with freedom alone.
Therefore, understand that as you grow, “freedom” is not worth “dying” for in a cosmic sense.
What is worth dying for is Feminine energies, in the hands of a loving masculine soul, who will not misuse these very powerful forces, as the feminine surrenders and releases through the masculine.
But what does she surrender to? Usually, masculine deceit, control and slavery, trickery and lies.
Men usually think that under women are property.
“You are mine!”, while professing “love” and making them feel their “energies”. How does a bunny feel to be in a “Tiger”?
If feminine energies allow themselves to be “dominated” and become submissive to these animalistic energies, the world suffers more of the same.
And this is what is happening.
Imagine if balanced was not achieved beforehand. What would have been released? More of the same.
Freedom is “depolarized” in the cosmos due to the fact that there is an unlimitted supply of energy to be released.
Love first and foremost – in all aspects and in all daily activities.
Humans would not die, if they understood this.
“…Love first and foremost – in all aspects and in all daily activities..”
Yes, but we must remember “love is blind”… and that cliche is true when we experience our own deceptions of what love has been or is… and most importantly what love – Means.
Blind love always gets punished.
Real love… however, ‘learns’ through that punishment. Real love can see.
Finding meaning gives me freedom.
“Blind love always gets punished”
Looking at my posterior merchandise, my butt is still “smarting”, but I guess it got big enough to “cushion” me a bit more every time I fall!!! (I keep on saying it – but where the heck is that Spa!?)
I think my tush came with springs on it. I feel like Tigger from Winnie the Pooh.
Sometimes, in order to “see”, I choose blindness. Why?
Because love is the best “guide” through the darkness. It is like completely trusting your heart to physically walk.
You would think that they were not connected, but they are.
Everything is.
“…Sometimes, in order to “see”, I choose blindness. Why?..”
Because ‘seeing’ from the conscious manifestation of love is not usually real. Meaning, that experience of love does not know, nor evolve through ones pain, or ones perception of what is true or false. Love is false – mostly because one’s ego-consciousness is “enclosed” on the seen material plane. The Superficial. The superficial reality within humans as mentioned above are “impressed”…and “depressed” and trapped by what that ego perceives on the material plane. That bubble of “love” is all it’s willing to feeeeeel. Whereas, a spiritual warrior/soul’s love exchange ‘Transcends’ it’s seen mutual feeling on deep Subconcious levels. The Subconcious mind can feel the “Realness” and Rawness (is a better adjective) of love, because it has FELT all the hues it could by virtue of pain or suffering. By transcending that pain into?… Soulful Knowing.
Ego-love does not transcend squat in our superficial reality.
What I have just shared is far from logical. Surface social/relational love feels pain, then runs away from that pain. The human ego “veils” any truth of pain and “escapes” into a mryiad of self-pity, addictions, phobias, self-confusion, apathy and fear.
Being in tune with the Subconcious is a weapon for fighting any perceived slights or injuries.
A human who deeply knows him/herself senses the Subconcious world simply by feeling ‘Everything’ their is to feel, and grows greater, stronger in spirit and soul, by virtue of having the sheer will and bravery to do so.
‘Becoming’ is through (inward) experience.
“…Sometimes, in order to “see”, I choose blindness. Why?..”
… So you haven’t really ‘chosen’ blindness.
Blindness, chose you.:)
real love never needs any punishment whatsoever. there is nothing to learn because it is real. not manufactured.otherwise it is just a self fulfilling delusion to keep one stuck in the never ending cycle of searching for something that is unattainable and the punishment continues.along with “freedom”.
Freedom is a state of consciousness. An awareness of self, both stagnant and fluid. Freedom in my world is not bound to conformed opinion, while respecting the need of boundaries formed among society. ‘Most’ human beings simply do not, or cannot change (die). They subconsciously remain ‘the same’ emotionally. Their subconcious fears (doubts) control the decisions of their lives. Victory over the lower-self is not realized. Because the lower-self is not understood within a persons behaviour. The lower-self being the desire of material “light”. The manifestation of the lower-self is very common in males. Hence their insensitivity, chauvinistic, blind and pathetic expressions of individuality. They are males who think with their libido. Not their divinity. Their sexual/psycho-emotional evolution is equal to that of the animal kingdom. These males are ‘dominant’ because they do not value a higher mind evolution, above the need to fornicate for the sake of fornicating. Thus they abuse the divinity of sexuality via their lies (to himself), their greed believing that the ends always justify the means… and the same psychology of the ends justifying the means, with women they desire ‘to own’.
Now women lie plenty too. Maybe more so than men. I have known women who’s hubris out blow alot of men. They too abuse the sexual/social/financial intuitve power they have been given in the material world.
So humans on a mundane consciousness don’t really change (die). Unless the death of a soul who was very close to them touched their lives and left them devastated after their their passing. That type of event can shake up the illusions one had while the loved one was alive and in giving meaning to their life. But in terms of people intrinsically dying (transforming) through their brave volition, no… they fail to change as people on deep levels. The myth of the known surface usually enraptures, impresses, depresses and traps the human psyche (from the heart and soul). The unknown of real transformative death and awakening forever awaits them, until they physically die.
“The energy that is Persephone is an energy of acceptance and love.”
The more I have felt these energies, I realize that there is more to them.
No – acceptance and love is the path up…but it is not the energy.
Otherwise, you are just basking in Beautiful. However, just being near a person who feels “Beautiful” is enough.
But scorpionic energy does not want to stay in Beautiful. Not when the world is so Ugly.
Therefore, Scorpio will say to him or herself…I will not JUST go “up” to Beautiful….and teach the path to others. (Gosh…I hope that they will join me out of their free will…) Ya think so?
LoL!!!
They are going to say…
While I am on this earth and with the time that I have…
Beautiful is comng “down” to me…(squinty, flinty side look at “Ugly” world)
The reversal of this energy changes the perpective view from “Tiger” (predator) to “Bunny” (prey).
So, perhaps bunnies become tigers, and tigers become bunnies. Or…the feminine becomes “dark” and the maculine becomes “white” in the cosmos.
Cosmic Freedom could be the ability to “transform” and “transcend” energy through balanced (masculine infused seed and feminine surrender seed )choices made through love and truth under God´s will.
…but it is not just “the ability to choose”.
Hi P.Puppy,
“Blindness, chose you.:)”
It seems to be doing that alot lately.
I would like to dedicate a song to all Scorpio men out there. It called “The Secret Garden”, by Quincy Jones. I feel a bit wierd doing this, because of the “content” and the hidden “promise” that it contains. So, put out the lights, be alone…and listen to it.
Who wouldn´t want a man like that – who knows you?
But Scorpionic energies don´t stop there, due to the drive to transform and transcend. They go way…way beyond.
Can one see beyond the “effect” of the song on oneself?
Gatubela, that song just proves a bunny won’t know how to surrender her mind-bubble of “love”, until the right guy ‘moves her’ deep within.
Yet when or if that man ‘moves a woman’… she fights that feeling (her unknown). Nothing uncommon, trust me. Making her feel safe while in the throws of shocking love-transformation is not a risk-free, simple dynamic. He must continually prove his higher-self to her, as he knows he will be tested over and over for his strength and virtue.
Hi P.Puppy,
I have tried to understand this one…
“He must continually prove his higher-self to her, as he knows he will be tested over and over for his strength and virtue.”
Not the context, but the word “prove” and “tested” with the implication that “She” is “qualified” to perform these “awesome” tasks. This would be a gross state of ignorance and stagnation, on her part.
You can´t test the higher self. It is HIGHER than the current arsenal of evaluation criteria mentally perceived by oneself.
You can only permit to “emerge”. And stand back and learn from what the heck happens.
The higher self exists (and it would be silly to ignore it in ourselves and consciously prevent its emergence in others) and will and must come out within the dynamic, if it is prioritized under soulfullness. “Proving” and “testing” is contrary to a spiritual loving dynamic. Actually, it does not exist.
Good thing we learnt humility, tolerance and acquired a bit of wisdom while we suffered – right?
Well, the reason that I dedicated that song is because I feel that women must strive to go beyond themselves and all of the “goodies” implied in that song.
So…what I wanted to say with that song is…we actually should not look for these things in a relationship.
Relationships actually, are divine. Does God need to keep up with the Jone´s or have all the material comforts? Although we live in an earthly environment, we still can strive to be just as divine with others, by not stepping on their “souls”.
But divinity can not be activated when it is not seen in oneself and others, and blinded by “what we desire”.
Boy, a whole bunch of women are going to be mad at me.
“..You can´t test the higher self. It is HIGHER than the current arsenal of evaluation criteria mentally perceived by oneself..”
It’s not logical. Look, she is not aware of his higher self. She is not aware that she is actually testing him to feel safe in her own ambivalence. I have already shared my views that women subconsciously test men during literaly every moment of interacting and relating. Plus, it is also reasonable to realize that 90% of men are not in tune with greater values, greater social ethics, greater integrity and human responsibilities which give meaning in their ambitious or hard working daily lives.
This is not about “ignorance” between man and woman. It is really about the lack of life purpose, life values and morals and the supreme lack of conciousness in the male. He is supposed to consistantly inject meaningful love in the woman, accessing deeper meaning in the woman, in the way he makes her feel.
Love is blind because love is superficial and egoistical between most couples. That kind of ‘love’ is on the fast track to game and denial bliss.
An evolving scorpio male has learned to kill his ego throughout his volatile life and open his soul to the world, including the little feminine beauty standing right before him, the Persephone sharing his bed.
“Look, she is not aware of his higher self”
Hmmmmm….
Of course, if you are talking about that kind of woman, then it will be the Man´s job to “inject” new meaning into the relationship. (I guess it is time to get back to work and “inject some meaning” into my woman.)
I don´t mean to sound square, but it seems very one sided.
On the otherhand, she can not be aware of HIS higher self, if she has not cultivated HER higher self beforehand.
It will scare the bunny fuzzies off her.
A woman who is aware, will SEE what Mr. Scorpio does not “Tell” anyone.
It will be staring at her, right in the face. Being the the Persephone (Hades wife)that she is, she will do what she does best (Harvest), because she has learnt to do it within herself through embracing her duality.
Otherwise, she is a Persephoney.
haha. persephoney…
and hateys.
Hades. hate tease. hate these.
“You can´t test the higher self. It is HIGHER than the current arsenal of evaluation criteria mentally perceived by oneself.
You can only permit to “emerge”. And stand back and learn from what the heck happens.
The higher self exists (and it would be silly to ignore it in ourselves and consciously prevent its emergence in others) and will and must come out within the dynamic, if it is prioritized under soulfullness. “Proving” and “testing” is contrary to a spiritual loving dynamic. Actually, it does not exist.”
exactly.
by continually mentally polarizing oneself between higher and lower self, one delays the “actualization” of SURRENDER.
“Proving” and “testing” is contrary to a spiritual loving dynamic. Actually, it does not exist.”
O Yes it does. All the time. Everywhere – On the Lower-Self level. Sure, it’s not happening right now between you and I, and all of us right here. But in the real world of dating and the “getting to know ya” stage of intimacy, deception, fear and testing run rampant. Meaning… normalcy, lack of in depth sharing and empathizing.
What couples among you that you know or have known, including your own dysfunctional relationships are high minded, highly principled, spiritually aware and committed to open exchanges of honesty??
See?… very few. Games and insecurity are THE NORM… even among 30-65 yr old adults. It’s true and real.
There are millions of married couples, boyfriend and girlfriend who don’t even know their partner.They have no clue about eachother until Hades bites them on the ass;)
Explain that one to me when you say….“Proving” and “testing” is contrary to a spiritual loving dynamic…”
Case closed.:)
case not closed. you are only fighting yourself. do i have to clean the wax out of your ears? you are spending all your energy focusing on what’s OUT THERE instead of what YOU feel and what YOU are cultivating between YOU and the beautiful Persephone who shares your bed.
Hi Umm,
“real love never needs any punishment whatsoever. there is nothing to learn because it is real. not manufactured”.
Punishment – is a terrible thing to desire for someone you love.
So – this is why I maintain my silence. Because the energy of our imperfections will STILL be within the dynamic. It does not “go away”. Energy can only be transformed, but not destroyed. So, what can you do with it? Well, most women would use “testing” and “proving” – right?
An option is to “raise” it as high as possible, to be transformed, for a higher purpose, under God´s guidance.
But this can only happen when one is not “enslaved”.
Therefore, “freedom” must be obtained – in the known and in the unknown.
What is above, must be below…in order for the energy to be given.
The Love is still there though.
Hi P.Puppy…
I am struggling to understand this a bit more, because, DARN IT – how friggin´ subconscious is it?
This would have to be based on desire and not on love. You would have to want something from the other person. But this goes contrary and the energetic openess gets lost.
Wanting or desire is focussing on the person
You would have to understand the concept of …No desire.
Not desiring is focussing on open energetic flow and the Unknown.
I just got shivers.
“you are spending all your energy focusing on what’s OUT THERE instead of what YOU feel”…
Or, instead of your heart.
Everyone deserves to be soulfully happy. I am sure that she will be a very blessed woman.
Hi P.Puppy,
“Explain that one to me when you say….“Proving” and “testing” is contrary to a spiritual loving dynamic…”
Well, you just did – Hades has not “bitten” them in the arse. Their minds as children are not cultured in peace. We seemed to be geared to “suffer” for our divinity. But I have seen children and we are souls FIRST and then we develop EGO. (Or ego is developed for us because we are unable to “judge” as children.)
Listen to this song – it is from Skillet and it is called “Monster”.
Most men and women do not see the monster that they can be.
If you don´t see it, then you will be it.
“…We seemed to be geared to “suffer” for our divinity…”
That’s right. That basis, the root of “all existence” is the ‘Symbolism’ which is loudly spoken from the entire Catholic Church and Christiantiy itself (and other Religions).
A few of billion combined followers. Pretty amazing huh?? Yet how do these masses interpret God and Existence?… well One thing is for sure in what they can’t interpret. Their doctrines do not ’empower the motives’ for self-mastery and cosmic transformation, within ones-self. People “think” they are ‘born again’… but I question, what freedom is there when one is bound to perceiving Nouns on the Literal Plane?… ‘Outside’ of ones molecular body? The results are factual: Sheer controlling mind/heart influences and pure deception and greed are the sexual (motivations/desires/forces) behind such a man-made “power”.
Show me the man/woman who Transcends his or her inner-life through complete physical disaster and devastation, and I will show you a master of ones Spiritual incarnation emerging to an immortal station.
Reading the Bible and “Nouning it’s Meanings” has nothing to do with such a journey… because I have never read the Bible. The evil we see is the manifestation of man and his desire on the material plane. Nothing is “wrong” with material gain. The vice I emphasize is “the means” by which man evolves into his own fearful monster.
I AM, the Verb, OF the Bible.;)
More men and women throughout time have been raped, tortured, swindled, shamed and murdered – “In The Name of God”… than any other man-made “belief”.
An entire religion(s) founded on an Oxymoron.:)
No judgement, just awareness. When we are hearing, feeling and seeing from the free/eternal spiritual, what are we ‘really’ tuning in to??… What do we realize we exist amid??
Maya.
Yep. Our literal, superficial lives scramble in the daily “worries” of Maya.
Except this guy now (have not always) inter-relates with maya and the unseen subconscious powers from the higher-plane of self-mastery every micro-second.
I’m still not a perfect self-master. But if anyone really knew of my intense inner turmoil (now mostly at peace) they we understand my journey.
Hi P.Puppy,
“But if anyone really knew of my intense inner turmoil (now mostly at peace) they we understand my journey.”
Journeys can be understood when someone also goes through the “same” steps. Therefore, they have to be “experienced”. Otherwise it is not understanding – it is superficial relating to a “great and amazing story”.
Desiring understanding and balance in relationships, is actually considered as a good reason to get “pissed off” as most men become “wary” of ulterior motives.
Believe me, I know!!! All of a sudden, the other person´s monster rears its “illusion”.
So, what you will see, is what the person is NOT, until balance is obtained.
Scorpionic swooping is a pretty complete package, with a whole bunch of Abyss “freebies” and “benefits” to be experienced by the “swoopee”, curtesy of the “swooper”.
But it is the price I pay to understand what the person IS.
You are not a birth date and place. You are a special and unique person.
Hi Umm,
“persephoney…and hateys.”
Hey, you made it better!
LoL!
Puppy,
I debate with myself whether to come here and say this to you… I haven’t changed my choice, so I ask myself what’s the point if nothing is changed… but then, what’s the point of us doing so many things, except the reason that we care. So here I am, me, talk to you a bit about who I am.
I have always known you are a man of self-mastery, I see that streamline of energy, I walked to it and felt its glow. I have known you would of changed if you had felt truth as I felt it inside of you…but, to accept a man is not to expect him to change, not ask for it, live with the way he is, find the interval where love do exist freely, the Cosmo. So you see, you never have to prove anything to me, I know the energy, I deal with the present, but never doubt your higher-self in the infinite future. But acceptance to me means not to hold an agenda to interact with you, it means let you live your life but also don’t stop living mine. And I didn’t, life goes on, in the goes on a lot of awareness happened, the chronicles of events.
Have you ever had the feeling that the sleeping warrior in you sometimes would be awakened by certain awareness and it can’t go back to sleep, it had to act according to that awareness? Well, it happened to me, the sleeping knight in me was awakened by my awareness of the honorable acts of a man, it can’t go back to act as if he is still my jailer and abuser, it was called to respect when respected, act honorably when acts towards me are honorable.
I never told you this, but I am a woman who actually do not believe in marriage, the concept that’s been abused by the social norm, the act of one person feeling they own the other, that motives are based on who we see ourselves as instead of how we feel out of genuine love, bond, and free will. I stand against these acts that exist in marriages everywhere, and then I realized I’m not against marriage, I stand against these acts. I see the bond and love between man and woman exists in how they share themselves in a dynamic. So, while my husband acted in the name of marriage to abuse it’s meaning, I don’t really feel married to him. But when I do see the change in him, the respect and honor he had shown me, the dynamic changed. I want to respect and honor him in my dealings with him. Please understand this is not a choice, he is already in my life before I met anyone, it’s not a choice whether I face him or not, the choice is HOW I face him.
While I was ignorant of the change in him, I really don’t’ feel wrong in my feelings for others, I hold the truth in there is no law in the world rules the freedom of people’s minds and feelings, no jail can lack a heart, everything… is free will. But I hold the integrity in not physically violate a vow of fidelity before the end of the union.
I want to tell you a little story so maybe you understand how I feel… when my son was two, he took a camera from a store and hide it in his blanket, I didn’t know until I tried to put him in the car, then I saw the camera, he was so good at it no one saw a thing. I took it back to the store, there is no other choice, isn’t it, now I know, so I have to act. It’s easy to pretend not to see anything have changed, no one would have known I realized anything, it had happened in my mind, but, the truth is now I know, so I have to act… do you feel me? Anti-entropy.
If people keep in mind I try to do everything anti-entropy as I can, then it’s not hard to understand that when people interact with me, they actually have to reverse everything they are used to when interacting with others, meaning, they need to try to take my words and disregard my acts. Yes, it’s funny I put it this way, but that’s actually what I do, I will try my hardest to tell people my honest intentions as consciousness is revealed to me, and act out of anti-entropy for no rewards, act because “the mountain is there” and as I feel it’s the right thing to do. If people stop trying to find motives in my acts and trying to disregard my words, they will begin to understand this lone alien on planet earth. Think back on everything I ever said to you… do you see the effort I put in to follow through all of my words?
So when I told you I intent to keep the promise I made to Apollo, that is what I will do, that is my intent. Although my act is to interact and relate to people in pain, anti-entropy, for no other reason than to not become cruel (as defined by indifference to suffering). Keep a promise but not at the cost of real compassion… all these acts do not lead to a change of my intent, which I told clearly in words to everyone needed to know…
So this is my Choice, the choice to resolve my marital situation as I work it out before I start to consider anything else. I do not put a goal to it, I let truth work itself out without an agenda. People do not really ask what that choice actually is, instead, they are very interested in should I make that choice or not. My choice, in the chronicles of events, Is already formed and in motion before I came back as the Cosmo energy, I felt hurt by your acceptance or lack of it, because I gave the power to you freely to hurt me, if I don’t have a care in the world, no one can take away my choices, no one has power over me, no one can hurt me, but there is nothing wrong with care and feelings. I gave the power to people to hurt me by their rejection or lies because I care, and that is not my weakness… it would be sad to feel it is by anyone who I gave that power to.
Do I feel everything? Yes I do, my world to me… everything and everyone is part of it, like vital parts of an elephant, as in that story of blind men and the elephant. To me my world is the elephant, and it makes no sense to say which part is vital in what sense, it’s all vital to be alive. And any decision that is out of love and health of the elephant is a choice of heart. The elephant has to walk forward, instead of debating the vitality of parts. The Buddha must have missed so many chances to be in something beautiful at the moment, but to the Buddha, every path is meaningful as long as you walk it with meaning in heart and soul.
I feel everything, the elephant feels every pulse, every breathing, every moment of being alive… it’s just…walking now.
I want to share a song…
for now, that name is not a man, but the word LOVE, in all shapes and form.
“…I felt hurt by your acceptance or lack of it, because I gave the power to you freely to hurt me…”
No darling. We hurt ourselves. We are to be accountable. No-one else.
I have always accepted you. You have already cleared the perception that I was responsible for your reactive outbursts. Yes, my words opened up real fears in your being… but I am not the conductor of your fears. You are. Well, you can’t have your thoughts both ways. There is no growth in utter confusion;)
Peace.
“…So this is my Choice, the choice to resolve my marital situation as I work it out before I start to consider anything else…”
Well that’s beautiful JoJo. I hope your guy has the capacity to love you equally in return for all the energies you have invested in him here on the blog. He deserves to know how you really feel about him, and from there… his love, affection, strength and foresight will carry your relationship to healthier heights and reach your souls beyond the love you once had. His sensitivity and honesty will heal you, and vice-versa. I send the best energies out to both of you;)
Puppy Labrador.;)
…He knows I’m not in love with him, that I’m leaving him…there is no illusion there… he is a human being, a very good one… be kind…he is losing his family and everything he motivated to work for in his life… the energy I invest here on him… is really nothing compare to what I take away from him… his wife, his son, life as he know it…
Respect and self-restrain, is something I can give…to be honorable under the circumstance…is not much…
…yes, the fear is all within, but it’s real, there are so many layers of it, when I overcome the fear of holding on to the vision of being abused, I see the abuse coming from me. yet how do one deal with these vision of new reality?…I don’t know other way but to deal with it one choice at a time…
…I didn’t mean to accuse you of hurting me, that paragraph is more of a collective experience of feeling not been understood, perhaps I should word it differently, I’m vulnerable to those I care, but that vulnerability I gave to people freely, becasue I am open to those I care…
…but the fact of life is…no one can walk on two different path at the same time… the result would be the torture and rape of everyone… no one want to torture or rape others…sometimes, fate has it as the chronicles of events…
…please don’t feel I’m accusing anything when I say chronicles of events…how do I describe it? when I start to see things without fear of truly seeing them, I dealt with these new visions that is open to me, not only one thing, I dealt with many visions… but that choice is one that has more impact on my intents…
Hi JoJo…
Those choices “to be abused” …sound like something that someone talked to me about recently.
At the moment of choice, you can not have one or the other. Do you choose what is shown to YOU by your own higher self, or do you choose what others show to you? What do you use to navegate in the “unknown”?…
What reality do you choose to manifest?
Relationships are divine. If you work with the DIVINE aspect, then there will be no REAL abuse to you. Why? Because working with someone`s higher self, activates yours.
Someone will say “water”, but you know that it is “fire”.
Abusers can not wash their hands out of this one – because what they do best IS to work with fear energies.
Abusees will do what they do best too.
Our choices and our vision in making them and our suffering giving meaning to them, actually can change the course of history in our lives…and with out exagerating…
…in this world.
As I have said before, if you do not see the monster, you will be it.
Hi again JoJo,
““…I felt hurt by your acceptance or lack of it, because I gave the power to you freely to hurt me…”
I sure hope P.Puppy did not “swoop you” while you were in the meadow, innocently playing in the sun and picking those soulful flowers with your heart.
In that scenario…It would change the meaning of your sentence, to…
“I felt hurt because I saw your soul with my heart, but your lower self was more powerful”.
Maya. Anti-entropy indeed.
Well, those reversal energies will get you in the butt all the time …
Hades has a way of doing that.
But feminine and masculine “reversal energies” seem to work in reverse of each other!!! Go figure!
Anyways, P.Puppy really did not do anything to you…as we can see by your strength and love.
Hi JoJo,
The beauty of surrendering to someone´s higher self – is that it is not anti-entropy – or acting what is on your mind as you define it. The lower masculine self “demands or expects it” as we can see with some comments right here in this forum.
It is strange to have the vision of someone´s higher self and it is so happy to “see” you because you see the being that it is.
This is also why a man´s virtue does not really have to be proved or tested by a woman. She already knows how he really is – actually, she never doubted it. It just had not manifested itself in the “chronicle of events” within the dynamic.
Your comments have rung a chord in my being due to their incredible similarity to my situation.
“So, while my husband acted in the name of marriage to abuse it’s meaning, I don’t really feel married to him.”
While my husband did what he did, I actually did feel married to him. I resigned myself to my “death” as I was told that I was surely going to die shortly. To deal with the last of the time that I felt I had, I helped others and prepared myself to be worthy to meet my maker. So, I chose blindness.
And then “blindness” choose me. You will not believe the visions I started having.
My husband was not abusing the marriage – he was abusing the fact that I could never be legally divorced to him to committ atrocities. As a victim of a dictator and a torturer, he learnt very well how to become one.
Still – the only reason that I left my marriage, was the fact that I had to choose between being a mother or being a wife.
I chose protecting my children from him and his psychopathic actions.
Do I stand and do nothing or do I STOP the illusion?
Please understand this is not a choice, he is already in my life before I met anyone…
I have also had this feeling. I have felt this person – or this energy before, in my dreams, way before I met this person. It was like a real person coming to me and actually BEING in the room.
I thought such mastery did not exist and that it really was just a dream and my personal fantasy. 4 or 5 years ago, I really thought I was crazy and I attributed to my bad marriage.
I see that I was wrong. It would not be the first time.
But I hold the integrity in not physically violate a vow of fidelity before the end of the union.
Good for you. So beautiful. Makes me want to be 20 again, and to have not faced my own monster. 1994 was an interesting year for me. While my friends were living it up, I was a hermit and preferred reading, music and solitude.
Remember, if you thought it…you did it. Physical fidelity is a bit of a myth, when the mind is not loyal.
Facing your “weaknessess” and understanding them is a blessing, only if you beg for this understanding from God.
It is like dying in peace, once you stop running from an unescapable truth, especially when it feels like someone has your soul.
“they actually have to reverse everything they are used to when interacting with others, meaning, they need to try to take my words and disregard my acts.”
Sounds hypocritical – Are you sure they know where you are coming from? Are you choosing not to act? Stillness and non-movement?
In my experiences, you must know the good and the bad. They are like pillars of energy that “complete” you and complete a energetic circuit. How can one have compassion if they are ignorant of thier own imperfections?
The question could arise,that once you are aware, how should you manifest this awareness? I imagine that that should be left up to “GOD” and those energies of surrender.
We are not masters here in this earth. We can only permit “mastering energies” to be expressed through us. The person that can do this, is a statement in itself.
I gave the power to people to hurt me by their rejection or lies because I care, and that is not my weakness… it would be sad to feel it is by anyone who I gave that power to.
This is interesting – but I imagine that there could be something missing here. So I am going to rephrase this in another way and hope that we can obtain more meaning from it…
The only power that can be obtained from allowing people to hurt you…is an incredible learning experience based on huge ouchie, if you did it on your own accord.
However, if you did it for divine reasons, we are now operating under a different set of rules, and the exact opposite of your sentence occurred.
You allowed people to “hurt themselves” . You were never at any risk.
“So this is my Choice, the choice to resolve my marital situation as I work it out before I start to consider anything else. I do not put a goal to it, I let truth work itself out without an agenda.”
Darn it Girl – You be lucky!!!
I wanted to be divorced yesterday, 10 years ago!
I couldn´t though. The monster that is my soon to be ex, would have destroyed my children. Their safety was first and foremost – above myself and my reputation as a “good woman”.
He knows I’m not in love with him, that I’m leaving him…there is no illusion there… he is a human being, a very good one… be kind…he is losing his family and everything he motivated to work for in his life… the energy I invest here on him… is really nothing compare to what I take away from him… his wife, his son, life as he know it…
What are you doing JoJo?
You did not strive to give back his life, his passion, his beauty, his desire, and all that makes him a man.
Was he not “dead” or wanted to die anyways and that changed once he laid eyes on you?
I would understand a bit more (soulful understanding and not judging), if he clearly said that he did not want anything to do with you, but from what I see, this is not the case?
…yes, the fear is all within, but it’s real, there are so many layers of it, when I overcome the fear of holding on to the vision of being abused, I see the abuse coming from me. yet how do one deal with these vision of new reality?…I don’t know other way but to deal with it one choice at a time…
Well, in my experience, it is just as bad to permit the abuse.
Surrender JoJo. The choice is actually one. Can you really run away from what you want most, forever?
Hi again JoJo,
A man loosing his family, his child, and all that he has worked for makes my heart tremble in concern and loving compassion for you and for him…
May God be with you and him, during these trying times.
He reminds me of me…tell him it ain´t so bad really, once you hear those angels singing.
As long as you have a bed to sleep in, then it is alright. Then everything with a roof on it, even a tent, is a palace and can be a place of joy.
Hope he likes camping – it will be just like it!
Yeah, you get a wierd sense of humour when Hades kicks you in the ass. Celulite ain´t gonna cushion the fall.
I will hold you in my heart. Strangely, if I could share my energy with you, I would.
I hope that he knows that there is nothing to fear and that he is never alone.
” yet how do one deal with these vision of new reality?…”
I am back!
I may be writing an essay here…
Well, you deal with it, by the conflicts that begin arising almost out of nowhere. These conflicts actually are the differences between the higher self and the lower self, when there is no balance. So, they are your teachers.
You begin listening to yourself rather objectively and not subjectively. So, don´t take yourself so seriously. (Lower self does not like this, as everything is IMPORTANT to it, so expect the illusion to give a good battle)
What you are listening to, is your heart. Yeah, it talks. And it is very precise and correct.
It will say…do nothing….don´t get on that bus…wait and see…
So, you will do things that are actually completely different to how you are currently operating.
So, all that you do, must be harmonious with your “heart” and “mind”.
When you do not feel the peace, you are out of sync. So feel the peace first.
Meditate and walk in peace. Stay there.
The choices start to disappear, and you begin TO BE.
Remember, when you do not feel the peace, there is something that must be dealt with. These are actually issues that come up for healing. So if you are scared of “being alone” or “being abandoned”, you will go through it, in order for it to come into contact with your heart and heal.
So, I had this fear of “getting killed”…and darn it, it nearly happened.
I resolved it by loosing my fear of death, accepting my responsibilities as a person, and embracing life.
If you are ever doubtful, duality has a very interesting property. The unknown comes to you and guides you.
So, life will take you where you are supposed to be.
Surfers should understand this feeling. You gotta ride that wave.
Hi P.Puppy,
“Puppy Labrador.;)”
Is this an official pooch namechange?
Male Labradors are cute, intelligent, playful…
I am so emotionally drained right now…
I don’t understand why am loving him now that he is gone and amputated me out of his life…
Hi Lovemari,
This would be very hard to answer…
Close your eyes, find your silence… Go past your current way of viewing yourself and everything that you want. What is there? Are you feeling those swirling galaxies and endless universes that move with an incredible powerful, slow-moving energy?
We are extremely small – but can be blessed to feel this energy of life and all that there is.
Perhaps he is near and asking you to feel him and his connection to everything that is…and the nothing that is. How he refused to give it up and how he battled to bring it to life.
The swirling ocean of life…and the universe. His journey and surrender to the God that we all can be.
To have finally come home is a wonderful experience to feel Perhaps it is you loving him…but your mind makes you blind. If you open your heart, you will see this wonderful connection that we all have.
Heaven on Earth – Gee whiz! The TRUTH past the Maya.
He… was probably “drained” while IN your life.
Lovmari:
We cleanse ourselves of meaningless personality love dysfunction, simply by walking away toward the sanctuary of our Soul. Our eternal solitude.
You had been tested. Much more than he would have liked, and you failed. You didn’t fail him, you lost sight of yourself. Which is what women do to maintain control and to feel safe. That’s why you feel drained. Learn what love is through your pain, then maybe you won’t fear love tremendously like you always have. See the Light, in your Dark.:)
We are literally all or nothing men.
Nothing means: lack of real, meaningful change felt in a stagnant relationship.
All means: probing eachothers limits, searching, destroying worn out thoughts and behaviour for the desire to seek meaning among relationship maya.
I’ve already said it. Women fail to surrender. Not to us. People fail their surrender to ‘the God within us’.
Hi Lovemari,
On a personal (and not a cosmic one)
Well, emotionally drained is interesting and I can only guess as to its causes.
If you need his presence, then you must ask yourself why this is so. However, the fact that you are in love with him is a new development. You were not before. Does he know about your feelings? From what I understand, he “ended it with you?”
You must be able to face the incredible responsibility that connection holds. Scorpio permitted the connection between the two of you, but you had not fallen for him.
Why maintain the connection under these circumstances? These energies are not for the faint of heart. If you are only working on emotional feelings and tried and true tested through tribulations virtue, you will collapse. You must be able to hold your ground and soulful connection to God, even if it means your “death”, your shame, your humiliation, your dignity,
The valley of life, tests your connection under all circumstances – and you will begin to see what YOU ARE.
It all must be shed…as this is EGO.
Two people may be connected, but it is through a greater energy, in which all of us are connected. Therefore, women and men must protect this beautiful connection that exists between all of us – and disconnect if necessary, in order to not contaminate the beautiful peace and sanctuary that it must hold.
I don´t mean to be harsh – but I have said before, my reality is HARSH. P.Puppy has said that we must “revere” the unknown, and he is right.
“If you are only working on emotional feelings and tried and true tested through tribulations virtue, you will collapse”…
Sorry, I made a mistake.
If you are only “wanting” connection with him, because of how he makes you feel, but have not developed a “backbone” under fire, then you will collapse.
The valley of death, sheds your ego and establishes connection. The valley of “life” (I made this one up), tests your connection. Uhhhh usually the via is through suffering…but it will be through anything that is not in connection with your higher self and the peace that you must be able to feel under any circumstances.
But women have “abused” scorpionic abilities through their mental perception and lower self, as “sexual”, great in bed, super sexy macho men.
They fail to see “what it took to get there”.
Miracles do happen – but are we aware of the work that had to be done in order to move…
one itsy bitsy atom of energy?
We can barely move ourselves…so I ask you, what hope is there for the future of this world.
So, obtain understanding from your “instability” and begin to stand up and BREATHE in deeply. You need oxygen – and your mind needs air in order to open up.
Then have a good cry, pamper yourself with gentleness and understanding, as those are the keys to finding all of the answers you need.
That experience of intense pain… the death via pain, I actually went through that last Sept, I didn’t know what it was, didn’t know until I read an astrology book that actually described what that pain/death felt like. That’s when I know I had “died” before, I had felt so much pain, then, the pain stopped, I felt like separated from my body, sitting in a bubble of shielding, watching my corpse float in the pool of dark death one inch under my feet, I can almost touch it…I can almost touch my deathly cold finger and smell the rusty blood…
What death through pain gave me, is freedom from fear of that pain… I know if I gotten through it, it no longer has a hold on me, ever… pain does not scare me once it did… it’s no longer unknown. But before my awareness, that experience was shelved, not knowing how to process it… it’s un-shelved now, in fact un-shelved before my surrender. I had known that real love is in essence all or nothing. All means to BE in it, body, soul, heart, mind, time, possession…utter openness…everything and anything, 100% all there from both the woman and the man, Nothing means, if one can’t be all in there, then in essence, one is not there at all, nothing.
This is how I love, all or nothing… and circumstance of life or as I said chronicles of events showed me, I can’t be all… so in essence… I’m nothing…
That fire we feel in love, the warm tentacles of connecting… it happens both ways… it can be reached from the man to the woman, and it can be reached from the woman to the man, as long as one knows how to love/burn, one can plan that warm fire in someone else’s heart. But when I know I’m nothing… I would never “connect” to another being… because when nothing is tested and the “can’t be there” fact shows itself in various forms, the pain from the disconnect is not something I wish on anyone… I may appear to be “cold” “un-feeling” “insensitive”… I am aware of what I am… it’s a choice. Do I feel everything? Yes I do… I feel them as deep as feelings can be.
Feelings, in essence is the state of our being, it’s in our smile, our movement, our moments of lost in space… it in essence is who we are… it need not be delivered when love is not shared… and when love is shared it must be delivered to love, the verb. So in the state of all or nothing… I share my feelings when I know it would heal… and I don’t share when I know it would harm, when I know I’m nothing.
The conviction that I am nothing coming from the cold word of integrity, I say it’s cold because it’s impartial, it do not take sides. Self-defense is called for under the act of duress. Attack after being wronged is called revenge, and there is a big difference between the two. Can I shoot a man on his back when he is not shooting at me? No, I can’t, it’s not who I am or who I ever will be.
I actually know this is actually what EVERY Scorpio man, or every man is looking for in a woman, Scorpio man more so than others, because they know, they are aware the dark side of human beings, in the back of their mind they always have this awareness that someday… no matter how much we love or they love, how deep they trust or we trust…there is always the chance of everything falls apart… what then? What would the man and woman in a dynamic DO in such a situation? The cold word of integrity means, someone will not sleep around behind your back no matter what, no matter what she feels come hell or high water, no matter what…She will deal with you with honor and respect if you show her the same…when you are in a relationship with a woman like this, you will NEVER be betrayed physically, yes, I know the pain of being betrayed this way to a man is a pain worse than death…and yes, she will leave his ass for sure, but she will not betray a husband this way. If she has in her to betray another man, she has in her to betray you, you better believe it.
To FEEL, means the Scorpio man knows the unpredictability of emotions, it means if a woman is not in total control of her cold integrity, she will disregard you when you no longer is the person she FEELS for, it means everything you see with disgust what’s been done by women to a fellow man she’s trying to get rid of or toying with, can befall on you too…the disrespect, the deceit, the calculation, the manipulation, the lack of compassion/kindness, the absence of love of any kind…
Every Scorpio man is looking for a woman with bear bone truth and honesty… to do what? to see the bottom of her cold words, integrity or betrayal …among other goodies… yes, you all look for it. In the heightened emotion of needing to be more important than anything that goes on in her life, or the calm clarity of seeing a woman’s cold integrity… you want the first, yet if you get it, you will never be able to trust her somewhere so deep inside. If you can’t have the first, you may walk away to the eternal solitude… but somewhere so deep inside…you will respect her.
I know, I actually know you better than you know yourself at moments.
The pain of death freed me, in a way, from pain, I feel it, I know the way to overcome it is to embrace it… and in this pain the clarity is always there, nothing takes away the clarity now… you will be OK, you’ve overcome and is intimate with pain… it does not take away your eternal soul or solitude… I know this… I take on the duty of carrying the weaker and their pain in my life… and I come to you with the burden of my stubbornness and duty… because you ARE stronger than me… you ARE bigger than me… you ARE someone I look up to and greatly admire… you ARE everything there is to be.
I will be OK too, I have in me the capacity and fearlessness to love, and someday I will… in the end, we will all be ok, because being who we are today, we are ok already.
………….He… was probably “drained” while IN your life…………
He mentioned many times that he is fed up! But he keeps coming back maybe trying to activate me and hope things will work out with me. I was stubborn. Maybe because I wasn’t ready or maybe I didn’t believe him. He talks about the future but it wasn’t clear to me what the future would be. I was looking for an assurance and show me that things would be ok if we will embark on a journey together regardless of our distance, cultural differences, his parents and etc. Now, I understand that I don’t need assurance from anyone. I just need to feel that love inside me. Nothing is impossible when you truly love.
Love is giving; love is when you are willing to risk it all, when you are willing to give everything and expecting nothing in return. Did he allow me to love him? When he said he is in love with me. I wanted to know him more and more and I want to love him like that. He explored my soul but he showed very little of himself. He may have showed at least 1% of who he really is. In that 1% I learned to care for him. I slowly showed my affection and I want to go through the process of loving him but he cut it off. Love is process, a journey. I don’t believe in love at first sight. I am very stubborn person. Not even a Scorpio guy can penetrate that. It has to come naturally. I have to feel it myself. He needs to bare his soul as well. I may have knowingly/unknowingly tested his patient and now he is gone.
………If you are only “wanting” connection with him, because of how he makes you feel, but have not developed a “backbone” under fire, then you will collapse……..
If I can go back and change the past…. I would be more honest to him but there is nothing much I would change. I will still run away from him like I did before. The overwhelming presence of him was too much for me to handle when I was still grieving for my lost love. I was traveling without a heart, without a soul, I hated everyone and question God for my pain when he found me. His penetrating games annoy me. I will still ask him to dump me like how he amputates me out of his life. Because when I felt that terrible pain, that is when I hold on to my faith and go back to God. It was healing. The pain was too much… I felt so empty. I felt that no one can ever understand and listen to me without judging me but God. I had an honest confession to God after a loong time. I felt renewed and refreshed. It is my faith and hope that is keeping me moving with my life right now.
I realized that what I had with my ex was not love. I wasn’t grieving for my lost love but I was grieving for my lost self. I was wrong for punishing myself and closing my doors for love. I let him go because he couldn’t understand how much I love my family and that I don’t take my responsibilities lightly. I didn’t want to marry him without his parent’s acceptance. I want him to consider his parents in our situation. Parents and family are everything to me. You can never be a good parent someday if you yourself do not respect your parents. I asked him to wait for me, at least for 2 yrs until I fulfill my dreams for my family and for him to get his parent’s understanding of our relationship. But it didn’t work out for him he couldn’t wait. He left and moved on without me. I was hurt when I found out he got married and never confide to anyone.I was almost suicidal. I buried the pain in my heart and moved on. I ran away and went to a far country for wrong reasons. Then Mr. Scorpio happens.
After he dumped me and destroyed my ego. I tried to feel what is there left in me for him. I still do care for him. I can feel that he is going through hard times. I sent him a note saying that “whatever happens between us I am and will always be here for you.” I already allowed him to enter my heart even if he walks away and take everything back for his self preservation. He won’t be able to take that away from me. As the days pass by, the feeling is growing. It scares me because it is too late. He already made up his mind.
…….Then have a good cry, pamper yourself with gentleness and understanding, as those are the keys to finding all of the answers you need…….
Cry… I honestly want to cry. I cried when I pray not because of Mr Scorpio but because when I pray, I pray like a child reaching out to his parent. I still haven’t cried for what he did to me. I wanted to cry on the day he dropped the bomb itself. Usually when I cry it helps me get over the pain easily. But there were just no tears. I know it’s crazy but I don’t want to get over him!
My MIND says whatever connection you felt with him was not real. You know the song “The man who can’t be move” is an illusion. Scorpio guys are good in making that connection to their prey. They make you feel that connection and take you to where they intended to be, only to indiscriminately walk away as though nothing has occurred. But my HEART says NO! What drives him away is not the absence of emotion, but the overwhelming presence of it. He grows distant from me not because of hatred or indifference but because of fear. Fear that the hurt gets greater as he gets closer.
I want my heart to make more sense than my head because I love him. This admission is tough. I never expected I would fall in love again. I want to let him know and I want to make him feel how much I love him. But he is very cold… How to touch a cold Scorpio without getting stung? 🙂
I missed him and I missed the times that we almost shared. That is the emotionally draining part…….
…….You had been tested. Much more than he would have liked, and you failed……
Does it mean it ends there? This new found faith in me is saying this is just the beginning….
“… After he dumped me and destroyed my ego. I tried to feel what is there left in me for him…”
Count those destructive penetrations as meaningful blessings. (If his intent had goodness). Most women will never grasp the manifestation of changing, evolving psychological emotions/feelings thanks to a powerful expression from an instinctive male soul. Women want “the ease & comfort” of their fickle daily illusions back.
“…Does it mean it ends there? This new found faith in me is saying this is just the beginning…”
You had described knowing only about 1% of him. I love that perception. As with an enormous glacier, you see the surface and buoyance of the personality, yet the deeper reality of soul remains submerged in the abyss (the Hidden).
That’s the point of the journey Lovemari. Dissolving the cluttered ego – means merging that “death” into heart and soul.
The ‘new beginning’ will depend much on you. Your capacity to be fluid (not stubborn) and brave when ambivalence rips your ego reality apart. He talks and thinks future because he can already ‘see’ who you are ‘beneath’ (how fitting) the bullshit of ego attachments. He knows your essence, he feels the simplicity of your divine feminine qualities. Yet that stubbornness, which is in truth… a searing fear of inward-change or catharsis.
You’ll have to realize what makes you stubborn, what makes you feel vulnerable… because if you were to risk laying your soul bare to him, he would be moved by that, he would know you are capable of flying free “with” the eagle. Shed insecurities such as “rejection” and “distrust”. Why?… well, when one is spiritually in relationship with the greatest forces far beyond ones petty ego-self… one realizes that they are eternally loved and approved by that higher-power. No man or woman should ever define your connection with the Source flowing through all.
If he has deleted you from his soul, I would advise moving on spiritually, with greater awareness, and finding self-love first. An unequaled relationship with yourself first. That kind of self-love and acceptance you see, has nothing to do with outside influences (people) and their estimation of you.
Hi Lovemari…
“You had been tested. Much more than he would have liked, and you failed.”
If we were to take this literally, then we would be falling into one of the illusions that is Maya.
So I will put it into another way, slightly different from P.Puppy.
What you failed is to understand…yourself and what it means to have connection, beyond yourself.
I know, keeping a state of “UNDERSTANDING” and not falling into polar “pass or fail” is really hard, because you get all of these feelings of “helplessness”, “impotence”, and generally “feeling real bad” ..because you could actually believe that there is such thing as failing.
You are not perceiving the CHRIST energy in its full strenth.
This is the EGO battling – so shame on you if you fell back down to these terrible states of being as this is the REAL SIN. (huge smack on the booty).
You must stand your ground in humility and gratitude, and not permit yourself to be overwhelmed by the collective maya that you subconsciously perceive in the “air that vibrates”. It will only bring you down.
Your connection to yourself is one thing, but to fail in your connection to GOD is another.
Therefore, maintain that state of PEACE – and get over your EGO.
Under this scenario, I surely would have done terrible things to myself and others, because I failed – and could not re-establish myself.
It is all energy – and energy NEVER fails.
Applying this “cosmic” truth here on earth means “forgiveness” and all of those other “nerdy” religious words that have been abused and contorted.
Energy flows out, instead of in.
Are you starting to see that “Forgiveness” on earth…means something different cosmically? These words are KEYS or INSTRUCTIONS. They were not chosen randomly.
It is one of the hardest lessons to learn, because of its “easyness” and beautiful simplicity.
You would “think” that forgiveness is “submissive”…
You should see the energy that it releases.
Connection is sacred – and NOT to be depended on.
Therefore, it is to be honoured by the BEST in you, and not to be used as an emotional bandaid. (covers up the boo boo and makes it look pretty, but it is still there, until you heal the wound”)
Connection to Mr. Scorpio, is NOT an absolute and final state of being.
The Absolute understands DUTY. Therefore, connection is really NEVER broken. Under the Absolute, the connection IS.
Are you able to see the I AM VERB part described in the bible applied to “connection”?
Therefore, connection itself, does not have dualism – and it is NOT polar. However, if it is Polar, do or die, pass or fail, without soulful understanding and beauty of the Absolute…
Then I would not want it.
So, perhaps Lovemari, you must strive to understand…
Who and What has enough POWER to really break a connection? And what are you really giving POWER to?
Pain (EGO) is just a silly side effect, in this scenario.
Also…
Women often look in the wrong place for Scorpionic connection.
If he is evolved – he has duality. Meaning…he is inside and outside.
Look in your heart…and look into the air.
He is there. The air vibrates with his Phoenix presence.
Can´t feel it? Then you must work on yourself. Otherwise, you are draining him.
Which one should be more stronger?
This depends on what women empower. How he makes HER feel, or WHO he REALLY is.
This kitty cat could curl up and fall asleep with Mr. Phoenix glowing all around her. (sleepy meow…purring contentedly…stretch)
Women can not have it both ways I am afraid. But when you truly love (and don´t take off yer panties)…
There is only ONE way!
Hi JoJo…
“That’s when I know I had “died” before, I had felt so much pain, then, the pain stopped, I felt like separated from my body, sitting in a bubble of shielding, watching my corpse float in the pool of dark death one inch under my feet”
“What death through pain gave me, is freedom from fear of that pain… I know if I gotten through it, it no longer has a hold on me, ever… pain does not scare me once it did”
No words to explain the importance of these sentences…no earthly words that is.
All means to BE in it, body, soul, heart, mind, time, possession…utter openness…everything and anything, 100% all there from both the woman and the man, Nothing means, if one can’t be all in there, then in essence, one is not there at all, nothing.
Then the person you love will be very blessed. There was one Scorpio guy that connected to me. I had felt this same person in my dreams, almost 3 years ago – everything that I ever soulfully wanted. He was just there…a dream. A presence. But that was more than enough for me to go on. I don´t know why this guy did what he did, but when he connected with me, I was told that I had to choose. I stand by my choices and the incredible pain that they are currently giving me, because I made them with the best in myself and not the worst. Funny how the best always gives you unbearable pain.
“But when I know I’m nothing… I would never “connect” to another being… because when nothing is tested and the “can’t be there” fact shows itself in various forms, the pain from the disconnect is not something I wish on anyone.”
Hope the person you love knows that – before connecting. Otherwise it feels like a bomb coming from the skies. Establishing connection – the act itself, is very impersonal and cold – to the person that feels their astral environment. There really is no love in it. So it feels like something just invaded you. Alien surgery is more akin to the feeling.
What would the man and woman in a dynamic DO in such a situation? The cold word of integrity means, someone will not sleep around behind your back no matter what, no matter what she feels come hell or high water.
Yes…
My marriage was hell – but I gave as much as I could to a man that would kill me if I did not do as he said. But God had another plan for me…I had to choose my physical death…or Duty. It is an incredible thing to have the physical life of someone in your hands…is it not?
A Scorpio connecting to me – is like tasting heaven and coming home but having to say “no”. The bitterness of being “something” is also a lesson to be learnt – just as much as with “connection”. I guess “hell or high water” just keeps on coming, whether I like it or not.
“I know the pain of being betrayed this way to a man is a pain worse than death…and yes, she will leave his ass for sure, but she will not betray a husband this way.”
My criteria for “betrayal” is when someone is going to kill me or my kids. My husband took out the guns and started pointing them at the children. The family started warning me to “GET OUT”, because he is going to Kill you!!! Psychologists started telling me “Mrs…your husband is a psychopath”…
I ran out at 11:30 in the evening, after my husband tried to kidnap the kids. I took the important things for survival…
1. High heel shoes – because I had to work – I know, so vain!
2. Two computers – because the kids had to be entertained
3. A hair dryer – because my daughter had long hair
4. A hand blender – because I had to cook for the kids
5. Extra clothes…for work and for the kids
And the most important thing…
6. A coffee machine – because I love coffee.
The truth is, I grabbed anything that was near and stuffed it in the bag. I was not the most logical.
Then I took the guns…and took them apart. I separated the cartridges from the the bullets…and then took the rest of the gun parts and spread them all over the house.
Maybe someone got a bullet in their oatmeal the next morning.
“she will disregard you when you no longer is the person she FEELS for”
A typical arguement with kitty cat and Scorpio…
Cat: You never talk
Mr. S: I am not good at talking. (final and absolute statement…)
…silence…he has gone back to his “cave”.
Cat: Then I will have to figure you out the other way – you don´t mind do you? I will just “dream” you out. You are always there anyways.
Next day…
Cat: Why did you not tell me?
Mr. S: Another one of those innocent looks…
Cat: She is feeling really hurt now…
“You want me to “deal with you, now?”. Why should I just let myself go and “feel” when it was you who had always planned to leave? Where is YOUR something – if I don´t do what you want?” Oh yeah – you will move on.
She knew this one year ago. But she decided to be “something” and keep her own pain silent. She sees the truth now.
Hi Lovemari…
I seem inspired today…I be hearing the music!!!
“Love is giving; love is when you are willing to risk it all, when you are willing to give everything and expecting nothing in return.”
No – Love can not be defined. It can only be expressed. We have “lower” and “higher” ways to express love. It is not all sex, passion, and since we are talking about Scorpio…more sex…and more passion.
They may master their own sexual energy, but they don´t “live” on it. They DO go to the BATHROOM and do number one and two! Hahahaha!!!
Kindness…gentleness…consideration…a smile…a goofy act…humanity…honesty…a pot belly…the cellulite…our imperfections…our strengths, self consciousness…wrinkling your nose…getting confused…dancing to a song…
“I was looking for an assurance and show me that things would be ok if we will embark on a journey together regardless of our distance, cultural differences, his parents and etc.”
Well, looking for assurance in yourself…won´t get you any assurance. Looking for assurance in HIM – gosh darn it girl – that is pretty heavy!
As I have said – trying to “limit” your expression of love by “defining it”, will get you exactly that.
“I am very stubborn person. Not even a Scorpio guy can penetrate that. It has to come naturally.”
I would like you to feel that stubborness is the wrong word – perhaps you do not “understand” yourself and are intolerant to certain weaknessess.
For example…stubborness means that you will not move – until certain “things” are satisfied. Do you understand your own terms of engagement?
Once you do, try to expand them a bit so that you can grow and go beyond yourself. Maybe you will see the fear in yourself.
“He needs to bare his soul as well. I may have knowingly/unknowingly tested his patient and now he is gone.”
Patience can not be tested. Otherwise, it is not patience. I dunno what you tested girl – but patience was not it!
I was traveling without a heart, without a soul, I hated everyone and question God for my pain when he found me. His penetrating games annoy me.
Hmmmmm….this could be because you do not understand “battle” and what it means to fight for something.
I am starting to feel that I am just a “whisp” of a person now…maybe I will fade away into the universe and become one with it, once I am all probed out. (secret smile)
“I will still ask him to dump me like how he amputates me out of his life. Because when I felt that terrible pain, that is when I hold on to my faith and go back to God.”
That is kind of toxic behavior.
I prefer pain.
“I felt that no one can ever understand and listen to me without judging me but God.”
To understand you truly, we would have to walk your journey. I can´t – but perhaps I can share some of the stuff I learnt on mine.
I have not felt that God judges – but then…I am not GOD.
“I let him go because he couldn’t understand how much I love my family and that I don’t take my responsibilities lightly.”
You felt he could not understand or did he say this? Someone who takes their responsibilities to heart is honourable and respectable. It indicates that you would not leave a person for a “quickie” or a “great passionate affair”, therefore, you should not be interfered with.
Scorpio normally does not have these issues, so it is strange that you say that he could not understand.
“Scorpio guys are good in making that connection to their prey. They make you feel that connection and take you to where they intended to be, only to indiscriminately walk away as though nothing has occurred.”
This seems a bit mean spirited…something did occur. You just have not felt it. There is more to this life than what is perceived by us. Strive to go beyond anything that you have currently said.
“I want to let him know and I want to make him feel how much I love him.”
Darn Scorpio – he already knows! But it may not make a difference to your situation.
They run to a different tune…or universe. Well, maybe they don´t run…they fly.
Nah…THEY BE
Bela,
“I let him go because he couldn’t understand how much I love my family and that I don’t take my responsibilities lightly.”
You felt he could not understand or did he say this? Someone who takes their responsibilities to heart is honourable and respectable. It indicates that you would not leave a person for a “quickie” or a “great passionate affair”, therefore, you should not be interfered with.
Scorpio normally does not have these issues, so it is strange that you say that he could not understand.
I was talking about my EX Boyfriend on this one… not Mr Scorpio.
Okey dokey…
This makes sense now because I have seen various Scorpios be very protective and gentle towards children – but they are strict when it comes to “children´s games”.
“…This makes sense now because I have seen various Scorpios be very protective and gentle towards children – but they are strict when it comes to “children´s games”
I’m not a biological father but I could easily be good one. It’s funny, because each womanly girlfriend I’ve been involved with has felt like my bratty little sister… or a testy daughter. I’m talking full grown, attractive women who think they’ve got the world in their hand. With me, my energy, they eventually wilt and turn into a bunny without a cause. Where’s the “independent toughie” then?… LoL
Whereas… actual children, are a different dimension inwardly compared to adult kids. From a high spiritual plane or consciousness, innocence does link them together. An infant’s ego has not yet crystallized. Death doesn’t kill an infant ego, including adult infant ego’s… BECAUSE… those young, innocent ego manifestations are INCAPABLE of deep psychological death and surrender. Children’s un-developed ego, are oblivious to the internal gravity of emotional self-sufficiency, independent psychological survival, brave self-responsibility and social/moral consequence. The vast majority of Children 0-12 years of age will always get a free pass in my world… up until their early teenage years. Children’s “Games” with adults, are natural developmental necessities, they are blind to anything else. Yet…by their early teen years I would crack the whip and guide by example, building upon the example I had developed “in them” as babies with every deed, relatedness, love, discipline and thought of MY behavior. I would see their ego perceptions growing, their self-esteem self-questioning, their peer pressure affecting them, their social image defining their hearts souls and their cultural inclinations taking adult-like shape.
Women are little girls (inward bunnies) in the world of Pluto Puppy. Even the most brazen, independent man-eaters ‘think’ that they can control me. Sure, they definitely do control weak men, (bank account, looks, job, does not define strength) as the spider waits for her prey to get stuck in her sinister, self-interested web. I guess “sinister” get’s old for me. Games UN-fulfill me. They’re too predictable, dull and simply not interesting. Games (in adults) diminish personal development. When the heat turns on high, I usually scorch a wiley feminine flower when all I am doing is BEING me.
I wish to add:
… Most importantly, infants, toddlers, children… express their worlds with Honesty. They do. Even if their parents or guardian perceives that expression “as a lie”. The child’s reality is not the parents reality, remember… “Vicariously living” through each other cannot define honesty.
Adult children however, are far from honest. That’s why relationships, relating to people from all walks of life are so scarey to most people. People are cautious of feeling safe and openly talking with someone who affects them. An adult person naturally does not know the mind or heart of the other person, yet on deep, powerful subconscious levels people DO know that an adult ego is toxic, has a damaged past on some level, can be nad has been elusive and untrustworthy from past Vicarious Interactions…. because people unconsciously know that “life is a game” from their superficial context.
Ego, stubbornness…
Yah I’m working on that. I just need be a girl… enough of the control and arrogance.
“…Does it mean it ends there? This new found faith in me is saying this is just the beginning…”
“…The ‘new beginning’ will depend much on you…”
I couldn’t agree more. When I say new beginning… a sense of newness of me living again… with my faith to GOD, love for myself, people who inhabits my world and the life that I have. Redemption, forgiveness and happiness are right here where I fell and destroyed. I will rise from here and realize how blessed I am. I thank God for everything even for the all pain and sufferings.
“…If he has deleted you from his soul, I would advise moving on spiritually, with greater awareness, and finding self-love first…”
“…I want to let him know and I want to make him feel how much I love him…”
“….Darn Scorpio – he already knows! But it may not make a difference to your situation…
“…They run to a different tune…or universe. Well, maybe they don´t run…they fly…”
I love him because I love him.
If it means letting the eagle fly.. I will let him fly and watch him from the ground keeping all the lessons he taught me when I crashed.
There are no relationships that are waste; this is just another page of my life and the next chapters are still unwritten. If there are pages turned there are lessons learned. He was sent to me to make me understand things or maybe to help me heal my broken soul.
“…..Count those destructive penetrations as meaningful blessings. (If his intent had goodness)……”
Exactly! It doesn’t even matter what his intentions were. What matters is what I have become and what I have realized. How I perceive and make use of this experience to make me a better person. There are pains that are meant to be felt to help you create your self again.
“He was sent to me to make me understand things or maybe to help me heal my broken soul.”
Welllllll…I have my feelings on this one.
Your soul was never broken…this sounds the same as “failure exists”…and that you can “test patience”. He was not “sent” – he “came”…
These statements hide truer truthes!
HE IS…and YOU ARE.
“It doesn’t even matter what his intentions were. What matters is what I have become and what I have realized.”
“How I perceive and make use of this experience to make me a better person.”
Now strive to go beyond what you have just written. Can you see that what you perceive, is actually “NOT the COMPLETE TRUTH?”. So, what are you going to “go on?”. What you know or what you don´t?
Knowledge or Faith? Arrogance or humility? All or nothing?
Under these circumstances, an option is to fall into the unknown with love guiding you. instead of hatred, or fear).
But don´t be stubborn, because MOVE you MUST.
It ALL matters…but did you just stand by…or did you STOP the illusion? Under your own perception or did you HONOUR his divinity?
I am reminded of a comment from JoJo…
“you are not that little old lady who hands out her last dim to the unfortunate, you are the man who kept his last dim but vow to himself to come back one day to rebuilt the town with EVERYONE in it and does.”
I may be a “Bun Bun”, but I ain´t no “Dumb Dumb”…
Woman should learn to be woman again, in order to permit the men in this world to be the glorious, divine beings that they are. Strangely, we really should “revere” each other and place our egos and private parts on the back burner.
Honour…love…attend…nurture…have compassion, understand…seek justice…use your wisdom…fight hell…embrace heaven…be the witch…the sorceress…the magician…the healer…use the best of yourself under God´s grace and the divine Tools that God gave you and SEE your man´s soul…and not his penis / EGO.
Boy, alot of women are going to be angry at me. But women need to “woman up”.
“I love him because I love him.
If it means letting the eagle fly.. I will let him fly and watch him from the ground.”
Well, there seems to be something “not right” with this one –
It goes along the lines of the following:
Would someone who has had an incredible journey, want that journey to be reduced to “watching the eagle fly” and a woman being “in-love” with him, waving with a hankie “Go Eagle…yay!!!”?
This seems a bit “NOT Scorpio”…after all that he did in “stalking you”?
The darkness (unknown) calls…and beckons…
Just some thoughts…
Puppy,
I can’t…
I look towards the future and I just automatically tense up…it has become a reflex, I feel it, my being is tensing up prepared for more pain…for never been good enough the way I am, for the flight that is never an invitation but an exam, for eyes looking into me watching for things need to be changed, for the nightmare of my past, for things I’ve constantly felt and don’t want to feel anymore…
My experience with Scorpio men, brought me nothing but pain, I can’t believe love is all about pain…my feelings tells me I can’t believe in them… moonbeams and rainbows…they are not in my reality, they are in a store with a price tag…
Best things are free…I…just have to keep looking…
Delete me.
Gatubela,
Please stop obsessing about me, I’m a human being, I have feelings, I’m not a case study, be kind and find silence in yourself.
“…I can’t believe love is all about pain…”
The root of that psychology is that you shouldn’t “believe” love is about pain. That belief is why you swim in confused, dependent, emotional pain. Feelings are not intellectual compartments. Thinking about pain will grant you what? Pain.
Hell is between the ears. Pain is not in another man, unless you buy into his false heaven. Then you become his pain. Individualize your emotions, learn from them. See your inner-being, the way you inherit fears from others.
Your understanding of what it means to transform and become emotionally independent has nothing to do with believing love is pain. That “psychology” of ones emotional reality is light years off the mark.
That is your reality.;)
Your path JoJo was never designed to be my path. And mine yours.
Find a man who will accept you just the way you are. I’m sure there is no shortage of suitors.;)
The man of my dreams…but he only exists in my dreams.
Hi JoJo…
I seem to have been the cause of pain…which pains me more than you know.
Please don´t feel pain – I am very sorry that I could have contributed to it.
I will not be back to cause any further harm.
This it… be kind to me, find silence in yourselves, I won’t read anything from this blog anymore. Thank you.
Jojo,
love the song! “He heals me”
The man of every girl’s dream…
Thanks for bringing me into this song.
Gosh! I’m teary eyed and I’m in office..
Well – just in case that JoJo does come back – I would like to say that I accept and understand her pain – as well as her point of view.
One part of me can not stand to be the cause of pain for anyone. It somehow affects my soul and makes me crumble with feeling unaccepted and extremely vulnerable. Everything becomes questioned. The good that I try to do, doing the best with the little that I have. But they are gifts from God. And I did not receive them to be wasted on my “self pity party”.
So…I don´t give in to “flight”…something inside me is there…and actually, it won´t move. For me…there is something called “non-movement” and it is just as powerful as “movement”.
So…Scorpionic energies are not meant to be wasted on “pain” and empowering it. Actually, they are to be used to “erradicate” the causes of.
My son is a mercury in Scorpio…and I have seen him under so much pain, that he looses himself in it and hurts himself. Sending everyone to “hell”…saying hurtful things…not based on truth, but based on his perception of my caring for him…You are not my son…but I do know that not being able to stablize yourself is very critical. The last thing that should be done, is to “delete” a person…or that you should “flight”…under any circumstances. What I am doing for you is nothing compared to what I have done for my children…but the last thing that I did do, was give in to my pain. I transformed it into “ACTION” – the best actions under honourable intentions possible.
I do have a vision…and a heart…and feelings to!
So, in my attempt that your pain does not get you in the ass- curtesy of Mr. Hades…I am going to be honest with you.
Pain is something was so usual for me for 15 years. Actually, compared to the other terrible states of being that I have had to “live” under, pain is very manageable. I say this, because I have gone through it and I know that you can too. You still have your heart and soul…so there is no excuse for you and you giving in to your pain.
So don´t try to pull one over me. An obsessed person can´t walk away. But a person with a higher purpose, will also stick by you as well.
So…ignoring the astrology in this…and looking at you as a person…
“Get up…and face yourself and the cause of your pain. Be honest with yourself and stop running.”
” I feel it, my being is tensing up prepared for more pain…for never been good enough the way I am, for the flight that is never an invitation but an exam, for eyes looking into me watching for things need to be changed, for the nightmare of my past, for things I’ve constantly felt and don’t want to feel anymore…”
We all have misbehaved…are misbehaving…and will misbehave.
Also…we all have tried to be better…are becoming better…and will be better…
Non-movement …is when the assasins (your past) come out to “kill” you and you react by harmonizing yourself in your mind and becoming one with your surroundings and feeling LIFE. Your past is after you…but it will not see you…because death and life…are one.
Pain, sufferings… come on guys… cheer up!!!! Lets all go out tomorrow Friday night have fun! Go shopping, watch a movie, visit the spa have a good massage and then eat italian food! There are so much more to life than bitterness and pain.
By the way I need to go have fun now cuz Mr Scorpio said he will call me over the week end and talk about things. Who knows what kind of bomb he’s going to drop over the week end. Let me enjoy life before I die again lol! kidding!
Hi Lovemari,
“Let me enjoy life before I die again.”
or
“Let me enjoy death before I live again.”
Fun…what´s that?
Just joking!
I usually work…and have more work to do…
Writing here actually is my time to share and care…and be me.
I admire your “get up and go fer it”!
Love is not about pain…at least that has not been my experiences.
Pain is about pain…and love is about love.
Why mix up the two?
Pain can be inflicted by another person…or can be felt internally by your own. Conflict with a state of love or “soul”, may cause pain.
For me…pain is a blessing. What if you did not feel it? I prefer tears and boohoos…because I am growing. In that sense, it gives me relief that I really am not such a bad person. It gives me hope that I am “something”. It is my teacher.
But it must be consciously seen for what it is…in yourself, by getting to know what “motivates” you to greatness.
So…how can I explain?
Everytime you are loosing attachment, it is going to hurt…and being attached is co-dependency.
What fills in the gap between not having attachment and not being co-dependent?
You won´t feel the Truer states behind our earthly interpretation of “love in your heart” unless you have faced your very own survival.
Meaning you may have to learn one of those silly religious words…as a result of something bad.
“Flight” is when you really are NOT committed to resolving your own “conflicts” which are surfacing up.
Unless you are choosing Flight as a way to Fight! But this does not seem so in your comments.
So under the scorpionic spiritual zinger, you will be forced to loose your attachments. Since we are all imperfect and have certain attachments…we are all going to “fail” all of our tests…with each other. Why? Because once we are out of our comfort zone…we “disappear”.
So what should keep us together? Funny how alot of our problems are because we feel isolated and misunderstood.
We would be a better society if we could read eachother minds! Imagine the “cleansing effect” that would have on us!!! Very spiritual!
The arguements would change from selfish bickering and survival issues to:
Cat: Looks at Mr. S.
Mr. S: Looks at Cat.
Agreement…understanding…compassion…trust…tolerance…purity…openess…
Perrrrobbbblemmmmm RESOLVED!!! Between Cat and Scorp…and why not include the REST of the WORLD too!!!
Well, this is a bit of an exagerrrrationnnn!!! But you get my idea?
Openess instead of pain or suffering, could actually be more powerful for our spiritual growth.
Children are like that.
So you need to see what would alleviate your pain…and decide if it is Who you want to Be during your time left here on this earth.
I will be kind to you…but I will also have faith in you.
I could be silent…but you have already seen that I won´t.
I hope you don´t get mad.
The arguements would change from selfish bickering and survival issues to:
Cat: Looks at Mr. S.
Mr. S: Looks at Cat.
Difficult for me because of the distance. We can only talk online or over the phone.. Haizz. things would have been different if we are living in the same place. In my case it would the Bull & Mr S 🙂
Cat: You never talk
Mr. S: I am not good at talking. (final and absolute statement…)
…silence…he has gone back to his “cave”.
Cat: Then I will have to figure you out the other way – you don´t mind do you? I will just “dream” you out. You are always there anyways.
Next day…
Cat: Why did you not tell me?
Mr. S: Another one of those innocent looks…
Cat: She is feeling really hurt now…
“You want me to “deal with you, now?”. Why should I just let myself go and “feel” when it was you who had always planned to leave? Where is YOUR something – if I don´t do what you want?” Oh yeah – you will move on.
She knew this one year ago. But she decided to be “something” and keep her own pain silent. She sees the truth now.
Is it easier/better to keep your silence than to ask him directly to talk and explain the truth? Throw all unthrown stones even if it is going to hurt. Like sting me some more for me to realize that its time to let the eagle fly…
“Openess instead of pain or suffering, could actually be more powerful for our spiritual growth.”
Openess with ourselves first –
The moment he stung you…is the moment when the eagle has flown away.
What is left is for you to deal with the poison.
So…can you change his EGO? Nope.
Can you change his SOUL? Nope.
So what can you change? Yourself!
Don´t do it for him…the reason being is that we are all imperfect and always changing. So what we are today may be different from what we will be tomorrow?
Don´t believe me?
You were a baby once and had trouble doing your basic necesities…and I am sure that you are different now.
We will “fail” all of our tests with eachother due to lack of spiritual connection when the “desert” hits you…meaning, you will be without “stimulating” stimuli to motivate you and occupy your mind.
I actually understand “desert” conditions. You begin to see things differently…in my case, the lack of “life” in everything. The junction or crossroads of “life and death” is a very powerful feeling to see.
You are rising and sinking at the same time…living and dying…actually, it does seem a bit tortuous to be so close to such beauty…but can not manifest it here.
On a personal note:
Life is not easy and “unfair” shit does happen. So…when it does, don´t sit down and wait for “external” forces to solve your problems.
You have to see the “stones” that you have got.
Even if those stones are laced with delicate feminine virtue and innocence.
So…I was just trying to see different sides of your situation.
If we were not talking about Scorpionic energy…I perhaps would have been a bit more softer.
I am also talking about the idea of “wanting to change someone” and the controlling energies that this entails.
The most easiest thing to to, is to not do anything. But if you have the opportunity to talk to Mr. Scorpio, and it feels right…then go for it!!!
Comunication – based on honesty, is wonderful. Perhaps it will be transformative between you and him. You seem to have alot of “spark” in you – and I am sure that Scorpio would appreciate these energies.
I also want to mention that you have “intuition” already…so do you trust what your “gut” is telling you? Does a part of you feel that you have options?
Looking at your Scorpio – it is difficult to imagine what he might be going through. But I have to say Scorpios are individuals that HAVE to follow another “piper”, due to their incredible sensetivity.
Meaning, he may have to resolve some inner issue and “burn” it out.
While this is happening, he will not want to be distracted…or rather…he won´t be distracted from it.
So…his issues at the moment, could be not focussed on you…as yours seem to be on him. You may be “provoking” a transformational response, but that response is separate from you. He may not “need” communication from you, as what he sees is more than sufficient and actually more trustworthy than any words you can say.
So…if we were perfect, we would not have any problems as we would have complete access to the truth and just not parts of it. We would be able to handle all situations with ease. Absolute security and seemingly in power.
This is not the case in your situation…so are you able feel like you are nothing? This is like falling blindly into something you don´t know.
Therefore, your doubts and insecurities are not being caused by him. They are being caused by your “lack” of strength in a certain area of yourself.
When you decide to communicate with him, you must be aware of this…and understand the feelings that are surfacing within yourself.
So…if you were silent, what would that silence mean to you? What is the problem of being “stung”…why this fear?
Perhaps it is because I have literally walked through the desert (that was my marriage) and found my light. But there is no such thing as a sting…if you are not attached to what “weakness” that is being surfaced through these very powerful energies.
Release it. Trust yourself…believe in yourself…and seek the truth in yourself as much as you can.
When talking to Scorpio…being truthful will aleviate that “Yer just a goat or a deer” in my talons feeling.
Even eagles gotta eat…and that makes them “co-dependant” on something.
Breath…and feel….
Yeah it’s advisable not to mess with us… especially when we’re hungry.
This event is pure greatness.
how is persephone?
where is persephone??
Hi Umm,
I could not finish watching the mouse one…
Have you seen condors? I have seen them in the Andes Mountains.
The ancients, their occult knowledge knew what their Persephone delight was, she was… a Virgo. How perfect Ummm… your divine ancient nature is the epitome of Persephone… meaning…Virgin earth, oblivious to ‘death’ and the subterranean wealth unknown to her in Hades kingdom. Until of course Hades (the potent energy on many levels) ‘abducts’ her (you) from ‘the surface’ of your playful illusions.
Persephone’s fearful mother… Demeter… is also “of pure earth” and she represents the symbolism of either Taurus or Capricorn nature.
LoL, I laugh because “the Goat” in evolutionary/astrological terms is Capricorn… the social “climbers” via “the material” plane known world of career, people and things.
The Eagle Consciousness, eliminated those Goats “reality of things”… by injecting their necks with talons, death (Hades) and then dropping them off the cliff-face knowing those Goats had no wings.
Eagles do not abuse the power they were given by the Maker. They use their Liberty, Ethics and Justice, and the Higher-Self…Super-Consciously… Spiritually… Immortally.
However… when we see ‘the Shadow’ of man manifesting itself from “the Scorpion” death blow… the Lower-Self, we see… murder, larceny, deception, greed, rape, self-hate/fear, abuse, corruption, psycho-emotional force, aggression and control over others. We see the sheer abuse of power (e.g hitler, stalin, Castro etc… so we begin to truly see and understand what “evolution really means” from a humane, loving soul perspective.
Many Scorpionic natured people, btw — (EVERY human being has Scorpio/Hades in their Nature) cannot transcend their Lower-Nature and evolve from the ground dwelling “survival desire” from the out of control “animal sex desire”, from the “let’s go shopping and accumulate tons of stuff so i can feel happy and safe desire”.
The Eagle soars above it all.
Notice the intense watchfullness of the Eagle. Their laser-like vision “to See” over the earth and the lunacy of all God’s creatures scurrying below.
Apart from the Eagle’s freedom to spread his wings… he has psycho-emotional weapons (power) Higher Consciousness… far greater than the Scorpion ‘attacking for survival’ will ever know or understand.
The Scorpion (within humans) gets a karmic squash by mans boots;)
“fearful mother”… yeh you got that right.
she’s a scorp too. with a cap moon. sigh..
there’s an eclipse in scorpio moon approaching.
oh fun oh joy.
im building the flying boat. just like the eagle i can see lots from up there.you can hop in when your wings get tired and i’ll make you a nice dish of rabbit hot pot
oh great there’s a massive comet heading straight towards the boat. fanbloodytastic.
The Lower-self Scorpion manifesting within human beings ALSO has at their disposal “an intense vision or stare”… yet their is a very important distinction between vice and virtue in lower-self and higher-self that I wish to emphasize here in meta-physical terms.
The Scorpionic influenced-motivated lower-self manifests itself such as: “Underworld activity”… e.g the Mafia, John Gotti, Al Capone, the IRS, Bernie Madoff, Corporate America – white collar racketeering, fraud, embezzelment, cheating, scaming, intimidations, social/sexual abuse… are all gifted deceptions and lies in which “manifest” in people by vice of their ancient nature known as, the lower-animal-self.
So an intimidating glare, an intensity exuding from a strong sexual male presence can be both… devil OR angel.
What distinguishes the Eagle from the Scorpion??
I’ll tell you what it does not distinguish. It is not the level of “intelligence”… it ain’t lack of “social influence”… it is not the ability to use “finacial power” over others.
Yep, you knew it.
The orign exists in that ancient energy known as — Motivation.
cripeys its a huge comet and its covered in sparklers. sparklers?
I imagine that Persephone would be immune to Hades death stings, through understanding it with her own dark soul.
Her tears make her remember of the innocence she once had.
She wanted to die last night…and I guess she did.
To feel such exquisite beauty when life dies and death lives…simultaneously inside of her, to form a moment zero ego moment of truth and beauty.
Where they meet…is to feel exquiste pain and to feel overwhelming life…through love.
Hi Lovemari…
“So…his issues at the moment, could be not focussed on you…as yours seem to be on him.”
So follow your silent, soulful path of your integrity and virtue.
It takes you to inward journeys and not communicating until you have finished the burn.
You know what, I realized something today…. if you love painting, music, song/poem writing or any form of art. Fall in love to a scorpio man and let him take you to his roller coaster ride. This may sound crazy but this pain that I am feeling now is triggering my creativity in a very good way. Sometimes I don’t even want to get over it. Crazy! I love painting & music/playing instruments. am now doing things I used to love and enjoy.
yay lovemari! good crazy! me love painting and playing music too.what instrument do you play? art and music is a place where i feel free. free expression in pure form .. no need for words even.so good huh! and sometimes really bloody painful too. but it releases and heals. and lets me go beyond..
“…cripeys its a huge comet and its covered in sparklers. sparklers?…”
Umm that’s something a bunny would say. Sparklers, wow all you need now is a toffe apple, a hoola-hoop and a pair of pink sparkly shoes as you welcome the big fuzzy comet ball blazing it’s way straight into your chicken wing arms. Boo.
hmm sounds like something i would say.although hoolahoops sound like fun. but who said i was going to welcome the comet anyway? its coming my way and it may well kill me. and you for that matter. didnt you know that sparklers fizz for only so long.. chicken wing arms .hehe! well you must have turkey giblets for your arms then! hee. are we doomed??
take your eyes off my sequins (see im barefoot now much better anyway) grab hold off the rudder giblet boy we may just be able to steer us out if harms way .im going up the mast to get a see whats going on theres a bit of flapping going on
If the earth did evaporate thanks to a massive blast, I wouldn’t lose much sleep. I’ll still be keeping you warm in the next life and keeping you bouncing on those tippy toes through love.
shush we’re still alive. its not over yet. hand..on ..the ..rudder..
didnt i feed you enough rabbit?
oh was that my hand on the rudder?… it felt like your backside. swoop. I don’t feel like eating bunny tonight. Maybe I’ll just chomp on your hips a little bit… gently.
yes my skin is tender . gentle is nice. look the boat is turning . my backside is doing a fine job ( i could tell your hand needed a rest cant go letting you get cramp now in a crisis like this) and flapping has been secured -strong sail we have . wow the stars look so beautiful up here. think we might be ok
Hi Lovemari,
During my marriage, I was creative too!
Well, understand that within a struggle, usually there is a winner or a looser.
One will “die” and one “won´t”.
But you have found an alternative – and that is beautiful!
Hi Lovemari,
“Fall in love to a scorpio man and let him take you to his roller coaster ride.”
Yes, creativity steers you clear out of the mental life or death struggle.
Japanese Samurai culture understands these things very well. Although they did committ many atrocities.
A woman who has been dishonoured – must “die”. The reason being that her virtue is her “life”.
You will not understand these warrior principles until you come to realize that your failures can mean your honour – and your honour / virtue is your life. To loose it, is your “death” and you fall into EGO.
Duty is very important in these cultures.
Well, once you embark in following your own path of virtue, you will begin to see these very subtle energies. Your soul will start to reject anything that is not pure.
Creativity – is a good way to “die”. It is a good and honourable death.
We are not in these cultures, but perhaps Scorpio can understand them.
Hi P.Puppy
“The orign exists in that ancient energy known as — Motivation.”
I am not an expert in motivation – but it is the reason why we do things or the energy behind the verb?
If that energy rests on “ego”, then all of our actions are motivated by “nothingness”. The cycle of “destruction” comences. Scorpionic energies “intensify” this reality.
Therefore, our “deaths” are meaningless.
But if one is motivated by higher self, then our “bunny deaths” are very meaningful, and can change this world just by “being who we really are”.
The cycle of “creation” comences…
Meaning, under soulful motivation, the physical visible result of destruction or creation, is actually irrelavant…because destruction and creation / Life and death…
Are one.
The Ego will separate this force into “2” due to “what affects its survival and motivation”. If the motivation is “social status”, then anything that affects social status in a way that makes a person feel uncomfortable, is “destructive”. If something makes the social status more comfortable, then it is “creation”.
Therefore, more money motivates us…more social status motivates us. Destruction and nothingness…are very motivating factors at the moment.
Soulful motivation is a very uniting energy -but its visible effect as perceived under the EGO is only “destructive”. Or…as long as it really does not interfere with “survival” issues , being soulfully motivated deserves a nice pat on the head as a “good person”.
Therefore, we can expect our deaths in this war.
Soulful motivation contemplates the simultaneous and living in death and dying in life because the fundamental motivation and reason for it to be used is Love. Not the “I want a chocolate” love…but powerful forces filled with extasy.
…soulful extasy and joy is a motivation in itself.
Just some thoughts while performing those daily “I gotta slaugher me a salary” tasks.
Lose does not mean Loose.
Death ‘does’ have meaning.
The ancient Desire Instinct ‘does motivates’ our choices.
I feel you are over-complicating, fodder-optioning, and bamboozling the basis of some very simple Truths.;)
Truth is found/felt in silence.
I can only relate my personal experiences P.Puppy – and no more. The only thing I am “trying” to do, is put words to them.
Putting these truthes that I found in my silence for the last 15 years into words, may come across as…
“over-complicating, fodder-optioning, and bamboozling the basis of some very simple Truths.”
Yeah…thanks for telling me that.
Phhhhttttt – I stick my tongue out at your attempt in “simplicity” – using 3 adjectives and a total of 16 syllables.
Meanie.
LoL!!!
Meta-physically and evolutionarily speaking:
Once again – Destruction and Re-Generation (creation) are the Same. We need both. In our Life(s) and our Death(s)- which are also both the same energies. These energies are omnipresent – In Light (spiritual Consciousness) and in Dark (material/worldy Consciousness), again the Same. We “need Ego” to function and survive in physical form, regardless of how soulful, or how gentle, or how super aware we are for peace and non-Hades perfection. A Hades free earthly reality does not exist. It never has, and it was never supposed to be an Apllo Utopia.
Tell the Goats who lost their “meaning” of life climbing up high on those enormous mountains, the meaning ‘you’ are trying to convey with all of us here.
Would those Goats understand the non-meaning you are giving to their deaths?
Hey, you said death is meaningless. Just quoting your changing ideas.
“If that energy rests on “ego”, then all of our actions are motivated by “nothingness”. The cycle of “destruction” comences. Scorpionic energies “intensify” this reality.
Therefore, our “deaths” are meaningless.”
Yes, I can see why you said what you said…
Because the EGO will not be able to give meaning through its own death. The meaning is given through soul connection.
If soul connection is not attained…then we can expect more deception, more violence, more rapes..
I am speaking from personal experience. There is nothing that can be done with a person who does not “FEEL” his or her soul.
When their comfort level is affected, they will “kill” and destroy to get themselves more comfortable. To be at the mercy of someone like that…makes my death…meaningless.
Your life is converted to only a “Hades” reality as having an “EGO” is only adding more food for them to continue with their “matanza”.
This is compared to being at the mercy of someone who actually has soul connection. The experience is completely different.
Therefore meaning is given once soulful “truthes” are realized.
If you don’t feel meaning through death (change) you don’t feel any meaning in life (stagnation/illusion).
So if death has no meaning to you, life cannot glean meaning to you, knowing that both are unified… eternal energies. Therefore if your reality understands an existence with no God and believes in no manifestation of God, those opinions of your (our) existence is a conclusion atheism.
Now, to me… nothing is at all “wrong” with atheism or any other religion for that matter.. Why?… Because through my consciousness, the meaning I see/understand through our human existence, is inclusive of the understanding I see and feel for each human being and their own conceptualized/consciousness of their reality.
No right or wrong “thought”… as Shakespere beautifully understood.
But Consciousness itself… is Not thought OR opinion OR fact. That, I feel… is what Shakespere was trying to say to us.
“So if death has no meaning to you, life cannot glean meaning to you, knowing that both are unified… eternal energies.”
I did not mean to say that death has no meaning for me. Darn it, I need to speak in the third person!
Uhhhmmmmm….
One did not mean to imply that there is no meaning in death. Only that the perception of said death, can not have meaning obtained, under the chaotic, callous, souless whims of EGO itself.
Thank you for your corrections.
I was too rough on you Bella. I take back my meanieness. I do. When I look at your angle closely I see that you know much more than the average wabbit. My apologies…
… I’d like to add the following statement expressed from a “scientific”… “mathematical” genius known as – Albert Einstein.
“Imagination is (more important) than knowledge.”
Here’s a guy who was a brilliant mathematician. A scientist well advanced far beyond his time. Yet to me, he was also a Prophet.
His quote above is immortal, to me in the sense, because of the depth of it’s meaning. The meaning is non-logical, it’s meaning is non-factual… because if his statement above… and his theories were “factual” and “logical” and based on “reasoning” powers through scientific thought (math/physics)… he ‘would not have arrived’ at his Theory of Relativity.
In other words, his “belief” that Imagination is “more important” than Knowledge… defies all human mathematical intellect, wipes away all “human logic”, his comment defies all “human reasoning” and it defies all “factual evidence” as to how he reached the theory of relativity.
He “knew” that Imagination is Consciousness far… far beyond the literal intellect and it’s subsequent reasoning limitations could ever know.
His statement above tells us ‘how’ he did it.
What can I say… am so glad to ever find this site. I realized this blog were posted 4 yrs ago and still little bunnies keeps coming back to read more 🙂
Umm,
I play acoustic guitar! Its fun… Shakespeare said, “If music be the food of love, play it on” 🙂
I love painting too but stopped when I started doing job. When you get busy with daily job to survive you tend to forget things you used to love doing.
Now, am trying to spend quality time with myself and the best way to connect with myself is to do things I used to enjoy as a kid.
Seek inspiration in everyday life, even during trying times. How we spend our days is how we spend our lives.
Bela,
I am truly grateful for all your insights and advices. You never fail to respond to my posts and I admire your strength. Your kids are blessed to have you as their mother. God Bless you Bela…. hugs…
Pluto Puppy,
If you don’t feel meaning through death (change) you don’t feel any meaning in life (stagnation/illusion)
Death/extreme pain is not always bad… It can be something beautiful…
Thanks for spelling Shakespeare correctly LoveMari… my pelling was never sperfect as a chyld.
Yes… Bella, JoJo, Umm and all other bunnies who have contributed here should know they are special, tender and unique souls in their own lovable way.
Cheers… ** clink go the beer glasses.
I can not drink alcohol because I am missing an enzyme and can´t metabolize it.
But a “salud” just the same for everyone with a coke!
I am very grateful to have been able to contribute here.
People, I couldn’t help it. If this swooping specimen isn’t Hades (devil) with Wings (angel) reincarnated… I don’t know what is. No wonder women couldn’t trust a face like this. eerie. LoL
Hi P.Puppy,
Only a Scorpio can get away with using the present continuous tense, 3 verb string and 16 syllables (not ajectives actually) to get a point across…and make me laugh!
I have to respect the effort and creativity that it took to create such a perfect combination. Most people would have said:
“Look B. , you are full of @·%”
So, no apologies necessary – because everything you do, you put your heart into it.
I am not a “wabbit” !!!
Hi Lovemari and Umm,
I really like your artistic persuits.
I used to sing Jazz and was actually considered good enough to push for Broadway – I particulary loved to sing Gershwin, Scottish ballads and Les Misrables…
Since I have arrived to Latin America, I have not wanted to sing anymore.
Bella, I’ve always known you’re not a pink cotton-tail rabbit… this clip is why I love Leo women, their beautiful individuality and noble nature. These pictures speak louder than words ever could when it comes to Apollo affection. So I’ll try to keep my word-verb dynamo quartet down to a slim 15 syllables… just for you.
Hi P.Puppy,
Oooofffff! Ya got me! But this will have to be kept between me and you, alright? For the rest of the world, I am not a softie at heart.
Yes well, most of the time, eagles are flying high, all cool. When they descend, they also must be treated with love. The reason is that when they descend and put their independant “feeties” to waddle on earth, they are out of their element and feel a bit “wierd” and vulnerable.
They descend for a reason – and only because they must. I have a high respect for those reasons.
“… when they (Eagles) descend and put their independant “feeties” to waddle on earth, they are out of their element and feel a bit “wierd” and vulnerable. ”
That is a great perspective, and a very realistic one.
The earth and it’s literal plane, we human beings who habitat earth… we people and our “normal” conversations of material living, our socioeconomic psychology, which governs our earthly CONCEPTUALIZED IDENTITIES give “our meaning” over ones-life.
Do you all know what I see, when I waddle (uncomfortably, very true) on the earth plane?
I see and instinctually feel …. masses of “conformed identities” politicking, maneuvering, playing, wheeling, dealing and doing deeds amid thousands of different pragmatic areas “Institutionalized reality”.
What links all of these institutionalized drones, their actual motivations together?
The fundamental desire to – Survive. The ends always seem to justify the means.
Those “ends” from the superficial ego-brain, include the game of love, the game of family politics, the juvenile game of friendship politics, the narcissistic game and pure self-interest of money, the pure self-interest and power plays of career and everything else you can think of.
Welcome to the ground Eagle. If you don’t fly above it all, starving creatures desperate and fearful for their survival will devour you (your soul) while not thinking twice about their deeds.
For that is why the Eagle must kill, Justly.
Hi P.Puppy,
“Imagination is (more important) than knowledge.”
Yes…like I imagine that the planets and stars can actually “talk” to you. And you can “talk” through them, for them.
Sounds silly, but sometimes when I think of astrology, I feel that we have to get to know the planets and feel their energy.
When one can intensely and honestly observe people, including a merciless introspection of ones honest-self, one will begin to understand and see:
That parents live vicariously through their children, that children live vicariously through their parents. That friends live vicariously through their friends. That employees live vicariously through their employer’s philosophy. That students live vicariously through the “Institutions” of their school or university. That lovers live vicariously through their partner. That people of financial, political or social stature and relevance live vicariously through how others perceive them. From all vicarious influence we then see in ourselves an identity of nothing of who we are, but of who other people “think” we are.
What does this have to to with ground-stuck Godfearing people. Everything. Living vicariously through our peers, friends, siblings, parents, role-models and partners ‘means’ not establishing a spritual awareness, or spiritual surrender of ones ever repeating Shadow. So if one is oblivious to ones manifested Shadow, one does not know a higher-plane of spiritual existence beyond their own survival.
These groups of institutionalized, vicarious “identities” is what I see. They are threaded together in similar paradigm. It is rare for me, very rare… to meet an Individual Soul who has defeated the Origins of their own Shadow by virtue of their own volition or bravery. The Light perceived on pragmatic, literal levels as material achievement and social/political importance… ‘blinds’ a man of his spiritually aware failings. Most humans beings do not want to face the music of their own pain reality. Fear on deep subconscious levels dominates that option. Hence the illusions which manifest into superfical “hurt” and “imperfection” as other people have attempted to love that person through daily life.
Hi Umm,
Those songs took me awhile to feel and understand. But perhaps I understand them all too well.
This song reflects what is now going on between my soon to be ex husband and I. It is called “What have you done” by “Within Temptation”.
I could not stop him from doing what he did and being who he is. The silence I feel now in my soul, is the calm before the storm.
Hi P.Puppy,
Submitting to our shadow…requires balancing our shadow with our light. Our mental perceptions of this energy perverts it to the survival issues and very bad behavior as it short circuits the mind. Coming into contact with the shadow, soulfully, through raising our frequencies of interaction and maintaining ourselves in the path of silent integrity, allows us to perceive it more and more for what it REALLY is.
Therefore, we become our shadows, when we don´t surrender to it. The “shadow” is capable of killing for the lie by provoking the lie in the other person. The result is a castle buit on a foundation of lies.
Facing your shadow by first discipling the mind through integrity and then continuing in love, finally permits you to see what the mind blinded you to – cosmic energy.
It is ALL energy. No has been capable of applying a higher law in relatonship (thermo)dynamics in this earth that is more poweful than their own survival – not physical btw. As you have said, we need to have our “vicarious” wars.
It is not all killing – it is all energy. The highest law wins. Strangely, the highest laws require absolute submission to the cosmos. They are beautiful.
“… Therefore, we become our shadows, when we don´t surrender to it. The “shadow” is capable of killing for the lie by provoking the lie in the other person. The result is a castle built on a foundation of lies. Facing your shadow by first disciplining the mind through integrity and then continuing in love, finally permits you to see what the mind blinded you to – cosmic energy…”
Yes, exactly. Beautiful Bella. “It is ALL energy”… Yes indeed.
“… It is not all killing – it is all energy. The highest law wins. Strangely, the highest laws require absolute submission to the cosmos. They are beautiful….”
Yes very good understanding. What I mean when I say “killing”… is when those evoked or provoked states of intellect (*not soulful consciousness*) manifest from the ‘blinded person’ that becomes their self-fulfilling prophecy as “a reality of lies”… so the response(s) by the awakened, wise and stronger person “kills off” that energy of illusion via the enlightened souls vision, depth of personality, empathy of feeling, courageous/zealous integrity and clear mindfulness. The complex energy flowing through all life, through of all kinds of human socioemotional-realities… are learned and defined over time, evolving and discriminating inwardly through social/relational experiences on many extreme energies and not so extreme levels of relating.
I personally have changed/evolved as a man, thanks in part, to the intense lessons I have acquired through extreme and powerful relations. People teach me, deeply, every moment.
Great stuff Gatubela.
“Killing off” another persons false manifestations, expression or perceptions of a moment- also means – “Transforming” that persons current “reality… of things”. This transmutation of intense energy is only possible if the awakened one is in full tilt, if he/she is in full range of ones inner-life, is in full CONSCIOUSNESS of ones Lower-Shadow-Self and one who’s ego-motivations are for the greater good. Always. The man or woman who has surrendered to the Maker never injects the intensity of his or her self-power into another, unless he/she has PURE intentions for ALL involved. To raise them up.
In effect, the highly disciplined one LIFTS OTHERS to their state of consciousness. He or she never falls to the lowest common denominator of another, which requires immense self-mastery in itself… as the blind will always, yes always DO. That pulling down energy is perceived as “normalcy” in our societies. It is to be expected, sadly.
Hi P.Puppy,
I really am a Bunny (just not a wabbit). I humbly understand that I am “nothing”. The something´s that I am living, are actually ways of survival and I am aware of it. If depended on, they take me away from my connection to the Source. Therefore, I put a bit of my cosmic “nothing” into it. The nothingness is the result of the fact that I am not attached to the result, but to the harmony that I feel with the Source. It acts through through my will to surrender.
So, the stove is not a stove…it is my soulful desire to cook. And having a business is not earning a quick buck and abusing workers…it is my soulful desire to share my knowledge and raise the energy of the people around me.
This forum is not a forum…
Gatubela, Astrology is an ancient language of Symbols… it is not the glamour and pomp of Liz Green and her ‘money motivated’ spinning to sell a ton of books. Huge distinction.
The ancients, their occult knowledge inspired Liz Green, ‘they’ gave her the inspiration to make millions of dollars selling her take on a very precious, meta-physical occult knowledge… which is still hardly understood by the masses today. The masses perceive the superficial literature shoved in their faces by writers and publishers who make money from that public perception.
Yes, the planets do have profound meanings in our ‘Nature’. Nature means our time, day, year and place of birth, into this current life. Still… that’s just 1%, maybe less, of understanding astrology as a whole. People are oblivious to the existence of anything beyond their stagnant survival existence and the tiny realm of what their 5 senses tell them each day. = The ground – The known – Fear.
Hi P.Puppy, Yes, I feel the same. I have always felt that one has to LIVE astrology. Reading it subjectively can lead to fooling oneself and objectivefying a person. Just like Scorpio, one must look directly in the eyes of a person and feel their soul. Even if the birthdate is extremely relavant, humans are not capable of feeling birthdays as most are barely able to FEEL themselves. Reading those books – and stopping there, is opting to not do the soulwork yourself. Once we do the soulwork, we can feel the planets and the message / energy that they have for us. The answer is out there …not here. I have tried to tune in to them and to tell you the truth, I have actually trusted my life with what they tell me and WHEN they tell me. They are rather comforting. Even Saturn, which is very cruel and sarcastic, has important lessons.
Understanding this energy is to “cut out” all that is currently “real” in our mental world, and feel the universe within ourselves. I struggle to do this and am trying everyday, to be a better person.
Synastry: Venus-Pluto Aspects Between Two Charts
When Venus in one chart forms an aspect to another person’s Pluto
Venus conjunct other person’s Pluto
There is a strong pull between these two that can be fascinating, intensely attractive, and yet also disturbing at times. These two share a deep emotional tie. The Pluto person seems to have a window into the Venus person’s soul at times, and can use this special connection for better or for worse. As the relationship progresses, the Pluto person may behave in a possessive manner towards the Venus person. This is one indication of a karmic tie. This pairing of planets is one of the stronger indications of intense sexual attraction. This is a passionate connection, but should be managed so that it doesn’t turn into a love-hate union. Obsessive behavior is also a possibility. The Pluto person may demand more intimacy than the Venus person is willing or capable of giving. This relationship seems to change and evolve, and can be characterized by many dramas and emotional ups and downs. Times of frustration are followed by enlightenment and release, as the bond these two share is not a light or superficial one whatsoever.
Pluto conjunction Venus:
What does it mean to your relationship when your natal Pluto is in conjunction with your partner’s Venus? You are drawn by a passionate sexual attraction and re-attraction. Your intensity deepens over time rather than lessening. A desire to control, manipulate or sexually dominate your partner may well be a part of this mystical binding that begins with physical passion and through spiritual struggle and transformation seems to go to the core of unconditional love. If your partner’s Pluto is conjunct your Venus, a complete transformation of your attitudes about love and relationship will occur as you and your partner work through an intensely passionate physical and spiritual love, where your partner’s fascination with you can become an obsession, and issues of trust and acceptance are aroused and resolved between the two of you.
Good thing you are over there.
I wish white bunny tails did not look like moving targets.
lol! looks like it is always a moving target!
We will see what moves and what does not. I would not be a good bunny if I kept still.
Those eagle feathers are rather soft.
I feel weird today… I feel like cutting some people out in my life… people who have been giving me hard time. Including Mr S (though we still talk like normal friends, he updates me of what is happening in his life and civil to each other). This never happen to me before, I always stay put and hold on patiently, no matter how impossible it is. That is how I get whatever I want (Maybe my Taurus sun). Now, even my pisces moon do not want to escape and dream no more. I’m Virgo rising btw..
I also feel like talking to someone whom I’ve hurt and swear not to forgive for the rest of my life. I want to let him know that I forgave him and myself. My ex boyfriend~ he tried to contact me 2 yrs ago to share his joy when his baby boy was born but I ignored him. I was bitter and angry.
I guess I want to let go………. this is weird…….. I don’t want to feel anything now……
What is happening to me??
Guys if you don’t mind to communicate privately here is my email address lovemarrie573@gmail.com
Hi Lovemari,
I had been going through a bit of an emotionally hard time, and did not answer your post. Please tell me how you are.?
Were you able to let go and find peace within yourself?
hey gatubela.. i havent heard from her either. hope she is ok. what is happening for you? you did upset me along time ago but i am willing to forgive. you are a generous and kind hearted person, i know that.
i havent been in the best place either.. x
Hi Umm,
Thank you for forgiving.
My wishes for you are in my heart. I have been feeling more about virgos because my daughter is a virgo rising.
Strong and beautiful people!
yes strong…sometimes. thanks for saying that. good for me to hear right now. so you have a virgo rising daughter.im virgo rising too. does my own head in sometimes. bet she’s glad to have a mum like you.
sending you good wishes back..
Pluto has a dangerous reputation in synastry. He’s the guy in the room who causes everyone to back away a little. It’s well-deserved. With Pluto comes jealousy, obsession, compulsion, fearsome desire, terror, rage–a fight to the death, to the last gasp. In its more self-destructive phase, it can be a wish for death. With Pluto can come the experience, and hopefully an understanding, of the deepest, darkest desires of human nature: the impulse to destroy, to break taboos, to experience the forbidden. But Pluto is also about the impulse to cleanse, the impulse to heal. Pluto strips away the crust, the rot, the poison that is preventing us from experiencing our own spiritual wholeness. He doesn’t ask our permission or compliance. Pluto will get what it wants, by any means necessary–we only go along for the ride. When Pluto contacts another’s planet, it is to discover these dynamics within itself.
The Martian side of Pluto, in his role as the higher octave of Mars, is the one most visible in synastry. Pluto, in relationship mode, sets out to satisfy desire. No matter the planet it contacts, Pluto desires to be reborn through a deep psycho-sexual exchange with another human being. Pluto can go after whatever it needs to this end with a frightening intensity. There is a vast difference, though, between the way Mars and Pluto operate. Mars simply satisfies desire. In comparison to Pluto, Mars is rather mindless–it sees something it wants and it goes for it. On the other hand, Pluto has an agenda, a purpose, which is ultimately soul-oriented. Pluto wants to test our limits, to strip us down to the essence. Mars is direct. Pluto is not. There is an attraction/repulsion dynamic to Pluto that is interesting to observe, particularly in synastry. Pluto is torn between the known and the unknown; it senses that the unknown offers a kind of death, and is not fool enough to embrace it wholeheartedly, even though it knows that particular death is necessary. Pluto will do this ‘dance of death’ until desire inevitably wins out (it is Martian, after all). Then Pluto will hang on until its mission is accomplished, no matter the suffering. Life may be divided into ‘before’ and ‘after’ this Pluto contact. We are still ourselves, but we are not the same.
Transformation is Pluto’s ultimate goal. Whatever the aspects, Pluto strips away the ineffective coping mechanisms and false confidences of any planet it touches. Pluto will explore that planet’s depths and seek out what isn’t working. Pluto doesn’t involve the willing seduction and surrender that Neptune implies. With Pluto, the attraction is hypnotic, and very often feels unavoidable. The old Self, with all of its imperfect coping mechanisms, struggles to stay alive. Usually, the old Self loses. (Or it runs away, living to fight Pluto another day.) Relationships with heavy Pluto contacts have a Nietzschean tinge: that which does not kill me makes me stronger.
It would be nice if we could say that all these Pluto contacts were for the best, but that would be like putting a Good Housekeeping seal of approval on an earthquake. It’s good to rebuild, but the method or means or timing can be in question, and it doesn’t always have to be from the ground up. Pluto has the task of stripping away any psychological dross that no longer works for us, or affirms what has been shakily established. But Pluto, too, has to learn its limits. The best of Pluto goes forward with awareness. The worst of Pluto doesn’t know the difference between pruning dead branches and uprooting the entire tree. He can be a healer, allowing new growth, or he can be a thug, leaving us lying battered in the street.
Pluto challenges a planet’s strength and integrity. When Pluto touches something in a chart, there is nowhere to hide. Whatever secrets I may have, Pluto will seek them out. Whatever flaws, he will find. If Pluto touches Venus, my values and my self-esteem, and the very way I express my love, will be in question. If Pluto touches Mars, there will be a cutting or burning away to the very essence of desire. Pluto touching Saturn will act like the aforementioned earthquake, tearing down whatever I have built in the house Saturn occupies. With Pluto/Moon contacts, I may well feel that I’m in a struggle for my soul. At the very least, all my previous reference points and security patterns will be threatened. The person with the heavier Pluto influence tends to have the upper hand in relationships, which is why, when I see strong Pluto between charts, I always hope that I see it going both ways. This does, in fact, tend to happen with Pluto, which I find a bit mysterious. It’s as if people who enter into Pluto wrangles have a mutual desire for this kind of intense transformation, and Pluto is their weapon of choice.Pluto has the tendency to use its penetrating insight as a weapon. Ask anyone who knows someone with Pluto square Mercury. If they’re unhappy with you, they may not say anything for months, and then suddenly unleash a tirade of painful truths that your ten years of analysis wasn’t able to reveal. Pluto to any planet, either natally or between charts, brings this same pattern of silence, observation, analysis, and explosion. They will erupt on you just when you think you’re safe, when you are least able to defend yourself, and often walk away not realizing what they’ve done. Pluto’s powers of observation may be acute, but it’s not the most sensitive or empathetic of energies. Ruthless is the word that comes to mind again.
An unaware Pluto has a number of flaws, chief amongst them the desire and ability to control and manipulate. Pluto often isn’t aware of its power, and will not realize that, from your point of view, your association feels as if you’ve been dropped into the middle of a guerrilla war. Sometimes, they are outright manipulative, and will push your buttons just to see what they can get you to do. Even within a minor aspect between charts, Pluto may try to manipulate the partner’s planet to its own ends. Pluto is always about power, and the undeveloped Plutonian types were often bruised children who have been made deeply insecure. We misuse power when we are trying to redress feelings of powerlessness. Plutonian types have a great deal of charisma, and need to be persuaded to give up these mindless manipulations and focus their power for the good.
When Pluto is involved in a synastry, power is always an issue. Who has it, who uses it, who controls it within the relationship. As we’ve previously discussed, outer planets influence inner (see Synastry Q & A: Gods of Evolution), but those with the inner planet have the ability to make Pluto sharpen its awareness of the way it operates. The inner planets are not helpless against Pluto’s assault. Because the inner planets are so immediate and conscious, they will have a greater understanding of the way Pluto must transform, and inner transformation is ultimately what Pluto is after (after the death and rebirth, that is). No accident that Pluto is the planet that rules analysis and any other means of self-exploration. Pluto’s attempts to plumb your depths are, in fact, motivated by an intense desire to understand itself. In positive mode, Pluto will take the inner planet by the hand and embark on a mysterious, challenging, sometimes frightening journey towards a greater purity of interaction and intention. The inner planet will provide Pluto with a means and a perspective; Pluto will provide the desire, the drive and the will.
Plutonian relationships aren’t for everyone. If you have a lot of air, or prefer peaceful companionship to having your psyche pulled out and splayed all over the place, I wouldn’t recommend them. If you want passion, if you want intimacy, there are other ways. But Pluto associations are unique in their ability to help us get beyond the surface of the mundane world. Not in a dissolving, Neptunian way, but by means of the deep, chthonian mysteries of the realm of matter itself. If you want company on your journey through your own psychological underworld, Pluto is your man.
Hi Umm,
I read it over and over again, and I am still not done.
Beautiful!!!
yeah . well i could relate i guess.
“chthonian” learnt a new word.i like this- “…the realm of matter itself” .hmm.
physical beyond physical. i will try sometime to write what i feel and understand..maybe. perhaps im lazy. perhaps its beyond words. well it is , in essence. its beyond mind and logical understanding. hmm.still i can relate to the words. gonna work on this…. maybe ..hehe.
….”Pluto challenges a planet’s strength and integrity”…”
Yep. Without intense challenge. Without struggle…What are we??… What are we not??
Yes. Strength and integrity. Always. Life’s challenges are not won in battle through the unawares of apathy, chronic attachment to form, daftness or indifference. Being pleasant and chummy does not mean being honest with others and especially ones core inner experience of truth, unconscious of ones true… unknown… desires. Sure, pleasantries have their function… but not relative to the power managed and exumed of the Underworld.
Hey nice find Umm. The writer has described in splendid thought and understanding of what the Underworld is really all about. Those extremely brave, vigilant, vivified life challenges (forces), created IN us, manifest a higher (soul-felt) evolution… renewing our psyches and hearts by virtue of willingly seeking greater personal meaning through our spiritually interactive lives.
I watched the movie V for Vendetta secretly, the truth is I do not wish to evoke wars at home with no solution in sight because we want to live life we each are entitled to, for now I’m seeking peace and understanding at home becasue solutions do not lay within wars… it never has, it never will, solution lays within each and everyone of us, a change come from within… yes, I say this to you Apollo…it’s hard to say it face to face, becasue communication always seem to get interrupted with turbulent emotions…you ask me where is my twisted idea of “living like clear water” leading, and where does it end… I don’t know… I’m learning not to force my will on you as I have done so for the past seven month, and I’m keeping my own freedom-of-self intact… this is the balance point I found, at this point I found I can function, I can take back the responsibilities that I have neglected, be a loving and responsible mother, start to face my own dysfunction in life for so long, start to let the truth I found within myself line up with life’s acts… all these take time, and the solution of anything do not lay within wars with each other.
The movie V for Vendetta … I found I do not want to say what’s been said with the movie itself, I cannot do a better job than the story to tell the story… and I believe the inner wisdom of each person who watched the movie will get from the story what they “saw”… I’ve found… we “see” what we look for, in a movie, in a person, in life…so I tend to ask the question that’s not presented. I want to ask the what ifs. the words left unsaid… will complete a picture of what’s been said.
I ask what if Evy broke down and give in to her fear and sold him out? what would V have done… and yes, I know… by ask the question the answer is as clear as day light… he would have kept her in his castle for the duration of the year, for her protection and safety as he planned, and she would have faced the truth in herself and find peace in that “imprisonment”. He would have went ahead with his plan and took the responsibility of be the consciousness and acts of the people when the people are blind and asleep. Evy’s bravery and strength changed all this, it changed the fact V’s believe he’s needed in the way he is needed, it give him pause in deciding people’s fate when he is faced with the truth the people is fully capable of deciding their own fate… he let go. The idea of letting go is to know whatever he seek for others out of the purest intentions, when it could happen, he will let happen, even if it means he will not be part of it. and this realization brought upon his own death wish. He is no longer needed…. he hated monsters, that’s why he seeks to destroy them, by becoming them he found the means, becasue only evil can fight evil at a level field, that is why the butcher has used the means he used to combat the mob, but he hated it, he is constantly in pain trying to find the reason he is different, and in that pain a death wish is warm. V has destroyed the last monster standing… himself, the last domino card.
It has to be done, becasue it’s a cause. and behind this cause… what is the motivation? what is never said in the movie but is the one thing that is never far from everything… it is love. without love, none of what is ever done will ever be right again… without love from a woman to her fellow cellmates, V would never become who he seek out to become, to create a world where that woman can live freely, Evy would never become who she is today… without love, all means are meaningless… that is the one thing make everything happen in the movie right… make a monster a hero, an act of cruelty just. Love, is the only thing that separate the monster lives within us from us. Without it, we would so easily become another crusader with a different cause to concur another human being.
It is very easy to spot a ink spill on a white wall, there is nothing wrong and never less the truth to say it for what it is…an ink spill on the wall, a black spot…but it takes a loving heart, will, depth and creativity, to pain a picture, wanting to do so, to make it into a wall painting…it’s the heart that makes the difference, never an act, or a cause.
Do not seek to destroy love… love, and wish for it in others, even if it means we can’t be part of it… only then… we can see… the idea of a home.
Love does solve many problems, yet… does loving disturbed, tyrannical, hedonistic megalomaniac people, recklessly invading the sanctity of innocence and dignity among others, solve the incessant corruption and self-denial in our world??
Love cannot solve the demons eating away the goodness nurtured in the purity of another. Only a response can change those demonic delusions. A powerful response, in which the cowardly fears projected by the parasite are met by an individual who has faced his death, many times over. Does the parasite know love? Does it welcome death with conviction? Are such people only interested in what feeds their tiny self-interest and narcissism? That is their only true motivation. Your needs, your principles and values are not important to the indifferent, ego-consumed crowd. The indifferent, disturbed crowd shares their lies among each other, and believes in the results of those ideas, at any cost over others with those lies and deeds.
You wonder why Hades (V) would start boiling within over that reality. You wonder why he feels the reality of cruel injustice (in it’s many masks). He seethes. But we need him.
Idealizing love is not being in touch with the real world at our feet. There is segregation among people, blatant divide. That divide is fear laced. Fear cannot change, if it lacks the will and bravery. Fear can only attempt to control and manipulate what enters into it’s radius. Fear “uses” the energy of others to feed. That feeding, is among masses of people, institutions, social clicks, groups and families. Fear is not breaking free from the comfort of our known. So love… knowing that fear subconsciously controls the directions of billions of lives… is not the only answer. If it were the ultimate answer, human beings would not need to struggle, fight, and lose sight of their pain, which are as natural for us, as the laughter, the joy and affection felt between us.
Apollo is our inner-Sun. He alone, does not reveal the answers to life. Far from it actually. While Apollo is in unison with Hades and the universal kaleidoscope of energy, so life via the will to death becomes meaningful. This planet would be a pink unicorn utopia if every person genuinely loved every breathe. As mentioned before, that idea is not grounded in reality. Open those bunny eyes.
…”This planet would be a pink unicorn utopia if every person genuinely loved every breath…”
JoJo, I wish we were that advanced as a people. Knowing that love-life would be like spiritually soaring with the ancient souls in the movie Avatar. The symbols of man and his spiritual ignorance are exhibited in that movie “opposing” to what the evolved people have “known”. The message of senseless killing and power-trips to feed the fear of what one does not understand, was spoken clearly and deliberately in that film. That film presented us more of man’s fearful myth, the incessant self-interest and the motivations to constantly lie for the development of that myth.
Love?
I wish it were that simple.
To me life is rather simple… not because I do not see the reality or complexity of reality, but rather I see the flow of Cosmic energy is simple and flawless… what we as human make life as life is to us has nothing to do with what’s being created by the force. Therefore, life as a series of choices has version we can chose from, we can chose a version of acts with love, and we can chose a version of acts without it. And that is what love is to me, it reflect who we are inside, and choices as a result of who we are inside, love is not the chaotic noises from the out side of our being… therefore, whether the object of love is worthy of our love is not the essence and energy of love itself. As I always wanted to say but chose not to… that what we see and say and act toward others reflect who we are, not who they are.
Each human is separated from the other, each choice is our own. and if I say my silence is born out of compassion and love…not the lack of it, will you understand? will you understand of the knowledge (power with love is knowledge) of the knowledge I feel is within my words to say it out loud, I made a choice not to, because I love, I do not want to voice it just because I can when no one is ready to hear these words…will you see the difference?
You see, to accept the simplicity and beauty of the energy of love, is to realize, the simplest things solves the most complicated of pain. it tell us there is no need to worry about whether we are needed or not needed… the question that is in V’s deep psyche of his own worth, it was never in Evy’s or Valarie’s psyche… to those who love, “need” is not an consideration of love, love simply is, it’s radiated from within. The deep and raw questions and explorations of one’s deep self… it should happen in one’s own dignified silence and with the will of one’s own choice. I will never voice it or ask the whys… because it is not within the choice of love when the words reach my lips, as of now.
So many things I chose not to say, simply because the things I can say can’t be said with love… not at this moment, one day it will be said when the time is right and when you are ready to hear them, with whom it will be said to you it doesn’t matter, I wish you love, and that does not have to be me as part of it.
may be the motivation of breaking the silence now, is to share what I understand what love is… for that sharing, may be time is ready.
Hi JoJo and P.Puppy,
Ooofff…this is hard for me to write, because it deals so deeply with what I have gone through. One must have knowledge of both light and dark, in order to battle correctly…
It is the “dark” that actually “saves” your life. But you need “love” in order to understand this. Both of these energies residing in the heart…makes those battles with Pluto take on a rather cosmic meaning.
Love, it’s a magical word, yet it’s not magic, the idea of magic is that it happens on occasions, love is like wealth, it’s accumulated, it’s a chore, it’s a boring process to become a loving person, because it requires a life time of facing every decision with a choice to love, not the Kodak moments we freeze in time. it never ends… there is never a point to say I’m loving now, I can take a break from loving others since I’m already a loving person.
I don’t mean to say love is everything, not a pink unicorn utopia, just like I don’t assume the “rebirth and death” is talking about an earth full of Hades walking in life. Life is always the life as we know it, with a mixture of everything we like and everything we don’t like. Love is the one gift the creator created in us that actually gives us the means to face the pains and struggle and hardship of life with a feeling of warmth and strength, and it’s completely free, accessible to everyone on this face of earth, anyone one can obtain it with a simple act of choice, at any given time of their choosing. No matter who you are, no matter when, we can always love, and we never lose the ability to love.
You will notice I talk about the act of love, the feeling of loving others, not been loved, the feeling of loved by someone. The second is beautiful, precious thing in life, always should be treasured, but it’s something outside of our being, it’s not the energy and power the creator given us to face life’s hardships. To ask a questions of clarity whether people love us, what do we expect the answer in return? …do we want to know how they feel about us? do we want to know what will they do about their feelings? which answer will it be? There is already a “right” answer in most people’s mind, anything different from the “right”, is “wrong”, what do we see in people, is usually what we are looking for, confirmation of what we already believe. Because the dynamic of a situation is, what people feel and what people will do are two different things, look at the feelings of love inside of our own past, in most cases, what we feel, and what we end up doing are often times separate things. But which answer would be good enough? which answer is good enough how we end up facing our own feelings? you then know to look at the outside for answer is meaningless… the answer, always lay within.
No matter what, the most powerful truth is the simplest truth, some call it common sense. ask ourselves this question, is a life without fear sounds real? remember whatever happens to humans, happens to all of us, regardless, always… to think anything would out rule the rules of Cosmo, it makes no sense, because a person can be exception at something, no one is an exception at everything, but everything, follows the laws of Cosmo, because there is a function and reason for every cosmic law, it’s there to teach us, it’s there to serve a purpose, in the case of fear, its primal function is self-protection, and protection of others. There is nothing wrong with protection…what clouds our vision, is there are so many kinds and degrees of fear, which rules our actions and consciousness? in the case of Evy, her fear of death, when eventually faced with the fear of the death of truth for mankind/fear of the death of love, the second fear is more real than the first. Yet there are people who will find out the fear of death is more real to them, they will eventually act accordingly… it’s the simple fact of life, do we accept it? what it means to accept this fact of life? does it mean we accept others changes who we are inside? no, since there is no world full of pink unicorn or full of Hades, the world is always dynamic, it always comes down to what do we do when faced with the choices life present to us. in each and single case, from each and single one of us, and this world of dynamics, is a world worth living for, worth dying for. And society as whole is undeniably moving forward, becasue we as human evolve on the higher planes. this world will never be as good as we hope, but also never be as bad as we believe.
Because from any single person, the things you find repulsive, there are also things that are undeniably beautiful. It’s just happens no one is looking at every moment of someone else’s life.
To understand the realness of being real, we will realize there is eventually no right of wrong answer, there is real or false answer…the commonsense calls it, truth.
The truth of emotions is this, without love, without care, no one will ever be able to reach us, reach our soft core, where every other emotions happen, joy, happiness, anger, jealousy, hatred, even desire, anything that is subjective… without love we will never feel those emotions towards others… If we keep our hearts open and eyes open, we will eventually discover, the emotions born out of love/care never outlast love/care itself, the moment we stop loving/caring, the moment all the other real emotion dies, we just simply no longer care.
The rock bottom of the river of emotions is love and care, we will be carried around by the current of other emotions, it’s real, it makes no sense to say or try to say nothing touches us, no pain, no jealousy, no anger, no joy, no happiness..everyone of us struggle ungracefully in it without exception. Most people is unaware of the rock bottom where if you find it in yourself, love would anchor you in this violent current of emotions. Some people do not look, some people don’t know how to swim…so the majority of us is simply swiped away. It’s a hell of ride, it leave us scarred and scared.
In the cases of traveling through the violence of emotions and eventually finding this rock of love that anchors us, we will learn, love gives us the openness and ability to keep our eyes open, to find that kindhearted, strong person we were before we enter this river of emotions.
With your hearts eyes, you see your feelings clearly, you see the growth pattern of love, the seeding, the leafing, the growing, eventually blossoming into a tree of life…and the cosmic truth of this growth is the fact no one can escape a step and stay real, no one feels like a tree when the seed never had a chance to break ground, and no one can uprooting a tree without feeling excruciating pain. And with clarity of your hearts vision, you start to feel compassion for people taking baby steps to learn to love, and compassion for people who house a tree in their heart for those you love… you feel the anger of being mistreated and jealousy of possessiveness fade… you will find out to your own surprise, but not to the surprise of the Cosmo, that when you love people, they will love you back, in different forms, different degrees, to their ability, they will care… this is the law of Cosmo, we cannot help but feel kindness and care for those who truly love us, you will see the same Cosmo law apply to those you love/you care, you will understand them as you understand yourself, and feel as them as you feel as yourself…your heart will slowly line up with the love you feel inside, instead of the turbulent emotional currents that carries you away…so will your choices and acts…
This is the true power and energy of “to love”, it creates warmth, when the snow flakes fall.
I’m writing for too long, I need to go out and do the things I need to do, but what I wrote is so little of what I want to say, not even all of what I can say…may be I will finish what I want to share next week.
“…the knowledge I feel is within my words to say it out loud, I made a choice not to, because I love, I do not want to voice it just because I can when no one is ready to hear these words…”
Yes darling. The above… in my world… is called intuitive discernment. Being discerning among every person we meet. The act of choosing ‘who’ we want to love openly, to me, through my discriminative screen, is a necessary process for the maintenance of soulful, mindful individuality. To not care who we love, to not discriminate the intent and character (or lack thereof) of who we love in another… is to subconsciously fall victim in the throws of unconscious, distorted energy. To not discern the people who we let in close, who we cherish and trust, is the genesis for a tormented co-dependency, stripping away self-control, losing core independence, convoluting personality dis-functions of jealousy, doubt, obsession, mistrust, emotional dependency and a litany of other relationship vices which harbor no meaning, no purpose and no potential growth from that diluted co-personality.
I dislike argument with women. I really do. My nature, is optimistic while it is stubborn. It just depends on what we want in an exchange and who we are loving… or what is not noticed in the real social world… is “the pretension” of love. In a Scorpio’s world… one asks the question to themselves if the people you really love, will honor you, be there for you FOREVER?? There is no flaky way out once you are let in, deeply in. So ‘the cost’ for establishing such a deep heart-soul consuming love-devotion is not taken lightly. Couples everywhere eventually burn out and die. They move on to new life experiences. Call me old fashioned… but I believe that Scorpio souls want the passion and intensity with one partner to be forever.
When Scorpio souls learn from their past experience that people “are not” this loyal, devoted and committed to grow with their partner in their primary relationship, our suspicion then owns the best of us from that time forth.
Trusting is healthy. It opens up vistas in the heart. But I must say… the incredible energy of Pluto/Mars in my heart, warrants a high level of caution to who I allow in.
The interesting thing here is, I have been more open, more communicative and free with the public here on the forum. But I find it very difficult to share this realism of me with people out in the real social world, face to face. They see glimpses of my difference, but I never fully explode into what I feel about everything. I conceal my inner-self mostly. Even a tinge of of personality has blasted people out of the ground. The extremes of Pluto/Mars energy are not compliant to a Venusian tenderness, although I am that too. The real social world does not want to relate with much outside of their own image and survival needs. Getting to know me, fully, out in public, is like extracting blood from a stone.
That’s why the energy of God, transposed through all living creatures, is all I really know. I wish women had their connection to forces which moved them deeply, and if so, I wish they would explore and investigate those changes they feel. But they don’t. They want to play and have fun… just like her Persephone image. I just seem to be a daddy holding her pacifier.
some women do explore. and investigate. and may also have fun.
you know what you have to do pluto… remember that stuff about about penetrating soul..mans job etc.to penetrate her.
feel like giving you a hug. cos you’re beautiful. and i love how open you were then.
you are so much more than the “daddy holding her pacifier”.but it shows how caring you are.
can you play and have fun with her? i know you can. ive seen it. it is so in you.maybe its just a matter of finding the kind of play that you want, that suits you, that makes you happy, that feels genuine and true to how you resonate with whats around you.no matter what you are still you and you’re gorgeous did you know that? your searing honesty, your wit, your insight. and your sensitivity.
we are all surviving here on earth. i understand fully the fear of not forever,i really do. small steps … its so easy to sabotage now through fear of forever.but you know that. be gentle and kind to you, cos your lovely. something is changing… far out maybe its all happening beyond our little galaxy and we are feeling it. even beyond earth.. we have just had three lunar eclipses in the last month, its been an intense time for alot of people.
why dont you go somewhere new for a little bit..have a change of scenery.. go up to the mountains with a backpack and sleep by a fire that you built under the stars.i probably sound corny and whatever but i know that sag side of you needs some nature/adventure time. do you get that much?beyond all the glitz and glam of city stuff.. which sounds to me like you’re a bit fed up with.
things can get so incredibly stagnant when we are just doing the same thing over and over and deep inside we know that it is not true to who we really are.
A Hindu poem
Love says I am everything
Wisdom says I am nothing
Between the two
my life flows
In my heart I know I can let go.
In the end I will find some peace inside.
New wings are growing tonight.
It’s a weighted choice for me on what to say… the consequences of words weights heavily on me. In silence…I’ve taken on every little thing about everything with an intensity went unnoticed. It’s part of the story of my life, no one understands me… I accepted this fact long ago… When people see things, or feel things about me that’s not who I really am… most times I chose silence… because words do not really have the power to tell people things they are not looking for, when people in their core are not ready yet to want to discover, rather than to seek confirmation on what they already believe, I found warmth and integrity in silence. Because what I respond would just end up been an act of prove people wrong, rather than to share myself….where is the love and meaning of doing that? This is a question I face daily in my silence.
I’m sorry for ever hurting people in ways I do not wish to hurt them… but to become things don’t line up with my inner truth…it won’t happen even if I will it to happen…. it’s who I am, I can no more be someone else than anyone who feels the same way about themselves… the realism of what’s exchanged here drains me on some deep level is so real, I’m sorry to have to say these things…but I cannot pretend otherwise. What I say here, is not accusation, I understand deeply the path each person has to walk is vastly different, but I must share my realism, as truth is the least costly thing of every option there is…
… The responsibility of forever weights on me words are pale to describe, it’s part of who I am…if the motivation of my inner search and sharing I’ve done here is not apparent of this fact, nothing I ever say or ever do will be recognized for what motivates me..is it love? or is it fear? “So much is at stake”, well said. My real fear, is harming the souls of those I love, this fear will never leave me, in its subdivision, is the fear of if I can be what I want to be in something that will cost people I love so much if I fail. I don’t know the answer, I feel everyone I met so far, no one knows the answer, it’s uncertainty we all live with, a fear is so real in everyone, but rarely accept by ourselves, especially on the quest of fearlessness, it’s basically ignored.
If I may be blunt and raw, the complete blockage of acknowledgement of these real fears, lead us to roads not discovering what will truly lead anyone to forever, in realism and truth, rather than ideals of our completion, therefore expectation of other’s complementarities. We are incomplete; we will never be complete on the road of growth until the day we die. The functional acceptance of this fact is our own humbleness of not knowing; therefore we intensely keep our eyes open, to each and every one of our own inner feelings, our own exchange, and input. Looking at the outside does not reveal the truth of “us”. Only with uncertainties we can be ready when the stretching of the self happens, as these uncomfortable moments are the only indication of we are stepping out of our comfort zone, we are venturing into the unknown. The surrender to truth is an intimate moment happens between us and our maker, not between a man and a woman. not a demonstration of the virtue of what we can do, it’s a private moment of awe. If surrender happens in the energies of Cosmo, there is no disappointment follows these stretches, as disappointment is rooted in expectation; expectation is the language of seeking for compensation for truth. There is no outside compensation exist in these moments of awe striking surrenders. If we truly submit to these surrenders, we will recognize and feel incredible compassion for those who is experiencing this same awkwardness, we will feel incredible humbleness for those brave souls who not only are open to pain, to awkwardness, but voice it, ask it, express it.
We give so much glory to “integrity” of choosing what will protect us, yes, seeking those who will hurt us the least or complement our completion is an act of self protection, is the blocked language of fear. The integrity of these acts is to seek insurance against our inner demon, as we instinctively avoid facing it, elements of the self and other’s protection. I do not ask nor expect people to invite inner demons, these protection magnetism are so natural and normal. But I ask and expect on the road of seeking truth, to voice the integrity to openly “feel”, coming from anyone who does not “chose” on grounds of intellect and sophistication. They may lack the discipline to manage those pain… remember, the great and understanding person who we think we are always challenged when emotions enter our reality. These souls most times will not be the chosen on the quest by those who “chose” based on what their bravery of open to feelings made them seems, their stumbling steps and their inner most darkness. They act on incredible bravery and primal intuition that “there is more to life, more to love”. They use their raw feelings to experience each pain to find the right answer. I do not accuse whatever learned and shared here intends to cause harm to anyone in anyway, rather, what transpired here is the pure will to heal. But the worst enemy is the enemy we don’t see, sometimes it means ourselves.
I do not over compensate what I praise because I have an agenda, I pronounce it in a loud voice becasue it’s NEVER been said and acknowledged. The injustice of it all.
I’ve beginning to see those who learn from here, start to be shaped by what is becoming increasingly clear to me, partial and easy truth. We are creating a “religion” of integrity that is lacking integrity in its intolerance of the realism of human existences, in its taking on the shape of using integrity as a form of rewards instead of guarding its nature of impartiality. And it’s very easy to be captured in these partial and easy truths, because it confirms what we already believe, similar in echoing the pain we feel when we see someone losing a limb physically, but it takes deeper compassion to feel the pain of someone who lost a limb psychologically.
There is a question of what do I see in people when it’s apparent the lack of integrity is in plain sight. I see in them, “myself”. I see the deep rooted motivation in my own lies and know what motivated their lies… I see the human condition of lying in everyone at some point of their lives. It’s well said that we lie only when we need to, others lie when they don’t need to… it’s so very natural to assume we are the only one to have a cause to be human, and universe are built around our understanding… this assumption, is only human. Once the emotions of been lied to dies down, the love in us would give us the means to really look at others, the choice is do we chose to look or turn away? The essence of individualism shows us everyone’s needs are different, therefore we act inevitably different from another person’s idea of need and integrity.
… why do people need to lie? and I find most times is because truth is punished… truth bring about pain, and pain is not rewarded by norm, therefore to avoid pain, we lie. So in essence, a healthy relationship that has the potential to lead to forever, reward truth, even though these truth gave us pain, if the dynamic can survive these pain. This is different from asking people to become doormats, it’s to say, do we have in ourselves to accept other people’s truth and still love them? it is to say, to decide if someone is incapable of telling the truth, we have to first try our best to offer “you don’t ever need to lie to me” and follow up our words with real action… the real uplifting of any dynamic. And of those who in their past had so much pain and punishment for being truthful, do we see the punishment they gave themselves of deciding their own fate of being unforgivable? Therefore is sure to lose what they don’t want to lose if truth is known for the “wrong” they did? Do we see the worst critic is themselves and see the deep wound of not believing anyone could forgave them? Act out in lies? If we allow ourselves to love, it’s not very hard to see ourselves in others.
manipulation is real, but even manipulation has a root that is very human, we spend our energy and intellect to detect and avoid been manipulated, but do we also have a responsibility to seek out the roots and allow ourselves to love? yes, things never voiced.
I ask myself if the blunt and raw words I share here today, is a punishment for truth from others? There is always a part of me feels uncertain, but a bigger part of me knows, my motivation of sharing my truth and realism, is loving others, and my acts are chosen from opening my eyes to them. This is the realism of examine our acts, because when we don’t love and keep our eyes open, we create situation to trigger lies in others, because we see what will cause other’s to lie, and we instinctively are drawn to acts that will confirm the wrongness in others to confirm the righteousness in ourselves, our insecurities…it’s very human and normal acts of control people excises in others…it’s unconscious in most cases… There is nothing wrong in making a choice not to be in a situation where we can’t trust… but these acts bring out the worst in each other…if we want forever, it’s critical to see our acts with eyes wide open, and ask ourselves what are we doing to others and if others are doing the same thing back to us, why and why not?… truth can be revealed on levels we don’t know exists… and love and forever cannot be found in any other ways but truth.
The essences of individualism, do we see in others the things that are most important to them as we know in our heart, there are things that are most important to us? Do we see someone who never had a home in the real sense, a home is something they value above all else? can we love and respect this fact with love? as I never had much freedom in my own dysfunction and powerlessness, freedom of being me is above all else. and when something we dream we cannot have we yearn for it in its extreme, if we cannot have the extreme, do we then give up our dreams? no, we still dream of a home, with someone we can love, we still dream of freedom, in anyway we can have it. We can love, we can be free in what life is giving us… if we allow ourselves to love.
It’s not hard to see the vulnerability of our own need, when we are at the weakest while we can’t have what we want the most, love is given to us from those who love us, freely… and these selfless acts, what it made us feel? what it brought out in us?… we are all humans, the way to create love, is to allow us to love others, as we are loved.
We worry so much of loving the wrong person, yet, if we somehow find our inner most acceptance to our soul, our heart, our realism, our feelings, we trust ourselves… the primal selection of whom to love is build in us, a gift given from our creator in the form of our feelings and intuition, that are far advanced and flawless than our logic and judgment. Those who ever had a connection with us, and found their way into our lives, is inevitably toned in with the wavelength of who we are in some degree. We trust the potential of seeds, but also trust the system the creator given us will only function the way of the Cosmo. Meaning, the primal connection and fusing of souls between a man and a women, will only happen on the level of input coming from both parties, bond to that degree without exception, as realism is only built with what’s real, real love, real openness, real connection…from everyone involved, it will not function on our wish of “be loving” “to love” “integrity”, it won’t happen with ohs and ahs, it only happens when we love, and loved in return, give and given in return…Ask our inner most feelings, it’s more honest than we are if we allow its voice to tell us the truth, anything short of real is build on crumbling house of cards.
The answer is within… and my answer is my silence, when nothing more can be said with the love in my heart. I wish you love when snow flake falls, because first and for most, my heart loves me, without loving me there is no loving others, when the heart tells me the answer is silence, I listen to it intensely.
Hi JoJo,
I also saw V this weekend…I had seen it before – badly translated in Spanish and very badly recorded. So, this time, I saw it in a very good image and audio.
Love (everything) makes you understand clearly and truly (wisdom of nothingness…which is obtaining flow through living in a state of constant death – very much akin to a wave that comes rolling into the shore…the ego is something dynamic and flexible, not rigid and fixed), that there is truly something to fight for.
When someone engages in a “simple” life, the world´s suffering is very clear and evident. It permeates into you and boy does it bring you to your knees. You begin to search for the REAL solution, and it eludes you. One does not have this extra sensitivity because one is “compassionate and loving – you have this extrasensitivity because you have “purified” your senses and expanded them to what you “do not see”.
What is sad to see, is V´s limitation to using weapons of dark instead of light. He does not manifest this type of cosmic “freedom”, but the truth is, if one is dealing with EGO…you are either a slave or a killer. (Love what he did with those knives!!!)
These relationships always open a cosmic window of KARMIC opportunity (an eye for an eye) for the “enslaved” to dominate the “enslaver” by the very process of enslavement…But past these energies, there lies a higher energy which “FREES” the karmic bonds.
Not all of us are here to die
Some of us are here to fly.
“… What is sad to see, is V´s limitation to using weapons of dark instead of light. He does not manifest this type of cosmic “freedom”, but the truth is, if one is dealing with EGO…you are either a slave or a killer…”
His message and action does free the enslaved from their illusion. Here’s why:
The knives used to kill, are the representation of Mars energy, which = “personal” action or agression in human nature. All humans are born with this energy, or one could not physically function. The explosives used with which to destroy a collective institutionalized cancer, are the representation of Pluto energy, which = “trans-personal” or “super-societal” affect, for death, destruction and ultimately… regeneration… for a cause, a Godly purpose (verb) amid us, that is much higher. The intent of Plutonic energy is never baseless or motivated for the applause of the audience. The intent of V… was indeed necessary relative to the world we live in today.
Philosophically speaking, code name V was ‘far from’ limited through his soul. Had V… for example, just simply shared his “light” to each and all of the loveless imposters in question… he would not, absolutely could not, in effect “transform” a damned thing in that existing life. He knew that pure kindness does not shape the human world for the better. Transcendence does. Death, and an emotional sophistication of the ego, our emotional psychology… have a divine purpose. A profound purpose. Had V seeked peace “by sharing only love and light”, he would not “be able” which means… “own the power” to re-shape the evolution of man (woman) and their mundane existence in this Godless world.
As I have attemped to share for a while now, the act of inner-death (not literal) is necessary for seeing and being the light. Destruction of the old must create way for the new, the better, the higher and ultimately a way to know real, purposeful love. Both deep personal love, and reforming universal detached love.
The reason darkness exists in the mundane mind of man, is because the very notion that “light itself” sans a lenghty, victorious journey through hell, “will heal” all of the worlds wounds, will heal the peoples chaos (maya) and that light alone sans any suffering or discomfort will prevail. That reality, I’m sorry but that idea, is precisely an act of thinking light in of itself, will or does transform our world. In my world… that idea of “light” it’s preaching… is WHY this human existence is really fucked-up in the first place.
As captured in the movie…
… The political agenda of man, his tremendous lust for greed, his insatiable need for egocentric approval reflecting back-in on his need ‘outside’ of his own “self-worth” is precisely the reason why the energy of love is in vain… IF it is lacking the Pluto/Mars/Venus “purpose of deed”. The vanity of man is NOT the self-mastery of man. The light alone blinds any disctinction between them. Those realities in ones-self are so far, far apart… meaning the divine (soul), and the separation from ego (mans’ myth)… has become quite amusing to me when I see and feel. To witness this existential gap in others, and to realize the existence of this enormous separation had existed IN me, for 32 blind years, makes me feel very grateful.
…Also, the energy of Plutonic transformation is much more elusive in the majority of each individual. Meaning, in order to find a relationship with Pluto’s power, which is used (manifested) for the betterment of everyone involved including one’s own private, intimate evolution. Pluto packs a powerful wallop in our psyche’s. The more a person was born with tidal ambivalent Scorpionic energies and influences, they are the people who could intimately relate to what I’m saying here.
I have come to appreciate that many people were not chosen by the Source to really experience Pluto/Scorpio or the Underworld in this lifetime. The social/relational reality is the majority of baby souls don’t have,or don’t know the existence of a relationship with this incredible unseen, power. When I say that someone is “innocent” what I have meant is… their souls are oblivious to any psychology of Pluto in their lives. Gotta love the babies. That’s why I’m here. To protect.
An important final point on this:
Each man in a position of authority and influence over others, in that particular movie, be it political, or religious status and labels… actually “believed” that they were incarnations of their own “Light” too, Gatubela. They actually “believed they were “loving” and being loved in return for their message and plight. Ya see?
But that message, their assertion for “good” in their respective plight, or life path… is not… what V had seen and felt within himself. Do you know what Pluto interanlizes when witnessing those men… their “love” their “truth” and their mission over the masses???
He feels the intense wrath of their on-going Hypocrisy.
Watch and hear the unseen Truth. It’s not what V does that is mindblowing. It is the what, the why and the how, man creates the justification of his own pathetic fears AND DOES NOTHING ABOUT THEM. Those men in authority, “of power”… to utilize and abuse over others are simple cowards. Nothing more. Observe the coward, his reality, when Death dawns upon him.
PPuppy / Bela,
Appreciate if I could get in touch with you offline.
Can’t talk on this forum anymore… ;-(
love,
marrie
lovemarrie573@gmail.com
Hi P.Puppy,
I saw all of those things P.Puppy…And you got me started!!!
Well, this is hard for bunny like me to “get rough and nasty and brutally and simmering honest ” with my true sentiments about my environment and what it has meant for me to be a V that hops. Darn fuzzy tail takes the seriousness away from the overall image.
In order to continue with what I had started…normally, it is not OUR suffering that motivates us to those Plutonian heights…(so it is not only plutonian energy being shown in the movie). It is STRENGTH. “I WILL NOT MOVE!!!”.
I have said before that one must master the concept of strength. One can start to see your prison when you start to say “no”. You can literally push against it. Say “no” to someone today…and see the lack of love and the REAL truth behind their actions and façade. Our LATENT dishonesty is the real reason why couples fight. This dishonesty is based on the LACK of LOVE as the main foundation of our motivation for “opening our mouthes” ( I will just get her to shut up and leave me alone)…”cooking a dinner” (I have other things I would rather be doing”), working (I would rather be at the beach)…taking the metro (I would rather drive a car)…etc.
Looking at the despondent faces of our colleagues actually light up when they “get what they want” (for now…desire is chaotic and can only be satisfied…not eradicated), IS what gets to me.
You will SEE Pluto slapping you in the face (the unknown) as he surely wants to be seen. He pulsates in all of us…remember?
We have a lot of “yes” energy in this earth and we maintain this “in the name of love” because we receive satisfaction of our most basic needs and we would be surprised with what we actually “sell” ourselves for, in comparison to what those “bad guys” are buying. Is it only fear? Or is it the fact that we do not have a correct definition of FREEDOM? You would be surprised how many people DO NOT WANT transformation. They want “ENSLAVEMENT” and minimal problems.
We are gliding upon the surface of “yes”.
OK – gotta get back to work…will write again.
Love Marie, I will try to get an email so that we can talk. (hang in there)
Yes, there are very powerful inner truth to be learned with the simple act of saying no, not only when we say no to things that do not line up with our truth, but more importantly, when no is said to us, what is our motivation of our every response. It will reveal inner truth and freedom on many unseen levels. Very well said Gatubela, thank you for sharing this insight. On top of the concept of saying no, try the practice of saying yes to things we normally say no to, and saying no to the things we normally say yes to. If, these intermediate “yes” and “no” are our first second response to that situation. The uncomfortable, and painful, but very meaningful road of self stretching begins… Love our shaky steps, love other’s shaky steps, give allowance on this journey, but find the strength not to deviate from it… over time, for those people the energy is not violent volcanic eruption, truth can be found this way too.
Hi JoJo,
Yes!!! Therefore being prejudiced to “bad” people or “good” people is “dissolved”. We all manifest our energetic signatures and not necessarily goodness or badness, but on higher levels of being, there is no such thing. There is only our reaction to “it”.
So, even if we feel wrath in the hypocrisy of others (which is equivalent to a huge, dark, plutonic slap on the cheeks. I am not joking – ), or if we are asleep on the “yes train”… I am often left with the sensation of an “unseen” cosmic law and our own energy signatures imprinted when we are not one with it (karma).
The reason that I feel V was limitted was because of what was NOT shown in the movie. These are the questions that I ask…why was he re-born in “fire” and Evy re-born in “water”? Are people able to perceive what it really takes to battle? Other than great fighting skill, flexibility, wonderful intelligence and poetic wit etc.? Were people able to see that what it took was for him to become “ONE” with the “darkness and very vibrant energy” flowing? It was not vengeance. He was not a man full of hate…Meaning you can have a certain effect if you limit yourself to earthly vengeance. But you have another effect, if you are able to perceive and flow with the darkness/light that is VERY tangently flowing through all of it ALL.
Scorpionic energy are all devils until we open our hearts…then they are angels. This is why, based on my experiences, people must open their hearts…the energy changes and permits the transformation – significant enough to have long term effects. Why? Because they did not give a damn before…when they were enslaved. Why should they give a damn if a symbolic building is destroyed? V´s vendetta against the bad guys who hurt him, was not the motive. So…what does it take to NOT WANT REVENGE after someone has done something bad to you, and why does this permit transformation?
What made the difference?
“…These are the questions that I ask…why was he re-born in “fire” and Evy re-born in “water”?…”
If you were to dig your bunny hole all the way to the center of the earth, what element would your bunny fluff feel? Boiling magma. Fire. Hot stuff baby.
Ya know… Under-the-World…. gets a little hot. That is V’s spiritual origin. Although… he fully knows the “cleansing” of Water and gifts for renewed life too.
Once Evey had suffered greatly and found love and meaning in that cell, she affirmed her Will-to-Be. Her psycho-emotional catharsis completely re-shaped her world. Something happens inside of us when we die. It is utterly divine and I find it difficult to put in words. All I know is, after battling through the passage of death… we see and feel life much differently. Hopefully… for the stronger purpose to not allow controlling deceptions and power plays by the mob… for the virtue of not being afraid and tentative as we once were. Transformation is real, in mind and heart. There becomes less fear to face realizing the unknown path and more challenges ahead.
That’s right, V was not full of hate. He knew how to love. He knew “the feeling” of real love. V (Pluto) is the reformer of our soul. We have killed the beast within. The battle with the next monster is just around the corner.
Such is life.
“…Once Evey had suffered greatly and found love and meaning in that cell, she affirmed her Will-to-Be. Her psycho-emotional catharsis completely re-shaped her world…”
Oh btw, it is important to realize that Pluto planted the seeds inside of Evey before her inner-transformations became real and happened.
Let us not forget… Evey *** did not voluntarily want *** the journey into suffering.
There you are ladies… Hades… and “the abduction” of Persephone.
It was ALL for love.
“…So…what does it take to NOT WANT REVENGE after someone has done something bad to you, and why does this permit transformation?
What made the difference?..”
His Vendetta was socially discerning. Not reckless or vain. That’s the message when fighting the system. The system handcuffs your soul. The idea of revenge is to SPEAK YOUR TRUTH, REGARDLESS IF YOU ARE AFRAID. You are enslaved if you cannot live your rights and be the honesty you behave in. The regime in the workplace, at school, at church, or with family and friends who don’t really care about you is an example of speaking up, clearly, so people won’t mess with your heart.
That act of social revenge is not violent. It never should be. The message of revenge is simply defining boundaries, sharing core-INDIVIDUALITY and soulful essence of ones True-self. If that outspoken intent hurts others, one should know exactly who they are hurting.
Discernment.
“Turning the other cheek” as the Christ consciousness implies does not heal a damed person or thing. Our human world cannot evolve if we permit the power starved authority to bash our brains-in with their self-interest doctrines.
What happend to Christ when he turned the other cheek?
They strung his gentle ass up on a cross, humiliated him for all to see. His dignity devoured.
Now:
The God of death-sex and transformation doesn’t allow that POLITICAL narcissism. He destroys the doctrines of man, their HYPOCRITICAL nouns. He (his nature) ‘fights’ the demons they have become.
Man, I can’t shut up today.
“…You would be surprised how many people DO NOT WANT transformation. They want “ENSLAVEMENT” and minimal problems.
We are gliding upon the surface of “yes”..”
Yes. Almost all people on earth, perceive the verb of “Freedom” in their imaginations and life goals, known in the — material world. The ‘yes’ world. Their life-long quest for material comfort, ease and security signifies a happy, pain free journey, void of any struggle. Hey why not live on easy street and turn a blind-eye to everything else if you can right?? LoL. Freedom… in that tone, also correlates to ones popularity, namely career titles and “achievements” among their peers and friends. Aka… the surface approval, the known ground perceptions of freedom, all stemming from, the fundamental known DESIRES to survive or thrive… materially having social connections. Whereas, Strong inner-values, morals, ethics, integrity, purpose are not known through the creation of man’s myth all around us, flooding our senses with what we see and hear. As the movie said… “Our integrity sells for so little”… “when all I was doing was telling the truth”. That my love… is the “normalcy” of the “collective-personality” commanding how we are to feel and what we are to think. If that common, societal personality were loving and virtuous… could we acknowledge this world being fair? The collective, stagnant inherited personality of man and his desires, is why this world is fucked-up and soulless in the first place.
As V perfectly responded to Evey… he said to her… “Is that what YOU think… or is that what ‘they’ want you to think??”
Fear makes us think. That’s the problem.
you’re on fire!
hey did you see episode of seinfeld where george decides to do the opposite of everything he has done or said before.instead of saying no he says yes and vice versa..says he hates something when he likes it.. he gets the job , the girl etc .. a newfound confidence…hehe .. meanwhile jerry believes everything always evens out for him.. so if george is up elaine is down and viceversa so elaine cos things arent going well for her( she’s getting kicked out of her apartment, got dumped)thinks she is turning into george and freaks out. funny episode, ahh george. costanza.
Thanks for your kind thoughts previuously Umm.
Seinfeld? yeah it’s a funny show, a different kind of show. George though, to me… is a neurotic, fearful CYNIC about all stuff happening in his life, which makes it funny to watch (at his expense) from an objective sideline. He’s just your crazy neighbor who has nothing better to do with his time, than bicker and complain about how the whole world is against him. haha.
That’s not my reality darling, hm… but I can certainly ‘understand’ his cynical, boisterous fears.
SPEAK YOUR TRUTH, REGARDLESS IF YOU ARE AFRAID. may be I should speak the truth that I had felt is better kept in silence, kept silent for the seek of love…for the seek of my fear of harming the souls of those I love/care.
I’m suspicious of the concept of unconscious desire, unconscious love, unconscious anything in a relationship dynamic… it had felt too much like the emperor’s new clothing… I’ve searched, believe me, high and low, deep as deep can go… I found nothing there that isn’t something I had already felt with substance: a sleeping seed, a potential of something vast and unknown… I tried very hard to capture every moment when I felt awakened, but… it didn’t last… letting go is too easy, I feel too “normal” to be in something already profound in ways I “suppose” to feel profound in a personal love. If in truth I cannot differentiate nothing from unconsciousness, it felt too real to be nothing… on that intimate personal level. On the cosmic level, I love you intensely for your quest for truth and justice, but it is vastly different from what I had felt before, that heart ranching feeling of separation (sorry…it had to be said)… It feels too much like what Evy said, he is me, he is you, he is everyone….I will never forget him. and life moves on from there…with gratitude and appreciation and an eternal cosmic love.
If I don’t figure this out, trust what I felt inside in consciousness, I would end up messing people’s heart consciously with the blind believe of unconsciousness, even if I was invited to. How can you trust something I don’t even feel to be real?
How can I feel forever when I don’t even feel today?
Is truth welcomed as expressed? or is it harming and better kept in silence? a healthy dose of uncertainty.
“How can you trust something I don’t even feel to be real?”
I am not an expert, but it would seem to me that Trust is not a hardcore criteria determining the existance of reality or truth. What determines this existance would be our capacity to SEE it. The more we see it, the more we “trust” it and incorporate it in our daily living reality. So what if you are a bit different? I have incredibly accute hearing and I hear much higher frequencies that normal people do not hear. This was normal for me…but not normal for the people that were around me. It created a bunnyish – skittish hypersensitivity, and people looked at me, when I jumped to noises, that they could not hear. But it was REAL to me – and REAL to those instruments that were measuring my hearing.
In the unreal or unknown…yes/no/maybe does not exist, only energy.
Take your chances JoJo…and jump!
…and it felt harder and harder to feel awakened…as if whatever openness offered is unreal… what is real… is the constant whipping awaits me at the next corner… yet to avoid these whippings, I had to lie or avoid my inner realism, or become something I’m not, which I cannot do, so silence feels so true and warm.
As I see this rare time of precious openness from you…nothing moves inside of me in that intimate way anymore, and it’s heart breaking to have to say it out loud…this is what everything comes to now…on that intimate level… what does it mean? I have my answer…I’ve closed up…but you might have your own answer from what you feel… I’m so very very sorry.
Close Intimacy is discoverd through the cosmic, and the cosmic is expanded within a meaningful human intimacy. The connection of the whole. Not ‘the hole’ found and sewn together during a superficial “love”.
If I wanted, I could attach my life fully, to a superficial love interest tomorrow. It’s that easy. But I refuse. Everyone else does so… why don’t I just date every bunny in town?? sounds exciting, seducing and ravishing every little fox who wants a challenge … well as I have become… that’s not what was planned for me in this physical incarnation, in this life.
If I were to die tonight in a loud car accident, I would at least feel content knowing I have expressed what was going on within me. That is freedom to me.
Don’t be sorry JoJo. I’ve never wanted your apologies. I know who you are in essence. Nurture your soul, and you will know the energy of forever.
Thank you for your understanding…you are a beautiful man.
…My first second reaction is to stop here, what I would normally do, and proceed with my silence… but the self stretching means doing things we normally wouldn’t do. So… I’m going to explain myself… I know the hurt would follow if I don’t say anything of the whys of what I do…I’m different from anyone I know… and it’s to be expected people do not understand me if I don’t make an effort to explain myself…
….I know hurt would follow my silence because what usually happens in a usual relationship dynamics… people engage in bargaining of givings… I see it all the time, most people hold back what they can give, and give one inch when one inch is given to them, so they naturally expected to get something back via their own incremental openness, most people have been trained this way by past relationships… it’s no one’s fault, it’s the way relationship was learned…
With me, I give everything I have inside of me to give at the moment I submit to my feelings…meaning I give 100% of the seed if I’m seeding, I give 100% of the tree if I’m blossoming…regardless what the other returns. But no matter what I give, seeds and trees do not grow against the flow of the Cosmo, it can’t survive with only openness to sunshine and rain drops in darkness and drought… so the seed or tree try to grow on its own life force, its liver, its heart, its lungs… and eventually, all the nutrition run out…the organs just don’t function anymore… the sunshine and the rain drops pour on it…I watch in tears…no life returns.
This is why in a dynamic with me, when people give more of themselves they had held back, they feel betrayed I still behave the same as before, I don’t act in the “usual” expectation of what relationship is to them… My giving is the sum of who I am, it’s the sum of my feelings and integrity at the moment of my own acknowledgement of my feelings… unless there is a substance change in situations, when people gave that one inch in them to me, I have nothing left to gave, I already gave the inches in me to them freely prior that moment of expectation…in acts, or voice, or silence. the seed or tree could grow more inches if that sunshine or raindrop didn’t withdraw as a reaction to the feeling of betrayal/hurt…but they don’t, they withdraw…everyone has been trained by what relationship was to them.
I know when I leave… it feels like all the air has gone out their lungs…becasue that’s the nature of my love, like my nature, like air… I’ve gaven what people needed when they don’t realize they have it, they need it…until its gone. and they feel incredible pain that nothing will bring it back…but they don’t understand… I didn’t do it as a punishment to them, I love them, already and always… it’s just…I don’t leave unless the air has gone out of me first, I’m the one who couldn’t breath before anyone felt that suffocation of void. And I don’t know how to change it once it has reached that point “close up”.
I say these things… so many people had felt it was vanity, full of myself…if you can imagine this is the way I am, so many people who had encountered me before had already told me what’s been told…but it’s not true.
vanity is insatiable, it’s purpose is to feed that insatiable ego, it won’t stop when it had any sign of success…with me… when truth in me was said, once is enough… all I want to do… is sink into the deep deep silence, like a womb, where healing begins… I hope those who love me will gave me this peace… I’m not indifferent, silence in intensity is not the peaceful rest I need so badly now…
Thank you for all your love.
JoJo…
In a previous comment, you said something the resonated with me…I have mentioned it before and I want to mention it again…it dealt with the fact that scorpio would not give the last dime to the poor, but would return and rebuild the whole town?
DUTY again…through love. I sometimes feel that silence from the heart does have it purpose…these are VERBS of love that can transform and transcend us.
The heart can not be closed…breathe in deeply.
Spring starts to come.
Hi P.Puppy,
“If I were to die tonight in a loud car accident, I would at least feel content knowing I have expressed what was going on within me. That is freedom to me.”
Sounds a bit like my Hades…and what I truly wish for the people I love.
Are free people capable of loving? What will be the building blocks of the society that V fought scorpionically so hard to “de-illusion”? What fills the hearts and minds of “free” people?
Evy left V alone, once her will “TO BE” was fired up. She failed to go beyond enlightenment…which is DUTY. She did not find love in her will TO BE only cleansing (water). Not like V…who burned. So she is “pure” but does not “burn”. He burned…even for her.
Nice that she got the house and all of the goodies though.
“…Are free people capable of loving?…”
Freedom, in it’s purist expression… is in the heart and in consciousness, to me. Freedom, through the wisdom of the heart, is also a merciful, brave warrior who destroys any impure energies, deceit or intent by another, in addition through ones-self. Because ones soul has been, resurrected, via the virtue of suffering in death… if one betrays the themself of that salvation, one cannot “live-free” in the guilt of that shame, in the guilt of any artificiality and the guilt of that immense self-deceit. Do you follow??
You see… freedom inherantly knows the feeling of guilt and shame. Freedom knows our Shadow, intimately well. Versus, a lower-self personality which does not “see” or “feel”… guilt… or fear… or shame… in ones-core-self. Blind toward the manifested reality of ones deeds and ones intentions in life.
“…What will be the building blocks of the society that V fought scorpionically so hard to “de-illusion”?…”
Like I have said before, globally speaking, there is no such thing as a perfectly loving utopia in this human existence. There are pockets of it around the world but it is less than 5% of our population. We as a people are not as advanced as our ancient bloodline. The ancients didn’t have Justin Beiber or Lady Gaga to worry about, in order to find an identity.
There have been, a few amazing people over the course of history who were immensely brave societal reformers. Iconoclasts. Each one of those iconoclasts sacrficed much of their lives for the betterment and development of man and consciousness itself. Their visionary plight, their personal sacrifce… wanted equality, wanted justice, wanted progress among the collective soul of man.
But this progress Gatubela, has been very slow. We may even go ‘backwards’ as a people to define the soul, the love in human beings through means of artificial technology, cerebral advancement, detachment from the heart and feelings all together.
Watch the movie “Repo Men” and you might understand what I’m talking about.
Gatubela…find stillness within…
See it through the closed eyes of Cosmo… ask… can the eyes been trained by life as we lived, see air jumping? can the jumping of air be seen? yes… it can only be felt, that’s why one only feel it fully when it’s gone. Every trained feelings of the games of life, the emotional current attached to what life had taught them, feel every part of the game… does one feel real love? does one feel respected? cared for? understood? accepted? treated with truth? willingness? weighted heavily his rights, feeling, roots with every response? can you feel real love when it stares you in the face? with a heart that lives in what life was to you? see your anger… where it rooted? “love” can be alluring, used, as “integrity” was used…when a heart can not see the user in oneself… if one do not close one’s eyes, and see.
I love you so I cannot embrace my silence although I need it more than it will ever be understood, but can you love me back in stillness? because when someone loves you, even on their sick bed, they live your stress…
When I say sick bed…I mean I’m damaged… I really mean it…
Yet nothing here has the substance to fix me…I had to go back to where I was born…in the air, to be whole again, somewhere so far beyond anything’s reach… it calls to me, it said “come here so the holes in your heart, on your soul can be patched up with the essence of who you are”…warmth and in that beautiful silence. You see, real love allows separation…even permanent ones, when that detachment render me an on looker instead in it… I can’t love…that’s not what real love is, I can’t love even if I will it…I stayed because I love, I leave also because I love.. I hope this explanation makes sense to you.
Hi JoJo…
“You see, real love allows separation…even permanent ones, when that detachment render me an on looker instead in it… I can’t love…that’s not what real love is, I can’t love even if I will it…I stayed because I love, I leave also because I love.”
Strange…when I feel my stillness, it feels like someone is inside of me…and it ain´t me! And I feel like someone is beside me on my right hand side.
Probably not the same thing with you! Leave if you need to. I want to understand but leaving has never been an option for me. Even when I required healing…I had to survive – damaged, battered and wounded, with no dignity and being constantly humiliated. Most people do not understand this part of me.
Again…but 14 years of being in a relationship have taught me… that you can never leave…and you can never stay. And that you can stay, but you must leave. So, you will have to put up with the stress – it is part of the bargain. I have put up with worse…or better. It is the same…and it is all different. We all must be separated to understand connection…to understand that we are never separated and that we are always connected.
I hope you understand. DUTY and LOVE tell me to stay…and not leave anyone or anything undone because I burn with what I see and feel in my stillness…
I prefer the harsh reality of my life…so I open my eyes and face the fact that I was and am damaged – HERE. I refuse to escape it. Therefore, my healing will be HERE. The same path in…is the same path out.
I understand that it is not so for you…but I wanted you to understand as well.
I hope YOU understand.
Gatubela,
Life is everywhere, battle ground is everywhere, here is everything, but everything is not only here… when something should move inside doesn’t move any more, at moments real feeling reaches out towards me… what does it mean? it means I will be messing with people’s heart in the real sense from this moment on, this is the real “bell of truth” motivated my “leaving”, this is what integrity is to me…I didn’t leave when the “damage” happened… while it last…while I can still feel… the stretchy road of self explanation, in human nature, means you lay on the table your innards for the pickers to find an easy target, in a world void of real love…so that explanation is something I lay quietly on the table, what you do with it…truly, is beyond my control.
It’s time for silence.
Hi JoJo,
“it calls to me, it said “come here so the holes in your heart, on your soul can be patched up with the essence of who you are”…warmth and in that beautiful silence.”
Your virtue speaks well of you…when most would have fallen into illusion.
What will I do with that explanation? I thank you for having the kindness in giving it to me. The price of “giving a hoot” is actually exposing those innards…but the price of duty…is loving those innards and striving to patch them up, by doing everything within my capacity – however limitted they may be. There are greater people and smarter people than myself, but I stubbornly insist on doing my part.
Heartful bunny fuzz on those innards is actually quite soft you know…so they were nicely protected in my heart too.
Thank you for your words of love…I was not expecting them. That made all the difference. I respect your calm resolve that you have shown and I actually feel that it is alright to let go now. Why? because before, you were very much in pain. Now, you express strong will in healing.
I wish you the most beautiful music that there is in the universe.
“And I don’t know how to change it once it has reached that point “close up”.”
“How can I feel forever what I don´t feel today?”.
I have my experiences on this one. Once I reached the point where the honey moon was over, I learned that I was fickle, unreasonable, selfish etc. I depended on good treatment of me, in order for me to “love” him. I learned that I did not need anyone to treat me nicely, in order to do what had to be done. This does not go well with society by the way. But what it does do, is make you a pillar of strength. You become the point where the polarizing energies converge. Life and death are the same…because you don´t need life in order to live, and you don´t need death in order to die. You learn to live with out one, then the other, then with double death and double life. Every combination of them. You don´t need air, water, earth, metal, fire or wood to live. True balance is found in the fluid flowing dynamic opposite of who you are…and although extra air is nice…I can survive with out it by establishing balance.
The problem of painful separation and the air going out of someone´s lungs is because they depended on something that was not theirs in the beginning.
So…my husband did not treat me better, even if I gave him the moon and the stars…and all of his dreams coming true. And although I cry and sniffle…it does not take away my strength. It won´t matter if I show him the way to heaven. What matters…is that I KNEW the way to heaven… Unity and connectedness”… life and death are the same…and it is possible to “love” your killer…or free your jailer … or…if necessary, enslave your jailor and kill your lover.
Freedom to choose, makes all the ouchie worth it. And while the air was there “in my lungs”, I placed no attachment on it.
As I have said, I don´t recommend my experiences, but I can share the lessons that I have learnt. Love is beyond our attachment to other people´s gifts to us.
Gatubela, thank you for sharing this comment way back on post 285.
“… Perhaps, you have noticed, as have I , a strange memory loss or amnesia that abusive people have? The lies and the strange justifications that are given? Its quite incoherant…”
Excuses, self-deceptions and blatant lies rule this fearful, rational human world. An “innocent” person… their ends…. always seem to justify their self-interested means. Their manifestations of “honesty” are true… TO THEM… Is it any wonder why this world is sick, intolerable and cruel in the first place? Does Hitler’s “opinions” of his truth, JUSTIFY his deeds? I could point out the same neurosis about your boss at work, I could same about your mother or father, friend or lover. People “think” that Truth is merely “an opinion” as each person would see it. Hahahaha… is it any wonder that their ‘reality of Truth’ is not the essential cause and catalyst for such chaos, pain and evil among us?
Your realism of life and it’s insight is why I love you Gatubela.
Hi P.Puppy,
That is probably one of the nicest things someone has ever said to me.
Darn it! Gotta put the bunny fuzz back on to cover up those panties. Was naked for a while…
Yup…smiling…and hopping among all the death I see.
Every woman wants…
When I started learning strology, I was happy to have something in Scorpio, even if it was the Moon. Scorpio, the sign of passion, strength, danger and challenge, but also the sign of true tragedy, hurt and fate’s inevitability, seemed very special to me at that time. But it didn’t take me long to realize that true evil and tragedy indeed exist, because my Moon in Scorpio has undoubtedly from the moment of my first significant loves, untill the moment I understood my place in the family and world, exhibited its dark side. That is why today, as an astrologer with fifteen years of experience for this sign of obssession and destiny’s fatality I have only one word – respect.
Every planet in Scorpio has only one need, only one ambition – to die in order to perhaps be born again.
That applies also to the Moon, that represents sentiments, imagination, tenderness, romance, compassion, comiseration. Positioned in Scorpio in someones chart it always indicates that the person will, through his life experience, go through various dramas that will have only one goal: to kill all that is made of the finest sentiments. So it sometimes seems impossible to be happy, because in his greatest laughter and joy, the person summons this frantic avalanche to engulf him, which is why, when everything is just right and idyllic, along comes a telephone call informing of some one’s death or an argument at the dinner table on a Holy Day which ruins the family forever, or here comes a bomb that kills all who are in the house. That’s why the person subconsiously compromises with himself never to be too happy, never to love too much, get too committed, for all that brings only one thing to him: fear and trepidation for those who are in his thoughts. And every love must die, must come to an end and leave its scars. And that is why it is easiest to stay alone. To be alone. To be far and inaccesible, as others often see them. It is easier to live out of the reach and care of others. To kill emotions, to kill the soul and gentleness, to hurt those that are nearest, which people with Moon in Scorpio will often do, but only in order to make it easier on themselves. So they could suffer ten times more than the person they left without goodbye, than the one they uttered venomous words to and then turned around and left going down a road of their own for which they often don’t care where it leads; since in the end everything leads to the grave. Not caring for the value of life is common here; there only exists a great desire for life not to be empty, for it not to turn into boredom and waiting for something to happen. This is the reason these people don’t stop, they burn from day to day, attracting to them the most dangerous and the most vicious and tragic of characters, attracting danger and consiously provoking life itself, or is it rather death itself.
Since the Moon pertains to the genes inherited from the mother’s side, usually all women in the family are of such a destiny: always prepared for the worst and for the end, although to others they give away the impression of live energy, vulcanic passion and strength, often making better people of those they come in touch with along the way. They never forget the end moment, death, the tragedy that must happen in everything, for everything has its beginning and its end. And as if that is where their salvation lies, as if that constant presence of the end, as the Sword of Damocles floating above them saves them from the terror of believing that anything can be eternal. This is why there is no sorrow here, only silence and passion. These women are special, they have a true strength that does not stand for the monotony of everyday, but are finding a thousand chores for themselves, pushed by an everlasting energy, while everyone watching them admires their strength and untiredness. Usually in the family more women are born than men (my mother has two sisters, and every one of them has daughters) and every one of them is special, strong, passionate and often times alone, sometimes spends her whole life without ever being kissed although she is beautiful and sensual. The damnation of passion, the damnation of fantasy, the damnation of emotion that dreams of a love or a peaceful home must now die forever. Of course, this doesn’t mean that they won’t have a home and family later, but forever bordered by the trepidation and sense that all of that can come down at any minute. Not only women, but also men with this position of the Moon carry within them an inevitability, that values life only when it resembles a sort of true struggle, a jump into a volcano; often found in charts of dangerous, fanatic characters that readily launch themselves in the path of danger and death. Women will also constantly be drawn to challenges, and it will solely depend on how much they will consiously live out their strength and how much they will turn it into fear whether their lives turn out to be tragic, bordered with solitude and how healthy they will be, physically and mentally.
However, life does not leave them in peace, so the moment always happens when danger knocks on their door, whether in the form of a change that will constitute a basic change in their life, or a person of demonic passion for whom women and men with the Moon in Scorpio can again feel all that long forgotten rapture. This woman will more readily live in the dream of this one that she has had for only one night, but who was the embodiment of sexual energy equal to her own, and with that readily accept loneliness, than will she go to meet some new love of a weaker intensity. That moment of challenge is the moment of the greatest emotion that these people have the privilege of knowing through their lives. True passion, true rapture, true belonging that is not possessiveness but rather a complete abandonement to the moment that exists, after which, as these people know, the end must come.
In practical terms, these are women warriors, front liners, they live for the revolution, they overturn destinies, not only their own but also those of others, they enforce change in everyone that comes close to them, and it often belongs to women surgeons, healers… The home is often times close to a cemetary or a river, that again, in its symbolism only reminds us of the passing of everything, and that everything in this world must have its beginning and its end.
…taken from a site i read, so not my words obviously. but this is very me.i live by the sea and a river not so far away. “the passing of everything..” is what i feel at every given moment.
Hi Umm,
Like you want to hold on to it, but for some reason…it passes.
It can be transformed…if you hold on to it. It won´t stay the same…but it becomes something more real.
hmm.. holding onto it. can you tell me what this means for you.. holding onto what?
All I want is the wind in my hair
To face the fear but, not feel scared
Wild horses I wanna be like you
Throwing caution to the wind
I’ll run free too………………………………
so true……..
I have my rules, my dos and don’ts, my fears…
But deep inside… I honestly want to surrender wholeheartedly …
Damn all the consequences! I am so tired to even think of the consequences.
Am just waiting for the moment… when it feels right…
I will definitely jump in.. head first.
I don’t mind go tumbling down cartoon style and land on my back…twitching… ouch!!!
Love that wind in my hair while walking..
It makes me feel confident and fierce..
hmmmn love the song..
Thanks for sharing the song PPuppy! 🙂
Hi Umm,
For me? That everything must pass by…but if we hold on to it…it is eternal. By being who (who-le) we are, we can “touch” everything there is…as it flows in us and through us. How we hold is a state of surrender. We can love and give, and it affects the whole river…and everything in it.
Seeing the end of something or the death of something…means we love as if today was the last day. So I can die tomorrow…because I lived today.
ok.. yes that is something very beautiful. holding onto by way of surrendering to letting it flow through, and remaining whole . not always an easy feat hey. sometimes i feel like i cant let go.. even if i am sitting in the bush, by myself,i get so many emotions sometimes( when i am locked down by fear stuff) and its like i am almost jealous of the trees and the plants.. i want to be them.. i want to be that existence of quiet and “is-ness”, where there is nothing to prove, and nothing to say. life and death seem somehow without anything else attached to it. it just is. often i dont want to leave.i can feel myself clinging.cos i know i will have to go back to the other world stuff.. all the manmade crap and shit and the defenses will go up.. which then makes me sad cos i dont feel free anymore.inside maybe.. but its like i have to fight again.this isnt always the case but its something i have to be aware of .when i am flowing and accepting and there is no shame or fear and i feel strong as a woman, whole, ok,i am an earthling(hehe) and i accept life..and the concept of time changes and there is no clinging and no attachment, and i feel so open but protected , safe. I havent surfed for two months and went out yesterday.. it felt so good to be in the water again even if it was freezing. felt like the free me was there still..i have felt so bogged down lately .. by life decisions, stress, fears, anxiety. it has been like death death death with no life.i watched this great spanish movie last night..mediterranean food.she’s a great chef, an artist with food, and with life and follows her heart.true to herself.she has a menage au trois. and it works.they are all happy.and she cooks the most wonderful food
Hi Umm… Spanish is actually the 5 languages that are spoken in Spain. Castellano is what is spoken in Latin America and it is a beautiful language. It is like more feeling is expressed in a word…very intense and scorpionic! You should hear the love songs…the passion that the men convey in their music for the woman they love is like a being in a dream.
Is surfing (Freedom – life) equivalent to the menage a trois (life and “something that I really don´t know about” – I guess…) – and following your heart, in the movie?
I used to cook alot…and made bread every day. It was yummy!
HI Gatubela,
yes the Spanish are very passionate and feisty, they feel what they feel! no holding back! I would like to hear this language Castellano, do you speak it? I am half Italian (from the southern side) and I love that language too.And I love to cook too!! Homemade bread-mmm.I like to cook Italian and also asian , lots of veggies and healthy stuff. and i do like cheese.. and yoghurts, nice breads, chocolate,fresh fruits. I made a yummy antipasto the other day with roasted eggplant and fennel from my garden.fresh basil..love food.
Surfing is a good feeling. It is a solo thing though. but i do feel connected to the water and the wave and the hills around me. there was a whale not far from me the other day.A humpback.. maybe we couldve got it on? sorry bad joke. surfing is like following my heart.and it does feel sensual, feeling the water on my skin smelling the salt. but i still like cuddles.That movie just got me thinking and feeling. …the supportive man who will marry her, be there for her, want children with her, be sweet and kind and devoted etc.. but she is passionate and creative and something is still missing from her life, she knows she isnt a housewife.but she loves her home.and she loves him. but there is fire in her belly.
the other man..who represents passion and he is dangerous and sexy and
knows the creative force like nobody else( except maybe her!). he doesnt expect her to be at home doing dishes everyday, he understands her need to create, he sees her come alive when she creates and he knows that this is when she is most beautiful, its in her eyes, her smell, the way she moves, he is excited by her and wants to nurture her passion.
two very different men.
but both important in her life. so she decides it is best for everyone if they all live together.
i guess it would be a rare occurrence that this would happen in real life.
Yes…that is a rare occurance…a man that knows the creative force that is. It is always an honour to get to feel the life of such a man.
The manifestation of Hades through persephone, clearly shows his wishes for “earth” – balance of life and death. His “light” is shown through the return of persephone to earth and her return to the underworld. Everywhere we look, we are looking and feeling HIS LIGHT.
I also used to cook alot…and incorporated medicinal herbs in the meals for the people I was cooking for.
Yes, I speak castellano – claro que hablo castellano!!! Pero me costo aprender debido a que la gramatica es differente y mas dificil!!!
Latin american culture is passionate, but the economical situation is not. There is a clear class system here.
I love your freedom umm…how you take life and live it!
medicinal herbs in cooking wow…talk again soon. love the langauage x
I die of love ~
…and every bunny… neeeeds…
The translation to the song in Castellano…Me muero de amor.
Te marchaste sin palabras : You (just) left (with out saying anything). (without words)
Cerrando la puerta : Closing the door
Justo cuando te pedía un poco más : Just when I was asking you for a little more
Un poco más : A little more
El miedo te alejó del nido : Fear made you go farther away from the nest
Sin una respuesta : With out an answer
Dejando un corazón herido : Leaving a wounded heart Dejándome atrás : Leaving me behind
Y ahora me muero de amor si no estás : And now I die of love, if you are not here
Me muero y no puedo esperar : I die, and I can not wait
A que vuelvas de nuevo aquí : That you come back here again Junto a mí, con tus besos… : Beside me, with your kisses Es que me muero de amor si no estás : It is that I die of love, if you are not here Me muero y no puedo esperar : I die, and I can not wait Necesito tenerte aquí, junto a mí : I need to have you here, next to me Sin tu amor no puedo vivir : Without your love, I can not live Entre tus papeles descubrí una carta : Within your papers, I discovered a letter Sólo en líneas apretadas frases sin razón : only in “tight” lines, phrases, that made no sense Dices que el motivo fue la falta de aire : You say that the reason was the lack of air Si siempre te dejé ser libre: But I always let you be free Sin una condición : Without any conditions Dime que no es verdad : Tell me that it is not true Que voy a despertar : That I will wake upCerca de tu piel : Near your skin Igual que hasta ayer…: The same as (since) yesterday
A part of my life that I have “phoenixed” out…I will move on now.
This music is called reggaeton…and it sure makes the tush move…it is played during parties here. I wanted to share a bit of the music…while we are on the topic.
Here is the translation with a bit of an explanation.
Verse 1:
Pobre diabla
Se dice que se te ha visto por la calle vagando,
Llorando por un hombre que no vale un centavo,
Pobre diabla y llora por un pobre diablo.
[x2]
Poor woman
It is said that you have been seen wandering the streets,
Crying for a man who is not worth a cent,
Poor woman and she cries for a poor devil.
[x2]
Verse 2:
————————————————
Que no te valorizó nunca y que nunca lo hará,
Que sólo te hizo llorar,
Pero tú lo amas.
Who did not value you and who never will,
Who only made you cry,
But you love him.
Que no te valorizó,
Cuando con besos te hechizó,
Que sólo te utilizó y hasta te embarazó.
Who did not value you,
When with kisses he enchanted you,
Who only used you and even impregnated you.
————————————————
[Verse 1, “Pobre diabla…”]
Se te ve llorar, llorar,
Sólo llorar, llorar,
Ya no bailas más,
Llorar, todo es llorar, llorar.
You are seen crying, crying,
Only crying, crying,
You do not dance anymore,
Crying, everything is crying, crying.
[Verse 1, “Pobre diabla…”]
[Verse 2, “Que no te valorizó nunca y que nunca lo hará…”]
[Verse 1, “Pobre diabla…”]
Pobre diabla llora por mí,
Yo soy tu pobre diablo,
Pobre diabla llora por mí,
Soy tu pobre diablo.
Poor woman cries for me,
I am your poor devil,
Poor woman cries for me,
I’m your poor devil.
Pobre diabla, pobre diabla, pobre diabla.
Poor woman, poor woman, poor woman.
Translation Notes:
Se dice que se te ha visto por la calle vagando
It is said that you have been seen wandering the streets
(Se dice) que (se [te] ha visto) (por la calle) (vagando)
(It is said) that (it has been seen [of you]) (by the street) (wandering)
“se ha visto [de ti]” = lit. it has been seen [of you]
“se te ha visto” means approximately the same thing, with different syntax
The syntax matches phrases like:
“te vi” = I saw you
“te he visto” = I have seen you
“se te ha visto” sounds passive and impersonal. Society has seen you, the walls have seen you, the air has seen you, etc.
—
diabla [noun, f.] = (woman) devil
diablo [noun, m.] = (man) devil
pobre diablo [noun, m.] = poor devil, poor man (idiom)
The gender pairs emphasize that they go together.
it is a strong language.
glad you pheonixed out that part of your life..
im so tired.
feel like Ive been battling for a long time.
cya
Hi Umm,
Yes, it is a strong language…
What are you battling for?
Gatubela, speaking of flowers:
A pinkish or reddish, ‘closed’… Rose Bud… is akin to a woman’s vulva. Her Divinity. The Holy Grail. That pretty vulva… in mystical symbolism, channels back to all my comments regarding the innate power women have held over men throughout time, just by being…….. women.
This tremendous sexual power, her (yin energy) vulva… which magnetizes men into doing and behaving stupidly, immorally, carelessly, mindlessly and abusively… are manifestations of true evil we actually see in our world today and long since past, i.e… incessant egotism, unprincipled scruples, rape, naive wars, political domination, social hedonism, pure greed (in order to present “a false sense” of security)… enslavement, etc. So men see their reactions to a woman’s energy as ‘an act of love’. Um… yikes.
Btw, of course men also throughout time… have been victims of this same insufferable abuse of power from class-righteous, ethnicity-fearful, blatant ignorance and divisive deeds from other men too.
So this powerful energy of sexual transmutation… felt in the heavenly vessel found between a woman’s legs… is in fact… a large existential desire WHY we have extreme evil, crime, greed and control in the material (non soul) world. An infantile soul, both on an intimate person-to-person level, and on a collective universal level. The seen, or known world of man’s created Myths, his illusion to create, dominates this reality we live today. We live among “the conceived” ideas of truth. Yet it’s not the Truth. That is why the word conceived begins with the letters “CON”.
So men, women and their “brain noise” do not breathe IN STILLNESS in this existence. Their attachments to survival, cut-throat career games and excess… controls, directs the attitudes known throughout our daily fearful lives.
This mockery of divine energy, is why women everywhere, need the force of a street wise hero to slay intangible dragons within her soul, and to conquer any demons around her playful blur. This is necessary for the hero, in order to rescue her blinded bliss, transform her damaged heart and ease her suffocating psychological and emotional free-fall.
A woman’s sexual power which influence the fate of men… stirs FEAR inside the weak male. He manifests those fears outward… through his work, outward through his desperation for significance with money and titles, through his actual relating capacity, through his sense of inner self-discipline, through his virtue and gallantry or lack thereof. So women…you need only look into your past… into your husbands/boyfriends or friends behaviors, and your perceptions of that behavior, then realize that (veiled) psychology was once understood as ‘the real’ him… when in truth, ‘it was’ the real him. The comforting news gained from experience is that he is not the exception in males. Sadly, as you will eventually see… he is the very common rule.
Pluto.
Hi P.Puppy,
“So men, women and their “brain noise” do not breathe IN STILLNESS in this existence.”
lalalalalalala….LOL!!!
Trying to make more noise in order to distract the eagle.
Look!!! Over there!!! What´s that!!!????
The secrets of balance are found in the essence level and not on the manifestion of the symptoms and illness level.
Yin – heaven
Yang – fire
The mixture of the two is the chinese secret of transformation through the 5 movements.
Some eagles burn toasty woasty alright…
Mothers can remember the physical birth of their child, unless of course they were sedated. I’m sure, just about every single Sanguine beauty on the face of this planet has “thought about” giving birth to a bundle of innocence. It’s natural.
I say these things because… “the stillness” I mention above, is exactly ‘what’ new-born (under 3 months) babies are. Still. Godly. Their little blush faces look around this new universe in absolute Wonderment. Their divine being, their soulful essence… ‘is Still’… within. In those early months ‘they are completely Free’ from the lumping bombardment of brain and heart clutter which a developed personality naturally sucks-up like a thirsty sponge. A new-born baby is ego-less, UNTIL… it starts projecting and identifying with the Stuff in their outside environment. This new universe they’re now apart of, is nothing like the Peace they had known, nestling inside the womb. Unless of course, pregnant mom likes smoking, drinking, rollerblading and partying amid loud noises, or mom is in emotional distress fighting with the father who behaves like an adolescent.
Stillness, gotta love it. Feel the beautiful inner-peace of a baby as you see their uncomplicated being, simply… exist.
That is Self-mastery. It is in essence, “becoming the inner-state” of that divine little baby every moment in adulthood.
The womb (birth) is peace. The journey to the tomb (death) ‘should’ also be in utter peace. So many people die of a miserly, painful, toxic death.
So then…
Due to their divine stillness or “empty space” in mind, heart and soul… I am unable to laser-read a baby’s mind, thoughts or motivational paradigms… except when they’re hungry or thirsty for moms milk. Their essential minds and hearts immortally exist through Time and Space. That is the miracle, to me. That baby is Pure Consciousness itself. Free of egoistic strangulation, free of imitation and free of approval. In my idealogical mind, I feel that this is what real Love energy should “be” in all human beings… to tranquilly exist, because we are all breathing, feeling miracles.
My continuous passage through extreme deaths of ego reality… resurrections of heart and soul… have given me incredible meaning and affirmations of this divine cycle exisiting within our souls.
Peace people.:)
“I feel that this is what real Love energy should “be” in all human beings… to tranquilly exist, because we are all breathing, feeling miracles.”
My love energy does not feel like this…tranquilly existing…but I am working on it. LoL!!!
Hmmmmm…..
Nope…it ain´t letting me be “tranquil” because it does not want to be contained.
Scorpionic love energy is probably more dignified than mine, however.
“This mockery of divine energy, is why women everywhere, need the force of a street wise hero to slay intangible dragons within her soul, and to conquer any demons around her playful blur.”
I include myself in this category…along with the question “When will I finally learn?” There are times that I just want to throw it all in…and go live away from “the world”. Subtle yin/yang interactions occur between men and women, women and women, and men and men, as we all have this energy in some quantity or other.
Yin receives the projections of these “fears”…through unbalanced yang interactions. Unbalanced yin / yang people…give away their “yang” and adopts the stronger “yang” (It could be collective).
Therefore, if someone is not empowered during a relationship, they are not balanced. Also, it is an indication of “intention” as manifested by the yang. Without this balance – or individuality established, then Yin descending and Yang ascending…to meet and transform, will not occur.
The damage caused and inflicted by both women and men on eachother, is a result of this imbalance…and the projection of the predominant yang or “illusion”.
Imbalance = illusion
“…The damage caused and inflicted by both women and men on eachother, is a result of this imbalance…and the projection of the predominant yang or “illusion”…”
Yes, but let us not forget:
… That Men… “Plant their Seeds” inside women, inside the collective vessel and unconscious states or minds of men and women, and inside the aspirations… whether wholesome, virtuous, deceptive or evil… in children. Man’s creative seeds are manifesting perpetually as we speak, again… for good or evil… for evolution of the soul or devoling of the soul. So those intangible effects take-hold within society like personality wild-fire, as people in general “are Receptors and Believers” of what is fed to them, of what that specific myth “Means to them”, whether it’s consequential or not. The people who exist without a higher-value system or higher-core principle systems beyond material form (reality)… inherit… those seeds (or ideas) UNCONSCIOUSLY. Those people exist at the mercy of their “Un-Individuated” soul and spirit. Their spirit “follows” the plight of the frustrated herd of cows, the needy flock of sheep or the pageantry band of flamingos.
I point the finger directly at the male sex specifically being the cause for such evil, destruction and despair throughout human history. Because when we look carefully at the people throughout time who were in a position of Absolute Power, whom influence and choice for the masses, be it motivated for the Greater Good of for Pure-Self-Glorification… we have learned about the production of mostly… Men, 98% of the time. It is extremely rare to read about, to know about, or to see or comprehend… the soulless exploits of a Female dictatorship, a murder-queen, a money-slug corporate tyrant, a mass murderer, a disturbed sadist, a twisted rapist, a political fascist or head-of-state or church individual… pressing… “the Nuke button” on human-kind throughout history.
Women and Children alike, are the Receptors of Man’s energy. Men are the Penetrators of energy or the Instigators of energy in order to enable a… re-action. I have not known an army of women who were motivated to kill “the enemy” or a band of women who aim to steal the human rights and dignity from others. Men are the general Cause of How and Why each of these forces unionize and grow like a toxic monster out of self-control. The resulting forms we are all apart of in this dysfunctional game, is the energy of soul-entrapment (of the psyche) we all exist amid today.
The tragic foibles and lessons for each human soul to experience in this life and many other lives, is why we have an energy of God doing what it does.
To teach.
Women are the Love energy, just like babies. It is extremely rare to see a woman go to prison for raping men, serial-killing, pedophilia or genocide. I’m talking about the big crimes that make our world. That type of woman is the very, very rare exception.
So then… what does that mean for men? Who or What are they truly… in terms of energy… who are they really??
Well, that all depends on his soul, his mission from birth.
In my idealogical mind, I feel that this is what real Love energy should “be” in all human beings… to tranquilly exist, because we are all breathing, feeling miracles.
Everytime I want to tranquilly exist, creation gets me in the butt!
Here… I told you women, girls, babies, love to eat rainbows… it’s all the same tranquil energy.
stereotypically girly.generic. DISNEY.
No, what is stereotypical… is a another person looking at the obvious title of a company who completely misses the occult view and point of view of what was just expressed.
Yes, you’re right Umm. Go Disney!!!
That was the meat of my comment!
It’s so easy to be a lounge-chair critic, I have no problem with that. True.
What I do have a problem with, is the critic who so predictably has nothing to counter or share WHY they “think” something is stereotypical.
You’re right Umm. You’re not “girly” at alll. I should know better. You are “womanly”… so I will know better next time so I can prepare to stereotype that pea-brain perception aswell.
Can someone INTERESTING have something to say???… Please?
No, not you HarryPotter. You rock.
pea brain huh? why are you getting so worked up?ok. then. impatient boy so hungry arent you. you didnt have to attack me.just ask nicely .
stereotypical ..because-GENERALLY speaking( and that is at the crux of the whole stereotypical thing) people like to follow, they like to know their place in the world, religions same. they go along with the masses believing what they believe or told to believe.this makes them feel safe . they are trying to counter the fear of death.
most people dont question, they just take whats forced fed to them.i grew up with disney and the whole fairytale thing. it was magical and beautiful and seemed otherworldly. i remember first seeing ‘Fantasia” when I was a kid and was blown away.i lived most of my youth in a haze of my imagination.the prince on the horse coming to save me? nah… actually i was hanging out with the animals. i never felt like spending time making dolls pretty it all seemed really pointless and shallow to me. and boring. i wanted to be in nature, by the sea, or with animals and plants, climbing trees and building cubby houses. I was still a girl. female. and yes now i am a woman. and still a girl in many ways. sometimes i feel neither.
there are bad men out there who like gatubela said dont know a thing about love. like there are bad women. there are people who just dont understand. generalising takes away individuality.do you know a man that
has truly loved?
“…i wanted to be in nature, by the sea, or with animals and plants, climbing trees and building cubby houses…’
That little expression right there is the natural female love each woman on the planet imbibes… Until… her innocence is raped by the Underworld desires and minds of men.
..” do you know a man that has truly loved?…”
Ummm, let me see… hmmmmmm..
Yep. He’s the guy who “get’s all worked up” (at least you know I’m alive then hey?)… when really.. all those quakes are his passions manifesting. On a passion scale of 1 to 10… the highest level you have discovered from me, is maybe a 3.
I was a bit short with you Umm… but at least you know that I can love. A Seething Vigor is love. That is… if the vigor’s intent wants more from a moment as oppossed to going through the motions in a meaningless life. A Passive Indifference towards life and it’s lessons transmits a crippling weakness in human nature that I am finding not easy to ignore.
Truly loved? You’re apart of that love, right now silly.
k well can you put your bristles away and stop calling me silly. are you the only man that has loved. no. yes you were short with me and i am glad you got me to explain . i can be lazy. and well i know deep down that you understand the core of what i am saying. so hence I am lazy. but i know i need to express . like i said ages ago i feel it but i dont always have the words.yes i know what you mean by indifference. most people live by ignorance is bliss.
innocence is still there. no matter what. its a choice to keep .
the world is just overpopulated .. that is why there is so much confusion. humans have taken over too much of the world, dominated and raped the land and its resources. I am speaking generally. there are good people who are doing good things.. they plant trees, they protest the governments laws , they help the animals ,they fight to keep the river flowing, they understand and learn and respect traditional tribal culture( nonwhite man).they tread sensitively on the earth and only consume what is neccessary. they are generous with what they have and are kind hearted.imagine if everyone was trying to help the earth. if everybody did their own bit. bit by bit things would change. you can sabotage by giving up by letting it all get on top of you.. and i know the feeling so so well. i battle with it alot.
there are plenty of people who have chosen a different path to walk in life. maybe one day i will fully do it. i know i can be very happy living simply living close to nature without the mobile phones the computers and tv.. all that crap.
my senses are more fully acute more fully tuned in.
you are a man but you are not responsible for all men.
http://uasked.tumblr.com/
“Women are the Love energy, just like babies.”
Well…love energy is a filter…it is not only unicorns and rainbows. Opening your heart to GOD, filters out a lot of other stuff out there.
It is not only men…it is the women who do not filter out masculine values, before accepting them. But this is natural. Every person has their personal tastes in potential partners – none of us are clean slates. So, on a personal note, women “give value” to these big crimes. The only way to get out of them, is to usually face our own fears. And we don´t face them, because we do not place spiritual growth as a priority. Or…we don´t replace our current masculine brainwashed attitudes for a “higher power” – due to our lack of surrender to our own love energy.
The majority of women consciously surrender to their “minds” instead of to their “hearts”.
Those crimes that you mentioned, were not performed by men in love…they were performed by men, who have never known love.
If women are the love energy, as you have said, then we have not loved enough in this world, in order to change it and to change our men.
Love does not include “making the person feel good”, although this can be a pleasant side effect.
“…If women are the love energy, as you have said, then we have not loved enough in this world, in order to change it and to change our men…”
Interesting.
I will ask you:
Is it truthfully real that women have not loved enough??… as you have said.
Is it truthfully the fate of the Female sex “to change” their men?? because they have not loved enough… as you have said.
In my World:
A man, his innate spiritual responsibility, was put on this earth– TO CHANGE HIMSELF.
Tell me Gatubela…Do you call a man “a man”…who is incapable… of changing himself for the good??
I call that reality which is everywhere out there blind-love. Illusory love. The idea that women “are supposed” to change a man, is the exact reason why men do not change from the core… I’m talking about change…way beneath his persoanlity.
Independence of male and female love is unusual and strong. Because they are WHOLE as individuals to start with.
When the woman, CHOOSES men who cannot embody their own counsel, who cannot think, feel and BECOME of-themselves… what does that woman expect when she is constantly frustrated and when the myth of her motive to change him… is not changing him… because… he himself has no desire or moxie or the will to change himself??
Do you call a lack of man’s personal-growth on many important levels… A womans responsibility??
That is what you’re saying above.
Could it be Gatubela… according to the Shadow of man and his Deeds… that MEN “do not know HOW” to love???
IF they did know How to love, as a woman’s innate energy does… WHY is their conquest of women’s bodies? Why is their Conquest of territories and neighborhoods? Why is their Conquest of countries? Why is their Conquest of Civil-Rights over others? Why is their Conquest of financial sectors and resources? Why is their Conquest of Civil-Liberties and Arbitration over the have-not’s? Why is their Desire-Conquest over Humanity?
So that reality means… “LOVE” to you????
Men can obtain greatness without murder, conquest, greed and egoical need. The jewel of this earth already bestows us that bounty. But that is not reality now… is it.
IF, men knew their SHADOW and did something about it, women would not need to change a damned thing.
… Why is ‘THERE’ conquest…
Forgive my spelling errors.;)
“The idea that women “are supposed” to change a man, is the exact reason why men do not change from the core… I’m talking about change…way beneath his persoanlity.”
I was just trying to say that a woman who faces her fears, would know better and her heart would filter out alot masculine energy currently out there.
Her heart would be open – and her mind would listen to it. Controlling and trying to change a man really becomes irrelevant because as you said, two people who love eachother independently, have a much stronger connection. Or rather, they become the channel to something greater than themselves.
Good thing you are over there…otherwise we would probably be staring openly at eachother right now.
But I give you my sincere “mars fire extinguisher” wishes…
Gatubela, as you have noticed, I paint the blank canvas with broad brush strokes.
Here you said…
… “two people who love eachother independently, have a much stronger connection. Or rather, they become the channel to something greater than themselves…”
YES! — > something much greater than….. themselves. Precisely.
How many couples have you known (including your own relations) or seen, where a power much greater than themselves had a hold of the relationship?… it is a feeling of exquisite beauty to understand and to experience. It is a merging of powerful souls to the completion of One.
From another broad brush stroke… It is the toxicity of Man, his ego and intentions, which poisons the innate love energy of women. The Yin nature, just knows her complex inner-realms much clearer than a man knows his inner-truths. Which is why we can acknowledge that women, children and babies are connected soulfully to the vast richness of this earth and it’s bountiful nature.
Women just know that aggression (conquest) without a soulful Purpose or Direction is absolutely harmful and abusive toward the mother-earth love energy. Yet women still subconciously stay with their male if this behavior is apparent. They hang on to false-love, which digs deeper holes of fear and mistrust in the union.
I’ve been staring at you from day one Gatubela. Don’t blush now. Words and perspectives have a face too ya know.
I’ve been staring at you from day one Gatubela. Don’t blush now. Words and perspectives have a face too ya know.
Well, you have my attention now.
I guess I will be openly staring back at you as well. I have been hiding a bit…So what colour are my panties?
Phhhhtttt!
Scorpio certainly can make you feel like this…
She loves him…but does not contain him.
El hombre que yo amo tiene– The man I love has (is)
algo de nino– a bit of a child
la sonrisa ancha, tierna la mirada– a wide smile, a tender gaze (look)
tiene la palabra de mil hombres juntos– he has the word (honor/trust) of a thousand men altogether
y es mi loco amante, sabio, inteligente.– and is my wild (crazy) lover, wise, intelligent
El hombre que yo amo– The man I love
no le teme a nada– fears nothing
pero cuando ama lo– but when he loves, he
estremece todo.– shakes everything up
guerrero incasable en busca de aventuras– tireless warrior, in search of adventures
tiene manos fuertes calidas y puras.– he has strong, warm and pure hands
El hombre que yo amo– the man I love
sabe que lo amo– knows I love him
me toma en sus brazos– he takes me in his arms
y lo olvido todo;– and I forget everything
l es mi motivo– he is my reason (motive)
es mi propio sol– he’s my very sun
el me da alegrias que nadie me dio– he gives me joys that no one ever did
El hombre que yo amo sabe que lo amo,– the man I love knows that I love him
y vuela siempre lejos,– and [he] always flies far away
pero vuelve al nido,– but returns to the nest
El hombre que yo amo– the man I love
sabe que lo amo– knows I love him
yo lo quiero loco– I want him crazy
pero loco mio– but mine
El hombre que yo amo– the man I love
siempre sabe todo,– always knows everything
no sabe de enojos, no entiende rencores.– he doesn’t know anger, doesn’t understand resentment
el arregla todo con sabidura– he fixes everything with wisdom
con solo mirarme me alegra la vida– just by looking at me he brings joy to my life
El hombre que yo amo– the man I love
navega en mi mente,– navigates my mind
es mi unico idolo entre tanta gente,– he’s my only idol among so many people
El hace una fiesta con mi pelo suelto,- he has a party with my hair [when it’s] down
ladron de mis sueos– thief of my dreams
dueno de de mi almohada– owner of my pillow
A song that for symbolizes scorpionic energy and the heaven that goes away…when they do.
(feelng passionate lately…)
One love,
one love I Lived,
Crying
It told me,
the word of God,
Crying for you,
its is with love,
one love, one love I lived,
crying, and tormented,
the word of god,
crying for you,
it is with love, …
oh to (now) live with (near) you,
I fell in love with you,
without your kisses
I cannot live remembering, (I cannot live just remembering your kisses), ..
I wish,
to understand one love
and would like to know if it loved me ( too )
and (felt just as) tormented,
…the word of god,
Love doesn’t have to ‘be’ heavy melancholy either.
Joy should take Sovereignty. Always. Still… without that flame of real passion pulsing through the veins (the personal-reality)… many days, months and years of pensiveness and drudgery become building blocks, then big walls, fortifying any further soulful, fearless expression.
We can thank deadening daily routine, frantic schedules, mind-numbing rituals and zippy sub-concious personal habits for those pensive blockages.
Click here:
C:\Users\Pluto11\Desktop\Desktop\smiles.jpg
Bunnies. The Love Energy. Persephone. Soak in the delightful feminine flavors of women and the freedom of Play and Celebration that they bring into our masculine lives. Mouth-watering creatures.
Hi P.Puppy,
I clicked….and nothing happened.
Persephone plays once there is balance. It is like coming home and resting, at last.
That is where the freedom comes – feeling masculine life through our core being.
…and I am sure that most women would agree that this is what makes Scorpio rather mouth watering too 😉
….and her strong desire to celebrate, is the reason why she needs to be free. She does accept limitting her play and celebration under Hades´ ample oversoul coupled with dark, watchful “supervision”, due to the fact that she has surrendered to his (eternal and soulful) life force.
Playtime stops as soon as she get that “gaze” however.
hmmmmmmm…that was the reason why the frolicking started in the first place.
“…under Hades’ ample oversoul coupled with dark, watchful “supervision…”
It’s funny you said that, because through my experiences with women, a majority of Air (Intellect, social ability) and Fire (Feeling, intuitive, creative) natures within playful, bubbly women, have recieved that intensity of male Scorpionic gaze as being “toooo intense and uncomfortable”. LoL.
When women feel that they are intimidated by a male’s mind energy, presence, sensuality, looks, strength and sex appeal… they freeze-up. LoL. Their carefree ‘play’ turns into “Wooooo??”. Because if a woman is decently attractive or beautiful she has been very accustomed to projecting those feminine powers of attraction onto the inward attachments of unsure, glib, predictable and unskilled males. She then knows she can take control, whether she understands it or not.
Her reality shifts drastically from being worshipped, coddled and chased by indifferent, overly accomodating “nice” males… to feeling like a lost little damsel who wilts under the spell of a magnetic, dangerous force, such as a Scorpionic type male. I see these shifts of energy in women all the time around me. And during which, I’m only being the non-glib me.
Frolicking with a Hades heart and soul isn’t quite the same as frolicking in the surface muck of mundane cultural frivolities.
Btw, the click link didn’t work. It was a picture of three naturally beautiful women smiling with their supple cheeks touching one another.
Hi P.Puppy,
It is the exact opposite.
Ohhhhh….”intimidate me”… so that I can melt (not freeze) into “LIFE”… “Feeling safe” is soulfully felt as balance.
Carefree? I beg to differ. Through its opposite (intensity)…a woman can REALLY appreciate and FEEL “male’s SOULFUL (very important) mind energy, presence, sensuality, looks, strength and sex appeal”..through her core being.
Those “scorpionic gazes” are the most effective way to feel this energy…and that is why she “plays” with his “oversoul´s” loving boundries….which in Scorpio are fluidly fixed based on his TRUST.
For me, this is why (soulful) love is a filter…
So…just see Mr. Scorpio´s reaction, when those boundries are “tweaked”…just an itty bitty. All obstacles (heaven and hell, physical and metaphysical) are quickly (and I mean “QUICKLY”) “crushed”…while he “tests” her love for him.
That “un-glibness” gets “eagle-lasered” onto……her, while she openly gazes back, and “feels” the life in him.
And everything is well in their universes.
It is not done with the intention of taking control…it is mutual surrender.
I must add that…
When I say… “She then knows she can take control..”
This means, through my experience, I have felt a subconcious, pervasive paradigm through the collective feminine love-energy which radiates this way in order… “to feel safe”… before procedeeing with her guy of particular interest. So knowing she has found sound predictability and a superficial connection with a mate invokes a feeling of safety bliss for almost every woman seeking a nice guy.
Not true?
Find me, show me… a woman who says that she “enjoys” feeling uncomfortable in the presence of an unpredictable, genuine, charismatic man??
Now onward with my intial point: What exactly is a woman proceeding towards??
She is proceeding towards “Changing him”… ever so slowly, shaping him the way she wants to be treated. She is proceeding towards “instilling the need to be needed”. She is subconciously enabling dependency in the guy and the relationship, such as: puppy (non-conflicting) love, unreliable-friendship, smothering nurturing, and a zesty sexual desirability so as “he won’t stray”. In good time, her inner projections and identifications “to change him” eventually backfire and damage her as she has never really, truthfully, known nor understood his inner-weaknesses and lack of bravery to do something about them. The male returns his impotent energy back in and onto her, enabling a messy, petty, meaningless game of co-dependency relating between them, primarily thought to be… “in love”.
When the illusions of not being able to change her current or past male lovers into her life-long dream partner hits home… the little stinker goes looking for another guy of very similar psycho-sexual-emotional temperament, in blind hopes to change and manipulate that guy into something he’s really not.
Once again, my overall feeling of these above dynamics is not pointing the blame on women. It is the futile, weak and stagnant energy of men who block development. A man “is supposed” to assist his woman grow (change or evolve) through loving acts and being present, always in her energy, no matter how crancky, no matter how insecure she’s feeling, no matter how much of a professional nag bag she is… he must still be a rock solid influence, a loving force of consciousness and direction through all challenges and tests presented by the woman AND WORLD. Unfortunately, a man who is not superior fails miserably to logical hopes he can fix her own huffs and puffs. If this were possible, if she could actually fix her own moods… why in the hell would she be involved in a committed relationship with the guy in the first place?!
“If this were possible, if she could actually fix her own moods… why in the hell would she be involved in a committed relationship with the guy in the first place?!”
Uhhhhhh….hmmmmmm. Real toughie. Could be….
To feel him, assure that he feels her, so that they can surrender completely and utterly though soulful connection, (filter out the meanieness), empower the feeling of love and life thus giving way to the possibility of creating (or destroying) with a mutual higher purpose, under God´s Guidance.
“in blind hopes to change and manipulate that guy into something he’s really not.”
Actually, the idea is to empower him into who he realy “IS”…
So sue me!
“A man “is supposed” to assist his woman grow (change or evolve) through loving acts and being present, always in her energy,”
The woman must also be present in his energy, and do the same back. Scorpio´s beauty really shines in this dynamic. Maybe, there are very few women who energetically have what it takes in order to deal with Mr. Scorpio´s all knowing, soulful x-ray / PET scan, multi-dimensional, seen and unseen, infra and intra-world intensity…coupled with inner passion and outer coldness.
But the sensation of him being in love, is indicated by how she makes him feel through a dynamic of “feeling safe in being able to trust”. Not an easy feat, as he does not trust anybody. So he can superiorly battle her obstacles and professional nagging, but no one can battle his innate distrust 😉 Boo!
The creative dynamic, (not illusionary) through mutual surrender, becomes empowered and has a life force of its own. Therefore, there can be no co-dependancy.
So what evolved Scorpio REEEEAAAAALLLLLYYYYY wants, is someone who is present in his energy too.
Yeah that is specifically you Gatubela, you’ve always felt my energy field and understood it superbly. But I’m talking about the real world out there. The real and fearful dysfunctions of human relating and mating. Your fine understanding of my occult visions exist nicely on the same frequency.
What about the zillions of scrambled, elusive frequencies of the real world? The Maya of the real world? What are you and I supposed to make of this existential gap?
“…Actually, the idea is to empower him into who he realy “IS”…So sue me!..”
Bella. Try this.
Ask… fifty thousand random people male and female this question:
“What do you think or feel, ‘is the meaning’ of your entire existence?”
Give them a full day to think about it and have them write down their answers.
Using the gifts of our particular intuitve life experiences… do you honestly believe that even 5% of those fifty thousand people would have a clue for their purpose here on earth. Would they deeply know their reason for existing? For being born?
I feel… No. They simply couldn’t answer it from a holistic and intimately personal psychology. WHY?… Because we are all born on different paths. The unfolding Truth of my personal path, is that I now see I was born as a – Seeker. An Adventurer of mind, heart and spirit through first hand life experience.
So in response to your above view that women are to “Empower” a male into his highest potential… this can only be possible if the male himself clearly knows his existential purpose for being, BEFORE that potential or empowerment can be fulfilled. A guy living each day in this life as a dead-weight inside, in a world full of self-loathing societies and limitation, does not mean the love and wisdom of a woman would empower that guy to evolve. He must ‘be’ his own course of purpose before the woman creates a pseudo course for him and their relationship.
i think that this life is just full of flux.. and yes we are all on our own paths.. there is the notion of impermanence.. and yes those who understand scorpionic energies will feel it in their gut. and you do pluto puppy. and you do Gatubela. so this thing of getting to “somewhere” is illusion because nothing stays the same in life.
a women wanting a man to be empowered is just i feel illusion as well. it is just her own projection of some ideal onto him in a way to control or stuff down her fears that she can lose herself. the fighting feeling to hold onto oneself is just not surrendering to the power of what is happening between you, beyond self beyond ego. it is at that point one can feel death, birth, and love.
what goes around comes around. that just popped into my head.
trust. its a biggie. but its so damn annoying..if there was never that word in the first place there wouldnt be such an issue maybe. seems to have become almost a squashed up idea, in a kind of box.like so many other things that i hear people talk about. like there is a set code of being, relating. when someone says they dont trust- what do they really not trust? what is it exactly and where is it coming from? its like it is said now as a way out of feeling anything.then comes the thing about measure and how everything is then measured according to everything else.. its like a rehash of life. nothing new. is that just the extreme block in energy flow?
us… then me .. then the world… who wants to fight the world/ it is a dog eat dog world. its so scary and stupid sometimes out there that all i want to do is be in bed.find a nice fluffy safe spot in my bed and listen to the birds and eat custard.
wow .. my neighbour is throwing things out of his house yelling to himself.i think he has been evicted.
first time ive heard him mad.
think im a seeker/adventurer too..
“…if she could actually fix her own moods… why in the hell would she be involved in a committed relationship with the guy in the first place?!”
Ahhh, upon further thought of my own questions… I know a few reasons.
* She is in it for financial security.
* She is in it for not being single.
* She is in it for social status and social postioning.
* She is in it to act like she is in love and the excitement of new discovery.
Forget about eternal love…. What’s that !?! LoL.
Life is not about knowing the right answers. Life is about asking the right Questions.
Drone conventional logic, fearful thinking… isn’t even aware that greater questions exist.:)
Pluto Puppy & Gabriella you just ruined this thing for everyone else. What in the world is all of this crap?
Hi Lori,
Since you have “zinged” in on me and P.Puppy, I would have to ask for more clarification.
The “crap” between me and him, or the “crap” discussed in this forum?
I saw your previous post responding to Nancy, which clearly asserted your incredible independence and strength of character with regards to what you seem to perceive as Scorpionic “not going to call you” tendencies.
My experiences with Truth arrow shooting Sag, have given me a bit of ouchie. However, attempting to understand the spirit of your post correctly, if I was being (unsoulfully) dealt with, I would probably not want to make Mr. Scorpio my primery love interest either.
But you have taken the time to read the whole forum (thank you) and formulate an opinion laced with your personal “crap” i.e….scorn and intolerance, using (and therefore deeming that) the “collective unknown contributors are unable to speak for themselves” as your supposed justification.
But I do not see what that has to do with me and P.Puppy.
But it sure feels crappy to be crapped on by crappyness.
Crap.
What would you like to really say Lori?
The forum is open to you as it is for every person. In case you were wondering, nothing and no-one is stopping you from speaking out. Only you. Now tell me what you really think. I know there’s more views from you then a statement about what is crap and what is not crap.
“Ruined this thing for everyone elso”? hahaha. Okay .What do you want to talk about so everyone can un-ruin this thing for you and everyone you speak for?
Please share. I’m sure it won’t be crap.
Hi Umm,
In my experiences, you are right. It can be illusion.
The reason lies fundamentally in the concept of what you said about trust. That this word should not exist. So why does it?
There is something unstable about “this world”…and it is energetic.
We would have to opt for a state of being that is absolutely stable.
But every man has a “seed”, even if it is self-serving and destructive. The greatest illusion for men and women, is that they think they did it by themselves. Together, we are “more”, if we permit this “comunal” state of Being.
Battling the world? My blood boils from what I feel in this world. It is starting to feel like being unsafe, is the only way to “be safe”…
Meaning, based on my rather strong life circumstances, me being calm about it, was perpetuating the illusion.
Creation….We recoil from our own ignorance (partial knowledge of the unknown) with polarity, fear and separation. So we manifest this dynamic in this physical world.
But if we look at it with the concept that you indicated about the word trust not existing…There is no illusion in this “creation”. It only reflects “who we collectively are”…and “what we have collectively empowered”…
Feminine and masculine, exists in both men and women. So I was not actually putting the empowerment onus on the female sex. However, when a man and a woman get together, with Scorpio, he is the masculine, with strong dark undercurrents (intense), and she is the feminine, with strong white (carefree) undercurrents.
yes..true..they think they did it by themselves. thats the disconnectedness that permeates everything.thats where things shrink and become boxed and stupidity thrives, and competition emerges big time along with massive power games, ego battles and its then all a race to just survive in a crazy world.
battling takes energy. sometimes alot of energy. and it really can just be so farcical when you stand back and look at it all and the bigger picture. stand back and look up at the stars and think about it.
i mean, even illusion is illusion etc. it all becomes nothing. and everything. and thats IT.
“creation”.”who we collectively are” “who we have collectively empowered”. yes this is something that is done naturally. natural selection?evolution? so why are there so many idiots in this world.. people who are so cut off from love from truth from themselves. what i want to know is where did it all start? I mean all this thirst for power in men? in humans.. where did the battle begin? where did the breakdown and fear of the unknown start to manifest??????
“…I mean all this thirst for power in men? in humans.. where did the battle begin? where did the breakdown and fear of the unknown start to manifest??????..”
Hey Ummm,
When you observe animals of all species, insects, reptiles… all ‘ground dwelling’ creatures…what do they all have in common? Each creature of the earth environment literally ‘looks Down’ directly at the ground foraging for their food, water and shelter.
Well…….
…. Evolutionarily speaking and metaphorically speaking… men are just the same. Men hunt to survive just as the animals need to. Men thirst for SURVIVAL just as the animals must do. Men fight and compete with other men just as two alpha-male animals within the same species fight, in order to remind every other animal in that family/species who is the King-Pin. Men… the masculine energy, is literally the stamp of Aggression. Not Love. I’m talking the energy of aggression. Intiative. Desire. So with this very competitive and primative human environment, just like the vast animal kingdom… the creation of man’s ego reality to accumulate more and more, to kill more (in the business sense and game playing psychological sense) is the natural motivation for conquest or “success” to the masculine core.
The problem though… is with this dog-eat-dog civil reality to survive, the primative masculine core only knows how to hunt, to accumulate money/things/people and to control the fate of any unconscious and weak human beings via many different sectors of life through our society. Masculine egoical, insensitive energy uses these competitive drives to wipe-out any opposing threat as to empower THEIR SELF-SERVING PLANS… which produces:
Fearful energy in others who also need to survive. Which means Unethical behaviors and deceptions (mind tricks) over others who are fearful of being fired, rejected, abused. Which means Irresponsible use of power or position in which abusive expression, agendas and tactics yeild more fear and distress in people aiding their ‘Self-Serving interest.’ Which means a Collective Manifestation of man’s egotistical yearnings to avoid, deny his “true-self”. Most people, especially males… are living a complete lie. That’s a brazen comment right? Well it’s real. Now a man who is blinded by his ego-approval and has no idea of Empathy toward other people… does not acknowledge himself as “a liar”. Why would he admit disturbed responsibility?? He thinks honesty would result in lack of power. LoL Obviously that admission of self would jeopardize their control over you and others!!
Men “believe” in the truth of their lies. No joke. This fundamental lack of humanity, humility and the obsessive need to serve their egoical dreams of who they “think” they are, is why the toxicity of man in this world will never cease. This is where Impeccable Integrity felt and demonstrated in a solid character is not a noun. Like all other virtues, heart-felt integrity and honor, not for ones-ego-self, but for ones Greater-Self… sadly does not sell for much in “this game” playing joke of soulless life-poker today. The Lower-self (dog-eat-dog) in man is here forever.
Hypothetically:
If all men, if every single man functioned from their Highest and Best Self all the time, lived completley in the moment and surrendered to the Omni-power of God/Love… we would not have the mindless, soulless acts of cruelty, greed and insidious abuse we know all too well in our environments today.
Man and his Shadow eventually meet the Maker. Where his soul eventually travels is his decision only. The power of choice is are not words.
…And for thousands of years… men use women as pawns, or sex-objects to get what they want over the competing ego poison of other men. Aka prostitution, social and relational enslavement of women. It’s all a game, remember that people? The power of the divine feminine, is so intoxicating, so alluring and stimulating for the insensitive, ego-blind males… they accumulate tons of money and nice things just to own the mere presence of supple women. What weakness. Amazing. If that reality is soulful, faithful, dignified heart intelligence… if that is real empathy for human beings… then I must be on crack.
Lastly… “the masculine” energy exists in every woman on the planet. Just as the feminine resides in all men to various degrees. Some women are actually more masculine in their aggression, assertiveness and decision making capabilities than many men. I would guess that maybe 10% of all women on earth breathe a masculine assertion, puffy-ego and planned decisiveness. The female ball-busters out there… who in my experience… are genuinely soft and sweet women inside like their girly-swirl sisters. The thing is, it just takes longer to break down their egoical billboards and roughness than it does with the delicious bunnies.
“the creation of man’s ego reality to accumulate more and more, to kill more..”, yeah but why did that come about? do you know what i mean? like i understand about survival and the hunting and king pin and every animal is that pretty much, to survive we must kill. But that is one thing and greed is another. the more and more..whats with that? animals arent particularly greedy are they. they take what they need to survive and thats it. its almost paradoxical like whoever decided they were going to invent a cure for a certain disease that would save a million lives was also theoretically killing them in the long term.overpopulation that has limited natural resources but the hunter instinct is still there. and shows its colours in the ways you described masculine insensitive egoistical drives, with what return?? bubkis. hence the search for more and more.. to fill the void that is unfillable.
so was there some plan… ok lets wipe out the earth..dominate animals and think of ourselves superior.lets invent the notion of love and breed until we cant breed anymore, until we have reached a point whereby we have so much “power” we dont know what to do with it anymore.oops feeling a bit disconnected? well lets make sure we all “think” we are via technological advancement-smart phones,facetalk (whats next fanny talk? ha),scanners and microchips with the “latest” in whatever.notice how many people blab on about their new toy, like walking advertisements.boring as batshit. everybody trying to outglamour everybody else. and this is the kind of survival we are in? they going to invent edible phones?send in the clones? hit eject when the shit really hits the fan?who was it that said- hmm not sure about all this unknown stuff…think we need to be concerned..be afraid. fear for our greater good?
“…the creation of man’s ego reality to accumulate more and more, to kill more, yeah but why did that come about? do you know what i mean?”
* Men have an ancient ‘nature’. Ego is man’s myth. Ego is separate from God. Ego does not die, nor does it suffer intensely, then surrender under the Higher Powers of the Shadow universe. Ego is blinded from Truth. ANIMALS however… are not greedy because they instinctively know the rhythms of life and death, the cycles of the seasons, and the natural food-chain or hierarchy relative to all the other animals “existing” on Mother Earth, and they know the electro-magnetic field of Father Time by “simply being” under the radiance of God (Apollo) … and the great blue sky.
* Women have an ancient ‘nature’. Ego is inherited or adopted from man’s creative myth and then a separation from Shiva (Destruction) forms. The Love energy innately pumping through every woman’s core being is also blinded, raped, and enslaved by man’s toxic myths. Love is transmitted through the ego today, but not of the ancient heart and soul.
Both men and women share an ancient Unisex ‘nature.’
Onward to your next question:
“… like i understand about survival and the hunting and king pin and every animal is that pretty much, to survive we must kill. But that is one thing and greed is another. the more and more..whats with that?..”
Greed separates human beings from the animals. Human beings manifest exorbitancy stemming from Self-Interest. This greed rules mankind. Pure indulgence, self-gratification, creation stations-conglomerates, instant-gratification and enormous waste are parisitic to Mother Earth. Man’s exorbitancy destroy the “rules of living” the “ancient beingness” of humans once had. Greed is the by-product of Ego. So is Abusive Power. Nothing more. This is why animals in the wild do not know Ego. Once again, ego is man’s manifested myth. Man’s creation is to dominate other human beings, and to conquer other God-given resources. That my darling is Loveless reality. All Animals are oblivious to human Ego. WHY?… Because their “Nature” simply knows that ego is not REAL… Ya see??
Your next question:
Hahaha, love your passion.
“… whereby we have so much “power” we dont know what to do with it anymore.oops feeling a bit disconnected? well lets make sure we all “think” we are via technological advancement-smart phones,facetalk (whats next fanny talk? ha),scanners and microchips with the “latest” in whatever.notice how many people blab on about their new toy, like walking advertisements.boring as batshit…”
Your expression here is why I mentioned in an older post that with all of this technological advancement, and as brilliant as the human brain is creating tremendous change for our daily living standards…. I feel that we are doomed as a species when it’s all said and done. If our natural food and fresh water supply runs-out, to feed… say 12 billion people in the future (next 200 years or so) … wide-spread famine and disease will wipe us out. If that doesn’t wipe us out, chaos will, anarchy will breed and abusive calculations of technology to conquer the civil rights of others… such as nuclear war… or even a cataclysmic explosion will prevail. The Earth itself? How will it fair? Old Mother Earth will be just fine without humans here as she always has been for the previous 80 billion years.
Final question:
“…think we need to be concerned..be afraid. fear for our greater good?..”
Baby… Fear not. We are all destined for death sometime. Worry is a waste of energy little Virgo. Live without fear and worry. Live your life today, in the moment of every bright day as if it were your last. Scorpionic intensity understands this occult truth better then anyone. Your Scorpio Moon has found my deep love for you Umm.
“… everybody trying to outglamour everybody else…”
Bahahaha!!
Cute.
yup animals know ego is not real. it doesnt exist.
in the ancient natures of men and women..yes, its primal, and without ego. but when did ego get born? what was that point? and for what. really for what.greed.. for what? suicide?
I love your passion too Pluto , always have. and you have my deep love too.
x
talking about animals.. tonight somebody dumped a black dog outside my house. and it came bounding to my front door.it went sniffing in the garden hung around for a while and then disappeared. i thought about giving it a bath.
im in bed going to sleep soon Pluto..goodnite sweet dreams x
Hi P.Puppy,
You will be more than a seeker…because when masculine and feminine energies combine, there will come out a third “reason” for being born.
Hi Umm and P.Puppy,
For me, there are some people who have “made a difference” in this world. Or rather…the representation of energy manifested in one person made a ripple in the huge ocean.
How did they do that?
What REALLY was going on, during their stay on this earth?
Our description of what Jesus was REALLY doing, probably is very erroneous. I wonder, based on the reversal energies.
Or rather…he was doing one thing , and the”behind the scenes” divine feminine was energetically doing the oppsosite, upon the minds of “men”.
Balance….
Oh for sure, people have certainly made a huge difference and people are still making ripples of differences right now.
These questions remain:
1) Are these collective differences conscious of the ultimate consequences upon humanity?
2) Does the reality of these differences lead the human race in a healthy, life-affirming direction?
3) Is this evident direction right now HUMANE and LOVING?
I feel it is not. The Universal Soul of people is fading. Tech machines and software and relational artificiality rules supreme. Heck… people “think” that technological brillance is to be “evolved” and up to speed with the “trends” and “current markets”. LoL.
“…Our description of what Jesus was REALLY doing, probably is very erroneous…”
Well through the frequency of my soul-reality… the Christ Consciousness certainly “Knew” his multi-leveled existence of mind, body and soul. He (the bearded guy) knew “Death of the Ego” and the ultimate “Resurrection of a Higher-Being” via the virtues of immense pain and suffering.
He was quoted saying something while he was in the state of being tortured, beaten, urinated on, spat on, humiliated and indignified, plus they made a halo of sharpe-razor thorns, put in on his head…then plunged huge rusty nails into his hands and feet by the Imperialist regime. The POLITICIANS is what they were… with Self-Serving ego-infatuations doing what they do.
Politicians…the game of politics is everywhere among us socially today. We don’t have to crucify people today and humiliate them for applause and fear… we can and do simply control them through manipulative coercion, like making the rules up as you go… if the rules aren’t working in your self-centered favor.. then well, hey, the rules need to change. These pathetic personality tricks and emotional controls of what you can say and cannot say exist right now in your life. Of what you can do and cannot do. Gotta love the hampster wheel of fear instilled via the baseless politics of daily living. Not what I would call…. freedom.
During his torture and inhumane experiences, Christ said something like:
“They know not what they do”.
He was dead-on. That expression from soul is an immortal statement.
That message gives me goose-bumps for the souls who understand the profound meaning felt in our existence, the riddle of meaning within us.
So yes Bella, today’s collective personality babble-bubble and blindness reads passages from the Christ consciousness, try’s to incorporate in their bubble lives.. BUT… whether those followers have actually “Freed themselves of Fear and self-loathing” by virtue of first hand life experience is another matter.
hey Gatubela,
“how did they do that?” – perhaps by being completely true to love and to a higher conscience, something greater than themselves.understanding at a deep level the connection between everything and nothing.freed of ego. yeh be interesting to sit down and have a good ol chat with jesus. wonder if he likes camembert and crackers? what do you think the divine feminine was doing on the minds of men?what was the one thing you think jesus was doing?
Hi Umm,
Based on my very limitted understanding…
He could have activated cosmic law…and the fragments of his gospel that are available, give us a bit of an idea of how it was done.
They knew not what they did…but perhaps not because of what was going to happen to him…but to them.
“… but when did ego get born? what was that point? and for what. really for what.greed.. for what? suicide?…”
Dating way back, the Pharaohs of Ancient Egypt, 2560 BC, built The Great Pyramids. Their immaculate visions and motivations to pull off such an engineering miracle… does suggest some of the earliest evidence of the manifestion of human Ego. Ancient China has similar evidence, that of spiritual worship in their architecture aslo.
However…
Those great kings, those great minds (of men) who orchestrated the reality of those engineering marvels, had deep within their Soul, an intrinsic motivation quite different from the ego motivations and manifestations of men today.
The Pharaohs built Pyramids. What are Pyramids? They’re not Banks or Brothels or Casinos or Mega-Hotels or Media Empires or Corporations or Super-Malls. They are Tombs. They are Grave Houses in Reverence for the Dead. Death was spiritually revered and welcomed back then. It was not Feared, as it is feared in the illusory and distorted lives of people today.The ancients, all across the world during that period had Spiritual Ego’s/Enlightenment to honor the presence of God felt within their daily-‘Existence’.
Sure… the Kings ate yummy grub like a Kings does… the middle-class worked very hard like the middle-class do today, the peasants ate like poor peasants do today… but the visionaries of that time… were not in it to– “Market Thy-Self”. They did not build the Pyramids for instant indulgences or for sex symbol gratification by the masses. Do ya see the distinction of motivation?? Do you see how we have evolved… or more like… ‘Devolved’ the last 4500 years? Take a look at Las Vegas Nevada. LoL!
yes, so it wasn’t so long ago then.the pyramids.. housing the dead,mm and our equivalent-a bank-thats the thing, this civilization is trying to ridiculously prolong life instead of revering and honoring death. the balance is out of kilter, we want to live forever, and with medicinal cures for this and cures for that, people are living longer-what are we ultimately aiming for? a universe where only humans exist and never die?………
“devolved” -yep.ha its like a battle now to keep human dying! shit my head just did a 360.
“were not in it to market thyself” -exactly. thats the huge difference. there was an understanding, wordless and undenying of the collective. but.. what happened to that? did a man look up at the pyramids while it was being built and said-“that couldve been a penis but its pointy”, or “i wish i could’ve built that”, or “if i stood at the top then they wouldnt be able to get me”, or “gee that would be a good place to hide some treasures”…or” that pyramid makes me feel attractive”,or “hmm that pyramid is me! i’m bigger and stronger than everyone!”
“..this civilization is trying to ridiculously prolong life instead of revering and honoring death..”
Yes, great understanding. The evidence of this de-volution all point back to the one fear of mortality. The fear of a meaningless existence… so the science and technology of today and the future says… Hey, let’s create genetic mutations or stems cells or clones to extend “our phyiscal lives” another 50-100 years.
In the scheme of this Powerful Universe which is hundreds of billions of years old… isn’t it a little vain and disillusioned for science, for mankind “to believe” that living 250 years of age versus 93 years of age will provide a better, happier quality of life?? .. A weee bit missing the Truth.
The extra 157 years would certainly give us more time to accumulate toys, to have sex, to hoard money, to widget global friends and lovers. Would the Thi Powerful Universe, The Source feel that an extension of human life would affect the naturalness of Death?? LoL… The Source is giggling at the unfolding farce we strive to enlarge.
Naturalness. Simplicity of being. Where has it gone.
I really do wonder about all this..
“where has it gone” ..yeh.for me its a little place inside. when i am feeling peaceful. when i am in nature.when i am naked. when i am not afraid.
but when i turn on the tv. or am out on the street, or at the supermarket, things are different. so many choices..i feel bombarded. 30 different types of yoghurt.everybody running around accumulating.teeth whiteners,canned crap and blah blah blah.
yeh it is VAIN for mankind to think that living to 250 years old will provide a better happier life. but ..that wouldnt end there.. i mean why would it? the unfillable hole.. why would it stop at 250? get to 250 hey lets just double it .. hey why stop at all? and perhaps that will be the end. and no end. if there is no more death then that erases the fear of death.don’t have to deal with it then hey.eternal life. and the madness is that most people dont see what is happening.. not really. they have utter blindness and disrespect for what keeps them alive. I have been in the ocean alot and have been close to drowning. held and churned deep under the water while 8ft waves break above me.we humans think we are more powerful than nature but we are not. we never will be. EVER.END OF STORY.we can build robots and bombs and skyscrapers and jets, ipads and ipods and “smart” whatever.. but it will not save this earth.
time to put the brakes on. seriously.boycott the bullshit. how many people out there seriously want to live in a humidicrib?
“… if there is no more death then that erases the fear of death.don’t have to deal with it then hey.eternal life..”
No death ever??…. No such thing. That’s a whimsical fantasy.
Death is God-natural energy. Omni-present forces in you and a little baby. The “nature of death” is unstoppable energy. Fear eternally exists, because the spiritual lessons in human ‘life’ (our existence) are to teach us to overcome fear, until we are completely free. It is impossible to free ourselves if the ego-personality does not know Truth. This I mean…the Truth and Transformation of……….. Death.
Galaxies die. Peaches die. Relationships die. T.V shows die. Jobs die. Dreams die. Sperm die. Concrete and glass structures die. Scorpions die. Our pets die. The Car Dies. Flowers die. We die.
So how do we want to die? The feeling of peace, contentment, love and light?… or the inner plight of despair, fear, anxiety, confusion and regret?
I’d say the only thing that doesn’t die is… Honey? LoL… (someone please correct me if honey does go bad after 46 years or so in the cupboard).
“whimsical fantasy”.. yes thats exactly what some of the madness out there thrives on. i wholeheartedly know death. well i know that everything dies, like you said. mmm .. we all die. every single thing. Honey? well i have seen old jars and they solidify. go to candy. so yes i think they die.plus others get ants in them, the ants drown eventually , in the honey . and then the honey dies. hehe.i think. do you think chairs die? and a table?
how come you have 46 year old honey in your cupboard?
“galaxies die, peaches die” …you make death sound so sexy. sorry i couldnt help it 😉
“..do you think chairs die? and a table?…”
Yes they die, especially when fatty people situate on them.
So everything in the physical realm (the tangible) dies. Does our Soul live on eternally?… In my heart, yes I feel it does. Our Soul is ordained into another “physical human existence” …or life… after… we die in this physical body.
6 years ago, I would not have said anything like I have been saying to you guys here. In 2006… I was a lost, confused, self-destructive human being. In fact… in my entire life thru 2006… I was a resentful, angry, Non-Believer of anything and everyone that I couldn’t understand or prove with my five senses. I was a cynical, bitter Athiest in many respects. I would lash out to anything or anyone who claimed to live “in Faith” of any kind.
For my personally unavoidable passage through Darkness for many years (32 years) was a harsh disputer of why or how anyone could be happy in their lives. During those years I was oblivious to all types of realities, especially the reality within myself. I hadnot asked one question, nor did I seek and read one book cover-to-cover in adulthood. My pain and vices controlled me full throttle. A voice then whispered within me, repeatedly stating “Go and find out what all of this means”. Angels are real people. They are real for specific Souls who were born “to Hear and Feel” them.
No Umm, I didn’t know the life-span of honey… thanks for clearing that up. And yup, death is sexy sex. That’s why the orgasm is “the little death.”
Let us not forget that death simply means– ‘Change’… or ‘to Transform’ into another state of beingness. So beingness is a mind/heart presence in the moment, every breathing moment, which feeeeeels life ‘under’ the quacky noise, escapes and projected crap of the greedy personality.
lol. yes fatty people killing chairs.all fat people should go to calcutta get a wake up call.
ooh you know “the little death”! le petit mort. mm..
so you are 37 now?you know i think things turned around for me at around the same time..maybe a bit earlier,early 2000’s( ha thats weird to write-like 2001 space odyssey) but thereabouts.i was on a pretty destructive path, consumed by self loathing and shame and anger.yeh cynical and boxed up and separated and stagnant. but in all honesty my life has been a series of spiritual challenges really and i know its not over yet. so .. you said that you used to be athiest.. are you following a religion now?
i think honey can die at different times depending on enviromental factors. depends where the honey is….. yours sounds like it is still going strong?
“.. so .. you said that you used to be athiest.. are you following a religion now?…”
No no no. Not “a religion” or dogma or doctrine from “a book”. No. Faaar more to the tone of:
Raw Life Experiences combined with Mystical, Occult Knowledge.
I’ve been saying all along that… God is you— deep down there somwhere, God is me. People fail “to find” that deeper Truth of Ancient-Self… because FEAR is the Captain of almost every persons life. Consequential Unconscious fear. Consequential Subconscious fear.
If we are NOT AWAKE… fear… is the captain of your/our fate. It’s really that simple.
“…are you following a religion now?..”
Yes bunny. You have been reading it, right now. Pay attention. LoL.
haha. bunny?? lol.my name’s umm. yes yes.. was just double checking thats all.it was just after you said “athiest” that i thought somethng.. and it was like maybe you had a name for your own thing…some other ism. but you dont and im glad. its more pure. i get you , dont worry.it was a slip down the dip. im n the sand now, wanna come and make a tree with me? after i sent it i thought-nah.. its not him. you know what i mean. didnt mean to insult you. just had a mild panic hehe .
this is actually the official video of that song.. bit slow cos vevo and ads so i hit pause first to let it run through.
like the end.. i remember seeing that once in the sky, was a long time ago.
have a look at “guerrilla gardening”. its like plant graffiti.
There are certain plants that withstand the rather bad soil conditions, lack of water…and lack of care.
They don´t need too much sun…and can also withstand direct sun as well.
I have also thought that instead of flowers, herbs are also nice to have in the city.
Mint…rosemary…melissa…lavender is good for the lungs too…comfrey…
What about calendula? Good for fungal infections and ointments.
i love herbs, i grow them in my garden and cook with them alot.mm yummy smells.i think its a great idea planting herbs in the city. why not.the only thing is pollution but its better to have plants than no plants. calendula ointment , thats the marigold flowers right? and chickweed ointment good too. echinacea plants are really pretty and a good anti- viral, if you put the tiniest bit of the flowerhead on your tongue it will go numbish. melissa is a gorgeous one, lemon balmy.I love oils and smells. I have been burning oils of basil , peppermint, eucalyptus and lavender, and benzoin is nice.I cook with alot of herbs. A really delish soup is garlic( you can roast for good flavour or just pan fry) and leek and potato with thyme. yummo.
chamomile is a great one to have in the garden and smells beautiful. its a sunny day here im getting sick of being sick bleh! turns out its a virus. gotta get better so i can do some planting! have you ever made ointments Gatubela?
its funny how i was actually craving thyme when i ate soup with it in it was like yes thats what i needed. thyme i have just read is good for chest infections. i didnt know that. garlic. knew about that one.and apparently chickweed is good for reducing fever and phelgm associated with bronchitis. verrrrry interesting. hehe.
You don’t insult me Umm, because you’ve never tried playing games with me. So I know you well enough not to bother you while you walk around the house pasty naked. LoL.
It’s good that you get me Umm. I have the highest respect and love for you and Gatubela. Any woman’s physical appearance or cuteness is not as important to me now like is was in the past. Because I now “x-ray discern” everyones mind-set… still others would assess my direct zingers as “hurtful Judgments” with every person I interact with. I can’t please everyone. Life isn’t fair people. You understand my abstract points of view and art of living, as does Bella. Your openness is brave, mature and refreshing, which is rare. — Cheers.
Pasty? lol. no.. far from it. Naked maybe, but i have olive skin.
thanks for accepting me and allowing the space for me to be open.I love how open you are also.YOu are the refreshing one! i love your outlook and honesty, not something I come across much, if at all. x
i am a bit sick at the moment got a cough and feeling pretty crappy, feels like i cant breathe properly, i hate it.i hardly ever get sick.my head and cheekbones hurt.i will be ok though.maybe i will do a steam with eucalyptus.
Hi Umm,
I hope you get better…
Hmmmm…pranic breathing is excellent for brave women who go surfing in the cold ocean.
Lift your hands over your head. Breathe in, as much as you can. Hold it and count to 10. Then exhale all of it, and then some more. You may go into a coughing fit….and this is a good sign. It will let you know if you have mucus forming there…and of course, you will start getting it out. Be near the W.C…in case those boogers are something serious and give you the gag reflex.
The idea is to ventilate the lungs as much as possible and to get oxygen going their. Anaerobic conditions will lead to infections.
Stay warm…
thanks beautiful,
yeh its a yukky cough , dry and annoying. been doing the honey and lemon thing and steaming. the breathing thing is working a bit. i might have an allergy too i think its spring here.
…”You are mirroring myself’…
…”I don’t deserve this”…
Words from Mr Scorp….
How does it feel for a scorpio man to see from a woman that she can go her distance for her great love like he does? Why does it scares him to see that someone could be as passionate as him when in love? ;-(
Hi Lovemari…
He told you what he did not want…but did he also support you in this? It seems that he did not from your comments…
Are you willing to face a certain aspect of himself that he does not seem to like, In order to transform the dynamic between the two of you?
Looks like he is leaving you alone on this one…
Great love comes when a woman has surrendered to God (through the Divine Masculine)…NOT to Mr. Scorpio. It has to sing inside you.
It permits you to see his Divinity…
And that means that you can handle anything that comes your way.
Trust the dynamic to God through being grounded in your own very powerful energies.
In the end…what we all deserve the opportunity to face ourselves…it is a God given gift…
I guess he does not see it that way.
Ooopppsss
“In the end…what we all deserve the opportunity to face ourselves…it is a God given gift…”
What I wanted to say is that what we all deserve the opportunity to face ourselves…
Otherwise, I guess I would be under the impression that I am “perfect”.
These little “gems” need to surface up through the dynamic…which seems to be the ocean between the two of you.
Hi P.Puppy and Umm,
Looks like we need an energetic “Hadean nuclear explosion” on earth.
That would be an interesting “petit mort”….
*evil but soulful laugh*
Hey Umm…honey would also be good for your cold…with lemon and tea.
It is a bit heavy on the tummy though…
Lovemari,
Find out what he wants. Ask him without concern for rejection. Does he want to be exclusive with you or does he want to be free to roam around? You’re gonna have find the Truth. Honestly… if you can’t receive above-board answers… you’re dealing with a male Scorpio who is half-ass, ego-manipulative, and most of all … a guy controlled by the feelings of Underworld Fears about you, the relationship, and his inner-life.
If he is afraid of direct questions… then he’s afraid of the Truth of his fears. Afraid of facing the honesty between you. This energy I describe… is very similar in the way I talked to female Scorpio’s here on the forum in front everyone, ya see? If arguing “to be right” is more important than Truth, you’ll be digging yourself an illusion of lies in relating. You’ll have to “know” how far he is willing to walk…carefully… in appreciation and respect for shared brave honesty. Treat every interaction with him as you would holding-hands walking down an enormous flight of stairs. Every thing said, offered and acted on, has meaning. All of it, has meaning.
Knowing these meanings, means living in the moment of Truth.
Mari,
You’re not supposed to mirror anybody. You’re supposed to follow the Truth and Authenticity of your own happiness, expression and individuality. Trust your beating heart first. Because if you feel lack, then he will feel your lack and maybe he senses his life is fuller without you. You have to be emotionally prepared for that possibility.
So from your perspective… don’t go seeking a male Scorpio to complete you. You will have to be happy in solitude, in all aspects of living and death… without the approval of any guy to confirm “love” for you.
Much of his reactions will depend on your lack of self. Are you playing? Or are you BEING? If you are playing with the control buttons to make a relationship happen that is not True, then you will have to suffer the consequences of forcing that love and affection. Love is self-honest and detached from expectation Mari. Your experiences are lessons for growth.
and then I see my own mirror in him….
omg….. history repeats itself… but we are in reverse position…..
Hi Marrie…
Mirroring…
I have no words to express my feelings..
I wish the world will stop right now…
The mirror is killing me….
Looking at his perspective being at his place before I know that it is going to kill him if he is going to follow my path…
At his perspective following his path is the craziest thing and I could end up living in pain for rest of my life….
Pluto trine Venus:
What does it mean to your relationship when your natal Pluto is trine your partner’s Venus? He/she may want to have children. You feel a flow of passion, the intensity of which drives you to be with your romantic partner, make love, transform, heal, even possess your lover, and yet there’s something about all this powerful emotional experience which all feels very natural to you at the time. If your romantic partner’s Pluto is trine your Venus, he/she is very likely to view your as a soul mate, that one fated romantic love that will free him/her from the pain of loneliness or failed relationships. You seek to create transformation by burning away the past, going to extremes, and penetrating to the essence of physical and spiritual love.
…….Your experiences are lessons for growth……….
He have seen than I have grown. I found myself and he do not want me to loose it again that is why he cannot tell the truth straight right on my face. The truth was his unknown when he tried to get close to me… which is known to me. I knew it from the very start, one of the reason why I ran away…… as far as I could to avoid another disaster in my life. I guess my boundaries are weak he managed to enter into my heart. I fell in love…. it felt like he touches my soul….I healed from my past and purify myself to be worthy for his love… his life…
I found my inner freedom to love like there is no tomorrow. Throw all the consequences just to be with him. He saw himself…. His own mirror… he couldn’t believe it…. he said he don’t deserve it. I felt the guilt inside him because he doesn’t feel the same freedom anymore.
……..”We cannot control the people we meet” but we cannot choose whom we are going to be with”…….
For some reason I believed something has happened that made his unknown become something he cannot deny anymore. That it is impossible for us to be together. There are consequences…. heavier than what we have. I feel betrayed…. but I have only myself to blame. I love him too much to fall in anger.
He has to destroy whatever connection that we have for me to me to move on. Then I saw the mirror of my past….. killing his own desire in order not to destroy the other person. But am afraid…. because in my past I let go the one that I love and end up with a relationship without love… without passion….
I was miserable for years dreaming about my freedom. That the other person feel like he has been cheated because I cannot give my whole being. Like I do not have any option but to stay in the relationship because I owe him my life. I forced myself to love the person but end up he still left me. He gave my freedom the hard way. It took years and years for me to dealt with the side effects.
I know that there is nothing I can do about his choices… his own life.
But am just a woman maybe a bunny who is in love with this guy and sincerely wish for his happiness. If it is true the he saw me in his own shoe…. then I know the feeling of a scorpio man… that he is miserable if he is into relationship or any situation without love… without passion.
This experience is lessons for growth. Yes… that love is beyond myself.
I have to let him go… but I pray that few months later… years later when I try to feel him I want to feel a happy Scorpio. It’s alright that he did not choose a life with me but I hope that he always choose himself… his own happiness…. and that he found the one that completes him.
He wants me to move on…. I will….
I will have to face the truth… live with it and let go of whatever illusions.
I love him…. every time I closed my eyes and think of him.. I thank God that he’d been in my life once up a time. I will remember him as a gift… a gift that helps me create myself again and bring back to God.
I will be fine…. I know God is with me on this one……
Now I understand…..
I was never betrayed… it was his honesty that remains until the end. The beauty of his strenght and integrity has empowered me to get back up to my feet and understand what does it all means.
To love a man is to understand him and to understand the love of God within you. When you feel the unlimitted love of GOD within you then only you are capable of giving unconditional love. Unconditional love is something that must be felt inside you… it should run through your veins. To love a man is to complete yourself in order to complete him without attachments to his gifts and even without him in your life. Just loving him for him…him in your heart so you want the best for him because you love him…..
In my case I fell in love to a Scorpio man… understanding him requires a thick skin and strong character to walk into his life that he could almost see himself, his own mirror in me. It’s like traveling in a stormy weather but you cannot allow yourself to fall or quit and in darkness where I felt the love of GOD…
This forum is a such a gift… so am sharing this little write up from the heart. I wrote this while on my way to office the other day 🙂
Bunnies…. LOVE IS GIVING……..
It feels great when it is real inside you. The peace and love I feel inside is something money can’t buy… so never be afraid… looking through the glass….
LOOKING THROUGH THE GLASS….
Stranded alone in a place with only darkness and emptiness.
In nothingness I long for God’s presence, through the waves of the ocean…
through the wind that moves around empty spaces…
I heard whispers saying…
You are own your own… I expect you to handle yourself…
Some familiar strength is empowering me to get back up to my feet.
Flow with the moment, in order to fight it….
I saw some reflections…. reflecting mirrors ….. it’s confusing…
I saw him in my mirror and then there’s another mirror… his mirror…
As I stare at his mirror in the face…. sadness reflects sadness.
Hunting memories of the past… tragedies.. sufferings…
As I look closer… it gives me chill in my veins.
I saw a girl still bruise, frightened and hide to protect herself.
When she’s looking back at me, I can see the anguish in her eyes.
The sense of loneliness remains. Forgiveness was not enough to forget.
The cause of her grief still lives and felt inside me.
Despising her has barred my soul and it reflects in the mirror.
I am battling in fear so I must understand her.
Tears just can’t wash away the fears that I haven’t faced.
The process of understanding gives incredible pain… sadness…
but even sadness and pain can flow through surrender…
I abandoned her many years ago and since I ran its gotten me nowhere fast.
I have to stop running, I must accept her and love her because she is me.
The girl in the mirror is me…
Yes… it’s me…
Her tears flowed… these are tears of relief…
she is free now… and I’ve never felt so free…
Then there’s my mirror… a new person is staring back at me…
I saw him… the man I used to know…
Reflection of passion that can pierce any soul.
Strength that can move ocean.
Traveled both heaven and hell for love.
She is not a new person.. She is still the same girl…
Before the sufferings and tragedies get the best out of her.
One passionate girl who can give love though her world is shattering around her.
There are things in this world that are unreachable.
People may reject and humiliate but I am not going to abandon her anymore.
The love… the passion… is within me….
These are gifts worth sharing to the world but I am not going to give it away.
The mirrors are reflections of my life…. his life…
I must break free not by running away from the mirror,
but looking through the glass and embracing both mirrors of me.
Through surrender and acceptance.
Through love and compassion… under God’s grace.
Today, as I wake up to a bright blue sky.
I realize that I’ve been so blessed! Amazingly blessed!
Oh God! I was never own my own. You’ve always been there for me.
I could stand here and testify that there is no greater love than your love.
You speak to me through the beauty of the world I see.
Through the people who came and touch my life.
Through your gifts…
I will trust you and I will never be afraid again.
I am offering my life to you…
and I am returning back the gift that has change my life forever.
Heal him…
He is such a blessing! Furry eagle that is!
All….
It would take all my life to find someone more…
but I will always go back to my heart… I will find him there…
Thank you for the gift.
glad you are feeling better Mari.
keep your feet planted on the ground. and look after your own life.
And through your bravery you inspire others.Im so glad that you have seen the beauty and strength of the girl inside you, who no matter how hurt she was, is still beautiful and strong, passionate and creative.
I
Hi-
I am an Aries and recently reconnected with a Scorpio man who I had “dated” (more like friends with benefits) about 7 years ago. We never ended up progressing the relationship. About 2 months ago we met up after not seeing each other for 7 years but kept in touch via emails multiple times a year. Once I saw him this time I knew something was different. We connected in a way I never anticipated. After a couple weeks he expressed his feelings for me. Telling me I had changed and had a sensitive side that he never saw before and always hoped for, and we could be so good together. That he could see a future with me. We had all night long phone conversations where we talked about our insecurities and our future. He even asked about what I thought my wedding would be like, etc. I was reeled in! Then about a month into it he told me he had fallen in love with me. He clarified that this was huge that he didn’t just love me, he was “in” love with me and that he had never told a woman that first ever and this was big for him.
He was very attentive for the first few days after that and then started to pull back a bit. He was less open about how he felt for me and the overflow of compliments lessened a bit. We still saw each other, sex was awesome like ususal and I was always there for him as he lost his job and was really worried about money. About 4 weeks after he told me he loved me he disappeared. I am crushed.
He did this to me before when we were just friends with benefits but now it is heart breaking. When we were having out heart to hearts I asked him not to ever disappear on me again, and I wouldn’t leave him without notice. We agreed to talk to each other if things weren’t working. That is one of the reasons this hurts so much.
It has been a little over a week now. I waited a week since I last talked to him on the phone and sent a text just saying I was giving him some space but now I missed him and was wondering what was going on. No response. So that night I left him a message just saying I wanted to hear from him and that for him to know I would be pestering him (light and jokey). No response. So the next day I sent the last text saying I was here, a little worried and that I just wanted to hear from him and that I missed him. No response.
It is just confusing as he was talking marriage thoughts, and said at one point I was the love of his life. We have known each other for years. He knows my family and we have so much in common. Our chemistry is undeniable and he told me he has never been attracted to a woman like he is with me. I was a sure thing at that point so he didn’t need to lie to me. 🙂 I really felt he was feeling strongly.
I know he has serious financial issues right now and probably needs to go to his cave but I wonder if I will ever hear from him again. I need to stay away but it terrifies me because I love him. Any thoughts?
Hi Shan,
it sounds to me something is up. Have you tried calling him?What was your last phone convo like?What exactly happened right before he disappeared?Might need to explore this.The job situ could be at the crux of it.. not having money etc. You said you need to stay away.. why do you say that?
Yes I left a message which was a week after the last convo. I basically just said that I wanted to hear from him and made some joke about how I will pester him. The last convo was basically a half hour conversation while I was at work. We just talked about basic stuff, nothing out of the ordinary. I know he was stressed about $ since it was the first of the month and he was super worried about money and his living situation. I said I need to stay away because he obviously doesn’t want to talk to me. He got two texts and a voicemail and no return contact. I have no patience and would like to know if I just need to put closure to this. Does he still love me and is in his cave then he should just tell me. If he doesn’t love me after a whole month (augh!) then he should tell me that too. I feel heartbroken and the unknown is not helping.
“…I have no patience and would like to know if I just need to put closure to this. Does he still love me and is in his cave then he should just tell me…”
He will love you forever little Aries. Never doubt that.
He’s going through inner-hell, so he doesn’t want your innocence or happiness affected by the essential carnage which he’s dealing with. It’s not a “you and him problem”… it’s a vastly psychological thing he’s fighting. That is your reason for the unexpected separation.
When we need space, we need time alone to give you the gifts of our best-self. Our main concern when falling hard for a woman… is taking those intense and naturally destructive powers of our personality and feelings, into the relationship itself. Dragging you thru that destruction is not loving, to our souls. Women don’t understand us, what we go through, so he doesn’t want to impose his Hades ambivalence onto you, as that energy will rip your heart and purity to shreds.
To get an idea of what I’m saying here, watch the movie “New Moon”.
The actress who plays Bella in that movie is a feisty, clear-minded, bouncy Aries. The vampire guy Edward, is a real-life Taurus, however… his Character, his character’s psyche, intensity, emotional depth, emotional withdrawal, his great integrity, honor of self and to humanity, his poise, his self-restrain in the face of inner-power struggles and sheer harnessed power/aggression…. is that “the reality” of a highly evolved Scorpio male.
Edward leaves Bella for a few months which leaves her very confused. He feels for so deeply he does not want his “destructive nature” to hurt Bella’s innocence. So she is ripped apart inside from that reality of him leaving without a reason. She feels “continuous death” in her core being during her wait for him to return. While alone and missing and longing for his energy… Bella mentions “the absence of him is everywhere I look” … or something to that effect.
Watch the movie and series Shan. Like millions of women involved with Scorpio energy, you are feeling the void of the unknown through HIS search for the unknown world, (beyond ego) which he is trying to connect personal meaning to. For example… your guy’s financial problems are not your concern. He wants to treat you and the relationship itself with financial potency and not expect you to be the man and provide that potency. Our pride is very deep, this pride is much greater than Leo egotistical pride. Our approval grows from within, not from without, little Aries. We need time alone to nurture our soul in private. Most classic male Scorpios will never need to crave social approval outside their social personalities. We truly seek greater meaning past the fickleness of our ego-selves.
I hope you can understand these personal realities, which have nothing to do with “not loving” you.
Best,
Pluto.
hmmm.. well he may well still love you but be consumed with his own shit at the moment.. but i think he needs to man up and let you know what is going on for him.. and you need to ask him. not in a text cos sometimes texting just doesnt cut the mustard. can you go and visit him? maybe he just needs a hug.
Hi Shan,
Well…how do you feel about him?
I love him. When he started talking about a future and telling me songs reminded him of me, like ones that say everything a girl would want to hear, and talked about how he loves my family, etc. I let go and fell hard. I cannot imagine someone going so strong and then just not having those feelings anymore. I really want it to be just his need to be alone, I can deal with that. I will be heartbroken if he goes from love to nothing in just a month. So frustrating. It was so difficult for him to tell me he loved me, I should take that seriously right?
Hi Shan,
I can´t tell you what to take seriously or not…that is something you have to learn to feel yourself. If I am not mistaken, your strong Arian nature would not want me to make that decision for you.
Shan, you have to look at your vocabulary….
I can´t imagine…
Everything that a girl wants to hear
How he loves my family
I really want it to be…
So frustrating…
All left with a big question mark at the end…
“I should take that seriously right”
So my question is…would you take these words seriously?
on a train that you’ve never been on before , a new land , rolling past the ocean, the sun is high in the afternoon sky ,shimmering the water..feeling free..
hey..
i like that
Hi Umm,
It brought tears to my eyes…when he surfaces with the board it was like…”wow!!!”
Then the dolphin…when he was inside the wave….
I try to imagine the feeling that must be like.
Thank you for sharing such a great video.
You’re welcome Gatubela , its cool huh.i liked the way it started then went straight into the ocean. yes surfing is a fantastic feeling, come and join me sometime!
Hi Umm,
Thanks for the invite. I have not really had the opportunity to surf…but I think I would be really nervous.
Just looking at that video made me feel like I was there…
I am more of a outdoors in the forest type of person. Actually, I plan to go cross country skiing alot this winter. I already have me a pair of skies waiting for me.
Remember those loons I was talking about? Well, they sound very beautiful here, at night.
but once you get the hang of it its really fun! i still get nervous sometimes.yum skiing that sounds great i havent been in years. so much fun. that lake looks gorgeous.. where is it?is it canada? i also love the forest . one day i would like to see canada and maybe go to alaska.pure wilderness..
ha ha ha.. Very true 🙂
I love the way he speaks
I love the way he thinks
I love the way he treats his mama
I love that gap in between his teeth
I love him in every way that a woman can love a man from personal to universal but most of all its unconditional
Love does not require words…it is silent. It is a force all in its own. We can drift on it…move with it and feel it going through our souls. It becomes us and we surrender to it.
We should all learn how it is to drift through life feeling love in our hearts. No harm will truly befall us, nothing is stronger . It fills us completely with light.
Hey, I’m a Scorpio male. I have been going with my girlfriend for two years and I couldn’t physically love her more and indeed emotionally. She’s an Aquarius so we do have some major issues. We fight like mad but at the end of the day it is all worth it. She ended up changing me as a person into a trusting, easy going bloke. I never use to be like this.. Now, I like myself more like this. I can control my passion, my feelings. I can express my self better then most people in a relationship, I just had to adopt and learn to be different in order to be with her. It was a very difficult thing to do but I promised my self I’d never lose her. Furthermore, she understands my needs and wants, that helped a lot too! But as I was saying we do have some problems, now. She just left to go to university, so as you can imagine jealousy and possessiveness is creeping right in. I think it’s tough being a Scorpio. It’s a cursed sign. I’ve no problems with being romantic, being with the person 24/7, caring for them, being faithful, I’d never cheat on my girlfriend, (I’ve heard a lot of scorps play away from home, having more than one relationships but I’m not one of them) My problem is that I’m too possessive of everybody. I’m a control freak. It’s my way or the highway with the exception of my girlfriend, really.. I have to bite my tongue and swallow my pride in order for us not to have a huge argument. I’ve hit her before, out of anger.. then I cried myself to sleep because I felt ashamed. I offered to break up with her because I’m not a violent person but that time I snapped. I just turned into an animal. She didn’t leave me. She said that I was worth all of the arguments and that gave me strenght to change into a better person. I would literally move mountains for her, I love her that much. I treat her like a proper woman she’s only 19 but I try to make her feel important and give her confidence. I totally devout myself, and give my heart and soul into the relationship. The biggest problem for me is that I think I think she doesn’t feel necessarily the same way for me in terms of attention. she can be aloof and cold at times, which bugs me! Needless to say, all sorts of thoughts enter my head while she’s away and being like that. I’m fighting a constant war with my self to control my crazy thoughts; of her finding another man, cheating.. It also puts a huge strain on the relationship if I’m accusing her of adultery. I know she’s faithful to me but I’m just a weirdo, really.. I will nit pick every possible scenario to make my self believe that she’s cheating. It’s a constant struggle, not with her, but with my self. But I will never give up. I’m miserable but I’m in love with the most beautiful human being that I have ever met. Without a doubt I’d rather be miserable and make her happy. Then be happy but without her In my life. Anyway, I just want to add that if you’re scared of a Scorpio; don’t be. What you will need is a monumental amount of effort.. In order to make it work! The way I see it if you love someone enough; you’ll change, you’ll make it work. No matter how fecking hard it is. Also, I’ve read through this page quite a bit last night and just want to tell you all that in my opinion if a Scorp really loves you then he wouldn’t even dream of despairing. So if they do, if they cheat, don’t wait for them! Sting them back and leave them your self. Trust me, they won’t show it but they’ll be dieing inside because they can’t have you anymore. Because they lost you. Fight fire with fire.
Thank you.
Hi Jack….
Darn it….I am not a Dude… I am a bunny!!!
But I could not help but responding!!! Hope you won´t think I am out to lunch here!
“The biggest problem for me is that I think I think she doesn’t feel necessarily the same way for me in terms of attention. she can be aloof and cold at times, which bugs me! ”
Oh…you are sounding rather Leo! LoL!!!
She seems very interested in “feeling” your needs – something that you recognize, so I would not call her cold. This is not easy to do with a Scorpio!!!
Have you told her what “temperature” you need? Maybe she needs your guidance there. You are not feeling the focus and intensity that you require?
“My problem is that I’m too possessive of everybody. I’m a control freak. It’s my way or the highway with the exception of my girlfriend, really.. ”
Why do you need control? Well probably because your own energy reacts with certain triggers…and these triggers are very “common” in today´s society. It makes me imagine that when you really think about it…it is not personnel…just very INTERNAL and part of you. You see something and then…..zing!!!! You react with all you got!!! Are you a people person? (probably not really) Not feeling the love in your heart as you do your daily routine? You reserve this special part of yourself for your girlfriend?
“I will nit pick every possible scenario to make myself believe that she’s cheating. It’s a constant struggle, not with her, but with myself. But I will never give up.”
You need to communicate with her….but this is probably why her “coldness” bothers you. What do you need from her, in order for you to not feel jealous or insecure? Have you identified that part of yourself? I sure hope that it is humanly possible for her to help you there .
She sounds like a lucky girl….
‘Oh…you are sounding rather Leo! LoL!!!
She seems very interested in “feeling” your needs – something that you recognize, so I would not call her cold. This is not easy to do with a Scorpio!!!
Have you told her what “temperature” you need? Maybe she needs your guidance there. You are not feeling the focus and intensity that you require?’
I guess I don’t feel the intensity, I know she love me but I feel I knd of expected more. Maybe I’m a moron to demand such needs but it’s just the way I feel. I just seem to get the impression that at times her head is elsewhere. It seems at times that she almost has to get away from me and breathe a little. I understand that, but implementing that into my actions is rather difficult. I have made an improvement but still; it’s a struggle. We have been talking about what I want but it very short lived. It got to the point where I just try to forget about it. Maybe thats what I should do but this unrest is still at the back of my mind.
‘Why do you need control? Well probably because your own energy reacts with certain triggers…and these triggers are very “common” in today´s society. It makes me imagine that when you really think about it…it is not personnel…just very INTERNAL and part of you. You see something and then…..zing!!!! You react with all you got!!! Are you a people person? (probably not really) Not feeling the love in your heart as you do your daily routine? You reserve this special part of yourself for
your girlfriend?’
You got it exactly spot on. I have a lot of acquaintances but only two friends and my girlfriend, no family. You know when you put it like that; maybe I am trying too hard to be on top of everything, on top of my girlfriend. The problem for me is application, I can see a problem, I have the solution but applying it is a different story. Again, I have made a big effort to calm my emotions and needs but the outcome is the same. I feel overwhelmed in my own thoughts sometimes. I analyse everything and when I do the ‘zing’ happens and off I go. A storm in a tea cup. I should just relax but it’s not me. I’m intense person.
‘You need to communicate with her….but this is probably why her “coldness” bothers you. What do you need from her, in order for you to not feel jealous or insecure? Have you identified that part of yourself? I sure hope that it is humanly possible for her to help you there .
She sounds like a lucky girl….’
I need reassurances at all times.
I was in ‘puppy love’ at one point in school and experience ended very badly for me. I got laughed at for wearing my heart on my sleeve. I got cheated on by the same girl twice.. I tried to give it another go after the first time. It failed miserably, she cheated on me again, pretty much in front of me. So from that point of you, I feel very insecure about my self. Don’t get me wrong, I think I’m good looking, I’m pretty funny.. I think I pay attention to detail to girls and make them feel special. So when that happened to me. I couldn’t understand what I was doing wrong. I was 17 by the way. I was young but never the less I still felt like I knew a fair bit about life considering the circumstances I grew up in. Yet, I completely let my guard down and let my self be treated like I don’t even know. The point is; I have never got over that incident and now my girlfriend is paying for it. Now, I could go about this this way; leave her… But the next girl will come along and I’ll still be same old insecure bloke who can’t trust anyone. Don’t get me wrong. I trust my
girlfriend but the part of me won’t let go because of someone else’s work. I would rather, shut up and put up with it, suffer inside. Deal with it. Then lose her and be just the same as I was. I hope that makes sense. I know Scorpios are the jealous, possessive types but I think my problems are way more deep than that. I do love her. I just hope she can understand that. I hope she trust in me to be a better person.
‘And one last thing….
Giving and recieving hits…is not good for anyone in a relationship…personal experience talking here….I do look at it as a “it takes two…”
I am glad that you worked this out. You must have found a way to handle this part of yourself. But also, it would be a good idea to figure out what made you go into a beast. This is a very important part of you. In my experiences, feeling ashamed or crying (although understandable) is not the way to get out of the vicious cycle…There is a deeper issue, based on fear?
You have to find love just the same, and not shame.’
Yes, It isn’t I witnessed my dad beating my mum so it left and extra bitter taste in my mouth. I felt ashamed because I never thought I could stoop to his level. I was wrong. It hurt me because I said I loved her, yet I hit her. I was very upset. I will never ever lay a hand oh her again. Jealousy, it makes me an evil person. I mean, I’m not jealous of material things but guy friends and my girlfriends don’t mix. Some guy was hitting on her and I logged on to her computer only to find his profile on screen and being a suspicious person that I am; I hit her. I hit more then once. I thought my world has ended. I thought she’s cheating. I didn’t know what to do… I felt so ****** *******. I thought that is it… I cried, she cried, we sat in the same room and I could feel that she was hurt! I could feel that I’ve done something terrible that I shouldn’t have ever done.
And one last thing….
Giving and recieving hits…is not good for anyone in a relationship…personal experience talking here….I do look at it as a “it takes two…”
I am glad that you worked this out. You must have found a way to handle this part of yourself. But also, it would be a good idea to figure out what made you go into a beast. This is a very important part of you. In my experiences, feeling ashamed or crying (although understandable) is not the way to get out of the vicious cycle…There is a deeper issue, based on fear?
You have to find love just the same, and not shame.
Hi Jack,
The problem for me is application, I can see a problem, I have the solution but applying it is a different story.
Scorpionic fixity: Black hole gravitational forces, that can not be released. You can see it very clearly and are awake, but something happens in the “known”…
You are missing love energy Jack….without it, you don´t have wings.
I got laughed at for wearing my heart on my sleeve. I got cheated on by the same girl twice.. .
Sorry about that….but I hope you can laugh at this video….
I felt ashamed because I never thought I could stoop to his level.
You did not stoop to his level…you were taught his level….and did not perceive a more effective way to handle things. If you had known what you know now, then…would you still have done it? Give yourself time to grow and be a better person.
I’m not jealous of material things but guy friends and my girlfriends don’t mix.
Hmmmm….In Latin America, you can´t trust any guy. (love the s in girlfriend….LoL!) You should ask yourself ” What are you attracted to? ” I sure hope it is someone who makes you feel completely loved!
“… I just seem to get the impression that at times her head is elsewhere. It seems at times that she almost has to get away from me and breathe a little..”
The female Aquarian nature is detached mentally and emotionally from turbulent possession, both of them-selves and of other people. I have dated and known many Aquarian women. Their psyche or life psychology is Air, meaning- Social Intellect. Her behavior is natural Jack. It’s not threatening or agenda based. Her mentality is not churning in deeper, darker, muck. Those types of sinister deceptions or mind games happen when interacting with our nutty controlling sisters… female Scorpio’s, hahaha.
The Aquarian mind is naturally social, always curious and very adept at understanding other people’s interactive quality and reality. Aquarian people are really the sign of “live at let live”… which your girlfriend is doing in her own way with you and everyone else around her. It’s innocent man because her core does not want to control your needs for control. She won’t ever invest herself emotionally toward you as a Scorpio nature naturally does in close relationships. She’s built differently than you. The key is to see in depth the truth of her reality each moment, her sociability in the moment, free of intentional sexual ploys, in that she has no evil intent to cheat on you, seduce others or keep sexual secrets from you or deceive you. Her intrinsic nature is not you Jack. Trust me.
However, I will say from my own evolutionary experiences with women… the more we show a woman insecurity, meaning the more we display expressive fears that she could be cheating or loving some other guy, the more those feelings of lack, or inadequacy within us will come true in the outside world. Why?? Well… she will always feel your fears, lack and doubts about yourself, you’ll scare her off and destroy the relationship. I have frightened many women away in my adult life by being just like that. I was totally unconscious of the inner representing my outer being. Any woman will always love you Jack, any woman will remain faithful to only you if ‘she knows’ that you would completely be OK with her leaving you. Sounds backwards right?.. Well, women are backwards brother. The less importance you place on your fears of abandonment or betrayal and controlling vices (which I’ve done over the last 5 years) the more your woman, any woman, will want you for your soul center, your solid heart intelligence and unique character.
Women just know when a man is being a man and mastering himself first, while empathizing with her needs simultaneously. Sharing feelings is healthy… but it’s a good idea to become conscious of ourselves if that sharing is based from fear. The more you individualize your being, the more you can control the hold or direction of your expression under any circumstances with women and in life. So the more you can completely discern between your inner reality woes from her mind reality whims… the more “you will see” that your fears have nothing to do with hers or what she’s doing or not doing. You will see that nobody else is responsible for the controlling vices you project. You’ll know only you are responsible for that dysfunction. Co-dependency is a trap man.
I know exactly what you feel for her… the carnage… the suspicions, the negative energy eating your happiness away. I say be aware of Hades (death of personality)… because your re-occuring ambivalence means a higher power wants you to— let-Go… and let God. Feel the present, kill the ego need for possession of her reality.
When we as brave, honorable men, are inwardly prepared to leave an unhealthy situation, a woman, an argument, a fight, regardless of the intensity of love we feel for that woman… we have learned to kill the ego, to walk away and nurture our light and dark with or without her consent. We as complex Scorpio males do not need the consent of women to receive love. Who we are… and What we become by being present in the moment with women, will create all the love we want and need. It’s all psychological brother. Find the inner Warrior and Master ones emotional immortality.
Best regards.
Hi Again Jack….
“I guess I don’t feel the intensity, I know she love me but I feel I knd of expected more.
Hmmmm….Both of you focussing on God, is extremely important because of the effects of Scorpionic Magnetism on a woman who is surrendering to your intensity and passion (and possession), while striving to maintain a complete sense of herself. She has to be a spiritual being in her own right, with her own sense of who she really is, in order to be able to love back. Or rather…invest herself in the relationship.
A woman that does not have her own spirituality…trial and tribulation tested, may leave you feeling like you are being a moron.
Leaving the Dynamics to “SELF” and not SOUL…can end rather disasterously.
………..Any woman will always love you Jack, any woman will remain faithful to only you if ‘she knows’ that you would completely be OK with her leaving you. Sounds backwards right?.. Well, women are backwards brother……………….
I thought I was crazy…. but this is so true! darn!
….A woman that does not have her own spirituality…trial and tribulation tested, may leave you feeling like you are being a moron….
Well… rock her boat a little bit…. let her walk into your life…. understand how it feels to be like you and understand herself…
” Any woman will always love you Jack, any woman will remain faithful to only you if ‘she knows’ that you would completely be OK with her leaving you.”
I have given my thoughts to this one.
The truth is , a woman is aware of fears….but because a guy is scared, means that she gets “scared” off and runs away? What the heck is she made of, that makes her so darn perfect and inhuman?
If a woman has learnt to face her own fears, the last thing she will do, is run. She will face yours as well, as they come up through the dynamic, and offer the opportunity to heal. Believe me, this is not easy.
You should know this…you meet her “needs” and are attentive and caring with her. I am sure that you are VERY comfortable, getting to know EVERY aspect of her….while maintaining your sense of identity and probably very attractive and vibrant manhood. What about her fears and insecurities? Meeting those head on?
Why shouldn´t a woman try to be as focussed and intense on her man? She won´t be an expert like you and a bit clumsy, but this adds to her own sense of wanting to get to know you and invest herself…her heart and soul, into onto and around YOU.
Unfortunately, women are at a disadvantage with Scorpio men…unless they have their own way of loving and giving.
Scorpio men are stronger, smarter and have these abilities that can place a woman, wanting to love you for who you are, in a complete state of “bunny trembles”…
It is either “the look”….the darkness….the shadow….distance….silence….your hades being thrown at her…or in my case…getting hit, death threats and children coming into danger.
Actually, nice guys should come first…..
Trying to understand the reasons why they don´t….is very mind boggling.
“… a woman is aware of fears….but because a guy is scared, means that she gets “scared” off and runs away?…”
I perceive the feminine as Bunnies for a reason. I must say though in my experience… the vast majority of males can be weaker than women in terms of identity and conviction. If a male cannot “move” a woman and keep her on her little toes… he is not a male. He is a passive puppet. And that’s not real love, to me.
Worldwide, Attractive women have a power. Almost all men kneel to that sexual power. They are conquered before a word is said. Men salivate for sex, as an animal would want to fornicate the nearest frisky thing. Men court, they buy gifts, they accomodate her every whim and complaint, they please her to no end, they do not rock the boat, they either mute themselves to avoid meaningful conflict or they get utterly consumed by meaningless conflict which has no basis, no constructive direction or solution. Why??… He is too weak within to handle the unknowns of himself and life as it comes. He wants to control life’s detailed circumstances and people, as he has no faith of the bigger power which laughs at his futility and sadness.
Women need fertile men. Sure… a virile, kind, dangerous male might frighten her… but there is no denying that he excites her. Most dudes think fertile means an ego-confident machismo that women want. Ha. Women giggle everyday at that predictable blindedness.Yet women still marry such ordinary type men for other reasons besides love. Most couples don’t marry (or relate) for human love. Other agendas and material comforts take priority.
Less is always more in my world. Not forcing things or people. Of course I do nuke the nearest person who wants to mock me or undermine me in front of others for their personal kicks…. but other than that, my intensity is usually contained and directed for the greater good. It would be so easy for me to abuse others out of pure-self interest.Too easy. Yet I don’t. That’s because I am instinctually in tune with an infinte energy far more potent than my insignificant ego-self. Trusting ourselves while navigating the unknown is the scarey part most people don’t ever dare tread. Comfort and predictability is the goal for most. I feel alive in the unknown. It gives my tough experiences through life deeper meaning.
“Most couples don’t marry (or relate) for human love. Other agendas and material comforts take priority.”
I have experiences that actually agree with this. Not only with couples, but with almost every interaction. Or rather, there is a lack in the search of a loving harmony within the interaction, through a lack of dealing with our I prefer to “slapyou the face” incompetence in this department.
We can´t all be experts on what exactly that is, but it seems that people, in general, aren´t even trying! We don´t opt foridentifying what the issue is and putting our energy into solving our problems, we opt for entering a “talkathon” of perpetuating and narcissitic lies, bilndness, and disregard for the other person´s energy, values and essential vulnerability.
It requires you to feel the pain of your reality and not trying to escape from it, through “blinding” feel good interactions.
Maintaining our soul energy, for Scorpio can mean one thing. But for me, it is the balance between my light and my night.
It must be different for Scorpio, because of the intensity….
Ouch!
I am a Scorpio male. I just want to put it out there the things I expect from the girl I am with (btw currently I’m dating a libra).
I don’t like it when she is not truthful because thus makes me think if she is cheating on me.
I don’t like her to talk to boys, even if they are her friends. Talking to her friends makes me very suspicious.
I expect her to tell me how did her day go. When she tells me about her day I can easily sense if she is telling the truth.
I like her to text me or call me after a couple of days. Keeping gap makes me think about her and makes me want to see her.
I like it when sometimes she commpliments me but not too much because I become suspicious that she may be hiding something or doing this to cover something.
I don’t like it when she goes away from me, unless she calls me and tells me about her day.
**one thing that I hate the most when she talks about her old relationships or describes other men. This is the BIGGEST mood change for me and I get really angry.**
Uh…Hi SG….
I´m gonna be REAL Leo on this one! So bear with me!
Is she aware of your honesty and requisites in feeling comfortable in a relationship? I sure hope so.
A woman feeling love, would probably be very honest with you, but gets confused between expressing love …and following them rules there…
If interrogated on any possible “infractions”…her response should not be defensive…but tuned into her valuing and treasuring the relationship and making it flourish…with yer feathers a shining! We really should strive to bring out the best in each other.
What!!! Only sometimes compliments you? But what if you are really awesome to her? Or she is proud of you? She has to be quiet? Maybe you could give her classes on “a look says more than words” can.
Huh?!!! Call or text after a couple of days? But if she is not allowed to talk to guys or friends…I am afraid you are IT!!!! Be prepared to hear all about her day….her feminine problems…and all of the things that normally you would keep quiet about…but she won´t! Good Luck!
I understand that you probably want her to focus on you as you do her.
Hi again S.G.,
“**one thing that I hate the most when she talks about her old relationships or describes other men. This is the BIGGEST mood change for me and I get really angry.**”
Or rather, after you scorpionically verified that she is doing it to gain control over you or “mindlessly” playing “don´t care about your core essence and the energy being cultivated between you and me” games. You are right…other men and women have no place in the dynamic between two people. They are not “making transformative love” with you, while you are with her, right?
But what if she needs your help? Needs to understand something about herself…wants to be a better person…wants to get rid of a problem…is in the process of transforming herself and does not want to make the same mistakes with you? How do you go past the previously learnt “experience barrier”? What can you and her transform?
Are you worried that she “DOES” not want to handle it? That she is disrespecting you? Is this a “you are mine” Scorpio thing?
My husband talked about all the women he had known too…and of course, they meant nothing to him…but neither did I it seems.
I have tried to go through my life, ignoring men, but it has not worked…and actually following a rulebook won´t help her in these kinds of situations. You know that. She can´t kill every guy…like you can. You have to teach her to deal with it, the other way.
Scorp guy…
She will disregard you…because you are egocentric. Maybe not, if you are bloody rich …(and it won´t matter if you are hot.)
That is what you are doing, right? Guess her loving you is not in the contract? Don´t see that rule there, but you should NOT expect that from her. Love.
I will add one by giving a brief:
I expect her spend all of her time and energy catering to my…security blanket, anger, jealousy…and FEARS.
And..I will give an explanation…she might be interested.
Because…I expect it and like it.
That will fit in her wallet for quick referance.
And if I am not mistaken, you expect her to get all excited over you too?
Here is an idea of “a look says more than words”…
The cat does not really look sad…
Sigh….she has to understand why you feel that way. I have posted that in Latam…those rules are acceptable, based on the concept two people wanting to focus on eachother…
But sometimes, putting rules …is a lie as well. Should it not be the opposite? I am looking at it from the perspective that she really cares about you and has no intention of not running away from scorpionic zingers and handling those very deep and profound energies.
Hello Umm, are you still with us??
I would like to talk to you about something important away from the forum . Please email me if you don’t mind, this private matter is important… would love to hear from you.
P.Puppy
THIS IS TO THE SCORPIO WHO STARTED DATING A LIBRA WOMAN.
HE WAS SAYING HOW SHE SHOULD BE WITH HIM, GREAT.
BUT DOES HE ACT HE WAY SHE THINKS HE SHOULD? OR IS IT A DOUBLE STANDARD?
Hi bh1234,
…it is a harsh reality that we talk about “acting” and “thinking” …when starting a relationship with a person, because those are the “foundations ” on which we will continue to grow on. It seems rather shakey. There will certainly “emerge” a double “something”….eventually.
But you mention something that is very valueable, that made me want to share with you.
gatubela,
“acting” and “thinking”
but isnt love the base of a serious relationship?,arent the divine feminine and the diven masculine supused to merge?its true that if you have a thought about someone it can effect the relationship allot. or the if you do something it can change for the good or bad.but those arent what the relationship should be based on.
gatubela,
“acting” and “thinking”?
but isnt love the base of a serious relationship?,arent the divine feminine and the diven masculine supused to merge?its true that if you have a thought about someone it can effect the relationship allot. or the if you do something it can change for the good or bad.but those arent what the relationship should be based on.
Hi…Christian and Sag Wolf…(cute)
I feel that love is important, but not in the context that is given in society, as P.Puppy says. If you think of it in terms of what is supposed to happen, then you are entering the relationship with expectations.
I would say…”Expect to get yer panties or gotchies shocked right off of you at all of the interesting things that start combining, when in a relationship”…Like “whoooah…where did that come from!” The foundation where these “real shockers” land, is the basis…love is part of it.
Certain energies need to be “entrusted” to a loving partner…but actually, is there such thing as good or bad? My intuition says “no”…there is only love and no love, and how we try to express it.
Putting this into real practice, is easier said than done, because you actually have to fight for it. This energy, seems contrary to love…and I feel it is the basis for P.Puppy´s comments below.
Fighting is “bad”…because the foundation is usually ego, and not soul. The rules change, when you fight in a soulful dynamic…I feel that we as a society have to understand these “rules” a bit more.
Love can be shown in a harsh manner. Love from the core depends on our level of being. Not our thinking or acting. If we are acting, we are pretending to correct the illusion of being soul centered and we are pretending to be conscious of forces much greater than our immediate personality-self. Acting is not soul centered. Acting out our play in life is egocentric, it’s not motivated to empathize, yet it’s oblivious to death of personality and rebirth of heart and soul, felt through our expression and our communication. Not having the innate gifts to empathize with another human being in the moment, regardless of uncomfortable feeling through apparent confrontation, is not the foundation or resolution of awareness one needs for fundamental personal development beyond our tiny ego balloon.
Avoiding conflict at all costs and constant tentative people pleasing… is to me… the most destructive, insidious choice of manifestation in terms of how we humans evolve. Yes, love means to yield. Yes, Love means to empathize to encourage and to engage. Yet, the hypocrisy of expressing ourselves from the ego-personality reality does not see, nor does it understand the energies of DISCERNMENT, of BRAVERY and of JUSTICE. Those three powerful inner-resources are usually not even known, nor applied in relating or loving another person… IN THE MOMENT. When those three virtues are missing, due to lack of consciousness… we “exist”, we might be cool, popular, exciting, and have harmonious friendships and relationships, yet… these “normal” societal dynamics always remain futile, redundant and meaningless. That energy cultivates stagnant relationships. Hence infidelities. Hence lies, bullshit, and break-ups. Hence divorce and personal despair. Personal growth and transformation of others is not known through that state of the personality. Transformation is only possible when one can see and feel deeper planes of all reality, then that person’s reality must have the fortitude to speak up and BE that purpose, be that soulful cause… be that real loving. As a result, Pretending to be someone has been destroyed and exhumed for something much greater.
Subconsciously, confrontation between sober or non sober adults is mostly unsubstantiated and highly immature. Ego motivated confrontations are played out, like a movie, for the lower desires of pure self-interest and the fragile ego need to save face and nothing more. No strength of character or resolution or love is intended from that place. Playing and winning the game to feed ones weakness and inner futility- is the intention. That is not love in my world. Yet that is what the pervasive collect mind “thinks” love is. That mentality, that common state of reality, and that fear of not wanting to feel whatever their is to feel at any cost, is one fraction of why the personality-self will never fathom the necessity for discernment, the virtue of bravery and the beauty of justice.
Ego motivated confrontations are played out, like a movie, for the lower desires of pure self-interest and the fragile ego need to save face and nothing more
Save face? Please…people are not interested in saving face. Not really.
That is complimenting this behavior
It is something else they are after.
Immediate satisfaction of putting you in your place, where you belong in their little comfort zone. It is easier to be reduced to something more inferior than their comparison of themselves to you.
As if they are the “upper limit” of the humanity scale.
They want you to feel…what they should have, but cowardly choose not to.
” It is something else they are after. Immediate satisfaction of putting you in your place, where you belong in their little comfort zone…”
Yes… there is a distinction in my human life experiences. When people are in groups, socializing candidly in a public environment, their expression with me presents “a tough, clever, richer, superior and bad-ass” personality. Yet when you encounter these same specific people alone, one-on-one, face-to-face… they are merely a vapor of “the-self” they once pranced when everyone else, their friends… were looking, or watching.
So that’s why I said people like that “save face”. They want to prove their strength and cleverness in front of their group to impress, to gain peer approval… yet the cowardice underneath this front always shines through when that person is forced to be strong and clever one-on-one with me personally. They completely change. I’ve had many outspoken exchanges with gangs of people, yes tight-knit clans… face-to-face. It’s quite amusing when they eventually separate from each other, then I encounter the “real person underneath” the false-front. They look down at the ground, not making eye contact with me. They are simply afraid. It’s common behavior.
” They want you to feel…what they should have, but cowardly choose not to…”
Well, the thing is Violet… I have already felt their turbulent ambivalence in my past… and I feel their ego-manipulation in that moment of what they want me to feel. Again, nothing I haven’t experienced before. That’s the trap of being, of including yourself among the lowest common denominator.
That level of fear is everywhere darling. The fact is, People want to bring down others to feel safe and coddled and special. My life’s evolution has taught me much, in that I can actually bring out “the worst” in others. Meaning, I can locate their weakest spot psychologically and emotionally and reveal powerful subconscious fears that they didn’t know previously existed. So…. that is why, I am very serious about my social responsibility. I am fully aware of what I say, always. So I do not want to abuse others. That control of others sickens me if I know I am doing it. Because I know it is for tyranny. I despise the behavior of tyrants. So becoming one myself is a unforgivable betrayal of my core values and soul as a changed man. I truly want others to speak as freely and openly as I do. I would truly respect that choice. Yet, the patterns I see in my social life are mostly people who want to pull down others, while hypocritically not investing,n or expressing their own constructive or dismal experiences for us to learn something from. Their is the student and teacher in me. Most people are not students or teachers of their lives. That’s just reality.
Indifference is all that level of people really know, understand and utilize for personal gain. It’s all extremely subtle. They manipulate, cajole, politicize baseless arguments which go nowhere, but always end up pointing at how “Right” they are and how full of myself I am. Funny huh?
Of course I know the intricacies of the game. But my life is about revealing the game for what it is. My life’s mission is not to be a participant in the game. You should imagine how difficult that is for me.
In stark comparison, as you have mentioned and witnessed over time here on the forum… I am the antithesis of that indifference in my life and in my death.
However, in order to be anything virtuous, we have to know ourselves, well… really well. To know our dark and insecurities as well as our creative gifts. If we do not seek Integrity (verb) through troubled or conflicting circumstances, we play out the lies or myths of “who we think” we are. When really, who we think we are is not the Truth and Soul of who we can Be.
Hello Pluto Puppy I have read through your post and I love the honesty that you profess. I would love to email you I need a man’s advice on this situation I’m going through.
Hi Rose,
If you want to ask me something, I’d be happy to contribute an answer which may help you. Please refer back to post 393 on this forum as my email is there. I’d rather not repeat that info.
This is no light matter, research on line how to protect yourself from key logger virus, there are ways, sometime you don’t know if you are being targetted, but if you are, there are trapps everywhere and in every form. Do not vist links, this is what I know, but emails could be another channel, I’m not sure, and not pointing finguers, but try to share some info that may protect the unaware. Do not open attachment, if you did, back up and format computer, do not type in your personal info on the infected computer before you format.
This is no light matter, research on line how to protect yourself from key logger virus, there are ways, sometime you don’t know if you are being targetted, but if you are, there are trapps everywhere and in every form. Do not vist links, this is what I know, but emails could be another channel, I’m not sure, and not pointing finguers, but try to share some info that may protect the unaware. Do not open attachment, if you did, back up and format computer, do not type in your personal info on the infected computer before you format.
Yes, that info is true. Be cautious, I’ve advocated not professing love to anyone online in the past here on the public forum, but don’t live in fear or promote fear either on a public forum where we, a few mainstay people, have built genuine relationships in front of a group of timid spectators. I’ve been writing on here for over three years. I didn’t start yesterday.
When I ask to talk to someone, and for them to contact me in via a PUBLIC ENVIRONMENT of all places, a message like the one you are broadcasting is paranoid and suggestive. If your fears feel I am doing something suspicious or questionable, you should contact me directly and investigate your doubts for yourself, instead of politicizing baseless doubt. What you have communicated in duplicate posts above, is something like what a Tabloid magazine would write to amass followers. Hahaha, Allow me to ease your unwarranted fears.
Now for a mature topic, please.
The truth is, I’m a huge target for worldwide shady characters. Get your thinking right. Many deceptive attempts have been sent to my email inbox. You should be protecting me, LoL!
protect YOURSELF Pluto, that is actually what I meant… I hope I am being paranoid, as a victim of such attack usually is, paranoia is better than being a target any day. But people need to be warned… Links, emails… be careful. I hate to say this, but trust no one you don’t already know from here. get programs like online armor (it had a free version) that would target key logger virus and monitor it at all times, and tor networks which protect your ip when you visit site you don’t feel comfortable with. Please, take what I say seriously.
I do take what you say seriously. I laughed because I’m a grown man talking to a bell ringer with no identity in the expression. Thank you for your antsy concern, but please rest assured I am capable of discerning what is of dark origin and what is of harmless origin.
may you live forever.
Living in fear is a self-fulfilling prophecy. I suppose I’m lucky because so much of what I see throughout life is so transparent. Still, I empathize with your experiences. A suggestion would be to learn from your involvement with those past deceptions. People can only abuse and use us if we allow them.
…I’m jojo… I hope no one ever come to be a target because of me…but because I don’t know how bad is the situation, or even how many people I don’t know are behind these attacks, or if they are here already or not, I can only warn you. I already cost so much to every one and I don’t even know why anyone find my boring life worth attack or what have I ever done to them…I’m sorry, be careful…and this goes to anyone I can’t say it in face to…I’m sorry…be careful… I won’t speak again.
JoJo it’s nice to hear from you again. No, you’re not boring at all. You are actually one of the few who have seen the unseen with me, so for that I love your courage to speak openly about what you see between different people. Your views, much like mine and Gatubela’s are mostly objective, peering in to the truth of an equation, “a disagreement” and not wanting to be right or showing wrong. You just tell it like it is. We care for you here… hope your life is getting stronger and happier through self-love.
Pluto
this is so right about scorpio men , freaks me out i am a libra woman and i have been dating a scorpio man for 9months but thats were it ends for the past 5months his been hot and cold 1minute he strongly believes im not the girl for him he aint gonna marry me so he cant be with someone if he knows he aint gonna marry them then i leave him alone and his ringing me telling me his misses me and still wants to see me.. but then he says he dont want me , now if that isnt hot and cold then i dont know what is….and also they are quite spiteful with there tongue i sometimes appreciate there honesty but my ex scorpio man sometimes said things and i would think is he really trying to hurt me for no reason or what? and then he would think about what he said and apologise…. if this is how all scorpio men are then i personally wouldnt wanna date another 1 again, i tend to only attract scorpio men… at 1st we have such an instant connection and the chemistry just works but then that spark always dies down… im 20 yrs old and i lost my virginity to this man and when we met he was so sure im the type of girl he wants a good girl bla bla and now his saying its not all about that… talk about a charmer! and head fuck!
Hi Angel,
I am going to be scorpionic on this one:
Nothing in your comment is TRUTH…So love will not be forthcoming.
So…yeah, it is all going to be a huge big lie anyways. Right in your face, because Scorpio is controlling the energy. What does he miss? Have you answered that?
So I expect the mutual mind fuck between the both of you.
When you truthfully want answers, you will ask for them. Until then…learn to seek them.
Hi again Angel,
Actually, in the absence of your own soulful truth, you will invent one – his shadow, in order to compensate for your lack of completion.
Ummmm…being a good girl…LoL! Love is not about being GOOD, or else there would be no such thing as forgiveness…or tolerance…or understanding…or compassion for people who are suffering, who have made great changes in their life and who understand what it means to want a better world. But truth is not on your agenda. Nor is Love…
Hence the fertile ground for “mind fucking” you, among the physical fuck as well. Why? Because your choice of vocabulary do not indicate that you are a “good girl”… You are resentful, angry…easy to manipulate…cater to your own desires…rationalize ….
You don´t act on what you know….and who you are….because you have not developed this part of yourself.
So…who he really is…is to be found in your comments….based on his effect on you!
Who you really are, is still unknown. You generalize about things and do not seek answers from him….
You “freak out” because you are scared by nature…
You feel that he is hot and cold, based on how you feel he should react to you, and not on being interested in how he feels or really is…
You are with him, because “he fluctuates between wanting to marry you and not wanting to marry you”…
You say his is spiteful…but are you sure? You don´t clarify…What is your definition of this…Being spiteful is a very subjective impression. So he says something “mean”…and it is spiteful. We should be stronger than that, don´t you think? Or you like being with a “sadist”? What does this say about yourself?
You feel that he is really trying to hurt you…are you sure? Why are you always hurt? Hurt is something that is subjective as well. Actually, it is based on something that you wanted to happen, but did not happen. Perhaps you will immediately take it to be personal…and as an attack. Try to understand WHY you are hurt.
Sorry about you loosing your virginity to a man that does not REALLY want to marry you…Please try to understand yourself in order to feel self love again.
thankyou for your comments… yes im very angry at him , and when i say spiteful he would say things such as, if i dont see myself marrying a girl i dont care how i treat her now,or things like sometimes i want to treat you right sometimes i dont, but he also said thats why he broke up with me because he isnt trying to use me.. so i do appreciate his honesty but he was my first love so im jus hurt at the moment.i didnt expect marriage ive just turnt 20 nthe last thing on my mind is marriage LOL. but he use to say he dont like thinking of it but his the one that was making decisions based on the future.. so he was very confusing in this way.. and also he claims his a muslim and the reason he dont see me as his wife is because i dont come from a religious background i am off turkish nationality but my parents are not religious and he never agreed with that and he said thats the kind of woman he wants , who covers her head and follows the religion but he sinned all the time followed none of the rules himself , he was such a hypocryt so because of all this i just think he is very confused and lost,
“… talk about a charmer! and head fuck! ”
Gatubela… Angel is only a baby, she hasn’t lived or died yet… so let’s cut her some slack. The perception above is true… of “entering” your mind and other heavenly tunnels, lol. Angel has a reasonable right to show a scrunchy face, and a pissed-off demeanor. If girls connect with male Scorpios who are un-involved, or lost and flip-floppish… that uncommitted game is really an unloving act. The consciousness of that level of male Scorpio, is indeed lost… but he’s also subconsciously on the hunt for a challenge. The challenge may be with himself… or he may be playing you along for sex and making spontaneous appointments to love you only for your body. Yes your body.
In classic Scorpio nature, I’m talking about the Lowly desire nature…e.g superficiality, material gains in partnerships, sex and mind games “for control” of another… means this:
That common level of Scorpion evolution (not of Eagle consciousness or being) subconsciously confuses sex for love, and love for sex. Yup. It’s that intense and murky. If your Scorpio is a follower of Muslim religion, he may even abide by strict celibacy ideologies which affect your intimacy with him beyond friendship. He may have extremist (rigid) ideas about love, courtship marriage and parallel expectations for a woman who also is of devout Muslim faith. If he is around your age, he’s also insecure in many ways yet doesn’t really know it. That’s normal. I don’t know… just throwing this out there. You’ll have to ask and discuss topics which really concern him… real topics which show through in his decision making (or non decision) process with you and everyone else.
Lowly, dimly Scorpios… btw, I was there for decades… don’t really know why they feel strong polarizing feelings and emotions within themselves. A Scorpio’s understanding of their own evolution really points back at how well do they know or understand their own darkness. Can they clarify their own issues openly? Do they seek higher answers to their struggles? Do they desire personal rebirth of mind, heart and soul by seeking the Truth of their own plight?
If Scorpio’s (male and especially female) wilt under the pressure of their own ego-fears (not in-touch with soul) of what’s true about themselves, they will play people along and believe the myth they create which comforts and supports their ego-self, while denying the immortal depth which exists deeper down. Some enormous questions remain… does your male Scorpio know himself well enough to just say “hey… I appreciate you as a person… but I feel I must move on…” or does he want to play the subconscious game of stringing you along like a kitty chasing a fluffy toy?
I’ve said it before… real men lead women with strength, dignity and integrity. Does he have the balls to tell you what’s really going on?
Hi P.Puppy…
I don´t feel like cutting her slack! LoL!
Not everyone is meant to live or die…but the option exists to understand themselves and try.
For me, she made a first step…
WoW!
Hi Angel….
Hmmmm….Darn…I don´t know too much about Turkish religions and women covering their heads and following.
But with your post, you seem to have come to an understanding, and to an answer based on disgruntled understanding and truth.
Confusing is when you are not clear on what love is, because you did not feel it in your soul.
In terms of spiteful….I was told very cruel things by a guy I actually did marry!
Feel the confusion, anger and hurt now…it really is better that you did, believe me!
Be gentle and loving…because choosing to do this now, is ….LOVING yourself.
“…Not everyone is meant to live or die…but the option exists to understand themselves and try…”
That’s right bunny. That’s why I had no expectancy in the context of my response to her. I had compassion knowing she could know what live or die IS, lol…. you also had compassion… with the stinger twist!! LoL
“Couldn’t know”
Hi P.Puppy,
“That’s right bunny. That’s why I had no expectancy in the context of my response to her. I had compassion knowing she could know what live or die IS, lol…. you also had compassion… with the stinger twist!! LoL”
No stinger twist…nothing that she did not show already! She has got spirit and fire…I only want her to cross that bridge and finish what she started.
She shows the energetic tools…I chose to guide her through them by jioning her in this journey.
I did not want to leave her alone in her anger…and help her ride the wave.
I have read this entire forum in the past couple of days and I feel as if it has been a transformative journey. I have not been in a relationship before and just entered my twenties. I have been focusing on my relationship to self. Everyday I practice Kundalini Yoga and meditatation to purify and cleanse my mind, karma, and ego. So much of what the recurrent members have said is incredibly revealing. I know I am not ready for a relationship with a man, because my most important relationship is with God/the Universe Source.
It is important to note that these meditations are not to sit in silence and feel peace. The purpose of meditations is to evoke our past karma, hurt, anger, deep-seated emotions, closed-minded beliefs and paradigms to heal and let go. I am not the same person since I started this practice and I will continue for the rest of my life. If anyone is curious, the highest kriya in this practice is Sodarshan Chakra Kriya. Google it and its virtues if you are curious.
Now there is one topic I do not understand. A highly evolved Scorpio needs his female love to submit to him and his masculine loving energy. Can someone describe to me how surrender can be empowering? Will the Scorpio man ever relinquish control to his love – if only for a few moments? I find the idea of submissiveness fascinating as I do have Leo energy in me (Venus, Jupiter, etc. – however I am a Virgo Sun by 0.03 degrees) and USED to think the idea of enthralling a man with my feminine energy to be very enticing. When Pluto Puppy describes his perspective, I become perplexed. Needless to say, I need more life experience.
But I am curious as to how power plays (if it all?) in a highly evolved relationship between a Scorpio man and his female love.
Thank you. 🙂
Hi Satnam,
Your comments about yoga and kundalini are interesting…I don´t meditate in terms of yoga…
I have some experiences in this that may contribute to your particular energy and journey and give some food for thought. I love to see comments such as yours, because you are making great decisions in your life, and unlike me…are doing it in a peaceful way.
It was not enough for me…at 20, to meditate on me. Actually, I wanted to actively LIVE it. APPLY my being…and love of GOD in my daily activities. For me, this is the TRUE test of purification. Intuitively,, I felt that my mind and soul must match.
You progress to the point that letting go is rather “subjective” and the more you begin to feel the energy…you begin to wonder….”DID I really let go?” If I did, then the experience should be reflected IN me…and around ME…through me and actually…
BY the FRUITs I produce….MY effect on the people around me. The incredible BURDEN of DUTY…as felt by the Christ energy…is coming into contact with this sensitivity.
It will be noticeable Satnam.
Would love to have some time to do yoga. Stll busy in the trenches….
However….in terms of submitting this energy to a guy….you can imagine the importance of knowing how to cultivate love, through harsh experiences…. – you know….loving even when dying and all that….
Power? I believe that when embarking in this type of life, the powers that be, will contact you! Everyone is different….
Where is your faith and determination in seeking the truth? You seem to be a bit passive there, but again, you have to feel these things in yourself and trust them.
Ask, and you shall recieve.
” Can someone describe to me how surrender can be empowering? Will the Scorpio man ever relinquish control to his love – if only for a few moments?”
Umm..no, he can´t. Due to his LIFE…(male divine qualities)
Divine feminine energy is actually a bit “negative”…
Without love…things have a tendency to not work out well. LoL!
True power through surrender, is invoking the powers of the divine, and therefore, is something beyond ourselves, Satnam.
Look….you are missing a very important step here…
You are healing yourself…releasing and purifying. What does your intuition say you have to do next?
If you don´t have that in you, you can´t develop your own unique personality and views that will be grounded. How can you actively choose anything? How can you firmly decide on LOVE?
The concept of surrender becomes a null or vacant concept, because you have not developed anything to surrender….So the exchange of energies between you and your guy, will not be felt at all, through you, because you won´t really KNOW what LIFE is. He won´t catalyze you at all.
If you can´t recognize it, then you won´t feel HIM – divine masculine, inside you.
So…as a woman, physically, what are you “creating”, with your choice of a guy?
And if surrendering, what are you divinely / energetically creating, between you and “that” guy?
“…Will the Scorpio man ever relinquish control to his love – if only for a few moments?…”
Yes as mentioned below, He does ego-surrender continuously during mind altering sex. He’s perched high and wide (Eagle) with laser intensity far above ground level insanity (Scorpion)… to see… to feel… the powerful universe flowing within himself and flowing within her. His sexual instinct is so strong… he’s mastered it’s control of his life. No easy feat ladies.
Their entire Union during trans-potent sex is of Primo Ego-Surrender.
We are not talking about buffoon Charlie, the conniving pick-up artist Scorpion playing mind tricks with chicks at the local bar every Saturday night.
Hi again Satnam,
In agreement with P.Puppy´s comment, and looking at your question:
“Will the Scorpio man ever relinquish control to his love – if only for a few moments?”
I just want to make sure that perhaps you may feel that it is necessary to understand that you NEED to make that distinction between Scorpio man…and Evolved Scorpio.
Without you indicating that you are actively choosing, I feel a bit worried. You probably are more blessed in that aspect, but my life experiences compelled me to share it with you.
I just love your decisions in life. You are like talking to the ocean for me.
Intriguing post SatNam.
Firstly, it’s great that you are in communion with, and feel for, a power far greater (infinite) than your personality-self ( namely- opinions, disagree, agree, right, wrong, limitation judgement, subjective filters etc..). You’re quite an aware little bunny through the context of what you wrote… inquisitive too. So I grant you a ginormous gold star for that.
For a woman in her early twenties who’s ‘not ready’ to be in a relationship with a man, I have to give you credit, your path tells me you have discovered and healed some older karmic wounds caused by men?… or wounds caused ‘by choosing’ the wrong man in the past? Karma can, looks like it has happened for you… as it has done for me… deal us a virtuous, divine hand… even through despair, even during pain and retrospective disillusionment. The demons, more so than the angels, can teach us mightily if we are brave and open in heart by seeking that resurrection. Chakra Kriya is an interesting study, it must be helping you see past the mundane lunacy and carousel of self loathing, of what and why we can become so easily influenced by… and attach ourselves to the tidal waves of image and media streams drenching our reality seen and worshiped among our “real” culture.
I’ll begin with your first curiosity:
“… Now there is one topic I do not understand. A highly evolved Scorpio needs his female love to submit to him and his masculine loving energy. Can someone describe to me how surrender can be empowering?…”
A great question, with a complex answer. “Need” is not the goal or purpose. The verb of “submit” can mean layers of energies or levels of consciousness. He ‘can help’… you submit your feminine, or yin instinctual/sexual desires to manipulate his thoughts and control his actions… he can help IF, you are in psychic dance with him, or in mutual frequency with him understanding the way you feel in each given moment, in the present, and by understanding how he feels in the moment. By mutual I mean, the subtle self-awareness to know if you are controlling him, his blind-spots out of selfish need or frustration, or whether you are aware (or conscious) of the give-n-take between man and woman no matter how painful or discomforting it may be… and to not let that exchange or manifestation “hurt” you to where you run inwardly. Hurt… is an egocentric concept… because the ego naturally attaches meaning to imagined fears… hurt also refuses, or denies the penetration of Truth within an uncomfortable exchange. When people “hurt”… what that person actually means is… “hey you deceived me… yes you burst my ego-balloon of self-importance when really… I did not see the Truth of myself in those moments within you, nor did I acknowledge the Truth of who you actually were/are (of feeling) while I was convincing myself childishly that you really weren’t that person I didn’t want to see.” Ya see?… The mirror of both our-self and “the other” was not True and One. The lie, or fear, was believed as Truth during discomfort. Why?… Because the lie feels comfortable, absorbed by superficial, unconscious levels. This vignette is massively common among human beings. It’s not the exception, it’s the game playing rule to avoid showing any vulnerability. Showing vulnerability is perceived by ego-culture as “weak”. How misguided that belief is.
Speaking of vulnerability, this manifestation is a huge part of the “submitting” process both mentally and emotionally, even sexually (more on that in a minute). So if male Scorpio proves his “high evolution” through his being, through every move and breathe with you and away from you, he is constantly – surrendering – (is the better word) his lower-self. He is in essence dying or killing his lower-desire or animal self and his manifestations of love, due to owning his vulnerability starts rising up his higher-self through higher acts of being, of feeling or loving you eternally. That transformation or essence of “being human” in a male Scorpio is natural. “He truly wants” to naturally honor the very essence of you, your goodness, your sexual feminine divinity…
… So…
When a highly evolved male being reveres you, your innocence and awakens his sexual potency… your body (the girl) does not logically choose to surrender like making a choice of what cereal you’re going to munch for breakfast. Your surrender will just happen naturally, through the intensity and sexual magnetism of his self-control and virtuous desire to honor you, ravish you gently, and make you orgasm until you have infact been transformed. In that moment of love making… the ego in him is then non-existent. Your ego is also no-existent. He has learned to dissolve all power games of personality, he has surrendered animal self-indulgence for the kinetic energy of transcendence while penetrating the woman. During this mutually divine state, she has surrendered through his divinity and sheer intensity. This folks…. is what real love making means with male Scorpio.
This event is a far cry from playful ‘fucking’. lol.
To answer your second question:
“… But I am curious as to how power plays (if it all?) in a highly evolved relationship between a Scorpio man and his female love..”
You’ve answered your own question. See the beauty of asking something? hahaha. Great stuff. Yeah, Power Plays… have no merit, no purpose in the Divine Union of bodies, Divine Union of minds, Divinity of hearts, in the Transcendence of human oneness.
Power has been exalted in a Union with the Divine.
US.
Another important follow-up point about the steamy soul breathing sex.
Gazing deeply into each others eyes, while inside her, is crucial for the intense intimacy and divine orgasm. Sensual touch and intoxicating motion of bodies need no alcoholic intake… although a drop of wine doesn’t hurt lol. The drug ladies… is nothing you can buy or inject on this earth. The drug… is the act is of literally losing your f*cking minds through the experience.
Told you it wasn’t for the faint of heart. Lol. Now all of you may understand a glimpse of why so many young women, 20s, even women in their 40s, are not in our league. Not even close. That may sound egotistical, it might be a wee bit… but it’s the truth.
I’d suggest know exactly what volcano you’re climbing into before you scream at us for burning you.
The Devil wears Wings,
Pluto
“Gazing deeply into each others eyes, while inside her, is crucial for the intense intimacy and divine orgasm.”
Which is why I love your choices Satnam…
You seem like you are cultivating spiritual living…and WAITING for THAT guy.
Here, sometimes in the metro stations, there are yoga classes offered. I love to see these things, and feel these wonderful people.
It makes you happy, fer some reason!
What an incredible perspective, Pluto Puppy. I never knew a man could feel like this. What society feels sexuality and relationships should be like is very different to this.
Thank you for the gold star. 🙂
I suppose the only “relationship” that I could have had with a man was when I was 14-15. I was friends with this guy and we had classes together. I developed a crush on him and he was the first (and only) non-relative male to hug me. We had only one hug but it was that hug that sparked something within me. A realization of what can BE between a man and a woman. When we did not see each other later, I would cry and cry. Nothing happened between us and I eventually got over it. The crush was secret and innocent. I was (still am?) innocent as I have never been kissed, taken a sip of alcohol, smoked, or had drugs to this day. But through Kundalini Yoga, I developed a sense of who I am. The Universe’s energy is within me and it gives me strength. I am more than petty relationships, shallow living, and material pursuits. I only truly “pursue” my relationship with the Divine. WITHOUT dogma, rituals, or condescension.
Reading your previous posts gives me hope that there are men who want to follow a path with the Divine. Who want to experience MORE. Who want to give every fiber of their being to exploring their self and elevating themselves. I don’t want a relationship with a man to do frivolous activities in the name of “fun”. That is okay once in a while, but it is never as fulfilling as going DEEPER.
Is this intensity? I do not know, because I am always evolving. Who knows what I will be like five years down the road? Perhaps around 25/26 is when I will be ready to commit. Scientifically speaking, our brain is still developing strong until that point. Of course, it continues for the rest of our lives but the ‘growing up’ phase ends around that time.
Something that I have learned over the years is how shallow a person can live. I started practicing this yoga 1.5 years ago as a teenager seeking for more flexibility (very shallow reason). Within that time span, I have changed so much that I am almost unable to recognize the person I used to be. I read my older journals and I am shocked at my feelings. I was envious of those who had more material possessions, who were more beautiful and fit, who had a boy love them, who knew how to dress well, and I was just in mediocre health. I’ve had a relatively conservative upbringing, so my past is definitely not as dark as perhaps many others.
Now I am free. None of that matters. When you stop reaching for such temptations of the mind, then the Universe naturally brings them to you.
For example, I wished to be more beautiful when I grew up. Now Kundalini Yoga has brought a luster and glow to my face and skin. I am aware of what I eat and what is best for me. My body has shaped beautifully and my eyes and smile sparkle as if light is shining from me. It is amazing. When you do not force anything, the Universe shines its light through you. You are blessed. I thank the Universe countless times throughout the day. I can never be more grateful for the multitude of opportunities this practice has shown me.
I am in medical school so I am in a demanding environment with type-A personalities surrounding me. Yet I am able to feel peace. I see the suffering and I see the superficiality. I do not want to choose my medical specialty based on monetary value or prestige. I want to change people’s lives by transforming their emotions and illness to LIGHT. Glorious light.
I am aware of how difficult of an undertaking this is. Time is of the essence in medical practice and drugs are indispensable. I struggle with this when I see patients are hurting. All in good time though. The Universe will show me my place and where I can serve others the best.
Gatubela,
I am unsure of your views of yoga and meditation. I think it is important to clear this misconception that yoga and meditation is passive. At least for Kundalini Yoga. The real strength in the practice is how you live your LIFE. The yoga mat is a metaphor for the real world. How do I use what I have learned? I have broken many traditions of my culture because I have found a truth that is more suited to this world. I am stubborn but only for things of value. Things worth fighting for. I have developed my own set of ethics and values. People near and dear to me have criticized me for what I believe in because it is radical compared to how they live.
For example, I do not eat solely for pleasure. I eat so there is minimal harm to animals. I eat so that my body, mind, and soul are nourished. I eat so that the earth may not be burdened with more toxic chemicals. This transformation has come from my practice. I NEVER used to care like this before.
I do not watch many television shows (except for childhood cartoons with family or educational shows), because I find them to value the lower self of humans. Sex, jealousy, appearances, snobbery, money, etc. I am beyond that. I don’t get together with friends and comment on how fat someone has become or how a girl dresses. It does NOT matter. We are all vessels of light and at different stages of our evolution. We must have grace and allow others to make mistakes. But we do not have to embody those mistakes ourselves.
When my grandfather passed away, I used this practice to work through the pain. I had never lost a dear one before. The tears and grief were ever present. After all this time, I have moved on. It was VERY hard work to process all of those emotions and all of my fears of DEATH. I am still processing through death and the cycle of life. My work on my self is never complete.
But that is the beauty of it. I will always work on this relationship. I do not wish for a Scorpio man to marry, because I believe the adage ‘Be careful of what you wish for’. My relationship with the Universe will guide me to who I am meant to be with. This energy that simmers and flows within me gives spark to my personality and my aspirations. It is ever Constant. I do not force anything and let my intuition guide me.
Hi Satnam!!!
Hmmmm…what can I say? I have used my capacity of meditation to actively battle.
I did mention that I was in the trenches. It is a different type of meditation – based on feeling my energies and feeling others. Strength is the basis and first pillar to master…However, I must strive to consciously RE-DIRECT my energies…I have learned to do this secretly, in my head, during night or at any time when people were not watching and controlling me, while doing my daily activities…while permitting myself to feel depressed, pain, sadness, and complete loss of faith and hope, to seek my answers, to do my best, to handle circumstances that were imposed on me…as my mistakes literally put me on the border line, between me wanting to die, someone wanting to really hurt me, and me struggling to live with my heart intact and hearing those angels singing. I am not an expert in this, but I sure as heck am working on it.
During these moments, I learned to eat well, combine foods, use naturopathy and natural medicine. My children were rarely sick, and when they were, they healed themselves as well, as I had taught them.
“People near and dear to me have criticized me for what I believe in because it is radical compared to how they live.”
I share your feelings on this one!!!
“But that is the beauty of it. I will always work on this relationship. I do not wish for a Scorpio man to marry, because I believe the adage ‘Be careful of what you wish for’.”
LoL!!! Perhaps you may find that you would have to braoden to different styles of meditation!!!
“… The crush was secret and innocent. I was (still am?) innocent as I have never been kissed, taken a sip of alcohol, smoked, or had drugs to this day…”
O gosh darling. The contrast of your innocence and purity of never being kissed, compared to the Lucifer-like revelations I have written here arising from my raw life experiences… is literally the metaphor of Hades abducting Persephone while she was picking flowers in the meadow. You’re an innocent baby girl, fresh, virtuous and ripe for the Underworld… even through the spirituality of your twenties. I better be careful not to entice you with any more seeds… you may just eat them!! LoL
The Shadow self not yet found (through life altering experiences) in the relationship with your personality, is what Hades virtue bestows upon your being to make it whole and real. Our creative light is one dimension of personal evolution. Light has the purpose of beaming clarity on what we are unable to see with the Light off. Being solely our inner Light throughout life… can “blind” us of our perceptions of ourselves, and from what is felt as utterly real during our Dark or Shadow periods of struggle, pain or mourning. Over a lifetime, most human beings cannot, or will not face their Shadow and free it.
“Now Kundalini Yoga has brought a luster and glow to my face and skin”
Hi again Satnam…
I just want to vioce a curiousity.
You seem to base all of your new found spirituality, in Kundalini yoga.
Can you explore internally and come up with a reason or explanation, to the possibility that perhaps it is NOT kundalini yoga that brought about these changes?
“O gosh darling. The contrast of your innocence and purity of never being kissed, compared to the Lucifer-like revelations I have written here arising from my raw life experiences… is literally the metaphor of Hades abducting Persephone while she was picking flowers in the meadow. You’re an innocent baby girl, fresh, virtuous and ripe for the Underworld… even through the spirituality of your twenties. I better be careful not to entice you with any more seeds… you may just eat them!! LoL”
I had never heard of the story of Hades and Persephone until this forum. After reading about it, I felt like I could relate to her.
By the way, you write beautifully. 🙂
Perhaps it is not possible for a ‘girl’ to truly perceive the dark forces of your nature until she is ready for that relationship? By waiting until marriage, the girl becomes a vessel of light, goodness, purity, and hope for the world and the people she changes in it. The husband has connected with his darker side and gone through his own ego struggles of a different kind than that of a girl. When they transition to become one, he transforms the girl’s journey into that of a woman.
I think the fundamental nature of a woman is different from a man. I do not think it is necessary to seek the darker temptations of the world in order to become ‘godly’. It takes strength and fortitude to build one’s character and virtues.
Perhaps some people think they are better and have fought more worthy battles because they connected with their dark side. There is more than one type of darkness. There is the darkness that causes the human nature into the lower chakras and be tied to basal desires, emotions, etc. In contrast, there is the darkness that complements pure light and lifts the souls to a transcending experience with the divine. The relationship that should be between a man and woman. The man with his experience of transforming darkness and the woman with her experience of transforming light. I believe both are equally valid, yet when they combine, their sum is greater than the individual natures.
“I think the fundamental nature of a woman is different from a man. I do not think it is necessary to seek the darker temptations of the world in order to become ‘godly’. It takes strength and fortitude to build one’s character and virtues.”
You would be in a very blessed position to not have any dark in you. And you would be bestowing a precious, divine gift your guy, but in particularly, on scorpio, if you did decide to get involved with one. One can be pure, by themselves. But two people, spiritual and all that this implies (knowing life and death and having the ability to CHOOSE these two pillars that stand before them at all times) joined and having no shadow /darkness?
Can you change you verbs “think” and “believe”? You are not doing any of these things while meditating.
Don´t mean to be a bossy cat, but I just intuitively feel that you have stronger feelings.
You don´t talk about those…and I am curious about them as well.
I feel that there is something similar between us…
I refuse to interchange the verb “think” with “believe”. I believe in something when I have EXPERIENCED it. I have not experienced this relationship as you and Pluto Puppy have. These are merely hypothetical concepts for discussion.
You can absolutely “believe” during meditation. You can believe that your energy can heal someone. You can believe that you will fight whatever is holding you back to your destiny. Meditation is a multi-faceted experience and multiple verbs can be inclusive of it.
******************
“Don´t mean to be a bossy cat, but I just intuitively feel that you have stronger feelings.
You don´t talk about those…and I am curious about them as well.
I feel that there is something similar between us…”
Hmm. What area do you feel I have stronger feelings on?
On a side note, I am still blown away from the Scorpionic nature that Pluto Puppy revealed. That desire for transcendence through union. Very powerful and very appealing. The underlying spiritual relationship as a common denominator. So much to have been exposed to and so much yet to learn. Fascinating.
“You can believe …”
Yes…I understand this. Believing for me was like having absolute faith…and trusting my life to this “belief”.
“I am still blown away from the Scorpionic nature that Pluto Puppy revealed.”
Really? Blown away?
“That desire for transcendence through union.”
It feels like that is a true and divine way of loving a person.
“But that is the beauty of it. I will always work on this relationship. I do not wish for a Scorpio man to marry, because I believe the adage ‘Be careful of what you wish for’.”
LoL!!! Perhaps you may find that you would have to braoden to different styles of meditation!!!
I do not understand the humor in that paragraph. What is funny about it? 🙂
Perhaps I was not as articulate about that concept as I needed to be. There many paths one can take on the journey of meditation. The spiritual guidance and wisdom I have received always emphasized this concept: You can dig many little holes in your brain, or you can dig one hole and keep going deeper. You can try different styles of meditation and appreciate how they affect you. Or you can choose one powerful meditation and practice it everyday for as long as you live. There are specific benefits to 40 day, 90 day, 120 day, and 1000 day meditations.
The latter evokes powerful emotions within us.
There are days when I am full of rage, hurt, and anger.
Days when I am full of grief for the ones I have lost and for the days and moments that will never be again.
Days when you ask yourself ‘What is the point of living when everything will eventually die’?
Days when you cannot comprehend the atrocities of the world and how brutal and sadistic human beings can be.
Days when you tremble at the idea that in a year or two, you will be handling life and death situations of patients.
Days that I know will come when I will kill a patient – either inevitably or by folly.
Nightmares in which I confront my deepest fears in vivid, realistic detail.
This a hint of my darkness. The meditation is not just sitting there – it combines eye focus, mantra, mudra, navel power, and pranayama.
A quote from my teachers regarding So Darshan Chakra Kriya:
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“Of all the 20 types of yoga, including Kundalini Yoga, this is the highest Kriya. This meditation cuts through all darkness. It will give you a new start. It cuts through all barriers of accumulated neuroses. This kriya invokes the Kundalini to give you the necessary vitality and intuition to combat the negative pressure of the subsconscious mind.”
“If you do this meditation for 62 minutes and ultimately 2 1/2 hours it will give you Nao Niddhi Athara Siddhi, nine precious virtues and 18 types of intutive gifts. The entire Universe is contained in these 27 facets. This purifies and pefects and will make you Saintly, successful, and second to none.
Overall this meditation will stabilize your mind, bring out the inner talents you were born to use, and help you move beyond the patterns that create obstacles to your fulfillment and success.
Here is a poem written by the 15th century poet/saint Jaidev, describing his life and Destiny changing experience with the meditation called So Darshan Chakra Kriya. This poem is included in the Siri Guru Granth which is the holy book of the Sikh tradition. It’s very rare to see a technique described so explicitly in a sacred text. It was done in this instance as a homage to this meditation.
Inhale through the lunar nostril
Suspend it in the central channel of the spine
Repeat Wahe Guru sixteen times. Exhale through the solar nostril.
My incentive is Your Will. My gifts flow from Your Power.
My unstable mind has been stabliized.
My unadorned soul has been adorned.
I drink the Ambrosial Nectar.
The Name of the Infinite One, the source of all virtue, resounds in my mind.
The blindfold darkening my inner vision has been ripped away.
Now nothing can come between us. We are the same.
I worship the One who is worthy of worship.
I trust in the One who is worthy of being trusted.
As water merges in water, I merge in the Infinite.
It’s not easy to move forward when the past is constantly tugging us back. What better time than now to, once and for all, resolve the core issues of your life and be happy. There are many amazing meditations in Kundalini Yoga, but the So Darshan Chakra Kriya Meditation is the most powerful technqiue we’ve found to help you get to it and through it, resolve the unresolved, stabilize your mind, and allow peace, calmness, clarity, creativity, and joy to permeate your life. We are stating as definitively as we can that those benefits will acquire a real dimension through the practice of this amazing technique!
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Hi Satnam…
“I do not understand the humor in that paragraph. What is funny about it?”
The humour was based on the personal experiences of an insignificant cute warrior kitty that struggled real hard and choose virtue and love.
My Samurai backround feels those meditations from a very ancient part of me.
Are you calling me an ‘insignificant cute warror kitty’?
Hi Satnam,
No…I am a leo. So, I am the kitty in this sentence.
Why do I feel these things?
Insignificant: Because I feel that my struggles, however important to me, are just a grain of sand in the ocean. The truth is, I can feel the struggles of many other people.
I remember when I fully understood this concept in my soul…Universal energy and that I was not alone – in the good and in the bad (as once seen from my dualistic perspective). That there was love, and that this was way beyond ME. It resonated in my heart and opened my mind.
I am just sharing my experiences – rather undisciplined as they are, and have absolutely no feelings of negativity. Just highly curious and wanting to understand.
“Now Kundalini Yoga has brought a luster and glow to my face and skin”
Hi again Satnam…
I just want to vioce a curiousity.
You seem to base all of your new found spirituality, in Kundalini yoga.
Can you explore internally and come up with a reason or explanation, to the possibility that perhaps it is NOT kundalini yoga that brought about these changes?”
Ah, but that is one of the true beauties of this practice. Kundalini Yoga is known as the “Yoga of Awareness”. Through this technology, the mind becomes aware of what is needed on the path to the Divine. I became aware of how to forge a new relationship with food, lifestyle habits, and compassion. My teachers, Ravi Singh and Ana Brett, state that you do not have to force a habit. Through KY, habits you do not need will eventually fall away. When they do, you have truly conquered them. Always practice and always move forward.
Countless people have echoed my experiences to say that all of the breathing and oxygen rejuvenate the tissues and organs of the body. That OXYGEN and PRANA (life force energy) flowing through you is what transforms you.
“Countless people have echoed my experiences to say that all of the breathing and oxygen rejuvenate the tissues and organs of the body. That OXYGEN and PRANA (life force energy) flowing through you is what transforms you.”
That blows me away as well. Do you have any thoughts on Chi? Like having enough energy in you, to open doors before you pass through them?
In my experience and from what I have read, Prana is equivalent to chi. The term Prana originates from India while Chi originates from East Asia.
Through So Darshan Chakra Kriya (SDCK), I have noticed some…’powers’…which I never had before. I will start a deeper practice starting 11-11-11, so I wonder where this journey will go. I was unsettled at first. I ALWAYS try to use this energy for good. Always always always.
Practitioners are always warned that Kundalini Yoga used to be a secret and ancient practice and its techniques only used to be given after mastery of the other types of yoga AND until the student was truly ready. They say that the energy and “power” must never be misused and get in the wrong hands.
I used to consider this as mumbo jumbo and just continued with a sensible practice. Now that I am EXPERIENCING this, I am almost at a loss of words. Perhaps these are the divine gifts a human being is always supposed to have? I am in the beginning of my journey and am by no means any type of a master so we shall see…
One thing Ravi and Ana emphasize is to not get caught up in the esoterics of the practice but to keep up for one true reason only: merging with the Divine. Any other special feats simply fall away in importance. We have limited time on Earth, so why not make the most of it?
I assume the possibility of opening doors is due to fields of aura and intense spiritual energy. I always say nothing is impossible in the spiritual world. However, I think it is important to guide that energy.
Instead of selfish reasons (definitely NOT implying that is yours 😉 ), why not use your prana/chi to uplift others? I choose a career of service as a doctor. I did not go into it for money or status.
I can choose to become anywhere from a family medicine practitioner ($120,000 annual salary) or neurosurgeon ($1-2 million annual salary). The ball is in my hands and my fellow classmates within a few years.
We all make decisions in life and I feel every single one is important. Sure opening doors, levitating, mind-reading, etc. is cool and impressive! But is that impressive to the Divine force? Is that making the best out of the gifts you have been so blessed with and worked hard for? That is my question for you, dear. =)
Hi Satnam,
“Sure opening doors, levitating, mind-reading, etc. is cool and impressive! But is that impressive to the Divine force? Is that making the best out of the gifts you have been so blessed with and worked hard for? That is my question for you, dear”
Actually, I did not know I had spiritual gifts…As I said, I am in the trenches still. I truly believe that I was given what was needed.
They were never my gifts Satnam, I was blessed and God was in my heart.
A quick and beautiful introduction to Kundalini Yoga by my teachers:
http://www.raviana.com/about.html
hello SatNam,
thankyou for your interesting posts and information about Kundalini Yoga. I have been practicing combinations of Vinyasa and Iyengar Yoga for the past 15 years. Yoga is wonderful and I agree so very healing, for the body and mind and spirit. It calms me and centers me,quietens my mind and through breathing and movement allows me to be in the present moment, which in that moment is free of fears of future or past, of death and loss, anger ,sadness and frustration.. all those emotions seem to just fall away. I find my body is more able to relax into meditation after it has moved and stretched as well.Blood in the bum so not numb!
The constant natural rhythm of breathing and everything circulating it is very cyclical and in that so simple essence of being I can then feel connected in a more true and pure way so the nature of life and death without all the attachments.
And yes all that oxygen it does make the skin and eyes glow!
On thing I want to say about surrender is that it is an energetic thing and it is the same as what you feel in yourself to what you experience with the man of your choice. By what you are practicing in yoga you are already surrendering.Empowerment is not so much about power in yourself , more to letting go of ego and more being connected to the whole. hence it is more about the journey rather than being stuck in a certain state of being. If completely true to the moment then the word ceases to exist.
Umm
Hi Umm! (hehe)
Wow, your practice sounds beautiful! I am glad Yoga has been healing for your journey as well. What drew you to a yoga practice? 🙂
Your views of surrender and empowerment….make sense. This is great food for thought and I will ponder on this.
If you have any questions or discussion about Kundalini Yoga or yoga in general, please bring them up!
-SatNam (Means “The truth within you”)
Hi SatNam,
I was drawn to yoga as it was a way to gently stretch my body in a holistic way. I wanted to be flexible and then like you i came to experience all the other benefits.
I like your name.Are you of asian origin?
Umm
No umm, it is not my real name. Thank you anyway! It is a KY mantra – inhale think ‘Sat’ and exhale think ‘Nam’ for everything.
My real name is unique but could be used for identification so I do not share it.
“I am still blown away from the Scorpionic nature that Pluto Puppy revealed.”
Really? Blown away?”
Yes, I really am blown away! When I was first explored all the astrology signs briefly, I kept encountering very stereotypical information about Scorpio men. People would write that they are sex-starved, ruthless, jealous, dominating, cheaters, and very angry individuals. As I was passing by them in the zodiac, I couldn’t fathom them liking a girl like me? What would a sex-obsessed man want with a virginal and pure girl besides the conquest? How can they expect sexual variety from a girl with no experience – who will anyways wait until marriage.
This girl does not want sex to be taken lightly. I feel it is more than tension-relieving, procreating, and obligation. I have read in Yoga literature, that regular sex is very energy-depleting and zaps some of our creative cosmic energy each time (especially when the man releases his ‘seed’). Through techniques and varied methods of love-making, sex can be a lifting and transcendental experience.
Nobody knows I have even thought about this except for some snippets I have revealed to my sister. I didn’t know other men could believe in something like this. That there were men who wanted MORE than the typical relationships that are prevalent in society.
Pluto Puppy’s descriptions sound so beautiful. I am so young in terms of life experience compared to the both of you, so I truly thought I was alone in these thought processes.
Elders advise that sex is not super important in a relationship as compared to other values, character, communication, shared goals, tolerance, compromise, etc. I completely understand how important those qualities are. But I feel there are two ways to live one’s life: a mundane ‘happy’ run-of-the-mill life, and a soul-searching, mind-probing, inhibition-leaving life.
I choose the latter.
Perhaps it is in my personality? I have a very driven nature. In terms of my education, ever since I was a toddler I have been drawn to intense, demanding educational programs. Nothing has been normal per se, but always moving and working hard to the top (never to undermine others of course – I’m encouraging and helping others as we move on this journey together). And I LOVE it. I am very passionate about it.
I bring that passion to everything I do. I desire with all my heart to bring it to the man I will marry one day.
Sometimes I wonder if a man even exists like this. Sometimes I tell myself I won’t marry if there is no one who drives himself deeply in life along with the important characteristics the Elders mention. Then I read things like these in my chart:
Mars in Eighth House:
“The Eighth House is where a person is purified and cleansed through an intense meeting with another. It is the area of sexuality and of death. This can be a metaphorical death of the personal self and often this occurs by the deep merging of two people where the self is lost. There is nothing shallow about this house. Everything is felt with an intensity and depth and this is both the good and bad sides of human nature. There can often be a deep crisis that causes a person to be purged of their negativity. This crisis could show itself in the form of jealousy or rage or hate or possesiveness. Whatever can be said about this House the areas it highlights are never superficial. The life processes are felt intensely here, things such as the birth of a child , or the death of a friend, or the passion involved in wanting to be close to another. This is the area where a person will give everything in order to possess their desires.”
“With Mars in the eighth house, shades of the sign Scorpio can be found in your desire nature. You may not experience true passion until later in life, but when you do, it is magical and infectious. You have some fears of betrayal and loss that compromise your trust from time to time.”
I just pray and continue to live a life of virtue and treating everyone with respect. No bad karma. I let go of control and hopefully one day the dots will connect. I am still going to live my life to the fullest!!
Hi Satnam!!!
“Yes, I really am blown away! When I was first explored all the astrology signs briefly, I kept encountering very stereotypical information about Scorpio men. People would write that they are sex-starved, ruthless, jealous, dominating, cheaters, and very angry individuals.”
Well, I am glad that you have decided to understand this energy, instead of believing the hype. You decide to get into these waters or you don´t. Each of these characteristics that you mention, are actually “pathes” to a higher state of being. Meaning, you must always go to the source of it. And in particular, to the man of your interest. Without soulfully feeling his uniqueness, you will fall into what most of these stereotypes. There is never any understanding in these generalizations, and especially with Scorpio. To go on a more profound level, your man (we will talk about scorpio and not what the universe may have in store for you, since we are in this forum), will have his own ideas about how “it” should be. LoL!!! These ideas will also be “penetrated” into you and the dynamic to be transformed.
“As I was passing by them in the zodiac, I couldn’t fathom them liking a girl like me? What would a sex-obsessed man want with a virginal and pure girl besides the conquest? How can they expect sexual variety from a girl with no experience – who will anyways wait until marriage.”
For me, being virginal and pure, is a state of being – Maybe most Scorpio guys would enjoy a good romp in the meadow with a sexy nymph. LoL!!! But, when you honour a guy, and see him for his soul, these energies can literally touch your own heart in resonance. You must distinguish between soul and shadow – they are not the same.
Virginal and pure, HERE, in the known, has a different effect in the UNKNOWN. What that difference is, is something that each woman has to feel inside her. So, for me, this is not exactly related to sex. At this moment, you seem so sure on your path. But with scorpionic energy, this will be dismantled over and over again. A harsh example, feeling God in your heart – virginal and pure, and then having to recover after a rape, or a beating or being forced to eat your food from the floor like a dog, because you spilt some milk. Or for a man, that has been on a path of drinking and delinquincy? What can be offered to these people, who have lost this beautiful state of being? Scorpionic energy deals with these journeys.
I don´t mean to compare my experiences to yours, as my whole being strives to prevent these things from happening to anybody. I feel that people like you, are what I truly wish for this world.
“This girl does not want sex to be taken lightly. I feel it is more than tension-relieving, procreating, and obligation. I have read in Yoga literature, that regular sex is very energy-depleting and zaps some of our creative cosmic energy each time (especially when the man releases his ‘seed’). Through techniques and varied methods of love-making, sex can be a lifting and transcendental experience”.
Well…I would agree with you. But I will put it in a softer way. It is the guy that is important. I am not an expert…(blushing)…I have used my energy for other things as well, without the training. I was self trained…so I screwed up alot. You are doing it much better. But in a sense, if you do not divinely love the guy, you will miss his soul completely. To wait for that and feel it…I imagine must be one of the most beautiful experiences out there.
Well, the thing is, most women do not value a man´s seed. They don´t love it and treasure it. An idea of this is how women react to their children. Have you felt their pride, in the father´s contribution? I mean soulful pride and love? I have not. Usually, the relationship turns out to petty fighting over domestic issues related to children.
You won´t feel any of these things, if you are prioritizing anything…the transcedence aspect is found in unconditional love for him, and in loving yourself.
“That there were men who wanted MORE than the typical relationships that are prevalent in society.”
Women should really learn to honour the divine and feel inside her, what it means to honour him and prioritize his growth and soul.
Pluto Puppy’s descriptions sound so beautiful. I am so young in terms of life experience compared to the both of you, so I truly thought I was alone in these thought processes.
You don´t want my experiences!!! I have shared them in the hopes that they can be of use to others! You are not alone…not at all! I hope that I can offer the possibility of making you feel that. And to tell you the truth, I don´t feel alone in being able to share with you. It feels good!
But I feel there are two ways to live one’s life: a mundane ‘happy’ run-of-the-mill life, and a soul-searching, mind-probing, inhibition-leaving life.
Am trying to feel that….I hope that our comments here can serve on your journey!!! They were given with a lot of love, heart and soul.
“I just pray and continue to live a life of virtue and treating everyone with respect. No bad karma. I let go of control and hopefully one day the dots will connect. I am still going to live my life to the fullest!!”
Feel that energy in you….it is alot better than that “regular, obligational “stuff that you mentioned previously.
” Perhaps it is not possible for a ‘girl’ to truly perceive the dark forces of your nature until she is ready for that relationship? By waiting until marriage, the girl becomes a vessel of light, goodness, purity, and hope for the world and the people she changes in it. The husband has connected with his darker side and gone through his own ego struggles of a different kind than that of a girl. When they transition to become one, he transforms the girl’s journey into that of a woman…”
Probably the most enlightened piece of consciousness I have seen in my entire life travels, from none other than a twenty something girl. Superb.
You definitely weren’t raised like an abused orphan, like I had been… or were you??… May I ask if you are close and loving in relationship with your father? Do you know him well? Is he a man of honor, and do you appreciate and respect him?… Another tender question… was there abuse which triggered your search for divine truth and meaning? … Hope I’m not probing too deeply?… I just find your level of understanding highly unique and soulful for a girl of your life experience thus far.
When I speak with girls casually around your age, even older ones in their thirties, these subjects are never discussed. Ever. It’s true. When I have attempted to probe a younger woman for the intent to learn if she desires understanding of her higher-self, or renewal of her limiting-self… especially when her personality crumbles and projects insecurity … the conversation concerning these topics can’t speak beyond the addiction to Prada, or the cuteness of Victoria’s Secret shopping or the tastiness of her Non-Fat Mocha-Java, Honeycomb Latte??… So this example, in quickly learning about her “truth”, I empathize and withdraw my true-self, coddling her outspoken fears so she won’t flip or run. I know she doesn’t trust me enough to go there, but I also know she can’t trust her own fears for what they really are. She is essentially running from herself. Hence the former dynamics you may have seen here between me and an innocent bratty girl on the forum.
Out in real social environments, I spiritually feel I have an intense social and moral responsibility and obligation to protect these girls from the nastiness of immoral, heartless males who blatantly objectify the sexual divinity and love-energy of women. Their misogynist intentions knowingly abuse the rights of girls who repeatedly fall for that material/image worship and temptation. This type of thing has been happening for millennia. Girls such as this, play along with the game men initiate in fears for maintaining social, material/survival needs and comforts. I just seethe at the cruel injustices of what people are capable of doing with each other, male and female. They’re asleep and fearful of everything.
Yes a virtuous young woman waits until after marriage. Wow, I’m not even “religious” in terms of obeying dogmatic rules, but through deeper reflection, the sanctity of marriage is surely what I would want first if I met a special woman who knows my soul like no other. The sex would be transcendental in that instance. Love wouldn’t be forced or discovered through the known world we are both apart of. Love and orgasm in that vessel, would become through the being of a unifying energy in mind, heart and soul. The base or emotional sex chakra would rise-up through divine sexuality, purging light through the heart and crown chakra’s, and through the third eye chakra.
The state of breathing in the present of the third eye chakra can be manifested in daily living. I’ve only been to one yoga “class” in my entire life. So I soon discovered that being in this state, or relationship with the divine, was an ordained energy in me at birth.
Thank you for your kind words, Pluto Puppy.
I am sorry that you started your life in such circumstances. I would never want to wish that upon anyone. I see that you have made the most of your experiences and must have undergone amazing transformations and soul-reaching. Incredible.
I have to admit – I have had a beautiful childhood. I must have reaped good karma in my past lives. My parents have been together for almost 25 years (*touch wood* hehe) and are loving, supporting, role models. My father is very honorable. Both parents did not have previous relationships when they married. None of us drink, smoke, partake of drugs, etc. They taught me not be envious, to control the source of anger, to have patience and tolerance, and to have faith that good intentions will lead to good outcomes. Also they wanted to give me the best education possible so I could stand on my own two feet as a woman and have my own passions and interests.
Please understand that I am not bragging but sharing. I thank the Divine everyday. Everyday.
I sometimes wonder that it is no coincidence that they both practice Hatha yoga everyday and are spiritual. Their spirituality is very different compared to mine, but we have common grounds.
It is ironic that I was never spiritual when I was growing up. I didn’t like rituals of practice or believed in the Divine because I used LOGIC. Logic has no place here.
It was after a semester in college that I had this sudden intuition. I needed MORE. I searched the library website and found out the RaviAna Kundalini Yoga DVDs had good reviews. I don’t know why I was so drawn to it, but I had this inkling that I needed to try it. I needed a change.
After my first session, something changed forever. After ONE session I made the decision that I would practice this EVERY SINGLE DAY for the rest of my life! (I told you I am determined and passionate for what I care for! lol)
And therein began my journey.
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As far as your conversation topics with other women. I admit that very few people know I practice KY beyond my inner circle of friends. I think they can sense my energy as one can emanate peace and magnetism. Many of us do not make time for deep conversations because we are focused on our careers and family. It is hard to converse with someone if they do not share that intensity and soul-searching as you have stated before. I share it with my sister, but hopefully one day I can include my husband.
Wow, those topics they mention sound very distasteful to me. I have no interest in any of that. I enjoy dressing well but I do not care for obsession of brands. Food is important to me because I am an aspiring vegan. Anything with ethics and values can become great fodder for conversations. I do not judge those who eat differently, but I would love to converse with people who have open minds.
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You may or may not care, but I will share with you how I reached that “consciousness” about the act of sex. One thing my parents did not do is REALLY tell me what sex was. They evaded the topic – and I think it was because they didn’t want to corrupt me. It is one thing to know about the atrocities of the world, but sexual energy is very powerful.
I was determined to find out, and by age 15 I had enough. I Googled what sex was.
Horrified.
“How could my parents do this? Why would a girl want that? How can that even FEEL good? Do I ever want that? Isn’t that embarrassing?” etc.
I have a gone a long ways since then. hahaha
Of course, pornographic images came up. This piqued my curiosity because it was so different. Very naive. I learned a bit this way, but felt gross seeing it. After a bit of time, I decided to stop and had enough. Never went back.
Over the years, my views of sex kept refining. I found out how important and sacred this act can be. My parents don’t value sex beyond procreation – Virgo man anyone? lol They are happy without it and its risks, and I can truly sense this.
As you can see, there is a constant battle within me. I think my parents would be shocked if they knew I had a ‘consciousness’ as you found to be so unique.
I am who I am. *shrugs*
” My parents don’t value sex beyond procreation”
I am trying to feel your parents….
Is is because they are loving eachother all the time, through their feeling the divine in their hearts and being?
It is like something else speaks to them…through their loving energies.?
Good question. I know my mother feels that indulgence in sexual activity is for lower minds and those who are still intertwined in the sensual pleasures of the world. And there is always a chance of becoming pregnant again.
They never fight. When they argue, it is with respect. My parents try to emphasize that there are many factors in a relationship that preside importance over sexual love. I don’t think I fully agree, and this is something I’m working on.
They have a deep love for family and the Divine. They spend a lot of time together. My Mom is very proud of my Dad and they support each other in everything.
It’s a different concept, is it not?
“.. I am sorry that you started your life in such circumstances. I would never want to wish that upon anyone….”
No sympathy needed. I am not with shame or regret for the path a higher power planned for me. I am not for sympathy or sadness to revive my ego illusions and comfort any lies. The path, including all obstacles transformed on that path thus far, are revered as a true blessing.
Every moment of my life, in this state of seeing and feeling is cherished. When I walk each day, I breathe with the Divine, I talk to my True Father and Mother. I meet them with love, I feel them with love each day I look up into the Universe. Every struggle is a blessing, because every struggle is met with bravery and willpower. If there is one main characteristic missing among mortal breaths… it is that of bravery.
Without bravery and powerful will, we can never shatter the creations of who we think we are among the madness of this society.
Btw, SatNam… I know you were not sympathizing, you were empathizing.
Thank you.
This psychology of this song symbolizes our societies ideas of egocentric love and hurt. This expression, the psychology underneath the idea of love, is sent through this song sans a brave relationship with knowledge of our Dark (or Unseen demons), yet the idea of this love song is drawn to the temptation, indulgence and vice of false-love. Common stuff. It presents a classic paradigm of what I’ve described over the years here relative to the vices of egocentric love, the veil of deceiving of-self, and ones consequent despair and limitation in that bubble of false-love. This song represents our collective cultural acceptance of what people “think” love is out there. Listen carefully to the lyrics for understanding of it’s meaning. This song, as one example of many in pop culture, is shows us the tiny ego balloon in which man and woman stagnate, in which they swim naively through disillusioned (imagined) fears of who they are. No spiritual power is known beyond self, nor applied in this relationship of love. Yet the masses identify with such an expression and eat-it-up as if it were… “real”.
What song are you referring to, Pluto Puppy?
By the way, I hope no one was offended by what I previously wrote. Those were not my intentions.
Oops! There was a large blank space before, but I can see the video now after reloading the page.
Interesting perspective in the video. I think we should ‘fall in love’ in a ‘Divine space’. Any ‘hurt’ in a relationship would bring us higher as a couple, because we would fight whatever was holding backing in our psyche and ego. That transformation and struggle should go deeper into issues that *actually* hold back our soul evolution.
We should not hurt because of power, jealousy, anger, possessiveness, (e.g. tattooing ‘mine’ on the girl’s body) petty fights, or commitment issues. Constantly working on a relationship with the Divine BEFORE entering a relationship helps resolve those “issues” of the mind. Any residual issues should be worked out in a loving and understanding framework.
I don’t consider the scenarios portrayed in the video as ‘love’. Even though love has many manifestations, they are attempting to describe love between a man and a woman. That love is sacred and should run DEEP.
Having never been in a relationship, am I being too idealistic? I’m not talking about romance or pleasures – because in the end – those are also figments of our imagination. True love is like our love for the Divine/true Energy Source. Never wavering…ever present…intensely felt…always probing and exploring…the pleasure is pure and never corrupted like the video shows. (Is this like Persephone? lol)
Reading over what I have analyzed, I feel at peace but also a little discouraged. I think to myself: “Am I asking too much of one person?”
Hi young lady,
No, you’re not over analyzing sweetheart. Your idealism is grounded and discerning and you are aware of Soul in the Universal unfolding of causes and events. You understand cause and effect within us and beyond us.
You’re wanting MORE from this crazy existence remember? Nothing terrible about wanting that. Persephone is adorable because her purity doesn’t really know what “more” means in her existence… which is what the philosophical purpose of why Hades abducted and raped her of her innocence in the first place. Your convictions are you. We are our convictions. That’s WHO we manifest through our deeds… IF we are conscious and mindful of divinity in everything and everyone. By leaving yourself open to assimilating forces which are flowing through you.. we learn. We learn by staying present and knowing the difference of when we are not being in the present with God.
Nothing is ‘wrong’ or tainted in having… or being… and wanting high standards in life. We should never let family or friends or associates tell us we need to lower our standards and have some fun to suit there ignorance or baseless influence. I can tell you have become beautiful inside, because you individualized your heart, your awareness and your soul. You are applying the higher mind of personal and universal discernment in the present, such as now while we are talking. I praise the fact you embody and demonstrate righteous values for humanitarian purpose. We both share a lot of similar Light. For you as soulful being realize that a True and Powerful love is earned amid all challenges life throws at us. You realize real loving and living boldly is earned through thick ‘n’ thin and it’s fought for courageously at the glaring risk of personal loss… Irreversible loss. Hence having the wisdom to Let Go. Experiencing the dark manifestations of petty and afraid ego desire, selfish desire, for the sake of feeding ones weak and low animal desires, the 5 senses… like the one displayed in that video… is the collective ground perception of cursed Darkness, where nothing else in our being is seen or transformed. It’s invisible !! It’s a seductive trap. The pressures to conform to the goal/game of “success” in this world, is to look cool, is to look different, is to gain social approval and admiration, is to feel special in the eyes of loved ones, make mom and dad proud, is to remind the partner and anyone else desiring to included themselves in the “excitement” of that relationship or career or jaunt.
Superficiality is insidious in people, their reality, it has our socioeconomic way of living and perceiving by the balls. From our governments to our education systems and among families. Through the filters of superficial, shallow personality- Class is prejudged. Economic level is prejudged. Race is prejudged. Education is prejudged. Physical appearance is prejudged. Intelligence is prejudged. Sexual orientation is prejudged. Even geographical areas of residence are prejudged. They Separated as us vs them so each divisive party can urinate on it’s attachment to territory. Primitive stuff yeah.
Yet, the immense hypocrisy manifested behind these truths, is one where people will say one thing, yet believe in another… and yet do another. Then.. after all of that game playing… one will point the blame of ones deceit at the other person involved. Hypocrisy doesn’t comprehend what is true and what is a lie. It just devours humanity by cleverly manipulating the present for self-interest. Superficial networking is blind on many levels. People rarely say what they mean, because that would mean they would have to deliver a deed which is individualized and brave against an environmental pattern of tradition, dogmas and social fears. The game is not a game if one shows their open honesty. Integrity is the “humanness” behind every word spoken. To Be.
You’re light years ahead of this dysfunction baby, because you understand the distinction of what is imagined reality and what is divine reality.
I’m blushing, Pluto Puppy. That is the first time anyone has ever said that about me. You have charm and wisdom.
I sincerely hope you understand how your contributions (and others additions) to this forum have opened my eyes. I try to find lessons in everything and tailor it to my journey.
Before I found this forum, I still believed in a spiritual and true love as vital to a partnership. But after reading your comments over the days, I’ve realized the raw and transformative power of love. The concept that a man does not have to be shy and/or passive in life or relationships to form a long-lasting spiritual bond with a woman. You give me hope. I’ve learned that I want a man in the future who seizes control of his spiritual destiny, yet relinquishes the reins to the Divine.
You have mentioned how you have not found meaningful spiritual relations or conversations with women – correct me if I am wrong. What have your experiences been with other Scorpio men? Men of other astrological signs?
Are you at a stage in which you still seek the transforming powers of a relationship with a woman or have you decided to partake of another path? Maybe you have other passions in which you direct your life force energy?
Blush away little lady, this puppy will lick your glowing face all day long, Lol.
“..You have mentioned how you have not found meaningful spiritual relations or conversations with women – correct me if I am wrong…”
Yes I have found spiritual meaning with women. You can see and feel examples of that happiness and edgy mind intensity here on the forum. Your energy, the feminine allure fills my soul with love. There of course has been ugly moments in my relating functions with women, but hey… I hope they’ve been constructive demolitions after the shrapnel has finally settled. People from all walks of life have taught me much on a spiritual plane. I see/feel past the personality quackery of others, into their subconscious core. I’ve evolved from these relative dynamics to see the goodness or godliness in the most shallow manifestations of people. We are all human regardless, so I probably identify more virtue in our faults and foibles than I do with our creative gifts. Maybe I see it evenly… dark and light.
I have talked about friendships with male Scorpios throughout my life here on the forum. I’ve noticed we are all autonomous, purposeful and strong in what we stand for. At least we stand up for something. Some male Scorpios I have known are perhaps a little bit more diplomatic and flexible than I could or should be. We all have a deeper interest in power in it’s many capacities. We are involved in one stage or another with what power is in the real world besides money and the leverage that power yields over others. The power we are within, is more so an intangible power of immaculate self-control, self-discipline and love. Acting sloppy or needy for love and admiration doesn’t make us feel powerful. Self-containment of the divine, the intense energy of the divine within us is explored and examined deeply. I specifically enjoy learning about the human condition and the ‘why’ beneath all choices and manifestations. There is tremendous fulfillment in being our own authority while surrendering to ego vices for the motivations to control another’s mind or response to us.
I will say though… that many male Scorpios who I have known haven’t necessarily changed (or died) and became someone higher, or virtuous. Meaning many male Scorpios are just as prone to hunting women from the base chakra level only. Thinking of lustful pursuits and not much else. The pursuit of female conquest, by means of material leverage and power in their careers or tangible successes. That base level of male Scorpio, regardless of how “intelligent” or “successful” he is in occupation, still functions from the unconscious animal desire level, or sensual levels of satisfying the five senses only. That reality of male Scorpio can be very manipulative for hidden selfish means… which means he does not really know himself in Truth… or care to know his darker Truth-self. He just wants what he wants with no real spiritual conscience of the abuse he is causing to others and himself. That puppeteer behavior… I have found… is much more evident in my deeper experiences with female Scorpio nature. Female Scorpio behavior understands (like the males) the sheer power of sex, or the trump card of sexuality. Female Scorpio’s tend not to know, nor understand the controlling destruction they can create by abusing that sexual energy with men or the males who they know they can control in order to feel utterly safe, coddled, worshiped and secure in the dynamics of a relationship. The female Scorpio nature, in my life ventures, does not understand the power of surrendering her interior neurosis and sexual prowess or knowledge for a level of being which is so much higher than material (seen) power. The males are more concerned with intangible power and tapping into rich hidden resources that can be manifested with consciousness. They seem to care and want to know inward answers much more so than the female Scorpio cares to know or understand. As mentioned many times here in the past… it all boils down to intrinsic motivation. Love??… or Manipulation??… The virtue which separates the two is Godly intent.
The people who have entered and exited my life… have all taught me something important. That’s mostly because I’m a soul seeker by nature. Learning can be found in every person we cross, if we are open, inquisitive, brave and empathetic enough to see and feel the God underneath that human being’s personality. Remember this is done by bypassing anything superficial (or seen) in ones presentation to the world.
I would love to meet the woman who I feel hasn’t existed thus far. I’m not holding my breath and I don’t “need” that divine female presence to be happy or at one with myself. My completion is at One with the Source. I’ve already accomplished the wholeness and supremacy of Love within me first, that includes tornado style love and every natural disaster in between. I have found through experience, all women share many similar gentle energies, nurturing qualities, loving and sexy characteristics… but I suppose the truth is no woman, especially the real sexy and beautiful ones I have known, have actually challenged my hidden mind/soul presence or intensity. A challenge is commonly very scary for a pretty woman who is used to men drooling over them. I’m not wishy-washy or taken in by the power of a sexually attractive woman. I’m too aware to let that desire control my life choices. Those little darlings all want similar things in life such as a nice and caring guy who has a good occupation, nice things and money to flaunt for prestige, she cares if he is mildly good looking, a guy who is close with his family, who “likes to have fun” under the sun… and most importantly… she requires comfort, super coziness with that “nice” and ordinary type of guy, so he does not overwhelm her zones. She wants to be the boss, but never admits this reality to anyone. Other women care only for his looks and happiness, and if he has a big dong. Women subtly know how to manipulate the male sex brilliantly, much more so than a male knows or even cares to control her through his money leverage or social popularity. Women change nice, passive guys into even weaker specimens once the relationship goes breezy and super comfortable for her. She then pulls the Aphrodite heart-strings to get what she wants each day as most guys are simply too happy to accommodate her complaints or indifferent blahs. He bows to her out of passive fear she could use her feminine powers and attract some other guy. And not because he strong, or whole and lovable as his own man. Big difference there.
” Are you at a stage in which you still seek the transforming powers of a relationship with a woman…”
Yes I am at that stage. Shall we set the marriage for Spring 2015? Lol… I’ve already got the white horse and chariot arranged for us upon entry to the quaint little chapel nestled high-up on a lush green hilltop. I’ll be wearing black, you’ll be so delicious wearing white… then we’ll kiss and make the earth stop spinning on it’s axis for a minute. We’re going to make beautiful music together, LoL.
You had mentioned you have Mars in the 8th house, is that right?… So do I, my Mars is in Scorpio + the 8th house. The eighth house is quite a stew of intensely powerful, HIDDEN energies… especially when the Warrior King (Mars) sits in there. My Venus is in Capricorn, in the 11th house of Public Perception, Friends, Connections and Hopes and Wishes.
Can you tell me where your Venus and Pluto is positioned? If you like, you can send me your birth data including time of birth, I’d love to see specifically what your charts tells me.
Hi Satnam,
“We should not hurt because of power, jealousy, anger, possessiveness, (e.g. tattooing ‘mine’ on the girl’s body) petty fights, or commitment issues. Constantly working on a relationship with the Divine BEFORE entering a relationship helps resolve those “issues” of the mind. Any residual issues should be worked out in a loving and understanding framework.”
Welllllll….we are talking about Scorpionic energy here. There won´t be any rules Satnam! There is only you and him…This is what it means to loose ego. You will loose the “good” and the “bad”…in order to form a merged “good” and “bad”. I used “good and bad, for lack of a better term. Whether you realize it or not, you have “judgements” on what it is. When you in front of your man, so does he. These slight disalignments, will be intensely felt as none of us are perfect.
So what is bonding and becoming ONE then?
In my experiences, there has not been a formula in dealing with our hurts and boo boos. I feel that yes, we should hurt…and not run away from these emotions. But we have to know how to resolve these on our own…it should not matter if the dynamic is loving or understanding. What should matter is that we can perceive the “roots” of each others behavior and soulfully deal with it. Why put a limit on what that entails…?
We would loose an aspect of compassion…forgiveness…and what it means to love.
We may not be objective enough in order to provide this love and understanding, because two people are bonding and loosing their Egos. So, it is most likely to be confusing and wierd for the both of them. Hence we must know what it means to “fight” for our divine state of being and why P.Puppy mentions that we must understand our own darkness. In these “unknown” states, we learn to handle what it feels to “not know”…and the feeling of not knowing, feels rather “dark”.
What is important is who you are, and what you stand for. I have felt that working on our relationship with the Divine, is important, but does not necessarily prevent deeper issues from emerging. It depends on the decisions you make and your communion with your own energies. You have to listen to that! There is a dynamic of “flow” which permits you to feel what must be done. In my experiences, receiving the criticism of people disagreeing to your life style, will feel like a walk in the park compared to “doing what has to be done”…because you love.
Hi again Satnam,
My struggles have been more akin to this song.
“Through the dark…can you hear me calling….?”
“Welllllll….we are talking about Scorpionic energy here. There won´t be any rules Satnam! There is only you and him…This is what it means to loose ego. You will loose the “good” and the “bad”…in order to form a merged “good” and “bad”. I used “good and bad, for lack of a better term. Whether you realize it or not, you have “judgements” on what it is. When you in front of your man, so does he. These slight disalignments, will be intensely felt as none of us are perfect.”
I love your input as it makes me think and grow. There are innate personality characteristics in each of us. After all, this is why we are human and not merged Consciousness. A relationship seems like it really stretches our growth and awareness via patience, compassion, tolerance, and communication.
“We would loose an aspect of compassion…forgiveness…and what it means to love…
We may not be objective enough in order to provide this love and understanding, because two people are bonding and loosing their Egos. So, it is most likely to be confusing and wierd for the both of them. Hence we must know what it means to “fight” for our divine state of being and why P.Puppy mentions that we must understand our own darkness…”
That makes a lot of sense. Thank you for sharing your perspective.
“In my experiences, receiving the criticism of people disagreeing to your life style, will feel like a walk in the park compared to “doing what has to be done”…because you love.”
That is what my mother always advises me about. What you need to do because you love someone. That is true love. She gives me examples, and they give me immense respect for what it takes to build a true relationship over decades.
What a beautiful cocoon you have envisioned. Our love would be legendary: Virgo lady and Scorpio man. You wouldn’t happen to have some pomegranate seeds in your silk-lined pockets, would you Pluto Puppy? lol
I’ve always appreciated the color black on certain men. I love the masculine energy that emanates from that color.
I have Venus in Leo and Pluto in Scorpio. 😉 I think you would be interested to know that analyses reveal Pluto specifically to be dominant in my chart.
Where is your e-mail address? I can send you some information, but I will edit out certain details for my safety.
“Your energy, the feminine allure fills my soul with love…”
This is so tender. Even Pluto needs sweet love.
“I will say though…that many male Scorpios who I have known haven’t necessarily changed (or died) and become someone higher, or virtuous…”
My best friend is dating a Scorpio. I was unaware of his sign until recently, but I saw potential in him. He was fascinated by my lifestyle and choices – especially yoga and how to partake of food. The three of us have practiced KY together a couple of times.
I can see his inner battle regarding sexuality and spirituality – especially through what my dear friend relates to me. I pray for him, because I feel this journey will be arduous and demanding.
I understand your point of view about Scorpio women. I have a Scorpio friend whom I got to know for a year before she moved away. She is now a world traveler, artist, and a sweet, dynamic lady with diverse passions. I did witness her reactions through a breakup and through a relationship in which her boyfriend cheated on her.
It was not pretty.
I would love to see her again one day, because she affected my life positively. We keep in touch sometimes. She has a vibrant and open way of living, but I am unaware of her spirituality. She keeps it under wraps.
“Learning can be found in every person we cross, if we are open, inquisitive, brave and empathetic enough to see and feel the God underneath that human being’s personality. Remember this is done by bypassing anything superficial (or seen) in ones presentation to the world…”
Are you reading my soul? Somehow you articulate exactly what I feel deep within me.
“I would love to meet the woman who I feel hasn’t existed thus far. I’m not holding my breath and I don’t “need” that divine female presence to be happy or at one with myself. My completion is at One with the Source.”
You cannot give me hope yet not expect it for yourself, Pluto Puppy. I will include you in my prayers, if you do not mind. A man with such emotional integrity and warrior spirit deserves a ‘divine female presence.’ Perhaps that woman cannot reach you because your aura/arc line contains energy from your previous relationships with other women? I wish for you to have a love so achingly beautiful…
“…What a beautiful cocoon you have envisioned…”
The cocoon I envision is as eternal as the universe. Not bound to form.
“..Are you reading my soul…?”
Yes, pretty cool huh? Imagine what I read in the present when people are near.
“… I would love to see her again one day, because she affected my life positively. We keep in touch sometimes. She has a vibrant and open way of living, but I am unaware of her spirituality. She keeps it under wraps.
Spirituality is the verb of who we are, not just the doctrines and ideas we memorize and talk about. Female Scorpios are great with other women, I see it all the time.
“…I will include you in my prayers, if you do not mind…”
No I don’t mind innocent one. But you need not pray for me if praying arises from energies of fear you feel, because I live my prayers each awake second, through each soulful breath. We are the prayer. We experience the profound message of BEING it. Not talking to it. I personally don’t structure time for prayer. I have a purpose for that choice. The voice of the Divine reaches me through struggle and love and every other emotion. I don’t ever seek answers from a noun outside of my molecular body. But I do “see” personal events and circumstances (positive and negative) as the Divine’s message to me occurs in the present FEELING. Traditional “Praying” can take our minds way outside the present vortex and into realms of imagined pasts and future experiences. When we are not breathing through Gods mind, the present is forever elusive and personality bound.
Never mind about the birth info. I know enough.
“The cocoon I envision is as eternal as the universe. Not bound to form.”
Forgive me, but I do not understand.
“Spirituality is the verb of who we are, not just the doctrines and ideas we memorize and talk about…”
You are correct. Though sometimes the actions can be correlated with ego pleasures and spontaneity rather than spiritual intuition.
“I personally don’t structure time for prayer”
“I don’t ever seek answers from a noun outside of my molecular body.Traditional “Praying” can take our minds way outside the present vortex and into realms of imagined pasts and future experiences. When we are not breathing through Gods mind, the present is forever elusive and personality bound…”
Praying keeps me grounded and humble. There is more to the world than how I feel and live. I pray because there is so much suffering in the world. Some of it is self-induced but some is not. I formulate a specific prayer for everything – and I will for you. Sometimes it is not enough to only work on ourselves, and I feel a calling to uplift others in this dark world. For example, volunteering to heal the homeless and less privileged: giving them eye sight, human touch and concern, and means to have a better existence. I have so much love within me, and I suppose this emotion is intensified (as every emotion) because of my moon square pluto and other squares.
The science of consciousness as exemplified by the Bhagavad Gita inspires me. From a culture of countless saints and sages, I believe this piece of advise: “Develop Your spirituality using the experience of someone who has gone through that process and reached the final goal”. I personalize it to my karma and my ego struggles. It works for me and it works fast.
You have taken your own path and harnessed your life force energy to reach a level of consciousness. That is a valid path as well. Perhaps your karma presented itself in such a way in your life that you HAD to take this path to come through the ashes.
“Never mind about the birth info. I know enough.”
Do you have any squares in your chart with Pluto?
“…There is more to the world than how I feel and live. I pray because there is so much suffering in the world. Some of it is self-induced but some is not..”
The suffering you refer to is never taken for granted. I have lived it. Praying does not change the suffering of human plight or evolution. The act of prayer, as billions of people do, is in my world (or soul consciousness) the hope of wishful thinking. Wishful prayer is null and void in my reality. For strong reason. The act of praying in my soul… is similar to pledging for change among people, their deeds, without the relentless fortitude or desire to change (or transform) Ones-Self first.
This world we are apart of, meaning THE HUMANS functioning in this world, will always and forever create and contain suffering, cruelty, poverty, greed, despair and abuse in multitudes of ways. Since man survived for his life thousands and thousands of years ago, he was flawed. Humans en mass, will never be the Idealism you hope for in your heart. Living in the real world does not function this way. DEATH…. is a Natural part of our Life. It’s unavoidable. We cannot change the course of death, as egocentric personalities “think” they are capable of changing the world entirely of it’s corruption and fearful deeds. That “common belief” in my world, is a pervasive Illusion. It’s a dream unfulfilled of intellectual Idealism’s… that does not align with the Universe’s natural power and cyclical manifestations of Life and Death (of everything).
So if a human HAS NOT actually lived through and fought enough of these conjured illusions, destroyed them for what they are, thinking that he/she by serving the poor, the disadvantaged, the helpless and needy will make this world “a better place”… then he or she is not seeing life and death for what it actually IS within ones SOUL battlefield, not ones ego illusions to study virtue and being ‘superior’ among those who do not pray and those who do not volunteer their time to help. If from the soul consciousness of NOT FEARING inevitable death, this enables a person to make change in the human world one breath at time… through their soul-being among humans. They can heal and transform themselves and the others through connecting, engaging and obliterating the illusions of wishful ego ideologies mentioned above.
Consciousness is not “a science” in my reality. Science and it’s theories are man-made, man created, like a feature film or automobile. That is science. Scientific conclusions are Not divinely ordained. They are calculated through ego. Whereas, True Consciousness is the RECEPTION of God’s mind, from Dark to Light and Light to Dark within the fluxing human condition. God’s breath is Not the cause and effect **after** the human condition has manifested it’s ego-self deeds which have eternally created/caused this suffering and despair you are talking about. Reversing this human plight is not going to happen through intellectual pursuits. People will never actually live up to our Ideals. That is soul grounded reality. So ‘believing’ and expecting that our ideals will be met and followed by most of the 7 billion human beings here on earth, is very naive and fearful existence. Hence my entire expression here about conquering ones fears of emotional death, then reaching out to others through FEARLESS LOVE. Not through fearful love. Huge difference.
“…That is a valid path as well. Perhaps your karma presented itself in such a way in your life that you HAD to take this path to come through the ashes…”
Yes, exactly. It’s ordained. It’s not scientific. My path is for me. Yet I have died enough through personality vice…I have transformed it into Soul, to understand that the majority of people in this world, now… in the past… and in the future…. will not live amid God’s consciousness within each of themselves as individuals. The soulful tribe in the film Avatar is who and how each of us would BE in this existence for that wish to become a reality. That wish will never happen. Corrupted human vice will always prevail. the facts are clear. Survival and greed will dominate human life as it always has, because each human life does not, nor cannot it transcend itself through love and death of self-created illusion.
We are living among man’s illusion darling. Not soul reality. I hope you can fathom that.
“…Scientific conclusions are Not divinely ordained. They are calculated through ego…”
Let me tweak that statement. There have been a small few “prophetic scientists” throughout human history who were ordained in soul from a higher power at birth.
Einstein being one of those people.;)
“..Einstein being one of those people.;)”
That man’s life path was ordained to be a prophet, not wanting profit.:)
“… so much suffering in the world. Some of it is self-induced but some is not.”
Yes most human suffering is self-induced. The other cause of human suffering is a product of the personality abusers of others, which weaker people do not stand up to. Instead, they (the subconscious) mourns in martyrdom.
Martyrdom has no worth in resurrection of our soul. Martyrdom is the Karma seen (known) outside of ones physical being. The outer perception dominates the inner realm of feeling into static fear, sans depth and brave examination of WHY. No willpower, courage or light is slayed to free ones-self in that darkness, or bleakness of mind and heart. The dark (unknown) while in that state, is coddled by ego pity and attachment, yet not confronted. The inner Warrior is nowhere to be seen. The war within has not started, because that person does not know the war exists in the first place.
That’s enough from me for a while guys.
“Martyrdom has no worth in resurrection of our soul. Martyrdom is the Karma seen (known) outside of ones physical being. ”
Hmmmm….this is an interesting feeling…a person who chooses to die for a cause. If it is a religious ideology, then they die for their “beliefs”. But at the same time, they are “living” for them – before the fatal moment. We differenciate a martyr and a delinquent who gets shot by another delinquent…or a person who firmly believes that it is alright to walk outside at 3:00 in the afternoon, and gets a random bullet.
“The war within has not started, because that person does not know the war exists in the first place.”
Love that sentence….it evokes the idea that all the current arsenal is not working, and the search for what exactly will win it.
It won´t be anything that we are currently doing. Religions have been around for years…
Hello everyone!
Pluto Puppy, thank you for taking the time to articulate your thoughts here. I’m not done with you! lol 😉 I’m going to present my response in a different way. I have a lot to say but have pressing responsibilities. I have company coming tomorrow, so I have to prepare along with my studies. I WILL response as soon as possible, as I’m excited to continue the discussion.
Anyways, I’m going to offer selected links that I’ve hand-picked as prior reading. I think they will introduce some concepts of my response to your beliefs. I would quote them, but I don’t want to clutter this forum too much. Reading these links should not take longer than 20-30 mins.
There is no judgement from my part, and I’ve chosen the links with your interests in mind. 🙂
1. “Prayer – How’s It Working for You?”
http://yogananda-dif.org/swami-j/hindu-sri/prayer-hows-it-working-for-you.html
2. “The Law of Miracles”
-Please only read the first section. Pluto Puppy, this also discusses Maya and Einstein.
http://oaks.nvg.org/ayog.html
3. “Is Prayer Meditation?”
-Please only read the section titled “Is Prayer Meditation?”
http://www.mcs.ca/vitalspark/2020_schools/307yoga00.html
4. Sacrifice for the Happiness of Others
http://www.ananda.org/ask/826/does-sacrifice-make-one-unhappy/
5. Where to Direct Our Love
http://www.ananda.org/ask/785/where-to-direct-our-love/
6. A Spiritual Answer to Scientific Atheism
http://www.ananda.org/ask/774/a-spiritual-answer-to-scientific-atheism/
7. The Pursuit of a Spiritual Lifestyle (I LOVE this response)
http://www.ananda.org/ask/702/can-i-pursue-a-spiritual-life-while/
8. Accepting Beliefs that we Disagree With (for you, dear Pluto Puppy)
http://www.ananda.org/ask/657/accepting-beliefs-that-we-disagree-with/
9. Can we work out all karma on this physical Earth?
http://www.ananda.org/ask/619/can-we-work-out-astral-and-causal/
10. Is it right to pray for Healing? (for you, PP and Gatubela)
http://www.ananda.org/ask/555/is-it-right-to-pray-for-healing/
I posted my reply last night. It includes multiple links so it is waiting for moderation. 🙂
NOTE: I am reposting my reply but sectioning it off. Hopefully this will work! 😉
***********************************************************
Hello everyone!
Pluto Puppy, thank you for taking the time to articulate your thoughts here. I’m not done with you! lol 😉 I’m going to present my response in a different way. I have a lot to say but have pressing responsibilities. I have company coming tomorrow, so I have to prepare along with my studies. I WILL respond as soon as possible, as I’m excited to continue the discussion.
Anyways, I’m going to offer selected links that I’ve hand-picked as prior reading. I think they will introduce some concepts of my response to your beliefs. I would quote them, but I don’t want to clutter this forum too much. Reading these links should not take longer than 20-30 mins.
There is no judgement from my part, and I’ve chosen the links with your interests in mind. 🙂
1. “Prayer – How’s It Working for You?”
http://yogananda-dif.org/swami-j/hindu-sri/prayer-hows-it-working-for-you.html
2. “The Law of Miracles”
-Please only read the first section. Pluto Puppy, this also discusses Maya and Einstein.
http://oaks.nvg.org/ayog.html
Bunny, I am who I am.
Don’t make me spank you;)
3. “Is Prayer Meditation?”
-Please only read the section titled “Is Prayer Meditation?”
http://www.mcs.ca/vitalspark/2020_schools/307yoga00.html
4. Sacrifice for the Happiness of Others
http://www.ananda.org/ask/826/does-sacrifice-make-one-unhappy/
5. Where to Direct Our Love
http://www.ananda.org/ask/785/where-to-direct-our-love/
6. A Spiritual Answer to Scientific Atheism
http://www.ananda.org/ask/774/a-spiritual-answer-to-scientific-atheism/
7. The Pursuit of a Spiritual Lifestyle (I LOVE this response)
http://www.ananda.org/ask/702/can-i-pursue-a-spiritual-life-while/
8. Accepting Beliefs that we Disagree With (for you, dear Pluto Puppy)
http://www.ananda.org/ask/657/accepting-beliefs-that-we-disagree-with/
9. Can we work out all karma on this physical Earth?
http://www.ananda.org/ask/619/can-we-work-out-astral-and-causal/
10. Is it right to pray for Healing? (for you, PP and Gatubela)
http://www.ananda.org/ask/555/is-it-right-to-pray-for-healing/
Last one – see you all later! Contemplate. No need to change your convictions, but open your eyes and heart to another truth.
Hi Satnam,
I did read those links – many of these topics, we did discuss already in the forum…
Your last sentence:
” No need to change your convictions,
but open your eyes and heart to another truth.”
Is actually rather conflictive as the first phrase cancels the second.
It sounded like….I don´t know….a double imperative! LoL!!!
Also It does appear that you are actually “negating” your very own “teachings.
” I only truly “pursue” my relationship with the Divine. WITHOUT dogma, rituals, or condescension.”
Satnam, I did not read any articles in order to feel my truth….so it felt wierd in a way, reading them.
Gatebula, I don’t understand how it is contradictory. You can contemplate ANOTHER truth. I didn’t ask for you to find your own truth again (you are living that already). Just see another point of view. It may not resonate with you but it can open you to a new feeling. That is completely fine that it felt weird. I shared something and you reacted to it. It is all part of learning.
I am not condescending. I am sharing. If you do not want to read, no one will force you. 🙂 You have shared your experiences and beliefs, and I am sharing mine. I just did so in a different way. I suppose I live in a different way. 🙂
I love through inevitable conflict SatNam…. You haven’t grasped that truth in my relating but I’m sure you’ll find plenty of boyish puppy love easily, you’re a keeper. Many young lads would be happy to love you for what you teach them and probably change to suit your needs. I’m sure the ‘truth’ of calm affection 24/7 will honor your teachings to mold him, as you easily will.
If I wasn’t open to what’s out there… this discussion wouldn’t go this far. It would halt at… “hey… what’s up?”
Thanks for sharing what comforts you.
The point isn’t to simply share what comforts me. The point is that in explaining your reality and truth, you don’t open your mind to the fact that there is another truth. You are not absolutely correct and neither am I. But you disrespect what I believe in because it is too ‘calm’ for you. What happens after you fight some of your battles? How do you feel? Do you not feel at peace? Feel the Divinity within and a part of you? I’m not saying that I feel at peace all the time, because I have battles of my own. They are more private and I do not share them.
You’re making the assumption that I will not make true changes in my soul evolution because I spread peace and goodwill. There is a process to achieving that peace. Our soul remembers what ego struggles we have fought before and what is to come. I don’t have to come from an abused family and travel the world as an independent thinker, etc . in one lifetime to reach a state of spirituality as you have reached.
How quickly you change your opinion of what you think I believe love is. I am not aiming for a boyish love just to be hippy-dippy happy all my life. I have my own method for pulling through struggles and I foresee my future husband will as well. I’m not going to yell or subtly ask him to adopt my methods. But I do want to discuss and see if he feels that his way is the ONLY valid way. Will he respect my truth?
That is the whole point of my bringing up this topic. It is not as if that is the extent of deep conversation that I am capable of – you seem to be implying this. There are some conversations, darkness, and deep transformations that are NOT for the Internet and only with a certain someone. Please do not assume that there are not multiple layers to someone’s persona. How do you know I have not traveled the world? The greatest spiritual masters of our time were in a state of peace and samadhi. Do you discount them? They had PRIVATE struggles and demons.
Some layers are meant to be untouched by others until a specific time of our lives.
You may think I am naive because of the life choices I have made. I have free will to do anything at this time, but nothing is as beautiful as the Divine. Each choice is weighed heavily as there can be strong consequences. I have much to learn but don’t debase my experiences based on what I’ve told.
——-
We do nothing alone. Every person who touches our life aids us in our spiritual evolution.
If you believe love and reaching to others makes no difference, than why are you open to a relationship with another woman? If you were to meet the right woman, would you not welcome her love and insight? Would that not move you along your spiritual evolution? Even greater heights than where you are now?
Wouldn’t you have respect and compassion for the choices she makes?
You can extend that to your fellow human beings as well.
We all have a sphere of influence in our individual part of the world. Who is to say that we cannot become a beacon of light along with fire within? It is through the work of others SHARING their light that I have reached this point in my spiritual journey. You have acknowledged once that I am different compared to other twenty year olds. (Who knows? Maybe now you have changed your mind. 😉 It does not matter.) I have not reached this place alone.
I get a sense that you feel I have not “struggled” or “fought my demons” yet. Remember that I have not told my entire story and neither have you. 🙂 We do not have to fight against the entire spectrum of human ego struggles in ONE lifetime to be considered a living spiritual master. Just the fact that you are drawn towards the Divine means that you have done so for centuries in your prior lives. In each life, we have had particular struggles to work through and overcome.
This does not mean we are done. New struggles are imminent. Demons can rear their ugly head again. Through the depths of despair and raw bottom we can maintain a neutral state of Divine Consciousness.
Change is not immediate. Patience is necessary. Do your work without hopes of a reward. It is the right thing to do ethically and according to the principles of the Divine.
———-
I am not making the assumption that compassion and consciousness will push the world to a Avatar-like state. There will be chaos and discord, because there is an undercurrent to the physical world. Every person on this planet has karma from before. There are laws of the universe that cannot be fathomed within this physical existence. Perhaps this partially explains why rape and murder can happen. Why some people are born in conditions of abuse and starvation. There is SUCH complexity behind every aspect of this world.
Prayer alone cannot resolve these issues in the world. Some people have brought it upon themselves via their past lives. There are negative energy fields and a whole host of concepts that explains why the world is in its current state. If you believe, this has been foretold. But that is besides the point.
What we can do – as people aware of the Divine consciousness within and around us – is to help light a spark *or* a TIPPING point. Just one example.
I agree with you that the quest for consciousness and the beginning of the battle must come from within. However, some people are not strong enough or able enough to make changes if they have no shelter, no food, chronic medical conditions, no education, no vision, etc. Some people cannot fathom kindness in this world. It can be hard to feel the love and peace from Divine consciousness when they have no framework of it in the physical world.
Not everyone is like this of course. Some people are born or cultivate their inner fire so they can transform – like you. 🙂 Others need a whiff of Infinity’s fragrance before they can reach a tipping point.
Just like there are four elements, people perceive the world differently. Truth can come in the form of multiple directions and it will resonate uniquely with different people.
Here’s another example. Let’s say a person is already head-deep in battling their inner demons and ego and they see no end in sight. An interaction with another person who LIVES their consciousness can make an impact on their subconscious or supra-conscious level and respark their will to fight and continue the battle. They may not be consciously aware but their soul energies are.
Be the change you want in the world. If you find the concept of an Avatar world beautiful, then LIVE it. They had a strong sense of community – of human beings, living creatures, the earth, etc. No one is left behind and everyone in need is helped. If someone is sick, we use our Consciousness to pray and heal. 70% of life is determined via laws and karma beyond the physical world and control, but 30% can be mutable via energy, thought, consciousness, etc. Even if it is only one person. Who knows how that ONE person can change the world!
p.s. Most likely some concepts will resonate with you and some won’t. Respect. We can discuss by keeping ourselves open, and acknowledging that we DON’T know all the answers. I’m not aiming to say “I told you so”, “you’re wrong”, “you don’t get it” or anything similarly petty. I would hope we are both above that. 🙂
“Hence my entire expression here about conquering ones fears of emotional death, then reaching out to others through FEARLESS LOVE. Not through fearful love. Huge difference.”
Hmm, I don’t recall mentioning or even feeling fear in my written concepts. How can there be fear when we are aware of the Divine Consciousness? I am not afraid that you and I may not find a life partner. I have felt discouraged a couple of times, but that is different from fear. I have felt tenderness. These are Ego emotions and I am working through them. You have 15 years of life more than I have – give me time dear.
I have not prayed yet, but if I did, it would not be from fear. It would be to open the heart to the energies of another soul. Not a fear of loneliness or abandonment. For how can we be lonely with the Divine?
Do not confuse tenderness with fear. Perhaps I was not clear in my words.
“I have not prayed yet, but if I did, it would not be from fear. It would be to open the heart to the energies of another soul. Not a fear of loneliness or abandonment. For how can we be lonely with the Divine?”
WHA??… “It would be to open the heart to the energies of another soul”.
Ok. I’ll assume the heart you intend on open is not mine.
Your implication is contradicting to what I’ve been expressing, from me as a person (not a scripted dogma) for three years here. Have your say, that’s not my problem. You’ve twisted and suggested nothing credible which has to do with the reality and context of what I’ve been openly and personally sharing. Why? (rhetorical)
“..For how can we be lonely with the Divine?”
I’ve have never said I was lonely. You said that. Or implied that, with game. Game meaning you actually think I don’t understand your comment. So you know your Shadow in depth huh?… You know the life of struggle?… You know pain huh?… You see the illusions and figments of your personality huh? You see your hypocrisy and zero ability to empathize eh? You understand the fear felt in darkness eh? CONFUSION is beneath you huh? Your tremendous life experiences must understand the fear experienced in darkness to imply that you know God. Wow… you’ve really lived. How dare I.
If I glared into your eyes with calm, intense stillness, you’ll fear. No, not me. You’ll fear the finite awareness of You. You’ll fear waht is not understood within you. If you haven’t feared in your 20 something life, then you cannot or do not want to feel what is real. Out of fear (the unknown). You live in the comforts of your head. I’m not judging, I see it in many. Or, the truth could be be you’re blatantly lying about your existence above fear. I’ll choose that one. So your life is above pain and “abandonment” also right?? Hmm, It must be, according to the baseless MEANING/context you’ve written from your memorized, cold teachings. I’ll contain myself here.
It’s so easy for all of us to speak of love in writing. Toooo easy infact. So easy we don’t actually experience what is unknown in the real world. If we did, we would Identify and know love IN THE REAL WORLD. Fear is (death) It’s unavoidable. But not in your divinity I see. I’ve forgotten how much experience of this knowing you have genuinely shared with us here. Forgive me. Not even writing about… pain, ambivalence or struggle… which you can’t write about to justify your righteous conclusions, how fitting, to primp up your beliefs, to fortify them and not accept reality. Again, forgive me… I just remembered “you’re tender”…not fearful. Gosh.
I’m not taking this conversation any further with you. What you haven’t experienced within you, BECAUSE OF FEAR is something I am not responsible for proving here on a well intended forum. You’ll need to live and die that existence before you can teach me a dammed thing.
Go ahead and argue. You’ll be impressing yourself.
Peace and the End;)
“I feel at peace all the time, because I have battles of my own. They are more private and I do not share them.”
“I feel at peace all the time”…
I believe you. Now prepare for death.
You don’t share battles because you can’t share them. You’re afraid and are a hypocrite. Point blank.
You’ve started the war of politicizing. I’m just responding as I always have.
“… Feel the Divinity within and a part of you?..”
Yes. You should, but I’ll have to conflict you first, in the present, for you to get a glimmering feeling of what Divinity really is.
I told you love through inevitable conflict.
– “.. What happens after you fight some of your battles? How do you feel? Do you not feel at peace?..”
Yes, I feel at peace. Not 24/7 though. Nature is not sunlight 24/7 nor is it dark 24/7. I am at one with that nature. I feel it through all shades, disasters and seasons within. If I claimed to be a tranquil man every waking breathe, that would mean I’m perceiving my life is a lie. Because I have fought the war to know the price of peace. Do you know the price of peace? Peace without the awareness of war is innocence. My innocence has been destroyed in mind and heart, it has transformed via battle. If you knew the existence of inner battle, your innocence would not ask that limited question.
– “How do you know I have not traveled the world?”
Well you tell me, have you? Now you really sound like a little girl. Did you travel the globe? Why imply that I should guess if you have? Why not just tell the truth??
Immediately following that you say here:
– “… The greatest spiritual masters of our time were in a state of peace and samadhi. Do you discount them? They had PRIVATE struggles and demons.”
Yes they did encounter REAL LIFE struggles. And NO, I don’t discount a spiritual soul who knows suffering. Where is the correlation and truth of Your life RELATIVE to their lives?? What is relevant about your unclear arguments, your implied global travels, which you weren’t truthful about in the first place??
– ” If you believe love and reaching to others makes no difference, than why are you open to a relationship with another woman? ..”
I said (emphasized) praying makes no difference in my life. I did not say reaching out to others makes no difference. You conjured that comment above. I am open to a relationship with another woman who knows the difference between lies and living in the present breath with a man (the truth).
– ” Will he respect my truth?..”
He won’t respect it if he sees what I see. But I’m sure he won’t see it. So yes, he will respect your “truth”.
– “.. If you were to meet the right woman, would you not welcome her love and insight? .”
Yes of I course I would welcome her insight. Based on knowing I chose the woman who knew herself deeply first, before she bases her “insight” of knowing human nature and the nature of the world we live in.
– “..Would that not move you along your spiritual evolution?..”
Yes, IF I was in love with ‘a woman’ who knew herself beyond reading.
————————————————-
Goodbye SatNam, we have ended.
….love through inevitable conflict….
….loving even when dying….
It gives me some painful tingling feeling but it’s so beautiful…. just pure passion I guess… burning!!! (lol)
It is when I can still love even the entire world is there to fail me that is how I know I am truly in love. We are the captains of our own ships, you can test how good the captain is, not in a Calm Ocean but during stormy weather. Once you’ve weathered one, you can weather more…. like gosh! There is nothing that I can’t do! You just wake up one day, You feel different! Like there is an order out there in the universe that is so profound and you feel that you belong.
I have said time and time again that I do not have as much as
life experience as you do. But you seem to have closed your
mind. I am not feeling angry or defensive. I welcome your
challenge, because it is an opportunity for growth.
Perhaps you cannot fathom that a “little girl” has experienced
anything with Death? I never presumed to know and have
experienced ALL about fear, death, divinity, etc. I suppose
you do not want to give the benefit of the doubt – which is
understandable. I do not know how to articulate in words some
of my experiences. It is like explaining how it feels to feel
Divine Consciousness. You can judge all you would like about
how deeply I have experienced and felt death and fear, but
your judgements are only based on what I am able to
communicate. And this is something I cannot communicate.
– “How do you know I have not traveled the world?”
Well you tell me, have you? Now you really sound like a little
girl. Did you travel the globe? Why imply that I should guess
if you have? Why not just tell the truth??”
This question was not asked to one-up you, feel proud, or
brag. I have limited time here so I must write my answers
quickly. Mincing words will get us nowhere. Pluto Puppy, all of my stories are truth. I do not
lie to you or anyone. But I made a decision several several
posts before to not reveal anymore personal details because
this is the Internet. I do not know how to write like a mystic
and share experiences in an ambivalent manner.
Just because I do not share, does not mean I am lying. Take it
as you will. 🙂
“If you knew the existence of inner battle, your innocence
would not ask that limited question.”
Ah, implications..implications. I laugh that you question if I
have ever experienced inner battles or known of war. You are
judging wrongly, Pluto Puppy.
“Yes, IF I was in love with ‘a woman’ who knew herself beyond
reading.”
Experience is vital. Without experience, we know nothing.
“Hmm, It must be, according to the baseless MEANING/context
you’ve written from your memorized, cold teachings. I’ll
contain myself here.”
I can sense your strong feelings against spiritual writings,
man-made dogma, etc. We can learn from multiple sources for
our soul evolution along WITH experience. I have not memorized
any dogma or writings. I don’t have an arsenal of links to
battle anyone with different views. I just open myself and
search for answers as ONE dimension of my spiritual existence.
Those were the first times I encountered those links. Yes,
sometimes I will remember some quotes that touched me because
I have a MEMORY. I also try to learn from others who have
radically different views from me. I am human. Just like you
have shared some of your experiences, I wanted to share mine.
It provoked a strong reaction within you, because you could
not believe that I experienced anything beyond what I wrote.
Understandable.
“I’ve have never said I was lonely. You said that. Or implied
that, with game. Game meaning you actually think I don’t
understand your comment.”
Miscommunication. It was just a thought I added. Of course I
remember you stating that you do not NEED a relationship with
another woman because of the Divine. I was not playing a game,
but I think you are trying to find more behind the words.
Games are pointless.
“So you know your Shadow in depth huh?… You know the life of
struggle?… You know pain huh?… You see the illusions and
figments of your personality huh? You see your hypocrisy and
zero ability to empathize eh? You understand the fear felt in
darkness eh? CONFUSION is beneath you huh? Your tremendous
life experiences must understand the fear experienced in
darkness to imply that you know God. Wow… you’ve really lived.
How dare I.”
First, it is ironic how you accuse me of having zero empathy
when you write as if you have none. You are EXPECTING me to
have experienced as YOU have. With the depth, intensity, and
probing as YOU have. I have not – if you frame it like that.
What do you want me to do? Lay out all of my life experiences
on the table? So you can nit-pick and debase everything? I do
not fear your response. But I see futility in trying to take
this step. There is always more to share for ANY of us. But a
line must be drawn when respect is not given.
Great empathy skill.;) You really can identify with others without playing the “respect” card. Coddle that infantile ego. Yes, I don’t respect you. For one clear reason, not of what you do to seek, or study or learn. I despise the truth of your INTENTIONS to play and force a game of “who kicked down my sandcastle!!”.
Even through all my battles here on the forum, I have never used the “respect” pity party to gain social favor. Grasp that.
You’re not worthy of my response anymore. Turning my back on a person is the highest form of disrespect in my world.;)
Hi Satnam,
We can start by discussing the articles that you have chosen. Can you give me some thoughts on each one?
“The point is that in explaining your reality and truth, you don’t open your mind to the fact that there is another truth.”
God, the sole life, is an absolute unity; He cannot appear as the separate and diverse manifestations of a creation except under a false or unreal veil. That cosmic illusion is maya. Every great scientific discovery of modern times has served as a confirmation of this simple pronouncement of the rishis.
“There are some conversations, darkness, and deep transformations that are NOT for the Internet and only with a certain someone.”
“But I do want to discuss and see if he feels that his way is the ONLY valid way”
The yogi who thus denudes the universe is the only true monotheist. All others are worshipping heathen images.
From science, then, if it must be so, let man learn the philosophic truth that there is no material universe; its warp and woof is maya, illusion. Its mirages of reality all break down under analysis. As one by one the reassuring props of a physical cosmos crash beneath him, man dimly perceives his idolatrous reliance, his past transgression of the divine command: “You shall have no other gods before me.”
“You’re making the assumption that I will not make true changes in my soul evolution because I spread peace and goodwill. There is a process to achieving that peace. Our soul remembers what ego struggles we have fought before and what is to come.”
“To every action there is always an equal and contrary reaction; the mutual actions of any two bodies are always equal and oppositely directed.” Action and reaction are thus exactly equal. “To have a single force is impossible. There must be, and always is, a pair of forces equal and opposite.”
Electricity, for example, is a phenomenon of repulsion and attraction; its electrons and protons are electrical opposites. Another example: the atom or final particle of matter is, like the earth itself, a magnet with positive and negative poles. The entire phenomenal world is under the inexorable sway of polarity; no law of physics, chemistry, or any other science is ever found free from inherent opposite or contrasted principles.
“The point is that in explaining your reality and truth, you don’t open your mind to the fact that there is another truth.”
To rise above the duality of creation and perceive the unity of the Creator was conceived of as man’s highest goal.
All others are worshipping heathen images. So long as man remains subject to the dualistic delusions of nature, the Janus-faced maya is his goddess; he cannot know the one true God.
I have almost read upto 796 posts of this blog. I truly appreciate the profound depth and brutal eye-opening honesty displayed in specific by Pluto Puppy, Umm, and Gatubela.
Thanks a lot for enlightening the ‘masses’ like me who are groping in the darkness of a scorpio’s soul.
Respect.
Hi CancerianPink…
Up to 796! And you are 1186! I came in at 266!
Hi Gatubela,
“God, the sole life, is an absolute unity; He cannot appear as the separate and diverse manifestations of a creation except under a false or unreal veil. That cosmic illusion is maya.”
Multiple truths are different ways of looking at the same
constant. We all perceive differently and we relate to each
other as human beings differently. I personally believe that
there is one constant and so you can consider that
“monotheistic”. Here’s an example. Imagine that constant to be
an Elephant. A blind man will stroke the elephant’s skin,
smell its odor, and hear its noises. A deaf man, however, can notice the colors and vibrancy that make up the animal.
The constant is the same.
Thus we are blind when we think our truth is the
only way. It is easy to think so because that is what we have
experienced and that is our reality. Maybe we can hypothesize
these impaired men will be reborn in other lifetimes with
fully functioning senses and will perceive the constant
differently. Regardless, the constant will forever remain pure Consciousness.
“All others are worshipping heathen images.”
I believe Consciousness is formless with no images or human characteristics.
“As one by one the reassuring props of a physical cosmos crash beneath him, man dimly perceives his idolatrous reliance, his past transgression of the divine command: “You shall have no other gods before me.””
I believe the world as we know it is an illusion. What is there to mourn for death when it was never truly “living”? Compared to other living creatures on this earth, even our physical senses are suboptimal. Our range of vision is incredibly tiny compared to the spectrum of wavelengths and rays in this physical universe. Similar for the sense of hearing. When we cannot even perceive the “physical world” completely, no wonder there is such a long and arduous quest to perceive the true Consciousness that is ever present.
“To have a single force is impossible. There must be, and always is, a pair of forces equal and opposite.”
Karma uses this concept in which each action/thought/etc. can bring you either to your negative or positive polarity. The positive polarity furthers the soul evolution. This does not mean that only positive thoughts can magnetize us to the positive polarity. It means that each experience that breaks down this illusion…that truly Realizes the Consciousness…THAT is what can end this cycle.
Of course, the cycle is a product of our mind. But to put this in words, I must use physical terminology.
“So long as man remains subject to the dualistic delusions of nature, the Janus-faced maya is his goddess; he cannot know the one true God.”
God is beyond man-made concepts and theories. One important step is to realize that is even a concept of Consciousness. Then one step is to KNOW it. But to LIVE it is very difficult. Other masters have left guidance during their times in the physical realm. It is not wrong to seek guidance as it can aid in our perception and experience. After a certain point, we have Realized Consciousness in such a manner that we do not need guidance. The Divine IS our guidance to shatter the illusions. Our intuition IS the Divine. It is incredible. For how could it not be? 😉
Hi Satnam,
Hi Satnam,
Multiple truths are different ways of looking at the same constant.
OK…then you must ask me to perceive this constant, and not another multiple truth. You are asking me to perceive your Maya. I already let you know that I did…
What is there to mourn for death when it was never truly “living”?
Mourn is a good word….what did you feel when your Grandfather died?
Put these two together and tell me how you feel.
“Compared to other living creatures on this earth, even our physical senses are suboptimal. Our range of vision is incredibly tiny compared to the spectrum of wavelengths and rays in this physical universe. “
“I believe Consciousness is formless with no images or human characteristics.”
“When we cannot even perceive the “physical world” completely, no wonder there is such a long and arduous quest to perceive the true Consciousness that is ever present.”
We are geared to perceive life with the 5 senses. So you could explore what “senses” are required to perceive consciousness.
“Karma uses this concept in which each action/thought/etc. can bring you either to your negative or positive polarity. It means that each experience that breaks down this illusion…that truly Realizes the Consciousness…THAT is what can end this cycle.”
So…before you mentioned that KY can be used to work on your karma. Experiences are interesting to have. What kind of experiences break down negative polarity illusions? Or Positive Polarity illusions. Since both negative and positive (duality) is not perceiving the UNITY/GOD /ONE
“Of course, the cycle is a product of our mind. But to put this in words, I must use physical terminology.”
What cycle is that again? Did not catch it.
“So long as man remains subject to the dualistic delusions of nature, the Janus-faced maya is his goddess; he cannot know the one true God.”
God is beyond man-made concepts and theories. One important step is to realize that is even a concept of Consciousness. Then one step is to KNOW it. But to LIVE it is very difficult.
Hmmm, according to the article, all you have to do is just figure out how to live without dualistic illusions. So we are back to the first sentence of this post.
Gatubela,
“..So we are back to the first sentence of this post..”
That is why anything said between the both of you is in vain. Real soulful empathizing and relating doesn’t bicker and argue opinions for brainy points. The soul sees and feels but does play like it were in a court room. I entrust the real soul within you can stop falling into her immaturity needs playtime;)
The soul sees and feels but does ‘Not’ play like it were in a court room.;)
Initially when this man struck me during a phone detailed phone conversation after a year of casual friendship, I felt ‘turned on’. More vibrant, more energized. The next day when we meet, he had a strange mysterious look on his face. He wouldn’t look me in the eye. Although he left for another country to pursue higher education after a week, I often felt myself trapped in a strange sort of overwhelming feeling. At times, I felt as if he was trying to seduce me and missing me desperately. On the physical plane, there was a deadlock of communication despite my frequent messages. That was the time when I engaged myself into soulful communication. Once I even told him all this on messages but he denied saying that it was all in my head. The worst mistake I committed was to make the first move and tell him how I felt.
I even cried on phone out of love. He told me told me that he didn’t feel the same way about me and we were just friends. But when he heard me crying, he got all emotionally-hyped up and started banging his fists on the table saying that I should love myself and he couldnt see me crying. When I wouldn’t believe that he dint feel the same way about me (my gut feeling sharply said that he was lying), he told me that he had a girlfriend. A month later I found out that to be the lie.
We kept on communicating on msgs though he would disappear quite often. My soul became so strongly involved and felt his presence so much that I felt a part of him. I dreamt once that he was upset and pacing in a hoodie in a dark room. Later, he told me that he was going through a lot.
Cutting a long story short, although he does not admit on the face, he doesnt walk his talk. He has made genuine sacrifices for me but doesnt admit his feelings. I started nagging him a lot because of him disappearing for long intervals because of which he became pissed off. Although we patched up after a face to face encounter, I find him ignoring me in front of our mutual friends. Mt existence is not acknowledged at all. But I still love him to death.
A month earlier my nagging again led to a breakdown in communication. Its been more than a month since this happened. Although this interval has made me emotionally stronger (im working on my crabby clinginess and fighting my insecurities and discovering self-love), I have weird visions. Like yesterday, while meditating listening to binaural beats, I encountered him on a beach in my heart/soul. He took me to a deep abyss (that he said were parts of him) and showed me the corners where he felt my nagging or where he encountered deceptiveness of people. I completely lost touch with reality while experiencing this. Suddenly he said he had to go. Ever since then, I dont feel over-whelmed.
Is it in my head? or is ut real? I miss him so much. But Im not going to be treated like a doormat and apologize. I feel being taken for granted giving away self-less love.
P.S: I have a pluto in scorpio too. So does he!
Pluto Puppy your insights will be truly welcomed 🙂
Pinky,
“…I find him ignoring me in front of our mutual friends..”
He has let you go darling. I’m sorry but he has let you go. His focus is not on you anymore, is that hard for you to accept?
“.. Is it in my head? or is ut real? I miss him so much. But Im not going to be treated like a doormat and apologize..”
Yes, you’re wanting a connection that has been severed. If he is a man with some relationship awareness of soul and empathy, he does not want your “apology”… it’s too late for apologies as he has cut the cord with you.
He’s moved on psychologically, maybe he didn’t feel the relationship was healthy and strong or happy for either of you… because of all that nagging, fighting clinginess and co-dependency had a hold of both of you. He may have already foreseen the potential of where that dysfunction was going. We can be very intuitive of our feelings if a woman has the capacities and toughness to understand us. Perhaps darling your fizzy nagging, those experiences told him that you were caught up in your own little bubble, wanting to be heard and acknowledged, but you did not have the empathy (very important) to understand his core needs from you.
“Enclosures” of feeling and of communication are natural defense mechanisms in the ancient Cancer nature.
Find another one baby… you’ll just have to learn from ‘your part’ in the dysfunction of what happened. You can change yourself you know? You can relate and express more independently for the next one.
You’ll be fine.
Hi P.Puppy
I entrust the real soul within you can stop falling into her immaturity needs playtime;)
We handle things differently…I am a Cat…not a fierce and passionate eagle.
“The soul sees and feels but does play like it were in a court room.”
Yes…beautiful. But…I don´t play.
I can only show her the loop as seen from my heart and soul.
Yes you’re a cat, one with integrity too, I suppose I just didn’t want to see it drawn out becoming a monster of it’s own.;)
I have treated my insecurities now. We had a communication breakdown more than a month ago but the feeling of being a part of his soul has no pattern. Sometimes, it is so strong that I become dysfunctional. This happened last week when I had to walk out of office earlier due to my immense lack of concentration. There are times when it weakens (like now) and I can focus on my life. The point being: I do not feel disconnected; there is variation in the level of intensity.
Ever since we struck off, his attitude towards everyone has changed. He remains in his cave most of the time, while his peers complain of his lack of sociability. When we fought earlier two months ago and he turned cold on me, I felt the lack of connection, yet when we met a month later, he melted and forgave me and the sweetness was restored. I personally feel that he unevolved and searching for his own self before he enters into an official relationship with me.
He is a strange man. He pretends a lot. Yet his behaviour is unpredictable. He has been ignoring me in front of our mutual friends ever since we kicked off because, as he told my friend, he did not want anyone to suspect that something is going on between us.
I do not want to let him go because my heart believes that it is a matter of time before things get sorted out. Deep down, there is a strong feeling that tells me we are made for each other. I have never felt to stable and so ‘right in the place’ standing next to any man on this planet except him. I trust my gut because it was the same feeling that showed me the truth in his lies which were later confirmed in reality.
Is it possible to spiritually connect with a scorpio’s inner world if he doesn’t want a connection. And does a connection imply that he is the one initiating it or is it just a figment of my imagination?
Gatubela,
Somehow you seem like a psychic to me..You and Pluto Puppy have way too much depth that is not found in ordinary people…
I feel so disoriented most of the time…When I feel overwhelmed, I cannot focus on anything….
I do not want to let go of the feeling either because it makes me feel a part of the person I love…
I do not know how to resolve this paradox 😦
I have let go of all the hurt and negativity in my heart. I love him unconditionally now and often try to show it to him through emotional visualization. I hope he can feel it…
Everyone around me is so materialistic. As long as something is observed tangibly, it is acknowledged. The dominion of feelings and spirituality goes disregarded in this superficial world.
Hi Cancer,
Love these comments.
“I feel so disoriented most of the time…When I feel overwhelmed, I cannot focus on anything…
“I do not want to let go of the feeling either because it makes me feel a part of the person I love…”
The paradox that you mention occurs based on the fact that you are not used to applying your will to resolve intuitively felt “illusions”.
And the reason for that, is that you feel that love follows the rules of this materialistic and very Tangible existence.
Nope…
Love is GOD…so if you want to be an expert on handling this paradox, you will have to feel GOD in yer heart first. This should make perfect sense for a Cancer!!!
Until then, girl….you are screwed! And you know it.
So, get off that fence of inactivity….and don´t focus on his lack of presence and your desire to understand it.
You actually need to do something about it.
Scorpio has the tendency to SHOW us truthes about yourself….if you happen to have one.
Otherwise, you will be scrambling in the mists, trying to grasp at anything….TANGIBLE….
What you need to see, is that LOVE is intangible…and learn to grasp at it as well.
So, feel this in your heart first, as it can be the basis for soul connection and compassion.
“I have let go of all the hurt and negativity in my heart. I love him unconditionally now and often try to show it to him through emotional visualization. I hope he can feel it…”
I hope you can BE it!!! He won´t feel anything, unless it is a truth or a state of being in you. So if you are using visualization, you must keep in mind (actually, in your heart) that you must be true to yourself and manifest a state of being that you already have in you.
So…you can not be trying….you either are it, or you are not!
He may be instigating that you explore certain things about yourself….this is nice, but still, you can have something that really is not there in the first place.
Also, don´t loose track of your reality and your very tangible situation. It keeps you grounded and humble.
“Everyone around me is so materialistic. As long as something is observed tangibly, it is acknowledged. The dominion of feelings and spirituality goes disregarded in this superficial world.”
Yeah….because people don´t feel GOD / LOVE. So everything we have built in our lives, while not feeling love, will enter the TANGIBLE loop – di – loop!
sigh….
“He may be instigating that you explore certain things about yourself….this is nice, but still, you can have something that really is not there in the first place.”
Ooopppsss!
But still you CAN´T have something that really is not there in the first place.
I mean…you can´t send him prayers and hope vibes, when the truth is, you are under his “swoop effect” and are feeling sexually attracted to him..
They will come across as being highly insincere. Usually, they know their effect on women…so, it will come across as a huge lie.
Are you seeing the picture?
“.. Somehow you seem like a psychic to me..You and Pluto Puppy have way too much depth that is not found in ordinary people…
Hahaha… yeah the lunatic is set free on this site for me personally. In my social jaunts out in materialistic land, I find myself muting, observing and listening carefully most of the time. I’m the guy out there where people want to reveal their issues and gossip about the insanity and limitation they’re involved with through their friends, family and lovers. It does get draining hearing how people cannot free themselves and change their problems. I see the reality of stagnation in peoples hearts/heads over time. My essence feels for them, but I make sure I am not OF them on a daily social basis.
Miss. Pink
“..Is it possible to spiritually connect with a scorpio’s inner world if he doesn’t want a connection. And does a connection imply that he is the one initiating it or is it just a figment of my imagination?..”
Well, now that you’ve said you feel he “pretends” a lot… this type of being (or behavior) tells me he’s still finding his own way in life. He’s still young and searching, even though it may be on the materialistic (seen) plane like all your other friends and associates. He is probably “not sure” of what he truthfully wants in women and in his life. That’s normal, I wouldn’t hold that against him. On subconscious levels, he probably hates the needy, clingy dependency of negative energy between you both which evokes sloppy, careless acts and futile expression. Remember Miss. Pink, we must have our dignity when arguing or fighting. Childish impulses to get what we want for the sake of feeding insecurity, does not make us feel solid and powerful.
You wanna know a secret?… If you want to try and get him back, you’ll have to make him feel powerful and unique. He doesn’t want to be treated equally like a friend. What’s special about that? So How??… Well, by understanding his needs, and by understanding your needs to cling until hell freezes over.
I can see you understand what the energy of respect means through this forum. That’s excellent. Utilize that knowing with him every moment in every manner and stay present in the moment without feeling afraid. Be mature and nurturing with him. Ask him questions which open up more understanding and forgiveness between you. Don’t feel afraid to ask him what he really wants in a woman and a relationship. You’re gonna have to show him you are strong and lovable regardless of his approval. So that’s why I suggested you move on, detach yourself and build your confidence in your emotional identity with other guys. You need to show him you are “your own woman” with layers of love and tenderness to give. But he has to earn it by acknowledging your INDEPENDENCE. He needs to realize your Independence of mind heart, and bank account.
Be the woman he would never expect you to be and watch what happens. He will pursue you because he knows you are not a little girl who yearns for coddled love… he will “see” that you do actually “love yourself”… which is what he said you should be doing from the beginning.
When he says to you “love yourself”… he really means “please be an independent empress so I can honor your specialness.”
Hi Cancer Pink,
Sorry for taking a bit long for answering…I am not a scorpio guy, so I can´t actually speak for him!
I can focus on you however…
Again, throughout this forum, I have emphasized the importance of journeying into the abyss.
You have to feel your energies Cancer…as this has to be your main priority. It is an all encompassing solution to all of your problems. Nothing more will be needed. So, to tell you the truth, you are falling for ideas….rationalities, and I am not really seeing much understanding…or struggles to understand, what Love is.
And you won´t understand what love is, unless you begin searching for truth. Once you feel this truth… (as an example, we can say that there is DEFINITELY something this guy is not telling you…and I am willing to bet that you internally FEEL it, but can not vioce it either), can you LIVE it?
Love is a state of being…so I am guessing that you are not truly loving anyone on a good day! And not even yourself! Also, I don´t feel any battles fought just for love….and not for getting to keep the guy.
I assure you, when you love, it is not about keeping the guy…
It is about loving the guy….
So why complicate things with insecurities and rationalizations? Of course you will do this, if you are NOT listening to yourself and feeling love in your heart.
““please be an independent empress so I can honor your specialness.”
I don´t know how this comment makes you feel, but it should not go to your ego…honouring makes me feel like I am being placed on a pedestal and not being seen for all that makes me who I am today.
Do you want to be honoured? Or do you want to be loved?
However, we can honour through love….which includes perceiving his divinity and nourishing that as well.
Which brings us to this statement:
” Childish impulses to get what we want for the sake of feeding insecurity, does not make us feel solid and powerful.”
I am thinking that perhaps you will not understand what exactly this statement entails…
But it has to probably do with the INTRINSIC motivations that brought you to the point of commenting….
Meaning, if you examine your state of mind…it was probably based on an insecurity. With this insecurity, you did not go further in identifying whether it was worth commenting or not….
And you probably did not purify yourself first, before commenting. Meaning, no negativity.
But it comes down to being honest with yourself, and striving to base the comunication on your boundries, your sense of values and your feeling, deep inside you, of what love is.
Can you solve these issues on your own? Do you need him to help you? Is he there for you anyways, on that basis of “getting you over this?” and not feeling insecure, through LOVING yourself, and NOT him giving you what you WANT?
Giving a crying baby, more candy or what they want, teaches them that crying is a great thing to do.
Scorpio will perceive these things and react accordingly…of course. And most of the time, it will not be pleasant, as you begin to see Martian energy and volcanic bubbling. This is the ALL or NOTHING passionate response, and it is what is making you feel like crap at the moment.
So, I will say it to you gently…and softly….and with love in my heart…
“Stop being so insecure…or selfish…or childish….and work on it. Get over yourself.”
Look at that guy in front of you, and start understanding just what the heck is going on, starting with yourself. Start feeling first, that this is your burden to resolve first…
And the mists will clear.
Hi again…
Making scorpio feel powerful, is rather a difficult thing to “get on the target”…!
So…how to explain?
But perhaps if you think about your life experiences, what has made you become a stronger person?
(Whether you have a close relationship with your mom, i will explain it in the following way…)
Was it mommy giving you the soother, when you cried, wanting comfort?
Or was it, mommy guiding you and teaching you that you were strong enough to not need it? Her believing in you, seeing your strengthes and weaknesses, and encouraging you to feel that you had it in ya?
(Evolved) Scorpio will not give you the soother Cancer…can you feel it within you to be a possibility that.he expects you to be more than two years old?
My quote:
“I’m not saying that I feel at peace all the time, because I have battles of my own.”
———-
Pluto Puppy’s post:
“I feel at peace all the time, because I have battles of my own. They are more private and I do not share them.”
“I feel at peace all the time”…
I believe you. Now prepare for death.
You don’t share battles because you can’t share them. You’re afraid and are a hypocrite. Point blank.
You’ve started the war of politicizing. I’m just responding as I always have.”
————-
My words have been twisted. Did you misread by chance? I will give you the benefit of the doubt.
—————-
A hypocrite is one who says/does one thing and then flips to the other side of the action. To state one has experiences, does not mean one has to share those experiences. It would be hypocritical IF I accused YOU of not sharing battles of a specific kind/quantity/experience/etc. I don’t recall I ever did? You chose to share some things about yourself and I chose to share different things about myself. Free choice. Where is the hypocrisy? 🙂
“You’re not worthy of my response anymore.”
“Even through all my battles here on the forum, I have never used the “respect” pity party to gain social favor. Grasp that.”
“I despise the truth of your INTENTIONS to play and force a game of “who kicked down my sandcastle!!”.”
I don’t consider you as higher or lower than me. We are equal in Consciousness.
Thus, there is no social favor to be gained and no concept of ‘superiority’ via a “sandcastle”. Only an exchange of ideas and experiences. I am not here for “battles” with other beings of Consciousness.
No one is ‘forced’ to respond. When there are no members exchanging ideas/experiences with me after this point, then I will not be disappointed or upset. :)The exchange has reached its completion and it would be time to move on.
“That is why anything said between the both of you is in vain. Real soulful empathizing and relating doesn’t bicker and argue opinions for brainy points.”
To me, arguing is when one is trying to force or convince a person that they are right. I apologize now if I offended someone with what I have shared. I believe I have stated multiple times before that my intention is not to ‘convert’.
I share “a loop” of my soul with Gatubela and the forum. If they don’t want anything to do it with it, then they do not have to respond. There are lots of great posts here already – INCLUDING some of yours Pluto Puppy!
p.s. Gatubela, I will respond to your post tomorrow. 🙂
Back to your level again hey? I see you want more, here you go:
“I’m not saying that I feel at peace all the time, because I have battles of my own.”
Yes, you’re 100% right, you did say that, AND… you didn’t finish your original quote after that sentence?.. Why is that??.. Here’s the following sentence I quoted from you after, which was…”They (your battles) are more private and I do not share them. ” p. 1176.
My response above to that on p. 1179 to your superficial game responds accordingly regardless of the three words I had left off my initial point. My disdain for you as person has not changed.
Want more hypocrisy, confusion and fear? Here. Your earlier “beliefs” politicized to baseless esteem, while contradicting the verb OF THIS POST in the moment, IN THE PRESENT here:
Then p. 1153
“We should not hurt because of power, jealousy, anger, possessiveness, (e.g. tattooing ‘mine’ on the girl’s body) petty fights, or commitment issues. Constantly working on a relationship with the Divine BEFORE entering a relationship helps resolve those “issues” of the mind. Any residual issues should be worked out in a loving and understanding framework.”
“Because of petty fights”… Really!??. Then why start this up again now hypocrite??
Hey, no “hurt” over here. Just plain contempt for your intentions. Still don’t get it huh?… If you believe in the Truth of your above paragraph, meaning the verb of your above paragraph, NOT THE DOGMA… WHY then are you continuing the weak ego game in your head right now?.. in the present here right now? Your intent here NOW, does not justify your “beliefs then”. .. WHY is that wise one??
Speaking of this dogma (baseless nouns) you had politicized earlier with – “we should not hurt because of power, jealousy, anger, possessiveness etc…” p. 1153.
HEY. There is no such thing as— “a relationship with the divine BEFORE entering a relationship”. That illusion means, you don’t live IN THE PRESENT MOMENT with people, if you are seeking the Divine before entering into a relationship. That baseless ploy means You are living in the superficial superiority of your false ego balloon from past or in future games swirling around in your own tiny head.
Onward in that same paragraph you said:
“Helps resolve those issues of the mind” … O Really!? So why do you provoke more “issues of the mind” right here now?? again… in your hypocritical verbs?? Why? … not ‘the words said’ in 1153? Why do you Not Do, what you speak about?
When you can Be what you actually speak of in the moment, not through spacey ideology and foolishness, I might actually show you some compassion. Though right now, you are reaping exactly what you sow with me in soul. So expect a dry harvest Virgin.
The game is invisible to you, I know.
“Because of petty fights”… Really!??. Then why start this up again now hypocrite??
WHY then are you continuing the weak ego game in your head right now?.. in the present here right now? Your intent here NOW, does not justify your “beliefs then”. .. WHY is that wise one??
To me, this is not a fight. I asked for clarification on your quotes. I also responded.
This may be petty to you because you are very evolved. We are equal in Consciousness but differ in spiritual evolvement. I acknowledge that. On this path, I am “constant” in terms of Consciousness and “dynamic” in terms of spiritual progress. One day there will only be Constant.
Thus responding to you is a lesson for me. You could interject and say “if you really learned your lesson, you would have stopped” or “I see no gain in this lesson”. But there are private lesson(s) for me.
“Then why start this up again now hypocrite??”
I did not end anything.
“Helps resolve those issues of the mind” … O Really!? So why do you provoke more “issues of the mind” right here now??”
Because I am still learning. I am not perfect yet. Why is why I used the term ‘metaphor’ for the ladder of spiritual evolution. Our spiritual journey
is at once a continuum AND an integration of those ‘rungs’. I am not done with the ‘level’ of the ‘issues of the mind’. The Shadow is the mind. By provoking the Shadow, I am learning my own individualized lessons.
“HEY. There is no such thing as— “a relationship with the divine BEFORE entering a relationship”. That illusion means, you don’t live IN THE PRESENT MOMENT with people, if you are seeking the Divine before entering into a relationship. That baseless ploy means You are living in the superficial superiority of your false ego balloon from past or in future games swirling around in your own tiny head.”
I assumed the context around the sentence would explain that the term “relationship” used meant between a man and a woman. More specifically, a husband and wife relation. Forgive me for not making that more clear.
Gatubela, handle this as you may.
I made a big mistake by sharing anything of value with this person. She obviously can’t empathize with anyone, she obviously has no motive to share authentic experiences, nor is she grateful for anything said from others besides her own script. If their ever was a manifestation of veiled evil in a person, all of us are witnessing that manifestation in the written word of her reality here. Wait a minute… that’s too harsh you say??.. Nah, the most insidious manipulators among us can’t empathize period. They “think” about love, but are not love incarnate, in motion. How could she know love when she has never experienced intimate love, challenge and betrayal? This person has “no use” for anyone who does not fall into line with her loveless deceit. We are witnesses to cold, soulless Infestations of passive, incoherent replies and responses by this person which leave us thinking she’s all sweetness. Yes her game is on display, yes it’s on display, for the surface acceptance to any folk who do not see or want to see.
Still, she tells us blatantly what consciousness means, what life and karma means, what darkness means– even though she has never been kissed and never experienced an intimate relationship which contains pain, illusion, suffering and deceit. More validity there to those who think she’s sweet and harmless. Above all, she knows clearly of her beliefs from non experience. That’s not funny. She has never experienced vice of any kind in life, yet she preaches enthusiastically what virtue is, what darkness is and means. She has mentioned experiencing pain, but “those are private”… so as mentioned before… veiled evil. A fair assessment.
What is Divinity? I never heard her ask that humble question. Of course why would she?… she already knew so why would she care to ask.
Divinity is the breath of ‘being’ in the present moment, present among all people, all living creatures, and whole awareness (completion) within ourselves. The present breath of consciousness is our involvement in Truth. Truth is Not our passive nouning mastery and nouning exhibitions. The Truth has smiled at her truth.
Finally, yes… dimensions of me, my mind, are dark. That’s my nature from birth. Evil is not necessarily the dark, but I’ll quickly show you evil in deceit. Personality deceit, non Godly. Karma is the belief and creation of our lies and the manifestation of our blindness into form, again.. among the complexity of humans– Not by sitting on a yoga mat believing it symbolizes the world. When we believe the manifestations of the lie ‘outside the present breath’ of divinity among people, we actually live the lie. We are then the lie. From the outside illusion of personality, we then “follow our dreams”… no pun.
That’s the ‘normal reality’ out there. No more energy from me.:)
Hello Gatubela,
I have come back and decided to post a part of my response for you. I do not mean to make you wait. My meditations have revealed more to me, so please forgive any contradictions if they arise.
In a truly Conscious state, those emotions/ideas/concepts that rear their ‘ugly’ head are only ‘ugly’ because we think they are. Thus we do not necessarily need the material world and normal interactive experiences on
Earth to face our Shadow. The Shadow is of the MIND.
Thus, we must place our focus on our MIND to make progress while maintaining realization and connection with the Divine.
We do INITIALLY need the “material world and normal interactive experiences’ because it is part of our spiritual evolution. Before initiating a personal spiritual quest, many humans do not realize the Shadow is the mind and not our life circumstances. In the next rung of the metaphorical ladder, we have now learned the lessons we needed to in that ‘previous rung’ and can focus on the real Shadow.
Hmm, here is another metaphor. In my experiences, KY meditations and kriyas can reach AND open up the cellars of our subconscious mind/ego – and not only that – but clean and air them out. Without cleaning, we quiver in Fear and are tormented by our Shadows. In fact, it explains why some of us can be unaware there were any cellars in the first place! lol
However, when Light shines in that one cellar, there becomes no Shadow.
Which is why it can be difficult to use words to describe battles of the mind/Ego.
Of course we experience the ‘consequences’ of opening that cellar in our day-to-day existence. Another “rung” on the metaphorical ladder later, we realize that we must Let Go and Not React. Then there is no concept of positive OR negative karma.
Through further realization via *another* rung, we KNOW that those ‘consequences’ are ultimately not Real and just part of the process. The purifying process of the journey to Merge with the Consciousness/Atman.
——————-
My quote:
“God is beyond man-made concepts and theories. One important step is to realize that is even a concept of Consciousness. Then one step is to KNOW it. But to LIVE it is very difficult.”
Your quote:
“Hmmm, according to the article, all you have to do is just figure out how to live without dualistic illusions. So we are back to the first sentence of this post.”
Consciousness = A realm without dualistic illusions.
My quote “One important step is to realize that is even a concept of (=a realm without dualistic illusions). Then one step is to KNOW (=a realm without dualistic illusions). But to LIVE (=a realm without dualistic illusions] is very difficult.
There is no contradiction.
——————–
“What cycle is that again? Did not catch it”
The cycle of Karma that binds us from realizing Consciousness, etc. I referred to the ‘cycle’ in the final word of the previous quote. (of your original post)
Many (not all) saints and sages of our ages were not married and did not take part of vices. I daresay many of them were not in a relationship in which their husband/wife cheated on them or abused them or in a scenario of passionately kissing a loved one. To me, this does not make their experiences or beliefs any less valid compared to those who did.
Hi Satnam,
My doll spoke unto me, told me things
That I can not repeat, because she speaks only to me
My doll spoke unto me, told me things
That I can not repeat, because she speaks only to me.
She told me such secret things that you can not hear
Confessed me some sins that I prefer not to say
She said some crazy things that I will not tell
We played very hard when talking about very deep topics.
My doll spoke unto me, told me things
That I can not repeat, because she speaks only to me
And although you do not think so, she is very talkative when she speaks of truth.
She knows a lot of stories, and all the dirt from the neighbour
She puts on an innocent face, but she is such a fighter
My doll knows everything,
She is like a tape recorder.
Your doll spoke to you, told you things
That you can’t repeat, because she speaks only to you.
Only me… Only to you
Only me… Only to you
Only me… Only to you
Only, only, only me… Only to you.
Belly laughs!.:)
Thank you Pluto Puppy for your thoughtful words 🙂
Before I discuss my relationship problems, I have certain questions with regard for both you and Gatubela regarding spiritual development..
I recall reading in one of the posts that one’s true self can only be realized if you learn to free yourself from worldly attachments. But what are human bonds without attachment? Can love independent of attachment deliver the same level of intensity and a sense of connection? I experience the depth of human bonds only in relationships where attachment exist. How do we experience spiritual bonding without becoming ‘attached’ to the other person?
Secondly, how easy is it draw the line between respect for self (self-love) and compassion/love for someone else? In some situations, these two experiences become mutually exclusive..How does one resolve the situation of developing a tender understanding with the one who has not treated you rightly? Because in trying to do so, I think I am disrespecting my ownself :s
Can scorpionic energy intuitively sense whether a soul is ‘developed’ and ‘independent’ just alone with the help of a 2 line text message? Does a scorpio needs to be evolved in order to do that?
My relationship is long-distance at the moment. It would have been easier to act out your advice if we together physically. Is there anyone I can show him this kind of understanding long-distance?
After almost 2 months, I texted him last night asking him whether he wants to skype…feeling the harshness in my tone, I sent another message saying that all is cool is at my end and that everything happens for a reason, I’m glad it all happened..He did not reply..but this time, I am not afraid of his cold attitude..I feel that he still lost in his abyss…I will not interfere with his self-development…
I have knocked out most of my fears..I know death is the Great equalizer and the ultimate destination..When I try to feel myself, I feel nothingness inside..a sense of numbness these days..I am trying to figure out how to develop my energies further and what does this nothingness means..
Is there any way I can show him this kind of understanding long-distance?**
(I have a habit of eating up words while typing :p)
Also, I have noticed something very strange. Whenever I am around small kids (2-4 year olds), a slight loving projection of energies on my part even from a distance makes them turn around and chuckle. I feel as they can ‘feel’ my love and are responding to that.
I hope he can feel my loving projections too. 😦
Pluto Puppy,
There is something queer about yours and Gatubela’s way of communicating. Despite reading almost 3/4 of all comments, I cannot verbalize what I have read. The words sink in, create the understanding, yet are almost impossible to express.
The concept of EGO confuses me. How do you actually conceptualize it?
All I have been doing since the past one year is apologizing even when I was the one who got hurt. I surrendered to him. Made myself vulnerable. He told me early on that he feels glad that he did not admit his feelings to his past crushes because he does not want to feel vulnerable.
Sometimes I wonder whether surrendering and saying ‘sorry’ for everything is the solution. It makes me feel like a wimp who has no self-respect of her own. Perhaps I should stop doing this now?
If he’s withdrawn from communicating, don’t say sorry. He has to earn an apology by having the willingness to be mature and communicative in response towards you. You may be too invested in trying to love and understand him more than he is intending his energy back toward you. Don’t let any manipulative pouting, excuses or silences control your feelings. Separate your felt attachments into individualized self-love, always… then feel if he appreciates your intent to care each present moment. If there is no real intent to merge minds and hearts in the present moment, from his level of being, you are hoping for false love to become true. Be above the petty, show him the woman you really are.
Always ask him questions which open up mutual awareness, or truths of the matter that concerns the actual problem, not the petty subject to control. This integrity will enable you to find out the truth about his reality for you. This deeper knowledge will then guide your following choices. Asking questions will give you the spiritual insight to detect if he shows a genuine willingness… or on a darker level, it will show you if the futility of his intentions are to care, or it will clarify his lack of wanting to care for you and the relationship itself.
Dig past petty silences and gain integral answers, no matter how real and painful they could be. You have to be psychologically prepared for the worst in what he is as a person. His worst is- his lower-Scorpion nature to manipulate your feelings and string you along. Stay individualized in your own feelings, don’t lose yourself to passive games and unclear motivations. Be strong and find resolution so you can choose to move on.
That’s what being emotionally independent means.
I am ashamed. I am so sorry.
My personal life had major jolts in the past couple of weeks and I reached a resolution last night. Now I am looking back and cannot believe how arrogant I’ve been here. I’ve been so BLIND. So blind blind blind to my convictions, that I did not realize what I was doing.
This forum is for sharing experiences. Since I was not comfortable with some sharing, I should NOT have posted more than one post. I should have just expressed my gratitude for the posts already written and moved on.
I publicly apologize as I truly became a hypocrite. I do not deserve any respect, compassion, or responses. I did not listen and was so blind. I’m so sorry. I don’t even deserve a Scorpio man ever, because as I see Pluto Puppy’s reactions, he would be disgusted and repelled by me.
I need to repent. I need to change myself. One of my lessons is to keep my convictions to myself. I generally always did until here…but now I realize that when I open myself, I appear to be smugly forcing my convictions. I am not the only way to live. I need to deeply listen and understand other people’s convictions when I help and advise patients.
I cringe at how I have behaved here and I’m so sorry for cluttering this forum and wasting all of your precious energies and time. I was honest when I said I did not feel anger, but I was still so oblivious….I already ended my subscription to this site so I can end this chapter.
I have acted very foolishly and I thank you both for slapping harsh reality back to me. I need to reflect and transform.
I wish you all a beautiful Existence.
Sat Nam. (The truth is really within both of you)
Hi Satnam,
I would like to feel that you are still feeling strong enough to comment and continue exploring yourself, through relating with others.
This is not always a perfect process..but I can truly say, that I tried to understand.
I sat on a mat, and tried to feel like it was more that something to cushion my butt, while practicing various poses – very stiff and awkward let me tell you!!! But I did not feel any communion between me and the mat. i felt it within myself, as you have mentioned in some of your posts.
I was looking at these two phrases:
“One of my lessons is to keep my convictions to myself. I generally always did until here…but now I realize that when I open myself, I appear to be smugly forcing my convictions.”
“So blind blind blind to my convictions, that I did not realize what I was doing.”
Girl….you got problems, of which you are blind to!!!! That mat must be really doing over time!
Your convictions have made you feel just awful, since they have not provided you with the necessary tools to deal with ….yourself.
I am ashamed.
cannot believe how arrogant I’ve been
I’ve been so BLIND.
I did not realize what I was doing.
I was not comfortable with some sharing,
I truly became a hypocrite.
I do not deserve any respect, compassion, or responses
I don’t even deserve a Scorpio man ever,
he would be disgusted and repelled by me.
I need to repent.
I need to change myself.
I appear to be smugly forcing my convictions.
I cringe at how I have behaved here
but I was still so oblivious….
I have acted very foolishly
So, what are those convictions again? They have only given you pain and suffering, with you conveniently being unable to love yourself.
They turned you into a monster.
Hi Again Satnam,
Am still trying to feel you….
Once you see where your shadow is, you will begin to feel how to manifest your path as best as you can.
All you need is the will to do it. I don´t feel that you understand what it means to apply your will. But if you return to comment, I am sure you will have a sense of what it means to do it. You will feel what your teachers and wise ment, were trying to tell you – and us.
At this moment, I did feel that I could try to do yoga and meditate a bit more…it felt very nice to feel what you feel. Even though you are unable to maintain it as a daily, walking state of being. Which is what your sages were really after.
I personally feel that there is beauty in the teachings of the sages and wise people that you mention…if soulfully felt through the good and the bad.
I don´t feel that they were crushed and resorted to self destruction, when faced with a conflict. That is why they become a source of divine inspiration, adding divine truthes to this very mundane world we have.
Disperse those mists that are clouding your divine vision. It is actually a huge No No, to not love yourself.
So, come back and keep on commenting.
Oh, and Pluto Puppy? This might resonate with how you feel about me. It made me smile.
Hi Pluto Puppy
I have just read this whole blog over two days and your comments are amazing and insighful
I would like to ask your thoughts and feelings on a situation Im going though with a Scorpio male
Is it ok to email you?
Your wisdom will be much appreciated.
Pisces Blu
Pisces Blu feel free to ask away or contact me. There is plenty of material written on here so maybe I’ve addressed your concerns already.
Miss. Pink
“…I recall reading in one of the posts that one’s true self can only be realized if you learn to free yourself from worldly attachments…”
Well, No… not entirely detaching from tangible form in daily living. Happiness is felt within material accomplishments, certainly… BUT those personality/ego freedoms do not identify us, or encompass who we truthfully are far beneath the skin (or seen).
Things, money and people success through the material realm does free us in soul of the ancient survival fears which naturally haunt every human thorough life, so those indulgent “ego-identifications to things” does not define our soulful essence, nor does it manifest our human consciousness through heart and bravery among challenge, hardship and struggle. Ego freedom is material freedom accomplished in the known (seen) world.
Freedom however… in virtue of my specific soul path, has been identified through obliterating past ego (tangible) freedoms of survival, fear of lack, and conquest for more (greed), into states of spiritual perception/identification to a world which is felt and extremely instinctual within each present moment (the truth). So having lived these extreme experiences, having examined them for what they mean, evolves my identification and understanding “of Truths” beyond the material plane we comfortably accept and glorify. The material plane is extremely limited of higher truths through the mythical personalities of the collective mind- our created cultures. So freedom to me now on my path (has not always been) is a relationship with divine power within and on many levels.
…”But what are human bonds without attachment?…”
We need attachment, definitely. But not only for the subconscious motivation to feed the-self of comforting illusion. We must identify or feel much greater forces in others, in us, and around us, and beyond the insignificance of our whims, complaints, frustrations, fears and unconscious desires.
…”Can love independent of attachment deliver the same level of intensity and a sense of connection?…”
Yes, independent soulful love, detached from subconscious osmosis and dysfunction with “the other’s” personality configuration… is infinitely greater than blind attachments of ego/personality style love.
The latter here in this comment “is known” (not present in breath and vision with God) when relating. The former “is unknown” in realms (in present breath with God). When we can love fully and fearlessly IN BOTH light and dark truths, we are at One with God Source. Both intimately personal, and soulfully universal among all human beings and living creatures. The intensity of this state is revered and humbled once both worlds are incorporated into our daily life.
…”I experience the depth of human bonds only in relationships where attachment exist. How do we experience spiritual bonding without becoming ‘attached’ to the other person?…”
Attachment is (or means) the known (of personality). There’s no logical explanation or reasoning to detached yet intensely personal loving in my reality. We as soul grounded humans have to be in constant union to powerfully felt energies, instinctual messages, higher voices of integrity and truth understood within our existence. This requires a quiet or STILL MIND and heart. These descriptions I’m sharing are manifestations of powerful awareness both seen and unseen. So answering this question is simpler for those who understand abstract realities, via tough experience and people who can delve (empathize) the True reality as it exists for another in the present breath.
“…Secondly, how easy is it draw the line between respect for self (self-love) and compassion/love for someone else? In some situations, these two experiences become mutually exclusive..How does one resolve the situation of developing a tender understanding with the one who has not treated you rightly? Because in trying to do so, I think I am disrespecting my ownself…”
A spiritual connection is understood if the partner ‘responds’ on the same level, or plane of existence (their reality). Disrespecting ourselves means actually being blind to our higher mind/heart, and our higher potential from flawed human beings. Ego expects perfection of self. And ego expects perfection of the Other. That’s the illusion. Divinity, divine consciousness and bravery submits (SURRENDERS THE PERSONALITY) to the forces of God. Again, it’s another abstract experience, not a memorized script of what we think divinity is. We are the divine. The challenge becomes… does your guy know the divine?… answer… probably not, or never. He has to want that salvation and transformation, or it must be pre-ordained in him since birth from the womb. The truth is many male Scorpios are incapable of killing (changing) their personality into a higher appreciation of being for their existence. Remember the attached material world is a world inside a tiny bubble. People do not recognize much in their lives beyond their own neurosis. So if you want a higher plane male Scorpio, you may need to feel their plight, their intimate knowledge of themselves, rather than rationalizing their limitations of consciousness. When you can accept and move on in life, you’ll see yourself growing independent of wanting a relationship to fulfill personal emptiness. Find yourself through a greater existence, then treat each moment with care, discretion and detachment from outcome. Faith baby. It’s not logical.
“…Can scorpionic energy intuitively sense whether a soul is ‘developed’ and ‘independent’ just alone with the help of a 2 line text message? Does a scorpio needs to be evolved in order to do that?…”
Hahaha, no. It depends on the person. Reading another’s Soul is not taught in school or university. Expect very little in terms of his evolution Miss. Pink.
“…I sent another message saying that all is cool is at my end and that everything happens for a reason, I’m glad it all happened..He did not reply..but this time, I am not afraid of his cold attitude..I feel that he still lost in his abyss…I will not interfere with his self-development…”
Excellent ‘response’ to the present. Forcing his love for you is the accepted practice of superficial love. Letting things unfold as they may is your acknowledgement of a higher power who is really the One pulling the strings.
Most events in our life… or circumstances or things ‘which happen’… are not in our control, IF we know we have honored the god of love in the present moment.
Hi Cancer,
“Find yourself through a greater existence, then treat each moment with care, discretion and detachment from outcome. Faith baby. It’s not logical. ”
Faith….It will feel like this….and you will see what has to be done. It will help you understand that paradox a bit more.
See how he grabs his heart? And dares to do the impossible (intangible, unknown, and completely invisible), because he loves his dad?
His own death, at the moment of stepping off the cliff, did not matter.
Is it not a violation of self-love?
I find it hard to determine where to draw the lines..
The “violation” would be if he had listened to the guy telling him to retreat back away from the ledge. Had he decided that, he would have betrayed the faith in a higher power far greater than his original understanding when he said to himself “this is impossible!!”.
To “determine” any situation or circumstance… is to rationalize….Is to doubt…. Is to validate the fear of death of the personality.
The clip symbolizes what death means and the courage it takes to welcome it, in order to transform ones logical doubt of the unseen realm.
Hi Cancer and P.Puppy,
“To “determine” any situation or circumstance… is to rationalize….Is to doubt…. Is to validate the fear of death of the personality.”
Hmmmm…..
As an intermediate step between death of personality and life of it…
…. to be ATTACHED to any determination or rationalization, will be a roller coaster experience, as one spirals towards TRUTH. You have to know how to release these illusions by not clinging to them.
You will have the sensation of paradox as truthes begin to interface with your “reality”. There is actually a “conflict”.
So how do you handle your conflicts? Is it by feeling love in your heart? Or is it something more negative?
Trusting your heart and feeling love, not as a result of Mr. Scorpio, but as an intrinsic part of yourself and BEING, clears up a lot of mumbo jumbo out there….And if there has been a “violation”, it won´t follow any rules that are currently used to determine it…
The answers have to come from you. This way, you won´t feel confused.
Bottom-line: Clear the noise from your head and follow your heart..
I believe that rationality is the enemy of truth. It’s range of perception is limited yet it appears too ‘real’. I always feel troubled when rationalizing too much..
The road to spiritual awakening is dense. Yesterday, I felt body chills (shivers) throughout the day without any known reason. It was Mr. Scorpio’s birthday. Rationality gave me a million reasons to ignore whereas the heart was swept away by a wave of dense agitation and an overwhelming sensation. I felt lost in my own abyss without any questions or answers. I followed the heart and wished him. I felt relatively better.
I do not understand the waves of discomfort and a sinking sensation that sweep me off from reality. They come and go as they wish. I cannot even predict now how I will feel a few seconds from now on.
All these strange experiences started ever since I fell in love with Mr. Scorpio.
Gatubela, I agree there is a paradox between the spirit and the mind. The struggle becomes tenuous when you are trying to feel the answers to your situation, and you feel..’nothingness’
Without courage in life, our soul paths are mortal, limited to self-created illusions and the acceptance of those myths here on deceptive earth. The lie is believed as truth. Again, if our willpower is unable evoke courage and we fail to wake up… we then “think” in terms of “violation” and “wrongness”.
i love dancing to this song
Hi Cancer,
“Bottom-line: Clear the noise from your head and follow your heart..”
Or what ever you happen to feel is present, when clearing your head….striving perhaps, at first to stick to a preliminary concept of virtue. For example, if you make a simple promise of “I won´t speak in anger.” You will soon see how hard it is to do this, and what it takes in order to NOT speak in anger. However, you may also learn great lessons in compassion for people who are angry, as you realize that perfection is not something that can be defined. This will be based on the one mistake you make and how you treat yourself to your own personal mistakes.
Do you treat yourself with gentleness and love? Do you become more determined? Do you make different goals? Try to not limit yourself, and feel love. Those feelings that Satnam mentioned, are very common when dealing with yourself. You need to know that feeling shame or guilt, is not a solution. It is an act of cowardice towards yourself, because you are preferring to empower the negative. This is SO easy to do, and that is why it is done as a first and very seductive, blinding way of resolving and LIVING our lives.
Therefore, if you are not feeling love or keeping yourself there, expect those scorpionic “under everything you know” – ( I emphasize “KNOW” and not FEEL) kicks in the ass, as you REEL in pain, due to having to face what you ARE. In the paradox state, the best navegator in my experience, has been by feeling love and DOING what it takes to stay there. Therefore, by you being in the paradox state, I already know that you are fluctuating betwen cowardice, and actually doing what you ALREADY FEEL has to be done.
There are no right or wrong answers…
“I believe that rationality is the enemy of truth. It’s range of perception is limited yet it appears too ‘real’. I always feel troubled when rationalizing too much.”
Alright…but there is a slight difference between what we are doing and what you are. Feeling the truth from your soul….and RAISING it from your soul to your mind, in an effort to communicate these truthes. We already know, that you may interpret it one way or the other and what we are saying may not even be relevant. This is why you must begin to FEEL yourself….as we all have special gifts and uniqueness.
“I felt lost in my own abyss without any questions or answers. I followed the heart and wished him. I felt relatively better.”
Well feeling better may not be the goal. Don´t forget that there are many ways to “FEEL BETTER”, right? The goal could be to know yourself…and trust this knowledge based on feeling LOVE /GOD. But I am glad that you felt what it means to follow your heart. It just changes your way of seeing things, and doing things, that you “thought” were impossible.
“I do not understand the waves of discomfort and a sinking sensation that sweep me off from reality. They come and go as they wish. I cannot even predict now how I will feel a few seconds from now on.”
Oh….you begin to learn to handle yourself, when not feeling “safe”. I was not “safe” for 15 years. Hmmmmm….. what to do? How was i going to LIVE in my daily existance and being. If you FEEL yourself, perhaps you will understand the difference in the QUALITY of living and the actions you are choosing to do, based on trusting yourself, and opting for succumbing to pain, anger, needy dependency or any other “options” of BEING that are out there. Some more “OUT THERE” than others. Don´t listen to what you see out there, in order to make a decision on how to treat someone you love. FEEL yourself.
“Gatubela, I agree there is a paradox between the spirit and the mind. The struggle becomes tenuous when you are trying to feel the answers to your situation, and you feel..’nothingness’”
Oh…we are back to the faith thingy again. Eventually, you will have to DO it. Love is how you do things. In the video, if you look at it, he chooses love (it was greater than his fear) and jumps out, because of it. This is so foreign to us, that it is scarey.
Miss Pink and all other wily females,
Identifying self-awareness is really about trusting gut feelings, trusting heart felt intelligence in the moment. Most people listen to and completely follow the noise in their heads. Talk about distortions!! Manifesting the constant noise in our heads and following the fear (doubt, peer pressure) within our hearts to speak honestly with others… is not honored.
Building a spiritual relationship with yourself takes time and self-forgiveness. The ego (our noise attached to futile chatter) is always fearful of what it does not want to accept or understand. Allow the tenderness of your emotional heart to be penetrated by uncomfortable truths. The idea is to heal through feeling as a result of truths discovered on your life. Yet you must constantly have a consciousness, or feeling of when you’re afraid, and why you’re afraid. Much of this healing process requires long periods of solitude, and a relationship with your own thought paradigms. I’m lucky because by nature, I am introverted, constantly introspective… so you might not have the psychological tools or arsenal to heal any blind choices which are causing your vulnerability and confusion. Your path will need psychological weapons to handle any pain, sorrow or discomfort. So that will depend on your nature, your soul path bestowed while in the womb for the journey of “this life”.
One other thing guys which I feel is missing in many social dynamics and meaningful relating with people and loved ones; And that is the gift of Communication. Without a conscious effort to express intuitive communication with another, the growth and development of that relationship is damaged and distorted due to the lack of mutual abilities to communicate effectively. The intention to communicate with brave integrity is taken for granted by most. Thus most babble the manifestations of the noise humming through their bubble personality. Communicating with loving intent no matter how negative, is the glue for transformative and healing togetherness.
It always takes two souls for that tango to work.
Bunnies please don’t cry.
Scorpio’s are true HEART BRAKERS
Pluto Puppy,
With reference to your post 1080…
“When the illusions of not being able to change her current or past male lovers into her life-long dream partner hits home… the little stinker goes looking for another guy of very similar psycho-sexual-emotional temperament, in blind hopes to change and manipulate that guy into something he’s really not.”
I did every thing you mentioned before this statement..except for this one..I have no intentions to seek someone else..His brutal honesty has helped me evolve into someone I never was..The intensity of my love changed me rather than breaking me..I have learnt how to practise forgiveness, kindness, and restrain..In the process of my emotional turmoil, I became a pillar of strength..How can you love soulfully if you start hunting for other guys if your needs go unsatisfied? Love is not about satisfying needs, its about creating synergy…Its about feeling and sharing the warmth even when your Mr. Scorpio is in one of his cold moods..
The world is a fool to think that if someone makes us feel good, he’s worth pursuing, else he should be replaced with someone who does…As long as you identify a connection with someone, and you know in some corner of your heart ‘This is it, my search is over, I can spend my life with this person’, you should tame yourself according to the situation…I use positive affirmations and dream beautiful thoughts to kindle the loving in me…True love is courageous and rests on faith … the world may see you crying and think that you are falling apart, but you know deep inside that those tears are just a manifestation of sadness and that you as a pillar of strength still remain intact…it’s about not talking for days at length yet feeling the presence of that someone constantly within you..
Those who think Mr. Scorpio is brutal should open their eyes to the lessons that their experience with scorpio wants to teach them…In Universe, there are no coincidences…True strength is like a phoenix that is reborn in burnt ashes..
Im glad Mr. Scorpio came into my life…I cried for almost an year at every hurtful blow his coldness gave me but today I love him more for teaching me unconsciously through his energy, how to BE.
“…How can you love soulfully if you start hunting for other guys if your needs go unsatisfied? ”
Superficial love everywhere does just that. Hunting and searching and playing. The physical and seen perceptions of male and female attractiveness are not examined or probed for a soul truth beneath the facade or image. That attraction to the seen physical is actual normalcy out there among vast social cultures.
Well you then understand what is real in the present moment within yourself and within others. That is soulful intelligence. You can identify what all kinds of feelings mean. So you trust yourself (courage) to emerge through “coldness” and piercing honesty. Most gorgeous, sexual energy women simply don’t want the obstacles of reality to deal with. Thus the ego need for super safety with men, things, entertainment, friends and family dynamics, and the comforts of mind these “birds of a feather” acceptances imbibe. These tentative personality comforts connect each superficial reality as “personality compatibility” which maintains the delicate self-involvement bubble in tact.
You’ve grown mightily through heart and soul. You’ve found love is greater than yourself. Your experiences with a quality person have taught you to love fearlessly. Good for you sweetheart.
Hi Cancer….
“The world is a fool to think that if someone makes us feel good, he’s worth pursuing, else he should be replaced with someone who does”.
People are not always going to make you feel good, for the rest of your life. Understanding this is important. If we are only with someone who makes us feel good, then this is the soil in which we are planting the relationship. You will base all future wrong doings and injuries, based in this initial state of illusion, and eventually, through a “socially” accepted form of victimization and empty justification, you will seek illusionary cathartic transformation of your current illusionary situation. It will seem very REAL as the emotions you feel, will be actually VALIDATED in society. They are actually already listed out on a piece of paper, and have been put in textbooks. Your condition and being has been systemized by statistical tendencies of “the people you see everyday on the streets…but never get to really know them”.
However, once you reach union with your soul, you are not “HALF” of who you really and truly are. The complete story is the UNION of our dual nature and arriving to balance, through surrendering to LOVE – GOD.
You will begin to see your true nature. In my case, I was married to a guy that never made me feel “good” in any way and was always selfishly pushing my limits, due to his own cosmic sized cowardness to act virtuously.
When you see your true nature, you will understand what is worth soulfully protecting. And you will handle yourself in a way, that does not truly doubt when you have to use that cosmic 9 mm hidden in your frilly bunny-fuzz lined bra, you will.
“People are not always going to make you feel good, for the rest of your life. Understanding this is important.”
She does completely understand it. That’s why she wrote that specific expression. Her entire posts speaks of the antithesis you explain above.
You didn’t understand her, dear Gatubela.
Hi P.Puppy,
Thanks for speaking on her behalf. Are you accusing me of Leonine bossyness? LoL!!! Will review the situation carefully.
I understand. I just need her to comment for herself, so that I can see what might have been misunderstood. Antithesis? Ouch. Kitty cat feels bad.
Darn…I even toned it down from what I originally wrote.
Cancer….write please!!!!
Gatubela,
Your post expanded the horizons of my soulful understanding…
There are certain things we know subtly, but here someone else verbalize them reinforces them in our minds…
🙂
Pluto Puppy,
Yes, you have understood me as finely as my Mr. Scorp did ! When I first admitted my feelings to him, he screened my weaknesses with his piercing energy and put them on the table in front of me..at that time, I was too impulsive and emotionally immature to understand what he truly meant..when I did not listen, he turned cold on me…but I have experienced the chunk of my transformation after reading through yours and gatubela’s comments..Thank you so much for being there for humanity..
It feels beautiful to nurture virtue that is going to chase you even in eternity when all else fails away..these certificates, professional achievements, bank balances, and looks are just our temporary companions of survival in this short life..it feels good to be forgiving and gentle towards your enemies, and help them feel, with your nurturing and powerful soul presence , where they are going wrong…
I was facing problems at work due to the hypocritical attitude of my boss..once I started transforming, I internally guided myself to emit love and nurturing kindness…that day when I left, my boss saluted me for no reason…I was truly shocked with the impact my energy had generated…
Pluto Puppy, may I ask you what literature you referred to that has helped you evolve so beautifully?
I had always wanted to be a loving and a simple person..In my fantasies, I see my doppelganger spread across the skies with a face exuding warmth…I use that fantasy to heal my wounds…At times I wish i were an angel who knew no sin..It’s sad to see myself returning back to my sinful human form from time to time…
I have being going into phases of depression from time to time…
Yesterday, I just got rejected from my dream college..I had such a firm faith that I will get in..I kept using emotional visualization techniques, kept praying…
Then all of a sudden everything shatters..
I’m a zealous person..love plus achievement completes me…at the moment, both of my slots are empty…
It was hard standing up on my feet again..but I keep on reaffirming to myself that my faith is immortal…no matter what happens, I will no let it go..
Sometimes I feel that God has His own plans for our lives…our paths are pre-determined somehow..its hard keeping yourself together in the face of this unpredictability..
Gatubela, I admire your courage…As I mentioned earlier, you are that phoenix of strength who was reborn in the ashes of struggle…
I have let go of my fear of death too..Because I believe that eternity is more important..I try to be a better person so that if I die on any given day, I should have no regrets…
Restrain confers power..I learnt this from this blog only..Im trying to practise this too..
I love writing and reading this blog..you people know what it is to live a soulful life..the masses don’t…everyone around me represents the sleeping masses…
Sometimes I wish I could help my loved ones transform…for e.g. my mom..but she doesn’t understand what I am talking about..because she doesn’t feel the dimensions of a soulful existence…I hear her ranting about life and its miseries..but there is nothing I can do about it..or maybe I can?
“but there is nothing I can do about it..or maybe I can?”
What are you feeling with regards to this? Can you face yourself and what it means to have someone ranting?
this whole internet new world order is starting to really piss me off.going is the day where people actually have real contact anymore or make phonecalls..yeah and the fucking phone companies making millions from mobile phones etc and the costs of a call ridiculous. its so fucked.and they just get away with it.you see where this is all heading..?mass mind control and universal apathy ///
I didn’t progress far with the two Scorpio men that I dearly wished to date. The human connection was strong, the physical attraction irresistible, but I am a Pisces… I could see past all the declarations of no emotional baggage (see below), past the ‘always friends’ on their part, past the outward strength to the inner insecurities and turmoil. They didn’t like that, after all, remember the secretive nature of the Scorpio: no one has a prerogative to understand him as well as he understands himself. One said to me ‘The minute you walked through my door I knew it – you, I, the same’. Well, not quite…
Both were on Match, both said ‘left emotional baggage at the front door’, and it transpired that the hold of the ex on their psyche was strong.
Scorpio No. 1 went back to her after a year’s separation (she cheated) and now is suspecting that she is cheating again. Scorpio No.2 was dropped by someone he thought was his true soul mate in a year long relationship. Three months on he is going through scores of women, bedding them and waiting for the kick in the stomach to catch ‘true love’, that gut feeling that Scorpio men are so reliant on. If this doesn’t happen instantly, the minute he sees you (he has Mars in Scorpio too) – you are yesterday’s news and will not progress further than a one night stand.
What I have learned from this….
1. Scorpio men do not play games. What we perceive as games is their propensity to go with the flow of emotions, which, in their case, are powerful and complex. If he is warm and cuddly one day – it is because he feels like that AT THIS MOMENT IN TIME. It may change tomorrow, some other course or person is worthy of their attention that day, so he will be cold and disinterested.
2. Scorpio love is essentially selfish in nature, sorry, Pluto Puppy, despite all the preaching of understanding the nature of higher love. Scorpio men express their love only if they NEED something from you. If they are in love with you – their determination knows no bounds, they need you in their life and they will take no for an answer. This, in itself, is a selfish act, and as a Pisces, I resent it, because I understand the meaning of universal love for all. All my past loves are there in my life in one form or another, because I will always love them in some way – for who they are, if not romantically. On the contrary, a Scorpio, once he lost an interest, whether in friendship or love – does not NEED you anymore in his life and will move on swiftly. Dropping people off by way of ignoring them completely – this is the one tool they use very successfully.
3. No.2 taught me a bit about myself. Specifically, about the power of my sexuality and the attraction of my passionate nature to men, which I have never realised I had before and NEVER used to my advantage. Yes, he has power of the same kind (Oh that Mars in Scorpio…), but he is very aware of it and milks it for all its worth. Fair play, but not everyone is as evolved as myself, and he leaves a trail of emotionally wrecked women behind, which again – I resent on their behalf, not on mine, because I am grateful for the lessons that I learned from my encounters with these men.
4. Respect for another’s ways is paramount, and if you fail to treat your Scorpio with utter respect AND judge them for their circuitous path through life – you will be yesterday’s news in an instant. No.2 said to me ‘You are one of the wisest people I know, and I respect and value you more than most’. Even if he said such sweet things to you – again, it might be different tomorrow, he meant it the day he said it, and no more. Tomorrow he might hate your guts. He will definitely hate your guts if you crowd him, look for attention, chase, tell him about your feelings when he is not quite sure about his own yet, make remarks which (in his eyes) are demeaning even if you didn’t mean it that way…. And lots of other little and big things which tell you HE IS SUPER SENSITIVE! Be careful what you say, the interpretation of it might be NOT what you meant to convey.
5. Despite all the above I love Scorpio men for the true beauty, strength and depth of their characters. I just have to find the one who will be a perfect match to me. No.1 was in terms of interests, spirituality, values. No.2 was a powerful sexual attraction with the depth of perception I rarely see in people. It was fun and meaningful, even if it didn’t develop into something greater, the fusion into One which both our signs desire so much. Another day.
Hi Inessology,
Universal love is not just a Piscean state of being, nor are we limitted to the piscean way of expressing it. The reason being, is that we are not in a Utopia. We can all FEEL that we are ONE…but expressing it as “keeping your loves in your life one form or the other”…is your FREEDOM to choose, under the idea of free will. Resenting the actions or choices of another person goes against “loving them for their beauty, strength and depth of their characters”.
Plutonic energy will only emphasize what already has existed, in your choices you made in these men. When dealing with universal forces, unless you have chosen surrendering to LOVE/ GOD´s will, you will attract illusion, and not truth.
So… “It was fun and meaningful.”
This may not have gone well with Plutonian relationship fusion physics.
Universal love, is something which embraces each of our uniqueness while feeling unity and striving to eliminate negativity. You ARE love.
Being able to become one, is actually a SEPARATE state of being, based on our surrender to our own divine feminine forces to the divine masculine.
It requires constantly grounding yourself…into your harsh reality of WHO you are and who HE is, loving and accepting it.
Also, I could be a bit wrong with regards to other signs, but it means that you stand on your own as a complete person, embracing your own masculine energies as well. You must be ready to ACT and fight for the dynamic, through love and trusting your own heart energies, and not just passively judge. Most of the things that you have mentioned are not even “cosmic offences” and do not violate any energies that prevent merging into ONE.
The beauty of soulful love, is that the heart knows and the universe supports these energies, through your surrender to GOD.
We can not tippy toe around scorpio. We surrender to our love and let their probing warrior natures penetrate through mutual search for intimacy and union.
I am sorry about your two scorpio guys…but you may need to work on your own energies and eliminate latent negativity.
1. “Resenting the actions or choices of another person goes against “loving them for their beauty, strength and depth of their characters”.” I don’t think so. Resentment is the result of deep disagreement with how someone conducts themselves, and if their actions are harmful to others – I reserve this right to disagree and am not in a position to offer support. I would be, however, in a position to make my disapprovement known to the person, without judgment. We learn from each other’s interactions, and I would interact.
2. You didn’t make any comment on the women that fall into Scorpio No.2 bed AND fall out faster than you can say ‘hop’. I do not accept this, as there are consequences of such actions which create negativity in itself (and not in any way latent, let me reassure you!).
3. Fun and meaningful – a figure of speech. He also learned a lot as a result, after all he did say ‘I love Your Beautiful Mind’, not once. But than added ‘But I am not in love’. The thing is I bruised his ego considerably, not intentionally, but it happened. He couldn’t handle NOT being the alpha male that he thinks he is. Funnily enough, I do think that he is an alpha male
4. When I suggested we be friends, and let’s exclude sex from it, we have a bond of a different kind’, his response was ‘Don’t come here expecting celibacy’. Friend with benefits? Not acceptable to me, considering all other ‘interests’ in his life. Friend without benefits? Not acceptable to him. Hence, friends no more in any shape or form. I think it is a pity, because we had much to give to each other as two humans who are essentially singing the same tune. THAT, the same expectations not expressed directly – was the undoing of us.
5. “Universal love, is something which embraces each of our uniqueness while feeling unity and striving to eliminate negativity. You ARE love.” Agree. But, as above, when the uniqueness of the individual causes misery to others AND he realises that… He did say he is a predator and knows his power.
6. “Most of the things that you have mentioned are not even “cosmic offences” and do not violate any energies that prevent merging into ONE.” I would be grateful if you defined precisely what such energies you have in mind. Precisely, as I cannot comment otherwise. And… Cosmic or not – they are offences. Offences of others who may not be as smart, or evolved or looking for universal truth. Do you take advantage of disadvantaged people in any way? You may say they CHOOSE to be disadvantaged, BUT they are out there, do not touch. It is not a Scorpio man’s right to teach lessons on the back of their power. How about a little bit of humility?
7. You didn’t make any comment on the selfish kind of love that Scorpio projects, out of the NEED to be with another. Their OWN need, not the need of the other. How about that?
I apologise in advance if my comments are a bit straight forward, I don’t like to play games with pretty expressions of higher concepts. Reality bites you in the ass.
Thank you, Gatubela, your input is something that makes me…. smile. And grateful that you give your time to contribute. I am learning, but in my own unique way.
Also, as a Pisces I am afraid I have a very approximate idea of what EGO is. Your comment below mentions “They can heal and transform themselves and the others through connecting, engaging and obliterating the illusions of wishful ego ideologies mentioned above.”My interaction with Scorpio No. 2 Mars in Scorpio in fact had an opposite effect and GAVE me ego. Knowing what I am and that my wishes and desires are as valis as anyone else’s. I didn’t have that kind of notion before.
A “disagreement” is egoistically missing the soulful point. Where in your language do you engage your experiences with us as people? IN THE PRESENT MOMENT? Your “opinions” separate you from universal soul, separate you from the potential of death of futile thinking, opinions and debate do as they do among little brains… and you wonder why in your first sentence you said– ” I didn’t progress far with the two Scorpio men that I dearly wished to date.”
Yeah, “wishing” is your illusion FOR REAL RELATING. Go figure. Being, however… is something you’re not. As a person you’re stuck in your head about how love is… or what love and integrity is or should be… that way you can pretend “to understand” males and pretend to not want to feel the cowardice in yourself. Nothing unusual about that balloon in people. If you are so disappointed in male Scorpios for not understanding your separation from the divine, you should simply move on to another male you can prove wrong and control, and feel “universal love for”. THAT GUY IS EVERYWHERE FOR YOU. He will coddle your sexuality and make you happy. He will coddle your political intent to abuse him and control him via the veil of your sexuality, political intentions and looks. So why invest your utopia with a male Scorpio who knows the harsh realities, cruelties, injustices, self-interest, greed, insecurities and deceptions for control over others IN THIS REAL WORLD AMONG HUMANS??… a male Scorpio who sees beyond your transparent self-created comforting illusions? You seem to be very comfortable in that existence. Again, no surprise here. It is shown in your dialogue. You don’t deserve a male who moves you, who transforms your rigid INTENTIONS to separate. You are, in this present moment, ego personified through your language and naivety of what divinity and love ISN’T. Why hypocritically invest your rightness about your subjective, loveless experiences with male Scorpios? To prove us wrong? Ha. Fitting… like a crown.
Yet another person who says ‘they understand’ themselves deeply and the Scorpionic psyche for social approval and political games… yet is Edging-God-Out ( ego) through the verb of their ‘present’ communication.
No more from me. If you can’t love and resolve any negative energy throughout life, you’re an utter fool. WHY?
Because negative, immature, frightened energy EXISTS in this life among humans. It’s as Natural like the sunlight and the seasons. Denying the existence of discomfort and pathological self-lies in yourself is not my problem. And you wonder why we leave you cold for ever.
Reap what you sow. Even Pisces you, can’t understand that in yourself.
“..I apologise in advance if my comments are a bit straight forward, I don’t like to play games with pretty expressions of higher concepts. Reality bites you in the ass…”
Ah, NO… you’re not sorry from a genuine place. Ignoramus… you’re not sorry at all, try sorry that you’re a bad game player. Just another manipulative attempt from someone who is clueless about their reality. Again… transparency.
It’s that kind of smug hypocrisy which causes your illusions and results with male Scorpio.
Hi,
Will comment a bit for now…
1. “Resenting the actions or choices of another person goes against “loving them for their beauty, strength and depth of their characters”.” I don’t think so. Resentment is the result of deep disagreement with how someone conducts themselves, and if their actions are harmful to others – I reserve this right to disagree and am not in a position to offer support. I would be, however, in a position to make my disapprovement known to the person, without judgment. We learn from each other’s interactions, and I would interact.
Alright…we will go for reality…
Life is too damn short for me to truly disagree, especially when I trust myself and my own universe. There is more out there for me than someone´s behavior. That is very insignificant to me…not when I hear those angels singing. It´s how I got through 14 years of hell. Someone´s behavior will not override my connection to GOD.
2. You didn’t make any comment on the women that fall into Scorpio No.2 bed AND fall out faster than you can say ‘hop’. I do not accept this, as there are consequences of such actions which create negativity in itself (and not in any way latent, let me reassure you!).
We choose who we relate with, and for our own reasons. It depends on your soul path. What you initially chose when you decided to get to know the guy. Why are you choosing a guy that hops faster than you do?
Yeah, it is latent. Because you are choosing a guy, while not being connected to GOD. Get to know yourself better and figure this out. If you don´t accept this, then let your “yes be yes” and your “no be no”…
…and ENOUGH already!
A guy that wants to be with other women, is doing his thing, I am sure. And so are those women. The consequences are part of this “great world we live in” and our conformity to it. If you are beginning to not accept certain things, then continue…great!!! Is it a repeating cycle in your love life?
I can´t make a comment on a guy who knows what kind of women he is sleeping with. But if you want a committed relationship, then of course, you would not try to “hook” a guy who won´t commit. You will let him go, and leave it to GOD to heal you for doing what was asked, if you were following these powerful energies in the first place.
You seem pretty strong…
3. Fun and meaningful – a figure of speech. He also learned a lot as a result, after all he did say ‘I love Your Beautiful Mind’, not once. But than added ‘But I am not in love’. The thing is I bruised his ego considerably, not intentionally, but it happened. He couldn’t handle NOT being the alpha male that he thinks he is. Funnily enough, I do think that he is an alpha male.
I am struggling with your insistence in thinking….but I can understand that there could be more that I am not seeing…
For me, Alpha is a societal concept, not a soulful one. And for scorpio, I feel that it is completely internally based.
Ego has no place in these concepts. Alpha and omega are complements, not contradictory. If he has ego to bruise, then he will have to strive to erradicate it.
If you are placing ego here, then yeah, there will probably be no love…and a lot of thinking.
You could be paying attention to this:
” Even if he said such sweet things to you – again, it might be different tomorrow, he meant it the day he said it, and no more. Tomorrow he might hate your guts. He will definitely hate your guts if you crowd him, look for attention, chase, tell him about your feelings when he is not quite sure about his own yet, make remarks which (in his eyes) are demeaning even if you didn’t mean it that way…. And lots of other little and big things which tell you HE IS SUPER SENSITIVE! Be careful what you say, the interpretation of it might be NOT what you meant to convey.”
Or…you could be doing this:
“So if a human HAS NOT actually lived through and fought enough of these conjured illusions, destroyed them for what they are…then he or she is not seeing life and death for what it actually IS within ones SOUL battlefield, not ones ego illusions to study virtue and being ‘superior’ among those who do not pray and those who do not volunteer their time to help. If from the soul consciousness of NOT FEARING inevitable death, this enables a person to make change in the human world one breath at time… through their soul-being among humans. They can heal and transform themselves and the others through connecting, engaging and obliterating the illusions of wishful ego ideologies mentioned above.”
Or this:
“It feels beautiful to nurture virtue that is going to chase you even in eternity when all else fails away….it feels good to be forgiving and gentle towards your enemies, and help them feel, with your nurturing and powerful soul presence , where they are going wrong…”
You submit to his higher self…if you have the ability to see it. You did not perceive this precious gift?
Hmmm….Mars in Scorpio…he will have an effect on you. So take these experiences, place them in yourself, as if he is literally inside you (no pun intended), and RAISE the frequency. It is a type of inner alchemy. You are the guardian of his energy and actually, you will have to protect it, as if you would protect yourself…… TRANSFORM IT AND GIVE BACK. Don´t be distracted by surface noise. This requires you to be a bit of an expert yourself. And to know how it is to walk through death calmly. He may think you are not passionate perhaps….but you will be holding his energy.
It is his job to get to your passion and unlock it.
You don´t do it to get the guy….you do it, because you love him.
You don´t feel love in your heart? Then you missed out on universal love.
You submit to his higher self…if you have the ability to see it. You did not perceive this precious gift? – He didn’t want me to submit. He didn’t love me in a sense of ‘being in love’. He loved me as someone who doesn’t judge. Who accepts his unique ways. Who understands his inner nature.
It is his job to get to your passion and unlock it. – There was no need for him to unlock my passion. It is always there in everything I do, including, but not exclusively, sex. He thought I was WAY too passionate. Too much. Couldn’t handle it. He said I was 100mph all the time.
You don´t do it to get the guy….you do it, because you love him. – I didn’t do it (passion) to get to the guy. And I didn’t do it because I loved him. I did it because that’s who I am. There was no organised plan to achieve anything. It just was. And it is no more. And I think that in the grand scheme of things I proved to be the stronger one. Why? Because I have learned from it, in many many ways. He hasn’t. He is still on Match, taking women to SKYPE and progressing them into his bedroom. And that is the wrong way of going about find The One.
Hi,
Strength is not based on proving anything….sorry, you have got me completely misunderstood.
The nature of feminine energies, is that they are ambiguous. Strength is learnt from handling these unknowns, and learning to navegate through them. You defend the relationship, through your comittment to it, through his and your higher self. Not ego, but GOD.
It is supposed to compliment the guy, because of the exchange of energies. They need to be fluid and go back and forth between the two of you. It is not meant to prove yourself to be stronger or better. It will be an expression of love and maintaining the dynamic soulful and sacred.
Again, I can´t judge a guy when these women are also choosing something with him as well.
Ah, Pluto Puppy, I wondered if you enter this. So…
“…and you wonder why in your first sentence you said– ” I didn’t progress far with the two Scorpio men that I dearly wished to date. “Yeah, “wishing” is your illusion FOR REAL RELATING” – Wishing was about want to date, just that, a normal turn of phrase? Do not make it bigger than it is.
“If you are so disappointed in male Scorpios for not understanding your separation from the divine, you should simply move on to another male you can prove wrong and control, and feel “universal love for”. – What makes you think I am disappointed? Far from it. If anything it makes me even more curious. And would you like to give me your idea of the ‘divine’? You can cut and paste from other explanations earlier, 1954 comments.
“THAT GUY IS EVERYWHERE FOR YOU. He will coddle your sexuality and make you happy. He will coddle your political intent to abuse him and control him via the veil of your sexuality, political intentions and looks.” – You are very concerned with the issue of abuse and some damage that women potentially bring, not the first comment of that kind from you. And you know what? Scorpio No. 2 (Mars in Scorpio, you are too, aren’t you) said to me ‘You now know that you have the power too. Use it.’ He meant the power of sexuality. I refuse to do so. Never did. Never will. Just because you MIGHT have the power of any kind, doesn’t mean you have to exercise it.
“So why invest your utopia with a male Scorpio who knows the harsh realities, cruelties, injustices, self-interest, greed, insecurities and deceptions for control over others IN THIS REAL WORLD AMONG HUMANS??…” – Oh yes, this is the harsh reality of the world. And do you have to ADD to it? There is no discovery of self if one has never endured pain and torture. True. And shall we make it absolutely compulsory to go through the initiation rings in order to obtain this self awareness? Life WILL TAKE you there regardless of any Scorpio. You tell me.
“You are, in this present moment, ego personified through your language and naivety of what divinity and love ISN’T.” – What is divinity, Pluto? What is love?
“Yet another person who says ‘they understand’ themselves deeply and the Scorpionic psyche for social approval and political games… yet is Edging-God-Out ( ego) through the verb of their ‘present’ communication.” – Show me where I said that I understand myself deeply. I doubt you do either. Social approval and political games, why are you so stuck on this? I don’t even know why you are linking these concepts to anything discussed here.
“Because negative, immature, frightened energy EXISTS in this life among humans. It’s as Natural like the sunlight and the seasons. Denying the existence of discomfort and pathological self-lies in yourself is not my problem. And you wonder why we leave you cold for ever.” How sure are you that I am in this kind of denial? You are right in the above, BUT is this the justification for ADDING to the darkness? Sure, it is in me in the same way it is in every other person, INCLUDING yourself. Self lies? Could you be a bit more specific, without using the flowery language?
Pluto, you skilfully avoid anything that relates to, let’s say, imperfections of the Scorpio character. They are absolved by you for eternity for anything and everything that might be their wrong-doing. The ‘blame’ (and I use it figuratively, don’t you start on that one) is with the ones who come to contact with the Plutonic characters. While Plutonic characters don’t understand themselves half the time. They are human. YOU are human. And not divine.
Why are you looking for someone to judge imperfections of people and in particular, scorpios?
If you want to limit yourself to only acknowledging that we are only human, then this is your perrogative. This is what you settle on, when the dust clears up.
Human nature is very imperfect – and this resides in all of us. I have said this before, we have misbehaved, are misbehaving, and will misbehave.
And don´t think less of humanity and the incredible force it is. You don´t need to understand someone´s “human desires” in order for it to be acting in your life.
The fact that we are interacting, is witness to a very strong human desire…the physical world we live in does not require our understanding either. It depends on what you do with these very human energies in your life.
If you don´t want to handle “humans”, the divine will seem insignificant to you.
This is what gives meaning to love. Certain “religious” words, would not exist, if not for our own imperfections…forgiveness, understanding, compassion, severity, kindness, …
That is why one must surrender (outward flow of energy) to the divine.
The energy finds us through our constant GIVING.
Gatubela,
Your comments are most thoughtful.
Why are you looking for someone to judge imperfections of people and in particular, scorpios? – To Judge? Not at all. To understand the complexities is a better word.
I agree with the above, and thinking less of humanity is not part of who I am. That ties in with Pluto’s question “Why are humans not divine?” which I will answer too.
And Gatubela… I don’t ‘handle’ humans the way you put it. I take them as they are. I do NOT attempt to change them to suit my vision of the world. You can change another’s physical world, for better or for worse. You can’t change their personal world. You CAN’T change who they are unless they want to do this for themselves. What I am not prepared to do is to keep another person in my life at ANY cost. It is not about compromises, it is about the exchange of energies you mentioned. And is there a flow that is enriching to both? I let them be. I don’t have the arrogance to impose (Pluto, you will have a comment here I am sure).
“..My interaction with Scorpio No. 2 Mars in Scorpio in fact had an opposite effect and GAVE me ego. Knowing what I am and that my wishes and desires are as valis as anyone else’s. I didn’t have that kind of notion before…”
Sure. I believe you, that he “gave” you “notions” of your ego. They are on exhibit right here before us. But what does your ego message really want to say? Not to mention, the notions of your blind choice to be with, to associate with a Scorpion infidelity artist… yet he was not an Eagle.
As mentioned in an earlier post (no… not a notion) — Birds of a feather……………………………….
No, Pluto, you are wrong. My association with this person was very short lived – one month precisely and precisely for the reasons you mentioned – not an Eagle and still in the dark about who he is and how to use his given power to create and not to destroy. Not a blind choice – a choice given by the restrictive meat market nature of online dating.
My ego says that I am valid. Simple. It also says ‘so are you’. Even simpler.
Late in England, see you later and thank you for the comments. And Pluto… you tend to pick out phrases out of context.
“…Self lies? Could you be a bit more specific, without using the flowery language?”…
Could you be any more soulless, evasive and futile?
What do you want from this little girl? A candy? … Not from me. Never.
Yes, you’re completely “right”. You are not divine. That’s the most honest thing I’ve read from you.
I’m at fault for responding to your nihilism;)
.
Don’t respond then, it is easy not to 🙂
Actually, I really meant this question about self lies. So who is more evasive here? I wouldn’t go as far as saying that you are soulless – you don’t come across as such. Respond or not. Answer the question or not. Ah Pluto….
Still hasn’t answered. Evasive. At least I am consistent in my inconsistencies.
“”How sure are you that I am in this kind of denial? You are right in the above, BUT is this the justification for ADDING to the darkness? Sure, it is in me in the same way it is in every other person, INCLUDING yourself. Self lies? Could you be a bit more specific, without using the flowery language?
So…you want a response to your own consistent inconsistancies? What is it with that?
Are you going to give another imperative or tell me that I am exaggerating or something like that? Hmmmm….You will probably insist on doing what you have been doing…sharing with us who you are.
“BUT is this the justification for ADDING to the darkness?”
Well, I will dare to give you an answer to this question, without the flowery language…
Look in the mirror…and look real damn hard.
Your state of being was too damn weak…and preferred darkness to light. That is why it “added”…
The self lie…is that you had no control over yourself in order to prevent it.
“I wouldn’t go as far as saying that you are soulless.”
Consistant inconsistant atheistism…
And I said ‘YOU are human. And not divine’. But that applies to me as well. Sooo–oo picky… in the wrong places.
Alright… WHY then are humans not divine? Give me the why. Not the politician smirk.
Divinity pertains to the Higher Being. I have a problem, here, Pluto, because if we are talking about God – I am an atheist. So then – divinity as the expression of God like qualities…
Omnifarious – yes, if you are made up of the same matter as the Universe. Energy is constant. It’s physical manifestation is constant. You are breathing the air which was circulated for millions of years and may have been expelled once from a dinosaur’ arse. Or a tiny molecule in your body which formed a letter in Magna Carta in distant past. No – if you think about it in terms of spiritual development – to be all forms and all kinds… and this is what you are talking about? We strive for it. And fail. Always.
Omnipotent – no, because we are limiting ourselves to the constraints of the physical world only. Because technology is taking away the urgency of the need to look within. Because most people stop at the level of satisfying their immediate needs (and I would include the need for love in this too) and do not search further. Ah, but the capability of achieving this over our own lives is there – the ultimate power over own destiny. Limited to OUR OWN. And do you know of anyone who has achieved this?
Omniscient – it’s a big one, all knowing and understanding. While our neural pathways have the capacity and the processing power, the human lifespan limits this to tiny grains of understanding, and we fail to understand ourselves in that short period of time, leave alone see the bigger picture. And Pluto, you will say that I am talking about the physical realities, not the spiritual awareness. But it takes root in the physical world, without your hardware you are NOTHING, but an assembly of body parts. Talking from experience here. We do not know all. We do not understand all. We never will.
So are we divine? Or do we have the audacity to BELIEVE we are? Or can be?
You are welcome to shred this to pieces, Pluto.
“..And Pluto, you will say that I am talking about the physical realities, not the spiritual awareness. But it takes root in the physical world, without your hardware you are NOTHING, but an assembly of body parts. ..”
Our physical bodies are stardust. Nothing more. They consume, self-create, excrete and have sex. The physical body are gratifying machines. Your scientific logical manifestation to this life is exactly what your soul was ordained from birth. Slamming sensitivity as a weakness among the human condition is your main limitation of FELT intelligence to a universal energy far greater than the “destiny” recognized past your nose. Thus your belief that your destiny is significant in your life. Wake up. The sheer ferocity, the immense power of this universe, it’s age and naturally destructive/constructive nature RELATIVE to your own breathing existence, your scientific logic and factual evidence… couldn’t care less if you arrived at your destiny or not. Your baby soul was ordained to be on the path you have been given. Thus atheism is a part of your tiny universe not awake in perspective past your own creation.
Death… is an energy you will never understand, until you have experienced the transcendence of felt pain and it’s soulful virtue. An existence like yours via fears of sensitivity to omni-present forces happening within you and beyond you will not be received or given back to humanity in soul. Because in order to know humanity we must feel the presence of humanity in our own PHYSICAL insignificance first. Your fears of sensitivity in the human condition stifle, cripple your emotional growth and emotional intelligence. Your young human soul was ordained for a cerebral journey of limitation and avoiding know fears. Death (change) of your personality conception has no intentions of reaching you on deeper, devastating real levels either. Unless you want the experience of suffering. Which you don’t.
Pluto, I am beginning to think that you are having a discussion with YOURSELF, as you seem to assume things which are not there. Let’s see…
“Our physical bodies are stardust. Nothing more.”
“Slamming sensitivity as a weakness among the human condition is your main limitation”
“Thus your belief that your destiny is significant in your life.”
“via fears of sensitivity to omni-present forces happening within you and beyond”
“Your fears of sensitivity in the human condition stifle, cripple your emotional growth and emotional intelligence”
“and avoiding know fears”
“Unless you want the experience of suffering. Which you don’t.”
If anywhere in what I have written you find those passages which confirm the assumptions above – we will continue this discussion. Some of it directly contradicts what I have written. But I have to take my hat off to you – you are good at presenting confusion as a valid reality.
You haven’t written those things moron. I said them because your INTENT AGAIN is soulless and manipulative in relating to your own past and now now current expressions. You don’t yourself for squat.
DONE with this clown))))
You haven’t written those things moron. – Exactly my point, Pluto
I said them because your INTENT AGAIN is soulless and manipulative in relating to your own past – How so? If you chose to give your own interpretation to what I didn’t even say? I will not let you get away with putting words in my mouth which were not there, Pluto. End of.
She only wants to be right!.. FUCK…… THAT!! – No, I want to understand something CONSTRUCTIVELY, not through your own subjective assumptions. You cannot do that. Not able. And that is fine with me, Pluto. There are only three people in this discussion as of now, and if two do not want it – it closes. And this is fine too.
Thank you.
FUCKING GAMES.
You teach me (us) nothing;)
Please let me clarify something here….
I didn’t have ‘relationships’ with these two men, in a conventional sense. All it was is the initial stage of a dating. I went into this with a heart free from any attachment to another man, well, because I have been single for many years, thus, having given myself plenty of time to set myself free. THEY had their hearts locked on to someone from the past. No.1 went back to her – and paid the price (another adultery). No.2 got a text from the ex asking for forgiveness. He said to me ‘It nearly killed me. She will eat my silence. I will talk, but not now’. Punishment. I am sure that if she asks to go back to him – he will accept, after the punishment has been served. But…
There is one more whom I got to know over a period of weeks and months, and who started my search for a Scorpio man. THIS is a different picture all together. Because there was time and no romantic agenda (we worked together on a project, I am running a regeneration campaign), we developed a deep understanding of each other, respect and trust. And yes, there is an underlying attraction, but he is off limits, and that’s how it will stay. I was told by a few people that he has the deepest respect for me, and I do too – and the connection is effortless, with no lengthy explanations needed.
There was also a Scorpio guy at work who (again, over time!!) developed attraction towards me, although it was not reciprocated on my part.
What I am trying to say is this: I have this effect on Scorpio guys whereby they get to know me and become interested. But this happens OVER TIME. I may be ‘soulless’ according to Pluto Puppy, but those guys didn’t see it this way. In fact, the more they got to know me the more I became of interest. So… draw your own conclusions. Clearly, it does not lend itself well to online dating where people make snap decisions based on one date. My two dating Scorpios, aside from their personal issues, failed on their gut instinct. Or maybe were too wrapped up in the immediate past, but that is not my issue. My 100mph clearly did not help as it does not give a chance to know me for who I am. Stepping back and letting another to come to you seems much better. And what about my gut instinct? In No.1 case – he definitely could be the one. But he has his own path to follow, and if that includes putting himself through the agony of partner’s infidelity – so be it. In No.2 case – my own gut instinct told me he was not the one. But the passion was there, which had to be released for both, and he also said that I took his thoughts away from another, made him calm.
I will carry on my search for my Scorpio man. If anything, it made me think that the potential for greatness is such that it would be cowardice to give up.
Thank you.
“…I may be ‘soulless’ according to Pluto Puppy, but those guys didn’t see it this way. In fact, the more they got to know me the more I became of interest..”
Obviously they didn’t see you, the psyche of your reality as I do. They didn’t have the power (ability). Almost every male… is blindly attracted to the physical attraction to women first. He doesn’t understand empowerment and controlling deceptions or truth or deception manifesting from another. He wont see the real manifestation of you, as I have been seeing in the truth of your psyche here… because they unconsciously think of following conformity, which is the lower-self animal desires in human nature, which thinks below the waist. I could choose to do that, to be that, given any moment with every luscious creature I encounter. But I don’t. Why would I give away my inner resources for a quick fuck. That is what the average man does. You need that guy to feel powerful. Without that approval your ego suffers and breaks. No agenda remember. He’s just “right” for you.
“… we developed a deep understanding of each other, respect and trust. And yes, there is an underlying attraction, but he is off limits, and that’s how it will stay. I was told by a few people that he has the deepest respect for me, and I do too – and the connection is effortless, with no lengthy explanations needed..”
O really? He had “the deepest respect for you” huh?… well, a Relative “notion” to those who manipulate the integrity of each interaction, who leech off of others energy because they lack empowerment within themselves, and those who need, yes need… the applause and glorification for control of a social dynamic. Your expression fills my world with nothing but plain disdain.;)
So 1232 is your expressed noun. Where’s the verb demonstrated in your nouns?
You failed to read my post, Pluto. The physical attraction developed AFTER getting to know each other for some time. As people. Not as a male and a female. It worked from the soul to the body, and not the other way around. If you think that EVERY man will look at EVERY woman from the animalistic perspective – Pluto, you are limiting your vision, and it is a simplistic way of looking at things.
Respect was manifested through actions, not words. On both sides. How do I know that respect is there on his part? A Scorpio man – protection. This man’s protection hangs around me like a cloak. You guys cannot help but extend this to those you respect and care about – part of who you are. It does not matter if another needs this or not. You will do it anyway.
“those who need, yes need… the applause and glorification for control of a social dynamic” – there you go again, social dynamic… I would NEVER believe, for one second that you are free from the need to be appreciated. Not the applause. Not the glorification. Just plain simple appreciation of who you are. By another. Or… you have reached the level of divinity. But I don’t think so.
And Pluto… “Your expression fills my world with nothing but plain disdain.;)” It fills you with something. This is good. Much worse when it leaves one with… nothingness.
“I will carry on my search for my Scorpio man. If anything, it made me think that the potential for greatness is such that it would be cowardice to give up.”
I guess you are a combat fish on an ops mission? An ahteist woman searching for “potential” and “greatness”, eh?
“Ah, but the capability of achieving this over our own lives is there – the ultimate power over own destiny. Limited to OUR OWN. And do you know of anyone who has achieved this?”
Have you analyzed this your use of the word “capability”? How does this fit in with your Atheist views?
“And Pluto… “Your expression fills my world with nothing but plain disdain.;)” It fills you with something. This is good. Much worse when it leaves one with… nothingness.”
Why would someone else´s expression leave someone with nothingness? I hope that if you feel this way, you won´t continue “leaving yourself with more of the same.”
You seem to be on a kind of quest for SOMETHING…
So, what is that exactly? And why do you think Scorpio men can provide this for you?
Gatubela,
Combat fish LOL, you are very kind to me.
“I guess you are a combat fish on an ops mission? An ahteist woman searching for “potential” and “greatness”, eh?” – Potential FOR greatness, not AND greatness. Potential for greatness together. Before anyone jumps to conclusions – it is not a quest for greatness via what Pluto puts as “leech off of others energy because they lack empowerment within themselves”.
I am a woman searching, not an atheist woman searching, I think it is irrelevant. HOWEVER… I live in a very secular society. And yet I find that my most fruitful interactions are with people of faith. I get it. I just don’t have faith in God. You may look at this as tragedy. I don’t. My lack of faith does not stop me from exploring its spiritual aspects. And not in a surgical, clinical way of dissecting and analysing, but as part of what humans are. You mentioned this before too.
“Have you analyzed this your use of the word “capability”? How does this fit in with your Atheist views?” – Before we go further – English is my second language. AND I intuit my way through interaction with others, that is how I learn. It is in the atmosphere, the gestures, the voice, the eyes and the facial expressions. Given this, a verbal form is not a skill that comes easily to me. But it takes all sorts to make the world go round, doesn’t it?
capabilities. qualities, abilities, features, etc., that can be used or developed; potential.
The potential, the latent potential to cross over. What does it have to do with my atheist views? You seem to see it very black and white, and it is not to me.
“Why would someone else´s expression leave someone with nothingness? I hope that if you feel this way, you won´t continue “leaving yourself with more of the same.”” – Nothingness as in no comment, no feeling, no further thought, no desire to respond. As in “I’ve just had a piss” – no response, trivia.
“You seem to be on a kind of quest for SOMETHING… So, what is that exactly? And why do you think Scorpio men can provide this for you?” – Ah, Gatubela, the devotion of love and giving of yourself freely to another… no one can provide this. But it can be created together. I am under no illusion that it would not be plain sailing, nor do I expect it to be. You said earlier “You defend the relationship, through your commitment to it, through his and your higher self. Not ego, but GOD”. Let’s replace GOD with LOVE, for my atheist sake.
Why Scorpio? We seem to bring the best in each other, that flow of energy mentioned earlier. But can we get passed the initial shock of each other’s sensitivities, which feel at times like looking into the mirror? Similarities of our natures are compelling, but with enough differences to explore. Granted, not with every Scorpio man, so many factors involved, and I would be a fool to think that. But no one can say that Scorpio men are as shallow as a tea plate. This is what I want to avoid at all cost – superficiality of expression. Other than that – I don’t have all the answers. If I did – I would be in a different place all together.
“Pluto, you skilfully avoid anything that relates to, let’s say, imperfections of the Scorpio character. They are absolved by you for eternity for anything and everything that might be their wrong-doing.”
Well, actually, if you read the forum…you will see that he does talk about the differences between eagles and unevolved scorpios…
“It worked from the soul to the body, and not the other way around.”
The “S” (s*o*u*l*) word again!!!
“Or… you have reached the level of divinity. But I don’t think so.”
I guess you will leave it at the level of only a thought in your mind pisces?
“This man’s protection hangs around me like a cloak. You guys cannot help but extend this to those you respect and care about – part of who you are.”
Yes…but do you do the same? Do you understand what it took for someone to make you feel like that?
If you truly honoured this energy, your curiousity at his “divinity” would have motivated you to learn how to do it as well.
So, what did you cloak him with? Darn it girl, the answer better not be “nothingness”. You need “something” in order to deal with the “ADDED DARKNESS” right? Can you justify your OWN failure in getting with the program and NOT doing this, the SECOND TIME AROUND?
Why don´t you look at the option of considering the possibility that a state of being EXISTS (Atheism don´t seem to be it) that could permit you to find your own answers and interior peace?
Oh oh…she gonna tell me more about herself now…and her beliefs…or how wrong I am…
…or will she actually tell me what she is going to DO about it? (i.e. handling the added darkness thingy?)
“Your state of being was too damn weak…and preferred darkness to light. That is why it “added”…” – I get it, Gatubela. Following from this the only way to enlightenment is through suffering. But here is the thing… The suffering is largely self-inflicted. As long as I understand that – no other person’s action can and will bring suffering to me. That much I understood. Following from that – if I don’t ever suffer because of this protection within – I will remain in the state of light, but NOT progress further. So, is there some value in being weak at times? And are you able to relinquish some control over yourself to achieve that, Gatubela?
“So, what did you cloak him with?” – I honestly don’t know. All I know is that my presence makes him brighter, lighter and… himself. And our communication makes him laugh. What did it take for me? It took not being afraid of openness and it took honesty. And remember, this is NOT a romantic involvement.
“If you truly honoured this energy, your curiousity at his “divinity” would have motivated you to learn how to do it as well.” – I cannot learn this from him. I am not close enough to this person. BUT he seems to feel… safe around me, so maybe I am doing something right. You see it works both ways. But differently.
“…or will she actually tell me what she is going to DO about it? (i.e. handling the added darkness thingy?)” – see above. I don’t WANT a complete inner peace, this is akin to death. I want a balance of dark and light in my life, in the same way it is out there.
“Why don´t you look at the option of considering the possibility that a state of being EXISTS (Atheism don´t seem to be it) that could permit you to find your own answers and interior peace?” – Gatubela, I will simply not discuss this here, it is a journey of a different kind. And I will not ask you about yours. But you are free to share, of course.
“Can you justify your OWN failure in getting with the program and NOT doing this, the SECOND TIME AROUND?” – Sorry, I honestly didn’t get this one. The programme?
Hmmmm…..
“Potential FOR greatness, not AND greatness.. Before anyone jumps to conclusions – it is not a quest for greatness via what Pluto puts as “leech off of others energy because they lack empowerment within themselves”.
“Ah, Gatubela, the devotion of love and giving of yourself freely to another… no one can provide this. But it can be created together.”
Oh…hmmmm….let me read a bit between the lines here…
You don´t believe in GOD, but you “believe” in LOVE. Coupled with “Potential for greatness together”…I am “intuiting” that you feel that you could be LOVE (not GOD), together? Like, autonomous and manifesting those “God – like” qualities you were talking about?
Am I understanding you better?
And it took loyalty to who he is. He acknowledged that.
Gatubela,
Leave this entire waste of energy be. Why share anything with a loveless dimwit? She only wants to be right!.. FUCK…… THAT!!
This level is every part of her. It’s who she IS. Let her have that game. I don’t want it. And I know you don’t either.
Walk away.
.
Her copying and pasting everything of what we value, what we share with integrity IS FUCKING LEECHED into her twisted head game. Nothing is originally shared. And she questions my judgments?
———————————–
I didn’t want this. But I helped it along by feeding her sickening intent.;)
Nothing is originally shared. – Is this what it is about, Pluto? I didn’t give you access to the inner sanctum? You want to know about my sleepless nights? About questioning of my core being and what I project to others? About miles and miles of threading the ground at night? About writing pages and pages of self flagellation?
You don’t really, and I wouldn’t, Pluto. Your hostility stops me from sharing, because within it is the seed of judgement, not love. And copying and pasting – this is to achieve the clarity, not to steal your originality. Honestly. But you don’t see it this way.
“… And copying and pasting – this is to achieve the clarity, not to steal your originality. Honestly. But you don’t see it this way…”
To achieve clarity?!! Damn right I’m hostile. I know specifically what I see. And it’s not attractive. Your intentions NEVER wanted clarity because clarity needs A HEART first who knows the essence of engaging and IDENTIFYING the reality in another’s shoes. Your soulless lies to yourself and continued bullshit make me seeethe.))))
Both you and Gatubela copy and paste. I took it from you. Your very first reply was hostile and thereafter. Hence, the withdrawal.
Now, when you stop your hissy fit some time later…. Maybe you can tell me about the essence of engaging the way you understand it. In plain English, without feeling superior as you do. The way Gatubela does. Seriously, I would appreciate that. If not – I accept that too, Pluto
Geez, lighten up.
“..Your hostility stops me from sharing, because within it is the seed of judgement, not love…
Seeds of judgment by human beings are exactly what you need to wake up. You don’t know love. You know manipulation and control of others. Spare me your “opinions” of pseudo self-knowledge and the pseudo perception of who you “think” I am.
It takes the unity of two open hearts to engage. To understand one another through truth experienced in the present moment of an exchange. Truth in the present breath is not the manifestation of one person presenting limiting logic and the other blasting that limiting logic out of the water. I won’t force you to understand the present feeling or psychology in your disconnected communication. That recognition is on you.
All I can do is be true to my inner guidance, so if that means intense contempt for your lack to identifying and relating in realness, so be it. I trust every intuitive feeling, whether boiling volcanic, or passionate, or placidly calm… pulsing through my instinctual core and molecular being. I trust it. I am it.
Pluto,
Thank you. THAT was beautiful. And that is YOU. Open. You see I felt throughout this exchange that neither were open. You are right in saying that logic is limiting, but it is used I think as a tool to ward off the exchange of emotion brought on by experiencing the moment as is. Don’t you think? Anything you feel at any given moment in time is valid. Even intense contempt. I’d rather you expressed that than suppressed that, because it is the true you.
Why is it then that generally people are scared of the feeling which comes with any exchange between one another?
Hi P.Puppy,
You are right…there is no love.
I will listen to you on this one.
“.. You are right in saying that logic is limiting, but it is used I think as a tool to ward off the exchange of emotion brought on by experiencing the moment as is. Don’t you think?..”
Yes the warding off you describe is actually ‘the energy of fear’ in people. It’s called– denial of something REAL. Those real visceral denials, deflected and non-examined thanks to the vice of the self-created, self-protected limitations manifesting outward through ego myth… is the cause… of the illusions and separation from depth perception and depth of feeling rapturously human. If you can’t witness/observe people in and around your bustling life believing in the lies created in their heads, manifested in their behavior… I really can’t validate that reality for you into logic. You would require psychic sensitivities and broad social (human) awareness to understand your-feeling-self, relative to everyone else. Intense concentration is just one inner resource utilized via a probing mind. Plutonic people would feel me intuitively on this, when I say probing beneath the acceptance of the physical and the rational excuses of human logic.
There is infinitely more to discover within us. The trouble is… non Plutonic natures ( a good chunk of the worlds population) fear digging down into that deep messy abyss. For the deeper we dig within ourselves and in within others (humanity) the more we understand about our physical mortality and spiritual eternity rooted in love for what is. So love is then accepted by including the Shadow of man/woman and their factual potential for conscious abuse, conscious cruelty, conscious greed, conscious prejudice, conscious hypocrisy and conscious control over others in their relative environments. Those words are not just words. Those perspectives– abuse, cruelty, greed, judgment, hypocrisy and control are real manifestations riddled throughout our people dynamics in this superficial world. The Innocence however by ‘thinking and debate’ within non Plutonic natures, are oblivious to these tormenting truths existing among the darker ego nature in people. The more deeper Plutonic natures investigate, the more light we exhume in dark experiences and the more we feel and discover IN THAT examined human Shadow. We learn the harsher Truths by connecting the experiences of our raw lessons and the raw experiences which give meaning to our lives, in terms of our fearless courage to heal people, to transform them by loving them through conflict, by caring and connecting and engaging to people with holistic truths felt as a part of us and intimate personal discoveries learned between us. = Real engagement. Not lip service. Not banal chatter.
The masses, the human personality will always connect “conflict” in their hearts between loved ones and friends and associates as “negative fear”. And guess what?… Their feeling would be right. Negative fear… or Conflict– IS THE ENERGY they experience. So what do people do about that fear they feel?… You said it prior. “They ward off” conflicting energies, which are in truth, conflicting realities between each person. You have to realize in the real world of influence, that humans are sheep. People conform to what’s comfortable for them. They follow each other in packs or in flocks or in massive herds. Again, without seismic Plutonic or Uranus energies in our nature to see this perspective objectively… you will “not see” this conformity among tribes and families of people, including your own participation in a conformed herd of people. So Feeling, seeing and acknowledging mass conformity or segregation among humans, including your role among certain tribes is a very important piece of the holistic, spiritual human puzzle. That’s because subconsciously the human puzzle FEEL SAFER in known groups or cultures. The reason being humans in flocks and herds THINK THE SAME WAY. = Conformity = Safety in mind and heart. So conformity… from a very deep individual level, subconsciously breeds FEAR among there members. Because each person in any cultural flock fears anything different which may rock the foundations of their reality structure. You see?… Anyway… as a lone Eagle… I see this fear in my intense observations with people everyday, every moment. I see and feel their fears of what they don’t want to understand in other tribes and flocks, and most critically the denial of expansion in themselves. I see it… away from this computer.
Everything I write here, are all the perceptions and experiences I have been a part of somewhere along the road and at some stage in my past. Every word in my writing I soulfully mean. I don’t waste words in the real human world. A lot of my expression all throughout this forum, is actually forward minded, propelling. I say what I mean in life everyday. I don’t ramble on away from this computer. Funny fact, but it’s true. I’m a mutable participant in life away from this computer. My real reality (seen and felt right here on the forum) would scare and scar people. True, daring individuals are radical to a certain degree. I see this radical as healthy change. Because without someone fearlessly speaking about what’s going on inside of them… in a way that masses could accept and relate with, more healing and progressive answers can be found. I admire progressive souls. Because I see the high value of that bravery in myself. I completely understand the different stages each person is walking, that is one aspect of my radical expression I know is distinctive to each their own. I do not however feel truly alive inside when I do not feel vital and sexual among the mass sections of conformity described earlier. Seeking the unknown is the juice of my life and the fate of that juice is real living for me. The life within me is intense and meaningful. All of you are bearing witness to that intensity for life when I write. I couldn’t ask for anything more. I am grateful.
“So love is then accepted by including the Shadow of man/woman and their factual potential for conscious abuse, conscious cruelty, conscious greed, conscious prejudice, conscious hypocrisy and conscious control over others in their relative environments.”
Yes…
When the shadow changes, there is transformation of energies.
Moving those mountains….is not just feeling those celestial energies…it is knowing how to apply them to the shadows for healing and transformation.
If one chooses to meditate on this, it gives you a different perspective of what is really required in order to move that barrier to creation and making this world a better place to live in.
Pluto,
I have understood and FELT every word you wrote, and THIS is something I was waiting for. You have now allowed me to talk. Thank you. There are many themes in there, and I would like to address them one by one. Please bear with me, Pluto, I have a Virgo rising and am methodical and a stickler for detail, which does not sit well with my intuitive and feeling orientated nature – but bear with me.
“Negative fear of conflict”… This is the subject VERY relevant to a Piscean. I have lived my life through this fear. I ducked from conflicts for fear of experiencing deep feeling of discontent which they brought on every time. I walked away from the situations which required an exchange of those negative energies. And where I didn’t walk away – I submitted myself to another’s ‘truth’. Where I’ve made a mistake in my thinking is that facing another’s reality through conflict equates to subsuming my own, which is not the case. And also that bringing up the exhumed fears means imposing who I am on others, and ,boy, don’t we Pisceans HATE to impose. You may say that our exchange up to now contradicts this statement, BUT I could express my feelings and thoughts, right or wrong, but I would never expect anyone to subscribe to them. This is what I mean about imposing.
So what of it, Pluto? Every time when my world came into contact with another’s – I consciously attempted to pick out the positive flow of the interaction and ignore/suppress the negatives. This is because (I think) striving for harmony is at the core of my existence, not because I don’t know the light/the dark ratio – there is nothing out there in people that I haven’t witnessed within myself. And yes, the cosy comfort of thinking that you do not hurt another, which, in turn, makes you believe that hey, ‘I am a good person’. Ha!
I face those fears in people now, and by doing so I face those of my own. I am not there all of the time yet, but the process is slowly taking place, clumsy and messy at times… And with that in mind… On here we theorise and exchange, but out there in the real world… What do you do with the conflicting energies? Evidently, we cannot launch into a lecture to others on what exactly is going on during such an exchange, even if WE understand, and THEY do not. How do you deal with it? Ultimately, what is the outcome you would expect in every situation?
And Pluto… there will be another question relating to that. I am grateful for you… being here.
Hi Inessology,
Hi, Gatubela
Thank you for the video. Yes, it is a cartoon, and their abyss looks somewhat safe and almost inviting, while ours is a much darker place. But stepping out of the comfort zone (or being pushed out of it at times) is to step on to a higher level of understanding.
Something that you said earlier in response to Pluto’s comment “Moving those mountains….is not just feeling those celestial energies…it is knowing how to apply them to the shadows for healing and transformation.”
I feel those energies EVERY TIME, but have no tools to apply them. I do not know how. Mybe this is because while the Plutonian mission is to enable transformation, thus, propelling to greater self awareness and the awareness of others, my Piscean mission is to bring people together and to enable healing to take place during and after the transformation took place. I am the Light. But the dark side of me screams loud at times. If I were to be true to who I am, maybe I shouldn’t steal the tools of Plutonian trade, but I would like to know what they are. That is exactly my question to Pluto and you I guess…
Hi Ines.,
” That is exactly my question to Pluto and you I guess…”
I live from my heart…and the universe answers.
I have been blessed.
“…And yes, the cosy comfort of thinking that you do not hurt another, which, in turn, makes you believe that hey, ‘I am a good person’. Ha!…”
Since you’re a Virgo rising, your psyche (nature) screams with Virgin practicality and the mental manifestation of “perfection” in all people, situations and messy things around the house. Darn. LoL. So believing in your need for perfect harmony, all the time, every time, among people you care about (which is a healthy outlook) is an oxymoron if you’re ‘unable’ to objectively see yourself, your manipulations to argue instead of relate ‘which cause’ resentment or hostility in other people’s response.
Harmony at any cost, is an illusion accepted by the mass conformity.
Harmony at any cost is what most “loving”and “harmonious” people think great relating is all about. The blindness of that reality or demeanor (psychological nature) is… human beings are not structured to be placid and gentle all… the…. time. Herd state humans are far from perfect with communicating their feelings when their backs are up against the wall in “a disagreement” or issue that is not acknowledged. So conformed brains are usually unsure of their Truthful stance if feeling guilty, or saddened, or pouty, or cranky, or depressed in that turbulent moment etc… So obviously most people can’t stay harmonious or on an even keel like you might always do emotionally.
Expecting Virgo perfection by “thinking” that people will ‘mirror your manner’ is naive, passive, limited convoluted logic… in terms of speaking directly from the heart (not the head) in Truth of THE ACTUAL PROBLEM. You see, conformed brains are not problem solvers or seekers of the truth need in a disagreement. Speaking powerfully in the present breath regardless of the swirling negative energy present by each person, heals and transforms any disagreements or redundant arguments. Because Truth is an Energy to resolve and care. Truth is not logical.
I have known hundreds of people in my life who would passively think peaceful communication makes them better, socially higher or “more grounded” than those who show passion or strong emotions. Sure, communicating from an even keel with no highs and no lows in ones expression is welcoming to others… but guess what??… That demeanor DOES NOT MEAN ones INTENTIONS ARE HONEST, BRAVE AND FORTHCOMING. Lies, deflection and passive avoidance of the real issue at hand are commonly used by herd state mentalities in response to “harmonious people”. Because those people FEAR AMBIVALENT ENERGY.
So we come back full circle to my comments shared on 1238.
Next question:
“…What do you do with the conflicting energies?…”
Hahahaha… Conflict is half of who I am, at the core. I experience conflict all the time within my powerful nature. I affect people. Mars in Scorpio, in the 8th house plus Sun and three other planets in Scorpio is like a ticking time-bomb just waiting to go off. So of course with this felt powerful energy circulating through me every breath, I must be very conscious and self-disciplined of what I’m saying and how I use this personal power.
When certain people evade my heart and intent to be good them, such as them attempting manipulative games toward me… or their stealthy intentions to suck my energy and stillness… I turn my head, glare them straight in the eyes and speak with few words of intensity which shakes them to the bone. They (enemies with a dark agenda) ‘can feel’ my imposing response even with something said to them. I soon smash their verbiage of false bravado or cokyness with the glare of (don’t fuck with me). I don’t mind fun and games and joking around… not at all. However I do mind a person who takes my kindness and retained energy for granted. The sting I give is not of measly Scorpion. The damage I can do to a persons sense of projected smartness/toughness of self, is much more dangerous. When I’m provoked face to face, my talons (energy-response) literally put the fear of God in that person.
That’s I handle conflict energies. Conflict, war, warrior terrain in my head, heart and soul… and my strong sexuality… provoke the worst fears in other people, which they have never felt before.
I never wish to abuse anyone with this consciousness and containment. But if needed… I respond to dark personalities to show them what “Dark” really means.
I Am… the Dark. But through my experienced evolution, I am now also the Light. What I feel surging through me, my will, sexuality and gentleness with the innocent are all virtues which most people know me for. I don’t fear death. Think about that.
“The damage I can do to a persons sense of projected smartness/toughness of self, is much more dangerous.”
Yes, the ‘damage’ to their projected ego… they WOULD perceive it as such, wouldn’t they… even without being consciously aware… the feeling of being ‘hurt’ hahaha… so transparent now…
Evolved souls will NOT feel it as a damage, they will feel it as a genuine exchange of truth… besides, there will be no such sting from an evolved Scorpio if the energies exchanged are genuine…
Little gems… retracing…
It took 40 minutes for my comment to post – the longest so far, damn slow. Pluto, let me go through your comment, and I will respond.
Thanks
Thank you, Pluto
My Virgo rising does NOT prevent me from living in an emotional and physical mess occasionally, far from the perfection associated with this sign, you should see my place at times… Funnily enough, I do not expect perfection from others, but from myself. This, in itself, can be frustrating, because high expectations bring with themselves a fear of… not living up to them.
“your manipulations to argue instead of relate” – guilty as charged
“Truth of the actual problem” I understand that truth is not logical. In terms of integrity of intention and character it may be absolute, and this is where “Speaking powerfully in the present breath regardless of the swirling negative energy present by each person, heals and transforms any disagreements or redundant arguments.” I get it, and this is a healthy stance to take. But… is truth absolute in terms of conflict resolution in everyday interactions? Imagine that you have a dispute with neighbours about fence boundaries, or a particular problem at a business meeting which has many solution offerings, and opposing camps supporting either one. And this brings me to the question I asked earlier “Ultimately, what is the outcome you would expect in every situation?” Not its physical manifestations, which can take many forms. But conflicting energies which do not achieve a resolution because everyone is holding on to their own version of truth? What then?
You expressed how you personally deal with conflicting energies, thank you for that. This is what I witness in other Scorpio men, although I have never been on a receiving end of it. The intensity and the vector of it vary from one to another, but it is always there ready to be unleashed. I respect that. I respect the honesty of it, no matter how scarring it may be to the other party. And do you want the honest truth? I would want to be the other party one day, IF it comes to it. Because if I have the ability to withstand this without feeling self-righteous and resentful – it raises the bar for both, don’t you think?
“Harmony at any cost is an illusion”. Does this mean that trying to achieve harmony is an act of deception of self and others? OR… can I think of it as part of this perpetual cycle where harmony is a temporary state replaced by conflict replaced by harmony again?
““more grounded” than those who show passion or strong emotions. Sure, communicating from an even keel with no highs and no lows in ones expression is welcoming to others…” – Passion or strong emotion are FRIGHTENING to others. I say that because my mode of communication includes both AND (especially in the context of the culture I live in) is not socially acceptable. Expression of passion is considered aggressive, even if there are no aggressive undertones. Strong emotion and its physical manifestations are considered embarrassing. However, Pluto… I don’t know of any Scorpio men who visibly show that in their everyday interactions – quite the opposite – total control. It is only in that state of defense you spoke about that it becomes palpable. Or interactions of sexual nature.
“Conflict, war, warrior terrain in my head, heart and soul… and my strong sexuality… provoke the worst fears in other people, which they have never felt before.” – that may be so and may be unique to you. I always feel utterly comfortable around Scorpios, whether male or female. Their energies are enriching and their conduct honest, especially in the older ones.
“I don’t fear death” – I would like to discuss that separately if your patience doesn’t run out.
“But… is truth absolute in terms of conflict resolution in everyday interactions?..”
Looking at yourself honestly during events since past… have you argued with someone like your neighbor, your mother of father, have you nagged at your boyfriend or girlfriend for “not getting it”?
Please feel WHAT EXACTLY HAVE YOU BEEN ARGUING ABOUT in your life with people??
Think back about negative, super frustrating, hurtful exchanges with people. Feeeeeeeel for what was all the fuss over during that exchange? Feel what THE REAL CONCERN was at the time, feel what the real concern turned out to be— which WAS NOT SAID bravely from your heart and belly. And theirs.
You catching this?…… So, looking back what are most arguments and negative feelings and disagreements really about??
They are about—- Unexpressed Fears. They are about superficial bullshit. They are about hiding the truth because ego doesn’t want to feeeeeel the realism of self-Truth. Bickering and nagging and manipulating the other persons response—- is about futile back and forth communication (aka bullshit).
Constant, over and over and over and over arguments and disagreements are really about: AN ENERGY VOID IN THE LOCATION OF TRUTH.
I said before… People don’t or can’t surrender their personality noise when negative energy (death) is present. People honestly don’t know how to solve their own maniacal, petty, dumbass problems. People stagnate on the lower self. They cannot access The Higher Mind and identify with what the hell they’re frustrated about. People are not aware of their annoyances, not aware of their cynicism toward every day life and challenges. Not Aware.
“… that may be so and may be unique to you. I always feel utterly comfortable around Scorpios, whether male or female. Their energies are enriching and their conduct honest, especially in the older ones….”
That’s specifically because you do as Virgo/Pisces nature, have a natural sense of integrity and service to humanity. Those energies are caring and respected by people, such as Scorpio’s, whom appreciate your devotion and integrity to service.
Sweetheart, “Provoking” is not your True/Deeper nature. That is my true nature. Much of your feminine essence and sexual goodness is innocent out in the big bad world… even though I could strangle you for keeping the perfection argue machine rolling for the rightness of sheer nothingness. LoL.
Yes shaking things up, rocking the boat is unique to me. I would not expect you or any other Persephone to acquire my being. That is not my message. My message is to share with you the distinctions of who were are beneath the arduous noise of any superficial noise.
When we slow everything down fizzing inside us… to a literal Stillness, a literal Emptiness of thought clutter… our thoughts, feelings and expectant motivations from us and the other fall away.
I am an atheist. I progressed to this from being an agnostic, which is basically sitting on a fence and waiting for someone to push you either side of it. To me, any form of organised religion, apart from its spiritual content, is a social institution, by now well and truly merged with the Establishment. Sure, it was different two thousand years ago, when agnostics were writing the Dead Sea scrolls – they were outsiders then. It has moved on and slowly transformed into a farce, with layers and layers of culturally and historically imposed limitations.
HOWEVER… My spirituality is of a different kind and does not need a crutch in the form of accepted rituals or any other superficial expression, such as a bearded man on a cloud. Hence, I cannot join any group, even though I mentioned earlier that I feel more connection with those of faith, than with those of none. Instead, I long to merge with forces of the Universe, a tiny speck in realization of my own insignificance in the face of it all. This return to where I came from will take place through death. I will decay and lend part of me to some plant or animal and will carry on living forever, just in a different form. And here is the thing… here on Earth I long to merge with another being, to transcend my individuality through the Oneness. Maybe this is a subconscious desire to replicate/rehearse my future unity with the Universe. Go figure…
I prefer my Piscean nature, as this is the one that gives me peace and an ability to heal. My Virgin side interferes with constant inner analysis, nagging and critical bashing of who I am. Sometimes I don’t want to listen to her
I have Neptune in Scorpio – what does that mean? And my Mars is completely screwed – in Pisces.
“Provoking” is not your True/Deeper nature – Pluto, as I said earlier “If I were to be true to who I am, maybe I shouldn’t steal the tools of Plutonian trade.”
“…To me, any form of organised religion, apart from its spiritual content, is a social institution, by now well and truly merged with the Establishment. Sure, it was different two thousand years ago, when agnostics were writing the Dead Sea scrolls – they were outsiders then. It has moved on and slowly transformed into a farce, with layers and layers of culturally and historically imposed limitations…”
I’m with you there. Many of my past convictions have slammed the mind control of long established, rigid, hugely profitable, sectarian religions, cults and organizations (namely a cold twisted regime called scientology). I have said before, I am my own religion all the way down to the molecular breath and the proof of this is shown throughout my manner and expression.
“… My Virgin side interferes with constant inner analysis, nagging and critical bashing of who I am. Sometimes I don’t want to listen to her…”
That bashing is but one little step for your soul’s direction and evolution. It’s necessary darling, for your soul. Be gentle with yourself, you’re a bunny on many innocent levels. I have encouraged the warrior psychology, the spiritual awareness of constant self-love and forgiveness here on the forum.
Your mystical fusion (Pisces) and practical analyzing (Virgo) can now see it’s Oneness in your existence in the now, as we speak now like caring human beings. There is no right and no wrong relative to your inner knowing. You just are. Accept, relax and dissolve into the splendor of this Universe. You now see the negative implications of cold, heartless ego based analysis. You now understand the toxic acidity, the mental-rain spitting negative wounds and abusive fears and “the judgement’s” underneath those intensely critical misgivings…. Ahh, the beauties of greater consciousness through retrospective love.
Love is flowing within you, always trust your feminine strength, wisdom and nurturing goodness. Trust the divinity of your sincere devotion to care for others which means loving in the eyes of those who know how to recognize it. Always forgive yourself of “making mistakes” because criticizing ourselves is like placing our heads on the executioners chopping block then awaiting the chop. Save yourself the inflicting chop. Self-loathing is vicariously real among minds and hearts of many around us. We don’t have to allow vicarious neurosis and dysfunctional influence keep us imprisoned in redundant fears and confusion. We always have the choice to not be at the mercy of our fragile ego myths and the belief systems which those created myths subscribe and promote… whether they’re loving and present intentions, or whether they’re toxic, disturbed and lost in the pretense of ego-gratification.
You don’t have to steal any tools from my cave. But you’re welcome to borrow them (virtuously).
Smiley face;)
Pluto,
Your expression fills me with joy. Your wisdom fills me with awe. You are human, you are not divine. Your wisdom IS. I am slowly going through the previous posts on this forum, and there aren’t many questions you haven’t addressed already. Your answers resonate deep within me, for they are what I have FELT through in my life, but could never verbalise or put together in any organised way. As I said before, my way through life is largely instinctive, some of those I simply shiver and transit through, on paper it fades into meaningless sound bites. You have given them form. And it was for that reason that I chose to enter here.
Our exchange confirms to me that I am moving away from cowering in the presence of adversity. In the past my heightened sensitivities would not allow me to continue after your first comment. I would have left a dignified message and would have walked away – licking my wounds and feeling utterly miserable. Internalising that misery and making ‘conclusions’ about the world and the people in it ‘as is’. I haven’t done that now. I knew in my heart that the beauty of wisdom to continue without prejudice will eventually reach the threshold, cross over and be met with an open heart. You were and are a willing participant in that – I am eternally grateful.
Throat grabbing emotions placed outside of meaningful context in which they occur – take life of their own, haunt and prevent me from feeling them inside, while projecting them without fear into the world. With love.
The day I posted my first comment was the day of his birthday. Three weeks before I walked out of his house at four in the morning when he was asleep. He woke up, but didn’t ask for explanations. He made remarks later a few times – it bothered him. I gave him my reasons. It saddened me that he chose to utilise his power for immediate gratification. Please remember that I didn’t love him, there wasn’t enough time to BEGIN to love him. I was taken by him. And… I sent him a present. Two, actually. And a card which I made myself, with some free flowing words and a poem. Five verses. No, not of a romantic flowery variety – not my style, despite deeply rooted romanticism in me… But I cut to the chase. I wanted to let him know the path he has taken.
And the lines of communication broke down.
Pluto, I cannot post it here, it would disclose the identity of the person to the entire world. But I want to know if my self expression was enough to hurt his sensitivities. It was not meant to. Maybe it didn’t. It was meant to be honest. I HAD to let him know. Live by the sword – die by the sword. May I send it to you?
Thank you.
Hi Ines,
So…you live by the sword and die by the sword, eh?
On a side note, I feel that we are all witnissing a fine example of certain feminine techniques, which you already seem to master…
Are you actually using the “piscean dream weaving tactic”? Was this a conscious or unconscious choice here? If it was conscious, just what are you REALLY up to? Do you have the ability to be aware of your choice and motives of expression at all times?
I can understand if there are things that you have not disclosed and I could be completely wrong here. In my case, I actually had fears of truly hurting someone, due to my aggressive and violent surroundings, as dealt with and absorbed by me. Because honestly, I was at a point of needing the fighting to stop…which is something that had to happen inside of me first.
So…living by the sword would mean that there is some code of “something” that you are already employing in your life?
Then why ask for plutonic “tools”? Well, despite the overwhelming feeling that you still looking for “potential” of greatness here, I would like to know if you are willing to obtain your own “tools” in dealing with conflict, without betraying your own nature as well.
Gatubela, a good question.
My own tools… I asked to learn about the Plutonic approach of dealing with conflict for two reasons: to understand better the nature of a Scorpio man (because my interactions with them brought on this quest for self awareness) and to see if that is something that I could consider too. As I said in my post to Pluto – I cannot. I do not possess the kind of energy required to come out with the same response. It would be laughable and lame. And it would not resolve anything.
I do not go consciously looking for conflict. But that is not to say that I have never created one. It happens by stealth, through defensive and irrational reactions that I may have towards actions or simply words of another. Defensiveness brought on by fear of being misunderstood. If you see my earlier posts up to the turning point – you will notice it there. I would call it ‘passive reaction’. I withdraw, I walk away, I submit. The conflict is still there in its latent form. So what happens then? An aggressive stage. I will argue. And if my buttons pushed hard enough – I explode. All that pent up negative energy would blast its way through everyone else’s leaving devastation and ultimately – no resolution. It does take some pushing and shoving to get me to that point. But it happens, though not often.
I have known that for some time now. I have berated myself for that. So then you are right that I have to think of my own ways. Ultimately it is the control of my reactions. It is finding the calmness within, holding it on. And it is about trusting myself to find a constructive solution to the problem. WITHOUT fear of being misunderstood. And WITHOUT fear of having my solution rejected.
Living by the sword… No, there is no code. I applied this expression only in relation to that particular situation. In my mind I had escalated it to the point of great significance – and it wasn’t. But the dynamics were such that I felt like a warrior – not a natural state for me which took me out of my comfort zone. In my reply to Pluto I will try to explain it better. But you are right, there are details which I cannot disclose – the more I add of these, the more the story become recognisable, and it is a public space. That is why I wanted Pluto to see what actually WAS in there, and what the present was (I wish I could say outright), not for validation purposes. He would have understood then that it was NOT buying someone’s love. Absolutely not. It was a parting. It gave it closure.
What do you mean when you say ‘I was at a point of needing the fighting to stop…which is something that had to happen inside of me first”? As in ‘having a need for it to stop inside of you’? I cannot possibly imagine what you went through, but isn’t the physical side of violence is frightening enough to want to remove yourself from the situation immediately? I am saying this because for me SECOND time was enough to do so. I am sorry, Gatubela. Or maybe I have misunderstood you.
“…Please remember that I didn’t love him, there wasn’t enough time to BEGIN to love him…”
Time does not define or give meaning to the love energy. The ego gives meaning to love through time. WHY try to love someone “in enough time” knowing that they do not love you in return? You have repeated there is no love. Why are you living in the dreams of your head and not seeing your present unconscious role in the admitted loveless game between you? Why force love (which actually delusion in your case) through sending gifts and letters? … Which he won’t appreciate… as you said… “he chose to utilise his power for immediate gratification.”
If that’s the kind of male you want “to love” in enough time… all the best to you.
“…As I said before, my way through life is largely instinctive…”
Really?… Instinctive?… Or Premeditated?… the misguided agenda of “two gifts, a card and free flowing words and a poem”. That plan is nothing but egotistic wishful thinking. Where in your verbiage are both of you committed to actually knowing each other? There is nothing real in your experience.
If your way through life is largely instinctive, why then do you need time to feel the presence of love?… Instinct feels love in the present moment. Love then gives what it actually feels in the present moment by listening from the heart, not the head. So why put off or delay giving that love in the present, when you already know he doesn’t love you? The psychology of your “reality” regarding what you “think” love is or should be, comes back to my vehement revelations of such little stinkers (women) “thinking” that they CAN CHANGE the reality of a man, the reality of his actions, the reality of his obvious disinterest… THEN WOMEN CAN CONVINCE THEMSELVES they are “in love”.
“… But I want to know if my self expression was enough to hurt his sensitivities. It was not meant to. Maybe it didn’t. It was meant to be honest. I HAD to let him know…”
Again, how could you “hurt his sensitivities” when there is no love? Stated here:
“… I walked out of his house at four in the morning when he was asleep. He woke up, but didn’t ask for explanations. He made remarks later a few times – it bothered him. I gave him my reasons. It saddened me that he chose to utilise his power for immediate gratification..”
Your ideas of love are manipulative. Simple as that. They are games which you believe are soul grounded. When in the real world of human complexity, Soul grounded behavior speaks exactly as it feels, exactly what is sees and recognizes in the present moment as I am doing with you right now.
Send him your “flowing words”. Not me. My validation of such words won’t change your needs to manipulate men. I’m sure he’ll continue enjoying the the lower-self power he holds over you. You’ve brought that dynamic upon yourself. It takes two to tango, that includes the subconscious enforcement of ego-imagined-love.
Forgive the flowery style.:)
Pluto,
Again you jump to conclusions, because I think you don’t know the time scale and the details. When I left that night, it was the first and the ONLY time we had been intimate. It was the first time we met, although we spoke before and after. Have you ever been on an online dating circuit? It was my first attempt in seven years. Damn it, Pluto, you are too quick to offer resolutions without KNOWING the details.
I left because there was no love , and I knew there would not be. And I had that one and only time to find out. You say “ Instinct feels love in the present moment. Love then gives what it actually feels in the present moment by listening from the heart, not the head”. I hope the above answers that. I left because my instinct, yes, instinct, Pluto told me. Yet, because we found much in common I wanted this person to be there in my life as a friend. He wanted it too, but with the added benefit of fucking. Which makes me think that really, despite all the proclamations of friendship – that was all he wanted. I said that before. And it was not acceptable to me.
Instinctive, yes. It does not mean I don’t think sometimes. And here it is about the gift… You do not know what it was. When I say two gifts – two in one package, each with a meaning. It was a parting message letting him know that what he does is a ‘no’ to me. BUT it could have been taken two ways: with a humour. Or with resentment. And I believe he took it with resentment. THAT IS ALL THERE IS TO IT.
“There is nothing real in your experience” – there is nothing LASTING in my experience. Except me being on here as a result. It was short. It was real, and don’t you dare saying otherwise, Pluto. DON’T.
“…Again you jump to conclusions, because I think you don’t know the time scale and the details. When I left that night, it was the first and the ONLY time we had been intimate…”
I don’t need details and facts. Not when it comes to the love energy. You don’t see nor feel what love is, nor can you expand your consciousness and understand any abstract perspectives I’ve been telling you. You have not fought and lost in love. So you will never know my universe. Only your little dreams.
Keep your details. Keep your facts. Keep your limited bubble. I really don’t care because you are happy with your facts and details. Love others through your logic. Let me know how that goes for you in the next 5 years. Until then, we are galaxies apart. Good bye.:)
“You have not fought and lost in love. So you will never know my universe.” – this is the theme of most Scorpio men I know. When you know so much about love, Pluto, why is it that you always…. loose it? Why? And then live with the constant fear of loosing it again? And surrounded by the wall of mistrust?
I may be naive and a loveless dimwit, as you graciously put it, but I extend myself to others. And yes, I get hurt. And learn. I am not afraid of pain. You are. And five years is not enough. It takes a lifetime.
Stand alone, Pluto. I feel for you, and I mean it, I feel for your loneliness. Thank you for your time on here.There is lots you taught me even though you think otherwise.
Bye 🙂
“..Stand alone, Pluto. I feel for you, and I mean it, I feel for your loneliness…”
No… Fucking someone soon an early then conjuring the belief that love is apparent and eternal is the real loneliness in human life.
I know through experience what fucking “girl- friends” means.
It is Godlessness. Separated from love and truth. That folks is real loneliness.:)
“I know through experience what fucking “girl- friends” means.” – you would, wouldn’t you… I didn’t, as I have NEVER been. It took one Scorpio man to try and attempt to introduce me to the concept. As I said to you – I declined.
Fucking too soon – yes it was a mistake, take it in context – seven years without. I’ve learned.
Gatubela, I didn’t wish Pluto loneliness. I just feel he is. I will reply to your post tomorrow, it is bloody after two in the morning here.
Thank you 🙂
It is like in the army here: break them down – build them up, a shiny new soldier will emerge. Ah, The God Of War….
Gatubela, I don’t even know if you would want my response now that the God of War is on a path of battle again. I would want to, but Pluto lords here.
Bye
No “lording” here. That’s your take on this.
It would be much more appreciated if someone would just tell me directly to take a break on here for a year or so and go mining for iron-ore out in the Australian outback somewhere… that way the illusion of “lording” won’t haunt anyone’s ego egg to bust a lyric or two.
Hey Pluto,
thts an option. Alot of people are doing it.And I can understand why.Have a break if you need. Everything will be ok.
Now, Pluto, you really are making me BOIL inside, that’s how much you have misunderstood everything. FUCK IT.
“‘I was at a point of needing the fighting to stop…which is something that had to happen inside of me first”? As in ‘having a need for it to stop inside of you’?”
Well, actually because my situation was very severe. My battles were not with myself…or finding the answers. My fears were not imaginary or illusionary. Yeah, that gun was pointed at me.
I did not imagine that I was alone…I really was alone.
I did not imagine conflict…there really was one.
Every solution I struggled to find, was used against me in order to humiliate me and make me suffer…all for the pleasure and comfort of their “survival”.
So i am used to REALLY striving to end it, and that means having the psychology of being able to look at that barrel straight on and throwing myself into the abyss. It is a bit extreme…am still there….am still falling…grasping and struggling to navegate myself out. Just imagine my FAITH.
So yes, the conflict between ego and soul…that battle had to stop first, and I had to find my silence. Boy, that did not go well with anyone!
It is what I have been trying to tell you. You need to feel your energies and listen to them. You are not in my serious circumstances, you only have your psche to deal with, not your physical life and the lives and well being of your children. It is your illusion your are dealing with, not your REALITY.
But you prefer to look for potential greatness with scorpionic energy, with these dark energies “adding”. You are not interested in minimizing it?
Have you evaluated in your being of beings, what it takes to minimize the darkness within the dynamic and soulfully committed yourself to this through your own loving energies?
For me, living by the sword is a strict code of honour and not a code to escalate an issue to classify it as extreme. I actually have a strict code and extremely formal procedures in ensuring that i follow it. There are many things that are preferable, than causing this very real damage to scorpio. Facing truth, feeling pain, finding God, are all VERY REAL states of being
For me, there are things that should not be done (looking for potential in a guy)…and I soulfully live (love) by it…and am willing to (ego) die by it.
“I cannot possibly imagine what you went through, but isn’t the physical side of violence is frightening enough to want to remove yourself from the situation immediately? I am saying this because for me SECOND time was enough to do so.”
Oh yes…you are absolutely right. If that were really all it was. LoL!
I did try to remove myself…but could not. Everything I did, ended up as a minimum, with a death threat against me. That was the soft part.
The world..our beings…are filled with beauty and love, in the light and in the dark. These energies are streaming along side of us, even as you are reading right now.
It is due to the fact that you are BLIND that you can not perceive them. If you felt those celestial energies, you would NEVER have wished loneliness on a person, if you knew what it TRULY meant to not be alone.
You would have wished P.Puppy all that beauty and more.
“… you would NEVER have wished loneliness on a person, if you knew what it TRULY meant to not be alone…” You would have wished P.Puppy all that beauty and more.”
Yes. She did admit she was only human. Meanings mean nothing to her. Only what is man-made and categorized in those Virgin logical fix-it manuals. Males are not off limits to fix-it bliss in her detailed bubble. Proof jiggles in the pudding. Can’t fault her limitations. She is who she is.
Nice to have you around in the cosmos Gatubela.
Hi Ines:
“Gatubela, I don’t even know if you would want my response now that the God of War is on a path of battle again.”
I am sorry, but I just can´t let this one go, even if you are leaving. Yeah..he is kind of a cute eagle and I feel like scratching his head feathers.
Just where do you think you are going with this idea?
Do you put actions behind your words…i.e. are you willing to “go to war” yourself? Are you willing to hold that weapon and be a force of destruction? What does it take to “thoughtlessly” kill? You have been in a couple combat situations yourself?
You have demeaned and dismissed someone and in the state of him making you feel a huge “UNKNOWN”, you USED your own weaknesses and ignorance, (i.e. DARKNESS) to insult him. This is the TRUE reason. That is why it came so easy to you. Your experiences with war have been extremely superficial and observational, because If you had suffered the pain, anguish and absolute sorrow of “WAR”, you would have thought twice. The WORD means “nothing” to you…so you toss it… And that is why you are so scarey Ines. A new emerged soldier? Woah…that is harsh. Is that what you think will be the result of “his effect on you”?
You need to look in the mirror and apply THOSE SAME insults to yourself.
His whole attitude here on the forum has been to avoid “war” (what ever one you seem to be seeing) and he passionately speaks out against it. I have not witnessed the cruel man fighting wars… I have seen a person who has taken the soul time and energy to understand WHAT CAUSES THEM. And that means that he has taken the time, to understand what could have prevented them.
Have you?
Gatubela.
Let me tell you something. Pluto and yourself assign a massive significance to words. And do words matter? Oh yes. I was told at times that mine can cut through to the truth like a knife. Except that everyone has their own style of expression, and it seems to me that mine is very much in opposition to yours. There is no attempt on my part to insult anyone. And if Pluto’s sensitivities are such that he finds offence in a set phrase – there is not much I can do right now. I have seen worse insults from him directed at me, and they were MEANT to be as such. And you know what? I valued this conversation and your combined wisdom enough not to get this in the way. He expressed what he felt at that moment in time. Fair enough. I don’t let it get to me.
Today I was out with ex colleagues, some just that and some – close friends. The first thing that came into my mind was ‘Everything I say and express has to reflect the truth in that moment in time.’ I get it. This thought ran through my mind for hours while I was with those people. It SANK in. It made me anxious. It made me physically unwell, and I am not kidding here. Because I GOT it.
Except… I do it intuitively. Most of the time. I say ‘most’ because it is a big bad world out there. I wonder if all of us practice what we preach 100% outside of this forum.
That is not where the problem lies. The problem lies in the next step – relating to the reality of people I am with, on a deep level. And only a small percentage of communication takes place through the meaning of words. The rest is non-verbal (Pluto, if you are reading this – you will probably mention my Virgo Rising love of figures, with a corresponding demeaning comment? Well, I don’t) This whole ‘word’ based style of communication doesn’t suit me.
Of course those I conversed with today, wouldn’t have a clue (another set phrase, Gatubela) about the kind of thoughts I was having. If I were to try and explain that – they might or might not understand. It was enough that I felt through that and asked myself ‘Expressing the truth is one thing. Relating to the truth of another ‘as is’ at any given moment is a different cattle of fish’. That would be the next thing which will sink in a REAL life situation. I have to FEEL through it in the same way I have done today.
Now, I suppose, you will say the ‘cattle of fish’ is an expression inappropriate in some way… Like ‘ the God of War’. Like ‘Live by the Sword…’.
It is not about me not getting what you are talking about. A lot of it has already been there in me, hidden deep, and all this discussion is doing is bringing it to the surface and making me VERY aware of it. Some of it I have just come to realise. And yes, some of it is still not there, but that is why I persevered with the forum, despite the hostility.
Which makes me think that I have no means of expressing myself in such a way which you or Pluto would understand. If I attempt to discuss any more, such as your previous post – it will only bring more of the same. Dead end. And yes, this is also a set phrase, It has nothing to do with death. It just means a place from which there is nowhere else to go. Right, Gatubela?
Thank you. I wish you well.
Hi Ines,
“A lot of it has already been there in me, hidden deep, and all this discussion is doing is bringing it to the surface and making me VERY aware of it.”
Great…keep on going with that…
in order to continue to get to this:
“And yes, some of it is still not there, but that is why I persevered with the forum, despite the hostility.
Yeah…we are really hostile, if this is the result of our “verbs”.
I hope you understand that TRUE hostility usually does not have as a RESULT, perserverance and introspection. (????)
“Which makes me think that I have no means of expressing myself in such a way which you or Pluto would understand.”
I have an experience that may be relevant here. When I was living through all of my bad experiences, I was never understood. Something basic such as me showing concern (someone was about to get electrocuted), was turned into a life or death situation. Or rather, with me running for my life. That is hostility, Ines. The RESULT was FEAR…for my own life.
Gee…thanks for yet, another word and classification.
“Which makes me think that I have no means of expressing myself in such a way which you or Pluto would understand.”
Oh…you have been expressing yourself. I just don´t know what you want to say.
So…I give you the feeling of “dead end” and you give me the feeling of “huge labrynth.”
Labrynth: a. An intricate structure of interconnecting passages through which it is difficult to find one’s way.
I wish you well too.
You called me earlier ‘combat fish’. How many meanings does the word ‘combat’ have? How many meanings could I have assigned to that, Gatubela? I took it with one – humour. That is all I have to say to you.
“…Let me tell you something. Pluto and yourself assign a massive significance to words. And do words matter? Oh yes. I was told at times that mine can cut through to the truth like a knife. Except that everyone has their own style of expression, and it seems to me that mine is very much in opposition to yours..”
Yes… “it seems”.
I’m not witnessing truth. I’m witnessing another politically bent brain who describes their truth to others. But does not walk it “when it seems” opposition is clear and present.
Just another person WHO DESCRIBES they are truthful and forthcoming in noun (Look at her statement above objectively, detached) Yet this same person DOES NOT DEMONSTRATE TRUTH in their being while in verb. They explain their limitations away as the sheep enjoy doing.
Frigging Hypocrites worldwide. This girl who thinks we value “words”?? LOL!! &%*@%^^….. We have no understanding between us folks. We have had, during this lengthy interaction, POLITICAL ATTEMPTS TO DEBATE. That’s it. More logical analysis and futility.
We value THE DEMONSTRATION OF TRUTH. Not it’s explanation.
Of which has not been honored by her, but ARGUED by this little girl.
Of which again, makes this dynamic futile and ignorant.
I have known real relating with Virgin would be wasted energy the first time around, when I had consciously and heart provokingly went to war with her. In return she puts on a plastic helmet, grabs a pink toy shield and laces up her granny’s old combat boots then thinks I’m a meanie. Well maybe I am for good reason.
This little darling sees only ‘words’ but values my humor? Yet she cannot feel the spirit, heart and humility behind/underneath my spoken joys within, and the substance of who I am ‘demonstrated’ from that place of liberty and humor. She only sees the aggressive words.
Little one “thinks” the aggression in me is a detriment to everyone and to her logical appraisals.
She only sees words.
That’s it.
Words.:)
Pluto, why are you still leaving comments on ‘her’? I thought you quit, done with ‘her’?
“…when I had consciously and heart provokingly went to war with her” – Yeah… The God of War
Pisces, BTW. Don’t give poor Virgos a bad name.
Can’t help but admire your fighting spirit, you silly sod.
Take care.
I can hear it again from afar. Cries from frazzled feminine foes.
…. ” Oh, get over yourself Pluto!!”… “tisk…. you’re so full of yourself!!!…”
Yeah, we’re making slow progress ladies aren’t we.
Hi Ines,
“Everything I say and express has to reflect the truth in that moment in time.’ I get it. This thought ran through my mind for hours while I was with those people. It SANK in. …Because I GOT it.”
I believe P.Puppy was the hostile meanie guy (who many people probably now think he is full of himself) who mentioned this and it resonated enough to “sink” in you.
“I believe P.Puppy was the (…… ) guy( …. ) who mentioned this and it resonated enough to “sink” in you.” – Gatubela, this is the correct statement.
What I said on 1255 is a quip showing the culmination of us loving each other through conflict. See? … It is possible.
Harmony through conflict ladies. If there is only one energy to forever feel in your belly with male Scorpio… it is the natural assertion or aggression of harmony through conflict. This manifestation here in this interaction and during many others prior have been amusing to me. The whole thing is a funny and spiritual experience.
I want to love, in the way I know love… but it’s argued. Constantly. Does that slow my desire for love? Please. You’ve seen what happens. So now should I be warning you that I’m drawing my sword?… LoL. The nature of my Hades/Mars conflict and affliction is the akin energy of a luscious young woman frivolously having fun and wiggling her ass on the dance floor. In that moment, her mind is utterly removed from reality.
Two natures colliding is ‘a natural’ conflict waiting for an opposing reaction. This is simply the nature and virtue of the Universe. When the lighting bolt ignites down your spine, the reaction of clapping thunder follows. Be it up in the swirling atmosphere, or be it in the bedroom while making orgasmic love. Both events have their orgasm. We humans EXIST as the equation above = Every action provokes an opposing reaction.
So from that, I am simply being (doing my part) in the universal equation.
But delicious bunnies want no part of that scary equation. They want the frivolity accepted and obeyed and incorporated into their daily imagery bubble.
Talk about a disconnect of the universe.
That’s exactly what ‘has happened’ a few times here, in words on a page, of me being myself among the good people of this forum.
LOL!!!! I was reading comments on here from earlier posts, and it makes me laugh. The same questions, the same naivety, the same battles… I find this little corner of WWW not only enriching, but… amusing and happy.
Pluto, you talk too much. I understood the concept of loving through conflict pages and pages ago. Sure, you drive me mad at times – never resulting in hate, the opposite. Why do you think I am still here? FEEL it. I may be crap at putting my understanding on this (virtual) paper, but you KNOW it’s coming around… We can carry on ‘warring’ on here, until I ‘get’ the next meaning.
“Every action provokes an opposing reaction.” – Yep. Except what should be happening is the suspension of reaction and trying to RELATE to what is being said. Much harder. You’ve been guilty on a couple of occasions too. Hmmmm…. human after all.
Pluto, what is it like living with THIS level of awareness? Does it make the world a lonely or a happy place for you?
Gatubela, I still want to talk to you, and let me wander in my labyrinth – part of the process.
Toodles
“…Pluto, you talk too much..”
Only because you can’t hear.
“… Sure, you drive me mad at times – never resulting in hate, the opposite. Why do you think I am still here? FEEL it…”
Because you love me. But you can’t say it honestly. Hearts are afraid. Yours is the rule, don’t worry. I have felt before you have even felt. I have thought before you have even thought. I have felt and thought dimensions far more rapturous, murderous and vital which would bury you threefold. You now feel what you feel because I have transformed your perception of you, and me.
Hahaha, you’re teaching me how to feel? and what to feel? … that’s actually funny. Real perspective please. Your trivial innocence would feel afraid of a mouse running up your bed post.
I still powerfully feel that you don’t know real love (have experienced it) from what I read in your mind. I sincerely don’t feel your heart beating, until I change the attitude of our discussion. I see you thinking but not understanding. The gut consciousness I’m in constant frequency with, tells me you’re terrified and overwhelmed of real meaningful affection.
I’m too much for you sweetheart, as I am for most women.
“… Pluto, what is it like living with THIS level of awareness? Does it make the world a lonely or a happy place for you?….”
If you’re unable to read/feel my mind/spirit and soul, I really won’t answer that question for you. Your essence either feels a powerful awareness for my mind complexity and soul simplicity… or it can’t know what I see and be.
I’m sorry that you can’t see the be and awareness of me.
“I’m too much for you sweetheart, as I am for most women.” – You’ve answered my question.
You have been blessed with having fought and lost in love. You are right, I have not experienced REAL love. Nor the ‘real meaningful affection’. And if one hasn’t tasted anything sweeter than a carrot… – one goes by the ‘carrot standard’. I don’t want that. Not anymore.
I am sorry too.
Pluto,
It is the wrong place for me to be.
Words convey meanings. Each word can have many. Meanings evoke feelings. Am I having a feeling in response to this meaning? Or to another meaning? I hate words. They create barriers, they make people misunderstand one another. Because what YOU mean is not what another takes in. Ah it doesn’t make sense, I know. A few people commented on Gatubela’s writing saying they are not getting it because of the way it is written.
I need to pick it up from the atmosphere. I need to feel my way through every intonation, every gaze, every move. THIS is not me here.
I cannot do this. Not like that.
Bye
Hi Ines,
Yes, writing certainly does take away from meaning and feelings. But it is not a barrier. Not if your intentions are to truly communicate, through this via.
I know about being misunderstood. I also know about Scorpio searching for the “shadow” in the message / heart and soul of the person.
Is it her solid truth and being? Or is this just fun and games to her and she is just interested in the journey because it is “fun” and “new”?
Does she take who I am and my whole being seriously? Because I am not playing here.
They can perceive your “weaknesses” in a certain form, and whether you have what it takes to “see those words through”…and the one thing that will “tumble everything down”…in the future.
In my case, it could be “leonine ego”….too much air….doubting….and not seeing what it is all about. Translated in Scorpio it could be along the lines of….”She will fall on herself .”
I can only answer humbly, from my own very strong experiences that….
Somethings are not possible without the presence of love and following your own guidance and energies with trust and faith.
Soulful decisions, aligned in love, are wonderful in that they are energetic. They have the possibility of being “transformed”…there is no limit or barrier, because of the soulful and true nature of it. They can become “states of being”…
Mental decisions only go downhill eventually, and go all “dead end”. And whether you realize it or not, this is you.
You don´t feel comfortable…and that is alright. I love the fact that you need the “intonation” “gaze” and “atmosphere”. Nothing takes away from that…you are absolutely right. As long as the intentions are honourable, right? (Not used with the objective of “seeking potential”? LoL)
But can you talk about the things we have been writing about on a normal day? Pisceans are wonderful at adapting…a mutable sign, right? You can use this wonderful ability to fill water in any fixed form.
The “barrier” that you mention, is something else Ines. I don´t feel it is words…because you expressed a feeling so nicely with the wonderful words you chose.
Hostility: an agressive action or attitude, An act of war. Both are found in the dictionaries. I “virgoed” your virgo rising, and looked it up
Dear Gatubela,
Thank you for the compassion of every word in your comment, I cried and cried… I will try to put my jumbled thoughts and feelings together in some coherent form, and if I fail – so be it.
Because I always fail in that department. There is a great disparity between what happens inside of me and how it comes out. The frustration of it is ENOURMOUS. I am passionate about communication between people whichever form and shape it takes – yet, this is my greatest weakness. I have Mercury in Pisces too…
I am able to take in dozens of possible outcomes of any given situation; they pass through me like jolts and don’t need evaluation. Often I KNOW what the outcome will be BEFORE others realise. Because I care so much, I try to make them see. I fail. I become resentful. The cycle repeats.
THAT is the true reason for inherent hostility, even if I don’t project it outside. I hold it in, and when I don’t – it explodes, and I mentioned that before. Or a combative stance, and I can be very strong headed there and go on for ages.
I don’t want to be right. I just don’t want people to make stupid mistakes where the consequences are massive. Yet, I observe it again and again. Maybe I should learn to just let go. I don’t know yet how love comes into it. I am here to learn.
People come to me. I carry a lot of others’ secrets, Gatubela.
But this is the Scorpio forum… In all my real life communication with these folks one thing that I noticed – I don’t NEED words there. They don’t NEED them from me. Whether work or friendship – we read each other, no words. You have no idea what a relief it is…
Gatubela, this conversation is becoming serious in a sense that I have now invested into this emotionally. I am beginning to dissolve my own being and feel… humble. So maybe it is also about pride. I hate to fail at anything I started. If I started – it is for the long haul. It doesn’t matter if it is soul searching, a project or loving someone. It is the essence of what I am now – to go all the way.It has not always been this way, but developed through my natural evolution.
You have gone through some horrendous experiences, what you have – I can NOT have right now, I cannot even begin to get close. I have a fear of NEVER getting it. And staying in the DARK.
Thank you.
Hi Ines,
Staying in the dark…hmmmm…meaning you feel darkness? I have experiences in that, but i need to understand you better first. What does your inner guidance tell you? If you are used to “flowing” with people and not talking, then you flow in their collective darkness as well?
Darn…if you were here, we probably would not need to talk . But cést la vie. We must write! So, just like P.Puppy, I can only share and hope that they resonate with you.
1. Because I care so much
2. I try to make them see.
3. I fail.
4. I become resentful.
5. The cycle repeats
Let me feel that for a minute.
I feel that this is related to your darkness issue. So….you are not uniting your darkness energies with your celestial ones, and PULLING them into FOCUS as ONE energy, BEFORE proceeding to Step number 2. You need to surrender here, and trust your inner guidance more than anything else.
Only then, can you try to make them see.
So you are one impulsive fishy!
Am I making any sense?
” So….you are not uniting your darkness energies with your celestial ones, and PULLING them into FOCUS as ONE energy, BEFORE proceeding to Step number 2.”
RAISE these energies as high (divine-like) and as pure as they can go, and put them in your HEART. It is what joins the darkness with the light, for me.
If you don´t feel love after that, then don´t proceed. You will be just throwing your own darkness into the cycle, and will nicely proceed to step number 3 as a result.
Listen to yourself and any feelings you may have, and let me know if this resonates with you.
In relating this to other posts, I will “copy paste” a post from P.Puppy:
It takes the unity of two open hearts to engage. To understand one another through truth experienced in the present moment of an exchange…All I can do is be true to my inner guidance…I trust every intuitive feeling, whether boiling volcanic, or passionate, or placidly calm… pulsing through my instinctual core and molecular being. I trust it. I am it.
Oh Gatubela, you got it. You have an amazing insight, thank you.
“If you are used to “flowing” with people and not talking, then you flow in their collective darkness as well?” – pretty much. By absorbing the negative energy coming from another via non-verbal contact. AND making it my own. One does not have to tell me her mum is in hospital, and the husband lost his job, and she is having a shitty day. The negativity of it will be picked up by me before they even open their mouth. I will not know what those circumstances are, but I will certainly know the person is not in a good place.
RAISE these energies as high (divine-like) and as pure as they can go, and put them in your HEART. It is what joins the darkness with the light, for me.” – I have to work on that one, and it can only be done away from here, in real life. Funnily enough, when faced with outright aggression from others, I become utterly calm within. And that calms people in return. It is only when my own frustration rises when things go wrong.
“impulsive fishy” – The word ‘impulsive’ attached to me since I was six, you are spot on. Those who know me say I am intense. Passionate. Complex. It certainly creates problems in relationships – men walk away unable to handle this. I have avoided romantic side for a long long time now. Those who don’t know me – that I am calm, outgoing and friendly. Go figure…
I’ve had some shitty things happen to me, both in childhood and as an adult. But… I am the Light. My innate innocence kept me intact, always. It is a gift from the Cosmos. Pisces have no shell, no talons, no claws. But I feel as protected species, somehow.
There is one expression the meaning of which I’d like to know. What do you understand by ‘emotional intelligence’, Gatubela?
Thank you.
Neptune in Scorpio
Neptune (to refine) in Scorpio (Intense and Secretive)
You and people of this age, tend to dream about matters of a secret and profoundly deep nature in an intense and passionate way. You may be interested in a strong way in matters to do with mysticism, hypnosis and sex. You may wish to get involved in religious or metaphysical organisations and share your deep held beliefs or searching for profound secrets, such as those related to life and death. You may be interested in matters related to spirits, vampires, and other uncertain and vague phenomenon. You should avoid a tendency to believe in things just because they are mystic and profound.
You may experience conflict between one part of you that is intensely selfish (or possessive of others) and another that is self-sacrificing.
Neptune in Scorpio is unafraid of the darker aspects of life. They may be interested in the esoteric, the mystical or the occult sciences. They see physical desires and sexuality as a spiritual experience that is acceptable. They may find interest in eastern philosophies, practices or hallucinogens.
Scorpio Neptune’s passionate nature shows in everything they do, both internally and externally. They may become intrigued with spiritual philosophies that share their beliefs. Paranormal phenomena are very interesting to them. They need to learn to discriminate in their beliefs, and not choose just to believe in something just because it may be profound or mystical. They may be selfish and self-sacrificing, which creates inner conflict for them. Dealing with deeper issues may help them overcome this.
Scorpio Neptune prefers to delve into the deep dark secrets of nature and the inner workings of the soul. They can see beyond reason into inspiration and perception. They can sometimes have a bad temper. If they are not careful, they can lose themselves in drugs or drink.
Neptune in Scorpio is aware of mankind’s potential for transformation away from their current materialism. Neptune in Scorpio can bring a lot of energy through sex, and they learn that they can also bring this ecstasy into the spiritual realm through discipline or blocking normal urges. They learn that altered states, no matter how they are accomplished, have the potential to lead one into the cosmic consciousness. This is a dangerous path, however, and that is part of the challenge.
Hi Ines,
I had to google emotional intelligence…LoL. Perhaps you can help me out more with this?
“Emotional intelligence (EI) is a skill or ability in the case of the trait EI model, a self-perceived ability to identify, assess, and control the emotions of oneself, of others, and of groups. ”
” The negativity of it will be picked up by me before they even open their mouth. I will not know what those circumstances are, but I will certainly know the person is not in a good place.”
Am feeling that….You will not only certainly know it, but you will also certainly BE it as well, because it becomes your own?
If you have no talons, shells, claws or cute paws….you are relying on another energy that “protects” you….
1. If you are able to become one with “collective darkness”, are you able to become one with “collective light”? and subsequently….although you are an atheist…
2. Are you able to become one with DIVINE “darkness” and Divine “Light”, through soul loving heart energies?
Also, with regards to warrior psychology, every warrior knows what it truly means to engage….and how certain battles are meant to enlighten.
Harmony is only achieved after mastering strength and KNOWING with conscious awareness, how to redirect your own energies. I do this by staying “IN LOVE / feeling GOD / DIVINE”.
FEEL that. It is not a passive fish process. You must concentrate and strive to do it. If you can not redirect your own energies, harmony will turn into chaos. It truly gives you the understanding of what it means to stop “battle”…Imagine if you proceed without this awareness!!!
You won´t feel harmony until you can stand on your own Ines. Strange that you felt that someone being honest is an attack.
My son,Sag, mercury in scorpio in the eighth house, complained that all the teachers say that he is the only one who disrespects them. All the other kids are nice. His response was: “They are not behind your back”. I am treating you with honesty, but you prefer the lie.”
He is 11.
Pluto,
Please look at what Gatubela wrote. THIS is what I understand. THIS is what ultimately brings down barriers and enables a greater awareness.
OK, you are not here to bring down any barriers. Warrior psychology. I get it, it is working, I am grateful. BUT… Do you want to be LOVED or do you want to be UNDERSTOOD in the flow of all these interactions on the forum? Loving someone through adversity is easy. Understanding someone through adversity – bloody hard. Which one is it? Or both?
What is it for you here, in this cyber space? Are you searching for some dimension unknown to you yet, in who you are? Question your motives.
Please don’t crush my bones just yet. Let me hold the harmony within, and then you can strike again.
Thank you.
Hi Ines,
Plutonic energies have a problem when “air” is filling our hearts and minds. It translates into “controlling” energies, if they don´t feel this from you. And it will generate incredible derision. You will get a huge plutonic dose of love as expressed in the Unknown, clashing your ego.
P.Puppy is not loving exactly through adversity. He is loving through “BEING”. Who he is “conflicts” with what he sees here.
P.Puppy does not have to listen to me Ines….so please don´t say such things.
I didn’t mean him listening to you. I meant the way you wrote helped me to understand. Pluto has his own way. I have my own. We may struggle through the jungle of those different ways, but ultimately – we are getting there, and I thank you for your time and patience. Honestly. Don’t take it to heart, dear Gatubela
Struggling with doubts, invaded by fears, afraid to dream again…
escaping through involvement in dull routines…
Nurturing virtue because only that makes me feel better…
My energies feel all confused suddenly..its very upsetting..I don’t know how to clear the blockage..
Perhaps that’s why I am unable to feel the intensity of scorpionic energy..Everytime I try to spiritually connect with him, my mind flees to boring routine thoughts..
It’s upsetting.
Hi Cancer….
Is it because you just need to let everything all go and allow yourself to feel your own raw feelings that you feel for him?
Happy Birthday 😀
Hi Ines,
I thought more of your darkness problem…
The air around us is not empty…it is full of life. Can you feel this energy? It should make you feel passionate and vibrant.
Our thoughts take begin as a seed in this sacred place.
Adding a bit of fire, we have will.
Adding water, we have emotions.
Adding earth, we have creation.
The air contains the collective darkness and the collective light.
It our hearts that hold the love energy.
Without love , we feel only darkness and light.
With it, we see that they are ONE.
Hi, Gatubela
“…you can not redirect your own energies, harmony will turn into chaos. It truly gives you the understanding of what it means to stop “battle”…Imagine if you proceed without this awareness!!!” – I believe I am getting there, with what you mean. We just use different language to describe (give meaning) to it. Yes, redirecting my own energies = taking the negative that I pick up, merging it with the light (love) that is in me. Am I understanding you correctly?
Redirecting is also about control. Of self, of own reactions and, subsequently, reactions of others. This seems to be in line with that idea of ‘emotional intelligence’, if you look at the definition you picked up. Generally I always thought that it is about perception, evaluation and control of your own emotional states. BUT I never thought that control of others (and groups!!) comes into it. That is quite astonishing, but makes sense if you think that our emotions have a powerful effect on others. If left unchecked…
Well, Gatubela, this is where I also need work. Words ‘impulsive’ and ‘control’ do not go together well.
Oh your boy sounds very aware of what it takes to be truthful, and only 11!!! Don’t you think our children can teach us lots? My son is Pisces as well, but with Scorpio Rising, Scorpio North Node and a couple of other planets in Scorpio. He is more a Scorpio shade than a Pisces. His will power is self propelling, and his determination is complete. We have an unbreakable bond.
“You won´t feel harmony until you can stand on your own Ines. Strange that you felt that someone being honest is an attack.” – I have been for a long time now. Both emotionally, physically and all other ways LOL. Attack – water under the bridge, but honesty can be delivered in many different ways, Gatubela. I can say ‘Gosh, don’t you look awful today, terrible puffy eyes, you tart.’ OR you can say ‘Hmmm, you look rough today. What’s wrong with those puffy eyes of yours, darling?’ Which one would you REACT to? And which one would you TAKE IN? Anyway, Pluto KNOWS. It’s him doing his thing – how far he can push the boundaries. I am in no pain – made of sterner stuff 😉
Yeah, ‘puffy eyes of yours, darling’ sounds a bit sugary. Couldn’t have come up with a better example. Ouch. But hopefully, you know what I meant.
I feel happy….
Hi Ines,
“Gosh, don’t you look awful today, terrible puffy eyes, you tart.”
“Hmmm, you look rough today. What’s wrong with those puffy eyes of yours, darling?”
hahaha! I laughed at both of them!!!! (uh…what does tart mean again? I had to google it.)
I have never used that word! Any “undermeanings would fly right over me like a supersonic jet plane.
LOL That’s a British English, Gatubela 🙂 It means ‘whore’, ‘slut’ in a colloquial (common language). It can also be used lovingly, believe it or not, but only with someone you know really really well.
We all learn, uh
The world is a wonderful place… even when it doesn’t feel like it at times.
Us Brits are terribly polite… Well, I am not a Brit by origin, but 17 years do get to you. At first I simply couldn’t get why everyone would say ‘sorry’ just because they walked past me LOL. So my second phraze (example) is very indicative of what you might hear in Britain.
“…Do you want to be LOVED or do you want to be UNDERSTOOD in the flow of all these interactions on the forum?… Understanding someone through adversity – bloody hard. Which one is it? Or both?…”
Neither.
I’m not a human sheep in THE BEING of my life. Those days are past. That’s the price of evolution. Evolution is not painless or peaceful. People, including every person I have provoked greater feeling through on this forum, are examples of institutionalized slaves, bound to systems influence, bound and passive to media entertainment, money and image influence. Your very identity, in one way or another, what you think is “right” and loving, is a product of the extremely vicarious system influences hammered into your personality.
I won’t be understood most of the time. I have accepted that. That is but one part of a spiritual warrior’s tremendous responsibility. My spiritual path is unique only to me. So I am not here to force an understanding. I am here to share and give of me. That giving is something of which I do not see in others all the time. I see pretending all around me. I see superficial. I feel different. All I have done and do each day away from writing is to observer and to listen WITH MY HEART. Again, something of which sheep are terrified to do and be because of their institutionalized fear. Their non individualized Truth. Writing here confirms in my intuitive mind and heart that I am broadly and deeply aware of others realities and manifestations beyond the known bullshit, meaninglessness and fear exchanged by human sheep. If you can’t observe, feel, hear and know the illusion I have been exposing all this time, that is your limitation. I’m not here to force. I’m here to BE. And through being, you like all the others will see, have seen… MY NATURE. Not my opinions.
You don’t know the Eagle existence, so you would never understand. I have accepted that Truth… long before you had even thought of asking me that question. I have soulfully accepted my path. There is no ego self-pity “because no one understands”. I have never expressed that fearful lack.
“…What is it for you here, in this cyber space?…”
We are not in “cyber space”. We are human beings hoping, wanting to share and give of ourselves in the present moment. It is so easy to identify the psychology of comments written here, as if we are soulless inter-ACTORS. Acting is cyber space. And cyber space is the influenced personality. And fearful influenced personality is what is considered reality out there. I want no part of that hollow interactive, non-giving illusion. I have shattered cyber acting from personalities doing as they do. And for what it is. Illusion.
“Are you searching for some dimension unknown to you yet, in who you are? Question your motives…”
I question my motives down to the molecular present breath. You need not worry about my motives, for they have heart and soul, they wish to give, not suck others energy dry and feel pseudo smart or important. If I leeched off of human sheep and their pervasive, invasive fears, you would not be reading my heart, soul and powerfully independent mind, right here in the now.
We would be acting, we would be posturing, propping up our mentalities in the written word… to seem cute, to appear fun, exciting, likable, intelligent, popular and tough. Well… that’s if I was an enthused participant for that bullshit.
Lastly, the dimensions I EXPERIENCE, and not think and trivialize, are an ongoing part of my heart/soul evolution to reach and affect more than one person in this life. Because when one lives in the comfort of confronting fears, one knows the limitlessness of ones divine existence.
See the beauty of this paradox– Lives in the comfort of confronting fears.
Again… herds, flocks… institutionalized baby souls fear, they do not know this Truth or it’s existence. It is simply not their path in this life. And I fully accept that. We come full circle again. No regret. Just love.
Remember how you were talking about my “politically bent brain”? Is this what you meant: “are examples of institutionalized slaves, bound to systems influence, bound and passive to media entertainment, money and image influence. Your very identity, in one way or another, what you think is “right” and loving, is a product of the extremely vicarious system influences hammered into your personality.”
I couldn’t get what it had to do with ‘politics’… Funny how the penny drops sometimes.
The penny drops – British = One suddenly gets the meaning.
“..Remember how you were talking about my “politically bent brain”? Is this what you meant..”
Yes.
You are, your identity, is a product of vicariously learned man-made systems. Your thoughts, creations, motivations, perceptions, projections, assimilation, logic, ideas, rules, expectations and desires for living (surviving) in this chaotic, flawed world… are not yours at all. Those “truths” become of you, thanks to the invasive energy of the collective mind, bred here on survival earth. Fears are what hold you back, they hold back your True Individuation. As they do with all like-brained sheep in the respective flock.
Sheep, cows, bunnies, goats, bird species, ants, water buffalo… they all follow each other. As do humans. Comfort in numbers. None of them break free on deep levels, for the liberties discovered in divine individuation. Because they know they will be killed if they try.
And of course, the Eagle is a solitary bird by nature. The male finds his woman and they perch high and isolated away from the chaos below. They as a couple represent or symbolize the eternity of love.
Having said this above:
“…I won’t be Understood most of the time. I have accepted that. That is but one part of a spiritual warrior’s tremendous responsibility…”
This also means I won’t be Loved by many people either.
I will be Feared.
Not because I want them to fear me. Their fears manifest (happen) as a re-action (the Universal equation remember?) to my still and intense mind energy and sexual base (power). So their reacting fears and unconscious innocence are part and parcel of their own limiting intellect vices… including, their fundamental weakness of emotional intelligence—- which is NOT in relationship with their limiting consciousness in their own energy being. = Baby.
My comments can provoke fear in others if I feel we are using, abusing and pretending TO BE IN THE ENERGY of the Truth. Just as equally I can chooses to shock a person. So many people in my travels are either envying me or fearing me behind my back. That is really just their feeling of respect.
What exactly do they respect?
My intense Individuation NOT FOLLOWED as a member of their respective herd or flock. My confrontation and questioning of their “truth”. That’s what they truly respect. They see and feel a literal Individual, NOT IMPRESSED by what impresses their impulses and whims during chatty interaction. People are an easy read for me now, because the measure of their substance, strength, spiritual awareness and personal/sexual power is received (in me) by WHAT IMPRESSES THEM in their heads and hearts. Their personalities of herd likes and dislikes among their own role in their (unconscious) institution of mind and heart.
The human brain gives off immense energy, or mostly impotent energy in the real world of vicarious mass influence. As does the energy of heart intelligence and as does the huge absence of heart energy, which again fails to give to other people on deeper levels, due to conformed, limited and punished fears structured in the flocks thinking and rules of appropriateness.
I feel it all. I respond to people in the molecular breath from a powerful energy of spontaneous instinct. Many brains and hearts following the rules in herds, are not spontaneous while in grounded states of their manifestation. If brains and hearts “seem” spontaneous in their reaction to things, events and other people, these same followers are vicariously influenced by pervasive and invasive fear WHICH THEY DO NOT UNDERSTAND WITHIN THEMSELVES. Thus the manifestation of mans/woman’s ego creation. Which is accepted as real in the bubble of massive herd thinking paradigms.
So again, here we arrive at another whole circle, in that… people who don’t know or don’t have a deeper relationship with fear in themselves, “do not think” they’re afraid of much in life.
Until…………
Only until these same blindly influenced people “experience” a feeling of death, in another person (their dark) or in an event in their lives which……. wakes them up for a quick moment.
But soon after… that persons awakened experience of death, is safety coddled and cultivated back into ego myth, and they return back to their lower-self desire for survival among blind fellow followers in their herd. Their comfortable institution coddles that prior experience of death (scary feeling of change) back into the illusory bubble of the tribe that always was.
Pluto darling, hold on. I haven’t answered your first post, and you are trying to explain already. May be it doesn’t need further explanation, uh…. Think about it. Give me a chance! Be back soon.
I am giving.. not “trying to explain”. Be nice. Or I might decide to slice.;)
You don’t have to ask for chances damned it. You are free to write anytime and to be you without a timeline put in place.
I AM me. Always. No pretence here.
“trying to explain” = “adding more to understanding”. Deal?
Oh you…
Adding on one very important perspective to this:
“..People are an easy read for me now, because the measure of their substance, strength, spiritual awareness and personal/sexual power is received (in me) by WHAT IMPRESSES THEM in their heads and hearts.”
I receive the energy of God, the Source or whatever you may feel of it, when/while receiving… as I am doing right now in the present breath writing to you.
I receive WHAT IMPRESSES A PERSON IN THEIR PRESENT. Whatever is said, laughed, joked, angered, manipulated, demonstrated, denied, feared… all come funnel back to one spiritual question in my subconscious feeling while I’m in reception. That instant subconscious self-question asks… “what LEVEL OF INTEGRITY, what LEVEL OF MORALITY and ETHICAL AND HUMANE REALNESS do I feel coming in this person right now?.. or groups of people as I interact with them right now?
From this innately subconscious question, I get a read on the soul awareness or lack thereof in a human being.
In that breath, the answers happen within me, the feeling as if lightning has struck my heart intelligence. So I wanted to emphasize ‘the how’ behind the why of surface how’s when I said I feel and read a person (or especially groups interacting) in any given moment or conversation. Those caps words in the above paragraph are the how in addition to what I had shared with ya’ll on 1268 & 1269. Cheers.
Pluto,
Just to clarify… I didn’t mean UNDERSTOOD in a sense that someone on here would fully understand WHO YOU ARE. I meant UNDERSTOOD as in every time you convey your being to another – do you want them to understand what you mean IN THAT MOMENT (SENTENCE) in time. Does that make sense?
Again, cyber space… the minute I posted it I knew you would question that. A turn of phrase, damn it, I have to be VERY precise in how I write so this doesn’t get in the way.
Yeah, it has accepted connotations – soulless, empty, faceless, generic space. Of course, it is not like that, it is populated by people, and whatever those people create in it – it becomes THAT. And you certainly are creating a small space in here where no one can get away with superficialities of the heart and of the expression. I have seen it through the battles you’ve had with people – it gets exposed real fast.
“You need not worry about my motives, for they have heart and soul, ” – You believe that the word ‘motives’ necessarily implies something negative? Something people should ‘worry’ about? Not at all. Motive as in something that causes you to act in a certain way, to attain something.
Let’s go a bit deeper.
You answered the ‘WHAT’ “My spiritual path is unique only to me. So I am not here to force an understanding. I am here to share and give of me.” “I’m not here to force. I’m here to BE. And through being, you like all the others will see, have seen… MY NATURE.”
You answered the ‘HOW’ “I want no part of that hollow interactive, non-giving illusion. I have shattered cyber acting from personalities doing as they do. “what LEVEL OF INTEGRITY, what LEVEL OF MORALITY and ETHICAL AND HUMANE REALNESS do I feel coming in this person right now?.”
Is this the ‘WHY’? – “ongoing part of my heart/soul evolution to reach and affect more than one person in this life. Because when one lives in the comfort of confronting fears, one knows the limitlessness of ones divine existence.”
Is this the ‘WHY’? Is this the MOTIVE? Limitlessness of one’s (and your) divine existence?
Now, slice. You KNOW I don’t fear you. I don’t fear something or someone who is TRUE, how can I… The fear of NOT knowing and understanding the truth makes this obsolete.
And Pluto… thank you for sharing.
P.S. What brings you joy?
“…do you want them to understand what you mean IN THAT MOMENT (SENTENCE) in time. Does that make sense?…”
No. That’s why I had said— neither. I am not understood in the moment, which is why I’m commonly feared as a result, not loved. But as I stated prior… that’s OK. The difference is, I have the opportunity to write who I am here, as people can take the time to decide for themselves what they “think” of me. Their thoughts of me are not my concern. I have said prior I do not rave on about this truth of me in the outside societal world. I said I am observant, feel and listen very carefully and speak when necessary.
“…You believe that the word ‘motives’ necessarily implies something negative? Something people should ‘worry’ about?..”
Absolute – Yes, it can. Depending on the energy felt.
You, as a baby soul are not aware of darkness (unknown evil) in human beings. Your innocence (regardless of your physical age) trusts life as peaceful and loving. When you have seen what an Eagle has seen and experienced in many dimensions of humanity, that peaceful and loving reality (belief) dies and transcends. Your reality then sees the capacity of real human cruelty, greed, coldness and abuse by other baby souls and the manifestations they are capable of. Institutionalized sheep are not even aware a Shadow exists. Thanks to the comforts of ego-created myth to escape such realism.
“…Is this the ‘WHY’? Is this the MOTIVE? Limitlessness of one’s (and your) divine existence?…”
I enjoy being. Giving. The motive is learning. That brings me joy. Learning about what is possible within us. Learning about the potential of real love and it’s eternal greatness. If you have to analyse divinity– you are not in a divine state of being. You are in your sheep fluff. Again… there is nothing I can do about your limitations. That is on you.
You are a litmus paper…
“I receive WHAT IMPRESSES A PERSON IN THEIR PRESENT. Whatever is said, laughed, joked, angered, manipulated, demonstrated, denied, feared… all come funnel back to one spiritual question in my subconscious feeling while I’m in reception.”
I feel it. Because you really are sharing. Damn.
“When you have seen what an Eagle has seen and experienced in many dimensions of humanity, that peaceful and loving reality (belief) dies and transcends.” – “Only until these same blindly influenced people “experience” a feeling of death, in another person (their dark) or in an event in their lives which……. wakes them up…”
If one hasn’t gone through the extreme (like Gatubela and yourself), then… there is never a possibility of transformation which grants one spiritual awakening? But that means… no hope for the rest.
Look at what you are saying 😦 This is some message, Pluto. Unless I missed something.
I feel crushed…
NOW you are cruel… I feel like punching the wall and kicking… The wave of despair…
Bah-bah, happy white sheep here with a pink ribbon around her neck, and a bell so that she does not separate from the herd.
I want to cry…
Bye
Don’t feel crushed. That’s not our message. Feel liberated.
What Gatubela and I have shared evoked emotion, it made you cry. Crying in private is very good and nourishing for the heart and soul. Because it releases the institutionalized fears condemned your conformity and by their pervasive control of your personality states of survival. Crying is… in your own privacy… spiritually healing. It is nothing to ever be ashamed of. Ever. Constant strengthening relationships with your own feelings and emotions can teach you the realness of who you really can be, past your limiting sensations today. The larger questions remain, while healing (from shattered ego attachments and illusions to people, things and events). Greater questions can provoke greater bravery in ourselves, which means greater experiences felt (received) and stronger individuation to evolve with the source. But real love must be experienced continuously.
As you’re a woman… you have a profound edge over the male sex for receiving loving energy, or the reception of divine energy. If you’re a mum and you nurture children… that same nurturing of nature (your kids) should or could be recognized and applied into your instinctual feeling states… as exampled while you were crying yesterday. That crying is actually humility manifest.
This awareness of your nurturing love toward children could (if you you choose) also be applied in loving the deepness of your True being… meaning, a forgiveness of the flawed human being you see in the mirror, who is supposed to stumble, fumble and bumble and make imperfect choices in life. You have to feel the perfection of imperfection in your feelings so you can grasp what is possible when you feel vulnerable or afraid in confusion. Never forget to be gentle with your critical self. You deserve to feel greater love potential by being conscious of your self-berating and self-depreciating thought patterns.
Be aware. You will be on your way.
You’ve got no idea just how much I stand alone. All my life.. like a square peg, and all I hear is ‘You are a one off’. Separation.
People come to me and share… I have no one to share with. No on the level I want to. If I did – I would be considered nuts.
Let me cry.
Thank you.
I don’t care if I’m considered nuts, that care was the older frail-ego-self. That self has long since moved on. I now consider anyone calling me weird, boring, too serious, overwhelming or plain crazy a true compliment. That’s because I now see my True Individuation reflected from them. I feel their inability to feel me, because they can’t feel life courageously for themselves. That mental conformity and feeling deficiency is a lifeless, drone-like state of smugness which is there problem, not mine.
I ask myself… do I really want the company (conversation and activities) with people who secretly don’t give a flying shit about me anyway?
My choice from that question is an easy one. I would rather have the company of me… yes my entire being and energy to myself… than the scared, hollow, lifeless drones “who pretend” to love me. This choice of walking away from stagnant relations has only made me stronger the last 6 years or so. These experiences have taught me in past intimate dysfunction with women and with all platonic, superficial friendships I have accumulated.
I can only transform those ‘who want’ death.
If or when you guys watch the Twilight movie series, you’ll realize why the girl Bella wants “to Die” from the infliction of her Vampire lover, Edward. The movie is riddled with high-power Scorpionic being. Both evolved, spiritual and virtuous (the Cullen family) versus the lower-desire of Scorpio… it’s also dark, abusive, cruel and intensely deceiving Scorpion side (the lower-self) who get their kicks on, from abusing and manipulating innocent people. The Voltaire and it’s abuse of power.
The actress in that movie “wants”… what is on “the other side” of her suffocating and limiting existence.
So if you’re reading this Miss Pink… that too is what you want as a beautiful bunny with a soul. You want male Scorpio to inflict you with higher, intense states of feeling…. you want him to abduct you and share with you his tremendous riches and resources. You want him to move you in heart and transform your understanding of love on much more intense and spiritual level. You want to be awakened from your dark limitations (sleep), such as the meaninglessness you exist amid without powerful love, the loveless grind ‘to only survive’ and make a living and have fun with other creatures.
You want the juice of what male Scorpio can inject into you. I praise you for that seeking. Most bunnies scamper away and settle for materialism and games in relating, “thought” to be in love.
Love
Pluto
I had a bit of a revelation while being in my world right now, away from the computer. Then I read this and it somehow relates to what you just wrote.
I will hold it within, to know that this is not a passing flash of lightening.
Then I will share.
Now you UNDERSTAND why Scorpio. No one else will even begin to come close. I am strong within my being. I don’t NEED A CRUTCH. I need a man who will take my femininity and make it his own. Who will show me the beauty of being in the moment TOGETHER, for eternity. Whose eyes will look into my soul and say ‘You belong to me’. Who will not be afraid to challenge me, and will not be afraid to be challenged. So that we both can transform and step closer to our best true selves. THE MAN.
OK, so my journey started with shite. It brought me here. I’ve met you guys. It may never happen. I choose to be alone then, I have been for a long time, and there is nothing in this aloneness that scares me. I feel blessed. I feel alive.
Love
Ness
Loving a guy is keeping him in your heart and staying “in love”. Its what makes it eternal, for if you hurt him, you hurt yourself. That feeling is akin to failing him…failing yourself. Falling out of love with him, feels like the most cruelist and harshest feeling of separation and disparity, because you can’t fall out of LOVE / GOD yourself.
You feel him inside of you. So you have two hearts that beat as one. You wanting “scorpionic” goodies, seems cold to me.
So you can´t keep a guy in your heart, unless you know how to keep yourself in tune with these energies as well. This is where the warrior psychology comes into play.
I guess I am out to lunch with what is really going on in your comments. And am feeling really silly here, spilling my heart out with what I feel when in love with a guy.
Although I have no religion myself…I read this and it resonated…
<>
New Living Translation
Love Is the Greatest
1If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
2If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing.
3If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it;a but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.
4Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud
5or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged.
6It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.
7Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
8Prophecy and speaking in unknown languagesb and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever!
9Now our knowledge is partial and incomplete, and even the gift of prophecy reveals only part of the whole picture!
10But when the time of perfection comes, these partial things will become useless.
11When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.
12Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity.c All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.
13Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.
It’s gone all quiet. I feel vulnerable coming back here, hmmm…. but that’s OK.
I taught myself to swim when I was seven, in the waves of the sea. The affinity I feel for the ocean is absolute. Here in England you are only two hours drive away, no matter where you are. So I drive and sit by the Atlantic when the time permits. Stillness in the blue haze, or a heavy, lead like roll of the storm, or the frivolity of little choppy waves, foaming and flirting with one another… It is never the same, I love it. Still soothes me, but… I prefer the crushing waves, the mightiness of it changing rocks into pebbles and cutting into the coastline. The energy of it reverberates through every physical form. You can almost touch it.
Gatubela, please don’t feel silly spilling your heart. It is taken in with gratitude. What you wrote resonates with me, but of course I haven’t had the same experiences as you. I feel it could be and should be like that, but have never FELT it like that. Love is… selfless.
Hi Ines,
“Love is selfless…”
Hmmm…
Of course it is…your ego is not exactly “part “ of the equation. Nor are those Scorpionic Goodies and Tools either!!!. Nor is seeking potential in a guy! What is it with that?
That is why you surrender. You don´t surrender to a “GUY”…you surrender to your LOVE for HIM, and move those mountains trusting your inner sense of virtue and guidance.
Pisces should be able to pick up those celestial energies, ground them in your heart…truly felt once you surrender your ego, and learn the “virtuous” laws that love truly operates on.
It becomes…the VERB.
You learn them, by staying “in love”…and feeling what it takes in order to do that. In this harsh world, it means that you WILL have to face your “DEATH” in one way or another. Why? Because we have lost “contact” with this beautiful energy as a “society”. I can´t explain it any other way. I wish it were not true…
We don´t advocate harsh experiences, it will just be the natural result of the survival mentality currently out there. You WILL see the darkness of the very people you “comfortably” love, if you rock their boats.
Hello, Gatubela
You are one determined cat, aren’t ya, just won’t let up LOL!! I mean the statement below…
“Nor are those Scorpionic Goodies and Tools either!!!. Nor is seeking potential in a guy! What is it with that? ”
OK, I’ll explain what I mean the best I can…
‘Potential’ is about his awareness and understanding of what love is, in the way we spoke about on here. If a man has no such awareness – he has no potential with me. I intuitively felt this, but have not, so far, met anyone who has the same understanding. I truly believe that Scorpio men have it in them.
And then..After years of conscious uninvolvement with men – I get a Scorpio/Scorpio Mars…
There wasn’t even a temporary superficial shred of FEELING there. I ran into it 100mph, but the whole soulnessness of the ACT was such that I HAD to remove myself physically (i.e. leave) in the middle of the night. I got the fuck, and the feeling of being hollow was overwhelming. He is miles away from knowing who he really is. All he knows is ‘I’ve got the power’. I want no part of that. That kind of power doesn’t have a hold over me.
Mea culpa… I messed up. I came here. No regret.
So Scorpionic goodies… If he has that awareness, no matter how deeply buried – he has the goodies. The rest is up to us.
And tools… we discussed that – not me. I’ll leave that to Pluto.
“We don´t advocate harsh experiences, it will just be the natural result of the survival mentality currently out there.” – I know, Gatubela. Remember, in one of my very early posts I said “Life WILL TAKE you there.” That is exactly what I meant. We have come a full circle.
Oh and Gatubela? Thank you for being here.
Gatubela,
I just read your replies to all my posts posted on 1st November…
I will reply shortly, apologies for the delay 🙂
“Love is GOD…so if you want to be an expert on handling this paradox, you will have to feel GOD in yer heart first. This should make perfect sense for a Cancer!!! ”
Faith in God has always been a core of my existence. The love energy of God flows through since I believe in nurturing love and virtue. It makes me feel in alignment to energies of love. However, I need to constantly nurture this feeling in the present moment to sustain it as an active state of my being. Since the bubble of reality in which we live in is inescapable, the mind often gets tangled in mundane routines and the state of being and feeling at one with the universe, subsides. My worldly path is totally different from my spiritual path. Meaning, our education system is too superficial and that is what occupies me day long. Soul needs nurturing and I try my best to do that and feel God.
“I mean…you can´t send him prayers and hope vibes, when the truth is, you are under his “swoop effect” and are feeling sexually attracted to him..”
Sexual attraction is a sensation I hardly feel as far as he is concerned..for him, my feelings are based more on a loving tenderness rather than sexual longing…the sexual energy is sometimes activated but I feel it more as a vibration radiating from him while I play the role of a recipient that merely absorbs those energies,..
“And you won´t understand what love is, unless you begin searching for truth. Once you feel this truth… (as an example, we can say that there is DEFINITELY something this guy is not telling you…and I am willing to bet that you internally FEEL it, but can not vioce it either), can you LIVE it?”
Feeling the truth..that has become hard for me now..Fear prevents me from trusting my feelings…I am not afraid to face the truth but rather afraid to be disappointed if reality manifests itself in a way that is completely opposite to the way I felt..it has happened recently regarding an issue I felt strongly about and could foresee the direction it would take only be disappointed by an unexpected manifestation of reality..although the line that discerns raw truthful feeling and psychologically manipulated feelings is really fine, doubt clouds my ability to draw the line..it is an inner battle that I have been fighting since the past few days..but doubt and fear seem to win every time..
” Childish impulses to get what we want for the sake of feeding insecurity, does not make us feel solid and powerful.”
I am thinking that perhaps you will not understand what exactly this statement entails…”
Gatubela, I have lived through that experience in the past..I understand and ‘feel’ it from every angle..feeding one’s insecurities does not elevate us to a higher level of consciousness…it merely satiates one’s appetite for approval, a need that you become independent of once you feel love inside…
‘Can you solve these issues on your own? Do you need him to help you? Is he there for you anyways, on that basis of “getting you over this?” and not feeling insecure, through LOVING yourself, and NOT him giving you what you WANT?”
I do not need anyone’s coddling or loving comfort to resolve myself..rather, it irritates me when the people around me try to solve my life like an equation when they have no clue of the variables they are dealing with at the first place..He is lost in his own universe and struggling with his own reality…not that he has explicitly stated this, but that’s why I feel when I feel him…
“Giving a crying baby, more candy or what they want, teaches them that crying is a great thing to do.”
Ah well, I was that crying baby in the past and he never gave me the candy..the result:I emerged as a soulful existence after a continuous battle with my own insecurities…I “am” right now because I never got the candy..
“But perhaps if you think about your life experiences, what has made you become a stronger person?”
I have experienced a tragic childhood that was sunk in the darkness of insanity and psychotic rituals imposed upon me and my simple-minded mom..my dad suffered from a psychotic disorder from almost 8 years..to escape that reality, I created my own reality that was lived through reading novels and studying for school..I learnt to struggle for success since it was the only happiness in my bleak childhood…that was when I made God my ‘best friend’ and sought comfort in faith..but as a child, I did not think much about soulful existence..my past trauma is responsible for my insecurities..i never got the fatherly love that makes one feel strong and empowered…
Materialised… ‘You – LOVE – your – battles’.
I answered in one of my very first posts “I don’t WANT a complete inner peace, this is akin to death. I want a balance of dark and light in my life”. It was an instinctual answer, coming from my core, but is there more to it? How can this be – searching for harmony, yet looking to break it? If things around me come to a standstill and stay that for a time – I get restless, I want the quiet tranquillity of the ocean to transform and become a storm. Does that make any sense to anyone?
Battles which bring constructive resolutions or change – leave me happy. Had a few of those. I’ve also had those where a horrible stagnant situation remained regardless. You know… those trivial conflicts with people where everyone holds their ground and ultimately no one gains anything. The atmosphere of it… The projected anger… The stupidity of everyone involved… I normally don’t start those. But I surely get mightily involved. It usually happens with someone in a position of ‘authority’ and about something I utterly disagree with. I absolutely lack that ‘necessary’ owe for authority figures. Hmmm… Blasted a few people out of the way. Those at work – knew. And would let me be. And how does love come into it?
But I believed that I was the Light? I am subconsciously SEEKING conflict? What the…
We don’t seek conflict. That mindset is playing a control game. Conflict finds us, the energy of conflict finds us… IF… we know our energy for Truth, which means the if we understand the intangible exposure of manipulative lies, of deceit, of games and of abusive behaviors in others– and in ourselves, IN THE PRESENT BREATH. Look… non Pluto/Mars psyches would also find this dynamic very tricky to understand and feel, because the deeper psychology behind abusive behaviors boils down to a persons INNERMOST MOTIVATIONS. People don’t realize they cover up their own Truthful intentions while involved with negative futility. They may think it, but they are commonly to cowardly to say it to the other person because of conformity oppression among the flock. Remember the flock influences the entire thinking and behavior of wooly members in the flock. So digging up a true motivation while in a rocky dynamic (moment) is very rare, even by Pluto/Mars influenced people. Many male Scorpios themselves are unaware of their abusive intent to have control, because the nature of controlling someone, or a situation IS HIDDEN far beneath the person’s surface personality.
We must ‘be able’ to know ourselves in fearless depth, we must be aware of our communication and desires, or the veil of deceitful games we use to get what we want. We have to be aware of our cause in the abuse, which sheep/herd mentalities UNKNOWINGLY do. Truth and Love exists in the present moment. Truth and love exists as an omnipresent energy available for us to receive. IF WE HAVE THE INDEPENDENT MIND AND HEART STRENGTH TO RECEIVE IT. Truth and Love is not measured by linear time. It is not planned, imagined or scheduled. Truth is not “a belief”. Nor is love. That collective belief is of this material, face value world. the collective vessel of any respective herd reality is it’s own limitation for inevitable games and dysfunction among fellow babies.
Survival plays a huge part in this phenomena. Trust me.
Innermost Motivations:
The first thing I do when I see a woman distraught or bitchy or controlling with me… the first thing I always ask that woman is:
“What do you want?” ……….. (long pause).
If she’s too upset to tell me, I’ll ask her again… “What do you want?”………..
I’ll keep asking her that until she gives me a straight answer. Check this.
95% of the time…. SHE CAN’T TELL ME! LOL!!
And all you little Persephone’s wonder why I call you bunnies.
Aha-haa-haaaaaaaaa…. I can’t stop laughing, this is sooooooooo true
Pluto, you rock.
Fear. Of not getting what we want. You ‘delay’ this possibility of rejection by using a roundabout way. It is not even questioned, it comes instinctually, as if it is biologically wired into you.
Blast.
If we carry on like that – I might stop being a ‘bunny’ one day. I HATE this word the way you use it.
It goes something like this:
Him: What’s wrong?
Her: Nothing.
Him (being an evolved specimen he is): What do you want?
Her: Don’t ask. I am in a bad mood.
Him: What do you want?
Her: I’ve had a shitty day at work.
Him: What do you want?
Her: This woman… she is making me miserable.
Him: What do you want?
Her: Me and her can’t see eye to eye. It’s been going on for months.
Him: What do you want?
Her (giving up the ghost): I want to quit my job tomorrow.
Him: What do you want?
Her: I want to know if you can support us both while I am looking for something new.
Him: I see. Why didn’t you say so?
A looo-ong lead to the question in hand.
Which raises another question. Should the male “know” what his woman really wants?… just automatically?
I say hell no. We are not mind readers. (although I’m close). If a woman expects her ego and insecurities coddled by her guy, sans meaningful communication… and that guy does indeed coddle her bratty tantrums… they deserve each other. That pair would totally think they are in love… but they are not. They are highly dependent on each other for safety, from the big bad world.
It is the man who can separate his mind from his woman’s flurry, and not get his balls cracked by her the sexual power over him. A real man surrenders dysfunctional communication to higher states of understanding and leading the negative exchange into something better, by probing her and the relationship itself. A real man transforms her flippant tirades into something at least half-mature. Maturity is another reason women can’t know me.
Hmmm… This connects to your post 1280. Some time earlier you said “Be aware”. Being aware is not going to change the ways of the world out there, although I am very tempted to dive in. You said yourself that in the real world you observe and speak when necessary. Which then brings me to solitary Eagle and his mate…
You CAN create this truthful reality with someone as aware and truthful. Away from the crowds.
That’s what you want. Your own world.
“Maturity is another reason women can’t know me.” – Aside from the fact you believe a woman who could match you doesn’t exist (see your post 1284)… they cannot know you because you are not letting them know you. As you are. In real life.
If a woman was a replica of you – you would murder each other eventually. And a woman like this does not exist. Not the perfect version of her you have in your mind. Not a ready made relationship where there is no need to work on it and get there TOGETHER, bit by bit.
That is why I am looking for a ‘potential’ in a man. Not his perfect manifestation.
“…Being aware is not going to change the ways of the world out there…”
Gandhi was quoted as saying:
“Whatever you do in life will be insignificant…. but do it anyway”.
People in positions of financial power (wealth) actually “believe” they are doing something significant among chaotic, cruel, starving earth, and that they actually believe that they are significant among the perceptions of their followers and admirers. (in the scheme of what Gandhi said) = Myth.
No?…. watch people convey themselves in entertainment, politics and sports. Tell me they don’t believe in the creations of their own self-interested myth.
Oh dear, you are opening a can of worms, and I am not even sure this is the right place to discuss. Leonard Cohen “The Future”?
“they actually believe that they are significant among the perceptions of their followers and admirers.” I agree that they do. Sure, they believe in their own self importance and self value to society. They also truly believe that they contribute. And you know what? They do. This painful process can only be called one thing – WORK IN PROGRESS. No one knows the answers, human egos fight for the best solutions, the way THEY see it. And what happens as a result?
Ancient Greece – birthplace of democracy – society based on slavery. Fast forward two thousand years – not acceptable. Sure, still happens – but is a crime, rather than an accepted societal norm.
Treatment of mentally ill people – England 1800s – The Bethlem Hospital – people chained to walls and living in filth – public charged a penny to watch ‘the lunatics’. Fast forwards 250 years – psychiatric hospitals which allow a level of dignity.
American Revolution – Declaration of Independence – “All men are created equal”… except for Negros and women. Fast forward 250 years – a black/white President.
Suffragette movement in England, late 1900s – political rights for women, including the right to vote – no need to fast forwards, should be looking bad in your book, Pluto;)
It is like the development of surgery throughout the centuries, used to be pure form of butchery. Think of the neurosurgeons these days, and the skill involved. WORK IN PROGRESS.
The point is – if progress relieves the unnecessary physical suffering, hunger, bloodshed, no matter how imperfect its development – it is worth it in my book. So let them think they are important. Let them play those games. WE the public are largely to blame for condoning this. BUT in the midst of it all – things get one tiny bit better. Not PERFECT. Better.
We tend to idealize our historical past. There is nothing pretty about it, quite the opposite.
Nihilism is what you accused me of not long ago. Yours is scarier, darling.
Rip into it now.
“…You CAN create this truthful reality with someone as aware and truthful. Away from the crowds…”
No, not really. Not 24/7 in a persons being. I might inject flashes of a world they don’t know or understand. But I cannot make them fluid replicas of my being.
If life was fair… and people were existing on the spiritual plane I exist… in an ideal human world… ‘every adult person’ in our 7 billion population would earn a capped salary of $100,000 each… with no exceptions. If they made a penny more, they would be fined $20,000 for every dollar over the cap.
Now obviously life (humans) isn’t fair is it… and people are on different levels, different stages of evolution.
“But I cannot make them fluid replicas of my being.” – You don’t have to. Close enough is good enough. Or else – you are all on your own. For ever. But yeah, it doesn’t bother you. Or does it?
… And all the fines collected by attempted greed mongers, that money would go into a miracle fund account which would be distributed to any and every human adult who earned less than a hundred thousand dollars that particular year. This utopia would mean each human contributes portions of their salary to bridges, roads, buildings, housing, and transportation, clothing products and infrastructure and natural food cultivation. Each human would obtain part ownership of which ever tangible building or product or service they contributed toward (not invested in).
Each and every human would share each others resources under this level of spiritual being as if no other choices were available. People would honor each other and give to each other. People would revere the dead in passing and unite with fellow beings and immense love would overpower any dark intentions from the few who tried the mere of taste greed, domination and darkness. People would not fear aging or being accepted because there would be no class prejudice or image illusion among their “stuff”. People would welcome their immanent physical death as a celebration for transcendence into a new life form.
Hmm, I’d make a great science fiction writer.
That’s called communism, darling. Not the lame, half hearted farce that was the USSR. Nothing to do with the real thing.
Well… communism will never happen. Precisely for the reasons you mentioned “If life was fair… and people were existing on the spiritual plane I exist… in an ideal human world…”
Which begs the perspective.
If humans are capable of greed, abuse, domination and comfortable myth… are animals and plants capable of those manifestations in their natural kingdom … in their existence?
These two stark contrasting realities— Human Kingdom survival vs Animal/Plant Kingdom survival… is really the Truth and Substance of what I’ve been sharing here for years.
Which one these Kingdoms is real?
Have you ever seen David Attenborough Life on Earth series (I think that’s where I saw it, so many he has created)?
Male dolphins gang rape a female. I wonder what she thought of that.
Female Orangutans killing babies of another female who was competing for the attention of the alpha male.
Zebras forcing out a cub (or whatever it is called) from the herd because its mother didn’t belong there. And then actually KILLING it.
“These two stark contrasting realities— Human Kingdom survival vs Animal/Plant Kingdom survival” – contrasting? You must be kidding. In absolute sync with one another. We ARE animals.
“We ARE animals.”
No. YOU are.:)
i remember snorkelling through dolphin semen in amongst a gang”rape” of a female dolphin. i felt like i was in the way rather than anything else.
hehe
I haven’t noticed you there in the video, Umm;) Next time will pay more attention, if I watch it again.
i wasnt in the video inessology. lol.
Pluto, it is a gangerous road to take. I mean here, in the forum. This is not why we are here. Politics and religion are the two subjects over which people draw swords. Not the right place for it, uh…
just want to say that yes it is why we are here. called free expression.
be careful with making presumptioms .that is exactly the kind of fear based thinking that creates politicians and religious nuts.
Do you know what I called Scorpio No.2? The Dark Lord of the Underworld. He didn’t mind that. Do you know what I called him in my poem? Predator.
I am sure you could identify with both, from your past, if not now;)
I give to this person sincerity, she laughs and plays along initially, then she abuses what I openly share like the soulless coward she truthfully is. Pea-brain all of a sudden speaks in the language of re-incarnated female dolphin interpreter, who “thinks” female dolphins “are raped” without their sexual consent. She wants to play. OK.
Here. Let us remember and never forget your amazing facts in specific relation and understanding of how male dolphins “raping female dolphins” according to your vast factual knowledge… is understood, plus most brilliantly, your assumption (of all things) that dolphins naturally mating in the ocean are the cause and effect for the existential evil and demise of the human race. Shame on me.
Two excerpts:
“… Are dolphins and porpoises monogamous (mating with a single individual for life) or promiscuous (mating with many others)? Scientists have strong evidence that most dolphins are promiscuous…”
” …When there are few potential mates, however, male competition can become fierce. Two groups of buddies gang up and sometimes steal a female away from another group. Only one group of buddies stays with the female, the role of the others having been simply to help out. But days later, the favor may be forgotten, and the gang that helped may join up with a third group of buddies to steal the female again…”
You’re right detective: “Steal a female” must mean a savage rape. Remember dolphins are not promiscuous. You’re onto something.
You’re right again: Fewer females + a gang of frisky male dolphins MUST in your fine assessment = non consensual sex. Gosh detective… I’m learning in abundance.
Darn hey… how “assumed dolphin rape” dimwits think promiscuous dolphin MATING is an unnatural, seasonal event?… You’re completely right, we better hurry up and get all that semen evidence floating at the rape scene, then we better charge sex crimes against those dark, violent, abusive and evil male dolphins ganging up on a girl dolphin– in the ocean of all places. You’re so right, we should put those rapist mammals away for their non-consensual sex acts and fry ’em for the crimes they committed. There’s a cell in H Block, right next to your padded cell, awaiting the arrival of those convicted rapist dolphins.
You are right on track Detective… seeing the Natural dolphin mating seasons, in connection with existential evil in our human manifestation— who have run rampant in wars, who’ve leveraged financial domination, who have aided environmental destruction, who have raped and abused women and girls for thousands of years causing this human plight… is nothing short of a brilliant connection. Please forgive my prior assumptions. That is one amazing correlation no normal observer could ever understand but you. Thank you.
The human race needs your skillful and reputable input about such violent and abusive acts in the animal kingdom. Those natural, instinctive acts are toxic for the human race, they must be also the cause of your problems at home. Those criminal dolphin acts in the animal kingdom have indeed shaped and caused the human slide into maggotville we see in your research. Without your awe inspiring critiquing of my predator instincts, we would all be lost.
At least you’re not presumptive. That’s me. I’ll have to be careful.
Excerpt:
“…Females, the researchers found, are more varied in their associations. Some stay alone, some travel with a few other females, and some move from subgroup to subgroup. Off Florida, where the females have been studied extensively, they stayed with other related females but sometimes went visiting…”
Yeah as quoted. Females venturing, some stay alone, others travel with a few other females, you said they’re not promiscuous remember… that must mean one thing to you: That horny male, evil dolphins are not dating and courting the female to her specific expectations. They’re just shooting semen all over the place without her approval. If they only knew how to funnel and penetrate consensual sex in a dignified manner and into the female dolphin, those males wouldn’t waste a drop of indecency. Thank you Detective.
Here is your link dim one. Who are you? What do you want?– That’s right … you haven’t a clue what you want. Nothing is who you are. Say something again. Do it again. Be you again. Go on. Don’t leave this forum. I’m just getting started. We don’t want you to go. Your intent is sincere and loving. Your love is felt and appreciated from here. Share more of you. The predator is listening.
http://www.harmlesslion.com/dolphins/ab_court.htm
Pluto,
You are too transparent. Remember how I said I can forsee what others will do? I knew that, firstly, you would be enraged, and secondly, you will do some research. Good on you.
Let me read this through in detail…
BRB
Inessology, YOU DONT GET IT YOU NEVER WILL, at least not without a huge death of your own ego. leave him alone. you are only here for your own selfish means not for others. you are pissed at your own men(scorp 1 &s2) well take it out on them then instead of Pluto.what are you really trying to achieve here?
Pluto,
So you did some research and found out that what I said was true… Did you do the same for orang-utans and zebras? Big deal. Why the rage?
Here is why… It all boils down to ONE word – ‘Predator’. Doesn’t it? Remember that I said it in relation to your past, darling. Here, your post 702:
“For many years, I was ‘that guy’ who would bed women soon and early just to prove in myself that I could conquer any hot blooded in my path (a woman’s sexual power).”
You have been given an amazing gift – a laser sharp perception, an X-ray penetration and understanding of the human nature. I admire this in you, as I would admire anyone who has a gift and chooses to put it to good course. That is what you have been doing, with honesty and courage. Notice the word ‘chooses’. The difference between animal and human kingdoms is one – consciousness. And that implies REASON.
In two weeks you have given me more than I got in ten years. I am grateful. I rely on very similar modes of communication to yours . You are bloody just as sensitive and intense as I am. And yeah, I am a Fire Horse. Fire, darling. But…
I do not neglect KNOWLEDGE. Knowledge is power. Not in the sense of power to control others, no. Knowledge too makes you AWARE. A different kind of awareness. Emotions + reason. And the truth is – you can be very rational if you want to. I have seen it here on the forum. Don’t neglect your South Node – Taurean, isn’t it? Grounded.
Did you notice how everything went quiet here, in anticipation of your response? Have you FELT the tension? I felt across thousands of miles.
“Bunnies, don’t cry” you said once. And Pluto Puppies? Sometimes I will wipe away your tears, instead of you wiping away mine.I love you with all my heart. It doesn’t mean I will agree with everything you say. It is an adult conversation. You want ‘mature’? Stop having a hissy fit every time someone DARES you by disagreeing. Stop your rages every time you PERCEIVE something as an insult. Man up.
Now, do you really want me to leave? Or do you want to keep learning about yourself some more? You said you enjoy learning? If you say something on the lines of “I am done with this clown”, like you said before – MEAN it.
If you say that – I will NOT post anything here again.
Leonard Cohen ‘If It Be Your Will’.
Umm, I am sorry, but you really don’t understand what is going on here.:(
“..Stop having a hissy fit every time someone DARES you by disagreeing. Stop your rages every time you PERCEIVE something as an insult. Man up…”
You don’t “dare” squat. Nothing in your writing is risky. Nothing in your head is real. You are not real. Nothing in your manifested thoughts and language are provoking. SHOW ME SOMETHING!! Your drought of self-knowing fools you.
Know what a man is before you make that political lie. Hey, nihilism. You are more dangerous than me, because your lies and efforts to deceive anyone like yourself are accepted and believed in the real world. You have tried to plant those lies and soulless deceptions in others reading this forum. But you will never deceive me. Because you are the transparent one. The people who believe your political seeds to deceive, are people just as limited as you. There are hundreds of millions of you’s out there. You are only ‘human’ right?? I don’t “disagree” with that at all. Only those who appreciate honesty and integrity know what real is and what real means through our core Again, as you do, twist my philosophical knowing into political doubts and fears. You champion fears. You are fear manifest. You are the slave imprisoned in the energy of doubt and fear.
I simply don’t trust you. You don’t earn trust. So don’t tell me to man up. What man gives of himself in your life. None. Tell them to man up and stop being a blinded hypocrite who loves to manipulate… and manipulates to love. They will obey your meaninglessness. Get your “reasoning” straight. I have responded to your games in accordance to the energy and intent and illusion and neurosis you have sent my way. I’d like to see you talk about who the fuck you are instead worrying about my “hissy fits”. But you can’t. Conformity controls your fear. Fear controls your reality. You have proven to yourself games work for you in the fearful lies of your life. That’s fine. Use that normalcy on others.
And don’t tell em you know what “grounded” is. Don’t tell me what a grounded being is. When you yourself are the written demonstration/manifestation of the disillusionment and hypocrisy followed and believed in your conformed and fearful creations. Nothing of your being is grounded. Nothing of you IS HERE with me in the present. Because you are transparent through my vision. You’re not transparent to conformed herds. The masses. Thus my history of responding here is to give you back what you are impossibly unable to see.
“…Now, do you really want me to leave? Or do you want to keep learning about yourself some more? You said you enjoy learning? If you say something on the lines of “I am done with this clown”, like you said before – MEAN it…”
I have meant every word written. Still have here in the present and detached objective as I speak. I mean every molecule of me. However my kindness and awareness has been trivialized by a trivial ego limitation and fear. I have simply responded to what I see missing profoundly through your immense lack of self-knowledge. Not your “knowledge”.
If you knew the power of knowledge, you’d be able to make a decision in the present breath, in your head about me, without the political hollow heart deception and psychosis to compete through the spoken word. If you were a glimmer of soulful groundedness, you would not need me to keep writing about what you don’t see.
You mirror the classic female Scorpio neurosis from what I have experienced in your fear. I will never be gentle to the nihilism applied and abused among innocent people. And I will never be thanked for stopping such illusion either. I will be resented. So spare me your contrived gratitude. You want a response from me. But as the coward you are, it is not the response you yearn for to maintain your ego limitations.
I don’t learn a thing from you about the deceptions I unveil in you. All I am doing is feeding the redundant nihilism in your head, so it can fuel further deceit in your responses, which will happen after this post. And on and on, and on, and on your game goes. In your head. Not mine. So no love is or ever has been experienced here, because you are not in soul with the present breath. You need to know your soul before you think you can “reason” your soul with others. Thus your futility with yourself and the futility experienced in your intimacy. Your existence is the antithesis of intimacy— AS I UNDERSTAND IT. (not your flock, they understand your shallow perfectly).
I don’t care how “rational’ you think I should be to feed your illusions of perfection. There’s no realness here. I have been talking to myself because of the existential gap discerned in my post. Not your posts. So yes, I am learning more about me. But the hypocrisy of who you are and who you are not remains deceitfully unspoken— To you, and to your flock.
If I was the flock, you would be reading what you understand.
OK, carry on raging. In the meantime:
This is what you wrote in your reply to the post 1084: “…. Evolutionarily speaking and metaphorically speaking… men are just the same. Men hunt to survive just as the animals need to. Men thirst for SURVIVAL just as the animals must do. Men fight and compete with other men just as two alpha-male animals within the same species fight, in order to remind every other animal in that family/species who is the King-Pin.”
So, without being aware that we share the same thoughts (and I swear on my son’s name – I have just found this post of yours), I write about it – and you trash it. You contradict what you yourself expressed before. For fuck’s sake, Pluto…
Nah, I am sticking with my first believe – you are HYPER sensitive. And I’ve dragged it out. You don’t trust me? No, you don’t trust me TO KEEP IT hidden. Not from yourself – you bloody well know it is there. From others. You want others to spill their guts to you? And you? What REAL guts have you spilled in front of anyone? You have protected yourself with one blanket statement “you have conquered ALL your FEARS”. Hmmm… how convenient. Have you really?
Now, tell me that you don’t want this anymore. In my previous post I’ve given you an escape clause – to tell me ‘GET LOST’. TELL ME. Or be honest.
You are out of your depth. I will not do this again – to protect your sensitivities. From you.
In reply to your post below – I’ve given you plenty of material on myself. Like the fact that I got fucked (saying this without regret, but amusement, honestly), can give you more details on that if you wish. Like the fact that I have problems with controlling my emotions – in the same way you bloody do. Like the fact that I have been on my own for some time. Yes, facts. Which you hate so much. And you are noble enough not to use that… hmmm.. let’s see:
“What man gives of himself in your life. None.” – What woman gives of herself in your life. No answer. You wouldn’t share.
“Thus your futility with yourself and the futility experienced in your intimacy.” – that is below waste, darling. I will not ‘copy and paste’ your own confessions on futility of your intimacy. You only know because I shared. I only know because you shared.
Post 597:
“You’re happily married to a Pisces nature. How rocky and turbulent could ‘that’ possibly be?? LoL….. I know many a Pisces nature. Pisces are far too kind, wise and Understanding of people to extract any hidden fears, motives or compulsions out of another”.
Maybe I am not that wise, after all.
…So you have made your conclusions, or replies about me, and of me, only because— I have given in detail.
Had I not wrote anything here in detail— You would not have the material to use as a manipulative tool about what I have been giving. If I had not wrote about my core being in detail, Your fear would have no energy source to leech an energy more powerful than you, in what I wrote (given).
In stark contrast:
You have given nothing of you in return. You certainly “believe” you have given “of you”… but all you have actually done is taken….Taken what you ask?… The Truth. The potential for loving Truth.
= Leech.
= Normal societal behavior extracted from my particular energy field everyday and anywhere.
Another blessing I must deal with.
“= Normal societal behavior extracted from my particular energy field everyday and anywhere.
Another blessing I must deal with.”
Stop feeling sorry for yourself, you silly sod. Deal with it.
That’s right. You’re not that wise after all. You’re afraid. Very simple;)
So as futility manifest in yet another of your replies— refer to 1291. Read 1291 a thousand times, or ten thousand. You need it.
“Feeling sorry for yourself”… as you politicize is simply a reflection of your atheism. You are only human. Keep your meaningless reality for you.;)
I’ll keep it on my bedside table instead of the Bible, Pluto – the atheist as I am. Good enough for you?
You are lucky you are THAT far away.
Every time you had a battle going with someone on here – they either caved in, crawled back to you asking for forgiveness (you want me to cut and paste here?) or just disappeared from the forum all together.
I won’t do either. Unless you are man enough to ask. So ask.
“…Every time you had a battle going with someone on here – they either caved in, crawled back to you asking for forgiveness (you want me to cut and paste here?) or just disappeared from the forum all together.
I did not ask or want the games they chose to play. I wanted Truth and Love in the now. They asking or begging for my forgiveness is missing the spiritual point. I can’t force spiritual loving or truth in a woman if she is terrified of something real in the present. I cannot change her completely into a being she is terrified of being. That weight of change is solely on her. Which IS WHY I do not try to re-connect further as I had soulfully did with them (and you) repeatedly in the past. Their (your) path is their (your) path. I cannot force my path into their reality. Their reality is what comforts and conforms them (you) which IS WHY they chose to leave.
Bottom line:
The women who have run from real intimacy with me, have simply brought that destiny upon themselves in their attempts to manipulate and deceive. As a result, all they (you) have done is deceive yourselves from incredible love and personal/spiritual growth with me. They (you) have not taken the courage of responsibility in love. They (you) have abused the love potential in each moment I wanted and offered. They (you) CHOSE RUNNING for the result of separation. I did not force them to separate their beauty from the divine in the present energy and run.
Each of you are shown as the manifestations of running away from the power and virtue of eternal love. Via separation from the powerful energy source present between us and within us. In their (your) case—- Ego has won out. That has been the common theme in my evolution. Ego is why atheism reality exists, and believed in the first place.
In fact somewhere back on the forum, I had admitted for years I was in an atheist state of functioning. I was lost and afraid of my own intensity and conflicting inner-war. Life for many years in my past held no meaning at all, no Truth or Love. I had wanted to seek the cause of my past misery deeply. So I chose every day to seek in solitude and with courage to face the Truth. I wanted to know what my misery meant, regardless of the ego consumption to deny the Truth… and why ego/personality function consumed me every moment. So I began learning. Atheism then began feeling very foolish in my learning. Atheism felt very self-consumed, trapped and stroked in a meaningless egg among my feelings for the people who I had experienced intensely through life. Atheism was slowly realized within me as the gripping fear of something (a higher power) far greater and more powerful than my own intellect and logical existence could conceive. The “belief” of my self-pity egg reality during those times (and still is) dissolving as I was seeking the truth in my soul BY VIRTUE OF FINDING MEANING through my many years of ambivalence, confusion, stagnation and pain.
So……. for you to coldly say to me… “stop feeling for myself”… made me laugh in humility. Because if that’s what you really “think” in your naive soul, then I laugh because I feel for your frustrations. It’s funny… because if I actually did feel sorry for myself… I would not know my True-self in depth and in spiritual expansion of soul. I would also “think” as you do in your reality, think— THAT ACUTE SENSITIVITY IN THIS WORLD IS A WEAKNESS. Hahahaha. Knowing the power of our sensitive capacity is the reason for your fear, limitation and stagnation. Those fears BECAUSE OF SENSITIVE POWER have controlled your baby soul’s life. Fears control you. You don’t control your fears (Sensitivity). If I actually felt sorry for myself I would not be sending you (the public) the omnipresent energy of who I am through the written/spoken word.
Do you know what I would have done (chosen) if I was feeling sorry for myself?
I would have chosen, or be doing what I had lived through in my past stage of evolution. This means I would have not engaged/written a damned thing on here. I simply would be content on feeling safe and coddled with my misery away from real sharing and growing here.
Full circle again. Women have left because of the comfort of their limitation and misery. They want that safety. So who am I… to go begging for them to be different. They are not different. Again another full circle. They are the flock.
NOW you are making sense again.
Not coldly. Never.
I am not leaving, Pluto, I don’t want safety. I am just too knacked to answer right now…………………………………………
“but all you have actually done is taken….Taken what you ask?… The Truth. The potential for loving Truth.” – you are actually right there. I have taken and I have TAKEN IN. I don’t believe I can yet GIVE to others on this forum in the way you are doing, because I have not yet arrived at all the answers and understanding for myself.And imagine if I contributed in replying to others’ posts uh… For instance, I would have liked to share in reply to CancerianPink a few days ago. But your violent reactions every time I disagree with you – do not help.
If you cannot bring yourself to ask me to go – just keep silence. If that saves your face, Pluto
Gosh, talk about having a temper…
Take care
Gosh Ines! Calm down girl!!!!
I am a follower of this forum and I have read your posts. I have moon in Pisces and Virgo rising too! (Taurus Mars & Sun in the 8th house). We may have different life experiences but for some reason your posts (the feelings resonates with me) it brings back sad memories…. memories before my “death”…
People from this forum have helped me a lot on my transformation journey and found a wonderful friend too 🙂
Ok… from what I have understood from your comments. You didn’t progress far with your scorpio 1 and 2 because they are this and that… you have “labeled” each and one of them. Their story did not meet your own story (in your head). But did you look inside your heart? What did you see? How would you label it? Can someone really live up to the story in your head?
If you finds out that what is inside is not soulful… my advice for you sister is don’t go looking for “potential”. Especially don’t go looking for a Scorpio…. There are evolved and unevolved ones. You can easily attract the later (could be like the scorp 2) if you don’t feel “love” and “God” inside you. These (deadly) “predator” as you’ve labeled follows their instinct… they feel….
Why are you looking for potential match by the way?
There was a time in my life when I feel like am looking for something….. but I do not know what is that “something” like there was sense of lack in my life. An eagle came and told me “I could be the man you could ever dreamed of” and guess what… he was right darn!!! But why didn’t I accept him the moment I saw his beauty? The moment I saw that he is a “life”? I’ve realized that I have not yet found what I’ve been looking for…. I was looking for me…. I wanted to heal first…
…….I need a man who will take my femininity and make it his own. Who will show me the beauty of being in the moment TOGETHER, for eternity. Whose eyes will look into my soul and say ‘You belong to me’. Who will not be afraid to challenge me, and will not be afraid to be challenged. So that we both can transform and step closer to our best true selves. THE MAN……
That sounds beautiful and dreamy… but do you know what it takes for “The Man” to do that? The madness… the pain…
There is a song called… “When a man loves a woman”….. But how should a woman love a man?
Sometimes this man is willing to die for you but not live for you. He will live for himself. Selfish?? If you see it different perspective this man is not selfish… he can give more….. But Are you willing to die for him and live for yourself as well?
….. You want to know about my sleepless nights? About questioning of my core being and what I project to others? About miles and miles of threading the ground at night? About writing pages and pages of self flagellation?……
I feel for you…..
Don’t go looking for “The Man”(a relationship with a man) until you are healed. Be gentle on yourself and free yourself from all these until you don’t need “The Man” anymore….
Good luck…
Thank you, Lovemari
I understand everything you are saying. And my pages of self flagelation were relating to me having a bird’s eye view of my life – not those men. And yes, I attracted the deadly ‘unevolved’ one – but I was able to see this and walk away.They were the catalyst, not the reason for pain.
I fucking feel pain now.
You are Taurus with Moon in Pisces… I am Pisces with Moon in Taurus… Hence, I hold on to my emotions long after everyone moved on.
“do you know what it takes for “The Man” to do that? The madness… the pain…” – I have gone through the madness and pain. But not with a Scorpio. It was a long time ago, 11 years precisely, my marriage. I am free from everyone now, so the healing is not needed. Knowing myself is. Before I go through madness and pain again. I am not afraid of it.
Thank you. I mean it.
Post 914:
“I may abort talking with you period if that psychosis keeps revealing it’s ugly head. I mean, I’m good with weird… and I’d like to see another male attempt to relate with you the way I have… but if you can’t calm yourself, you already know my response.;)”
Warrior psychology. Except when you are on the receiving end – you cannot handle it. You lose your rag. Yeah, I know it drives you nuts that I find YOUR OWN words to speak of what is happening here right now. Left me no choice, you are deaf to what I am saying – maybe you won’t be deaf to your own musings.
You want honesty – yet you only ‘love’ those who approve of YOUR every word.
You want non-conformity – yet you only ‘love’ those who conform to YOU.
You want love through conflict – yet you only ‘love’ those who agree with YOU.
Dissidents won’t be tolerated. Listen to the silence here, on the forum, right now.
LISTEN TO IT, you fool. You are creating your own world where everyone is what YOU want them to be – loving and cuddling YOU. Because there is none in real life.
I may not have the same experiences as others (and you don’t actually know any of mine other than one tiny fragment). But I GET you better than most. Without explanations. That’s why we are clashing so violently. You are failing to see this. And yes, it bloody hurts.
And I said ONE word, not even relating to you directly as you are now (and shall I question that as well? Maybe I should too?) – and you blow up like a volcano. Some maturity… As I said – DEAL with it. Deal with who you are. Until you do that – I have no time for you. I give you space.
You are still a boy, darling.
… “You want honesty – yet you only ‘love’ those who approve of YOUR every word…
No. that comment is another political, nihilistic lie. Because if I did not love you I would not courageously share and give of what energy exists within me and around me, and within you and around you. Keeping silent in fearful conformity is the greatest illusion, most selfish energy one could be a part of in life.
Individuation… an individualized heart, spirit and soul always has the freedoms to choose and decide to not read and experience what I offer. I praise those who can choose what is important in their lives. People who know what is meaningful for them. Live at let live. If people don’t resonate with my experiences I fully love them knowing their on a path no bestowed for me.
“…You want non-conformity – yet you only ‘love’ those who conform to YOU…”
I had never said or implied in my sharing that: ” I want non-conformity”.. in anybody. You implied that.
All I have shared is: WHAT, HOW and WHY CONFORMITY — IS from a universal, detached perspective. …That’s it.
Thanks to that sharing you have abused the truth and love in what I openly share/give. Again… your severe limitations and fear of other dimensions of existence has always been known in me the moment you finished your first post.
“…You want love through conflict – yet you only ‘love’ those who agree with YOU..”
They don’t “agree” with me. They love me because they feel the love I am re-enforcing within my world, my universe back to them. Thus identification of love potency is felt and appreciated. If you can’t appreciate my conflict, than that limitation of real feeling is on your conscience. I am not responsible for the worlds (people’s) fears.
You cannot love me on this level because your tiny awareness still thinks, worries and analyses in logical terms of agree and disagree. Hey, that’s fine. Keep that separation from the Source— if that makes you feel loved.
I cannot decide ‘how’ you are to love someone or to be loved by someone. That feeling or consciousness is on your shoulders. In you.
“Keeping silent in fearful conformity is the greatest illusion, most selfish energy one could be a part of in life.”
Yes, this is also true for me as well. Keeping silence without the intentions to seek your own self (through divine energies).
Fixed sign – will NEVER admit it, even if he knows it’s true…
Can someone tell me to piss off from here please?
PISS OFF!! lol.. nah you make your own bed. hmm ..can you do that? i do have a spade if you want to borrow it, but be careful with it.
Spiteful, Umm. Very. I am not going down to THIS kind of level anymore.
Hey,
lol, i was just responding to YOUR level.you asked for someone to tell you to piss off from here. You seriously need to take a deep internal look at your own anxieties.I am sorry but I dont have a great amount of respect for you when you show little to yourself or others.
Umm, you don’t need to explain (anxieties maybe?). I didn’t mean the piss off bit, I meant the spade.
Cheers
yes well if you have been LISTENING you would take notice of what has been said to you by everybody here. you truly want to get involved with plutonic forces then you must be prepared to surrender your ego.death meaning transformative death.death of your ego. there i made it easier for you so you dont have to go and re-read everything second time round.cheers to you too!
“…you cannot handle it. You lose your rag…”
As evidenced again. That’s the level of human I’ve been giving to. I told you I am feared and resented.:)
“.. Yeah, I know it drives you nuts that I find YOUR OWN words to speak of what is happening here right now…”
No it doesn’t drive me nuts at all. It confirms in me your fear.
“…Left me no choice, you are deaf to what I am saying – maybe you won’t be deaf to your own musings…”
No again, afraid one. THERE IS ALWAYS A CHOICE.
Unfortunately your fear has convinced you there is no choice.
My “musings” are part and parcel of your atheism. I am not responsible for your fears felt and the stagnant meaninglessness expressed in your futile ego egg. Those “musings” can’t be too meaningless within you, if you sit here in fear typing, which coddles your energy here bickering about the ego-protection you need to compete.
The competition exists within you.
I am not running. Pluto, compare the shite that we both wrote yesterday:
You:
“all they (you) have done is deceive yourselves”
“They (you) have not taken the courage”
“They (you) have abused the love potential”
“They (you) CHOSE RUNNING”
Me:
“you only ‘love’ those who approve”
“you only ‘love’ those who conform”
“you only ‘love’ those who agree”
Notice the similarities? Pluto, from now on I will reply to those posts which are detached from personal drivel which we BOTH reduce ourselves to. So can we please change the style and attitude of this discussion? Thank you.
Hi Ines,
You can only truly love those who love….period.
Great…you are finally showing some sort of inner discipline and virtue. You are missing the plutonic transformative concord jet flying over your head…but those who know these energies, understand WHAT IS REALLY GOING ON HERE.
Not so all over the place, are you now?
Continue….
Gatubela,
Notice that I said ‘BOTH’. I stand by it. And actually, I do understand precisely what is going on. Yet, I allow myself to be sucked in by it.
I care, Gatubela
Nothing has been “reduced” in my being. However YOUR TWISTED juvenile attempts to bring me down to your Godless level WANTED THAT REDUCTION. So for that intent, I have given back.
Your fear has caused YOUR INTENTIONS of drivel in the meanings of your psycho-language, through the manifestation of your logic (seen and proved facts only). You said it before. You want— “everything to make sense”. That psychology right there is not in touch with a Universal Truth felt and discovered in your heart. Hence your drivel and the attempted mind games with me in many subtle tones to control. Not to love.
Your logic is stifled, ambivalent and afraid and thus it manifests nihilistic pressures within you, to (ego) which has/is fighting the darkness I am revealing, and have revealed as we speak in the current moment. The “darkness” (or intangible energies) mean once again the Unknown. In many ways I have sped up your feeling states to feel the unknown + Death. You have experienced deaths of your ego-reality (fact-bubble) Which again… “won’t make sense to you” if you think your ego opinions and disagreements are the only significant element in this immense Universe we (humans) are existentially apart of. So that darkness (unknown or eternity) is naturally in me. Yes— Nature-ally. I have developed a powerful relationship with it. So that’s why I have contributed to your low leeching reactions and lies to deceive a power of love.
“.Notice the similarities?..”
Get something clear in your head. There is nothing “of similarity” in your motivations with me, as mine have hoped with you. Forget the words and “drivel”… I’m talking about your admitted Godless world and “prove-it-to-me-existence. Your reality has felt the power of mine. And it doesn’t like it. So once again… don’t play persuasive (deceitful) politician and make people think we “are similar”… because your continuous abuse of real integrity with me in this exchange has not gained my trust. All you are doing is raising and confirming my continuous suspicion (of your nihilism).
You are free to leave this exchange and talk to anyone here. I don’t want to play superficial salesman with you. The surface games are an easy read for me. Your underbelly is not so playful or innocent. You have not loved that discovery I have given. You have laughed it off. I don’t want to talk with you any further. Thank you.
“There is nothing “of similarity” in your motivations with me,” – similarity of expression, Pluto.
Don’t talk. But I have a feeling that no one will either from that point on.
And here I am sitting and crying… but I will be fine. No self pity.
Bye
The flavour… What the above tussle reminded me of and really made me smile:
I am smoking a cigarette in Scorpio No.2 garden. Two in the morning, it had been raining, but stopped now. He says ‘Stop closing the door and separating. Come inside’. I answer ‘I never smoke inside, in my own place or elsewhere’, He stands by the door, looks out and says ‘It’s raining. Come inside’. I answer ‘No, it has been, but stopped’. He says ‘It is raining’. I bring my palm upwards, keep it there to catch the rain – it is dry. I run his fingers over it. ‘It’s raining’ he says. I take his hand and do the same. He looks at it. It’s dry. He looks out, then looks me straight in the eye and says ‘It is raining in that corner over there’. I laugh and say ‘Unyielding’. Finish the cigarette and go inside.
There ya go…
“unyeilding”? maybe he actually cared about you enough that he didnt want to see you end up with lung cancer..
“I care, Gatubela…
Is this a true statement? I sure hope you are “unyeilding” in that.
Well then get a bloody grip of yourself. You can´t always be flying all over those mists…then throw “potential scorpionic” dream fluffs as “weapons” and then TRY to RATIONALIZE that with conclusions that you will now “stand by”…
You know damn well what happens to you.
LoL.
And stop asking for people to kick you out…youz arez a big girlie fish now….and can make your own decisions….
God I hope you don´t go all ambiguous on us now….but even if you do, we will know that you are feeling rather aggressive because that is how you battle.
Bad fishy! We did not know you cared before!
“but even if you do, we will know that you are feeling rather aggressive because that is how you battle.” – so you have already made up your mind as to how I am feeling – aggressive. What is the point then of expressing anything on my part… Labelled in advance.
No point.
oh for gods sake no there is no point when you keep carrying on like a pork chop.stop being so paranoid, RELAX, stop staying up til 2 in the morning smoking.You are spending all your time worrying and stressing about things that are not in your control.And you are going round and around and around.I know you are feeling hurt, and angry and all the rest of it .so feel it. really feel it. that means you are going to have to quieten your mind, stop racing around projecting what you are feeling onto anythng and evrything around you, and truly start to feel.
I think you’ve been there before too. And maybe even now at times. I believe I need to stay away from here for a while. that’s all. 100mph, remember?
Umm,
As a Virgo you certainly have a more ‘down to earth’ way of expressing things, which is understood by people outside of this forum (me). Cuts to the chase. Much appreciated.
Can you please draw a distinction between ‘submission’ and ‘ego surrender’, in the way it is understood here on the forum? I will then ask the next question.
Thanks
If I were to sum up my last two weeks on here, it would be ‘sweet poison’. Write anything you like into this. I know what I mean. I will take it further.
Thank you, guys
Hey Umm, please be aware. I love you and I don’t want her to hurt you.
Her bait written above on 1302 should be ignored. I mean it.
Umm. Be very careful. This person is cruel and toxic. She doesn’t “care” for you or what you have to say. Feel her lies and trust your heart instincts.
I say this to refresh your memory: you had said a wonderful comment on 1286 …” i remember snorkelling through dolphin semen in amongst a gang ”rape” of a female dolphin. i felt like i was in the way rather than anything else. hehe”
Her reply to you on 1286 said this: “I haven’t noticed you there in the video, Umm;) Next time will pay more attention, if I watch it again.”
Later you innocently replied– you were not in any video.
She was MOCKING YOU. And all you had done was give a loving answer on the topic.
Then her opinion was made clear about your loving intent on 1289 to you:
1289 – “Umm, I am sorry, but you really don’t understand what is going on here.”
So me labeling anyone “a leech” are not just words on a page. Or words said to hurt. A leech is an insidious verb among our energy. This person has the ambiguous thirst to manipulate. And fittingly leeches are also spineless creatures.
The ultimate choice is yours Umm, but I know what she wants.
Love
Pluto
The death of ‘ego’. Hmmm… I do get it. But notice again – no one is talking.
I asked a question of Umm, without hidden motives, trying to understand – silence. Because they think I am not at that level to understand? Or is it the coincidence that it happened from the moment Pluto decided enough is enough? Interesting.
A world where everything is how one person sees it. You either ‘die’, accept it for what it is or… get bombarded by silence. The death of ‘ego’… Well, since I didn’t get an explanation on that one – that’s how it feels for me.
I CAME from the world like that. The REAL world. I’ve SEEN what it does to people. True INTENTIONS to keep one quiet and conforming. Or else – death. This is not REAL. This is a small corner where people talk about ‘love’ and then only ‘love’ one another. Because they FEEL each other? Or because they accept each other’s truth, and only each other’s?
Contrary to what Pluto thinks, I have learned massively. But I don’t agree when there is the gang order. You guys have been on here for too long to see it.
Pluto, I do love you for who you are. But… I am ME. I stand on my own. Always have. I don’t joint cliques. I don’t brainwash people. I don’t look for approval from others. It is TRUE, no INTENT here. You haven’t shown me HOW to surrender one’s ego. All you did was to show that it is possible. Actually, as I was writing this I noticed your new post… THAT is what I am talking about. . And your ‘advice’ to others not to talk to me – another brainwashing. I HAVE SEEN IT IN REAL LIFE. I don’t want to be part of it.
Be well.
Then explain your intent on 1286?…. Coward.
Umm, I WAS mocking you. Because I thought you were mocking me. I thought ‘How could she be swimming in dolpins semen, she is taking a piss’. So I replied accordingly. Were you mocking me? If not I apologise. Every other post directly to you was true, because you were true. No trying to ‘catch’ you or anything like that.
Pluto and myself are too similar in nature. I did say that if a woman was a replica of him, they would end up murdering each other. Well.. we are.
Don’t answer my question, it’s OK.
Bye
So, Umm… Were you mocking me? Be honest. I was.
Oh dear…
Pluto, you may have known and are living the truth, but you are still abusing your power. Right here on the forum. Christ, how could I have been so blind!!!!!
This is how religious cults are formed – one charismatic personality leading others to their TRUTH. You haven’t learned A THING from your past. You spread your message, but are still a slave to your own limitations to CONTROL. Jesus…. And I nearly bought into that. Ran into that AGAIN 100mph….
Carry on. You talk the talk, but you don’t walk the walk. It’s in your ACTIONS right on here, not in your words. I can write you a thousand words – it is in your ACTIONS. And look at mine. Good luck to you.
I am outa here. The fog has lifted.
Hi Ines…..(sigh)
“but are still a slave to your own limitations to CONTROL”
This is a forum, not a religious get together. Everyone here, is sharing themselves…and not according to anyone´s agenda. I will react very strongly to you taking my experiences and the things that I have learnt through them, and reducing me to a cult follower. I feel that I am giving back to people in love…I sure wished someone would have done so for me, when I was searching for it and going through my own volcanic explosions. Alas…internet was not as accessible as it is now.
Again, it seems that you are the one looking for “structure/borders/limits, through scorpionic potential.
“The fog has lifted.”
A great achievement and ADMISSION of your state of being, on your part.
“…but you are still abusing your power. Right here on the forum”..
No. I abuse—> YOU. Every post given in response to you is justified.;)
Enjoy the fog.:)
Unlike all the Leos, Virgos etc. on here – I am a water sign. Who else did you clash with? A female Scorpio? Another water sign. Being a Scorpio she saw past WORDS and moved on pretty fast, away from the bullshit.
Pisces here… They listened with their mouths open, uh. Trusting. Then moved on to pastures new. They mostly don’t have the energy or stamina required to go through with it. I, for some reason, have the fire in my belly. I am the last sign of the Zodiac too – I have lived through all those experiences somehow. Including yours.
I FEEL you. Tremendous emotional energy inside of you which always threatens to come out. It almost feels physical, doesn’t it? It HURTS at times, that’s how powerful it is, isn’t it? No shit, I’ve known it. It CHURNS inside like a ball of fire. It grabs at your throat and chokes. It sits in your stomach pit. It blinds. It flactuates from day to day and hour to hour. There is a NEED to expel it.
I SEE you. Insecurities. Desire to be loved. Inability to show others your inner self. Mistrust. Intelligence of your mind. Love bigger than yourself for those you love. Fear of doing damage to others. Passion in EVERYTHING you do. Fear to FAIL at anything you do.
I UNDERSTAND you. What is going on in your mind, and why it comes out the way it does. EVERYTHING you’ve said or done here during our conversation – I know the reason for. Any reaction you had – I know why. I know every word that you disliked and every sentence that you agreed with.
That great energy requires CONTROL. You have never really resolved it completely, have you… You moved it on to here – a way of therapy. But you still abuse. Here, away from the crowds. Love through conflict? Not through abuse. Some of your writings are full of HATE, read them with a detached view and feel it. You may not have FELT it, but you certainly CONVEYED it. You are a mutable participant out there – and a vocal domineering son of ***** here. Why do you never stay longer and contribute more on OTHER forums? Yes, I saw your posts littered across the web. I’ll tell you why…. there is a healthy ratio of male to female there. Your preaching of ego death to ‘bunnies’ of the world would not go down too well. So you retreat here, where no one can challenge you, the one and only male EAGLE here. It is YOUR domain.
I am not a bunny. I am a WOMAN. I can SEE you for who you are. You fought me savagely, so that I don’t threaten your world. If I agreed with your every word from the start – you wouldn’t be feeling what you have felt throughout. Oh yes you DID. Remember that flash in your face when you read some of my posts? REMEMBER THAT? There was NO love there on your part, just blind instinct to CONTROL. Keep your bunnies. You have no power over me, like you have over them here. If I could face you IN PERSON – I would welcome that, oh yes.
HEAR THE SILENCE? They fear. YOU. They talk to who you say they can talk. They withdraw when you withdraw. They peck when you peck. It has happened a few times on here. They will be loving and cuddly, scratching your feathers. Hey, bunnies, that is not to say that you have no hearts. You DO. You NEED hearts and love to deal with THAT level of domination. THIS is the bottom line of the discussion here, and I got it way back…. DOMINATION and how to deal with it through ‘ego death’. EGO DEATH – this phrase is like a ‘Hail Mary’ on here. A CHANT.
I went through some massive emotions in the last few days. I know you know. I know you felt it. Because you did too. I now have an insider’s view into a personality cult development. Yes, a tiny one, confined to this forum, but that’s what it is. It was enlightening and… amusing. Yep.
You gave me love through CONFLICT, I am giving you HUMILITY through love. Knowing about THE DARK in someone and still loving them – takes guts. I wish you… to be YOU. Everything else will follow from there. Every action has a reaction, right? Be careful with your power.
P.S. Gatubela, don’t sigh. You have THE HEART, I give you that. I’ve seen it.
Bye
“.I went through some massive emotions in the last few days. I know you know. I know you felt it. Because you did too.”
No moron. I was quite contained, laser-locked and calm in my Hades. WHY WOULD MY ENERGY BE UNIQUE AND NEVER EXPERIENCED IN YOUR TINY HEAD??? Unlike you, I am self-mastery. Your experiences send the example of the energy I just am every breath, YES BREATH. Get it?… which I had said in to you in the past “would bury you threefold”.
And this?
“You gave me love through CONFLICT, I am giving you HUMILITY through love.”
You haven’t “given me” humility or love, foggy one. All you have given me is your Godless fear and appraisal. So don’t preach to everyone that you know love or humility or power or control– When the very depth of your motivations fear those energies as again ambiguously politicized through your fear like a smug politician on 1309. When you actually believe, YES YOU BELIEVE AND SAID IT on 1286– in your own thoughts/writing that you, yes you, are a fucking animal……Yes, I know you are.
Last time I checked, “bunnies” were animals.
Know the hell what you are talking about before you praise, deceive and politicize the illusions of the “self” you will never know in you, in me and in everyone else.;)
Ahaa-haaa… Eagles are animals too… Yes, birds are animals, in case you decide to argue that. I didn’t need to check, I know.
I am actually VERY calm now. CALM. And happy.
Answer this, Pluto. You want your word to be the last one. Have it. It’s OK.
No, birds are descendants of dinosaurs. Not from bunnies.
My being is symbolized by the Eagle Consciousness. Not the animal lower-self of man. Which you still don’t get. Your lived lie and thirst for Eagle blood is symbolized by the Leech.
Leech make easy “pecking” grub for dinner.;)
Yes you “know” so much. Dinosaurs were animals too.
However Birds are not Mammals as many dinosaur species were mammals.
Excerpt:
“No, birds are not mammals. They do not bear live young, they lay eggs. They do not produce milk to feed their young. And they do not have hair, they have feathers. They metabolises nutrients differently, they have a different digestive tract, and they have lighter bones.
They belong to the class Aves…”
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Are_birds_mammals
So what does that make the Eagle then?
I wonder if all your “knowing” has connected the dots?
Your past fears (thanks to me) were/are paranoid about “my dominance”??
OK, Here you go, another Excerpt:
“Dinosaurs are a diverse group of animals of the clade and superorder Dinosauria. They were the dominant terrestrial vertebrates for over 160 million years..”
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dinosaur
As quoted, they were… “dominant”. Wait…Me?.. No way?. Go figure?
Enjoy a drink of my dominance if that blood extraction makes you feel a fraction of my energy. I don’t blame you.;)
“..HEAR THE SILENCE? They fear. YOU. They talk to who you say they can talk. They withdraw when you withdraw. They peck when you peck. It has happened a few times on here…”
Now way? Do they? Really? Yes I know. Do you know HOW you leeched that knowing in your motives??
I TOLD YOU with integrity.
This leech takes “her ideas” from my humility shared through-out. This occurred from my personal experience sharing on 1268. 1269. 1271.
Those three harmless posts I had given without fear— fueled the reality of her sickness.
Fear is as natural as drinking cold water. Fear is NOT UNNATURAL in the human being. Yet “her ideas” have promoted fear AS A FEELING WHICH SHOULD NEVER BE EXPERIENCED. Thus her illusions in this life and death. I’ve said it on many occasion that billions of people naturally do fear. That natural ability to feel fear in my life, is as natural as drinking cold water.
This person simply keeps taking and taking and taking. Also known in the leech world as sucking. What else can “you authentically GIVE us???”…. except fear?
Please “give” as you so graciously do.
He-he… overkill indeed. But NOT killed.
I wrote about eagles as birds – and I knew you will say ‘dinosaurs’., You are too bloody predictable (sigh). Yep, feathers from scales. I LOVE Discovery channel. And History. And Science. Anything to do with LEARNING. And am just finishing a degree. KNOWLEDGE. A crime in your book?
“Yet “her ideas” have promoted fear AS A FEELING WHICH SHOULD NEVER BE EXPERIENCED.” – quite the opposite, you dummy. You have described (in not so many words, er?) the multitude of fears that I have. I have been saying all along that fears are what EVERYONE has. Except you, obviously. Or…
Do YOU have any fears?
Oh wait… you are not talking to me anymore. Except for the last 5 posts AFTER you said that. Ah, you were right. Those were not ‘talking’. Those were – abusing. “No. I abuse—> YOU. Every post given in response to you is justified.;)”
So…
DO YOU HAVE ANY FEARS?
“This occurred from my personal experience sharing on 1268. 1269. 1271.” – actually, those were the posts I loved. These were the ones which “fueled the reality of” your sickness:
1288
and my reply to 1289
Live through them again;)
Hi Ines….
I will sigh….
I hate being reduced again to “having the heart”…
I have not seen much humility in your comments (as defined as ” is the quality of being modest, and respectful. Humility, in various interpretations, is widely seen as a virtue in many religious and philosophical traditions, being connected with notions of transcendent unity with the universe or the divine, and of egolessness.”)
But great that you now admit this too…”I am giving you HUMILITY through love”, while saying this:
“. EGO DEATH – this phrase is like a ‘Hail Mary’ on here. A CHANT.”
There is no silence in fear….at least not from me. My silences are actually reflective and I meditate. My experiences have taught me that the only thing to fear, is when your life is in danger and that gun is pointing at you. Feel that for a moment, and understand that I don´t have the need to explode, challenge and “whistle blow” . I have found my peace of being…I am not in the process of “discovering it” nor “fighting for it”.
Your rationalizations are not based on my particular foundation…are they?
But it is nice that you feel that you are the only one able to love someone for who they are, including their darkness. The rest of us “sods” are now lowered to being “bunny button victims” of fear and conformity. Yeah…if you were NEAR, I would want to deal with you too.
You lack the perception of seeing that someone with “a heart” is not fearful, nor blind,is not a bunny and is not dominated. Goodness..love used as a way to deal with “dominant” men, and not having any beauty, harmony and strength related to faith in God or in the Divine.
You know what? When there is “TRUE” abuse, you get the hell out of there. You don´t stick around. You obviously have never been “abused” but now you are “the one” to judge it.
I actually do feel and believe that the collective forum readers will speak up. Why? Because they are able to speak for themselves. I have faith in people, which I can see that this is something you do not.
Besides…you “adopt an ego” instead of having one of your own…it seems.
By the way….having a heart means that “darkness” falls off you. It won´t stick to you like “shit on a blanket”…
Gatubela,
I meant what I said about your heart. If you hate it – OK. You helped me to some breakthroughs more than Pluto’s comments.
“There is no silence in fear” – no, there isn’t. There is fear in SILENCE. On here. Big difference.
“I have faith in people, which I can see that this is something you do not.” – I do. What Pluto labeled as ‘innocence’ – IS my faith in people – to see GOOD in them, regardless of any fears, darkness, conformity, sheep attitudes and God knows what else Pluto lumps into that. I exercise it every day in REAL life.
I feel happy. I really do. Because although I am getting the biggest crap flying at me on here – I don’t run. And I don’t fear.
“I have not seen much humility in your comments (as defined as ” is the quality of being modest, and respectful. ” – Let me ask you something… Have you seen much of ‘modest’ and especially ‘respectful’ in the last many comments Pluto left? Have you?
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE TIME OUTT!!
That’s why you’re lovable Umm.
Mars in Scorpio is known to fight anyone or any energy until the death. I better halt overkill of death. hahaha. time out for sure. thanks.
http://video.answers.com/learn-about-mars-in-scorpio-473977244
hmmm… yes..
so where is your venus placement then?
Venus placement in Scorpio in the 9th house semi-square Pluto. Moon in Capricorn in the 11th.
Your Moon is Scorpio?… do you know what house? so your Sun is in Virgo, which house?… and where’s your Mars & Pluto placements by sign and house?
Moon is in scorpio in the 2nd house( altho one reading said 3rd cusp), Sun In Virgo in 1st house,Mars Aquarius in 6th house, Pluto in Virgo in 1st house conjunct Sun (ruling aspect of my chart)
Conquering fears…
…I was raped as a seven year old by two men. I remember every detail: noise, smell, voices, the semen inside me… I was innocent then. I am innocent now.
…At 15 I held a hunting knife stab wound in my mother’s back while waiting for the ambulance to arrive. Trying to stop the blood with my fingers from gushing out, and thinking ‘She is dying’. She lived. After a six hour operation and two months in a hospital. I was on my own during that time.
…My father used to pass me in the street without saying ‘Hello’. They divorced when I was three. From that point on – I didn’t exist.
…At 18 I moved to the Capital with one suitcase. Not knowing a single soul there.
…Some time later I was homeless. Only for a few months. During that time I was raped again. I was NOT ‘street wise’.
…I escaped by going to University. Beating hundreds of others for a place.
…I got married. Learned English to the level of native speakers. Moved countries.
…I cleaned vomit in EVERY house we lived in. He drank.
…I ended up in a women’s refuge with a three year old and nowhere to go.
…I moved to another town. And started from scratch.
…I fell in love. He said I was ‘too complex’.
…I worked in a neuro centre, with people who lost EVERYTHING in one flash. I formed bonds with people. Then they died on us.
…When I gave my notice at work, my boss cried.
I am finishing a degree. My son is someone teachers say to ‘It has been an honour to teach you’. I was told ‘He is a credit to you’ many times. I have a place to live. I’ve started and am running a regeneration campaign for the residents which NOBODY could get off the ground for 30 years. I volunteer for a psychological intervention programme locally.
My experiences are not unique, by all means. I don’t feel sorry for myself, although there were times when I had done in the past. Neither do I expect anyone to feel sorry for me. Who I was then – is not who I am now. It made me STRONG. I am told by many. It made me WISE. I FEEL it within. I have faith. In myself. AND in people. No nihilism here.
So… DON’T tell me about conquering fears. I do it every day. There is NOTHING that I cannot face now. EXCEPT… my son going before me. And being buried alive.
I know the difference between WORDS and ACTIONS. There is nothing but words here. I will not spill my guts anymore. I have done so more than most.
I asked three people three DIRECT questions – silence. Listen to it.
Coward? Not me.
Wow. It’s stories like this that make me continue to do well. Make me press forward and keep moving without fear. Be well
Thanks, Mac. Links? Yours? In real life, yeah, a different dynamic all together. I know what you mean:)
Hi Ines,
Conquering fears is something that is manifested as part of a state of being, with the end result of finding love in yourself.
So yes, I believe I WILL tell you about it. Why don´t you get off your anger train? You are talking to people who have had similar or worse experiences, as a minimum. I have spilled not only my guts, but my heart and soul.
What were those questions again? Why don´t we start again?
I understand your stories…and I have had similar experiences in almost all of them. Perhaps we can reach a better understanding.
Hi Ines,
“I feel happy. I really do. Because although I am getting the biggest crap flying at me on here – I don’t run. And I don’t fear.”
I don´t fully understand this one….actually, because you fail to mention the perception of the “crap” that you might be throwing yourself.
Now I have seen crap thrown at me during boot camp, and it only made me stronger.
What kind of crap might you be throwing?
Hi Gatubela ,
I am not angry. Calm. But also sad… The questions:
To Pluto:
“So… DO YOU HAVE ANY FEARS?“ He said that fears riddle people’s lives. True. He said it is natural, although, for some reason, assumed that “her ideas” have promoted fear AS A FEELING WHICH SHOULD NEVER BE EXPERIENCED.” Far from what I was saying, look at my posts! He talks about others’ fears and excavates them here. Fine. We are all willing participants in that. But… his own? Current? Not in the past? No? Not shared. He will not answer this.
To Umm:
“So, Umm… Were you mocking me? Be honest. I was.” A simple question to answer. Pluto asked (by adding ‘coward’) if I was mocking her. I answered as honest as. I still don’t know HER answer.
To you:
“I have not seen much humility in your comments (as defined as ” is the quality of being modest, and respectful. ” – Let me ask you something… Have you seen much of ‘modest’ and especially ‘respectful’ in the last many comments Pluto left? Have you?
If you say ‘yes’, he has been modest and respectful… Then we have a very different idea of what that means. If you say ‘no’, he wasn’t… Well… Hear the thunder?
The bottom line is: if people are not prepared to be honest IN THEIR ACTIONS, as well as words, in spite of discomfort and possible resentment of others – I cannot go on. It is about integrity. So if you guys cannot answers direct questions…
Here is the thing… My real life interactions with Scorpio men are… effortless. I understand the dominant nature and desire to be in control at all, well, most of 😉 times. This is the price they pay for that great emotional energy I spoke about. I don’t compete with them; my energy is such that is gives them… peace, of all things. That relates to the whole of your post 748 about Cat and Doberman dog, remember “Ladies, a well trained warrior fights the whole battle, first in the abyss and wins. What we see, was never the battle.”
BUT here… Oh Jesus… There is a fine line between dominance and abuse. Oh VERY fine line. I believe that here it has been crossed, not once. The intent may have been noble, but the delivery was… abusive. That’s why lots of women on here protested. Not because they don’t accept the nature of the man. They don’t agree with the form it is taking on here.
And… IF there is a fight – I like to fight FAIR. Look at my posts, all of them going back to the beginning… You will not find anywhere I contradict what I have said previously. Hmmm.. Scorpio No.2 said to me ‘You are more honest than I am’. And he was quite brutal in his honesty. Reminds me of someone;) No bull here. I can give you a few dozen posts where Pluto said something, and then I can offset those with his posts completely opposite to his previous expression. Or took what I said and twisted it into what it was not. And asking you (earlier) and Umm not to engage in the conversation? Instead of letting YOU decide for yourselves? He doesn’t NEED this kind of manipulation, certainly, not with me. I don’t try to “catch” anyone. And I don’t accept that in others.
I don’t want to win at any cost, it would be Pyrrhic victory. I offered peace a couple of times, remember my reply to post 1301, YOU understood that. HE went ballistic. In real life I would not carry on and would diffuse the situation. And in real life fights like that end with…. white hot sex. Here it can go on forever. We are both as stubborn as each other. Someone has to be an adult. So, whatever other questions I might have – I will look for answers elsewhere. Or there will be another fight.
Thank you for being… noble. I wish you well in everything.
P.S. I believe Pluto has offered an olive branch in his very last post to me – in the only way he knows how… But then again… I might be wrong.
“P.S. I believe Pluto has offered an olive branch in his very last post to me – in the only way he knows how..”
I am offering you questions:
1) Why do you even care what I say here, if I write to you or not? When you “believe” and said and promoted that I am the abusive one?
2) Why is abusive behavior and fear by me something you would want to be involved with, when all you have said is I am only words?
3) Following up question 2. Haven’t you believed I was predictable? Why care if I’m predicable? Why is that so important for you to say?
4) Why would you want to associate with someone-anyone who you believe is only words, childish, dis-respectful, abusive and the true coward?
5) How does any promoted association about me and my abusive messages and words, help, heal or inspire you and your integrity and calmness?
6) Why are my non-healing, dis-respecting words, abusive words through our interaction help heal and inspire your non-angry, your calm, your non-controlling, your non-fearful and your non-manipulative manner, in your words?
To “answer” you here on this.
To Umm:
“So, Umm… Were you mocking me? Be honest. I was.” A simple question to answer. Pluto asked (by adding ‘coward’) if I was mocking her. I answered as honest as. I still don’t know HER answer.”
You only answered Umm “as honest as you can” my question– because –>> I had commanded that you answer her. Not because you were feeling bad of mocking her. You did not answer your own intent during that time of writing (that moment) because you believed you were honest with her. Umm has always sent loving intent. Realness. Honesty. Always. She does not owe your “misunderstanding” any answer because she was not manipulating you to begin with. She has never wanted manipulation. She is loving. That’s why I personally love her.
If you can graciously answer each of the six questions I have offered with integrity, I will be happy to answer any list of questions you may want to ask.
Regards.
Hi Ines,
You mentioned that you are connected to the collective darkness, but are unable to perceive what is going on here with P.Puppy – a scorpio who has also mentioned that he is in tune with this collective? Just try to imagine what happens to his scorpionic radar, when certain states of being of “the collective” cause unbalance. Add a bit of MARS to that…and scorpionic intensity. TRY to understand that…instead of classifying it. It actually happens to all scorpionic men…
Just “plug in” for a second…and really get the vibe. And answer these questions:
1. What is “missing” from this dark collective? (hint:Just start reading the minds of men and women – anything wrong with them?)
2. Why is this missing?
3. What would it take to balance it?
You only see the words….and your own subsequent reactions to them. But the real problem that is occurring in your life, still remains unknown – TO YOU. You don´t know what you are truly battling – struggilng against.
OK…the feeling of being abused: Women who feel love inside them, are able to go beyond these classifications. They don´t stay stuck in these energies, because that just empowers these states of being in our society, but does not empower women to do anything about it, essentially.
Don´t believe me?
We are encouraged to “stay” abused…as these classifications actually do prevent us from FEELING something else – our own very inner energies and power. A woman who does not conform to current societal classifications of “how she should really be feeling” when a guy dominates and calls her a couple of names, is a woman that has claimed her own soulful individuality.
When the shit hits the fan, during bad experiences such as yours – rape, it means that you do not and can not truly feel your own beauty and spirituality. This was taken from you as a potential path that you could follow. And if it were anything similar to what happened to me, there was no remorse either. It was done based on “LOWER instinct” and in the name of survival, lust and “maintaining control /dominance over you. You are just living it out again…through your comments.
We all understand that. You will spend most of your life trying to understand what the fuck is wrong with ya. Society “abuse” criteria, is shamefully lacking in healing a girl, don´t you think? It dualistically classifies “abusee” and “abuser”..and prevents us from understanding OUR role in the whole “IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO”…But the TRUTH of the matter is that recovering from such an incident, requires you to feel something stronger than comfort in separation.
Hence the seeking for LOVE. Any energies dedicated to ANYTHING else, in life, is truly a waste of time.
I’m grateful to take the time and answer all Innes questions with my core.
Clarity:
Whether my “words” are perceived as good, bad or ugly (abusive)… that is not my actual concern. The energy of integrity and love has always been my actual concern. Words versus the Intention through engaging– are not the same. Therefore words alone do not make the Truth. Which means opinions by people do make the Truth. Which means disagreements or agreements by people or any party do not make the Truth. Which means niceness, respect and appropriateness does not make the Truth.
The confusing part for observers about my history here of responsive expressions have been exactly this:
I have “intentionally mimicked” the manipulative games, fears, arguments, rebuttals, politicizing and planted/started comments by each person toward me specifically… yes intentionally adopted… which then brought out the consequential re-actions of futile conflict, non-loving exchanges (for both involved)— which in turn highlighted the Truth, Discernment and Distinctiveness of those specific “abusive” dysfunctional exchanges. The exchange of fear I was a part of– INTENTIONALLY. That fear was obviously apparent as everyone has seen and felt that negative-futile dysfunction manifest itself, away from the Truth. So I don’t need to describe it further. You all have witnessed tons of the above explained.
Which is why my adopted intent in only those “abusive” moments with people, was to give them, and participate with them, what was their world— which made them feel honest and comfortable. In turn gave back THEIR WORLD, I knowingly participated in– Manipulation. I knowingly participated in the games evolving during the ugly, I essentially gave each woman what she (subconsciously) Wanted–> Games–> Manipulation–>Loveless levels–>Cold words–>Deception from Love–>Harsh words–>Uncaring intent—->> I HAD BECAME THEM – to show or demonstrate to everyone reading this forum, that the energy of Truth can be feared– for the only reason, for the hunger to feed our Ego. = Which was manifest. Y
Do people understand what I’ve just revealed there?
So as I said “in words” prior… the-Energy-of-Truth (whether highly fearful and manipulating, or beautifully courageous and open) —>> Truth on a page or words spoken to another is not “an opinion” or “a belief.”
Truthful energy is something much greater than our-selves as humans can conceive.
The Truth is Love. Love is the Divine. The Divine welcomes fearful energy because It knows the Truth is long unspoken. Love does not fear the energy of Truth. Manipulation and fear feels and lies for fear real love.
“The Divine welcomes fearful energy because It knows the Truth is long unspoken.”
Oh yes, this is also true for me.
Well…we can also talk about the scorpionic undercurrent here…and classify it as “truth not spoken”. The divine welcomes the alignment of our own darkness to it, instead of us manifesting it “unto others”.
Surrender….so beautiful.
“..We are encouraged to “stay” abused…as these classifications actually do prevent us from FEELING something else – our own very inner energies and power..”
Yes Gatubela. The dark in man. The lower-animal-self in man ensures women “stay” abused. Men are the evil-energy initially–> as they plant their seeds (mind, money and fluids) and then they “water it” through those abused/frightened women.
Women then do not help their own plight, because of crippling fears embedded and dominated by the conformed reality of man’s world. Example; keeping up with men in business and material wealth. Any normal, attractive, sexual woman has those fears dominating her sexual-spiritual potential. She is a slave to the lower-animal instincts of survival. I see and feel this instinct in women every day. I feel for their plight.
Lower-self Power rules this male controlled world. Not the male Higher-self of Power. The Higher-self supremacy in man, is a manifestation deeply lacking, it is as rare as the white tiger roaming the wild.
OK, rape…
At 7 I was INNOCENT. i don’t mean it in sexual sense, please. I didn’t have THE NOTIONS associated with sex, rape, control. That didn’t have hold over me. I was… pure, as any child would be. So, yes, I was scared. But I had no fear. Fear meant projection of that reality into the future. I had none of that. No guilt. No shame. No fear. No feeling helpless. I just WAS. So… strangely enough – it didn’t scar me in any way. I always, even as an adult, knew it. Yes, I remember the physical details. But I wasn’t touched inside.
In contrast…
19. A young adult. It was frightening. Fear – and thinking ‘I’ve got to stay alive through this’. Guilt – ‘How could I get myself into this situation? Stupid cow.’ Shame – I didn’t specifically FELT that emotion, but it certainly manifested itself through actions – First thing I did after getting home – shower. And to sum all those – an overwhelming feeling of devastation. As if someone ripped the core out of me. I felt – hollow. Then comes the separation. That is even hard to put into words. I still, if I choose to go back there – feel that devastation. I REMEMBER how it was. That certainly touched my inner self.
And that’s the difference.
Hi Ines….
I understand you…don´t go back there…stay here and be yourself.
Hugs.
Thank you, Gatubela. and to you, really. I feel like crying again, but – happiness. What a fucking breakthrough. It is happening. On my way.
“There is a fine line between dominance and abuse. Oh VERY fine line. I believe that here it has been crossed, not once. The intent may have been noble, but the delivery was… abusive.”
Yes, you have crossed this line various times….and the delivery was hypocritical, unvirtuous, lacking in integrity, manipulative and insiduous.
Just because your intentions and actions were not vioced by you, you feel that you are not an “abuser”? But according to your own classification system, you are the abuser too. Don´t worry, abusers are blind to their own behavior and have no desire to resolve anything. They will just prolong the bullshit and make everyone feel that they are the ones who are being abused.
I see it all the time.
” I offered peace a couple of times, remember my reply to post 1301, YOU understood that. ”
NO you have NEVER offered PEACE. White hot sex is not a result of TRUE PEACE.
Religious beliefs often seek to identify and address the basic problems of human life, including the conflicts between, among, and within persons.
Christians claim Jesus of Nazareth to be the “Prince of Peace”, the Messiah Christ who established a Kingdom of Peace where persons, societies, and all of creation are to be healed of evil. For persons to enter this Kingdom and experience peace, Christians believe that one must develop a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, who stated: “Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart; and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)
Buddhists believe that peace can be attained once all suffering ends. To eliminate suffering and achieve this peace, they follow a set of teachings called the Four Noble Truths — a central tenet in Buddhist philosophy.
Islam means the way of life to attain peace. The word “Muslim” means the person who submits to Allah in Peace. The submission to Allah (the Arabic proper noun for “The God”, One and Only) is based on humility. An attitude of humility within one’s own self cannot be accomplished without total rejection of violence and attitude of alliance towards peace.
See also: Catholic peace traditions and Peace in Islamic philosophy
[edit]Inner peace
Main article: Inner peace
Inner peace (or peace of mind) refers to a state of being mentally and spiritually at peace, with enough knowledge and understanding to keep oneself strong in the face of discord or stress. Being “at peace” is considered by many to be healthy homeostasis and the opposite of being stressed or anxious. Peace of mind is generally associated with bliss and happiness.
Peace of mind, serenity, and calmness are descriptions of a disposition free from the effects of stress. In some cultures, inner peace is considered a state of consciousness or enlightenment that may be cultivated by various forms of training, such as prayer, meditation, t’ai chi ch’uan (太极拳, tàijíquán) or yoga, for example. Many spiritual practices refer to this peace as an experience of knowing oneself. Finding inner peace is often associated with traditions such as Buddhism and Hinduism. Inner peace is also well known as the first of four concepts to living life.
So Ines,
Peace is not offered….it is lived.
1)Why do you even care what I say here, if I write to you or not? When you “believe” and said and promoted that I am the abusive one?
Because I love you. Here. On this forum. And I wanted to understand who you are – beyond words. Including the things you will never admit. I know now. You don’t have to say.
2) Why is abusive behavior and fear by me something you would want to be involved with, when all you have said is I am only words?
I don’t want to be involved with someone who is abusive. But I do want you to see that you are. Not always, but a lot of the time. I don’t understand why you have to be aggressive. I want you to see that it doesn’t have to be this way.
You are not only words. You posted many sincere comments here. Those I understood and took in. Abusive ones made me stronger (see answer to question 5), but didn’t make me understand. They made me feel misunderstood by you and very unhappy.
3) Following up question 2. Haven’t you believed I was predictable? Why care if I’m predicable? Why is that so important for you to say?
You are predictable, at least to me.
I care because I want you to understand that there are people who can see you beyond words on here. People who ‘get’ you. Can see your next step, especially when there is a negative energy taking off between us. In those situations I ALWAYS knew how you would react. But I always wrote how I FELT, even when I knew you were not going to like it and were going to ‘slice’.
It is important to say it, because if you know that, maybe you will drop trying to manipulate me and just be honest. I honestly knew you will talk about dinosaurs when I mentioned birds. That you will research the animal kingdom (you chose dolphins). And many other things, can’t remember right now.
4) Why would you want to associate with someone-anyone who you believe is only words, childish, dis-respectful, abusive and the true coward?
I wouldn’t normally want to. I wanted you to come clean and show who you really are – normal. With all the strengths and weaknesses that people have. You are a human, aren’t you? Without being only the God of War. You are that too. And yes, you can be childish, disrespectful and abusive. But you can also be kind and loving and generous and many other things. I wanted this other side of you to be here on the forum. And I wanted this normality projected to me too.
Coward – that came about in one of my last posts, not specifically to you, but to you three who still haven’t answered my questions. If neither of you answer them – you are. They are not that hard.
5) How does any promoted association about me and my abusive messages and words, help, heal or inspire you and your integrity and calmness?
It teaches me to find the calmness and not be thrown into the depths of misery. And if I was in the depths of misery – it teaches me to find my way out. I learn to be strong IN THE FACE OF ABUSE. And not project this to others. Was I abusive to you? Maybe, we understand the word ‘abuse’ differently? I was all sorts of things. I am a fucking animal. And a coward. And a pea brain. And moron. And many others. Pluto, I cannot be dealing with this level anymore. It is not me.
My integrity is always there. THAT I don’t need a lesson with.
6) Why are my non-healing, dis-respecting words, abusive words through our interaction help heal and inspire your non-angry, your calm, your non-controlling, your non-fearful and your non-manipulative manner, in your words?
Because they teach me to control my reactions. They help me to find that light within and hold on to it. I said once that when faced with outright aggression from others – I become utterly calm inside. I had it in situations where I had to break up fights between men with baseball bats. You didn’t invent this. It is a psychological reaction, but it only occurs in those who have experienced crap first hand, i.e. evolved. I have already had it in me – though my life experiences. You reinforced it.
No, I never said my manner was non-angry and calm. Not always, and it reflected my emotions. As for other manners.. if I was manipulative and controlling – I didn’t see it. Show me. Not asking as a challenge, genuine interest. If it came across like that – there was NEVER an intention like that. Never.
Pluto, consider this, please. I already knew who you are, from your posts here. When I posted my first one – I didn’t read many of your posts. As we carried on warring – I read more and more. It gave me an understanding of you. NOW.. take it out into the real life. If I was to be met with that level of hostility and abuse from someone I have just met – I would have walked away. If I were to love the person – I would try to get through to them IN THE FACE OF ABUSE. If it still didn’t happen – I would walk away. The bottom line is: I know who you are. So I persevered with all the crap you threw at me. It didn’t put me off because I knew you. But in real life it would have been different.
There are questions I wanted to ask you. About you. But that means dragging out some… stuff out of you, and I don’t want to make it harder than it is already. In real life it happens naturally. So I am not going to. Let’s stop here. I am going to leave.
I know it is a long and messy answer. Maybe not as coherent. But true.
If you have any more questions – just ask.
“..I don’t understand why you have to be aggressive. I want you to see that it doesn’t have to be this way…”
I was placid on many occasion. But I recall that someone didn’t resonate with that “flowery” language. So all I did was give you what you want.
“..Abusive ones made me stronger (see answer to question 5), but didn’t make me understand. They made me feel misunderstood by you and very unhappy…”
I have never “made you feel misunderstood”. If you had shared with us who you are, ( the Who am I ?) which I was consistently urging, pushing and hoping, you would not “feel that way” as you do. Because we would be sharing. Listening. Engaging. That same psycho-paradigm HAPPENED with each woman I had clashed with here in the past.
“..As for other manners.. if I was manipulative and controlling – I didn’t see it. Show me. Not asking as a challenge, genuine interest. If it came across like that – there was NEVER an intention like that. Never..”
I have been showing you. Consistently. Conflict remember?.. I’m sure you do remember “the feeling” of conflict?…Well, I was “showing” you. Yet you were running from the fear. How else could you know if you are controlling and manipulative or if you were controlling and manipulative? … Would… “you know those energies” if I was sending– flowery, nice and agreeing language?
Women would think/expect “yes”. But that exemplifies their world from mine.
Apart.
Peace;)
Pluto. Did you know that through all that manipulation and control I was GENUINELY seeking answers? Did you know that my INTENT was genuine?
Gatubela. There is something I want to tell you regarding rape, because I totally understand what you wrote. Because I had two experiences: as a child and as an adult. VAST DIFFERENCE. And that relates to ‘inner peace’ and to what Pluto was writing about fears imposed on us by societal norms.
Being me – I have neglected absolutely EVERYTHING else in my life in this quest for understanding. 100% or nothing, always… Time off.
Pluto, don’t answer if you knew. I know the answer. You stayed. Actions.
“..Pluto. Did you know that through all that manipulation and control I was GENUINELY seeking answers?..”
Well I don’t know if you were “genuinely seeking” in in each of those moments. That’s why the energy was rising and boiling for Truth in the first place from me. My provocation and conflict. Your manner and relating energy right now is certainly seeking and natural. But it took me the energy of hell to scare your cotton socks first– to be in this state of comfort. What has happened, is an evolutionary change in your perceptions and feeling of me and in yourself. A transformation.
I would say the clearer answer to that is you “were subconsciously” seeking answers. But I must say… the bratty defiant one didn’t “think” that was bloody seeking during my penetrations. Hahahaha.
“Did you know that my INTENT was genuine?”
It wasn’t sweetheart. Not then. Your ego intent was a defiant excuse and deflection factory. It’s understandable.. during Hades and Mars infliction, you were overwhelmed by the shocking things that I had said. That shock element was important, because without me shocking your knickers off, we would still be bickering and carrying on like lamp-throwing newlyweds. For any energy to feel genuine… a person must know how to subdue (or surrender) their ego attachments. The ego is a created entity all of it’s own — separate from soulful grounded feeling and engaging. — As we are “being” right now.
“..As we are “being” right now”
Correction:
As we were “being” then.
“For any energy to feel genuine… a person must know how to subdue (or surrender) their ego attachments.”
As a child you don’t have that EGO. You don’t rationalise the world around you. Your are just being in it.
(sigh) there is some Quantum Leap required…. back
” I ALWAYS knew how you would react. But I always wrote how I FELT, even when I knew you were not going to like it and were going to ‘slice’.”
Yes. I know “how you felt”. Please plug into 1323 for more understanding as I shared it there. You “always knew my re-actions” Ines (see 1323)… because —> I intentionally applied my shallow and hurtful energies (messages) into your known world. Your World—> for my real intent– To demonstrate with others reading on this public forum, the power of Fear Fear manifest in the blind, argumentative and manipulative MOMENT. I had consciously and intentionally included myself IN YOUR WORLD for the intentions to promote lies, games, aggressive abuse and consequential fears, while avoiding, denying, not seeing our real-soul-truth energy which was suppressed in our imaginations. You as a Pisces nature, must know this from me personally… that I “am able” –> to be… to mimic… and to adopt… the feeling mindset and feeling reality AS IT IS for thousands of different types of personalities. I CAN, IF I CHOOSE through Osmosis, be in that fear of any person, be in that fear for thousands of different styles of “psychological” structures and emotions and conformity in others minds. I am Pisces Rising… so Ines.. we WERE similar, Were similar. as you have stated, because I made that hurtful lie–> REAL AND MANIFEST through my dark-intense aggressive Hades/Mars energy. I had deeply and consciously adopted your fears to argue and manipulate AND BE APART OF YOUR MIND, YOUR WORLD. I did not choose that absorption of fear (aggressive inflection and affliction) UNCONSCIOUSLY in those respective moments (or breaths). Can you feel and understand what I have just said with you here?
“I wouldn’t normally want to. I wanted you to come clean and show who you really are – normal.”
Sweetheart. You make me smile. You don’t need to “show” me or anyone on the forum “for me to come clean” about who I really am. That “thinking” is a scared, fearful motivation within you Ines… it is not loving toward me at all. That expectation of illusory perfection is not yielding to my energy or is soulfully brave toward me or looking in on yourself. That wanting of me to come clean is an illusion in your thinking, a quelled fear–> forcing and manipulating a game in place, not felt in integrity, but simply to serve your insecurity. You have to learn objectively of your deep catalyst role and cause of your motivations in relating which are not held accountable in your heart. Your head follows the fear overwhelming in your heart.
Have you ever asked yourself the question; Who am I ? I do each breath and I do every word and deed delivered now (not always in my past)… Once you find some solidarity in your-self, in reasonable depth and integrity, we can easily engage in your ideal of –> “normal”. But you see I don’t foresee normalcy with you. 1) I’m not normal. 2) You can’t understand my differences, my desire, my nature as an intense, deep, complex man, if you are not in tune “with who you are” on soulful, loving, fearless levels…which comes back to the huge earlier question about— Who am I ? In Total Truth.
In fairness to you: Not many humans were designed (born) to know those specific deeper answers or to confront the challenge of Truth of who they are.. reflected in their psyche.
“..There are questions I wanted to ask you. About you. But that means dragging out some… stuff out of you, and I don’t want to make it harder than it is already. In real life it happens naturally. So I am not going to. Let’s stop here. I am going to leave..”
“You don’t want to make it harder than it already is”??
I have soulfully said I would happily answer ANY questions you want to ask me. I have always hoped for love in our communication. The reality though, is you are attempting to play another game Ines from that thinking in your paragraph. This is the most comfortable I have felt, with you specifically. How?
1) Being the core of me is easy and comfortable in general. 2) However “Being” the superficiality of others personalities for the sake of being “liked” is truly very uncomfortable with me and for my conscience.
You darling, are the one struggling for soulful answers. Manipulative tools to control do not seek love. They seek comfort of the ego illusion. The ego only knows controlling mechanisms to survive in this dysfunctional world and feel “comfortable with IT’S PLACE IN THE SUPERFICIAL WORLD”… while in Hades world, he feels that “comfort” in others as the gigantic lie one has become in themselves and actually believes as real, and as honest in themselves.
Whereas Hades/Mars feels the reality of personality as NOT DYING. Which is who Hades/Mars is—> Death of the personality—> To merge Soul (God) with the surface “reality” of personality.
Not related directly to the above, but part of following from it I suppose…
Is it a child like state of relating to and engaging with the world? IN THE TRUTH as is experienced? Remember the story ‘The Emperor’s New Clothes’? The King is naked?
How on earth one does that when one has been railroaded by the accepted ‘norms’ of relating, conduct, behaviour, beliefs etc. etc.?
For God’s sake, Ness… OUT!
Great questions:
“..Is it a child like state of relating to and engaging with the world?”
Yes. The hope, faith, desire, optimism in-self and goodwill to accept and learn from the animal in man, no matter how ugly or cruel or selfish, but from experiencing environments, not be influenced by the immense fear in man. Women are different however. I’m talking about the ancient feminine energy all women are. Women at the core will offer any person love and nurturing, they will not act in aggression or abusive plans on many levels or violence IF THEY SEE and FEEL the good (the God) in a person reflected back at them… which encourages in their Yin instincts safe energies for them which they can trust, coming from a person, or men in general.
“..IN THE TRUTH as is experienced? Remember the story ‘The Emperor’s New Clothes’? The King is naked?..”
Yes, hahaha. You could use that correlation as a symbol for the energy of Truth. But honestly… I really don’t know the Emperor’s capacity to love humanity, past himself, and to love fearlessly through soul and reaching empathy. Most emperor’s that I perceive are channels “of love and truth” through their “title” which means their “public image” in the hollow reality of egotism. His “nakedness” would have much to do with his relationship with Hades and Apollo simultaneously. Not solely his infatuations with his inner King – Apollo.
” How on earth one does that when one has been railroaded by the accepted ‘norms’ of relating, conduct, behaviour, beliefs etc. etc.?”
Well, I’ve described my journey in detail here before. And that was something divine happened to me through pain, sorrow and dark empty years of confusion. It wasn’t until I started seeking answers, through reading meta-physical, occult related books that I could connect my suffering and struggle with a higher meaning. A higher purpose. A deeper and wonderfully felt existence. That existence reminded me I was not alone in despair. There were billions on this path. I just happened to be blessed for the Source of the Universe to speak to me. So slowed down, quieted the mind, settled the heart, and just noticed myself breathing. I noticed my ego as a separate entity away from powerful spiritual energy flowing through me and around me. Soon after, I realized I could see and feel this same magnificent flow amid all humans… happening on all levels of evolutionary stages… witnessed in their thinking, their acts, their desires and the why’s behind why they didn’t desire and seek what they are really after.
That’s a summary Ines.
I didn’t mean the Emperor 🙂 I meant THE CHILD who saw past the Emperor’s ‘image’ of himself in his own head to what it really was – no clothes. Innocently.
“So slowed down, quieted the mind, settled the heart, and just noticed myself breathing. I noticed my ego as a separate entity away from powerful spiritual energy flowing through me and around me.”
I have to learn that yet. Next step I suppose.
Pluto, I want to ask you something, it relates to the last paragraph of your post about your journey. But before I do…
I have 52% of my chart in water, but 35% in Earth. I guess that always prompts me to apply everything in some form of real life situation, to ground it in here and now, in tangible. So…
Do you REALLY take this awareness into the real world?
Is this the ONLY way you conduct yourself out there?
Wouldn’t that create massive problems EVERYWHERE you go?
DOES it create those problems?
How then do you RECONCILE your conduct with the necessity to SURVIVE?
That last one is important, because hey, we do need to survive. Imagine all those mugs (British = fool) in any real environment – office, construction, hospital, shop etc. etc. Imagine talking to them as is. Imagine how they don’t get it. Imagine how they obstruct subconscoiusly what you are trying to achieve (could be something as innocent as discussing a business report).
These are genuine questions. I believe to consciously take yourself out there in the manner you are speaking of here – is bravery beyond. I know you don’t think of it like that, but forgive me, I am my watery/earthly self here.
Thank you.
“Do you REALLY take this awareness into the real world?”
Well yes. My existence is with me wherever I am physically. The thing is I am really restricted to be this awareness among conformed societal groups and gatherings and on dates, which is basically everyone, LoL. I speak my mind out there… no doubt… but people have learned about my lets’ say “difference” to this level, as you guys on the forum have experienced.
“Is this the ONLY way you conduct yourself out there?”
No. I conduct myself according to the energy I am presented with (in people). So daggers of integrity and passion and loyalty and love and care for others is how people understand my character, proven through my conduct. Nobody really knows my reservoir of goodies within. You guys here have been victims of those goodies. Hahaha.
“..Wouldn’t that create massive problems EVERYWHERE you go?
DOES it create those problems?..”
No, not really. Remember my nature is mutable and receptive of what energy is felt and laser-beamed. My nature becomes cardinal and fixed on a person or subject or motivation when I feel darkness and deceit wanting control of the Truth. The “Light” available in me now, has the arsenal to excavate buried issues of any particular problem, negative energy or lie in people. My probing and investigative resources are a natural weapon for digging up such treasure.
Do you want to know HOW massive problems would or could manifest everywhere I go?
I would encounter huge unhappiness in my heart and conscience awareness if I was not given another gift called — DISCERNMENT. So without discerning the most subtle and powerful energies in human beings, I would be “unable” to control and direct my mind energy. I would not understand the intelligence in my heart. My ego would just be throwing grenades and missiles everywhere at life anywhere I happened to fear. I would, in that non-discerning reality be blowing myself up and destroying the love potential everywhere I talk and be with people. I would literally “create” my own private hell to feed an insatiable ego hunger which would keep “looking for soul outward” while not magnetizing the soul power and “total ego” by seeking inward.
Luckily for me, I know my interior better than anyone, so I can be my own council according to many received energies in me and in all human beings. I have lived life FEELING EVERYTHING THERE IS TO FEEL Ines. If I did not feel the lowest of destructive lows and the highest of orgasmic highs… I WOULD still be limited with my understanding of fear, the fear of the unknown and the fear present in me naturally… which I learned is as natural as the powerful love energy present in me. Love and Fear is not separated by anything genius. Love and Fear in human beings is separated by?… Yep— The energy of Truth.
I honestly believe anybody who writes what I write and thinks as I do — are not normal in society.
I’ve seen “normal” folks. That’s right. Because normal is SEEN.
I do apologize to the many people who might be bored or exhausted by my involvement on this website. Perhaps this forum was supposed to contain something different, something more fun, sexy or casual without me in the middle.
Sorry;)
and thats a wrap! piggy in the middle!spank!
“Women at the core will offer any person love and nurturing, they will not act in aggression or abusive plans on many levels or violence IF THEY SEE and FEEL the good (the God) in a person reflected back at them… which encourages in their Yin instincts safe energies for them which they can trust, coming from a person, or men in general.”
No…a woman who is truly in touch with her energies, will offer love, even in the face of dispair, insecurity,
and not feeling safe, because the connection to LOVE / God is STRONGER than the lies…or illusion. i.e. What is above, is stronger than what is below…Or…Hades is stronger than…this.
My experiences have also taught me that when shit hits the fan, I can either fall out of tune to my own heart energies, or I can stay in them. Therefore, a man dominating or abusing, seems so distant and far away. It does not exist. The only thing that exists, is if I remained in tune with me…because I sure as hell am not going to be in tune with what is currently out there. It feels like it is constantly “raping” me. It is death and devastation, for the reasons that you have mentioned.
We just don´t listen to our inner guidance, that is all.
Scorpio instinctively perceive when “woman” is not in tune with these energies…and they will “plutonically mars” it out of you…that could be why you see that women are “weak imitations” of the feminine energies that you have access to.
Women, in general, be missin´ the warrior. Or…what it takes for them to “balance” the fact that “Women then do not help their own plight, because of crippling fears embedded and dominated by the conformed reality of man’s world.” You know what happens when feminine energies are mixed with mars, IN TRUTH and love.
“..No…a woman who is truly in touch with her energies, will offer love, even in the face of dispair, insecurity,…”
Yes sweetness.- But how many women are truly in touch with her energies? LoL!
You’re the big cuddly Lion exception.
Hi P.Puppy,
I would say “not many”!
Or rather, not many actually have strived to perfect themselves in this state…
But during my time here in Latin America, it has permitted me to truly identify what is worth fighting for…and let the illusions fall away back into the ocean, via pain and connection to the divine, where they belong.
Us dipping into the abyss (which is highly insecure and feels very “out of our comfort zone), without being in a state of love, means we pick up and become attached to our illusions. But the truth of it is, it feels intrinsically in me, like these energetic attachments, must all go back…because we have “taken” through attachment, what should not have been taken (detachment)….
Had we been in a state of love, we would have known better.
Am I making sense?
“I just happened to be blessed for the Source of the Universe to speak to me.”
Pluto, do you remember how it happened exactly?
Was it a Eureka moment, as in sudden and powerful?
Was it something specific that triggered it AFTER you went through a conscious effort of:” I started seeking answers, through reading meta-physical, occult related books that I could connect my suffering and struggle with a higher meaning.”?
The reason why I am asking…
I am moving closer to understanding ONLY because I am now able to relate my life experiences to what we are talking about here. So… Inner peace… I remember my childlike state back then. Parts of it are still alive. They are manifested through me being… trusting, a lot of the time. Pisceans are, naturally, you probably know that.
However, this is me NOW, with all the self imposed limitations TAKEN from the world NORM without me even being aware (or wasn’t until now). Hahaha, no, you are NOT normal in THAT sense, but I didn’t mean it in that sense either.
Anyway… I have not looked into the gun barrel, literally, like Gatubela. The closest I can think of is when I had an anaphylactic shock (through the bloody medical establishment procedures, of all places) and went from me to near dead in one minute flat. Total suspension of reality. Slow motion. Fear in people’s faces around. Me thinking ‘Hurry up, I am going’. No emotions whatsoever, just BEING in that.
BUT. It didn’t give me any sense of DIVINE. Maybe because I wasn’t seeking then. Hence – my question.
Gatubela, your input would be appreciated too. I am seeking for the crossover point.
Thanks, guys
Hi Ines,
I asked for “ego death” because I saw the damage I could do. Hell, the universe took it damn literally and seriously. But I supposed that it was because I was bloody serious about it. I have found out that I also have my mars in leo, in the eighth house, my sun in leo, in the eigth house, and my mercury in leo, in the eigth house. I am not really an expert in astrology, but when I was told that, I guess it explained alot about how I was able to “kill” myself. I just channelled all of those “eighth houses” into one precise moment…
I can be a serious bunny!
I began to feel it so intensely, as if I was hurting my own soul. That is why I take everything personally. It seems selfish but it really is not. I go through the potential pain that my own actions can inflict before actually “doing” them.
It brought me to my knees, as if everything I did to others, I was also doing to myself.
In terms of looking at that barrel…
Well, that is something completely different. You did not seek love, therefore, you did not receive it either. Ask, and you shall recieve.
Gatubela,
Were you at the point that you could…….. murder someone?
“I go through the potential pain that my own actions can inflict before actually “doing” them.
It brought me to my knees, as if everything I did to others, I was also doing to myself.”
Wow…. No shit. i don’t even have words for this one.
“..Pluto, do you remember how it happened exactly?
Was it a Eureka moment, as in sudden and powerful?
Was it something specific that triggered it AFTER you went through a conscious effort of:” I started seeking answers, through reading meta-physical, occult related books that I could connect my suffering and struggle with a higher meaning.”?
One word – Catharsis.
If you were given the emotional and psychological range and capacity to completely surrender your ego-illusions to the Source, you would ‘know how to’ – Cry. You would know how to – Release… the disease of conjured myth. You would FEEL transformation happening in your heart and psyche. You would see that the manifestation of pain and suffering is/has indeed bringing you in closer with the realness FELT (experienced) in your soul (God).
So if you think “you’re too tough to cry”… this “reality” means you are not EXPERIENCING YOURSELF through the heart and feeling of your life. This means your ego is dominating your reality. Which means a separate entity you have created AND BELIEVE IN… TO BE REAL… dominates your inner FEARS of any troubling or difficult SELF-EXPERIENCE.
What I have just shared there is not the exception in humanity with the billions of baby souls, like yourself. That reality is the rule for most. Seeking greatness or richness within the core of ones own life is very rare. So, old…. ancient souls have lived and died, lived and died, lived and died… over and over, in more than one physical body, over hundreds or thousands of years. I am a believer that soul (eternity) re-incarnates into another physical body after the passing of our current physical body.
Our physical body, is literally “just a vehicle” or “just a vessel” which carries the eternal greatness of the experience of soul (God) into another body after death… and so on and so on.
People who have projected mental constitutions to see their “experiences” outward in their life… are the definition of “baby souls”.
You see Ines… The Inner always equals the Outer. And what is seen and believed in the Outer, always equals the truth of the Inner.
So when people are living (manifesting) the creations of their believed ego-myths… these very young souls are essentially living almost 100% through their OUTER only. The Inner… to those babies – IS UNKNOWN.
So we come full circle again, in that if we were not born to experience THE DEPTH AND TOTALITY of a rich Inner life, we are born to accept and participate the illusions (separation from God) thanks to the creations of ego entities – the Outer. These people are not ordained in their respective physical life, in this stage of this body, so they were not born TO DEAL with a rich inner, transforming experience – via Death and Rebirth. Because they are babies.
I can tell you now. Baby souls don’t write what I’ve been writing.
The Inner defines the Outer remember?
You are some kind of guardian angel… I come home from a business meeting, and my heart HURTS so much I want to rip it out. And here is the post of yours…
Physical pain is short lived. It can be controlled with drugs. It ends. Heartache…. can go on forever, and NOTHING removes it. For me anyway…
Oh I do cry… Crying is not a weakness to me. But there is no RELEASE. The disease of conjured myth… Yep.
Let me FEEL it. I need to find a way of letting go… My inner life is… TOO rich. Toxic. It poisons with traps of NON-REALITY. It tricks me into believing what is not there. It whispers lies to me. So… no release.
I feel so low… again.
THANK you
Would you say that ‘ego’ is about ‘What am I?’ Those separate entities you are talking about above? Which are rooted in and born out of The Outer life?
Do you believe children have no ‘ego’? Up to around 12, because after they reach that age – they are not really children anymore.
Can a feeling of love for someone be the result of ‘ego’ creation? And hence – not love at all?
I have never reached a state of catharsis. But I have experienced a state of bliss – a very short one, lasting no more than a couple of minutes. It was PURE. There wasn’t any reason or cause whatsoever to be in that state. It happened by itself. And it was, well… bliss.
“…Do you believe children have no ‘ego’? Up to around 12, because after they reach that age – they are not really children anymore…”
Hahaha. No. I’ve seen many 67 year old “children” throughout my life. Some 87 too.
The time of ego influencing a human being, depends on their soul age and soul path in prior physical lifetimes. We could say ego is… the attachments of ones imagination believed in the outside world… Ones tangible dreams.
The 12 years was my earlier reference of how I would be as a father and the choices I would offer the kid, by going easy on the child, in terms of not enforcing or molding or influencing that child into a by-product or the cookie cutter of me. I would not want that for the kid. Many parents subconsciously raise their children with their own interests and expectations implemented through the child, while ignoring the unique divinity of the child, and experiencing the soul that baby actually is in mind and heart. I would, together with a fine woman let the child find (receive) their “own mind” through infancy until puberty. To me, dogmatic, rigid and fearful lifelong subconscious influences and psychological conditioning from the parents or guardians, are vicariously learned by the child. The child then believes the reality of the parents as the only reality. Monkey see, monkey be.
The question is not about “they are not children anymore”. I never said that. In fact, baby souls “are children” their whole lives, til their physical death.
Every baby born into this world cannot avoid the attachments of ego. Ego is there for spiritual lessons to keep the longing of the soul energy/love energy constant… and not by appointment only. Ego is, in a spiritual context, there for us to survive and thrive daily, such as working hard, feeding ourselves and family, procreating for more feeding, sheltering ourselves to feed in warmth and safety, socializing and playing also with intentions of feeding ourselves. Ego is needed for those physical existential necessities to “get ahead” so everyone can adore us, LoL…. again so we can survive each day “and succeed” in the eyes of those “who made it”. LoL.
So we all NEED ego, because we are simply in a physical body grazing, humping, and poohing, birthing like cows in the meadow. Ego is the evil AND LIMITATION we all need as a consequence of our deeds and physical mortality.
Finding the soul and the unknown is another journey all together from the tangible one described. Finding the soul is a path of consciousness… or connecting the personality to higher meaning, the meaning discovered through pain, loss, self-deceit, suffering and denial. The soul during those experiences is yearning for the ego to dissolve and remove itself from those “beliefs”. The soul wants to kill the personality, transforming the mind and heart in wholeness with the Universal power. When the soul wins, dating, courting, wooing and divorcing the initial wooer, that life long desire “finding my other half”… are realized as hysterical embarrassments.
We are human, you are right. But we can be better humans. Most people are doing the best they can.
That is why I asked you the first question ‘Would you say that ‘ego’ is about ‘What am I?’ Those separate entities you are talking about above? Which are rooted in and born out of The Outer life?’
‘Ego’ is usually understood as a conscious awareness of one’s SELF, as a separate entity from others. And that doesn’t arrive up unitl around 11-12. But you understand it differently. And I am still struggling with it.
My son wants to be a particle physicist. It is different from quantum mechanics which deals with matter and energy. It is about THE BUILDING BLOCKS at the core. When he was seven he had a revelation while waiting for a school bus. He looked up into the sky and down at the ground and thought ‘I want to know what all this is made of. How it was made.’ He never wavered since. So you can imagine… In our little household we have some SERIOUS discussions about the totality of life.
I did go easy on him. We have an expression ‘He is FREE RANGE’ Meaning ‘roam free’, like an organic chicken in the lush field LOL. He never abused that. He is Pisces with Scorpio Rising. He’ll get there.
“To me, dogmatic, rigid and fearful lifelong subconscious influences and psychological conditioning from the parents or guardians, are vicariously learned by the child.” – wait till they start school… It gets worse, you have no idea… We had it first hand.
Thank you.
Hi Ines,
Hmmmm…
No never murder someone. That is pre-meditated cold bloodedness. I will leave that classification on my ex.
Sorry, Gatubela, I didn’t mean to pry.
I guess when one is pushed and pushed and pushed…. I didn’t have any love in me at that point. So you reach what they call ‘a state of affect’, so it doesn’t have to be premeditated. We don’t have guns here. Frying pans will do. No, I didn’t murder anyone. But I remember that state of affect. A millimetre from stepping over the line.
So my ‘wow’ is to you for…’hurting your own soul’.
Hi Ines,
“So my ‘wow’ is to you for…’hurting your own soul’.”
Yeah…do you know how many soulful ass whoppings I have gotten? LoL! It smarts!!!
“Not many humans were designed (born) to know those specific deeper answers or to confront the challenge of Truth of who they are.. reflected in their psyche.”
—–
Why is that? Why do you think some of us were made in certain ways? I am trying to understand.
Because little one, our nature and soul are destined for a specific direction. That direction goes beyond logical choosing in the tangible world. Also…. I could die in 38 days. You could pass away in 38 years. Much of what humans “think” they understand is relative to their comforting illusions in the material world. Comfort through that created illusion means one doesn’t have to face the reality of death (which I’ve explained to death) and confront the inner responsibility of pain or fear. People need to be in touch with energy of fear to experience the virtues riddled within it. Those two things- pain and fear, are avoided in humans reality like smelly rotten underwear.
Hmm. What is the specific direction destined for people who relish living in superficiality? Are they living like this because they have not questioned…because they have not confronted…because they have not tried to connect? Is their soul’s destiny what they are are living like now (and for the rest of their life) or was it always to connect with the Divine?
What are yours views on destiny, fate, and free will? Are they separate entities or One?
It would take me a week to scroll through and read all these comments…. I am responding to the first hundred or so.
If the guy you like or are dating, decides to up and vanish once in awhile without telling you, then clearly he does not care for you. Scorpio or any other sign.
I know there has always been a lot of controversy about the scorpio sign but, it’s really not hard to figure it out, no matter what sign a man is.
He talks to you when he is bored. That’s why you get ignored when he has better things to do. Sure he will flatter you but, in reality, he does not care.
Just move on, I’m sure you will find someone great.
Maybe there are other opinions already saying the same but, I have not read far enough into the comments. So here’s my two cents…
Believe me, if a man loves you, he will never just vanish and “need his space” without telling/asking you first. He will most probably only NEED space, once you share a place (like saying “the basement is mine, okay?”). Scorpio or any other sign.
You are getting played while he looks for something better. You are his “back-up plan”
Do yourself a favor and tell him to piss off next time u randomly hear from him for a booty call or anything.
I am November 13 male.
Hope you stop yourself from getting played. Good luck.
p.s. This is only my opinion and in no way reflects anyone other than myself. But hey what do I really know anyway.
Ahh Nov 14 male. my bad
DJ,
hehe. you forgot your birthday..
thanks for your honesty.
hmmm…why are you trying to stop people from “getting played” when its what you do.? hmm??
it was a typing mistake. 🙂
“But hey what do I really know anyway.”
Read ALL of it. It gets progressively more in depth as you go along. You will know.
Hi D.J.
““the basement is mine, okay?”
I am not so sure…but it seems that the basement was already “nested”…
way before scorpio asks this one….especially if you used “the look”.
Strangely, scorpio has a way of imprinting time and space and …things…
whatever
“What do you want!”…Male Scorpio schooling Female Scorpio.
mm.. i love that scene
Hmmmm….I watched it a couple of times….
What stood out was that she was “bored” and “insecure”….and that he would “hate” her if she walked away.
Very scorpionic indeed…especially in his analysis of her and her burst of “Its not so simple”…
You are right…it would be very nice to be asked that question.
Ummm…her silence in this golden opportunity that MAN gives his WOMAN… was very funny.
Some women would have taken out the “list”… You could tell that the question was not related to anything materialistic. It was soulful.
Beautiful.
He-he… Pluto, you must have had a few of those. At least he is TALKING. ASKING. Most don’t. And that may be a problem in itself.
… at least 7 of those on here and 77 in the outside world, hahaha.
“..Most don’t. And that may be a problem in itself..”
Precisely.
He’s talking because he knows what he wants. That is the evolved manifestation right there. Much of what I’ve conflicted about with women here was a demonstration that you all don’t know what you want… when the fear sets in. The fear of real love.
Have lost in love. Imagine how that strengthens a man who “knows”.;)
“Have lost in love. Imagine how that strengthens a man who “knows”
Lost in Love? Is this possible? (hmmmm…feeling those eagle eyes looking)
Loosing in love, permits one to “detect” its presence or its absence.
If there is NO love, every interaction and love making, will be a lie/ illusion and the relationship will “fail”.. and not be eternal. Meaning…women and men become the epitome of cold blooded, blissful, unaware soulessness.
Maybe those are harsh words…but if understanding what it means to be in love…with yourself and with that special person, means not being able to to permit the relationship to progress further in anything less than sacred…as felt resonating in your own inner energies, divinity, integrity and virtue.
It feels as if you are betraying yourself.
So, I guess that explains the constant “fighting” in that movie clip you posted.
“Have lost in love. Imagine how that strengthens a man who “knows”..”
“..Lost in Love? Is this possible? (hmmmm…feeling those eagle eyes looking).”
Of course it’s possible when the woman is a little brat master 24/7.
Gatubela… I have not been “like this” since I rode my first tricycle. It’s taken years of healthy hell EXPERIENCE and occult knowledge to reach this state I give to you now.
Losing in love means to me, that women have not wanted, but feared the unknown and more goodies of me and the relationship itself. Obviously you haven’t dated a stunning 28 yr old brattyass! LoL
So I have lost in that sense, due to their Persephone muddles. My Eagle goodies in relation to her frivolous physical goodies = not a match made in Hades heaven.:)
Love paradoxes.
Pluto, you are not too keen on ‘cracking open’ an unevolved male Scorpio on here, huh… Why is that, darling?
Hmmm….I seemed to have misunderstood D.J.´s post as compared to you and Umm…
I perceived it as if he was trying to offer advice…
Giving is giving…so why did you classify the guy as unevolved, without asking him or talking to him first?
.
I don’t understand that question?
OK, you know when one of us ladies posts something on here which contradicts your inner core? You feel you need to respond? To correct those imbalances?
DJ posted above clearly is one of those. ‘you are his back up plan’ he-he… he plays.
You let it be. Why?
Ines…
In spanish we have a saying…the word is “carbonera”..
It is a woman, who adds more carbon to the fire…in order to make it burn higher.
So…why sweetly start a conflict?
Instead, I feel that it would be great if P.Puppy and D.J. could stick around, and share, as they have been doing.
So…P.Puppy and D.J…stick around…its nice to have you eagles flying around the forum.
Why would I want to tell a male how to be with women? If they don’t ask?
Why would I contribute anything if I know they’re not interested in seeking?
Be careful with your next post. I feel your insidious naivety again.
You know, when I posted the first time on here – I wasn’t asking. I wasn’t sure what to ask. I wasn’t even sure if I was seeking any answers. You took me there.
Something in your answer doesn’t feel right.
Answer me. That reply is not an answer. I don’t accept fog and haze as honesty, sincere and real. It is plain aversion from yourself.
So don’t politicize more insidious energy to everyone that I am the one who conceals. When you would not be typing anything here with me in the first place.
Answer.;)
Hmmm.. I didn’t realise you were ASKING me those questions, I thought they were hypothetical ones… you know like ‘Why would I want to have a coffee at midnight?’ meaning ‘No, I don’t because it’s that late.’
I can’t answer those, you are asking about yourself, how would I know? But maybe…
“Why would I want to tell a male how to be with women? If they don’t ask? – Maybe because males are just as confused? And why not tell even when they don’t ask? As I said I didn’t ask to start with, and you still told me, huh
Why would I contribute anything if I know they’re not interested in seeking?” – How do you KNOW they are not interested?
You are free to walk into the sunset any time. I will feel the loss. But hey…
OK, there might be a different male/male dynamic, but then there would also be a different way of relating to each other? Not in the same way you talk to women.
Please stop writing into questions more than there is.
Just to make it clearer, or else you will say I haven’t answered…
“Why would I contribute anything if I know they’re not interested in seeking?” – You wouldn’t want to contribute if they are not interested in seeking, but how do you KNOW they are not interested?
Sigh………………………………………………………………………………………
“..You wouldn’t want to contribute if they are not interested in seeking, but how do you KNOW they are not interested?..”
They did not ask me directly in the present. That’s why.
You had understood prior, when I showed the movie clip, that evolved asks, listens, probes, feels intensely and responds powerfully FOR THE FLAMING TRUTH.
Evolved does not run from that energy. Because evolved doesn’t fear the energy presented or the fears of “what everyone may think”.
You run from the Truth Ines. You always have. So what does YOUR RUNNING have anything to do with un-evolved males being who they are, which is passive and commenting from the sidelines? What does that quietness… meaning what does that reality of NOT ASKING OR WANTING TRUTHFUL ENERGY in the present moment…. have anything to do with my eternity?!
I am eternity. I am death. I am the unknown. So in a way you are right. You couldn’t possibly know everything about my universe, which is why you intuit me as concealing and hidden. YES, from that angle you are right, I am hidden — from the illusions of (normal) personality.
I am very private BY NATURE, meaning my specific/innate soul design. But the funny paradox is… I am giving who I am on different levels among all of you here…. which is not so private. Hahaha.
Peace;)
“..Please stop writing into questions more than there is..”
There is always more. There is always choice. To stop or to hide, is to fail and suppress ones soul potential, which equates to being human. The being of human you are now.;)
“To stop or to hide, is to fail and suppress ones soul potential, which equates to being human.”
Hi P.Puppy,
How do you see soul potential? I got confused a bit, because i just feel like a cuddly lioness…
“..Please stop writing into questions more than there is..”
There is always more. There is always choice. To stop or to hide, is to fail and suppress ones soul potential, which equates to being human. The being of human you are now.;)
And you want to know what that MORE is. You to a ‘t’;)
I accept.
Ines,
” I wasn’t asking…”
Ummm…no…while sharing your roller coaster experiences, you were describing your search for scorpionic potential for greatness, and wanting justification from them about “adding the darkness”…….under an atheist believe in divinity…if i remember correctly.
“What does that quietness… meaning what does that reality of NOT ASKING OR WANTING TRUTHFUL ENERGY in the present moment…. have anything to do with my eternity?!”
Hi again P.Puppy,
Is truthful energy supposed to resonate through a woman´s inner energies? Or rather, she also surrenders to the truth of her energies?
How is truthful energy? I have not felt it…can you describe it?
“hmmm…why are you trying to stop people from “getting played” when its what you do.? hmm??”
I do not play anyone for a fool.
Some do, the sign does not matter.
Everyone can have their judgement clouded by “love” and get “played”
Just trying to give some honest advice. Take it or leave it 🙂
“Everyone can have their judgement clouded by “love” and get “played”
That concisely sums up most of 1340 odd posts on here. I really appreciate the inverted commas around those two words. Honestly.
Cheers
Dj,
fool huh? hmm..
yes the power of those clouds..can get so glarey without them.hehe.
“Everyone can have their judgement clouded by “love” and get “played””
Hi D.J.,
I did not understand this comment as easily as my fellow forum buddies.
Judgement clouded by love does not get played…at least not for me.
A girl has surrendered to something beyond herself, most likely her man´s higher self / soul, through the divine, if she truly loves…
What did I not not understand?
No, something with your true Intent is not “right” — again.
If you can’t understand my two very clear questions, that’s your issue.
If you want your blind ego-self fed, ask the male in question directly as to what he thinks.
Peace. Out.:)
DJ… I was responding to Ines.
Regards in your endeavors brother;)
I was responding to “umm”
lol
You are right – there was no loving intent there. There was an intent asking to REVEAL.Different to SHARE. And every time this happens, your intent in return is – wanting to CONCEAL. This is always the kind of dynamic with you here, not just between me and you. The message is ‘Do not pry. Or you will get hurt’. I am learning so much…. And we still don’t trust each other completely. Oh Pluto…
Not relating to the above…
How does one let go of an attachment to another? A long standing one?
OK, I need to look into Buddhism. Seriously. A way of life rather than religion.
Learn about yourself first, and stop being a manipulative hypocrite.
“..There was an intent asking to REVEAL.Different to SHARE. And every time this happens, your intent in return is – wanting to CONCEAL…”
You have no clue, NO CLUE, what your’e talking about. Just more bullshit.
If I have “concealed” and “not revealed” anything of value Einstein… how come you had admitted to everyone —- ” I am learning so much”. ??
Answer my questions if you “think” your intent is wholesome and true.
Start with the two direct questions I asked you on 1341, and this one.
If you can’t answer me, that’s fine. You know I’m walking into the sunset.
And every time this happens, your intent in return is – wanting to CONCEAL.
Hahaha!
You need to take “how to read the Abyss” lessons!!!
Not fer the faint of heart Dearie. Only the pure and the strong make it.
Hi Ines,
“How does one let go of an attachment to another? A long standing one?”
By truly loving them, in awareness and unconditionally, feeling your own inner energies and surrendering only to his higher self through the Divine.
Plutonic energies will tolerate nothing less than giving your all…and loving, as you truly do. The rest is a lie. You don´t want to know how it is to be a liar and walk through those plutonic gates…
We attach ourselves to what is not ours for the taking. We are that arrogant as a society, to not know how to deal with these attachments issues with love, gratitude and humility.
“OK, I need to look into Buddhism. Seriously. A way of life rather than religion.”
I understand that this religion is very beautiful…Here in Chile it is practiced, but it is not easy to arrive to the centers. They are usually in the more wealther places in the city.
Don´t you feel that you should TRULY feel something inside, instead of generally look for positive feedback from others?
I am sure that even the Buddha, in his divine state, would want sincerity…
I hope you don´t use that line, while facing your soulful energies.
Ines, your question asked on 1331 which is a long worm, I’ll answer it here.
“…That is why I asked you the first question ‘Would you say that ‘ego’ is about ‘What am I?’ Those separate entities you are talking about above? Which are rooted in and born out of The Outer life?’”
OK, From what I see and feel in your reality, yes almost 100% of your thinking is a result of the INFLUENCE of the collective mind. Your thinking is the by-product of what was taught to you throughout life this far, be it through educational institutions, be it through media assimilation (which is another institution), be it through social peer pressure from family members and friends, which is the vicarious pressure to conform you into their defined reality— that was/is the accepted and believed known of their separate or segregated behavior, segregated opinions and projections, their attachment to vicarious materialistic beliefs, their atheistic limitations, their lack of feeling-knowledge in their stifled communication attempts, their inherited values principles, absorbed and passed down to you and others from earlier ancestry fears and rules.
So…the creation of ego manifest through our many colorful cultures, which are then believed (meaning they create “a belief”) yes believed through your known understanding (experience) as real and as fair and as loving by people in the general world. = Normalcy known among the flock = Seen known among the herd = Non questioned and accepted known among the tribe = Non penetrated known among the comfort of baaaahh!… So if one in the flock soothingly accepts the comforts, yes the comfortable illusions of — “this is all there is!!” (in life) thinking by looking outward… then that person is a wooly participant of the collective, conformed mind/heart. Breaking free of that reality is too risky for a little lamb, yes even “a black sheep”… because a lamb is not “a predator by nature” (as the Eagle is) and so that lamb has the soul path, a path not given like that of a warrior (as the Eagle) so that little follower/conformed fluffy sheep is — A WORRIER… by it’s very nature LoL.. To worry (mental noise, heart dead projection) is to actually fear the unknown. The predictable is very soothing for the baaaahs, because they know where the tastiest grass is over the hill. So, to fear each day because of the oppression instilled in sheep to conform by a million other sheep, is to not break free (in fearless consciousness) out of the cocoon of ones ultra comfortable self-induced illusion.
There have been glimpses. in you, of you entering my unknowns, via your Pisces mystical potential to see the Universe within an Individual. You have only become a seer of my unknown (or soul) because I have invited you there and I have shown you that there is indeed, “more”… in a spiritual context.
I do understand, Pluto, thank you, you don’t have to repeat anymore. But understanding is not enough. I want to BE. I don’t know HOW. There are no ‘tools’. Or at least I don’t know of them. I may never be so.
hehe like a song.. “yo DJ you ready for the flock?”
“I wanna hear you say Baaaaaah! Baaaaaah! Baaaaah! all the woolies in the house say Baaaaah! Baaaaah Baaaaaah” ..
hahaha! ¡¡¡Que perfecto!!!
Baaaaaah! Baaaaaah! Baaaaaah! 🙂
Here… in layman terms.Sums up a lot of what was talked about here. Except it doesn’t say HOW to do that. I am so tired…. Baaaaaah.
“Experiencing Without Attachment
Accept the moment for what it is. Don’t try to turn it into yesterday; that moment’s gone. Don’t plot about how you can make the moment last forever. Just seep into the moment and enjoy it because it will eventually pass. Nothing is permanent. Fighting that reality will only cause you pain.
Believe now is enough. It’s true—tomorrow may not look the same as today, no matter how much you try to control it. A relationship might end. You might have to move. You’ll deal with those moments when they come. All you need right now is to appreciate and enjoy what you have. It’s enough.
Call yourself out. Learn what it looks like to grasp at people, things, or circumstances so you can redirect your thoughts when they veer toward attachment. When you dwell on keeping, controlling, manipulating, or losing something instead of simply experiencing it.
Define yourself in fluid terms. We are all constantly evolving and growing. Define yourself in terms that can withstand change. Defining yourself by possessions, roles, and relationships breeds attachment because loss entails losing not just what you have, but also who you are.
Enjoy now fully. No matter how much time you have in an experience or with someone you love, it will never feel like enough. So don’t think about it in terms of quantity—aim for quality, instead. Attach to the idea of living well moment-to-moment. That’s an attachment that can do you no harm.
Letting Go of Attachment to People
Friend yourself. It will be harder to let people go when necessary if you depend on them for your sense of worth. Believe you’re worthy whether someone else tells you or not. This way, you relate to people—not just how they make you feel about yourself.
Go it alone sometimes. Take time to foster your own interests, ones that nothing and no one can take away. Don’t let them hinge on anyone or anything other than your values and passion.
Hold lightly. This one isn’t just about releasing attachments—it’s also about maintaining healthy relationships. Contrary to romantic notions, you are not someone’s other half. You’re separate and whole. You can still hold someone to close to your heart; just remember, if you squeeze too tightly, you’ll both be suffocated.
Interact with lots of people. If you limit yourself to one or two relationships they will seem like your lifelines. Everyone needs people, and there are billions on the planet. Stay open to new connections. Accept the possibility your future involves a lot of love whether you cling to a select few people or not.
Justify less. I can’t let him go—I’ll be miserable without him. I’d die if I lost her—she’s all that I have. These thoughts reinforce beliefs that are not fact, even if they feel like it. The only way to let go and feel less pain is to believe you’re strong enough to carry on if and when things change.
Letting Go of Attachment to the Past
Know you can’t change the past. Even if you think about over and over again. Even if you punish yourself. Even if you refuse to accept it. It’s done. The only way to relieve your pain about what happened is to give yourself relief. No one and nothing else can create peace in your head for you.
Love instead of fearing. When you hold onto the past, it often has to do with fear: fear you messed up your chance at happiness, or fear you’ll never know such happiness again. Focus on what you love and you’ll create happiness instead of worrying about it.
Make now count. Instead of thinking of what you did or didn’t do, the type of person you were or weren’t, do something worthwhile now. Be someone worthwhile now. Take a class. Join a group. Help someone who needs it. Make today so full and meaningful there’s no room to dwell on yesterday.
Narrate calmly. How we experience the world is largely a result of how we internalize it. Instead of telling yourself dramatic stories about the past—how hurt you were or how hard it was—challenge your emotions and focus on lessons learned. That’s all you really need from yesterday.
Open your mind. We often cling to things, situations or people because we’re comfortable with them. We know how they’ll make us feel, whether it’s happy or safe. Consider that new things, situations and people may affect you the same. The only way to find out is to let go of what’s come and gone.
Letting Go of Attachment to Outcomes
Practice letting things be. That doesn’t mean you can’t actively work to create a different tomorrow. It just means you make peace with the moment as it is, without worrying that something’s wrong with you or your life, and then operate from a place of acceptance.
Question your attachment. If you’re attached to a specific outcome—a dream job, the perfect relationship—you may be indulging an illusion about some day when everything will be lined up for happiness. No moment will ever be worthier of your joy than now because that’s all there ever is.
Release the need to know. Life entails uncertainty, no matter how strong your intention. Obsessing about tomorrow wastes your life because there will always be a tomorrow on the horizon. There are no guarantees about how it will play out. Just know it hinges on how well you live today.
Serve your purpose now. You don’t need to have x-amount of money in the bank to live a meaningful life right now. Figure out what matters to you, and fill pockets of time indulging it. Audition for community theater. Volunteer with animals. Whatever you love, do it. Don’t wait—do it now.
Teach others. It’s human nature to hope for things in the future. Even the most enlightened people fall into the habit from time to time. Remind yourself to stay open to possibilities by sharing the idea with other people. Blog about it. Talk about it. Tweet about it. Opening up helps keep you open.
Letting Go of Attachment to Feelings
Understand that pain is unavoidable. No matter how well you do everything on this list, or on your own short list for peace, you will lose things that matter and feel some level of pain. But it doesn’t have to be as bad as you think. As the saying goes, pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.
Vocalize your feelings. Feel them, acknowledge them, express them, and then let them naturally transform. Even if you want to dwell in anger, sadness or frustration—especially if you feel like dwelling—save yourself the pain and commit to working through them.
Write it down. Then toss it out. You won’t always have the opportunity to express your feelings to the people who inspired them. That doesn’t mean you need to swallow them. Write in a journal. Write a letter and burn it. Anything that helps you let go.
Xie Xie. It means thank you in Chinese. Fully embrace your happy moments—love with abandon; be so passionate it’s contagious. If a darker moment follows, remember: it will teach you something, and soon enough you’ll be in another happy moment to appreciate. Everything is cyclical.
Yield to peace. The ultimate desire is to feel happy and peaceful. Even if you think you want to stay angry, what you really want is to be at peace with what happened or will happen. It takes a conscious choice. Make it.
Zen your now. Experience, appreciate, enjoy, and let go to welcome another experience.
It won’t always be easy. Sometimes you’ll feel compelled to attach yourself physically and mentally to people and ideas—as if it gives you some sense of control or security. You may even strongly believe you’ll be happy if you struggle to hold onto what you have. That’s OK. It’s human nature.
Just know you have the power to choose from moment to moment how you experience things you enjoy: with a sense of ownership, anxiety, and fear, or with a sense of freedom, peace and love.
The most important question: what do you choose right now?”
Hi Ines,
Is this working for you? I feel that you would have to constantly work at it like chipping wood from a tree….
Look, you have to get to know yourself and make your own “rules” .
You learn how to work with yourself like “baking a cake”…objectiveness I guess is the right word.
Yes, Gatubela
I have to CONSCIOUSLY work at it until it becomes my nature when I don’t have to do this anymore CONSCIOUSLY because it becomes ME.
It is working already. Slowly. A lifetime is ahead.
Thank you
Hi Ines,
You always have to work at it…our consciousness is always expanding…hopefully, if we have the faith to believe in “infinity”…
Meaning, nothing is impossible.
Don´t limit yourself…and feel how it is to “float in nothingness”…
The mind expects a result…and the soul does not.
OK, the “mode of operation” here is not to react, but to relate. But only human (thanks, Pluto, see below) – I feel my reactions. So…
Pluto has described how my soul has not been given that understanding
“These people are not ordained in their respective physical life, in this stage of this body, so they were not born TO DEAL with a rich inner, transforming experience – via Death and Rebirth.”, because mine is a baby sould and will never evolve – in my body.
Breaking free of that reality is too risky for a little lamb, yes even “a black sheep”… so that lamb has the soul path, …so that little follower/conformed fluffy sheep is — A WORRIER… ”
Why try then? If I was pre-ordaned from birth to be a sheep, any efforts to cross the barrier are furtile, and I should just bloody go back to the flock and… be tortured with the knowledge acquired, yet, knowing that I will NEVER evolve?
This last sentense “be tortured with the knowledge acquired, yet, knowing that I will NEVER evolve”…. To illustrate – When one moves countries – one loses their native cultural identity to a great degree. I am a mutable sign and have done that. BUT one NEVER quite acquires the host country national character either. So… You become someone IN LIMBO- not belonging to either.
This is what it feels like for me right now. I have stepped away from the flock, but not quite have left the pen to join the unknown.
The question remains then ‘If you are not destined to cross the barrier – why try?” Is that because my soul will evolve to a certain point, then get re-incarnated and carry on evolving to the ascendence stage? Damn it, I don’t believe in re-incarnation. And what an altruistic concept…. Pass on your ‘improved’ soul to another…
Hey… my twopence of reaction. And why the fuck do I care that much? Back to the flock. Baaaah.
Cheers, folks. Really fills me with hope.
“..Why try then? If I was pre-ordaned from birth to be a sheep, any efforts to cross the barrier are furtile, and I should just bloody go back to the flock and… be tortured with the knowledge acquired, yet, knowing that I will NEVER evolve?..”
I’m setting the bar very high, not to change you. I give of me to help us understand one another.
I am personally not asking you “to try” to be someone you’re not. As you have read from me, I know your specific soul path is not supposed to be my soul path. We have lived entirely DIFFERENT EXPERIENCES, thus our soul paths, in our given physical bodies bestow us critical life lessons according to “our reality” and “our capacity for greater consciousness” via heart intelligence, not logic. That lived reality is who we are, whether that is manifested as complete lie-of-self, or whether that understanding is a seer of ones unconscious myth. So what I have done here on the forum is distinguish my spirituality in detail with you and everyone here, in the hope, optimism and faith of unifying us and bringing us closer with higher understanding of the divine light buried within us. My hope is for Higher understanding for all involved. That understanding transcends any unconscious superficial banter, pretense, and acting in our written expression. My hope was to show people there is much wealthier goodness and love inside each of you, which you are not aware of thanks to conformed societal oppression and fear.
“..knowing that I will NEVER evolve?..”
Please detach from the analytical fear of finding your soul through scientific thinking. You can slowly and consciously learn to feel more consciously each minute, each day, each month, each year. So the point of relating with yourself which nourishes during any apparent experience happening in your life, is vital experience for self-awareness and self-healing. If you can learn how to love deeply and openly in the moment, with your essence and with another person in the now, instead of methodically thinking your way through a moment (the Worrier), or circumstances, you will see yourself becoming stronger and solidified in your being, due to confronting any discomfort and empty feelings of meaninglessness in your life.
It all begins with you, and it all ends with you. Once you build enough emotional IQ to see yourself clearly as the cause and culprit of your martyrdom and confusion (in the Outer) you will mend those fragments of ego and dissolve them into soul.
In Truth, again these are not “just words”… most people were not born with a capacity to feel life through emotional-psychological evolution. People among thousands of cultural flocks, think through life sweetheart, as you naturally do. I cannot denounce thinking “is wrong”… all I can do is demonstrate that “thinking” in my life extremes was the limitation of heart and soul discovery, because ego hunger was honored as happiness, while any real feeling was suppressed, denied and feared.
“Once you build enough emotional IQ to see yourself clearly as the cause and culprit of your martyrdom and confusion ”
I knew that. Again, instinctively. One of my very early posts “But here is the thing… The suffering is largely self-inflicted. As long as I understand that – no other person’s action can and will bring suffering to me.”
Thank you. Pluto, what is in these exchanges for you? I know you said learning brings you joy… what do you learn here? Why?
Again. WHY?
Well if you knew it, perhaps you could be the death (change) from it?
“…what do you learn here? Why?”
“Again. WHY?”
I receive who I am in a holistic sense here with the Source of all nature, by writing freely without the conformed boundaries of social ignorance and superficiality… which is a vicarious disease I see and feel in the personalities of human beings every day.
How could the freedom of my expression here, BE USEFUL among that disease, when I’m partying, drinking alcohol (I don’t drink btw) talking about the money I’m making, hearing about the money, toys and exciting “things” are the people are doing, the people they’re “hooking up with”, “the accomplishments” of the image they mirror with each other in that Outer existence??
You tell me, how I am supposed to just wipe away the Truth of who I am, among the noise, fear, clutter, futility, bullshit, and dysfunction of human ego’s fulfilling each other’s ego’s through AN ILLUSION OF LOVE??… You tell me how my soul is suited for speaking the Truth of who I am in THAT society?? Who would give a rats ass??.. Who would want to know what I know, while in their known??
Not rhetorical questions. I am asking real and sincere questions.
THIS is what has always been playing in the back of my mind (sorry, mind yeah) while we are talking here. I was asking myself the same questions, and if you remember this is not the first time I asked you… In various forms.
Sanctuary?
I don’t drink either. Or, rather, I ATTEMPT to get drunk once every two three YEARS – doesn’t work.
Please be you. Always.
I feel like…… never mind.
“..Who would want to know what I know, while in their known??”
So full circle again. The existence of the Eagle is a loner. Regardless of how many love him, hate him or ignore him.;)
That is my path. A path I wouldn’t trade for Kim Kardashian’s life path.;)
we are all loners. we are born alone and we die alone.There are people who are remember the connection and there are those that dont.
Those who don’t remember – form artificial and superficial ‘connections’ in their lives,,, in order not to feel the fear of loneliness. It is understandable. But I’d rather be alone if it is not real.
The aloneness of dying… I mean real dying… I’ve seen it.
I am beginning to understand that our attachements to things, people, situations are born out of one thing – the fear of change. Nothing ever stays the same, everything changes from minute to minute, and we completely fail to live in the moment of it. And change means…. yep, the unknown. What is there around the corner that we have yet to face. So.. we are attached to how things are and how we want them to remain. Without ever changing.
Attachment is a form of control, exercised subconsciously. When this ‘control’ fails (i.e. things do change regardless) – we feel pain and loss and suffering.
Accepting any given moment as is sets you free. From fear.
One small step in the right direction…
Hi Ines,
“How does one let go of an attachment to another? A long standing one?”
By truly loving them, in awareness and unconditionally, feeling your own inner energies and surrendering only to his higher self through the Divine.
Gatubela, do you think the notion of ‘love’ as understood out there may be mixed WITH the notion of attachment? i.e. ‘love’ = attachment. Notice that I have put ‘love’ in inverted commas. Do people confuse the two?
“…the notion of ‘love’..”
Believing “love as a notion” is the first instilled myth. A myth “created” by thinking.
Love is beyond intellect. Love is an energy FELT, GIVEN and RECEIVED in the now. When a person can feel forces — “beyond our perceived self-significance” we know that Love is available every breath in the present.
Remember the immortal mind of Gandhi who said…. “Everything you do in life will be INSIGNIFICANT (yes that includes being Bill Gates, Oprah Winfrey, or Barack Obama)… but do it anyway”.
“Do it anyway”, means live your soul path be it unconscious or conscious. The meaning in Gandhi’s statement is this: — We all Die. And we all die very rapidly –> in the scheme of the Power that is this Universe. We are star dust. Relativity baby.
Love is God (eternity). Thinking is illusion (ego).
Hmmm… Do you know my SKYPE blip says ‘everything is relative’. This is very close to my heart. And Einstein was a Piscean huh. Imagination knows no bounds.
Hugs
I’ve always felt there is only one truly unconditional love – parents for their children. UNCONDITIONAL. It just is.
This role by Gerard Butler (a Scorpio Sun) is A CLASSIC MARS in Scorpio male archetype. CLASSICALLY imbibed energy which I am through my core being of today’s civilian world. Feel the intensity and passion of this guy. Understand the contrast between spiritual eternity, not fearing death — but honoring our death and welcoming it — versus, the political cowardice, the tyranny, disillusionment, mythical oppression and soulless domination influenced by the pretentious fool wearing jewels and gold – (The material seduction of life). There are many symbols and representations through this entire film which reflect the essence of me. Fearless love and justice is also at the core of this films message. You guys have to know it, feel it, as to know dimensions of me.
THIS…IS….HADES!!!!! (and you clearly see the reasons why the warrior is a warrior)
***KICK***
Beautiful understanding Gatubela.
Hades does compromise (his will) in deep, receptive love. He will never compromise (his will) through another’s fear, manipulation, control and illusion to ‘care’.
Much Love
Pluto
The messenger says there: “Choose… your next words carefully”…
Translation in civilian life folks?
In the world of jobs, of survival, and of employers, even romantic relationships and parental conditioning… that translates as — “do as I say, not as I do… because I am the one in control here of you and your working/feeling fate”… “Work under the oppression of heart and soul which knows no divinity, because I sign your paycheck / or I am co-dependently dysfunctional and afraid in our bullshit relationship… I am the one in control… never forget that”.
So people conform with each other to exist in safety. They survive and buy nice things and eat and drink like animals with each other. Then they have sex to soothe the earlier meal. = Animal-self.
More translation folks from the top — “bow to me, because you are fearful of my controlling fear to intimidate and manipulate you in the material world.” … and I know you will submit your will to me, so you can enjoy the animal pleasures I can provide”.
Your boss or corporation or bank or school, or family or lovers or friendships mean this: —> ” I OWN YOU. I own your capacity of soul. Because you fear the Truth of your Shadow, and you sell it out so easily”.
The Higher-mind from brave soul — versus the Lower animal-self to avert death of the ego and live in fear. This guy is speaking form raw soul —> pure instincts. He is Not “thinking”.
Hmmm… I so remember watching this. Leonidas commits HIMSELF and some others to death. What it doesn’t tell is that he also let the rest of the army LEAVE – to be saved. And I didn’t like that ommision.
But yeah… he knew it was suicide. In the name of honour and united Greece.
Or, rather… because he couldn’t BE any other way.
No. “Suicide” is a life taken from immense emotional fear. Warriors don’t live and die for the goal of suicide. Cowards die for suicide. Understand that before you make reckless ego quips.
Honour and courage within a person are obviously only words to you. No surprise there.
“..What it doesn’t tell is that he also let the rest of the army LEAVE – to be saved…”
What?! … Where do you get that information?
He let ONE Spartan “leave”… and that was the warrior with one eye damaged from battle. He wanted that warrior to return alive to the women, council chamber and children to tell the story of men who gave their lives. At the end of the movie you see him narrating the whole story.
The Arcadian’s (seen in the clip) were tradesman who initially joined allegiances with the Spartans. After knowing they were out numbered, the Arcadian’s broke that allegiance, they turned their backs on sacrifice, tremendous bravery and courage… something of which you obviously understand very well. The Arcadian’s were fearful of immanent death. They were not born killers.
Your reckless and conceited ego whim about something spiritually meaningful is very amusing to me.;)
You fit the Xerxes control and abusive measures reality perfectly. He might offer you lavish riches and sensual pleasures for the rest of your physical life… but first you must bow to him and remind him of his power over you. People do that in their jobs every single fucking day.
What?! … Where do you get that information?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Thermopylae
“Learning from a runner that the Phocians had not held the path, Leonidas called a council of war at dawn.[80] Some of the Greeks argued for withdrawal, but Leonidas resolved to stay at the pass with the Spartans.[80] Many of the Greek contingents then either chose to withdraw (without orders), or were ordered to leave by Leonidas (Herodotus admits that there is some doubt about which actually happened).[80][81] The contingent of 700 Thespians, led by their general Demophilus, refused to leave with the other Greeks but committed themselves to the fight.[82] Also present were the 400 Thebans, and probably the helots that had accompanied the Spartans.[79]”
If you want me to be mutable and say NOTHING – FINE. Be amused – at silence. You said yourself people here are at different stages of understanding. So why the fuck do you choose to tear at me EVERY TIME? I think of all people I am the special target. Because I speak how I see it, regardless of whether it resonates with you or not.
See below, just so that you know why I am OUT. You want that? Fine, Mr World Wide Domination.
“Understand that before you make reckless ego quips.”
“Honour and courage within a person are obviously only words to you. No surprise there”
“You fit the Xerxes control and abusive measures reality perfectly. ”
All you had to do is ASK why I wrote that. But do you fucking care other than expressing yourself? Do you?
“No. “Suicide” is a life taken from immense emotional fear. Warriors don’t live and die for the goal of suicide. Cowards die for suicide. Understand that before you make reckless ego quips.”
See below. Iam not fucking stupid. Out now.
“At the Battle of Plataea, Aristodemus fought with such fury that the Spartans regarded him as having redeemed himself. Although they removed the black mark against his name, they would not award him any special honors for his valour because he had fought with suicidal recklessness; the Spartans having regarded as more valorous those who fought while still wishing to live. “
“But yeah… he knew it was suicide.”
At the moment that you are on the battlefield, you “WERE NEVER THERE” in the name of honour and united Greece.
Well…maybe “b-a-a-a-a” cannon fodder…
But not Scorpio…
Scorpionic energies are a bit more “too heart” and extremely personal. And their LIFE always means something…therefore, it will STRATEGICALLY be used with the objective of WINNING the HADEAN dark undercurrent SHADOW energy, currently being picked up by their radar …if it is too be used at all. So..what you see and READ, is never the REAL battle.
You don´t give your life up, let it go, or kill it, like “letting a turd go in the toilet…”
The spirit of the movie was not represented in your wiki copy paste…as the importance of having your life and LIVES MEAN something, is lacking.
“Because I speak how I see it, regardless of whether it resonates with you or not.”
Me too!!! Or rather…HOW I FEEL IT!!! But I can give a pretty good rational arguement, when I want to as well. But it feels….cold.
But tough ass girly-tude “rationalizing” a feeling or sentiment being expressed by a person, and using a COPY PASTE from WIKI in order to “WIN” an arguement, in an attempt to compensate for lack of experience (?)as these intentions are now manifested by your comments, without any effort in feeling, other than blowing up at someone, just makes me want to ask a couple of questions.
I loved the research just the same, but you completely missed the emotional point.
“All you had to do is ASK why I wrote that. But do you fucking care other than expressing yourself? Do you?”
You know Ines, I often enjoy placing clauses and pre-requisites on my friendships too…it is entertaining and it conveniently lets me “win” and arguement, or misunderstanding beforehand, without having to really involve or give of myself. Actually, I already KNOW that the person I am dealing with , is passionate and expressive, but I want to still NOT acknowledge that.
I am always “right” be default and by cowardly omission of the “complete” facts.
Just give a partial picture…and cheat people´s trust in truthfully engaging with me, and then turn around and come out with the “rational” sub-clause. Add a bit of name calling, provoke a type of possible communal sentiment that “could be out there”…and see just how the hell this thing turns out.
But since you be rational….
1.
Why don`t you attempt to put yourself in the battle field and see how it feels to “be killed” for honour to Greece?
2.Why does THAT simple action, ESCAPE YOU Ines?
3. What do you care about then? Do you opt for Rationalizing or reaching an understanding through an effort to a mutual FEELING felt experience…that is more enriching to you than COPY PASTE???
Gatubela,
“using a COPY PASTE from WIKI in order to “WIN” an arguement”
I was asked this:
“What?! … Where do you get that information?”
I have answered where.
End of.
I HAVE BEEN SEEING A SCORPIO GUY FOR A WHILE NOW.
HE SAYS HE LOVES ME WITH ALL HIS HEART. I BELIEVE HE DOES.
BUT WHEN HE DOES NOT GET HIS WAY HE GETS UPSET.
HE IS VERY UNSTABLE AT TIMES ( WHY AM I WITH HIM ?)
I ALWAYS SEEM TO END UP WITH THE CRAZIES! I HAVE BEEN WORKING 2 PT JOBS , TRYING TO PAY MY BILLS. HE HAD MONEY HE WASTED ON STUFF . NO DRUGS OR ALCOHOL, BUT HE LIKES TO GAMBLE. ANYWAY WE HAVE BEEN USING MY CREDIT CARD TO PUT GAS IN THE CAR AND BUY GROCERIES. AND HE HAD THE NERVE TO SCREAM AT ME WHILE HE WAS DRING ME TO WORK ONE MORNING.
SAYING I DID NOT CARE ABOUT THE RELATIONSHIP. I THINK HE IS THE ONE THAT DOES’NT MAYBE HE’D BE MORE RESPONSIBLE IF WAS NOT HELPING HIM. BECAUSE HE WOULD NOT HAVE ANY FOOD OR BE ABLE TO PUT GAS IN THE CAR. WE GET INTO ARGUEMENTS ALL THE TIME ABOUT MONEY, BUT WHEN IT’S HIS MONEY THEN IT’S A BIG DEAL BUT WHEN IT’S MY MONEY HE SAYS DON’T WORRY HE WILL TAKE CARE OF IT. WELL MY CREDIT CARD BILL IS OVER 800.00 AND HE HAS NOT GIVEN ME ANY MONEY YET. I KNOW HE IS USING ME AND I WANT OUT . I DO LOVE HIM . AS SOON AS HE PAYS THE BILL ( I KNOW DON’T HOLD MY BREATH. I WILL BE GONE!
“You know Ines, I often enjoy placing clauses and pre-requisites on my friendships too…it is entertaining and it conveniently lets me “win” and arguement, or misunderstanding beforehand, without having to really involve or give of myself.”
And I was actually exagerrating a truly felt experience, in which people played this one on me too.
It was one of the most insiduous and sickening games that have occurred, because people just eat this shit up like candy.
Hmmmm….it tastes good.
Hi BH 1234,
Ummm….that´s a relationship according to you?
Sounds like the both of you are oppressed, pressured people who are not interested in love at all.
Sorry about the credit card bill…but hey? Why have one in the first place? Oh…right…normal people do! I hate using them…and would prefer to go without or budget better.
There are always two sides to these type of things…and usually more going on that what your words and accusations are saying.
But a relationship takes a committment to “the person” and not “money and materialism”…
They are separate…
You and Him…first and always.
Money and all that stuff should not interfere in something so sacred, although I understand the seeming reality of things.. It becomes a monster and destroys anything that was once beautiful.
I mean, the first time he looked at you…was money on both of your minds? That was probably one hell of a moment…for its sheer rawness and purity.
Too bad…it is now reduced to “he owes me…and I love him, but as soon as he pays me, I am out of here…”
Yikes…that seems very cold.
bh1234
I don’t know how long he has owed you but…
Cut your losses and leave him. He won’t pay you back if he got up to $800.00 and has not paid anything back within a week.. kinda shows how much he respects you……….very little. Maybe you did something that lost his respect… ask him.
Credit cards are traps.. pay it off and cut it up.
As for your comment about being stuck with “crazies”…..maybe you make them crazy?
That all caps post almost made me go crazy! Not really but, you catch my drift?
If you are a teen, you should NOT have a credit card.
If you are an adult, you should NOT share it with ANYONE. Not even your MOM!
dj, no i did not do anything to lose his respect. i have been helping him
with my credit card to put food on the table and gas in his car. if i did not have
a credit card we would not be eating. i am the only one of us who is working.
i have two part time jobs. he has done little to work. no i have done nothing to make him crazy , except he always says he is crazy in love with me.my friends
are telling me to dump him, it’s not so easy , not only does he owe me money
but we have a cat that we share taking care of. i want so much to have this work out , because i was married twice and very bad marriages. but when i was alone i did not have all these problems. when it;s his money it’s like this is all i have he will tell me, but when it’s my credit/money i am not supposed to get upset. i don’t give him the credit card to hold , i have it but i have let him use it like i said for gas for his car. another reader said i was cold for wanting to leave after he pays me what he owes me. what would they do ? is death quicker than suffering?
Hi BH,
Yes, I was the one who said that you were cold…
This comment was based on my experiences actually. And the fact that I want you to feel something.
That we prioritize as women, the wrong things. What is “being in love” to you?
For me, love is love….and this world we live in to survive, is not meant for it.
The man is making you feel, the things he should. Your coldness is due to the fact that you permit it, instead of feeling love within you.
Its not that I am intolerant to a real life situation, where the guy can have real problems….I just felt that you are not feeling love.
So, not feeling this vibrant energy in you, and not priotizing it in your life…is coldness.
If you had felt this in you, your questions would have been answered and the problem would have been solved in the best and most effective way possible, for him and for you.
gatubela, no you said i was cold for wanting to leave him after he paid me what he owed me. the thing is i do love him which makes it hard for me not to help him but when he makes no attempt to work and then cries and gets depressed because he can’t pay his bills, and i have gone out and beyond what i should be , we are not married . he wanted me to move in with him.
i would not with someone who is obviiosly not responsible. i am not opressed
but depressed yes. alot . i keep hoping things will get better . i hope they will.
because otherwise i am packing up my stuff and leaving. i don’t deserve to be used. maybe he is confusing love for security. without me he would have nothing.
” what would they do ? is death quicker than suffering?”
Cute.
I will answer this as well…as this is exactly what happened to me…
I got to know myself…plain and simple. Your comments indicate that you have not obtained greater meaning from your problems – i.e. you are just reacting to the money issue, as if that is the only thing wrong here.
I just see that your choices in men reflect the more REAL issue, that requires soulful exploring.
The truth? Yeah…death is quicker! What kind of a casual question is that? Be more specific…
Maybe the death of your ego may take “eons”. LoL
But not learning from your suffering, through some sort of understanding of truth, makes me feel that you are an active pariticipant of “blindness”.
Reactions, without awareness, with out deeper self knowledge, are just survival mechanisms…and not based on love at all. I mean, you may “love” him…but what truth and CHANGE have you gained for yourself?
Cold.
Not knowing the situation of the guy, inclines me to focus on you and your deeper issue. Why? Because your daily financial life won´t change greatly if he is in your life or not…right? I mean, you will still be working two jobs, for the next guy who comes along, after you leave this one?
So, what will change? I hope that it is you.
i am not sure what you are trying to say. i do love myself and i count my blessings everyday. and when i leave him , i am not getting into another relationship again for a long time…..! i was doing perfectly fine by myself.
but i lost my job of 19years . and sometimes you meet the wrong person.
but you don’t know it because they usually hide their true intent until later into
the relationship. and again i will say i do love him, but i don’t need my credit to go into the crapper i worked to hard to get.
Hi Again BH,
Yes…more and more that I read these comments, the complex nature of love is just screaming to be examined!!!
So, I will approach it from another angle. Sorry for any assumptions here, sometimes the forum is a bit on the straight and narrow, based on limitted information.
Yes…you feel that you love him. But what is love to you? Well, your idea of what love is, can be witnessed in his reaction to you. You will get glimpses of your own sexual nature and inner work on LOVE.
His idea of love, is your reaction to him. So, you have more deeper issues here.
A woman who does not devote herself to understanding love, limits something that has no limits, by her own rationality, lack of connection to the divine, her own energetic unresolved but absorbed darkness, justifications and survival B.S.
Your darkness here is riddled with your unbalance. In the end, it won´t matter what you feel you deserve or don´t deserve. Your priority should be to understand clearly what love is and get to know and love yourself.
I know that this experience perhaps has taught you that “he confused love for security” and “I don{t deserve to be used”…but really…that is still surface reactions, to something much deeper…..
I feel that you need to detach yourself from these statements and go deeper.
You have a unique autonomy and can actually take the time to do this. So do it. It is better to go through these things now, instead of ignorantly deciding to “not choose a guy who confuses love with security”…but perhaps confusing love for something else?
I mean…you still don´t FEEL love inside you and a separate and vibrant force…right?
Hi BH,
hmmmm….so your relationship is worth $800.00? Or is there actually a deeper feeling here?
As I said, I understand the reality of things….when was the moment that everything went wrong?
She started by saying… Not really easy for me to talk…..
….when I start telling the truth people start squirming!!!!
Most people only see the words…. but unable or choose not to feel “heart” and “soul”…
Hahaha!! “Sometimes it’s hard to be a woman”….. What a bloody conflict. Thanks, Lovemari.
lol COUGAR.
“SEX cause im real”
“does it hurt? NO! It feels GOOD!” LOL
hmmmm Why is it so? Why do feel like it is hard to be a woman sometimes?
I didn’t mean myself, but Scorpio women.
A Scorpio woman always wears pants, even when she dresses like a nymph, from my observations of the ones I know and have known.
Hi Ines,
I don´t feel that you truly know what you are talking about….
People have a choice, and scorpio is not an exception…
It is our BLINDNESS of greater energies, that spurs these types of comments…and also reduces us, and I include scorpionic women who make this choice as well. I have a scorpionic component…and I also struggle with these energies. Oh yeah…if I wanted too…I could just dress up as a “nymph” and sizzle off the pants that I wear…LoL…
It is the fact that people succumb to the societal view of “being a woman”…and do not “fight” against this incredible “seductive” temptation to acquire power through lies, instead of power through truth. They do not STRUGGLE against the essential TRUTH that they are using it to MANIPULATE the sexual energy.
Orgasmic energy is a limitation of scorpionic energy…and ALL scorpios who work on this apsect of themselves, know damn well what I am talking about.
These energies must be cultivated, through soulful virtue…or they will remain invisible just in your peripheral vision.
Its bloody hard to be a woman who truly has tried to work with this energy in its purest and most beautiful sense.
Not the stuff that I am seeing in this video, however true it may be, however entertaining it may be, it is still a limitation to your deaf ears.
this is all getting a bit much..
No Umm… fighting with me actually brings us closer together. Inconceivable “madness” (as the guy says in the clip)… isn’t it??… Well sweetheart… the love energy is supposed to be made mutually real. That’s my true mission.
Pluto,
I am calm, and I will say it ONCE.
By jumping on the back of anyone who expresses themselves, no matter how MISGUIDED it might be – you will eventually stop anyone from expressing themselves.
Then you will have people only express what they think you might like to hear.
Then you will feel that they are not being true – MISTRUSTING them.
Then you will start digging for faults to see if your mistrust is justified.
Then you will discover that it was justified.
Without realising that you have been creating mistrust YOURSELF all along.
How many people are ACTIVELY participating in conversations with you now? Two, including me.
How many are silently reading these conversations? Many more.
WHY SO? Ponder it. Even if it doesn’t matter to you.
When a child is learning maths, and the teacher tears at him every time there is a mistake made – the child will lose any interest in learning maths.
I have accepted that you will always want to uncover more, will always look for deeper meaning behind questions and expressions.
I like that. A LOT.
I DON’T accept that you will remain RUDE while doing so, and will remain RUDE in pointing that out.
I have no wish to participate in this anymore, as you cannot remain civil.
Thank you for all your contributions.
Good bye.
Hi Ines,
“I was asked this: “What?! … Where do you get that information?”
I have answered where. End of.”
Yeah…I guess I would expect this kind of rational response. I have seen this before…flowing with those calm energies, not acknowledging the fact that you don´t really want to understand, and then minimizing it into “the end”…
Overall, refusing to see how you contribute to the sense of distrust that you are an active participant of. You just, toss it to the nearest civil and socially accepted behavioral rule…
Evolved Scorpio follows their own internal energies…based on their perception of the dark collective energies and the pain they cause. It is to END suffering. They don´t use the dark collective energies that you also have admitted to perceiving, to placify and prolong suffering.
You have no idea what it really takes to “end something”…. You did not end anything, you just validated your own ignorance and separation from divine energies. You used a generally used fear reaction to anything that is different and revolutionary, as a way to validate your position?
Ines, when people have decided that they have had enough of illusional civility and the daily “I accept the lie routine”….you WANT to speak out. You recognize these energies in the speech of a person as well. As for seeing the spirit behind the comments….you WOULD not want to minimize the spirit of someone who IS.
Your post (1358) is one of the biggest lies I have seen….people are more outspoken here in some places in Latin America.
You can´t put the reasons for societal failures and disgraces, illusional civility behavioral mores, (instead of LOVE, understanding and compassion) as a JUSTIFICATION for your accusation of RUDENESS.
Why don´t you ask for and seek understanding with him, without trying to minimize the truth?
Hi Ines,
And I really want to know….
Are women really that way? Please….I feel that most women would feel insulted by your “teaching and voicing out” of the current generalizations of the limitting motivations of their potential interactions.
You patronizingly negate the existence of anything REAL in them. REAL experiences, see way beyond what you just wrote. REALITY Ines…not dreams and rationalizations.
You negate that we are capable of loving, that love is capable of BEING beyond what “see”….and pull it off nicely by promoting that our sense of LOVE disappears under the weight of an honest, rough and tough, scruffy eagle guy.
Hmmmm….what to do with someone who has …..a well defined personality.
According to you, us women are deficient and want “the cherry on top”…
There is no cherry on top in Society…your life experiences (the lie that you are promoting) have shown that more than once.
Do you see how a well defined personality, in tune with the divine, stands firm?
It bows only to love….
Gatubela,
YOU manage to convey the meanings without making it personal. It may be harsh at times, but – not personal. In fact, I understood perfectly what you meant about Spartans.
Now, how necessary was it to include those?
“Understand that before you make reckless ego quips.”
“Honour and courage within a person are obviously only words to you. No surprise there”
“You fit the Xerxes control and abusive measures reality perfectly. ”
How does that EXPLAIN where I might have been wrong? How does that HELP any understanding?
Ah, but maybe it is NOT about helping anyone to understand. It is all about self expression. Pluto’s.
I KNOW he cannot help himself if he PERCEIVES me as all those things above. I know he FEELS compelled to express that. But it might (just might) not be true – what he sees and feels as his immediate perception.
The bottom line is: is it all about helping others understand?
Or is it all about Pluto’s self expression?
If it is ALL about his self expression – I will leave him to self express.
Bye.
Hi Ines,
“Now, how necessary was it to include those?”
Oh…you want the cherry on top…and for him to lie to the spirit of his original post, in which you did not perceive.
Because understanding something does not require coddling energies…not really. You prefer the lie…
I mean…I understand things….what is really going on, even when my boss is telling me that he “cares”….Huge lies…on a daily basis, in which I know the truth of the matter. Now…he gives me the cherry on top….but it is only the cherry….and the lie. He does not give a shit about anything REAL..because that would mean that he actually gave a dam, and his actions would have to match his “words”…
Because the truth would be the following:
I am just using you because you are earning me money….and you are cheap labor…
And not
I am interesting in improving your working conditions…($$$)
TRULY understanding, means that you are “untouchable”….in terms of your own inner energies.
The truth in yourself, resonates much stronger, than any word that is thrown at you. You just can´t hold a state of inner peace, and took a window of opportunity to blame your failure in this aspect, on someone who was being honest and brings these things out in you.
How does that EXPLAIN where I might have been wrong? How does that HELP any understanding?
Well Geez….I am not interested in changing the guy….that would take something very vital from the universe….
I don´t care that he thinks I am wrong. I will listen to my own energies more…and if they say , “its alright”…then I will change.
Being right or wrong is so limitting and useless. I am more interested in being MORE and learning. I won´t truly trust right or wrong energies to do this. It is dualistic and separating me from GOD. I won´t choose to grow on the seeds of limitation…Nor am I interested in touching someone with these seeds.
Perhaps that is the difference between you and me. I don´t try to take the pluto away from the puppy.
“..By jumping on the back of anyone who expresses themselves, no matter how MISGUIDED it might be – you will eventually stop anyone from expressing themselves…”
“By jumping on the back of anyone???……” Hahahaha.
My initial giving of the clip was to help people understand MY NATURE. Yes, I was born with a nature, while in nature… and so were you.
The expression I had given illustrated in the movie is THE KILLER in me. A huge part of my soul relates to the deep spiritual messages of the movie. To put those spiritual energies, spiritual intensities in layman’s terms in the real world of fear and debate, here just for you: KILL or BE KILLED.
There is no room or time “for egotistical discussion or debate” DURING battle. So I gave you… have given you… and every other person involved with my conflict and provocation, THE REALNESS of me.
Whether you approve of that energy or not, is not my concern. Because I am giving. AND YOU ARE RUNNING again.
I had used the movie to share with you and everyone. You did not use the actual movie to prove your “rightness”. You chose the easy way, like the cowards who bow to their employers. Congratulations. Would you like the pseudo-intellectual medal of honor for that manifestation? … What ‘understanding’ can two people really have if one is always fearful and blind of ones inner-self?
“.Then you will have people only express what they think you might like to hear..”
No. That is a clean-cut reflection of your motivations and social ignorance little brat.
“Then you will feel that they are not being true – MISTRUSTING them.”
No. Your entire ego entities are riddled with fear and mistrust. I don’t trust cowards. That… is very true.
“WHY SO? Ponder it. Even if it doesn’t matter to you.”
Everything richly emotional and complex within us matters to me. “PONDERING” however … is the for the many institutions of pseudo-intellectuals who keep each others illusions nice and safe and distant from the energy of Truth.
“..Then you will start digging for faults to see if your mistrust is justified.
Then you will discover that it was justified.”
More irony: The only thing you have “justified” is your lack of soul meaning and self-knowledge throughout your heartless reality to debate. Miss Politician… It’s quite a reality you share in contrast.
You are arguing with someone who laughs at the motivations for hollow arguing. You are “fighting” with a male who has “killed” the personality and transcended it over and over.
“Good bye”
Well good bye young lady.
Used ONLY one insult this time – ‘little brat’
An achievement.
No…you just validated his opinion of you, by giving a bratty response.
LoL!!!
No… a bratty response to a bratty line within post. Actually, this post was near GRACIOUS compared to some other ones.
I don’t care if Pluto thinks shit about me…. nah, lying – I do. But this little corner where any kind of personal commenting on who one is or isn’t…
Answer me this please…
“You fit the Xerxes control and abusive measures reality perfectly. He might offer you lavish riches and sensual pleasures for the rest of your physical life… but first you must bow to him and remind him of his power over you.”
If you are so understanding of the man, how did he actually arrive at this passage above to decribe me? What in my (very short) post 1353 gave him this feeling?
Can you answer this question honestly? Without saying ‘Ines, you are this and you are that’?
Hi Ines,
hmmmm….
You are funny Ines…very well. I will answer your question.
“You fit the Xerxes control and abusive measures reality perfectly. He might offer you lavish riches and sensual pleasures for the rest of your physical life… but first you must bow to him and remind him of his power over you.”
Your apparent insistence in rationalizing, instead of seeking AWARENESS in truth in your responses, is what makes you easy prey for the illusionary lie that you are oh so passionately defending. There is only one thing that makes you strong, and that is feeling your connection to your own inner energies and virtue.
Cultivating these energies, makes them the predominant force in your life. Actually, they can evolve and help you as well. It feels as if they have a life of their own…and that you are NOT alone. That initial feeling is how it starts. It ends with you FEELING invincible through the feeling of eternalness in your TRUTH and Virtue.
Eternal….is how you live your life…and what you are, when you face GOD at those gates. Because the absence of what you ARE NOT….will make you quiver in fear.
What is eternal? Welll…you did not see the “this is sparta” clip I posted. It clearly shows a warrior´s reasons for battle. It was LOVE.
You cave in to the easiest thing floating around in your own ego…
A person who cultivates warrior energies, knows what it takes to truly battle….and it is nothing TANGIBLE…
The intangibles of battle are the treasures that have to be sought out.
Well I know how much you love the word ‘bunny’… so figured you’d enjoy the truth of your femininity by reminding you about the times when you put on that plastic army helmet, ready for for ferocious battle with pink shield and bunny sword in hand. You look so cute in that.;)
Sigh…. And why exactly do you want to take me back there?
Thank you, and that was….hmmm…comprehensive. The Xerxes passage is symbolic, may be. I took it literally. And that pissed me off.
The language that you two use is beyond understanding. Although I understand YOUR expressions better. The last few ones – certainly.
Pluto once said to me ‘Be nice.’
Well, be nice, Pluto, as much as your energies allow. I know you can. I am sensitive, and I will react to personal comments. Take it or leave it. I accept you jogging into the sunset if you must.
To remind you of your beauty, and innocence even if you don’t believe in those gifts yourself. All of this has been, has meant… love, in my world. I can’t force you to love, only show you that love is never what it notionally seems.;)
May you live forever little foggy one.;)
I will live forever… remember…. a new improved soul. You migh inherit it one day in your next life he-he.What a nightmare for you, Pluto darling
I think my post got lost up there, so I’ll re-post it here:
———–
“Hmm. What is the specific direction destined for people who relish living in superficiality? Are they living like this because they have not questioned…because they have not confronted…because they have not tried to connect? Is their soul’s destiny what they are are living like now (and for the rest of their life) or was it always to connect with the Divine?
What are yours views on destiny, fate, and free will? Are they separate entities or One?”
Hi Satnam!!!!
We have not forgotten about you!!!
What are your current views or feelings?. It is actually impossible to answer for “people” who are different and unique.
Cuz….its a biggie.
Oh…and no links either pleeeaaaasssseeee!
Hi Gatubela!
*smiles* No no…no more links. 🙂 That was petty and presumptuous of me.
I feel that every soul’s path is to realize their Consciousness. Many people think they are on the right path. But how do they know they are not deluding themselves? I feel as if I have come Home…within and part of me and the world…but there is a lot of work to be done…patterns of thought and behavior to break through and kill…I have been practicing giving up control in my life…trying to intuit my decisions and path…surrendering…it is hard, but I feel I need to do this because I was never in ‘control’ in the first place…so why would I think to continue to do so? How do *you* do it? Draw from the source of Energy and Love in every aspect of what you do? How do I know it’s not a figment of my Delusion?
So then is fate when you don’t realize the delusion? And destiny when you Realize.
I observe the world…I observe those of different ‘faiths and religions’…they all think they are right. They feel that path is their destiny. Who am I to say they are wrong or right? But…I don’t understand how everything fits…in the name of these faiths and beliefs, people become smug (like I did on this forum) and violent…follow their basal natures…then was their path their true Destiny? Or were they always deluded?
*sigh*…I’m feeling like a word salad. I need your and Pluto Puppy’s guidance. Trying to break through and learn…to feel that Love deeply and profoundly…endless.
Hi Satnam…
This all depends on what you really want to do…you have not established an objective? Or had a special experience? It will be something intangible as well. Choose the most beautiful and most divine state that you aspire to do. Care to share?
Women have a very special energy…but it is not for me to tell you what it is. Each of us have our own uniqueness…and it is up to us to FIND ourselves, in a place where we are currently lost. This is the abyss.
I feel that you are not mentioning something…*YOU* are missing from your comments.
Hi again Satnam…
Honestly, I did not have time for questions about fate and destiny. I was not rationalizing the love energy…I made it personal. It had to be LIVED.
I struggled with just “keeping my word…” I made a promise to myself, and learnt what it meant to keep it. Yeah..through heaven and hell…and beyond.
Do you know how hard that is?
So…yeah…you will see reality and delusion pretty quickly, if you stick to your guns.
Thank you, Gatubela. I don’t know why I keep rationalizing. I need to move beyond this mind concept. It’s limiting me. I need to continue LIVING it as best as I can…I’m not near my potential…the vast potential of truly LIVING and BREATHING it.
Hi Satnam,
Your goal in life is to stop rational?
In order to stop being rational you have to have some way of feeling heaven and not being afraid to feel hell.
That is the way you cut through your illusions…The answers of the EXACT nature of the illusion are in “hell”…
The love that you need in order for being so weak as to fall for them, are in heaven.
This cyclical movement will occur until you “are no longer attached”…
Gatebula – before I forget – how are your children doing? I remember you writing that you were on the run with them, and the sweetness of you healing them with your food. They must be proud to have such a strong mother.
Hi Satnam,
When you decide to get rid of your illusions, you have to have as a priority, seeking your truth.
So, you may want to make sure that you know how to stabilize yourself into love. Practice that first in your meditations.
My children are alright, thank you.
Well actually, they are quite a handful, with a lot of Sag energy truth “according to each of them” arrows flying all over the dinner table and rebounding from the walls.
Kitty is always having to catch them and is a bit tired sometimes, but it is nice to see their uniqueness come out.
Actually, kitty is almost never home, and cappi has to -try to- make sure there are no fights between padawan and sag. But sag and i end up fighting either because we both want to be boss or one of us has an attittude , and sag and padawan fight ’cause they dissagree on something and one wants to impose their will on the other. Fights between padawan and i are rare. When kitty gets home, she sees the havoc that has been swirling around the place, and well… you know what happens.
When you ARE home(week end), we just want to have fun, but we’re all together, so our personalities clash, or someone has an attitude…again. One wants, the other doesn’t (or they do, but the damns given are not enugh).
This is the moooorning report! :3 (you do remember that song, right?)
Every time a battle takes place – it brings me closer to understanding – an extreme way to learn. My Pluto is in opposition to Mars he-he-he, talking about suppressed warrior Scorpionic energies… in EVERYTHING. It mostly comes out on here, due to Pluto’s induction techniques.
Anyway, Gatubela and Pluto speak of things which are hard to put into words, hence, confusing to most. My layman expression is more accessible and some people may recognise those struggles within themselves.
Sensitivities… Why indeed should it matter how someone perceives you? If I truly know my own being, the opinions of others make it utterly insignificant. The fear of not being accepted, misunderstood, not loved will just fall away. As Gatubela said “TRULY understanding, means that you are “untouchable”….in terms of your own inner energies.”
Yet, it hurts every time a personal comment is made. I got better over the last few weeks; name calling doesn’t touch me anymore. It is what I perceive as deep ‘assumptions’ of WHO I am that still get to me.
There is a catch… If someone senses or knows you are THAT sensitive, they will withdraw TRUTH from you, for fear of hurting you, and will come up with some insignificant babble. People do this all the time out there. They are PROGRAMMED to do that, survival, remember? You have to find a way of cooperating with others, or else – out in the woods on your own. So, without being aware of it I will induce this cycle of lies. Pluto, I am sure, can identify with that from his past.
In real life I am good at handling other’s sensitivities, by delivering the truth in a soft manner. People still get hurt, but I try to soften the blow. That’s who I am.
Of course, here it is delivered brutally. But, again, Gatubela “I don´t care that he thinks I am wrong. I will listen to my own energies more…and if they say , “its alright”…then I will change.”
But THE REAL QUESTION IS: do I TRUST the man’s perception enough to believe that what he perceives IN ME is….TRUE? Do I question his judgement? Do I trust UNCONDITIONALLY? Gatubela feels he is always true and (in that sense) never wrong. My heart is telling me she is right. Yet, I still struggle. So, if that’s the love energy – it is PAINFULLY chipping away at the rock of my defences. And it is working. It physically hurts.
We may fight again…
” Gatubela feels he is always true and (in that sense) never wrong.”
Yes…truth is important in feeling love. You need to be very honest with yourself, when getting to know yourself. You can´t love, what you don´t know…
Illusion is the unacknowledge parts of ourselves, our conformity to our ignorant bliss of , while reacting to the unaknowledged arts of others.
It will be comfortable to you, based on the fact that we are only reacting.
Truth requires that you “confront” yourself, and feel God / Love / Divine.
Any time truth is sought out, love is nearby.
The ONLY time when I truly felt comfortable was when I was asked the six questions. No manipulation, no lies, no right.wrong, just plain straight forward answer/question.
This is what I understand. So I can’t trust someone who uses ‘the tools’ to elicit reaction, to ‘scare the socks off’… And it wasn’t scary, just – untrue.
So, comfortable based on the fact of reacting – no, the opposite. All of this was an illusion.
I read on that Pluto/Mars opposition hmmm… explains a lot, a hard aspect. KILL OR BE KILLED. So I wasn’t too far off when I felt we were similar.
Darn.
HEY. Hypocrite, again. We are nothing similar. Nothing in you, from you, HAS PROVEN your motivations to love openly and bravely. You can’t love, because you AREN’T love, within soul. The love you understand is among the mirror of your flock. The void of soul/heart intelligence in you has never intended to reach out genuinely beyond your rationalizing and court approved adjudication about me and my desire to share. The only thing hurting is “your sensitive” EGO EGG/illusion. That bullshit has been “hurt”.
Stop the stage politics and your kaleidoscope of lies! — Because I am not the flock, I am the only one strong enough to tell you your illusions..
Compare yourself with what you innately understand –> Corrupted thought and corrupted survival means among your corrupted institutions of fear.;)
You’ll keep your game going. That’s you.;)
Gatubela is the only person who knows my soul, both here and in the real world out there.
And she has never had the motivations “to politicize how similar we are”.
Never. Fucking never;)
I am lost for words. The first time ever here…
What now, Pluto? What do you want?
Hi P.Puppy….
Meow….
..”Do I question his judgement?..”
Question your own weightless judgments for a minute and wake up.
As male Scorpio “responded” in the clip 1353… “let each among them search his is own soul… and while you’re at it…. search your own”.
..”What now, Pluto? What do you want?”..
That’s what I want. Have always wanted:)
Pluto, I am tired… we’ve been talking for three weeks non stop, I am getting to know you and Gatubela, and through this i am getting to know me. It is not going to happen overnight… I go out there, look into people’s faces and see not what I used to see… it is exhausting. I have always been private about my inner world, no matter how imperfect and unevolved it looks on your side… people don’t get it if I try, so it has always been mine alone.
Your soul is not my soul, and the comment was about the fighting spirit that I have which propells me to go to the very end… although it doesn’t feel like that right now, I am so tired… I don’t care about anything at this moment in time…
“But THE REAL QUESTION IS: do I TRUST the man’s perception enough to believe that what he perceives IN ME is….TRUE? ”
You have to feel how it is to trust your own inner guidance first. These energies DO not make you question….
But yeah…they can make you feel like your ego is being chipped away.
Ummm….the only thing that would be looking unperfect, is how your ego is trying to fuck with ya! (sorry fer the swear)
Try to see it that way…maybe it helps.
Gatubela,
Thank you for your comment. Yes, chipping away at my ego – hard. You are right in saying that I have to trust my own energies. Transformation doesn’t happen on here, here is bringing the awareness.
Also… I don’t trust Pluto in the way you do. I feel that these ego issues are as much a struggle to him as they are to the rest of us. His responses on here are not about purposefully ADOPTING my reality as he said this before, although some of it may have been true. To me a lot of those feel like a reflection of his own REAL struggles. To me ‘killing personality’ as he says, is also about being humble. One can be very strong and also humble in their strength. So… Pluto doesn’t need to state ‘I am not the flock’, he really doesn’t… if he conquered his ‘ego’. I am not having a go, this is what it feels like to me, but that, again, doesn’t matter.
And yes, we do need ego to survive, and to have none would also be UNTRUE. Because that would mean dissolving the mortal, human part of who we are to the whims of everyone else. Being spineless and ultimately not BEING. To part with ego in a spiritual sense is to know it first. It is a matter of finding the balance between your inner being and your outer (ego) being.
There may be a barrage of words coming again… If there is or there isn’t – it doesn’t matter to me anymore. I have to honour MY being, in all its imperfection, I have to do this every day and be true to my search.
I also wanted to say that I feel your strength in who you are, and your SELFLESSNESS. Something I am yet to learn. Thank you for that. I wish you happiness.
Everything else – away from this forum.
No, I don’t claim to have been humble on here.
Lovemari,
I wanted to thank you for the presence of your soul written in your post on 1103 and others. You deserve the very best a male Scorpio can inject into you.
Sorry for the late gratitude… I got a little caught up in battle, LoL.
Love
Pluto
Lovemari,
I hope you stick around with us here, it would be an honor to hear about your specific journeys, challenges and strengthening of heart and soul through Scorpionic tests and trials of the attached ego-material world.
Much appreciation and love,
Thank you,
Pluto
“..So… Pluto doesn’t need to state ‘I am not the flock’, he really doesn’t… if he conquered his ‘ego’. I am not having a go, this is what it feels like to me, but that, again, doesn’t matter…”
No suppressed one. I was the first to admit and tell everyone I am TOTAL EGO.
You… don’t need “TO TELL” people what “I really shouldn’t be saying”. Got it!!? Where do I mimic that petty political ego-motivation to tell you what you “should be saying “???????????????????????????????????????
Unfortunately, your baby soul is dumbfounded by what Total Ego distinction means.
If you had the intense consciousness and virtue gifted within your being as I have been gifted through my personal experiences, you too would not want the petty games of “right” and “wrong” politicized, planted and lied about you. If in my state of existence, you would defend your spiritual divination with warrior-soul. YOU WOULD COMMUNICATE WITH ME LIKE WE WERE THE ONLY TWO PEOPLE LEFT ON THE FACE OF THIS EARTH.
But you don’t.
You deliberately broadcast what I “should be thinking and saying”. LoL!!
Your fundamental limitation in this life would have to know what soul IS, first.
Being whole as Gatubela had described as — “Untouchable” … IS NOT the thinking of ego entity in the tangible world you praise, defend and believe in. You are baby ego, with a baby soul. Death… IS NOT IN YOUR NATURE. So you will simply never understand LIFE… as I know it, as I feel it, as I understand it among humanity and within the turbulence of my inner-universe.
Regards.;)
“YOU WOULD COMMUNICATE WITH ME LIKE WE WERE THE ONLY TWO PEOPLE LEFT ON THE FACE OF THIS EARTH.”
Good Lord…absolutely…
Hey, Dark Lord
Great post, did I get you on a good day? You were TRUE.
That CAPITAL sentence – I WANT to. You are not LETTING me. Look… Gatubela said recently “Scorpionic energies are a bit more “too heart” and extremely personal.” Well, you never… I should know that. I am Water. Everything I feel and see IS personal to me. EVERYTHING. I can be as placid as an ocean surface on a good day, or as ferocious as the storm – Neptune/Poseidon.
TOTAL EGO hmmmm…. I don’t recall you stating that explicitly before, at least not in those posts I read… A genuine question…. What is total ego distinction? And do you believe you have conquered your ego in the way you understand it? And please don’t tell me I should FEEL it, but since I am a baby soul cum soulless atheist blah blah blah – I will never grasp the magnitude of your greatness (I do. You are). Or we will fight again. Everything is personal, remember? We’ve hogged the forum and turned it into a personal battlefield. Enough already. Be YOU, but let me be ME. I will change when I am ready, not when you WILL me.
In my reply to a very early post 1236 I said, meaning Scorpio men in general “But can we get passed the initial shock of each other’s sensitivities, which feel at times like looking into the mirror?” Can we? Can we stop mirroring each other?
Regards,
Your pea brained, soulless, cowardly, politicized, suppressed, brainwashed, flocked atheist animal;)
(I should make this into my signature, don’t you think?)
“..That CAPITAL sentence – I WANT to. You are not LETTING me..”
No. YOU are not letting you.:)
So you were swept away by the lower self=lust for physical beauty…
Women are not designed that way originally. But they often trade their inner beauty for status, money and security – symbols of nothingness. Yuke… Those are not real. Never have been.
Pluto
Communication…
An honest exchange, without mirroring, without preconceived notions of who the other is and is not. Without ‘personal’. Only really happened once here for me. And those stupid conversations that people have out there… I feel like putting earplugs in and detaching… it is skin crawling…
Materialistic master/slave paradigm…
No ‘keeping up with the Joneses. Striving for material/social standing competition – never held my interest . My mobile phone…. 5 year old Nokia, no laptop (I don’t need one, I built myself a desktop – like tinkering with spares – does the job). No house, but I have a HOME. I only get what I need. I only need what keeps me alive. No labels – still classy, no flash car – still move, no diamonds – still rich. I live it simple in this crazy world.
Scorpio men…
The one who started my crazy search – I’ve let go. No romance – not mine to keep, the protective cloak is still there, despite once in a blue moon e-mail , call or meeting. I wanted to know how a man could make you feel ‘belong’ without uttering a single word on the subject. I wanted to know how I could make a man feel ‘cherished’, without uttering a word either. It is the magic I will never fully understand.
I am not looking now.
Rationality…
I will never part with my rationality. Why… Never mind ‘dreamy’ Pisceans, they ALL poses this rational streak, just talk to them a bit more in depth – if they let you in… Does anyone know what it is like to float on a cushion of emotions ALL THE TIME? Does anyone imagine how it can distort our perception of what IS and what ISN’T? Does anyone have any idea how uncontrollable and intense this can be? Pluto, sweet Pisces Rising. You do. Yes, you have your Scorpionic self-mastery (i.e. iron will). We don’t. Sad, but true. Rationality is OUR tool of control. Rationality is what gives direction and structure to our turbulent and confusing Piscean inner world…
You are right, darling, your path is not my path and never will be. Keep your Freudian Plutonic ‘tool kit’ – I am sorry, but it is no good in MY emotional reality. I am not separating my sentient consciousness (yours) from my sapient one – I need BOTH. What you speak about I’ve known and felt through before. I just have not gained a conscious insight into my soul, but I have one… and believe me – it is not that bad. I may arrive at the same destination as you, but I will take an entirely different route. You will never accept that. The dead end again.
And sweet Pluto… Poseidon is Hade’s brother.
I will miss you, you crazy man
And Gatubela.
My Regards
hehe. lol
Hi Umm,
“My love gun is loaded and she is in my sights…”
“You know what I want….you know what I need”…
Sounds very swoopy!
swoop shwoopy shwoopy shwoopy
Lighten the mood
So much for YouTube embed code….oh well
still got to watch it anyway. i need to work out how to put a vid up so its not just the code too.
cheers
Generally I do not read article on blogs, however I wish to say that this write-up very forced me to try and do so! Your writing style has been amazed me. Thanks, very nice post.
Hi Pilly!
Perhaps you will honour us with a comment or two, while reading?
I have just found out that I have a lilith in scorpio, as well….So that is a sun in Leo, in the eighth house, mercury in leo, in the eighth house, mars in leo, in the eighth house, and this lillith thingy.
ummmm….that explains alot….
And I have my 11th and 12th house thingys in scorpio too…
Satnam, your curiosities asked on 1334.
“..What is the specific direction destined for people who relish living in superficiality?..”
Their direction is one of mortality. Which means a direction of unconsciousness through the dysfunction, control and conformity of the tangible reality seen through THEIR specific myth. That myth is THEIR BELIEF of what “is real” and what their tangible goals and dreams “mean” to them.
“..Are they living like this because they have not questioned…because they have not confronted…because they have not tried to connect?..”
The limitations of ego/personality can question life/us, certainly.. but do those questions PROVOKE THE DESTRUCTION of ones motivations among people for acceptance? Do those limited questions provoke ones coddled creature comforts (reality) to be be perceived by others as smart, as sexy, as successful, as popular, as adored, loved and respected?
Answer in my world: NO. Baby souls are incapable of diving into the depths of their still water. Because their water is “not still” or “not deep” in the first place. A baby soul’s KNOWN understanding of life skims fleetingly along the surface of survival life. Death in that baby adult is UNKNOWN = Mortality. So mortal belief and manifestation in verb… perceives and feels and chooses mortal perception in the dysfunction and heartlessness which only sees the seen, YET cannot solve/transform and become stronger in being through the seen of survival reality. Mortal existence, to a certain extent is on the plane with the animals… but upon deeper thought, I actually feel animals are in touch with the divine (powerful forces abound this universe) innately as instinctual, natural creatures. Versus… the emotional disillusionment and created myths of man and woman to feed ego “happiness” described earlier through tangible achievement.
“..Is their soul’s destiny what they are are living like now (and for the rest of their life) or was it always to connect with the Divine?..”
They are the divine within their purity from the womb until personality/ego reality galvanizes their own dream (separation from darkness and death of psyche)… however baby souls naturally are oblivious to death of personality vice and transformation of lower-animal-self. So baby’s naturally create their separation from immortality (soul eternity) by manipulating, by game-playing and surviving in their relative material existence, with other conformed people and the myriad of activities with which human beings do with each other in “the pursuit of happiness.”
Thank you.
“So baby’s naturally create their separation from immortality (soul eternity) by manipulating, by game-playing and surviving in their relative material existence, with other conformed people and the myriad of activities with which human beings do with each other in “the pursuit of happiness.”
Opportunism… is also the energy (verb) of ubiquitous personality “tricks” in the material, dogmatic, image clad, conformed mind-world of people and their relative surface perceptions. People who know their perceptions of survival and sensual/material riches among other baby souls who do the same unconscious manifestations, are?… Opportunistic… yes, creatures of this earth — > Just like any animal among the animal kingdom is opportunistic out in the wild for their survival. That animal needs to eat… to live. Humans need to eat… to live —> For the deep instinctual motivation of self-interest only (or to feed that of their family, or that of their flock or herd).
An animal-self human… “soul-consciousness” is buried, it’s suppressed…or not found. Non-existent. Mentality tricks and games to deceive others dominates their wacky egg, in order to??… EAT!
“Opportunity” through my universe are intangible gems exhumed through the slaying of personality beasts and diseases (myth) and the transcendence of self-deceit.
This embed code better work!
Ahh! I don’t know how you are embedding videos pluto but, w/e. fuck it
– DJ, go to whichever video you want to show us on Youtube or any other video website.
– So while you’re on the video page you want to show us.. COPY the entire url address in the url bar (hey tech-heads, is url what it’s called?) you know the long box up top where people type stuff like… http://www.thisisplutosgoofyexplanation.com — so copy that field.
Then, PASTE that copied url field into the reply box directly in the reply or comment box you wish to share on this website. Paste it directly inside the post you want to comment on.
Then press Reply as you would normally do without video when sending us that comment here.
There are unique situations DJ where those above instructions don’t work, it’s happened to me on occasion… it might cramp-up when you paste in the url on this site… and no video appears in the post which seems has happened to you above… so I’m sure it’s a technical adjustment somewhere brother.
Dang Pluto Puppy – you’ve been on here debating for 3 years now. That’s some Scorpionic passion u got there. 😉
whoops nevermind…only a year…still impressive.
” on here debating.” LoL…
Hahaha yeah dang it little one, you and your cranky feminine sisterhood wanted to debate till the cows waddle home. It’s all good and in the name of spirited love.
You can’t contain a lively volcano Bella, just bask in his passionate heat, LoL.
Just got my final exam result – 74%..will be a 2:1, good. I will bin all psychology books LOL.. psychological mambo jumbo – doesn’t reflect the real world at all… Common sense concepts expressed in obscure scientific terms… And people make a lifetime career out of writing this. Shambles.
I was wondering..
Whether scorpios are aware of the impact their Hades energy generates on others? Do they know how to deliberately manipulate people with their creepy energies in the silence of the unknown..?
I hate the fact that many of them are sneaky, manipulative liars…someone should listen to the excuses they come up with to mask reality..it’s actually hilarious at times..with all their superior wit and intelligence, I bet they fail to realize that some people can see right through their fabricated versions of reality..
Hi Ines,
“I just have not gained a conscious insight into my soul, but I have one… and believe me – it is not that bad”
Yes, that is the perfect part of you…of all of us. But it won`t mean anything if you don`t feel it for what it truly is…
Or rather, try to not limit it. I know that this is hard to do, but rationalizing it, may just be putting the blinkers on something that you only feel is “not that bad”…
Darn…that´s it? You don´t feel anything more?
Anyone who is not killing people, destroying property or is not a socially defined delinquent, is also considered “not that bad”….
That is, if you want to rationalize.
I know you said that you are pisces and a person who feels…
So, feel your own soul.
Hi Cancer…
Denying the existence of certain energies, in my experiences, is actually the biggest lie that you can actually be participating in. And, actually, not questioning the reasons as to why a person has to fabricate in the first place is actually quite cold. Are you going deeper, or just staying in the surface?
It is what you do with it, that indicates the “quality” or evolution of the person, or, to be more specific, the real truth of how much they LOVE and revere it, through connection with the Divine. If they revere themselves…their energies, I assure you, that the rules change.
The definition of revere? Love, compassion, understanding and with plutonic energies, I am feeling HUMILITY is actually a key thing. It is because of the surrender…it permits you to TRULY perceive these wonderful energies wash over you, for their healing and regenerative powers. That is, once TRUTH has been obtained from “hell”…
A person who loves, will not bring up a little “hell” from their journeys…so perhaps what you are REALLY seeing, is simply, a person who does not LOVE.
You don´t believe me? Well…what is the difference between smothering and true mothering?
For me, smothering is a state that is completely absorbed in self (fears, insecurity) in which everything is centered around a REACTIONARY response that comes out as the child passes these triggers in ya.
What makes a mother? Well that depends on how you perceive what world you want for your children…and nurturing happiness, joy and love.
So Cancer…and I starting to feel a bit of heat when I say this…
Stand up, and take a STAND for yourself!!! Don´t waste time in trying to figure out “the scorpio” guy and his deceit.
Instead, try to figure out, why the heck are you reacting to it, in that way? What is it, in you? Why questions someone´s deceit, but not their “lack of love”?
Actually, no, most people are not able to “see through it”…because most people are only “reacting” and not really seeking the truth of things.
Do they fail to realize? Well you can continue betting…but scorpionic energy goes way beyond being interested in what people think about them.
For the eagles, there are truly, more important things to do…and people usually don´t understand it anyways.
Heart warming post with amazing soul perspective, thank you Gatubela
Nice having you here Miss Pink,
” I was wondering… Whether scorpios are aware of the impact their Hades energy generates on others? ..”
Nope, most are not aware of the damage and abusive neurosis they create in the present breath among people. Why??… Like I have been saying all along… if people believe in the lie OF THE GAME in society… greedy, self-indulgent egotistical Scorpionic energies… are happy participants in that game of life… that illusion. Thus, they DON’T KNOW their Hades energy (in soul) all that person really get’s is a high from all their controlling, obsessive, abusive, manipulative (lying) measures with people and blindly back in on themselves.
They have not killed their toxic ego desires (attachments) to control life and circumstances in others. Their will simply dominates their heart and soul intelligence. Thus they have not found a power, the feeling of a power, far greater than their will and ego creations, which is a mythical obsession (Away from God/Eternity) and not in the current breath with soul. That mind game, it’s reality relishes ‘blissfully Away’ from the higher-power present in the current moment with people.
“..with all their superior wit and intelligence, I bet they fail to realize that some people can see right through their fabricated versions of reality..”
Yes sweetheart. Hubris is transparent. In all signs and natures. People with enough opportunistic awareness, social attractiveness and sexual potency can control the minds and sexuality of other people very easily. Such has been my detesting feelings of the Control games female Scorpios naturally excel at, via their sexual power over males who are weak of sexual power. Conquest over bland males via their animal-self and Ego-Will, dominates good hearted, good intentioned, yet innately weak males. She infiltrates almost all males minds and genitals, so that subtle sexual energy she feels — FULFILLS HER EGO DOMINANCE — and IT IS NOTHING SPIRITUAL. NOTHING.
Male Scorpios do play the same subtle games with women… but they will love, they CAN love with all their heart and soul if they respect that woman who knows herself as an independent, emotionally independent individual. They will appreciate brave honesty, integrity and clarity in that woman, besides her sexual appeal and image.
Wheres female Scorpio nihilism… COULDN’T CARE LESS ABOUT SOUL TRUTH from a male who matches her will and sexual potency. Why??.. because that would MEAN SHE HAS NO CONTROL over the situation. She fails to immortality understand that surrender of her ego desire, and submission of her subtle controlling expressions and tests ARE EXACTLY WHAT SHE NEEDS TO TRANSFORM / TO TRANSCEND HER FEARS. But she doesn’t. She want’s the illusion and game. That keeps her cowardice safe and coddled.
Both male and female Scorpio energy don’t understand their fears and self-deceit. That is fundamentally the first mind-manifestation they fail to see and feel… and solve… and transform.
They behave like everyone else. Opportunistic animals.
Such is the real world.
hmm. mm.yep.
i was thinking today that(as i had gotten caught up in my ego crap) that breakthrough stuff, the upheaval and transformation..its cyclical. and impermanent , like evrything else.thats what it is. fear- and sabotage? maybe. or maybe its just pure survival in a world that is weird and confusing and often stupid. we are stupid. dumb fucking earthlings who think we are so supreme, with our brains and our conquests and etc etcetc.you ever have that feeling where you are walking along the road, pavement concrete that was once raw earth and trees and your feet hurt and you feel tired and nothing matters anymore. today i was in the city and there was just ssoo much crap around me, everywhere i looked it just seemed to get worse, vanity and money and vanity and bling fucking bling. wafts of this perfume and that hairmousse and flicks of hair and collars and pointy shoes and EVERYONE seeming to be revelling in their own self importance and supremacy and all going somewhere amazing and buyng something incredible, on their phones and look at me look at me. my feet seemed to melt into the concrete along with my brain. plus i had eaten too much chocolate mousse which didnt help matters.
all tryng to get somewhere. where? a certain death. that is certain.for it is the curtain which must fall upon us all. certain curtain.
cyclical. surrender , its an action. moving.not static. there is no love without fear, there is no life without death, no up without down, no frown without clown (hehe i just made that up) .dark and light etc etc.blah blah blah. maybe thats what makes it feel so ,,… when it happens.to surrender.the moment of change when all thoughts cease to exist.when fears and ideas and projections cease to exist. anyway it happens when it happens. and that is the purity of it .
Hi Umm,
I know that you are a pretty strong woman, but your comments made me feel certain things, and so, I wanted to write them down. Perhaps they are relevant…
“all tryng to get somewhere. where? a certain death. that is certain.for it is the curtain which must fall upon us all. certain curtain.”
Maybe it is the bouncy leo side, but I don´t feel it that way!
I mean, yeah, I know that I will physically die and I know that I have to “survive”…
It is my motivations that make a difference to me. I have felt that inner drive to succeed, and to have money and material things. But I have also seen the incredible damage that is can do. Why? Because people did not honour the energies that provide this bounty. They just saw it “magically arrive”, and it seems so easy to just “relax” and enjoy not walking the edge. The person who works out of love, is “walking that edge” of striving to go beyond oneself, in connection to the divine. It feels like you are offering yourself to these energies, in absolute humilty. Humility of course, does not go well with anyone nowadays.
Other options exist of course…people striving to go beyond themselves, while abusing the energies of creation. So, yeah…bling! Bling! There is no harmony with ones inner “laws”, no peace obtained for you, by you and for others and by others…
Therefore, essentially, women do not give their energy to their men. They take it for themselves or it dissipates. The fruits of abusing creative energies, are extremely “deathly”.
“that breakthrough stuff, the upheaval and transformation..its cyclical. and impermanent , like evrything else.thats what it is. fear- and sabotage?”
For me, it is impermanent, if not done in love, through connection with the divine. Love is the only energy that sustains itself, within ourselves. It is like having a nuclear reactor in ya! It re-supplies…it grows even more…it brings joy…it sees through pain…it even understands when scorpio goes MIA…(LOL)
“maybe thats what makes it feel so ,,… when it happens.to surrender.the moment of change when all thoughts cease to exist.when fears and ideas and projections cease to exist. anyway it happens when it happens. and that is the purity of it .”
Women do not understand that “how” you surrender is important. You just don´t surrender to yourself…you also surrender to the highest and most purest energy (ies) that you can conceive and align yourself with it. This means, that you “seek” the bestest energies in the universe…for him. If it was love, it will see you to this purity and beauty, as a state of being with in you…
If you are with a guy, the release will be channeling these energies back to him. There is no “wrong” here…he is able to “find life” with it, or he will “find death” with it. It depends on his connection to the divine as well.
yeah there is no wrong.right or wrong. there are polar opposites. law of attraction stuff which is completely natural.which is what i was touchng in before..that natural state of being and flux..everything is impermanant.but wherby one tries to place attachment or judgement onto each movement ,or is out of touch with it, then the control starts through fear of ultimate loss to the thing that it was attached to.everything has a end point.
we used to be nomads. before religion decided we have to stay put and farm and breed and dominate the world.there werent that many people.something came so unstuck.
Hi Gatubela,
“And, actually, not questioning the reasons as to why a person has to fabricate in the first place is actually quite cold. Are you going deeper, or just staying in the surface?”
For me, going deeper in this case is really simple. He likes to manipulate and remain secretive. Sometimes, he just wants to evade the truth that’s right out there, glaring right into his face. Agreed, he doesn’t feel the divinity of love energies that make him act out of vested self-interest.
“Stand up, and take a STAND for yourself!!! Don´t waste time in trying to figure out “the scorpio” guy and his deceit.
Instead, try to figure out, why the heck are you reacting to it, in that way? What is it, in you? Why questions someone´s deceit, but not their “lack of love”?”
Gatubela, I love him through each and every pore of my being. His soul thrives in my body and his heart beats in my mine. Trying to cut the cord and adopting an outsider’s perspective is equivalent to me trying to flee from my body and judging whether it s pretty enough for me to live in.
I react to lies because I like straight-forward, brutal honest people.
Pluto,
Keeping the philosophy behind mind games and controlling scorpionic energy that feeds on abuse and neglect (unevolved scorps) on one side, the impact it leaves behind on true love is extremely depressing…
Things are becoming so hard for me since each passing day..He vibrates in every pulse of my body, and his being and mine has been merged into one..yet on the physical plane, im shivering to death in the coldness of Hades, pleading silently for warmth, with each breathe..I feel like an explosive that has quietly borne the silence for too long…for now, I just want to break through it and confront him face to face..
He has been leading a life of an introvert since the past three months, only recently I see some sparks of life (on his fb profile)…When we meet, all hurt melts away, and a sweet warmth engulfs our presence…but convincing him to meet alone is a task that is equivalent to shifting mountains..I have come too far trying to seek him, any attempt to return back to point zero is impossible…if he dies within me, I die too..we are one…
I think my head is going to burst now.
Miss Pink,
Just ask him what he wants. Does he want to take the next step with you and meet? Your heart needs to learn how ‘to simplify’ intense obstacles in life. Humility through bravery is still and simple and aware. No head explosions needed.
Your mind-energy and motivations are as equally important for him to see and feel in your reality of things. Both of you sound like you’re floating in the abyss. The abyss (or unknown) needs penetrative bravery (simple communication) by both people. Don’t fear rejection. Because I see in your psychology that you are clinging onto wondrous love projections until hell freezes over… which may not be real in the now. You have to be emotionally prepared for the worst oncoming revelations and non-actions in a man.
Bounding your heart and soul to anyone who is not receptive is just building expectations (creations), rather than naturally allowing togetherness to happen. Remember that any relating online between humans is rarely occurring in the present moment. People’s minds drift off in the ‘future’ and create fictional scenarios, and people hold onto ‘past’ fears (thought conditioning) from their known experiences and failures with the opposite sex. So my point here is to help your awareness, in that online relationships are not lived, or died and seen beautifully in the present, as if your naked body were standing still in front of his, breathing controlled, gazing deeply into one another’s soul, with no words, just receiving the feeling of Divine sweeping you both into the moment of passionate love.
Realize this: Both of you, need to show the willingness to merge and connect mutually. Passivity and fear of rejection are your ego-barriers. Break those walls down IF you want clarity and truthful understanding. Dissolve ego-creation. Ask him what’s holding him back from taking you out and sweeping you off your little feet.
Willingness. A very important energy.
A cracking post. No fear of rejection. I have only recently learned that one, and it applies to EVERY relationship, not just romantic ones. Ask honest questions to get honest answers. So simple, yet so scary for people…
Pluto,
It is not an online relationship..He was with me in high school and we were friends initially with a sound understanding and warmth for each other..we became too close, and then the friendship took a romantic turn as a result of which he suddenly turned cold on me and everyone else..he has been a different person since then…
Distances are creating barriers since he is away for college in another country..we do meet up when he hits the native soil during vacations..but this time, I plan to confront him bluntly when he comes…I get a feeling that something is holding him back that prevents him from admitting his feelings for me…It’s hard to extract that reason when the person is not willing to accept his feelings in a first place..he is living in denial and that prevents our relationship from progressing beautifully…he does not walk his talk…This makes it difficult for me to ask direct questions…
we know that we kick off together and he accepts that I understand him…. yet he does not want to accept this on my face (told my friend once and then forbade her from telling me which she did)…It’s one mess…
Btw, im just 21 yet learning the lessons that people learn in their 40s..Today, I decided to surrender to God’s love instead of trying to ‘snatch’ my desires from the universe..’By letting it go, it all gets done. When you try and try, the world is beyond the winning’
I feel better now 😀
Hi Cancer,
So many things in your post are not important as to what LOVE is…
The game you are playing will depend on the rules you are making. So…stop making rules and let things flow and deal with HIM and YOU as the truth manifests.
Love for me, is bringing two people bringing eachother into their hearts …and loving them. Getting to know them…and wanting them to get to know you. Meaning, you want to know every little molecule and atom of their being, and you want them to get to know your molecules and atoms too!!!
If it is based on truth…even the “bad” parts can be loved…because love sees it all as ONE. You can balance eachother out through DIRECT facing of the ROOT energies, and not the physical manifestation of them.
So, his fears, blocking intimacy will be faced soulfully, truthfully and bravely…hopefully, he does the same with yours.
The reasons for our complex behavior will usually stem from something very simple, and then we mentally snowball it to an avalanche and incredible proportions (polarizing it and SEPARATING it). However, seeing the root of FEAR as embedded in his soul, is easier to LOVE.
It is not the other person´s fault they polarized certain aspects of themselves…as long as both can love, it will grow.
Trusting your inner guidance, means that love is an INTERNAL experience…
Its ok to loose him…but do you even truly know what you lost? True intimacy is when love goes beyond yourself and blesses you with the divine…and you bless eachother with this wonderful energy.
Strangely, I have witnissed that feminine energies are very different than masculine energies.
I don´t see much of these learning experiences in your comments…but that is only my opinion.
BTW only the pure (even your sexuality must be pure and not to be used to manipulate the guy…and make him fall) can walk through pluto´s gates….so it helps that you mentally feel this plutonic energy as a separate part of yourself….and test yourself every day, if you are still worthy to pass.
I don’t use ‘flowery’ language… Feelings to me are just beyond description and better FELT in my reality, rather than spoken of, lest written about… Got e-mail from Scorpio. All business, campaign related stuff, which has now turned into a multimillion pound project. And one phrase in the end… ‘I am still here for the foreseeable future’. I smile and think to myself ‘I know’. He just IS. Without his invisible protective arms I wouldn’t have found courage within myself. There would be no campaign and no achievable good. Unknowingly he has given me trust through who he is. He is the ‘evolved’. In the turbulences of my later search I was able to check against the high standard he had set. I have no ‘want’. No ‘intent’. No ‘attachment’. No ‘words’. We will never fall in – not mine to keep. And we will never fall out. A paradox. And it feels…divine.
“..I have only recently learned that one, and it applies to EVERY relationship, not just romantic ones…”
O recently yeah… where and who taught you that?
Hades has never stated relationships are “just” romantic. Life is people. People are relationships. Relationships are life. Someone’s posts read a muddled duck. Hey smile.. before you were grubby Gretchen… now you’re freshly f*cked Persephone. LoL!
How does it feel?.. LoL
“…Without his invisible protective arms I wouldn’t have found courage within myself..”
Sounds like quite a bloke… Invisible arms hey?… well now, If he can catch your fall when you trip (and you have mastered tripping)… imagine his catching skill when you clumsily fall giddy while walking right beside him?
“And it feels…divine.”
Is that so little trouble maker!?… Weren’t you the testy one who shouted logically from the rooftops that Atheism rocks!?… I do recall responding to your flat feats of logic and memorized textbook life experience. Those textbooks really don’t know how to love an Eagle, eh?
The fireplace is burning curtains for your psyche books. Up in smoke they go… a fitting destiny for them.
Acres of bunnies and flowery regards.
and here we go looking like its back on again.. batten down the hatches.. fuuuuckk.
Hi Ines,
Sounds like you have a very nice eagle.
Always remember that people struggle daily with themselves…and while they are struggling, they will oscilate. f a person is trying to get over attachment to lowerself, this oscilation will be from lower ego energies to higher divine energies. All of these will start coming out.
The only way you will see the truth of your eagle, is if you are connected to your own soul energies…and if you are brave enough to accept the truth, love and healing is nearby.
Honestly, some lower natures just prefer the “I can leave any time I want clause” through ambiguous unknowns and manifestations of their DESIRES as a way of SURVIVAL, based on strong external life experiences imposed on them – and were not even of their making.
Those scorpionic life and death energies know that the only way to end this oscilation is literally, to get off the wheel of attachment to ourselves, and surrender to the divine.
So…don´t forget to love him and his soul FIRST and dying in those invisible arms second.
You need to be in tune as to the core energies from him, that offer those arms in the first place. Dt let those great arms distract you from his amazing journey and soulful beauty.
The first two times we met I was too hyped up to notice… He later said ‘I saw someone with passion. And vision’. Third time… He sat himself in the chair opposite and… looked me straight in the eye. Not at me, but INTO me. There was a question there ‘Who ARE you?’ I knew it instantly. And thought ‘Hang on……. Who are YOU?’
For two years I was tormenting myself by not accepting the truth of reality…Desire, imaginary ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’, constant internal dialogue, played out scenarios in my head…. that lower self… Kept under lock and key. I tried to label it… a ‘crush’, a ‘business’ relationship, a ‘friendship’, my ‘imagination’… I’ve done it all, huh…
We have never lied to each other, from the start. But I know I lied to myself by creating an ‘alternative’ reality… And he lied to himself too… I ‘read’ it in him… his gesture – he was annoyed with himself for accepting my unexpressed illusion… his embarrassed glance – feeling what I was feeling… his short sentence – temptation to meet without any legitimate reason… his happy voice on the phone – allowing non-business calls… my ‘good bye’ kiss on the cheek – and a wave of happiness from him… I was physically hit by it. An unspoken tango.
It is different now. You are right, Gatubela, I have ‘cried’ in his ‘invisible arms’ without loving him first. Now I have ‘died’ in them. Without words we owned up and have changed. He knows. I know. I will never belong to him in the ‘normal’ sense. But I have surrendered to who he is. To his truth. It is more beautiful and more honest now. And no pain.
Hi Ines,
I want to explain to you what it means when you feel your own plutonic energies. You have to want to seek them out as a priority in your life, because they will have such an effect on you. You mentioned that you have your neptune in pluto?
If you can´t see your own “pluto” then you are under its effects. And honestly, most of what you will be saying will be because of your surrender to your own desires and ego.
You only can see your own energies through soul wrenching, mind searing, heart burning VIRTUE. If you don´t strive to overcome your own plutonic energies, through truth and virtue, you will be under its effect. When you work on YOU….you release yourself from the poison of pluto. Or rather…you polarize the blindness to TRUTH, through loving SOUL energies.
Pluto (the planet) expects you to confront it and seek its / your truth, with your soul and not your ego.
The blindness will change to enlightenment…and the planet´s energies become healing and regenerative.
So, literally, I feel these energies as almost a soulful “guiding light” and not a ego poisonous blindess and entrapment in its seductive, hypnotic and sensual “I know your deepest and darkest desires” knowledge.
So…if evolved scorpio is actually evolved scorpio….her “pluto” will be detached from her as well – separate.
She is no longer under its effects…meaning detachment of ego and flowing fluidly with the divine, seeking truth by surrendering only to love and not to “desire.”
Why do you not try to SEPARATE the pluto from your desires? It has a message for you, if you are brave enough to face it.
Facing pluto with your soul, permits the blessing of truth. I imagine, that the most important thing for me, is when I see, with my soul, that someone has their pluto detached from them as well. I can see their battles clearly.
You have not done any of the soul work Ines.
Hi Gatubela,
I feel your sincerity in trying to help me… and I don’t believe it is EVER going to happen… why…
It has NOTHING to do with disposing of one’s rational self… You see Pluto went through intense search for answers by READING and REFLECTING on whatever event(s) had started his search. Plus his natural propensity to feel and probe beyond what is ‘seen’. You too had years of hell… EXTREME experiences, leading to catharsis leading to revelation = GOD (LOVE) descends and enters you… For the majority of people, including those who stalk this forum and innocently ask about ways of flowing into the Divine – it will never happen. Including myself. I am simply not born this way… I too had bad experiences, but there is a difference… you mentioned before that you saw the DAMAGE you could do to others… and that was the turning point… Pluto too, in his own way, was doing the damage in the past. I don’t believe I did… I just don’t have it in me… Long time ago a friend of mine at the time (female Scorpio) said to me ‘You are not like me… you don’t have a single malicious bone in your body.’ You see that inner INNOCENCE has always kept me from creating REAL DAMAGE to others… I said somewhere before I am the LIGHT… Sure, everyday interactions with others are not always peaceful, and it would be a lie to always have it that way. But no, damage… in the real sense of it… People I have been involved with choose to stay in touch with me, including my ex lovers, so maybe I haven’t really damaged them.
Many find GOD (LOVE) ONLY after they went through a dramatic life experience… They could have been die hard atheists, or agnostics, or simply what is referred to ‘without faith’, i.e. didn’t give a s*** about any spiritual aspect. And when this transformation takes place within them – they don’t necessarily join any established religion. No need. They just BECOME. Were they ‘baby souls’? Or were they just lucky (or unlucky, depending how one views it) to be SLAMMED by life to an extent when EVERYTHING and ANYTHING stopped making sense? Enormous grief, pain, suffering which led to… letting go of anything that is not cosmically significant. Transcending to a different reality where one finds peace within. A QUALITATIVE change. Not everyone with an extreme experience will change. Maybe, those are the ‘baby souls’… And I am that ‘baby soul’ from birth… through my innocence… I am not saying it will always be that way, we never know what is out there waiting for us.
I have a friend… A quiet Capricorn man, and you wouldn’t think he carries within himself THIS… Some years back he had a massive brain injury after a motorcross accident: weeks in a coma – miraculously, he not only survived, but went back to ‘normality’ aside from minor LTM problems. BUT he CHANGED. He knew the change in himself too and went in search for answers. He feels IT within. You see – THAT is what it took for him to FEEL it. For me talking to him is like having found a long lost brother. He finds it hard to describe, no surprise, can anyone give LOVE a definition? Greeks have FOUR words for that…
I am not here to force a transformation… I am here because there are people here who look beyond their physical reality… because there isn’t really anyone in my world who can identify with SEARCHING, none of them are searching for anything… it is suffocating. Mentioning these kind of conversations would make them… embarrassed, of all things… Their understanding of anything spiritual is very limited, leave alone FEEL it.
I don’t believe in the CREATOR. This makes me an atheist. I do believe in LOVE. My understanding of what love is – has changed. But if you think I feel it in the same way you do – no. I cannot even imagine what it is that you feel… is it physical? Some ‘tingling’ sensation? Some physical warmth? Some burning light? Or is it some altered state of consciousness? What is it? I don’t know. Please understand that people like yourself and Pluto are an exception, not the rule… the rest will just carry on struggling with those questions… or not even asking. So Pluto was right again. But at least I have asked. I will not torture myself for who I am, that’s for sure. I like myself that way now, after years of NOT liking me. And my mission is not to change others…
There… as sincere as I could be… You see Scorpio men seem to love this innocence of mine… except now I am not as innocent as to not KNOW their darkness, when in the past I just felt it, but didn’t know why… maybe this is what makes it such a good balance: my light + their dark… Sure I can put up a battle, but I am just as happy to step aside when I feel it is the right thing to do. I don’t know, just seems to flow naturally… But as I said I am not looking now.
I really do appreciate you trying to give me what you have yourself… it cannot be forced, and maybe cannot even be ‘worked on’ if one hasn’t reached that stage in their evolution…
Hug
Hi Ines,
“you mentioned before that you saw the DAMAGE you could do to others… and that was the turning point”
Yes…but not in the way that you insinuate. I actually wanted to know “what I did not know”…as I knew deep down, that my own inner knowledge – rationality was incomplete.
Therefore, I sought out a state of being that “knows”….As I did not have my own inner guidance developed, I surrendered to my lack of it…This made it seem that I could not “trust” anything, and the truth be told, it was like everything I knew was “not knowledge”. I can´t explain how rather traumatic this experience was…
Everything I “was”…actually “wasn´t”…So, rationalizing was actually useless for my very own survival. So..I became “nothing”. This moment was earth shattering. Why? Because when rationality disappears, you enter into a STATE of being…you feel your own emotions.
So imagine what I felt…I came face to face with ME…my emotional make-up, my strengths, my darkness, my light, my lack of truth in essence. I knew that I was not ready to face the eternal, because what I saw in myself was very “mortal” and unstable.
Ines, no one will really have as a turning point, the good they perceive in themselves…what will happen when you see your own soul energies, is that you will feel TRUTH and RAWNESS as to the exact nature of “YOU”…
“You see that inner INNOCENCE has always kept me from creating REAL DAMAGE to others… I said somewhere before I am the LIGHT”
Hmmm….Jesus said that too…”I am the light”…
His “rational” seems a bit different from yours, though. He died in order to change the current “light” of this world, according to the “book”.
My experiences compell me to say that you are reflecting the current “light” of man, but not anything beyond that.
This world is not that great that we have to accept being at peace with it…and claim innocence as to what is really going on.
Hi again Ines,
“I don’t believe in the CREATOR. This makes me an atheist”
Hmmm….but you don´t want to rationalize what exactly is creation? I mean…”How did “you” happen?
I once proved that a higher order does exist through Cartesian logic, just for fun and because I wanted too.…it was a while back though.
I feel that you have not even explored the POWER of logic, when used to seek TRUTHES and not passively justify “what someone said to you.” It can be very transformative.
So, in truth, you don´t believe in the creator, but according to society , you are an atheist. Have you considered, what you are…”TO YOU”? Hmmm…maybe you are a monster…and don´t know it!!!
A+B = C? So answer the question…
A: I don´t believe in the Creator
B: This makes me an atheist
And C equals what Ines? I sure hope the answer is not “I have innocence.”
“maybe this is what makes it such a good balance: my light + their dark”.
No…you have failed to understand the nature of their darkness…and what it means…to you.
For me, the darkness indicates their light…the inner balance achieved by a person. Look at the yin and yang symbol. We have a bit of both in us, but when we are with a guy, one will predominate through our innate and soulful sexuality. Not the lustful kind!! LoL! So…I don´t feel that darkness and light can be separated between two people. It must be joined and merged as one. With the guys permission of course. The dark must always be respected…and you must always be soulful.
This provides the complete journey of two souls…and it is the honest and truthful map of their universe. And it won´t be pretty!!! Why? Because the truth is, we misbehaved at one time(s) during our evolution.
We can´t deny that because we are “innocent” now, that we were actually innocent before we realized our own divinity? What is your comparison to innocence? Scorpionic darkness? What will you do when faced with a priest? A monk? A holy guru? You will be the dark one!!!
I mean…come on!!!
Creation requires it to be that way. The differences…the similarities…the lightning…the electricity…the magnetism…light a spark to that…those essential goody ingredients of You and Him, mixed with love..and the accepting the lessons that it took to get you there.
Merging is his and your light and dark as one, not separate.
Hi Ines,
Also, you have to know your own darkness to understand what it is…
Darkness is the energy that absorbs your stuff that ain´t light. It accepts these things for a while…It is where you store your energy. So when you face your own darkness you are learning to face your own fears and cosmic unknowns that are special to “YOU”. Your bad days, your pain, your scars and your fears. What the heck are you doing with “those”? Hmmmmm????
What? How can you relate innocence as light? I relate innocence to intolerance and blindness.
Oh…are we talking about purity? LoL!!! Please, your purity can only be “validated” once you enter “Where you store your pain…and fear…where your darkest desires are stored and all of your inner meanies”. And come out feeling self-sustaining, nuclear fusion and fission reacting love inside of you..
You will know when you are pure, when the dark and light FEEL the SAME!!! One is just more denser or more quiet…but the soulful effect is the same on ”YOU”. They both feel divine. So, it means nothing that you still insist on separating.
I have said that what is not soulfully ours to take, must be soulfully, and without fear, LOVED. So when you separate your “light whatever you think it ain´t” and his “dark”…you are mixing your superiority controlling intolerance to what is his “suffering, battles and DIVINITY acquired through balancing, if he is evolved”…
When you see his darkness, it must be seen with your soulful light (not innocence because innocence is not interested in the truth)…and treated as you would your own darkness. So…love (surrender to the divine), truth, patience, compassion, understanding, being determined and consistent in my faith, jumping blindly off the cliff, and not caring about the consequences, feeling GOD, and trusting my own energies, and loving as if this day were my last…are things that healed me. Yup…understanding plutonic energies, once polarized into heartful love, is healing and regenerative.
So a pure union is when you can face his “darkness”, as you accepted yours and transform it to a divine energetic space.
“..you mentioned before that you saw the DAMAGE you could do to others… and that was the turning point… Pluto too, in his own way, was doing the damage in the past. I don’t believe I did… I just don’t have it in me.”
More crafted and adopted stage politics.
Yeah, you’re perfect. Lest us not forget your amazing capacity to love, of which you said so humbly –… ” You see that inner INNOCENCE has always kept me from creating REAL DAMAGE to others… I said somewhere before I am the LIGHT…”
Hey blind one. Any “Damage” from me has transformed your pear perceptions. That damage is not seen or promoted as virtue through your opportunistic filters.
The Light. Where is it!? Where is YOUR SOUL awareness?? You’re a dim Taker among animal games, AND FAR FROM INNOCENT amid relational energy. Had anyone else written separatist encyclopedia characterizations about HOW AWARE they are, I would tell them the same thing. Politicians are opportunists. Opportunists hide cowardly. The quiet opportunist is described through your psychology of the written word.
Nothing from your heart being is prevalent nor GIVES us the Light. You TAKE LIGHT — THEN you STEAL THAT SOUL-INSIGHT AS IF YOU BREATHE IT by virtue of your own money hungry experiences. Politicians hide the Truth. They emit lies. And they emit those blind entities in wave after wave of suppressed wave, as a leech would get comfortable on skin thirsting for nutrient blood in another.
It’s very simple Innes. You minimize the scope of what love IS by not demonstrating that you have evil in yourself. You choose to take the manifestation of others Truth, then NARRATE YOUR LACK just as Sir David Attenborough characterizes his relative promotional entertainment of animal nature. You are not the verb of your hypocritical nouns. YOU TAKE in life… and the Eagle you work with?… HE TAKES too. Birds of a flocking feather.
Innes, to me you sound really up yourself.and yeah like pretending to be clueless i order to get attention just so you can pretend to be clueless again.
Hi Ppuppy,
I hope you stick around as well! What you are sharing here is beautiful. Reading and feeling each of your comments gives a very good insight into Scorpio man’s life (The Eagle). Including your battles 😉 hmmm… your intent is soulful and loving. From my view over here… you are just inviting to discover where the power source is…. 😉
…You deserve the very best a male Scorpio can inject into you…
I’m humbled … thank you…
Inject into you?… (lol) This reminds me of the scene from the Breaking Dawn movie when Bella died while giving birth to Renesme. Edward injected a syringe full of vampire venom trying to change her into a vampire to save her life. That doesn’t work. So he started biting her all over her body. Then we see Edward’s venom taking effect on Bella, there are whole bunch of flash backs going on with her brain which are clips from all 4 movies. Then she slowly transformed from human into a fantastically beautiful “Vampire”.
For me that scene is like the phoenix rising from the ashes through scorpionic transformative energy.
I will share more about my Scorpio journey. Best journey yet!!
The Bull is just working reallll hard lately…
Ps. Btw Pluto where does Saturn sit in your chart? Do you have planets in your libra?
Love,
Mari
“Reading and feeling each of your comments gives a very good insight into Scorpio man’s life (The Eagle). Including your battles”
ESPECIALLY the battles… every punctuation mark, turn of phrase, mood of response… give more insight, more so than the words within. They are the equivalent of eyes, gestures, facial expression, tone of voice in real life. Cool huh…
My best friend is the Bull:) Steady and soulful.
Regards
Hmmm….I was thinking about that ET song….but I prefer this one more: It is called Aguila sideral. This band is Chilean, so you will hear Andean culture also associated with Macchu Picchu in Peru. Sorry for the wierdness about it, the space stuff is really a story from there.
Space eagle, vineyard of mist
Lost bastion, blind sabre
Space eagle.
Starry belt, solemn bread (leaf)
Mineral serpent, stone rose
Essential mountain chain, marine roof
Dome of silence, pure count
Bunch of salt, cherry tree of black wing
Silver wave, direction of time
Space eagle, Andean serpent
Space eagle, moon of quartz
Space eagle, ocean bride
Space eagle
Hi Umm!!!
Another beautiful song by this Chilean Band…It is called “The Powerful Death”… (And I recommend their music…especially “todos juntos” and “mira niñita”…LoL)
The powerful death
What of man? In which part
Of his open conversation
Between the warehouses and the whistles,
In which of his metallic movements
Lived the indestructible,
The everlasting, life?
Everyone lost heart
While awaiting their death,
Their daily show of death:
And their fateful breaking
Every day was…
Like a black drink
They drank…trembling
Then on the earthly ladder i have climbed
Then on the earthly ladder i have climbed
Between the atrocious morning of the lost jungles
Until you… Machu-Picchu
Tall city of the climbing stones,
finally
dwelling of what the land
didn’t hide
in the sleeping clothing
in you, like two parallel lines,
the cradle of the lightning flash and of the human being
they were rocking in a wind of thorns
mother of stone,…foam of the condors
Tall reef of the human dawn.
When the clay-coloured hand
Was converted into clay,
And when the small eyelids
closed
full of rouge walls,
inhabited by castles,
and when all the man
got tangled up in his hole,
the wooded accuracy was left:
in the tall place of the human dawn:
the tallest vessel
that contained the silence
a life of stone
After so many lives.
Beautiful, Gatubela…. “everyone lost heart while awaiting their death”….
Yes, the song deals with the loss of souls (the divine energies are seated in the heart) and selling them to concrete Gods.
However, how incan culture is not very pleasant in various aspects. They also lost heart too it seems.
thanks..
why did this thing have to get so preachy and pretentious..
Who exactly is pretentious? .. and Preachy?… Why would you keep reading and involving yourself with this specific forum if those two perceptions unsettle you?
Facebook, Twitter, they are pretentious and meaningless. Know the different energy Umm.
poo to you too pluto. i know the different energies .. mutually real.. well ur right its just the internet.
it just annoys me that this thing.. that yes you innes are putting other people on pseudo pedestals and gatubela you are being preachy probably without meaning to, i know you have a good heart. innes you shit me, i know u have been through crap but i dont see you as honest.you werent very nice to me, felt disrespected by you.you just barged on in stomped on people particularly me. pluto you are just shitted off. yeah so am i. i know about energy and truth.
Hi Umm,
I was told that the moon is in Gemini today!
moon in gemini huh. well that must explain things then!pfft. hehe.certainly something going on. anyway im going. ciao
Hi Gatubela,
I didn’t insinuate, I wrote it exactly how you expressed it before, which doesn’t imply that you did do damage. Sorry if it came across that way. I understood it as you being close to doing it and finding it within yourself to see what it could have been, if done?
“I don´t feel that darkness and light can be separated between two people. It must be joined and merged as one. With the guys permission of course. The dark must always be respected…”
I understand this, Gatubela. It would happen during the course of a relationship when the journey is taken together. What I meant was that initial stage when the two just met, that first thing that attracts both to one another…
Here is the confusing thing… Do you know that from the moment I posted my first comment to maybe half way through me being on here I spent most of my time trying to understand what was MEANT by the phrases used on here? And still find it confusing at times because it seems to change from context to context. For instance, you say “Darkness is the energy that absorbs your stuff that ain´t light”. So… just to clarify… In the context of this conversation… do you mean:
Dark (Darkness)= negative energy
Light = positive energy
And further:
Negative/positive energy = any intent, motivation, action, feeling, emotion
Is that what you understand by those? It’s like I need a little vocabulary to accompany the journey on this forum. If one is not the physicist one wouldn’t know what ‘super symmetry’ means to physicists, huh… I know I should have asked this before, but all that fighting took away from the real thing.
I will then read your comments again.
Thank you
Gatubela, I feel that you are genuinly trying to help me understand, even when I have given up on myself. But reading those comments from….registerus666@gmail.com if you feel like you have time and patience. I won’t be on here again.
Thank you
Hmmm….you were on again,
Well, this is something that is also coming from my experiences. Perhaps you can work with me in this one….
Where do you feel you “store” your bad experiences, if you are striving to actually deal with them through truth and divinity?
How do you define your sexuality? Am not an expert here, but I feel that with you, it is important.
And lastly, how do you “rationalize” what you want in a man?
Hi Ines,
Again, things that I picked up with my experiences…so they are personal. I hope that you understand it that way, and feel that you have to feel yourself. Your situation is much different than mine.
Darkness for me, is our energy…and we contaminate our own energy by our own disharmony with it.
How?…in a basic sense, we place our negativity there, by denying it, fearing it and therefore blocking it…by lies, and lack of truth. In a greater sense, we violate certain energetic laws. So, the concept of karma can be placed here..
So simply put, the reason truth releases us, is because we clear our energetic source (darkness) through facing it. We make it soulful, divine and beautiful again.
So, we feel our souls as they should have been in a pure state.
For women and men, I have felt their shame reactions of their own sexuality placed here too. Meaning, what we are attracted to, can be “taboo” in terms of dualistic energies. Dualism prevents us from seeing what our sexuality really is.
I suppose you can imagine the implications of what I have just said? Why we don´t change, why we are souless? We actually prevent ourselves from feeling higher more powerful energies, and content ourselves to blinding, mind palying ego games. Can you imagine the feeling anything “divine” has to this limitation of ours? I did.
Light is how we deal with our darkness. How we view it and yes, it can be rational. It is Ego. You are an atheist so it is hard to really explain more to it, unless you do the soulwork.
However, an illuminated ego, is different than a rigid one. A fluid ego has stablized and balanced their darkness through facing themselves. I have mentioned that love is a good way to go in there…and come out! Once you face yourself, balance is obtained and you feel the connection to the source.
So…the truth is, anything that you have said here, without dealing with yourself first, is actually a limitation of who you truly are.
Your sense of power and self has been consolidated there it seems.
“and the Eagle you work with?… HE TAKES too. ”
YOU take, darling… you take the energy of people on here to feed your TOTAL EGO. Don’t assume about someone you have never spoken to and don’t know. DON’T DARE.
Take care
This whole forum is a question of Service to humanity. Not personal belief. Not “assumption”. The pure distinction from you and I?
I desire to give of me, ALL OF ME, to serve others through soul. Because I know soul.
You desire to separate yourself, and “sensible campaigns” just as ego superbly does among other egos in the real world. Because you know ego limitation and the payoff of taking.
You take care.
My soul is invincible.:)
“and the Eagle you work with?… HE TAKES too. Birds of a flocking feather.” “Not “assumption”.
Not assuming much, huh? DON’T you even go there.
“sensible campaigns” ???????????
I am trying to find out things for myself, and YOU are not bloody helping.
Having said that – you will be mightly bored without me here… he-he…. who else to ‘manipulate’ as you yourself admitted prior. You NEED that, darling, it’s part of who you are. And guess what… once upon a time I was on the receiving end of a Scorpio manipulation… I do have a pretty good idea of how it works. Even this last post of yours – is manipulating, darling:)
You said yourself I will never understand your truth… I agree TO A POINT… let me understand what I can, you egotistic maniac. So just shut up and let me talk to Gatubela if she agrees to.
And if you want brownie points for all the WORK you have done with me – not yet.
Geez… how can TOTAL EGO be so immature…
“..Geez… how can TOTAL EGO be so immature…”
Because Total Ego is not literal human ego. The totality of my ego is A SPECK of dust IN RELATION to the omni-power, present energy felt of the Source of this Universe. My total ego is insignificant in the scheme of this Universe. And so is your literal jab.
“…let me understand what I can, you egotistic maniac. So just shut up and let me talk..”
Hahaha. Soulless creatures are so literal and scared. They interpret a real genuine revelation from another, and contort it into their own bubble of what words mean. Hahaha. No person here is “not letting” you talk— afraid one. You are the Light right? The light does not need the Judge’s permission or OK to present a sensible campaign. Literal reality in person amuses me, it’s limitation of soul. Do forgive.
This is what I associate with Scorpio men effect he-he… From Rabbit Hearted girl to the Lion Hearted one. Great lyrics.
Hi Again Ines,
So….P.Puppy has total ego?
No…you are extremely ignorant. Ego is how we view our “darkness”…how we battled ” it”…how we purified it…and the truthes we learned and BECAME-
You will never understand this Ines..
You see only the surface…
…Plus, an Eagle must eat too. Yes, he eats… bunnies, goats, sheep, lambs and rodents, even wolves and young cattle.
So that means Eagle Soul is A NATURAL KILLER, meaning a part of survival between us in physical human terms/reality… but he IS NOT ‘OF’ that human game he sees and feels intensely scurrying around and manipulating on the ground level. There is THE LITERAL ground game of human survival. And then there is THE SOUL consciousness of what that game is and means on deep, occult levels.
The Eagle’s heart/mind vision and warrior spirit among slugs and parasitic, poisonous energies is what ordained him that eternity in human flesh in the first place.
Eagles are not eagles as a result of material conquest only. Hahahaha!!. They are simply “more talented” opportunistic members of the ground game of survival. Nothing “impermanent” about their reality at all.;)
You want me to stay on the forum, Pluto.
It’s very late here… why do I even bother…
Take care
Hello! Good Morning on a Saturday!!
Hmmm…. Let’s lighten up the mood for a while and let off some steam.
Here’s some loving….
Hi Lovemari,
1389 is not forgotten. Your comment here is a highly astute and sophisticated heart perception you gave here on the forum regarding me, thank you……
“..From my view over here… you are just inviting to discover where the power source is….”
Oh yeah. You bet ya! The power I yield is ‘not mine’ to begin with. That real power you remarkably understand… is nothing, nothing… as wealthy, famous, narcissistic, class and race prejudice, self-created walking myths BELIEVE the “power” which they “think” they are in this flash of physical life. They are just mortal, in soul.
Your understanding of the real source of power tells my soul you are an old soul in your own right… because you are feeling, have felt… the possible depth and intensity of being we are as people beneath the surface rubble of image, class, and pretense.
Regarding Breaking Dawn the movie you mentioned:
“..Edward injected a syringe full of vampire venom trying to change her into a vampire to save her life. That doesn’t work. So he started biting her all over her body..”
Yes. There are many occult symbols, very meaningful symbols to saturate your emotions with in that movie as there are in a bunch of other films I recommend viewing ‘to be a part of the Eagle’s world’.
He (Edward) bit her, as the literal symbol of? — Transformation.
Transformation from what, the laymen asks??
He transformed her ‘Death’ of her old, meaningless, suffocating, disillusioned ego riddled world ‘normally happening’ and going nowhere within her SOUL reality with people. Family and friends who ‘did not understand her real difference’. In essence, She (Bella) felt like a pariah… very much similar to how I felt inside amid the world of people for many years until my 30th birthday.
Death of her old-self was “the Freedom” she had been yearning for.
“..Then she slowly transformed from human into a fantastically beautiful “Vampire”..
Yes. Her laser-red eyes are actually symbolic of “the Lower-self” DESIRES… or power of desire to control and dominate and manipulate other innocent souls for intense self-indulgent gain only. Dim, superficial, lusty, greedy, uncaring, sensual-seeking animal-self Pluto/Scorpio type people, are people who manifest energies within that level of being — they are HIGHLY DESTRUCTIVE forces of nature (personality) SUBCONSCIOUSLY taking hold of that person… or taking over their mind-will and heart-soul intelligence. In other the words… “the force” IS NOT WITH them. Their ego-creations and self-deceit are fighting against them. Thus “the force” is not with them. They have not killed ego ‘yet’.
So that’s why the evil vampires in that movie have red eyes. The Higher-mind, Higher-soul Cullen’s have transformed their Vice of self created ego-myth, torment and insidious abuse among “humans” to leverage their existence among human limitation with LOVE, TRUTH, and VIRTUE. So their laser-eyes are symbolized like eagle itself… shining gold or yellow in color.
The evil, lower animal power thirsty ‘desire’ is illustrated by the Voltaire’s MOTIVATION TO CONCEAL TRUTH… thus they cannot LOVE period… they can only abuse the power they were gifted, thus they “hurt” and “take advantage of” innocent human beings. Their characters are symbols and representations of THE REAL WORLD in terms of people in positions of financial power, authoritarian positions, ABUSE their power. Hence the reality of exorbitant greed, self-interest, calculation and oppression on a collective level. Many are not even wealthy. This lower, dark manifestation happens on all levels of socioeconomic society everywhere. Even civilized Persephones abuse the Love energy, thanks to toxic, indifferent, and disillusioned males “injecting” that crap into them in the first place.
The conformed mind and heart believes whole-heatedly what is fed to them on a literal level. Most people are too afraid to question their pain and dysfunction in their respective relating experiences. They just accept and survive.
Pluto’s recommended flick list:
1) 300
2) V for Vendetta
3) The Notebook
4) The Twilight Movies
5) Star Wars Trilogy
6) UnderWorld Trilogy
7) Inception
8) War of the Roses
9) Buried Alive
10) Black Death
Watch em people. Understand their deeper message, hidden message. They’re not all sexy and fun, but it will broaden your scope of death and eternal life.
Damn, video owner disabled the embedding feature… Anyway, Florence and the Machine ‘The Rabbit Hearted Girl’ – a Scorpio man and how he affects you…. at least that’s what I absolutely associated this song with from my ‘travels’ he-he… I love the passion of the music and the lyrics…
The looking glass, so shiny and new
How quickly the glamour fades
I start spinning, slipping out of time
Was that the wrong pill to take? (Raise it up)
You made a deal, and now it seems you have to offer up
But will it ever be enough? (Raise it up, raise it up)
It’s not enough (Raise it up, raise it up)
Here I am, a rabbit hearted girl
Frozen in the headlights
It seems I’ve made the final sacrifice
We raise it up, this offering
We raise it up
This is a gift, it comes with a price
Who is the lamb and who is the knife?
Midas is king and he holds me so tight
And turns me to gold in the sunlight
I look around, but I can’t find you (raise it up)
If only I could see your face (raise it up)
Instead of rushing towards the skyline (raise it up)
I wish that I could just be brave
I must become a lion hearted girl
Ready for a fight
Before I make the final sacrifice
We raise it up, this offering
We raise it up
This is a gift, it comes with a price
Who is the lamb and who is the knife?
Midas is king and he holds me so tight
And turns me to gold in the sunlight
Raise it up, raise it up
Raise it up, raise it up
And in the spring I shed my skin
And it blows away with the changing wind
The waters turn from blue to red
As towards the sky I offer it
Hi Gatubela
Thank you for answering, yes, I was on again… Why… went out last night which I rarely do, and knew again why… Meaningless conversations, I couldn’t participate just sat back observing people… someone asks what I am up to, and I reply this and that and… souls searching. Conversation stops ‘Soul searchin… yeah right.’ And carries on again. About NOTHING, physically sickening. Some guy tries to pick me up… good looking… with dead eyes… I leave early. So yeah, I am on here again huh…
Where do I store bad experiences… I remember them, both factual and all the emotions that went with them… but it is just that – a memory. I don’t feel connected to them emotionally anymore. I don’t feel disturbed or upset or that they influence me now… not very Freudian… My bad experiences don’t define me. I believe I have always let go off any bad stuff fast enough, just moved on and never dwelled on them. I also know that relationships with people are the ones which have had the greatest effect on my inner world, and not necessarily romantic ones. When I think about the bad (which doesn’t happen that often) I never RELIVE this emotionally. Facts. Happened. Past.
How do I define my sexuality… Hmmmm… I feel there are two aspects for me there… one is purely physical, and I am very sexual in that way. Have always been since I was a child. My imagination is such that I don’t need a physical stimulation at times to be highly aroused. But the second aspect – it is NEVER about physical. It is about the connection. It is about the person , and making love to their… soul I guess. It is very personal and very intense. That is why I found my experience with No.2 so empty and off-putting. And that is why I chose years of celibacy… indulging in primitive animal acts drains me. I have never had this kind of bond with a man where the physical is a bridge to the sacred. Never.
How do I rationalize what I want in a man… I am not sure that ‘rationalize’ even comes into play. I want the connection… that special something which has nothing to do with any material or physical aspects… when you look into the person’s eyes and see THE WORLD in all its entirety reflected back at you… it is hard to put into words. I want a journey, with no rules and regulations, when the collision of the two worlds will result in a bond, the merging of two into one… To me it doesn’t mean the two dissolve their personalities – that will always remain. But they will join their souls, this is different. It’s not what I want IN a man, it is what I want WITH the man. Not too much to ask, huh…
Gatubela, I am someone in limbo. I never really belonged out there, and even here I kind of don’t belong either. But maybe it is about belonging to something greater than human bonds, something that I am searching for and have not found yet.
Thank you
Hi Ines,
” I believe I have always let go off any bad stuff fast enough, just moved on and never dwelled on them.”
You never obtained any learning or truth from your bad stuff? You don´t dwell on it, don´t gain greater meaning from it…
This means that you are a very “superficial” person in essence Ines.
I want a journey, with no rules and regulations, when the collision of the two worlds will result in a bond, the merging of two into one… To me it doesn’t mean the two dissolve their personalities – that will always remain.
No you don´t…you are unable to love…you will never face any truthes about yourself, which are found in your darkness…which harnesses your soul energy.
Merging the two of “what” into one? If your personalities remain, that is.
But maybe it is about belonging to something greater than human bonds, something that I am searching for and have not found yet.
Again…impossible. You don´t truly know how it is to belong to yourself…so anything greater will not be forthcoming.
Those are the harsh facts Ines. I guess the “bad” in you is not worth loving…and your soul is not a reality for you either.
“You never obtained any learning or truth from your bad stuff? You don´t dwell on it, don´t gain greater meaning from it…
This means that you are a very “superficial” person in essence Ines”
What makes you say that? With such certainty? If you look at my list of crap that had happened in my life – most of it was brought on by someone. Yes, I know it takes two to tango, Gatubela. Yes, maybe I wasn’t too smart and very naive in many ways,and trusting that people will make the right choices… such as my ex’s drinking, and trying to get him out of it for years… so that those situations that could have been prevented – were not. But in my adult life, after those things took place – I had always changed. Some of it was painful, but I didn’t analyse it, it just happened. For the better. And I will keep on evolving, soulless or not. But I will NOT dwell on what once was. Ever. Or else it will be a perpetual cycle of guilt and flagellation, is that what your advice is? I have felt insecure in myself for a long time, and now I am NOT. And no one can take this away from me now. I am NOT going back there. I feel stronger than ever now.
“I guess the “bad” in you is not worth loving…and your soul is not a reality for you either.”
“you will never face any truthes about yourself, which are found in your darkness”
I don’t have a close personal relationship with the “bad” in me… whatever shape or form it takes…. The only thing I can do is to watch how my conduct effects others… My problem has always been my undoing of self rather than undoing of others… if that’s the evil then I am dealing with it… by having faith in myself… by trying to trust my intuition… by not creating imaginary fantasies and illusions and then acting them out… by accepting my imperfections so that they do not destroy the essence of who I am. Discerning is not something I am good at – learning. And the soul question… well I have been told plenty of times on here that I am soulless, huh…
I am not made of the same stuff as you. You will never understand this, Gatubela. Thank you for your comments, I’ll have to take my own path.
My Regards
Hi Ines,
Are ya fish dreamin´ “mars in pisces throwin´” those collective energies at all of us….yet again?
Mirroring “what ever” again…and you have no idea what you “do not see”?
Who was it this time? Just tell us who your source is!!! (the person you got yer “what to post in response to her” mirror info. Who ever it was…they suck!!! You may need to “rehire” because it seems that their qualifications are a bit lacking. They only give you intel on ego bla bla bla and not anything about “soul”.
Hmmmm….truth comes at a higher price…so maybe it is you that is being the real scrooge here.
“Watching your conduct on others….”
Oh…don´t bother fooling me! That´s a big bunch of hooha…Most people won´t even tell you their truth…and you are unable to perceive it.
I wonder how many eagle eyes are watching your ” lack” of something in your conduct?
Nope…I did not say you are souless…you just don´t know your soul.
Take a different path…of course that is your freewill. But don´t try to put the fish dust all over me.
Hi Ines,
“I don’t have a close personal relationship with the “bad” in me… whatever shape or form it takes…”
Most of us are not even aware of the “bad” in us. We are expected to not show it at all. And this is the big lie that society lays on us.
What a coincidence that soul energy must be cleared by facing the “bad” and then society telling us what BAD is!!! It seems like a cruel joke…
And then we fall. As soon as you say “bad” then you search for “good”. Then comes the programming…for the “bad” things, we feel pain. For the “good” things, we feel compensated.
But we have not realized that we sold ourselves out….by preferring dualism and closed the doors to “truth” and our very own soul.
Sorry about the harshness of my previous comment…and I don´t mean to make this into a conflict with you. I just intensely dislike how you shape shift to anything you feel like.
Just understand that watching the effect of your conduct on others and using that as an indicator of “something”…is actually listening and bootlicking their lies too.
I understand that we are not made of the same stuff…
Hahaha… that mutant behavioral woman is a female Scorpio! A perfect role for such a creature.
The woman. Yes. Not a bunny.
“I just intensely dislike how you shape shift to anything you feel like.”
This is exactly what I meant when I said we are made of different stuff. Yes, I am mutable and fluid. One of my Scorpio friends said to me ‘You are a mystery to me, I cannot figure you out’… Good. No one will ever get to the core, although some will claim they do. So what ? Providing I can get to my core… Why should it matter to others?
…The conformed mind and heart believes whole-heatedly what is fed to them on a literal level. Most people are too afraid to question their pain and dysfunction in their respective relating experiences. They just accept and survive….
I left my family at the age of 19 after college. It was my escape from the dysfunction and also to search for a job to provide for family. I’ve spent several years alone, hiding questioning myself what is wrong with me. I do not know why am very sensitive. I can feel other people feelings, intentions… sometimes I become one of them. So I was protective and defensive about the people I let inside. My break up with my ex made me feel so insecure and even questioned myself if am really capable of loving a man. I was sad, angry and I do not know how to heal myself. But I also have this longing for something beyond… it is my continues question and seeking since child… but I do not know what that is…
Then Mr Scorpio happens… He took me into a journey, definitely not a typical romantic relationship.
Though I was warned in this forum to not mess with the eagle when he’s hungry lol! my inner guidance was like a volcano pushing me to face him like you gotta do it! It’s now or never!! I decided to not run away emotionally from what is happening within me although his words are very hurtful. Sun/Moon in Scorpio, Sag rising. Sag honesty then you add a double whammy of scorpionic honesty then that is a lot of ouchie!!! Instead of annihilating back I flowed with the energy. I feel closer to him when he was rocking the boat. I wanted to understand him more why he decided to destroy; from love to nothing and to empathize to whatever that is bothering him.
It went into a point of reopening wounds from the past and experience the suffering we want to avoid. The reflecting mirrors I’ve mentioned in comment 1103 were so confusing; He mirrored back the fears I haven’t faced. I was in deep pain thinking that he doesn’t want to be with me. I accepted the truth like stabbing my own heart. For some reason it forces me to venture deeper into the basement of my own soul and confront the shadows lurking there. It was not just about the relationship anymore. It took me back to my childhood traumatic experiences, the physical abuse I experienced from the people I cared about (my parents), my failed past relationship, my fear of loss. At the same time he was shocked to see his own mirror, how he passionately, patiently and obsessively followed his first love (ex gf) and so he remembered his experience of abandonment and rejection. He was also battling his sexual tensions over me. I was confused and I didn’t know what to do in order to break free from the mirrors.
We do not know what to do when do not place the people in our hearts…we fall out of love..
So I used my willpower to take myself out of the pain and him back in my heart. Yes, I want to be with him, I want his love, I want his friendship, I want ALL. Those are all my honest and raw feelings. But exhale… I have to fall out of my attachment to him and fall in love with myself. Loving someone is not only about holding on but also letting go unconditionally. I learned from this relationship that to love a man is to complete yourself in order to complete him without attachments to his gifts and even without him in your life.
I understood his pain, his madness if he is in love the moment I separate from his mirror. I want to give back to the changes and transformation he brought into my life. So I decided to share the story of my life not to compete who conquered his/her fears best but to share. That I’ve been through hell .… that I can understand and accept him for who he is. Now we can heal and begin to love again and the love should start within through self-love.
….Death of her old-self was “the Freedom” she had been yearning for….
Facing our own fears and darkness is a like decent to the inferno. It is indeed a psychological death. It gives incredible pain, sadness but even pain can flow through surrender. When we fully embrace rather than battle the nothingness we feel inside…. the soul emerges and experiences spiritual rebirth…
When I woke up the next day, I feel like a new person. For the first time in my life I feel like am not alone anymore. That there is an eternal life beyond, I call it GOD, not only beyond but a being I feel deep within.
Gosh Lovemari, your spirit is evident, your heart brave and questioning, your mind feels way beyond the petty separatists limitations of fearing “destruction” in relating… of which you don’t want or need to show the nearest audience a false ideology of ego “perfection”… for you simply understand in soul those separate entities do not shape your ego, nor happiness… according to the energy of others. You understand negative “insecurity” is as part of your human essence as giving birth. Natural you are. Naturally you are loved. hahaha, I Love it.
You’re a wise, strong, ethical and integral woman for those who can appreciate it… I really admire your inner-growth, this world needs more souls like you, as what you demonstrate among people through WHO YOU ARE, not by looking for cheap applause and fake acknowledgement, or hypocritical rule-changing acceptance. Your RICHLY GENUINE heart, settled among real relating with others people on this forum is admired from here. You’re a crusader and a champion of something much greater within you, over how great you “think” you are among insecure, indifferent energy.
My energy happily surrenders to your beauty, to your femininity and depth of human understanding expressed here:
“..I want to give back to the changes and transformation he brought into my life. So I decided to share the story of my life not to compete who conquered his/her fears best but to share. That I’ve been through hell .… that I can understand and accept him for who he is..”
You’ve become closer to the Source, within you. You’ve discerned the man and what it begins to all mean in your individualized and awake choice. You are finding true-life meaning, through death (change) of abusive lies, fears and superficial issues. You understand that truth is not your personal opinion. Or anyone else’s opinion. You’re flying with eagle now… you see that truth is an ancient energy of love, service and care propelled and received as one, from the intelligence of beating our hearts. The heart hears and feels what the ego expels. The ego hears and feels the infatuations of it’s own desire for false perfection. All of which…. you soulfully understand.
My Saturn is in Cancer, in the 4th House. It’s actually the most important planetary energy/symbol placed on my chart… in terms of fulfilling the boundaries, structure and lawfulness of mundane solidity-of-self and accepted mundane limitations/duty in the known world = Saturn. So Saturn in Cancer in the 4th is all about the the safety and evolution of “Home” (Cancer). From high and deep spiritual levels of understanding, our home is much more than our physical family upbringing, energies far more meaningful than our nutty family conditioning, and our home environment and what life is supposed to mean in that restricted environment. Home/family (and Mother, which symbolizes Cancer/4th) with Saturn churning from there, has revealed it’s “responsibility” (Saturn) i the “home” (Cancer/4th house). So after living 13 years in the U.S, I am flying home (Australia) in about a month to revive my evolution as man among my mum and half-siblings and other relatives. My soul is supposed to return to “my Origin” (Cancer/4th house) to fulfill spiritual love with my family members.
Saturn is the symbol of “Restriction” from a worldly, law abiding, practical, duty obligated level. There is indeed tremendous spirituality in the practical and physical world. I carried a very depleted heart for many years in that restriction, through my outer-world perceptional limitation. My ego during those self-deceitful, suppressed years controlled the feeling of my soul freedom through meaningless ego choices/realities and material desire/vice.
However… as fate has it, my feeling of those past seen restrictions in myself and humanity, now and forever more, are cherished blessings of “self-doing” in psychological, emotional purposes. (as opposed to self-undoing via blind indifference, atheism, calculation, manipulation and coercion among myself and people) I developed “the structure” (Saturn) of my REAL HOME BASE. Where is my real home base you wonder??… That home sweetheart not “just” in Australia with my family. HOME IS WHERE THE HAPPINESS AND VITALITY OF THE HEART IS, which in retrospect had been purging false material ego-attachments, greed desires, uncaring, non-serving self-interest and sensual pleasures to fulfill immediate indulgences while in dysfunctional relating with people and the illusion cultivated within me.
Love
Pluto
I have a question, what do you feel is “truthful”? is truth the cold facts? or is it something beyond the laws of physics to bypass the facts for what he/she believes is the higher good?
Does the cold facts stops you from embracing the higher good?
I did not write the above question (although it probably looks like I did, heh), but I connect with what Lovemari has written here. I feel that and am trying to overcome that.
It hasn’t stopped me, because that would imply my journey has ended. But my mind is very analytical, so I must learn to soothe it and let go of controlling (as I do once in a while). And open my heart more and see where it takes me.
Whatever answer I give you to those questions you won’t understand anyway, because I have already demonstrated at length here on the forum the will, the motivation and intent for truthful energy exchanged between us, the intent be it highly inspirational and caring, or be it negative, rude, brazen, ego-fulfilling, which hasn’t wanted any humane resolution, but only craves the separation of the game, the excitement “to act through our written word” (which is very normal) to play the game and to prove a meaningless point,a shallow, a hollow, an unloving point. This is in direct relation to your thinking (riddled in your question above) of people being truthful or “having integrity” through their expression in cold rational terms, regardless of what they say. Ever.
Your questions are innocent because it (you) does not feel the darkside of human deception and the undercurrent desire of human nature. You don’t feel the control energy or manipulation tactics within yourself, seen and manifested within yourself and seen and tricked from the efforts in another person. So deeper layers of energy, the unknown, beyond your logical questioning do not recognize people lying to themselves in life, in order for those people “to gain” something (motivation) besides love and loving reception/understanding. Emotions you see… the feelings we analyze daily, are not “hard categorical facts”. Once again that limited psychology of your question thinks that feelings are fact related, fact originated, fact caused and that those facts of ones opinion equals the truth amid communicative relationships. hahahaha.
Example 1: If you were to obtain an aviation pilot’s licence, then jump in the cockpit and in exhilaration fly a plane… would you THINK about how that experience feels?… or would you just instinctively FEEL how that experience feels?… Example 2: If you dived naked into icey cold water, would you simply THINK about that extreme experience?… or would you just FEEL that shocking experience, without thinking at all?.. Example 3: If you were to scream loudly thanks to an orgasm with a man, would you THINK IN THAT MOMENT about your experience?… or would you simply and instinctively FEEL THAT experience happening the moment?… Get my drift? So cold rationalizing and detail mastery out in pragmatic world is great for survival and career competency and achievement… but that cold ability or reality IS USELESS in the relation of feelings in giving love genuinely and receiving potent loving energy. No matter how stormy. You still FEEL.
In order for you to know a glimmer of what I’m talking about, you would have to have felt and confronted relational pain, loss, betrayal, discomfort and self-deceit via a deeper reflection of your past and current life experiences with people. Not your educational systems memory of love.
“..or is it something beyond the laws of physics to bypass the facts for what he/she believes is the higher good?
“Beliefs alone”… don’t create “a higher good”. Look carefully at the motivations and deeds applied by Christianity, Muslim, Catholic, Hebrew, Scientology “Faiths”. They are all created and followed to the-T in those beliefs. Those crystallized ego-attached beliefs, “rationalized” by people control the minds, AND FEELINGS of human existence on a huge collective level. Those faiths WERE CREATED, in vision of and by opportunistic men way back in history. Their core message “promotes” love and faith and kindness and peaceful ideologies… yet these doctrines are in truth MEGA BUSINESSES. Big money making businesses. WHICH IS WHY, over their history… people have been robbed blind, wars have ensued, people, children have been raped, dominated and mentally/emotionally abused on many levels, and murdered. They were controlled and conned as a result of the rigidity and fixed obsessions to their respective “faith” or “belief system” in that religion. Capitalism, Atheism and Elitism are more examples of rigid mind Institutions (religions) with the same intense motivations/framework as described above. To appease and control. Those very powerful controlling belief organizations are EGOTISTICAL CREATIONS throughout this current world, and it evolved to sickening proportions from the ancient world. Those real INSTITUTIONS among us, have desirous motivations TO CONFORM, to crystallize and to exploit the emotional reality and reasoning ability in people, as they pin-point the innocent hope in human beings.
This long answer was necessary because there are layers of life going on here.
You would have to intimately know what CORRUPTED LEADERSHIP and POWER IS before you could understand the darkside of human intent, their realities which desire to conform you into a pervasive political sense, into a conformed ideological sense and/por in a strawberry’s and cream religious and socioeconomic sense. Each FOLLOWER then, within their respective belief SYSTEMS, does not have “a mind of their own”. They are conformed hearts, such as yours.
Hi Gatubela,
It’s OK, you speak as you feel. Unlike Pluto, you’ve never really ‘mirrored’ me, I appreciate that. I do mirror, it is my inner nature… I cannot change that completely. As Pluto said once ‘I conduct myself according to the energy I am presented with (in people)’. So do I. My ‘whatever’ reply was about my feeling hopeless, yes, I am giving up. I don’t get the mysticism and the symbolism of the written language here. I don’t know what the SOURCE is, and I don’t feel connected to it. What the heck is it?
Watching my conduct… that meant my sometimes explosive reactions which scare people, and I don’t want to scare anyone, I want to find solutions to whatever it is in the situation.
Some months back I went through a very hard period… shutting myself away from everything and feeling broken inside, days and weeks went by; I cried every day and told myself that everything in my life was meaningless, and so was I…. My job at the neuro at the time… most people never come to contact with this side of life… It made me question our perceptions of reality… what was the reality for those people? After your body, yes, body begins to give up on you… after you went into another car at 70mph… after your world had turned upside down, and you still have conscious awareness but without feeling yourself anymore… The hurt, the anger, the confusion… their manifestations directed at everyone… how do you deal with that? When you are not YOU anymore? All you could do is be accepting of THEIR reality and be KIND to it… I was the one called in to COMMUNICATE and make people at peace… But I couldn’t make myself at peace.
They try to give you pills hmmm… I refused point blank, as I knew I MYSELF could find my way back. And I did… not by analysing, but by feeling what it was that was making me that way. Yes, I tried to externalise everything first, but then something told me it was how I perceived things, how I perceived who I am, and my perceptions of me had to change. Something positive, again I do not analyse that, it just was. And I found the acceptance. So I don’t need to live in self inflicting pain anymore. My personal ‘evil’ has always been my lack of belief in myself. Yep, people tell you – you are great at this and that, it wasn’t enough because I didn’t see it in myself. Now I don’t need anyone’s validation of me and who I am. It is still fragile, and I could ‘oscillate’, but I have the ‘tools’ within me to deal with it. They may be different from yours but they work for me, and so be it. I heal myself in the only way I know how. It is my positive nature, and I call it ‘light’, you may call it differently.
So on here – I have given up…. I will never talk about my internal life in the way some people can. I don’t have the language for that.
I mirror people’s negative energy when there is real INTENTto pass it on to you, such as deliberate confrontation. I don’t mirror when people are genuinely angered or upset or even furious… genuinely. I am calm then and can deal with THEIR frustrations rather than mine.
Hi Ppuppy,
My energy happily surrenders to your beauty, to your femininity and depth of human understanding expressed here:“..I want to give back to the changes and transformation he brought into my life. So I decided to share the story of my life not to compete who conquered his/her fears best but to share. That I’ve been through hell .… that I can understand and accept him for who he is..”
…( teary eyed… sniffle..) Thanks Pluto Puppy… Your love, understanding and compassion are felt over here.
….You’ve become closer to the Source, within you…
That’s exactly how I feel the moment I share my life experiences to him (Mr Scorpio)… There was sense of relief… it was the freedom I’ve been longing for. I hope sharing my experiences here contributes to the humanitarian spirit of this forum. I admire the energy you are putting on here to make those scorpionic healing power accessible to humanity. You are sharing in your own eagle way :-). It did awaken that part of me as well… that the love I feel inside should not only focus towards someone special. I feel so peaceful and loved that I want to share….
I am also uplifting my relationship with my family. I journeyed back to home (Philippines) about a month ago. It’s quite different compared to my previous visits. I gained better understanding about my family issues. As for my parents, there are things that I can’t change… I can’t change them and I can’t change the past… Bad things happen, we have the right to choose but sometimes there are things that are out of our control but we can always choose how to deal with it.
I still sizzle when they throw their earthy darkness to me. I have Pluto & Saturn in Libra in 2nd house while Taurus Sun in the 8th house. All my relating has to deal with strict Saturn and meanie Scorpionic truths lol. Whenever my volcano tells me that something is not right… I detach for a while… breathed out… and then come back… and show the opposite “LOVE. It’s not easy… but I have faith…
I was happy to see how my little bro has grown (13)… full of dreams and fire. (Aries/Leo) lol! He is my little cheeky cub ☺. I had a heart to heart talk with my younger sister after a long time. She is my little warrior (Cappy/Scorp). She had cushioned herself many times to somehow protect me during those violent times. I’ve realized that I can actually give more… more than just the financial support I’ve been providing them. You know…just being there… present… a space to show that she is not alone. My Neptune in Sag in the 4th house draws inspiration from my siblings. They are my source of inspiration and dearest motivation to fulfill my dreams.
I’ve notice that my sister is more expressive and trusting now… I know it takes some time… definitely not an over night thing… it’s a process… but I feel happier, I feel love… I feel home.. ☺
..You understand that truth is not your personal opinion. Or anyone else’s opinion. You’re flying with eagle now… you see that truth is an ancient energy of love, service and care propelled and received as one, from the intelligence of beating our hearts. The heart hears and feels what the ego expels. The ego hears and feels the infatuations of it’s own desire for false perfection…
I couldn’t agree more… Truth is beyond words….Truth won’t have a language… the heart sees and feels what is real…
…..I carried a very depleted heart for many years in that restriction, through my outer-world perceptional limitation. My ego during those self-deceitful, suppressed years controlled the feeling of my soul freedom through meaningless ego choices/realities and material desire/vice. However… as fate has it, my feeling of those past seen restrictions in myself and humanity,……..
Our own darkness can actually transform us. As we confront our own darkness the energy releases and somehow fix any twisted emotions or habits.
There is just one thing I worry about… gosh!! Am starting to hate shopping!!! Lol! I used to have this fascination about shoes… and you know what does shoes mean in Taurean world! lol! Well it does make me happy… but it is superficial! I still do shop but rather practical ☺ and I still eat no matter what…. sorry…I am a bull… ☺
…. now and forever more, are cherished blessings of “self-doing” in psychological, emotional purposes. (as opposed to self-undoing via blind indifference, atheism, calculation, manipulation and coercion among myself and people)…….
There were times when I questioned myself WHY. Why do I still get nightmares about the violent times when I thought I have forgiven my parents. Why am I afraid to trust and to love again when I thought I have forgiven my ex bf for his betrayal. I’ve realized that my forgiveness are empty… because am not truly healed from the past and that I have forgiven myself yet.
I find it funny when some people say… Oh my painful life experiences made me wiser, stronger but their self-undoing shows that they are reliving the past. The experiences make you sadder… miserable. It is the willpower to phoenixed out that part of like makes the person stronger and wiser.
You’ve explained Saturn in Cancer in the 4th perfectly. I hope you have a great time on your trip to Australia!! I love traveling too (Jupiter in Sag :-)). Ausie is definitely on my travel bucket list ☺ 13 years wow! I’ve been away for close to 9 years but I do visit them at least once or twice a year. I hope you have beautiful time with your family.
Regards,
Lovemari
I’ve realized that my forgiveness is empty… because am not fully healed from the past and that I have NOT forgiven myself yet.
typo….
Do you know, Pluto, I have been reading the ‘history’ of us on here, and I must say… hmmmm… I am one ‘reacting’ personality. Not that you didn’t at times, but… My own interpretation of what was not there, but what I saw as being there… Especially considering that it was an everyday full on conversation. I should have walked away for a few days and then take another look with ‘fresh eyes’. My 100mph…
You really are crazy… There was a lot of love there, why the heck did I not feel it?
I am sorry, darling. Really. Just don’t call me ‘pea brain’ and ‘ego egg’. Please.
Everything will be OK
Hi Ines Sister, Am glad that you’re still here….
Hmmm.., you know what… Poseidon and Hades can actually work together.
Poseidon guides you upward while Hades guides you downward to deal with the shadows without which Poseidon will be lacking in power.
See… we are blessed with all the tools, energies within us but it is how we use it. You can’t just simply say ahh I’m a water I can mirror you lol! You may want to evaluate that again… it could be that it is your own reaction “personality” to your own mirror??
…Just don’t call me ‘pea brain’ and ‘ego egg’. Please…
Cute 🙂 Eagles will always be eagles. You have to understand where those love stings landed within yourself. Healing Scorpio sting the part of you that needs it’s own death. These are the questions I would be asking myself.
1. Why does he call me “pea brain” when am very smart! I have read all types of books and I am very much experienced. I can even summarize the entire forum in one single comment.
2. Why does he call me “ego egg” ? Do I look like a balloon full of gas that when somebody lit a match I explode and get all over the place?
Reminds me of Mr Scorpio. He was like OK!! Ask away but don’t blame me. I will only give brutal honest answer! Well… it was so nice of him to warn me before the first sting lol! He literally told me “You are not qualified!!” (Gosh! What position am I applying for? Last time I check you’ve been chasing me, flying here and there to get my attention??) See… it was my ego that he wants to dissolve I was so full of myself. The eagle got drained and told me enough is enough I am not going to make you happy anymore… (prepare for your death). I felt that it hurts him too to do that… so I decided to work on myself… I have my own cave to do my soul work . This forum is also part of that cave. Now I couldn’t be more grateful for those love stings…. 🙂
Okkkkk…. You have your own path… 🙂
But for me truth is infinite…. You cannot approach it by any path… I follow my own heart…
We love you here…
Hugs,
Love
Mari
“Poseidon guides you upward while Hades guides you downward to deal with the shadows without which Poseidon will be lacking in power.”
Yes, this is what happened for me in real life for which I am grateful.
And now here… And I am crying, but not because of that… Last night when I read through all the comments, something suddenly SHIFTED within me. Qualitatively. I cannot even explain it, oh I am so bad with trying to put feelings into words… It was not in my head as previously. It was in my heart, and then realisation came, and then the pain came, and I keep crying… The love from those comments, and I hurt someone I love, through ignorance and lack of perception … it is bloody miserable. The pain of hurting someone you love is greater than the pain of being hurt. It doesn’t matter whether he felt it or not. What matters is that I, ME, have DONE it.
Why was I digging for his weaknesses? To offset them against my own? To prove exactly what? To not feel intimidated? To prove he is not worthy of my love? To put up a barrier? Nothing. One big nothing. I was given a mirror to look at myself… neat…
And another thing… He is right here now. In his TRUE form… see it transcends the boundaries…
I just want to crawl into bed, hide under the blanket, and feel through what I am feeling… it is too strong… I am not feeling guilty. I am feeling devastated, and EVERYTHING is personal…
I would like to quote one of Pluto Puppy’s heart touching comment;
….So slowed down, quieted the mind, settled the heart, and just noticed myself breathing. I noticed my ego as a separate entity away from powerful spiritual energy flowing through me and around me…..
Feel your soul Ines….. hugs….
I was given light and I ostentatiously met it with darkness… again and again and again… What have I done… who am I? I’ve abused the love, not only coming from him, but diminished my own love to the ground floor level… And it hurts so much to feel the potential damage of this abuse, and what it could have been… if it wasn’t for the strength of the man in question… Taken out into the real world… is that what we do to one another on a daily basis? Because we expect negativity coming our way, based on crappy life experiences and armed with preconceived notions of what relating is about – football out anything with inherent hostility, without feeling its real energy… even when the intent was loving and caring…
What is the online equivalent of looking someone in the eye… I have to face you…. I haven’t loved you before in the way you wanted. I wasn’t able, I was oblivious to the essence of who you are.. I loved the personality, this superficial humdrum of surface presentation… not the man behind it… What I feel now is slowly churning inside of me and it feels so much bigger than me, enormous. I have not felt like this before, and I do want to run except now it is conscious… I don’t even know if I can sustain it… everything has just turned upside down. What have you done…
The “darkness” channel it as high as you could go… (the Poseidon energy)…. choose love and choose to what you feel is pure and soulful. We can remain soulful even when fighting.
Detach…. Don’t listen to anyone… don’t listen to yourself… listen to the wind…. Listen to the present moment… surrender to it…. surrender to what is…..
If you feel so much pain… embrace it…. keep writing…..
I’m feeling you…
Hugs and lots of love,
Mari
Humanity. Being Human are not just words.
yeah…. trust the voice within……
Feelings do not lie… and I mixed those with thoughts and turned them into emotions and oh how those emotions deceive and have been deceiving me… Manifestations of how I THINK I feel, not how I FEEL… Feeding me the untruths and feeding my ego when I thought I don’t have one… what a blatant self deceit…
I cannot talk to the man… He caught me when I was falling, never walked away… and through all the fights and bickering I kept asking myself WHY… so I must have known the answer deep inside. The humility and patience and love… this is killing me… because I couldn’t match them, and I know I have all that within me, why couldn’t I? I don’t feel guilty or ashamed… I forgive myself for being human, and I know he doesn’t need my apologies. What I feel now is pure and both bitter ans sweet… something I could die for. To me everything on here is REAL now, more real than in the real world… one month exactly after I posted my first comment. I still cry… this is a public space and Jesus I am shedding my skin right in front of everyone. THIS kind of love… for one human being and becoming universal? And will it? I cannot love in public… I cannot do that…
The song… the lyrics… thank you. My trust is absolute now.
And Mari… thank you too.
Hi Ines,
Thank you is not necessary. Hugs!
You have to thank you and love you…. you did it girl!!!
Now trust that voice within in that way you won’t feel alone… no more crying….
Love and trust yourself…. slowly you will see the path that is unique and special to you…. and will lead you to the truth…
Love,
Mari
I know this scorpio guy….
When he was young boy, he was innocent and full of trust in the world. He looked at it with open and the most wisest eyes you have ever seen…like he knew all the answers to all of the problems that he was so capable of feeling. He actually was a cute boy…and got dirty alot too.
Strange how he feels problems, you probably are “thinking”. Right? Like who feels problems? Do you?
For him, his feelings are his 5 senses. We see problems…he feels them. We hear people…he feels them. We touch people with our hands…he feels them with his soul…and so on.
So, yeah, he watched the violence happen in front of his “feelings”…because what he felt when he saw that, was incredible pain and anguish. You probably only feel this when you watch starving people in war strucken, disease ridden countries…
Well…remember that just for a minute. That time when something “affected your emotions” when you “saw” it.
The people around him where not aware of the fact that he could feel them. What do you “think” he was feeling? Well…the answer is simple. He was feeling what they should have, but did not.
The slap would land…but he would not feel the slap, he would feel the “lie”…
The woman would flirt and he would feel her sensuality, he would feel her “insecurity”…
People are talking about their “day” and he would not feel their happiness, he would feel their fear…
The truth is…if people had felt the lie, they would not have slapped.
If the woman had felt her insecurity, she would not have flirted…
And if people felt their fear, they would not be talking about their day…
Get it?
So, strange how a feeling can be just as bad as a beating? He felt what they should have felt if they had been honest with themselves. That one thing that would have stopped it all.
Eventually his greatest strength became his weakness, as he felt their shame, separation, greed, anger…and he did not recieve love, he became it.
Because love would have changed his life in a huge way…he was just a boy.
It became so confusing, the he thought that he was actually “evil”…LoL! But it was just that his soul was able to absorb not only his pain, but the pain of others.
I will continue sharing about this great guy I know…
I know, Gatubela…. I feel his soul, beautiful and tender and whole… my love for him, in the way nothing ever felt before… unconditional…… made me feel my own soul… just the beginning of the journey…. he’s given me myself.
Hmmmm….you must be one sensitive fish!!!
Well…there are some times that you wish that time would stop…to that one moment that you lost yourself…when did that happen?
I remember one time, a girl (my best friend when I was a girl, was a scorpio) made fun of another overweight girl, who happened to be wearing a swimming suit while we were swimming.
I looked at her and I said..
.”What…you don´t see it?”
I got angry! She looked embarassed at the rest of the group. They were all having a good time laughing at the bulges!
“I mean…what is wrong with you? Don´t you see her uncomfortableness and awkwardness, because she truly does not want to be overweight? That does not let you feel compassion and understanding in your heart?”
You see, if people only felt their shadows…their sadness, their shame, their pain…this world would be a better place to live.
We would be so focussed on healing ourselves, instead of lying.
All this is deeply troubling. Chop chop, the pool has been reduced to near NOTHING… one big NEVER when it comes to romantic relationships. If I was thought of as ‘too complex’ and ‘too intense’ before, what is THIS going to do? I am yet to find a man who will fully engage me on all levels, that never happened before, I always felt the ‘lack’ of something… and now… even worse. As a Pisces I am attracted to quietly confident men who have that dominant streak he-he… that’s my nature and I learn through my relationships… and I can’t stand big brush personalities, because if one digs deeper – there is nothing there but fluff… Ah most I’ve known are wimps anyway… NOTHING of any substance if I attempted to look within. So they run away in bewilderment… In the ‘normal’ world what I usually hear is expressed to me as ‘You think too much’… ‘Feel’ would be another level, but that doesn’t even enter their equation… lovely… I should be happy with my voice within… the truth is people don’t just need love and unity with the divine, they need that love and unity with a mortal like themselves… loving yourself and being at peace with who you are and feeling connection to the Source is enough… nah, it is never enough. Or else we would all stay on our own… why search for someone then? I have procreated, my ‘animal’ mission as part of the species has been accomplished, so why not stop? Still searching…. or was… Well, this is the question then – WHY do we want to love another and be loved? Take away need for security, survival, procreation, egotistic desires to parade yourself and your latest ‘catch’ before the rivals…. strip all those away…. WHY?
The night before something or someone was with me… peaceful and protective… today I feel alone… not lonely… just alone.
The Source is… within me… I wasn’t with something or someone, I was with ME…. literal notions fall away… I am (potentially) divine…
Hi Ines,
Why love?
Well, other than the fact that you mention that you are more interested in loving a guy, other than yourself…you are missing a whole bunch of your own “goodies” Ines, which I am sure are unique and beautiful. So, don´t love a guy until you discover that in yourself.
I feel that we are blessed with a special and unique expression of energy Ines. I am a bit more warrior, but I feel that not every woman is. We all have our own inner beauty. Why don´t you take the time to find yours out? Maybe you are someone more in tune to earth energies…or water and ocean creatures…what do your dreams tell you? What do you dream of the most?
Yes, the answer to your question….
Because there is no state of being more powerful, and I mean in all aspects…than feeling love inside yourself, feeling loved, and giving love.
It makes you see that anything is possible, that our pains are illlusion, that they have been empowered in society instead of love…and that what you have been living all of your life, was just a bloody sad imitation of it.
Love sees through everything…all the things that we feel are bad and shameful about ourselves…if touched with true love (soulful and non-judgemental), VANISH instantaneously, through understanding and compassion.
We live in a cold and souless society Ines…it assures that we will feel bad…choose dualism…empower the negative collective energies, and not have access to more powerful energies. Any scorpio will tell you that there are more powerful energies out there…none of them feel that society is ….ALL there IS.
Keeping us in ignorance, assures our slavery and turns us into beings who do not create…and have access to creative energy.
Once you have access the source…the mysteries of the universe are forth coming, because they are already inside us….the laws are in our souls…we are naturals at it.
But not if our “nature” is taken away from us.
Oh Gatubela, you couldn’t be more right…. that’s the thing… I HAVE dicovered now love bigger than anything that I have known before, and hey it took me into myself… I feel it and I AM it, my own source of happiness and compassion and understanding… my non-judgemental nature is my birth right… helps there…
So you believe then that we are pre-ordaned with craving for love from birth, but the true meanining of it vanishes as we enter the world in all consciousnessness and we replace what it should be – for what it is not…
I oscillate… as in… it is not there 24/7, I have to make a conscious effort to bring myself back to ME, it is hard, and only has been a few days since I FELT truly… In all honesty I have been confusing my feelings with my emotions for most of my life it seems… I am impatient, I want everything NOW:) I learn by consolidation when everything SUDDENLY happens, the light bulb moment, the eurika… always have… my fights on here are a prime example, that’s why I wasn’t giving up, although was close a few times.
Dreams… grey eyes with yellow tint which change colour with light… hazel, sometimes bluish or greenish…. My dreams are extremely vivid, in full technicolour LOL… If I told you…. not for a public place, some of them… They have a mystical side and always angst there, occasionally I wake up sobbing, with full tears running.. hmmmm… what does it tell about me… Premonitions… when things I dreamed about happened a few months down the line… scary and I guess I suppress this side of me… while being aware of it… can really throw you off kilter…
Why do you think dreams are important? I understand that this is a no constraint territory, with feelings fully realised, but how would that relate to your real being? Have you ever had a dream in which you could fly?
I am a feminine…. warrier. I cannot separate these two… I have to learn to choose my battles wisely.
Hi Ines,
Any common theme in your dreams? You have not shown to be much of a warrior…I am saying that because perhaps you don´t show certain things.
No problem…perhaps you need to heal first.
What if you are a lover and not a fighter? What if you are a protector of your child? What if you are a visionary? Or a healer?
Maybe you are a psychic in tune with the elements…
Why limit yourself?
You have to learn to feel your energies Ines…So just keep on trying to get to YOU…and feel that it won´t be anything society has a job opening for…
Society has no room for people who truly love and manifest their gifts.
LoL…
“So you believe then that we are pre-ordaned with craving for love from birth, but the true meanining of it vanishes as we enter the world in all consciousnessness and we replace what it should be – for what it is not…”
I can only state my experiences….they are not beliefs Ines, they are my personal struggles. My own “Eurekas!!!”
Perhaps yours are different. But yes, my eurekas (¡!) have been more as you say.
And I have seen it with the mutable nature of children. Their childhood experiences…(feeling loved and accepted or being abused) MAKE a difference.
So, how we open their minds, to what we open them to, and at what age we do it, will literally change their destiny.
“Society has no room for people who truly love and manifest their gifts.”
Where does it place those people then? What about survival… I am really crap at finding my place within society… you have no idea…
Gatubela, please tell me why you think you are a warrier? When you place ‘warrier’ against ‘lover’ in your previous comment… in that way I feel certainly more of a lover… So why are you a warrier?
Hmmmm….Just a though here…
You can´t love with out first understanding what life is…
so you are a love warrier… keeping it in your heart… regardless of what life throws at you…
I understand.
I know what life is… you think I don’t notice and don’t feel and don’t struggle… taking into account my acute sensitivities? I do. But they have always confused me… what was real and what was not…. Am I feeling something that is not there? Or is it there? So I just shut it out. And the material plane has never been enough for me… I didn’t know what true love is and its place in life… something I can give my life for. We all differ in the way we come across it, but the end result is the same, isn’t it…
Gatubela, I truly appreciate you being here…
Well that song is actually where I started…many years ago, when I was 22.
I did not use my energies to get guys or be more attractive to them… So I am not the most knowledgeable when it comes to these kinds of stuff.
But I used my energies to know myself, to learn about myself and to learn how to concentrate.
I understand pisces energy..even more than you know (¡!!!) .and your acute sensitivities, so you just have not felt the part of you that is divine…and actually LISTENED to it. Bad fishy!!!
Meaning, your mind listening to your soul. You begin to feel what it means to feel balance. Work on that…day in, day out…Learn to listen to yourself…learn to feel how divine true learning is.
And don´t forget to stay near harsh truthes…which will make you cry.
Reality…is the source and truth of your pain.
You will find your place soon enough.
Oh…and your LIFE is at the moment, how you think…
Would you want to surrender to that? Just read your posts and ask yourself that question…
If you feel that you would…that means you trust your most precious part of yourself (soul) to it…
If you don´t, then you have to work on changing how you think…
What kind of mentality should have a soul in its hands…?
Anyways…the reason that i am feeling that you are a not a warrior, is because your experiences have not motivated you to understand life and death. Your anger is defending your ego, and not exactly channelled towards any thing greater than…”illusion”….
Usually men understand this – although not all of them! LoL!
Scorpionic men usually understand what it means to fight for something, and use life or death energies in their battles. There is nothing more beautiful to see, than scorpio in “action”….
Women don´t usually understand this at all and get all nervous
Gatubela, I am not an angry person at all, and if you knew me in real life you would have seen it… as for Scorpio men… those that I knew I was NEVER nervous around, I really don’t understand why people say this about Scorpio men…
I live in a place full of people who not only lack soul, but lack brains as well… have just had a conversation with one who was fed up and intimidating, although this doesn’t work with me.. I am not easily intimidated in real life… since the last four years or so… and I had to be calm and stop him from talking bull and ask him why he is ALWAYS fed up. He had no answer…
And I still feel calm… but really, if shit is ALWAYS on your doorstep… as in my case… life is no fun.
and so how do I find compassion within myself for someone who is emotionally and mentally ‘crippled’ and how do I find compassion for all of those people around me… when all they see is their immediate NEED, and who would pick up a fight, physical, verbal… at the drop of a hat. And I cannot walk away from this, it is always ‘in your face’… It is simple here, the level of ‘simplicity’ below ground. Walking dead.
Hi Ines…
As I said…I have not seen warrior energies with you…you can´t maintain your state of mind.
At least not here. How you are in real life, is something that I can´t really give an opinion on.
Meaning you have no control over your INTENTIONS. You are reactionary…therefore, you are not the master of them.
Ego does not know that intentions are everything…soulful intentions are the pathway to deeper truthes and meaning in LIFE. Soulful people actually surrender to their soulful intentions.
If you see LIFE as shit always being at your doorstep, then you need to change the way you think.
You are a mutable fish…you already know that there are multiple ways (infinite) to look at something.
“you already know that there are multiple ways (infinite) to look at something.”
My personal feeling:
Everything is relative. Anything can be questioned. Nothing will be unveiled. Because everything is relative.
But love is absolute.
I won’t be posting for a while…
Alright…ok let´s look at those “nothing is” energies…
You are so wrong…what IS not relative here, is your expression of yourself…
You need only to look around you to see “YOU”…as manifested in your reality, by the fruits of your actions. So you are a tough cookie on the inside…But that does not fool scorpio. When life get´s tough and is at your doorstep, what do you do?
Sink into relativity and the fact that nothing is? Oh…you decided to fight back using those mists again. Ummm…something that IS, would be your unhappiness…
And the fact that you are searching for love…and the fact that essentially, your fish mists knows that you feel kind of angry and lonely. Not so relative.
Why don´t you plug into you pluto in neptune dreams and start seeing the mazes of your subconsciousness, as seen from PLUTONIC life or death energies?
Remember, if your intentions have not been pure…pluto will mirror it back to you, by keeping you in the dark.
Purifying your intentions, is the path to unconditional love. And it is a plutonic path to freedom from the darkness and pain.
“your fish mists knows that you feel kind of angry and lonely. ”
Not at the moment but we oscillate you know that… I am trying to feel through what is a completely unknown territory to me… yesterday has been VERY tough because I had to offset myself against some nasty stuff and nasty people…
Give me a break, Gatubela… and I don’t want to talk about this in public any more, not now, as I need to walk away and do things on my own. Or else THIS, this forum, will turn into a form of a crutch, and this is NOT what it is all about.
Love
“When life get´s tough and is at your doorstep, what do you do?”
One of those men saw me in the street today and came up and said he was sorry… I didn’t need it from him, but I just said ‘Ask yourself why you are always angry’. He said ‘I don’t really know’. There.
Gatubela, talk to me in private if you can:)
What are you talking about …”Give me a break…”
We had a conversation and I was honest.
The idea is to raise the oscillation from earthy ego perceptions to divine ones as perceived by you.
Your piscean energies can find them. And don´t focus on the light that you see here, without understanding the most purest form of light that can exist, again, as perceived by you. There is more light out there, than just…the good in people.
Yes…what love is not…is not what this forum is turning into. Your “crutching” abilities and choices, have always been on you and you alone We said we cared….
But yes, love is something that we find on our own…through trusting ourselves first.
My email is meowgatubela@yahoo.cl
Don´t laugh at the meow! LoL!
Dear EAGLE
I HAVE to say this… I was in town today…I looked into people’s faces… serious, bothered, happy, angry, indifferent, smiley… all kinds of expressions. But what I felt from them was… LIGHT. Yes, in the way you feel their anxieties and misery and fear… I have always picked up on people’s negative emotions, but not on their positive energies. Today I was feeling the GOOD. I saw their hopes, and their dreams, and their LOVE buried oh so deep below the layers of their immediate concerns… It must have shown because people looked me in the face and seemed instantly confused… I wasn’t. You were right, BELIEVING it’s there is different to FEELING it’s there… This is MY energy given to me from birth, and nobody ever taught me about it, but you. Through fear and pain and massive upheaval and anger and crying… everything on here was and is real. I will go on.
THANK YOU. Thank you for the love you have given me.
Love
Ness
Yeah…he really is an adorable eagle…
I am glad that you are seeing it now Ines…and why truth does not always give you what you want..but what you need. And why I stand by his very unique and beautiful way of expressing it.
Hugs…for you and of course, hugs for P.Puppy.
“Why don´t you plug into you pluto in neptune dreams and start seeing the mazes of your subconsciousness, as seen from PLUTONIC life or death energies?”
Sorry about this…I meant to say:
Why don´t you plug into your pluto in neptune dreams…
They are telling you something else, I am sure…
Before getting into those “nothing is.. and that is everything…” energies, you must first understand balance within yourself!
You do not find the source in less than 2 weeks. Although if you are one of the gifted, please ignore my last sentence.
You still are not understanding HOW you THINK. And as soon as you are doing that, you have channelled something from the relative nothing.
And…it means that you are FLOWING by reacting to your perception of other people´s (unsoulful) manifestation of their blindness, by sacrificing your own ego (rational). You become what they need to hear. But not what they really need.
You become the walking dead, because you gave your LIFE (mentality) to them. And you promote and defend their “death” by becoming one with it.
I know this piscean action. Which is why I feel that pisceans have to find life (masculine energies) in the the DIVINE, and surrender to that FIRST.
If you can´t get a life (masculine energy) on this earth, then get a life in the divine…
You either tune into it…or read up on it…and I feel that a good example to get you feeling on the right road is “Sermon on the Mount”…
Or in post 582, here is another “ray of light”…that can be explored.
The idea is that you find what is comfortable for you….things will resonate with you and you will feel it.
It is not all applicable…and sometimes it may seem incomplete and not relevant to OUR REALITY.
So, while examining your current reality, ask yourself if you really LIKE IT.
As we have said, LOVE is not really for our society. We begin to form snide remarks, or laugh or think it is dumb, almost before it can get a chance to bloom.
Funny how we nip it in the bud with what LOVE ain´t, huh?
Sometimes, all we have to do, to get our answers of what love is not, is just look out the window!!!
This inner state of staying IN LOVE does not come naturally because we, for most part of our lives, have not had the experience of it. It is all too easy to lapse back to the old habits of mundane existence. ‘Love warrior’ means just that – pulling yourself back into that state every time you feel it is slipping away. Being mindful every waking moment of that path, making a conscious effort to FEEL and balance your energy. I find that our interactions with people especially can disrupt that flow… hence… ‘fight’ for it, every day.
So the love warrior will only choose to fight for what he/she knows is the complete and honest TRUTH. The Sparta clip… I so get it now…
Hi Ines,
A warrior must learn to cultivate enlightenment, which is intangible…otherwise, it is a lot of “mars” and no direction.
Something happens to you when you are not scared to die Ines. Our “life” can be symbolized by “ego” and rationally defined as “how we think”.
But of course, due to its complete instability, there is nothing truly rational about it.
So, if you are going to loose your “life” (ego), it should not be for anything less than truth and love.
But hey…try telling that to the billions out there.
A lot of ‘mars’ and no direction… hahaha.. reminds me of someone… let’s see who… oh wait… ME:)
I am BEGINNING to not be scared of death… enlightenment is what makes it possible, you feel a bigger force out there…. which is also part of each one of us… so why fear…
I have known my Scorp guy since we were teenagers (we used to see each other back in the day) although we fell out of touch as I moved out of the area. I am now 27 & have moved back to my mums after my relationship of 6 years to an Aries ended (he was far too laid back for my liking). So I randomly bump into my Scorp, he takes my number & wants to pursue me (I’m having none of it at this point) Anyway a week later he goes on holiday & calls me (instead of going out, having fun with his pals) having a deep conversation about ‘the future’ & how he isn’t a player anymore & wants to settle down even asking me how many kids I want, names, sexes. A week later I go & meet him, I felt like a teenager again! Straight away he hugs me & keeps hold of me for the WHOLE time I’m with him. He was just staring lovingly into my eyes, telling me how beautiful I am & he could see himself marrying me (I was chuffed at this obviously cause I am so into him) even going into detail where we would live after marriage. Anyway this was back in October, since then he has been hot & cold with me, stirring up emotions that I have never experienced in my whole life. I thought I was ‘in love’ with my Ex (the Aries) but now I am questioning if I’ve been in love atal until now? (Yes I’m head over heels in love with my Scorp). He doesn’t really talk of the future anymore & said he doesn’t have time for a gf as he is so busy with his music & business & it wouldn’t be fair on me but I know he cares deeply for me.
We ‘made love’ for the FIRST time ever last week and it was mind blowing, even thinking about it makes me weak at the knees. Here’s me thinking my Scorp will be hooked now as we have done the deed but if anything he has remained the same. He has tested me throughout & only after studying Scorps I realised that I have done so many things for him to be cold with me & unknowingly to me stirred up the famous Scorp jealousy, but luckily nothing for him to hate me. I speak to him everyday via bb only about random things. He knows I love him very much but doesn’t speak (write) of his feelings anymore or even respond to mine, instead he’ll causally discuss another topic as if he has missed what I wrote-lol. I think at the times I stirred up his jealousy he took giant steps back so now I have to earn his trust again. I am crazy about him and I KNOW this is the man for me so am willing to wait when he’s ready.
Yesterday he bb’s me randomly telling me how some girl at work fancies him & he doesn’t see why cause he’s never given her that impression (?) Although I ‘should’ have felt some jealousy I was quite amused about the whole situation, but after thinking about it for the whole day it really threw me as to why he would have shared that information with me cause he reveals nothing & when I say nothing I mean it’s like getting blood out of a stone (I’ve told him this before).
Can somebody shed some light on this please, I’d absolutely love to hear from a Scorp guy to really break it down for me.
Well there is certainly a Scorpio guy to help you out here:) Just wait…
It feels that you two are genuinly interested in one another, but…
“Here’s me thinking my Scorp will be hooked now as we have done the deed but if anything he has remained the same.”
You think you can ‘hook’ a guy… by having sex with him… what exactly do you mean by that? What kind of ‘change’ would you expect from him ‘the day after’?
Thanks for your response but WOW a bit harsh (?) I’m not saying that I want him to commit to me overnight, I just meant cause we already have strong feelings for each other he ‘may’ have been a little closer to me that’s all.
So what are your thoughts about the over things I spoke about?
Hi Cris,
Harsh he-he… you have no idea:)
When you say he does not respond or make references to your words of love…. He already knows you love him… what he wants to know is…. what kind of love you have for him. Scorpio men love DEEPLY, in the true sense of what love IS. It goes way beyond sex, and way beyond jokes and laughing together and generally ‘having a good time’. Before he invests his emotional energy in a relationship with you… he needs to know that you are an emotionaly stable and aware woman, and that you know yourself.
So… would you still love him if he withdraws? Would you still love him when he is in one of his ‘moods’? Would you still love him when he is not around to offer you support? Would you still love him when there is no sex?
I am sure that you have all that in you. He has to see it. He sounds like a man who knows himself enough. He needs that in you too.
Cris,
You are wondering why he suddenly mentions some girl at work… This is the wrong question to ask yourself. Can you remember how it made you FEEL when he said this to you? You said you were amused at first, but you spent the whole day thinking about it… how did it feel? Were you jealous? Did it make you upset? If so….then ask yourself why…. this is what a Scorpio man does NOT need in his woman, this feeling of insecurity and being unsure. If you are not sure of him by being jealous – he cannot be sure of your TRUST in him. And he wants to see the trust in you.
Emotional stability, remember?
A highly evolved Scorpio man would never play this kind of game to elicit an emotional response. I cannot say if your guy really had someone at work fancy him, or if he made it up. It depends on his level of evolution.
Hi Cris,
Ummm a guy, but that does not mean that I can perhaps offer some experiences to you.
Hmmm…I feel that you have to explore how much you love yourself first. And see if that is compatible with how you love him.
There is so much missing from your post. We are hearing the effect of the relationship on you, and you not having any effect on the relationship at all. I mean…are you actually loving the guy, or are you just in love with him?
How do you define “I am loving the guy”? It is a verb and not just a state of being. You have to understand what it means to BE it.
There is a difference. So, who are you and where do you fit in?
Are you aware of what it means to “transform” life energy, through love?
“How do you define “I am loving the guy”?”
“So, who are you”
Yep, cut to the chase… this is what your guy REALLY wants to know, and until YOU can truly answer those…
Hi P.Puppy,
We are certainly missing your view on things!!!
And I miss you!
So I hope that you can also comment.
Hey guys I appreciate you taking the time to reply further. Well I feel I’m ‘in love’ with him but want to actually love him if I get the chance to get close enough for a longer period of time. When he told me about the girl at work, I didn’t spend all day thinking about, it just dawned me that he doesn’t ‘normally’ share ‘that’ much info about his everyday life, hence why I went deep into thought about it and stupidly started analysing EVERYTHING and started reading into a lot of other things he had said. I just feel confused as to how I should handle things. I’m not usually a jealous kind of girl but I am with him, although I don’t show this to him. He said I’m like no other girl he’s ever met which I am still holding onto. I always try and support him music when I can and do him little favours here and there. I told him that I don’t want to lose his friendship if anything does go wrong with us, he said I never have to worry about that as I’m the only girl he can see himself ending up with.
Earlier today out a generic message to view some backstage footage of some music videos which he was filming. I didn’t reply to this as it wasn’t only for my benefit (i think) Although i was going to watch it anyway.So then around 10 minutes later he asked if i had watched it (which is NOT like him atal) This made me want to watch it straight away,so I watched it & in a few clips he was filming a bunch of girls talking to him which made me feel only ‘slightly’ jealous surprisingly. So I am wondering ‘why’ he followed up his message asking if I had watched it? Maybe I’m over analysing again.
I don’t pester him and let him have his space although I do send the occasional message letting him know that I’m still here.
Hi Cris,
Am feeling you a bit more:
Well I feel I’m ‘in love’ with him but want to actually love him if I get the chance to get close enough for a longer period of time
This is how you define “loving him”?
1. stupidly started analysing EVERYTHING and started reading into a lot of other things he had said.
2. I just feel confused as to how I should handle things.
3. He said I’m like no other girl he’s ever met which I am still holding onto.
4. I always try and support him music when I can
do him little favours here and there.
5. I told him that I don’t want to lose his friendship if anything does go wrong with us
Yeah, I understand the confusion. It is like you have no idea where this guy is coming from.
Are you alright with doing things stupidly, being confused, not pestering, holding on, always trying, doing little favors and not wanting to loose his friendship?
There are no right or wrong answers…it will depend on who you are. I really don´t want to interfere in your relationship, as you have to realize that you are with him and not with us.
He will definitely have his own ideas, I am sure.
So again, “Who are you”?
Cris,
“So I am wondering ‘why’ he followed up his message asking if I had watched it?”
What do you yourself feel? Did you say to yourself – he wanted me to see him with girls, i.e. make me jealous…. OR
Did you say to yourself – he is sharing himself with me.
If you felt the first – you really need to have a look at WHY you are feeling insecure, because this is REALLY what it is about, as well as your ‘overanalysing’ of everything. And then comes that big question that Gatubela has just asked you.
Also, Cris…
“He said I’m like no other girl he’s ever met which I am still holding onto.”
Do YOU yourself feel that you are like no other girl? IF he or anybody else never says this to you – will you still feel like that beautiful unique girl?
Insecurity. Do you love YOU first?
It appears he’s thrown a few mortal tests at you Cris, to see if you will “fight” for him. Depending purely on his level of inner-evolution, those tests may be good for both of you… in terms of each of you “being” (not thinking) autonomous with your emotions, and staying creative within your own respective lives.. and.. each of you being “detached” on healthy individual levels as to not get devoured by fixed obsessions with each other. There’s a very thin line between a fixed/dark Scorpionic obsession — which constitutes turbulent jealousies, and an autonomous detached loving devotion. You’ll have to evoke some kind of response by him, to discern if you are in a real and true Faithful devotion, which through the energy of your relationship is much higher and much more powerful than his material/image reality of happiness could ever conceive.
So that thin line will need to be discussed and communicated with an open heart between both of you, not just you. There has to be “a felt admiration” of loyalty, trust and exclusivity between one another ON SPIRITUAL PLANES of awareness/consciousness… Versus… ‘just hoping’ that any dialogue of trust of an egotistical nature, meaning… the musical work he is obviously in love with, the social image and successes he is applying and presenting at you and people in the material world, MAY TAKE FIRM PRECEDENT… OVER…. a focused and spiritually brave love for you as a special woman and the relationship itself. This orientation of his “real love” is a huge distinction you must seek and discern concerning your dynamic… that is, if you want the truth.
It’s OK that he’s “in love” with his work and social appeal. I’m not saying that is a concern for you. What I am saying is… What is he made of, beyond that?? Does he take a stand for loving you, while “busy”??… Does he have the desire, the spiritual moxie and intent TO MAKE HIMSELF THERE FOR YOU… regardless of how busy he is with his music and popularity among women??
“There for you”, means — There in Soul. If spiritually life/death evolved, he would demonstrate brave intentions to penetrate a truth of REAL LOVE. Does he make time to use those energies of truth with you?
You have to remember from a deep soul consciousness… that his words of “how many kids do you want”… and… ” he said I never have to worry about that as I’m the only girl he can see himself ending up with.”
For now sweetheart… they are just words. Keeping an open heart means confronting the possibility and suspicion he is not backing up his words, with true and devoted sharing, giving, vulnerability with YOU as a person, and not an audience. Remember, from an ego perspective… the music/movie industry SEEKS AN AUDIENCE. (Approval from the outside, not the inside). So from plain, unevolved levels, he may be seeking your “love” for his creative talents… and not for him as a grounded, eternal soul. That is very important to understand.
If… you have witnessed and felt an energy from him which is/has been devoted… and to an extent, vulnerable with you… then they are wholesome deeds/feelings you can trust. If he hasn’t shown real genuine energies with you… unfortunately, that means both of you are living in an illusion of ego separated love. Which means, he is in love solely with his love of career, and you with ‘blind hopes’ that he loves you unequivocally — which is a massively common deception in relating.
Well, he is sharing himself through that material plane, seeking admiration from Cris through his work… but how would she feel that DEVOTED energy and his vulnerable side? Remember she said “it’s like getting blood out of a stone”…. How does it manifest itself?
Blood from a stone is not a great sign. It tells me he could well exist in the very common reality of stagnation and indifference about her and soul-intimacy with her. That’s why I had suggested she’ll have to face Hades (the energy) and “evoke” some kind of feeling out of him. That way she can “know where he stands, and what he truthfully stands for… even if that means he does not stand for her and the relationship.
“Passion” in the Scorpionic psyche is a beautiful thing… but what Cris needs to really discern is if that passion of his is a basic egotistical passion stemming from his musical and sexual appeal with other women… OR is his passion/desire IN LIFE something much more than that?… Is his “core-being” something greater than survival, popularity and earthly opportunity?.. = Animal-self.
Hopefully he can “respond” with manifestations of passion toward her (regardless if negative) that way she can ‘feel’ his underworld intent to fight for real intimacy. Again, blood from a stone, in my world… tells me an energy of indifference about her.
Levels of Scorpionic relating, really means… What depth level of PERSONAL INTIMACY is that person prepared to go?
Most are simply too afraid “to go there”. Hence mortal, ego-created havens and mind-sanctuaries to avoid that –> ancient Fear (of Truth).
Hmmm…. you haven’t really answered HOW the devoted energy and his willingness to be open and vulnerable would manifest itself in REAL life… Yes, a negative reaction and his Hades is better than none, because it allows to delve into the depths of his feelings for her and see if he is prepared to make himself available for true and honest communication… and Cris has to be prepared for a possible rejection… But how would she do that? Ask him honestly what his feelings are for her? I would if I was in that same situation…
Do you feel that an ‘unevolved’ Scorpio man can change ‘within’ the relationship if he loves the woman enough? I say ‘enough’ because he may not even know it himself at that stage….
Cold here… I am driving to Ireland tomorrow… Happy Christmas to you, darling, and to all those reading.
Wow guys, thank you for your detailed comments. I feel I have a few trust issues and ‘some’ insecurities with him because my last boyfriend continuously lied. I also feel my Scorp has been there for me emotionally whenever I’ve needed to talk to him about what’s going on in my life.
After reading all you’ve written I feel more confused than before. So how can I evoke these ‘feelings’ of his, I’m confused as to how I would go about this to be honest. I knew what I was getting myself involved in before I reciprocated my Scorps feelings so I feel prepared for whatever the outcome and am willing to ‘play’ along with his tests.
I ‘think’ he is scared to commit because he’s protecting himself from being hurt. I only say this cause of a comment he made which kind stuck with me.
“I also feel my Scorp has been there for me emotionally whenever I’ve needed to talk to him about what’s going on in my life.”
Cris, I feel that listening to your problems or what goes on in your life does not really mean ‘being there emotionally’. Not in terms of a relationship… Being there emotionally means being honest about his feelings for you and willing to admit them.
Play along with his tests… hmmm. so you are letting yourself in for the deception of it.
Hi Cris,
Scorpio´s don´t really play…even if they are unevolved, they are not all of a sudden, less serious about themselves or their lower or higher natures.
He has depths that perhaps you are unaware of…so, you can´t evoke anything, if you feel that any current form of comunication and search for depth (or his tests) are viewed by you as “games to play along with”…
Hmmm…meeting Hades underworld energy was the point.
Evoking anything may be the “eyebrow raising” pleasant consequences for a scorpio guy, when a woman does that and is able to give him the tickles.
“So how can I evoke these ‘feelings’ of his, I’m confused as to how I would go about this to be honest. ”
Well bunny, you’re not getting any forthcoming clarity by being passive. Stagnation means being mutually passive. Passive indifference means a mutual subconscious fear (of the ego bubble popping). Without directness and without willingness TO ENGAGE between you, both of you will be lost and confused in the abyss, as you are right now.
Relating to me… is all about relating. Not wondering. Not doubting. Not guessing. Not suppressing. Not denying. Not lying.
Feel it this way. If you were confused before and are more confused now, bunny confusion is apparent because you are not relating to the present energy. You must feel the power and truth of a present moment when relating. If you fail to identify that present real-lating energy as described in the above paragraph… you’ll be forever lost in the unknown.
How do we make the unknown, known?
We simplify.
We connect energetically in the present moment. Dig up the Truth Cris. Because if you ‘actually know’ his Truth… your soul would not doubt him right here, by seeking our counsel. Simplify your fuzzy blur. Ask. Hear. Feel. Then repeat cycle.
All real courage manifest, is by feeling what questions will evoke the killer answers you need.
Bunnies are not Warriors. They are Worriers. LoL, I empathize with you. He is supposed to pump you full of Hades. Not maybes.
Hi Cris,
“All real courage manifest, is by feeling what questions will evoke the killer answers you need.”
Look at everything you wrote… what is it REALLY that you are trying to ask… about your guy and about your relationship? Feel what it is that you want to know. Do not concentrate on ‘why he did this’ and ‘why he said that’… you are taking away from the truth…
Once you REALLY know the right questions – take them to your guy “Simplify your fuzzy blur. Ask. Hear. Feel. Then repeat cycle.” This will take you to the TRUTH, which is currently unknown to you.
Why is it about real courage… you have to face his truth even if it may not resonate with you… Can you do that?
Yes, you will literally need “to plug in” to the energy of him… no, I don’t mean levitating sex.
Use that divine womanly intuition of yours. Tap into feelings much greater than your logical social conditioning and fear. University Degrees won’t help you with plugging into the existence of people, as they see it, as they feel it, in the moment. Nor will your nice paycheck or chatty girlfriends help you plug in to a feeling beyond fear.
Concentrate intensely on a subject as the laser bird does. The Eagle. That acute laser feeling and vision is RECEIVED and simplified in the moment beyond the known rationale of stuff chaotically happening.
Banal chit-chat, fancifully arguing about nothing real, posturing and having fun about social/things, image and ego expectancy through asleep manipulating tactics, again… is ‘not tuning-in’ to the real motivations hidden under the personality. The Higher-mind is unknown in that baaah state.
You have to know yourself, your psychological flakiness, distractions, attachments and attractions ‘to stuff’ frivolously happening around you while wanting the feeling of the moment. I have preached the importance of a slowing down the speedy brain-anxiety, stilling the mind and feeling a brave heart while engaging. Whereas, no awareness or failing to use those spiritual resources will cause you more grief, worry and confusion.
I can’t force your limitations. All I can do is show you them.
Hi Cris,
Concentrating as an eagle, is a huge subject all on its own.
It requires quieting your mind, listening to your own energies and hearing that little vioce.
Eventually, you will receive “the intel”..
However, that does not mean that you are doing it right.
In order to understand how to “evoke” you must learn unconditional LOVE for yourself.
All scorpios can concentrate. You have not seen your BF do this?
Persephone’s out there, our soul path is planned in the scheme of the universe.
http://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/a/-/world/12425137/model-s-death-blamed-on-cancelled-date/
I am only seeing my Scorp, he is not my bf yet and who knows if that will happen. I ‘think’ I have understood everything you’ve said so now i just have to realise the question I want to ask him about our ‘relationship’ or whatever it is and be willing to face the truth.I just have to wait it out so he see’s me on his terms as that is always the way it is.
I think you are right that do I love myself first. I think I have to work on myself!
Hi Cris,
Well…let us try to go beyond “think”…lol
My son has a lot of aries energy…and they are pretty firey as well!
So…can you feel your fire? This is your mars energy. It will come up at certain times!
What do you get angry at?
Jupiter trines pluto on a holiday! 🙂
May you have a bountiful and plutonic Christmas lol!
Happy Holidays to all!!
My cancer moon and venus in cancer talking here…along with my best wishes for 2012.
Hi Cris,
Was just feeling you again.
What happens when their greatest strength is actually their greatest weakness?
Have you every felt plutonic energy? Well, it has a tendency to get to the very core parts of people. If not purified, and scorpio is engaged into you, it can be converted into a sense of intense worrying. The sensation is actually tortuous…waking up during the middle of the night and feeling like something is “mocking you”, with even the sense of nightmares. Fears… This is combined with a sense of failure, felt right at the soul level. Meaning, for scorpio, failure is perceived as wounding their soul.
Scorpionic wounds do not heal easily, and especially when women fail to see divinity. Pluto only let´s the pure walk through its gates, and the rest will have their negativity magnified. So, if scorpio is unevolved, all fears, failures and guilts, if there, will actually be manifested. It will become REAL to them in a way that no one else can perceive. It is like we are here to face our inner demons…literally.
So, for example, the post related what Ines said can be simplified into a question… “Does she really love me?”
You see, women´s sexuality for scorpio is actually perceived as “darkness” and they can easily connect with it, in order to satisfy their desires…and yours!
It can be seen as an act of “love” or not.
WOW, thanks for that post. I am starting to have a better understanding now! I wonder if he feels all these things though?
I may be seeing my Scorp tonight. I feel as though I need a guide to tell me what to do (stupid I know) I have all these emotions I’ve never experienced and feel as though I don’t know what to do with them.
You are not an easy one to love, Eagle… Do you want to know what it is like on the other side? A complete inner nakedness… which feels like being under the cold blue strip light of an operating theatre… where no object is allowed to cast a shadow anymore, and every atom of one’s being is exposed… Examination is complete, but never final, with nothing beyond and above questioning, no stone unturned and no secret safely stowed away…. No wading through the fogs and mists of ‘us’ issues, no guesswork, no intent to conceal… The price of total REAL INTIMACY is allowing total VULNERABILITY of self… does it ever feel the same on your side? What would you feel standing face to face with the Creator? Time and space is of no consequence any more… all that’s left is bittersweet exposure of today – morphing into exposure of tomorrow, forever and ever.
A state of being where NOTHING is separating the two… can it be sustained for eternity and can the totality of it BECOME? That in itself gives the feeling of falling into a never ending vortex… A mortal digresses and stumbles… is that forgiven? Eagle, it is A LOT to ask of the mortal… unless the mortal transcended and cannot BE any other way.
A complete and unconditional surrender to BEING.
“You are not an easy one to love..”
My continuous evolution hasn’t made it easier. I truly want my equal. But I haven’t found her. That girl is too busy playing, giggling and wiggling her backside. Or… she’s a zombie inside, lifeless… regardless of her powerful sexuality and beauty over the male sex.
“Do you want to know what it is like on the other side?..”
The other side is a place I call home. I am comfortable in there, among the occult of existence. Superficial yapping and subjective separation in culture when interacting actually makes me feel queasy and trapped. I’m serious.
“..no stone unturned and no secret safely stowed away…. No wading through the fogs and mists of ‘us’ issues, no guesswork, no intent to conceal… The price of total REAL INTIMACY is allowing total VULNERABILITY of self..”
Yes. Also known as — Spiritual War. It’s the desire to kill, and die, for core transformation. Real Love comes with a price. That price for me has been my evolution among society. People only comprehend a fraction of my soul.
“The price of total REAL INTIMACY is allowing total VULNERABILITY of self… does it ever feel the same on your side?..”
If I was alien to vulnerability, you would not be feeling this way. Emotional IQ and eternal consciousness also comes with a price. It is the price of facing the illusion/demons of ones outer life and revering the vulnerable inner life/death.
“..What would you feel standing face to face with the Creator?..”
The creator is not a noun. You have felt the Creator via my dimensions manifest, by virtue if my existential soul-being.
“A state of being where NOTHING is separating the two… can it be sustained for eternity and can the totality of it BECOME?..”
Well of course. You have witnessed the truth of becoming in your self as you have reflected AND FELT what is real between separation and eternity. I have shown you this contrast by penetrating you with this becoming by being still waters run deep …and expansive.
“A mortal digresses and stumbles… is that forgiven?…”
Of course it is forgiven. Imagine how I must adapt within the mess and confines of this human society? I have to show people what they could understand — the superficial of survival and image, the separate, and the meaningless.
“..it is A LOT to ask of the mortal… unless the mortal transcended and cannot BE any other way…”
That’s right. Now you get an inkling of what the reality of this life is like for me. As stated in the past… I fully accept the plight and path of baby souls. I was not born to grapple with other people and change their survival lies, their path “to succeed” within their physical body. They are in essence… their manifestations of each breath, thought, expression and desire. The divine made it that way for humans. Because eternal lessons are right here in the moment for all of us, if we were bestowed to BE those gifts in the first place.
I’ve read this on a ferry across the choppy Irish sea, how fitting…”Now you get an inkling of what the reality of this life is like for me” ah no, darling… the inkling happened WEEKS ago when I was still fighting you… now it is the BEING of me… the coming HOME. It is IMPOSSIBLE to go back now. It is like the jigsaw pieces fell into place, and the picture is just there, revelation after revelation… everything written here is not a ‘flowery language’ anymore, because I FELT it and reflected on it. There will be more to come I know…
“I have to show people what they could understand — the superficial of survival and image, the separate, and the meaningless.” “I was not born to grapple with other people and change their survival lies, their path “to succeed” within their physical body.”
Well, I’ve tried…. ONLY possible with those who started looking… who ASKED the right question, usually as a result of pain and suffering… The rest will laugh at best… Remember, six months ago I was looking for the Oneness, but didn’t know what that was, I was looking for love, but didn’t feel REAL love, I was thinking myself and life meaningless, and I went searching, without knowing. All I had was a restless feeling that there is MORE… The seed was already there, you have ‘ploughed the field’ and let it take root… do you understand that, Eagle?
And then I go to spend Christmas with the Irish side of family and someone I’ve known for years… The minute I mentioned THIS, she KNEW…. because 15 years ago she went through that same thing. I knew about her spirituality, someone who walked away from Catholicism (and that is saying something for the Irish)… you see I wasn’t ready back then… Everything happens for a reason… She said to me ‘Every time I stepped to the next plane – I felt incredible loneliness. Feel it and accept it – it will pass shortly… This is now a continuous process, it will not stop. You are not alone’. This step up is certainly what it is like for me, accumilative, when something suddenly happens inside… but it may be different for others…
I don’t feel lonely or overwhelmed or sad or happy… I just AM. I feel an incredible sense of balance… and being a part of something bigger than myself… And every time something threatens to knock it – I pull this energy up and… merge it, there is no other word to describe it really, I wish I could…
Eagle, have you ever read Martin Buber ‘I and Thou’? I couldn’t grasp it in the past, now it just resonates.
““..What would you feel standing face to face with the Creator?..”
Wow…what a question! It actually made me feel a bit teary.
Do we stand face to face? or do we surrender to these incredible energies?.
It is like the energy finds you, and it definitely wants to be found.Is it felt in our hearts? A great experience would be if everything melts away and you feel love. A different kind of love…
It feels as if you would give your soul to be there. And then something incredible happens…through the very act of vulnerability and surrender, the creator finds you, and gives you Oneness.
It would be such a profound experience, that everything you “felt” before, now “feels” lifeless.
Anyways P.Puppy, I hope you find her. She will certainly be blessed.
“Do we stand face to face? or do we surrender to these incredible energies?…”
Yep. That’s the creator, or source of divinity– a mind energy — Surrender. That word has layer upon layer upon layer of meaning within human spiritual and evolutionary contexts. The ego-personality is oblivious to such death (change) and resurrection of mind capacity, and the intelligence of our beating heart. The perilous journey slayed and discovered through our Shadow and the Valley of Death… is the ultimate intangible lesson for such awakenings. A victorious confrontation felt of all that is terrifying and addicting within us, and the cruelty seen in others, teaches the heart what is pure and important, it teaches the conscience what is to be fought for, and the subsequent surrender teaches us the divine meaning of humane, soulful, compassion for the fucked-up-ness in human beings. It teaches us the transcendent meaning of self-love.
Once a human of becoming manifests this state ‘of being’ through that loving vision, that human understands emotional life, the feelings possible IN people and the wisdom possible IN the chaotic world around him/her.
I just felt a lightning bolt with these four words written in 1450, their energies.
“They (mortal reality) are in essence… their manifestations of each breath, thought, expression and desire”.
1) Breath = throat = Taurus
2) Thought = mind = Aquarius
3) Expression = heart = Leo
4) Desire = sex base = Scorpio
It just occurred to me those 4 signs are on the Fixed Cross on the Evolutionary wheel. Sorry guys… the nutty lunatic in me comes out when I discover symbols and meanings through the magnificence of astrology. Those minds and hearts of the ancient people feel like family to me.
When we are literally whole, our being is the synthesis of all 12 signs. Nothing within our existence is separate or bias or stagnant.
“When we are literally whole, our being is the synthesis of all 12 signs. Nothing within our existence is separate or bias or stagnant.”
Is this the aim of enlightenment – merging all 12 energies to become whole, where none are missing and none are ignored in favour of another type, i.e. physical in preference to thought, or thought in preference to desire etc. etc. Happens all too often in real life…. All equally needed…
Those you mentioned are all Fixed signs… what about the rest? It is a cross all right, but others (cardinal and mutable) would form one too… How is that significant? Do these fixed signs constitute the human core? what about the other eight?
Please explain.
There’s definitely ample virtue and vice among the symbolism of the other 8 signs as there are with the four fixed signs mentioned. Fixed energy… exists in the middle. It’s CENTERED between Cardinal energy (manifestation) and Mutable energy (manifestation). I’m lucky.. because Pisces is ‘the last’ sign on the evolutionary wheel. So with my Pisces rising, anyone who understands the fundamentals of astrology, intuitively knows that Pisces ruling the first house (the first house is the domain of Aries, new beginnings, trail blazin’ “the self”)… means “a completion”… if you will… on the soul level. Because Pisces, sign 12 = Death of ego… which FLUXES with house/sign 1, Aries domain = Birth of ego-self. Anyone get that?
That’s a very simplistic explanation of my natal chart. There are thousands of other components, symbiotic meanings which culminate ME as a soul person. For example… yes, I’m a Scorpio Sun with 4 other planets brewing in Scorpio… but… much OF MY NATURE also synthesizes and manifests Sagittarian INFLUENCES… because my Sun, Venus, Neptune and North Node are located in the fun loving 9th House of the Higher-mind = Sagittarius’ House. Pluto, the God of Intense & Dark, RULES my 9th house of Higher mind, which is Scorpio ruling my 9th House cusp.
One other important ingredient in relation to my lunatic nature… is my Moon in the 11th house = Animal Instincts (Moon) while detached and objective for the ‘collective pulse’ of humanity (Aquarius’ house, the 11th). PLUS. Uranus… the planet of lightning genius… percolates’ next to (conjunct) Mars-Warrior and my Mercury-Messenger of the Gods in my 8th House. The 8th house is the most intense, the most tormented, the most depth riddled, the most murky and vulnerable house in astrology, but it can also bestow the most liberating transformations in ones life, depending on what planets are in there, and what we do with that extreme energy on conscious levels, or as people are most commonly… on unconscious levels. Uranus has just crossed my Ascendant… so in many respects… the nutty stuff I have been transmitting to you guys is a product of Uranus crossing the ascendant, which means… for a few years… my mind-detachment (Uranus) to the known world is sent out (expressed) to you all as if I were an Aquarius Rising.
Ya see?… The three outer planets are most powerful if they are understood and mastered in our individual lives. Because Uranus, Neptune and Pluto MOVE THE SLOWEST. They are Trans-societal heavenly bodies. In other words guys… They are invisible to the being of human consciousness. Those three planets, LITERALLY CONTROL the plight of masses of people UNCONSCIOUSLY. Hence the flaws, pain, confusion and imperfection of humanity.
There’s so much more to it. That’s just a sampler. I don’t want to muddle people with this language. All 12 signs in synthesis make us whole. That is deep stuff, if people would know the infinite meanings associated with each sign, house and planet and THEIR RELATIONSHIP in our minds and hearts. Our existence among other humans.
Hi P.Puppy,
People will understand once they see the relevance of certain energies in their lives.
For example, I don´t understand astrology, but something about it, resonates, in the “unexplainables” and “unknowns” in my life, and my search for an explanation, that any religion simply does not explain.
For example, that famous question “Who pissed in her cornflakes?”…someone you know has radically changed their behavior, out of the blue, and they were fine yesterday. Religion gives us a rather separatist explanation aligned with how we have to probably do a couple of mea culpas. lol
Astrology actually asks us to be tolerant and understanding, and examine ourselves.
I mean, everyone feels something, when they look at the moon. And it does not take a genious to feel the importance of the sun. But are we able to put our “feelings” into astrological symbolism?
The moon makes us “feel”….
When I see a sunset, “I feel”… ( here you may even feel a bit of earth, or water, or air or fire. It feels like something on the outside, is resonating with us, through our emotions and we feel it in our hearts?)
I know…pretty silly sometimes, but you should try it. It is like there is something there.
Also, everyone can feel an “aries” person…but does individuality come any spiritual lessons? Well, yeah! Working with “fire”! Your will power, creativity as expressed through your battles and sense of self. A person can master their own energy and give back to others, who are learning about themselves too.
I feel that all the signs have “gifts” to offer the world. Like we have a “pathway” of the universe, in ourselves, to enlightenment.
Meditation and not understanding ourselves, is just a mind calmer. Going to church and merging with those energies, may not make you closer to God. We may have a bunch of sermons to read in the bible or how to books, but something is missing.
WE HAVE TO KNOW OURSELVES.
Also, astrology is a more then anything we have seen in the internet by the way. lol…
You are right, if people only knew what the planets have been trying to tell us. It is part of the “ALL”…
What I would love to see, is the astrology of the cosmos…lol. Something more than just our solar system. What universal secrets are available, once we know ourselves.
“Going to church and merging with those energies, may not make you closer to God.”
“We may have a bunch of sermons to read in the bible or how to books, but something is missing.”
It really depends on HOW you go to church… but for me it is DEAD. I went to mass on Christmas eve, simply to see if after recent events it will at all resonate with me… nope… as far removed as possible from what I feel now… I now understand the message of Christianity, but just don’t feel that making a visionary (Christ) into what effectively is a cul followingt is doing the spiritual message any favours. He was NOT about that at all and he would be appalled… And the rituals… God, most people in the church themselves have NO IDEA of the true meaning… addicted to the form, and not knowing the substance…
“the nutty lunatic in me comes out when I discover symbols and meanings through the magnificence of astrology. ”
It is not a nutty lunatic in you, darling…. it is your inner child…. a newly uncovered mystery can be exciting and difficult to contain… it has to be shared. Remember how it was when you were a kid? I certainly feel you as such at times. It’s just that now discoveries are adult in scope.
Out
The human body forms a cross…. we are talking about four MAIN support systems: brain, digestive, circulation and reproductive… bloody hell
hmmm…. astrology as a representation of the human body and the energies that govern it? What do you feel about that? I feel near some major breakthrough, just can’t quite place my finger on it… there is more to it than just symbolism… something much more real…
“..there is more to it than just symbolism… something much more real…”
Oh Yes. Astrology is marvelously real. Don’t take my word for it.;)
Muddle… that was certainly an overkill:) please keep it simple for now
“Uranus has just crossed my Ascendant… so in many respects… the nutty stuff I have been transmitting to you guys is a product of Uranus crossing the ascendant”
and where, tell me, does it leave you as a ‘free agent’? If all your ‘moves’ are due to the passing of the planets? Or you believe there is no such thing?
I am not that advanced in astrology. I know it works, because I observed it, I don’t understand why… If someone could show why…. they would win a Nobel prize…
Does anyone know how to determine planets in houses…. I don’t know where mine are.
“and where, tell me, does it leave you as a ‘free agent’? If all your ‘moves’ are due to the passing of the planets? Or you believe there is no such thing?..”
Planets are moving Ines. The Sun is also moving. Planets are orbiting the Sun at different speeds and from different arcs. Just as your skin is aging, so is the universe… on relative planes of course. This constant energy or movement of everything is expanding and shrinking, just like woman’s hips do LOL!!…so my point is, all energy is impermanent. It is living then dying, living then dying… and on and on.
Your natal chart is where the planets were precisely positioned when you had taken your first breath and physically popped out from mom’s womb and into this crazy world. You’d have to know your ‘Time of birth’ to get an accurate “map” of where your soul was/is while entering this life.
Eagle, the planets are moving, so yes, the energy is changing all the time, although as a whole of the Universe it is constant, it does not disappear, just is replaced by different forms and at different locations… but I was asking IF this is the ONLY determinant of us… I guess I am asking about that question of free will… I certainly feel at times more firery of more collected or more reflective or more emotional etc. etc. do I still choose my path in the grand scheme of things? Or the path choooses me? (and the same for the rest of us)
I know my time of birth. Cafe Astrology website gave me a birth chart, which says Zodiac AND Placidus, what is Placidus? The houses seem to be in it….
The stars impel, they do not compel… how does that go with you manifesting you as Aquarius Rising…
“..do I still choose my path in the grand scheme of things? Or the path choooses me? (and the same for the rest of us)..”
Well that all depends on your sensitivity and capacity of “being awake” or flipping through life asleep. Whether you believe this or not, when you look into the eyes of strangers doing their redundant thing around you… they are unconscious of forces, energies, way beyond them. So to answer your question… the path chooses you at birth, then during conscious or unconscious CHOICE… however… your free-will to choose “while awake” can bring you closer to the Source = Your Soul. Which means soulful love.
The material hustle has it’s place in the scheme of your life… but those choices in the material does not equate to people being awake. It’s far more like they are sleeping through life. That’s as far as I will go to explain this abstract reality. Explaining worlds of the unseen and the infinite does it no justice in the written word.
You have to experience it, to know it.
Well, not abstract for me anymore, but…
“Explaining worlds of the unseen and the infinite does it no justice in the written word.”
There, this is what made it so impossibly difficult. I waded through tons of expressions on here describing what is called ‘phenomenological’ event(experience as one feels it at a given moment in time). As I said to Gatubela how do you describe a headache to someone who has never experienced it, they will never understand….
Let’s see….
the Truth in the present breath = speak exactly how you feel at any given moment in time
baby soul = someone who doesn’t perceive love energy or their own energetic field, someone unaware of their mortal limitations
politically bent = influenced by the accepted societal belief systems, nothing to do with ‘politics’
the Unknown = anything concealing the Truth, innermost motivations , fears unknow to self, or something yet to happen which people fear
the Source = mind energy = soul. “That’s the creator, or source of divinity– a mind energy — Surrender.”
Why couldn’t you say it LIKE THAT before? It would have sunk in faster. Although it doesn’t matter any more because I have felt the PRESENCE and realised it was ME. But imagine saying this to anyone who hasn’t… what comes to mind is ‘lunatic’… and even if I tried to say ‘mind energy’… they wouldn’t get it, because they will perceive it as being about ‘thinking’… what a dilemma… no language for the most important part of our development.
The Source… the sheer SIMPLICITY of the concept is mind blowing… so tell me please why it is shrowded im mystery, why do people look and don’t ‘get’ it, it so divinely obvious… Religions are based on this, yet they make it as complicated as it can be… Why can it not be simplified, because it IS SIMPLE? It is frustrating, as if someone is deliberately concealing this from the masses behind difficult texts and own interpretations. I HATE that. It feels like a conspiracy…
And your facination with the symbolism of expression makes it no easier…
“the path chooses you at birth” = your natal chart
Yes, babies are not born ‘tabula rasa’, how many discussions have I had with people over that… Every mother with a few children will tell how behaviourally different they were from the moment of birth….
“then during conscious or unconscious CHOICE… however… your free-will to choose “while awake” can bring you closer to the Source = Your Soul.”
That’s when a person wakes up from the slumber of everyday existence (yeah, there must have been some nasty stuff in their prior life to give them a kick in the posterior) and actively CHOOSES to search = free will = conscious choice
How is that with the UNCONSCIOUS choice then?
I am looking for something to disagree with you on – and can’t find it… it’s too cosy in here now:)
Hi Ppuppy,
Do you also feel the effect of the moon transit? Moon is one of the fastest moving planets. Now the moon is in Pisces sigh… for some reason I feel happy and contented about the life I see in me though around me seems lifeless as Gatubela mentioned in comment 1449. I used to get very emotional and it is a pain to be around with people so I prefer to hide.
I have this tendency to feel the feelings of other people and sometimes merge when confronted. I can feel their sufferings and pain even at a distance and experience it emotionally. If I perceive anger or revenge it makes me sick like literally ughh… I feel restless….. So I thought it was a curse…
Astrologically my moon in pisces in 6th and 7th explains my emotional sponge nature. I am also learning astrology (my past time at work lol) So slowly I got better understanding about my own energies and I’ve realized it is not actually a curse! It has been my guardian angel protected me and guided me since child… so am looking after my energies and hoping to use it for higher purpose… Any advice from your side? I still get overwhelmed…
Love,
Mari
Hi Mari,
I don’t feel the day-to-day moods of the Moon instinct defining, or influencing my free-will now. In my past? yes.. the changing tides of my feelings would have a controlling influence over me, but not now. Why?… Because my nature has died and re-birthed too many times over TO NOT NOTICE that fear within myself. You have to understand… I feel my fears per breath now, thanks to being awake and liberated in a strong-mind individuality. Many years of my past were not expressed or lived in True individual free-will. I was at the mercy of my ambivalence then. Because I was not put together from the inside. My willpower was not discovered and harnessed. My identity among the chaos and fearful energies of everyone around me was not “detached” and refined to choose of my own volition. My sense of self, as a Pisces rising, was the epitome of self-destruction, I was social osmosis swimming aimlessly downstream in my comforting illusions among other people’s dreams, vices and pseudo-identities and realities. That’s why I speak so strongly about the power of VICARIOUS INFLUENCE on this forum. Vicarious energy is a disease of the mind heart. It’s power is obvious when you see what impresses people. It’s so easy “to get caught up” in the crippling fears of others. Even if they present a happy face, you just know those people are hurting inside, they are loathsome, INDIFFERENT of their meaningless existence. Indifference in the personality of others is their weakness. Not yours.
“..so am looking after my energies and hoping to use it for higher purpose… Any advice from your side? I still get overwhelmed…”
Please don’t fear your capacity to feel. That is a gift you must always treasure. Being overwhelmed, simply means you are finding it difficult to psychologically and willfully DETACH the worries, pain and neurosis of other people and to cease making those manifested fears of others, your own. They are not your fears. A very important feeling of consciousness I receive in the Taurus psyche is this: Martyrdom. Be very careful sweetheart and observe the pain you soak up for others. Virgo psyche and Pisces psyche (nature) are two other archetypes who whip their backs in punishment for others. Don’t do that. It’s not healthy for your emotional evolution. I did that, I was that NON-DISCERNING sponge for many unconscious years of my life. There is nothing wrong with human compassion and empathy. What I am saying is, don’t let the weakness within others suck you dry to where you become weak and afraid yourself. That is not selfish. By being solid, discerning in your own emotional identity, you will heal and inspire others to stop feeling sorry for themselves and pulling others down with them. You’ll heal them through your detached yet soulful loving. So that’s a incisive part of self-mastery. We have to be strong and objective enough, in our divine sensitivity, so we can show the human race what sensitive power really means… and to show the abusive insensitivity running rampant through cold people, that they are in fact the weak and pathetic ones.
love
Puppy
Hi Mari,
I couldn’t have said it better than what is already here…
“So that’s a incisive part of self-mastery. We have to be strong and objective enough, in our divine sensitivity, so we can show the human race what sensitive power really means…”
Like you I used to soak everything up and make it MY OWN. But something happened recently… it is like an invisible shield around me. It doesn’t mean I don’t feel their plight, but those energies do not join mine. To do that, every time a situation arises, I have to CONSCIOUSLY remind myself of what I know now, and once I do – something pulls up inside of me and prevents me from joining in the misery of what you mention.
There may be times when it will be hard to do, a test of one’s ability to control own flow… I never thought of my sensitivities as a weakness, the opposite, but certainly used to get overwhelmed by it all and not knowing what to do with it. Gatubela once said :
“RAISE these energies as high (divine-like) and as pure as they can go, and put them in your HEART. It is what joins the darkness with the light, for me. If you don´t feel love after that, then don´t proceed. You will be just throwing your own darkness into the cycle,”
In other words, giving away your own energy without soulful discenment will only add to the vicious cycle of negativity. The power of mind, and that self mastery…
“How is that with the UNCONSCIOUS choice then?”
Haven’t you looked back into your past, reflected on the choices you had made, and thought to yourself… “what in grin-sins was I thinking?!?”… Here Ines, a few superficial examples: You dig up old photo albums, or old video of yourself, your friends, family and good times. What do you notice?…”Ohh blush!!… did I really wear my hair like that in the 80’s??”… “Did I actually believe spandex was sexy?!”… “Whoa!?…Did I really date that douche who I fell in love with and trusted, then actually LIVED WITH, then considered MARRYING and bearing his children!??”… “Oh crap, why was I SO BLIND to leave my sister at the park crying when she kissed that guy I LIKED??!!”… Grrrrr Unforgivable… stomp, scurry, stomp.
What’s my message here?
We have, ALL of us have made choices, thousands of them actually IN THE UNCONSCIOUS bubble of socioeconomic conformity. What was once considered fashionable, sexy, cute and appealing in that bubble, IS NOW… upon deeper feelings… realized as a farce, a lie TOWARD OURSELVES. But how how could we it was a lie, and that THEY lied??. Exactly. That’s my point. Unconscious choices. Unconscious societal pressures to conform. Unconscious behaviors which we change in a heart beat right now in the present breath, because we are AWAKE of our naivety. We are now awake of our foolishness and stupidity. Yeah?
Learning from the superficial whims and disillusionment in our life is the foundation for understanding deeper Truths. Our understanding on a mature and individual level accepts the bullshit we blindly chose to be a participant of. Nobody forced us to behave like blind bats. We just were.
“That’s the creator, or source of divinity– a mind energy — Surrender.”
Why couldn’t you say it LIKE THAT before? It would have sunk in faster.”
Because you NEEDED TO FEEL YOUR OWN FEARS and recognize them for what they were/are. Unconscious manifestations to hide. Hide from who you ask?… YOU. I made that happen via my natural killer nature. I dispersed some of my volcanic activity INSIDE YOU so you could feel what’s real. Not think what’s supposedly agreeing to your ego-egg. (relax I’m not calling you names, I’m describing).
You have to understand that SURVIVAL is the basis, as to why you made blind, naive, fearful choices in your life. = Human = Afraid = Asleep sheep. Baaaah.
I get it, darling. The choice is dictated by our conformity to the ‘norm’, without consciously realising it. What I called my ‘innocence’ in the past was actually ignorance of the dynamics of my existence in this survival orientated world = oblivious to the TRUE meaning of what is going on.
“(relax I’m not calling you names, I’m describing).” LOL you’ve made a concession to my mortal sensitive self… argh… no need, Eagle. I will KNOW when you ARE calling me names = when I am being fake… besides, my energy field is now not letting me go all ‘hypo’ over such trivia…
You’ve set the bar really high, no man will ever live up to it in my world… I don’t know whether I should choke you or kiss your feet… remember that Florence Scorpionic song ‘This is a gift, it comes with a price’… yeah
“I dispersed some of my volcanic activity INSIDE YOU so you could feel what’s real.”
Christ, the TRUE FEELING of this just hit me…this volcanic energy… Plutonic… people just DON’T HAVE that inside of them… and it is NOT dark at all, it is… pure and white hot and dying for honesty… Mine is NOTHING like that, nothing. Mine is like emerald green sea water, swooshing and swashing, it is not SEEKING, it is… dissolving…
I know now what Gatubela sees… oh it’s hard to put into words…
People find it hard to believe, but my son was astrologically planned… he-he before I decided it was time to procreate, I calculated when… I wanted another Piscean as he would be compatible with both myself and my ex….
He was ten days over, 20th of March, late in the evening and only a couple of hours from becoming an Aries… Moon and Ascendant in Scorpio, and year of the Pig (Scorpio too). I would highly recommend it, honestly. It works.
“There was a time when you let me know
What’s really going on below
But now you never show it to me, do you?
And remember when I moved in you
The holy dove was moving too
And every breath we drew was Hallelujah
Maybe there’s a God above
But all I’ve ever learned from love
Was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you
It’s not a cry you can hear at night
It’s not somebody who has seen the light
It’s a cold and it’s a broken Hallelujah”
The one who has felt those dimensions, has known life… Where IS that secret chord… where the mortal merges with the divine… why does love feel so miserable at times… It should be a purifying and elevating state, yet it feels a gut wrenching torturous hell…
So much for inner balance…
Symbols are a representation of a kind of energy. We all are tuned into this frequency at an unconscious level. Our reaction to “symbols” can actually be measured…all psychologists know this. These codes are actually in levels. And it can be studied, what codes can get which specific reaction .
Certain things stand out. And when they do, we can associate it with something. Hence , the universal “subconscious” language begins to emerge.
For example, it could be seen that astrological symbols are the energetic representation of the “energies of our body”…
So symbols are “energy”…
For most of us, we will enter a state of chaotic, non linear behavior..non sistematic, when we receive, a new “symbol” in our life, and we tire eventually of “the latest thing” or “that person”, once the energetic stimuli has run its effect.
Symbols…a very interesting thing to study. I used to write papers about them.
“the changing tides of my feelings would have a controlling influence over me, but not now.” – So you acted out on your feelings in the manner which was self destructing… why does it sound familiar… Did you make choices based on YOUR FEELINGS ONLY which brought you more pain? One cannot control how they feel, but can control what to do (or not to do) with those feelings…
When you say ‘choose of my own volition’… THAT is the easiest – not to bend to anyone’s expectations of me and what they think I am SUPPOSED to be doing or thinking or feeling… people around me know that by now, hence, a ‘one off’ attached to me.. it is also easy now to draw a line between my own being and that of what was fed to me from birth… However… Let’s say we are now aware of the external influences and choose not to be subjected to those. Let’s say we do not, from now on, soak up others’ feelings… “DETACH the worries, pain and neurosis of other people”…. but we still have our own, generated from within our psyche… Do you examine yours and decide which realm they belong to? And ‘bin’ them if necessary? Or convert them into something else? How the heck do you do that, darling? How?
Now, that you’ve transcended to a certain level… it took you four years to arrive at this point. Is there more? What is your final goal? A nirvana like state? To me the aim is NOT to kill the mortal, but to give the mortal access to divinity present from birth… I WANT to keep my mortal side, or else what life is? Without feelings, without pain, without joy? How does one reconcile those two sides? Please tell me. Eagle, we all need to eat…
I need to go on… to move on… there is MORE…
I guess the symbol of Pisces – two fishes swimming in the opposite direction, but tied by a cord – represents that conflict and NEED for reconciliation of mortal and divine = Death of Ego… so simple…
…Please don’t fear your capacity to feel. That is a gift you must always treasure…
Yes… I don’t fear my capacity to feel… it is a gift but at the same time it is a choice. So I choose to use it to disperse the love I feel inside… it’s like God, a being telling me that you now love yourself… you can start to love others in your own way. I have no problem empathizing to the pain and sufferings of others. My experiences has made more receptive and responsive to the pain of others. I can willfully detach. It gives me a better understanding about the person, listen to the honest vulnerabilities that appears in the dynamic and understand what completes the person. It does not drain me… actually I feel some sort of thrill and happiness doing it. It is my way of giving back to the universe.
I noticed that I get overwhelmed when I perceive anger and manipulation especially from a love one. Sometimes I need to retreat for a while and yah fully detach from outside world and cave in to my heart… purify my self… because I don’t want it to sink in… I think it really requires some level of self-mastery… it seems like dying is a way of life in order to master it. And Ppuppy I am learning a lot from your battles here. Thank you!!!!
Am quite determined to help my parents understand certain things … so am not giving up just yet… I just got a call from my sis today and it seems like things are moving at home… I got all good news… so I feel happy… it will take some time definitely not an over night thing but I feel that it is all worth it in the end…
I also think that in order to master it is to not fear to experience and test your limits. Like jumping blindfolded with only faith and pure intentions in your heart. It should start with soulful wants and needs. Following it and giving your best shot with no attachment to the outcome. I feel that it also helps overcome the worriers syndrome lol!
…Virgo psyche and Pisces psyche (nature) are two other archetypes who whip their backs in punishment for others…
hmmm No I don’t do that… I think it is my bull side that is able to say NO when it is NO! Bull stubbornness is not at all bad. It keeps my toughie side lol!
“RAISE these energies as high (divine-like) and as pure as they can go, and put them in your HEART. It is what joins the darkness with the light, for me. If you don´t feel love after that, then don´t proceed. You will be just throwing your own darkness into the cycle,”
Yes Ines… raising the energies as high as you can even during your darkest moments. Balancing your own energies even your whole world come crashing down. You can also fight with soulful intentions by putting the person in your heart and fight for what is best for him/her not yours. Martyrdom? No… there are just certain things that are worth fighting for and wars that have to end. You can only do this with love and pure intentions in your heart.
And also the warrior removes her warrior booties after the battle lol and find hobbies and passions that creates her own happiness instead of squeezing happiness from others. Though am guilty of squeezing happiness from my little bro lol! So BALANCE is the keyword… There is no problem in looking for potential partner but the relationship should be an expression of love and happiness for each other. Well… with scorpio it is touch with pain lol… but it is part of the beauty of it all! So for now am just thankful and grateful for each breath… I feel blessed for all the God incidents that happened to me….
By the way happy new year to all.. hugs!
love,
Mari
Gatubela,
I found this of yours while reading:
“Strange…when I feel my stillness, it feels like someone is inside of me…and it ain´t me! And I feel like someone is beside me on my right hand side. ”
Exactly!!!!!! And on the right hand side…. I just can’t believe this… So I am bloody sane after all;)
It is HARD to find that stillness though… oh so hard…
“It is HARD to find that stillness though… oh so hard…”
Hmmm…your comment was a real eye opener….
Well there is a price to pay for self discipline, mastering yourself and staying within your heart energies…and that is never betraying yourself, and WHAT IS TRUTH and REAL (very scorpio). That price is literally establishing a new way of living and loving, almost as a mico moment, within this huge dark collective society of ours.
Finding that stillness comes when facing truthes and consequences head on, and not running from them, under no circumstances.
Peace with your own soul, is the stillness, and it comes from having the courage to face ourselves and taking it “up to God”…
The reward for facing fears of others and their darkness, is actually becoming tuned in to your truth. And once you do that, it is like seeing another world.
Being true to yourself, is the stillness. These truthes bring you closer to feeling your divine truth. You will feel it as energy.
By concentrating on your divine truth, you BECOME it. This is not a joke…you MANIFEST it and make it REAL in your surroundings.
True Power….the power of your Truth, by surrendering to it.
Gatubela, thank you for that…
“Finding that stillness comes when facing truthes and consequences head on, and not running from them, under no circumstances.”
Yes, the first time it happened was when I spent a couple of days in tears after my revelation…
I seem to need an emotional upheaval from time to time; total cozy ‘status quo’ is akin to death for me… so the nirvana state would feel like death too… am I missing something? I cannot feel alive if there is no change, no psychological challenge to me as a person… Except in the past I didn’t know how to make that challenge into TRANSFORMATIVE change…
“True Power….the power of your Truth, by surrendering to it.”
That’s right, surrendering to your true BEING. Which also means asking yourself ‘What is my true mission in this world?’ I feel – I am a ‘bridge builder’… between people, I was born to bring people together, syncretism runs in my blood … But what I find curious… people who have transcended to the level beyond the artificial existence – tend to be quiet and not much forthcoming… so that no one has a clue what is really going on inside of those. And I am an ‘out there’ woman, not in terms of socializing – that bores me to tears, and not in terms of needing company – I prefer my own company, no… In terms of speaking up when I am out there… Well, you can imagine what will happen if I don’t exercise that control and especially DISCERNMENT of how and who I choose to speak to… with my newly found truth. Sparks will fly. So, soulful intentions… I am keeping that close.
Gatubela, why was it an eye opener? I felt the same about that post of yours that I found, it shocked me to see that it can be so LITERAL and REAL, similarities of the experience… Remember I’ve had such a rapid transformation… I am feeling my way through it.
Happy New Year to All.
Hi Ines,
I am glad for your transformation. I guess you can thank P.Puppy for that.
Nirvana is a state of being in which you have access to wonderful energies, but the concept of holding your truth through discipline and doing what you must, is not completely drilled in. I have called this “The valley of light.”
So, Nirvana and all of its lessons…(and powers), for me, is actually a state of being that can be refused, perhaps by choosing to manifest a higher purpose, here. Meaning, your love for mankind is greater than all the riches in Nirvana.
So, the reason that your “nirvana” is unstable, is because you did not choose to work on refining your energies, through “doing what must be done. Nirvana is not for the faint hearted either, due to the rampant illusion that “power” gives you.
But you miss out on the most highest and purest of energies out there to create with.
Hi Gatubela,
“I guess you can thank P.Puppy for that.”
No need. He knows I love him. Truly, where I can give my life for the man. But now I have to live for ME. That is much harder.
“Meaning, your love for mankind is greater than all the riches in Nirvana.” – oh yes, Gatubela, this is what I meant by saying that I want to keep my mortal side, really… To me Nirvana feels… selfish, like withdrawing yourself from the world in a way that has no benefit to anyone, but oneself. I will NOT aspire to that state of being.
Would you be able to explain more of this:
“Nirvana is not for the faint hearted either, due to the rampant illusion that “power” gives you.”
Dear Gatubela, you truly pick up on the most delicate nuisances of expression, I take my hat off to you…
Hi Ines,
Because Nirvana is a state in which power is given “to you”…and not you obtaining your own “power” in living and dying through your own truth.
It is a subtle yet very POWERFUL difference….
Happy New Year for everyone!
Nirvana feels different when you heart is open, because once your heart is open, you begin to have access to different energies.
And then you realize that there is something even “more pure” and divine, then the happiness, power and connectedness that can be manifested by your will, found in Nirvana, because you are not truly BEING.
The key is to find the state of being that permits you to BE.
And that state of being can only be found through a very pure form of love.
The electric forces found within these energies are much more richer to “magnetize” yourself with.
OK I may have confused the state of Nirvana with the state of total diconnectedness from the world which it isn’t… If we accept that the world is in complete state of impermanence and flux, then Nirvana is a state of BEING in Absolute Truth, and that does NOT exclude the pure form of love… I am LIGHT YEARS away from this… One step at a time:)
No, I did not mean for you to feel like you are light years away…
It is just not easy to explain…sorry about that.
Nirvana can be refused, for a higher state of being. You just have to try to feel what a higher state of being could be, beyond the words that you have just written.
The fireworks in London… I really want to know who directed those this year…. I have seen nothing like that… it was a WORK OF ART… transient like everything… but my God… whoever it was – talent.
Reading some of the posts…
“When I have attempted to probe a younger woman for the intent to learn if she desires understanding of her higher-self, or renewal of her limiting-self… especially when her personality crumbles and projects insecurity … the conversation concerning these topics can’t speak beyond the addiction to Prada, or the cuteness of Victoria’s Secret shopping or the tastiness of her Non-Fat Mocha-Java, Honeycomb Latte??… ”
For God’s sake, Eagle… where on Earth do you live? What kind of social circle do you have where women are solely concerned with labels and empty, bubble gum conversations… maybe, just maybe, you could play Pygmalion and CREATE your perfect match…
Darn it, darling, you are looking in all the wrong places… And how do you ‘attempt to probe’… with the same volcanic activity and gusto as on here?
You seem to be pretty aware of the current obsessions… I didn’t know who Kim Kardashian was – until you mentioned it – had to google her… Have much interest in this sort of ‘popular’ culture????
Well…
Contrasting realities/entities. They are vicariously created, fed to keep the comforting mental-myths of self nice and safe, and way out of touch with soul understanding in the present energy. “Love” and “relationships” to such people on that existential plane, are a manifested fickle joke of who that person ‘thinks’ they are, as image needs to feed that tiny thinking. Such people have no clue who they are. Especially when love is considered “real” to those persons seeking revenge on a partner or friend who can feel things most could never feel in three lifetimes. It would bury them if they had that capacity.
Justice, comes from a Warrior soul-center of intense, Shiva-like energies of Truth in ones conflicting and clashing psycho-emotional being, a place of intensely felt destruction and resurrections from within, a channel of enlightenment from the heart which knows suffering and pain in the human condition, which again… fickle heads will never know or feel in this lifetime… That infatuation (the Truth of it) with all things literal and surface in the dynamic, is a weightless whim-revenge for the weak intent “to play” games with a partner or friend, which stems from the ego-gratifying FEARS of socially ACCEPTED abuses, broadly accepted normalcy of sheep thinking “that is love”, hahahaha!… in which surface feelings are ultimately and ONLY concerned with the immediate gratification of ones mythical ego-self (to survive) and nothing else –> in that moment = Godlessness. Human. Animal. Meaninglessness.
When an Eagle says he wants all of you forever, he means every drop of it. If women only knew the tragedy of male Eagle dealing with a woman’s idea of life that is nowhere near his existence of it.. There’s bound to be a few (million) problems.
Well, I did say it’s hard… the mortal stumbles… I lied in 1469 and I’ve been feeling like crap since I posted that… I am sorry.
What is justice to you?
Is justice the correction of something in the DIRECTION of Truth?
Justice — is the infinite search for the Truth. It’s much deeper than Trivial Pursuit the board game. Justice, the feeling of it, is conflicting and volatile in man/woman. Justice is much deeper and broader from the intelligence of ONES OPEN HEART. Not the grasping personality. It is the mind-energy and INSTINCTUAL desire and consciousness and openness for ones Truth during real in the breath engagement.
Versus…
Revenge — is the separation of the Truth. Revenge is concealment of Truthful energy. Revenge desires the belief of the lie. To make it real. For it to come ‘True’. See the paradox??. Then that fearful lie desires to be followed. While attempting TO CONTROL the volatility feeling of Truthful energy exchanged in the moment. That agile mental game does not desire, nor is capable of death (change of will/ego). That mental unconsciousness ‘wants’ to change the fate and foible of others emotions, yet is oh-so cowardly in the quest for changing themselves. For that lie in ones head, BELIEVES they are the sensible and strong ones. Again, that desire to control of… “Hey, I’ll change you (your feelings for me)… while in-turn you won’t change me”. Do you see that cowardice? That bullshit is the norm out there. And people are blind when they are doing it. Asleep. Baaaah.
In much simpler terms:
* Justice has a Higher Purpose to fulfill which is not caused by the daily neurosis of the known.
* Revenge has an Egocentric desire (motivation) which is completely saturated in the inconsequential (fearful) issues of the known.
One is Inner — Justice.
The other is Outer — Revenge.
In mortal terms revenge is desire to punish when one’s lower self expectations of another are not met on the same level = the act of levelling the score. There’s no search for the real truth, only a wish to satisfy one’s egotistical need to feel ‘equal’ on the animal existential plane. The Outer…
Look, I feel like a tight rope walker… any step left or right results in deep fall and death… and you caught me again… There will come a time when the walk becomes natural, with no need to CONSCIOUSLY watch my steps… my inner self made me aware of the lie and miserable, I must be on the right track… It is not easy on my side, but I wouldn’t have it any other way…
I felt INSTINCTUALLY the injustice of my post = reaction seeking… immediate gratification… the surface…. where is true love in that… so I lied to you I know that, darling. I was led by the ‘want’.
It is forgiven… thank you.
I’m a Sagittarius woman with a Scorpio man and as just like the other people on here, I have also experienced the hot/cold phase, the disappearing act, being a victim of the scorp’s crazy temper lash outs and tests. It hurt, but I enjoyed getting revenge by delivering the same intensity back to the Scorpio man.
I never expected our casual dating to evolve into something more and I certainly wasn’t expecting him to change. I simply accepted him for who he was and loved him for who he was , I didn’t expect anything in return.
But oddly enough, out of the blue, he changed.
One day after a night of clubbing, he tells me that he doesn’t want to club anymore, that he’s in love with me and that he ‘s going to be a better man.
He has most certainly kept his word, after being together for over a year, he has made many significant changes to his character in comparison to who he was when we first met. No more temper tantrums, no more disappearing, no more selfishness, insecurities are gone.etc. It’s like he became a whole different person.
But that old Scorpio guy re-appears every now and then, not with me, but with people who he really dislikes. Or when he feels he has to protect me, he gets the stinger out.
It’s hard for me to grasp that someone will make such a change to themselves and make sacrifices because someone loves them.. he has turned down high paying international jobs to stay with me and has decided to put my education first, before his career.. He said my love changed him, but the intentions of my love weren’t to change him,I just wanted to support him for who he wants to be.
Hi Kari,
Revenge is only revenge to those who “play” the illusion and are not truly in love.
I cannot believe how miserable my inner core can make me feel when there is some untruth in what I had said or done… this is utterly new, like having a compass inside which points me out in the direction of injustice… by making me feel this way… another revelation… on an intuitive level which doesn’t need verbalising. Damn.
There was no soulful intention in what I said, and my soul bloody well let me know… Eagle, your blood boils… mine curds into clots… again you are teaching me a lesson… Please forgive me, for I should have known better… what happened with all that newly acquired awareness of mine…. regressed…
My God, how hard IS that to live with those levels of perception…. I am finding out for myself….
well then i guess in the beginning we both played the illusion
Hi Kari,
Listen to this. Listen to it only with headphones. It is nothing perverted, so don´t worry, but it shows how powerful illusion can be.
I mean, you know the truth, but somehow, your brain says…it is REAL.
Imagine when you are dealing your own DESIRES, lower nature, and scorpionic magnetism (scorpio magnetizing you and reining in his desires). Obviously, this is not your case, but since this is a scorpio forum, I thought I would mention it.
Anyways, it is ALL illusion, until you arrive – die to the TRUTH. The truth will resonate within you so strongly, that you will not want to “play games” any more.
By the way, the truth is the only thing to meet scorpionic darkness with. Also, the person who magnetizes is usually the person who is in control. The rest of us are “salves” to this energy.
Unless you prefer the truth….
Ooooopppppssssiiiii!
“The rest of us are “salves” to this energy.”
I meant to say…
“The rest of us are SLAVES to this energy…”
Sorry about the typo.
You know, the reason that people don´t seek the truth is that we believe it is in “the light”…and those powers that be, like it that way! It keeps them dominating us nicely.
Truth is a soulful energy, which means, it feels like it is “out there” in the cosmos.
Where do we look up, when we seek God or the Divine? Don´t be nervous, it ain´t that dark.
http://www.google.cl/imgres?q=cosmos&um=1&hl=es&sa=N&biw=1024&bih=475&tbm=isch&tbnid=gwX38iZ9016A1M:&imgrefurl=http://macgo1bach.wordpress.com/2010/11/20/el-cosmos/&docid=ZK61W4SaJeNxjM&imgurl=http://macgo1bach.files.wordpress.com/2010/11/el-cosmos.jpg&w=600&h=425&ei=ZnwDT7jcK8iSiQLjtYiLDQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=681&vpy=224&dur=2451&hovh=136&hovw=192&tx=82&ty=62&sig=115058583124515078005&page=9&tbnh=116&tbnw=155&start=89&ndsp=12&ved=1t:429,r:10,s:89
Wow cetera algorithm… there are two factors establsihing sound direction for the brain… sound intensity (volume), and sound wavelength, which determines high and low pitch… I don’t quite understand how they manage to reproduce those, but I think it has something to do with playing those two against one another… The brain makes a comparison between the characteristics of those two factors from left and right ear and makes a judgement on direction…
Mother nature knows that… pheasant chicks produce sounds of the wavelength difficult to be detected by foxes, because of the size of the fox head = obstruction.
This is brilliant, thanks, Gatubela
Yeah…when I heard it I was amazed….
I did not analyze it so much though. My point is that when you are listening it you are “aware” that it is not real, but your brain is not really working.
So, you have to work on your FEELINGS…not what your mind is thinking or perceiving!
You may have even been “entertained and amused” by it as well. But there is nothing real about it.
So, if you know the truth, how would you be able to get out of the illusion?
It reminds me of society…we know the truth, but we are still under its illusion.
Foxes with big heads…lol. I guess it is because they have too much electric mind activity for certain frequencies to be registered?
A couple of quick facts about this Puppy:
– Doesn’t own a T.V, by choice… I threw it off the balcony two years ago (ok I gave it away). You can begin to imagine an inner world not “caught” by media, gossip, news, politics and popular entertainment.
– Doesn’t own an IPod, by choice… I reversed over it on the driveway four years ago (ok I gave it away to a little kid). You can begin to image how much brain noise, mental clutter and “worry” that has eliminated in pragmatic life thanks to hearing nothing but silence.
So if I’m not watching the nut box, and not listening to the latest misogynistic songs… then I must be literally in my cave. Or my basement.;)
Years back in the Red Square I met a man with the most amazing eyes – that of Jesus… deep soulful blue eyes which made one feel in touch with the forces beyond this material world… he never watched TV, read newspapers or otherwise immersed himself in the ‘information’ orientated world.
I never forgot those eyes.
This is exactly the question I meant to ask you for a long time… and did somewhere down the line – you didn’t answer… Eagle, how do you MANIFEST your truth in life, when you HAVE to be part of this everyday struggle to survive?
What DRIVES you in your choice of occupation? Is it money… the challenge… being creative… wanting to help others… wanting to push yourself to the limits? As I said – we all need to eat… How do you RECONCILE your truth and your mortal needs?
It was easier for Buddha to an extent… they didn’t have the monthly paycheck then…
well… the truth be… I haven’t watched TV since August last year… when I went into a meltdown… every time I tried I couldn’t concentrate as it felt meaningless and insignificant… same for radio…
sorry… I continue the conversation… every day… it never really stopped for me. I carry this energy around with me now…
I am beginning to feel what’s on offer to that brave girl – an entire Universe. Makes one shiver.
Well I love you too. Very good comprehension btw of what I’m sending your way. A big gold star for you. Your heart is seemingly more colorful, stronger and aware over the past few weeks. It’s not hiding inside the fragile eggshell hell once known to you.;)
“I met a man with the most amazing eyes – that of Jesus..”
Wow, you met Jesus?!… LOL. yes, you mean the soul of Jesus even if he looked like Alice Cooper.
“how do you MANIFEST your truth in life, when you HAVE to be part of this everyday struggle to survive? ”
Well the material willpower to survive comfortably is there/here within me. I’m a very resourceful person in the game of our material hustle. You know how?… I understand people. I understand the “systems” people create in the relative workforce. My soul freedom has indeed been oppressed by static, power concerned employers, bosses in the past. But over time through my spiritual evolution with forces much greater than me, I have discovered that I am my own ultimate authority. No one can take that power from me, because it is power they cannot take. Ya follow? I have goals and ambitions… but those things aren’t really that important in the scheme of my life’s meaning. It is the transcendence within each moment of loving people, loving the presence of the Source the Source has let me experience. I am a product of fateful experiences which is not defined by my bank account and professional image. Those things are only relevant on the surface interactions with people. The people who I let in close, like all of you here on the forum, is what gives my heart and soul meaning. The economics of my tangible desires will work themselves out.
I guess I’ll just have to be the Buddha in the work environment. No person in the superficial world is “too much” for me. If anything… the volatility the Source has bestowed me, the intensity I EXPERIENCE, can be too much for others (as exemplified right here on a computer screen, imagine my torpedo’s in real life)… but that energy has since calmed and directed itself with higher social sophistication and detachment. I was not always detached in my hell.
When you think about it Ines… how much money do we really need?
The male Scorpio role in the movie ‘the Notebook’ showed us beautifully that SIMPLICITY and soulful, fearless loving in this flash of physical life does not need to acquire more and more and more and more money. The God of us has already given us what we need. Unfortunately, the hell on this earth is the illusion and sensual pleasures seduced among mortals in the material race. That race is something which does not make me feel free. I feel free evolving and changing through first hand experience. Raw, heart altering lessons. Not change perceived in the image of what everyone thinks of me or expects of me. If I rest my life in the hands of others perceptions and values and fears of me and their illusions to manipulate only what they understand with their 5 senses… then I would be such the fool to deserve that existence.
It turns out my soul is not defined by how much stuff I accumulate through life. Or the titles and position I acquire during that ascent into egoville. And I’m grateful for that inward understanding which a Higher Power has taught me.
“Justice has a Higher Purpose to fulfill which is not caused by the daily neurosis of the known.”
As a higher purpose, the necesity of the existance of justice is just not a thing to waste mind energy on.
Soulful people have no need of it nor any desire to demand it.
Is that because they already LIVE it? And BE it?
It is because you LOVE.
Well, darling, you are preaching to the converted… don’t forget that I am Pisces = otherworldly. In my case it applies nearly 100% there is a big difference between us – I haven’t got a clue how the ‘systems’ of this world operate, and how the fabric of this material world is stiched together – from a point of view of how people EXTRACT FROM ONE ANOTHER, those co-dependant relationships where there is a constant barter deal of goodies being exchanged for money, love, positions, influence and sometimes for just as little as a bottle of booze…. hence, my survival techinques are crap… although I do keep my head above water… just about. As long as rain doesn’t fall on my head, and I am reasonably warm in winter… oh heck, it is winter, and it is cold here…
To have that FREEDOM of autonomy for me would be a blessing… so that I could carry on with more important business of BEING. And maybe helping others on the way there too. Life in the animal kingdom is so much simpler – you only hunt for what you immediately need. It is honest.
You do make me smile… a gold star… you must have a fair stock of those in your ‘basement’.
I am glad I got to know you… well, parts of you.
You shouldn’t have said this:
“Well I love you too.”
Because it means you are feeding this in me:
“surface feelings are ultimately and ONLY concerned with the immediate gratification of ones mythical ego-self (to survive) and nothing else –> in that moment “
It unsettles me… because I feel that I haven’t reached the level of perception necessary and warranting those words… I am nowhere near that stage, even though all I have felt so far – I have truly FELT.
I have to EARN it, through the truthful evolution of my soul, not for it to be freely given away. Please understand this.
Thank you.
“By the way, the truth is the only thing to meet scorpionic darkness with. Also, the person who magnetizes is usually the person who is in control.”
Hmmm… some Scorpio guys do NOT welcome the truth… No.2 comes to mind. They run too… From themselves.
The truth can also redress the power (control) balance, i.e. remove it all together.
Hi Ines,
Well…let us try to put Nirvanic Truth (dark, still, soulful and power embedded – the soul cleared of all illusion and negativity) against the option of TRULY BEING, which is actually the evolution of the truth energy and the FEELING of cosmic LAW in your soul. Meaning, you can begin to excercise certain truthes as a way to bring healing and love. Because the evolution of TRUTH is BEING it through LOVE.
If you feel Nirvana….you will unconsciously KNOW that there is something beyond…because one is unable to hold their “truth” as a state of being. I mean, unless you are a Saint or a person who can dedicate themselves to monkhood.
For the rest of us, who have to live the daily “slaughter me a salary” routine, dealing with other people´s energy is not for the faint hearted. I mean, can you deal in the present moment, with all of the LATENT ANGER, sexually repressed and opppressed (by society), abused people out there, who KNOW the truth, but can´t really do anything about it?
I actually have to consider living with nothing, not depending on anyone, and becoming a hermit. Because if I do start dealing with people´s demons (and I sense them in my CORE being), well, I better walk around with well protected and have kevlar lead composite undies, instead of the frilly pink ones I am used to wearing! (at least scorpio would not beable to penetrate those!)
The battle ground is unstable at the moment…as people knowing their truth is not enough.
Truth as an energy, evolves into something else as you refine your lower lower desires and sexual nature, and LASER beam and discern just what FEELINGS you will permit yourself to FEEL.
The key to this state of being for me, is found in the heart, as the way to balance magnetism and electricity.
Control is actually not a word that exists in a soulful person´s vocabulary. They will remain silent, while those peacocks are prancing and parading. I mean, not when you understand transforming and transcending…
We need to feel these energies more at a FEARLESS level and not be afraid to get our hands dirty a bit too. I have gotten myself into trouble at times, and my ass sure is being stung alot, but running away from the truth does not exist for me. My heart rebells…my mind says…”there is more!” and I start hibernating in my multiple shells and worlds available to me. (moon in cancer, venus in cancer, sun, mercury and mars in the eighth, neptune in sag, in the 12th, and then of course, there is lilith in scorpio)
Not when I have the option of being able to live it.
Eagle,
You are leaving… People change. My mum used to be a non believer in anything (the nature of our cultural background)… Then a few years back she changed… out of her own volition… she did say to me ‘You will understand one day’. I didn’t listen. We spoke a few days ago (we too are separated by countries). I am lucky to have her. So… they may not be what they once were…
Be safe in your travels, darling. As long as you are somewhere out there in the world – everything will be all right…
Gatubela,
“Truth as an energy, evolves into something else as you refine your lower lower desires and sexual nature, and LASER beam and discern just what FEELINGS you will permit yourself to FEEL.”
Again, you pick up on my unspoken state… I understand that you have a lot of water in your chart… I have 4 (four!!!) planets in Pisces… imagine what a STRUGGLE it is to permit myself a choice to feel or not to feel anything… Restraint…. is difficult. It may be a gift which allowed me to start the transformation so fast, but… I posted an ‘innocuous’ comment on a Scorpio man forum… and ended up with THIS. On a computer screen, sweet… He’s done a good job, now I have to live with it… Two months is NOTHING in terms of refining your energies. Yes, the battleground is unstable… but I will go all the way, my heart is telling me there is no choice in the matter.
I am writing this and have this incredible feeling of ‘deja vu’, down to some phrases used… how strange…
Gatubela, I will e-mail you some time, this public place is not safe heaven anymore.
“I posted an ‘innocuous’ comment on a Scorpio man forum… and ended up with THIS. On a computer screen, sweet… He’s done a good job, now I have to live with it..”
Well at least now you’re alive and semi-awake. You had wanted to know, I responded. It’s not easy for me to resuscitate zombie drudgery in the known of futile relating. No good deed goes unpunished. Welcome to my universe. Now you see why my warrior existence does not desire “to change” people through the fickle, deceitful, meaningless, superficial world. Unless they think that egg is for me. That’s when Hades appears. Fears pervading them are far more powerful and crystallized than what I could reveal and heal in them. People don’t want pain of the Truth remember? They want the soothing comfort of the conjured myth. Who am I to change that?
Your comment above is disconnected from your heart, regretful and cynical (very Virgo btw) and that cynicism, self-pity… spits acid-rain perceptions which are real to you through your personality limitation. Forgive me for destroying and expanding your stuffy limitations. Why are you blaming or implying this engagement has been detrimental? Why the self-pity? That “safe thinking” will only validate your very real fears and doubts in this life. Faith in a force far greater than your ‘believed’ whims has eluded you once more. That lack of faith is seen in your known, right here.
So…
YOU be safe. The unknowns are there for you to ignore as they have been ignored in your past. Everything will be alright.;)
How can you say I blame you.. when what you have done is short of a miracle… when only six months ago I SWORE my atheism will never change… when I NEVER before touched or felt the UNLIMITLESS… when I KNOW what it takes for you to shake me out of my slumber… when you have given me part of your soul, and in doing so you have given me ME???? Yes, I AM scared… my faith in self gets knocked when lines on computer screen are all there is, I am scared that I got to know only a fraction of me and only a fraction of you, and that I will never get to know ALL… I am scared that if you go – part of me will die forever… I am scared that I should be able to go on on my own, and that I will not be able to do so… I am scared that I will not be strong enough to seek the UNKNOWN and will go back to the meaningless existence… I am flesh and blood, my Virgin wants tangible, while my Piscean wants eternal, forever… these fight within me, yes, a Virgo day… yes, I am guilty of self betrayal, but Eagle… two months… you had FOUR YEARS… look back at how it was for you when you started your quest… I asked you how you dealt with your feelings, not those of others, you never answered. They are STRANGLING me, I can’t think of anything else, I am trying to FEEL and understand what’s truly REAL, and I don’t have any tears left in me… It doesn’t make me weak, it makes me learn of who I am, and I stumble… and I feel selfish and mortal.
I am turned inside out, I am not punishing you… I love you, but I want to love you from my soul core, without attachment to my base, my post 1478… and it HURTS like hell… because it means KNOWING me first, I am not used to that. It means destroying everything that I have known so far… It means surrendering to the truth of my being, to that universal FORCE which is also your truth… and I am still searching my soul, can’t you see??/ I DON’T WANT safe and easy. I never wanted that, if I did – I would have walked away, like many before me… If I have to DIE many times before I am fully awake – so be it. And DON’T give me the known, futile relating, you did once, and I DON’T WANT that. I want THE TRUE, do you understand?
Please say nothing, I need to be alone for a while…
“..my Virgin wants tangible, while my Piscean wants eternal, forever… these fight within me..”
They are ONE sweetheart. Infinite in the present. Not separated.
I am always here for you. Confront all fears within yourself. They are gifts.
I am here.:)
Love
Pluto
Eagle, the desert like conditions of your love… the next stage of evolution after an operating theatre scenario… where a tree is expected to rely on its own supplies of water…. be resourceful and grow regardless of the suffocating hot air and lack of rain. While all the time the clouds are brewing… The tree knows there will be an abundance of rain and nurturing moist air. Just be patient. Wait. The flood will come, can you hear the thunder… it’s a journey into the UNKNOWN…
Give me time, darling… you can’t truly love this Persephone until she gracefully accepted the gifts and entered her feminine altruistic divine… She knows the price of true love now…
Thank you for being here…
Take all the time you need Ines…
I’m going to be in the desert starting in a few months, literally there like a Scorpion nestled under a rock. I will be exploding-up the earth, mining amid enormous earth-pits… Oh how Plutonian and Martian! Making amazing friendships too. That’s a new chapter of my tangible life that can’t wait to embrace. The new vocation will be high-risk stuff and I’ll love every moment of it. The autonomy, the freewill and relationship with natures divinity under the infinite sky will present huge personal responsibility. Those extreme experiences are something I’m very excited about. To escalate the feelings of being alive. I will be journeying to different mining towns (Western Australia) so keeping in touch with all you guys via laptop and a cold beer is a must. The isolation will feel like home to me in Soul with the Source.
Gatubela and Mari, thank you for all that you are. You’re true feminine spiritual warriors who can see the unseen with me. I love every atom of you both and what you each stand-for as a soulful, strong, eternal humans becoming. May the best of love and passion and compassion continue to overflow from your hearts, and never let anyone take those gifted virtues from you. I know you won’t.
I’ll be sharing sporadically here due to my physical changes… but lest not forget I am here with all of you in heart, mind, spirit and soul.
The flesh of who we are is unimportant.
Love
Puppy
Hi Ppuppy!
Sounds like you are in for a great adventure!! I feel excited for you 🙂
You have shared so much here… your presence will always be felt and you will always be loved! hugs~
Take care Mr Eagle… fly high….
love,
Mari
My heart is pounding… I KNEW it, I fucking knew it… why do you think I said ‘be safe in your travels’… I don’t care you think the flesh is unimportant, I want you to be ALIVE!!!!!! Spiritual altruistic love alone cannot sustain a human relationship, unless you choose to love humankind, but not a human…. what is a REAL human bond without a REAL human connection? This is where the feelings of vulnerability and acceptance of each other’s humanity come from, while acknowledging the divinity in one another… we love and accept not only the strengths, but the weaknesses as well, we love ALL. We need BOTH, to create a meaningful and lasting union between a man and a woman… A BALANCE of mortality and divinity within us and within our relationships. If one is missing – everything else is a LIE….
Jesus, Eagle…. maybe it is for the best… taking all the time I need to not depend on you for my journey, I know it is the whole point of LOVING you… but it sure FEELS shite… Yes, I am being selfish again… But you have to do what makes you FEEL alive, darling. Please please be here when you can.
Cold beer… you said you don’t drink.
I want to cry…
“It would be much more appreciated if someone would just tell me directly to take a break on here for a year or so and go mining for iron-ore out in the Australian outback somewhere…”
I remembered that one… because it felt a strange comment at the time… oh Eagle…
I’ve always had this obscure ABBA song on my mobile MP3 player. EAGLE. It speaks to me.
Love
Firstly, you said you needed time? That was quick. LoL. Second, a couple of beers a fortnight in 50 degree heat is not “drinking”. Third, what we have shared here IS REAL. Stop minimizing that Truth. If you’re so bent on having me in the flesh, alive, hahaha…. then grab your hard hat and work boots, and get your altruistic butt over to the big island… See?… you get real.
The balance is here, on a computer screen. That’s all we have to work with. If you think otherwise, then you are dreaming.
Ahaaahaaaa!!!!! That’s why I love you… Real indeed… as long as you are live and kicking – everything will be fine!!!!! Forgive me for feeling it’s the end of the world – it isn’t. Hmmmm… big island…. I am one crazy fish, ya never know….
You made me feel… fantastic, you crazy Indiana Jones!! And you don’t even try, huh…
Cheers
See that blond standing by the arrivals gate with a sign ‘Pluto Puppy’ when you land back in Oz? It’s me LOL…
I do need time… so I am gonna switch this computer off, and you will be there with me… in soul and spirit… just as you wish.
It’s all REAL;)
When I said ‘I want you to be ALIVE’, I meant ‘not dead’… he said it was a high risk job… never mind…
Eagle,
This forum is dead without you… I realise how much admiration I have for you. You LIVE your life, not dream it… a lesson to all of us. There are no ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’ for you, only ‘DO IT’. Do it if your heart tells you it is the right and only thing to do. You truly are unique, forever.
I feel that whatever turmoil I experience, is NOTHING compared to the love I feel for you… Your strength comes from the deepest core of your being, nobody can ever take this away from you… You are what a man should be, but never is… You are a beautiful beautiful man… I want to protect you from anything harmful and toxic and vicious, I know you are perfectly capable of protecting yourself, but that’s how it is…
Whatever fears I have I can deal with those… Except one… if you die you will kill part of me…so… don’t.
I love you. And I am not afraid of that.
Now silence.
If one has to have a crisis, it may as well be a fully blown one.. the Eagle is gone, and I am battling with extreme feelings of loss and despair, but I can deal with those, I am already developing the tools necessary to become emotionally independent… but what he touched upon was only a tip of the iceberg… I want to LIVE my life, not to be like a foraging animal looking for scraps of half decomposed flesh to sustain me… I feel like disposing of all I have and looking for some place new… England is sooo-oo safe, everything predictable, everything is how they EXPECT you to be… the red tape on your life that I loath – is TANGIBLE here… I have always battled against it in my own way, but who am I to change it… one in millions… Soulless predictable society. And people everywhere… everywhere… I always said that the biggest luxury in my life would be to have my own desert island… and an internet connection on it… yep. I am crazy.
I have to take responsibility for my part in creating the life that I have… Dead life….
I keep reading random comments of the forum, and it hurts and hurts and hurts… yet I can’t get away from it… it’s like a conversation that carries on even when it stopped… THIS is what HELL feels like… ok I will be alright, I know that… just have to feel the pain.. and tears… just come and go from nowhere… welcome onboard the Death Train… But I promised to keep on learning and keeping faith… this is how..
People think of feelings as imaginary… non tangible objects, because one cannot touch them. But feelings are a PHYSICAL presence in our bodies… they have a physical base inside each of us. They have their own energy generated by the mind, yes, the mind, when we first formed that connection to whatever event or person… This is the paradox: feelings are connected to our thought patterns, but they become their own entities, they get a life of their own… So the MIND is the culprit, but also the CURE from the ‘illness’. …
I lay in bed and was feeling so twisted and miserable that I decided to really CONCENTRATE on that twist… the knot in my stomach, the heartache, the chills, the emptiness… Literally go INSIDE my body with my mind… Once this concentration was strong and felt TANGIBLE, I thought that I could PHYSICALLY move it with my MIND, so I gave it a go… Yes, sounds strange I know… The direction of that movement was… yes, upwards… from the lower part around the groin upwards to the heart area. I know it sounds a bit clinical, but if people try…. it may help… So I did it again and again, like a strong vacuum cleaner suction stuck to the carpet… imagining how it moves inside of me… into my heart, physically. It was HARD, the first time I could only do it for a couple of minutes, and I literally forgot to breathe at some point… For me it worked when I was laid on my right.. What happens then is… relief. You may even feel happy temporarily.. It is not permanent, the feelings will come back and you would have to do this again and again…. there is no short and easy path. But each time it is achieved – the next blast takes shorter to EXPEL….
I am writing this because we were told here ‘Really FEEL it’, but people just don’t know HOW TO and how to deal with that… it’s not THINKING about it, it is PHYSICALLY feeling it and pulling it up… This is what is beginning to work for me, people may find their own way…
Hi Ines….
No, it does not sound clinical or strange to me at all…we all find our ways, and I am happy that you are sharing yours.
OK…yes, you begin to feel your intuition and surrender to your higher self.
The idea is that you grow towards your higher self, and more awareness.
Dying is not easy…I feel a bit strange sharing it here but perhaps you will find it useful…
Actually, the reality of HELL….I guess I see it as the perfect state for creation. Meaning, it is the state of being that becomes open to us, when we begin to reject our own fears and comforts, here.
It is the zero ego point of transformation and transcendance….and if we do it right, we can move those mountains…by raising those energies…
Therefore, it becomes important how we decide to die. Why? Because we must choose what we bring into it, and that determines, how we go out.
If you choose pain and agony…then you must strive to overcome it first…hell becomes a place to create and find your highest self…because you entered in love. Meaning, you will begin to SEE God and the DIVINE. Do not give in to anything, but love.
Therefore, you will leave with what you came in with…and your physical world will begin to change and transform.
As you become better at this, you begin to learn how to carry other people´s pain, and transform their reality as well, especially if you are “merged” with them.
“If you choose pain and agony…then you must strive to overcome it first…”
Do we CHOOSE pain and agony? I don’t feel I had a choice… it just IS… it comes and goes randomly… I never know when the next wave will hit… it is powerful… stops me from breathing sometimes… at the time it happens – there is no connection to thoughts, it’s a physical animal state… like a bout of vomiting… I guess thoughts are PRIOR to that… I have to find a way of disconnecting the thoughts and the following attack of feelings…
The withdrawal symptoms…
“and your physical world will begin to change and transform.”
How? How can it physically transform?
Thank you, Gatubela, it is all how I feel now…
“If you choose pain and agony…then you must strive to overcome it first…hell becomes a place to create and find your highest self…because you entered in love.”
Yes, I have entered in love… this is what it is taking me to find that person within who can move the mountains… I never knew I had it within me… I feel so much pain… it is different to whatever I felt in my life before… sure I cried in the past, but nothing like this… because it comes NOT from that dark twisted fearful place in my heart, not from anger or hate… although it is misery nonetheless. It comes from something pure I cannot put it into words… it is a pure kind of pain…
I will share the journey here as it might help others… I feel that my mission is to make it more tangible and accessible, to find and show TOOLS for others of how to deal with those gut wrenching states brought on by separation and fears and rejection and the billion of other feelings people may feel…
I also owe this to myself and to the man. I died once, through the pain of having hurt him… and I will transform through the pain of having lost him… He was TRUE to me, and I want to give back IN TRUTH.
Gatubela, I appreciate you being here so much… because doing it on your own is not easy… there are no pointers, and there are no people around who can understand this… even just knowing I am on the right path and not loosing my mind slowly is a help.
This is the song my son gave me… kinda reflects on how… Alexi Murdoch ‘Breathe’
Last night there was no PRESENCE outside of me… instead I felt enveloped in a cocoon… floating inside of it… blank mind… I fell asleep. And I get up and tears keep coming back…
I didn’t know HOW to cry before… nobody teaches us how… we cry from the feelings of self pity, from the feelings of blame, both of ourselves and others… we cry because we feel DARKNESS inside… no emotional release… catharsis… will be forthcoming from THAT…
I know different now… I cry because I love, and it is taking me to love BIGGER than a love for one man… these are NOT bitter tears… they keep coming and going… each wave brings me closer to the edge of something… I feel ahead a VAST space.. infinite and eternal… it is near TANGIBLE… I feel the urge to close off my mind, this is how scary it is… but I can’t because if I did – I will never KNOW… How long does it go on? are these my acute sensitivites which make me quantum leap to this unknown territory? why is it so fast and violent? am I losing my mind??/
If I emerge on the other side of this – it will mean FOREVER…. again Eagle… what have you done…
Here is a strange but TRUE fact… when I got back from Ireland before the New Year, my kitchen wall clock was working, but the time changed to six hours back (or forward?)… somehow I cannot bring myself to correct it… so it keeps ticking in another time zone… I don’t even know which one…
Hello,
I’ve been an avid reader of the posts on this forum and I very much want to share my story with a Scorpio man (which is still ongoing). Pluto Puppy, I would love to hear your insights, but from what I understand you will be away? Is there any way to contact you off the forum?
In any case, I would still like to submit my story here as it seems that everyone has something helpful to contribute. However, I was wondering if there is a word limit of sorts since my story is quite long (and I am quite detail-oriented, so brevity is not easy for me- 🙂 ).
Thank you,
Little Fish obsessed with Scorpio
Hi Scorpioobsessed,
OK…!!!
I hope you will share!
No…I have not experienced any word limit in my posts….and I certainly look forward to hearing your story.
Dear Gatubela,
Thank you for your encouraging response! I will write the story and post it over the next couple of days–hopefully by tomorrow.
I’ll be very interested in hearing your insights.
Best,
Little Fish who is Scorpioobsessed
When the powerful energy is gone out of your life, and the abyss of separation is hammering at all your senses, there are two things you notice… first, a massive VOID which, on closer inspection – has ALWAYS been there… Second, what do you need TO DO about that… the answer – fill the void with YOU… your truthful being… And before you do…you know.. that worn out phrase ‘Be true to who you are’?? To answer that I first need TO KNOW who I am… My loving feminine energy, through loving the man, is looking to turn onto MYSELF, to start this investigation… That’s why the void has existed in the first place – we never grant ourselves access to our own energetic circle of compassion, humility, love, understanding of SELF. I feel all these issues very strongly now, it is giving me insight and… tools I guess. It will be a lifetime …
Gatubela, if I asked you that question… ‘Who are you? what would you answer? Would you be able to answer that just in a couple of sentences?
Scorpio O welcome… another Fishy smitten with the Scorpion… seems to be a trend…
Hi Ines,
Who am I? No one really.
My perception of who I am, is actually more a sense of belonging and unity. I would prefer that the egocentric concept of “I” not exist.
Perhaps “I” is a “We”…for me…
Hmmm… I feel it is dangerous and unnatural to completely submit ‘I’ to the universal force… unless one choses to leave this world for life of a monk… we still have to pay the bills… to me it is all about balance and unity of the two…
I feel drained emotionally and that has sapped all my energy… physical, mental… Maybe I just shut up and keep silence… I just hope he is well.
I find it interesting that you mix the concept of universal love, danger and unnatural together.
Yes…perhaps there is a bit of truth there….but the words “danger” and “unnatural” would apply to “YOU”…and “YOUR NEIGHBOUR”…the everyday people you see but don´t pay attention to… who live in fear and are unable to TRULY seek to give. It seems that you have a budding superiority complex with regards to your definition of “BALANCE”.
“YOU” are the people who at first seem like role model citizens, until the word “NO” is said to them.
By separating the monks from the rest of the YOUs out there…you leave very little room for people who struggle to be better! Again, this is the difference between you and “us”.
“Us” feels that it is available for everyone…
These energies are accessible to all of us…and anyone who wants to see them, does not have to be a celibate monk or nun in order to see them.
You just have to dedicate yourself to it…
I meant ‘I’ in the context of the question ‘Who am I’… whre all three words carry a load… If talking about ‘I’ specifically… Well, I can only speak for myself… you see I feel ‘I’ as a masculine energy devoted to survival… as I mentioned before somewhere I personally severly ‘lack’ in this type of energy… For me it would be dangerous to deny my ‘I’ existence.. without it, my perpetual urge to ‘dissolve’ into something bigger than myself would mean destroying my mortal self, physically. This is what balance means to me, on my personal plane of existence… The feeling of universal love is not affected by my ‘I’ if that makes sense…
There is no separation between ‘you’ and ‘us’. ‘Us’ is available to all if they choose to seek.
You belong to celestial world, dear Gatubela… not known to many.
and I said I have to earn love… no, I don’t. Love is not earned, it just… is, when people connect on the same spiritual level. I failed to understand that.
It is interesting how TANGIBLY different Scorpio men’s energies FEEL depending on some of their natal placements. From my experience…
The Eagle – Venus in Scorpio, Mars in Libra… His sexual energy field was what I noticed FIRST. It emanated from him like radiation from a quasar… very subtle and very potent.. He is tuned into a woman on a very instinctual level – he ‘gets’ the feminine… Utterly devoted. Compassionate, without being demonstrative, I doubt anyone who works with him sees that… In other ways, he is balanced, down to earth, a strong sense of fairness, with a grasp for detail… an air of reassurance and someone who KNOWS at all times what he is doing… The man you can trust your life with.
He brought out the courageous side in me.
Compare that to…
No.2 – Venus in Libra, Mars in Scorpio… …. His energy field was so STRONG I could nearly TOUCH it. But the first thing I felt was DANGEROUS… dangerous, tortured, heavy, penetrating… I LOVED it… We probed each other, he was open with me and brutally honest… It didn’t make me uncomfortable, it made me feel ALIVE. He once gazed into my eyes, then looked away and said ‘Those compassionate eyes…’ We both were too wound up by two weeks of talking online… and both were intrigued by each other to the point where our meeting was decided spontaneously and took place just two hours later. Me staying away from men for years didn’t help. And his (what he believed) soul mate walked out on him three months prior, without explanations… Picture that… two screwed up people ended up in a one night stand, both then wanting more and both DESTROYING it in our own ways… I now see how my own emotional immaturity, too, contributed to that. He made me aware of my strong sexuality.
Compare that to…
No.1 – Venus in Libra, Mars in Virgo… His energy field felt rather neutral. He was concerned with all things spiritual (practicing Christian). He didn’t attempt to get me to bed, I appreciated that. Very gracious in conduct, with a sense of beauty and higher purpose. Cultured, with a strong sense of duty… He said he could FEEL a person within the first minute, and he didn’t sense any ‘bad’ vibe from me, huh… I didn’t get to know him well, a few phone calls and one meeting. He was also tortured, through the breakup of a ten year old relationship…
He gave me my impulse to search for something MORE.
Imagine combining those three into one – they would make one hell of a guy… Yeah.
That was then… this is now…
“Imagine combining those three into one – they would make one hell of a guy… Yeah.”
You are an opportunist…
No, Gatubela…. Each of those men gave me a glimpse of some part of me which I didn’t consciously realised existed within me.. I have come in here with nothing, i.e. contorted ideas of what life is about, and I was given the world beyond the ‘world’, through talking to you, P.P. and others. I am eternally grateful, a lot of people out there do NOT have this kind of tuition even when they go searching for it and are DESPERATE to find the answers… and I know a few in my immediate vicinity who ARE desperately searching…
Perfection is an illusive falsehood manifest in the material where people constantly check their mental creations of what it ‘should’ be like against what it ‘isn’t’ = ego projections. I want to walk away from that.
Very well…although your “triple scorpio combo” comment is singing another tune.
“That was then… this is now…”
We will ALL be consumed by the thoughts of someone who exited our life at some point… I choose not to fight this energy that I perceive as part of me now… I EMBRACE the thoughts instead of trying to get rid of them… trying to EXPEL those thoughts will only make you miserable, FIGHTING those will bring more grief… it is the denial of your STATE OF BEING, pretending it is not there… and we sure know that we fail miserably at this pretence. Let those thoughts be there, but TRANSFORM them..
I use my MIND… I IMAGINE this person following me when I go about my day…there with me in a clean pure state… I ask questions and try to feel the answers… I try and feel his presence sometimes, but not all the time…. think of it as having an invisible FRIEND, yes, friend, this is very important… it makes all the difference. I guess for me this is part of what means – PLACING THEM IN YOUR HEART. With love and compassion… with true understanding of who the person is and the choices they make. This is a friend, not a foe… let them be there next to your being, do NOT deny the importance of their being… Let them be…. This is the first step to learning how to detach while staying in love…
on 20th of November I posted ‘happy birthday’ as for two days I was restless feeeling that P.P. b-day falls on 19 on 20th… now I was reading forum form the start and found him posting his date as 19th… on my son’s mane – I had no idea… this is seriously freaking me out… I am done with this…done.
Random phrases from posts keep popping up in my head, and every time it happens the true FEELING and the MEANING of it hits me… and the word again SIMPLICITY… we wrote pages and pages of stuff on here, yet it is SO SIMPLE… “Women fail to surrender… not to us.. to themselves…. “ The SOURCE… They don’t truly know themselves, and a Scorpio man will not invest his deep feelings of love into someone who is not in tune with their essence… When it is said a woman needs to be strong – she needs to be emotionally strong. He wants to know that she will not fall to pieces when things do not run smoothly. He wants to know that she will go on regardless of any trials and tribulations of this life. He needs to know that when she says she loves – she MEANS it every second of their life together. He wants to know that this love will NOT change the moment there are difficulties. He wants to know that she will keep this TRUTH in her heart, because it is the only way to overcome the obstacles this survival world places in front of us… And if all those UNKNOWNS become known to both – this will mean they (couple) are FOREVER. So he will probe and investigate, to get to the true CORE of what she is. He doesn’t want perfection. He wants to KNOW that the woman is capable of CHANGE… when the chips are down – she will transform those parts of her that have become redundant and are threatening their life. Because this is what HE will do too… Women perceive it as ‘games’… how tragic is that?
SIMPLICITY.
The domino effect of this learning curve… I cannot stop it now…
and the aching comes back… the more I understand the deeper I fall… the beauty and simplicity of it… it would be such a RELIEF to not be held hostage to stupid games that men and women play with one another… breaking free from the suffocating ‘reality’ of relating between sexes… I did too, while yearning for different… it’s like coming home… I am sooo-oo happy…
Here, ladies… the tools… If you look back to how you relate with those men in your life which are NOT your romantic interest…. work colleagues, neighbours, friends etc. etc…. you are the closest to your NATURAL true selves… why….The men who are not romantic interest to us – we are free to be open and honest with – because there are no fears to loose them…
Because there is no ROMANTIC envolvement – there are no ‘games’… games born out of fears – insecuirity (does he like me), rejection (what if he stops liking me), abandonment (what if he leaves the relationship), loss (how will I cope if he does), the list goes on… So. To counteract those – we search for subbtle clues of validation from our men – how often they call, what they say, how they spend time with us, how often, what do they do for us, endlessly… there is no LOVE in that, only a fear driven clingingness…
If every woman SUBCONSCIOUSLY could treat her man as the one she is NOT involved with (i.e. no fear of loosing him) she is the winner. The intoxication of being involved with such a woman is irresistable, as it grants both FREEDOM. Freeedom to be who they truly are. Well… we have our own minds to help us there. It does not mean you don’t love the man, it means you give you both a chance to BE.
I noticed that from my own experiences… there are men in my life who would love to get involved with me… I treat them as friends only… I can see now how that in itself fuels their interest. I am my natural self with them. Because I am not AFTER them in any way. And I have no fear of loosing them.
ignore the spelling mistakes… I write fast now….
And Scorpio men are a feminine energy sign… they are INTIMATELY familiar with those same feelings, amplified tenfold… unless they achieved the self mastery of an Eagle… Feminine energies are a part of their makeup… if a woman projects those insecuirities onto him – he will mirror them back, he will feel them though his own core, because HE himself has them, although they will manifest differently… our emotional dependency on him will DRAIN his own resources to the point of being so overwhelmed by this that he… he will walk away… or, if evolved, he will stand still and wait for you to change… and if you don’t – he will walk away still… think back to those people in your life who were SO MUCH into you… gave you SO MUCH attention and emotional drama, who WANTED so much attention and feedback in return… what did it make you feel like? Like running as far away as you can…. Again, no LOVE. Just NEED.
Great understanding Ines. Although most male Scorpio’s are in touch (aware) with deeper feelings/motivations far below the seen dynamics of accepted personality vice… most… (especially female Scorpio psyche)… are also very troubled and controlled by that dark turbulent ambivalence HAPPENING through their core nature… and so as a result they are unconscious from an emotional intelligence, and are non-communicative with people AND THEMSELVES around them. This energy especially happens to people who ‘are triggered’ by that intense Hades fluctuation happening within.
That existential fluctuation through my relative soul experiences are the normal animal-self ‘thinking’ Scorpionic manifestations, who’s behavior is sensual material seeking ‘who’s in it’ (whatever IT may be) for their immediate subconscious survival needs, or known indulgences among other baby souls. Detachment from real resolution by this level of being, during such visceral torment is actually undealt with by the masses. The self-lies to conceal the intensity of such feeling are unconsciously quelled in people. Because that “it” is their experienced unknown. And it is the unknown of their feeling which they mortally fear. Death has not purged such people or reshaped their core reality. They are not equipped with the necessary psycho-sexual weapons to ‘understand’ their feelings in the first place. So the mimicking, deflective fearful personality “normally” resumes their known game of— “guess what I’m feeling?”. As such, no evolutionary or revolutionary energy occurs or transcends between that herd/pack/flock state of human being. Fears, denial, delusion of soul and stagnation of mind on the surface known remain, and win.
The subconscious gems buried deep down in the Pluto/Venus/Moon psyche are RARELY (almost never) expressed and stimulated between sexual/emotional/intimate relations. Yes platonic (non-sexual) relations are easier for the animal-self Scorpio dweller to communicate, but that does not mean the lusty/greedy immediate surface need within that person are received and sent from the energy of Truth.
There is certainly an infinite distinction from a being who is highly attuned, through pain/suffered experinced in virtue of hell’s wisdom and of greater forces/feelings beyond ones ego myth, and the being who is “a believer” in their superficial vicarious myths, or flock influenced desires. The gifts of communicating this occult distinction (Truth) is an enormously brave deed and is as equally rare for “normal” people TO SEE. So the reality of mortal normalcy to meet non-questioned redundancies (energy/resource extraction of others) is fulfilled. This occult energy is happening within a person hundreds of times per day. Their spiritual freewill in the infinte breath is not harnessed and chosen. What is manifested in the momentary breath between the war of illusory ego-self and the divinity of soul-center is eternally apart. Many demons must be slayed and resurrected first through ones inner evolutionary experiences (the outer is the beleived lie) which is ones pysche of the illusory world he/she is a part of.
“That existential fluctuation through my relative soul experiences are the normal animal-self ‘thinking’ Scorpionic manifestations,”
Although you say ‘Scorpionic’ – ALLpeople will poses this type of energy, to varying degrees. The level of sensitivity will depend on their natal chart placements. Just wanted to make sure people understand that.
“and are non-communicative with people AND THEMSELVES around them. ”
Here we will have ‘blood from a stone’ scenario. How does one break through that barrier?
I had first hand and very INTENSE experiences which lasted for years with a female Scorpio friend… will write later…
Hi ScorpioObsessed!
Am looking forward for your post 🙂
Dear Lovemari,
Thank you so much! I am currently writing my post, and will post it soon–either later today or tomorrow!
Best,
Little Fish who is Scorpioobsessed!
Little fishy,
I will see/feel what comes to me after you share with us your adventure and murky Underworld concerns. I know you would love answers that are compassionate and yielding and “nice”… but at that same time, REAL RELATING with anybody begins and ends with you. The you of your identity on many levels of existence.
Puppy
Dear Pluto Puppy,
Thanks so much for your response! And you are right, being a super sensitive Little Fish, of course I would LOVE to receive a compassionate and “nice” answer! hahah! That is exactly would I would like to see, of course! 🙂 However, all comments will be highly appreciated and considered, no matter how caustic and harsh they may be! 🙂
I will finish the post tomorrow–it’s taking me forever to write, given that I’m extremely detail-oriented and am finding myself rambling with all the insignificant little bits of information.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
{{{Eagle}}}
I thought you were gone for weeks and months!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Here, pain makes one creative…
So deal with this the only way I don’t know how…
Blank canvas of the emptiness to fill away
through every agonising breath of ‘now’
and every darkest ‘now’ making up each day.
The fractured states of being that once were
are being washed away by virtue of hot tears…
Through searing pain of reuniting me and her,
through purple darkness of the ‘now’ she appears.
Blank canvass of this soul to gently fill away,
which carnage of the past has failed to sever.
Eternal love frees all from shimmering decay,
transforming every waking ‘now’ as ‘forever’.
NOW I know why a few hours back I was in agony…
“I thought you were gone for weeks and months”
I am here………….. remember.
When I have time I check-in. I just won’t be engaging as frequently compared to our interactive discussions in the past.
“who’s behavior is sensual material seeking ‘who’s in it’ (whatever IT may be) for their immediate subconscious survival needs, or known indulgences among other baby souls.”
And you look at me and you say ‘cool’…
And you think you can make me play…
And I look at you and I think ‘fool’…
And I think I will not stay.
And you send me a text “‘hi’,
Will you come and spend a day”
And I shrug my shoulders ‘why’
And I want to keep you at bay.
And you brag of your new job,
All the perks and a healthy pay.
And I know you think through your knob
And getting your wicked way.
Ha-haha… I am wicked too…. Why do you call the energy of TRUTH occult?
Dear Pluto Puppy,
Thanks so much for your response! And you are right, being a super sensitive Little Fish, of course I would LOVE to receive a compassionate and “nice” answer! hahah! That is exactly would I would like to see, of course! However, all comments will be highly appreciated and considered, no matter how caustic and harsh they may be!
I will finish the post tomorrow–it’s taking me forever to write, given that I’m extremely detail-oriented and am finding myself rambling with all the insignificant little bits of information.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
…I’m extremely detail-oriented and am finding myself rambling with all the insignificant little bits of information….
hmmm don’t tell me you’re virgo rising too? lol
You are so right LoveMari….unfortunately I am indeed a Virgo Rising!! haahhahahaha
“Yes platonic (non-sexual) relations are easier for the animal-self Scorpio dweller to communicate, but that does not mean the lusty/greedy immediate surface need within that person are received and sent from the energy of Truth. ”
You mean the platonic ‘conduct’ may still be a manifestation of the lower self… it is a measure of restraint in given circumstances, but if one digs deeper – there are desires which are driven by the lower self, desires to take without true giving… Is that what you mean?
Following from that then… true platonic love is void of such desires… no sexual greed…
Darling, may I ask you… is that what you personally aspire to? And… do you want to be loved as Buddha, and not as a man? Genuine questions…
“… Why do you call the energy of TRUTH occult?”
Because occult means hidden. And hidden means subconscious energy raised up and outward in breath to awakening. All charkra’s fusing as one.
“..it is a measure of restraint in given circumstances, but if one digs deeper – there are desires which are driven by the lower self, desires to take without true giving… Is that what you mean?
Following from that then… true platonic love is void of such desires… no sexual greed…
Darling, may I ask you… is that what you personally aspire to?..”
No. I don’t “aspire ” to a specific intellectual state of being. Human Intellect misleads the heart and soul. It veils the Truth most of the time. Aspiration in my world is ‘the incompletion’ of soul on an egocentric personality level. When you’re in constant battle-dance with the mind, heart and potent sex base energies BEYOND aspiring egocentric level (or creation) which I feel all the time… you too would begin to fathom the sheer power of-self which is IN CONSTANT WAR between the Higher and Lower self. That’s IF one has ‘found’ a Higher-self in the first place. So this constant war in my world is the ambivalence of killing the lie while exhuming the Truth I seek in the present breath.
You see, in my world, indifference to all complex feelings IS the actual lie. Those afraid indifferences and hesitations not confronted in the moment and actually felt from an egocentric awareness (or lack thereof) creates a huge imbalance within me energetically. The imbalance of energy naturally happening I seek to counter-balance is the self between the known tangible world and the eternal unknown spiritual world. The spiritual does indeed exist during material manifestation, but questions of the highest ethics, morals, structure, discipline, love and loyalty to ones core-self and others must be made raised up through the middle eye and made clearly conscious. The highest of ethical chararcter in the material world must be in sync with ones inner volition. Which means the seeking of a balanced energy of inward and outward manifestation.
I aspire for simplicity of being –through my lives and deaths. In case you haven’t noticed I can be a complex type killer… so I love the BASIC essence of animals and nature as a whole. When I look into the face of a happy labrador dog excited to see me, wagging his tail… I feel/sense that dog’s basic and eternal existence, in relation with the natural power (energy) of the universe. That dog, is MORE TRUE TO ITSELF than a billion dissillusioned humans could ever ‘be’. See??
“In case you haven’t noticed I can be a complex type killer…”
I noticed… Such as this ‘damsel in distress’ in the process of being saved via virtues of being ‘killed’… It seems that material plane of existence is much more complex than the natural order of things….
Oh this complex simplicity of your soul… Just as I step up – you present me with another challenge… Let me FEEL and UNDERSTAND… you know I will.
My heart aches every time I get another 0.05% of who you are.
….I feel/sense that dog’s basic and eternal existence, in relation with the natural power (energy) of the universe. That dog, is MORE TRUE TO ITSELF than a billion dissillusioned humans could ever ‘be’. See??….
Reminds me of my female labrador back home… very affectionate…oh she loves swimming too. Sometimes it is easier to manifest connectedness with another being through a dog because the dog lives in the present and will not judge you. The dog accepts you and loves you unconditionally. The dog doesn’t have heavy human conceptual mind and it always brings the “we”… “the pack”… Human mind has too much stuff going on… it is difficult to sense goodness…
OK, from the first feel of what you wrote…
“Those afraid indifferences and hesitations not confronted in the moment and actually felt from an egocentric awareness (or lack thereof) creates a huge imbalance within me energetically. ”
The manifestation of this imbalance… do you remember my post 1469… when I made that comment… almost immediately I began to feel uncomfortable and tense within… because it was a manipulative lie, I KNEW it, I FELT it… it gave me the most miserable feeling. It HAD to be resolved, or else I would remain in that state possibly for days. Tell me… is that HOW you experience the energetic imbalance? Please answer, it is very important…
However, remember it was resolved with your presence… OK, that was in the ‘now’, would you still feel the imbalance from the situation well past the ‘now’? You must have had experiences whereby people left and took that with them – and one must rebalance the carnage of what is left. Are you ONLY concerned with the ‘now’ these days? I feel the answer is ‘yes’… because self-love does not allow to dwell, only to reflect…. And breath from breath existence grants you the strongest volition, the strongest power over your own lower-self.
If so… our interactions with ego-bound souls require a massive conscious effort (as I have noticed myself now) to constantly pull oneself back to balance, which you mention here “must be made raised up through the middle eye and made clearly conscious.” On THIS level of sensitivity you will ALWAYS know and feel the lies that people create in order to conceal how they TRULY feel… and they will try pass off as happy – when they are miserable, and full of life – when they contemplate suicide, and composed – when they are seething inside etc. etc. SO you are bombarded by those lies hundreds of times a day (even in your desert you will be) You walk away – and realign yourself with the core energies flowing within you… Do you? Or do you do this as the exchange takes place? Attempting to nuke every person in your path (as you had done in the past) who is not aware of the exchange on that level – is pointless and futile.
I SEE why you are at constant WAR – within… I felt some inside – and even that was exhausting… If you didn’t find this soulful path four years ago – you would have destroyed self…
“I am here………….. remember.” I feel it. Protective spiritual arms….. Thank you.
“..Tell me… is that HOW you experience the energetic imbalance? Please answer, it is very important…”
Yes. The more sensitively attuned to “the force” and “to the underworld” in peoples minds one IS, the more I am triggered and am triggering within. Guiding or understanding that volcano of sensitive energy is not easy when you consider the mindless, cruel, ignorant and meaningless things/games people do and say all around us every moment. That “chaos” and meaninglessness all around us is unloving. Soulless. Blind. Mortal.
“..OK, that was in the ‘now’, would you still feel the imbalance from the situation well past the ‘now’?”
I’m balancing the now, right now before you, as I write and be, every single breath. No matter what life throws at me, my psycho-sexual arsenal (the energy I command) is ready for anything. I have a relationship with fearful energy. Meaning, I don’t live in fear… I face it and revere it’s power over humans, calmly.
“..If so… our interactions with ego-bound souls require a massive conscious effort (as I have noticed myself now) to constantly pull oneself back to balance..”
Yes. Massive consciousness. That’s why when one evolves through the force, one very much needs to know who he is, who the world of people is and why it is, and who, why and how the mind works in other humans. That is the spiritual warrior path. He does not separate from the chaos and bullshit. He confronts it. Slays it dead. Injects new life into it and gives transformation. Again… know thyself. That phrase is much deeper than just words on a page.
I have a plane to catch guys. Lots of stuff going on for a few days.
Ines… it’s better to just feel. Explaining my existence isn’t something I enjoy doing. If people ask, as you have, that’s fine. Simplicity is evolved. No… not a Simpleton. I said simplicity. Evolved is infinite because the power and appreciation of it’s awareness and perceptive ability. Evolved listens, sees, feels and hears people/life much differently than the vice and disease of personality. It’s great you have curiosity Ines. Don’t lose that passion for something higher and meaningful in your life. Your life will become harder and richer more than you know. The flock and pack of others ignorance will test you over and over. So that’s why you must be ready.
Love
Pluto
I understand, darling…. I have seen your reality and your existence… I have felt it… I TRULY understand now, you don’t need to explain anymore… I needed to ask, you know that and thank you for being open… Now is to follow my spiritual path, remember I said once I go to the very end… and it is a never ending process… I know you are here for me…
I love you, all of you.
Just be YOU. Be well.
I thought a lot about writing my story – I wanted to share my experience in the hopes that this forum’s helpful readers will be able to also offer some insight since this situation is currently consuming my life. First, some background info on myself. I’m a 32-year old Pisces woman. I am a person who is very social and who has many close friends that I am very grateful for but I have chosen, in my life, not to have very many relationships with men since I am quite choosy and I also do not like to devote myself unless my partner is really worth it; I always get attached very easily and so always thought hard before getting involved. For the longest time I thought my rising sign is Scorpio and while I am most definitely a Pisces and identify with most of its characteristics (giving, emotional, imaginative, flexible, not assertive, escapist) I also have many Scorpio traits (absolute [ie. black-white extremes, detective skills, possessiveness, intensity, vindictiveness) and because I always had a proclivity to the sign (I have many Scorpio friends and for some reason I always felt an intense attraction to Scorpio men and they to me [even before I knew they were Scorpios]—perhaps that is a reason why I don’t have any good male friends who are Scorpios!), when calculations showed that my rising sign was Scorpio, I felt that it was correct. However, a month ago it appeared that my recorded birth time may not be accurate, and the alternative time which now seems is the right one indicated that my rising sign is Virgo instead. As far as I can tell the only Virgo traits that I have are that of being extremely detail-oriented, prompt, and organized; with this version of my chart the planets appear to be in the following positions: Moon in Aries, Mercury in Pisces, Venus in Capricorn, Mars in Pisces, Jupiter in Cancer, Saturn in Virgo, Uranus in Scorpio, Neptune in Sagittarius, and Pluto in Libra. To be honest, I was disappointed to have Virgo instead of Scorpio as my rising sign…I would feel stronger perhaps if I had Scorpio rising!! I think also my chart almost seems to confirm the fact that I am really not very assertive and do not stand up for myself often. Anyhow, to return to my story, since April ’08 I have been in a relationship with a 30-year old (2 years younger than me) Gemini man who I will call Adam. I love Adam but our relationship has had a lot of issues from the beginning which I kept trying to work on persistently for the first 2.5 years—most importantly the main issue is our lack of sex life (which was very infrequent in the beginning, and now nonexistent) which has to do with an issue that Adam has. For the interests of brevity I will not go into this since my focus is on the Scorpio man but I should mention that I tried very hard to help Adam the Gemini solve his issue in a variety of ways; unfortunately he never admitted to it and as a result I have felt huge distance between us since we do not connect in this way. That coupled with the fact that we live 10 mins walking distance from each other and yet he never wanted to see me more than 1-2 times a week, plus never fully included me in his life always made me feel like I was “wanting” more and chasing him for his time & his body. All of my friends tell me they would have broken up with him because he is not meeting my needs but because he is a very good person and means well (and does love me in his own way), along with my “suffer silently” and non-confrontational character took me a very long time to realize that the relationship had serious issues. We were, and are, much more friends than lovers. In any case, I never once looked at other men, and never thought I was capable of cheating—an act which I reprimanded in others—and always thought I was superior to doing something like that (boy was I wrong!). In Aug. ’10, I began my MBA, a 13-month very rigorous program. Enter the Scorpio, who I will name Tom. I had met him at the beginning but had not paid any attention to him whatsoever. Tom is 28 and is 4 years and 8 months younger than me. Starting late Oct. ’10, he began to approach me in a very friendly way. I was friendly back to him (as I am with most people that I meet) and had mentioned my boyfriend from the beginning (everyone in our class knew since I always brought him up as other attached persons did with their significant others). I should say here that our program required us to be in class for very long hours, often 8 hours a day (since it was an intensive program) and we had to do a ton of teamwork which made us often spend almost 12 hours a day with our classmates. Starting November ‘10, Tom the Scorpio started contacting me on an almost daily basis – that is, when I was home, studying during the evening hours, he often would message me late at night, and later on during late November he would start to call me. At first I didn’t think anything of it—I thought that it was a bit strange at first, and when his communication starting taking place on a daily basis, I wondered if perhaps he was interested in me, but then quickly would nix the idea since I thought to myself: 1) he knows I have a boyfriend, and 2) I’m almost 5 years older than he is (not that I have any issues with age, and to be honest I look much younger than I am—I look about 23, 24—people are usually shocked to hear I’m 32). In addition, my mother is 7 years older than my dad and my parents have a very successful marriage—so I don’t have any hang-ups about that, but I mention this because most people unfortunately do have an issue with the younger man, older woman thing. But in any case, in my mind + or – 5 years does not mean that much. To return to the issue, most of the emails/phone calls would take place late at night, and I usually responded since they were friendly and I often felt lonely being home alone (my Gemini boyfriend hardly would come over) and so I would look forward to his messages and would usually reply quite promptly. Since they were purely friendly, I didn’t realize anything out of the ordinary was going on. I began to really enjoy our conversations and thought I was lucky to be making a new friend. However, as the time went by, he started very *very* subtly flirting with me and putting in suggestive comments in the phone calls and texts. I wasn’t sure however, and refused to believe it; at first I felt rather uncomfortable and started trying to mention my boyfriend a bit more and even put him in my Facebook pictures so that Tom wouldn’t get the wrong message. However, he persisted, in a subtle way that only a Scorpio is capable of, and when I started to think that perhaps my messaging back and forth and friendliness with this guy was beginning to border on “inappropriate” (not that he had done or said anything suggestive, but inappropriate in that my mind was that I was getting too caught up in it), I realized that I could not cut him out. I couldn’t cut him out partly because he hadn’t really done anything wrong, and at the same time I was so beginning to enjoy our communication and the attention from him that it was impossible to stop it. Later on in December, Tom began to get more aggressive with his pursuit of me, in a way that almost made me feel uncomfortable at first, but flattered soon after. He asked me about my relationship one night that we were out with a group of people and told me that he had dated a woman who was 7 years older than him a few years ago and had a small child—he told me they had great sex! (Months later, he has admitted to me that he told me these things in order to “get it into my mind”…). Around Christmastime, I had a party at my house and he stayed late to help me clean up while Adam left early (no, he didn’t stay over or stay till the end as a boyfriend should do). In general, over the next few months, Tom the Scorpio became more aggressive in that he become blatantly flirtatious, and we would communicate almost daily (even though we would see each other in class) – he would call me or message me. As time went by, I began to look forward to our talks which often took place late at night or messages that went back and forth constantly. I even would be in class a few meters away from him and he would be messaging me like crazy. He would stalk me on Facebook constantly but also tried to find our information about me through mutual friends, and he researched my family as well. As I mentioned before, he ended up becoming very aggressively flirtatious, but since he had never asked me out I enjoyed the communication and became flattered that he seemed to be so into me. I developed a little crush on him, partly because he projected the image of a sensitive guy, but also conveyed through what he told and wrote me, that in a relationship he was fully devoted to his significant other (I did not realize this at the time but because he had understood some of the issues that I was having he made an extra effort to present himself as an ideal candidate for being in a serious relationship—as some cynical friends of mine say, “he had studied your profile quite well”). He made an effort to show that he was mature, wanted something serious, etc. He and I also had a very similar sense of humor that made it really easy to talk and laugh together. In April, we ended up having, 2 nights in a row, a conversation partly on the phone and partly online that was 9 hours (till 7am, pretty much the whole night). Both times it got out of hand in the sense that while he never revealed his feelings to me directly, we discussed personal stuff about our relationships and I kept telling him, a few hours into the conversation, that this was out of control, and that it was inappropriate and that we should probably stop chatting. However, neither of us was able to stop. He charmed me. During the 2nd night we chatted he invited me to his house at midnight, and I said no and said that it’s best we continue chatting online. I knew it was a booty call—and I freaked out when he invited me—I didn’t feel ready and plus I already was feeling majorly guilty about our conversations. I also revealed to him some of the issues I was having with Adam the Gemini since Tom the Scorpio kept pressing me. I will say this once that Tom was really the master at flirting and at making me feel like he was extremely into me. However, I felt guilty after that and for the next month through the end of May I told him we should meet up to discuss what had “happened” (ie. the chatting). My plans were to tell him that I even though I had issues in my relationship with Adam, the truth of the matter was that I had a boyfriend and as much as I loved talking so much with Tom, I didn’t know how much more of this I could do since it was really making me feel guilty. However, The Scorpio Tom was not straight with me and we had made plans three times to meet up one on one to discuss, and all three times he ended up cancelling at the last minute. This ended up frustrating me very much—it made me feel almost like he was playing with me. To complicate things, I was becoming extremely mesmerized by him to the point where I had memorized his SMELL. Yes, his body smell, and whenever I would be in our class building and I smelt him, I knew he was somewhere near even though I hadn’t yet seen him. I had it bad for him and I didn’t know how I could erase my feelings and desires. Throughout May, he continued chasing me by sending me aggressive flirtatious messages, but when I would directly tell him to meet up he would avoid it. All of a sudden in late May, when hearing that I went to a party with my boyfriend (from a mutual friend of his), he suddenly became vindictive—that is, he started ignoring me, leaving in the middle of our conversations (but lying and saying he fell asleep, for example), trying to make me jealous with other girls, and just stopped calling me. At the same time however, at times he would be flirtatious (display the previously “hot” behavior), but then revert back to being cold. He did this for the duration of the summer—and I was completely crushed. I tried to be friendly towards him, but what disappointed me is that he basically chased me for a good 7 months, and then I felt like he alienated me in a nasty way—not only was he unfriendly, but started playing silly games that even to our mutual friends (from our class) were obviously vindictive and childish. He also used mean tactics to make me jealous and even did things that a friend would not do – ie., he would promise to lend me something I needed (a textbook for example), and then would suddenly tell me that he wasn’t in town to give me the book and leave me hanging (even though I could have borrowed the book from someone else instead of him insisting I get it from him). I got very sad and frustrated—not only because I felt that I was mesmerized by this man but also because I couldn’t understand how his behavior could change so dramatically overnight. A friend would not behave that way I thought. My suspicion, and my friends’ as well, was that he wanted me to break up w/ Adam, and since I hadn’t (even though I had mentioned we had issues), he got frustrated, and decided that a hot/cold ignoring technique would “get me” (I will return to this since he admitted this on his own a few months later). Of course, there were some small signs during the summer that he was still into me, as at times he would bring back the “hot” side, but in general, he went out of his way to diss me and make me jealous. I felt very sad , because I had always been honest with him and had NEVER used my relationship in any way or form to make him jealous—if anything, I had tried to be consistent in my behavior and “upfront” after our Marathon conversations, and over three months I was sad to see a mean streak in him. However, I have to say that my interest in him unfortunately did not diminish and there was always chemistry between us. To make the long story short, one night in September ’11 during the last day of our program, we went to drinks to celebrate, and he was extremely flirtatious to me at the bar and offered to drive me home. He dropped me off but the sexual tension in the car was extreme and could be sliced with a knife. As soon as I went into my apartment I got a text from him asking me if I was sleepy and telling me that he was unable to sleep; he said we are both thinking the same thing and so I told him, I think we need to have a discussion about this, why don’t you come over now otherwise let’s meet one day during the week. And he responded, I’m already on my way. We began to have a discussion when he arrived, he told me “ You bring out something very sexual in me—if someone were to ask me if I wanted to have sex with you I would say yes”. I told him, “listen, I’m in a relationship with Adam, and while you know it’s not going well, I do love him, and he loves me—I’ve never cheated on him, despite our problems—what exactly do you want me to do—to break up w/ Adam and date you instead?” And he responded, saying that he wanted me to do with my relationship what I was planning on doing regardless of him. He said, I think your relationship is over, whether you admit it or not, and whatever this thing is with me, it doesn’t have anything to do with your relationship. I then told him, you are right, if I were completely and deeply in love with Adam, I wouldn’t be here with you…I then turned and told him that I was upset that he changed his behavior over the summer as I thought we had a friendship…and the rest of the conversation is a blur…I remember that I told him I wanted to get some water at that point as I was feeling dehydrated (it was almost 5am) and he said I’ll go to the kitchen with you, and then he literally pounced on me and started kissing me. He was so intense that he was biting me as he was kissing me! I was in shock, and he kept saying, how I drove him crazy for almost a year and how he had said to himself that he didn’t know what he would do if something didn’t happen between us. I was in shock but I felt like I was almost in a trance, I felt finally, this is happening, between us, and while I had guilt, I told myself, open up yourself, do it, because with this guy you are feeling emotions and sensations that you have not felt with anyone before. He told me I was on fire and we ended up having sex for 5 hours. He told me that this was the highlight of his year sexually and how he didn’t think it was easy to find that two people would have such an amazing sexual connection. I agreed with him. He told me it drove him crazy how I was such a good girl and conservative but in bed I was on fire. And how he had imagined that it would be like that between us—and that while I have the image of a goody two shoes, he knew I’d be like this—he had sensed this. He had imagined all these different scenarios with me sexually he said—I had driven him that wild. And that he knew it would come naturally between us and would be amazing. He told me he’d never met anyone like me before. When he entered me, he said “it feels like home”. When I was sleeping afterward, I would open my eyes and see him staring at me next to me. When I tried to sleep, he wouldn’t let me move even an inch away from him in order to sleep, he wanted to cuddle and have me sleep in his arms. I was overwhelmed, partly due to the guilt, and partly due to the fact that I adored that he was so giving and into me, but I felt liberated. I felt such a connection with him, and also had the best sex (which I always would talk about myself as not being very sexual—I know now that is partly because I wanted to explain my staying in a sexless relationship). The third time we saw each other he told me that he had told all his best friends about me, and that he told one of his four guy best friends that he didn’t feel at all guilty seeing me because my boyfriend was “nonexistent” (ie. not present very much in my life). And how his friend supported him and said, that’s not a relationship, what she has. So go right ahead since you guys are happy and having a good time. Over the next month, we continued to see each other twice a week and I would have an excellent time with him every time, but there were a few contradictions in his behavior. For example, while the sex and the contact with him was always amazing, he had a sadistic side to him that would come out and he seemed at the same time intent on hurting me. That is, he would say things like, are you a jealous person? You should be tied up while seeing me with another woman (as a joke—but nonetheless sadistic). Or, he would tell me that he realized that I needed to be “dissed” for a while in order for me to be interested in him (something which was completely untrue—the reason I ended up sleeping with him was that I couldn’t hold back any longer—not as a result of having enjoyed being “dissed” by him during the summer, when he was hitting on other women in front of me). He would also tell me that he wanted to punish me when we were in bed for not only what I did to him during the year but also at the present time. Of course, this had sexual undertones but I felt like he really meant it psychologically. He would also tell me that he wanted to hurt me and that he thought that I was the kind of girl that would enjoy him hurting me, both physically and psychologically. And that he had imagined that he would cause me pain, and wanted to hear me scream in pain. He also told me, in bed, how he liked to play mind games and how he thought I responded to him in that way. He also said that he liked to be in control and wanted to set “his rules” in bed. But I had no problem with that, and sex with him was “effortless”. However, on the other hand because he had such a caring side and I adored being in his arms, I didn’t pay attention to these comments at first because at the same time he would say other very sweet things. He kept talking about marriage and children—where and when our wedding would be, what our children would be called, where we would live–of course, as a joke, but in my mind, because he kept persisting, I was sure it was to see my reaction. (In my experience, one does NOT joke about these things—in none of my other relationships which were more serious did we ever throw around such so-called “jokes”). He even asked me what my parents thought of him and what kind of man my father wanted me to marry! He would tell me other very sweet things, and also that indicated that he was thinking that we were the perfect match. At the same time however, he kept giving me mixed signals—that I shouldn’t think that once I broke up w/ Adam it would automatically mean that we would start dating, or that he wasn’t sure about a future with us. He told me he knew I would break up with him since I’m an ethical person but he also said that he understood that it would take me a while to break up with Adam as it’s in my nature to delay things a bit. But he kept on giving me confusing signals. At times he would tell me that he’s not sure about the future—but of course I thought that was only natural since WHEN does one know about the future when first embarking on a path together? I never got the impression that he was interested in me only for sex since we knew each other for a long time and when he would come over he would sleep over, he would cuddle with me, we would talk—essentially, we had a strong connection besides sex (although the sex was shockingly intense—usually on average 5-6 hours per time). Also, while he would contact me to meet as well, I was the one that contacted him a lot more than he did, in terms of messaging and calls to see him and to see how he was doing; and the weird thing was that on the phone he acted very different from when we were together—cold, and as if we were just acquaintances (not like our conversations in the prior months which lasted for hours). My friends said that “he has the upper hand”. I never much cared for this (and in the past all of my boyfriends had the upper hand) but sometimes I felt like I was asking to see him more than he was, and because there were such contradictions in his behavior, I felt often unsettled and needy. From the start we had said that we were exclusive sexually together—at HIS suggestion—he made a point of telling me that he would not be sleeping with other women for 2 reasons: 1) he didn’t think it was ethically correct, and 2) he said he loved our sex so much that he thought he would not be into sleeping with anyone else he said, that it would displease him as it would never be as good as with me. Hence, it would be pointless even to try to sleep with other women, he said. Of course, on my part, he knew I did not have sexual relations with Adam so he was covered. The 6th time we met he even brought his toothbrush but stated immediately: “This does not mean we are boyfriend-girlfriend—I just want to leave my toothbrush here”. But I knew that he wanted to have me thinking about him more, and the toothbrush was a tool for just that (perhaps another mind game?) —he only came over 2x a week, and most guys usually shy away at the idea of leaving their personal belongings so soon. Not to mention that I had not broken up yet. In addition, he would have jealous spurts, from time to time, for example, he would tell me that the clothes I was wearing were too revealing (when they were not—I am very conservative by nature), and ask me if I wanted to attract other men! But then he’d retaliate quickly and say “Not that I care—I’m not your boyfriend”. He would bite me all over my body when we were together (ie. when kissing me), and I would have bruises from his bites! When I would tell him to stop it, he would say, “Why, no one will see your bruises, CORRECT?”. I knew it was his way of leaving his stigma on me. Again, I had never experienced this before. When I told him it hurt and that I didn’t want that, he said, I can’t help myself, I’m so into you that it comes out naturally. When I asked him why he was into me, he told me that he loved the way I thought, how I felt, my whole thought process and how I operated…and how he appreciated how I “could stand him for so long”. When I replied, it’s not that long (this was the first month we were sleeping together), he said, you know what I mean. I knew he was referring to his erratic hot/cold behavior during the year. On our graduation night in October which took place after a month of seeing each other I was elated that he introduced me to his parents and his mom acted like crazy to meet me and my parents. His parents were extremely friendly and super nice to me, and later on he told me that he had told his parents we were seeing each other and that I was a very good person. Later on that night he drove me home and held my hand in the car while driving with his other hand and said “Perhaps are we dating now?” (earlier that week I had told my boyfriend that I wanted a breakup and we had agreed to separate for a while). Basically, after every “session”, I was on a high for days. I had such an amazing, INTENSE time with him (I adored the intensity of it), that I felt like I was on a sort of drug high (even though I’ve never tried drugs in my life, I will bet that my high from the Scorpio would surpass even a drug high). I was happy for 3 days after seeing him. I’d never felt that way before. However, soon after I became single, Tom the Scorpio’s behavior did not change at all and could even be characterized as becoming a bit indifferent. Soon after I was “free”, a long weekend came up and since I was newly single I asked him if he wanted to go away for one of the days of it (not the whole weekend, 1 out of the three days)—I told him, how about taking a day trip together or going somewhere. He told me he would get back to me and call me to let me know—and then he disappeared for several days! Saturday night (when the weekend was almost over and I was furious at not having heard ANY response from him since I had not planned anything as I was waiting for him to respond) he texted me (not called, but texted) to meet him for sex as if everything was normal! I was livid, and didn’t respond, and within 3 hours, I had 2 phone calls and 4 text messages from him—again, acting psycho (“where are you, why are you not responding”—as if I was supposed to respond to him IMMEDIATELY [within 3 hours!], unlike him who had taken SEVERAL DAYS and had NOT responded at all till the weekend was almost over—talk about rude). The next day, I got another 2 phone calls and text from him. I was still infuriated however as basically I could have planned to go somewhere that weekend and had waited for him but not only that, but the whole week I had called him twice and texted him and he had not called me back one time and not responded to my texts. In any case he called me again the day after and he told me he wanted to come and see me and I said yes (I was cold to him on the phone but didn’t mention anything on purpose as wanted to see what he would do) and he came over to my apartment with pastries and immediately apologized for his “terrible behavior” he said. He didn’t offer a reason however (as to why he had not called me to reply and let the weekend pass just like that—I told him, was it too much to ask to just send a text to let me know?) and when I pressed him he told me he thought my invitation was too soon and “ a bit too much”. I was astounded, and became really angry—I said, excuse me, because I’m now officially single, I figured you might like to have a change of scenery and get out of the house—we spend 12 hours together at a time and how is it threatening to go away for the day? He said to me “We are not dating, we are not boyfriend and girlfriend”. And I said “but we are seeing one another, and all I suggested, was a change of scenery, for a CHANGE”. I thought he would have been happy that we would not have to be “hiding” since it was now “legal” to do something outside my house. I should also mention that when I was with Adam, he (Tom), had made cracks about us going away for the weekend (when he knew, that at the time, it was NOT possible, well now that it WAS possible, he had behaved in this confusing manner). At that point we hadn’t seen each other in 10 days and I asked him “Did you miss me?” and he responded “I missed having SEX with you”. I was shocked that he turned it around to imply that all he wanted was sex. And he spent most of the evening to try and throw innuendos that all we were, were friends with benefits, much to my chagrin. I decided to test him, and when we went to go into my bedroom, I told him, let’s not go into my room, let’s go into the guest bedroom (which was just as nice, and almost identical to my room). He said “why?”, and I responded “Because, I will smell you all over my room and sheets after you leave, and I don’t want to be sad and have withdrawal symptoms”. Now, I knew by this, that admitting to this (basically almost that I wanted to be with him so much), almost that I was in love with him and that I couldn’t take to smell him in my room and not have him there, he would realize the depth of my feelings. Basically, not *realize*, as I was always open with him about my feelings from the start, and he already knew, but be “reminded”. I thought, if he views this as just sex and if he wants me not to view this thing between us so seriously (and does not want me to be crushing on him), then he will not have an issue. As soon as I said it however, his face lit up and he said “why, are you trying to forget me and get rid of me that easy?”. I said, let’s go into the guest bedroom, it’s the same. And he said, NO WAY. I said WHY? And he responded by saying, your bedroom is just more familiar. And I said no, we’re going into the guest room. After 2 mins., he FORCED me into my bedroom, practically picked me up against my will. He also acted like crazy, asking me about 10-12 times if I’d been with another man during the weekend that we had not seen each other when I was angry with him (of course the answer was NO, obviously), and told me that if I dared to ever sleep with another man he would come find me and force me to have sex with him 3 times he said, and he would show me that no man can ever make me feel the way he does! I am just writing this as an example of his little ego/jealousy spurts that would come out from time to time. Several days passed after he left, and while I texted him, he responded in a casual way. The weekend was coming up , and I was sure we would see each other as usual. I waited to hear from him (since he had apologized and had tried to make things right—I felt like it was up to him to contact me to see me—and I wanted to see what he would do), and was sure either Friday or Saturday he would call me. He didn’t. On Saturday I met up for coffee with a mutual friend of ours who I will call Isabel (due to being in grad school together the Scorpio and I have a ton of mutual friends). She told me she had called him and he had gone away for the weekend! I was infuriated again. I thought to myself, when we texted on Friday around lunchtime he never mentioned he’d be leaving town. And not only that, but now that I was single he was suddenly leaving for the weekend without even caring to see me or so much as mentioning it to me? I should also say that soon after our graduation he had started a very demanding job which required him to work 12 hours a day, which meant that his spare/leisure time was transferred to mostly weekends. I was shocked and I just couldn’t understand his behavior—which was quite similar to the previous weekend. Finally, my own vindictive side came out as the weekend passed and I didn’t hear anything—not even a phone call. I was sad that the man who I had become obsessed with, attached with, in love with, now that I had become single, was showing an indifferent side, even a sadistic side. I forgot to mention that he made sure I found out from third persons (the Isabel girl) that he was away without so much as “bothering” to even inform me directly of his plans. I went on Facebook and wrote a status update (that I knew he would see immediately as he stalked me on Facebook) that said “When the future is unexpected, perhaps the past should be reconsidered”. Of course, the future had referred to him (The Scorpio), and the past to my ex-boyfriend (The Gemini). This was true however, since Adam had contacted me to try to get back together. Sunday night, within 20 mins of me having written the status, I had a phone call from him (we hadn’t spoken since the day he had left my apartment after our “session”). I didn’t pick up, and then he called again within 15 minutes (his spastic behavior had started once again, once he was afraid of losing me, suddenly he made an effort). I called him back later that night and he acted completely indifferent and as if everything was fine. I was irritated that he didn’t so much as mention how come he never told me that he was going away. Later on, after we hung up the phone, he im’d me and began a conversation asking me if something was up and how I wasn’t that friendly on the phone. I responded, that under the circumstances, since we had such “infrequent” communication, I thought my stance was normal. He said okay, yeah, it’s true, we didn’t speak at all for days. I said yeah, how come in the texts that we sent, you never happened to mention that you were going away that day (the last text was Friday). He responded, “I didn’t think of it—it’s that simple.” I said, “you didn’t THINK that we were gonna see each other over the weekend, so you simply neglected to mention it?”. I was really angry, because I felt he was playing mind games again—how was it possible that when we would see each other until then every weekend, he somehow “hadn’t thought” of telling me that he would leave?!?! I KNEW he was being sadistic, doing his “dissing” as he probably thought that would make me “want” him more. This reminds me that two weeks before, when we were in bed, I commented on how his communication was not what it had been, and I asked him (in a nice way), how come you didn’t respond to my texts (I had sent him simple text messages asking him how his first day at work had gone, etc.). and he said to me, “we are not boyfriend-girlfriend”, and I said, “what does that have to do w/ it? If you don’t want me to, then I won’t send you any other friendly texts like that again.” And to that, his response was, a sadistic: “Can you handle it? Do you think you’ll be able to resist and restrain yourself? I doubt it.” This is just an example of how he expected me to be able to be okay with him not responding (even going to the point to dangle it in front of me—that he wanted me to be “begging” for his attention—sadist!) , but when *I* dared not to respond to him within 2 hours (e.g. the time when he had never gotten back to me about leaving for the wknd but then expected that I would be at his beck and call when he wanted sex) he would act crazy-obsessive. He then said, “why, am I supposed to apologize when I decide to go away for the weekend?”. Then I responded, “No one said you shouldn’t go away, I just thought you might have decided to inform me”. To make the long story short, the online chat didn’t go well. I was in a dilemma as I really didn’t understand—I was now single (for two weeks), and if anything Tom had shown indifference (except the two times that we had seen each other those two weeks), with all the erratic behavior and communication in between. While in the past he had mentioned that it was my issue what I did with my boyfriend (whether to break up or not), I knew those were just words as at some point (the 3rd week we were seeing each other), he said: “Why are you delaying your breakup for so long? Is it out of insecurity?”. He even asked me once, “Do you kiss Adam when you see him? Do you kiss him with tongue?”. So I knew that, he was not as “indifferent” as he wanted to seem, and while he had said the issue did not concern him, of course he wanted me to break up. That’s why I didn’t get why he was behaving in this way, making me feel like I was almost begging for his time, was unrespondent (although of course the two times that we saw each other after my breakup the sex was amazing and he was fully into me as I noted above). It had now been 1.5 months since we were seeing each other, now the beginning of November. I should also mention that one time in bed, he told me that he thought that in the weeks to come, I’d be “begging for him”. Crazy-sadistic-obsessive, whatever you want to call it. One of my good guy friends who is a tough/absolute Aries (and very protective of me) told me that he thought Tom the Scorpio was bad news and that he was playing mind games etc, and he said you should get back together with Adam (who had contacted me as I mentioned above to get back together) and stop seeing Tom, plus I’m sure Tom will chase you if you diss him. The Aries pressured me and pressured me, telling me that Tom the Scorpio was a chess strategist (he was chess champion for years, and all about strategy) which translated into him being a “game player” with me; my Aries friend told me that he thought what Tom had done was unacceptable—basically tell me all these contracting things (about marriage, etc.), to get me to break up and want to be with him, and yet, when I did break up, he suddenly became more unavailable and seemed intent on playing sadistic mind games. And he said, you are such a good girl, and for this guy are you lying and cheating, I think he is bad news. He also told me some things that he’d found out about Tom being an opportunist which made me infuriated (I don’t know if they are true), and influenced me very negatively towards him. I don’t know what got into me, but when the Aries instructed me to send a nasty final message to Tom the next day (who had asked to see me), I followed his instructions. I regretted the message almost as I was sending it. I don’t know what came over me—I told Tom that he wasn’t what I was looking for and that he had really disappointed me (which was true, but onto the mean part now)—that I decided to try again with Adam—to make a new start—and that there was “no more room for him “. I basically told him I’m getting back together with my ex and that I’m cutting him out of my life in a TEXT message–VERY MEAN, I still can’t believe I sent it. The Aries was convinced that Tom would chase me. I was a complete idiot not to follow my heart and see Tom and discuss things and I took this action which was out of character completely. Well, I got back an extremely mean message back from him which basically said that it was me that misunderstood him, and that I was being dramatic, and that we saw things from a different viewpoint and that he had been crystal clear with me from the beginning (NOT!)—that I am making a big deal out of nothing; basically, he implied in the message that I misread his actions and the underlying tone was that it was just physical (as if all the contradicting signals that he gave which I described above can be characterized as “clear”—I think NOT). I cried as I read the message and then a month of misery and daily crying on my part ensued. Not only was I an idiot who regretted this ridiculous action that I took, I couldn’t believe that I’d let myself be pressured and influenced by a person who was not even involved in the situation (the Aries). And the message was very mean—it was not my style to write something like that AT ALL. Well of course Tom didn’t chase directly, as he is super proud and egotistical, however, during the first two weeks he made 2-3 attempts to organize gatherings w/ our mutual friends (and we have lots of them) and have them invite me (but he hid that he was behind it—however, given that I have great detective skills—I found out). I didn’t go to these gatherings however. A month later in mid – December I decided to put an end to the nonsense after the prior two weeks I did what he did ( to try and see him at friendly get-togethers) and he did what I had done and didn’t show up (but to punish me, he had told the friends that he would show and last minute not come—of course, to have me be in anticipation-sadist!). So I sent him a very nice text message in December telling him I really wanted to meet up with him and discuss things—but only if he wanted to, I said. I was expecting him to not respond or to drag it out (him being a sadist) however he responded in a very nice, friendly way saying that he wanted to see me as well and that to meet up starting next week (I sent the text on a weds) since he would be going away for the weekend. I was elated. However, you can probably tell that it was not so simple (again, I repeat, him being sadistic). Over the next 3 weeks, he contacted me (after waiting 9 days after I sent the original text to contact me) to meet up and we made plans to meet three times, and all three times he cancelled a little bit before! I was enraged and extremely upset. Crying etc. I didn’t understand how someone could behave this way—I thought, if he doesn’t want to see me, he shouldn’t have responded so positively to my first text. My Aries friend again said “I told you so”—he plays games and he wants revenge. HE is not a man, and certainly not for a lady like you. Perhaps I said, but at the same time I felt—I KNEW—that the Scorpio wasn’t over me, as of course that it was not over between us—how could it be? I had ended it prematurely. However after his last cancellation text, in which he said “Perhaps we can try to talk tomorrow afternoon to see if maybe we can manage to meet up” (Lukewarm), I just didn’t respond at all to him as I had had it—even our mutual friends that liked him couldn’t believe his behavior. I thought that’s it, he’s like the little boy who cried wolf—I just didn’t believe him anymore. The next day however, even though I had never replied, he contacted me to meet. I responded very cautiously ( as I was afraid he would cancel again) saying I wasn’t sure, and asked him to suggest a time and place, and that I would see if I would be able to make it. He then responded that he wanted me to tell him when it was convenient for me and where. I didn’t immediately respond, and he texted again, saying, 9pm, your place. Of course I knew that he wanted sex when he suggested my place and I responded to him, why don’ t you come by, pick me up and we can go for a drive. Ok? And that is what we did. I almost was afraid he would cancel again. But he came, and I purposely had him drive around for an hour while we made senseless small talk. Finally I told him, ok, we can go home and once we got to my apartment I told him that I wanted to see him because I wanted to apologize for my behavior with the text message—I told him that it was really mean of me to send it and that it was inappropriate, and out of character for me. I told him that instead I should have handled the situation differently and that I knew that it was probably shocking for him to receive such a nasty text out of the blue, which basically cut him off. He told me he was glad I told him that, that he thought it was silly, and he said, did you expect me to chase you or want to see you after that? I said no, I understand (it’s like he knew I wanted him to chase). But I said to him, listen, let’s not forget that while what I did was very inappropriate, it was triggered by your behavior the two weeks I was single. And he said to me: “I didn’t promise you anything—we were not boyfriend-girlfriend”. And I said yes, but if you remember the first conversation that we had the night before we hooked up the first time back in September, when I told you that I want a relationship (when I asked him what he wants out of his life), and you had responded the same back to me. And also, I think that you know I’m the type of girl that can’t handle a purely sexual relationship w/ no strings attached—you know me, and my character for a whole year—what do u think I am? Your f*** buddy? He said, no, obviously it was not just sex, and I’m not saying that—but just know that I wasn’t thinking that it was something more at the time. I loved the sex, it’s the best ever for me and I know for you, but I really didn’t think of us as being in a relationship or as something more. I said to him—how is it possible that you didn’t think of it—are you saying it didn’t cross your mind? What about ALL THE THINGS YOU SAID TO ME? And then, I asked him, listen, let me get this straight: are you saying that you want to keep it only sexual? Because hey, it’s great for the both of us, but sooner or later this is gonna get old and we’re gonna want something more. He said, I know, I agree. So, I continued, do you think there is a future for us? If not let me know now please, as there is no point to continue talking otherwise as I think you know me , my character, and what I want. No, he said, of course I think there is potential and a future for us…you know it wasn’t just sex. If it was purely sexual, he said, I wouldn’t have seen you so many times. At that point he asked me , what’s going on with your relationship? I said, it’s over, in that Adam and I don’t have a sexual relationship, we are technically still together, but the breakup is close. And then he got furious and said, your relationship is SO over, and it was over before anything happened between you and me. Adam was not treating you correctly, he said! I got furious and said, don’t talk about Adam like that, it’s none of your business, he’s a very good person. Btw, I thought it was very ironic that he was criticizing Adam’s behavior, when he (Tom) had not behaved at all well himself. However, he said, why are we discussing a future and if there’s potential if you’re still not broken up he said? Which obviously was correct, but I had told him that I’d be breaking up soon. At some point he pounced on me and told me that he couldn’t resist me and that he’d missed me and asked me if I’d missed him. I knew all along it wasn’t over—and that we would have many more such meetings—I was just angry at myself for having lost 2 months with the ridiculous message that I’d sent him. We then had sex for 7 hours and later on when we were in bed he asked me 3 times whether we would have an open or closed wedding ceremony (I tried to ignore him), and then asked me again three times as to whether I’d want a baby with him…again I tried to ignore him. At some point, in bed when asking me to do something sexual that we hadn’t done before, he told me, my accomplishment was that I succeeded to get into your mind, after you get in one’s head, all the sexual stuff follows….And later on he was sadistic again as he bit me and bruised me from his biting and told me that I should never have messed with him, that he is a Scorpio and that he always wins, he always wants to be in control he said. And that he wants to set HIS RULES. Of course, being the indulging little fish, I told him that yeah, I realized that, and I like it when you’re in control (I really do though). I then told him however, you’re a sadist, you didn’t need to string me along for 3 weeks and cancel three times before seeing me, you play games with me. No, he said, I don’t play games. Furthermore, he told me that he was expecting me to write him to meet up but that he was shocked that I managed to keep it together for that long, and that he was amazed that I lasted a month…now isn’t that sadistic? Also he said that the night I sent him that terrible text message, he managed to sleep very well, and that he didn’t lose any sleep over me whatsoever…Later on told me that we would be exclusive again and that he won’t be sleeping with other women, and since I didn’t have a sexual relationship either, then we were good to continue. I was elated again, and I could tell he was as well. I was in a high again for the next 3 days…thinking of him constantly. I had been planning the following week (it was New Year’s that weekend) to break up w/ Adam and didn’t want to see Tom till I did, I thought, I’ll handle things more correctly this time—I’ll be broken up, I won’t be insecure this time, and hopefully things will go well, and we can rebuild and take things further. However, a week later, right after New Year’s, Tom and I were both invited to a housewarming party of one of our mutual friends. I found out he was going, and one of my friends said—you see now, he’ll start showing up to the events, since now he wants to see you, and he’s not punishing you any longer. And that was what happened, he texted me that night, but indirectly, to find out whether I was going (he didn’t directly ask me, he wanted to make it seem as we had run into each other casually—but I and all my friends knew he was coming to see me). Later that night we left the housewarming together and he drove me home—but he was totally cold in the car. He parked in front of my house and said, okay, bye. I said “What? Why are you behaving in this strange way, I said to him, last week you were all over me and now you’re acting indifferent again?” (btw he hadn’t even kissed me during the whole ride home, he acted like he was talking to an acquaintance). And he blurts out “I’m not in love with you, and I don’t think there’s a future for us.” I said WHAT? (Remember how he had said that there was potential, only 6 days earlier!!). I said, “Tom, I thought that last week we discussed that since we seem to have an amazing connection on various levels—sex, communication, humor, friendship, etc., this is grounds for meaning that there IS potential for something more, I don’t understand what you mean about being in love—why do you need to be in love to be in a relationship? You can’t just “date” and see how things go, take them as they come? No, he said, this is how I am. I almost started crying then, but composed myself, and said “I have very deep feelings for you, and I was planning on breaking up w/ Adam this week , as I couldn’t do it during the holidays, I felt very guilty and this is psychologically difficult for me [meaning, the cheating]” and he said “I know you have deep feelings, and I know you were not planning on breaking up w/ him during the holidays as it would have been mean; last week I felt guilty afterwards after the stuff we did as I know it’s unfair to you as you want more”. I said “is it because of my age?”. And he responded “yeah perhaps I need to find a girl the same age as me or a bit younger, as you may want ‘other things’, in the future…”. There I became angry because he knows that I’m the most easygoing person, I was the most lax girlfriend, never pressured my boyfriends for marriage, kids (in fact I’m not even sure I want kids, and I’ve never felt a biological clock ticking or all that typical stuff women face—perhaps I will in a couple years, who knows, but I didn’t think I’d given that impression to him), and I said to him, in a kind of cry baby way “okay, if you feel that way then, if I have any sense of decency and self-respect after the things you just told me then I need to get out of this car now and leave”. Dear readers, you can’t imagine how hurt I felt–I felt like someone had stabbed me with a knife through the heart. But then, it’s like he transformed himself, and this intense and tortured expression came over his face and he grabbed me and started kissing me, groping me, and said: “You know how I feel about you, and you know it’s not just sex, it’s way more than that with you”. And I said, please, I should just go now, what you said before really hurt me. And he turned to me and said, “you bring out something extremely sick and twisted in me, you know that?”. As I looked at him, shocked, he yelled “You’re the biggest whore I’ve met ever in my life!”. And he gets out of the car and grabs me and says get out, we’re going to your place! And I said what? (by the way the time was 3am and he had to wake up at 7am to be at work by 9am). And he says, take my hand, and then turned, and said “the problem happens when we are alone together, the two of us.” There I was livid, and told him to go find a younger girl so that he can “handle” her and have the upper hand with her…he became infuriated and slapped me in his rage. I realized then that I am a “weakness” for him, he can’t control himself around me, and for some reason this brings out sadism in him (my theory). We then had sex for hours again, and it was the most intense and powerful sex ever. Even though part of it felt like we were battling, like we were at war. I told him that I wish I’d never met him, that he is a curse on me ( I could tell he sadistically loved that, but that’s not why I said it, it is the truth). He told me that I am a masochist and sick for letting him do “all these things to you” (he meant psychologically)…he said , you’re a masochist, you love being hurt. I said, NO YOU’RE THE PSYCHO, as you admitted before, there’s nothing sick going on in my head. He said if it was just sex between us, he would have only done it once, maybe twice, with me, and not seen me again. He told me that I sensed exactly what he wanted and needed, and how he couldn’t explain it, but that he loved how I indulged his every deep dark fantasy (of course, I’m a Pisces!) and I had no taboos in bed even though I was such a good girl who had been so selective with my prior (very few!) partners. He left my apartment at 6am only to go home to sleep for an hour and then go to his corporate 12-hr a day job! Since then we have only spoken on the phone once for 5 minutes ( a week ago) and then this week, since I was sick with acute pharyngitis, I sent him a short text to let him know and casually asked him how he was, how work was, etc. I have been out of commission due to not having a voice, fever, etc, for almost 10 days now and so that’s why I sent the text so that he wouldn’t think I’ve disappeared. He responded half a day later, curtly, not even asking me how I was feeling. Also when he called me last week, right before I got sick, he didn’t suggest to meet up, and even though a week has passed he didn’t even so much as text to see if I was feeling better—nothing. And now I’m at a dilemma as to what to do as I’m afraid , what if he doesn’t want to see me again due to the intensity of the night last week? I started seeing a psychologist because I feel so desperately in love with him and she believes that he has very strong feelings for me but is trying to kick them because he has major control issues and with me he feels like he loses control and doesn’t like it. Also I didn’t mention this earlier but he has an inferiority complex with me (even though we have similar backgrounds, I’ve lived all around the world and he hasn’t travelled much, etc.), but has often made comments that show he’s in awe of me. Even though I’ve NEVER thought once I was superior to him or anything like that. Also from things he has said, the relationship he had with the 7 years older woman with the child a couple of years ago he said that she had told him from the beginning that it would only be sex and nothing more. However he said that they broke up because they wanted different things, and one time when he and I were in bed together he told me that after her, he swore he would never get involved with an older woman again. However if he was happy w/ it being just sex why would he say they wanted other things (when SHE was the one to set the terms, that it was only sex, he had said) when they broke up and why would he say that he didn’t want to get involved again with an older woman? This indicates that he did fall in love with her, and couldn’t handle the pure sexual relationship. I went to a numerologist who told me that (without knowing anything about him or his past) that he was in love with someone at exactly the time that he was dating the older woman and how it didn’t go well as he was very upset it didn’t work out, etc. Well, on more than one occasion, he has brought her up and told me that I have a lot in common w/ her—apart from the fact that they had great sex as well, he said that her birthday was a day before me—she on the 27th, me on the 28th of Feb. And how she also was previously w/ a man who didn’t fulfill her sexually—left her sexually deprived as the expression he used—and didn’t treat her the way she ought to be treated he said. And while he’s had other girlfriends before her and after—he always seems to use her as the reference point. Well, it’s obvious she’s had a significant impact on his life even though he seems to want to downplay it—and I don’t understand why he is giving me such CONTRADICTORY statements. Also, and this is the insecure part of me, I love Adam, and I will be sad to break up w/ him, and I often make the mistake of thinking, well, if Tom doesn’t’ want a relationship, why should I rush to break up w/ Adam? I like having Adam around as he’s like a very close friend, almost like a best friend. Why should I let him go as well and then I’ll be completely alone? I don’t want to hurt him and so I want to avoid the breakup, in a way. On the other hand, I realize that by being so unfaithful I’ve already hurt him more (even though he has no clue) and I am living a lie—I never thought I’d be one to do this…I know this post was long and that I included too much detail so I applaud all those who stayed with me for this long and read everything. People often say that words don’t count, only actions. However I disagree—I think that words can provide great insight about what is going on in a person’s psyche (I’m a psychology major!), and that is one of the reasons why I included so much detail in this post—I think that what he has said to me paints to those that don’t know him, a bit of an inkling of what he is composed of. I feel desperate as I really want to be with him—I feel like with him I have sensations and feelings that I’ve felt with no other man; I feel ecstatic when I’m with him as I feel like he, on his part, senses what I need and I’ve felt no such connection before. I also used to think, before his sadistic side came out (or when I refused to believe he was a sadist), that because we had such a good rapport (call it communication, call it sense of humor) for a year almost and it was so easy to talk to each other, for hours, that this was grounds , along with the fantastic sex that he on his own has said is perfect and the best ever, that it would be grounds for a relationship. And yet, I feel terrible when he disappears, I feel terrible now (almost like I have withdrawal symptoms!) that he hasn’t even cared to ask me how I’m doing when I’m sick, nor to see me, and I feel like I’ll have to grovel again to see him…and what if he doesn’t want to see me at all? Do you see how he contradicts himself? I don’t understand why we can’t just see each other, and see how it goes? Any advice will be appreciated…
Scorpioobsessed,
A long story, damn it… I’ll read some more, to comment futher, but just to tell you… Pisces Virgo rising here… while we may come across as prudish – it hides a total lack of control over our own inner emotional/sexual urges which are at times all consuming… and destructive when entering an emotional/physical relationship with a man.
Dear Inessology,
Thanks for your really interesting comment…that is exactly what most people perceive me as…as restrained, conservative, even prudish some would say. I didn’t realize that the combination of signs played such a role in this lack of emotional and sexual self-control ? Indeed, I feel all-consumed by this and that this is almost destructive for me (hence my comment to Gatubela in 1511 when I said that I’m trying to moderate my feelings for him…I doubt I’ll manage it). The Scorpio has told me several times that he had imagined that I’d be like this–and that he understood me from the beginning, how I really was “secretly sexual” he said, and that this antithesis, of sorts, drove him wild. Of course, I now know and have seen that he loses his own self-control with me, both sexually and psychologically–perhaps one reason why we are so compatible…I’ve always felt (and he has said pretty much the same for me) that he knew exactly what I wanted–and so perhaps that is why we felt so intensely passionate.
“and that he understood me from the beginning, how I really was “secretly sexual”
For him this understanding is MUCH MORE than just about you being sexual… he intuitively understands your EMOTIONAL makeup. And all the fears that he sees in you – make him intensely troubled. Your insecurities – become his. Mari is right – you BECOME his weakness. Unless you do something about it – it will destroy the relationship.
Ditch him. Enough said.
Yes I read the whole thing.
Good luck.
Hi S.O.,
Wow…thanks for sharing your story. It was very interesting and open. Psychology major…darn. I don´t know too much about psychology, but perhaps I can share too?
Your story is actually the first one that is more open about the sexual aspect…and there, I am not an expert. Meaning, I have never really used my sexual energy for a sexual relationship with a man. I am doing other things with the energy because i perceive it as something beyond me.
You don´t mention if you love him or not.
Dear Gatubela,
Thank you so much for getting through my story…it’s so long, that I am happy you managed to get through it!
Yes, the story was quite open about the sexual aspect…hope I didn’t shock anyone! Many of my close friends tell me that even though they are displeased with Tom’s erratic behavior, they say I should be grateful to him for one thing: for putting me in touch with my sexual side, which up till before him I downplayed, and I always told myself that it’s not important to me.
When you say if i love him, do you separate that from being “in love”? I do–I would say I feel “in love” with him but honestly, I’m not sure if I love him yet. I’ve always felt that love is something that develops with time. With Adam for example, I love him but am not in love with him. Also, to be completely frank, I have feelings of anger and rage towards him right now which have to do with his treatment of me (his hurting me–sadistic tendencies, the hot/coldness, disappearing acts, etc) which I am trying to use a defense mechanism against “love” since I already feel desperately for him. .I am trying to rationalize it in order to prevent myself from feeling any deeper (although I doubt I’ll manage it, since I’ve never been logical with such feelings–have always submitted to my emotions instead).
I would be very interested in hearing your insights and let me know if you have any other questions.
“Many of my close friends tell me that even though they are displeased with Tom’s erratic behavior, they say I should be grateful to him for one thing:”
Do you live by what your ‘close’ friends’ opinions are of YOUR relationships and life? You already saw how one WELL MEANING advice can backfire….. Who do you listen to: them or your own self?
Hi ScorpioO!
…..I realized then that I am a “weakness” for him, he can’t control himself around me, and for some reason this brings out sadism in him (my theory)…..
Sounds like you become his weakness and he becomes your weakness for allowing him to fall into his own weaknesses. In relationship you have to be in tune with each other and understanding how to assure that the other does not fall. Like he has to have your back and you have to have his. But it comes down to… do you love Tom? What is love for you? Before you call or sms Tom, ask yourself if you are just calling him because you need him sexually or do you love him and you want the best for him? You have to really reflect and ask these questions within yourself.
Also I feel that if you truly love a man regardless if he is a Scorpio or not there should be no other guy in the picture. Well of course with Scorpio this is unacceptable… I feel that every time you reconsider your relationship with Adam every time Tom disappears…. Tom gets very unstable maybe that is why he contradicts himself. Your instability and insecurities makes him feel insecure and unstable. So is it Tom or Adam? Or none ?
Find your inner strength to decide and choose what is right and raise those energies. Remember woman is the love energy you have seek love within you first.
Thanks for sharing your story. I would love to hear more.
Love,
Mari
Hi Little Fishy,
I loved your story, it is the classic, CLASSIC scenario between a Fishy girl and a Scorpio guy – when BOTH are immature and are riddled with fears…
BTW I am 26th of February… and know EXACTLY what is going on within you.
OK then… just to start you off… you say he is a psycho and he contradicts himself and plays games, which implies he is lying to you… read through those:
“You know how I feel about you, and you know it’s not just sex, it’s way more than that with you”.
“he said , you’re a masochist, you love being hurt.”
“And then he got furious and said, your relationship is SO over, and it was over before anything happened between you and me.”
“I didn’t promise you anything—we were not boyfriend-girlfriend”.
“why are we discussing a future and if there’s potential if you’re still not broken up”
“that he loved how I indulged his every deep dark fantasy (of course, I’m a Pisces!) and I had no taboos in bed”
“He told me that I am a masochist and sick for letting him do “all these things to you” (he meant psychologically)…he said , you’re a masochist, you love being hurt.”
“he told me that he was expecting me to write him to meet up”
“Later on told me that we would be exclusive again and that he won’t be sleeping with other women,”
“No, he said, I don’t play games.”
WHERE in there did he lie? WHERE in there did he say anything which did NOT apply to how things were at the time?
And look at your REACTIONS:
“I got furious and said, don’t talk about Adam like that, it’s none of your business”
“There I became angry”
“And I said, please, I should just go now, what you said before really hurt me.”
“I told him that I wish I’d never met him, that he is a curse on me”
Not liking to ‘get hurt’ much, are we? No emotional drama, is there?
Hi LoveMari and Inessology,
Thanks so much for your initial comments. I’m a bit confused with how to reply to people’s responses (right after each post separately or as a new post?) but in order to make it clearer I’ll respond to each comment as a separate post but will refer back to the original post by its number so everyone knows what I am answering. In reference to LoveMari’s post # 1512—LoveMari, you raise some good points that need further analysis. Listen, I always thought that Tom has no reason to be jealous of Adam or to mind that I still hadn’t broken up with my boyfriend since he knew (and believed, he never doubted me on this as he told me this recently) that I had no sexual relations with Adam (which is the truth—I would never EVER have sexual relations with 2 men), and that he (Tom), was the highlight of my life sexually. However, when looking at this situation abstractly, I realize that I come off as super insecure and unstable myself—I keep saying I will break up, but then it takes me a while to do it (during the first phase it took me a month)—so perhaps Tom wonders if deep down I really want him/love him, otherwise, as you say, wouldn’t I get rid of any other guys from the picture? Perhaps during this period he formed a worse opinion of me? I don’t know why I feel so weak and insecure in breaking up with Adam—on the one hand I don’t want to hurt him as he is a good person and I like having him in my life—I wish I could just magically transform our relationship into one of friendship without having the drama of the breakup. You are right, I really need to develop my inner strength and think through these issues—and be prepared for all the nasty consequences that may arise.
Inessology, I will now respond to your comments.
Hi Inessology,
Referring to your last comment of my post of 1510, I completely agree with you that Tom the Scorpio intuitively understands my emotional makeup. On a related note, it is my personal opinion (and he has implied this as well) that we wouldn’t connect so well and intensely on a sexual level if it weren’t for a strong emotional connection as well. However, I agree that I if I don’t deal with my insecurities and fears, it could destroy everything. Regarding your comment of post 1511, I have learnt my lesson with taking friend’s advice…after the fiasco when I let myself be guided by others, I swore that I would never follow that path again and would do what *I* feel, not what others deem to be correct for me. But yes, you are absolutely right—it caused me so much pain last time, that I vowed never again to make a decision based on what other people think. Now, regarding your post 1513, I was happy to hear that you comprehend what I’m going through…and it’s funny to hear that you feel that my story is a classic scenario—I really hope so because I’ve been feeling like it’s quite different/unique, so I was glad to see you write that! I would like to ask you, what do you refer to when you say that mine is a typical case of the Scorpio man-Pisces woman scenario—that is, can you give me an example—perhaps from your own experience? Especially because you have the same sun and rising sign as I do, etc.
Now, onto the quotes that you brought up. It’s true, I don’t want to get hurt, but what person does? I feel however, that perhaps I am more willing to “try” than he is. Of course, there is a ton of emotional drama (and I’m the first to admit that I am a bit of a drama queen, and I love the intensity of it). Looking at the quotes you selected, plainly, I have to say that you are absolutely right that they were true at the time and he didn’t appear to be lying. However, he *does* play mind games with me, which he has admitted on more than one occasion. He is so calculated in his actions that he even counts the “like” on Facebook as displaying interest—he used it to his advantage when he was trying to “woo” me and then when he wanted to play games he hasn’t put a single “like”—but makes sure that I see that he “likes” photos of other women, etc. All to get in my brain.
Anyhow, I’ll be really interested in hearing your thoughts on this classic scenario and if you can elaborate on how we are both immature and riddled with fears. It’s true that I fear he will hurt me (he has already), as I feel that he takes me to a “darker” place. At the same time however, I feel mesmerized by him and feel like I’m in a trance—I don’t know how to describe it. Also I would say that I’m definitely insecure but I’m not sure I would call myself immature—however I think he is displaying a bit of immaturity.
Thanks again for your helpful comments and insights and for taking the time to help me!
Best, Little Fish who is Scorpioobsessed!
Hi Little Fishy,
Well, there are so many layers in your story… Neither of you UNDERSTAND fully the nature of the powerful connection that exists between you two, i.e. the nature of WHO you individually are. You both allow yourselves to be swept away by the feelings of ‘lust’ , without actually asking how love comes into it and IF THERE IS love, and what LOVE means to both of you…
I will quote P.P. here “Although most male Scorpio’s are in touch (aware) with deeper feelings/motivations far below the seen dynamics of accepted personality vice… most… (especially female Scorpio psyche)… are also very troubled and controlled by that dark turbulent ambivalence HAPPENING through their core nature… and so as a result they are unconscious from an emotional intelligence, and are non-communicative with people AND THEMSELVES around them.”
After the episode in the bedroom he goes away for the weekend without telling you… well… read the above passage again and understand WHY. He NEEDED to be away from you, to look inside himself and dig deeper into his own state of being. Because.. he is falling hard for you, girl… Have you tried to step out of your own bubble and look at the situation from HIS perspective? Have you tried to really FEEL and SEE what he sees when he is with you? Look into your own emotional state of being and UNDERSTAND that ambivalence of intense feelings – he FEELS those same feelings times ten… Look into your OWN emotional state of being AGAIN and what makes you – YOU. Notice any FEARS? There are PLENTY.
He sounds like someone who, although aware of his own inner demons, still has a lot of growing up to do in terms of HOW HE DEALS WITH THEM. Maybe what he sees there in you – is making him so damn unsure of self and of you. “I feel that he takes me to a “darker” place.” Damn right!! Why… I refer you to my post 1501/1502
He will SUBCONSCIOUSLY exhume every little detail of your insecurities .
“However, I agree that I if I don’t deal with my insecurities and fears, it could destroy everything.”
Hmmmm… it is good that you understand you have those fears… but you need to know WHAT they are and HOW they affect your view of the relationship and subsequent REACTIONS to anything your man places in front of you. To do that you need to know your own HEART first and how your mind affects your heart.
My best
“You’re the biggest whore I’ve met ever in my life!”.
I had a similar comment from Scorpio No.2 All it means is how uninhibited, no barriers you are in bed with him… All men (not just Scorpios) will pick up on subtle clues within a woman which point to that quality. Considering the reserved demeanor we display – it comes as a shock to some he-he…
I am aware that you, up to now, have not realized this exists within you… but you may use it SUBCONSCIOUSLY to guide and control the man into your universe, using the power of sexuality to ‘keep him within’…
And THAT is not love either.
“He is so calculated in his actions that he even counts the “like” on Facebook as displaying interest—he used it to his advantage when he was trying to “woo” me and then when he wanted to play games he hasn’t put a single “like”—but makes sure that I see that he “likes” photos of other women, etc. ”
He is displaying an obsessive streak which is something lower-self Pisces and Scorpios have in common… Through my ‘battles’ here on the forum and also in real life I’ve learned that I can either channel this into a higher passion state where this energy is applied to achieve a constructive solution, or I can succumb to this obsessiveness and make it into a fully blown fear, such as ‘No contact from him, he must have forgotten I exist, let’s check the mobile phone, answering machine, Facebook (well, I don’t have a facebook account) a gazillion times, let’s ask friends where he is and what he does, let’s not sleep at night thinking a million thoughts’… do you get the picture?
So I am learning that it is necessary to say NO to yourself and find ways of removing an obsession. How – is unique to each one of us.
“That dog, is MORE TRUE TO ITSELF than a billion dissillusioned humans could ever ‘be’.”
The dog eats when it is hungry, wags its tail when it is happy, growls when it is threatened, sleeps when it is tired, howls when it is in pain, plays when it feels like playing… It does NOT process its immediate states of being through ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’, it does not project THOUGHTS from the past and into the future, thoughts of pain, betrayal, suffering, hurt, others’ opinions of it, conformity to ‘norm’, expectations of others, its own ‘needs’ to love, hate, lie, deceive, pretend… it just is, here in the ‘now’ in its existence.
Humans are ‘cursed’ by the conscious awareness of the world around them, and THIS, this consciousness is, again, our best enemy and also our best friend, if we want to return to SIMPLICITY of being. That’s why being TRUE to who we really are requires seeking to become ‘the highest ethics, morals, structure, discipline, love and loyalty to ones core-self and others”. It is a God’s given gift, forgotten and thrown away in the rat race of everyday existence. Is the dog moral? Yes. It is true to itself, i.e. it has morality of its pure essence. It is not the ‘morality’ of the ‘law of the land’.
“The highest of ethical chararcter in the material world must be in sync with ones inner volition. Which means the seeking of a balanced energy of inward and outward manifestation.”
CONSTANT awareness of every moment of HOW and WHY you choose to communicate with the world. And that will require IMMENSE will power (inner volition).
“Your life will become harder and richer more than you know.”
It is a beautiful paradox. The SIMPLICITY will make life HARDER, because it will collide with the accepted ‘norm’ of what life is, among millions of others. Dissolve into the TOTALITY of existence… I feel the concept and it is making me lose my mind… you know how one tries to imagine the infinity of universe… have you ever TRIED to do that? This is when one feels like EVERYTHING starts disappearing from sight, and the walls of the room close in and the mind fragments into million of bits and NOTHING remains… It is IMPOSSBILE to conceive of it…
Eagle, I TRULY UNDERSTAND now. .. you have chosen a hard path, darling… Here is one fear for you… do I have what it takes? I know I know… do the best you can, everything will follow.
Love
Ness
Dear Inessology,
Thanks once more for your insights. To respond first to post 1517, exactly, he is obsessive. Of course, I have this obsessive streak as well. However, I don’t try to immaturely use it like he does but sometimes it does take over my life—ie., what you wrote about checking Facebook 100 times a day to see if he posted anything, cell phone, etc. etc. It is hard for me to stop my obsessive behavior however, and I’m not quite sure how I can go about it. Regarding your last 2 comments of post 1516 (I’ll respond to the longer first comment in a separate post shortly), because the whore comment was made at a time when we were in his car, while I completely agree with you that it referred to me being uninhibited in the bedroom etc (despite how reserved, as you say, we may look—indeed! 😉 ), I also feel that, because of the way he said it, he implied that he can’t get me out of his head (refer back to my whole theory on his losing control, weakness, etc.), and I think that’s another reason why he called me a whore (figuratively)—because I get him to waver (one minute he was telling me he’s not in love, and that this isn’t right, and then the next was screaming at me to get out of the car and go to my apartment with him). But you are absolutely right, until now, I didn’t know it existed within me (returning to the sexual power now), and I think I am already using it subconsciously as you say, and will continue to do so (if I ever see my Scorpio again!). As for my fears (the comment above), I would say my biggest fears are a) not continuing what we have (or to see him again, as there is no guarantee on that), and b) getting even more involved and having him not wanting me or telling me he doesn’t want to continue. I will now respond to your longer comment of post 1516 in a separate post in a little bit.
Thanks,
Scorpioobsessed
“I think I am already using it subconsciously as you say, and will continue to do so”
What???!!! Did you read what I said about ‘that’s not love’?? Manipulating his responses to you…. Carry on so…
“not continuing what we have (or to see him again, as there is no guarantee on that)”
What the heck DO you have? Have you ASKED yourself that???
“getting even more involved and having him not wanting me or telling me he doesn’t want to continue.”
You are NEEDY… needy and not able to see that… Little Fishy, BEFORE you consider carrying on this lust based interdependent ‘passion’ you have to have a REALLY good look at yourself… It may come as a shock what you discover.
My best
Dear Inessology,
Thanks for your answer. Of course, I am very needy, and I do know it. It is my weakness, if you want to call it that. I’ve always been like this by nature, and I’m not quite sure how to make myself “less” needy (another reason why I have had few romantic relationships—as you I wrote in my first, original post, one reason for this is that I get attached easily and as a result become very needy). Also, the manipulation is obviously not love…as for the lust-based interdependent passion, because there is so much of it, and because it is both emotional and sexual between us, I always thought that passion comes first, but perhaps can develop into love with time. I will respond to your previous post of 1516 now.
Hi Little Fishy,
“I always thought that passion comes first, but perhaps can develop into love with time. ”
Well… sexual passion is of course a wonderful element in a relationship… but imagine removing it from the picture COMPLETELY… imagine that the ONLY relationship you are ever having with Tom is platonic… what is left? You say there is an emotional connection… Maybe you could try and determine what this is based on… What do you actually KNOW about this man aside from the FACTS of his life such as college etc. etc.? Can you see WHO he is if you stripped all the information about him down to basics? What are his TRUE values in life? What would make the foundation for love when neither of you KNOW each other…
You see, you haven’t been consistent with him, such as still holding on to your relationship with Adam. He returned that inconsistency to you = mirroring you, such as I am not/I am in love with you… mirroring – a way of SHOWING you where your weaknesses are…. If you are not sure of who you are and what you want – it will be a repeating pattern until one of you (him most likely) had enough.
Dear Inessology,
I’m responding now to your first comment in post 1516, and later on in this same post to 1520. I also read your and Pluto Puppy’s post of 1501-2…to be honest I didn’t fully understand all the factors described in that post, and I need a couple more days to digest it and think about it. I agree with what you say in that he is definitely aware of his own inner demons…but he doesn’t deal with them very well. Also you are correct in that I’m sure (even though he’s never expressed it) that it bothers him I haven’t broken up yet (although I had initial breakup conversations with Adam this weekend and it is leading towards that very soon). You also sharply noted that after the whole scene in the bedroom he went decided to disappear without so much as telling me…he has admitted to me a few times that he is very moody. And in fact throughout the year of knowing him he has displayed moodiness very suddenly many many times. I also think it freaks him out to be viewed as some sort of “boyfriend replacement”—which I do not think I did during our first phase but perhaps I subconsciously did when I asked him to go somewhere for the day that long weekend…am not sure. As for the question of love (also analyzed further in your post of 1520), when I saw the caring side of his personality (during the year, the non-sexual caring side), it was really endearing to me, and when we would communicate back and forth with long emails or phone calls, I really enjoyed getting to know him better as I felt that he had many elements in his character that made him a good person (and this, for me, displaying goodness and kindness, is what will trigger love for me—this is what made me love Adam, for instance). However, seeing the sadistic, destructive, DARK, elements of his personality (and I do not mean the sexually sadistic, I mean psychologically sadistic) troubled me and made me wonder how “good” of a person he really is. Because while on my part I have been indecisive, needy, perhaps a bit selfish, I do not try to hurt him/harm him psychologically and have always tried to be upfront with him…hence, the disturbing qualities that I see in him prevent me from loving him at the moment as he has tried to hurt me many many times. And that makes me very sad. In the meantime we haven’t seen each other in two weeks, with only one 5-minute phone call 10 days ago. I am wondering if I should call him to see him, or wait till the breakup conversation with Adam is “finalized”, perhaps at the end of this week. This way, as you have also smartly written in 1520, I will be more sure of what I want. Although, I’m not sure how more consistent the situation will be, as perhaps he finds it “convenient” that I still haven’t broken up, as he gets to have the upper hand, something which he has proven, is very important to him…
Thanks again for your useful insight.
“I felt that he had many elements in his character that made him a good person (and this, for me, displaying goodness and kindness, is what will trigger love for me—this is what made me love Adam, for instance). However, seeing the sadistic, destructive, DARK, elements of his personality (and I do not mean the sexually sadistic, I mean psychologically sadistic) troubled me and made me wonder how “good” of a person he really is.”
So you will ‘love’ a person who displays ‘goodness’ only… ‘Love’ with strings attached haha-haha…. talking about ‘conditional’…
How much of a ‘goodness’ do YOU have within yourself? And is it ONLY the goodness in you? Let’s say there are some dark murky character flaws in there… Would you love YOU? Hey why would anyone want to get involved with… any of us…
What is ‘goodness’ anyway?
“I do not try to hurt him/harm him psychologically and have always tried to be upfront with him…”
Hmmm… let’s see…
such as being with Adam at the same time…wait… you have broken up with him….oh wait… not yet “”freaks him out to be viewed as some sort of “boyfriend replacement” – did you EVER tell him ohterwise?
Or… “there is a ton of emotional drama (and I’m the first to admit that I am a bit of a drama queen, and I love the intensity of it” – does HE? Does he love emotional dramas that you are giving him?
Or…”On the other hand, I realize that by being so unfaithful I’ve already hurt him more (even though he has no clue) and I am living a lie” – and Tom is in the picture while you ‘rationalise your options… speaks for itself, doesn’t it…
Or…”All of my friends tell me they would have broken up with him because he is not meeting my needs” – You are looking for a man to FULFILL you? How about fulfilling yourself YOURSELF first?
Or…”I basically told him I’m getting back together with my ex and that I’m cutting him out of my life in a TEXT message–VERY MEAN.” – he-he
Or…”I went on Facebook and wrote a status update (that I knew he would see immediately as he stalked me on Facebook) that said “When the future is unexpected, perhaps the past should be reconsidered”.
Shall I carry on? It takes two to tango…
Here, Gatubela once said :
“Society “abuse” criteria, is shamefully lacking in healing a girl, don´t you think? It dualistically classifies “abusee” and “abuser”..and prevents us from understanding OUR role in the whole “IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO”…
Get it? Who is psychologically torturing who…. Fishy, you fail to SEE your own role and your own DARK side in this.
Hi Little Fish,
I don’t really write ‘smartly’, ‘rightly’ or ‘sharply’… I write from the heart,,, which I didn’t know I had, before I came on here. I came in with ‘all guns blazing’ and arrogance the size of Everest. And I was shown a dark, disturbing side of me which was unknown to me. UNKNOWN. It HAD to go, and I willed it to go…
Just because one is not consciously AWARE of their intent to harm or manipulate or extract something – it doesn’t mean one is not doing it. None of us CONSCIOUSLY set about harming others. Yet we all do it or have done it, one way or another. When one communicates with someone on every level of existence, first thing one has to ask themselves ‘Is my intention here – to gain something? Or is my intention here is – to give something?’ i.e. keep another’s person reality in my heart and do what is soulfully right for them.
The same goes for DISCERNING what others’ TRUE intentions are towards US.
To give you an example from your own story… You place a cryptic comment on Facebook… What was your TRUE intent there? To elicit a response, make the man ‘reconsider’ = manipulate him = take, leech off his energy. And his actions… ‘like’ status of women’s photos… again the true intent was to manipulate you = take, leech. So when you asked to show HOW you both are emotionally immature… well, this is how. How does any LOVING intent come into this? There is no TRUE HONEST communication between you. Just plain ego based games… Do you get the picture?
The thing is any Scorpio man, no matter how unevolved (and yours sounds pretty unevolved) longs for a level of honest communication and integrity from his woman. If he can SEE that in HER – he will CHANGE accordingly and BECOME that man himself. Scorpio men seek to change and transform… He is much more than what you see on the surface. Can you see that in him?
Dear Inessology,
Thanks for your comments. I will respond first to your three comments to my post of 1521, and then to your longer post of 1522, which are related. Regarding the my own dark side etc., I will have to disagree with you here and say that all the things I mentioned that I have done were more reactions to his actions (the sadistic, immature, etc.). One example that proves my point is during the 10 months that he was “wooing” me, I never once used my relationship to make him jealous and often downplayed it so that he wouldn’t feel badly. On the other hand, even though I was always honest and NEVER provocative, he, during the summer (when his “dissing” of me began) hit on other girls in front of me, made comments about all the different girls he was seeing, and to top it off was cold, very unfriendly to me—it was his doing, and his alone. I remind you that later on, during our first night together in September, he told me in bed that I needed to be “dissed” in order to fall for him. Something which I thought was very disturbing.
Again, to take you to the wooing stage, I had never promised him I would break up nor had he ever expressed to me outright that he was interested, and so I thought his behavior was immature, and mean. Nor had I ever brought my boyfriend and flaunted him in front of Tom. He knew that I had issues in my relationship, AND HE WAS THE ONE that had decided to so aggressively pursue me. I should say here, he should have known what he was “walking into”. He hit on me KNOWING that I had a boyfriend, etc. Of course, you will argue (and you will be right to do so) that he received a positive response from me to his flirtatious behavior, which obviously encouraged him even more. Also, I am all about loving someone despite their character flaws, but I think there is a difference between displaying mean, sadistic traits vs. other negative character flaws (which Adam has, for instance-Adam doesn’t have a shred of meanness in him, which is one of the reasons why it’s hard for me to let him go even though I know he’s not the right partner for me). On the other hand, I feel completely in love with Tom even though I am not sure if I love him (do you think that is possible? I am curious as to your opinion on this). However, (and now I’m referring to your post of #1522) perhaps I do have some UNCONSCIOUS, as you write, feelings of stinging him which come from my own fears of self-protection (which again, have to do w/what I see in him—your word of mirroring). You know, this time around (round 2, after we had “made up” of sorts—if, I ever see him again, since as I wrote yesterday I have not heard from him in 10 days) I had always said to myself, perhaps if I work on being the best I can be, to treat him well, without pressure, manipulation etc., perhaps he can reciprocate…well this relates to what you wrote about the TRUE INTENTIONS—hence if I can work on and on show him the most honest, non manipulative side of me, perhaps he can transform and display these qualities too (because he is definitely UNEVOLVED, as you say—that’s for sure). However, I’m very much afraid that I will work on and achieve and display all these “nice and honest”- type qualities, and he will take advantage of me. I’m very scared of that—that he won’t stop the ego-based games. I’m not so sure if he is capable of the Scorpio change and transformation…however, I have to say that there is a lot more to him than meets the eye (I forgot to mention that he is extremely secretive!)—and there are lots of layers below the surface…I’m just not so sure if these layers are sadistic (which is what he had exclaimed to me in the car two weeks ago when he said that I bring out something very sick and twisted in him.)
Today I’ve been feeling particularly sad as it has been 2 weeks since I last saw him and I just miss him. He never called me to say how I was when I had acute pharyngitis, and I plan to call him tomorrow and ask him to meet. I’m very disappointed that he didn’t even send a text to see how I was feeling. Again, I feel like I’ll be “groveling” for his attention—who knows if there is a future for us.
I’m glad that the forum has helped you discover aspects of yourself that you didn’t realize and you have been able to work on them. I still am reviewing the posts of 1501/1502 as I still have some areas that I don’t really comprehend yet, and some other posts by Pluto Puppy that are related.
I am interested in your comment that said that my scenario was the classic scenario between Pisces Woman and Scorpio Man…if you have the time, could you explain in a few points what elements in my story fit this “classic” scenario of sorts…I am quite curious.
Thanks again,
Little Fish who is still (unfortunately! ) Scorpioobsessed…
Hi S.O.,
I honestly don’t know how to this put into word… I am not an expert in this aspect (relationship based on sex) but I will try…sigh…
I feel that if you would see sex as a sacred and divine union that would make a huge difference in your relationship.
How much do you know about the man? Do you know his passion? Are you able to feel him and understand his higher purpose in life? That is why I asked you “Do you love him?” you have to tune in with the man you love. But looks like you have just lowered him into a wonderful sex partner like a drug… you feel high when he is around and you feel down when he go MIA. You have to understand that behind that drug is a MAN and behind that sexual indulgent fish is WOMAN. You have to get to know him and at the same time get to know you….
……(I know he’s not the right partner for me). On the other hand, I feel completely in love with Tom even though I am not sure if I love him…..
You have to understand and FEEL what love is…… That comment shows that you are confused and you have yet to explore what TRUE LOVE is… can you this?
I don’t know if it is just me but I never walk away from a relationship unless I have given my best shot. It doesn’t matter if the relationship fails or succeeds as long as I know within me that I have done the best that I could. If at all my own instinct says that I have to walk away and have to move on… I will fly with a smile and love in my heart.
So.. what if my eagle’s feathers are not so shiny anymore… hmmm not a very handsome eagle…. what if he is not actually an eagle… what if he is that Scorpio crawling in the dark… should I just walk away and find another eagle? Oh where is eagle number 2? Can I only love an eagle when he is shiny and handsome and great??
See the picture?? What if Tom is not good in bed anymore?
What if that side of him which you’ve labeled as “sadistic” is a part of him that he doesn’t like and it has to be understood? Don’t you feel that he is still wounded up from his ex girlfriend? Don’t you feel that he needs your light to help him? But how can you help him when you don’t know even know who you are? You have to battle your own darkness in order to battle his…. See.. it goes back to YOU….
Love,
Mari
Loving a Scorpio is not easy…. Loving an eagle is even harder when you are weak in Love…..
They need a very solid runway to land…. solid in LOVE….
Hi Little Fishy,
OK!! So you want to carry on SHOWING’ us how good a girl you really are…. You are hell bent on PROVING your righteousness and his ‘meanie’ side, you are ARGUING to defend your goodness. What are you looking for from the people on this forum? What is it? Validation of your opinion of YOU as the ‘right’ one and validation of your ‘opinion’ of HIM as the ‘meanie’? Here is your validation certificate. Take it to your guy, show it to him and see if he ‘agrees’ with you and will contact you again…
Or… are you trying to REALLY understand what your relationship is and isn’t… Listen, you so remind me of me when I rolled in here…
I am not going to answer any specific ‘points’ in your post until you stop thinking in terms of ‘right and wrong’ and start RELATING to what is being said here. Meaning really take in EVERY meaning and EVERY feeling of every sentence. And check it against your HEART, not your head. I know you have a heart, you are not letting it talk to you.
Here… You know how difficult psychology texts can be and how you have to read it again and again, to break through the words to their REAL meaning? In order to SEE and FEEL every sentence for that meaning? Apply this technique to things being said on here. Read every sentence as if you wrote it yourself… See if it helps.
My best
“I’m very much afraid that I will work on and achieve and display all these “nice and honest”- type qualities, and he will take advantage of me.”
He already knows about your good qualities, this is what attracted him to you in the first place. But Scorpio men go BELOW the surface, to see if you also have NOT such nice qualities, the DARK side to you… he will search for it until it is discovered. And he already is dicovering those in you, hence his withdrawal. Those dark UNKNOWNS to your character are potentially THREATENING to any future you two might have. he wants to know. The point is – do YOU know what your dark side is?
NOBODY can take advantage of you. This ‘victim’ frame of mind you have comes from you not understanding and LOVING yourself. BEFORE you love a man… Remember – the abuser and the abused.
Hi S.O.
Sorry that it has taken me a long time to post.
First of all, I also want to clarify that I feel that you have been “blessed” with a great scorpio guy, who has been honest with you and passionate. So beautiful to have heard your honesty and of course, his. And that deserves my support and sizzling scorpionic protection vibes.
Your scorpio guy is “alright”…thumbs up and wow! So, look after him. He is to be treasured and loved.
I also am grateful for your honesty and freshness and beauty as well.
So…where to try to explain how I feel about your relationship and perhaps offer you a completely different perspective of sex.
I welcome scorpionic men to offer their opinions too…lol. Because this kitty is NOT a GUY!!! She is just stepping a bit out of her fur and numerous shells and layers in order to share.
First of all, Tom Scorp is actually sharing with you, his pathway and life experiences. His passion for you, which actually brings out something dark in him. That darkness, is something to be very respected. So, stop right there, and begin to feel this darkness, with the best intentions to heal it. Meaning, get to know it, feel it, love it, and understand it. It is tangible, potent, beautiful, passionate…
But don´t succumb to it. That is a big no no, when dealing with these energies. Here is where you have to learn to detach yourself from your drug. Which in fact, are you own weaknesses. Therefore, at this point, you must begin to feel your strengths. You are not obsessed with Tom Scorp…you are falling in your own weakness, when confronted with dark, energy.
The truth is, you perverted it. The reason why you did that, is because you did not perceive it under the light of GOD or your own divine energies. That would have permitted you to DETACH from it. So…this is the moment you “FELL out of LOVE” with him. You abondoned him, left him to dry…you no longer see the man….and are no longer interested in him. This is a harsh truth perhaps for you to face, but it is a truth that many women do not understand either, when dealing with these scorpionic forces.
You permitted ILLUSION to enter your relationship. You brought it under your own energies. This is the scorpionic fork in the road “sexual choice”…and why perhaps most scopionic men will leave their women, if they see that she did not make this choice, in some measure or other. They are ACUTELY aware of the cold and HARSH abandonment here…
So, no, you are not obsessed…you are just lost in yourself and the plutonic forces are just letting you feel, who you are and what you have done, based on the choice you made for the relationship.
You only need to begin to “see the man”…and NEVER loose focus of that.
Again, how he makes you feel, is not you being in LOVE with him.
You being in love with him, is how you make HIM feel.
So, make him feel different…and you will no longer be obsessed. Due to these strong energies, he will be a grumpy guy. LoL!
But, his love making should change and evolve…and that will be your “unspoken” indication that you are loving him back.
Don´t do it by talking to him…find other more creative ways to soften his fierce mars energy.
“So, make him feel different…”
Remember you are not doing it to ‘obtain’ something from him, such as HIS loving and understanding. It is not an exchange of ‘I give you a little bit of this, and in return you give me a little bit of that’… You can make him feel different by just BEING loving and sharing your feminine loving energy with him. You cannot withold your love just because he is not ‘living up to your expectations’ of him… You have to be strong within yourself, see where your weaknesses are and not succumb to them.
It is not too hard to understand… Scorpio men HAVE those feminine energies within them, they will respond to love – with love, and to darkness – with darkness (that mirroring). That dark and twisted side to him he mentions – response to YOUR darkness (weaknesses). He himself HAS that dark side (dark energy), but your loving can heal it in him.
Love heals all.
Hi again S.O.
The truth is…(for me, lol) women and men do not truly seek love.
So, at the moment of not having your own divinity, comes the true moment of WHO you REALLY ARE….you will “succumb” to this dark energy, which is actually his soul energy and your uncleared darkness. Through scorpionic mirroring, he gave you what you wanted…and perhaps succumbed to his own lower nature as well. But, he KNOWS that he can get out of it any time…scorpios will transform on their own, if they have to. You won´t believe what it takes to do it, but again, for scorpio, who is not afraid to “go to hell”…it is actually a relief to see their truthes and have them INGRAINED into their souls. Therefore, scorpio will ALWAYS become their TRUTHES.
So…he will deal with it if and when he truly wants to. It is really a question of time and whether they have explored those heaven and hell depths and beyond, in order to transform correctly, plant the right seeds (frame of mind mixed with virtue) and do it right. Most women will see this a “cruel” and begin the insulting.
i.e….show who they REALLY are…lol.
I just call them meanies…but I actually do know what it takes, and it is a harsh purification process not for the faint of heart. I mean, would you “kill” a part of your personality, if you knew it was causing unbalance in a person? Scorpio can and will…it is not even an issue to give up something for them. I really mean this. Most of us, can´t even give up our bad habits. But scorpio will move his world for you, if he is in love.
The reason is because of the merge…once merging with a woman, you become their focus…so, again, they will see it as “US” in the true sense of the word. If something in them, is causing unbalance, they will kill it in themselves. They expect the same from you. Sadly, women don´t understand this concept because they are more separatist. They don´t want “union”…they want control of the guys energy.
The nature of how it got into you in the first place (through sex) is unstable and illusionary. Why? Because of the very nature of our illusions…we always want more, we need to be stimulated, more materialism, consumerism…etc.
Hence, you are “souless”. And he knows it…
So…what did you seek when deciding to make love to him? Your first step was passion. It was not, understanding his overwhelming energies. I mean..you don´t always walk around feeling such passion…that was his doing!!! So, you have to begin to understand FIRST, this overwhelming energy on you. This is very critical…because the first STEP of your relationship with Scorpio, usually determines how it will end.
If you proceeded with the unstable seeds of passion and sex, then, you recieve the fruits of it.
However, if you had fought against it, tried to understand it, and master it, before jumping into bed with him, then you are cultivating the soil for other fruits. The truth is, if you succumb without compassion, understanding, loving yourself and seeking truth, you become the “monster”…
Because of the nature of scorpionic sex, women must seek their own divinity first…if not by bravely facing their energies, then, by yourself.
If you were seeking love with this man, then what are you complaining about? Your intentions will be returned to you 10 fold…or if he is one of those kinds of scorpios that only show you 5% of their intensity, he will return your intentions 95% in terms of feeling and lack of virtue…
This is because of the true nature of masculine and feminine. The feminine is receptive to the masculine. So…he wants you to be VERY receptive to him. Which is nice. His pathway, through his “love bites” (sigh) indicates that he has suffered alot of pain and phoenixed himself out of it, through passion with his “feminine” side. Or, his search for his own divinity or soul manifestation. So, he is probably working with something related to creative or destructive energies. His possessiveness is based on the fact that he is sharing and giving himself to you..and I feel that most women don´t even know what this means…lol. But really, for me, it speaks volumes.
Transformative energies indicated that he seeks to transform you, whether you are ready or not. (darn scorpios!!!) So…actually, he has given a part of himself to you, to work with. Which is actually >>>>> YOURSELF!
He only wants you…if he is actually seeking truth. He knows it is there…but can you even GIVE it?
If you succeed in doing this…i.e. overcoming your obession, which he has kindly shown you YOUR pathway to your own divinity and gifts, you hold the keys to his transformation. He made you feel wonderful, told you where the starting point was…and now it is up to you.
It is that simple.
My respect for him, is based on this perception…and hey, I could be wrong! Perhaps he has not even gone there yet…but I feel that he eventually will.
Hi P.Puppy…
We sure miss you!!! You are very much needed here…so can you write soon?
It is like the forum is missing something very vital and beautiful…
You…
Give him time, dear Gatubela… 13 years away…
Hi S.O.
“This is the scorpionic fork in the road “sexual choice”…
Dark energies will be perceived as “negative” if you are unable to feel your own soul.
As I have mentioned before, women are the guardians of the energy in the relationship. The energy that you store, WILL be manifested. Scorpionic energies will ALWAYS bring up WHAT is REAL…
So, they will see “ANOTHER WORLD”…based on their capacity to detach. Again, even if unevolved, he can actually detach at any time…through honesty, or some kind of virtue.
His comment that you are a “whore” (hahaha!) is an example of this. I mean, he seems to like that part of you, so maybe you are “his whore” and actually, he kind of likes that in you… (sigh….) Scorpio requires a woman to be open as well…so he could be in conflict with his own energies and choices as well)
His comment that you like pain, is actually a reflection of something deeper. I actually feel that this feeling goes to the CORE of who he is…perhaps related to mars energy. The truth is, scorpio always has to “go to hell” in order to transform and become a phoenix, if not in touch with their LOVE energy. Or rather, if their heart chakra is not open. Their ego deaths are painful…
An example of this, is the concept of “hell” and what they feel is submerging themselves into their truthes.
A “monk” or preist will say, “you can be saved and go to heaven.”
Scorpio will say: “I don´t want to go to heaven. There are people suffering in HELL and I just can´t stand to leave them alone. Hell does not bother me so much…I am at ONE with those energies, because I don´t separate Heaven and Hell, like they do. People in HELL, don´t know LOVE. People in Heaven, dont know HELL…
Therefore, we have an eternal separation…
Under dualism…which is polarized love, you are only seeing one half of the spectrum of his love for you…but if you see it with love, you will see that it is only lower expression of a HIGHER energy.
Sadism is your blind perception of a man causing you pain. But dearie…he does not seem to be “the sadist enjoying it.”
His perception that you “like” pain, could be correct…I mean, you are still having sex (without the intent to really love him) with him, right?
So, when women choose passion and sex…AS A DRUG and not as a GIFT from the GUY, (a gift and not an obligation)…which is actually very beautiful in scorpionic men (PLEASE don´t get me wrong here, eagles), you “objectify” the man into a “sex toy”…
Some men may really like this, so what is prevalent in our society is “feeling pleasure” and not “loving the person” and so they want to be “played” with too! Sex is actually very powerful, right? Do you do it to recieve pleasure, or do you do it, because he makes you feel the divine?
I mean, just what the heck were the two of you doing for 7 hours at a time…? If he did not get you believing in GOD by now, by loving the “hell” out of you…then are you surprised about what he is saying?
.
Dear Gatebula,
Thank you so, SO much for your insightful and deep posts today. I am currently digesting everything and will respond shortly to your posts. Inessology, thanks also to your comments of today and will reply to me as well.
Best,
Scorpiooobsessed
So, the idea is the following….
If you can make him feel “love”, then you truly know that you are IN the STATE of LOVE, with him. Your present state, is the starting point…
And if he can make you feel “love”, then you know that he is IN the STATE of LOVE with you. And his present state, is the starting point.
So, yeah..it is going to be painful. It is not a “you have to make me feel good” situation.
You have to find love within yourself first…and that is going to be a bummer. You have to deal with your addiction thingy…and then your anger and rage thingy…and then there is the “robot gemini back-up guy” thingy…
He will have to deal with “what the feminine / divine has meant to him ” thingy. Most likely, GOD has been pushed on him like a needle going up his ass…does not trust anything feminine, because he sees the rampant illusion going on in our society…and he probably has “seen” the divine or truth through his own harsh life experiences, which are usually painful and deathly.
There is a certain compatibility between the two of you, not based on some sort of psychological problem or mental disorder, but based on life experiences and potential ego pathways to find GOD.
So…maybe you have also had tough experiences too…? If you have not shared with us, what they have been, perhaps you need to see them in yourself, and how they have influenced you.
Anyways, the feeling of love, is a feeling that will FEEL BEYOND the two of you, as each of you SURRENDER to your love energies.
So again, in LOVE, there is no right and wrong…there is only the “true intention” of wanting to find love between two people and saying no to those “toxic” energies, that are in fact, the current truthes in our society.
Language is truly a limitting and destructive factor here…lol…
What would you be feeling, if you did not have the option of knowing that the word and concept of SADIST existed? What if it was not “in your vocabulary?” It is like the classification satisfied your desire to understand more about yourself and him.
You would just be feeling pain, at a guy, who is reacting…to your reacting…to his reacting…etc…
We would perceive our “ego loops” so much better if certain words did not limit our desire to understand our true selves.
Dear Gatubela and Inessology,
I just wanted to say a BIG thank you again for spending your valuable time to analyze and reflect on my issue/problem. It means A LOT that people I have not met are trying to aid me in my understanding of my Scorpio man and of myself. I really need to think deeply about all the issues you brought up today and will respond to your posts tomorrow.
Best,
Little Fish who is Scorpioobsessed
It’s OK, Little Fishy, take all the time you need, these are all profound issues… not so easy to grasp when we are conditioned to respond to surface manifestation. Please try not to just think, but FEEL. Feel what is behind words. Call on your Piscean intuitive self.
My best
SURRENDER….
It is so damn simple… All a male Scorpio wants is for a woman to surrender to the ancient feminine energy of love that she carries within… And why? In one word – TRUST… it ensures absence of ego based games, meaningless fights of who has an ‘upper hand’… it ensures unwavering HONESTY and LOYALTY. He doesn’t trust easily – an emotional investment for him is far greater than a woman can comprehend.
So… when we talk about ‘surrender to who you are’ – for a woman it really means ‘Surrender to Love’. But before you do that – understand what love truly means in Scorpionic terms.
The problem is… an average male has NO CLUE what LOVE means… and women, through their experiences with men are TAUGHT what their men’ expectations are of ‘love’ = a comforting and stable possession of a pussy, without actually trying to understand who she is and why she is with him. Women fall into that trap so easily… they do not have the necessary strength and UNDERSTANDING of themselves to break away from it… yet, ask a woman, ANY woman out there (lesbians excluded) if she wants an eternal true love with ONE male, forever – and the answer will be ‘Yes’. Women DREAM of it and never get it and – settle for less.
I blame men.
Which is a pity… because to me men are magnificent creatures if they could only understand their TRUE duty and responsibility to this world. The sheer power of male desire is utterly FACINATING and mystical… I guess as a woman I will never truly understand it.
In fact, my SECOND conscious memory of the world is that of a man. Some unknown to me guy, stripped down to waist and washing his torso under the water running from a street water tap… I remember the movement of his muscles and the colour of his skin… I watched him in awe… I was four at the time. This is a memory very intimate to me, and I still don’t know why it left such an inprint…
Dear Gatubela,
I am still trying to process and understand your comments from yesterday and today or tomorrow I will be responding. You gave me a lot to think about and I have to say that I’m a bit confused as to some issues so I need some time to reflect on them.
LoveMari and Inessology, your comments were very helpful as well and will respond to you shortly as well.
Thank you,
Little Fish who is Scorpioobsessed
Little Fish, Gatubela,
First of all, I want to pay homage to you Gatubela, for putting together of picture of clarity a lot of the scorpic energy out there have felt, but failed to put into words to communicated to others, it takes purity and divinity to be able see these pictures, let alone communicate them, most of us function inside the frigs of the whole picture and get caught up in frustrating over the chapters, and fail to tell the story.
Little Fish, to speak on behalf the scorpic energy in side of me… and in the name of self honesty and up frontness… my advise is “Tom the Scorpio” has “moved on” in the eccentric sense of “falling out of love”, so concentrating building yourself, finding ways to get in touch with that sleeping soul and your own light and dark energy… it’s the only way out, to freedom… which, unfortunately, cannot be given, or shared… it has to be earned through blood and pain.
I won’t repeat what has already been beautifully put together by Gatubela, what I have managed to say in the past has been nothing but “I just don’t feel loved”, raw, primitive, and confusing. So Little Fish, ask the question why is it after all said and done, you would WANT someone whom could very possibly be the wrong man for the rest of your eternity? and that your biggest fear is not to commit your life and emotions to a “wrong man”, but rather, the fear of not having him at all?… after all, you see yourself as a selective and reserved human being. If in this simple honesty, may be face the brutal truth… that you might be the “wrong woman” for him… by the instinctive and simple truth no amount of words could explain… that he has “fall out of love”. I don’t need to be him, I can tell you this not by my assumption and self-interest, I tell you this by asking you to trust your deep instinct, that yes, a “man”, or anyone in love, would make the effort, fight through their own demons to be with you, in effort, in time, in… everything.
And when he/she is no longer in love… then if no honesty is offered you with words, trust what you sense, what you feel.
I applaud you for your clarity to put in words this simple fact, that you have to feel “in love”, to even begin anything in a relationship(intimate love) dynamic… I speak through my masculine energy here, and to speak via the feminine language of “fear”, yes, the “fear” energy is the energy of separation, i.e. pushing away, disappearing, disengage… the road block to “feel”… it means true feeling itself is incapable of discriminating based on thoughts. meaning, you are incapable of not feel loved when you are actually “loved”… of course, this is to speak on the ground of one is in touch with their self-honesty and emotions. that deep core place of instincts, and deep sense of right and wrong, truth and lie… to yourself. You can lie to anyone you want, but ask for one reason as to why you would WANT to lie to yourself… in all honesty, I don’t think anyone could believe in one that exist. Love yourself begins here, and only can begin here.
The ability and willingness of “falling in love”, now this is a different matter, I sense people deal with it in variety of ways, but in the end, the shortest distance to love is no distance, meaning you are in touch with your true feelings at any given moment. but the reality for the majority of beings is, you have to work and bleed to be able to cross the distance or social conditioning to go back to that place of zero separation, where you were actually born. It’s not an easy feat, I have deep respect for anyone who is even willing to walk on that path, let alone walked that path. In all honesty… words and understanding are weak in moving body parts… it won’t change the physical world… and that distance has to be crossed in the physical sense… if I were to give example, lets say a person is fully aware that body shapes do not play an material role in true self confidence, yet in his or her own belief and acceptance of social condition, that person won’t feel “confident” unless he/she has actually take actions and see the hard work resulted in the physical change of appearance… in the case of the fear of survival, a person who has in the past depended on others for their food and shelter is incapable of feeling courage unless he/she has taken charge and start to survive on their own… it’s a start of a journey… that the complexity of human nature in compliance with the universal energy should work to simplify life, to find focus in chaos, and to begin the system of self-growth… one step at a time, or better yet, whatever way works for you.
This is the part of finding-self… find it, it is where everything real and sustainable begins… trust that deep sense of instincts, right or wrong, truth or lie… it would guide you to your individuality, creativity, and imagination… everything is so uniquely … you.
Enjoy the blue, wide sky and freedom.
Dear JoJo,
I followed your journey here on the forum, parts of it resonated with me and were really touching. I hope you are in a better place now, the strong and unique woman as you are.
“it’s a start of a journey… that the complexity of human nature in compliance with the universal energy should work to simplify life”
For me these are the starting and ending points now: LOVE, SIMPLICITY, EXPERIENCE.
Hugs.
Dear Gatubela (and LoveMari),
I will respond to your 4 posts (and to the 2 by LoveMari as I feel like they cover much of the same concepts as yours) now—as I wrote before I wanted to take a bit of time to mull everything over. First, Thank you for appreciating my honesty. In turn, I really really appreciate the time you have all taken to try and help me with my issue. The first observation that I have is that I feel like I understood a lot of the concepts that you, Inessology and LoveMari talked about, but it is still unclear in my head how exactly to go about knowing myself better and loving myself (so that in turn I can be able to help my Scorpio).
First, Gatubela your first suggestion was to stop and feel and try to understand his darkness. Can I ask a stupid question and say how am I supposed to “try to understand it”—do you mean, to try and ask him questions about his past, or his feelings, to try and probe at elements of his character in order to be able to comprehend this dark part of himself? OR do you mean I’m supposed to sense it and try to discern, from his behavior towards me certain elements of it? Sorry if this is a stupid question.
Second, when you say DON’T succumb to the darkness, do you mean that I should stop sexual relations with him (if I ever see him again!)? Are you suggesting that I try and get to know him on an emotional/spiritual level without hopping in bed with him? So are you implying that the scorpionic fork in the road means waiting to have sexual relations before getting to know the person (and maybe loving them first?)? Or am I getting it wrong.
Third, and I think your last few sentences are particularly meaningful: “Again, how he makes you feel, is not you being in LOVE with him. You being in love with him, is how you make HIM feel. So, make him feel different…and you will no longer be obsessed. Due to these strong energies, he will be a grumpy guy. LoL! But, his love making should change and evolve…and that will be your “unspoken” indication that you are loving him back. Don´t do it by talking to him…find other more creative ways to soften his fierce mars energy.” What do you mean when you say, make him feel different (sorry again if this sounds stupid!)? Do you mean, that I should try and understand what makes him special and show him that I have this understanding of his character, and that I value it? And that I should try to communicate that to him in some way? Inessology, thanks for your clarifying comment here—you helped me understand the concept of mirroring better.
Fourth, Gatubela your analysis of the Scorpionic truths, mirroring and and transformation was quite informative. Here, I have to clarify about the sex to answer your question as to what I sought when deciding to sleep with him…yes, you are absolutely right, it was passion. I had never in my life felt such passion for a man, and never also in my life felt that such a man wanted me so “badly” and had pursued me for so long…it was extremely flattering for me. If you consider that the men I have slept with in my life can be counted on the fingers of only one hand, while in the past I felt it was an “investment” to sleep with someone, with Tom the Scorpio I felt like it was the natural choice—even though it was unspoken between us for the longest time. Also, the fact that there was a buildup of sorts of almost 11 months between us made it “even more urgent” for me to succumb to this energy, as you refer to it, as I felt like I couldn’t take it anymore (and he was the first to voice this). Now, and again I am just trying to understand, are you saying that I should have waited and considered tempering this energy? To be completely honest, I don’t think I would have had the strength to do that—in the sense that I wanted to explore it…and the sexual side of me which for the most part, I have left unexplored in my life…do you think this was a very bad choice? Obviously the “damage” (if I should view it that way now?) is done in that I succumbed to it, but for the future, if I see him again, should I try to keep the “interaction” between us at a less physical level? I will analyze the latest status of my situation at the end—there is a slight chance that I will see my Scorpio tomorrow.
Fifth, that is a very interesting point regarding the love bites—it is something very strange which he does with such intensity that it shocks me. Perhaps, he is still wounded from his prior relationship with the older woman…I’m not sure. In any case I will try to figure this out if and when I see him. As for his possessiveness (and his jealousy fits!) I agree with you that he is sharing and giving himself to me…but please clarify for me, do you mean that the possessiveness is related to the transformation energy and that he seeks to transform me, as you say, whether or not I am ready?
Sixth, your description of the heaven/hell scenario is very interesting and something I had never considered before. Regarding the whore comment, a few times he has mentioned that I am HIS whore (this has been in the bedroom), and so you are absolutely right in guessing that. However, the reason I mentioned the whore comment is because when he yelled it out the last time, (that I was the biggest whore he met in his life) it was when we were in the car (obviously it wasn’t sexual) and I felt (although I could be wrong), that it could be interpreted to mean that I have such a hold on him (psychologically) and that he is trying to get rid of his own feelings for me (as he has issues w/ control as I said) and the fact that they are overwhelming. But yes, he has said that he loves the fact that I’m such a “good girl” and saintly in real life he said but in bed with him I am whorelike, that it drives him wild…are you saying that this is a bad thing? As you say, he really likes that in me…but should I stop exploring this side of myself with him? What is your opinion on this?
Seven, regarding his comment about pain…yes I feel like that refers to something deeper as well. I feel he has a very dark side to him and not just because he has now managed to express it verbally to me but also from the past…and related to this, the sadism thing, he did say once how it drove him wild to hear me scream in pain and that he would want me hurting…but at the same time, your observation is correct that other times “he does not seem to be the sadism enjoying it…”…so I am very confused as to this…I know you will say that I need to understand, and I am trying to do this over the next few days, why I often like to explore this side of me—if you asked me whether I like pain, my answer would be yes and no…now this is for sure disturbing, and yes it’s my dark side which I need to understand and try to detach/get rid of if I can? Is this concept correct? Or do I need to accept it as part of me?
Eight—and this I have to say is the one concrete thing that I managed to “realize” and come to terms with the past day and a half (Inessology, I think you’ll be proud of me here as it has to do with your comment of yesterday how I am thinking that I have done everything correctly and he has done everything badly)…you are absolutely right that my behavior has encouraged him to be viewed as a sex toy. I never thought it to be true, but when I analyzed my behavior, the things he said, and zoomed out of the scenario, I was shocked to realize that I had debased him to exactly that (however unwillingly so). I remember, that he asked me, back in October when I told him I’d broken up with my boyfriend, whether I had told Adam that there is another guy involved. And I responded, are you crazy? I would never want to hurt him like that. And I thought to myself then, this guy is a megalomaniac, as he doesn’t care if it means hurting Adam, but he would want me to tell Adam about him (Tom)? What would be the purpose of that I thought since we were not boyfriend and girlfriend? Also, another time he mentioned that his ex (the 7 years older than him woman) was also “sexually deprived”. And I asked him, is that what you think of me, do you think that I’m using you as sex replacement in my relationship with Adam? And he didn’t respond which makes me now think, he was considering this thought. As for what we do for our 6-7 hour sessions, again, this is something completely new to me. We are completely in sync with each other in this—and I know he feels it too. For me, it is the whole experience—I feel that there are very strong emotions that drive the sex to be as powerful as it is. When I am in his arms and we are just cuddling and talking is something I value just as much. He has remarked (however this is more in the prior sessions) that one of the things he adored was that afterwards we could be in each others arms and talk so comfortably, and so frankly. But again, just to be more specific, when you say does he make me feel the divine what do you mean—that there is some sort of higher, greater connection that bonds the two of us? Or that because there is such a bond between us, this in turn leads me to believe in the divine and in God? Sorry again if this sounds foolish—I just want to be clear on what you mean.
Nine, now onto the steps I have to take. For me the hardest thing is to see if I can love him (I’m pretty sure I can, although obviously it will take some time to develop) with the risk that I will get nothing back…and this goes back to what you, LoveMari and Inessology are saying that it is not about getting something but about giving. Because of my own insecurities, and because in the past I felt that I had loved all of my boyfriends but except for Adam (and THIS IS THE MAJOR REASON WHY IT’S SO HARD FOR ME TO LET GO OF HIM) but NONE of the boyfriends had loved me back in return, it was DEVASTATING to me that the partner I had loved just cut me out of their lives), this is VERY difficult for me…it’s almost like it’s a huge RISK. As you say, it’s going to be a “bummer”. Finding love within myself…how on earth do I do that?! I know that there’s no procedures or rules for this, but would you say that what this essentially entails is to understand my prior choices, accept them, and try to improve the decisions I would make in the future? As well as trying to accept (or get rid of?) the dark parts of myself? Which also have to do with my weaknesses and insecurities (neediness, attachment, etc.)?
As for him, you SO right that he probably doesn’t trust anything feminine, you know he made a comment once, when I told him that my mum had figured out that we were sleeping together, he said, “a woman would figure it out, it is typical, they’ve all behaved in this shady way in the past”. Also, your sadist/ego loop is something I had never considered, and it requires further thought on my part…am not sure what I would answer here.
Ten, and lastly, when you say there is a certain compatibility between the two of us, yes I’ve had tough experiences too, which are related to what I mentioned regarding love and my ex-boyfriends (EXCLUDING Adam)…I unfortunately dealt with this by trying to have as few experiences as possible, by not being open with men (shocking for someone like me who has tons of close friends and acquaintances).
I know I have written a lot again but finally, I wanted to give you a quick update on my situation. I contacted my Scorpio today and he was nice to me on the phone (albeit a short phone call) and I asked him if we can meet tomorrow, and he said he’ll try very hard to do so as he wants to see me as well, but it will depend on his work schedule (lately he has been working 13-14 hours a day and this is corroborated by another friend who works with him). I was thinking that when I next see him, tomorrow or perhaps over the weekend if tomorrow doesn’t happen, to tell him that I’m in the breakup stages with Adam (which is the truth as Adam and I are having a conversation tomorrow as well to most likely end things). I was thinking that if I am strong enough to break up and then I manage to see the Scorpio to tell him I indeed broke up and then perhaps seeing if he reacts at all different over the next few weeks now that he will know that I am available and not using him as sex toy—this combined with all of the soul-searching, love-finding, trying to get to know myself and my weaknesses, etc. all the stuff described above.
Thanks for your patience in reading this post and sorry if my questions seem silly; perhaps to you these concepts are obvious but I still have a lot of unanswered questions and really want to try and do my best. Inessology, I will respond to your posts tomorrow (as your contributions are much appreciated as well!!) as it is really late here and I need to get to sleep! I basically addressed Gatubela’s posts in one response as there were many issues and I wanted to unify everything in one post on my part for it to be easier to read.
Best,
Little Fish who is now Scorpioconfused! 🙂
Dear Gatubela,
As an addendum to my post of just now, I just wanted to clarify my thoughts when I said that it’s hard for me to be able to detach and love the Scorpio without having the guarantee that he’ll return my love…do you also mean, when you say that I should want the best for him, that I should be okay with him being with another woman?! This freaks me out as I feel like I will be DEVASTATED if that happens and how can I willingly LOVE him when it opens up the possibility that I will be MAJORLY HURT if this love is not returned? Again this takes me back to my prior experiences (which you asked me to share), where I was more innocent and I “filtered” my emotions less—where I invested years in men where I loved them wholeheartedly and they did not—it was hugely hurtful to me. I’m sorry if it sounds selfish but I don’t know if I can be so strong as to be so detached and sure of myself. Also, as I mentioned before, the reason it is so hard for me to give up adam is that I love him and I know he loves me…but as you put it, I have him as “backup” (and that is indeed the truth of the matter) and that is obviously not fair to him…I know I cannot have both men, obviously.
Hi S.O.
Look…I am going to do what you should be doing…not writing so much and start feeling what has to be done.
Stop trying to rationalize “the guy”…if he came with a manual, he would have tied it to his private parts for you to figure out.
Would you have still read it before he kissed you? hahaha!
Ummmm…Tom? According to page 12…you give love bites…Can I have those on “medium” strength, please?”
I can tell you that he is instinctual…and is not listening to his “thoughts”…
Perhaps you need to understand this part of yourself.
So…again, behind that huge post there, was a whole bunch of controlled “nothing.”
You need to feel your own energies……and end it with Adam. You are hurting him by your lies and dishonesty. And that means that you are a coward with Tom. Which he already knows…
Just start seeing yourself as being looked on…from above. Meaning, Tom has a view of looking at all your moves “perched” on something higher than you are able to understand. He knows where your movements are going to…and where they are coming from…
So…after the whole essay you wrote, I still have no friggin´ idea how you FEEL. Conversations are not FEELINGS…they are just EVENTS in a relationship, which usually HIDE deeper feelings and fears. Unless you are conversing about something REAL.
FEELINGS are actually unable to be talked about per se, unless you know yourself pretty darn well. If you don´t, THAT darkness is FELT by his own scorpionic energies.
So, I am feeling a lot of fear, cowardness, immaturity, manipulation, petulance, and actually, the list goes on…in your post.
Can you face your own weaknesses, honestly and bravely? There is nothing wrong with having them…as long as you are working on improving yourself, energetically, towards love.
So…you have to understand, that being a coward, is literally what he is seeing. He won´t powder puff that in rational excuse, based on his overwhelming desire to have you. I mean, come on, look at it from his side.
Once you made love to him, that was your “committment”…and now he knows you will cheat on him.
Those are things he sees, S.O. He won´t listen to anything you say. Your energy has to change…through feeling it and becoming it.
He will listen to that, as it “tangoes” with his instinctual core.
Little Fish,
You don’t have “two men”, you have one robot, and if you keep doing what you are doing, you would have no robot left. Good luck in “seeking” truth with lies.
Dear Lovemari,
I am responding to your post of 1524-1525 now. You make some very good points. I never wanted to have him as solely as sex partner. I remind you that we were friends beforehand—for about 7 months we spoke for approximately an hour per day—and this was one of the first thing that I loved about our relationship—that I felt really comfortable with him and that we understood each other. Oftentimes we read each others minds. However, after he began to “diss” me (BEFORE we slept together), he also greatly reduced the hours we spoke (I refer you back to my original post). Which had greatly saddened me and had told him. One of the reasons I “jumped into bed” with him is because I had felt that I knew him pretty well…however I have realized that one of the things I miss most about our relationship is the friendship we had. I hope that after I break up with Adam The Scorpio and I can redevelop some of this friendship. I also absolutely agree with you—I never walked away from relationships unless I felt that I had tried and tried my best. Which is another reason why I never invested in many different relationships because I gave it my all in the few that I chose to invest in. I get what you are saying about the darkness and battles and helping him…which is similar to Gatubela’s posts as well…and am currently working on this.
Thanks again,
Scorpioobsessed
Dear Inessology,
I refer to your post of 1526, although I already responded in part yesterday in my longer post to Gatebula…I have to say you are right…this forum has aided me, in just a few days, to pinpoint a lot of things that I did which I really needed to reconsider…I mostly did think I did everything right as you say, however I have realized that I unwillingly also used the situation partly to serve my own interests…I’m sure now that that is one of the reason why it got so distorted (as you say it will always take two to tango). As for your second post in 1526, it makes sense to me and am trying to battle my darkness (weaknesses)..I have figured out one part of it but I need to think hard and take actions to battle the entire picture of it. Your post of 1528 further clarifies this, and you helped me understand the path…In 1535, you write “he doesn’t trust easy”—this is the statement of the year I think…
Thanks again,
Scorpioobssessed
Dear Gatubela,
Just a brief (!) response to your post of 1540. Hahaha, it seems my Virgo rising took over with all the analysis and details and questions I had…LOL!!! Anyway yes I plan to end it with Adam when I see him over the next few days…I cannot take this situation any longer…it is unhealthy for me and him (although he has his own issues in that he doesn’t want to let me go and is in denial). Even though I know this I don’t know why it has been SO hard for me to put it in action…in any case it has to be done…I have to spend some quiet time really reflecting on this and sorting out my feelings. You are right, I am being cowardly, and by not making a decision reflects this weakness as well. However, I need to refer to what you wrote about the cheating because you are mistaken on this–just because I cheated on Adam, does NOT mean I will cheat again on Tom. Not all situations are the same–and just because one person took one road once–does not mean that they will repeat this mistake again in the future. I strongly believe this and know it to be true.
Thanks,
Scorpioobsessed
Hi S.O.
“Not all situations are the same–and just because one person took one road once–does not mean that they will repeat this mistake again in the future. I strongly believe this and know it to be true.”
Sure, convince us of that, with your actions instead of your words.
Again, you are not understanding that he won´t care about what you “said”…He will discard you on what you DID. And it will be final by the way because of your powder puff, put a cherry on top of it…DENYING his powerful presence, minimizing his masculinity and WHO he is a man and the effect of his MANLINESS on you.
Again…you “negate” him with every word you write…
You FAIL to see that he will perceive that if you did it by converting his energy to a “drug”…you will do it on VARIOUS levels of your being. So when the going gets “tough”, you are a rational escapist.
I am not trying to defend him, I am just telling you, that he DID what he FELT. That is his perspective…that is how he sees things at the moment. Can you get in touch with that RAW energy of his…???
Do what you FEEL….Do what you FEEL….Do what you FEEL….hmmmm….
“I cannot take this situation any longer..”
This sentence is really the only thing worth exploring, in all of your posts, for me.
You should be HONEST with yourself, in terms of any doubts you may actually be having about Tom and Adam…
Maybe, Adam is the guy for you?
But your confusion again, is based on the fact that you are NOT choosing LOVE as a way to handle yourself. You
I honestly don´t care if you think I am right or wrong…as that has nothing to do with your relationship. Just FEEL yourself now…and understand that your current way of “Thinking” is what got you into trouble in the first place…which means it is time for a change.
Can you do me a favor? Respond to my post with only 5 sentences, with the first things that come to your mind…
Can you be that honest with yourself?
Dear Gatubela,
5 Sentences:
I am at a standstill…and yes I cannot take the situation any longer.
It is as if I am not living 100% the way things are right now.
I love Adam, but I do not think unfortunately that he is the person for me…I feel that he does not fully understand me, and there is a huge distance between us…we are not on the same wavelength.
I’m in love with Tom, there is something unspoken between us that feels right.
Hi S.O.,
I am not completely understanding you.. It feels as if I am only reading words, when I know that there is a whole bunch of feelings under them.
What does a standstill feel like? Does it make you feel a bit nervous?
Hi again S.O.
And of course…you have to understand that you being in love with him is how you make him feel…
So, if you want to know if you are “in the state” of love with him, you will have to ask him how he feels about you. Does he feel loved? It is not related to “it is more than just sex, baby, although it is the best sex evarrrr!…”
He is not it seems…(yet?) because of his polar, dualistic actions of hot and cold, as Love would have crushed out the duality within himself.
He is not at peace with himself as indicated by your comments. So, under all the passion, is an unhappy scorpio…
And under all of that passion that you feel and have felt, you are not “happy and at peace” with yourself either. I mean, I don´t see any indication that you love yourself, through seeking self knowledge.
You are also unable to balance. Balancing having him and not having him…being with him and not being with him…work and play…passion and practicality…love and war….sex and love…
You do not perceive these differences at every moment of your relating with him.
As a result of this, you turned ingrateful, selfish, demanding, angry, revengeful, feeling rage, feeling uncontrolled, you became a liar, you became a cheater, you objectified a person, you left yourself..as you chose to not love,…and the list goes on… because being ingrateful, is being arrogant…becoming selfish, means your ego predominates…being a liar, means you deny truth or reject it when faced with it…objectifying a person means that you are “inhuman” yourself…etc…
So, welcome to your darkness…and what scorpio REALLY sees.
You CAN´T ignore these things about yourself, and then say “I am IN LOVE” with Tom. You have to DEAL with the BIGGER issue first, S.O….gently and with love.
An example of not being dualistic is loving him with no expectations at all. I know it is not easy…but again, you can see that you have alot to learn about yourself and your own darkness…
Don´t you feel that this should be a priority?
Dear Gatubela,
Thanks for your post. Can I ask a question? Why do you believe that love will crush out the duality within himself, as you wrote? Don’t you think that sometimes, (perhaps based on your experiences?), it just unfortunately doesn’t work that way? I’ve seen couples who do love each other but behave in a strange fashion that is inconsistent, perhaps due to other issues they may have..
You are right, I am not very good at balancing. I feel pulled in two extremes. And yes, no, I am not happy with myself. Sometimes I feel I know myself pretty well. Other times however, I feel very unsure and I end up maintaining the current status quo as it entails avoiding making a decision on my part. You have probably guessed that I’m slightly avoidant. I just feel lost…
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
Little Fish,
Again, in the name of honesty and up frontness, there will be no “Tom” lining up either as a partner, or as a “friend”. I know because I have gone through my own delusion of “friendship”, I’ve learned that in that delusion there is no self-honesty, I mean, what do you expect from that “friendship”? attention as you have received/shared before? support? priority? ask yourself, what friend who lives thousands miles away who is not a love interest you have contacted for the past two weeks? as life truly is that between friends, you don’t make plans to be “together”, you live your separate and respected lives. and what did you say to each other beyond the “chat”? are you willing to stand by watching him fall in love? spare attention to you as you spare you attention to your “friends”? So you see the delusion of this concept, and understand via his own self honesty and respect to you, the scorpic energy is truly all or nothing. So in reality what you do with your robot is non of his concern now… and to find that zero separation of that instinctive core, one has to strip naked of his/her desire, want, need, survival, obligation, responsibilities, kindness, ego, need to prove something … strip naked in front of the mirror and ask who is this choice made for? and why, the bare naked motivations of why you do the things you do… only through doing this, you really look at who you are, know who you are, and feel responsible for your own creation that is your own life.
I wish to share with you some of my own journey of self discovery, it’s indeed scorpic, and share some insight as to what “Tom” had felt in some of the comment that I feel is truly confusing and “hurtful” to you. I want to start with the concept of “obsession”, for the longest time, I have felt my energy via the virtue of “femininity”, and was quite confused but none the less blindly followed my own intuition. then somewhere down the line, may be through the stronger intuition coming from the male scorpios, the understanding of my own masculine energy came into my own awareness, and I started to make sense of what I felt… the scorpic obsessiveness, or fixation on another being, as Bella has very intuitively put as “a means to begin” a journey of relating, is the scorpic way of attempt merging his own energy to that of a woman, yes, female Scorpios feel this too, but via the nature of the feminine, which is receptive, the female scorpio obsessiveness tends to “wrap” what’s given, “trap” may be a better words, but a masculine scorpic energy seek to penetrate, which means to explore all that’s there to explore of a being that has captured(intrigued) his attention. and this exploration is massive and undeniable, therefore the sense of “obsessiveness”, via these exploration, there is basically no stone unturned, as to who this soul actually is, therefore the masculine scropic energy are highly attracted to “openness”, or honesty as we describe. and meanwhile it is also highly protective of its own energy field against impure probing of other intruding energies, as this feeling of being violated by manipulative agendas are repulsive. The “Choice” of who and where and when to open his “soul” to is very important and sacred to him. I have in my own decision, terminated my contact with the man of my past, but that obsession is not done, meaning I haven’t gone through his energy field and find either merging or separation of souls, this is often what these energy interaction leads to… so the “unclear” intuition guided me back to the obsession of him, yes, it is very obsessive in observing him and looking at him via every channel I can find…just try to get closer to this soul… I didn’t have a clear understanding of any of these while it’s going on, I tried to rationalize what’s going on into compartments of what I understood as “friendship”, “good intentions”, “helping” and I tried the best with all the good intention of a confused mind could manage, I shared my life knowledge, my “self discovery” and care. Meanwhile I know that he has something going on with his ex girlfriend, whom had been his religion while we were together for the short four month, and may be the major road block for me to actually truly trust him with my feelings. As the confused mind rationalizes, of course, this “obsession” is filed under “friendship”, and I don’t really feel “guilty”, because that deep place of intuition knows none of them actually “loved” each other with nothing more than mind games. I have no respect for that at all, and also, part of the undeniable scorpic energy in me is paying no respect to social conditions but rather its own deep sense of integrity. To this I truly apologize to the both of them, I have unintentionally filled the role of a homewrecker to the weak, to the strong, there is no such thing exist. But I need to respect the weak, I learned that now, as I also learned on my journey, that “love” in its “feeling” exist to every level of human existence, the materialist, the sadist, the spiritual… everyone, no one’s heart breaks less painful than others, the only difference of a “living” love, or the living continuation of feeling in love is via nothing but real, down to earth, zero separation relating between two souls, that “survive” the different growth pattern of each soul through intuition, desire, feelings, and share determination , most people fall out of love via variety of reasons. But none the less, I want to apologize that I didn’t recognize it sooner, that I have abused my energy however unintentionally. may hap they do have a chance of growing something more real without me… but I cannot relive what I didn’t know, I would made the same choice being who I was. In reality, I did lead him on in the unconscious act of basking him in an intense energy that he might have never experienced, whichever name it was under, friendship or otherwise, and I didn’t know what I was doing, I was angered by the unfair “accusations” since I only had “good intentions”, but still very far from my intuition and feelings.
So here comes the part about the polarization of obsession, or the word freedom, the nightmare to him of my detachment. These scorpic penetration and exploration of another being eventually ends, it either ends with finding a soul that dances with its wavelength in every compatibility, or it ends with the passing through of an empty landscape… it’s grossly unfair, what I’ve done, to this I am truly sorry, and would never do again to others… the fact of the after math of the penetration without staying… Ihttps://chasingthecool.wordpress.com/2007/09/18/scorpio-man/ didn’t know, I was obsessed or engaged, while blind… only via the pain I witnessed I begin to understand, I’m still trying to understand this discerning in eagles, that what stopped an unfiltered fixations, as I used to see as “discrimination” and “judgmental”… it’s actually compassionate in the sense that what it means to the people it left behind…because when the obsession ends… it ends… the intuition and feelings can’t be controlled…the self remorse, the seeking to kill this unaware energy of ignorance, is a compassion based. To this I am truly sorry to all the little fishes of this word… and my redemption is my willingness to open my soul to share this journey, may be it will be healing to all it touched in some way. and my hope that as I should never blindly causing pain, pain itself is to the door way of finding self, and self love. I’ve written too long, and it had only covered one topic obsession, I will continue when I have more time.
Hi JoJo!!!
So good to hear from you!
” it’s grossly unfair, what I’ve done, to this I am truly sorry, and would never do again to others… the fact of the after math of the penetration without staying… ”
Scorpionic penetration actually has a divine purpose…duality limits it actually, It is because of the energy given by the male scorpio to the (divine) female. She usually knows what to do with it, while women who are not in contact with the divine, will only see the sexual side of it.
Women fail to see the higher energies of themselves…so yeah…they will say “We had sex.” instead of seeing it in terms of “themselves” on the relationship.
“I LOVED him in the most passionate way, and gave myself, unconditionally, with divine innocence, to him, while we were intimate.
“I felt the most beautiful energies in the universe, while I was in his arms.”
The energy of love, is not a selfish, insecure, suspicious energy…nor is it a fearful one. It is a self – sustaining nuclear fission/fusion reaction inside of ourselves, which through surrender, radiates from the inner to the outer.
Nothing here that we have written can truly describe this energy that really should be the spirit of loving a man.
Gatubela,
Perhaps I need to clarify something…the context of what I share here, is not the merit of being or what is a beautiful energy, nor it is to tell people what to do, but the merit of sharing, which is to put your innards on the table, however raw and unrefined, and let this act and the act of going through this rawness be an act of self-honesty, and let the act be an act of tearing down the barrier of fear to love so that all these come near may feel the motivation to up lift through self openness…. strip naked in front of the mirror remember? lol, and the penetration I speak of, have I any idea that it is actually the act of psych sexual energy? no, I was operating under the self righteous delusion of “friendship”. no… I wouldn’t do that again, and I am truly sorry.
Dear Gatubela,
This is a very good description of how I feel when I’m in his arms.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
Where was I? yes, Obsession, the only thing I would add more to this topic is that while I was obsessed, I feel I was incapable of deviate from my fixation on a core level in terms of attention… it’s like something has gone out of me and no matter who else knocks on my chest, I wasn’t really completely there. Of course I didn’t know this with the clarity I feel now. And to speak of that deep intuition, yes, we have to listen to it, it doesn’t matter what the mind tells us, how stupid it made us feel, or how unlikely it looks like what we do makes sense… it feels like… you have to fight it to not to do it, that your focus keeps being dragging back to it… so do it… it holds meaning in the most unexpected ways, in the end.
And the journey itself is bloody to say the least… darkness? certainly. sadistic? … I was gifted with a persistent virus and no matter what I do I seem to be unable to get rid of it on my computer, my sanctuary of a private soul was violated without consent, all these done by someone I had trusted, I did not trust him with my feelings, but I had trusted that he would never hurt me this way, boy was I wrong, I had a horde of peeping toms looking at my most private of thoughts, including his ex, that vile feeling I could never wash off of my memory… I cannot describe the rage I felt, I had never in my life been pushed to that extreme darkness, I feel the overwhelming need to destroy, and I actually could, I had a verity of ways envisioned in mind how to bring the whole lot of them down, because I actually know who some of them are, and it would actually work… I don’t need to crack down all of them, all I need is to break one down I’d get them all… I could do it, I see their weakness so clearly it shines like a beacon in the dark… I have no “reason” not to do it, I wasn’t feeling “loving”, I felt hatred, rage, vengeance… I feel so sorry I ever came back, so stupid that I actually cared, used and abused for every kindness I ever done, crazed with rage… I used verity of tactics to trap them, so I’d figure out how bad the virus was, I didn’t care anything, I hated them so much I just want to get rid of them for good… I probably yelled enough fuck you to last me three life times.
It’s so draining to remember these pain and rage… I have to stop…will continue tomorrow.
Hi JoJo…
Oh…delusions of friendship…sorry about my post there…I was actually responding to your responding to S.O.
A virus? I am sorry about that, JoJo. Betrayal really bites you in the ass. I soulfully empathize with you , on various levels and also through my own experiences.
I know that words can´t change anything that happened. For me, the rage was hard to handle too. It still is…
What is left is to pick up the pieces again…and usually, alone.
Strange huh?
Be strong.
Dear Gatubela and Jojo,
Thank you for your posts, I will respond later today to them.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
Hi Jojo,
I’ve followed your journey here…. I’m glad to know you are doing fine!
During those days when I was in deep pain of being amputated by Mr Scorpio I find it quite liberating to write in this forum. It somehow release the poison lol. I feel understood and loved… I commend you for sharing… hugs!
love,
Mari
Thank you Mari, and Gatubela, I have grown a deep respect for you words are insufficient to say it, I let in be in the stillness of the energy.
Back to this painful journey of engulfing rage… I felt I was gang raped… my pain, my cry, my pleading was mostly unanswered… so, everything eventually comes to what am I going to do about it. With this rage at the brink of commit murder, I ask my self what am I going to do about it?… while I was in the height of it, I threatened to get him fired, I know I could, and I know what it would mean to him if I actually did since I know his situation… I aimed to hurt… all the others involved recoiled from my pending threat of retaliation, I know what their fear is, it shines like a beacon in the dark to me. He didn’t say anything, and he didn’t back off… it bothers me, as to why he is not afraid to actually physically parish, and why “hurting” me is more important than his life? This fact was stuck in the middle of my consciousness and I couldn’t help but fell bothered.
In the height of becoming the devil I feel I want to be… I decided I must raise higher than everything, I will not allow anything in my life to have the power to bring me down, and I have to be higher, and that can only be becoming the universe. This is the fork of the choices Bella described as not to be consumed by the darkness of the darkness inside everyone of us… it is the choices we make every and single time we are give a fork in the road as to where we are going to end up. In the silence of of my private universe, I united my pain with that of my tormentor, and cried the tears of the oneness of human suffering… In this stillness I begin to dissemble my rage, actually, once we achieve stillness inside of our soul, your core sense of self-honesty, right or wrong, truth or lie begins to transform all the feelings it carries inside. In this face-off of “self”… I ask myself why I was so enraged…In the name of obligation, I had told my husband what happened with a withe washed version of truth, to avoid the war I envision if he had known what I was keeping doing. He gave me the usual lecture of being irresponsible by putting our family, our son at risk. But this fact didn’t engulf his life, his feeling, he lived as he always lived and told me “why are you keep doing this” every chance he get. Yes, why was I so enraged? it is a virus, it doesn’t stab me nor bit me, if someone was out to steal my identity, temper with my life in any way, I know who they are, I can deal with it. It is true, privacy is extremely important to me partly because of my scorpic nature, largely because I have lived under the shadow of death threat for years, it’s the scar left of that experience. But do I really believe someone is going to get my address and murder my family at night? no, I don’t really… so why was I so enraged? why do I feel so betrayed? It is then I begin to realize that I was still “in love” with him… the delusion of “friendship” is nothing but a delusion, that no one in their right mind would get this worked up over what a “friend” did, that no one would even have private and intimate thoughts of a “friend”, and feel violated when it was polluted by the peeping eyes. I recognized he was right, “friends” is truly bullshit I insist on believing… but no matter that I figured out I was still obsessing over him, I don’t WANT to be with him, I don’t trust him, I cannot imagine to bond my life my everything to what I had felt after that four month of “good times.” , I never felt “loved” no matter how many songs, quotes said otherwise.
So the choice was made, I need no man to give me my freedom, although I feel jailed, I would live as if I’m free. and that I would do everything to make him understand that my choice was to move on. We all have one life to live, we don’t ever need to feel sorry to chose who we want to spend the rest of our eternity with. Life, liberty, pursuit of happiness.
I proceed with that, I whiled a sword of intense energy, and cut at the hand that was holding on to me, cut ties, as he put it. I can, I have been to his mind and soul and know all of his dark secrets. Every cut goes deep… no, it wasn’t something sinister, but rather the simple fact of point out his lower-self to him, why I can’t stay, coldness… basically, sadistic in the sense although I continuously make him feel unwanted, I didn’t withdraw my intense energy, my obsession wasn’t over, I still didn’t know it. So I cut his skin, his flesh, his bones, eventually I cut through everything that was holding on to me, yet he still reaches his empty wrist towards me… I couldn’t understand it… I couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t let go, not death, not pain, nothing would make him let go… I don’t understand it. but it deeply bothers me. I told him how the fuck he could want this pain, that he actually enjoyed it, it is not the “love” in my book.
It still bothers me, so in the stillness of my private universe I asked myself why? and it came to me, that although a man has all the reason in the world to let go, it wouldn’t move him because he is in love… then why is it so easy for me to want to leave? have I ever, truly loved him the way he is in love with me? It is a moment of revelation of self-honesty, I see I have never truly trusted him, but he probably didn’t trust me either after all that pain I gave him, yet he is not letting go, and all I want to try is to leave. I begin to questions all that I ever believed in myself, my ability and willingness to “love”… I lost faith in myself, I didn’t know who I truly was anymore… all the things I’ve said, believed in me, all the kindness of character when no was said to me, how does it holds up when “yes” was said to me? I begin to see although I point out the darkness of his soul, I neglect the light in it, because I wanted out… I see although it is very true his “greed” is a factor of his motivation to love me… it is certainly not all, for the amount of effort he spend on me, he would of gotten three rich man’s daughter… so it becomes clear that it is not only what I so coldly point out to him… but the truth of the oneness of human nature, the lower and higher self is inseparable, in love, in everything.
Why do I wanted to leave? when a man is willing to truly love me, yes, he is willing, he puts a red cloth in front of a bull every time it tries to leave the scene, he finds strangest of ways to put himself in my line of vision when my obsession begins to subsided, everything point out this is a man has more willingness than I ever could imagine to begin a “love” with me, no matter the “games”… the motivation is undeniable. And I was actually feeling obsessed about him, fixed on him, what is wrong with me? I don’t want to be loved? isn’t love the energy that heals and grows and transforms? was I the biggest lie there is?
In stillness it came to me again, my nature, my obsession, what has transpired between us, everything went through me. Then I realized, it is actually very very simple… although I have powerful masculine energy at my disposal, I probe, penetrate…but in no way I want to FEEL like a man in a relationship, stripped of everything there is to strip in me, I just don’t want to feel like a man in a love. I don’t want to change a man, I have zero desire to WANT to transform him,if he is not in the intensity of transforming himself as an utterly independent being, with or without me, if he is not saving himself.
I want to be the damsel in distress and having knight in shining armors to slay dragons for me, I cannot imagine life in the reverse. I’m stronger in heart than so many men I know, yet in physical world I love everything womanly, my cloth, my accessory, the way I talk, I carry myself, who the hack would ever guess I have a masculine soul living in me? So all that energy in me, it feels without a mate when it doesn’t meet its match, it desire someone even stronger than me, someone bigger than me… I had this intense interaction with his soul without his presence in my private universe… and I see how mine has failed to merge with his when it was done, it’s so strange, I spend almost two years to finally reached this point of complete bare naked self honesty, and full vision of his soul without my distortion, it took few days for that dance to end… and at that end… I simply detached. I don’t even know how, I just felt it, the obsession is gone…
I am so sorry, I feel like a five year old driving that tank of intense energy, and demolished his walls to get to his soul when I’m obsessed, yet when I get inside, I lack the grace of true male beauty which I know he has in him, to save him as men for eternity gallantly saved women, protected women… I ask him to save himself. I’m utterly, selfish… but this is my truth.
When it comes to the fork of road of what do I do with my understanding with all the choice in the world, when it still held true that my energy pains him when I won’t stay, what do I do? I chose to share my journey… no matter how painful, truth is the lest costly way to anything and everything. I’m so sorry I have to go now. When I giggle with my son, I feel every piece of me is THERE, I know there are so many fears associated with my physical reality still awaits me to face them, one brick at a time to remove that road block to my own zero separation… but I can’t truly feel sorry in that deep core place for leaving everyone behind, for the love of me.
Hi JoJo,
“In the height of becoming the devil I feel I want to be… I decided I must raise higher than everything, I will not allow anything in my life to have the power to bring me down, and I have to be higher, and that can only be becoming the universe.”
This sentence….
….brings tears to my eyes…it moves me – my heart and soul with soulful emotions….it makes me feel overwhelming joy and beauty…
It resonates….
Dear Gatubela,
In response to your last post of 1545, I have the following “feelings” which resonate within me at the moment…
No, the standstill makes me feel dead, and makes me feel sad at the same time. It makes me feel uncertain and sure of myself at the same time (does this make sense?). It feels like I’ve gotten used to this “in-between” situation with Adam but it feels like I’m sinking in a swamp at the same time. Ready to be swallowed up by murky waters. I feel I’m living when I’m with Tom. I feel he gets me when we are together.
Does this make sense to you or would you like me to elaborate a bit more?
I will respond to your other post as well now.
Thanks,
Scorpioobsessed
Well…I would like you to elaborate a bit more, with regards to your feelings for Tom…
You have to be clear on what they are.
So, remember, that who should know about these feelings, is him, not me…
Take the time within yourself, to start things by being honest with yourself, and then reflecting this honesty in your life.
Making a decision to do this, has nothing to do with Getting the Scorpio Guy…
It has everything to do, with your own integrity and who you are…if you decide on doing so.
Please understand, that these choices, are for you alone to make, and you stand alone in the consequences of them. I mean…ALONE.
So, I don´t know what you should do…that is something that you have to FEEL on your own…
I don´t know how Tom feels about you…so I hate to assume as to what the next step is. I can only surmise based on what you have said.
The truth is, you have to reach an understanding with him…and be prepared for him saying that he does not want to continue with the relationship.
Well…actually it has to do with the polarity…
The hot and the cold….these extremes at the moment are being jioned through “passion”…
I could be very wrong…I am not a guy!
So…I just want to know…perhaps through his “raw passion” he also seeks to be receptive to transformative energies?
Meaning, sometimes a person has to walk the edge of things, in order to feel certain truthes. Any soul seeker will understand this…as deciding to be soulful, actually means that you will have to eventually deal with life and death energies. It is not easy dealing with an energy that forces you to FEEL the edges of yourself..and especially with scorpio, whose energy is actually at the base of creation destruction – which are very sexual energies.
It is like you come into focus with yourself…and this is a very powerful feeling, in terms of inner sanctuary and balance.
You always test yourself, if they are actually REAL by the way…and most people don´t understand that either. I mean, what is secure for most people are their paychecks.
For scorpio, what is secure first, are their inner worlds…and then they manifest this inner reality….paycheck is important, and so is responsibility,,,but only because – mainly – they FELT it inside themselves.
Again, you have to try to feel him on such raw levels and understand him.
He probably has a very good idea of what he needs…it will perhaps be a matter of trusting him and him trusting you in terms of RAW vulnerability…
Again, if you are lost, then you don´t feel your own guidance. You have to feel the inner guidance as a gut reation and instinct, and not what people are telling you. I include myself in this category.
What does your gut say? I mean…you could be wrong about how he is, but he should enjoy the fact that you are trying to understand it! Not many women dare to try to understand scorpionic energy, beyond how it makes them feel.
Dear Jojo,
Thank you for sharing your innermost feelings and experiences. I apologize for not writing back sooner.
Thanks for your insightful post of 1537. At some point I plan to also read your posts of a few months ago which describe what happened with your Scorpio man and how this lead to your realizations and self-growth. Well, your question “Why…you would WANT someone whom could very possibly be the wrong man for the rest of your eternity?” is right on target. Sometimes I feel foolish for having such strong feelings for him that I am unable to control. Unfortunately however I do not operate according to such logic—I wish I did as I would perhaps have a much easier life.
Regarding your post of 1546, you are correct, there is the delusion of friendship and no self-honesty. I appreciated your sharing of your own journey of self-discovery. So that I can be clearer, you are saying that your Scorpio did not love his ex-girlfriend as they played a lot of “mind” games?
I refer you to what you wrote, “the intuition and feelings can’t be controlled…the self remorse, the seeking to kill this unaware energy of ignorance, is a compassion based. To this I am truly sorry to all the little fishes of this word… and my redemption is my willingness to open my soul to share this journey, may be it will be healing to all it touched in some way.”..can you clarify this a bit further?
In 1547, reading your story made me emotional as well, I can’t imagine what you went through. I’m in shock that you had to deal with such a violation of privacy from someone you trusted…no wonder you felt uncontrollable rage.
“While I was obsessed, I feel I was incapable of deviate from my fixation on a core level in terms of attention… it’s like something has gone out of me and no matter who else knocks on my chest, I wasn’t really completely there”. This sentence describes me exactly. It is ALL-CONSUMING.
In 1550, I understand why you got to the point of threatening to get him fired…you felt so betrayed that you fought back and threatened to become vindictive yourself. “This is the fork of the choices Bella described as not to be consumed by the darkness of the darkness inside everyone of us… it is the choices we make every and single time we are give a fork in the road as to where we are going to end up.” Your story made this clearer to me, and I commend you for your inner strength in achieving this…I don’t think that many persons would be able to deal with this in this way.
“It still bothers me, so in the stillness of my private universe I asked myself why? and it came to me, that although a man has all the reason in the world to let go, it wouldn’t move him because he is in love… then why is it so easy for me to want to leave? have I ever, truly loved him the way he is in love with me?” So would you say then that your Scorpio was in love with you?
Your description of your detachment and how the obsession was finally gone is thought-provoking…and I would not call you “selfish” by any means, based on what you have shared.
Gatubela, I will respond to your latest posts within the hour now.
Hi S.O.
“This is the fork of the choices Bella described as not to be consumed by the darkness of the darkness inside everyone of us… it is the choices we make every and single time we are give a fork in the road as to where we are going to end up.”
I would like to kind of give you more of an idea of these choices for people who are truly working on themselves, and not enjoying the more lower aspect of their energetic selves.
Not many people will understand what this means, but I feel that this applies to men and women.
You choose to be enslaved or to be free. How does scorpio feel knowing that they are slaves? Once that realization hits, that they are not MASTERS of themselves, this creates a huge volcanic reaction.
For scorpionic women, I have not yet seen one that has truly decided to work on their energy and ARRIVE to a STATE of LOVE. I can imagine that this could be the lack of understanding what TRUTH in power is. But a short definition of it is that simply…Truth in power, is not obtained “in the outer world”…it is nothing that any person can make you feel, when you excercise it. It is the realization of your own inner gifts and being, based on your sensitivities and what you currently perceive around you. Meaning, everything that you feel is misunderstood in yourself, by others, in the way that you function and how you deal with people, actually, are potential pathways to these gifts.
The lack of understanding for scorpio is because nothing sought outside of yourself, can “ground” this energy. So, again, the intensity that you feel inside, does not match what you see outside. It is a general feeling of unbalance…and it is keenly felt.
Most people don´t understand this because they choose to conform their inner world and balance them with the outer one. Not scorpio…who will correctly feel that doing so, means something along the lines of “selling your soul” and deathly.
So the perception that in general, people work through a kind of osmosis mechanism obtaining “homeostasis” between society and their souls, by opting to “balance” is a real “stinger” for scorpio and of course, their relationships.
People really don´t understand that it is scorpio who has been rejected by them, and not the other way around. This forum should be more along the lines of how scorpio deals with people rejecting their energies and how they show their true selves in how they deal with that… by getting angry, feeling rage and crying, when coming into contact with scorpionic energies, who are in fact, not giving in to compromising to balancing their inner worlds with what is currently the enslaving, hypocritical, reality out there.
The fork in the road scorpionic choice, will usually be based on choosing what takes them out of their inner intensity. Anything that does, means that they are betraying themselves, or it is related to these types of feelings. They have both mental and energetic tools at their disposal, therefore the aspect of control becomes very important. Scorpio feels this keenly, when they are out of sync as it will feel , dark, ambiguous, deep and emotions go completely out of control.
Maintaining this focus on self, is in itself a journey. And of course, no one gets this. Actually, sometimes not even scorpio will understand, if they are not consciously working on their energy. But for the readers of the forum, the working of this energy will usually be manifested as some sort of passion for something…or a state of being.
The truth is, mars energy activates due to a kind of DEFENSE mechanism. That volcano, is our radar for transformation…based on the “lie” we are currently detecting. There will be no logical explanation for it…none at all. It will just go off.
So…
For many people, the solution to problems lies in the darker energies. You see it in the movies, and the current culture out there. We have to fight…argue and defend. Have we really changed as a society during the last 2000 years? I can say that no, not really. A person who truly feels the plight of the suffering and weak and strives to do something about it in order to exact the change required to END IT….will suffer terribly.
So, if the current comfort zone is to deal with our issues by feeling darkness, then great! So…clear your darkness people, by working on (and not denying the existance of) your anger, rage, sadness, lies, by understanding it not feeling guilt or hopelessness) and releasing through gentle compassion and tolerance towards yourselves. How you love yourself, will be how you love others…and no one picks this up better than Scorpio!
Clearing your darkness just means, when you feel anger, CHOOSE to deal with it by feeling a state of love in you, by understanding it, to its source. You will see, that it is not Scorpio that is making you feel this way as one of the beauties of this energy is that it has the potential to bring out the truth of your darkness as being the path to your light.
Dear Gatubela,
Thanks for your analysis, it was helpful and I am reflecting on what you have written here.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
Dear Gatubela,
I hope all is well with you. I respond to your posts of 1552-1553. Just to give you a small update, Tom and I communicated the last few days—three days in a row he and I made plans to see one another, and all three times he cancelled on me at the last minute (the last cancellation being last night–Saturday night). And in his text message he said that perhaps we could meet today, Sunday, but that he was not sure, and that he would know at the last minute (!) I chose not to respond as I feel if he truly wants to see me, then he will suggest a day and time and stick to it—his message yesterday was not even apologetic when he cancelled.
I initially felt enraged but that didn’t last for long—I felt extreme sadness and cried a river last night and today. I mean if he didn’t want to see me he could just say he doesn’t want to or if he didn’t want to be direct, then he could tell me that he’s busy and that he would contact me in a few days (and then fail to contact). I don’t get why he gets close to making plans and seeing me, and at the last minute cancels on me—3 TIMES IN 3 DAYS! I have NEVER done this to him nor to anyone!! My friends comments range from “He doesn’t know what he wants”, “He’s doing it because he knows you’re a sure thing—and you’ll be waiting for him”, “He wants to hurt you for some reason, otherwise he wouldn’t be playing these games”. Of course you will ask me, what do you think, how do YOU feel? Well, I feel extremely sad that a person that I have shared so much with and feel in love with (I know you will say here that perhaps I’m not in love with him based on my prior posts) is behaving in this inconsistent, hurtful manner. I feel that if I were strong enough I would stop thinking and wasting time on him—on a person who isn’t even thoughtful enough to at least respect my personal time. Highs and lows yet again, and I feel extremely depressed. So, I ask you, HOW can I understand him if I don’t even SEE him?!?! How can I feel him when there are such lapses in communication—via text message and 2-minute phone calls? I used to have good instincts, but now I don’t even know anymore. I also feel that if I loved myself, I wouldn’t be hurting myself by being so emotionally involved with a person who does not seem to value me. I’ve gone so far as to think that I wish I’d never met this man—I have endured more sadness with this than with anything else. And where has this gotten me? To a place that is even darker than I was ever before and in a state of even more confusion. I will stop here you know I have the tendency to ramble and perhaps you will view this post again as meaningless words.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
Well, the reason that you are feeling these strong feelings, are due to your choices for the relationship…lol.
You are not choosing to understand through a transformative death of your own ego, S.O.
If how you are at the current moment, is not giving you understanding, then HOW DID you in FACT, think you were going to ACHIEVE it?
Because you are not a TRULY understanding person in the first place, is the reason that you can not understand “anger”…”rage”…and the word “NO”.
Which means that behind your comments, is the strong sensation of INTOLERANCE…
Probably not what you show to the world, right?
Little Fish,
I ask you to see yourself in a state of stillness, ask yourself, why are you so sad/pained? Have you been “listening” to what Tom is telling you? Yes, most people in this world act within their social conditioning, meaning they are “game” based, everyone has to be playing this “game”, they rationalize anything they do not understand into the compartment of life as they lived. But, if you have the chance to meet someone who actually is “different” than this norm, respect it, otherwise you are doing nothing but to dismember him into the smallness of your known … it frustrate me when I just can’t be understood.
Ask why YOU are so hurt, what is the state of reality of a person who has “moved on”, is every emotion, action, lining up with the reality of “moving” on? Or are they in the state of “continuing” the stand still of prolong the inevitable? If so are they then truly moving on? So ask YOUSELF, why is the sadness? Like I asked MYSELF why is the rage? And eventually you would come to the fork of the road of YOUR own reality and what YOU are going to do about it, not what HE would do about it, his reality is in plain sight, like K’s (I will refer to the man of my past as such from now on) reality of “he is not going to remove that virus from my computer “ is in plain sight, then what I was going to do about it? it is NOT what I want to live with, but what I HAVE to live with. So it comes down to YOU will face every choice in the universe how to deal with this reality, and every choice of this reality is available to you. Pain can be overwhelming…but dose it has the power to DEFINE you? it is OK if it does, it is OK to live life of your own choice, as long as you are at peace of who you chose, with clear consciousness, of who to become. This is the moment to strip naked in front of the mirror and ask yourself that question, and in doing so, you will take RESPONSIBILTY of the CHOICES of your life, understand if you chose so, it is YOU who is wasting YOUR time, and if you feel you can’t not NOT to waste your time, then is it a waste? Like the reality of no mother want to lose her child, but if the unimaginable happens, the truth of living with the pain of forever having a part of your heart missing a waste of time? No, it’s the rich make up of the richness of human life, pain is part of it.., it doesn’t hinder your ability to LOVE again, to LIVE, to be ANYTHING you wish to become, it gives you the chance to expand yourself to a bigger person, IF, you chose to WALK the journey of FINDING self, actually BEGIN this journey…
I’m so sorry I can’t be “sensitive” to your feelings the way you want me to, I can only be sensitive to it the way who I am and what my emotional reality is to me… and I can only be more truthful and reactive to my feeling of frustration, before I can FEEL your emotions, I FEEL my own. So I can’t tell you if I feel sorry I ever walked into his life, it is not MY decision to make, it is MY decision to make if I feel sorry he ever walked into mine, and I am not, I’m deeply grateful and humbled and thankful to his presence in my life, I’ve gained so much of me through him… and what I take from my life experience is WHO I AM, not WHO HE IS.
Beside share my reality, what else can I do? I’ve moved on. And what do you want from him? That through him you understand yourself? understand him? Or you just never want him to stop talking to you? you just never want it to end? but little fish, it had ended…. And he can’t relate to never ending it, he can relate to helping the both of you to move on, through silence or through communication, heal if he can… if he can’t, it truly is beyond his ability…
Take care of yourself little fish, he truly has nothing but good wish for you…
Hi S.O.
” and what I take from my life experience is WHO I AM, not WHO HE IS.”
Oh…yes..this is a hard one for many people to understand.
The view that “he” caused “me” so much suffering, pain and sadness just sinks us further down into wanting to retaliate back. That is your darkness, S.O….and it will feel vile.
These energies will come churning up in you, seeking some sort of expression. Therefore, you have sought more darkness in listening to your friend´s darkness, getting angry, crying, feeling emptiness…
Can you feel it growing, bigger and bigger now? This is not his doing, it is yours, and he will just stay away from it. It feels right, does it not? Telling your friends, without the true intention of “understanding”. Like there is nothing wrong with it? That is the seduction of your own EGO.
The only sign that you have, that you are handling things wrongly, is that the end result of what you are doing is getting you more confused and deeper into your own “monster”. Therefore, you are not feeling peace, kindness, compassion, understanding and love.
There is nothing beautiful in what you are choosing to do…even if he saw that you had the potential to choose otherwise…you DID not make those choices for him.
Again, I would like to reiterate…you are NOT an understanding person. You rely mainly on your INTOLERANCE to handle your problems.
Like JoJo, I am sorry that I can not be more gentler on you. I can only say what it took for me to end my wars…
Have a good cry…and open your heart. FEEL GOD instead of going to your friends for advice. Those energies are much more positive and healing.
Little Fish,
To answer the question of your WANTING him, I mean your intuition is far more truthful than your awareness, your FEELINGS are much more truthful than your UNDERSTANDINGS, so you have it the other way around, you would have an “easier” life of self deceit. You would have a “harder” life of self truth, yet your soul knows itself far better than you, for it SEEK to be closer to something it yearns to be, you didn’t find yourself intensely attracted to someone that’s “easier” for your life didn’t you? you find you “love” the feeling you have when you are with him, you haven’t come near the truth of WANTING HIM FOR HIM, you have come to the lesser truth of wanting him for what he makes you feel about yourself, a more clear picture of WHO YOU ARE, he, is totally, and completely abandoned in this picture. Do you see why his soul is not finding its mate in this reality? He can’t find his reality via you… he is eternally hungry.
To answer the question of K and his ex have not loved each other, yes, I truthfully did not feel any soulfulness in either and both their interactions I’ve witnessed toward each other and themselves. So I do not call it love, other than games. Sadly, games are what the majority of soulless existence know, and what “love” is to them.
I have answered my motivation and purpose to share, and my method of finding self via the earlier post today.
Yes, K was and is in love with me.
So it has come to the point where it no longer feels right to linger here, it feels like that words are triggering the false space of stalling life. It comes to the point where someone has to let go, this act would be far more “real” than thousands of words now. Someone has to initiate it, and I feel it has to be me, feeling like a man again, but it feels like I don’t have a choice in this matter. So I won’t speak again, here or else where, let what happens, happen.
But before I go, I do want to share the last of my reality, I want to share what it feels like to me… it feels like I stand under a bridge, where K was standing at the edge looking down, silently saying:
“look what you have done to my life, you’ve pushed me closer to the edge than anything that ever happened in my life before, yet it takes so little for you to save me, it takes just that easy act of simply staying, that easy words of you actually care, how could you not? if you ever want me to believe in that kindness you all preach, why isn’t it you can’t be kind to me? why isn’t my willingness to give my all, everything that I am, will be, is not enough? if a person’s everything is not enough, what else is there to believe? why should I be kind/loving to anyone, why take away the only real kindness I had believed and put my faith in? now everything just feels like a big lie, so prove me wrong, prove it to me this world is not this dark place I feel like everywhere I turn. Yes I’m acting up, if I won’t who would notice me, if I won’t how can I change anything I feel powerless to change?”
I look at him with stillness, I’ve told him all my whys, I’ve confirmed what I believed it’s the truth no matter how strange it sounds for me to wanting him to understand his feeling, to me to distort his feelings so it would make me feel less of a monster is a true betrayal. it makes sense, but it won’t change how he feels about his reality, and I’ve left that familiar comfortable old self of distorting someone’s soul, someone’s reality to fit my own need to stay in control of my understanding of things, so I’d feel less of a monster. so I’m not going to try, I’m not going to try to tell him how he should feel, or what is right or wrong, or ask him to understand me. I am going to tell him the reality that rubs wrong on what he believes what goodness is, I’m going to tell him you are right… sometimes our best effort, all that we are, everything within us we are willing to offer… is truly not enough. sometimes we stand on the edge of a bridge, there is truly no light, only darkness surround us, if a world is like this, if the world does feel like this way to us…what are we going to do about it? you brought me to where I stand, ask me to bear witness of your pain and demise…it’s because you truly don’t want to die, you want to be saved, you wish this belief you had about life, world, love, goodness, kindness is true, you wish I would act to confirm its truth, act to conform the easy black and white vision of reality that was your world, you hated me for making you stand at the edge, but I am actually the only person you will believe no matter how much you hated me and distrust me, you trust me if I represent the humanity of this world to not let you down, so you can believe in love, in devotion, in best effort again… but I can’t give you that… I am not the representative of humanity, I am but a human being, I cannot live to save someone else when what ask of me is not an act, but a life lived, I have to live to save myself first, I am an utterly selfish being, I can’t imagine to live this only life I’m given for someone else, no matter what is the cost, and this is my choice. So this world is this dark place without a single beam of light right now, no one is coming to save you on that bridge, you are the sum of the universe of choices man makes for his life, and you are free to chose, free to feel.
I will just silently stand at the base of the bridge in this same darkness when you make that fork of a road into a choice of a life lived, I stand in the darkness, knowing if you chose to let go of all the goodness you believed in, all the fight you put up, I will forever in my soul knowing this mingled body parts under my feet, is the consequences of the sum of my own choices, it would also be my karma.
So this is it, the end of us.
Dear Gatubela,
Thanks for your posts. I will respond to your posts of 1555 and 1557. You write, “Because you are not a TRULY understanding person in the first place, is the reason that you can not understand “anger”…”rage”…and the word “NO”.” Perhaps you misunderstood, he never said the word “NO”. HE contacted ME, set up the days and times to meet, and HE cancelled on ME. How am I expected to show “TOLERANCE” to such behavior? If he did NOT want to see me, perhaps he should express the word “NO” as you say, directly. But he did NOT, and again I remind you that HE contacted me on his OWN initiative. Correct me if I’m wrong, but in a way you seem to imply that I am to blame for his behavior. However, I have never in my life behaved in this immature way of teasing someone, getting their hopes up to meet and then pulling the rug from under them, like he did to me the past few days.
And this brings me to what you wrote “The view that “he” caused “me” so much suffering, pain and sadness just sinks us further down into wanting to retaliate back. That is your darkness, S.O….and it will feel vile.” You are absolutely correct here—my viewpoint is HE is causing ME this suffering (as I wrote above). Indeed, it is my darkness. And yes, you are right in that it gets bigger and bigger and becomes a monster.
“Again, I would like to reiterate…you are NOT an understanding person. You rely mainly on your INTOLERANCE to handle your problems.” Please tell me what you imply when you say that am I being intolerant?! That I am angry for his hurtful behavior and I am not accepting of it? That I am trying to make sense of why he would behave in this way and I can’t seem to do so? That I feel betrayed by him for telling me he wants to see me and then being let down? That I am pained every day that passes that I don’t get to talk to him and see him? If what you mean is that a tolerant person would be ok with and compassionate with his behavior, then, perhaps I do not fit your meaning of “tolerant”. The funny thing is that the first adjectives that my friends use when describing me are “tolerant” and “flexible”.
“I am sorry that I can not be more gentler on you. I can only say what it took for me to end my wars…”. It is truly wonderful that you have managed to end your wars and you have been able to find such self-strength in you and have gone through the self-growth that you are encouraging me to go through. I am not sure I will be able to do the same, in the manner you are describing, however I hope that someday I manage to find some peace with the situation with my Scorpio, regardless of what happens in the future.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
Hi S.O.,
“Correct me if I’m wrong, but in a way you seem to imply that I am to blame for his behavior”
Yes, I will correct you when I feel that you are wrong and …No…I am actually implying that you are to blame for YOUR own behavior…you just don´t seem to feel that you are responsible for it, exactly…It won´t matter what your friends “think” of you…They have made love to you as well and know your intimate zones?
You want resolution to your problems by receiving some sort of validation that he is “wrong”…and you are right. That you are “FEELING” something “uncomfortable” and therefore, you have to take it to him, in order to emotionally bond with him and recieve some sort of “relief” from whatever is making you uncomfortable. You will try to talk it out, and reach some sort of compromise, I am sure. It feels that this is the right way to solve a problem, and I am sure that you are a great “administrator” of compromise based on your sense of compassion and flexibility.
Except that, scorpio does not see it that way…not when they don´t compromise their own souls…and refuse to balance their intensity with…what….yours?
You have not demonstrated True flexibility here…nor tolerance….I mean, when it comes down to it, and you are “offended”, your tolerance seems to go out the window, and so does your compassion. Again, it won´t matter if he called you…he will see your darkness the same way as I have..and will choose to stay away. Are you willing to admit that your friends are lying to you? Or that you are lying to yourself?
How much do you want control of the situation now, S.O.? It seems that you are not thinking of anything else, but your own negativity. You have left him…as much as you perceive that he has left you…
I mean this in the gentlest way …but you have to know, that your intolerance is VERY REAL…and it keeps you from understanding >>>>ANYTHING. You don´t understand “HIM” …therefore you do not have flexibility…
I know about Piscean mutability…and you should be able to adapt to the good and bad, by merging with his feelings…if he is willing to share them with you …and then detaching (don´t drain him by being a wet party pooper fishy)…and then reading the energetic difference. THAT is TRUE compassion…I sure as heck hate to give yer posterior fin a smack…but there you go… *smack*!
Or are we dealing with piscean “lets flow with the negative lazyness” as well?
If you feel that your growth is not worth it, then of course, that is your decision. No one can obligate you to do , what you don´t voluntarily want to do.
Growth is who you are…not your life circumstances…so you don´t need to imply that I feel that people have to suffer in order to do it. Your sense of hopelessness just makes you depressing.
It is not my fault that people just don´t choose love…
Dear Gatubela,
Your attacks on my character and situation are quite shocking and come out of nowhere. You are harsh, unfair and you do not know me or the situation or him at all.
“You have not demonstrated True flexibility here…nor tolerance….I mean, when it comes down to it, and you are “offended”, your tolerance seems to go out the window, and so does your compassion. Again, it won´t matter if he called you…he will see your darkness the same way as I have..and will choose to stay away. Are you willing to admit that your friends are lying to you? Or that you are lying to yourself?”
Um, I am not “lying”—I am very open and nothing that I have written on any of my posts is a lie—as witnessed I think by my writing the original story where I shared so much of myself (as I recall last week you thanked me for my “honesty”—perhaps then, I should say that YOU were “lying” to ME as well?!?!). When I have been confused, I expressed it. Sad, I expressed it. Angry, I expressed it. As for being “offended”, yes, when I am offended then I become intolerant. But that doesn’t make me a liar and I resent being called that when there is not a single lie that I have told here to you, or to anyone on this forum. Sorry if I am not being “compassionate” at being called a liar by someone who is not even specifying what she says I’m lying ABOUT.
“No…I am actually implying that you are to blame for YOUR own behavior…you just don´t seem to feel that you are responsible for it, exactly…” What behavior of mine am I not taking responsibility for, exactly?? Why don’t you be a bit more specific? Since the post we are talking about had to do of how he contacted me to meet and cancelled three times—I have done nothing wrong with THIS INSTANCE specifically. As for PRIOR behavior, as you recall also from my prior posts, I DID admit to certain things that I did wrong with the situation, and right on this forum. Already in a week I recognized certain actions that I took that made the situation worse. So, your attack is very unwarranted.
“If you feel that your growth is not worth it, then of course, that is your decision. No one can obligate you to do , what you don´t voluntarily want to do.
Growth is who you are…not your life circumstances…so you don´t need to imply that I feel that people have to suffer in order to do it. Your sense of hopelessness just makes you depressing.”
Of course I feel like it is worth it, as hard as it may be, and I hope I manage to do so in at least a small way. Perhaps not with your attack-type method however and judging someone’s character without knowing them.
Lastly, it seems that any written word of mine lately is being misinterpreted by you—such as when I thanked you for a post you wrote and told you I was reflecting on it, and based on these 2 sentences you called me a liar and “how I truly am”?!?! I do not attempt to paint any kind of picture of you, how YOU truly are, or your character, and would never would think of judging someone based on a 2-sentence post. I don’t KNOW YOU, nor would I ever have the arrogance of assuming I do, even though you have written so much on this forum.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
Hi S.O.
“Sorry if I am not being “compassionate” at being called a liar by someone who is not even specifying what she says I’m lying ABOUT.”
Yup..you are lying to Adam…you said it…clearly. Not me. Now you want to have credibility based on “emotional” weakness to passion, and not your own actions?
“I am not “lying” (another lie, but hey…that´s ok.)
No judge of your character on my part…You did that all on your own. But you have now escalated this situation to the fact that I have…and of course, other things as well. Thanks for showing me your idea of tolerance and flexibility. Yes, I thanked you for your honesty…but you are still lying…that does not change anything!
Oh…I understand…I was supposed to be like your friends, and “lie” to you as well? Comfort you by making you feel good? I guess no one can be honest with you then. You prefer the lie, and will defend it, by accusing me, with the things, that you really are…
Just peachy.
Hi S.O.
“Thanks for your analysis”
Lol…that is the kind of thing that makes scorpio sizzle…
Look…your “intolerance” and “flexibility” have already told me that you are not “truly thankful”…
So stop the lies…pretty please with a cherry on top.
Dear Gatebula,
??? WHOA–Did I miss something here?!?!
I was interested in what you wrote in your post, and thanked you–why on earth are you being sarcastic?!
And accusing me of lying because I acknowledged a post of yours positively?!?!
I don’t understand why you are so hostile all of a sudden?!
No, I am not being hostile…Hostile would have been with me swearing and being rude…
I am simply sharing with you, how you truly are…
Thanks for seeking understanding, S.O….and your quick honesty…
I appreciate that.
Monique
Actually…if you remember, it is you that was/ is actually lying to Adam…
I did not say anything that you have not clearly indicated that you are doing…I am only asking you to “stop” it.
Don´t you think it is time to choose “honesty” instead of “lying” when “in love” with someone?
I mean this in the most gentle way.
Gatubela,
In this case, YES. Of course, in this instance, I have been lying TO HIM on an ongoing basis. And yes, I am not proud of it and am slowly finding the strength to stop.
“Don´t you think it is time to choose “honesty” instead of “lying” when “in love” with someone?” YES. YES, and YES. I am not “in love” with Adam, as I have written before in my prior posts, but as I wrote above I know it is very unfair to him.
This weekend I had one of the most honest conversations with Adam that I’ve had in years and expressed how I truly felt. It was hard for me and I am proud of myself as I am for him for his own honesty. While we have more to cover I believe that we will do so in a relatively short amount of time over the next few days and weeks.
Best,
Scorpioobsessed
Dear Gatubela,
I’m responding to your post of 1553 and 1552. First of all, I’m trying to work on myself so that I can get to be at peace with the situation with Tom. Of course, this is easier said than done and I’m sure it will take me a very long time to manage it, if it all. I don’t think I should write more about my feelings at the moment till I get them sorted out. Perhaps in a few days I can elaborate more, however.
“I don´t know how Tom feels about you…so I hate to assume as to what the next step is. I can only surmise based on what you have said.” Indeed, and since I have not seen him in a few weeks, I can only use my senses. I am feeling various energies from him at the moment and am still trying to settle on a few of these. In any case, this situation with him has really brought me to my limits and am trying to get in touch with my true feelings in order to deal.
“So…I just want to know…perhaps through his “raw passion” he also seeks to be receptive to transformative energies?”. Perhaps. And I deeply sense that he is not at peace with himself and is going through his own hell. Just a feeling I have.
“What does your gut say? I mean…you could be wrong about how he is, but he should enjoy the fact that you are trying to understand it! Not many women dare to try to understand scorpionic energy, beyond how it makes them feel.” Yes, I do think he is receptive to this.
Thanks,
Scorpioobsessed
Hi S.O.,
ok…we can take a break for a couple of days…or as long as you want.
If you are beginning to feel him and his energies, then probably, you won´t need any sharing from anyone of us then…Be prepared that he may not want to continue with the relationship.
BUT…you learning to feel a man´s energies is “wow!” I mean…WHO CARES if you ARE WRONG? OR HE IS WRONG? OR WHAT YOUR FRIENDS SAY?
Not if you are feeling >>>> HIM! and he is feeling >>>> YOU!
Just remember to always be yourself, learn to trust that, and don´t lie.
Stop lying!!!
Gatubela,
GEEZ…I AM *NOT* LYING!!! You really upset me in your last post. In any case, it doesn’t matter what you believe anymore, I know in my heart that I am not lying and this is enough for me, I never thought I’d say this, but it is.
Yes, I cannot describe my feelings at the moment…however I am feeling a small part of his energy, I can sense it. I seem to have found some of my instincts. Perhaps in a few days time I will be more aware…
Thank you, (and I do not mean this sarcastically!)
Scorpioobsessed
Hi S.O.,
“While we have more to cover I believe that we will do so in a relatively short amount of time over the next few days and weeks.”
Are you ABLE to feel what is right for you? Are you feeling that you are trusting your instincts, feeling the situation, and LIVING as you should?
“GEEZ…I AM *NOT* LYING!!! You really upset me in your last post. ”
Hahahaha! *Yes you have been* …I am one stubborn kitty S.O. Don´t get upset at the ambiguous…You are quick to judge character yourself, actually…based on “what you “think” and not “what you do”. If you had not lied in the first place (action), we would not have had this heated (mental) conversation.
Wow wow…. ladies…. Gatubela, I thought it was P.P. job to scare the socks off helpless bunnies LOL Not much compassion on either side, hey…
Little Fishy, it is really simple… ALL men want an emotionally stable, independent woman, period. Except Scorpio men WILL search for it, WILL demand it (in their own, subtle ways), WILL wait for you to become one and WILL walk away if you don’t. So he cancels three times… makes you angry, confused blah blah blah… you project this back to him (even without saying – he will pick up on it)… The question is – is this (cancellations, ambiguity of behaviour) acceptable to you, together with all the corresponding emotions? No? Make it known to him, in the most COMPASSIONATE, NON ANGRY way. Without BLAME. Help him to get through to you.
You are blessed to have this guy in your life, get to know him REALLY, from ‘the neck up’ – who he is, what really drives him in life, what his priorities are etc. etc. Get to know THE PERSON behind the facade of looks, sex and petty behaviour. You may be pleasantly surprised.
Good luck
‘Compassion’ – do onto others what you want other do to you. It means literally FEELING together with another, and acting on those feelings.
Hi S.O.,
I did not mean to scare you. I mean, I did not see you as a person who feels fear…so easily…I did say that I appreciated the fact that we are seeking understanding.
I may have upset you…but clearly you have to understand, that lying on any scale, does not equal flexible and tolerant.
This means that you are feeling how it is to stand alone, for the choices you make and how you will “love” in your relationships.
Compassion: “Deep awareness of the suffering of another coupled with the wish to relieve”…
You will only know how to love, once you love yourself. Accepting the parts of you, including the lying, can be done, in a gentle, and brave way…
That is not “neck up” S.O….
Hi Ines,
“Gatubela, I thought it was P.P. job to scare the socks off helpless bunnies LOL Not much compassion on either side, hey…”
“‘Compassion’ – do onto others what you want other do to you.”
Our definitions of compassion seem to be a bit different…I actually am not in a “wanting” state of being.
And actually, I was not aware that P.Puppy scared the socks off bunnies..Are you sharing a personal experience?
My socks are still on…(and they are warm, comfy and fuzzy too!)
Hi Gatubela,
Yes, your definition is closer to how I understand compassion.
My personal experience here has taught me NOT to take myself so seriously and relax into the fabric of life around me. It feels very liberating.
Thanks.
Hi Ines,
“My personal experience here has taught me NOT to take myself so seriously and relax into the fabric of life around me.”
Oh…then we are different…
But that does not have anything to do with the definition of compassion.
Thanks for sharing what you don´t take seriously…
Back to the cave… Evolution, or, rather, revolution in my case, bloody and harrowing, with parts of flesh (me, old me) amputated … every day another piece of jigsaw falls into place, and it hurts and also feels wonderous and unbelievalbe.
I am reading the Bhagavad Gita, it is simple and profound, all that we spoke about here… all… I am fed up with myself, because things are harder in practice than they are on paper… Focusing mind… anyone tried to keep your mind on ONE object, without it wandering off to other things? I last for less than a minute… what the… how HARD can that be? Yet, without learning how to control your own mind willfully – nothing can come of this new understanding. I FEEL it with every molecule of my body, this knowledge… I don’t need to sit on a mat in some yoga class and meditate – I am now my own counsellor and guru, I was granted access to this knowledge via my acute sensitivities… But yes, will power is my weakest point, has always been… so it is difficult to discipline mind and body, yes… this body too. Every waking moment of consciousness… the intensity of it is killing me.
And so we practice refrain from polluting others with our emotional and mental states, the same as not letting others do this to us… a path to love and higher consciousness is fraught with pain… I come out tonight, a clear dark sky, I find Orion and Pleiades… and start crying uncontrollably… It is part of me, I am part of it… Why does it feel so… distressing? Why do I start crying when I think about it?
Hello everyone i’m having some trouble with a scorpio man i recently got involved with.. can anyone out there please help me.. i would really appreciate it.
First of all me and scorpio guy met right around and little before thanksgiving.. we got along so well right away he was so sweet and nice and caring/loving. at the time i was going out with my boyfriend of 2 years and scorpio guy knew this but yet he insisted in pursuing me and would not stop with everyday texting me and would not take no for an answer so eventually i gave in and i really started to like him alott we saw eachother every single day for a month and a half and i eventually broke up with my boyfriend and scorpio guy liked this and was happy we would hang out makeout but nothing further than that.. but he would always tell me about how good he was in bed and how he couldn’t wait til we did the deed so.. anyway fast forward to today iam now going out with scorpio guy he asked me out about 2 weeks ago. Everything seemed fine for the first few days when we finally did it.. he wasn’t all that great and he knew i knew this only because i sorta made a rude comment right after it happened.. somewhere along the lines of “thats it” i might have shot down his ego i think.. so we’ve tried doing it again about 2 more times and it still wasnt all that great.. this guy cannot last
he’s a 2 min man which i’m sorry to say.. but i’m so frustrated because now he seems really cold to me.. even though i’ve told him that its fine that he couldnt last in bed that we would slowly work on it as a couple..but he rarely texts me anymore or says anything sweet.. he’s mean now… he just seems off and i dont know how to handle the situation?? everytime i try to talk to him about it he gets defensive and thinks theres nothing wrong with the situation and maybe its just me… =( pls someone give me some words of advice.
thank you
Hi Karina,
“He´s mean now”…
In this forum, there is a term…M.I.A., which is “missing in action”…but it seems that another one is coming up >>> “Meanie in action..” lol Again, most women perceive this as a rather negative response to the relationship. But actually, your negative responses are based on him not doing, “what you want”, based on how “you think it should be done”.
This is a subjective view that is based on your ego IF there is no struggle for truth, love, understanding, or those “under your world transformative energies” that actually is scorpio´s world.
Karina, what you think the problem is, it is not. Can you FEEL that what you wrote in your post, has not come close to identifying what the REAL and TRUTHFUL issue is?
Do you feel love? I keep on asking this question, because its presence in you and him, (as firstly experienced as LOVING YOURSELF) helps alot in resolving these rather tender and vulnerable issues.
I feel that you should have concentrated more on what was not seen or perceived by you…and the deeper truth about your frustration, as felt by your own internal energies…and not caused by “HIM”…
There is always a way to handle our “frustrations”…the first one is throwing it outside, as an external physical experience. And the second is getting to know yourself, and experiencing a kind of mutability.
There is a sacred raw beauty in the simple act of a man and a woman removing their shirts and just standing there, in front of each other and not doing anything.
“and experiencing a kind of mutability.”
Meaning…inner transformation, self knowledge about your own sexuality, questioning whether love depends on sexual satisfaction, and of course, working on those very tangible energies…if you are able to perceive them.
It also entails, the potential of working on the emotional bond, having higher spiritual feelings (other than the “2 minutes” lack of satisfaction) and getting to know “HIM”…
“everytime i try to talk to him about it he gets defensive and thinks theres nothing wrong with the situation and maybe its just me.”
You have to feel your own energies, and make a decision. Who ARE you?
Your bruised his ego… that’s all.
Move on.
INCEPTION
“I know how to search your mind and find your secrets. I know the tricks and I could teach them to you so that even when you’re asleep your defence is never down. Look if you want my help, you’re gonna have to be completely open with me. I need to know my way around your thoughts better than your wife, better than your therapist, better than anyone. This is a dream and you have a safe full of secrets and I need to know what’s in that safe. In order for this all to work, you need to completely let me in.”
Very Scorpio… I watched it together with my son…It does not evoke emotions, it makes you think on a deep level – IF you know what to look for.
Subconscious and the Power of Mind
Many layers, some so inaccessible we do not know how deep it goes, hence the three levels in the film. The subconscious mind RULES, and we have no idea… It manifests in our (UNLNOWN to us) projections to others – behaviour, motivations, thoughts, moods, deeds. Decades old patterns we are unaware of… What we think we knowingly say or do – can have an entirely different meaning if we dare to look inside of ourselves. So limbo… you get stuck mentally chained to something that had changed in your life (‘die’ before entering limbo), and there is no escape… and you go nuts. The offset of a mental illness is often self perpetuated.
The totems… our own grip on reality, a way back… Have you noticed that each character had their own individualised totem? It is OURSEVES we have to check against, to see where we have crossed over to the illusory world, our mental creations. Our OWN mind… we have a CHOICE. To go deep inside of ourselves and discover where our illusions are. To say No to the games that our mind plays. To UNDERSTAND and change through wilful action.
It reminded me of Derren Brown, the British mentalist who exploits the power of suggestion by imbedding thoughts in our subconscious without us realizing it. Yeah… Just look at the advertising industry…
Love
Ego based love can be a blind trap where we create a mind/emotion dependency, which turns into an obsession – living through each other, building up an alternative reality of feelings and emotions, a dream-like state between the two… This is especially relevant to reality of love of a Scorpio man… ‘Do you know what it is to be half of the whole?’ The intensity of the offering, each given moment receives 100% concentration on another >>> in which a sense of SELF is lost… You have given away your inner identity, in soft traps, bit by bit. You become so immersed in each other’s worlds; what happens if another goes, through death or breakup? The guilt, the mental map of what once was – becomes a prison of high walls of the past… He says ‘These are moments I regret, the memories I need to change…’ Unable to let go, and the mind goes round in circles… over the same old phantoms again and again, with every little detail recollected and lived through… a torture. Lost to love and lost in love.
There is more to it, but it would take too much space.
Self-love… feels like a form of PROTECTION against… SELF. Another paradox.
You sound like an existencialist…
“Existentialism is a term applied to a school of 20th-century philosophers who, despite profound doctrinal differences, shared the belief that philosophical thinking begins with the human subject—not merely the thinking subject, but the acting, feeling, living human individual. In existentialism, the individual’s starting point is characterized by what has been called “the existential attitude”, or a sense of disorientation and confusion in the face of an apparently meaningless or absurd world. Many existentialists have also regarded traditional systematic or academic philosophies, in both style and content, as too abstract and remote from concrete human experience.”
The following story in this link, depicts the meaninglessness of “life” and what we do with our meaninglessness…the endless wait for something that never appears..
http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/godot/characters.html
The endless wait, for something outside ourselves to releive us of our “coreselves” , without feeling love in our hearts.
Facing our “coreselves” in this reality, is truly agonizing…because once the illusions are stripped off…the mind must “detoxify” itself of that drug.
You are left with “hell”…the ultimate REAL ZERO ego moment for some…
because there is nothing to “soften” that up…no love…no fluffy bunnies…no rainbows…your world seems empty, lifeless and barren.
Surprisingly, if you are scorpionic, you will begin to FEEL your own true sexual energy and sexuality…and crave…”emotions”….the only ones that will pull you out of this “harsh” reality, and loop, are the ones linked to the divine…the cosmic ocean, as something beyond yourself…greater than you…Because in order to create, without illusion, you must feel linked to this great peaceful energy.
So…their can be no (subconscious) co-dependant projections on others. How you struggle to do this, can be a turning point in your life. For me, it has been opening my heart, ONLY in this HARSH REALITY….and not before.
i.e…seeing the truth of the lies I am living…and not depending on dreams.
You can see the difference in the love energy between someone who has their subjective ego self as the center of their universe as the principle perspective of “loving someone” and someone who feels something objectively beyond, and releases their need to “attach” rational meaning to everything.
“I know how to search your mind and find your secrets.”….
That definitely provokes emotions….
“if you are scorpionic, you will begin to FEEL your own true sexual energy”
I don´t mean this in a perverted way…other than you begin to see the difference in wanting sex with a person, and channeling this energy to more spiritual regenerative matters, and dedicating yourself to trying to get out of illusion.
So, while in non illusionary HELL….what comes to you and how you feel your way out of it, can become your “truth”…and what you feel is real.
It must be different for everybody…but hmmm…try to “get angry” in this state…or feel love, while having the “illusions” that you are addicted to, purged from you. Love is not the first thing that comes to you.
What comes is a very RAW instinct ..and which subsequently, for some reason, grants you the passion and the will power to search for emotions that will END it permanently…through resolving it to its complete cathartic manifestation.
There are no dreams in hell….lol.
I’ve had some personal insights into the nature of meditation and how it relates to sexual energy. The higher purpose is to achieve the mindful consciousness and attain a state of being free from physical body confinements, via control of mind states. Now… I feel there is a BIG difference between masculine and feminine objective there. Think a Scorpio man… the devastating inner war between own feeling states, sexual desires AND realisation of own humanity, as opposed to animalism… with sexual energy potentially enslaving the man to his lower-self = lack of control over who he is. If he (the man) has any grain of self awareness – he KNOWS that. The Buddha was a man, right?
For a woman… I can only speak for myself, but really, how potent and URGENT are female sexual desires? In simple language… how horny do we ladies get? How often? How STRONG ARE THOSE DESIRES? How mind blowing are they? While I can certainly whip my body into that state via undisciplined mind, i.e. fantasies and imagination are to blame – the sexual energy does NOT reside in me as a permanent, hungry beast, always looking for an outlet. The feelings and thoughts (imagination), however, DO. My sensual ‘huggy’ ‘kissy’ ‘touchy’ self gets aroused via THOUGHTS of affection and tenderness. See the difference in the direction of male and female desire? For a man – from the base up. For a woman – from the heart down into the base. So for me personally meditation is about mind control with a goal of mastering those THOUGHTS, not the sexual base energy I poses. The sexual energy is a gift from the masculine for me, as and when it happens. A vessel ready to accept the release of that energy, and I don’t mean it in its crude, literal sense…
I cannot even BEGIN to imagine how potent and all consuming the energy of creation must feel for a man. Fascinating. I find it really hard to put into words, but I feel the difference and the meaning at some core level… Meditation was invented by men, for men, to realise their full potential as divine conscious humans, and so to obtain spiritual freedom… from their animal selves. We as women have to understand and RESPECT that. And we don’t.
“Think a Scorpio man… the devastating inner war between own feeling states, sexual desires AND realisation of own humanity, as opposed to animalism…”
Feeling states… that feminine energy geared towards INNER and towards seeking ultimate love. And that clashes with>>> sexual energy, the masculine, Mars driven, OUTER based, which rules DESIRE. Not just sexual, but desire to be out in the world, to reach, to attain, to conquer. That psychological make up is no joke. No wonder those opposing energies create a massive conflict within. And no wonder many Scorpios are bewildered by own ambivalent states… until they are brave enough to ask why this is happening. Leading to >>> painful transformative change.
What a shame that the judgemental anger here drove ScorpioObsessed away from sharing. I enjoyed her openness and eagerness to learn.
Gatubela, I have read everything you have written on this forum. I have found you to be warm, loving and helpful. In the case of S.O., however, you were unkind and judgemental. You owe her an apology, in my opinion. This will scare others away from sharing here. How sad.
Dear Lady Spirit,
I appreciate your message and I thank you for reading my story. I was indeed eager to learn and I enjoyed reading the helpful responses/feedback by Inessology, LoveMari, Jojo, and initially by Gatubela, however you understood correctly that I felt Gatubela was very unfair and judgmental as I continued sharing. This is why I stopped writing on the forum as I do not feel comfortable sharing more due to her unfair hostility that upset me. I hope however others continue sharing and hopefully they will have a better experience than I did.
Thanks again,
Scorpioobsessed
Hi Lady,
“Thanks” for your judgements as well, without seeking understanding.
I did not judge her. She was very open about her lying. I just asked her to stop it. I guess there is no nice way to do it…The hostility perceived by you, was nothing that she did not show herself…I just did not turn a blind eye towards it. I met it head on and brought it to her attention.
If you have read my comments, then you know that I have always said that I share based on my own lessons and experiences…my own judgements of myself…So, it would have been better for you to have just plain said, Gat…your life experiences and the choices that you have made, were harsh, hostile and judgemental, upon yourself. I placed her comments in my heart, and for some reason, that is what came out.
I loved this in her last comment….
” In any case, it doesn’t matter what you believe anymore, I know in my heart that I am not lying and this is enough for me, I never thought I’d say this, but it is.”
And this beautiful statement as well….
“Yes, I cannot describe my feelings at the moment…however I am feeling a small part of his energy, I can sense it. I seem to have found some of my instincts. ”
I won´t apologize for that REAL communication from her part….
Lady Spirit,
Gatubela may have been a tad rough, but please understand there is never a false intention there on her part. May I remind all that our residential Eagle gets away with much rougher comments, and no one ever complains… except the one who communicates with him directly. Things easily get misinterpreted on here because of the mode of communication. Forgive and forget.
Little Fishy,
I kept thinking about you and how things are between you and your guy. I was enthrawled by your story and would LOVE to know what is happening. Please please share here. Also, if you feel like talking privately:
registerus666@gmail.com
I feel our ‘fishyness’ and ‘verginess’ manifests in similar ways, although you were more brave and straight forward than myself. I went through much worse commenting on here and am still standing. And a better person for it too.
Love,
Ness
P.S. Puppy… show your face, damn it.
Neptune entered Pisces until 2026, people. Years of love, romance… and illusion are upon us. Enjoy.
“You’ll be alright …. Detach yourself. If you know the flow energy is a one way street, you can do something about. Move on.”
“His concerns in other areas of his life, are prioritized above you… which actually a good thing. But the kiss of death is… he really can’t or doesn’t want to INVEST his time in you. That’s the reality.”
Yep. There are infinite possibilities out there. To explore, to enjoy, to give, to keep being open to those and drink in every moment as it comes. BUT. It is eeaaasy to give advice when one is NOT in that state of dependency, hahaha-haha…
Ah no, darling. Wait till you REALLY love again… that is IF you LET yourself. I KNOW the intensity of feelings that surge through you, don’t you fool me. I brew my own pretty well and you know what? They make me feel INSPIRED. Of all the things that I could have chosen to do with those intense feelings – I choose INSPIRATION. To grow, to do things, to learn more, to be more…. to BETTER myself.
It’s a state of joyfulness. Thanks, baby;)
Hi people,
Some interesting things have been written. I hope you guys don’t keel over from paralysis by analysis? LoL.
Ines and Gatubela… from a spiritual consciousness or understanding… we should feel that others paths are literally not our own. We can offer our difficult experiences and share our problem solving ability which have made us stronger or aided our growth. But we cannot really ‘expect’ to feel the juice of life manifested in another, or expect the same inward perceptions and change in others as we discover in ourselves as we may have stumbled upon during our life long search.
We must be mindful and spiritually aware that people, human beings, do not ask probing questions because they are simply not aware of their origins which cause their pain or redundant situations. So as a result of innocently being unaware most people do not seek “advice” if their ego sanctuary of the mind doesn’t want to believe the Truth of another energy. I say this as it comes back to the universal understanding that people would rather throw their hands up in resentment (psychologically) and feel sorry for their moods and situations… versus digging deep into ones self and realizing the ultimate CAUSE of their troubles. So to ‘accept’ others is to love them but not “BE” of them… as that subconscious mind energy will just suck you in and create a clone of their noisy, vicarious reality within your spiritual stillness. Searching itself, is very personal practice to find an identity with a greater power. And through practice of emotional/psychological SURRENDERING is to “see” a being… conscious of scattered, meaningless mind energies which infiltrate our balance. Growing in mind and heart through personal and universal evolution is not a subscription for all people you will know and meet. In fact, you guys may never meet a single person who seeks higher meaning in their life. There’s an old adage I live and breath by in my life. I’ll share it here:
— When I let others be themselves…. I am free.
Again it’s simple… but immensely powerful in verb.
** Except of course when manipulative, controlling, insidious behaviors in others impose their fears and inadequacy into my world. The energy of my initial “acceptance” of that person quickly changes. Death occurs.
{{Eagle}} Alive and kicking… Good.
“to love them but not BE of them”. Yes, I realised that after having read my initial comments to Little Fishy. And had to step back a bit. Most people come in here in search of answers to their relationship dilemmas, not spiritual enlightenment.
I don’t ‘merge’ with another’s reality. You have NOT wasted two months ‘clubbing’ me lovingly. Have a bit more faith, darling.
Hi PPuppy,
I am very happy to see you back!
“I hope you guys don’t keel over from paralysis by analysis? LoL.”
Hmmmmm….
Well….>>>Your comments are welcome to transform that.
Hugs.
“When I let others be themselves…. I am free…..
…to love them but not BE of them…”
I love these 2 sentences…it is like they form “ONE” sentence.
That is.. It is ONE if we are all BEING too! ..
What a classy lady ScorpioObessed is to return and thank those who helped her.
Sadly, I cannot say the same for Gatubela, for her ego has taken hold. Step down from your spiritual pedistal from where you sit, dear one. You are not him….ya know, God.
Humility is beautiful. Wear it like a second skin.
Hi Spirit,
I am always willing to change how i am for the better…so please, can you tell me the WHY behind your imperatives?
I now have to stop being judgemental, step down from my spiritual beliefs and wear humility like a second skin now, because according to you, I am full of ego?
I can see that we differ incredibly in terms of our spirituality, as you perceive God as a “HIM”…
Anything else?
If not, please, give S.O. the guidance you feel she needs…I won´t interfere anymore.
Then I heard your heart beating, you were in the darkness too, So I stayed in the darkness with you”….
Hi Mari,
This is THE song I listened to after Scorp No.2 encounter, in search for MORE. In fact, there are three songs in that album representing the journey: Cosmic Love, Rabbit Hearted Girl and The Dog Days Are Over, in that order…
Florence Welsh is a Virgo, but she writes her songs in collaboration with Isabella Summers who is…a Scorpio. That gut wrenching angst in the songs… combined with Florence’s earthy understanding of the importance of the form… delivers the punch. The intricate journey of a girl’s heart…. Argh… Beautiful.
Thanks for posting that.
My scorpion man situation, would appreciate opinions. We met at a party 2010, I was immediately attracted (Leo woman). I had a lot of attention that night, from him and others, he backed off. A few days later I told a mutual friend that I thought Scorpio was attractive and the messaged was passed. Scorpio then showed up at mutual friends house and took me to another party, where he promptly ditched me. I had fun (with Scorpio’s friends so nobody threatening) but left once I saw him in another room not caring where I was (I was only there to see him.) A week later, he sees me out and is all over me. We spend the next few days partying (not drugs) when we are not working. I did sleep with him a few days later (NOT MY STYLE EVER, ONLY MAN I”VE EVER HOOKED UP WITH LIKE THAT). The next day I was bombarded with messages and we spent the next month hooking up. When he wanted too. But it wasn’t always sex, he’d tell me about his job, life, etc. But it was always on his terms when I saw him which got old, so I stopped responding. Finally I get a text saying “got it. won’t call or text ya anymore.”
Well we ran into each other a few times over the next few months. I never had bad feelings, I stopped responding too him. But he then sent me a text apologizing, also wanting to see me that night. I said no.
A YEAR later, I’m getting apologies again for him “leaving me without saying a word, and would like to make it upu to me. He’s felt like a fuck up since. That I was too good a person to do that do and he still feels like an ass”. I said “I appreciate you saying that. I never quite understood what happened” He has not responded 4 days later.
He’s not a bad guy, I never had that impression. I did actually think he was just awkward with women (but NOT apparently in bed). Is this a Scorpio who is interested in me or just yearning for sex (it was good, I’m a Leo XD)
He is into you for more than sex from what i read. Trust me.
I want to point out that if you don’t talk about something, he will talk about his life (what else will you talk about? you seem shy). Try and open up, then it wont seem like its “all about scorpio”.
As for it always being on his terms… try and make your own terms, don’t wait for him to try and make plans with you every time, don’t turn him down all the time either, he will ditch you permanently.
We want aggressive women who will try and get what they want, not just wait for us to walk on in, so to speak.
You were probably sending mixed signals or he just didn’t know how to decipher them and ran.
He would not say that he messed anything up, unless he means it and really cares.. especially after a year.
CLEARLY you are still on his mind.
I dated a Leo and it took effort.
Don’t wait around for him because he will NOT wait around for you…much longer lol.
Anyways you sound young so maybe your better off exploring some of the other zodiac signs.
Good luck best wishes!
P.S. he might just be REALLY good at messing with women. I bet that fucked your mind eh!
Thanks for your insight, you definitely raised some good points. And yes I’m a bit shy when I can’t read someone, and I usually can have some idea of what a person is about, he’s one of the few men I didn’t have a solid grasp on. When we were hanging out I did ask him over a few times, and he said no a big reason I backed off. I did make the first move in the first place. But in hindsight he had a very crazy schedule, he’s an emt but I took it as a blow off. As for me sending mixed signals I agree, but I thought scorpio men are masters at figuring people out! And yeah, he has stuck in my head lol. Ive never been ditched before!
btw DJ what is so hard about Leo women! We’re darlings!
I don’t think Leo women are “hard” or anything…it really depends on the people I guess. I was only speaking from personal experience.
Hi Leone,
You do not mention whether you felt love for him..and there does not seem to be TRUE communication between the two of you.
Do you trust your own energies and inner vioce? Sometimes we have to navegate these unknowns on our own.
Your questions at the end of the post, will be answered when you feel love in your heart and begin LIVING and BEING understanding, patience, faith, inner guidance, and TRUTH.
I do not feel that loving a person, requires him to be interested in you. Only that if we want to live in truth and free of illusions, with our own creations, the other person will seek to find love with you.
My experiences have taught me to seek love as the main foundation or “earth” in a relationship. Its the only thing that grounds it and makes it REAL.
I can focus on what my REALITY is…and all the obstacles that there are, but if I can not feel understanding, compassion, and all of that “good stuff” intangible energy with someone, and give it back as well, I know that I am living a lie.
.
I love it…
Answer a question with your own question.
Tell the OP to figure it out on their own.
Proceed to rant about your own life.
That was amazing.
Hi D.J.,
OK…I will try to not “rant” in my response to your comment.
I don´t really know what OP means…care to enlighten? Thanks for being direct and to the point.
That is an interesting comment coming from a scorpio man. You (scorpio) are men who understand what it means to listen to your instincts and are actually experts at “figuring things out on your own”.
It did seem that you used it in your responses to Leone as well. So…how did you do that?
You trusted your own instincts to clearly state “Trust me.” Care to share? For me, that actually would be amazing and I would just “love that” too.
“Proceed to rant about your own life.”
Rant: To speak or write in an angry or violent manner; rave. To talk in a noisy, excited, or declamatory manner.
Understandable perception from a man who is a Scorpio, since Scorpio is famous for their “non verbal” and “unseen” communication, right?
OP means original poster.
—
“That is an interesting comment coming from a scorpio man. You (scorpio) are men who understand what it means to listen to your instincts and are actually experts at “figuring things out on your own”.
It did seem that you used it in your responses to Leone as well. So…how did you do that?
You trusted your own instincts to clearly state “Trust me.” Care to share? For me, that actually would be amazing and I would just “love that” too. ”
–
Responses?… I sent one reply.
I didn’t “figure” anything out on my own… I read and I speak my mind.
Yes I trust my own instincts and I give the very best and truthful opinion I can, unlike you, someone who gives more questions than answers.
Leone is a LEO asking a SCORPIO for an opinion. Why are you even responding…
I said “trust me” because I am male and no matter what sign you are, we are all pretty much the same with women so, I’m confident that Leone’s crush is interested.
Yes “rant” was the wrong word, but you know what I meant so, don’t be critical.
Go hump a dictionary
Hi D.J.,
“Yes “rant” was the wrong word, but you know what I meant so, don’t be critical.”
You speak your mind, use the wrong words, but I am supposed to know what you mean….
That is exactly what I was trying to share with Leone. You expect me to “figure it all out”….
Yeah, it raises more questions, I know.
“Yes I trust my own instincts and I give the very best and truthful opinion.”
So, how was I supposed to know what you meant again?
DJ,
Nice to have you around… You want agressive women? Yet you don’t like to be chased… much. Where do you personally draw the line?
How do you flip the switch when the woman you are interested in A LOT – does not respond? How do you switch yourself OFF? I am curious.
Personally…the line is drawn when aggressive turns to obsessive. I do not enjoy 50 txts or calls a day. I want a woman with her own life, job, friends and goals.
I cant “switch myself off”. If she does not respond, it will bother me a little but I remind myself that she has a life and will probably get back to me when she has a minute.
If she still does not respond I will just move on and leave her alone. If she is interested, she will call back.. and I wont dwell on a crush that isn’t interested.
Shit happens and life goes on..
A healthy stance… I feel you guys have a strong self preservation instinct, stronger than any external circumstances. Interesting… Thanks, DJ.
I’ve been feeling down and sick for the past few days. Trying to find something to uplift my soul and found this heartfelt comment from puppy.
……….You see that truth is an ancient energy of love, service and care propelled and received as one, from the intelligence of beating our hearts. The heart hears and feels what the ego expels. The ego hears and feels the infatuations of it’s own desire for false perfection……….
*sniffle* so this calls for a sweet “Death” and so once again I found another “ego death” theme song (lol) from Mimi’s collection. Here is a beautiful piano cover from one of my favorite classic song of Mariah Carey “Hero”.
The Truth – A hero lies in you.
There’s a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don’t have to be afraid
Of what you are
There’s an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away
Chorus;
And then a hero comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you’ll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in you
It’s a long, road
When you face the world alone
No one reaches out a hand
For you to hold
You can find love
If you search within yourself
And the emptiness you felt
Will disappear
Lord knows
Dreams are hard to follow
But don’t let anyone
Tear them away
Hold on
There will be tomorrow
In time
You’ll find the way
I would like to share something here I feel is important and need to be said. what I want to share is the concept of making a choice. I don’t know what “choice” means to others, I suspect sometimes the word “choice” is often abused to substitute for the act of reflex, where most people call the act of acts with lack of consciousness a choice, I feel it’s light years away from what a choice actually is, it is not a simple mindless act of follow one route or the other, without seeing and knowing why, without stillness and acceptance to the nature course of making a choice into reality, without acceptance to consequences, without the clear consciousness of prepare to suffering while in its making.
I call the act of an alcoholic making a choice to become sober a “choice”, I call a person with social phobia making a choice to step back into society a “choice”, I call a person who finds comfort of the known to leave behind toxic relationship a “choice”. It makes no sense to me when the un-seeing public who live in the ignorant confident of throwing the word around like a tennis ball bouncing off every available surface, what do you know of making a choice? you never actually made one into reality, do you feel that in the moment of making words and minds and choices into reality, there will not be moments of craving of old comfort, cold sweat in the void created by willing destruction of the old, intense fear that makes a person physically sick and shaking, totally ungraceful to even claw a way through the maze of confusion and feeling of lost… do you not feel any of these will happen, you will scream in some unseen corner in unnamed suffering of going through bone structure change, AND NO ONE IS ABLE TO HELP YOU, do you not know one would accept all these, endure all these physical, tangible suffering because they WANTED their CHOICE to become reality BAD enough to suffer it all. Yeah, people will retell the stories of what other people actually lived through these choices as if they own it, as if they understood it, as if they lived through it. No, sometimes they are actually the act of cling on to their substance, their addiction instead of really making a “choice”. NO, making a choice is turning away from what will ease your pain, what will give you the moment of relief, what will make you feel OK again, you turn away because you know, you feel these instant fixes IS what has been holding you back, keeping you from winning the battle of your own inner confrontation, because if you actually have made a “choice” in your life, you’d recognize it, respect it, stop yourself from offering your bro that cigarette you so familiarly offered a thousand times before, stop making insensitive remarks that could make you feel a “better” person, step back in silence when words are not needed, find the fucking strength to respect a person who stepped on this journey, not making your fucking life into more of a mess, a dead weight on what a person already had to take on to fight their own battles because your own inability to fucking stop stalking them, get on the internet is not talking to you, what do you do when you know someone is stalking you on the street, yes, you fucking look back to see what is your stalker is up to, it’s not changing of mind. If I change my mind I will tell you in plain English to your face in ALL clarity, guessing game sickens me and you can take to your grave knowing with me you NEVER need to guess if I chose to be with you, and I expect the same honesty in return in any dynamic, some of the advice on this form is very sound advice: shit happens, move on. you want know what I feel about you? I will tell you what I will feel about you, as an other fellow human being that has nothing to do with me anymore, it will happen because it is what I know, see, want, in clarity and consciousness, it is what I want and my choice, so it will happen, accept it as reality, all else is what I need to go through to get there, it’s the process of moving on, yes, I do not want you, I do not want to talk to you, not in the slightest sense, don’t fucking wast your life on me anymore. life is too fucking precious to be wasted because people do actually die, and I’m telling you this because I will never consciously waste others life. and it fucking makes me angry because fucking people offer me drinks, drugs, sex, smokes, security because a life without it is a life without them, so they won’t let go, they call this love, fucking, dirty, love. go to hell. the more this happens, the more I am sure I have made the right choice.
and it’s not a virus, it’s sniffers, it hijacks your internet traffic, https doesn’t work, the determination of stalkers is greater than the obstacles of normal protection, yes, I’m pretty sure people from the form are stalked too, the only thing left to do is to change your ip meanwhile format ALL your devices or just stay off internet until you can do so, and protect your new ip from exposure done by email or any other means. it doesn’t matter if these warning are needed, it matters what do I do with information that could actually be important. crap, I’m so angry at myself now as I write about these things I shouldn’t speak, but I do snap once in a blue moon. fuck, I can’t post this while in anger. but fuck, why not?
Hi Jojo…
Darn…trying to take a bit of D.J.´s comment into perspective as I write…and not “rant” so much…!
Having the option to choose is a luxury. And the truth is, most of us are not aware that there are choices being made for us as well, because we may prefer to turn a blind eye to actually reacting to the lies out there.
The idea of making a choice in which you are prepared to suffer all consequences, means that it must resonate within your whole being, as to cause you to REACT and not just be indifferent and seek your own comfort. Some people really need the shit to hit the fan in there close environment, as circumstances begin to affect their comfort zone and they feel fear. So, they struggle to retain and regain it through various strategies….and for others, it depends on how much you feel and internalize it.
The more you are willing to feel, the more sound your choices can resonate within your being. This is related to the search for the truth and love…for why make a choice based on lies, negativity or illusion?
Also, sometimes choices have to be made and they won´t be pretty. For example, do you choose “what you want” (subjective, unattached)? or do you choose, “what is right? (objective, unattached”)
Well, this kind of choice means that wanting the right thing” must already be a part of your psyche. These kinds of choices means that one has to be able to detach oneself from the outcome of the reality that will eventually surface. Because all of our choices will “come true” so to speak. Learning to make an “unconditional choice” is a tough thing to be willing to suffer the consequences of what it takes to get there.
At the end of “the day”, we are all held accountable, for our choices. So, without really wanting to sound a bit depressing, how do we intend to meet our maker?
In a strange way, when evolved scorpio looks into your eyes, it feels as if they are asking you this question.
Most people look away and get all nervous. Scorpio would say, that their dishonesty to their souls is talking to their soul. However, a pure heart looking at scorpio´s eyes, sees “the truth” of theirs.
Hi DJ!
What is your sun, moon and rising? (Curious bull)
love,
Mari
I don’t really look very deep into these things… but I think I read somewhere that Ascendant is the same as Rising so…
sun scorpio
moon leo
ascendant virgo
Hi all. I am a taurus woman who was with my scorpio husband for 13 years. We have a son together. Here’s my story. We had an instant attraction to one another. The chemistry was explosive. In our marriage he had 5 affairs and yes i know what everyone is thinking after the first you should have left, but to this day I love him more than ever. Well the last affair (5) is the one were he asked me for a divorce. I have a older daughter nerely 18, who he loved very much. I moved out with my kids to another house and the following day he moved in with the woman he left me for. It has been almost a year that we have not been together. The divorce battle is endless and we are constantly fighting with one another. He tells me there is nothing going on between the two of them, but when my son goes to visit he told me they share a bedroom together. Oh i must add she is a Pisces woman, who lost a child, mother, husband and father in the last two years. Last year she had 3 affairs with other married men and caused two of those marriages to end. Last week i went to a party and he called my son to find out if he was doing ok, he then asked him if i was there with another man. Six months ago he told my daughter that he regrets getting divorced. A week later i called him begging him to try and resolve our difference, but he said that he did not love me anymore. There are days that I totally hate him and others that i cry myself to sleep wanting him. Why would a man leave a family behind knowing that he is destroying lives because of lust. I know scorpio men want to be needed and that is what i think he saw in this woman. He calls me from time to time, but he does it to make me upset, and when he has said his say he just put the phone down without giving me chance to talk. Maybe there is someone out there that can tell me is he over me, is there maybe a chance or does he really hate me so much?
scorpios do burn alot of bridges.no matter how much they are loved..it is a means to an end. death always.so they can carve out a new life.for themselves. guess it got stale hey.throw it all in the fire. im sitting back to watch.
“He calls me from time to time, but he does it to make me upset, and when he has said his say he just put the phone down without giving me chance to talk. Maybe there is someone out there that can tell me is he over me, is there maybe a chance or does he really hate me so much?”
Hi Taurus,
Don´t look for love with him…look for it within yourself. Taurus nature is very consistent and steady, and if I am not mistaken, is not fearful either. I feel that you could be someone who is strong for yourself and family.
I am truly sorry for your marriage and for your son and I feel that I understand a bit of what you are going through. These things are never easy to deal with, as we hold on to concepts and our own sense of duty and virtue, until simply, the truth even ruptures that.
It could be hatred….or it could be something else. If it is hatred, definitely, you should begin to make the decision to not be with a man who hates you! My question to you is, “Why the confusion?”
It seems that you are holding on to something that has “died” for him a long time ago. With his constant communications, it seems that he is either trying to kill it for sure! Trying to kill your dependency on him that is.
I am going to take a guess here. If he felt that you truly loved him, he probably might waver an itty bitty. And if you truly loved him, you would have respected his choices and energy as your own and sought out understanding. In a way , you have, and I admire you for it. This is not to be harsh to you, as love is elusive and hard to “nail” down. Love does not fail us, it is just that we fail to love.
Unfortunately, you may not understand what his idea of love is. You may have to face some very harsh truthes here, and that is something you have to do for yourself.
Being in his heart, means that he chose to “die” for you, through a series of transformative “death of ego” and trips to heaven and hell, cushioned in self love, divine love (if he feels it) and mutual support. This is not for the faint of heart, due to the huge surrender that is taking place. And…while he is transforming, the end result, must be “truth”.
He will be seeking your love energy, as that is the mutual support both of you need. At the moment, you are not in the state of soulful love Taurus. You seem to be holding on to a concept of love…which seems to be vastly different from his.
This truth must be the same, in heaven and in hell. Because for scorpio, this energy is the same. So…him destroying his ego, will be based on him sensing that you are doing the same. So, it will require that you release all of your attachments…to him and to everything. It explains the destruction of “everything” you know and how you are, as you begin to transform into something, beyond your current self.
The “truth” will literally interrupt the fabric of everything you currently perceive too. This can be a scarey process. I mean, heaven is nice and feels rather comforting, but you will have to also take a trip to “hell”…and that can scare the crap out of anyone. LoL!
In the end, it would be a pure love.
Pure love, means that after the truth is sought and felt, (very important here), he is in your heart – eternal. And that you “died” for him. Therefore, in this scenario, what keeps you together, will be based on true acts of love. And these true acts of love, can only be realized, if one has surrendered. If one has not surrendered. love becomes based on subjective choices, negativity, lies and denials.
This is a huge “unconditional” choice, as the truth is not yours to own and Love has no frontiers or limitations.
In a sense, you will never know if he is truly “yours” if you have no concept of the truth and love, and attempt to give up all, in order to obtain it.
Therefore, you must release him.
In a strange way, if scorpio is taking you to hell, he is asking you to see the truth of your heart and the lies of your own ego.
I have been having quite intense and obsessive feelings in the last couple of days, which made me go back to last year and examine all things Scorpio that took place… I still haven’t forgiven myself for those encounters… the one night stand in particular… Observing self as a lost and immature soul, from a distance of time and space evokes all sorts of feelings, and closed hearts are a scary reality, especially in oneself.
Yes, it was a Scorpio Full Moon yesterday… I wonder if anyone feels her effects in the same way? They are pretty consuming, at least to me. Easing off now, but darn it, it takes some effort to survive the assault.
fuck i knew it was in scorpio!.. had that intense feeling. in my moon.FULL ON. yeh assault definitely. i felt it big time.
Oh Umm, I did think about you as I wrote – I remember your Scorpio moon. So it affects you too… I usually get lots of energy during Full Moons, but this one was inwardly turned, and boy am I glad it is gone!!! I felt compelled to do certain things and to think certain thoughts which felt like a continuous punch in the solar plexis…. so decided to check out what was going on in the skies.
As a result though…. there is a need to draw a line in the sand and move on. So maybe it was worth the torture.
yes i also get lots of energy at this time.. kinda crazy energy, inward, outward ha everywhere..and yeh feelings of compulsion..just lots of feelings.and sexual energy.yep.i was really wired on the thursday driving north and feeling the buildup. then friday everything culminated. i ended up surfing a famous point break at night with the full moon light. was amazing.i just thought fuck it im going out there.water was like glass.all my senses were so heightened.
peace
just sharing my lil storie =]…..hey there yall im a cancer chick and iv been seeing this scorp guy for about two months now…i “dated” his friend which was aries (the worst match ever!!!!!!!!) we then broke up and me and this scorp guy ended chatting via a social network we didnt click immediately it took me quite a while because i was under the impression that his playing the fool and im just another girl his was targeting because he was well known and a ladies man too so id give him the cold shoulder. he immediately added me on fb and went thru all my pix and said that he was turned on by my pix and that he loves his women curvy, that immediately made me crawl back into my shell! i could see he was starting to get irritated by me but he never gave up and i kept saying he was just another big talker and i refused to give in and he said that he’ll prove me wrong when we meet. eventually i started falling for him and he made me believe we’ll have a future together once we meet. i noticed he was a very sexual driven guy but i refused to releave myself as sexual too i was being all typical cancerian girl and i told him i will not have sex wif him on the first date! everything but…the minute he step into my house i was blown away by his presence his whole aura is a turn on i flt so comfy around him was amazing! it was impossible to be in the same room wif this guy and not having passionated thrilling out-of-this-world sex! we then chatted and i became clingy and attached right away. we chatted differently or more him, he was acting weird i was beginning to thnk it was only the sex. i kept asking him and he said never!
we kept seeing each other but only on days available and all we would do is have sex..i’d enjoy every bit but wen he leaves ill feel lonely and sad and ill get angry when he doesnt text first! then there was this itmes i felt i had enough and i broke it off because i couldnt handle him being two minded. the one min he’ll fully agree on someting and the next min he rejects it! e.g this one time i said that he shud visit me but i told him my parents were gna be home though and we agreed that it was only gna be an innocent visit just as friends. as time came closer…me being excited told him that i just told my mom u coming over and he says to me that he doesnt thnk his up for it, this whole parents thing being home when he visits..i felt soooo much hurt that day i cried…later it turned into an arguement coz i wanted to know why and he refused to say much other then “because i just dont feel it” and i left it at there. the next day i told him how i felt about him and that i do not want to see him coz he clearly dont feel the same way about me and to him its all about sex he denied it but for me that wasnt good enough… to me it felt like he was angry at me for exposing my feeling towards him. not long and we made up immediatly…we just carried on like nothing happened then i decided i cant take it no more i cant take it being his sex buddy or whatever we never had a convo releaving our feeling for one another and we never met outdoors keep being at my place i felt like i was being used so i ended it for good! we didnt chat for a while and i randomly texted him saying that whatever we having this “friends wif benefits thing” its not workin for me no more iv got too attached and all he replied was saying his sorry but he cant give me a relationship… i handled it good surprisingly! few days later he texts me back i was soooo happy but acted cool coz i knew someday he would come back but not this soon…anyway i made myself clear tht im NOT having sex wif him if thats what he wants and he said no he just wants to see me and hang out but begged not to take our kissing away… he said he respects me and will not do anything i dont wna do…id mention things like i care a lot about you unlike you care about me and he will reply saying he cares about me much more then i thnk why would he get jealous…havent seeen him since our break up and ill be seeing him today yippie, never been this excited to see him…but we”ll probably have a chatt about eveything i hope i reallly do see a future for us! just thought ill share this story wif yall
and wish me goodluck for this time ey hopefully this is it i really do like this dude a heck of a lot you people have no idea…its sad how much i cry for him…
Hi Cancer…
Good luck!!!
These words are dead on, our blogs are unrelated but go and read my words and you will see, the evolved scorpio man is pretty much the same fascinating creature.
I will definately follow this blog, you may find mine to be interesting as well.
Cheers brother!
i recently met a Scorpio and it all started of long distance until i asked him to visit, and so he did! he came for 3 nights and we got to spend the whole day together but never the evenings. i am a Pisces and we supposedly must be very compatible. the spark is there and i really like him, but could never understand the mix messages he sends. i just can’t seem to figure him out, therefore dono what to do to get him more attached. i was very clear from the very beginning that i am in this, looking for commitment. And he didn’t seem to mind, but i am afraid that he’s just in it to waste time. btw i haven’t slept with him nor did we even kiss…we only held hands, hugged and kissed cheeks. What should i do now?
Hi Tara
The nature of your question suggests that you are having some framework as to how and in which way you and him are ‘supposed’ to be involved. You don’t need ‘to figure him out’, and you certainly don’t need ‘to get him more attached’, you two have just met!!
Enjoy your time with him, without placing a heavy burden of expectations on both of you. And (very important) enjoy your time and life WITHOUT him. Let it unfold naturally. Be honest and upfront, be kind without compromising your integrity and your values. He will take his time getting to know you, and I mean REALLY know you… your strengths and weaknesses, the backbone of your character and femininity. There is no such thing as ‘wasting time’ when getting to know each other. After all, you do try a dress on before buying it. You look at the cut, the fabric, the colour, you see if it suits you, you see if it lasts more than one season…. do you know what I mean? So… ask yourself too – is that dress a good fit for ME?
Relax and be at ease. RELAX. He will appreciate that.
Good luck.
Hi Tara!
“but could never understand the mix messages he sends. i just can’t seem to figure him out, therefore dono what to do to get him more attached. i was very clear from the very beginning that i am in this, looking for commitment.”
Well…it sounds like you are entering the scorpionic abyss. Most people will see it more in a negative light and try to look for ways to regain control, as is tentatively indicated in your comment.
Getting someone attached to you – when the reality of the situation could be that attachment is a destructive illusion, under the energies of love, as love, in my experience, permits flow and growth (change and transformation) instead of fixed attachment and consequently, stagnation. Also, why this “chioce” to act impatiently, with someone that you can not figure out? Putting these two together, somehow makes me feel that you are actually fearful of something.
This fear, is something that you perhaps don´t know about, unless you try to understand yourself and “erradicate” it.
Every action is significant as scorpio has this wonderful ability to feel.
So, this is like the ocean….you don´t really “see” what is going on, underneath your own actions, thoughts, and choices, where all of your fears and more negative emotions lie.
The mixed messages that you are receiving, is because scorpio usually does.
So, even the good that we perceive we do, may be perceived as “dark” for scorpio, based on the fact that it is STILL being done on some sort of fear.
You have to start working on clearing away your “negative” intentions, as they will surely be felt that way to scorpio, based on what you don´t know and fear when you don´t have control of the situation.
If he is evolved and understanding, he will help you see these things about yourself. Or perhaps he will also let you know that you are “on your own” and have to be a bit more independent, as the co-dependancy (attachment requires that you have someone else “depend” on you) that you are beginning to show, will also be felt along the lines of fear or negativity.
For me, I feel that you have to be aware of these messages that he is sending you, as usually they are conflictive. One part speaks to your ego and it seems that the other part speaks to your soul. It is actually a beautiful and complete description of who they are and the fact that most of them CONSCIOUSLY choose between soul and ego. I love that about them…
Sooooo….if you are choosing “soul” then expect the abyss and feel your own darkness. Try to keep your heart open and feel love as much as possible. Because as much as most people will think badly about this whole MIA thing, serious love, is actually serious business. It means completion of our self, and our chioces at all times as we begin to close up wounds through the jioining of “opppsites”. i.e. being able to love yourself, ego and soul, with him and without him, in pain and in happiness…etc.
Knowing our fears, means that we are able to FEEL love more.
For those who dare to “go under”….
Be clear on the idea of “wanting” and your desires…and clear your heart and all negativity. Otherwise, you will be trapped in the shadows of your own self. learn to trust your instincts based on love. If scorpio loves you, then he will guide you,lovingly and patiently, more through psychic and emotional connection.
If he does not, then don´t surrender to his energy.
She enters there, based on her pain and suffering. She sees the lack of “soul” in people, and yet she does not run away from this reality. Actually, she embraces it (collective fears and soulessness) and therefore, passes through it. If she did not face it, then the barrier perpetually exists, right? She is trapped in her own fears and insanity, and the surrounding soulessess “wins” this battle.
Who will submit to who and to what? Her perception of being alone with “demonic” forces overpowering her, fills her with the motivation to “go under”….
To her, it is the light that holds the lie, not the dark.
It is important to see that while she is “under”, she is dressed in white…her revelations while “under” . Before entering, she is dressed in “red”….
This is an example of these two worlds that evolved scorpio sees, as it will clearly see or “intinctively react” to “what you want” based on “what you don´t know”…This will leave a person feeling very confused. But it is only based on their own ignorance of themselves and fearful reactions to what they don´t know based on your own “negative intentions”.
And…if they don´t see it, then they will wait until they do. If you are dealing with a scorpio that is not evolved, this will be a “meaningless death” based on the fact that it is a souless and unloving act.
Anyways…scorpio also wants you to “want”, so the idea is not be be a robot…it is a very human and expressive energy based on harsh reality. They want to see the “true” you. Evolved scorpio…give and take, dance the psychic dance of love…for every step of pure love taken, two had to be taken in “death” of ego.
Hi all
Can someone give me advice with my scorpio boyfriend.. we’ve been going out for almost 5 months now..but somehow i just dont understand this guy.. He can be so sweet and all at the same time become so harsh and mean.. he can say the rudest things to me but he says this is just the way he is and he’s just being honest..he explains to me that over the years he’s been cheated on by other women betrayed by old friends and thats why he is the way that he is now.. but i feel like this is so unfair to me is it not? This scorpio guy has an odd way of showing his emotions..it seems like he is never affected by anything..and if i try to test him.. he doesnt budge and it will just backfire towards me..i just really want to know if this man truly cares for me. he tells me and reminds me all the time that he loves me.. but what is true love to a scorpio anyway? he’s protective over me but he can push me away and be so cold at other times..also i wanted to add that our sex life is very awkward its not great at all… i don’t know if this is whats causing the relationship to feel so weird because we dont have chemistry in the bedroom whatsoever..and i thouht scorpios were supposed to be great in bed.. whats going on? please anyone whats the best advice you can share with me.
btw I’am a Leo/virgo
Thank you
Hi Claire,
ok…..”He cares for you.”
Do these words have some magical power over your relationship?
If that is what just you really want to know, then the answer that I just gave to you, might give you a sense of “what is going on” because, what you want to know, won´t solve or change anything Claire.
From reading your comments I just get the feeling of vagueness and unclarity. Like nothing I write will help you WANT to resolve the REAL ISSUE, because there does not seem to be any, mentioned by you. There does not seem to be any give and take and no dance of love…and you are not seeking understanding and growth…nor love.
It feels like a stagnant situation, lacking magic, transformation and the divine…
Thank you Gatubela for your reply..
our relationship is truly lacking of magic and transformation..i also understand what jojo is saying but i don’t want to give up on the relationship just because i dont understand him completely.. i want to understand him i want it to workout.. he’s just making it hard for me to.. by being so secretive and not telling me how he really feels about anything. its frustrating..he’s constantly hot and cold with me and its confusing. he’s always yelling and screaming at me for the smallest things and i find myself just apologizing to him for no reason… he’s also very moody. i’m trying my best to make this workout but i’m not sure what to do anymore..
My advice is to move on. Life is mean to be lived. If you can feel this simple sentence, then maybe you can connect to what I call the most powerful truth of the universe: common sense. If you have felt been loved before, then you common sense should tell you this is a man who knows what love is, how to love, and he is NOT doing it. If you have never felt been loved before, then why are you even where you are? If a man have chosen in his clarity and conscious choice not to love someone anymore, why are you even here anyway? In the world of independent souls, a choice is within, it usually is not effected or caused by what you do, or any other person do in his realty, he comes to war, finds peace, decide his course of living via his own growth and conviction. When he is not making you part of it, YOU will feel it, you feel it because you are here, not with him, and ask questions when he should of already given you the answer to if he is connected to you, loving you, and he is not. Please, do move on, love yourself, nothing you do can change a man, he changes only because he wants to, towards his own clarity which he chose not to share with you in reality. There is nothing you can do about it. There is no message when there is no presence, if there is presence, there is no need for messages, you will have a warm, breathing person standing next to you holding your hand facing it all. NO ONE is there.
So many love in this life is but an empty shell, always open your eyes to where you actually are, be grateful when people actually letting you know the truth, instead of actively fooling you into believe in lies.
I live a life where everything I do on the internet/cell phone is watched, what do I do? Stop living? Live in the self jail of betrayal? Swallowed by anger and hatred? Act certain way or not act a certain way because I am watched? No, life is meant to be lived, even if I have no control over it … clarity is always and can only be, within. A human being is a continuation of his/her past, present, and future. Do not relate to his/her skin color, hair length and trying to decipher message in it. Sounds funny right? then do no relate to his/her memories interests either, in common sense, it makes no sense a person would forget whatever had happened in his/her life and call it a real life. In real life you would always remember that bully in second grade and that fish bone that stuck in your throat, you probably will never like bullies or fish. But it does not have the power over your choices and decision, your life. Your life is not determined by that bully or fish bone. You LIVE.
There was a couple, the woman is a vegetarian, and while they were together, the man has become a vegetarian too, and after they split up, the man remains a vegetarian, people ask: are you still not over her? And he answered: no, it’s over, but I find been a vegetarian suits me. So, find self-love, DO NOT relate to his/her memories, personal habit, interest… relate to his/her choice towards YOU, acts towards YOU, and presence in YOUR LIFE. I will always admire a dedicated and hard- working person, but that doesn’t mean every dedicated, hard-working person is part of my life…That is your answer you have long ago felt but suppressed to accept. DO not relate to your own dreams and illusions, egos and hopes… when these things stand in your way of self-love. We sometimes are our worst enemies.
Heed to your friends, even strangers, not to what they say, but WHY they react. The words are the echoes of the thunder; the thunder is your own well being. People are driven to act when they sense suffering; they react this way not because who and what happen to you, but what you allowed to happen to you: you are in a bad shape in so many ways… This is what essentially what all your friends, strangers, your family with care for you trying to tell you: what is actually happening to YOU, no one in the universe has the power to do this to you but yourself, your own spirit. It is NEVER about him, HE is NOT EVEN THERE, it’s about you. STOP LISTENING to the noise of words, or live in the illusion of messages, START to feel the energy that relates and reacts in this large bowl of energetic life.
HE IS GONE, MOVE ON. Live your life to its fullest.
People do not need to be a monster for you to find a reason to let go, let humans be humans, live your life, love yourself, no one finds joy in constantly having to hurt others to repeat a message that has been delivered long ago. When people fail to step in and take the responsibility of your happiness, find it for yourself.
No one lives to be an angle for someone else, nor do they become a monster for the same reason.
After all, why isn’t silence loud enough?
” If a man have chosen in his clarity and conscious choice not to love someone anymore, why are you even here anyway?”
Actually, that is giving this guy a bouquet of flowers! Because if he were so conscious and clear, she would not be here at all. She would have been clearly told that there was no boyfriend relationship.
Welllll…actually, I would love it if you could answer this question, from your side. Don´t take it personally, take it soulfully and try explore it and expand your mind and consciousness. Really, as jojo mentioned, it is not about him, it is about you! It does seem that love is not “confusion, misunderstanding, feeling unfairly treated due to someone´s past experiences, having the need to test someone, etc.
So, it can hurt a kitty´s ego terribly to face these harsh truthes…..because of what I perceive you have not mentioned in your comments. And where it hurts, is where you have to work on yourself. Find love through pain, and as JoJo has said, “love yourself”. Become stronger through understanding yourself, and not so much as understanding him. This means that you may have to go through a bit of pain…and feel your own negativity. And…get yer paws a bit dirty by facing some rather unpleasant truthes, most likely looked upon by society as taboos or no´s no´s… i.e. ba-a-a-a-d sheep behavior.
The idea is to understand that you have to wake yourself up by FEELING yourself, compassionately while at the same time, trying to understand and KNOW yourself and why you do the things you do. There is no right and wrong in these things…as you only have your truth and the ability to improve and learn, as a way to end this cycle….I know that scorpio is not the best at verbal communication…(hahaha!) but leo is not a stranger to feelings either. But due to the fixity, you may not want to change your current arsenal of feelings…to feeling something that makes you a bit uncomfortable. As comfort is the best numbing substance…
Seems like you have no true desire to use yer fire…
I have been told after being affected by someone to “get on with life”…so hard to do, because in a sense, you are being asked to deny the raw humanity of your very own existence. I mean, even the dead can speak! There is really no growth in “moving on” taken in a literal sense…as you are still left with no truth through facing your own “stagnation” and lies. I mean your own truth, Claire, not his. I know that it may seem a bit strange, but I won´t let go of anything and anyone, until I FEEL this truth ringing through my being. For me, I do not feel that you are in bad shape…because actually, all I have to do is look around and realize, that we all are kind of in “bad shape”…lol…no one is perfect.
And in my case, my past is actually linked to my present and to my future…as I feel it very acutely, through my children, who in a sense, represent something so eternal and beautiful, that time kind of collapses and so does my ego, due to the love I feel for them and felt for them, even before they existed. My zero ego moment, between their life and my death…….made me BE.
So….you seem to have an idea of what love is, through life. But can you fathom what love is, through “death”?
Will you be alright? You did come here for advice, and not to reread this great forum and all of us soulful contributors !!! As each of us are unique, and each scorpio is beautifully unique, your situation may be slightly different.
I should mention that scorpio actually knows how to navegate this abyss, through understanding the truthes held in the nature of being a predator and the weaknessness of prey.
lol.
can you please explain this further i’m not sure i understand it?
Hi Claire,
Not easy to explain…so I hope that you are reading this with a lot of fire in ya, and QUESTIONING everything that I am writing.
First of all, understanding it won´t actually change you, or your relationship. It will come down to the VERB or what you do with your understanding.
TRUE Compassion, tolerance, forgiveness and all of those religious words, ARE the RESULT of being the virtuous predator, not the prey.
In a very core sense, it begins with understanding balance in masculine and feminine energies. If there is no balance, this may lead to co-dependency or addictive behavior, through seeking our counterpart in relationships or leeching energy.
In your particular case, you don´t know how it feels to ultimately NOT BE CONFUSED. Or, you have indicated that you don´t know how to handle yourself when you don´t know if the guy cares about you.
One weakness has lead to another….so scorpio expects that this relationship won´t last long and will plunge into negativity and neurosis, (unless he does with you) as most women do not know the higher truths beyond pain and love.
This is why confusion is considered a result of surrendering to lies (each person is different)…lol…I mean…scorpio just has to kill that. Testing a guy could be considered surrendering to the desire to control and feel safe in a limiting perception and world. It also is overwhelmingly full of other subtle energies….
None of what you have mentioned is “LOVE”.
So, scorpio could extend the invitation of entering “not knowing” and transforming ideas of “eliminating the predator” of lies -stagnant and form, to a predator of truth and love growth and formlessness, and (very important) finding balance between these two.
The reason why prey could be prey (i.e. bunnies …hahaha!) is due to the lack of the true intention or WILLPOWER of getting out of “not knowing”. (Very weak state of being) and therefore choosing to fall into neurosis and “insanity. Another word is “nothingness”. The nothingness is what is left, when confusion is felt and WHAT WE WANT is based on maintaining comfortable. No growth, no change…STAGNANT and DEAD.
So, how do you go past this “nothingness”? You will have to go through the barrier of pain, and using these religious words (the best of God energy out there) to guide you to your own soul, through eliminating negativity. Scorpionic fixity refuses to give up on the basis of “pain” or not knowing, because they believe the impossible – that this does NOT have to be the REALITY that they want to be a part of. Why stay at “nothingness”?
Yeah…those are the words, but I can assure you, that the process is very painful as you feel just how deep these lies really go.
Your comments indicate that you have chosen to understand first…which is nice. For me, it means that scorpio is being nice to you, probably because you want to learn. But you must not take this wonderful energy for granted or feel that it can be controlled. The nature of this energy is to take through desire, or consume. Meaning, Scorpionic energy (and not all scorpios) “takes what it wants”. Therefore, having wants or desires, is a very powerful position for transforming what is “stagnant” IF (extremely important) scorpio wants truth and love as well as you do. As love is is very dynamic energy, what you truly love, will only stand.
Love is the most safest way in understanding these unknowns and getting your paws dirty, within yourself, because it prevents you from sucumbing to your own neurosis. The most important thing, is that you must not EVER fall into self hatred, depression or confusion…as these are indicators of a lack of LOVE for yourself. However, if you enter these states of instability, then you must begin to feel the willpower to get yourself out of it.
Bye Bye ego through pain of facing your lies, and learning those GOD energies of tolerance, compassion, charity and strictness, loving yourself and having the will power to get out of it (the state of being confused). It is a nice combination of both extremes of this energy. And it is a test of your own Light in finding your soul.
So, get to know your addictions. You are “addicted” or co-dependent in a relationship, by the QUALITY and soulessness of your WANTS (I just want to know that he cares) and DESIRES and your own LEVEL of consciousness and awareness of what is REAL – your reality. I mean, you have crystallized on a non transformative WANT. Heartfelt yummyness and lovey dovey energies, is NOT love for scorpio. The SOUL has to be involved in this one. Soul lies beyond ego…
This is what you do not see. You want to feel “unconfused” in order to….do what exactly? Why should anyone give you what you want, when you are not even strong enough to get out of it on your own? Predator can´t give into the prey i.e. a weaker state of “nothingness” and not being.
Being confused and seeking love and understanding, without striving to first see the truth in yourself, which is in fact, ,smacking scorpio in the face, makes you “prey”.
Going through this and seeing it to the end (from heaven to hell) faces you with the very best you can be, and the very worse…and the ability to feel true compassion, love and beauty.
Oh…by the way, a true predator understands the higher truths in true power.
She rides horses, talks with flamengos…sees a whole bunch of birds…she is in the desert, in the darkness and then the eagle comes to her..
2:41 in the video…A beautiful, majestic and divine moment….makes my heart stop a bit….
Im a cancerian women and I am in a 12 year old relationship with a scorpio men. I’ve endured tough times trying to understand him and surpass time when he needs personal space. It’s been a very hard relationship. Very confusing too. When we are together, he makes me feel like we’re soulmates. But when he leaves he can go missing for some days. I feel like I push and pull this boat on my own. Recently I told him that’s been quiet a while already being on a boyfriend type relationship. He lives by himself and I don’t see sign of that changing. When I spoke to him recently to end the relationship he text me saying I love to be with you. But that’s it! I then took opportunity to tell him I can’t hold on any longer in a relationship where it seems it will never formalize into anything bigger and he should consider marriage or moving in together at least. He didn’t say anything although he will now call me frequently and see me more often 3 times a week instead of 1x a week now for the past 12 years. Now I am more than drained, I can’t seem to manage without him. I would love for him to decide already. Most of the times he is not with me but he won’t let me go. I love him so much that it hurts me going through all of this. But a side of me wish I can move on although deep down I can’t give up. I’ve endured lots of obstacles and hard times with him and for us altogether. That I feel that I might be close to the finish line. Though I keep asking myself, “how much longer”? Please give me advice as I am loosing focus in thinking rational.
Hi Sandra.
I feel like I have to disagree with Inessology and Gatubela a bit.
They both make some good points but, 12 years says a lot more than some one-sided heartache. Why would he keep going this long?? Perhaps he is still a little unsure of himself, but I do not believe for one second that he would keep it going for 12 years, if he did not truly care for you. Maybe something happened in the past that has him scared of fully committing. Ask him.
It sounds like it is already over but…
The only thing I can suggest is, confront him face-to-face. Not via txt.
Not over dinner or anything. Show him you are serious. Meet at a quiet park or something where you can speak freely. Do NOT invite him over to talk and do NOT go to his place to talk (I don’t think he would take you seriously). Show him that it is basically over and he seriously needs to “man up” while his last chance is still there.
Above ALL…do NOT be emotional.
If he isn’t sure or gives you the same old line, in person, end it for good. You will save yourself a lot of hassle. If that happens, clearly he has not figured himself out.
It really sounds like he loves you for you, in my opinion.
Hope this gets to you before it’s over.
Good luck.
Hi Alive Mind…(cute picture)
Since we are talking about scorpio, I feel that death is actually something that has to be brought up. There is simply no casual way to do it…lol.
Death means that we are able to loose our “minds” but not our soul consciousness. They are separate. Death truly does not seek our minds and bodies – nor will it be interested in whether there is a house, car, or the current ideas that society places on “an existing relationship”.
Asking Mr. Scorpio to man up, is like saying “kill my mind….” Sure…he will “man up”, but it won´t be according to your control mechanisms. hahaha! I am feeling major destruction and chaos, if you really want to tweak his “deathliness”.
If he feels that he has access to his beloved´s bunny and soul energies, then he may be just fine with the relationship, as he will feel truly loved, as these energies are self sustaining and eternal. It is like feeling a nuclear reactor within your soul. So…why do anything that will destroy all of that soul work?
But in the case of Sandra, does this exist within her relationship? That is what we don´t know.
The idea is that you may not have his gifts and want to feel what he feels too? Well…that is a different story, as love is a dance between two and not one person. The fact that we can´t perceive it, does not necessarily mean that it does not exist within the relationship.
So, maybe you can ask him to give you an invite in his world….and heart….
We can strive to be soulfully aware that our bodies and minds, are separate from an energy that is actually “beyond it”. We won´t feel that until our hearts are activated and can sustain this ability to “surrender”.
If we can´t surrender, we won´t be able to “see” any deeper truths.
As you feel that you have an alive mind, then you surely understand what it took to open it. Can you tell me if it was by following instructions or well intended advice? If you are anything like me, it was by constantly working on its limitations, through striving to know yourself and actively engaging yourself 150% (since it is soulful, then there are no %´s – just the idea of infinite abundance) to life circumstances.
The mind is polar and will always offer chioces and “emotional resonating temptations” between one thing or another, because it will not perceive the “unity” of Love. Because by saying “don´t be emotional” it is like inviting her to deny those 12 years of “who she is” and the chioces that she did make.
That is why it is important for her to know herself.
Being emotional is inviting him to take advantage.
Hi Alivelymind,
How is being emotional inviting someone to take advantage?
How can you transform this kind of dynamic, even within yourself, if you don´t feel your own emotions or FEEL taken advantage of?
If we don´t have emotions, we won´t care if we are being taken advantage of either…we won´t care.
Sandra my dear girl….. Twelve years? No, TWELVE YEARS!??? At that rate you two might just make it to the next millenium. if you look inside yourself, REALLY look and ask… does he see you as his most beautiful, treasured, loved woman, the one he will never part with? Because anything less makes this a casual relationship in his eyes. With NO FUTURE. Loving to be with someone is not the same as loving someone, I hope you can see that.
“it will never formalize into anything bigger ” You know it already. It feels like you are holding on to the illusion of it all. You don’t need to fight for this relationship or him – there is nothing to fight for, from what you wrote. When you said you want to end this – FOLLOW IT THROUGH, anything less is giving in to your exhausted emotional state… and sending him a signal that you are simply too weak. Scorpio men will not accept emotional weakness.
Sandra…. He doesn’t see you as his ‘forever’. I am sorry. Save your beautiful self and walk away in strength. It’s better than having another ‘twelve years’. Live your life, girl, outside of the illusion of having a relationship with someone who doesn’t love you.
Hi Sandra,
Not an easy thing to answer. The reason why is actually based on perspective and intention.
In the end, however, you have to feel your own instincts and by so doing, you will gain the insight you need to make the right decision…or rather, feel it.
First of all, obstacles in a relationship are perceived as you fighting for the relationship, but that onus is not on him or the relationship. Why project “these obstacles” and correlate them with “your desire to be together”? Are all obstacles in your life related to wanting to or insisting on transformation or change?
Scorpio will opt for the position of transformation – either his own or yours. If things are stagnant from your point of view, then it is where you have to dig deeper within yourself. It will require honesty here…and probably a nice dose of conflict.
Sometimes it is just energy and how you deal with it. It seems like you lack the tools as you are now feeling drained and desperately feeling that you can´t manage without him. That is a strange paradox….because you are clinging to your own fears of him not being there or him leaving you. So, what does he represent to you? Looked upon from this perspective, it seems that you do not see his “soul” – but just your needs and satisfaction of them, in him.
The other scenario requires you to be very honest with yourself, if you were actually given “what you wanted”. Meaning, when we want something, we loose the capacity to truly SEE and FEEL the other person, because WANTING is a dualistic illusion. It requires control or power mechanisms to enter the relationship. He instinctively won´t “lower” his masculine ideas and light, to anything “less” . And if anything “more” exists, controlling and dualism would have disappeared already.
I know that it would be very normal for two people to be together, if there were some sort of co-dependancy issues going on. But I would like to know…”What will happen to the relationship if you get married and or live together and get “more committed”? Is he sexually loyal to you? He may feel that both of you have different ideas of committment.
Trying to erradicate co-dependancy in all levels of ourselves means a new paradigm of what a relationship is and invites a transformative opening of our minds, hearts and sould.
“invites a transformative opening of our minds, hearts and souls”
was the correct thing I wanted to say…..
So, in the absence of knowing him soulfully and personally, you are forced to work on yourself and FEEL how it is, to enter your abyss of “who you are when you don´t get what you want”….
So, connecting with love in yourself, and try to understand what “bigger” means to him could be very important in finding pathways of transformation.
Can someone please help me…………. I have had a scorpio male in my life for over 6 months now and to say they run hot and cold would definitely be mild in my case. He has the complexity of a bad boy and scorpio wrapped up in one person and just when we seem to take two steps forward I end up 5 steps back and more cautious than ever with him. He is the life of the party no matter where we go he is always open and friendly with anyone and it only furthers the insecure feelings I have with him because as the primary blog has correctly stated he is definitely popular with the ladies. I guess the question I am hoping that someone that has ever had a long term relationship with a scorpio male is able to answer for me is can they be happy with just being the center of attention for one special person in their life or does it always end up with mr popularity?
and I guess I forgot to mention I am older than him about 12 years and cancer is my sign……………
Hi Justme,
I feel that Mr. Scorpio is missing from your question. Any answer that we might give, wont magically change the deeper issue in your relationship.
It won´t heal you, or erase insecurities….
So, what is missing “IN YOU?”…(not your relationship), that his popularity affects you so much? Try to understand that and see if you can further intimacy through truthful vias and not lying to yourself.
Justme… maybe you can digest these goodies in your belly.
A man striving for integrity, for self-discipline, with heart and humor exists here on earth to seek and know his true soul purpose. He is here to become his deepest direction in life without the consent of any woman or distraction. No matter how sexy or strong and smart she is… he should never compromise his life ultimate purpose over her needs for approval. Because if there is Trust, there need not be the insecurity for approval. Values and boundaries between each other need to be shared constantly
Why should he focus on his ultimate purpose?
Well all women are pure energy incarnate (spirit). Women are the natural love embodiment even when they are frightened and abused by ignorant men. Women are fluid and receptive and gentle on a much deeper level than guys. Why? Because love is intrinsic, like breathing, in a woman’s nature forever.
Men’s intrinsic nature in comparison, that is quality males, have the nature of DIRECTION or MISSION aside from loving woman and family. Which means the ancient nature of man was designed to love a woman… but never at the cost of his ultimate purpose.
From his core, he consciously CHOOSES life direction… that’s if he ever does find a purpose… which is a naturally A MORE IMPORTANT CHOICE, above the choices to devote all his (seed) energy and time with the woman he loves.
So when I see males soaking up their time chasing women for sex and social status, and plodding through a meaningless existence in their career their entire physical life… I see a huge cause for why women are not satisfied and frustrated in relationships. The woman commonly has to kick the male partner in the backside everyday to get him to FIND HIS TRUE PURPOSE… beyond the agreeing with her demands and complaints.
So to answer your question Justme….
Let him have his popularity with women. Let him BE who he is. When you’re together in private you need to create more open communication that can help you know if you trust him, and if he genuinely does trust you.
Your questions to yourself are the problem here.
If you value the relationship itself and feel loved- Forget the actual guy… and focus on the feeling OF RELATING. What does the relating mean to you? .. Do you see? What does THE RELATING tell you when you’re with him personally? Forget the socially world buzzing around you. Can you trust his desire to only be with you when it counts?… after the parties or gatherings are over?
Building trust and respect fore each other means you both have to earn it. You both can’t just expect trust. That’s the illusion of projection I talked about on the previous post. Don’t ‘project’ what you want to happen if you feel insecure. Instead… Ask questions, Listen…and Perceive the relating HAPPENING in the moment between you. Detach your worries and insecurities of what he thinks and just listen to what he says from those above questions. Then from what he says, always feel strong to ask— WHAT HE MEANS.
A trustworthy relationship takes time, internal strength and a lot of observation. Loving the man means loving HIS CHOICES and HIS BEHAVIOR BACKING-UP THOSE CHOICES. Don’t focus on your fear of not having control (which is what you’re feeling when other women have an interest in him). Your relating ability in the relationship is what matters. Observe the relating you feel for yourself, and then push through that imagined fear.
Ask and you shall receive.
That does not mean what you receive is painless for your ego security.
This statement goes for all people ,guy and girl.
Well in the spirit of all this bunny brazenness… I say put down the boxing gloves and grin for all that is unknown in you, ladies.
This is a lot to ask a Persephone, I know. Feeling vulnerable and moist is not familiar in your human world considering all the blithering neanderthal males out there coddling your cosmetic ego for social/sexual approval. That dynamic right there is the end of the beginning. Just feel back to your past subjective fantasy. How did that actual experience turn out?
So when (or If… ever) the feeling of your safe little world pops, you need only silence the confusion in that pretty little head and heart and welcome the feeling energy of Dark/Shiva/Destructive/Sexual/Masculine– Awareness… Let it enter you…. and you will just… know.
But you have to LET IT IN. As does he. A mutual ego surrender. A surrender of the will. A devotion for absolute integrity and openness and faith in the exchange. That’s the human quandary. If he could only be sensitive AND STRONG enough IN his demonstration of his own masculine energy to show you that universe. No wonder life and love is elusive for a scared damsel.
We are the actual creation of our projections in this world of people. And we are the response to their myths. We buy into the lie of whatever is unfolding. Nothing is probed, no comprehension of realness and intent of love is understood. Only the need to protect the ego.
The key is to understand the meanings, the true intentions, the actual capacity of one’s inner-self in connection with a power immensely greater than the little comforting world which keeps us alive on a material level, amid the FACES of personality PROJECTED in/at you and in/at others. What does your human interactions mean IN THE PRESENT MOMENT, every moment with people? These are questions only a bold conscious mind/heart can feel in the truth of the subconscious unknown. That vulnerability is where all is hidden and unsaid. And yet to be manifested into the awakened state. The Shiva Masculine.
Decipher the energy you feel in the moment ladies, objective of the pull you may intensely feel in any attraction. Give your heart plenty of space and time to feel the truth of the relating happening IN YOU. No…. Not thinking what he thinks. Forget the superficial needs for approval. What does the other truly value and need to feel safe, exemplified by his/her character and vision of life? Is that exchange of energy producing IN YOU a feeling of lack in him/her? Or is that energy producing IN YOU a feeling of empowerment and internal independence by him/her?
Not easy questions huh? They don’t teach you this stuff in college or at book club.
Two people who reflect halves of each other, through their distorted unconscious projections, their lower animal desires … are not in love with the present. Yes the present. I didn’t say the person. They are in love with a set of mental assumptions and biases projected onto the other. Superficial projections and biases. This friends, is the lie of the conformed social world.
Objective understanding is key. Especially during the rape of your known socially comfortable inner world.
Surrender.
To the right man………….. if he exists.
Hahahaha.
“…their lower animal desires … are not in love with the present. Yes the present. I didn’t say the person.”
The “present” is actually a verb tense in english. In english grammar, the present tense, is a STATE of being or a state of activity. It actually goes over a long period of time, and has the potential to perdure.
“I run. I eat. I love…”
It contemplates the past, present and future, or perhaps even infinity (?) if you really look at it.
It is not always referred to as what you are doing at the moment.
What you are doing (I am writing…) is not your “present” – What you are doing, most of the time, is very subjective and “KNOWN” to you.
So feeling the present is actually the sensation of feeling who you were, are and will be, as we begin to unravel parts of ourselves, through facing what blocks us from feeling.
If you connect it with your reality, you will feel huge amounts of conflict and conditional restrictions.
I love…but not all the time…
It feels like you have to choose, as conflicts that are unresolved, won´t disappear. Dualism comes up and a winner and a looser emerges. lol
“That vulnerability is where all is hidden and unsaid. And yet to be manifested into the awakened state.”
The keys to a deeper state of being and wisdom, through surrender….
I feel the integrity of honesty calls upon me to say something, I end up wrote it but couldn’t say it, there are certain things I can say. I can say I do not play anyone’s games, I don’t relate to their acts as a result of their choices in how to face themselves and others. So the truth is I have not called, met, contacted, emailed, talk to, speak with anyone for a very very long time. There is no “relationship” of any sort, I cannot take responsibility in how people read into what I read, buy, visit on the internet as they want to, and react to it therefore become part of the game that is their life. I am not committed to anyone at my present on any emotional level. This is an iron fortress at current moment impenetrable meaning I am unable to break out from as well. Pluto, I like you very much, in fact I admire you in the way I never admired any man I have ever met so far in my life, I want to tell you to take a break from it all, enjoy the joy of being one with the Martian earth brings you, enjoy the wide open sky, just fly in total freedom without what tries to pull you down in here. I have this wish for you, joy and freedom, you know that picture: the eagle spread his wings as far as he can reach, just gild in the wide span of serenity and stillness, joy and freedom.
I have a very long journey ahead of me, one I have chosen to walk in silence and solitude. sometimes I feel like a traveler heading for the Sahara desert, at the end of the journey, I will either end up a different person, or simply dead. this image actually brought a broad smile on my face, not just a grin.
Hi JoJo,
The desert is an interesting abyss….
http://www.google.cl/imgres?q=desert&start=188&um=1&hl=es&rlz=1C1CHRG_enCL465CL467&biw=1197&bih=558&addh=36&tbm=isch&tbnid=3Ffp_eVilnhHsM:&imgrefurl=http://theinnovatives.wordpress.com/2010/05/09/flower-in-the-desert/&docid=_qtSlG3Tmxxb8M&imgurl=http://theinnovatives.files.wordpress.com/2010/05/desert2.jpg&w=750&h=480&ei=V14cUOHoLaSV0QHj0oCgAg&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=875&vpy=139&dur=680&hovh=180&hovw=281&tx=143&ty=88&sig=111488785453016819167&page=16&tbnh=163&tbnw=231&ndsp=12&ved=1t:429,r:3,s:188,i:15
(yikes…that´s a long link thingy)
Just me,
Yes, Pluto is dead on target about your ability in relating, your ability to ask questions, and your ability to take the answer in honesty and directness… to face the truth in your dynamics. More importantly, DO YOU WANT THE ANSWER? I personally are turned off by the acts of people’s agendas and games, turned off is a understatement, in fact there is a fire burning in me almost every time I witness it, I am the incarnation of justice so I couldn’t help it to unearth agendas, act to right the wrongs, WHEN I feel it is called for. and I see the motivation of people’s actions, and I protect the innocent, it matters less if these protections are needed, it matters more what a person DOES when acts are called for. Healing happens only when truth is offered, and via our inevitable conflict in relating with others we arrive at the point of openness and understanding, only at that point what we say is REAL and POWERFUL in healing, in change, in everything that is worth exchange and relating. The innocence of kindness do not wish to abuse anyone’s vulnerability and weakness, even the gamers and manipulators, at the cost of her own silence, no matter what is said about her, IF that agenda is aimed only at her, if that silence is a chance for gamers in life to realize games never going to work, otherwise, the warrior is awakened and called upon to act. But DO YOU WANT TO merely provoke interaction? is it EVEN meaningful in ANY WAY? is it MORE meaningful than silence, and truth? If you SEEK meaning, help is plenty here on this form, as we fought our own inner battles, to arrive at compassion for human condition when truth is laid in the open.
Pluto,
Thank you for demonstrating the verb of “the whole of us is greater than the sum of our parts” of spirit, soul, and purpose. I feel it is life’s gift for me to witness the act of a man’s higher purpose, when my life experience with men have turned me off, scared, and bitter towards men’s aggression and insecurities, that I have in the real sense, lost faith and trust in men… I trust them in distance and humanity, but not with my life and my soul. And here you are, showing me otherwise. I apologize for asking you to turn away from what you would never shy away from, even with good intentions and a protective urge, I was limited to my own vision of act, and did not plugging in the greater purpose. I love what you said about a man is born to love/protect, but never at the cost of his higher purpose and meaning. To me, a woman is born with the purpose of create and nurture life, but never at the cost of her compassion and love. There is no strength in a man’s love if he is without purpose, there is no substance in a woman’s purpose, if she is without love. I have in my own experience do not WANT TO LOVE anyone anymore, at least not now, yet I do LOVE, it is born in me, something I cannot give up, or throw away. same with trust, I do NOT WANT TO TRUST men, yet I do trust, it is born in me at the forever innocent part, where I have no real cruelty toward anyone, including myself. So what you asked Justme of what she “Value”, is something I ask my self too, what do I VALUE? I value the part of me that is greater than the sum of my parts, my soul: my spirit, my compassion. and I want to be inspired, rather than turning away, from the acts of compassion, and meaningfulness.
There are many situations in which truth won´t be offered. It will all be lies and illusions, including your own.
A co-dependent need for “Truth” for most people, will block out manipulative wants and desires, while providing the wall they will stubbornly ignore not destroying in order to get out of the comfort zone, while searching for the next control mechanism to apply.
Healing, when truth, openess and love is not offered, comes with the will and intention to do so. In the absence of the truth from others, you will find your own through facing your darkness.
I have written these a while back, but decide the benefit would not out weight the set back if I were to break my silence, even in the spirit of speak what I SEE. There is nothing in this world we truly couldn’t “GIVE UP”, when we feel that way, it often has an origin and deeper motivation, our healing will not begin if we don’t dig deep enough to open it up. So here it goes:
I want to tell three stories. The first story I have told others before, it’s a story of a boat. The story goes where a man was standing on a roof in a flood, since he was a deeply devoted man, he prays to God for his salvation. A neighbor came with their roll boat, ask him to get on, and he refused, he said, I am waiting for my God to save me. A police boat came by, ask him to get on, and he refused, he was waiting for God’s miracles.
Eventually he died, he stand in front of God in heaven and asked why you never saved me when I was so devoted to you.
God said: I have sent you two boats, what are you waiting for?
This story was used and told by others in many ways, a joke, a propaganda. I have used this story to ask someone this question: how do the people on the boat know if they were called upon fate to answer a calling? And in asking that question I have also said: the boat’s mission ends when the people in it have reached land or safety, it was never meant to carry the passenger away indefinitely.
Today I am retelling this story with different questions in heart: how do you even know you are in the flood when you can’t see and feel the muddy water? And what do you do when your feet reaches land? What is your duty and journey as a human being, to prepare yourself for floods, do you start to build your own boat, so you can save yourself and mayhap be ready to lend that hand to someone else on roof tops, or do you forever stuck in the state of the man on the roof, waiting, or forever stuck in your memories of a journey on the boat ride.
Flood, rescues, memories, they were never meant to last beyond the life span of its nature, but life is, life is meant to be continued lived, with all that are inside of us. With change.
The second story is a much harsher one, it’s a real life story I read from somewhere while I was fighting alongside with the butcher and his friends. There was a reporter, he was assigned to write about people with different sexual orientations, one of his subject was a young man in his 20s, the young man, let’s call him Amy, Amy had always felt he should be a woman, he feels he was born in a wrong body. He told the reporter he would do anything to have a sex change operations, in this way, he feel his life would finally line up with who she is, and he would be able to walk out from the pain of living in the wrong body. He didn’t have money or support from his loved ones to do this, but HE WILL DO IT, for ANY PRICE. The reporter finished his article, I read it, it didn’t really register much in me except an article about transsexual people who are pretty far from my reality. Sometimes later, I forgot if it was a year or more, I was in my own deep pain of self-confrontation, I have lost track of time and much more, one day I came across the same reporter’s article again, I didn’t know it was the same reporter until I read in his article Amy and his story, it was a follow up, I remembered that distant human being, and as the article goes on, it really shook me, Amy had killed himself. Not because he can’t endure the pain of not be able to become who he wanted to be, he killed himself because after the first article went public, he was able, from his own work, and support from strangers who sympathize with his story, to have the operation done very successfully. He have gotten what he wanted, what he dreamed of since he became aware of his gender identity as a young boy. Yet, his dream is not what he dreamed at all, nothing was really FIXED, he didn’t feel a different person the day he was a man, or the day he become the woman. His pain was never nested on his body parts. So he killed himself, and in his last words he just left this question: I don’t know what life is worth living for anymore.
This story has never left me since I read it, on my own journey of becoming me, sometimes I would think of Amy, and I ask myself if I can’t find in myself the sustainable things, RIGHT NOW, no matter what my situation is, I will never be able to find real happiness: sustainable strength, peace, and happiness, with or without anyone.
So my question for the second story is: Are you living now? Or are you waiting for life to happen?
It had already happened, you are living IN it.
We are, ultimately, without exception, the creator of our own fate.
The third story is one I saw from one of the TV series I occasionally watch. It was about a young man, he didn’t have a happy childhood and growing up with the responsibilities of taking care of a mentally disabled father. So one day in pursuit of his own happiness, he had neglected his responsibility of watching over his father the way he used to, so his father got into an accident, and was in operation in critical condition. As the drama of TV series goes, the drama has to happen on his day of an important event which could give him the opportunity to start a career he always wanted. He sat outside of the operation room and basically just soaked in his guilt and despair and not lifting a finger to handle the situation. His best friend, seeing he was not doing anything about it, called the girl with whom he was pursuing his happiness with, and she came to the hospital and told him that what he truly wished for is for his father to die. He was vivid, she said: if you wanted your father to live, then why are you behaving as if he has already died? Why aren’t you building a life for the both of you anymore, why aren’t you LIVE as if he WILL LIVE? Instead sitting here, and waiting for his death? So you can finally give up on your fight? The story itself is a story of story lines, but that few sentence touched me somewhere very deep.
I have seen this in life, I have witnessed people in life, putting every hope and resources and fight, into one thing, hoping for a single event to happen, as if once that single event happened, so will everything they have ever wished for happen, so will everything ever was wrong in their life be fixed, so will events from there on after, be happening the way they should and suppose to happen toward: happiness. No, when we hate our lives to the degree that we MUST get out of it, the only way to truly get out it is to look at it in its face and smash it to pieces. ONLY by doing this, you will be free, with CONFIDENCE and without FEAR. Anyone, anything is just going to substitute your old fear to the new one; yes, your new fear of losing your salvation.
We have so much strength in trying to escaping our fear, we perform deeds in epic scale, we have all these strength and determination and drive in us, doing what? In my days of fighting alongside with the Butcher and his friends, one of them has said something to the effect “building an iron castle to protect the mouse”. May be in recognizing our ability of building iron castles, the mouse would cease to be important. ONLY if we can see this in ourselves, only if we can start loving ourselves, then we become strong, then what was once mountain would become hills, what was so important in our fear of losing it would become optional, then we will be free. Free from enslavement of ourselves and others, and in his heart and soul, only a free man makes choices, a slave acts on his survival.
How is the motivation and drive to love ourselves came about? I don’t know, but I do know without making a choice to focus on “ME”, it will never come about.
Motivation and drive to love ourselves….so beautiful.
It is all half way done, until we face our darkness. We will not have any capacity to understand love through the TRUTH in ourselves, and acquire deeper understanding of what “compassion” or “forgiveness” really means on deeper levels. Nor will we be able to make the jump from “me” to “we”.
We are actually always motivated to subjectively love ourselves and we will defend our self love point of views quite emphatically! lol
“A slave acts on his survival”….
A master will not learn how to be a master, without truly understanding its oppposite. But a master of what?
Me: Ourselves? Our cosmos?
We: soulful knowledge? The cosmos?
Pluto,
I just realized something, you weren’t talking about me trying to protect you from things you can handle yourself and your dedication in healing anyone who needs the healing regardless of who they are, you were talking about my insecurities of facing your willingness to heal women everywhere on this form…
I had assumed you already know, maybe you didn’t, there hasn’t really been many actual “ladies” on the form for a long time now, and since we are on the subject, may as well talk about it. I’ve encountered certain things before, much worse case I may add, but to show you how I feel about it, I’ll tell you what I told the other guy in a nut shell, please forgave the language, and proceed with caution, because I did and do feel VERY strongly about it:
I can certainly respect and understand anyone’s right to choose and compare their interests and what have you as a person’s due right of choice and life style, I’m all pro choice on this. But to have your actual dick inside her, and her feeling/believing that pleasure of that actual fuck, all the while you were TELLING ME you were THINKING of ME while the actual fuck is going on? WTF, how. fucking. insulting. To me that’s down right whoring. Who do you think I am? And who do you think you are? Hey, I really prefer to stay out your fucking bedroom during all this, but what? Do you actually EXPECT me to gain FEELINGS for you while watching this going on? are you out of your freaking mind? How fucking blind CAN you BE?
Well, that pretty much sums up how I feel about it, I know, it’s quite colorful, but if that’s how I feel, that’s how I feel. But to come back to the present, on a personal level, I have stayed out people’s bedroom and didn’t read much of what’s going on except maybe some post here and there, it’s really none of my business, I am actually not there, that people have the total freedom to live out their life and choice anyway they want to. But if I were to be there, I will stand for non of the actual fucking. I don’t know, I rather believe any woman on this planet, if she were to REALLY have her panties down in the real sense of openness, that openness needed four any real penetration, to have her bedroom door open, in her honest self, she is not LOOKING or ASKING to have only the dick walk through the door, she is LOOKING and ASKING for the man himself, his heart, his soul, his presence to be there along with his dick, and unfortunately his heart and his soul and his presence can’t really be at all places if he is not on cracks. Otherwise woman everywhere may as well to go the full Monty: prostitution, you can have all the dick you want and getting paid at the mean time. So, do man in their brutal honesty and integrity, really BELIEVE all that mind fuck and mind games is actually of purpose of any kind? Is really going to raise her soul? Open her eyes? Widen her heart and consciousness? REALLY? That’s why the author of the road less traveled who is willing to heal to any extent, including having sex with women if he actually believes it would heal them, actually NEVER did. Nothing but brutal self-honesty here. Yeah, the simple and heavy word of “INTEGRITY”.
Back on the objectivity of this subject, so why then do we fool ourselves into believing the opposite? That we are the exception of the rule, that we are the loop hole in common sense? Yes, whenever we start to EXPLAIN to ourselves that we are the EXCEPTION, that we are not the NORM, we are SEEKING to delude ourselves, to mask our need of our own self-confrontation. You see, the exception of anything, is the EXTENSION of the common sense, it is NEVER exist to be against it. The banquet is the artistry of the respect of hunger, the man is compassionate to his woman’s need without the need to MOCK her if he really cares for her… etc. Because you see, we can WALK AWAY in any situation, our maker has given us the gift of FREE WILL, we can exercise it at any time if we chose to. But we don’t chose to, why? because we are lonely, we all have a little dragon name VOID living in everyone of us, who needs to be feed, who drives us to act out its hunger. The universe always fills a void, it provided us with more ingredients than we will ever need to fill that void, it is UP TO US what to fill it with. THAT, inevitably is the act of creating our own fate.
Dragons, like all living things, gets hungry no matter how much you feed it and with what at any given time, it’s delusional to believe it can be content once a single event happens, once a single achievement happens… so LIVING with the void IS our greatest test and inner battle. I have been doing that for a while now, the great call of Sahara for that solitude, your own self as your company, to watch yourself in that destitute unfold, WHO YOU REALL ARE unfold. That dragon, it can be the most cruel yet most honest companion, show you things you would have never find out about yourself if you don’t spend time with it. Bruce Lee had said “ all knowledge, my friend, eventually comes down to SELF knowledge” I have been living that powerful statement.
In facing the honesty that we don’t walk away from people we NEED to feed the void to the point that we can function normally when we don’t have that special someone, what integrity calls for, yes, respect. You respect your prey as the Indians do, our fates are interlinked in the great flow of Cosmo, if we choose this path of living with truth, we watch ourselves unfold, we do not lie nor shy away from the fruit and consequences of our own choices, we respect and know the truest meaning of humility.
Sigh, our dragon can be so hungry that we believe the things we want so badly to be true… how can I forget that? Everything spoke to us, our actions, believes, it tells us WHO we are, self-knowledge. I want this ideological man to be real so badly… I neglect the greater truth of life is imperfections and wounds and scars and growth and…everything…I erase human beings… all knowledge, eventually comes down to SELF knowledge.
Peace.
“the great call of Sahara for that solitude, your own self as your company, to watch yourself in that destitute unfold, WHO YOU REALL ARE unfold”
I do love this comment – again – so beautiful because of its bravery. You have to keep on going until you arrive to the “we” part of the deal, and go past the “me”. Go beyond.
Which is why feeling love is important. This abyss is interesting because we clearly see who we are, and can easily fall into negativity. That is the big illusion as well, because this is not WHO WE ARE SOULFULLY.
Any soulful connection, will be linked with love.
“Dragons, like all living things, gets hungry no matter how much you feed it and with what at any given time,”
Well, for me, it is because dragons like to be comfortable too!
We don´t go beyond our appetites to the “opposite” of dragon. So, maybe we could feel “hunger” and then feel “starvation”…Sounds strong, I know.
Well…if we could connect ourselves to the idea of “flowing” then this is another energetic state of being.
Flowing, is not expecting…and unconditional.
The universe thrives on this energy…by not permitting manifestation (stagnation) through something less than an infinite or objective perspective and chioce of action. Or rather, don´t choose. Just surrender.
Because once we choose, then we loose our vision and start verbing all over the place, based on stagnation and our own will. Feeling this other awareness, permits you to feel, when the chioce is right for ALL, based on something perceived as greater than you – or GOD.
That “zero” moment permits you to obtain this awareness….
There is dark…and then there is light…and then, there is this “awareness” of the secrets of the cosmos. Probably different for everyone.
If we were to be aware of our darkness and light – light in darkness, darkness in light etc., and have these energies BALANCED in both extremes, then awareness helps us loosen our attachment through facing this “truth”.
Another person can not give you this awareness – it has to be sought out. Time and time again, it has been proven, that no one goes out of their comfort zone, unless necessary.
.
…” So, do man in their brutal honesty and integrity, really BELIEVE all that mind fuck and mind games is actually of purpose of any kind? Is really going to raise her soul? Open her eyes? Widen her heart and consciousness? REALLY? …”
Hi JoJo,
I have never suggested that men are the ideal of what– I am. The truth is most males are clueless about “brutal honesty and integrity” in their behavior. They mostly DON’T CARE about integrity for many reasons and many layers of truth/existence BURIED in the psyche of the collective mind. The superficial reality out there… as I have pointed out a thousand times doesn’t seek in terms of revealing itself through existential questions and answers. Reading books may tell mainstream seekers what life means… but that knowledge is futile and dogmatic IF MEN FAIL TO GROW GREATER — in their BEINGNESS. Not their ambition. Not their toys. Not their image.
Again… everything in our past, present and future is about choice. It’s about being awake to greater possibility in our current perception of a vast power greater than our own tiny egotistical self-importance. My ultimate purpose… is about growing or evolving or gaining powerful self-knowledge. Those are virtue’s I strive toward every moment. It is a state of being, in a constant state of Becoming. Shedding old skins of the psyche and past attachments which held me back. Shedding skins TO GRANT FURTHER MEANING. Meaning which provokes and manifests better resources than the old self could fathom or know. Dudes are dudes. They unconsciously follow the sex desire, they weakly accept the status quo in a material seeking quest only. They strive for social conditioning social inclusion just to remain comfortable.
There’s a million threads in what I have shared which connect to a whole vision. I can’t tell you how to connect the dots. Because that would be like me trying to explain the infinite in man, woman, child and world.
My posts are about my journey only. They’re what I see through that consciousness. Part of my infinite journey is learned/received from understanding the STAGNATION or MEANINGLESSNESS of others lives (especially males as they don’t naturally understand love as do women) which is what you see (if you look) in the real world behavior of men, their sexual immaturity/insecurity, their blindness to the intangible meanings of circumstance, their simple and point blank lack of purpose.
“…all knowledge, eventually comes down to SELF knowledge…”
Yes precisely. Self-knowledge is actually very Occult in my world. You can’t touch it or fix it. You can only BE IT. Self-Awakenings happen to me because I (have) naturally created destruction before rebuilding in Light.
When or if ever we (males) seek… the challenge then is to understand what every experience means through challenge. But if we are not alive to choose our destiny, we will never know our highest potential.
Once again… this is MY soul path. You’ve been discerning my potential. Because the inner always equals the outer in people. I have been sharing me. Not my expectancy for everyone else.
Absolutely everything… all circumstances, are about how we Interpret and Respond to people’s energy, those illusion manifest in the outside world. Do we “choose” to be a part of their world?..i.e form a relationship?… do activities together?… You see… whoever we “give meaning” to in our lives… humans naturally believe that those projections with the other person are “real”…. when the reality is… these people “get hurt” once the divine truth reveals itself in the subconsciously chosen relationship.
So that “choice” (yes even though it’s a blind choice) leads people down the garden path of illusion. Which again comes back to my long explanations about VICARIOUS INFLUENCE seeding multiple false realities between human being. Those realities are not false to those people, again why?… because their feeling and perception has “bought into” the myth. Their lie is now manifested as true. You see?
To “see” those manifestations objectively, you first need to truly your specific role or responsibility in scheme of the entire myths “believed” and acted upon in the outside world.
The outside JoJo, should never be your reality. The inner, is where God (you) exist.
Can you see that view objectively?
Wow, actually been talked to, looked square in the eyes with directness and substance…how fucking shocking, it had actually made me cry uncontrollably, I didn’t even know they were pooling inside, waiting to come out…for the basterds of the world.
Pluto… thank you for acknowledging that from reading what I wrote, you UNDERSTOOD. It doesn’t really matter what was said, the act itself had opened deep wounds I didn’t really know I had, so the healing can begin. I really don’t want to talk to you right now, I didn’t know these cuts run this deep, I have to come to peace with certain things, let the soul cleanse the resentment. But THANK YOU. You ARE the better man…I feel loved and respected…for this honor, somewhere deep inside of me I love and will always love you for restoring some of that total faith I have lost in men…Pluto…thank you.
I’ve always respected you JoJo.
My destructive nature and dominance (because it’s necessary in the moment) has never meant that I did not genuinely care for you. Because I have known your deeper psyche (beyond personality) from the beginning when reading your mind here on the forum. Your desire and motivation is innocent and ambivalent like most females in this world. I see this all the time through social experience in the real world… women by nature flip and feel cranky and broken. They are wonderfully tender women who want to love and trust… but they can’t because the poison of men has robbed them of that spirit. I understand a woman’s plight. I’ve known your innocence does function with a sophisticated puppet agenda to play a game with me or hide the truth as we relate.
My compassion goes out to you and your experiences. I can see that you have blossomed into a loving woman who has found her real-self again. Thank you for trusting me again to reach out and talk. I hope you’re feeling stronger and liberated in your solitude with your being.
Meant to type — “Doesn’t…. function with a puppet agenda”
Hahaha… let the fire works begin when I actually DO read that Aphrodite energy through a woman’s mind manifestation. There’s no way in Pluto’s Kingdom I passively bow down to that bratty front. That woman needs to see in the mirror of what she is not.
It’s as if the dark in me wants to destroy the dark (unconscious) not realized within her.
Why consciously (your dark) destroy the unconscious (her dark)?
By directing… and more specifically controlling my intense will each moment in consciousness. No easy feat, given all the feeble agendas and calculating games I am seeing and feeling through the lens at my personality level.
Self-control and discretion of my willpower, the sexual and psychological evil or good at my disposal is no flighty topic.The essence of self-mastering turbulent and compelling desires and penetrative perceptions in the truth of others and myself is the constant war… or battle I have shared before. These intense energies (desires) trigger and unleash hell through my mind, heart and sexual base of power. Can you imagine an institutionalized mentality… a factual and flat personality having the skill or courage to navigate and handle these overwhelming powers??
This energy happens through me many times a day as it has done my entire life. It’s just that now through intuitive leaps I understand it’s purpose expressed through me. This is my soul’s inevitable path and nature. Women have no idea what psychological dexterity and self-restraint it takes from me to guide this volcano of primal sexual desire and the motivations I constantly receive through another. My willpower is not intellect and it is not rational. My will and harnessed containment is a gut level knowing I feel. Not “think”. Purely instinctual and animal-like. But my personality in this stage of evolution is far from conditioned to please society. How I must BE with complete peace and presence of my own naturally inflicting nature… and to calmly re-direct my tremendous desires for the good of humanity, is nothing people really ever know. Because as I am in this illusory world, I must adapt and feed my belly like any other creature looking to survive.
Much of my nature is hidden, in a casual social context. I show people what I want them to see. It is only during trustworthy relating I share my deeper layers with others. But then… the deeper I go… the more fear they feel in the abyss. Again… it all comes back to mastering the direction of my personality via the power of sexual desire.
If sexual desire was not a powerful manifestation which literally shapes our world folks… could you even begin to conceive marital problems?… Infidelity?… Pornography which sells?… Wars and political power strokes?… and rape and murder… ALL BECAUSE… of mankind’s feeble and weak capacity and repugnant lack of self-mastery?
If you look carefully on T.V, film and through music, you will see that “repugnant” is the norm. Why? Because that myth wants the approval of the masses and the masses are happy to feed that myth among themselves. It’s quite a standard… isn’t it?
My world is not of theirs. Although it could easily be, with the submission of self-deceit and believing that “being” as true.
And why must a Pluto/Mars individual control his inflicting sexual desire and personality out in society?
For one reason only. Love.
If he can impregnate woman and world fully, he knows the power of consequence through every atom of his manner.
Infliction can heal.
But only to those who have mastery of their mind desires.
Which in reality equals…. the very few.
Pluto,
If I were to write a book about my journey, it would be called and the self-discovery and detoxication have to be in the VERB. So here I am, telling you this: you have honored me, acknowledged what need to be acknowledged UNCONDITIONALLY, an act of nobleness; you have ACT upon that acknowledgement by FACING me, an act of bravery. If we live in the moment, what is NOT to like and feel honored, loved when we are respected this way? So my resentments, pain, bitterness… how big can it be? greater than the universe? When I find these moments, I turn on the radio, dance like possessed, well, I’m currently sick, so I turn on the radio and wave my fingers like possessed, I called it self-elevation via shear craziness. Be one with the universe. I don’t always live in this state of elevation, it happens when it’s called upon. Mostly I’m just a normal human being. But somehow I feel this is the way it should be, so we can enjoy the once in a lifetime gift of a human life.
Life sometimes makes us toxic, it’s shocking how fast it can happen, it really doesn’t matter who is the abuser, who is the abused, we are both and the same. So when I was yelled at, threw things at, left on the high way, spit on, screamed upon, I know I’ve done my fair share of abusing, people don’t act this crazy unless they’ve been driven by things in the same toxic nature. I knew this, but the revelation/confrontation came one day, when my son was asking for toys as six year olds does, he wants this and he wants that, I ask him to make up his mind since he only have one chance, you can have anything reasonable, just not everything I told him, so he look at me, and said “I don’t want any toys, I will give you all my toys, the one thing I want the most in the universe is if you and daddy will stop fighting” I don’t know how to tell you how I feel, so I promise him I will try my best not to, I told him will you please forgive me and not feel betrayed if I tell you even if I don’t fight anymore, I am not happy. He said: mama, I already know. Is there a lovelier boy in this world? Then Apollo went overseas for months, one day my son was crying and telling me this: mama, can you stop yelling at me, you are acting like daddy now… I was so shocked at myself, I had to sit down, yes, he was not there, no one is at battle with me, yet I am still this monster under attack. WHY? Then I realized life shape us, who we met. Lived with, had a relationship with, interact with… we don’t realized, yet when we are frustrated, under duress/stress, we act to the closest/familiar action we’ve vividly experienced… so when I see how people act towards me, believed me to be… Pluto, when I see the way you are prepared to handle how you will be treated in the presence of the women/human of your past, I see the shadow of the life you have lived… and it hasn’t been kind… I feel I want to give you a hug, the kind that’s long and silent so I can let go of my own pain too. I’m not a saint, I only feel this way when I am treated with compassion and truth. When I’m lied to or under duress from people’s own blindness, I still want to growl and attack like a lone wolf threatened.
How do I detoxicate when the fact of life is people mostly don’t honor and respect, they don’t even know the origin of their own pain, just driven by it? I don’t really know, but I know on that day I sit on the sofa in shock, I have made a CHOICE I must, it WILL be done one way or the other, if I am the protector of those I LOVE, I MUST protect them from ME. It’s hard, often is after the fact I realize I have act the same way again. I have been drawing strength from the unconditional love of my mom, the innocent love of my son, I have watched, felt, and relearned very slowly how to love again in peace and harmony from them. Yet my greatest test is not living with mommy and bonbons, my greatest test is dragons and monsters live under my skin when they are awakened…in inevitable conflicts, what happens when Apollo gets back? when I can’t be this human being who he think I SHOULD be and that everything IS changing…what then? I really don’t know, but I guess I will find out one way or the other. Something I MUST learn living in a world full of dragons and monsters, along with occasional dark angles.
Aphrodite? dear Pluto, she is a fairy tell, love in the real world begins with a long and painful walk in the Sahara.
**it would be called and the self-discovery and detoxication have to be in the VERB.
something happened with pasting function, some words were eaten up, everything else became a great big link, lol.
what? again? all right, last try, otherwise consider it’s a book with no name, lol.
***a book called “a walk in the Sahara: a journey of self-discovery and detoxication”
there.
Gatubela,
I ask myself why I’m here speaking, I don’t really feel like to, and I don’t really have something meaningful that I feel need to be shared. In the past I just remained silent, but I’m trying to live outside what comes easy, and I do respect you a great deal. So I would like to say this, to me, this is a journey, it’s probably good to hear what might lays ahead or what the destination should be, but it really holds little meaning to me when journeys are meant to be experienced, I’m experiencing mine. It really matters little if I’m right or I’m wrong, I should of turned left or turned right, I felt that meaning when I took that step and then I took the next step… my life is CHANGING, in ways you can’t really imagine when you are NOT me. If I were to be brutally honest, I am not drawn to “opinions”, “agreement”, or “disagreements”, to me I feel bored very soon when we live in “opinions”, I guess some people do feel I’m a strategist or master mind of something, I am intelligent, very much so, and I really don’t feel apologetic for that, it’s me, me not being smart is never going to happen. why would I feel this is something “wrong”? But to use that as an assumption that life therefore is less spiritual or it’s calculative, then you really have no idea who I am. things like chess, mind games bore me to tears, I rather wash dishes, and washing dishes already bore me to tears. If a thousand times I had to chose, a thousand time I would chose to sit in front fireplaces listen to traveler’s tales of their own journey instead engage in battles of opinions, or disgusting mind games. but the sad fact is people don’t really share, they discuss, so that’s how I lived my life in relating with others, arguments and opinions, I’m really sick of it but it seems this shall be a fact of life. I feel bothered when so much energy are spend on “not being wrong”, but I feel the compassion in understanding people really haven’t been forgiven much in life. But please understand this, I have no ill intention towards anyone, if I catch myself act on levels that are manipulative towards my own gain, I stop myself, no question asked.
So Gatubela, if you are interest in my journey, let us share, tell me yours, I could be inspired and captivated, this picture is already infinitely more interesting. but if you are interested in having opinions or giving advices, I am not interested, and I haven’t asked any. Thank you.
Pluto,
Again, thank you for lifting a weight I didn’t know I had on my soul, and the feeling of been understood and respected is incredible. I feel so much… lighter, and at peace with life. so thank you. Things have been happening towards the better in all front of my life, I am grateful. I feel so much more at peace to be open to others now, it’s incredible how much difference a simple act can bring. In the spirit of openness and sharing, I would like to may be speak on the things I have been avoiding in the past, in my own world I call it constructive road blocks, not mud slid, but road blocks none the less. I haven’t really lived much in sexual desires, I have barely ever been kissed, and never really had any sexual life at all, so suppressing sexual desires comes easy to me, I just turn myself off, otherwise I’d already turn into who knows what long ago if I hadn’t learned to do that. I don’t ask for sympathy and fully aware what vultures of life would do with vulnerability like this.
I have made choices in my life to deal with my realities in my own way…whoever I was, I love her too. But I know the undercurrent in that quite suppression. I am aware of it, and feel the pull and call when it’s spoken to… I don’t know what awakening would bring, but I know I want to BE THERE when it happens, my heart, my body, my soul. I have been deprived for so long I feel like I would be cheating myself if I just FILL that void with anything and just because I am hungry. and I KNOW myself, I can’t BE there when I am a married woman, not really, even in my oblivion I know this is not something I can do, and I don’t beat myself up for being me, not anymore. I just can’t cheat a man this way, he will always be in bed with me in my head if I don’t deal with my reality the right (to me), and hard way. commons sense. And in many ways I am dysfunctional, this no light matter, I have to deal with my own demons.
That is another reason why when people play these mind games HERE, it’s so easy to say “NO”, but I didn’t. WHY? when the fact is my presence is behind my road block, not here, what is the integrity in string people along for empty words in that denial? Matters change when these mind games get you involved. In all honesty I am not a fan of pain, if I have to walk through hot coal to get from here to there, I’d find the thickest boots I can wear and get through it. But I don’t doubt my ability and willingness to take off my shoes and walk on it barefoot, I would only do it for love, the kind of love that I would take a bullet for, but that kind of love is built in real intimacy in every way, not in illusion of dreams. So I stay here behind my road blocks to feelings until things are different… you intuition is very right, about where my presence actually are. But as I said to Getubela, I have no ill intentions towards you or anyone, and I am in acceptance of what my action and choices actually mean, and I’m in acceptance of your choice of how to relate to my humanness, I don’t kid myself of what I’m actually doing and find the “right” in it. This is my truth.
If I may, can I ask you something? do you LIKE people? human beings? even with all their faults and “humanness”? this is not a question to seek approval, but rather, curiosity. Hmmm… I just saw your new post, so I ask the question in the curiosity of your natural state, not really the mindfulness of the warrior and his acts of love.
Hi JoJo,
Kitty does as she feels.
But not because of my own desire to give advice or that I feel that i have grrrrreat advice to give.
On a very essential level, I won´t change how I am, unless I am able to perceive it in my soul. So, it actually feels like I am giving and sharing. I was even feeling bouncy and bubbly too!
On retrospect, I often feel that if just one person gave a damn about me, to give honest input, without caring about what I said or how I was, it might have done me good. Something that I could digest…feel..someone who understood…
But it seems to be coming down to how I make you feel and a bit of energy nudging…
Am I missing something? Maybe you could explain it to me – just spit it out…I just don´t see it.
lol…am imagining all of these scorpio readers laughing at the cat.
” Hmmm… I just saw your new post, so I ask the question in the curiosity of your natural state, not really the mindfulness of the warrior and his acts of love.”
Oh but dear JoJo… I AM, the mystic warrior. My personality is not me. Do you understand that? When engaging my personality is A MASK. We all have/wear a mask. The questions are, who the hell are we when all our props and social image are stripped away?
Imagine being the only woman left on this earth, living with one man.
In that circumstance… of your physical reality… do you honestly believe that you would need to work smarter and harder “to make it”… to achieve fame and fortune… to watch Youtube, to act cool and comforted, or to go impulsively shopping for stuff until you go bankrupt… all because you need approval from others?
Think deeply about this. Because in that primal soul reality of living and loving one other human through your relating, there are no other humans in your vision to reflect back upon your ego social approval. There would be no other humans to seek approval from you. Because ego entities, greed and fear would not drive your choices. You would not need the feminine crutches of looking old, or unattractive, or unpopular… because…. there would be no society cultivating impressions in your psyche and ruling your life on subconscious levels. Do you see this example clearly?
So because you and one male live and love together on earth… you are both in each others universe, you are both included and participating in one another’s psychic universe FOREVER. No crutches and no yearnings would EXIST or misguide that soul-love while sharing each others existence. Simply because people would not be around you to suck your godliness and feminine essence. No people could influence your heart and create A SEPARATE ENTITY of ego within you, which YOU WOULD BELIEVE during that creation in that described universe of forever of you and your mate.
So to answers your question. Yes of course I care for people. People who don’t like (or fear) people are actually the ones with no understanding of humans. All those people know is how to fear what they don’t understand. Their experiences have made them fearful and idealistic in that baby souls always try to control their environment (meaning the people around them) in subtle and controlling ways. It is what “a personality” does when it does not understand something around it’s own constructs. It’s own self-defined prison. It tries to control and manipulate subconsciously. Again, because it is afraid.
Fear is a natural energy and response (or equation) of this people universe. Actually all living creatures “respond” and feel the power of fear.
“You would not need the feminine crutches of looking old, or unattractive, or unpopular… because…. there would be no society cultivating impressions in your psyche and ruling your life on subconscious levels”
oh oh…no more shaving…
Furry kitty…is an attractive kitty.
Pluto,
Hmm…may be I should describe myself a bit, I realized I have not really explained why some of the things have been talked here never really touched me in ways that are soul awakening. how do I even begin? hmm… OK, I haven’t watched TV for years, I don’t own a cell phone until about beginning of this year in attempt to be free from watchful eyes. I had a facebook for about couple of years and I hated it, never missed it for a min when I finally left that behind. I don’t have a tweeter or what have you, I don’t txt, I try to have a private blog where I can write down my journal so to speak but that turned sour since I lost my privacy. I don’t have very close friends because I don’t feel motivated to keep up “friendships” that really don’t run deeper than the activities we share. I don’t put on make ups, well, only when I feel I want to be extra pretty for no reason. I never wore Jewry until about beginning of this year, I don’t even have my ear pierced. I don’t paint my nails, I rather feel nothing is really prettier than the songs of the pinkish flow of healthy blood. I don’t drink, not even socially,I feel no problem to ask for orange juice if I ever walked into a bar, but I don’t go to bars, I love dancing, I dance in my house and in zumba classes, I love the feeling of letting my body melt into the rhythm of music and that’s my connection to it. I never did drugs, I don’t smoke, and I have no sex life, lol, I never even had a speeding ticket all of my life, my own mother calls me a non while she tries to put me in bikinis. LOL, oh boy, it’s actually funny when I type it out. But I don’t know, I don’t think anybody who actually interact with me when I am engaged would forget me, mainly because I really don’t give a flying turtles of what’s socially acceptable, and I speak whatever is truly on my mind when I do actually engage, I’ve created so many uncomfortable moments in my conversation with people it’s really normal for me now. But mostly I don’t engage with people, mostly I find watching them is more fascinating than talking to them, I know I’d be so bored five min into the conversation… I don’t know how to approach them when I am really not interest in what they are about to say. I don’t know, but I do believe I am not like anyone you have ever met in your life, but that’s to be determined. I was born into a family of scholars, I grow up around them all my life, scientist mostly, they have a very cute eternal innocence and quest for truth in them that rubbs off on me in many ways. I have no real appreciation for money and fame, I always wanted to write a book, but it turns me off that might turn me into a public figure. I gave away rather than earn, in business dealing I’m usually not allowed to decide how money will be spent because I gave it away, I once took a client to a factory and end up buying 20 heaters for the factory because it’s so cold, the owner never turned it on, to save electricity, that’s why I hate it, the whole thing about business turns me off in so many ways. I was never impressed by anyone’s fortune or fame unless you can impress me with your energy, passion, or shear craziness. I don’t appreciate money but I am grateful for the security it provided me, people feel unappreciated when I don’t give enough appreciation for the effort put into gaining them, “but you enjoy the benefit” they say, “but I would live the same happiness with only enough of it” I reply. I had in my life actually lived on the street for a week in my battle with my parent. I had lived where I had to tape pennies together in 10s so I can spend it, and extreme hunger, so I understand poverty and survival and I will never mock people who feel happiness just get out of it, and even I don’t express it, I really do appreciate for never having to live like that again. I only feel the right to decide how to live my life… so many things, I can’t really write them all… so dear Pluto, I don’t really GET the reality of the mask, I might have one, but not very different from how I truly look. My personal battle, in so many ways, is to actually engage in the living, rather then stop and step away from it…
So dear Pluto, I’m not really asking if you care about people, I know you do, I never doubted that for a fraction of a second … I ask on the level where do your pupil dilate or constrict when you see them? do you find them fascinating when you watch them live out life a certain way, even if you would never chose to live it. Do you find it endearing and cute when they speak of their hidden agendas…do you feel you want to hug them when you found certain peace and not in pain anymore. do you find their face animate and fascinating…do you… like them? it is OK if you don’t, I am curious as to who you are, I am curious about the man, sometimes I feel he lives in self-imposed darkness. I could be very wrong, but it never hurt to simply ask.
It’s late, I’m off to sleep.
Imagine Christ saying to Peter ‘Well, mate, this society is not ready for us yet. Ya know… we don’t want to be crucified (haha) for our convictions, do we? Let’s go and catch some fish instead….’
No. He chooses to stand tall and be who he was/has become – OPENLY. No mask. The Buddha – the same. How do we know? The IMPACT it had on a collective consciousness is still with us.
I am not saying this is the path for everyone. But the question is………….. why hiding? Why THE MASK? Why this (and let’s translate it)…..
“Much of my nature is hidden, in a casual social context.” = I conceal my true self, out there in the world I am just like all of you guys here.
And this……
“I show people what I want them to see.” = I am elusive. I premeditate all my interactions with people.
And this…
“It is only during trustworthy relating I share my deeper layers with others.” = Only when she bares her soul to the ground zero level, will I share the first level of my underworld… maybe. Ladies undress first.
“ Because the inner always equals the outer in people.” No, it does NOT equal, if the true self is not manifested OPENLY.
My idealistic self desperately wants to believe there are people out there who ACT on their convictions. Who say what they mean, and mean what they say, and DO what they say… I repeat… DO………. There doesn’t have to be a perfect consistency between what people do and say, no perfection needed. I just want them to be OPEN in their inconsistencies. I want to trust the REAL person, not some fantasy image, a flawless, perfect, halo shaking man in white robes. Even Jesus had his moments, what happened to ‘turning the other cheek’ when overturning tables in the temple?
My mask wearing lasts for about 15 minutes when meeting someone new. The aloof, detached and friendly Virgo goes to let in the intense Pisces. Maybe a shocker for people. It HURTS me to be someone else. Physically. It doesn’t mean the layers of me are instantly known. But only because there is never enough time in fleeting, everyday interactions with people to reveal all. But I don’t hide it consciously.
It is not enough to KNOW the Christ energy, even if this knowledge is earned through many catastrophic changes and has seen true self, stripped down to the core…. we have to take it further, to BE it, in everyday struggle with selves and the world at large. That rules out WEARING THE MASK. People do, yes, very much. But theirs is an unconscious instinctive stance purported by not knowing their true selves.
Ego is an INHERENT property of the human condition. Influenced by our interactions with the outside world., but NOT brought in externally. On a desert island the two last remaining people would rub their egos against each other. She’ll say ‘Let’s make the fire by the stream over there’……….He’ll say ‘No, I believe it’s best here by the big baobab’. And there it goes………………. So it’s not about not having an ego. It’s about being able to negotiate it in honesty, and with some people it is easier than others, i.e. some people just bring out the best in us, the best blend of energies there can be…
Ego is there from the moment we are born. Don’t believe it? Observe a two year old in a supermarket, when he/she wants something off the shelf. Now, observe the DIFFERENCE between a little girl there and a little boy there… Go on, it is glaringly obvious…. the (male) ego is fully formed and thriving after two, only two years of being in this world. She will be less demanding and more considerate, although still egotistic. Observe the babies and the differences between them. They need to survive, and their ego is manifested already, if unconsciously, and they will kill the surroundings with the screams and demanding attention.Yet, others just quietly moan and bear the torture all on their own. Both have egos – at different strengths.
The physiological equivalent of fear is adrenaline. You know how it hits in the stomach? And in the sensitive people – it hits you even BEFORE you realise consciously that something is terribly off in the atmosphere or surroundings. What is the physiological equivalent of ego?
“It’s as if the dark in me wants to destroy the dark (unconscious) not realized within her.” = MY ego wants to overpower HERS.
I reflected on a Scorpio man syndrome… like Pisceans, Scorpio men can weave amazing fantasy webs, except there is always an elaborate agenda, whether they even recognise it in themselves… But it’s far from the innocent Piscean stupidity of wanting to just ‘be’ in the bloody fairytale moment…. A Scorpion fantasy has a PURPOSE. And as such… a spin. As in ‘spin doctor’. And understanding that psycho hogwash – I want to see if there is a discrepancy between what a man says and what a man DOES. A true measure.
It’s thunderstorm here.
Agenda where? What do I want from these women?… Their agreement? LOL.
Are you that needy?… Really?… Wow.
You “disagree” so that must make you special. Okay. Good for you. I hope your amusing spasm heals the hell burning smoke up through your “mask”….We are simply witnesses.
Yes yes… you’re a deep soul, loving heart, and a giving spirit. That graceful post really does walk your talk.
Well… Tell the good people of this forum anything you want to about my agenda. I will read. But you will be iced-out.
Just stop your needy writing to my personal email. And go away.
Our friendship is over;)
It just occured to me…. where did I say that YOU weave fantasy webs? Where?
Of all I mentioned, all serious and important – you chose to attack the one which actually DOES NOT apply to you….
Hahaha, your internal sense of justice and decency does NOT allow you to attack the points which, you know deep within – stand true.
And for that, darling, you will always be loved.
“internal sense of justice and decency does NOT allow you to attack the points which, you know deep within – stand true.”
This is a contradictive statement, due to the nature of TRUTH. Just because you have internal values, it does not mean that you will choose to “attack” always on a fixed point.
Once you have the truth resonating within you and do not loose track of love, you actually are at DIVINE Liberty (and not a slave to your ego, desires and emotional turmoil) to have an infinite array of TOOLS at your disposal in order to deal with it.
Truth is not just a subjective internal sensation. It is something that RESONATES from the depths to the heights – from the best and the worst of you.
THE TRUTH RESONATES in our EXTREMES – OUR WHOLE – THE SUM OF OUR PARTS. Meaning, we have to have the capacity to SEE that unifying energy and not separate it.
When truth does that, it is definitely worth mustering up our courage and facing it. It won´t be the same for everyone, so yeah…why attack the illusion?
If we choose to separate everything, including truth, then it will be reduced to attacking, winning, loosing, controlling, dominating.
We only see half of the picture by refusing to completely involve ourselves in our own interactions with others.
“Truth is not just a subjective internal sensation. It is something that RESONATES from the depths to the heights – from the best and the worst of you…”
Yes. Here.
The Truth is always AMONG US (constant state of flux)… Not… in us.
Our “responses” trigger within us. So if we have the feeling capacity to receive God… we receive the perception and feeling of truth- Among us.
This statement… is alien to the self-definition and adaptations of “personality”. Thereby making it Unseen. Occult.
“On a desert island the two last remaining people would rub their egos against each other.”
Well….actually the pressure of “survival” is not discussing where to put the fire. hahaha!!!
Necessity brings about changes, and so does living on the threshold of facing your death.
It brings about the union of our inner and outer, for one purpose by forcing you to an instinctual level.
We seem to see survival as a luxury. But if I the only furry female on the island, I feel that I would not be nudging egos when looking at the stars under the light of the fire.
“On a desert island the two last remaining people would rub their egos against each other.”
Gatubela, you’re too kind to her.
Who we are, depends on our what we conceptualize in our environment. Two spiritual beings among nature, in my example, with zero concept of OUTSIDE parasitic personalities INFLUENCING their primal “knowing” means the man and woman in that cosmic state of being are free of ego.
What limited personality (intellect) fails TO PERCEIVE….does not make the modern material world TRUE amid this ego dominated environment. (manifestations of ego are ubiquitous)
Personality-intellect… is a product of it’s own CONCEPTUAL origin, or framework in relation with the collective ego. It cannot see beyond the collective ego and man’s world.
What the personality-intellect prison fails… fails… to see/feel/comprehend through the third eye… is that this world we humans are living and dying in the last 40,000 years (a speck of time relative to the age of the earth and universe)…
… is but a dream.
Living on a desert island is not facing your death EVERY MOMENT of existence, let’s be fair here. Sure, in the midst of running away from that tiger one is hardly going to argue with another which route to take… Like all flow of life, there will be life and death situations, and then there will be mundane times, and that’s when the ego battles begin.
NOBODY is able to live on the threshold of death 24/7. Even the most trained (or, conversely, the most enlightened) people need a break. Adrenalin is no joke in high concentrations OVER A PERIOD OF TIME. Heart attack, anyone?
“The Truth is always AMONG US (constant state of flux)… Not… in us.
Our “responses” trigger within us. So if we have the feeling capacity to receive God… we receive the perception and feeling of truth- Among us.
This statement… is alien to the self-definition and adaptations of “personality”. Thereby making it Unseen. Occult.”
That suggests that the Truth is relative. And to me it is absolute. While it takes place between and among people, it ultimately comes back to one question: the Truth of one’s essence, the inner Being = in us. And that is the absolute, never changing constant among ALL people, the human psyche. While the personalities are widely different and never repeating amongst us, each unique to its owner, the Truth of Being is One.
It is not an occult understanding. It is MADE occult with the arcane, inaccessible language, in the same way that the Church has obscured a few very simple truths from the Masses for generations. Why? Knowledge is (Outer) Power.
“NOBODY is able to live on the threshold of death 24/7. Adrenalin is no joke in high concentrations OVER A PERIOD OF TIME. Heart attack, anyone?”
I did for many years….I was told that if I would leave, I would be killed. There are people who live in war zones. Many people with terminal diseases. Not only do some people live on the threshold of death, they see it all around them, in the people they love. I heard gunshots every Friday, Saturday and Sunday night. Some babies live only a few hours and then they pass on.
Two people on an island together, is just a beautiful death…they would never be comfortable with each other. Love would not permit that, because you would be always seeking unity and killing the mundane.
She seeks his energy, he seeks her love….she seeks his love, he seeks her energy…in heart, mind, soul, body…..
You just have to be in the presence of someone who is absolutely sure of their capacity to survive and be free, in order for you to FEEL this effect on you, as a woman. You would definitely surrender to that.
Inessology,
I don’t know how to say this, but I was turned off by your post so much I couldn’t even finish reading it. This is my thing, I like people very much, up until they start to interact with me within that humanness I found so cute, then it’s cute no more. I really do not like to be used, I don’t like my comments to be used and twisted to the way to achieve your personal agenda. so stop doing it. I don’t care how you carry out your own thing with people, but you are going to get the wrath of the warrior when you hide behind what I have shared.
No, it is not my intention and context to describe myself to undermine what’s being shared here, what’s been shared here is the norm, I live a different life, but how REAL is that different life is part of the journey I need to find out. I shared my reality because if what Pluto are saying things that don’t connect to my reality, is only because I have never shared that reality, it has nothing to do his ability and depth to look deep into that reality and relate to it. It’s called communication. My life, it’s far from “truth”, I have in the past vigorously defended the righteousness of it. I am not part of the flock in anyway I would tell Apollo, and he told me “only because I did all the real work and dealt with the real people”. there was so much truth in that statement and it was my pain to finally face it. Yes, I lived as I wanted and as who I feel am… but in reality he is right, I never really have to deal with people, I walked away from them when they turn me off. I never had a real boss except for one year of my adult life, and he is actually a very very nice and honest person. I don’t give in to anything I don’t feel it’s right thing to do, but how much of it is because the people I don’t give in to actually love me. Apollo told me “do you realize you actually ALWAYS get what you WANT no matter how you say people try to make you do otherwise”… and it’s true…when I don’t give in, people give in, because they care for me. So how much truth is in the exception that is my life? my mom tells me that I am the vile on my own light and shine, that I am anti-social. “how are going to find out if you really like them or not if you don’t give people a chance?” “if you can’t deal with the problems of the people in his life, how can you expect he won’t be part of it?” she would tell me, and these thing they ring so much truth, that my journey is to find out… In the past I have lived a packed life, mostly because I flow along with Apollo’s energy in living it, and met many people, traveled around the world, because they are on the path. “Why don’t you get your own friends?” he would yell at me. In the unfolding of myself, I found that I do like people, that I love the energy and liveliness of human beings, but I don’t like the lack depth/interest in most of them, so to live a healthy life, I’m going to find the interesting people and befriend them, how to find them and where to find them, I don’t know, my life have told me mostly I am looking at wrong places, I need to figure out where is the right places, and finally meet them, and find out the truth of myself in relating to others, no more excuses. Same with my career, although I feel even what Apollo said is true, I will deal with people differently even I live in the realness of the real world simply because I don’t know how to deal with them otherwise, I can’t be something I am not, but this believe is never really tested with the pressure of survival, I’m going to test it.
So there it is, me, a different kind of dysfunction on the journey of living.
Hahaha, JoJo, you are funny and sweet.
“I’m going to find the interesting people and befriend them, how to find them and where to find them, I don’t know, my life have told me mostly I am looking at wrong places”…………Cute. JoJo, people are not collectables. I used to look for ‘interesting people’…. until I discovered that they are ALL interesting, each in their own way. What’s your criterion on deciding who is worthy and who is not? Befriend them, by all means, but don’t go to pieces IF they choose to go.
You don’t need to find the ‘right’ words to say things, because what comes out of you is emotionally honest, even if slightly psychotic and incoherent at times. Actually, I brought it up because it hit the nerve, because it has been brewing within me for some time now… some of it was written before, just never posted, and that’s the truth. It would have come out one way or another, but hey… it had to be today. These are MY doubts, MINE alone.
Unlike you, I always give people a chance…. One… three….seven.. and more chances, because people do make the most strange choices, and do act in the most stupid, incomprehensible ways, and I UNDERSTAND that, both from my eternal, God given consciousness, and from my life experiences…. But one day one last chance is ENOUGH, and then…. I don’t look back. No grudges, and I will talk, just not share me anymore.
My life is ALL about the pressure of survival. There are no identical lives, and yours is different to every other life out there, because who you are is different to every other person out there. But we still share the universal truth of who we are at a soul level. So…put away that machete of yours and drop creating artificial barriers here, based on your PERCEPTION of what was and wasn’t meant. Because a lot of what you say – I can relate to on a deep level. And because I choose my battles now, not accept those thrust upon me.
If you didn’t finish reading, how can you proceed making a comment? If you want to know – ask, girl. Otherwise – sail by and ignore.
I keep thinking, JoJo….
“I need to figure out where is the right places, and finally meet them, and find out the truth of myself in relating to others, no more excuses.”
From my personal experience.. there are no wrong or right places, and there are no right or wrong people to meet. Every person I’ve met – had something to teach me. Some were ex convicts, some were ambassadors. Some of those lessons I didn’t get until much later. Some hit me immediately and stayed for life.
When you do meet those new people… what kind of voice will you hear inside? This person is…. what? Clever, educated, soulful, fit (haha, a ridiculous British expression about physicality), well connected?
Or simply, like the soulful connection I feel with my friend where we both recognize that it was fate that brought us together, it was meant to happen? Nothing we go through – will EVER sever that connection, and her life means so much to me, and I feel so blessed to have her in my life it is beyond words…. We feel closer to one another than we feel to our families, and in a way she is more a family to me. And she is not massively brainy. And she has no flashy job or some fantastic talent. She is just fucking great – inside. She has a beautiful soul. Really. Even thinking of that makes me cry.
So the right place to start, I found out, is within. This is the place to look for friendships. My relationships with people changed dramatically in the last six months, beyond recognition. Why? I stopped feeling like a hunted animal and opened up. I look at people and see… uniqueness of each one of them. Their one off, never ever to be repeated unique universes. Even those most irritating people who haunted me – stopped. Because… I haunted myself within. They simply reacted. It doesn’t make them instantly better people. They are just better – around me. And I am grateful.
And JoJo, if you always walk away from people who turn you off – you failed to look into their souls. Once I did and keep looking in – it is compassion for their plight that remains. No annoyance. For their stupid automatic reactions, their unrealised dreams, their childhood hurts and adult nightmares, which are even worse….
LOL have I ever hidden behind anybody? Just the thought makes me giggle. Ask my ex boss, a beautiful (person) Sagittarius girl who taught me that life is about not taking things personally and having leaps of faith. And I taught her that in our field details and personal touch matter, because it is about people. We had our battles. We still meet.
It is easy to talk about being soulful here. But to start with… please do not assume anything anybody writes about here – has anything to do with YOUR posts and YOUR hurts and YOUR expression. It is an unfounded ASSUMPTION. You react (now and in the past) to something not related to you at all… And I still maintain that reactions here reveal so much about each one of us. Remember, I did. I was that person. Sometimes in real life I still am. But I am aware.
Inessology,
I read the first line of your reply and really don’t want to read any further, I’ve seen this so many times…I really want have no part of what you wish to engage, and I’ve said all I wish to say. But there is something important need to be said, to you, and to women everywhere.
You are here driven by something else entirely, the air is racked with the smell of it. If I were you, I’d tell the man who I feel wronged me “fuck you too, dick” long ago, and I’d get on the process of either getting over it or in my case, moving on. There is dignity in that undiluted realism, how we feel, face it. instead of living behind these plastic smile, excuses to express, abuse truth and communication…yeah, there are people like you all over my life, I can’t force them to look deeper than their own boring predictability, all I can do is when it’s time to speak mine, I do it, and watch them unfold. what is WRONG with you people? don’t bother to answer, I’m not interested in more fakeness. Men and women get away behaving this way, men and women play these games, have you ever wondered why NO ONE truly FELT there is something very wrong in the picture? even when you can’t find the word to describe it, why no one felt the wrong in the game, rather, who played which part? Because in truth women want to fuck other women, sometimes more than they want to get in bed with the man of their interest, and vice versa. you have to get out the fucking game to be free of it, otherwise it’s only matter of when you are going to get played, and you are fucking guilty of playing others, take your karma, and make a choice of what to do with it. Just remember this message and take it that I speak out of love for women everywhere no matter how harsh I speak of it.
Things like this is draining and meaningless, and bring back sucking memories. The end.
Peace the turtle out.
“If I were you, I’d tell the man who I feel wronged me “fuck you too, dick” long ago”
JoJo, what a strange assumption on your part. Why do you believe (from that statement) that any problems a woman may have – come through a man? You see my life is very different to yours, and men do not figure in it at all, my choice for now. I am (I can safely say) older than you and have gone through a similar period in my life that you are facing now. It is all done and dusted, I have no issues with that.
Anything I struggle with – is ME. My own worst enemy. Not relationships with other people, I do not have that same issue. But my relationship with self and the world at large. My place in this world. My purpose. My meaning in it. These are the questions I grapple with. So when you reduce it to men…. LOL, I wish it was that simple.
I really don’t feel like taking my knickers off in public though.
Hahaha, look at this personal horoscope Aug th 6th….
“You could very well become so angry with someone that you decide they’re not worth being nice to any more. Well, then … shouldn’t you at least give them a hint — just in case you’re wrong? (Not that that’s possible, but just to be safe ….) You’ve had all the bickering you can stand. You’re ready to deliver an extremely terse good-bye. Just be sure you don’t rush out immediately to find yourself another worthy opponent.”
Spot on!!!
Agenda was about Scorpio men in general, not you specifically. But of course everything, as usual, taken very personally. Words about elevated state of being versus actions in that elevated state of being…… And here we are… within three choices: to ignore, to react, to give a thoughtful reply – you chose to react. Again.
How is that different from the millions out there who react in the same way to their spouses, lovers, friends, family? In the same way they allow their PERSONALITIES to take over, to sabotage the relationships, to unconsciously inflict much pain and plant the seeds of mistrust? Where is that inner Dove, the essence of your soul that should rule your interactions with others (or so you suggest to women here)? Why do you not apply this to yourself?
WHERE is that beautiful Dove, dear Eagle? Surrender is about yielding to the moment, taking it as is… without bringing in the negative content. But… as I said… ladies first?
Yes, I am a deep soul, I see (feel internally) what you cannot. It is way beyond accessing ego personalities and immediate realities of people and cultural/societal pressures, it does not reside in this world…. I hear a different song. Always had. I am human, like all. I can be unconsciously nasty and stubborn and hurtful, without meaning to. The difference is…. I forgive those in others, because I *me* see a multitude of sins in myself.
I’m brutally realistic underneath my aloof demeanour – I will poke the holes in the fabric of one’s story until I know the Truth. Much like your shady self crawling about in the Underworld HQ. Why do I need to poke? I don’t know. I feel it is because while I am very open in life, I do not trust the Truth of anybody’s stories that easily, of what they portrait themselves to be. Because my gut instinct and my life experiences tell me people are not what they seem. . So… I poke until I know. I will love regardless of whether the holes are there or not. But I need not be kept in dark as to their existence. You’ve found your mirror.
I knew the reaction would follow. The truth is I am able to elicit ANY kind of reaction from you now, learned from the Master… I can make you go all soppy, because you are so bloody vulnerable to an emotional appeal from a woman, either myself or others, it doesn’t matter… I can bring up a philosopher in you…. or make you go as cold as ice…. but that was not what I wanted. I wanted to know the real answers. Why the Mask? If you look deep within yourself – why the need for it? Can you be straight forward and answer, instead of going through meaningless motions and give me meaningless answers?
Friendship…. (sigh), we’ve been through this before. YOU called it that. So stop being that condescending. If a friendship falls at the first hurdle… what KIND of friendship is it? The truth is if you wanted a fucking kidney tomorrow you’d get a kidney from me, but you see only words…. only words….
NO ONE is out there to get you, dear Sabotier. Until you at least accept that… I don’t want to talk in person. That said… if I feel like posting – I will post. Don’t read, simple.
I have bags to pack.
Be well.
“The truth is I am able to elicit ANY kind of reaction from you now, learned from the Master…”
With the power to elicit reactions, the fish still asks “Why the mask?”…
Power still means stagnant ignorance….for you.
Inessology,
I did read your last few post, I guess that is a tad of improvement on my part. yes, I could be running on my own assumptions, but I don’t really believe in coincident. Self-Honesty to me is more about “no, I’m not fine”, rather than “oh I’m fine”. Surrender to me is what happens between a man/women and his/her maker, it doesn’t happen between you and me or any other combination, and I’d like to keep it that way, in the VERB. In a nut shell, I’ve answered what you’ve questioned. and if you would like to believe someone is really trying to say what they mean, and take it that I mean I really have no interest in engaging with you. Thanks for your understanding.
…it took me a longer time, but I need to tell you this too. Love is about seeing that person living in certain reality, and instead of finding that quick and easy answer where a thousand stranger would recognize with the same math, and wanting to see the scar and what lead to the scar and then you feel none of the quick and easy answer is important anymore. It’s never about give him a kidney, I’ve once listened on the radio where the man’s wife give him a kidney and he wished she never did, because now the kidney lives with them too. Love is about give him that kidney and forget about it, and make sure he would forget about it too. better yet forget you are willing to give him a kidney and just give it to him when he need it. You are braver and stronger than me, then find in that bravery and strength the will to find what love is, and simply love, everything will change with your dynamic thereafter. have faith in this.
…I have promised myself never do this again, get involved in anyway, now I’ve done it again, but I feel I need to say it, then it’s said.
Pluto,
It seems I may be running on my own assumptions on certain things, I should have asked first, but I act in good faith rather than anything else, so please forgive me. Remember when I ask you that I’m in acceptance of how you chose to relate to my truth, I thank you for choosing to stay, and now when I’m facing certain reality, please forgive me I chose to stay away, it is within the part of “I’m not fine” that is my journey. There were times in my life when stay away was too late and I had to claw my way out in pain, but I’m really not looking for a repeat of that in any way, in fact I’m not looking to get within a thousand miles radius of anything remotely close to that, if souls can be measured in distance. So forgive me for going coward on you. and thank you for the very short but amazing relating, I’m already crying, I’m really not cut out for things like this. sorry.
It took me a long time…but I need to tell you this…Have you ever seen moth in summer nights? there is an ancient saying: “moth dance into fire” it morphed into an idiom meaning one brought upon one’s own destruction, it was never used in a good way in literature…but to me, the moth is so mesmerized by that brilliant dance of color, change, shine, flickering, shapeless energy, that the moth is so drawn to it, irresistible…has to find out, has to be close, has to have it, has to kiss it, the fire, can’t stay away…so the moth fly to it, not really because it wants to die, but rather it believes all the answer lay within the fire, rather than outside it, the outside is the outside, the outside is the life of the moth, predictable and known, but the fire holds all the mystery and brilliance, and the answer where predictability cannot comprehend… so it must dance to it, it is a slave to that drawn, but via that dance of death, freedom lays behind it. what is behind that light? what is the mystery behind the burning? and only in the ashes, he is moth no more, slave no more. It’s not about what he can have from that dance, the bravery is he would give everything simply to find out what’s behind it, the non-stoppable searching, he doesn’t really see a choice in this, he has to find out, otherwise he remain enslaved for that drawn, the fire that burns within that brave heart, death for freedom. This is what I see in the brave people, Scorpio men…I am not one of them…but I see in them this bravery and recognize its beauty. The question is no matter who we are, whether we are part of that journey or not, how we feel, what we experienced, how scared we are…can we see it? can we recognize beauty for beauty itself? unconditionally? and give that moment and sincerity to express our recognition to him/them…unconditionally? so Pluto, before I embark onto my cowardliness, I would like to say I recognize it, in you, in Scorpio men, and it is beautiful.
Thank you for showing me.
Thank you JoJo for your sincerity and mindfulness.
My messages, my intent, have always intended to give from a place of hope and expansion and faith and strength in the human heart. That is… until a frightened and possessed moron who does not know her own fears— wants to rape it, and twist my originality… and then use her psychosis as if her basis came from her. Political gamesmanship has never won a male Scorpio soul.
You are loved over here JoJo. So are you Gatubela and Umm. Please know that. We are family.
Don’t ever allow someone to nag and mock you into oblivion and then actually “believe” that they are healthy for you. Discretion in a relationship in my world forever trumps any false idol of “3 chances many chances”. If one is foolish to want chances instead of integrity, courage and love… then I say they deserve the karma of that redundant choice.
Co-dependency is truly what almost every person wants in a relationship. They won’t say they will. It just happens that way in the real world. But as I see who I am becoming, I know co-dependency is not healthy for me.
INTERDEPENDENT INDIVIDUATION??— Yes, Now we’re talkin’. That works for me. As everyone has seen, I don’t live by the sword for another person unless they are helpless and innocent (in mind). Co-dependency cannot see or find it’s spirit above personality (intellect) so it fails to find it’s own meaning. Misery has it’s own meaning. So does physical company and companionship, they too have their own meaning. So misery does love company. They all stem from fear of change and the unknown. You just need to see what’s manifesting around you. The meaning I find in life and death, is simply not of that origin.
Walking away from a cancerous, indignant and political-game driven relationships (people) is not only a demonstration of brave individuation… it is the most precious act of lovingness a person could ever muster.
I haven’t found the woman who is on a quest beyond and below the cancerous game-driven misery mentioned in the above paragraph. I simply have not met an utterly unique woman with her own power of individuation and higher being. I know I will never cross paths with her in this physical existence. If I did, that would mean she would love her solitude as I do, and she would demonstrate her own original mind source and psychological fearlessness. I have to revere the woman I surrender to. And I can only know who she is by how we relate. She’d have to manifest a warrior spirit as I. Not a personality as every one else.
Ines,
…..“It is only during trustworthy relating I share my deeper layers with others.” = Only when she bares her soul to the ground zero level, will I share the first level of my underworld… maybe. Ladies undress first…..
Undress first haha… opps sorry 🙂 Being nakeedd?? uggh..
Undress before YOU first… before GOD… Remove your mask and be very honest to yourself… you will see what your real “agenda” is not his agenda, Mr Scorpio agenda or other people’s agenda. You may or may not be aware of that person behind your mask… but you can try…
Chances…
The universe… and even life itself…. gives us all the chances we need even the most awful experiences are helpful to awaken our consciousness. We meet angels along the way, like Pluto… who can help you bring yourself back to your own attention to help you transform your life. But sometimes it is us who run away from ourselves…
“until a frightened and possessed moron who does not know her own fears— wants to rape it, and twist my originality… and then use her psychosis as if her basis came from her.”
Here… that’s your personality talking. When it could be your soul. Your choice.
I am yet to meet a man who wouldn’t attempt to take advantage of my gentle nature (doesn’t come out here, huh), i.e. would have the INNATE decency as part of his intrinsic make up which would PREVENT him from doing so…. A man who, by virtue of who he is – CHOOSES not to abuse (I am not talking physical here), even if he could. A strong, but KIND man, do you even understand this combination? There was one, and he is one of my three friends.. The rest.. not even worth mentioning. I repeat ‘A man like that does not exist.’
Somewhere you said you get attracted to women who need a rescue ( ‘helpless and innocent’), and you realized it is not good for you. Yet, every time you attempt to pound everything out of a woman, to overpower any cost, STRIP her of her personality, while retaining yours. How is a woman to live in that outside world WITHOUT one? Especially when she is on her own, responsible for EVERY decision she makes in life?
I look you STRAIGHT in the eyes, darling. I don’t want anything from you, because everything I need – I already have – within me. I’d prefer you to answer in a calm manner. I’d even prefer you to TELL ME OFF in a CALM MANNER. I want to trust you to be the man you say you are. Instead… you choose to engage your personality, conjure up some crappy Agenda excuse and throw the first automatic response……… ‘She’d have to manifest a warrior spirit as I. Not a personality as every one else’… Well…
You like ALL of us here struggle with LIVING your truth out there. Women here do understand that, the same as me. They are just kind, messed up, loving and forgive you for that, because you give hope and a promise of something real. A promise. Notice, unlike you, I am not ‘rallying the troops’, giving words of love to this and that, to gain ‘support’ here. I don’t care how I come across to others. Everything you do and say it transparent to me, and I simply feel sad that at any sign of confrontation you become – YOUR PERSONALITY.
Just remember your own words:
“But you have to LET IT IN. As does he. A mutual ego surrender. A surrender of the will. A devotion for absolute integrity and openness and faith in the exchange.”
Mutual. That which you so much desire in others – you cannot do yourself. That’s why you need a surrender of another first – to show you HOW, to trust the possibility of it. I understand all that. But I am older and wiser now. Because my personality has never been well defined, I submitted myself to men and their will too much. No pride, no demands, being told as and when, a spineless woman with a lot of love within and no sense of self. I don’t want this anymore. I want to keep what God has given me, and which I didn’t know I had – SELF.. No one is taking it away. Because I’ve lived in my own fantasy world too long, like a flower, not knowing or anticipating from day to day what will be, naive and utterly helpless, one of those women you used to like so much. Not any more. I am not going back there. I’d rather die.
That actually made me cry…
I have days on the road ahead of me, living in unity with nature. Detox from the untruths, because nature does not lie about who/what it is. It just is.
Thank you for the lesson. I wish you well.
“Yet, every time you attempt to pound everything out of a woman, to overpower any cost, STRIP her of her personality, while retaining yours. How is a woman to live in that outside world WITHOUT one? Especially when she is on her own, responsible for EVERY decision she makes in life?
The answer to that question is rather obvious –
Love.
It is the result of a conflict resolved, through harmony, once the truth is perceived.
Once I went to a stone mountain park in the deep south, there are these stone carvings on the ground, I read them all, one of them read “if the capable and worthy retire, the designing and worthless will take their place” I took a picture of it on the camera and kept the message in my heart. It rest in the places where the when they are called upon, they answer.
I didn’t sleep much last night, cried a lot, so many things went through me, I see this journey, see my past, see the many forms of my fears, see the ones that are broken, the ones that are not. I’m not afraid to be wrong anymore, or to be vulnerable, or to be an open wound, not anymore. I said when the time comes, I speak the dignity of my realism and watch people unfold. and they unfold. Most people I encounter are uncomfortable with it, my brand of un-comfort is not of question who they are, but show them who I am, the critic, the users, the competitors, the opportunist, the manipulative, along with the fixer-upers, the looking away, the caring, the protector, the chatter box, they unfolded. But rarely anyone wanted to share their own realism, not even a hint of it, most of them are unaware of the origin of their own pain. This is in my physical life. on the internet people unfold in different ways…the capable and the designing, the worthy and the worthless. People unfold in their own unaware but unique ways in front of their own, and other people’s vulnerabilities… eventually.
All knowledge eventually comes down to self-knowledge, even if part of it are shown to you, through me.
I’m not really effect by it, not in the way of my venerability making me more or less, my life is in the form of one choice at a time, and every single choice I make everyday, is the journey… the whole that is greater than the sum of my parts is who I am, my parts are in there too , it’s not separated. To walk away from the designing, is always a conscious choice, the rest of the ignorant, is really a lack of interest. My journey/test is to find out, at what price I am my choice? what would break me? loneliness? void? survival? or nothing? and I have never made an active effort to seek people out…why?
The butcher and us constantly ask ourselves, each other, why are we doing what we do? the decade of power, the smell of viciousness, from them, from us, there is really no other way fighting that viciousness, not something any of you ever encounter on the internet, not here, in this country, I’m talking about modern day witch hunting, people lost jobs, commit suicide, driven to psychological melt-downs from the vicious mob, that inhuman laugh. It’s a terrible thing to watch, that’s why I hate that country so much and its breeding ground of common witch hunters walking on the internet, the complete lack of integrity, decency, love…in the life of self-imposed fear ans slavery, people turn into monsters, toward each other, their government is a representation of who they are, if you are brave enough to question the PEOPLE, you ARE the WITCH. they hunt you, kill you with their WORDS, without any real consequences.
I got carried away, we question ourselves, because no matter how just is the cause, we FEEL the DECADE of power, we see the darkness rub onto us, turn us, we speak to each other in that viciousness, sometimes, there is no way to stay white in an ink well, and we taste the pleasure, yes, there are pleasure in power, when hundreds upon hundreds of mindless robots follow you, hang on to your every word, warship the ground you walk upon, do everything you suggested, the slave mentality breed slaves…yes, they follow POWER, there is that demonic pleasure of power… if ever anyone tell you otherwise, it’s a lie. It was my dark years… So eventually we couldn’t stand it anymore, the butcher can hardly maintain his minority anymore when the mobs start to FOLLOW him, he through the years of slaying with truth, has become a symbol of the new “hot”, they don’t care what he said, he’s IN now. Sometimes the war is no longer for justice, but to BE the minority…So we become lost in our identity of who we were, and the murder of me happened, we turned on each other, every personal demon surfaced with that conflict, we eventually fell apart, the butcher fights, but more towards personal battle now days… During all these years, battles, I know what it feels like to manipulate, attack…even for the name of justice…only when it were over, I feel the difference, and only now I have the words to voice it:
that when you are IN that manipulation, attack, you ARE what it eats, it is your soul it feeds upon every single min. You lies, games, manipulations, it sometime works, it sometimes doesn’t, people come and people go, but YOU are its constant companion, every single min of your worthlessness you stay in it. YOU are your own karma, your soulless shape-shifting, plastic laugh rather than authentic joy, and nameless anger is its voice, telling you the truth of your choices. That is why I made a conscious choice to stay away from games and the designing. I’m never going to willingly be any part of it, and it is not because I’m weak.
I feel this is important to share.
Pluto,
Family…a permanent commitment and acceptance from the solitary warrior…I’m honored, and I will return this honor or try my best to return this honor with everything that word means: Adventure, curiosity, courage, integrity, truth, support, love, forgiveness, joy, sharing, and much more. We are family here. I will love unconditionally and namelessly as love are born into this world. As I type it out, I feel a big smile unfolding on my face.
Hi JoJo,
“yes, they follow POWER, there is that demonic pleasure of power… if ever anyone tell you otherwise, it’s a lie. ”
Which is why true power is only in the surrender. Demonic pleasure in power, is your will involved and your heart blacked out. Anyone who feels alone and does not feel love, will succumb to the illusions to be found in this abyss.
No REAL danger. No REAL protecting of the innocent and the weak. No TRUTH. You are a victim to its endless appetites and hunger. You don´t personally involve yourself in these battles, preparing for your death and to face GOD. There is no love in them either. Dark meets the dark, and the battleground is riddled in misused sexual energy and not divine union.
It is only when our demons are connected to our hearts, that this dynamic changes. The way for this to happen, is only through learning to love, as a state of BEING. To lose your heart, is to lose the connection to the divine. I place demons in my heart – because then I can see them through the perspective of unity. They are the same energy. The big difference was the absence of “I”.
Ines, war is inevitable – while we are still attached to form. The peace that I seem to be generating, was only done, because I know the price of darkness. Women and men have different roles in these things. They are not the same.
P.Puppy for me, chooses to react, because of his own energies and his own innate capacities and gifts. Peace is not truly obtained, while we are stagnantly caring. I have not created peace – not really. What long lasting effect or impact has it had on you? The same impact as in the collective consciousness as the Christ energy?
In order to change our collective consciousness, that would mean some serious collective seed planting. lol..and that means that peace is not something that anyone can give you. Peace is actually a tangible. I absorbed it through the cosmos, and asked to learn its lessons. Anytime you truly want to BE something, it is literally given to you on a platter, along with an abyss to study in and learn to BE.
The only times I have created something truly lasting, has been through my battles. That made an impact, because I engaged my heart and soul and faced my death.
The darkness turned into heaven through loosing my fear.
“I have not created peace – not really. What long lasting effect or impact has it had on you?”
More than you can imagine… Faith and trust. Trusting that there ARE people (women) who mean it. Mean what they say and do – with every atom of their body. Faith that soulful love does exist. Those two are precious.
Here, a Leo animation, I love it:
http://www.russellgrant.com/horoscopes_astrology/horoscopes/daily_leo.php
We have a train to catch.
Be well, dear Gatubela
What I am about to say is coming from my heart, because I never expressed it, although felt it along the way…. And it is the last post, I have deleted all accounts and unsubscribed, and all is gone now blah, blah, my decision…
It is very easy to discern here among women those who really are LIVING their truth and their love. Those who, in line with their feminine essence – do not judge, do not condemn, do not read any negative content into what’s written, do not try to read between the lines – what is not there, and do not react. They are not perfect and have their moments. But the essence of love is felt within them. I may or may not be this in real life, but there is always room for improvement.
To those I want to say ‘thank you’ from the bottom of my heart: Gatubela, who, as passionate as she is – directs this passion towards peace, and not war…. to LoveMari, who is simply a nurturing soul with mother like qualities – the way nature intended for women… to Ms Pink and Emerald, who I didn’t talk to, but feel their inner core as natural and genuine… Those I felt love from, even in the most difficult moments. Thank you, girls.
JoJo is moving in that direction, but there is a long road still ahead of her, I wish her to get where she wants to be one day.
I wish you all love and serenity, in the face of whatever life may throw at you. It was an honour to know all you girls, regardless of whether we had our misunderstandings or not. You are all beautiful women, the salt of the Earth. Without people like you the world would collapse into darkness.
Love
Ness
Lol Bella, you are my favorite kitty lady, there are actually lots lots of Leos in my life, 3 in my immediate family, all males thou, my bonbon is a little lion too, the little brilliant sun is so warm to be around, he loves the color orange, I ask him why, he said “because it’s the color of the sun!” this is when he was about five.
… Yes, I have tasted the demonic pleasure of power, that’s the only way I felt how it ate at my soul, learned its darkness and know it is not something I ever want to be, the pain of “facing” that followed those years is no light matter. That facing is in reality the true beginning of this long journey… The whole thing with fighting with darkness,It is really not something I can really explain, except may be soldiers who went to real battle, then may be no words are needed, but it’s ok, it is not the burden of civilians to understand, nor it ever should be.
I really respect you very much, and we can built that real connection in relating starting right now, who know where that will take us, but mystery, isn’t it already exciting? My last real close female friend is back in junior high, I communicated with her via long distance for about 15 years, Then she became a responsible adult and we lost that innocent inner connection we had when we were young, so solid, pure, healthy female company with people like you is what I’m seeking on this journey too. Woman I can really talk to. If you would like that too? May be I will email you tomorrow, you have your email somewhere on the form right? Would you like that?
love, jojo
Getubella,
I take this as a no? Don’t worry, I asked, if I wasn’t in acceptance for that 50% chance of NO in answers, I may as well break in and kidnap the kitty, lol. So the search continues with no hard feelings.
In my years with the butcher, I’ve learned so many unhealthy things from him, we all did, because we all believed in him. And when things break apart, we all blamed him for so many of our un-aimed anger, then later in the facing, I realized no one is responsible for my own giving up of the individuality and original self. He is his own kingdom and his own journey, so are we all. So talk to people, look them square in the eye, respect. The Scorpios are themselves, so are we all, feel your own cosmic and individual answer in what’s right and what’s not in this matter.
I actually wrote a whole lot in my answer about the darkness, but deleted it, words never come out right to describe it, it’s like being a parent, or fall in love, most time you just have to say: be a parent, or fall in love, then you will understand. But you can’t really say destroy someone, and you will understand.
We went in the battle because the butcher had awakened something in us, we become conscious to ourselves and to a situation no one is doing anything about, we went in because no one went in, not the knowledgeable, not the prepared, not anybody, so it’s just us and the pitch forks. The butcher used to cry that why is it in this world no one cares. We went in without any knowledge or preparation to what will happen/grow to us within. We don’t know darkness, it wasn’t the reason or our consciousness. So what happened was painful, raw, and broken in the end. We might all need to see a psychologist for these experiences, but we had only each other to question.
Relating is an undiluted willingness to understand, it’s not driven by anything other than that soul center of compassion and love. But it is not something that is aimless, because everyone of us, we are limited, our time, energy, focus, so who to relate to actually is a conscious choice. Make the choice is already very far down the journey, many people, me included, drifted through life without really aware it, sometimes even their whole lives.
Truth do not exist only in laboratories, in fact most of times, hard earned through living, being wrong, pain, messes, the not so pretty things. It humbles you.
Hi JoJo,
It was not a no – Please, do write.
I am a bit shy …at first. hahaha! Cancer moon does sometimes hide in her shell observing the situation…feeling the atmosphere too…soul tweaking her heart…
I do understand the idea of battle – based on my own. Something in me also was awakened, based on death. It certainly was not life, but perhaps the protection of something so sacred that had been lost. Life kills just as much as death does…
But when truth resonated, it was death protecting life. I chose to “die” with my children, and in so doing, a new life was born.
Can you feel a bit of it in this song? I can not get rid of the sadness I feel, when I know that this sacred energy feels like it is lost in this world. So infinite…so real…beautiful and graceful. Worth the surrender.
So yes, I stand alone, facing God and death, for the beauty of my own chioces and my struggles to be me – not perfect.
I would not have it any other way because it was for love, which resonates in me as well.
My email is meowgatubela@yahoo.com
Bella,
Thank you for the post and the music… I wrote something else, but end up couldn’t post it, I went in this choice of relating, not really knowing what to expect, it’s nerve rocking and it had taken a lot of guts to just ask. In making this jump, feeling you, feeling me, things unfold in me. I don’t know how to call it, but a gut feeling. It’s a sense that tells me that you are not ready for this on the level that I am ready. Of course you are not, I asked. But I would like to describe it to you, so via understand me, understanding the scorpioc psyche a bit. How do I describe it… it feels like if you close your eyes, there is this focus in me, I know where it’s directing, the concentration, depth, and intensity of its origin, and I feel that returning focus from you, it’s kind, gentle, and nice… like a pretty flower you take on a road trip, but not really a partner…and that the flower is content in its own beauty, it’s best not to disturb it, the world needs flowers, they make it a kinder place. I don’t know if I’m making sense to you… maybe most of the relating between people of the world feels this way, I don’t know, I have never tried with clarity and consciousness in this attempted deep relating beside my mom and my son, but they are different, there is that default permanent commitment, acceptance, and would-die-for-you kind of love with them. with social relating, it’s different… maybe we should keep our communication here, where it’s meaningful and caring, instead deep and down under where I need go to have that intimacy, even with close female friends. Thank you Bella, and the search continues without hard feelings. Many hugs.
That´s alright JoJo….
I have a little assignment this weekend for bunnies nation wide.
I’d like you all to interpret the ideological story, lived-out in the flesh, of Brave Heart… the movie.
Within this story, is an immortal spirit, soul and mind manifested through the physical body of a humble (and happy) man. His whole life contrasts and conflicts “with personality” riddled throughout.
I want you guys to to interpret not only his warrior spirit, his innate capacity to kill lustfully in the the midst of mans ego (the English King)… I’d like for women to understand the incredible love story behind his ULTIMATE MOTIVATION and HIS HIGHER PURPOSE… in contrast with the mortal thinking and scheming (deceptions) of his own noblemen and opposing King alike.
What I’m saying here is that I could not slay despots and muppets in literal terms as he did within our political and loveless institutions…. without paying the due karma of condemnation. They’d send me to prison and execute me.
Yet my INTRINSIC NATURE and innate spiritual perception of humanity and freedom is hauntingly similar to the story told of William Wallace. The only difference is that my current spirit and soul is in this body today, modern civilized 2012,
So instead of killing on the battlefield…. my mind and tongue does the killing.
…. Plus… my mind and tongue also does the…. lovin’.
LOL
She gave him a flower…..
lol ppuppy very scorpio mercury in the 8th house! The tongue does the killing and loving! ouch! 🙂
Hmmm will watch the movie over the week end I haven’t seen it yet… it sounds very intense.
Hi Mari,
Wonderful to hear from you!
You’re so scrumptious with love I can taste it from here! hahaha.
Within each and every one of us, there are boundaries… like the comedians, when they offer themselves for their jokes, it’s humor, when then do that on some else’s expenses, then it’s rude and offensive. We all understand that and live by those mutually accepted boundaries.
During my years with the Butcher, every one of us has given up our own boundaries. In those masses of that inhuman laugh, there are the vicious, the blind, but also the truly unaware. Not so unlike ourselves before we become conscious. So in attempt to reach out to the people who truly just weren’t aware what are they were contributing to, the Butch and us give up ourselves to that cause. There were no boundaries; we offered ourselves and each others as examples and tools to help the unaware understand, to relate to them, so long it was for a higher cause, we overcame the discomfort of giving up boundaries, being in the wrong… the prudence of being a monster. It was uncomfortable and nerve racking in the beginning, the Butcher used us freely in his quest for truth and justice, more so he used himself. But as times goes on, these boundaries no longer mattered, so long we can see the purpose and intent of why we were offered.
It has become a norm in me, to expect from others I feel on the same quest of truth as I am, to give up that boundary… I realized it is wrong of me to expect that from anyone who hasn’t volunteered. Everyone of us in that cause volunteered to do so and has gone through so much self-reconstruction to be able to be at peace with being defenseless, we give up self-defense for a cause, self-defense, self-protection, which is so vital to our normal daily life. We did it out of our free will under very special circumstances. It’s wrong to expect this in others, in different life situations entirely, no matter if they are also on the quest for truth and higher purpose. It is our Cosmo given freewill to do what is our own right and sanctuary. So I apologize to you Pluto for what I had taken liberty of in the past, and I will not do it again. I believe those who already understood your higher purpose, would of already understood the essence of the man, and those who doesn’t, weren’t truly looking for anything beyond the easy answer they look for in lives in general.
Those who understood Journeys, understood journey man.
Hope and duty.
The bravery, it comes before the heart, but the heart is where it belongs.
The giving gives freely to love and compassion in its many forms, the conning, the complicated, but its essence is with those who are as unpolluted and pure.
Flower can live out its natural life on the streets of civilizations, tigers can’t.
When a man asks for understanding, is when he feels he is misunderstood.He asks because he cares about those who misunderstood him.
Some people in life, they feel before they hear, they think, they process, that’s why everything feels personal.
No matter what our own journeys are, we understand and love you Pluto, that’s why we are here and not elsewhere, we are family here.
… and on the end note, check out Mel Gibson’s name on the credit screen at the very end. Lol.
Continuing from the bottom of 1623,
… So the Truth of life and death (energy) always moves among people, all through space and time, and everything else within the scope and scale of that human’s adopted conceptualized reality.
As the mind of William Wallace states in response to the French lady’s appraisal of his Knighthood:… “I have been given nothing… God makes men what they are.”
She later offers him gold, titles, lands and says to him.. “Peace is made in such ways”.
Wallace passionately responds… “SLAVES are made in such ways!!”
This exchange is a great example of how the Truth of unseen “belief” (blind belief just like the masses accept to survive) in one human reality, is then in return manifested through the reception and vision of another.
Vision. That word is not just a word. As with Truth and Love,vision is a VERB. Wallace had the vision and the courage to manifest what he felt. He was One with the Source itself. He was self-mastery over his lower-self.
The linking concept here is, the institutionalized personality feels “safe” by reacting to whatever is tangibly conceptualized and offered to it in it’s immediate sight… or hunger. That perception and hunger then “believes” without questioning.
We are in self-creation. A dream.
So in the realm of Spirit… among each person’s unconscious dream… linear time does not exist.
Time is not real folks. Not in the realm of God – the power of this universe.
Linear time as we know it through the window of personality, was created by early man so they could structure their survival and worship knowing the fortunate when to plant their crops and when to harvest, according to the cyclical nature, or cycles, that is this universe.
Time is the projection in the mind. The mind jumps between the past and the future, because we feel the need to be prepared for whatever is to come. And we really don’t need to. Whatever is to come – will come and will be dealt with, WHEN IT COMES. While time is a reflection of constant physical change in the environment, in a human mind it has become a significance of its own. Yet, an animal does not care for ,time’, because it does not ask existential questions about ‘what if’, ’if only’, etc. etc. Hence, no time, just life. Constant state of being.
Time goes down to point zero when truth takes hold of your being and you flow with this powerful turbulance to be PRESENT with something that is undeniable, all powerful and eternal.
Sometimes when we have these talks, at the end when we open our mouth…no more words flow out, there is this kind of silence and stillness, it’s not the kind where we don’t know what to say, but rather we have said enough, more words feels like its decoration rather than its foundation.
So in that silence let’s gaze at stars, or skies, or oceans, or mountain terrains, or Martian landscapes in our separate unity, listen to the wind, and whispers of our own blood pulsing through our vines…tell a joke next to the bonfire of traveler’s resting place…in doing so, finding that peaceful, noiseless island within….
When I was in my teenage years, my mother used to take me to her bible study group occasionally, I phase out most of the times, sometimes I would listen to some stories here and there, there was this one story, forgot about the ins and outs of it. It was about sacrifice, a man offered to God or Christ, he said I offer you the most precious thing I have to you as a symbol of my devotion and scarifies, I offer you the life of my child, my son. I remember I almost laughed… the notion was so ridiculous to me even back then… somewhere down deep, I have always known that you don’t “offer” what’s most precious to you, it had to be ripped off of your flesh, you’d be howling in agony…that’s what “precious” means… to me.
A lot of people in this world walked through their lives on auto pilot, not feeling the need and motivation to find out who they truly are… it is ok… having a chance to live a simple and undisturbed peaceful life in freedom… it was what warriors like William Wallace fought and died for… and for those who did walk through the journey… some of them have the chance to find within themselves, the uncompromising things… to them, what is worth dying for could be different, but nonetheless, precious.
These precious things, they exists within us, within the Cosmo as everything that was created, it’s just there. The Cosmo itself… and zeroed-into this form we walk in, our human form, life as we make a single choice of every minute of every day… do we turn left or do we turn right, do we go to here or do we go to there, do we take this job or that…. Every single choice shapes our life, every single choice is that moment that we decide our life… and sometimes, these decisions means… there is no right answer, we just have to make a choice one way or other, we just have to decide.
I have wondered, if life has it that William Wallace had to make a choice between Murron and his walk to lead his people to freedom… what would he chose? I saw the choice he made when he was but a simple and humble tribes man… but what if when he no longer is that simple tribe’s man, he is someone who carries responsibility of the innocent and their trust on his shoulders… what would he chose then?… It’s almost no mystery… being who he is, what his choice would be…. Aye… the feeling of carrying the life of innocence on your shoulder, of the weight of your own integrity… the uncompromising things… and make a choice… live with that choice, known the fruit and consequences for the action you took… face it with unwavering gaze…carry the pain and joy of your choices… when whichever turn you make, a choice means whichever way you turn, you have to give up on something precious… what do you chose?
There was a movie not long ago about a virus outbreak that killed millions of people worldwide, the program director, when he had the chance, he warned the woman he love before he can warn everyone else, he took the vaccine that was offered to him first and gave her a shot before everyone else’s fair chance… he did all these things without remorse… then he took the shot meant for himself and walked to the cleaning man’s house and vaccinated his son… what does it all mean? What is love in its many forms? The butcher and his friends told me: if you have seen what survival, aggression, fear, anger, and greed do to human beings here, then you should feel such profound bliss to have the chance to be able to live a dignified life if you so chose to… you should feel lucky…
I do feel lucky, deeply grateful for all that life has given me and with every choice I make to live out that gratitude. I am grateful.
I chose to love and live in ways I can, and forgive myself in ways I can’t.
William Wallace fell in love with Murron. It was not a chioce to him. It was presented in the movie as instinctual and from his innards. Therefore, unquestionable and absolute. If he would known that she would have died the way she did, would he have acted differently? Because he would not have changed his innards …
Murron´s death and the way that she died – defenceless against the whims of “men” became the EVENT that awakened him and transformed him. Before that, his higher purpose was to love her instinctively not deviating from his own core being, of his expression of what love really was to him and her effect on him.
So, in a way, his truth through finding his higher purpose is hidden in her “death” and her (painful) absence in his life, and not in her “life”.
Freedom became worth fighting for and dying for.
The knowledge required to give a decent and worthy battle for freedom, was taken away from these people – because the “WILL” to fight was also attacked by not permitting extremes of emotions i.e. LOVE.
For example, attacking a man´s sense of manhood by obligating women to sleep with the English Lord, instead of her husband on her wedding night.
Kill the love in the people, and you have great slaves.
People overpower because they can. “I want” is the usual reason. So, in the face of “desire”, the concept of “I can´t” is not evaluated. The idea of FREEDOM becomes twisted as well. Meaning, while we are exercising our desires, we do feel as if we are free, right? The British here, felt “quite free” and viewed the Scottish as “hampering” their freedom. Let´s put some laws or a contract, and we have something legally binding. They base their freedom on having the muscle power, if someone breaks or transgresses “what those laws really represent”.
So, for me, it won´t matter how many battles are fought on the field and how many “William Wallaces” have to do battle, it still has not change the underlying hidden collective energy out there.
We are still blind to it. We mentalize it and surrender to the “known”.
How can such evilness (death, wars, sicknesses, rapes, slaughtering) be so visible and so “hypnotizing” so that we don´t even truly want to react to it??? And when you do react to it, you are facing your death.
It just seems like we are missing something….
It just seems that until we get to the SOURCE of unity, and feel the TRUTH of that…(and understand it and operate from it,) these battles will continue.
“People overpower because they can.”
Yes, they believe they ‘can’, an unconsciously realised behaviour, but can they really? Power over self (personal power) cannot be taken away, and if someone is deluded enough to think they are ‘overpowering’ us – well, we know better, don’t we?
This is what I meant when I said I’ve never met a man who would choose NOT TO (overpower). This, to me, would be A REAL DEMONSTRATION that a person possesses that rare commodity – personal integrity. Not a strict father who withholds his love if the kids ‘misbehave’… This ‘I can’t, based on choosing kindness instead, or, rather, because one cannot BE any other way…. No such man in existence. Perhaps, to ask a man of this is to ask him to relinquish his basic, primal, ego based identity… which is akin to personal death… for males. Women are LIGHT YEARS ahead of men there. So… there is no such thing as ‘being too kind’, like there is no such thing as being too pregnant. A truly spiritual person is kind, full stop. This is a litmus paper test, really, for me. He probably has not been born.
Combination of words ‘spiritual’ and ‘warrior’, to me, is an oxymoron. When a person has TRULY become (man or woman), in that timeless state of being, there are no wars to be fought anymore. There is no desire to ‘teach’ others anything, or ‘fight’ others, or ‘bring the Light’ into this world, or make others ‘face their darkness’. There is no wisdom in doing so. The state of Being grants one that knowing, among many others. The essence of the person (each God like inner person of us) is WAR-LESS. Has always been, he/she just didn’t know that until the moment of awakening. Anything else is an ego projection, disguising through mental gimmicks as a spiritual practice.. When one CANNOT and WILL NOT ego fight – one is truly living in a state of spiritual consciousness. Not many will achieve that. From that point of view my fights here are purely ego based, I’m not blind. Part of me stands aside, observes the action, shrugs her shoulders and says ‘You know exactly what’s taking place, why don’t you just be the Fish you are and let it be?’ But in THIS particular case it doesn’t seem to be the option available WITHIN me. Still, some things are meant to pan out a certain way, it is what it is. I accept whatever comes in.
“Combination of words ‘spiritual’ and ‘warrior’, to me, is an oxymoron.
When a person has TRULY become (man or woman), in that timeless state of being, there are no wars to be fought anymore. There is no desire to ‘teach’ others anything, or ‘fight’ others, or ‘bring the Light’ into this world, or make others ‘face their darkness’. There is no wisdom in doing so.”
It is very clear to see what blind world you are functioning in. Leave the logic, feeble criticisms and the goal of human perfection for topics not related with humanity.
That world of yours obviously isn’t the real world among human foible, human stagnation and manipulative control through relationships. The relationship of- Real, will be forever unknown to you.;)
Air heads write what you write. Literal perception is not Truth.
Hi Ines,
Spiritual Warrior….is actually the desire to have your own soul be the more stronger force than negativity, passivity or any other kind of adjective. Adjectives are empty states of being, because by their very definition, they limit. And pisces will understand that very well. It is the combination of our energies that make us who we are. In this case, we are in a scorpio forum, therefore, these martian transformative energies are definitely going to come out, by the same via, as the passive, go with the flow pisces energies do. It is unity that gives this deeper perception, as you already know and scorpionic energies refuse to turn their head away when the suffering of others, is literally our own suffering.
Scorpionic energies CONNECT with it and make it their OWN with the intention of lending their WILL POWER and energy, as the healing force, by forcing you to gain understanding of “the bad”. This means, scorpio is willing to merge with the “comfortable and the uncomfortable” in order to gain understanding, compassion, with the final result being “TO END IT”.
The desire to do something about it i.e. VERB, and not FLOW with it, makes the difference.
We are stuck using words and language here…but since we are using it, then yes, I feel that we should make every word count, even though there are some things that are simply can not be explained.
You are right, that there are men who only “think” that they can overpower. This is a disturbing sick use of their sexual energy. However, a woman who truly loves, is never overpowered. She is only “over-egoed”. We are not light years ahead of men, because we are nice and loving, because we truly don´t know how to love. Just be truly grateful for the gifts that you have received in your life, have that gratitude resonate throughout your whole universe, and you will see, that all the overpowering male egos, that you seem to be a victim of, will be grateful to you as well.
Radiate that from your soul.
Gatubela,
The story of William Wallace is in essence, a statement. It was not written and portrait to introduce noises in that simple and powerful strike of the uncompromising sprites and freedom. It could very well be written out that William never met Murron, he married someone like the french lady in a simpler form, and had a son he adores…he felt the void of not having a matching soul and real intimacy all his life…then he move back to his village, and met Murron… what would he do? in his integrity and purity of soul… what would he do?
Being who he is… it really doesn’t matter if it’s Murron’s death that awakened him, it could be a neighbor’s daughter…being who he is… he is incapable of watching on the side lines forever…he would of just acted… he would of walked on his journey of fighting for freedom eventually… it’s his essence and purpose… he can’t not answer to it one way or the other…
The hardest battle we ever have to fight and live with within ourselves, are the ones that have no right answers.
I feel that we awaken to our essence – it is not always alive within is, nor is it conscious. Events in our lives loosen the hold of sleep and dreams. We are enchanted and dulled by “comfort”.
As a generality, it seems that there is no problem making other people uncomfortable, by means of this same blind dullness.
The will to battle has to be dealt with subjectively and objectively. You have to KNOW your objective and not waver. That is connection to divine essence. That is also discipline, courage, mastery…
If I were to explain this to my daughter, I would say ” Overcome your fear of not being “comfortable”. You will see what you are. Don´t work all your life to be comfortable, because when the time comes that you may loose it, you won´t have any other skills in the uncomfortable part. Their is no balance.
The slavery is based on that…the fact that we are lacking in skills. We can´t defend ourselves, can´t survive in nature, can´t heal ourselves because we need our institutions to attend our every need. And we have alot of NEEDS. The system is based and fuelled, fundamentally on our own ignorance – which is the food of our society.
The idea of the fact that women first had to give themselves (their sexuality and innocence) to the “king” is significant, for the man who is not afraid to be uncomfortable and has developed other sensitivities i.e not ignorant.
William Wallace placed value on Murron. Which means that she was priceless for him.
“The slavery is based on that…the fact that we are lacking in skills.”
I feel that the slavery is based on a choice of comfort, physical comfort, over freedom. Freedom, in its true meaning, costs. In pain, discomfort, illness, early physical death. Freedom is a choice of very few. Real freedom is painful.
Surviving at its raw, ‘back to basics’ level is not for the faint hearted. Nature looks beautiful from a train carriage window, pretty and very romantic… but up close and personal it is cruel, unforgiving and favours the survival of the fittest.
Look at the people in the West, they prefer (!) swimming pools to real rivers and seas… they are as far removed from the raw pulse as it can go. And the world in its entirety is slowly evolving to be ‘Western’, because all want the comfort of the running water and a medical provision.
I had a fever in the tent, in the middle of nowhere, and no access to the hospital. It was MISERABLE. Can you blame people? Can one blame self when it is one’s own child in need of an operation? If my son didn’t have one – he would have been dead now. No contest for me.
“Can’t you guys FEEL that “slavery”?? You will always be a slave to those WHO KEEP YOU SAFE in their little world. The INSTITUTIONAL oppression among people ensures you will keep wanting and hungering for more– to survive.”
Slavery starts in the head. And ends there. That’s the only place to dig. If one absolutely loves the job they are doing (granted, a rarity) and makes it his/her own, with total abandonment… this is not slavery. This is being.
“A truly spiritual person is kind, full stop. ”
Kindness is the result of spirituality, but it is not spirituality. Just like death is. (Gandhi)
Love and death, are very chaotic forces….
“The idea of FREEDOM becomes twisted as well. Meaning, while we are exercising our desires, we do feel as if we are free, right? The British here, felt “quite free” and viewed the Scottish as “hampering” their freedom…”
Hmm.
The British soldiers and Scottish diplomats were not free men. Not… at… all. Not in an eternal cosmic sense with the Maker. They were merely survivors, puppets and Yes-Men to man’s believed myth. That fearful oppression is deeply among us everywhere today, if you can feel it and see it.
The freedom of eternity was bestowed within the nature and soul of William Wallace at birth. He did not learn freedom on the material plane. That’s the huge joke. He already had “it”. How? Immortal Courage. The courage of what exactly? The gift to willfully choose and direct the lower-sex desire of mankind mired and enraptured with the material attachments of man. Both the English unconscious dream and the Scottish nobles unconscious dream shared what together? The Scottish nobles were COWARDS. Just as the loveless English ideologies were behind their brittle hubris and material dominance. They were the same manifestation.
The Scottish nobles sold-out to the material enticements and egotistic myth of the British power. Pay attention to their (the nobles) reactions and doubts as they quibble and politic in fear of not getting their rightful “share” to survive. They believed… that the deceptions TO SURVIVE were noble… ha…. so they (the mind of man)… not God, failed the ascent into immortality with William Wallace.
This collective dream is right here today among us. And the abuse of darkness always has an excuse for it’s deeds. It has been this way since ego lost it’s way. Notice a simple thing for me. Who feels happy in their reality?
What I see is… the collective mortal ideas and hubris of the wealthy army, England… LURED the Scottish nobles “to Negotiate” as negotiating in their context during that time was met with enthusiasm. This weak response to tyranny simply meant one could edge-God-out… and survive.
The actual “Freedom” Wallace was born with, was the vision of the eternal soul and it’s free-will to slay darkness dead and lift it high to the light.
The Bondage and Deception England used to establish it’s power over others was the bondage of man’s world and his darkness manifested through theft, rape and murder, permanently on the personality plane today and forever.
Wallace’s life to me, was a symbol of accepting ones destiny regardless of the perils and sacrifices those journey’s may yield. It is INSTINCTUAL. Love.
The mortal personality of man and his scheming to dominate mankind in today’s corporate-political “jobs” world is no different. None. Just feel the collective personality sucking the life out of you in your Jobs people. Can’t you guys FEEL that “slavery”?? You will always be a slave to those WHO KEEP YOU SAFE in their little world. The INSTITUTIONAL oppression among people ensures you will keep wanting and hungering for more– to survive.
So in Wallace’s eternal spirit, he forever knew that.
And that’s why he did something about it. Not talk and stagnate.
“negotiate”? what do I want from you? from anyone on this form? from anyone in this world? their agreement or disagreement? LOL.
Please, do not settle for anyone like me or otherwise, have the decency to wait for your dream to come true, no one is meant to be carnage on your feet when you do meet her one day, and I wish you do, sincerely.
Ask yourself one simple question, how in the world do you even know I’m not doing anything about it?
peace.
Hahaha… JoJo,
A woman is simply supposed to be love. As I know you are love. I am only sharing what a True masculine force, or presence should (or could) do with his gifts if he pulled his head out of the sand and mastered himself for once.
So Gatubela…
After the rape and murder of Murron… Wallace unleashed his vengeance and killed the first unit of English rule in their village.
HE KNEW,… that after “the response”… the defiance… of killing the English Lord, that HIS MISSION, his destiny and life purpose was to become a much more collective and revolutionary journey.
So instead of being the protector of the women he loved in divinity… he knew his role on this earth plane was becoming a collective cause… that of freeing Scotland and creating their own independence.
You see… he understood the mentality of the English far deeper than the English knew themselves. He understood they would KEEP RAPING, ENSLAVING, STEALING AND MURDERING the peace and dignity of the Scottish people as they HAD BEEN DOING for two hundred years prior.
So he knew the fate of his life after the murder of his love. It’s as though he… again like in the movie 300…. was “not thinking”. He was manifesting through the intensity of the Source by confronting death. Because you see… he also had the ability to love.
Killing the English desire for heartless slavery was the literal perception of freedom shown.
Killing the English ideology of material-political hypocrisy (Cowardice) was the God ordained vision of freedom.
Spiritual Warriors understand cause and effect. It is true they also have the knowing of what the enemy stands for (or in truth, fails to stand for).
“Wallace unleashed his vengeance…”
It was not vengeance, for me. It was his attempt at balance, knowing his enemy very well. Anyone who is used to comfort will react in the same way. There is no rocket science to that one. Our history books prove it as well. LoL. What could he have done? Throw a hankie at them and say “pretty please”?
The abuse of darkness gave the english “life”…The higher evolved use of it, will just take it back to its rightful, divine place. Anyone who dares, can have access to this powerful energy.
He can be connected to his cosmos….but that connection must be complete. Try and talk to the average person and say “Yer not connected”…That does not mean anything to them.
Intense pain is what connects you and unites you. Our comfort loving egos will stand for nothing “nicer”, unfortunately.
“It is true they also have the knowing of what the enemy stands for (or in truth, fails to stand for).”
*sniffle….that statement feels like coming home.
So true…it reverberates in your very being, makes your teeth clench and stokes the soul fire burning through you.
Who they are not, the destruction they bring, the pain that they cause, while living comfortably…the hypocrisy that they live…You KNOW the treasonous essence they truly are.
In that case I feel foolish, honest and foolish, I do jump passionately to wrong conclusions! lol
“It was not vengeance, for me.”..
Ah but little Leo, don’t take the word vengeance literally.
Here… Wallace unleashed his — Justice.
Justice for the motivation of breaking the paradigm of their “lawful” enslavement.
Hahaha… lawful enslavement is riddled throughout the manifestations of man for his collective survival today. And his leverage over weak and innocent souls.
Hi P.Puppy…
ooofff…you are touching a sensitive spot with me…my own experiences in which I was forced to watch, powerless, while ex- husband threatened to destroy me, and began hurting my children. How they screamed for help as well and I could not do anything.
I can´t get over that in my soul, as much as I “try”. Somethings just should not have a blind, flow with the universe eye, turned on it. Because if you turn your soul´s eye away, you turn the devil to feast on the innocent and the defenseless. By devil, I do mean ex-husband.
Yes…you can not unslave yourself without the help of the divine. Something that helps you FEEL that there is actually a way to END IT and that ending it is worth dying for.
Everything that you WERE leaves you unequipped with the true way to end it, due to the fact that this energy is stagnant. It is strange how life can kill you and death can bring you back to the living.
“..The abuse of darkness gave the english “life”…The higher evolved use of it, will just take it back to its rightful, divine place. Anyone who dares, can have access to this powerful energy…”
Yes exactly. Daring. Courage. The Catalyst.
Ladies… In the little bubble known as your personal relationships out there… Persephone… always ask your belly feelings if the masculine person you are relating with, TRULY has courage and daring. Does he make your belly feel he has his own mind and sensitivity??
Or has your adult relating life thus far, been among males who are plainly indifferent and conforming in their being??
Where’s The Hero?
The Truth is always among us. If you look.
I don’t feel like anyone in the movie… most time I feel like the wind wanting to be human, trying very hard to be one. I watch people, enjoy them, absorbing their energy, it was never a question who I want to be, I want to be a woman, a mortal, live the gift of life… it is way too easy for me otherwise, to detach from everything and everyone, to give up this earthy form and vanish into the sky…but that’s not what I want at all. I do not like battles of opinions, the word uncompromising means I just have to remain silent to avoid these battles of opinions… but I want to relate, to share, to understand, so I need to explain.
Almost every day, I took a walk in the morning, on these walks I feel nature around me, and I ask myself questions. I take everything that I’ve seen, heard, felt, my actions, acts of others, understand what’s been said and done from all aspect of life, and gave myself all kinds of probes, scenarios and ask myself how would I feel, how would I chose… kind of like peeling onions, eventually I would reach the core, that’s where the uncompromising things are… and then I ask myself “why?”, because at the core it becomes apparent it is not just a choice, there is only one choice to make… I find myself this way in the maze of unnamed feelings, and connect it to the source… then clarity would come to me.
When I was with the Butcher and his friends, we ask the mob: how can you call it true compassion when you are only able to cry for the poor, but unable to cry for the rich?
There are origins of truth in this universe, then there is the origins of our own motivations… we can only find ourselves via unwavering gazing of self-knowledge, self-knowledge, not anyone else. Where do we connect to the origin of truth? (Which in essence is everywhere) So when we feel that we stop growing away from this form, that we stop expending via talking to certain people…when we feel truth in one way and switch it to the other a week later, what does it mean? To me it means we’ve closed ourselves off from the Cosmo, our origin of truth is limited to the origin of our motivations… watch the 2012 Olympic ceremony, you will feel the presence of the one in 2008, the past is everywhere act out in everything that is not, the 2012 ceremony is everything the 2008 one is not, therefore forget to be themselves. Where is the origin of truth? Where is the origin of our motivations? Walk away from shadows of things and people… watch ourselves unfold.
On the day William Wallace went to meet the Scott prince and his death, his brothers said to him: you know this is a trap don’t you? And William answered: I don’t have a choice don’t I? Why? Why doesn’t he feel he has a choice? Because he knows you don’t induce love, bravery, trust in the heart of anyone, the heart of a nation, the heart of humanity by acts of fear, betrayal, and mistrust. In these unconditional acts of honor, people can draw strength from the light in their own world and eventually act out their own bravery… I’ve lived this painful truth through my darkest years.
It doesn’t matter who they are… to me there is no enemy in people, I love them, I see enemy in people’s lie, acts and choices. I slay the deed, never the human being. So when William Wallace rode off to meet his destiny, his back is towards those he love and trusts, he asks for their understanding and acceptance, because they understood and accept. While he rode toward the scared, confused, and unhappy…that’s where he know his act of honor was truly needed.
He sees the face of the smiling Murron in his wave of pain, she was watching his execution, there was nothing but love in her eyes. she understood.
http://freedom1xpress.wordpress.com/2012/08/21/in-the-bright-sunshine/
Sleeping under the stars on a mercilessly hard ground, running under an agricultural sprinkler in 40 degree heat, not knowing where one ends up at the end of each day and six hundred miles of hard graft – does something to the mind. Things just… fall away. I said once I don’t dwell on the past and was accused of being shallow… I can’t help it that I don’t require anyone to wipe away my tears, not now anyway. Memories, those trace projections of what once was and is no more – cannot hurt, but they can surely screw up one’s head through anticipation of any POSSIBLE future sorrows…. The past sorrows and hurts are WITHIN us already, at a deep subconscious level, they attempt to dictate our reactions and behaviours. They attempt to control me IF I let them. I know of their existence, I accept them, but God forbid, analyze every last shred? NO. Feel them. Accept them. Move on. Or else it will become a never ending archeological psycho dig.
That is why I love being a Pisces. I live by the moment. As and when it happens – it is powerfully intense and vibrant. But at a cosmic level – things pass through me without HARMING my psyche and my being, without really touching my essence. All of the things that happened in my life – they are only external… happenings. Not me. This is not being shallow. This is about knowing that all there is of importance is THIS MOMENT. That’s why I cannot promise a ‘forever’. It does not exist in my universe. Only the moment does. The imaginary clock does not tick for me, ever.
My life is already perfect as is. Every unfolding moment is what counts. When I observe my mind attempting to lead me astray – all becomes blank, an existential relief.. I feel every heartbeat. From a sick feeling in my stomach becoming the swirling of thoughts in my head, to a mighty feeling of relief when each matter is resolved/dealt with, the fears will never go away completely. I want to keep confronting my fears, not the people who enjoy digging them up. To me, fighting people is shallow and ego based. It can have many guises: for the Truth, for the King, for the Love, for the Justice, for the Principle, but ultimately it is still – a bloody fight. Shallow. If I got sucked into it through my unconsciousness – a lesson to learn.
“As and when it happens – it is powerfully intense and vibrant. But at a cosmic level – things pass through me without HARMING my psyche and my being, without really touching my essence.”
For sure… I absolutely believe nothing touches your essence or “harms your psyche” in the world of relating.
Tell that escapist whim of your “essence” to an entire species of wildlife about to be destroyed (Die) from an avalanche, a flood, a drought, a blazing fire…. Tell that whim to the millions of human beings who will DIE and/or suffer in their life no matter what their..aghm!.. “cosmic level”… is.
You are not cosmic. Nor eternal. Nor Free. You are in prison. Thanks to the bondage and comfort of your own foolish mythos. You are the perfect exhibit of what a Pisces delusion is, directly here to an audience
You are Escapism….nothing more, nothing “spiritual”… from real, unstoppable visceral pain within yourself– your prison. Your escapism from unstoppable “dark” energies through the realization of the fear you experience of immanent physical death
That toxic Virgo rising cynicism inadequately blinds you from the outer to the inner of eternity. All you do is RUN (escape) from what is turbulent and transforming and strengthening and loving between humans. For that purity of illusion in your head must mean “harm” in your airhead.
Go sailing way out to sea next time. Experience AN ALMIGHTY STORM which could flip your boat like you were AN INCONSEQUENTIAL speck of NOTHING… that’s right… Physically nothing… then… tell us all about the purity and pain-free peaceful Pisces ocean you preach. Keep your perfections and false idols of peace among this HUMANITY away from me and this forum.
The Spiritual Warrior is what he/she IS, for a reason.
I want to FEEL the cosmos…and I strive to have what it takes to be able to do that.
You seen to have a picture of Eden, with plump sheep and yummy goodies. Am feeling unicorns farting rainbows again.
What is living by the moment? Every energy that you have mentioned in your previous post, has a demon to name it.
….superiority…laxity….lies….hypocrisy….
With nothing touching your essence, I have to wonder “who you really are not”….
If nothing here touches your essence, here, then nothing will “there”.
The physical expression of the “nothing touching your essence” has its SOURCE in the cosmos. Meaning, humanity has kindly placed suffering, anguish, despair and treason, in these collective energies. They will be a part of it. To deny it, is to escape from it, and to do that, is to STAND for separation, division.
“That’s why I cannot promise a ‘forever’. It does not exist in my universe…”
That is simply another exhibit of the rational, literal, earthly limited personality speaking what it “thinks” it knows.
Hey.
Forever….IS….the Moment.
The Moment……IS…. Forever.
We ARE…. our thoughts.
This includes the ABSENCE OF LOVE — In our thoughts.
I find it magical and wonderful how the wholeness in my past comments to Gatubela about 3 years ago… reunites with itself here in the present.
As you are aware, you will never know spirit — Eternity of INTRICATE CONSCIOUSNESS… connecting…. all the details of your life experience into….>>> the Mind of God.
Your are personality. Why panic? That is your life path in this body. Just enjoy what you have.
You are human. It’s OK, there are billions of you’s to share each others personality reality above ground and play and celebrate. You don’t have to worry or even try to be different. The conformity of your ‘home’ (the deeply embedded crystallization of your psyche) is safe and harmless among the interaction of your massive flock. = Home among like minds.
Now consider where I must find my ‘home’?
The Other Side, is where I am free and immortal at home. The proof is written from what lives richly within me. Your criticisms can’t tolerate that.
Be well.;)
Of course forever IS the moment. String them together. That girl which broke one’s heart – is still loved (universally, huh). Except… where is she now? Where is that ‘forever’? Has the reality of it lasted into the sunset? So… please don’t twist the meaning into something else entirely. I meant in one context, and one context ONLY.. There ARE literal understandings, and there ARE esoteric ones.
“The proof is written from what lives richly within me. Your criticisms can’t tolerate that.”
I love what lives richly within you. But the proof is NOT in the writings, darling. I can write, remember your comment on Dana? The proof, to me, is when words are supported by actions. Universal Consciousness demands total integrity. Yes, Christ had reactive moments, that was the exception, a manifestation of his humanity. Not the rule of the daily pounding of all there is around him.
You don’t CHOOSE to react. Your personality is compeled to. I know because I predict what you will react to, and what you will calmly discuss. And you always do. That’s fine. No critisism. Just observation. You have all the tools within to be love. So… BE love. Battles are started and stopped, don’t let those go on forever, there is no need. You overkill. Just ask yourself from time to time ‘Is it the time to stop? Is it NOW?’
I listen to my inner self. Very carefully. I guess this is where I differ from you and others… peace already IS. Peace is not fought for. Having that moment of enlightenment comes through a battle, OR THROUGH AN EXTREME CIRCUMSTANCE, true. Through battle we arrive at peace. After that – no need to battle with OTHERS. When personality transcends – there is simply no compulsion to enforce one’s will/ego on others. There is no need to become even a bigger brat than a woman you are dealing with. A spiritual journey will bring battles – with self. Only. I don’t feel you’ve reached that stage yet. The only person, from my observations on here, who truly posesses generosity of the spirit – Gatubela.
I have known Spirit. But will I ever BECOME Spirit? Will you ever arrive at peace? We are all in the state of Becoming. Never say never. As I said to you before – the fear (anxiety) of not being is gone. Gone, baby.
Anyway, thank you for exhibiting humanness and control in this last post. I understand calm assertiveness much better than spirited, but empty reactions. My affection for you will not change. Your soul is beautiful and your personality is that of a contrary ‘son of a …….’. That’s who you are, both of those, not one. Like all of us. Human. Divine. And that’s OK.
Be well too, darling
Ness
“Will you ever arrive at peace?…”
For the millionth time. I am my nature. Which you will never grasp. And my nature— is not a peaceful game of denial all the illusory time.
You have no ability to see my reality as it exists for me. So stop telling me what I should be through your rose colored glasses! Your wish for white dove utopia all the damned time is a shameful reflection of your horribly disillusioned perceptions of this flawed and deceitful world of people. Including the deceit that lives within you.
For many years, I was the guy who believed in people unflinchingly. I shared my joyful spirit with them, loaned them money, trusted them, befriended them blindly… And for what!!??
If I had stayed in that Pisces nirvana, I would not be the man I am today and the man I am becoming. I would not be here writing on a forum.
You are the archetype of a lost, afraid and desperate creature who will not honor my choices. Because once again, you are clueless to my nature.
How do I know?
Because you have in the past, and are still expressing it yet again, the unconscious ideas and rigidity of manipulation means to love. You are not awake. I see your dissolution and the cancer it creates within me.
You have know idea of the boiling wrath I must keep still in me because of that truth I see in you.;)
“peace already IS. ”
“The only person, from my observations on here, who truly posesses generosity of the spirit – Gatubela.”
Dualistically, the opposition of peace is >>>>war. We can´t achieve balance, unless we understand both.
Ines, I did explain that P.Puppy´s honesty did feel like coming home…
Which is why when you are in the presence of this kind of masculine energy, you have every reason to be generous.
Kitty can just bask in it and be herself…
Gatubela,
I love this expression of yours – ‘over-egoed’… describes with accuracy my history on here.
It is strange you talk about gratitude, because this feeling has not left me for the last two months or so. I really feel grateful for being GIVEN a life, just to start with. Any kind of suffering and adversity, in hindsight, has been a blessing which allowed me to move forward, not stagnate. If I was so afraid of changing, and changing myself and my life on a regular basis, – I would have been in a much darker place, both physically and psychologically. I burned a lot of bridges in the past. People. Countries. Relationships. Marriage. Accommodation. Jobs. Occupation. Cities. Interests. A lot. I have Pluto and Uranus both in the First House of personality. My passport to change, no matter how violent. ‘Go with the flow’ has not been my motto. And I see now that it SHOULD have been. It truly should have been that inner attitude, a true reflection of my inner nature..
I’ve felt the Cosmos since the day I was born. My path is not yours, dear Gatubela, and what I feel and see is not what you do feel and see. So please talk about ‘farting unicorns’ with someone else, it serves no purpose at all, other than giving ‘labels’. You are quick to jump to conclusions. Look inside of yourself, please. Search really hard. Found a label on you with my handwriting on it? No? Have the grace to pay in kind, why clone yourself to the man’s modus operandi? If I give labels to anyone on here – I am accused of being egotistic and fake and out of control. And if you do? And if the man does? Ah, I hear you say, those are not labels, but soulfully expressed Truths… OK.
When I say ‘my essence’… well… does your true essence, who you truly are – changes with each passing event? The God part of you? True essence of us is exactly the same, unlike personality. This is what I mean when I say my essence does not get harmed. It cannot. There is no denying the suffering. There is a difference between suffering and wallowing in suffering. What has started here – has taken me INTO my essence. It has not changed it, it has not touched it, it was already as is – perfect and eternal.
Have you ever felt an overwhelming sense of inner peace and joy? Emanating from within? When you suddenly knew that no matter WHAT happens in your life – is inconsequential, compared to THAT? How come that no one seems to understand the meaning of inner serenity? If, on some rudimentary level, I was given that from birth – I don’t feel ashamed or sorry about feeling that. It has been my shield, in all life situations. So how can THAT be harmed? You tell me.
“Spiritual Warrior….is actually the desire to have your own soul be the more stronger force than negativity, passivity or any other kind of adjective.”
Yes. Absolutely. Not a desire to battle. And it can be put into practice only by soulfully accepting what is in front of us first, each living moment as it comes. Before mentally wondering into the past or the future and flavouring the moment with the fears of those past experiences. Take it for what it is… change it…. or walk away… There is no more to it. And I don’t have to explain this anymore. I hope that answers your question about living in the moment. Whatever energies you’ve mentioned – look at those again please.
My picture of so called Eden (although you failed to ask what that picture of mine is, just assumed the farting) is what spiritual seekers are looking for. The Christ energy. There is a FRACTION of the world population which actually has felt it and now is living it. The rest are intellectualising about it, with no true awareness, because they never did feel it on a profound level.
I am a spiritual novice, a nobody. I don’t claim to HAVE BECOME. My writings reflect that. To be threatened to be ‘iced out’ (‘if you do this – I will do that’ is a threat) from someone supposedly in a state of becoming for five years…. hmmmmm… Is five years not enough to drop the (Outer) feeble form? No?
Gatubela, you will be advised, no doubt, not to talk to me next. If I could have a penny for every prediction that came true here…. It’s OK. I am talking to myself anyway. I am beginning to understand that what I may feel and see is not a given for others. If the folks cannot know it – so be it. I am grateful to have a chance to express myself, that’s all.
Hi Ines,
Well, I can not say that I am fully aware of every little detail of my essence. But from what I have felt, yes, it does change. Essence is not stagnant…it is raw energy. The VERB.
I did not label by saying farting unicorns…I said I felt it. It is coming from a place of sincerity…if you have the gift of flowing to yours, then all the best to you. It did not resonate with me, because I was actually not only thinking of me.
I guess inner serenity would be nice to have, but only before the battle, meditating on it, calming my breath down feeling the kanji…strength, feeling the energies, feeling the harmony and striving to tune in and go beyond myself, in order to have clarity and feel the energies, because that Eden that you say spiritual seekers are looking for, will have to be fought for, on this earth. Inner serenity also, after the battle, to feel love again, beauty, joy, kindness..which would be the results of my spirituality. Kindness is not my “religion” nor is inner serenity.
The problem is that Eden can not be “sought” for…hahaha! How did we loose our way in the beginning?
My whole experiences have shown me, that when someone tries to fight for truth and Justice, (and not SEEK it) on a collective level, for someone else, not just for our own inner utopic subjective and comfy Eden, an attempt at murder will definitely be made.
A spiritual warrior probably is something so much beyond us, that we can´t explain it in this forum. Respecting your path that you say is not mine, if you don´t understand battle and its consequences, the reasons why we engage, the ALL that it takes to be able to do this, and the consequences that this brings to you, and are willing to pay for, then we really can´t continue on this line of conversation. Someone has to do the dirty work, and I guess your ignorance is bliss.
P.Puppy knows that kitty does what she feels….she is not an expert on depth of feeling, but what she does feel, she tries to go through with, mistakes and all. I know he appears to be a bit grumpy and his feathers seem to be a bit battle scarred and scruffy, but he has never shown himself to be a bad guy to me. His battles and what he is actually battling for, speak louder to me, because its hidden energy tweaks at my heart and soul.
I understand that you may have your reasons to be a bit snippy, but those reasons are not mine. His effect on you, definitely is not the same one on me. I am not fully understanding the negativity. Probably, I am missing something very fundamentally feminine here.
“To be threatened to be ‘iced out’ (‘if you do this – I will do that’ is a threat) from someone supposedly in a state of becoming for five years…”
I had noticed that he said that. Is this not between you and him?
P.Puppy and I do not always feel the same way about things, our unique individual differences are not viewed as a threat – if anything, they are only enriching. I can only be curious and feel a bit of joy at this strange situation.
Ummmm…actually, probably me and the whole forum is curious as to the sudden interest in his “heat”…why is it so threatening that you loose it?
“hmmmmm… Is five years not enough to drop the (Outer) feeble form? No?””
Well, with regards to this comment, I do feel that you need to look in the mirror. Again, if you don´t understand battle, then an eternity won´t be enough to loose your ego. Since your previous comments have indicated that you have been writing mails to his email, then perhaps you need to deal with this directly with him, instead of attempting to involve me in your feeble form as well.
Thank you, Gatubela, your post explains a lot.
I feel you are right in that our respective ‘religions’ (please do not take it literally, I don’t have one) make us strive for completely different things. I will battle with self, but it is a private battle in that I have no desire to take that to the Outer world and attempt to change others. My energy levels and substance are not of that purpose, and it feels ultimately fake to me to do so in a purposeful manner – as I am. Hence, our paths are different.. You, dear Gatubela, change me ever so slightly each time we talk – because you do not impose. I guess this is the only language I understand. This is the only language Eagle understands too. We don’t speak it really, unless it is spoken to us first. At least here, in this virtual environment.
Strange, because I feel my essence as One and not really belonging to me at all. So far I felt it as part of a bigger something. But it may change, not long since I’ve known. What exactly did you mean when you said ‘an attempt at murder would have been made’?
I understand the meaning of battle. The battles here are ego battles on BOTH sides. When one side claims to be able to relate on a soul level And wacks me with personality instead. I find that amusing, but also disturbing, not for my sake.. It’s very simple: we do not trust each other’s AUTHENTICITY. Both feel that the other party lies, somehow. Why? I don’t know. It is just a feeling. There is nothing more to it. Yet, we both know the true other, beyond the altercation and conflict and personalities clash. Hence, all that aggressive caring.
Since you mentioned… there is no bad guy here. Never has been. There is a guy who has never truly known peace. Who has only known war in all relating throughout life. That’s three decades of battling… I am sorry for that. Not a poke. Nothing of the kind. I truly truly am sorry.
“If I give labels to anyone on here – I am accused of being egotistic and fake and out of control. And if you do? And if the man does? Ah, I hear you say, those are not labels, but soulfully expressed Truths… OK.”
Yes…The Christ energy. OK…you envision this without knowing battle? It may bring peace, but it is not peace itself. His own violent death, frought with treason, governments and opposing cultures, is evidence to this. He brought out the best and the worst in people, in a collective and subjective sense.
As per the scriptures, he was fully aware that he was going to die and how terrible it would be.
There are certain things that he did react to – he could not help his own reaction as these truthes resonated so strongly that he could not turn a souls blind eye to it. They won´t be the same for everyone, but he threw out a couple of accusations himself.
“we do not trust each other’s AUTHENTICITY.”
No, this does not resonate. How can you comprehend the authenticity of someone else? You only sense that the truth is there. In your case, that would actually mean “loosing ego” and battling, in order to get to the essence. You would be left with an intangible. A divine unconditional. A “do not touch my soul” energy.
How do you authenticate something that you know can transform?
For me, there are very few things that are trustworthy, and someone´s essence, is one of them. Authenticity is not. Why should he authenticate himself? Everything you are, should prepare you to be able to feel the truth, if one exists…somewhere. You will fight for it.
This is something that you of course, refuse to do, since “battle” has never been your intention.
The Christ energy demands that you must have every intention of getting out of the abyss, before going for a swim in that ocean. Because it is going to be ouchie. You must have the tools to be able to feel love and heal. If you don´t, then you must have the ability to feel someone who does. These abysses are always about who you are, and choosing light and love –
Brand names and designer labels, authenticate – and people blindly lend their trust to what exactly? It is superficial to have “I is real” pasted on our asses.
“Ummmm…actually, probably me and the whole forum is curious as to the sudden interest in his “heat”…why is it so threatening that you loose it?”
I honestly do not understand what you meant here, Gatubela. Heat? Whose interest? Loose what? I felt that the stupid agenda thing was perceived as a threat for God knows what reason – and caused that ice out comment. It is not important, not to me. My integrity is important to me, at any cost. And you reminded me of it. You are absolutely right, I shouldn’t discuss anything of the matter with anyone, it was naive on my part to feel that I can use it as an example of how a person contradicts their spiritual teachings…. not attempting to involve you in my feeble form. I do apologise.
My previous comments never brought up any question of correspondence, it was done by the other party, for reasons known only to him.. I don’t want to discuss it except to say I have ‘gone away’ as requested. No more comment.
Thanks, Gatubela, gives me something to reflect on.
Well…because being “iced out” is not a threat in a true sense. Every meanie expert knows that!
I did not say you should not discuss it with anyone. I just feel that you should discuss it, with him.
LoL…if he were not such a soulful person, he would not be bringing out all of these feminine reactions here out in the forum.
War is for me, the essence of Christ energy…and peace is the result of his battles. Maybe there were not so much casualities – but we certainly do see evidence of a civil war.
Everything you do, must be sincere and in humility, feeling your own energies, respecting them and loving them. Believe, this is extremely painful and not for the faint hearted. Therefore, in sincerity, there is no evil. It won´t matter if you like it or not. The depth of perception – be it light or dark, it an objective and divine equality. Only balance is required.
P.Puppy does not feel imposing to me. I don´t know why. I feel blessed that he dares to be honest and conflictive energies are not a problem for me. This honesty is what gives me the inner soulful serenity to say the things I am saying. It feels like coming home to a resonating inner truth.
I guess eagles are a bit different with cats…we don´t feel the same things a fish do…
Hahaha… Gatubela thank you.
While observing that ‘natural’ interaction happening…the Consciousness which I received from observing that moment, was this:
— The first cat TRUSTED the Eagle, as it did not run or flee from it. Not run off…Considering…. that the cat instinctively “knew”… that the Eagle, all Eagles are the ultimate predator. The first cat sat there fascinated by the Eagle. Mesmerized.. as the Eagle glared INTO him.
— Now the Eagle…did not run (or fly away) either. Considering… that cat had waited in a pouncing position very close and in view of another bird… yes had that been…ANY OTHER BIRD… that bird… would have instinctively flown off immediately> Knowing that the cat is a natural predator of yummy bird species.
— The second cat who was “drawn in” to the energy of the moment by the fascination of a potential easy meal (in his cat mind)…hahaha… Because the second cat actually thought the Eagle was ‘stupid’ by not fleeing!! HAHAHA.
— When IN TRUTH… the Eagle had stayed there because HE KNEW of his power. And he used his power WISELY by not Killing the cats either. I fell he loved them by not killing them. He knew “their innocence”. He stayed and shared a hello with two cats who would normally attack any other bird species brazen enough to sit there with them.
Fascinating stuff, to me. Thanks for sharing.
Love
Pluto
Hahaha…and of course the circumspect Eagle naturally surveyed behind himself and below himself in his loving stature as a precaution to any other cats whom may have the innocent ignorance to ambush him from behind. He sees all.
As with the Eagle itself, my ‘still’ nature is emotionally/psycho laser-focused and circumspect. This is why and how I know this bird’s nature all the way down to the atom. But circumspect from me in a human body… does not mean I do not love others. Circumspect means through my world… I enable my predatory soul DISCERNMENT of others divinity… or mostly their fear of love (divinity).
The Eagle innately knows that this earthly realm is cruel and opportunistic (hungry &afraid) in terms of fundamental survival. Eagle knows creatures scurrying everywhere around him (people) WILL DO ANYTHING for themselves… when they are afraid and out of their comfort zone and starving. e.g (not pretty enough, not rich enough, not confident enough, not intelligent enough, not successful enough, not praised and coddled enough).
That’s why mortals fear suspicious, “desperate” people in positions of power. Such as your abusive boss, or your austere father, or your belittling father, or your cheating husband or boyfriend who were the epitome of that masculine weakness with little to zero mastery over their seed (sex) desire. Because the power (mind-heart-soul consciousness) has been repressed and distorted FOR PURE SELF-INTEREST and fear ONLY in that abusive male figure, simultaneously toward themselves and toward females throughout their life.
There has not been (from the masculine core in man) an intrinsic reverence and support for the power of feminine sexuality. Men have stolen that divine virtue, thus the desire and obvious abuse of power in our mortal world.
That power (available to all who seek it) is Not the manifested “knowing” of SELF-MASTERY seen through the deed of the Eagle.
Human nature is that simple folks.
Well…the Eagle did not kill the first cat, but he could not resist a nibble…
I want to say something, but in the end I don’t really know what to say… Pluto, Bella, you are two brave individual who in essence are what Cosmic bravery is all about, you are open to truth, recognize Joy and freedom and humanity when it comes into your consciousness…there is no barrier, no resistance, no twisting of truth… the rest.. it matters less, what we know at any given moment is always limited and it should be, life is a life long discovery and expending, so the eternal Cosmic love is already all inclusive, all forgiving. what it offers us, is a certain kind of Joy, forgive ourselves for our unknowing, of the past, present, and future… Feel love embracing the pain within… it is the Cosmo, you are the beautiful part of it…sometimes I feel choked up with words, sometimes when we close our eyes, do you feel the embrace of love and understanding?…then, it is enough.
Sweetheart thank you. You’ve made us better people too by being brave.
Love
Pluto
Hi Jo Jo…
*sniffle
*meow
I want to tell a love story… it happens at the deathbed of an old woman, narrated through the eyes of the granddaughter; the granddaughter wasn’t very close to her grandmother. To her she was a quite woman who was rather silent. And one night, the grandmother seemed different, she was happy, had a girlish glow to her complexion. She was so out of sort the granddaughter feared her time has finally come, and she was right, before the granddaughter got up to fetch someone, the grandmother stopped her… she held her hand, asked if she wanted to hear a story, never seen her grandmother so lively and glowing, the young girl was mesmerized and sat down. The grandmother started… “when I was still young, I married you grandfather and had your father, one day, it was a day like any other day, I remember it has just stopped raining that day after it rained for many days, the cherry blossom was at its peak but snowed to the ground… I remembered every single thing happened at that moment, the color of the cloth I was hanging, the smell in the air, the sound of your father playing, dogs barked at the distant… it was a normal day like any other day, I was hanging cloth in the yard, and I heard horse hoofs pounding… I turned, still flushed from my labor…and I saw a rider passing the fens of my yard, he was riding a brown horse, wearing dusty cloth from his travels… he passed my fens in a slow fluid blurr… then he stopped, he turned his horse around and ride back slowly, he just sat on the horse and looked at me… I can’t really see his features clearly; it was distorted from his travels and fatigue. He sat on his horse and looked at me. I saw something in his eyes I have never seen in the eyes of other men, not before, not after. He has eyes that recognized me, I wasn’t pretty that day, I hadn’t been pretty for a long time by then, but he looked at me like he looked at something he didn’t know he was looking for and had finally found…. We stand there and looked at each other for an eternity or just a second…I didn’t know, nothing makes sense but everything made sense, I knew it then, why I was never truly happy… He looked at me, and he tilted his head and looked at my son playing innocently near my feet…for another eternity, I saw tears run down his cheek washing a line of paler skin beneath, and he turned his horse, rode slowly then gallop away… it was then I felt the tears on my face too, why did I cry? It was the happiest moment of my life….
The granddaughter waited, when she didn’t say anything more, asked “and then?” the grandmother smiled, she smiled so prettily and with her frail hands touched the granddaughter’s cheek “…there is no then… this is my love story.”
The granddaughter eventually murmured “…I’m sorry…”
“Why? I have found him didn’t I? Now, I’m finally going to see him, or wait for the day, he came to see me…”
That night the grandmother died, it was the prettiest death the granddaughter has ever seen for the rest of her life.
…When we are born into this world, the Cosmo gave us something that nothing in this world will be able to touch, not men, not law, not anything that has hands… it was our heart and mind and soul. These are things born free, will die free. When and if the moment of recognition came, there is nothing tangible in this world able to stop or contain or distort how we feel. We CHOOSE our DEEDS, but our heart and mind and soul, are forever free. The games and goals and soulless existence that is the creation of men, seeks ownership more than anything else. The French lady would eventually have said to William Wallace “but she is dead, and I am alive.” William would have answered “there are times amongst living when death are more desirable than life”.
Apollo said to me “what you look for does not exist, no one at our age is as naive as you, at this stage of people’s life everyone is complicated, everyone has agendas, you just don’t understand people as I do.” I said to him “but I exist don’t I? that’s how I know what you said is not really true.”
Joy, love, understanding… these things, when we truly have them, our choices are what to do with what we have, it is when we don’t have the strength of them, that we live in the need to proof its existence within us.
Pluto, I understand, I understand loving those who cannot feel love, nor are they able to give it. And watching ourselves become part of their world in the necessity of having to relate there. I understand LOVE, eternity, and recognition. I understand dreams and when we connect to the source of the joy available in the Cosmo, and moments are forever. In the moments when eagles fly in the blue wide sky, the sense of where it belongs, freedom is where it belongs.I understand to the ocean storms are what is peace, it’s only to men it means devastation. I understand it is not what’s been said that’s important but what’s been perceived, so in perceiving love and truth, words are powerless.
On the night I cried and hasn’t slept, a lot went through me, I understood it is my choice that dedicated the path I walk, not really the other way around, so what to do with the freedom of my soul within the choice of my deed, is my act and willingness… of what to do with my love. I understood when honors are given to the unhappy, what is given to the honorable is the rest of the truth. In the spoken and unspoken, Pluto, I understand.
Namelessly and unconditionally, love, as love is born into this world.
Love,
jojo
” I understand it is not what’s been said that’s important but what’s been perceived, so in perceiving love and truth, words are powerless.”
YESSS.
You are eternal.
..and now you are Free.
Just through being who you are, JoJo… the divine has blessed you with all the rewards you will ever need in this lifetime. Continue on your path of courage, sweet soft love and prudence with others, sweetheart,
Never lose sight of your exquisite femininity, the gifts which you now embrace, the nurturing and beholding all that is sacred within you.
Embrace your wonderful loving nature fully and boldly… but do not fear those who aim to drain you of that goodness. We are social creatures. Reptiles are out there. Now that you are aware of the truth through perceived intention, God will take good care of you.
Never lose sight of who you are.
You bring water to my eyes too. It is pure happiness.
Love
Pluto
Why can we not relate to one another, Eagle? What is the stumbling block? Our personalities? Our opposing perceptions? Is it because I do not poetically submit all there is on the altar of your compassion? Because I refuse to expose my emotional world? All we do is ‘throw lampshades’ at each other. I am tired of this nonsense. Words, and nothing real.
“For many years, I was the guy who believed in people unflinchingly. I shared my joyful spirit with them, loaned them money, trusted them, befriended them blindly… And for what!!??”
If people took advantage of your spirited Scorpio and naive Piscean natures – I am sorry…. I cannot comment on your experiences, other than what’s inside of you now – comes from a place of darkness, colder than ice, the result of experiences you have attracted throughout life. It fills me with your past pain, and the feeling is chilly and uncomfortable… But it was then… Do you then carry it forward by saying ‘I am passionately going to show each one of you just how much darkness and misery lives within all of you. I will do it so that you don’t abuse others, as I was.’? And… has it stopped people from abusing one another in your world?
“Your wish for white dove utopia all the damned time is a shameful reflection of your horribly disillusioned perceptions of this flawed and deceitful world of people.”
Hmmm…. I understand your turbulent nature, although no one can feel your reality the way you do. Conflict is what you need in this life to feel alive – and people are very reluctant generally to conflict. Remember ‘The Fightclub’ where the men deliberately tried to pick up fights with strangers, and no one wanted to?. I just feel conflict is not the end of your story, and not where you will end up. My White Dove Utopia is also yours, just look back at some of your writings… It comes from realising that there is more to people than deceit and flaws. If YOU DIDN’T KNOW IT TOO – you wouldn’t be fighting for Humanity, because your fights are appeals for Love. As I said – you are impossibly idealistic at your core. Rose coloured glasses are not unfamiliar to you. So…. what exactly is the opposition between us? Huh? I cannot NOT trust people, regardless of my life experiences. That’s who I am. Why do you scorn at it? I trust in full awareness of the possibility of deceit. And you know… there have been very few occasions when the deceit actually took place. Maybe I am luckier than you. Or maybe I attract different kind of people. I don’t know.
“You are the archetype of a lost, afraid and desperate creature who will not honor my choices.”
Gosh…………. what’s that about? You feel….. rejected!?? Am I so utterly inept at expressing myself? Your choices ARE you, and you ARE your choices. Just because I probe your inner and outer nature – doesn’t mean I don’t honour it. I’ve accepted your choices, but not BLINDLY, that’s all. If I said you overkill and never had peace – it doesn’t mean I am asking you to change. The more we fought – the more I learned about THE MAN behind words. I wanted to know the personality of the man too, because this is the one that’s tripping us both here and stopping us from relating to each other, as is mine. Some of the biggest so called ‘enlightenment gurus’ out there have the biggest egos in existence. This is why they are grappling with the truth of themselves. I wanted to know yours inside out. And you let me. Why sulk now?
“You have know idea of the boiling wrath I must keep still in me because of that truth I see in you.;)”
I do, darling. As much as you’ve maintained in the past to be placid and in control of your passions – you feel them, as do I. Why do you even care? You don’t have to protect me from yourself. If you decide to go psycho (Scorpio mode) on me – I will look for anything constructive in it. In the absence of it – I will simply wait for you to stop rattling. The question is… do you really want to waste your energy in that way? If, however, you need a release…. go ahead if you have to. You know we cannot harm each other. Ever.
I am tired of ‘explaining’ myself, Eagle. It’s not relating. You want 100% heart wrenching emotional exposure from each woman you communicate with. In return they will get a few words of encouragement, a pat on the back and an inclusion into the family. Followed by some Teacher/Pupil mode interactions… No emotional investment from YOU whatsoever. Your control of the energy flow here is absolute. All the positive energy is accepted and flows YOUR way. All the negative energy you repel with your considerable own. Your own positive energy expenditure is a few degrees above absolute zero (that includes pats on the back). That’s a fantastic distribution… for you. That’s how it FEELS to me. Call me all the names under the Sun, but this is not relating either. It’s…. covert vampiring.
I am tired, darling. I am sorry we cannot find a common ground. Let’s love each other at a distance. Silently. It really is enough.
“My White Dove Utopia is also yours, just look back at some of your writings”
This does not resonate….the reason is that any truth, will be found in the threshold, and not in the extremes.
These truthes are not for the faint of heart, because the energy beyond conflict, requires incredible self knowledge and surrender.
“the energy beyond conflict, requires incredible self knowledge and surrender.”
Yes. He is aware of what lies within me. That’s why there is no rejection, Gatubela. I am simply given a chance to search for it and find it… The Eagle will never betray. He will step aside and remain observant, to let us find the answers for ourselves. That’s love. When I feel that – I respond. And I feel it now, coming from the man. When of course it should have been me. But that’s why the battles. Like you said, the truth is found in the threshold, not in the extremes.
And that’s why we need silence.
I am tired of ‘explaining’ myself, Eagle”
No explanations are required from my side…
“Some of the biggest so called ‘enlightenment gurus’ out there have the biggest egos in existence.”
You take whatever comes your way and you use the rationality of it, in order to attack using sincerity and honesty as if they were masks instead of virtues.
Taking examples does not mean that the comparison is soulful resonance or that you can extrapolate “THE TRUTH”…from the air.
The ALL begins with a chioce…
Don’t even try to tell people what you think I know, or AM.
Soulless politician.
You don’t bring me joy. Just go away. Please.;)
Is everything here about YOUR JOY? About making YOU feel joyful? In a nutshell… yes, really. It has become that way over the years.
Why say ‘don’t even try to tell people’? Everything I say is a lie, right? Who is going to believe a word I say? My intentions are dishonorable, yes? Who will pay attention to them? Huh?
I am sorry to have been cruel. It was necessary, to break through the wall you’ve built around yourself – to the true you. All of it, not just the glimpses you choose to show to others.
Relax. You are safe now.
What are your intentions?
Gatubela,
I have the highest respect for you. Your very first post on here about your Scorpio was humble, thoughtful and full of grace, because already you were in the state of becoming. And that’s how it went on from there with all your communications, so it’s hard to compare ‘the Eagle effect’ on us. There are times when fragments of your posts bring up feelings of annoyance in me, as I am sure – mine in you. But ultimately – your generosity of spirit is what allows me to be humble – with you. Thank you.
Intentions.
I have partially answered that in my last few posts.
My first posts were arrogant and full of assumptions, and got the bashings. Which at first I could not understand. I do now. And through the fights I came to realise the person I am fighting with…. is my mirror. Not intentionally/unintentionally mirroring me, no. He truly is, by virtue of both our intrinsic feminine/masculine natures. I needed to know the full extent of it. My inner self felt it HAD to know ALL. I do now. If not all – I understand a great deal of the man, and WHY the energies worked out between us the way they did. It was and is fascinating.
In the same way the Eagle wanted to draw out my true nature – I wanted to know his. That meant ‘hidden’. That, including personality expressions of his true deeper essence.. what forms those expressions took, and what triggered them in some cases and kept them dormant in others.. why he felt threatened at times, and generous at others… how he attempted to manipulate the audience, and in what cases it became so very urgent… when he felt very loving, and when there was a palpable rage underneath… both his Scorpio and his Eagle modes… how strong and real was his state of Being… above all… can he ultimately BE his truth, here and out of it… Perhaps, to most people here such things would not even occur. Well… that’s why I am who I am. Most of it is very hard to explain verbally, as the understandings happened on such a visceral level, as and when things progressed.
Was it a dishonourable intention? I don’t feel so. Was it a premeditated (consciously expressed within me) intention? Yes, in the last six months it was. Was it a selfish intention? I feel it was selfish, because the man didn’t ask to be ‘investigated’. But by the same token, when I made my first comment – I didn’t ask for spiritual teachings. Ultimately, we both chose to remain in each other’s corner, to learn who we are, so full responsibility to both.
My spiritual development got, unfortunately, intertwined with the presence of the man, since it is through him I came into it. I feel that I can let go now and separate the two. Through the truth of what I *me* perceived in fighting and interaction – that truth of WHO I am really talking to, beyond a presented figurehead on the Forum, beyond a carefully selected script.
I accept that I was not graceful, nor kind or loving to the Eagle throughout this. Whether he will forgive that – is irrelevant. Knowing, to me, was much more important than any superficial ‘acceptance’ by him. I’ve perceived the man in both form and soul. It’s enough.
Whether this resonates or not with people – is not my concern. I’ve sincerely expressed my perceptions and understandings, and that is my concern. That’s all I have to say on the subject, dear Gatubela. I don’t feel like ‘explaining’ any more of me.
I just had a very random unrelated thought… if we needed the money to breathe…. the world would be in a very bad shape. Humans would go extinct very fast.
What have you done with your intimate knowledge of this man you say you “love”? Because we are witnesses to a woman who feels that she has been rejected by a man.
You chose to break down walls with cruelty?
Why fight against your mirror? That is like fighting against yourself.
ohhhh right….leos don´t mind the mirror…
Dear Pluto,
when murron was captured by the English, she looked at them square in the eye…in that moment she was him, she was unbreakable… in her heart she knows the vulnerabilities of the warrior do not reside on his physical form or his spirit, they reside on the suffering of those he love and care…When truth and love are perceived, words are powerless, acts are powerless, cruelties are powerless.
Love, when it’s present. It brings out the best in us.
The love story I told here wasn’t finished yet, but it will take me some time to finish writing it. It’s a bright and sunny day outside, I plan to raise my head and let the sun and wind kiss my face, then have a good day. I wish the same for you, everyday.
Love,
jojo
She became ONE with the energy of death.
“Love, when it’s present. It brings out the best in us.”
It sure does JoJo. Thanks specifically to the people who are catalysts of it.
The truth of present love.
Thanks to the courage of discerning people who are nourished by it and in reverence of loving truth in the deepest of motivations from others. certain spirited hearts know because they have the power to– Perceive. See. Vision.
So knowing real love actually requires EYES (in the heart) to know the spirit expressed through us and among us. Love requires the death of logical, pin-headed perceptions for political points. Because logic and rules and subjective agreements between zombies is blissful through it’s own ignorance. And true ignorance… is the inability to see with the heart.
The truth, be it uncomfortably negative or radiantly positive… doesn’t even matter to the limitation of a personality prison because that lacking perception is thinking.. again, not seeing… through mans tiny posturing world. Not through Gods world.
What is man’s world?
Again to connect the dots for masculine women out there who are literally men in their literal thinking, or more truthfully, their neurotic sexual and emotional oppression… here….
…When Murron hit that drone of a human-animal in the face, she knew he was a coward. Plain and simple. Cowardice is Profound of the meaning it excavates while we witness it through human motivation. It’s Intention.
Cowardice…. connects…. the trillion dots of man’s mind. In every way you can imagine. Cowardice… the act of it… is Protected “by the Laws” of human minded sheep. Laws created by man and for man so he can exercise his mortality and leverage himself over others.
So Murron knew the ignoramuses watching her get assaulted were just a few more??….. Cowards.
Everything has meaning in this life and death… and that meaning also beautifully expresses the Truth of mortality as noticed in man’s blissful ignorance with the material logic and laws he devised (created).
Masculine, mental. and insufferably co-dependent Women… do what they do and think the way they think because???… of that cowardice among the known and blissfully conformed brains of man… believed to be true.
Man has simple made their lie the truth. By creating laws to hide behind.
We need laws to protect our society. But cowardice, ahhh yes cowardice is simply a profound injustice we do not govern.
So yes JoJo baby… you are wonderful to experience the reality and truth as it really does for others, like Murron who was divine in her purity and innocence, independent of man’s laws.
She was free before and after her mindless death. She is as free as you baby.
“Because we are witnesses to a woman who feels that she has been rejected by a man.”
Oh Gatubela…. but there was no rejection. And there is no rejection. Can you not see it? Just the feeling coming from my ‘ultimate knowledge’, as you say. So whatever you witness… is not from here.
And as I said… I was fully prepared to sacrifice my superficial ‘acquaintance’ with Mr Eagle for the true knowledge of him. Not a problem. I can love at a very respectable and a very silent distance.
Secondly, I feel that you are picking out phrases now merely for the ‘effect’ of it: break down walls with cruelty, fighting against the mirror like fighting against yourself, leos dont’ mind mirrors…. this is all plain… playful, but not serious. I am sorry.
Thirdly, “No explanations are required from my side..”
I am on MY side. You are on yours. Since you are universally loved and respected by all of us here… I am afraid it calls for some…hmmmm…. responsibility? Humility alert. But seriously, you cannot expect the same dynamics as you have to apply to every other woman. It is all different, every time. You’ve been here long enough to notice. No?
Why is it of such curiosity to you? You got very animated in the last few days.
Serious energies are to be revered and loved. Used only in surrender to the divine. Otherwise they can cause the illusions that you are now attempting to bring up with “knowledge”. In these kinds of energies, they actually mask your true intent.
Cats (as to the reason for that video) love themselves, and that is why we can show love, even under the mirror. It has nothing to do with sides. Just sharing. Loving ourselves just happens to be instinctual. I am trying to feel, what is instinctual for you.
I don´t know what kind of responsibility that you now feel I must shoulder, but I don´t take my orders from you. Very interesting your way of throwing that on me, while you are at free liberty to use your ultimate knowledge, sacrificing your “relationship” for it…like it was more important than the person himself.
LoL…you do act like a rejected woman, because all you got, was knowledge, and not love.
Gatubela, I am happy that you love yourself. Leos are naturally imbued with self love, and it’s a gift.
I know who I am. I know what is inside of me. I know I don’t want anything from you or anybody on here. Nothing can be based on blind lack of knowledge and understanding of another. I wanted the knowledge of the man who turned my world upside down. My interaction with him did not pan out in the same way as others. Nothing and nobody was sacrificed, because all there is – will remain within me. But there is a problem you see… when a man comes across as an immensely strong person – people take it as an absolute. While strong people, too, have tender moments. As I said I was selfish. I saw only the absolute. I see the other side too now. While it makes me feel guilty of carnage – it is what it is. Battles are fought for a reason. I had mine.
You failed to answer why such curiosity on your part. But I don’t want this conversation anymore. Please have kindness within to leave it alone and let the silence be.
Thank you.
Hi Ines,
Well, as you already know, kitty does as she feels. It won´t matter if you say “pretty please” either. LoL…
It was not curiosity, it was something more instinctual. Do I maintain silence and just “watch” while you throw your comments around? Not this kitty.
Your definition of the humility I am supposed to be having is a very interesting “imperative”…of course, those that give the orders and weigh other people down with all the responsibility, are never the ones who feel that by the very act of doing so, their own morality and incredible arrogance becomes highly questionable.
If I were to take “orders” from “someone”, it would not be “you”, it would be the Divine.
Ines,
…I was fully prepared to sacrifice my superficial ‘acquaintance’ with Mr Eagle for the true knowledge of him….
Sacrificing your superficial “acquaintance” in return of a true knowledge of an eagle… Trust me it won’t work… whatever is your intention towards gaining that knowledge.
In my experience in my relating with an eagle… I had to die many many times…. expecting nothing… even thinking that he is not going to be with me … naturally he always come back to me slowly sharing himself layer by layer because… he trust me…
Pluto Death/transformation… I know nothing about it until I’ve experienced it. Experience it… feel it…. live it… write it… share it because you feel loved and grateful for the knowledge you’ve learned from the experience. That to me is the simplicity of Knowledge.
What knowledge do you want to see when an eagle is already fearlessly sharing himself?!!!
…Why can we not relate to one another, Eagle? What is the stumbling block? Our personalities? …
Don’t waste your energy asking why this and that to an eagle. Ask the right questions to yourself and seek the answers internally. You don’t need ppuppy’s approval do you?
Mari
Thank you, Mari
When I said ‘It hasn’t panned out in the same way as for others’.. it really really hasn’t. I am still trying to fathom the uniqueness of this situation.
“Pluto Death/transformation… I know nothing about it until I’ve experienced it.”
That’s the thing…. you’ve had the real interaction with your Eagle, as did many others here. Raised eyebrows…. puffed up eyes…. phone conversations with gaps between the phrases… hint of a smile in a person’s face…. heavy silences… slight movement of a hand… maybe a happy embrace… and an awkward ‘Good bye’…. you actually LIVED IT. You lived the real EXPERIENCE AS IT OCCURED IN YOUR LIFE.
Women came in here already ‘burdened’ with whatever ‘Scorpio issues’ they had in their lives. I came in ‘Scorpio free’, I mean it in all honesty, because my real life ‘Scorpio’ experiences prior to that were not of ‘personal’ relating.. Please anyone, do not twist that phrase into something else, i.e ‘that’s because you cannot relate’, blah blah…. there simply wasn’t any romantic (personal) involvement, that’s all. I’ve found myself in a weird situation when I’ve run into both having all my previous beliefs smashed into smithereens, and having developed strong feelings for the man who did it. People place it ‘love’ in inverted commas here. No matter.
Sure, it happens. Anything happens online. I tried to feel something through a virtual environment, based on… bloody words. WORDS. In full view of others. Have you, or ANYBODY here, for that matter, ever had THAT level of surveillance of your relating with the Eagle in YOUR life? Anyone? And even when it wasn’t in full view… oh how much gets twisted, misinterpreted online, when the natures of two people are so similar… and their personalities are so well developed… when they both have a tongue to kill (yes, my Mercury is in the 8th, not the 7th… and the same degree Sun conjunct. Weird or what), when they are stubborn and sensitive and feeling in nature..
Sure, acceptance and opinions of others doesn’t matter. It’s me I listen to. Or her… she wants to lie down and die. Why… because she feels the love. Yours and others. And she cannot take anymore. Yet, because she has never really felt it in her life – she cannot give either… Once, there was a selfish, soulful act of kindness. From a man. ONCE. A long time ago. She never forgot that, and if she could give that person anything – she would. No, it wasn’t romantic. Just pure soul in someone.
She is not me, and I am not her. Yet, we are together in this nightmare. I don’t want this anymore.
“Your definition of the humility I am supposed to be having is a very interesting “imperative”…of course, those that give the orders and weigh other people down with all the responsibility, are never the ones who feel that by the very act of doing so, their own morality and incredible arrogance becomes highly questionable.
If I were to take “orders” from “someone”, it would not be “you”, it would be the Divine.”
For some reason, Gatubela, you got stuck on this and your own word ‘order’… I am not the one who came up with the word or perceived our conversation in that way.
What is my definition of humility?
You tell me to have humility and yet you can not define it yourself?
Define it yourself and look in the mirror while doing it.
“Define it yourself and look in the mirror while doing it.”
Well…….
“If I were to take “orders” from “someone”, it would not be “you”, it would be the Divine.”
Can you feel, Gatubela, how pointless this exchange is becoming? Can you see it sliding into the vortex of your Leonine pride and my Piscean ego? None of us are free from those, not even you. I am trying to find good intent in what you wrote in the last few posts… and it simply doesn’t feel genuine.
I am sorry, I don’t want it this way. I sincerely asked you to let me be, but you have to push on. So… do. Without me. There are very few women on here who have the courage to openly talk, regardless of how spiritually advanced they are or not, regardless of whether their opinions or beliefs resonate with others, regardless of whether they are soulful, or soulless.. I was one of those.
I will simply go into my ocean cave.
Thank you.
Yeah…I did feel that you would bring that up. Ego for me, has always been the way IN to the DIVINE, so I will always try to dive into it.
It would stay forever limited to my own leonine ego, if I were not willing to go there with you and face that mirror as well. Pointless is letting it be for me and not seeing it to the end. My choices are not always so egotistical but I sure as heck won´t dive in there all by my own!!! I don´t run away, I refuse to hide and I will go through the dirt as well.
I did look in the mirror…lol
And I found that humility is feeling something beyond me and feeling love for it. An energy came up and it resonated in me…through me…
It was the cosmos.
Well, the video is superficial in many ways, because it tries to convey it only through the physical form. No matter. I have to remind myself that, since my self love is not as stable and well developed.
….That’s the thing…. you’ve had the real interaction with your Eagle…
Yes Ines, real interaction and soul exploration in the Unknown. Physical hmmm no… not even a happy embrace…
See if you are just looking into bloody words and physical experience with the eagle then you are missing out. With eagle it is always the quality of your soul…
That just made me burst out crying… I must be really really fucking inept at self expression….. how is it when I say ‘real person’ is then interpreted into me looking for physical? How so? why if i say ‘words’ when it means words in talking to some it is taken as i read meaning in words and not what was perceive din meaning of those words… What is wrong with me and my way of sdaying things!!????????????????????????????????????????????
WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME why am I like some fucking village idiot that no one can ever understand, anything i meant to say is understoof differently anything that i perceive is someone lese’s joke,,, anything ….i give meaning to is meaningless, i don’t care anymore, i want to die, it is ridiculous and this life is just about people misunderstanding…………………. it has always been like that or i come form some other planet i don’t care, it’s over, its over its over. All is over why am i born that way why am i born at all I don’t want it
Yikesssss!!!!!
Don´t feel so bad…I am a cat and I often get misunderstood too! But I keep on going and I don´t give up.
I have been trying to understand pisces people…(more looking into that mirror with you) You do seem to have some very beautiful characteristics..
How come you don´t see those when you feel your own energies?
http://www.experienceproject.com/groups/Am-A-Pisces/3579
Hi Ines,
Here is some more for a bit of flavour…
Dear Bella,
You have once asked what it takes to feel the Cosmo; I’m witnessing it blossoming beautifully each waking moment in you with your unique individual soul. You are a beautiful kitty. May be someday you are too cute to resist I will just break in and kidnap the kitty.
Dear Pluto,
I felt your wish for me, that my reward is already given, that God will take care of me…the Joy with making choices out of love, like deceit, when that choice is made, it’s me it’s constantly nurturing, and when that love is given and perceived, how it brings joy beyond any man-made pain. Murron came to William twice after her senseless death, when she came to wake him up in the middle of the night for the French lady’s presence, in that she forgives his living; when she came to witness his death. While the “Nazi” in man via their cowardice and betrayal of William’s act of honor toward them, had their cold blooded hand upon his liver, his lungs and torn at it, to invoke his “reaction” to pain and other form of torture, while this torture is going on, she came to relieve him of his mortal pain…Her love for him is absolute, it holds no ownership over the man or his happiness, as “LOVE” is absolute, when that absolute love is perceived and returned, the bonding is REAL and indestructible, beyond laws of man and physics. People who are connect to the energy of love will throughout their life attempt to “love” others, and that love was never perceived, nor able to be returned. Until the moment of recognition came when that love is actually perceived and returned, then the real bonding begin… relating is the attempt, bonding is the chemistry, most people in their lives never made it to the first.
Yes, I have attempted to relate to others in my life too, when I told them that they have my permission to shot me because I’m stronger, they pull the trigger, when I told them I wish them to be happy with or without me, they don’t wish me the same… the cowardice of man’s mind…the scale was never balanced, sustainability was never achieved… So to imply that because he loves is“leverage” in any sense, as a ground of one’s own ambivalent intent, is the ignorance of the ignorant at their ignorant best. Via love and zero resistance to love and humanity I RECOGNIZED him. When that real bonding with the presence of absolute love present, trust is absolute, loyalty is absolute… in my oblivion I felt it in my instinct, without clarity, I told the men in my life that I have zero tolerance of betrayal, I either get even or walk away, mostly I walk way, and I mean what I say. In the past men are intimidated by this statement, I don’t know why I was also absolute in its belief. I ask them: why do you WANT to betray me in the first place? You are free, you can go anytime you do not want to stay. I understand now, to me, the nature of bonding is its eternal and absoluteness, by my nature this is what I believe in love, its forever, because each moment, where would the motivation to betray grew in the bonding of REAL? I know I want that happiness, anything less is not worth fighting for.
The sadness is so many people in their existence do not want that happiness, or they don’t “believe” in that happiness so they don’t have to fight for it or live in the pain of the consciousness that they don’t have it, yet. They are afraid to DREAM. In the life void of dream happiness means we all should equally suffer, the vicious acts to KILL JOY, snaffle dreams, enslave minds and heart and soul… destroy. The passive just quietly sucks the life out of you. Feel that energy, feel it when you walk around the VOID and its sucking that weakens you when you live near by it. So when Martin Luther King started “I have a dream…” he wanted to INSPIRE the suffering to DREAM themselves, dream of what? Money? Successes? Enslavement of others? Power? No, DREAM of freedom of self and others, love, liberty… These things, these thing bring you real happiness, it’s the gift of the Cosmo, not the gift of man. So you may feel the joy of Cosmo eternity, rather than the high of the quick fix of man, the later never truly satisfy, you will always feel dissatisfied when that fix faded and hungry for more.
I want the people’s life I walked into to WANT to be HAPPY, to be inspired by the happiness they witness in me, and have the self honesty to admit what they ask for: “responsibility” “entirety of family” is not what they TRULY wanted, it is NOT satisfying. Even if they have what they “hope” for, it is not what they are witnessing here on this forum between two loving souls, even on the intangible wavelength of the internet and under the bright sunlight of transparency; it will be more than they had in any of the tangibles of their life, may be then, they would have the courage to ask for the same happiness for themselves. And begin to LIVE via death, rather than be DEAD in their living, and may be then, begin to connect to the energy of LOVE, and receive the gifts of the Cosmo meant for EVERYONE.
Like William, like anyone with heart of love, these acts of honor may or may not be answered, on the battle ground where the scott prince awaited to be crowned the slave, the outcome was unknown to William. The outcome of our choice is always unknown to us as they should be… we just have to make them loyal to our heart of the moment and that choice is eternal.
Murron in her life and death, felt every moment of William’s love, or his pain, and responded with what’s inside of her of that same moment. And that’s eternity.
Love,
jojo
and to the ones on death bed and holding on to the last breath, the butcher held that last breath for many years and probably hadn’t yet let it go. and some most gruesome suffering is when one is unable to die until the day they are truly dead. Why do they have a huge market for drugs for people tried to subside that pain anyway they can?
Let it go, death IS painful, how can it be otherwise? During my own I have lost sleep, lost vision and balance, lost hair, grew hives all over for no reason and the DR told me I developed autoimmune disease which you probably already read about on my personal blog, constantly having suicidal though, the whole experience that last for years feels like I don’t want to live in my own body anymore. But the life and joy after the pain… it’s worth it all.
“kidnap the kitty”…
ummmm…lol…that´s the second time you have said the word “kidnap”.
ahahah I am guilty of kidnapping the kitty!
I am taken by your growth and grounded comprehension JoJo. You have literally transformed before our eyes over the last 4 years.
I am honored to share in your divine feeling states, in your perceptual immortality… and that you will function with this transformed energy within your heart & soul during the daily grind of mortal living and mundane attachment to form. Blend them as One sweetheart. And know that they are one. Form and Spirit. Oneness.
I am so proud of your growth it humbles me.
Words…words are the killers of everything that is beautiful between people… they are said mindlessly… people do not think very carefully what it is they are trying to convey.. they jump in with their fucking stream of thoughts, in a hurry to overtalk each other, fuelled by a need to RELIEVE their immediate psycho states, to vomit out their ‘ideas’, ‘concepts’ believes’ in the hope that the other party will FUCKING ACCEPT… Oh what a joy of acceptance by another human being… what a tearful confirmation of one’s worth… he/she UNDERSTANDS me!!!! He/she is ON THE SAME WAVELENGTH!!! How beautiful….. and that feeling of constant discontent temporarily is replaced by a feeling of ‘belonging’, hahaha…. because it haunts them day and night…. it is vague, like a whisper, always there, always looking to be killed, but nothing does, a temporary relief from own fucking torment… until one day something awful happens, and the discontent turns into a full blown depression, or suicidal thoughts, or anger of such scale that others get hurt, physically and psychologically, the discontent of the walking dead….
and no one EVER BOTHERS to carefully tailor those words to the meaning of those thoughts…. if they did – what REAL horrors would come up? And even the ones aware – have no respect for the POWER OF LANGUAGE. It is used and abused in countless ways across the world, deliberately spinned, twisted, shaped, or unconsciously applied to cover up real intent…. Something from my personal history now comes up to confirm the importance of EVERY FUCKING WORD we say, even if only in mundane situations…. I once translated a letter from a British Ambassador to the President. Long time ago… it was checked by a Brit with a great knowledge of the language. I was good. It came back with ONE correction. That one word he changed – changed the whole meaning of the phrase and the subsequent tone…. I noted that. I understood….
AND people READ back OTHERS in the same way…….. they read some shite into others’ expression , without actually making a thorough and careful effort to really understand it first…..I’ve always tried to the best of my understanding to be precise in what I SAY and never ever got that same level of verbal involvement back… yet, like others – I have not always tried to be precise in my UNDERSTANDING of what others say. Too right, wake up, Ness, you only ever diligently did half the job correctly yourself, didn’t you? Why fucking complain now?
But really… why even TRY to understand when you know that what’s behind those expressions in the real world – is shite???? what does one do? Give up on words…give up on people’s verbal responses… they never mean what they say, not really, they have no ability to… and beyond that – they have no real desire to…. no fucking desire…. what is beyond those empty words….. did they mean to hurt you, encourage you, strike you, slight you, embrace you… people are pitifully bad with the art of expression, they are apes still coming to terms with acquiring one of the biggest gifts evolution gave them – ability to communicate.. they don’t know HOW to apply that gift to aid their own miserable lives… , it is not your fault, if you have some high standard in that – do not fucking expect it from others. DO NOT expect. They are not you, you are not them. Your naivety is believing that people see and perceive things the way you do. … And the way you do perceive things – is complicated, with a thousand meanings attached to each event, and the ripples each waking other meanings and associations in your fucking complicated head, so that the picture is always full burst of stuff and is never close to the real thing as a result. Hence.. trust your innermost intuition, not the fucking ridiculous words people immerse themselves in. Look in the mirror – this is the person who has your best interests at heart… talk to her as you know how, she will never lie…
I want to be a flower…. no words, gently swaying in the wind, silently gracing the world with my beauty and not expecting anyone to appreciate this beauty, not even my own petals…. not knowing that someone will come and pick me up and that will be the end of life, do flowers hurt when picked up? but that’s OK… the world has already received a potion of my flower grace, and even in death I would continue to bless someone’s world for a while… until it is no more. and I didn’t have to say a word…. leave alone trying to explain how beautiful I am.. Face it, woman, that’s what you have been doing all this time: explaining how beautiful you are. No fucking need. Just be beautiful, it will suffice.
Words are poisonous and alien to you. You always knew it, from the beginning of being here, so why stay where you cannot breathe, where the mode of communication is so far from who you are it feels like walking in setting cement. Forgive yourself for now, it has been long ten months of words… you are literally a fish out of the water,,, that’s why diaries never worked for you, blogging will never be your choice… all that there is inside – is powerless to be expressed. Accept that and carry it within silently. You are silent mostly in life, not because there is nothing to say, but because you choose to be on your own a lot. Choose own company over that of others because that constant chatter does your head in… remember you started crying in a bar when meeting with ex work colleagues because you couldn’t PHYSICALLY stand being there, in that horrible zoo of human life… THE OFFENSIVENESS of observed interaction between others in that horrible zoo of a human life… your beautiful friend understood, and we sat by the bus stop and had a sip of Bacardi and coke, and walked to the night club (your third only in a lifetime), and you danced like mad, with your eyes closed, and that was a relief – to express without words, without chatter, just the body… and remember the retreat when no one talked, and how fucking beautiful it felt to be in the silent company of humans… what a relief and what a nightmare when it was over, and everyone started to talk again… and you sat in another room, you and a Capricorn girl, silently, while others chatted away next door… your skin crawled and you wanted to put fingers in your ears…
yet here was no choice, and you did, and you tried, and good on you for trying, and learned that words… are trolls.
Bella,
Haha, I love kitty who makes me laugh, when I don’t even want to smile. Kidnap is the code word for sweep one’s little paws off with amazing friendship, with some spice on it. lol.
Pluto,
You make me smile when all that’s left is to smile, no matter how the mundane world feels like otherwise. thank you for your compliment…it humbles me too.
http://freedom1xpress.wordpress.com/2012/09/05/the-journey/
Love,
jojo
Death is painful, watch a fish out of water, it’s never out of water if it swims, it’s out of the of the water when it gulps and twists with bulging eyes and gaping mouth. It felt terrible, I called the person who got me there the butcher to this day, but in the end, it’s really not a bad thing if you let death claim you.
To change the tempo a bit…
This guy is an Aquarian. I’ve been listening to him for a few months now. I have a lot of respect for the truth he compels through his stark humanitarian message. I can tell he has personally experienced suffering and hardship. I lived in L.A, so I’m aware of the street mentality… or lowly underworld desire to survive, segregate and instill fear and hate in the community at any personal cost.
My read on this specific artist as a soul… is that he is very advanced in seeing the truth in human nature, it’s rawest drives, and what life and death has meant to him. While in L.A I made a friends with a few Aquarian men and women who were all incredibly socially perceptive. Their minds are very unique and individualized which I also respect.
Yet in my Scorpio probing with them on more intimate, personal (as opposed to collective) levels… I found each one was quite blind of themselves. Detached from showing any emotion. It is no coincidence that “brotherhood” and “friendship” are cornerstones of the Aquarian psyche. I really love their detachment among people and zany perspectives. That’s a virtue I value and have adopted in my social evolution.
The contrast to “Dance with the Devil”….which is actually the underlying tune that your artist included in his song.
I once sang this song when I was a teenager and received a standing ovation.
Love those energies….
Very feminine Gatubela… full of soul.
That was a grave reminder of the dark in man.
I suppose the real light and love we’ve shared here is shocking in comparison to what is expressed through this artists ego. Remembering that ego entities crave approval (feedback) from an audience ‘Outside’ of themselves. Not approval deeply accepted within themselves.
I would not know if this guy has courageously surrendered his ego persona via death of ego, or if he is a truly compassionate, dignified, moral person with women in general. I would only know his true character, away from the bright lights of publicity and media approval, by talking to him directly.
For some reason I felt the song intensely… the dark side of life and it’s reality.
…So when the devil wants to dance with you, you better say never
Because the dance with the devil might last you forever…
I feel that every moment of our lives is a deciding moment. We are always given a choice…. it is very easy to fall and succumb to devils temptation. It satisfies you for awhile but then the consequences hunts you forever like devil’s own prisoner. You just notice how history repeats over and over in your life you end up realizing you are on the same crossroad again. So when you are in that crossroad for once make a mature choice and break the pattern…there are moments that you have to be brave and take the road less taken to transform and start your life…
I don’t know which form ‘death’ takes for people… I don’t have sleepless nights, and my tears are only occasional, apart from the day when I made a decision to stop… it simply feels… clear. Not all the time… Clarity is a rarity in a Piscean world. It may last for a second or two, like suddenly stepping out into a new setting from the lift in Inception, a wall paper tear suddenly ripping and revealing another picture underneath… bright and lucid, but so very quick, before I know it – everything shuts down, and I am desperately trying to hold on to what has been revealed, like waking up from a dream and trying to remember, and it slips through and falls into fragments, and each fragment in turn disintegrates right in front of my mind… I know then I saw the true picture, not my skewed perception…. it is a nightmare, really, no one can ever comprehend that nightmare of Piscean perceptual experiences.
What we see is not what the rest of the world sees… One may say it’s the same for everyone… yes, to a point… but how many times have I made a comment in a group, and people I know would all say ‘Gees, we didn’t see it like that’…. Or ‘You really have an interesting way of seeing things’…. So I fucking do.
that selfish ‘me’, ‘me’ platform… One scary thought in that it makes me cringe and look back at my relationships with people in general… was there a time in all of this when I thought ‘Hang on a minute, what kind of effect is that having on another?’ ONCE… and that was love then. That was my breakthrough the first time. The rest of the time I was so self obsessed that it didn’t even OCCUR to me to ask the question. The illusion of dealing with the invincible superman, and maybe there was no effect whatsoever, this is not the point. I DIDN’T ASK MYSELF THAT QUESTION. oh I know self too well.. when she is in ‘top’ form, driven by desires – take cover, people. That ultimate self perpetuating machine that demolishes everything in her path in rage of passion, whatever that passion is… including the object of her desire sometimes. So my devils are different to those of others in many ways…
True Love
I don’t know about the language of energies, but I was taken to my breakthrough from obsession… if I wasn’t obsessed enough to stay – nothing would have happened… ENOURMOUS feeling of compassion for the man because of what I realised I had been doing. That was the one time of feeling true Love. That was the time when I saw the face, when I felt the Presence of the Source, when things felt like entering a New World… And it was gone. Obsession carried on, understandings rolled in, Love – was gone.. oh the frustration of it, the agony of knowing I was IN, and now I was, by some strange force, thrown out, and the door was shut in my face… I couldn’t FEEL IT….that… that absolutely clear, gentle, bell like sound resonating through the air, the feeling of the whole body being open and free…. an utter and total acceptance of what was in front of me… an unconditional feeling of Being…. gone.
So obsession carried on and over, I wanted that love feeling back so badly, because the FREEDOM of it was so absolute and beautiful… it makes me cry just remembering it…. I was free from obsession in that time, and of wanting anything, and of my all consuming desires…. but more fights, my ego kicked in, all got buried under. I couldn’t sustain it… Yes, I did say at the time, half consciously, but ominously, could I even sustain it? I couldn’t. I never felt anything like it before….
I have been in dangerous, life threatening situations before, including once being told in the dark of the night and in the middle of nowhere ‘This is where I am going to bury you’….. I never let go of ‘me’ then. ‘Me’ didn’t really exist then, there was nothing to let go of, I really WAS that flower… The way to Love for me is not through guns, or immense material suffering, or artificially altered mind states, whether through drugs or a very intense experience… The ONLY way to Love for me is through loving another. Through the suffering of loving another I will give up on that selfish gene, through loving another I will learn to really love myself… I just know who I am too well…
… Love energy is not a mental state and can never BE a result of a mental state, it cannot be willed into, it cannot be thought into… It IS, in each one of us, sleeping and it may never be awaken in some people… I know what it is now. When people here made fun of it placing it into commas, sneering – doesn’t matter one bit. I don’t feel it right now, but I know exactly what I felt. That’s why what transpired here for me was so different to others’ experiences. It came truly through loving of the man.
I don’t know how to get back there. My intuition is failing me so badly at the moment, it just makes me cry… everything shut down, I feel dead inside. When it was spoken about crystallised fears… fears are just lifetime habits INGRAINED into a person’s psyche… those synapses in the brain well connected by now, and what kind of sharp knife do I need to sever them??????.. THIS is the prison. Our own minds. THIS is painful. But here is the most painful pain I’ve discovered… when one CANNOT DIE, anyone here who has EVER felt that!!???
I have questions which I cannot ask. Because people will not UNDERSTAND my questions, that communication problem I spoke about earlier, because of the perceptual differences, because talking about intangible things is really impossible, to convey phenomenal experiences, even talking about them in terms of energies is confusing at times…. I just feel whatever comes my way, I gave up on trying to describe the feelings and perceptions… Funnily, I know that the Eagle is the one who is closest to understanding the torment of another watery creature…
I will grapple with stuff on my own.
We fought… over NOTHING. ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. All that I know now – NOTHING separates us. This is such a joke. I feel the tears in my eyes, but they are not coming. I am dead.
Since the dawn of time, all women at some stage in their lives have lived in utter fear to maintain their sacred sexuality and beautiful essence in the midst of man’s corrupted darkness, destructive powerlessness and his self-loathing through self-importance. That is what really saddens me, Mari.
Reality… the true life of human beings out there in the real world is undeniably dysfunctional and afraid of death, while sedated on it’s addictions, it’s attachments, lost in their escapism, and abusive towards each other in homes, groups and communities all around the world.
The compulsive, subconscious sexual hunger of man, his seeds of corrupt thought and behavior and the spawn of fear in man, conceives profound despair through the divinity of women. The truth of what I sense in the real world is just horrific to me at times. The ignorance and cruelty that men are capable of, is just unspeakable.
I feel such a deep reverence for the God-like love, transcendent through ALL women and females of all ages in general. I look into women’s faces all day, every day… and all I see is their innocence. I can’t psychically sense a Hitler in any woman I encounter. The darker, troubled, despotic women out there who I’ve known are only that way because of the men she has allowed into her life, or had in her life without a choice from childhood. She is always and forever the receptor of mans seeds.
Women are truly helpless in ravaged socioeconomic environments… they’re not even immune from man’s demonic, insidious greed in wealthier communities either. Corruption is faceless, baseless and classless. Men so desperately try so hard to BELONG somewhere and feel significant in some type of group, clan, organization or family, that too amazes me.
The collective myth is so powerfully planted into man’s personality, peer status, group status, it demands you live up to the pop culture and mythos celebrated of man’s successes. This myth is relentlessly drilled into the mass consciousness. A drilling which becomes ‘real’ to masses of impressionable minds on the material, literal level… and they are blissfully unaware of it.
To Mari, Gatubela, JoJo and others, I want you to see that my inner worlds are not strictly love and light from the sky. To know the sky, an eagle must know the sewer. The underworld of man.
Dear Mari, Bella,
Thank you Mari, and Bella, for your care and love. Yes, we should never temp with the devil. Drugs, violence, alcoholism, womanizing, rape, crime, manipulation, greed, deceits… these are things and environment of things…I will never consciously chose to let in my life in any shape and form. It is a clear and permanent choice if I have a choice in this matter. I am a mother, I must act to protect my son when he can’t make these choice for himself yet. I used to say to people: in life there are things we might not have much of a choice in, like parents, like coworkers… but we do have a choice in love and friendship, if we don’t use that choice, what do we have?
In reality of the world, in fear and blindness…intimacy between man and woman is the relationship between master and slave. That’s how sexual power I see play out almost everywhere. And being a creature of instinct and power, who do you think the Scorpio men take the position of? Yes, they must be the masters; it’s not an option to their psychic. That is when the “game” of relationship has the mortal hold on one’s vision and emotion and mind. And when a woman without clarity and personal freedom enters these games, she plays these games without consciousness and the eagle who has no intention to “play” must again, take control of the mastership in order to steer the relationship itself. Therefore entrapped in the game of insecurities and fear. No one get out the game when Both parties have not yet mastered that personal freedom. No one get out the game when we don’t first and for most FREE each other.
No one WANTS to be a master or a slave; it is NOT satisfying in any and either way. Enslavement is not connected to the Cosmo. People want control of the relationship in search of happiness but will never find it in that dynamic. How boring and monotone is a mastership? Feel that dissatisfaction and loneliness. So before meaningfulness can happen, a woman must be immune to enslavement, and she must enter it without any desire to master the man, with the pure intent to love. It takes incredible self-knowledge to get there. The Scorpio men, throughout of their lives have been practicing immunity to enslavement due to their emotional nature, so to give up the instinct of mastership is the surrender. And this is only the intent of the relating, then there are the levels of ability to understand, relate, bond…truth, trust, honesty, honor, dignity, freedom, forgiveness, willingness, and courage… it’s not a walk in the park or simply blind desire. It’s incredibly hard work of the soul and mind and heart, and commitment.
On top of all that, there is also the language of souls, we spoke different language with our being, intelligence can be entrapment of the fear of mind, but it also can be the enlightenment of our strength, the perceptual intelligence, the emotional intelligence, the intelligence of self-love… when we learn to read each-other’s language of being, we begin to understand to say “you connected to me emotionally before, how cruel of you to disconnect now” is in essence the same to say “you spoke to me before, how cruel of you to stop speaking to me now.” to different souls who spoke different languages. Intent, we must perceive the intent and read eachothers language to avoid the meaningless pain, meaningless pain are miscommunication and misinterpretation with no reward at the end…Because the Cosmo has given each and everyone of us a heart with all the capacity we’ll ever need to LOVE no matter how we express it, without exception.
Dear Pluto,
I heard it… I want to answer it… but I need to answer it honorably, not really to ask for anyone’s permission, but when I was in that “darkness, secrecy, avoidance” once before, these darkness ate at my soul and the souls of others, and I’ve vowed never to enter it again. It held no dignity and respect for anyone involved. So I will speak with Apollo about it first…and I don’t know what will happen when I do, but, the road less traveled, so it will be done.
… may I ask you something? but before I ask you my question, I must tell you half of a story I read somewhere first. There was once a young man, he had a powerful father, who mostly ignored him throughout his life due to his quest for more power. The young man act out his pain and defiance in being a trouble maker with his gang of friends. One day, the son got a new motorcycle; he and his friends took it out on the field to test drive it, vandalizing whatever was on their path. The flower field belonged to a flower farmer who had only one daughter and lived on that minor income. The farmer tried to stop him by standing in his path, and the young man thought he would duck in fear if he got close enough, but he didn’t, and accident broke out, he killed the farmer via shear ignorance and lack of humility. The powerful father used his influence to get the young man out of trouble by paying his best friend who was also there that day to take the blame and that best friend went to jail for manslaughter. The young man hated his father for incriminating his best friend and hated himself for letting it happen although his best friend want to take the blame and needed the help the father can provide for his frail mother. Nothing truly touched the young man’s heart, until his father took him to the hospital to see the dead farmer to install some humility into him, it didn’t really penetrate that hast of hatred he held towards his father, until, he saw the famer’s daughter, it was her eyes, eyes that look like someone took everything out of her, stared back at him, through him, not seeing him, it was just… a void… He then understood what he has truly done, he has destroyed not only the life of the dried up and hopeless farmer, but also the life of his young and unlived daughter…
He reformed himself and left his father, and grew up became an artist who makes ancient swords. He never forgot the eyes of the daughter. The father anonymously aided her upbringing. One day that pair of eyes walked into his studio… she was a reporter send to interview him about his coming exhibition. He couldn’t help himself but penetrate her life to be part of it, helping her, observing her, watching her, and eventually, fall in love with her. He told himself that he will do everything to make her happy, not only he loves her, he owes her. The girl been kind of heart, after they got married, tried to mend his relationship with his father, he had all but severed all relationship with him, the father although neglected him in his youth, truly love him, so when the girl gave him a chance in their life, he jumped on it, tried very hard to be part of it again. The young man, seeing his father talking to his wife, become deathly afraid, his father knew who she is, he was so afraid that he would tell her, that she would find out, he was so afraid to hurt her, to lose her, he became unreasonable, insecure, angry… he became the pain to her that he so tried not to be… eventually he couldn’t get out of his self-prison of torment, and decided to leave her, he sees himself as her source of pain, so he will get rid of it to make her happy. They parted. The young man was lost and in pain, years past, he never forgot her. And one day she walked into his life again by mere chance, he can’t help himself but want to be in her life again, she still loves him too… but he knew of his past mistakes. So he went to talk to his best friend who went to jail for him, they remained best friends all their life, he told his friend that he was going to confess everything to her, and ask her for her forgiveness, and start anew.
My question is, what would you have done if you were that young man? Will you go to her and confess of all his past mistakes? She loves him dearly, it’s clear she would of forgiven him. The other half of the story was what happened in the story after. It was a story that made me ask myself a lot of questions about love.
Love,
Jojo
Death feels like wrongness, it feels like when you open your mouth, no words can form because the center where emotions, words, logic, concepts were created were gone, so it eventually render you silent. Death is silent. The wrongness radiates to you current, past choices and beliefs and decisions… for the next months sometimes years, you are a gaping open wound, it would be your most vulnerable moments because all your darkness would come out, addictions, indifference… and via that open wound you will encounter your darkness and experiences meant to teach you to face and concur them, some of the most important self-knowledge are gained in that vulnerability. I don’t know what to do if you are unable to die. I have no answers.
But I have answer to this, why do you question your reality and experience? If a man’s intent is not to toy with you for six month, which makes no sense at all, then you have his presence for that entirety, the magic you felt is REAL when it was REAL to you. No one can change that, even he cannot change your experience. If you believe that, why do you need to confirm it with me? What is your motivation to wanting that confirmation coming from what is happening now? here? What is your intent towards me? What is my intent toward you? You feel hurt, but is spreading that hurt your intent? Ask yourself this question. And he does care about you, I know because he is me in many sense, the unity of Cosmo. Six month is a long time, a lot has exchanged, how can anyone hate, or truly be indifferent to a life he had no intention to harm, and had the experience to know for that long, he did not shut you out, he cannot speak because your mis-interpretation of his every word, so speaking to you is not an act toward your own interest. Sometimes when you are so desperate to hear what is no longer there your sense will conjure up illusions that are harmful to your own being. That care can only be in the form of silence, until you are able to HEAR again in clarity and independence and acceptance. And he is stepping up towards his intentions towards me, so that silence is an act of honor. He has no intention to be more cruel to you if he doesn’t truly feel compelled to by ambivalent acts. Why do you have to attach your experience to mine? They are separated and independent of each other, he has not played you while playing me, so all is a clear choice. Haven’t you ever made choice where you moved on and some man didn’t ? what did you say to them? Did you feel remorse as he is feeling now? of the pain he caused you? He made that choice so the remorse is unavoidable because your pain is unavoidable. If you truly had loved him, then move on, love yourself, become better. That’s all he really wishes for you.
I speak to you, not because I want any understanding from you, but because he can’t, so I choose to be his voice. I want to honor him as he has honored me. Because if he was forced by his intention towards me to make a stand, he will answer it and it will eat at his soul because he must chose to hurt someone when his intention is to heal. Via your ambivalent need to bring your experience to me, he will be forced to act in his honor but these acts will continues to eat at a soul that wishes to love, through witnessing your pain it will eat at his soul… You hare right, he does not wish to harm you, not ever. so please, take your experience with him with you, I honor and respect that to the full extent you wishes me to honor and respect that, and do what you wish and have a care for others.
Thank you.
Before I go… there is something I HAVE to question, because if I don’t – it will eat at me for the rest of my life…
This is how one begins to question if they are, in fact, normal, in some way, or are descending into madness…… when they fail to comprehend another human being… me, a naive and earnest in my dealings with people woman (as told by many) … What is below may be taken as a deliberate affront, but it is nothing of the kind. I am so baffled that I am beginning to doubt my own sanity…. here it is…
What JoJo wrote in that post “Why do you have to attach your experience to mine? They are separated and independent of each other, he has not played you while playing me, so all is a clear choice.” Or “What is your motivation to wanting that confirmation coming from what is happening now?” or “ Via your ambivalent need to bring your experience to me, he will be forced to act in his honor”…. Or “And he is stepping up towards his intentions towards me… Or “If you believe that, why do you need to confirm it with me?” ..
I didn’t get those. At all. Some I didn’t understand in terms of their meaning, such as ‘he hasn’t played you’… others I didn’t understand why they were expressed to me. lt draws a blank.. I didn’t understand what it all had to do with me…. why I was suddenly ‘attached’ to JoJo when I didn’t even think of her when writing my stuff… WHY DOES SHE BRING THIS TO ME? We don’t even talk, and our stories do not intersect, why is this happening? I appreciated the part about death and what it does, because… this is what it does. I even felt the Eagle part, although there was no need to tell me what I knew… But the rest… I didn’t respond at first because I was at a loss… I read and re-read trying to understand what she meant, and why she said what she said,, maybe there was a meaning hidden somewhere…. but it was blank. But it keeps bugging me.
So I listened to myself… the nasty, sick feeling came up which told me that there may be a touch of madness somewhere there on JoJO’s part… then I asked ‘but the Eagle didn’t see it that way…’ then I felt again… and it said the Eagle bases his relating on a completely different set of principles…. to him it doesn’t matter if a person is mad or not, as long as they are loving and pure of heart… what is madness anyway… all that happens – happens between two people, and if both of them believe or feel ‘normal’ towards each other – they ARE normal. The people who haunt this Forum are somewhat strange anyway, including myself.
… then I felt myself again… the thought comes… may be this was not addressed to me at all, since there was no name…. But I read it… it IS surely to me… so that is not it.
….so then I thought ‘Maybe I am just so irrevocably dumb, and there is some ultimate form of transcended language that it is beyond my understanding….’ Then again, I felt that JoJo’s expressions IN THE PAST, before she arrived at her transformation – were crazy, I am not talking about her very emotional outbursts – that is absolutely normal. Just some things that took place which, again, I couldn’t understand, such as her response once to Phoenix, a long time ago. The reason why I am saying this is because it shocked me so much that it got stuck in my head ever since. I simply couldn’t get the craziness and total randomness of that response. Or that outburst in post 1643, the Eagle responded, so obviously he understood, while for me it was absolutely coming from nowhere. Not connected to anything he wrote or said or meant.
Here I am… I appreciate that this may sound insulting. I expect some form of slashing, but that’s OK. It is my honest and a very confused take.
JoJO, do not take it personally, as much as it may feel like there is some agenda. There is absolutely none. Your writings and story resonated with me a great deal, and I commend you for having gone through hell and emerged on the other side of it… But you sometimes do things which are… weird, and when they are addressed to me somehow… I am trying to understand. So… take it at face value.
The whole thing, and everything now feels like I may be going nuts. Coupled with no emotions… this is total VOID.
Thank you.
“So I listened to myself… the nasty, sick feeling came up which told me that there may be a touch of madness somewhere there on JoJO’s part… then I asked ‘but the Eagle didn’t see it that way…’ then I felt again… and it said the Eagle bases his relating on a completely different set of principles…. to him it doesn’t matter if a person is mad or not, as long as they are loving and pure of heart… what is madness anyway… all that happens – happens between two people, and if both of them believe or feel ‘normal’ towards each other – they ARE normal..”
Yes…. Finally;)
Fuck it, JoJo, it still bugs me..
As I have been reading it again, many times…. the possible (possible) truth of that expression is so… UNBELIEVABLE in my world, in my reality that I am even afraid to spell it out… for I may be completely off my head!!! Because if your expression is about what I feel it MAY be about…. my reality is SO FAR REMOVED from that… it gives me chills, because I realise then that I live in the world of Unicorns, truly, a naive and very child like perception of what takes place between people, and that hidden darkness covertly creeping in… and what does not even occur to me.
I need some serious lessons in how to walk around people’s heads DISCERNINGLY. My open arms dropped.
“Sometimes when you are so desperate to hear what is no longer there your sense will conjure up illusions that are harmful to your own being. That care can only be in the form of silence, until you are able to HEAR again in clarity and independence and acceptance…”
You’ve grasped it sweetheart. You have honored my clear individuation as a man. Thank you. That’s all I have been really asking for, in my mood swings.
..”Death is silent…”
Absolutely baby. The power and layers of depth perception in that truth is unimaginable to mortal intellects. As the intellect is too comfortable to “know” death. Understanding that destroys walls of imagined fears and slights and creates a soulful re-birth of intimate chemistry. It is the male who is the penetrates his seed. If only he knew the occult power to love in silence.
“And he is stepping up towards his intentions towards me, so that silence is an act of honor…”
You’re now in tune with the Source or Eagle universe. You have acknowledged the bravery it had taken from me to “hurt you” in the past. You now see my intent as pure love for the present, and not to veil any insecurities. You now understand evolved love is turbulent and it is a power way beyond you (your personality hungers to maintain your model of the reality.
If a true eagle is not transforming a woman’s heart and psyche through the sheer power of his love… then…. he is not an eagle.
He is an indifferent duck, quacking in his self-pity and self-delusion that his woman “doesn’t understand” him.
Thus the proceeding subjective Scorpion assault to re-gain ego dominance. If Scorpios could only see their own ego during war… they might learn something about themselves.
Love
Pluto
To answer your question from this below JoJo…
“The young man, seeing his father talking to his wife, become deathly afraid, his father knew who she is, he was so afraid that he would tell her, that she would find out, he was so afraid to hurt her, to lose her, he became unreasonable, insecure, angry… he became the pain to her that he so tried not to be… eventually he couldn’t get out of his self-prison of torment, and decided to leave her, he sees himself as her source of pain, so he will get rid of it to make her happy. They parted. The young man was lost and in pain, years past, he never forgot her…”
So would I “be afraid” of my father or hurting her feelings or caring what my father “thought” of me?? As a man in my twenties, that’s all I did think about – to please others, to sacrifice my own needs and serve people who were loveless in return. Caring what everyone thought of me was the first illusion I had discovered. I was not a trace of the man then as I am today 15 years later.
I am obviously not afraid to hurt a woman’s feelings. Everyone reading this forum has experienced that truth. In my current evolution, I know myself deeply and where the dynamic is going when I express, and the damage it will naturally create in the bonding IF I DO NOT lead the direction of love through the bonding. I cannot expect a woman to lead the bonding. Because all women have a ton of insecurities they don’t know how to deal with. So my self-knowledge is everything when conflict calls in the name of love.
I am a soul who did not have a father JoJo… or a present (physically and psychically) nurturing mother.
That’s what the powers on high had planned for me. My life’s adventures and tremendous pitfalls, the rejections I have lived through, have shaped the guy you are typing to on a computer screen now.. hahaha.
I have grown from within like an old oak tree. I’m now free in the comfort of transcending all fears in my experience. Nothing is too daunting for the Warrior. The fear to die does not control my life choices like it had done for years. I am the will to die and the virtue to be re-born. To choose love over indifference. To shatter the concept of my unconscious, extremely narrow, shallow past personality-self.
My thirst for knowledge has sped-up my soul growth, in examining my extreme life experiences and in finding occult meaning through thousands of my personal conflicts and outcomes.
When, or if, we find the cause and origin of our life’s meaninglessness, we are free to change our history.
I have a hunger for the immaculate truth sweetheart. The rest is gravy;)
The cuteness of this equals a befuddled woman trying to love and eagle.
Death No.3, hahaha, my Virgo has to give it a number… shite…
I cry and smile here right now with relief…. I asked for silence. I am happy, if only at this moment in time… for this was my INTUITIVE, INSTINCTUAL understanding of what was needed and called for, and why. I understood it at a very deep and incomprehensible level…..
As I continue to feel nothing, absolutely nothing inside…. I know that one thing is still with me… what I was afraid of having lost – the Intuition, my unspoken understanding… ah crap, who cares if I cannot be artistic at giving this a tangible verbal form… I can INTUIT. The inner ‘voice’ may be quiet sometimes, screened by all the mind chatter… it is STILL THERE. I will listen to it ever so carefully. It is not really a ‘voice’, although we call it so… it is…. the state of knowing. Without words. Without being able to explain where this knowledge comes from. Often without physical manifestation. It is purely…. the State, I don’t know how to describe it, there is no way to… Just the FEEL. Thanks God, it hasn’t left me…..
I cannot engage with anyone anymore. There is no body/mind to talk. I don’t have ‘me’. I have a corpse which hasn’t even begun to decay. I am scared that it will stay that way from now on, forever…. I am scared that I will have no strength to rebuild… will there be anything to rebuild from? that there will be days when I will not want to live, and there will be days when I will want to kill, ah, that placid me in the last few months turned into a storm, the receptor of anger and rage has become anger and rage, has never been that… or has never expressed it? I hopelessly watched as the vessel was filled simultaneously with love and hate, what a fucking shocking separation…. I am scared that my emotional animal side will take over and entrap me in that state of no control… I am scared that I will not love again IN THAT WAY… I have to take each moment, not even day, as it comes… it’s the only way.
I wanted to go all the way. I said if I have to die many times – so be it. I wanted it so much… I have to do it on my own, completely and utterly in my own private hell… I had to leave, through conflict, to enable me to do that, to give up the crutches. I was offered Freedom. But the way to freedom is through me, not through another. The support I was generously given – made me weak.
I have it. Thank you.
Silence.
….Death No.3, hahaha, my Virgo has to give it a number… shite…
Hahahha! I also often scold my virgo for being too neat and my pisces dislikes the virgo to do list and step by step process lol! My bull practicality helps to balance the 2…. sigh.. quite a handful lol!
You have moon in Taurus right? How do you feed your moon? Lol 😀
Mari, I feel your love and our basic psychic connection from thousands of miles. I feel you as a very genuine and grounded soul, just like my beautiful friend the Bull.
Your question made me delve deep, and I wrote a big piece, which took me places… But for once I feel a barrier within me, preventing me from leaving a comment here…. maybe because too much has been exposed in public already, and it’s enough for my private soul.
… my ex was a Taurus with a Piscean Moon… In many ways his emotions are buried so deep he is unable to verbalise them. His silences (in respect of his inner feeling subjective states) created a great barrier to an emotionally fulfilling relationship for me, as an expressive Piscean. Yet, we are very much in each other’s lives, even after 12 years of divorce, living in neighbouring countries and him having a family of his own. I wonder if that difficulty of expression is something you also face.
I am sorry I cannot place it here, for all to see. Not any more.
Love
Ness
Dear Pluto,
The story was so familiar to me I forgot to mention that the girl didn’t know she had married her father’s murder, to the world it was his best friend who killed her father, so wanting to be part of her life, when he met her after they grow up, he didn’t tell her the truth, and the longer he waited, the harder it was to tell the truth… the question is hard for you to answer because you are not him, you will not make the same choice he made from the beginning…
In the book, his best friend upon heard his plan, punched him in the gut and told him to wake up. He told him he didn’t go to jail because he took the blame for the young man, he went to jail because THEY killed the famer together, he was not on the seat, but he cheered him on, so to the best friend went to jail to pay for his crime. He said to the young man, I went to jail, you killed your old self. Isn’t it enough? He asked the young man: are you the same punk you were? And are you the same insecure and coward jerk who married her? If you are, then stay the fuck away from her, you are going to have to fight me to go near that girl again. If you are NOT, then forgive yourself. Forgive the man you were, and let go of your own corpse you’ve been carrying. What is you motivation for your confession? Is it for her benefit or is it for yours? You want the burden of making a choice lay upon her shoulders when she didn’t put herself in that situation herself, and be free of you guilt. That is why you want to tell her, you don’t believe you are not her father’s murder anymore… and couldn’t act like the man who would never senselessly murder anyone for the rest of his life.
In the past I have told this story for the idea of “prudence of being the monster”
Now, I’m telling the story… to tell you…forgive yourself of your past. That past is a past of someone no longer existed. You are not him, you will not be him… needing the understanding and exhibition of that past is because you haven’t really let yourself go, you haven’t really believed you are not him anymore, so you bring his presence, his corpse with you everywhere you go…
Because that past is already forgiven in the presence of love.
All it needed now is the forgiveness from yourself. And bury him as he should be: rest in peace.
You are the eagle, A eagle was never a land crawler, that’s entirely a different creature.
Our surrender is to the energy of love, in the energy of love, we are as innocent as newborns.
Love,
jojo
You may be truly insane, but I don’t need to understand that, you don’t need to understand me at all, just try to understand yourself. There are zillion things in the world you and I will never understand and we live in peace with that don’t we? I mean you no harm and you are not capable of harming me, peace in “misunderstanding”, lol. now just take care of yourself. the end.
So much for ‘relating’… ‘love’.. and all that. Never mind, there was no harm in asking.
I understand now.
Good luck with… ‘enveloping’, JoJo.
and it does really hurt, JoJo. You will never know just how much. When someone is is sincere in her request, because they are lost in their understanding and are beginning not to trust their own perceptions… she takes everything so close to heart….and maybe because another person is very good at screwing with their head, and the heads of others… Maybe I am crazy. It’s fine.
You ‘love’ selectively. This is not love.
Be well, JoJo. Time will tell.
I don’t FUEL ambivalence and obsession. I will not help you to prolong your dying process and deviate you from what’s actually healthy. FIND silence. Yes, I don’t focus my energy on things I know will yield nothing but more entanglement in the meaningless. This is actually out of kindness toward you whether you can see it or not. and my self love. This is truly the last thing I will say on this matter. your silence awaits.
JoJo…
When you were in that position a couple of years ago… it took you a while to ‘find silence’, remember? And no one ‘pushed you’ to speed it up. So… I am sorry, but my sense is telling me you are intruding into my personal space GREATLY. You have intruded with your comment on what was not your concern, I now feel it was used for your own ends…. I asked for your clarification, granted, not very tactfully, but if noticed – I am not tactful, albeit if only here…. you declined to answer… and now you are intruding into my personal process that I am going through. Your masculine nature is taking over, and you are sounding like the Eagle now. It’s OK, each to their own. But I am telling you this…. I ‘me’ decide when it is time. So… back of, if you stated yourself you are not ‘looking for understanding’ Because I wasn’t either, before you barged in. And now – I don’t want to know. I know enough.
Believe it or not, that comment from JoJo felt the most hurful, because I was sincere in my puzzlement and the question and got a punch, haha… people are truly cruel even when it is served as ‘kindness’. Kindness would have been to answer the question in plain English and then maybe say ‘no engagement anymore’…. I smell a rat.
so… blackberries are the most democratic of berries… they grow everywhere, in every available space, without asking for special treatment or love or nurture, they nurture themselves through sun and air and rain, without a tender hand… and when time comes, their berries are free and available for all to pick… no questions asked… but, like everything in this cruel world of people, blackberries are then considered ‘second best’ because they are so available and unpretentious. Like that famous musician who played for free in the underground, and hardly anyone stopped to listen… then he would go back to daily job of playing to big concert halls, and people would pay big money to listen… how fucking hypocritical and ridiculous that is… people are hypocrites and dangerous and manipulative, and I don’t want to be part of the species anymore. Of all places, here I’ve experienced the most painful moments coming from others… served as ‘tough love’… I am not even sure anymore what love is and whether it exists, maybe all was just my perceptual delusion… in fact how can one simultaneously experience understanding – and total lack of it, rage – and love, believing in own voice – and totally disregarding it, thinking one is crazy and others are sane – and thinking the world out there is nuts, while one is totally OK… why so much duality suddenly is staring in the face… a split…
Others – will eventually unravel.
Gatubela, remember I said Pisceans do not have any external protection? Time to grow internal one, hey… Damn it, you are the only person whose love is feminine, comes totally from own core, without cloning from anyone, because you’ve made that choice a long time ago to know yourself… and is INCLUSIVE. Priceless, my dear cat. I love you for that. One day maybe I will simply love you because you are, not for anything specific. Be well, be happy, BE
Time to fuck off, really… If no one wants to ‘fuel obsessions and ambivalence’ just don’t comment. That would be truly – no ambivalence, in the absence of which – I vow only to be back if and when I find love. That’s all I need, my comprehension is total, my loving state is obscured by pain and anger and mistrusting THIS… whoever she is and whoever she will become…. this THING. And hey, mistrusting everyone else, that’s a new development in my book.
Cheers.
Actually, let’s do it in a TRUE Eagle style, hahaha… if people knew a multi-layered meaning of that…..
Since I am not in a loving state, and my naive faith in mankind has been demolished and replaced with a sewer… I am going to follow JoJo’s ‘advice’ she gave me once on telling something to the man who ‘wronged me’… This guy here didn’t really. He once said I am a bunny on many innocent levels… now I am a dark, twisted soul, in that space of the Underworld where he dragged me to… by taking away my trust in people, by being a mistrustful and messed up son of……………. he took away my core, which is NOT his underworld, and has never been. Sure, I will rebuild it. But not in his image. It will remain in trust and inclusivity with the mankind. The way this energy was meant FOR ME. Regardless of my offensive life experiences, comparable to his, except I didn’t loan money much as I never had much for my lack of appreciation of the material side.
So JoJo baby… feel proud of me here:
Eagle………………………………. FUCK YOU
Saying it lovingly. Because if you say ‘That’s all I’ve been asking for really, in my mood swings’… all you needed to DO was TO BE FUCKING DIRECT AND ASK IT. Not hide behind a woman. No one says ‘you are this, that and a moron, and you are not honouring my choices.’… One says ‘I want you to honour my choices if you really care for me’… Simple. SIMPLE. Remember the six questions, and my six answers, plain and direct? That’s the only language I understand, without games, and manipulation with a view to ‘transform’…
I change as I go through life myself, no need to push. When I moved countries my relatives said to me ‘You are not the same person anymore’….. when I got divorced my friends said ‘You are not the same person anymore’… I literally changed from a lost flower who didn’t have a clue about the world – into a woman with her own set of values, beliefs and meanings… Yes, it was hard. Change, meaningful change, does not happen only through an artificially, man created interjection. Maybe I shelved that love I felt for the world as a teenager. It was necessary, to survive. Now, when fate knocked on my door – I know the love will be back. It is time.
I hate Scorpio ambivalence. I hate Eagle’s ambivalence even more, because Scorpios, poor souls, are not aware, forgive them for the sin of being bastards at times, ‘for they do not know what they do’… His is hypocritical and much more dangerous. Knowing and yet, still BEING that Scorpio in action, and justifying it with ‘transformation’ intent.. How can a woman enter a relationship, to be then FORCEFULLY dragged to change.. Change for me… or go. Intent… intent… have I ASKED YOU to love me? Have you ASKED ME to love you? What was the REAL INTENT in both our actions if we didn’t ALLOW EACH OTHER TO BE AS WE ARE – OURSELVES? What was the bloody intent?
Here, Dear Mirror… Now the bridges are truly burned. Just like you have always done in your life. Like you have always run from peace. Like you have always run from involvement. Like you have always burned them… Look in THIS mirror of yours. Learn TO TRUST. Not en masse, with a faceless audience… Face to face with those you interact with every day of your life. Those in your physical world. No mask, to hide the beauty of that soul. Just the real YOU. Oh shit.. the real you ARE war… ARE conflict… ARE pain… ARE sadness… ARE ambivalence…. ARE torment… Just HOW MUCH LOVE is it going to take to counterbalance those? ALL A WOMAN HAS AND SOME… That is why many women, not one. Too much for any one woman to deal with many issues of yours.
Scorp No.2 (Scorpio Mars), wondered why they always leave. Women. He said they go and say ‘I am tired’. I remember now the sense of rejection I detected in his voice. He, HE, one of the strongest people I’ve ever met – FELT REJECTED…. He didn’t accept that as a valid explanation… bless him… they WERE fucking tired, of the constant war like, ambush situation they found themselves in… of being probed, examined, poked at all the time… of the energy which was so dominant (my way or highway) that left them gasping for air… Just IMAGINE, ladies, LIVING WITH THE WAR 24/7, non stop… you NEED to dissolve completely and kind of stop existing as your own entity… because non resistance ceases to create battles… the battles WILL be created for you, and you WILL be subjected to a drive for constant change… Be prepared… In return you will get a man who will die for you. Except… dying for you is easy, it is once and gone. For you the commitment is much much greater – a lifetime of complete non resistance. And then, ever so slowly, in the only way a woman can – your love will CHANGE him… or rather, he will change for your love. Don’t expect total abandonment of masculine power, oh no. Just a glimpse, here and there, of being a pup. He will only yield to love. ONLY.
Rejection brings… DETACHMENT. A defence mechanism pre-emptying the possibility. Argh…. All those hurtful exchanges take place because a Scorpio is feeling rejected… It is the energy to defend self from hurt. Eagle… In all your ‘enlightenment’, in all your beautiful ways of expression… you are the Scorpio through and through, magnified and a true specimen of a Scorpio energy condensed. I feel your pain on such unimaginable levels it resonates through me and tells me…. you BLEED. Like all of us. I was fucking stupid to believe otherwise…Even now… you bleed and carry on bleeding… I stayed because I love you, I love you, because I understand, the acceptance is there. But I am leaving, because I love myself, however much damaged she feels at the moment, and I need to take care of her first, before I can take care of anyone else. That, in essence, is what is happening here. My quadruple Pisces clashed with your quadruple Scorpios… all for self love.
There… writing that up… took me from anger to feeling compassion for you, and for myself…. I saw the ways in which we both hurt each other. What was my intent here? The true one, not the masquerading attempts at honesty…
Good bye.
P.S. to those horrified… as my mirror, Eagle will vouch for the authenticity of this outburst., he knows this energy inside out… He knows how to cut, he eats bunnies for breakfast, remember? And he knows how to love, too. You’ll survive, folks, really. In a week’s time all will be forgotten, done and dusted on here… until some naive soul wonders in….. Enjoy.
One time, there was a rich man, who had a man who looked after his lands, and fixed things around the property. He had hired this man, since he was very young. Of course, when he hired this man, he had alot of money and was very prosperous. His wife and children, were also very prosperous and enjoyed all of the benifits of the wealthy. This garden keeper, was responsible for looking after the plants and lands, which he did with uneducated simplicity and dedication, singing his songs. He did this simple thing, for many years. He lived on the grounds in a simple house that was given to him to live, so that he could always be available and not incur more expenses for his patrons in getting to work or making his lunch. The time came, when this man was already advanced in age, but still strong and working, that the wealth of his patrons diminished, due to hard times. Finances are like that, so this was no surprise to the garden keeper, who had clearly been studying nature for the past 30 years. He had the intimate knowledge of the cycles.
One day, the house simply fell into such a state, that there was no water. The faucets had broken down and they did not know how to fix it. They could not pay the garden keeper, to also be a plumber! However, due to the fact that the garden keeper did some extra work, he knew plumbing too!
He offered to fix the faucets and bring back the water to the house. The patron said, “Why are you helping me with this?”
The man said, “Because for many years, I have been able to live peacefully with the plants. You, with all of your wealth, do not know this peace.”
The conflict between balance, profound depth, rationality and dreams…is not silence. If it were silence, then it would have been “killed” years ago. You are doing what you have always done!!!
There is no ambivalence in duty because the knowledge of what has to be done, will be natural and kind. Falling into these abysses, are only to be able to see the light.
So, instead of habitually falling into your own darkness, guide yourself by any piece of light you can feel. It will feel so different, so foreign, that it is absolutely alright to love yourself.
Ambivalene is a great way to keep yourself in the dark.
Just saw this… thank you, Gatubela…. I feel my inner split so acutely, but I feel there is, somewhere deep in that, an energy which is crying to break out, like a fountain, to hit upwards and carry me with it…. it is only instinctive, nothing else..
What needs to be done is to take care of – ME. Her. I feel such compassion for that woman right now, as well as for the Eagle… it is killing me in many ways…
I am not detached in loving others. Never will be. When a person enters a relationship already in a state of detachment… it does not feel right to me. It simply feels dead. No dramas or control needed. But the feeling of another – has to be there. Everything I feel – I feel IMMENSELY.
.
Bless you
Rejection should not bring detachment…not if you truly love as a state of healing.
Rejection is actually the opposite of acceptance. But all of us people who have been nearly killed for our individuality, know that true acceptance of who YOU are, is the energy felt as love, when you face your death. It won´t depend on “a man”…he will not be there when you face your maker….when you look in the mirror, you are alone with that reflection.
“Scorpio is feeling rejected”…
His soul is never rejected…only what limits him is.
Let it be. All of us have choices.
There exits incomprehensible peace within me. I am the captain of my intense soul. When fearful motivation in another threatens that deep inner peace… of course I will naturally defend it to the dismay of any hateful enemy.
If the fish swimming frantically in her streams of delusions “thinks” it can love the eagle who is about to swoop down and rip the it’s guts out and eat it, then that oceanic disillusioned fish is swimming in vain through a false stream of it’s own existential dreams.
If the eagle flying high in the sky can literally see the fish’s mercurial motivation to swim frenetically through her plight to live deliriously away from her mystical nature, if the eagle can see far clearer and more in profound depth than the fish could ever see herself, then that eagle must show her. If the fish doesn’t want to see, it can always keep evading the tides of conflict as it always has done through it’s oceanic “reality” to blame others.
The fish’s oceanic nature failing to coalesce with our solar center, the sun, the ego, combined with the martyrdom of mercury rising, transmits a terminal barrage of rational thoughts, not knowing stillness. When no cohesion of ego and dream exists out of the water… then perfect chaos in that perception of life is the manifestation of what we all see. We all… the people breathing quite ok out of the water.
It is not I who does not be the love. It is the clear lack of individuation expelled through a fish-virgin martyrdom which cannot, by it’s very nature, find true center in it’s self-induced misery. A clasping for air to breathe as the eagle plucks her out of the water. The salmon’s own dream.
The eagle will kill any creature foolish enough attempting to extract his divine center and pull him into that misery of dreams.
Maintaining a powerful equilibrium, his center, through the eagle’s eternal nature, is only achieved by shredding or killing via inevitable conflict as he must survive with the rest of nature. Whatever disease of mind intrudes into his powerful boundary, and actually thinks they can claim rights to an equal union with him, has simply met their own death.;)
Yes, let it be. You love. If in the only way you know how to love. But I didn’t ask you to love me.
I feel your stillness right now, it is calm and even… serene… . That is because… YOU KNOW. You are at ease because of that knowledge. Thousands of words cannot change that. I am happy for you.
http://www.verylol.com/i-ll-show-you-the-world-lol-1546/
Actually, my God… there are more gems in what was written above than I have seen in months of dead communication.
Argh… understanding of each other’s natures…. it truly humbles me.
Thank you.
LoL…I am not always feminine…hahaha!
I do have my dark side…completely destructive and self serving, if I let it out and not consciously choosing the light and love with self knowledge, control of myself and humility. I am not a slave of my own darker nature, but by doing so, I became the slave of others. It is very much like what P.Puppy said, when you do what people want you to do. Scorpionic nature WILL transform that, even if it takes years.
Any action or state of being, is chosen with the objective of “not dreaming” and releasing those “magical enslavements” By magical , I mean our perception does not perceive them, because we opt for negativity and escapism, which are great prisons of entertainment, which blind us to our souls. Just as loving silently has a great occult (hidden) significance, so do our occult bonds of slavery, as they usually are karmic or collective. Therefore, where they were forged, is where they must be released through understanding duality >>> unity.
The heart grounds the occult forces in our lives, if you surrender.
I have not met a man, who truly feels what it means when a woman frees herself. Not many go beyond the reaction of wanting to kill me, do me, humiliate me or hate me. They all want to regain control of the situation.
This is why true honesty is so important in these energies. A man who is honest, and gives himself, is a man whose very soul should be treasured.
Women are light years from understanding the sacred energies in this kind of man.
i just wonder if there is a chance under all this macho Scorpio man, that they could be gay and how would i realise that……i suspect one of firends who is Scorpio to be gay…i know they have a dark side to them also they are a bit into kinky stuff
Hi Cat…
Ummmm…geez.
You would have to trust your own intuition, I would imagine.
Eagle…
If you want to speak in metaphors…. The Fish has no protection…. it feeds a lot of species, offered up to keep others who are hungry – satisfied and alive, while dying itself. This may be perceived by others as martyrdom, but it is realisation that in this world something or someone HAS TO DIE, IF ANOTHER IS TO LIVE. THAT, in essence, is its immortal wisdom and understanding of Death as part of the life cycle. The Death of Human Ego through conscious realization of own physical Death and its connection to all there is in the Universe…. The constant pull to separate from the tangible of this world and go back to THAT – is too real and too dangerous.. The Fish accepts that it may be her who has the quickest route to Death. So, the ego of this Fish (any Fish, for that matter) is young, unformed, fragile, to allow her to die without complaint. Like in real life… when one faces death in old age – one’s egotistic desires become totally irrelevant = ego death.. Why then, when faced directly with the predator – DIRECTLY… the Fish will want to live? Observe those who fight furiously trying to get off the hook…. Because that one moment, that very intense moment in time – the Fish becomes connected to physical Life. Away from the search for Consciousness. It becomes mortal, like all others. It NEEDS to keep the perspective on life. In real life it manifests as quest for ‘drama’ in those Fishes who do not understand themselves.
And Pisceans are very unaware of themselves generally, because they are so immersed in others…. And why are they immersed in others? That pull to connect to another’s Consciousness beyond own. Hence, the sensitivities, the easy ‘hurt’ nature, the defensiveness, the ability to attach themselves too easily and too quickly to people…. Without those psychic sensitivities the connection is impossible, try to connect to an emotionless, insensitive, non- reactive robot…. Pisceans are good with people. They are crap with themselves.
Piscean ego CANNOT manifest in the absence of a soulful course. But the mortal requirements of daily survival IGNORE that truth out there. Who gives a flying fuck about soulful manifestations in the world of greed, cars, clothes, exotic holidays, five star hotels, fake tanned bodies, rapping artists singing about misery and wearing fucking golden chains around their necks…. Any Fish know that INSTINCTIVELY, they do not need lessons on societal pressures and the value of inner world. This is when what you call ‘no cohesion of ego and dream’ – takes place. It breaks down for many Pisceans, faced with the soulless, meaningless reality out there. When their egos NEED MANIFESTATION OF SPIRIT, not the form… The ego is drowned in useless, faceless dream, unable to manifest self constructively…
I know you want me to grow a backbone, because you understand the fragility of my nature. I know you’ve protected me in many ways, when you could have REALLY TAKEN to that hammer, again, because you appreciate the fragile, no matter your penetrating nature.. But THIS IS NOT THE POINT. The point is… there is no point in any of this.. I accept all non-cohesive, life time accumulated foibles of your Personality… we are all non-cohesive, until that day when we know True Love…. I accept the High Consciousness dwelling in your Soul… you were LUCKY to both ENTER that State and RETAIN it… But you cannot FORCE me to love you in the way you want… until the day it happens.. It is very simple: I have entered, and I have lost. You cannot keep putting the gun to my temple, in the hope it will help me die. Conflict FOR THE SAKE OF CONFLICT is meaningless. And that’s the only truth there is between us. Nothing separates us. You know that too.
Help let it happen, darling… The one and the very best thing you could do for me now – stop talking to me. Ignore. I do not exist. Can you do that? I will not write anything remotely mentioning you, if write anything at all. I am not running. I am not looking for artificial peace. If you truly understand the psyche of mine – you will understand why I’m asking that. I am WALKING AWAY from inner peace.
Let it be, darling, for now.
“.Observe those who fight furiously trying to get off the hook….”
I have.
For four years in this electronic realm. And for about seven years as a soul in the flesh.;)
” Without those psychic sensitivities the connection is impossible,”
Yes.
That is why you must be aware of how to ‘Discern’ and ‘Discriminate’ (Virgo) what Psychic Sensitivities (Pisces) you see and feel in the minds of others. That awareness is absolutely crucial for your spiritual growth.
The self-induced criticism within the micro nature of the virgin from literal subjective perceptions, is trying to find some kind of meaning in that dire attachment to form. That chaotic attachment to form is nit-picked, much like a hen, by what everyone else is perceiving between each other on the superficial level. So that is why a virgin must discriminate and open her eyes and see people’s minds unfolding from an objective viewpoint.
The goal is to function objectivity (detachment) of ones quicksilver personality, TO SEE, beyond ones insufferable prison.
Exercise your discernment muscles by looking for a larger pattern in your perceptions. Pay close attention to your own thought paradigms and how they are making you feel. But you must first learn meditation (Pisces) and slow the mind to a complete stillness. When martyrdom is realized in your unknown with people… DETACH… and breathe. See yourself with absolute integrity to the inner voice, before you micro analyse a fear that is not true;)
Also…
It is healthy that you maintain your Virgin nature ‘to Serve’. Service in your soul is meaningful. But you must constantly develop a ‘Discerning’ (Virgo)… Imagination (Pisces) in the world of human limitation, suffering and ego-myth.
Remember from an objective viewpoint from here high on my clifftop, I can see and feel your suffering and the meaning it is trying to yield.
So just be aware of who you are serving. Especially the void of not serving your own needs. Because basically all service performed and embedded in the herd psyche is serving a disease laced in the agendas of man’s self-interested myth. e.g… everywhere you look in the workplace. Look at what god you are serving in your own career. Does your service hold meaning… which honestly MAKES YOU FEEL HAPPY?
These are questions you must ask yourself while serving other people in the world if you want to find personal meaning. In essence, what you are striving for is an independent choice to serve people who can see (reflect) your heart back to them. People, bosses, managers, who are void of any gratitude in your service should be???……….. Discerned….of whether that service is aiding your happiness and spiritual growth.
So this self-awareness needs a solid self first. An identity with boundaries. An identity who knows what is of true value in their relationships and what is literally a cancer to their happiness.
This is an intricate, complex set of ideas, a cosmic consciousness which you may or may not want to develop. If you are content, nourished and at peace in your current mental states of existence then simply ignore what I have offered you.;)
Dear Pluto,
I’m humbled to be in the presence of the true eagle, free from the entanglement of past memories. How magnificent it flies when all that’s been holding him back were noting compare to the strength its wings took its full span and just…take off. I have felt when the innards hadn’t found peace with certain acts, how it eats at a soul of compassion and love. I’m honored you have honored me unconditionally with your intentions, and that gesture truly is enough. We live in our state of evolution and consciousness to free the spirits. This is what I wish for you, freedom to follow your heart and your soul, your compassion and your freedom. Compassion and love, they do not conflict each other when the gift of the Cosmo is to expend, add, to our being. So I’m truly happy to see soulful and compassionate relating in any dynamics. In the past I haven’t respected soulless acts of people’s acts toward each other and haven’t felt wrong in giving love when love was lacking, when I feel your pain and unrest, the love in me compels me to answer, and I did. The other part of me that is self love tells me to respect soulful relating and keep a healthy distance for self-love. The complexity of us when serving the flow of the Cosmo simplifies.
In my past something pretty similar had happened but in a much greater scale, in the ambivalence of everyone involved, it was a painful mess. I felt how differently your act of honor induced in me so much love and compassion in return, you are very right in the fact women manifest what men given them. Thank you for that seed of love. In the past I have told people “I understand compassion, all I asked was for you to have the decency to let me go while dealing with that past”. I have asked for the freedom from emotional attachments away from a situation I know would not be healthy for me to get involved. Now I don’t ask anymore, it has become a choice I have to make, I truly respect other woman, and respect myself, and in certain delicate relating, three is truly a crowd. Remember there was a time I was so blind and insensitive that I brought to you such senseless suffering…there are certain things we don’t need to know.
.
Heal…as eagles do via their soulful purpose. I Love in silence, and feeling very proud to be of witness.
Thanks JoJo,
I would like to perceive myself as an empowering example toward others here and out in my real life every day. As opposed to an arrogant figure. People may think they’re ‘independent’ in relationships of all kinds, but what I have noticed in my deaths and re-births, and psychically felt through my sexual human experience… is that most people truly are not independent (free) of mind, or heart, so they cannot see any other possibilities available from the model of reality they’ve adopted in childhood, and in school, and from parents, college’s and in relationships as adults.
I just see and feel monumental limitations in the herd mentality. Intellects that do not challenge me because they’re incapable of it. I at times feel compelled to scare them out of that slumber by penetrating fear into their tiny world. But for a few years now I see my path has really been about focusing on my own evolutionary journey and not caring at all who listens to me, when I do actually talk. So just by being at peace in the infinite knowing I have been given, brings me tremendous joy, not concerned with ground level self-image or ground level perceptions of “success”. Because that embodiment of being is fleeting. It is nothing near eternal with the Maker.
When I let others be themselves, I am free.
The more I have grown and developed in social responsibility of my unique personable nature… the more I’ve realized that I have a spiritual obligation to ‘not kill’ people (in mind) if they do not ask for that death. So being the best man I can be in loving discernment of others through my eternal world is an extraordinarily blissful state felt through my existence.
Because I am so far removed intellectually from yappy, petulant, quarrelsome people with zippy the attention span of a frozen lama, bombarding me from left and right each day. For example, each day I walk through a busy shopping center to buy groceries with thousands of people among me… scampering around in noisy haste to feed their subconscious hungers, i.e (self-image, self-importance). So in my true silence as I walk among hundreds of people blissfully scurrying in their own little realities, I feel an immortal psychic sense that each person believes themselves to be real and unique LoL… when I know that the collective myth is simply not true when…. I listen in… (as I always do) when I listen and perceive ‘the actual substance’ of their conversations.
When the darkness of others energies is apparent to me, directed at me in their hidden agenda (because I am the dark by nature) I will be as super-conscious of their self-deception and blindness to elicit a reaction they could “use” from me, knowing in my occult experience with people, an intention for attachment with me raises my antenna… because it’s as if I immediately know the energy of their subconscious need to attach, to coerce, to befriend, to impress me through superficial matters, ‘is not known’ to them. So in my constant evolution, my freedom, I now have to demonstrate each time to any person that I am in fact my own man. I show them this… of how different I actually am, not by preaching, but by simply being… through the power of my vast expression. A few short words is all… and the herd is stumbling over their feet.
Gatubela,
I know you are Jupiter rising. Sagittarius rules your first house of the mask. So you are innately different socially and expansively ‘in how’ you can relate and see the manifestations of people’s behavior from a distance. As opposed to a subjective slinging match which goes nowhere. I feel that you gain a natural pleasure from studying people, as I do… you more on impersonal levels… me, being the eagle… on both personal and impersonal in dance with each other. You’ve noticed this dance in your last post by acknowledging the duality I reveal and the unity I reveal which is an energy of oneness. So thank you sweetheart as usual for being present with my nature
So as a Pisces Rising mask, I just know that each person has a different (but incredibly similar) model of reality spoken through the words deciphered at the superficial level… through the innate vision of my Scorpionic glaring intensity… known to go way way deep into their little fragile baby souls. Haha.
Well…I do have my water side to me.
I often observe people, and they never know what I am really doing under my shell.(s)
Who knows? Maybe I am dancing too.
An identification of all 12 signs… through mastering of those psychic energies for the growth of heart, mind and soul, in tune with and watchful observation of their intricate interplay, the dance of the Psyche…
What you do for me in these moments of true relating is giving an expression to what dwells within me silently… village idiot, remember? And your last expression just confirms within me… nothing separates us in that eternal space of Consciousness that exists BETWEEN us… all that clashed – perishable tangible forms, not immortal intuitive perceptions.
I am personable. I am subjective. I am animalistic. I am visceral. I am corporeal. This is my TRUE nature. But I can also be objective, social, detached, intellectual, spiritual… a tremendous effort of bringing those to work in unity.. if one is aware.
I am very aware, baby
The language of love… takes unexpected forms sometimes..
x
And…
Thank you for trusting me, and in me. Yes, I know it has always been IN there… But if you could only comprehend the PAIN of watching it through impenetrable, but clear (to me) glass wall… in a glass like vessel, the precious liquid, so close, yet untouchable… the thirst for TRUSTFUL relating and the lack of it…
You understand the madness it is capable of inducing in me.
This is when stillness, through observation of own mind as it fearfully attempts to attach meaningless ‘meanings’ to any given situation – is embraced and nurtured.
I attempted to take what could not be given… until all attempts cease.
Let it be.
sugar… I just realised that the village idiot… does not dwell silently within me, hahaha!!!!!
That’s not what I meant! I meant an unspoken instinctual knowledge dwells in me, and this village idiot (me) cannot put it into words..
This mishap demonstrates that the proof is in the pudding LOL
Gatubela, I perceive your nature as masculine actually. It is not a reactive force, but quite the opposite – active in its expression… But the manifestation of your love is feminine… this is how it feels to me. Quite a balance to achieve.
…To know the sky, an eagle must know the sewer. The underworld of man…
Ppuppy, your exchanges with Jojo in the recent posts are just beautiful to watch and feel… 🙂
….You ARE the better man…I feel loved and respected…for this honor, somewhere deep inside of me I love and will always love you for restoring some of that total faith I have lost in men…Pluto…thank you…
Thank you for sharing jojo… that is just beautiful…
Only a man who has mastered his own inner hell can truly love and protect a woman. The transformative effect helps restore parts of me that I’ve lost or had been taken away. The respect… the feeling that there is a man who can actually see my inner beauty so I should also nurture and nourish it because I am after all worth it. No more Pisces emotional and physical reaction of feeling sorry and self denial. Though part of me will always belong to the sea lol (Ines I know you can relate hahaha hugs)… I can come out of my ocean now with open heart because I have learned to trust my own energy and able to see things with clarity… like I can’t choose to harm myself anymore no matter what life throws at me or when caught up with those forks in the road. I don’t know… I just feel free from those repeating cycle of sufferings of my heart. I know I still have so much to experience and so much to learn. God… I am very much willing to learn…
Ppuppy, I don’t need to throw my sufferings on you for you to understand and for me to understand your message… your language of love to all of us here. I honestly would have not known how to deal with the test and trials for the past 1 and half year without discovering this gem in the internet. I would probably still live in blur away from people to protect myself. Being self taught is difficult… I have zero support from my parents since I was in my mother’s womb. The scorpionic death and rebirth has showed me that I don’t need one to discover who I really am. I often come here to read and breathe fresh air in silence. I hardly write but your teachings are the ones I manifest in my tangible life. You have not taken me under wings to protect me from the darkness of life but you have shared your tools, your wisdom freely to grow my own wings to fly.
I will probably never ever perfectly understand the underworld mysteries and the journey you’ve been through to battle your own pain and misery to be the Phoenix that you are today but I am always thankful to God and will give back to the universe in my own way for allowing me to know you.
Thank you.
Love,
Mari
Mari I feel humbled and bonded with you too. I’m so happy you have found the insight to grow in self-knowledge, love, courage and truth. Your openness touched me… so thank you. I will always be gentle with you and any person who knows… actually knows… my individual principles and desire to move forward.
Stagnation in life, through narrow perception deceiving the heart… are like crustaceans submerged under a wharf. If we want real freedom, our heart has to know the truth of what it wants and the truth of love witnessed as it exists in the present. I am so happy that you are experiencing changes felt within you, and in your perceptions of people amid your life.
I could never abuse the deep understanding and feminine reception you have learned from perceiving me.
Love
Pluto
Dear Mari, Pluto,
Our journeys are meant to teach us about ourselves through every experience, follow our truth of the moment and these lessons will flow into us if we don’t resist it.
For the past short month, I’m gaining consciousness at every waking moment; it’s intense, and transforming. I’m very grateful… The most “stretching” experience is a sense of tapping into the world of entirely different energies… through feeling, watching, relating, observing the super conscious as well as ambivalence of the water energy, I’m sensing an entirely different world from what I know…
it feels so foreign to me, I have and is easy for me to maintain a constant hold to the Consciousness, the Cosmo, Perception, Objectivity, Detachment, Clarity…at the state of my current evolution…these Air energy has not (in my self-understanding and ability to connect to people via perception) hindered my ability to love and give love to people…as I have believed… I have always felt none-responsive to the perceptions of “ love can only be achieved a certain way comfortable only to one’s own energy”, much like the story of six blind men describing the elephant. But I have also known our journey of expending is limitless, timeless, without boundary, far beyond what has been achieved, perceived, known. Finding the way into that unknown if often the journey. In my experience that journey has been to walk the road faithful to your own dignified realism, self-honesty, even the ones that are “wrong” … I do not and had never own experiences that were given to me from teachings or advices or perceptions alone. I tap into energies and life enlightenment from demonstrations of incredible beings I have met along my journey. But most of all, the most soul reaching evolution I have gained was trough experiences learned by follow my own footsteps of being limited, wrong, fearful, unaware, self-protecting… when we are attracted to acts of our limitation, there often meant to be a lesson learned. The bravery is not to be afraid to learn it. Don’t be resistant to the truth when and if it reaches you… that’s all it really matters, that we are open to the voice within, and receptive to the voice above.
Mari, You are a sweet loving soul, I can sense that in you very clearly. Yes, acts can have such profound effect on us, it restores faith, hope, and trust… thank you for your loving comment. Pluto….words are unable to form what I feel…
what I feel, has nothing to do with what I learned, what I chose, what I act upon… it has nothing to do if I’m free to feel it or not… it just…feel…and if I can’t face you with it… it feels like a betrayal to myself, to you.
Somewhere deep in me, I know the world would be a much truer place if only hearts do the talking, not acts… if hearts do the talking…there will be no talking, but songs…like this one…
I now feels the pain of unable to break free from the prison that’s my mundane form and my choices… I don’t know where I am in the force of nature that is your path of truth, may be a summer rain, few autumn leaves, fog on a Sunday morning, rose petals that lend some fragrances on your shoulder while you passed by…
No matter what happens and where you are going where I will be, I love you Pluto, that’s all.
love,
jojo
Within the immortal eagle existence lives the affection and celebration of this….. life and love in it’s most simplest, pure form.
awwww adorable! they yawn a lot lol!…..so peaceful and still….
The puppy energy of Pluto Pup 😉
Oh Noooooooooooo
Too – – – much – – – -cuteness!!!
All of a sudden, its hard to concentrate, and I just want cuddle up to one of those bundles of fur and adorableness.
¿Was the my heart melting to …….butter?
Puppy paws look yummy to nibble on too, it seems
Cassandra. Everyone has their own cross to bear.
The enormity of it, the meaning of it, is surging through my veins and feeding my spirit..
I realise that while a lowerly Scorpion would generate the same kind of dynamics with me… the result would have been different. Why… my nature is all encompassing, by birthright, and now, too, is yours, through gaining the wisdom of own choices… It doesn’t matter that its expression feels aggressive and antagonising. What’s underneath that expression – is acceptance on a very PROFOUND level. Because of THIS – it is so easy for us to come back to face each other after the most ferocious fights, look into another’s eyes – and forgive each other… A Scorpio lizzard would have unforgivably punished and stung, for the mere satisfaction of his ‘hurt’ feelings. You – in the league of your own there, baby.
You could have WALKED AWAY any day… ANY DAY, in the past ten months… you NEVER did. You let me get away with murder really.. Do you think I didn’t know it? Everything is personal, remember? The friendship, or whatever it was called – will never be over, I knew it then – I know it now more than ever. And I don’t know why there is such a drive on both our parts to connect to, hell bent on exploring another’s Psyche, at the cost of ‘comfortable’ existence. It is – a drive to learn through another. My mind transmitted to you my doubts, making you distrust YOURSELF, if only for a fraction of time… what you call ‘cancer’. When people try to infiltrate your stillness, that inner equilibrium which is incredibly hard to achieve and which you worked so hard for… the inner power of self knowledge giving us strength to resist any attempts for others to break in and feed us with THEIR insecurities.. All is so simple… words… I hate words…
For something or someone to live – another has to die = outlived modes of one’s Consciousness, all possible modalities of perceiving and processing the Self and the world around… no words.
I feel you on many levels… none of it killed you, none of it caused you suffering, none of it harmed you because you are so aware of every powerful emotion that surges through you. You do not LET them kill you. None of it harmed me either, the suffering is not harming me, never did. Now you may understand why I said ‘everything passes through me without causing harm’. It does NOT MEAN IT DOESN’T CAUSE CHANGE… Oh baby… words.. words, I hate words… It’s taken me to find my own power, from deep within.. So… no apologies. Just plain gratitude for who you are, for your existence in this world, for knowing you, for letting me be part of you, for your love, for your moods, and emotions, and thoughts and all the beauty and all the shite that dwell in you.
Let’s face it – the joy of finding meaning comes to both of us through – meaningful emotions. Your dream of a powerful and detached Queen…. SHE MAY EXIST, BUT.. I know who you are. If we fight again – I will not fight with hate or anger or fear in my heart. I will fight with love for you and myself, and may be then it will be a different kind of fight, the one I have never experienced yet, and you may show me how. You know how a mother lovingly observes her kids play, and all she feels in her heart is love and amusement and joy for them? Well… you are that kid in my heart right now… the man, the farther, the child… you constantly take on different forms and each form is a way for me to connect.
We COULD fight… but my subjective nature is calling for withdrawal from what has become a public exhibit. The deep fall has not ended. This Galatea has some woman to grow.
For me this song has so many layers…. it’s a conversation with the divine self
“And I don’t know why there is such a drive on both our parts to connect to, hell bent on exploring another’s Psyche, at the cost of ‘comfortable’ existence.”
You don´t know why you do the things you do?
For the women who look in their own mirrors…
“You know how a mother lovingly observes her kids play, and all she feels in her heart is love and amusement and joy for them? Well… you are that kid in my heart right now… the man, the farther, the child… you constantly take on different forms and each form is a way for me to connect.”
I don’t need a mother. Get out of my business!
Every thought you have said/written is only in your head because of ME. Not because of you. You disgust me, actually.
I don’t trust your intentions. The motivation laced in your responses, thanks again… to my seeds. You’re so blind and sick it is quite disturbing to me. Find a little boy to manipulate and mother. You don’t know me. And you sure as hell don’t know yourself.
So stop taking and taking and actually believing that you know yourself.
Lies are the cancer. That’s what you are. One huge unconscious lie.
I have NOT been communicating WITH YOU personally here. My affection was with JoJo, Gatubela and Mari. Your insufferable neediness, which you still can’t admit in yourself, had to steal my intent which WAS NOT directed at you personally.
When I write something to a person, I mean every word.
Stop twisting, politicizing and deceiving my authenticity through my message. It makes me only want to kill.
Good bye;)
What ARE my intentions? Why do you not trust me?
If you mean every word then ‘Good Bye’ means ‘Good Bye’
Good Bye.
Are you calm? It was Scorpio Mars yesterday, most people experienced or felt some form of contention, worries and criticism… a storm in a teacup really.
I was surprised, but no more than that.. Whatever you saw – is not there, just my way of expression. I guess it is not the way of others here, and that’s fine. I am who I am.
It’s OK, really. I wish you the most amazing life, darling. Be well:)
JoJo,
There is something I want to share with you. As I wrote, felt and read things in the last couple of months or so… I am beginning to see how it all comes together in a person. And what is to be done to make it all flow, instead of torturously trying to fight – own psychological make up. And also, your unique being and your journey made me appreciate and truly feel how and why ALL our paths differ so much, yet lead to One Truth.
I mentioned before that my Pisces dislikes my Virgo, because the Virgin greatly interferes with my states of feeling.. Those two are OPPOSITE on the Zodiac, a nightmare of clashing energies… Discernment of feeling and thought, both in self and others’ realities, instead of blindly plunging into each of those separately, with no unity or cohesion – was alien to me…. The feeling subjective nature of this Fish was NOT OBSCURED by her Virgin rationality, despite much contention it caused on here….. What happened was – she had NO TOOLS of calling on that Virgo ability to discern. She had NO TOOLS to call on that Piscean ability to OBJECTIVELY feel, hahah!! Paradox, isn’t it… feelings ARE objective in a sense that they do not get obscured by thoughts, so they are pure and truthful. BUT… IF we know how to make the two work in UNION.
I never did in the past… much like Eagle… the tide of feelings carried me over, without standing aside and observing those with a detached view, and asking myself through the POWER OF MY MIND if what I was feeling and seeing – had any basis in reality. Our unconsciously realised fears manifest as a feeling, then get picked up by the mind and span out of control.. and sometimes our thoughts are thought negatively (in my case – thanks, Virgo), and transmute into a feeling which haunts us and feeds itself back into the mind… the vicious circle to break only through NOTICING and BREAKING THE PATTERNS.
So I am walking from feeling to mind back to feeling, trying to connect those. This is how it will work FOR ME SPECIFICALLY. For Eagle – it is primarily the feeling state, him being Water both in essence (Scorpio) and form (Neptune Rising) You will say so what… Your Libra nature is air, rational, objective, with a fantastic ability to detach and see clearly. The balance of objectivity achieved through communication and PERCEPTION of others (your emotional tool), not withdrawing from them, which, by the looks of it – you have been doing.. You see…. my Piscean Sun is in the Libra house… I guess what I am trying to say… all of us need BOTH our emotional and our rational brains to work TOGETHER, but HOW we apply that – is very individual… while for most people the disconnection is complete and leaves them in the darkness as to why they are so much in misery… at the mercy of their own minds and bodies… oh the wisdom of seeing this…
And to be free in the mind…. every time I now catch a thought trying to invade me that is not welcome – I expel it by simply acknowledging its presence. No judgement. Just presence.. All halts then, those few seconds of emptiness, until the mind attempts to do that again and again… I zap them = meditation.
Maybe, it’s written a bit haphazardly, as you know I am not great with verbal expression. That’s how it feels to me. It is only a tiny part of Conscious Awareness that hugged me and said ‘You ALREADY KNOW. Just let it out.’
Part of what I understood – was due to your experience. Thank you.
“The balance of objectivity achieved through communication and PERCEPTION of others (your emotional tool), not withdrawing from them, which, by the looks of it – you have been doing.”
Well, this is an interesting statement for me. Objectivity seems to be an Air element. But it can also be a water one as well. For me, there are many ways to detach. Since you mention AIR…
Objectivity obtained by having the psychic perception of someone´s divinity. You know it is there (AIR) but do you FEEL it? Objectivity obtained by feeling oneself and your own energies…
Objectivity means nothing without love, otherwise, we might be prone to being psychopaths and not having empathy towards each others souls.
LoL
Objectivity obtained through feeling the cosmos…objectivity obtained by keeping your word and going through the experience of what that truth means…objectivity obtained through having your own rules of virtue….
Objectivity obtained through the desire to not cause harm to yourself and others, makes you clearly see in the mirror, who you aren´t.
The beauty of not being objective for a woman….is a woman surrendering (we will keep the video as objective as possible – but you get the idea)
The view from life…..
Cherry Blossoms…
“The transience of the blossoms, the extreme beauty and quick death, has often been associated with mortality”
“A cherry blossom painted on the side of the bomber symbolized the intensity and ephemerality of life;”
“Resplendent in full bloom, cherry blossoms seldom last more than a week, and they are easily swept away with one strong wind, a fleeting beauty that suggests purity and transience.”
“Today, cherry blossoms are connected to innocence, spring and simplicity.”
The view from death….
Sometimes I don’t know what to say… heart melting affection from heart melting puppies that makes you want to hold them forever… the difficulty of speaking when emotions render words silent… it kind felt like death again… understanding so many things I didn’t understand before about souls with different energy… the feelings of wrongness of past deeds. The need to pause and let stillness went through but unable to quite noises inside… at times like this I try to divert my energy to something surface to quite myself down… I want to stay silent, but can’t because in that silence there is a softness wanting to say something simple as “good morning” or “good night” … so, have a good day at work, have a good night of sleep. Puppy, Bella, Mari.
Bella, how did you even know?…about the cherry blossom? it gives me goose bumps….
I’m submerged in a kind of silence hard to describe, almost feels like words are too intimate and too private to utter… I have written this last part of the love story days back, and finished it today; it will speak in a silence that needed sound.
A love story is half told, when it was told through only one heart. The rest of it was at the scene of the the aftermath of a battle ground. A man was lying amongst the many once able bodies scattered upon lands, ditches, other bodies. A man was lying there with most of his life bleed away. The mercy of the creator has it when bodies went into shock, it didn’t feel pain, in that brief time when death was emanating from every shallow breath it took, we see life, rather than death, right before our eyes. The man was a born warrior, he spent most of his life fighting the invading attempts of the hunting tribes up north, when winters were harsh, these attacks were at its worst. Last winter was one of the worst, he had fought through everyone of them knowing death was intimate, it breaths done his neck, took his brothers at arms every time he took the sword and rode with them into the wind. He had to shut it out, matter of when, but before that, he and the others were what stood between the many small villages he passed through every time riding from peace to war.
This day, before death took him, there was one small village stayed in his mind, its name, size, indifference from many other small villages was all he had remembered until that fateful day in spring.
It was one of the time he need to make time for something urgent, he hadn’t eaten or slept much in days, riding was the only thing on his mind. When he entered the small village, it was like any other he had entered, dogs barked, dusty and winding road. Then somewhere down the path, there were something he never seen in small villages like this before. It was a yard full of flying snow of cherry blossoms, the pink petals danced in the soft wind and falling delicately onto grass, walls, ground, or just, dancing. He had seen cherry blossoms like this before, but not in villages like this, mostly he would see fruit trees or just trees for the purpose of shading. He was an observant man, almost nothing escapes him, the senses of the warrior are always open and alert. So when his horse passed by that small yard of dancing petals, he turned his head and looked through it…
There was a woman standing next to a line of cloth that was hanging in the wind, she was looking at him too, her cloth was washed so many times the color had faded to the shade of the blossoms dancing around her, it seemed as if the petals had gained form and was looking back at him, it was a picture he hadn’t seen in many places, like that one time, he had to bury his brother at arms, someone whose name he didn’t know, when he moved his limb body, under his broken bones, the ground was soaked with blood, except there was one yellow flower, caught between the dead man’s cloth somewhere and was bright yellow, clean, untouched. So out of place but beautiful, he didn’t know why, but he put it in the pocket near his brother’s heart and buried him with it. Things like this always touched him in some way, he didn’t share this with anyone, not his brothers, a man need to be reckon with when matters were life and death, he command respect, the rest, is his private moments no one had yet been invited to share. There was something about the woman, the out place yard of cherry trees made him stop, he was a man of intuition and experience, he had known when something in the gut command him to stop, he had to listen to it.
He rode back slowly, taking in the picture like he drinks water, slowly, thoroughly until it reaches the dry and thirsty place. The woman was holding a red skirt in her hand, it had been washed so many times like the cloth she was wearing, but that red color was once so vibrant it hadn’t manage to faded enough through all that washing, he wondered why he didn’t see it right away, somehow the colorless shape of the woman was more vibrant than the skirt she was holding. Then it hit him, why there was something made him stop, he recognized the way she was holding herself, looking at him… she was not afraid of him, women he met in his hard life was not at ease with him, he understood that, he didn’t command friendliness from the life he lived, who he was. He was a warrior, life and death was what radiates from him. The woman standing in the yard looking at him was looking at him with dignity and grace, as the way she was holding the cloth in her hand, with dignity and grace. This was also something he didn’t see from villagers of his travels, dignity and grace in the life of the nameless villages of no importance and no difference, why? Then it hit him again, the cherry blossoms, the vibrant red skirt, the unwavering look, the dignity and grace… He sees himself in his spirit of a warrior, on the battle ground, amongst the soft face of the peaceful folks in town, at court with other officers, he was HIM, he walked into life, life never walked into him, he sees himself in her, he sees this is how she would live in a nameless village, or in the palaces of many masks. He felt something inside of him move, he had never expected to see himself in a woman, he lives to protect them, and they were soft creatures or chatty voices or warmth in bed at a cold night. He was taken back, stopped dead in his track, he stares at her like he stares at life or death, he didn’t know what it all means… but he felt desire like he never felt it before, he drank her face in like he drank water, slowly, thoroughly, until it reaches the dry and thirsty places.
He saw her lips move, but no words came out, her feet took a step, but she didn’t move forward, her hand clinched tighter around the rim of the skirt, but she didn’t put it down. Her eyes was so open and unflinching, he can see himself on the horse back living in it, then they filled up with something wet, tears simply rolled down her cheek in little rivers. It hit him again, he saw her wearing that vivid red skirt in her running self, smiling the uninhabited smile he had felt on his own face before, with the whirlwind of cherry blossom dancing beside her, and she run to him and he help her up his horse back , she tightened her hold on his waist and with laughter asked “where are we going?!”. It hit him again, wave up on waves of feelings hit up on him he can hardly breathe. It hit him again that she had made herself lost before she was found, he had lost her before he met her, that woman laughing behind him is looking at him with tears running down her face not moving an inch, when he hadn’t even grasped the joy of finding her yet. He didn’t know how he felt about it all.
A movement caught his eyes, it was a young boy playing with some wooden toy near her feet, how could he miss that? Like he missed the color of the skirt, the urgency of his travel, he missed her son playing near her feet. And at that moment he felt satisfaction envision this was the enemy line and her husband was on the other side.
She was still looking at him, unmoving, time, space, everything stopped. He knew this should not be what it meant to be, he doesn’t need to know anything else but that empty space in her eyes, looking at him, filling it with his own silhouette, he doesn’t have to know anything else to know he can stay in there, he can show a young boy what it means to be a strong man, he can help her plan cheery trees instead shaking his head feeling she was wasting her time… he know all these, yet when he tighten his hold on the reins he can’t step forward… that horse hooves run so forcefully towards swords, weapons, enemies felt so foreign in a yard full of dancing pedals, silence, peace. His hand, so capably strong, was not made to reach into small villages of no name and no significance but every reason he needed to protect. He stayed in that silence, and felt something run down his cheeks too…
He turned his horse, moved as slowly as he had ever moved on a horse back, so if a single needle dropped, he would hear it, is she has whispered for him to stop, even as softly as a single cheery petal falling to the grass, he would hear it… but no sound came…none. His horse walked forward unconcernly, suddenly he couldn’t bear it anymore, he just need to get out there…and he left.
He left that small village of no name and importance, yet it become a reference point on every map he looked at, if he went to the west, how far it was to make a pass to it if he can, if he went east, it gave him such relief of the trip simply because it’s on his way and there is no need to plan in his head how to manage passing there… He made through that village few more times, he made sure it was in the night, and he never stopped, it was a blur of flickering candle lights from the window, or total darkness. He doesn’t know what it all means in his life as a man who moves forward, but he felt a sense of purpose he can’t really name. He live with the acceptance of not be able to grow old, but he lived with every single breath as if he will. If he grew old, he may see a young man chapping firewood in the yard looking at him with envy and yearning for adventure as he have seen on faces of other eager young man… he try not to imagine that woman again, somehow he knew if he was never far from that nameless village in nowhere, he would not miss it if running steps someday would be heard behind his horse back…
Would it be spring again? With cherry blossoms? And maybe she would wear her red skirt, she would look vibrant in it, it’s a picture he felt at peace to imagine now, it at one time it must have been as red as the blood that’s seeping out of him. He doesn’t know if he felt regret to have passed that village that fateful day, that fateful day had bought him heart aches, disappointment, emptiness, anger in his private moment. But from that day forward, he had felt invincible on the battle field, he had known why he stood between the enemy and the innocent before, and the knowledge of that yard of petals belonging to the path of the innocence, he had felt like a mountain before anyone can pass him and rape it… and he had felt such sense of satisfaction when it stood unmoving. He had felt such satisfaction even as he lay dying that it will know another peaceful winter, another blooming spring. Then he knew that fateful day had gave him something he can’t imagine, it had gave him something he would never know if he hadn’t passed it…as he lay, took his last breath, become free to be anywhere he wishes to be, he saw himself living in the silhouette of horse and man in the eyes of a woman busing in her small yard of cherry petals dancing, he felt peace.
“… he had known why he stood between the enemy and the innocent…”
The story of my life.
An insidious disease of mind festering and projected itself at the world, or at me, is the worst kind of enemy you could ever conceive. That insidious creature is a chameleon sociopath slithering through the world in a human body, born with cold-blooded poison.
She or he is a reptile, or fish, in disguise of being a human, who feeds itself insatiably on the unawares of anybody, as it is a troll through society. These are parasites I must slay every day JoJo. Being loved is one thing… being obsessed over is the most sickening truth you don’t want to know. This paradigm has stagnated and deceived my past growth, in past lives, in this physical life.
The cowardice of their infiltration, actually believes in a connection which is not there. A formless being, starving for meaning. Yes… it literally believes it’s psychotic need to feed on it’s lies into existence. Even though what it thinks it’s feeds on does not truly exist.
Truth is foreign to a reptile. So is listening. And love, even more alien. That is precisely why that reptile needs to drain you. Such self-serving thirsts to drink you. Void of conscience. The cold desire is to devour the goodness of your divinity.
The people who I care about through my life will be protected from such a maggot. Eagle’s can’t digest such poison…. be he sure as hell can spit them out.;)
You are not really being fair. JoJo had her own obsession over a man, which took her to this journey. Mine happened to be you, but I can see that obsession is not love. It is something I have to deal with on my own. I may have misunderstood a lot of things, but this is how we learn. I have to ask MYSELF, not you or your opinions of me, whether what I know is true or not.
You talk to someone about me, and it is not fair. It is not fair to try and elicit a response, as you know I would, because some of the things you say are not true, and I know it with absolute certainty. It shouldn’t matter to me, but it does, as everything is raw and exposed… I asked you once to ignore, I do not exist, but you cannot let it go, can you… why, ask yourself why you have this need… why you rope me back in every time, like you always have done…. If we truly do not want anything from a person – we walk away in silence. So I am asking you to stop making ‘an example’ of me and walk away. You know how it is done. Without looking back.
I have a choice to make. I have made it now. I will not retaliate. I will not respond anymore. I will not ALLOW myself to feel hate for you, no matter how hard you try to make me. I HAVE felt it for you, this toxic emotion so alien to me that it made me sick. Even in the throes of my divorce I never felt hate. And you want me to learn now? I have. I don’t like it, I don’t want it, it is not ME.
That’s all I have to say to you.
JoJo,
I don’t know why you are being dragged again and again into this. When I thought of why, it occurred to me that maybe you felt I interfered with your relating, but I honestly didn’t see it when I placed any of my comments. I didn’t realise there was some kind of a ‘queue’. If that offended you – I am truly sorry. I respect your journey immensely, and you have a gift of transcribing the most delicate of our inner states. Something I will never learn I guess.
Be well.
And another thing… what you are doing now is beyond the merits of love and compassion… Someone has to die for another to live. While you are making ‘the kill’ – you kill something, and it is not me. Look around. Discussing this ‘reptile’ with another is void of dignity. Void of being a man. Void of the truth. Like a woman in need of bringing her pain to another, and they will console each other by slagging off the bastard. What is the difference, really? Intent? What IS your intent in having said what you have said? Look around.
Out and over.
“Thus the proceeding subjective Scorpion assault to re-gain ego dominance. If Scorpios could only see their own ego during war… they might learn something about themselves.” PP
Couldn’t help it, looks very fitting to the passage:)
Since I have a very good memory, I keep remembering all the contradictory bits, hundreds of them. All good fun.
Maybe ‘mother’ wasn’t the best thing to say… that didn’t even occur to me…. what happened to that tact… far from the surface then? If that’s the reason you flipped – I am truly sorry.
What kind of manipulator am I if everyone can see that? A very lousy one.. That’s the reason why I was so calm… because in my heart I know it’s not true. I have a need to share my perception of relationship dynamics, and it stems from my own insecurities, perhaps looking for a confirmation that what I see and feel is real, because I so often distrust my perceptions… Of course it is not realised consciously, and no one can confirm anything to me, because it is my reality, and mine alone. Two universes clash when their perceptions are out of sync.
I had to push for the climax, because as I said ‘I learn to love only through the pain of loving another’… giggles and harmless fun do not do it for me… No, it’s not martyrdom of self persecution, because there is no feeling sorry for myself. I also realise that I have always done it in the past, except… wrong lessons were learned. None in your outburst hurt me, it just told me I need to look outside of the interaction, because this is where the answers truly are. Stop immersing self in others, and immerse self in – me.
That’s the best thing you’ve done for me in months. The rest is up to me. I work through my pain and my insecurities – alone. I cannot place anything in public domain… Must be the Water thing. And not now especially, for obvious reasons.
I truly wish you everything the best under the Sun and beyond.
Good intentions lead to Hell… there is deep wisdom behind this saying. Every intent has a REASON behind it, a reason flushed out from the deep recesses of one’s soul, Covered by layers and layers of ‘pretend’ intents.. The Fish does not ask what the intent is. She asks – what is the REASON for that intent. WHY the intent? What causes the intent to be in the first place? Because if I have no reason to engage – I will have no intent for ANYTHING. I have an intent to take a bath. The reason for this intent is – Because I am dirty. BUT. That does not end there. Do I REALLY FEEL dirty? Or do I believe that taking a bath twice a week makes me clean? Which one of those two is the real reason for me taking that bath?
Anyone can manufacture intent, as has been spoken about again and again.. No one can fake reasons, as reasons manifest through unconscious ACTS. Hence, if my reason for taking a bath twice a week is THE TRUE ONE – it will manifest as taking a bath TWICE A WEEK. I f my reason for taking a bath is FEELING DIRTY – I will take a bath WHEN I FEEL DIRTY. I will still intentionally take a bath, but observable behaviour is different.
The Fish sees the reasons behind the intent.. she observes. The deep recesses governing the choice of the soul which no one wants to question… Words of love mean nothing to her, they are transient, and she knows that some time down the line those words of love may become hate or disgust. Intent means nothing to her, if she cannot see the reasons behind. She has no way of conveying what she sees though. She simply dies as an exhibit for all to see.
Here they are, those screwed up people we all know and see every day of our lives… they are US, we are THEM, we strive not to be OF them in our conscious awareness… but in every person there is at least one atom that once was part of Ramses II…. every person is connected to another through Universal Consciousness, from generation to generation, right or wrong, those lessons passed over to us from birth – we ARE connected… Do I TRULY have a choice to discriminate between loving this one over that one? How do I DO that? Based on what criteria? Who is messed up more? Who is more of a lizard, and who is more of an Eagle? Who is WORTHY of my love? Those who love me more? And if they hate me – do I love? And if they misunderstand me – do I love? If we all love Eagles only – who is going to love the lizard? Who is going to show the lizard that it, too, can love? And HOW do I love?
Her Fish love is not that of an Eagle. She doesn’t select those worthy. The Fish DOES NOT select. It does not segregate between the ‘innocent’ and the ‘evil.’ We ARE INNOCENT AND EVIL.. It is acceptance, not transformation of another.. and the Fish wants to be true to HERSELF.
In her fish consciousness dies belief in a man’s intent. In his universal love for all. In his capacity to feel another. In his intrinsic understanding and ability to foresee events. In his ability to truly relate to and accept another’s vision.
With that Divine Consciousness in her – the Fish dies.
Scorpionic energy is not selective…actually, people are selective towards it, and then try to twist it in a way that “fits” them.
If you had known death, even if obtained from a man, you would not be implying that scorpionic love is selective and only chooses the worthy. I mean, death comes to us all, right? Even the biggest “sinners”. lol..that is alot more compassionate than your idea of piscean love. Death comes even to those who hate them….
Selection is actually a fearful chioce….so yes, there are a lot of pisceans who do select, more so than scorpio, because they have the tendancy to be fearful and insecure. I don´t know what superhuman you have painted up for all of the pisceans who are literally willing to loose their fins and “die” but it is again sounding like a bunch of hoo ha.
Intentions are actually manifested depending on your level of awareness. Many times, we don´t know our true intentions…they unfold as we begin to know ourselves. The manufacturing comes from ego and ignorance and the truth comes from our soul. You have chosen to act i.e. manifest through “obsession”.
Intentions from a person who has surrendered to the cosmos will be a whole lot “AWARE” than the intentions of someone who feels that they are manufactured.
That is your myth, Ines…based on not knowing yourself…and dying in the mists of the divine consciousness obtained from the 1,2,3, list of characteristics that you have supplied, created from “obsession”.
Divine consciousness, like objectivity, means only stagnation and more bullshit, without understanding first what love is.
With regards to intentions…
A person who is aware, will understand the idea of deception based on the “not arriving to your soul”. Meaning, as we begin to unravel ourselves, we leave ample room for the other to deceive themselves and feel an incredible understanding for these occurances.
The idea of grace and dignity, is based on how we handle these uncertain abysses. There is no right or wrong here, because anyone who has been through it, knows the difficulties and has gone through the unconditional love and sacrifice abyssess too. LoL. I have been told I am too proud but in my case, I can not manifest on something not resonating in my soul.
That is why scorpionic energy has the incredible capacity to be more compassionate than the crap you have been rationalizing based on the fact that scorpio is willing to loose their ego for divine consciousness.
Potentially, their all or nothing love for a person (not flow in the mists) due to their psychic capacity TO FEEL a person, makes them seek Divine consciousness and they are willing to kill their egos for it.
Scorpionic energy is incredibly healing and self sustaining, based on phoenix energy. This is complete surrender because believe me, it is bloody painful. Sacrifice is the ultimate piscean act of love, I understand, but death is not the true indication of love and sacrifice.
This energy rises to heal you, where other souls would have committed suicide. Piscean energy would just lie there and “die”. Phoenix energy will let you die, and then resurrect you, and heal you through firing your “WILL” and allowing this fire to HEAL your soul.
Pisceans don´t seem to understand “WILL” it seems. But many have no friggin idea about the true nature of sacrifice, karma and love.
It won´t be rational….
I am powerless to revive hope in a creature that is alien to themselves, the messed-up social dynamics/truth of this world, and me. I will not share what I have found in the treasures of my life to someone who swims in an ocean of deceit and lies. Human boundaries are such a fundamental sociological perception. This being fundamental, to those who aren’t socially obtuse and ignorant.
Breathing consciously out of the water, half-happy people interrelating with each other don’t assume the Atlantic Ocean and Pacific Ocean’s are truly definitive of a centered persons ‘inner boundary’. It doesn’t take an Einstein to trivialize this basic human distinction. But trivializing the intent of a bath?… Now Einstein is crying in his grave.
Discrimination among people and of ones inner conviction/motivation, is A FILTER for one to help see the universe beyond ego attachments to form, one who can hear and feel the totality OF BEING through a transcendent lens which is founded on pillars of Truth in the heart. Eagles can’t always transform the world around them. There’s millions of iguana or hyena on the ground, or a school of fish that were not designed ‘to grow upward’ (closer to the maker) by the almighty.
Choice’s are limited in the nature of the iguana on the ground. Thus it’s nature to feed and take without conscience. The fishes overwhelmed by it’s dream-state dimensions flooding it’s subconscious, are a macrocosm of of a different extreme. Without the ability to knit the microcosms of form (Virgo) into the macrocosm of the infinite, or God (Pisces) together… the servitude of the virgin-fish nature is meaningless and painful as it has not found discerned a meaning discovered in the Underworld (Scorpio).
Which simply means if one dies a true death, they truly understand the virtue, the salvation of suffering and death of-self. As opposed to the superficial mortal ‘reactions’ of inconsequential events by living blindly among the dead in human attachment. As they too are dead in life. And most certainly attached to the known. The dead patterns of mortal perception were not designed for heart and soul re-birth.
In the movie 300… a simple example of this fate is given. The deformed man who was deformed at birth, came to the male Scorpio King asking him if he could fight the Persians as his father did. The male Scorpio lovingly “refused to accept him” for his desire to kill the enemy of soulless drones. The male Scorpio discriminated the truth of what was… not what could be, in this deformed man’s specific fate. So as the story unfolded… the deformed man “sold his soul” through mortal perception (the idea of happiness gained only in material seduction) and so he worshiped the feet of a mortal despot, who controlled the weaknesses of that man… as opposed to loving him as an equal.
So the highest of beings among us who can see through the lie must discern who in totality they allow into their hearts to fight the cause and grow together. Because LIFE ISN’T FAIR. This world is corrupt (another symbol shown in 300 and Braveheart). People are weak and afraid.. they’re messed up beyond love.
So consciously including our soul and loving someone WHO IS INCAPABLE OF A TRUE ILLUSORY DEATH RESURRECTION… is denying the spiritual purpose of remaining true and one with God. Allowing our spiritual development to be ravaged by fear and insidious ground level material answers, trivial perceptions, is going backwards, separating us… away form the Source.
… The deformed man’s plight eventually betrayed the male Scorpio mission, or his ‘war’, to slay all creatures who were not of divine consciousness. The deformed man gave the cowardly despot information about “the old goat path” … which ended the male Scorpio warrior mission. That is why the male Scorpio, before knowing the end of his physical life… looked into the deformed man’s eyes, and said… “may you live forever”.
Male Scorpio of this level, knew the deceptions and disease of thought manifested in this deformed man.
This level of perception is no different than what I see in the plight of men and women through my life. So much of their plight is out of my control.
Only a female Scorpio would ‘think’ she has control of the world. Hahaha..
When in truth, ego control is the disease she is fearful of losing.
A true death is really ordained for Warriors of the heart. Crusaders of truth. Regardless of sign.
In contrast, mortal warriors who defend the ego are simply too fearful to die. What a delightful paradox;)
“Only a female Scorpio would ‘think’ she has control of the world.”
The ultimate abyss of duality and its illusions. Living with no control of anything – is a different kind of obsession. Every moment feels like you will have no other chance to “do it right” or “end this war” .
Many Scorpionic women feel that they can control the world through their unevolved darkness. Like these extremes of emotion are drugs that satisfy hunger, as it provides very tangilble results and almost immediate gratification in her physical world.
Whereas a person who evolves themselves, will know that only more illusion will be the result of these lies.
The Scorpionic king in 300 understood true sacrifice. lol…or rather, there is no such thing, in his mind and soul. The perspective is WAY different.
A martyr is an illusion for this reason – a word created by the fearful and the cowardly but not FELT at all by the person doin´the “dirty work”…
Dear Pluto,
… we are powerless to put into souls elements that’s not there, to put into unconsciousness the light of understanding… but we try, to the content of one’s own unique soul…felt via karma of our deeds, without that effort, it’s ourselves that can’t find closure to our own acts and deeds…and that unrest can be felt in the vibration of the air…war must be fought… relating, bonding then would be a dance of the present, instead to the ghostly tone of the past… but whose war?
Souls are made to dance together via their wavelength and signature, we bump into each other, cross path in mortality, share moments of immortality… but sustainability cannot be achieved without essence in our soul that truly bonds together that would withstand frictions and time and noises. Moments are beautiful, no matter with whom, where is happened… it meant to be gifts of joy, it only turns to pain when we can’t treasure its beauty and let it be… letting go, a painful thing to learn but in the end would teach us to take joy as it’s given, and not turn it into something that haunt us, pain us… it is our attachment to these moments that bring us pain. Cherry blossoms are an eternal beauty plastic flowers lives forever in a living room cannot comprehend. Letting go, fish, eagle, ocean creatures, creatures of any kind, there is a peace live in existing without a life form to attach too… but it’s not to be asked of souls that are not made that way… except understand one another… understand to ocean storms are peace, but to the sky, there are forever layers of it that are above what happens in the lightning and thunder… and not felt pained by it…we do not exist to bring each other pain, but to fill the Cosmo with balance and diversity… we are different… what does it mean? In love and relating to that difference?
Love,
jojo
Dear Pluto,
I’ve been living in the tsunami of seeing the world via the eyes of the watery energy… it made me understand so many things I was blind to… I have felt the inability to live with a void(emotional) is a weakness of character, as I have seen so much mortal pain was driven by that inability. And had felt betrayed when people of the water nature cannot live in the world of that void, I had felt that need of “connection (of emotional nature rather than limited to relationship nature)” is a lack of self-mastery. As in this world we may not always be “available”, via our own need of space, or uncontrollable circumstances, and if one lacks that self mastery, I see it as lacking a common ground of “trust”. I have even gone so far as felt the need of emotional involvement(shown or not shown outwardly) at all moments a “security blanket” the water energy being share in common, and when times are tough, emotions are negative, the need for that “security blanket” is predominate, commonly act out in seeking conformity and comfort from sources available and engaging… simply… involvement… of some sort, with someone…
I have seen these via my detached eye… yet seeing, without meaning, without soulful understanding, without willingness to love, with connection to our felt soul center, means nothing.
Via what I witness here of the language of the water, what’s exchanged, related… I understood, survival means very different thing to water energy as it does to me… that the need to that emotional involvement is food to a different soul… withholding it through willful detachment or unawareness… is a cruelty born from blindness… and I have done worse than that in the past… I made people feel “wrong” being who they are… when they lack the perceptive language to speak for themselves, I made people feel inadequate for being their nature state… to this I’m truly sorry… this is also why it so vital to understand and accept our true being, not influenced by any outside force, no matter how strong and convincing it seemed… be yourself, find yourself, love yourself, all the rest matters less.
To me survival means the need of space, freedom…as by my nature I fall into moments of trance where my energy and focus could be totally absorbed by something, a project, a life experience, a soul journey. During which I could be completely obvious to people who may need that constant connection to feel nourished… to me (may be unique to my own energy), my connection and love toward a person do not attach only to form… I feel the same way, as freshly as the moment I left them when I return to them. In the past I had female friends in the water nature feel neglected when I failed to constantly feed that connection, it’s hard to be the one constantly making the effort to connect and not feel rejected. And when that friendship fall apart she again felt pained when I accept her choice and not making an effort to make it “work”… to me…with or without emotional attachments, I’m connect to everyone I meet, I see life, death, their state of being, anything and everything happened in a dynamic before it’s conceived… conceiving it is but an act to make what already happened into physical form…emotional attachment when it happens is a love that’s not depending on the nourishment of constant feeding, but rather how deep we connect when it does happen…I accept her choice of needing something she feel she cannot get from me, and did not feel my love for her diminish, I love her “being” as a friend, not her choices… if she walk back in my life tomorrow, I will love her the same.
With relationship dynamics…it’s different, I feel every moment as intensely as moments are, I feel love and everything about loving someone… I don’t feel a need to constantly connect to that energy when I’m in the state of trust and bonding, as if I’m filled with love, with a broad smile I can take off and fly…unlike the continuation of “water”, the “air” of me can exist in separated particles… that doesn’t mean I love any less. That my tears, joy, tenderness are any less intensely felt and giving… I only feel that need to “attach” “obsesses” when I feel insecure of a dynamic. And insecure dynamics cannot bond my soul… as the conscious soul of anyone, it seeks freedom from enslavements.
It’s hard for me to get in depth with this tsunami of understandings… one I’m still in its waves, two the delicacy of caring for the feelings of the ones I love… but eventually I would like to walk it and share it.
Love,
jojo
p.s.
The silence of past couple of days is my attempt to protect the warrior who tries to protect me by not making myself a target, and protecting him by not having his sanctuary of feelings further exposed and violated.
JJOJO,
You know why I respect Gatubela?
She is inclusive
She makes sure people KNOW something is addressed to them
She DOESN’T READ between the lines
She is DETACHED in her views
She is OBJECTIVE
Your Scorpionic energy is at full force there. … I FEEL IT totally. concealed intentions… hiding the TRUE reasons….double meanings… a slow dance of entrapment, hahaha… Only another Water can feel that. The thing is… from the moment you posted your first comment here after coming back – I knew your confession of love was coming up, although it wasn’t of any significance to me. I also know, after having read your comments in the past – that love of yours was there from way back. Hmmmm… why was I the only one who at least had guts to say it from the start?
OK. Say this, JoJo…
Inessology, I hate your guts
Eagle, can you see just HOW MUCH I love you?
I realize that I will never trust a Scorpio. The ambivalence of their being clashes with my direct ways of expressing things. They say what they do not mean, and they mean what they never say… I don’t want to read between the lines, life is too short for games like that. So what is my true intent here? My intent here is to let you know that I prefer people to be direct. And that I see when they are INDERECT. That being indirect is dishonest.
I KNOW what I feel through this cyber space. No one can change that. I feel each one of the people very acutely. I know how this projects in their real lives. I know that the person with true integrity is – Gatubela. She can slam me all she wants, this knowledge of her makes me TRUST her reasons and intentions, because I know in my heart that hers are PURE AND GENUINE. Never, in all of our communication, have I felt that she had any ulterior motives, other that help me understand, and share her own reality. For that I thank you, Gatubela.
I failed to say it relates to your lat passage, not to the rest of your comment.
And I realize that it may sound mean, but I say what I see. Hahaha… people lie to themselves and to others even in an ‘enlightenment’ state. Which means what exactly? They are NOT in that state. Not really.
I had a difficult conversation with my mum. I said I will not lie to anyone, including herself. I then said about the reasons why I do not want to call her at times. I said I know nothing about her as a human being, and I want to know. And many other things. She couldn’t accept it. And that’s the reality of it. People, even those close – do not ACCEPT.
“I realize that I will never trust a Scorpio. The ambivalence of their being clashes with my direct ways of expressing things. They say what they do not mean, and they mean what they never say”
I must say though that the Eagle I know… this doesn’t apply to him. He manages the housing. He NEVER was ambivalent. He NEVER lied. He NEVER took. He was and is a true specimen of that PURE energy, projected subconsciously, because of who he is. He hasn’t got a clue about all the things spiritual, astrological etc.etc. he just cannot fail to manifest his true nature, through the way he lives his life. And that, my good people, IS TRULY BEAUTIFUL. THAT I respect immensely.
And he knows this ‘reptile’ hahah!!! in real life, that’s why he respects this reptile beyond declarations of love.
Right, I talked too much.
Wellllll…..being indirect is not a bad thing – not always. I don´t know why it is so hard to put somethings into words. We can only try and sometimes, we fail dismally.
Intensity is hard to express…because it seems that you will loose control all at once. Its too much for the brain centers when all of this flood of intense feelings arrives there.
So, you detach and use the other more calmer energies of your nature, to communicate.
“I don’t feel a need to constantly connect to that energy when I’m in the state of trust and bonding, as if I’m filled with love, with a broad smile I can take off and fly…”
Oh dear JoJo, how much you deceive yourself and others…. Since the beginning of September, there were only three days when you didn’t write ‘Dear Pluto’, with some story. that’s fifteen days of constant desire to connect….Or what is it exactly? I have a name for it. Do YOU?
And that’s why I said ‘Good luck with ‘enveloping’… Cassandra…. and hey people… lies are lies, regardless of who is the perpetrator – the enlightened one or not. At least I admitted to my state.
Shock shock horror horror… Ness, where is the love in that?
I don’t love lies.
Gatubela,
I will not talk in terms of energies, because words in describing intangible concepts are alien to me. I will tell you how the Piscean NON SELECTION works in real life.
I have a neighbour, a woman in her sixties who always struck me as incredibly negative. Every time we bump into one another I knew she would say something incredibly unappreciative about the world, her life, other people etc. etc. At first I thought ‘Something is going on in her life that is making her so NOW’ Then I realised – she IS like that. She has been that bitter person for most of her life.
What do I do? Do I WITHDRAW from any communication, run the other way when I see her? I felt…. NO. She is human, and whatever made her that way – she can at least be shown there is another way…
So I talk to her. When she says something negative I say ‘Yes, but have you looked at it this way?’ She gets puzzled and says ‘Oh may be’… I smile when she condemns the world and she smiles back… I ask her to go for a coffee with me, and we have a long chat, and things were revealed… I give her something to read, something on spirituality. I am aware that she is not going to grasp all of it, she is a simple woman, but I have to give her a chance…it goes on and on…
A year passed…. she doesn’t complain to me. She sees me and tells me happily (!) about her latest event… she calls and says ‘Would you like to go hiking in the Mountains for a day’. We talk, she is a pleasure. She is not a complicated person. She is a happier person now, she says it so herself’. I tell her than ‘You used to be very negative. You’ve changed.’ She answers ‘I’ve noticed too. Thank you.’
I live in a beautiful historic 19th century building which, by some stroke of luck has become – social housing. People here are VERY SIMPLE. When I moved in – ten flats were at war. Nobody spoke to each other. Now they say to me ‘People talk. They help one another. You brought them together’ I am not trying to blow a trumpet here, but these are concrete examples of my love.
That is manifestation of Piscean love to me. Through ACCEPTANCE of those who do not love themselves…yet. Who are nasty, violent, deceitful, who will try to put you down at any cost. Yes, I will die – WITH THEM. I will change them through – my death. Because I will go INTO THEIR WORLD. I dwell there and I understand it. But I do not become – of them. Then… change takes place.
So, in contrast to your statement of “if you had known death, even if obtained from a man, you would not be implying that scorpionic love is selective and only chooses the worthy”
Here….
“So consciously including our soul and loving someone WHO IS INCAPABLE OF A TRUE ILLUSORY DEATH RESURRECTION… is denying the spiritual purpose of remaining true and one with God”
I include my soul. There is no contradiction there. One has to become ONE with another, to UNDERSTAND their pain and their frustrations first. You have to WALK IN THEIR SHOES. THAT IS GOD, to me. All inclusive.
These are the true, genuine things form my life personally. It is personal, and this is how I perceive the world. I don’t TALK energies in a beautiful language, I FEEL energies tangibly, in real life.
That’s me. And that’s any other out there. We are connected. That’s how I’ve always felt it, even without any knowledge of spiritual matters. I will not change THAT.
For a Piscean to use any examples of their goodness is extremely uncomfortable, as it reminds us of the fact that energies blend in BOTH dark and light, and we do not feel the split most of the time. When talking about light, as I did just now – it reminds me of the dark. Hence, the discomfort. It’s OK, I have grown inside to the point where I can handle any amount of discomfort in life. I have learned how to turn discomfort into a constructive SOLUTION.
Be well, dear Gatubela.
“So consciously including our soul and loving someone WHO IS INCAPABLE OF A TRUE ILLUSORY DEATH RESURRECTION… is denying the spiritual purpose of remaining true and one with God”
No, not at all. Not in my experiences.
Just ask “Jesus”….
well…. it was not me who said that, hey….
“hate”? that’s what you perceive?…what a hideous pair of eyes… I don’t wast my energy on people I dislike, I don’t “look” at them, and I let them be… I have found peace in that discernment. My intention and focus is on people I do love and care, and what noises in their life mean and bring to their being, which I care deeply, are just that, faceless noises.
If we don’t seek to stretch what we already believed, perceived, known in various degrees of unconsciousness…what are we all here for anyways? yet it take a pair of hideous eyes to put that hideous Spain on love, care, and sharing in that seeking of stretching of our being… and bond and trust hasn’t built to the degree that we do not worry hideousness do not infect its disease onto the heart of the one we love.
hate or dislike… the meaning (negativity of it) is the same, isn’t it. Why not say it directly, instead of hiding behind an ambiguity of expression? Thanks for the admission. At last, instead of inderect, faceless remarks….
If you don’t waste your energy on people you dislike… why reply? You spoke to your soul, and you feel absolutely at peace with it on the matter, right? Why do you feel compelled to answer? People’s ACTIONS ALWAYS contradict their TRUE reasons/intentions – if they lie. Always. Hahaha!!!
Actually, JoJo… we are BOTH right. It’s just that you fail to see it. It’s OK., baby. I never hated you or even disliked you, there is nothing in you to dislike. You just love… selectively. That is who you are. I accept.
Hideous, hahah!!! The language reminds me of someone….you have been successfully cloned;) By all means, love. Stretch. Share. Bond.
Enjoy.
“I don’t wast my energy on people I dislike, I don’t “look” at them, and I let them be… I have found peace in that discernment. My intention and focus is on people I do love and care, and what noises in their life mean and bring to their being, which I care deeply, are just that, faceless noises.”
“When I was with the Butcher and his friends, we ask the mob: how can you call it true compassion when you are only able to cry for the poor, but unable to cry for the rich?”
yes, hideous, that sick excitement just get its smelly tentacles onto someone, get s response to feed that gaping emptiness, the difference between dislike and hate is the first you wash that slim off of you and be done with it, the second is it actually gets the chance to stick on your soul.
I did not respond to YOU, I respond to what your hideous disease actually seek to infect, the heart of people I love. a deed you are incapable of understand or perceive. and as your “normal” tactic of hideousness, to use the love and care between two person to infect your disease. Of course I love selectively, only the delusional mind believes she loves her attacker as she loves her child, loves her boss like loves her mother, loves a stranger on the street as she loves her mate. what a delusional mess.
previously I chose not to brush you off as I do today not because I really give a damn of your disease, but the fact I feel the unrest in the soul of the one I love. I feel it when he hasn’t found peace in his deeds… then I need to eliminate the noise of “me” to give him the space and understanding to find that closure. just simply love him…I understand my experience with you is not his experience with you, if you are this hideous when you do relate, what does it say about his choice in relating? so he does feel responsibility of his “seed” as manifested in you.
and as I have said my piece, I’m going to wash off that slim on me and find my silence with you. and hope the heart of the people I love understand my take on things.
“then I need to eliminate the noise of “me” to give him the space and understanding to find that closure.”
“so he does feel responsibility of his “seed” as manifested in you.”
Huh? A bloody paradox. I seem to be out to lunch here….
also… in true Cassandra style I could tell you how your relating is going to progress, because I know the two people involved – from within, and where you be in, say, three months… . except, this is the problem of Cassandra… if she tells people – they either do not accept this as valid, or subconsciously attempt to change their behaviour, to avert the prediction… but hey…
Boy, I really need to shut up. It’s one of those days when things are clear and transparent to the point of visions. And it is not fair on others to hog the place. Apologies.
“So, you detach and use the other more calmer energies of your nature, to communicate.”
Which is what I am truly doing now, Gatubela.
I truly do not feel any contention, or hate or dislike for anyone of you. You all are great people, battling in your own way with yourselves and this world at large. Each has their own way of perceiving the world. Their own way of battling. Their own way of working with the soul. Truly, any intense response just draws out the true nature of a person and their level of evolution, to me. Which teaches me about the Truth of who they are. Not the words themselves, as I said words are trolls… Any kind of ‘insult’ is really insignificant for me now, as I do not feel those. Why? I feel only the true reasons behind. Hidden. So why on Earth do they not see this simple fact – is beyond me. Boil. Sure. If one does not care – one does not boil. Why then say one does not care? Why LIE? Why say ‘I am not talking to you, I am talking to others’ and yet… talk to me? And why, for Heaven’s sake, get yourselves DRAWN into this, instead of asking a genuine question, or calmly walking away? It fascinates me now, it really does. The DISCREPANCY between actions and writings….
We are at different levels of evolution. Some of it is completely INCOMPREHENSIBLE to people outside of the seeking circle. To give an example.. a long time ago Gatubela said to me ‘You haven’t done any soul work, Ines’… At the time – she may as well have said it in Eskimo, I had no idea what she meant.
The truth is born within that moment of communication between two or more people. There is no contradiction between my perception of love and the Eagle’s, or Gatubela’s or JoJo’s etc etc, all there is the expression of its multifaceted sides. Love has facets. Inclusivity. Acceptance. Transformation. Integrity. Honour. Compassion. Love is not a single meaning word, it is not a noun, no. It truly is a verb, and all those facets manifest in a person who loves. So we clash as one of us talks about the elephant’s ear, while another talks about its tusks, and yet another – about its tail. Yes, damn it, to the one who thinks tangible examples do not apply – they bloody do, if it helps to convey the MEANING of what is being said. So the bath example, the elephant example – I am talking to the real people, not just with those who live in an elevated state.
Anyway… Mercury Rising discerns through… thoughts…. which arrived to her via…. Piscean perceptions. Now I am feeding these thoughts BACK to my feeling state, to check them against my bodily reactions. Does it feel right? Do I lie somewhere? And it says to me… you write because you want to understand. Writing helps you to place things in perspective. You write because you feel misunderstood, and it is important to you because your 7th House Piscean Sun learns through the Other.. it is also important because you want a bridge, not a bottomless trench, oh there are so many bottomless trenches between people in this world… their beliefs, values, culture, geography, schooling, education, socio-economic status…. Why do you want a bridge? Because THIS IS THE EXPRESSION OF YOUR TRUE NATURE. In that same way Scorpios demolish and rebuild selves and others – you build bridges. I feel it so much now, because I said it way back, but it was something instinctive. Here it looks like I am demolishing too. But hey guys…. look around… I come in, and conversation revives, and it becomes heated, and things MOVE ON. And people get to know each other, and only through knowing another can we build bridges.. See?
So I ask self – do you write because you want to hurt? Because you feel slighted? Because you feel a need to retaliate? No, with the hand on my heart, no. All I feel now is – compassion… the more I write the more I feel it…. strange… But I also have to accept that others – walk away in indifference, or dislike, or non acceptance. Your way is not their way, but it is what it is. Let others be as they are.
Gatubela… there is one question I genuinely want to ask you, since you have such good understanding of Plutonic energies…. My Pluto is in… the First House of Personality. How do you feel that would manifest? If you drop everything you know about me… what would it do to a person?
I don´t really know too much about astrology. I really don´t feel that it would be the right thing to do to answer your question with a link either.
Well….no, bridges are not built through knowing eachother. Not in my experiences.
Being connected to all the divine…can only be balanced by the reality of duty. It is not ego that we should be making our chioces to survive, but what we know we can manifest in truth in love, without causing more “karma”.
We all have our soul tasks to do during our stay here on earth. Which is why you can never ask a person to deviate from it.
“Of course I love selectively, only the delusional mind believes she loves her attacker as she loves her child, loves her boss like loves her mother, loves a stranger on the street as she loves her mate. what a delusional mess.”
Now… here is my brand of love… when my son was six he once came home from playing outside, very distraught, not telling me what happened. I got a call from a neighbour who saw what happened. She said he hit a little girl on the face and ran off. I went to ask him to tell me, and he refused at first. Then he burst out crying and said they were playing ‘catch’ and she caught him running, and he just turned and slapped her, and then he realized what he had done, and got scared and ran off. I said ‘It was not intentional, but she doesn’t know that. You do know what you have to do, don’t you?’ He started shouting and saying he is not going anywhere. I said ‘ I will give you fifteen minutes to decide. You have a decision to make. Your decision will depend on how much you respect yourself.’
…we went to her house, and he was crying all the way… he was crying when her father opened the door, and he was crying when he apologised to her… we left, and he said to me he hated me… he wouldn’t talk for an hour after… then he came in, hugged me and said ‘I love you’ He NEVER forgot that, and never forgot the FEAR he had to beat.
I will not let him get away with being inhuman, being a coward, unable to face the consequences… I will not let him get away with being someone else, and boy is he now manifesting it… he knows that. His Piscean and massively Scorpionic natures appreciate the level of detachment we have… where he is able to be himself as much as a seventeen year old can be… This is my love. It stems from acceptance of him as an imperfect human being FIRST, and then – my son. He is part of all, not just part of me. I love him.
I will die for him if necessary. That is the difference between universal love and personal love, for me. Letting others be. Letting my son to be the best he can be. Delusional?
so there.. the language is nothing. The deeds are everything.
I have said enough, truly. Be well, all.
“Delusional?”
Wellllllll….yeah!!!
The second last paragraph was a whole contradiction.
Not really.
Universal love is my acceptance of him as an imperfect human being. So I let him make mistakes. I do not impose my way of life and my beliefs on him. Detachment. Personal love is teaching him to see and face the consequences of those mistakes. Not because he is afraid of loosing my respect. Because he will loose his own. I am a conductor of that understanding exactly because it is PERSONAL and it is my duty as a mother. So he manifests his being without the fear of me WITHDRAWING my love if he chooses his own way. It is a very delicate balance.
Selective in terms of what JoJo was saying is that you won´t love your son, the same way you love your mom, or a man…or your enemy.
We differ in our feeling of selective, but anyways, I just wanted to attempt to share that with you.
For me, selective means that i must be able to clearly SEE or FEEL. I mean, my soulmate might be right in front of my nose, but if I do not have the right energetic sensitivities, I won´t recognize him at all. So, for me, I have to work on myself, in order to me to chemically REACT.
When this happens, a woman does not accept any more seeds. Only ONE man can do this chemical reaction in her.
He becomes her light…and only then can she surrender her ego. LoL…and not a damn moment before.
Gatubela,
-) Do you respect this person?
-) Does your conversation and interaction mean something to you?
-) Does accepting bait from a psychopath who is proving her obsessions with me in writing… but pretending to be otherwise… interest you?
-) Does my intent elude you? Tell me.
JoJo,
-) What does your relating experience mean with this person?
-) Do you respect this person?
-) Loving me as you openly have from the start is nothing to defend. Real love and communicating is not a crime. The only reason you have shown me love and others here too, is because I have given that love back in truckloads. If my intent eludes you, tell me?
My Center:
– When a person I will not trust constantly proves those mistrustful manifestations in my innate perceptions, I do not associate with them. Period.
– So if I cannot find in any way to trust a person…. I do not respect them.
– So if I do not respect the person involved… even though I have given the best of me and tried, I do not associate with them. I leave.
– Offering integrity and love to that purpose, from my core values becomes a pure lie to me… if I pretend that love is intended so people can approve of me.
Everyone is their own person. The question is, who exactly is pretending to be someone they’re not?
If I am the person who is not direct of who I am, then please continue your interactions and ignore me;) Honestly.
These questions help me understand you and me and the present.
Psychopath? I lived with a psychopath for many years….maybe we have a perception problem as talking to her may not be the same as you FEELING her. She is not threatening to kill me, she is not hurting me, nor enslaving me, nor raping me, nor torturing me. She is not making me watch while hurting or interrogating my children. She is not the devil incarnate, as was my exhusband. Your perceptions may be extremely astute than mine in what would be an unknown to me at this moment in my interaction with her.
I don´t feel what you feel. Perhaps I should. Most likely you are absolutely correct. But what does that mean to me? I am not you. And your intent does not have to be mine. and her intent towards me, is probably alot different than hers to you.
Respect is earned…
Ok;)
“But what does that mean to me? I am not you.”
To answer your question:
She has never genuinely cared for you. She has intentionally slipped in words of praise to you, and others involved, as we were expressing healthy exchanges between each other. She had known your spirited quality to enjoy compliments and praise, and that you would accept those ‘words’ at face value. Her compliments to each of us are selective from a very dark strata of her mind. Love has never been the essence of that mind. Her sickness is actually conscious to her. Deliberate.
So In her contrived dialogue to feel accepted and approved through our mutually positive feelings, she exploited whatever we as a group of individuals sincerely expressed between each other in that given context, for one reason only— It was to drive an unsettling, doubtful wedge between us. That was her goal from the start. It has worked.
All of this doesn’t matter now anyway. Your choices are what’s best for you, as my choice to move on is best for me. I have had a clear perceptual understanding of her mental health since her first post manifest. I have known her psychological underworld, as I know yours, as I know every person who writes on here. I always use social discretion until someone brings that dark upon me.
If the real nature in her context, her desire to feel loved, were sincere, I would know she is being honest with herself. If that were the case, I’d honestly have nothing to expose in her underworld. I cannot escape my latent darkness. It is who I am. If that were really the present, we would all get along and care for each other by being genuine, regardless of negative energy.
If she were sincere and actually cared for you, I would not bother answering your question right now in this post. I was hoping you would understand the false relationship she has manipulated just to gain our acceptance. I would accept absolutely anyone, with love as their basis no matter how crazy they are. Her ego doesn’t want to die. There is a missing person in there. It is actually infatuated with something distant from the idea of being happy or feeling happy…as we have all seen.
When I read words, I don’t read literal words on a page like everyone else does. I read… the manner and context in which that person’s psychological nature is coming from. The actual person… as opposed to their ‘opinions’ is what matters to me. When I read the condition of her (their) mind, I have to be discerning for my own mental stability. If I know people, during intimacy, better than they’ll ever know themselves… you may understand why I am, the way I am.
The underworld (hidden) evident through a male mind, is also the underworld evident through a female mind. It is a realm I know intimately from the examination I discovered in all my relationships. I understand it’s latent role in the mind both in man or woman. The subconscious is hidden. But it exists. We have seen what it does right here.
All the best to you and your kids Gatubela;)
“When I read words, I don’t read literal words on a page like everyone else does. I read… the manner and context in which that person’s psychological nature is coming from.”
So do I 😀 my dear Mirror.
“That was her goal from the start.”
You flatter me really. Imagine having such a massive master plan ten months ago… Some super brain I must have…
Here is the prediction for you… You will take time talking to people off line…sure… you will observe if I am active on here… but you know… you need more than ONE WOMAN to love you… you need to EXPRESS yourself… you need ADMIRATION… the pull to come back will be strong.
Come back when you feel you can. Or stay away if you feel you can’t. It’s OK. Really. I will miss you as will others.
We met for a reason, darling
Oh….I don´t feel that you know my underworld….not in its entirety. And I would not place my underworld on anyone. That is not your burden to feel, but my own. I am able to heal myself very quickly when the darkness comes.
That was not important in my chioce to share with you and the forum. What I felt, I wrote, and all of them based on my experiences. If I don´t experience it, then I am a phoney writing cheap philosophy.
I don´t have weaknesses to compliments…. and my intent seems to be a mystery to you. But again, that is between me and God. I stand alone on my judgement days…
What is eternal, can never be broken P.Puppy. So, that chioce is not made by words. If you knew my soul, you would not say such things.
Ines….Yes….everything is a chioce. Every moment is a test. Everything is a moment to fall and to rise. Don´t thank me for my integrity. Helping and sharing comes from my soul.
“I cannot escape my latent darkness. It is who I am. If that were really the present, we would all get along and care for each other by being genuine, regardless of negative energy.”
Here… this is the only sincere, genuine thing you have said.You MEANT IT. From your heart.
It really IS the present. And we CAN get along. Do you not TRUST that people here truly care for you and ARE genuine? Me, Gatubela, JoJo., Mari, Umm and many others? Regardless of your negative energy? TRULY TRUST that others accept you as you are? They LOVE you for being different. For the existence of your violent inner world. For your brilliant intellect. For your unorthodox approach. Women have been here BECAUSE you inspired them. If you got carried away… it happens, many examples in history.
Be a bigger man. You ARE loved. You ARE respected. You ARE admired. Accept that. ACCEPT THAT, damn it, you silly son of b*****. Beyond words. Truly feel it. From every person here – FEEL IT. This love is not about coping with your dominance and always saying ‘Yes, Sir’… . It is about… letting you be the best you can. Simple.
Gatubela…. everything is a rise and a fall. Yes, every second I have a choice to pull myself down, or rise above it.. and love.
I understood x
Gatubela,
Your subconscious is not the issue here. It never has. You have missed my very simple revelation.;)
Enjoy your relating. I hope it gives you clarity;)
My time has expired here. Thanks to all women who fought with me. I hope you’re smiling. I’ll read this blog, but there is nothing more I need to write.
Cheers.;)
No, I did not miss your revelation….I am not you. I am a woman, not a man.
Take care….I do hope you find your eaglette.
Sorry, Gatubela, I may have misunderstood…
Selective love… we do love people differently, but what I am trying to say is that for me personally, behind all of that is my understanding of their ultimate humanity. So FROM THAT PERSPECTIVE – people are all equal for me. I guess it may be explained better in terms of ‘worthy’ or ‘unworthy’. All are worthy, it’s just that I resonate with some people more, so the selection takes place based on that. But all are still worthy, equal. Does that make sense?
I will give you an example… it is hard though. Stalin had a son who was, during the war, captured by the Germans. They wanted to negotiate for his life, of course. Stalin refused. He said ‘Treat him as any other prisoner of war’. For me this is a scary choice, and I know I would have chosen my son.. BUT. On a universal level I understand his choice. Everybody is absolutely equal in the face of this Universe… We are rarely subjected to such life and death decisions (I know you were), but this is humbling.
When you say ‘He becomes her light…and only then can she surrender her ego. LoL…and not a damn moment before’… surrender to man through surrendering to love within…. and if the man never comes… does she remain in a loveless state? Huh?
Either way… I have to know if it feels true within me… and I haven’t felt it in my life, that truth. I was blind. It would be better to say I haven’t felt my soul WHILE looking at a man. All I felt was insecurities…. that is so clear I cannot help but laugh at this… iguana? LOL The strange thing is… it is gone. I’m sure it will attempt to drag me back, but awareness is bliss. Only one mental call away.
Dear Pluto
-) What does your relating experience mean with this person?
I sense a person’s authenticity from the beginning of contact, I stay away from people who gives me the wrong vibes. When I perceive the real inner change and growth of a person, my sense toward them changes too, otherwise they continue to give me the wrong vibes and I continue to stay away from them. In this case it means nothing; nothing real has ever been perceived.
-) Do you respect this person?
No, I don’t respect anyone who lives in self-deceit, and manifest that self-deceit toward others, twist truth to suit their own agendas.
-) Loving me as you openly have from the start is nothing to defend. Real love and communicating is not a crime. The only reason you have shown me love and others here too, is because I have given that love back in truckloads. If my intent eludes you, tell me?
I don’t feel the need to defend my open love, otherwise it wouldn’t have been open love in the first place. I feel I need to learn to trust your clarity of perceived/felt truth and not be controlled by my own habitual tendency to presume and react to my own presumption. I do feel your ample love given to me and given to others here. I feel your intent clearly because it can be clearly perceived if I have any self-honesty to perceive it.
* I do not love or intent to love in capacities of compassion toward said person, nor do I feel you should, yet that decision is yours to make, I have act to remove myself from becoming an obstacle of your freedom of choice due to the honor of your intent called for, but again, I see I have act upon that presumption and reaction of presumption again. I see now that’s where most miscommunication happens… via presumption. I will learn to ask questions instead of presume.
* In my growth I have learned when intent can be clearly perceived, then it is clearly given. Only a deceitful mind ignores what can be perceived clearly. And an honest/direct man stretches his consciousness whenever unaware knowledge enters his perceived/felt truth, and he act upon that truth with bravery in clarity and openness.
JoJo thanks for having the guts to answer my questions. You’re a treasure. My soul consciousness will be forever with you no matter what;)
If you’d like to talk about stuff away from this site, the door is always open.;)
“And an honest/direct man stretches his consciousness whenever unaware knowledge enters his perceived/felt truth, and he act upon that truth with bravery in clarity and openness.”
“I am always thankful to God and will give back to the universe in my own way for allowing me to know you.”
“I’m humbled to be in the presence of the true eagle, free from the entanglement of past memories. How magnificent it flies ”
“you are open to truth, recognize Joy and freedom and humanity when it comes into your consciousness…”
Baekdu Mountain reaches across
To shape our beautiful land.
Cheers resound all over the land
Hailing our dear General.
He’s the leader of the people,
Carrying forward the Sun’s cause.
Long live, long live, General Kim Jong-il!
All blossoms on this earth
Tell of his love, broad and warm.
Blue East and West Seas sing
His exploits in their song.
He’s the artist of great joy,
Glorifying Juche’s paradise.
Long live, long live, General Kim Jong-il!
The Socialist cause he defends
With iron will and courage.
He raises national honour
Far and wide throughout the world.
He is the champion of justice,
Standing for independence.
Long live, long live, General Kim Jong-il!
😀
It is really strange… while I realise how and when the Scorpio (male) surrender takes place… I do not feel this in me… my capacity to tell a man about his greatness is limited and is not verbal… there are many other ways to express it….. However… another strange thing is… I feel a lot of love for JoJo right now. The split in her between her love for the man which makes her lose that essential independent part and become a tad manipulative… ( I am a woman in love,, and I’ll do anything to get you into my world and hold you within… remember Barbara Streisand?) but also… her underlying innocence and desire for the skies to be always blue…
Sorry, guys, my Virgo discerns and gives my Pisces tools to see a bigger picture. But my primordial gut reactions are always way ahead of Virgin analysis…
Right now I feel… in a state of wonder… there is no other way to describe it. A state of child like wonder at the world and what I am observing, and what understandings come up.
And the darkness falls away. What is my intent? It is a bit tongue in cheek here. See things for what they are, but ACCEPT HUMANNESS in others. Let them be as they are. We are all alike.
I was out all day, but I wrote this before I left, on the name of my son:
“Hmmm… sounds like an ultimatum to me. JoJo will do as you say. She is completely and blindly under your control now…. Gatubela has her own mind, nobody can MAKE her do anything, except her own inner self.”
Then I came back and found some interactions. The truth of those interactions is frightening, and IS what I battled against…. I don’t know if people can feel and see it…
I opted out of personal correspondence (yes, I did, damn it), because the more we interacted, the more the truth crumbled and fell to pieces. The connection was, is and will be – of FEELING the man for who he is.. the states, the moods, the reactions, the actions, the real REASONS behind those actions. Four Fishes and a Neptune Scorpio must be giving me the edge… I am made of the same psychological stuff. Please do not assume that the KNOWLEDGE shared on his part is a lie. Not at all. I am talking about HOW that knowledge is manifested by the man himself in his interactions with women here… contrast between theory and practice… calls for ‘loyalty’, subtle manipulations… even in my ignorant state back then I said ‘Quit manipulating me’ in my six answers… If I was a truly wise woman and wanted to keep this relating at any cost – I would have kept my knowledge to myself. But how can a Scorpio man ALLOW anyone to see their insides? Wanting to kill, huh… my ex did threaten to kill when I wanted to leave. Otherwise men usually want to protect me… So I must have grown as a woman at last.
In many ways the self righteousness and infallibility was confirmed again and again when women came and went, unable to handle the intensity… I could handle it. I grew while handling it, too. I have stepped inside the man’s soul, and what I saw was, in essence – polarised. Into the darkest, scarily airless, vacuum like space, the purple shade of crazy… and the brightest, afterlife like light… and they do not seem to converge… it is hard to explain… it’s like they are separated and can only be one or another, manifesting through very definitive situations… This is why I found the behaviour so predictable.
I am a woman. I want to remain one, I don’t want to grow a cock…. But oh what I read in that answer from JoJo was so painful, a RAG DOLL reply, it gave me goose bumps… Am I the only one to feel it like that? When I meet a man whose soul speaks to me – I will surrender myself totally and with no expectations… Except one – his soul has to carry on speaking to me. And that includes my freedom to say ‘no’. Otherwise, surrender becomes a road to abuse. One can love – and have a voice – through listening and expressing one’s inner truth.
Obsession… My Piscean soul kills them, as it cannot be bound to anything which is prison. The Ocean freedom of movement. It was fuelled by an illusory belief in his integrity. Another illusion was that I believed he could actually feel me. He can’t. He perceives fragments in each interaction, but fails to put them together. Don’t see the wood for the trees. So… I listened to my soul. It said ‘You cannot carry on, when the lies are present.’ And the obsession began to fade. It will be gone soon enough.
… “-) Do you respect this person?”
Wasn’t I told by you that:
“O really? He had “the deepest respect for you” huh?… well, a Relative “notion” to those who manipulate the integrity of each interaction, who leech off of others energy because they lack empowerment within themselves, and those who need, yes need… the applause and glorification for control of a social dynamic.”
What is your notion of respect? WHICH ONE IS THE TRUE YOU?
I will not let you lie to me. I said it to you personally. And I will not let you lie to others. I am saying this to you now. Run, as you always do. Boo.
What do I feel now? Shocked by the DEPTH of submission required by the man… the totality of it… Also… compassion for the man, for the afflictions of personalty battling within his soul and mind. Sad, for it is bloody hard to be him.
Gatubela… thank you for your integrity..
I just feel that a person of integrity wouldn’t have put other people in a position where they are supposed to ‘make a choice’ of “my enemies should be your enemies…. even if they did nothing to you.”… a very Scorpionic notion of ‘loyalty’.
This Forum is not about forming cliques. It is about expressing and sharing what people feel and see, irrespective of how others may feel about it. No?
Ladies… there ARE Scorpio men who are Eagles and whose manifestations are true and genuine. I am lucky to know one like that. They are as rare as gold dust. If you have one – treasure him. Truly.
This previous post is 100% off the mark Ines. And somethings just can´t be allowed to be said, and distorted, without a bit of senseless and non-clarifying relating on my part. LoL….
P.Puppy did no such thing. And although this is a public forum, any resolution will only come from me and him. There is no beauty in your comments and assumptions. Your comments only serve to stimulate more and more …..nothing.
“Only a deceitful mind ignores what can be perceived clearly. ”
For me, a deceitful mind is not able to see the objectivity of the “not choosing”…and surrendering to higher energies. Clear Perception is not linear…it is multidimensional. The mind is not deceitful…it is extremely submissive to those certain energies…such as the empty comments you have placed in your previous post.
Deceit is not the only obstacle to “clear perception”…Getting rid of deceit (dualistic and only half of the transformation spectrum) will not all of a sudden open the dimensions for you and make you see the TRUTH. Scorpio knows respect…but the real work is done on the levels of TRANSFORMATION. So…deceit goes to enlightenment through energy perhaps through releasing attachment. The mind will always be deceitful…and we can always fall into its traps.
A clear mind, has the ability to transform and is agile and mutable. A clear soul will transform a man´s soul consciousness as well.
His reasons for saying what he said are sincere. I am able to feel that at least. If I considered him to be such a meanie as you indicate, then I would never have INITIALLY felt the freedom to say what I did. His way of interacting with me, permitted that. Which is the EXACT opposite of what you have written. That Freedom is handed over, through vulnerability and not ego, on a very hidden and subconscious level….and I felt that. I don´t fully understand what happened afterwards, but some things can not be rationalized through empty words.
Yeah, it sounds like I am mincing on words…or exaggerating – but I do know the sensation of having true enemies. I did not feel such a thing with his comments or his desire to leave.
“there ARE Scorpio men who are Eagles and whose manifestations are true and genuine.”
An eagle´s manifestations are on an INTANGIBLE level…
So…if he stands for Freedom, all the people who cross his path will feel it. If he stands for Love…then people will feel that too.
What the F***k people do with that freedom or that love, is on their soul.
Je ne dors plus
Je suis folle.
Je m’abandonne
(I can’t sleep anymore
I am crazy
I am letting myself go)
Je ne dors plus
Je suis a toi
(I can’t sleep anymore
I’m yours)
In reverse mode
In nomine Christi, Amen
In nomine Christi, Amen
In nomine Christi, Amen
In nomine Christi, Amen
In nomine Christi, Amen
In nomine Christi, Amen
(In the name of Christ, So be it)
(In the name of Christ, So be it)
(In the name of Christ, So be it)
(In the name of Christ, So be it)
(In the name of Christ, So be it)
(In the name of Christ, So be it)
The eternal flame will always burn
Feel, understand, and learn
Gatubela… I am really crap at expressing feelings in words. I want to cry, but no tears come… So….
“What is eternal can never be broken”
You said once that we can never really leave… I so understand it now.
LoL….this video was posted, because I felt it represented something very important that women should know about scorpionic women….if evolved.
The women in this video are warriors…(ok…maybe they are a bit sexy!!!) It talks about the very intangible energy that is VERY tangible for scorpio. Meaning, it can cut like a knife.
No…it was not about women cavorting with bad guys….although perhaps the temptation to see it that way might stimulate a mind or two.
Specifically, “she” does not take his darkness and bastardize it….actually, she walks through it as if it does not affect her. Do these women look “afflicted” with the darkness that they are surrounded by? Do they “rationalize” what he stands for? What she does feel, is her own sexuality.
Nope…no material things here…hahaha!
Walking through those plutonic gates, does not affect the pure of heart.
Actually, I am crying now… you just opened something in me… fuck it. I held it within for the last two days, because I really really thought I will be alone forever… here, out there, everywhere… and you let me know that people CAN connect beyond the tangible… and love IS all encompassing… who am I? Just some woman on the other side of the world, and you extend your hand to me, and it is SO SELFLESS…not because I gave you love first, but because you BELIEVED IN ME. In the last few months, as much as I knew within myself my own inner truth… we ARE human, we DO feel alone when no one can see and feel what we can… so I am crying and feeling again.. I was so dead.
THANK YOU.
not believed in me… you felt the truth of what I was seeing, for you it resonated because of how it was unraveling before us. I did say ‘Others will unravel’, remember? This ability of mine to foresee things is really tiring, a cross… because I can foresee and I can do absolutely nothing about it.
Ego Versus Personality
Somehow I feel these two are separate… From JoJo’s responses I have seen that her Ego is still there, in full force, together with the need to defend self and label and humiliate another. Slime…huh? Maybe my understanding of this is a bit off, and please do correct me if so… but I can say from what I have learned… labelling another comes from feeling threatened in some way. We subconsciously look for a pigeon hole to place the person into, to isolate them in our own mind from what we believe – WE ARE NOT… such as ‘He is just a garbage collector’ = He is NOT intelligent, he cannot be by virtue of his occupation… which means I AM INTELLIGENT. Because I am a doctor. Putdowns work as a boost to who we believe we are. Putdowns are what we believe we are not. A belief based on an INSECURE perception of own…. self worth. And desire to assert it – THROUGH EGO. People who are aware of their own self worth and BELIEVE IN IT – do not label or indulge in putting others down. These are the people who killed their egos. Can you see just HOW I feel and read between the lines to a person’s REAL STATE OF BEING? It’s eeaasy…
“I feel I need to learn to trust your clarity of perceived/felt truth”
How about…. to trust your OWN? Like so…
“I feel I need to learn to trust my clarity of perceived/felt truth”
Remember how I, too, asked ‘Can I trust his perceptions?’ way back… I used to be one of those. Oh us, blind women… Do we not merge with the soul of another based on our own perceived truth of who they are? Do we not do this when their truth, as perceived by us, RESONATES WITHIN US? NOT when we blindly learn to trust ‘their clarity’?
Anyway… Loss of Personality. A no entity, listless, robotic reply which gives the person on the other end – WHAT THEY WANT TO HEAR. People in that state of personality loss believe their idols unequivocally… or, as that passage shows… they feel the need to ‘teach’ themselves to believe… That is TRULY scary to me. I am Russian by origin. I know the price of personality loss. When Stalin died – people cried. Despite each knowing at least one person who disappeared into the night. Despite a sense of fear everybody lived in. OH, but they would say ‘He/She must have done something wrong’…. They didn’t question. Their personalities were wiped out.
So in that way the man was right, ladies… I ALWAYS question. Read between the lines. See beyond his words. Check his ACTIONS towards me and others. You may then face what I faced – a clash and bang. But it will be HONEST. And if you are afraid that this will loose you the man – it is a lie between you. And you will see if your man lives by what he says. Then.. make a decision. Is that the man for you?
So I guess… my personality is alive and always will be, my Pluto makes damn sure of that. There is something my son said to me a few weeks ego (we do discuss all this stuff). He said ‘You have no idea that you have a powerful effect on people’ I was shocked. I always FELT INSIDE a small and insignificant being. A little powerless thing. I have an effect!!??? I reflected on that. On things that happened in the last ten years… I do. That was a revelation. Now I realised that all I had to do – bring my outer manifestations of Self in line with my inner sense of self worth. Balance, guys… oh how much I am learning… Thanks, man!!!
Death of Ego – fine. Death of Personality – NO. This is my original contribution to the matters of spiritual development, hey… BTW… on the subject of Originality…. Jesus, Mohhamed, Gautama, Frances of Assisi and thousands of others were originals. Or else among Christianity, Buddhism, Judaism, Hinduism and lots others the world would also have….. PLUTONISM:) That’s OK, it doesn’t devalue one’s knowledge and understanding just because someone prior already understood. So, my dear friend… expressing it a tornado style to all who want to hear – does not make it original. Just.. intense to the point of crazy.
I will one day put up a list of books that helped me to progress from a frightened woman, unsure of her place in this world – to someone who appreciates herself and others in all our manifested human/divine glory.
God, just read the latest… we so bloody similar in out way of thinking and feeling, just compare the posts!!!!
Eagle… you are still the Eagle. Let others be. You know in your heart that I never wanted acceptance from anyone. Battling with you and INTERACTING WITH Gatubela was not about acceptance. It was about the truth of who you are. Through that I learned about Me, i SAID IT BEFORE. You both gave me tools to find my way back to me. For that I am grateful beyond words. I owe you both for the rest of my life. And my gratitude is sincere.
People are able to make their own minds, without you, can you not see it? If anyone feels I am a fake, and I want something from them – they will hopefully tell me. Why do you believe that YOU ARE THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN FEEL THE TRUTH OF OTHERS? Why do you not let others decide for themselves?
OK. I will remain silent. I have to get all my will power together for that because you know that I have a need to share my perspectives with others. You said yourself ‘You desire a perceptive, communicative partner’ So it manifests here. But you are right. Silence is the best, at least for a while.
I know that you feel hurt now. And you were not before. I am sorry.
“I have had a clear perceptual understanding of her mental health since her first post manifest.”
You know.. I’ve been selected to train with the Samaritans. They absolutely do not allow people with any kind of mental instability to work for them, for obvious reasons. I can e-mail you the acceptance letter if you need proof of my mental health. Maybe that will change your clear perception.
Hmmm.. the ‘very simple revelation’. You are playing games, again. If there is something to say – say it. No one is as good at reading between the lines here as you are. Sometimes – what is not even there.
So.. you decided to ‘move on’, right? Just like that….. From the people who were called… a family? How much of a family was it? I guess I expressed it at a more mundane level ‘What kind of friendship is it if it falls at the first hurdle’. Do not fall into your old practices please… Do not burn bridges. Maybe the time off would be a good idea. And you have someone to converse with offline;)
Enjoy.
Time off.
Dear Bella,
I’ve decided to stay off the forum for the foreseeable future… I’m writing you to let you know that you are loved, no matter what negative energy have been exchanged between Pluto and you and me, we care and love each other. That is the point he was trying to tell you. that this is caring relating no matter what’s been said. He truly cares about you if you feel it, I believe you can feel it. I’m also writing to tell you my take on the situation, this is my take, I can’t speak for him, but my take is he is trying to protect you from what he perceive as ill intent… but also, from my view, I see a man who has been violated, his will, privacy, intent been violate without consent, it’s a vile feeling, no matter how strong he is. I feel this is like a person been raped and the people he cares for who should also care for him say to him: but I can’t feel your pain and anger….which is the feeling he won’t focus on instead he tries to protect you still… don’t you feel it? you understood the essence of the man so well… if the quest for truth render us unable to feel empathy for the innocent, unable to feel love when it’s given, what good is it for? No matter what, you are a free and individual spirit capable of making your own decisions, and we(I took the liberty to speak on behalf of Pluto as I see him as a man of intent rather than expression) love you.
” I hope you are smiling” … how it echos with “may you live forever”
love,
jojo
I have never accepted another person telling me , what a person feels. You are talking to a person who passed 15 years being violated and being left with nothing. So, it seems that you don´t know me either.
You can keep your love nest with him and whatever it is that you feel you are doing. I , on the other hand, will do my best to not need protecting, and learn to protect myself, as I have always done.
Let me fall…alone….and I will feel the truth. My faith, heart, mind, soul, is that imense.
OK, lady, keep calm, this is the police.
There is nowhere else to go.
You gonna slowly turn around
And put your hands on the floor.
Do you understand me?
………she doesn’t.
Gatubela…
Rape does not feel like violation… it feels like being hollowed out…
I am truly sorry.
Eagle,
Remember this…
“You express your love as desire to heal. You transform people. I express my love as desire to accept. I take people as is. But I learn from what’s beneath the surface. What I said resonated with you, and you REACTED. Your choice of intermittent Scorpionic mode reactions tells me INFINITELY MORE about the Truth of you than thousands of words you wrote on the Forum and here. I accept ALL THERE IS in you. But I want the Truth (choices) of who you are over the Illusion (words) of who you are. ”
And this…
“I could choose to worship you blindly like a Deity, like women did on the Forum, but I have my eyes open. And you won’t be knocked off the Pedestal because I chose not to place you there in the first place and see the totality of you instead. Isn’t it more real?”
I do not change my story to suit the circumstances…. This truth remains. I want to stand before myself and feel at peace knowing I was true.
You saw the honesty of it then. I hope, after the red mists subside, and you listen to your soul – you will see it again. I am not the one who is hurting you now. You are doing this to yourself.
Take care of yourself
Bye
omg! Just read all the recent posts…. 😦
Ines,
….I just feel that a person of integrity wouldn’t have put other people in a position where they are supposed to ‘make a choice’ of “my enemies should be your enemaies…. even if they did nothing to you.”… a very Scorpionic notion of ‘loyalty’……
I don’t feel that ppuppy see you as an enemy here. It was a loving act of him to not abuse your weakness perceived from your obsession. He was trying to release you from that because you are better than that but you don’t see it as an act of love. Maybe if you will start to feel that ppuppy and the women which you “THINK” are just BLIND WORSHIPERS are trying to help you based on love… maybe you will realize that you are part of the family.
…….Obsession… My Piscean soul kills them, as it cannot be bound to anything which is prison. The Ocean freedom of movement. It was fuelled by an illusory belief in his integrity. Another illusion was that I believed he could actually feel me. He can’t. He perceives fragments in each interaction, but fails to put them together. Don’t see the wood for the trees. So… I listened to my soul. It said ‘You cannot carry on, when the lies are present.’ And the obsession began to fade. It will be gone soon enough……..
Is your obsession gone?! Hmmm.. do you know the reason why you are obsessed?
Maybe this will help…
..…It really IS the present. And we CAN get along. Do you not TRUST that people here truly care for you and ARE genuine? Me, Gatubela, JoJo., Mari, Umm and many others? Regardless of your negative energy? TRULY TRUST that others accept you as you are?…..
You are seeking acceptance and approval.He had been very direct and honest to you that he does not trust your intentions and he does not feel that you truly love him and accept him for who he is. Why don’t you ACCEPT that first??? Love is not forced Ines. Once you learn to accept that maybe you will experience your DEATH #1.
Lol! It Made me laugh because your above statement contradicts to your latest statement below.
…..“I could choose to worship you blindly like a Deity, like women did on the Forum, but I have my eyes open. And you won’t be knocked off the Pedestal because I chose not to place you there in the first place and see the totality of you instead. Isn’t it more real?”………
hmmm.. so you are more Genuine? Competition still exist in you and you wonder why he can’t trust you?
Mari,
Mari,
“You are seeking acceptance and approval.” “maybe you will realize that you are part of the family.”
Well, I certainly have gone the wrong way about it, haven’t I? The God Farther has not signed the invitation….
I do not want to be part of any family. I am my own person, is it not obvious? Groups, any kind of group – are based on compliance and leadership.. . I do not lead, and I do not follow. Neither do I need a ticket into the group by way of ‘loving’ the group leader through total submission. Because if you cannot see the difference between Death of Ego and Total Submission wanted here… you are blind. There is a massive difference which I understood way back.
“It was a loving act of him to not abuse your weakness perceived from your obsession. He was trying to release you from that because you are better than that but you don’t see it as an act of love”
Hmmmm…. so you are saying he still loves me. Can you hear that, Eagle? When you take that shotgun out next time… I will take is as a wedding preparation, LOL
Listen… love cannot be forced. So I do not accept ANY KIND OF FORCE as a ‘loving act’. Isn’t it simple? The end does not justify the means. Character assassination is Not A LOVING ACT when the intent is to remove FREEDOM OF CHOICE via… coercion, of all things. I am not blind.
Look BEYOND words, Mari. I feel that you didn’t actually read anything in depth, just skimmed through it. Do me a favour…
Go back to post 1714…. look at the questions asked by the man… read the rest. REALLY READ EVERY SENTENCE. Feel the intent behind it. It is also addressed to you now, because you chose to write to me. Now… answer what is there in all honesty. Done? Now read JoJo’s reply. And can you answer….how did it make you FEEL?
If a man feels at liberty to TELL WOMEN ABOUT WHO THEY ARE, he should be able, by virtue of his own teachings – take that from others unflinchingly.
If a man claims to have managed to overcome the ambiguities of his Scorpionic nature, he should be able to handle mature honest communication, without senseless rage and name calling.
If a man says he is an EVOLVED Eagle he should be able to drop that Scorpio way of processing things ‘’You don’t need to tell me that. I know who I am. I need love and support, not telling me who I am. I am now hurt!”.
If the man wants a strong independent woman he should let her listen to HER clarity, not blindly accept HIS. Instead, he feels… violated. That famous Scorpio paradox – I can do this, but you cannot. Render onto Caesar… So who is that in front of me? There are plenty of unevolved Scorpio men who mirror, burn hot and cold, test etc.etc.. I really do not need this kind of shite from the one who laid claim to ‘Eagledom’.
Our truths have not resonated. I made a choice based on MY truth. In doing so I have gained the truth of my personal inner freedom. I did it despite of him, not due to him. Sometimes a woman just have to look a man in the eye and say ‘No’.
Uranus squares Pluto now. Enough of this discussion.
Ines
“I wonder if that difficulty of expression is something you also face.”
No… not at all… I am sociable and quite likable in real life but there’s always a part of me that needs to withdraw from the outside world. That social and expressive side does not activate instantly though, when am in a group of people I observe (virgo) and feel (pisces) get to know each one of them quietly and calmly (Taurus). When the bull is quiet it doesn’t mean she does not see you!
I do not know how is your relationship with your ex (Taurus/Pisces) what really triggers him to behave that way. My Taurus/Pisces psyche is very nurturing, empathizing like a sponge that can absorb and understand your pain when you are in deep trouble. A friend of 10 years told me that people likes you because they feel some kind of solace when they talk to you. They feel that they are not alone in their sufferings when they are with you. But the moment I sense that you just want to posses me like a commodity or use me for your own selfish reasons, I detach completely before I lose my very own vitality and individuality. I have Pisces between 6th and 7th house, my moon sits in the 6th house squaring URANUS. If still you don’t get my message that you need to help yourself and make your own decisions instead of obsessing how to cling on me… you’ll face my other moon… my dark moon (Lilith) in Aquarius. The obsession and needyness makes the person an easy victim for manipulation but I choose not to because that would deviate my very intention to help. I feel that our very purpose on earth is to help each other probably that is my virgo rising and cancer in the 11th house energy. It is the greediness and selfishness in people that pushes me to use my other moon… when you show kindness and higher love… they will smother every last part of you and posses you like a drug. Instead of reflecting at their own mirrors they would complain how COMPLICATED I am! SHE IS SO COMPLICATED! SHE IS SOO MEAN! …. What is wrong with her? I used to get affected in the past and wonder what is wrong with me too. Now that I have better understanding about people and my own energy I don’t give a damn to what they say in my heart I know that I am giving from the deepest part of my soul.
Mari.
“The obsession and needyness makes the person an easy victim for manipulation”
well… if you use this as an indicator, then I am certainly not obsessed. In fact, may be my obsessions are a bit different to others. Yes, I want to know all there is about the person, in the same way your Eagle learned stuff about you. Yes, I will follow them to the end of the world if I love. But I will not be dominated.
Like you I walked away from feeling the need for approval. What I said to the man and which you took as a sign of me wanting approval – was said from my heart, because I know exactly what he is feeling now. And there is no need for it.
Mari… I am not the same woman who posted her first comment here ten months ago. Things moved on.
My best to you.
PPuppy -It is sad to know that you have decided to stay off from writing. I do understand hugs. You have shared so much… your love and soul will always be here. We are still a family no matter what. I would continue to contact you offline if that is fine with you.
Jojo – Your journey and your stories have inspired me. My email is lovemarrie573@gmail.com if you wish to connect offline. Hugs~
Love,
Mari
In the name of fairness I also want to redress the balance a bit here…
It takes two to tango. I was impatient, wanting trust on a plate. I drowned both by writing loads of stuff. I ran towards the man. I didn’t want to change him. But I did want to be special. So he is right in saying that I was needy, a little girl wanting a cuddle… I have faced that truth in myself.
All of it was manifestation of my obsession. Why the obsession? Partly because there was a void which needed to be filled. The void from having felt the intensity of the energy which had become placid and indifferent… having been part of that ‘live force’… and no more. Remember I mentioned ‘drama queen’ syndrome in Pisceans? That need to feel alive, because the placidity of our nature disappears when we are emotionally engaged? Emotional engagement can be of any origin, but this is our moment of mortality.
Partly, because it is part of my inner nature, as Water. Deep waters.. a need to merge. It will always be part of me, but I now know that merging takes place based on a different energy.
So… it was then. What is now? Strangely, I feel much in control of that desire to fill the void. Or, rather, that I have a choice to do it by other means. Please do not tell me the void should not be there in the first place. Be realistic. I am not the Buddha and will not reach that state. I am human. Our emotional states, moods, even attitudes fluctuate from day to day. It is not about killing that human. It is about letting it live through all that without loss of balance.
OK. None of the above removes the fact of my truth. And here it is in essence. He perceived the truth in me as above. I perceived the truth of him as I wrote before. We both perceived a shady side of each other. The Underworld. Couldn’t reconcile it. Or… wouldn’t admit it to each other. Lies.
Beautiful. When the chips are down, all talk about loving people unconditionally goes into the bin….
So people delete their e-mail accounts… make blogs inclusive… invite certain people to contact them… Big divisions… just like in the real world out there.. Fascinating.
I don’t care. My e-mail now is nessregisterus@gmail.com
Inclusive.
Gatubela,…
I am worried about you. Let me know, either here or e-mail. One line will do.
Unconditional Love goes both ways or rather, in infinite ways….which means that everyone has their divine way of Love and feeling their universe.
Don´t be worried about me. My soul is in love.
Gatubela, thank you. That’s all I wanted to know.
My hard drive died… couldn’t handle the intensity I guess. Two days peering into the guts of my desktop and rearranging everything inside…
Last two weeks have moved me on again, with new insights and meanings filling every waking hour… Unconditional love… We treat life as a constant, expecting it to fall in line with our expectations of how it ‘should be’… and life is millions of variables, each a continium from black to white, cold to hot, cruel to kind, miserable to extatic, etc, and all shades of grey in between. Nurturing the soul can only be found in acceptance of this simple truth, in taking each variable as is and finding joy in it: loss of job and gain of a friend, new relationship and new breakup, tears and laughter, discontent, misery, smell of earth and smell of shit, raindrops, new places, feeling of wind on one’s face, child’s smile… everything has a meaning, if we choose to make it meaningful. Because everything is a lesson to be learned, everything within it contains the seeds of the highest highs and the lowest lows. That timeless moment between a minute ago and a minute from now on… If the soul is actively engaged – nothing is lost in the moment of experience. And so is with unconditional love… it, too, falls somewhere on the continium, and what is mine? What is yours? What is hers? What is his? It’s what is born between two people who unconsciously negotiate their variable conditions, in every day of being with one another… it is what becomes alive, with own meanings and own revelations and own rhythm, a living entity… and somewhere in between the two agree, sometimes unaware, that – there are no conditions. Why? Because unconditional love does not mean ‘no conditions’. It means love not bound to form, timeless and spaceless, happening in those moments of silent negotiation between the two souls.
This kind of love is one in a million.
Does male SOULFULNESS differ from female?
Why ask this… well, it bothered me that I never felt the man’s soulfulness. The soul, yes, but not the EXPRESSION OF HIS SOUL. How to explain this, it’s hard, huh…
Soulfulness – expression of deep feeling or emotion… meaning a soulful person emotionally invests themselves from their soul in whatever it is they are engaged in. why did I always feel LACK OF EMOTION in the man? Why did it feel like talking to someone who cannot express self in an emotional way, even when it was GIVEN TO HIM in that way? I mean.. who would say ‘you bring water to my eyes’… Water? Not tears? Why did it feel as if nothing TOUCHED him at a very deep level? I began to connect the dots. Complete emotional detachment from whatever the situation. In all my relating I felt his emotions on a couple of occasions ONLY. That’s why I said nothing hurt him. And nothing really made him truly happy either..
…of course I asked ‘why.. Whenever the interactions took place – the battles always gave him the feeling of being in charge.. No rejection. No betrayal. No loss. Those three which would have gotten him by the throat – never happened. Until… The Split. And THAT, folks, was painful, never mind all the winky faces. Why so? Because… it was taken as a PERSONAL betrayal. Not some bloody suffering of a woman he just reduced to rubble… No, we are talking about HIS PERSONAL SUFFERING. It changes everything… NOW we have emotion.
The reasons for such an utter divorce from own emotions are not for discussion here. He has a choice of being honest with himself and facing those in his solitude. When I think of it, it makes me cry and feel his pain which is buried so deep even he cannot admit it to himself… What he needs more than anything is release of that pain through love, and I only hope that one day it will be released, I truly do. His true dark nature adds every experience to the Black Book of Mistrust. When people expect something negative – they get that negativity, it’s the Law of Attraction. I too walk on the dark side, of self and others, at times. And I do feel the need to absolutely understand, through feeling and introspection and analysis. It does not mean I do not love.
I feel that female soulfulness is a personal FEELING of the pain of others, as in ‘I feel your pain’. It is emotive and engaged, looking to comfort and embrace. Male soulfulness is PERCEIVING the pain of others, as in ‘I see your pain’.. detached and observing, looking to throw you a tool. The expression of those is different, yet I did meet a man soulful in the way it felt… warm. Maybe it’s different in physical life… For me what I felt here from the person – wasn’t about soulfulness at all.
So the inability to express… JoJo said once it is not what’s been said that’s important but what’s been perceived… concured by the man. I feel the ‘disclaimer’ “only applies to Scorpio men” – should have been placed at the gate here:) Why… no one ever perceives anything in the same way. Ever. Give it to a hundred people, and you will get back a hundred interpretations. Especially with the way things are written here. When I am called a psychopath I am supposed to perceive the message of love in it…OK, it is a two step thing… The ACTUAL content behind the name calling was this “I feel frustrated because you wouldn’t admit your dark side to me. What else are you hiding? I don’t trust you”. To that I say “Ask me. Do not throw a wobbly, you are the one who dug me up. Ask me with love and care, and I will tell you ALL. I will tell you how I really feel about our interaction, and what makes me write to you, and why I asked for it, and the insecurities it brough up in me… ask me. You championed honest communication, didn’t you? And when I do tell you all those – do not throw another wobbly because some of it may not agree with your truth. Be fair. Ask again”. If it was just this one step only… the problem is that feelings of mistrust are then extrapolated into a very wide area. HOW, from a woman who wouldn’t admit my darker side to the man – I become a generalisation of a psychopath and all sorts, and not only that, but the attempts are made to convince others of that too? That, folks, is a Scorpio shadow…
A Scorpio man finds it near impossible to express what he feels. And he finds it impossible TO ASK DIRECTLY… YOU AS HIS WOMAN are expected to have an ability to perceive EXACTLY WHAT HE MEANT when he said something to you, even when it was contradictory to the actual
content. You are also expected to keep your understanding (if you have one) of his Underworld to yourself. To him what’s perceived from his words is more important. It’s a cry for understanding.. And what he perceives in others is more important too, because people say one thing, and mean another – just like himself. Yet, the shadow in him will deny this simple fact. This is the Scorpionic truth of relating. For me – it is different. It is not what was said by one and perceived by another, but what was meant by one. I give people the benefit of the doubt now… if another party misconstrued it by perceiving something else – it doesn’t make them a stupid person, and
it doesn’t make me a liar. Our perceptions can deceive, as we have seen from interactions here. For me perceptions are often beyond and above words. Negotiation of truth takes place in this shady area of talking to one another, each moment.
Of course reading through people into their Underworld makes relating to them harder. It will always feel like they conceal something from you… But people ARE vulnerable, ARE protective, ARE subconsciously afraid to appear weak.. No Scorpio Mars should ever intrude on their inner vulnerabilities UNLESS there is a total feeling of trust on both sides. Trust is not earned via ‘breaking and entering’, as we have learned. This forceful act felt instinctively an antithesis of love to me.. The feeling of being in an ‘experiment’, with no real emotional investment on his part, not just towards myself, but to others… cannot fool Water there. When it was made clear that all this interaction is – an EXAMPLE to others of how people behave in real life. Here…
“I have “intentionally mimicked” the manipulative games, fears, arguments, rebuttals, politicizing and planted/started comments by each person toward me specifically… yes intentionally adopted… which then brought out the consequential re-actions of futile conflict, non-loving exchanges (for both involved)— which in turn highlighted the Truth, Discernment and Distinctiveness of those specific “abusive” dysfunctional exchanges. The exchange of fear I was a part of– INTENTIONALLY.”
Trust is based on… soul to soul relating. Not on ‘intentionally mimicking, no matter the intent. Yes, maybe his intent changed from that point on. But I didn’t feel it. I didn’t feel the true soulful engagement. So my mistrust carried on within.. I can see it now. My vulnerabilities are mine to know. I will tell if asked with love and care ONLY. And my Underworld is a place where no one is invited. In the same way that the man does not invite others to his Underworld, and any attempt to enter is met with fierce reaction. Violation? Well.. he made himself available for interactions here because he felt secure in the knowledge that no one will analyse HIM for a change.. I feel that a few personal observations wouldn’t hurt in these circumstances.
And here it is… there was no soulful relating on either side. Deep seated mistrust from both.
I ask myself why I write. So much didn’t get expressed, lost in meaningless exchanges and bickering or simply ignored when asked. I will say stuff that needs to be said, that no one wanted to hear or know. It is true that people much prefer to stay within the limits of what is already digested by them. Anything challenging the status quo is rejected outright. My concern is to express what I understood, get it out into the open. And leave.
When the outside world operates on a different principle of concealed intentions – it is not MY RESPONSIBILITY. If others misconstrue through their false perceptions – it is not my responsibility, although I can help and explain it better. My responsibility is to be true to myself and mean what I say – every time. Nothing should be left open to guesswork, not between two people who have sincere desire to relate to each other. When sincerity is absent – it breeds mistrust through mistakes of misconceptions, misperceptions and double meanings.
Which took me to the subject of true Eagles… Mari said once her Eagle told her that it was untrue of him to tell her he loved her, when he realised he didn’t (at the time). HE TOLD HER ABOUT THE TRUE STATE OF HIS FEELINGS. How rare is that? The Eagle I know didn’t tell me verbally… in our mutual ability to communicate without words… he silently acknowledged the attraction, but also silently let me know that it cannot be. Without drama, which released both of us from the illusion. We saw The Notebook where the character directly spoke to the woman about the way he saw things between them. True Eagles speak up about THEIR STATES OF BEING AND FEELINGS, NOT THAT OF OTHERS. Can you see the difference? Not everything needs to be verbalized. But when it comes to the crush points, reactions from a supposedly evolved person instead of true communication – KILL TRUST. They make a woman question the validity of every claim he has ever made. What else is he NOT?
The defences go up and manifest when any direct questions are either met with reactions, or deflected. Even the simple ones “My question is, what would you have done if you were that young man? Will you go to her and confess of all his past mistakes?” JoJo asked that. There was no clear answer. ‘I am not afraid to hurt a woman’s feelings’ is not an answer, but a shallow negation which trailed off to a talk about self.
“I know myself deeply and where the dynamic is going when I express, and the damage it will naturally create in the bonding IF I DO NOT lead the direction of love through the bonding.”
Hmmm… can love be lead? Via battles, making up, getting to open up, getting to know one another, upsets and tears and laughter.. it is a complex and organic process. A man who takes it upon himself to be in charge of the dynamics – lives in the illusion of a general on a battlefield. There is NO DIRECTION in love, and no control of it. An independent woman who respects her individuality cannot be lead like a cattle into the pen. SHE creates conditions for the bonding, through being open to the possibility of love. A man is the Protector of Love, not its Source.. And true love is built on EQUALITY. People often assign literal values to the word – equal pay, equal jobs etc… NO. Equality means recognition and respect of another’s individuality (difference from self) and freedoms AS VALID AND IMPORTANT as yours.
Dominate (Scorpio), or worship the Goddess (Pisces). Nothing in between. And the conditions are mutually exclusive. An evolved Eagle may transcend those rigid limitations.. if he chooses to honestly recognize them in himself first. Not theorise them.
The above passage can also be taken as.. the man is aware of the damage he is able to inflict in any relationship through simply being who he is. And he has to be very careful as to how to express his true self. Which is self explanatory…. and sad. If we cannot BE our true selves with another – what is the relationship, but a fake? Being his true self destroys any possibility of true intimacy. I see and feel the tragedy of it:(
I look at myself and say ‘But you, too, were guilty of not expressing your true feelings and motivations’… Yes, I was. I expressed what was known to me in the best way I could. What was unknown – I didn’t see at the time. The difference is…………. I never claimed to be the Eagle.
On the sidelines… I now came to hate the word ‘bonding’. Go figure.
Spirituality as a tool for protecting self from….. own sensitivity?
These are quite difficult concepts to express, so bear with me…
“So consciously including our soul and loving someone WHO IS INCAPABLE OF A TRUE ILLUSORY DEATH RESURRECTION… is denying the spiritual purpose of remaining true and one with God. Allowing our spiritual development to be ravaged by fear and insidious ground level material answers, trivial perceptions, is going backwards, separating us… away form the Source.”
The contradictions inside that phrase…
So facing anyone who is ‘unevolved’, has fears and is basically representative of the majority of people out there… facing that lost person(s) is…. ‘separating away from the Source’, from God? What does a spiritual person do? Dwell in their beautiful spirituality, away from those ‘mortals’ who may pollute the Evolved with their meaningless existence? Is that what a truly Godly person does? If so… what is the purpose of spiritual development? To live for own satisfaction, looking down on those ‘mere mortals’, is that what it comes down to?
I feel this is contradictory to a spiritual message. ‘Remaining true and one with God’ is about connecting to the Source within us so that we could not only enrich our own lives, but also connect to others and enrich their lives as well. We do not separate ourselves from those who may be living in Darkness. To do so is betrayal of one’s soulfulness. THIS IS “going backwards, separating us… away form the Source.” It causes endless suffering, because some of those unevolved people could be our own kin.
One’s true faith protects a person’s spiritual development from being “ravaged by fear and insidious ground level material answers”. Why is
it an issue? How strong is one’s faith if encounters with those ‘unenlightened’ people ‘ravage’ it? I saw the explanation here:
“When I read the condition of her (their) mind, I have to be discerning for my own mental stability.”
Another person’s mind has such an effect on the man due to extreme sensitivities of his nature. His way of protecting self from the madness of the world out there is to build a drawbridge between own mind and that of others… through discernment of their intentions and a choice of letting the drawbridge down or not… Well… if it helps him to stay sane – it is his choice. It is not mine. Extreme sensitivities are difficult to live with, if PERCEIVED as a burden. I should know and I really feel for the man. BUT in the last few months I have discovered a secret… if I keep love as the basis of my relating even with the most challenging people… my sensitivities turn into a blessing. They give me ability to bypass their bullshit and go straight to the heart of the problem, without creating a battle. Maybe it’s a female thing…
The scary thing is that other trusting souls have subscribed to this wholeheartedly and without questioning. I mean… both Mari and JoJo
used to have own style of expression, own ideas and emotions.. All gone. Just compare:
“But the moment I sense that you just want to posses me like a commodity or use me for your own selfish reasons, I detach completely before I lose my very own vitality and individuality.”
“If still you don’t get my message that you need to help yourself and make your own decisions instead of obsessing how to cling on me… you’ll face my other moon… ”
“I stay away from people who gives me the wrong vibes. When I perceive the real inner change and growth of a person, my sense toward them
changes too, otherwise they continue to give me the wrong vibes and I continue to stay away from them. ”
“I only feel that need to “attach” “obsesses” when I feel insecure of a dynamic. And insecure dynamics cannot bond my soul… as the
conscious soul of anyone, it seeks freedom from enslavements.”
“I had felt that need of “connection (of emotional nature rather than limited to relationship nature)” is a lack of self-mastery.”
Nothing wrong with that if that’s how they truly are, huh… except.. this is not them talking. This is the man talking THROUGH them. I feel it, just cannot explain it really. Loss of own voice. Oh well… each to their own.
I’ve come across this small extract from Linda Goodman musings about Scorpio-Pisces relationship:
“With all this empathy, you’d think these two would have nary a problem area to their names. Unfortunately, this is not the case. Heaven
on Earth, although growing ever nearer, has not quite yet been established. The first problem in the relationship between Fish and the
Eagle is that of weakness and strength. Guess who usually wins that battle in the final inning – which is stronger, which is weaker?
Don’t be afraid to hazard a guess. You know enough about astrology now to be tested.
The Scorpio is stronger, the Piscean weaker? No, it’s the other way around. Maybe you didn’t notice the structure of the question, which included the phrase ‘in the final inning.’ Admittedly, Scorpio would seem at first to be the stronger of the two. They are both of the Water Element, and since water is the strongest of all the elements, for reasons I’ve told you elsewhere in this book, this means they both have the strength of endurance. In addition, Scorpio has all that Pluto power I’ve been writing about – or that you’ve read or heard about elsewhere. However, Pluto power is based, to a large extent, upon ego. Human ego. Neptune power (Neptune being the ruler of Pisces) is based upon a force no weapon in Heaven or on Earth, in any solar system, universe or galaxy, can conquer. It’s name is… humility. It has a great deal to do with ‘… many that are first shall be last; and (many that are) last shall be first.’ The message requires meditation.
On a human personality level, the Scorpion who starts out in a relationship with a Piscean believing that he or she can swallow this poor little Fish through the force of a stronger and more intense nature – is going to be surprised. You know how difficult it is to surprise a Scorpion. But it can be done. In a contest of wills or a contest of surprises, the Fish will spring the last surprise. And it will be a real shocker, quite unexpected.”
Many that are last shall be first… who is going to love the lizzard….
Humility… I didn’t use that Piscean ‘weapon’ in my relating here. There is something about Scorpio Mars that completely wiped that out, I learned that I do not respond well to brutality.. My Mars is in Pisces in the 8th house. Yet… in the end of it all I feel humble. I will always feel the connection to the man. Anything that was said – is nothing compared to the vastness of our Consciousness. It is so much bigger than any of us. It will continue to flow in and out in both of us – there were lessons to be learned for both. I am grateful. I ask us both not for forgiveness, for there is nothing to forgive. I ask us both – for understanding. And I don’t feel in any way stronger. I do feel… wiser. Because I know I am able to understand and accept another and love both darkness and light.
I now feel I am done. It’s time.
Eagle… as a consolation leaving present to you… this is what I wrote to myself one day before placing my caustic comment on the Forum. It was a way of leaving the correspondence which felt dead to me. This is what you never saw, because your detachment is so complete and absolute. If you could only ask… Not a word has been changed, it is how it was written. Enjoy. I am letting you have the last laugh. Humility.
04.08.12 Saturday
“I had a conversation with Anthony during which he refused to block some websites for me. I wanted a restricted access, and his conviction is that I should use my will power, not the artificial means. He is right. But I got so upset within, and when he left the room I cried, and thought why and realised the unpleasant truth…. he annoys the hell out of me at times, in the same way as Pluto does, and the reason is simple really… I have no CONTROL over either. That curt and bone dry manner of both (stupid Scorpionic powers) cuts to the chase and leaves no room for negotiation whatsoever. While me of course is all negotiation and compromise. They don’t. Ever.
So Pluto… I sent a mail after over a month of silence. He ignored it. And left a long response to someone on the Forum. This made me think real hard. How much affection do I feel for the guy if such a simple action (silence) makes me uneasy? What, in fact, DO I feel? Do I REALLY feel anything at all, or is it all the illusion? And what about that feeling of loss of control? And I am doubting self now… It manifests as a sour feeling in the bottom of my stomach pit… sitting there and telling me something is off, I need to address the issue now, before it sends me into a spiral of bad moods and loathing… And I am digging deeper for an answer… And I am listening to my true inner voice…. And I don’t like what I see or hear there. Because I lie to myself, and perhaps, to him too, unconsciously playing the game of ‘I’m not like others, because I can live and be without missing you, and not wanting to know how you are or what is happening. I am a toughy, and my demeanour is aloof, just the way you want it, and here, look…. I am so fucking contained, this container can withstand subzero temperatures and the fries up of hell…
A lie. First of all, it fluctuates. Day to day, hour to hour, and between those states I go from a hopeful puppy innocence and feeling the optimism and an overwhelming love, to hating his detachment and feeling the most desperate blackness in my soul. It reminds me of a lazer beam, a most beautiful light, which in high concentration – can slice like a knife… light that can bring darkness, the light within me turns into the menacing, self consumed and biting at my heart and soul instrument of torture..
Secondly, who gives a shit, it’s internet, right? Do I live in a cuckoo land or something, to assign such an importance to some lines on the screen? What is the matter with me? Why do I have to go out there into the world and carry within me whispers of all these conversations, and words, and thoughts, and emotions? Why does it or has it become a huge point of reference in my life? I don’t want it in this way. It is a form of imprisonment, self perpetuated and what a humiliating (before my higher self) state it is, he has no idea…
Thirdly…. I am learning the true meaning of love. I don’t trust myself with loving another. I DO get upset at him. I DO feel like choking him at times. I DO want to tear at him when his speeches feel self righteous, which is often enough. Where is the love? When we TRULY love – do we feel THAT removed emotionally that anything a person does or says – does not touch us inside? I don’t believe this for a second. There are two people in me. One goes through the motions, another one is laughing, pointing the finger ‘Fool! You’ve created a monster’. I have indeed. My emotional energy was and is invested into a myth of another person.
If I feel so powerless…. yes, this is the point, I do feel as having no control, none, over what happens and doesn’t happen, and this is so unsettling. In the contest of this specific relationship it means letting go of all expectations and letting another person be, and hey, the other person ALWAYS stays still, never moving TOWARDS another. It makes one feel unwanted and unneeded, and for me.. that all Piscean/Virgo state of being is DEFINED by those two. Oh holy crap. I am fascinated by the issues of personal power. How it is conveyed, felt, perceived, transmitted, fought by others, and by my place in this whole struggle.
So what does it matter in the vastness of this Universe… my desires drive me round the bend at times, and all is vanity of my own mind and making. How do I deal with all that perpetual inner motion? I don’t know yet. I know that going out into the fields on my bike and sitting there, drinking in the being of one with the nature – helps to detox my mind, if not my body. Yes, desires.
Ultimately, I want to be alone. I don’t want anyone in my life. Because I don’t trust anyone to love and want the ESSENCE of me. And everything else is fake.
I need to leave. I need to give myself time to grow. Without him. I can only allow myself to talk again when I KNOW in my heart that I’ve reached a certain level where just being is enough.
I am sorry.”
Gatubela, I am really happy that you are well.
I am not aiming for beauty… It expressed the basic division invited by the man. I can phrase it differently. Here:
“I just feel that a person of integrity wouldn’t have put other people in a position where they are supposed to ‘make a choice’ between himself and another. What was said was – CHOOSE.”
There was deceit on his part…”a deceitful mind is not able to see the objectivity of the “not choosing”…and surrendering to higher energies.” He wanted a choice… he is a man, Gatubela, and you see him in terms of energies only.. You decided not to choose, but to step away and feel it for yourself, and stay within your soul, rather than the soul of another… You do not take sides, so to speak… He was too quick to not trust your heart, he concluded you made a choice. I feel it affected you. May be you will understand that what happened between you and him is what has been happening between me and him hundreds of times, magnified tenfold. Again and again. Misconceptions turned into negativity of various form and strength… No one walked my shoes. And I am still standing. I saw how utterly nasty and irresponsible and childish he can be. I saw mood swings and his cruel streak. I saw how unfair he can be. In the past I would have recoiled, made a mental list of why this person is simply a jerk, and walked away. Now.. I can see the dark side and not be scared by it, but appreciate its existence and know what’s behind it. When things get tough – I know enough not to judge. Because knowing parts of his Underworld is not judging him… I understand what happened afterwards, but it is the business between you two.
I do not assume. I say what I see and feel. I can see why it is always questioned here. My style of writing tends to generalise. But no one
ever asks HOW I arrived at my generalisations. They do not start from some ’empty head’, ‘heard somewhere’ point.. I start with the atmosphere, my sensitivities now are way off the scale.. the feel of the situation, I see tiny details not visible to others (Virgo, no shit. People miss SO MUCH), I put it all together, then the bigger picture floats in and makes itself available. It also takes time for all those things to settle back into my mind and soul, so I usually don’t write off the top of my head. We have our own tools. I TRUST mine now. But I did get carried away many a time here, jumping to answer without really taking it in.
“If I considered him to be such a meanie as you indicate, then I would never have INITIALLY felt the freedom to say what I did.”
Well… freedom to say things surely doesn’t depend on whether the person in front of you is a meanie or not? Unless it is your life or the life of those you love at stake, and the meanie has a gun… Am I misunderstanding something?
“That Freedom is handed over, through vulnerability and not ego, on a very hidden and subconscious level….and I felt that.”
Vulnerability was there for sure, without a doubt. Freedom.. I didn’t feel what you are feeling. Freedom is not handed over, not for me. He didn’t choose to grant you freedom by leaving. He could have made an attempt to find out WHY you said what you said. He didn’t. I could hazard a guess why not, but you know what? Writing in the last few days let me see one simple truth.. it doesn’t matter what I say or anybody, for that matter. Truth is also multidimensional. How so? Look at the next paragraph.
“His way of interacting with me, permitted that. Which is the EXACT opposite of what you have written.”
His way of interacting with you was not his way of interacting with me. His intent towards you was not his intent towards me, his treatment of you was not his treatment of me, your perceptions of him are different on many levels from mine. So for you it IS the exact opposite, I understand. For me – it felt how I expressed it. His reasons were sincere.. sure. Remember I spoke about reasons behind every intent? Everybody’s reasons are sincere and cannot be faked. His reasons were – he doesn’t trust me. Simple. He detests me. OK. He doesn’t accept my way of perceiving him. Of course. It’s the intent that could be questioned. What was his intent for saying what he was saying? I am not the one who wanted to drive a wedge between people. I am not the one who deleted e-mails after all that. I am not the one who made blogs exclusive. I am not the one who left the Forum. All of it came as a shock to me. It was drastic and uncompromising. There was no need for that. But that’s the way people are.
I do hope you two will find a way back. I feel that you’d like that. His pride runs deep, but he will be back, Gatubela, if you are ready to shake his hand. I feel responsible for what happened, and for you, because it happened because of me, and you felt it very strongly I know…… but he hasn’t left because of me. He’s left because of you.
I am not you, Gatubela. After I posted my last comment – I cried my eyes out because it felt and feels like rape, that’s the way Water is. Piseans are just as protective about their INNER life as Scorpio. This is what it came down to… It was easy for JoJo to write about her encounters with the Butcher, or Mari about her Eagle… you all talk about the honesty of intent, but those guys were not fucking reading those confessions, were they? I chose to tell simply because I said loads about him and nothing about me. I had to be fair, or I couldn’t live with myself, the coward and psychopath that I am.
Gatubela, I feel there are things we could teach each other, we are so different. But life has its own plans for us.
Be well.
Hi Ines,
He is not here to write or comment on any of the things you have mentioned about him. So…it does feel like talking about air, which I do not like to do.
With regards to your perceptions about him to me, I have to say that I do not feel any of those things you mentioned. My heart, soul and mind, feel intact and did not suffer any sensation of him wanting me to choose between anyone. My reactions are due to my own inner energies, not exactly compatible which may appear to others as being harsh, cold and distant, since I have really felt a person put a gun to me. Because I need the darkness to see Ines. So, I detach and isolate myself.
Your perception is again, a bit exaggerated. A person who was really dangerous, in the context that you are presenting, would never offer the option of leaving. Because someone who REALLY wants to harm you, will never be honest about anything or even attempt to do so. They will take anything that “sounds good” and use it for justification of their evil intent towards you. There is no attempt at morality at all…and believe me, even the mere attempt is enough to change the mentality of a truly dangerous person. This is a perpetual never ending cycle because they have no connection to GOD.
Your perceptions do not match what REALLY happened on my side.
Which brings me to the point that you are perceiving things wrongly from my side…and therefore, I feel that what you are perceiving from him, might be just as erroneous.
Dangerous… I didn’t say that at all. I said ‘freedom’. Freedom is not offered. Freedom is not handed over. You felt the freedom to say things because he wasn’t a meanie. If he WAS a meanie… would you remain silent? Your freedom to say things would have been… taken away? Whom by?
“Because someone who REALLY wants to harm you, will never be honest about anything or even attempt to do so.”
True. Who really wanted to harm me? As for honestly… nobody is completely honest. People lie. Just depends on what area of their life they find the most uncomfortable to be honest about. Sure, you can give the man the benefit of the doubt. An exception to the rule. I will keep my reservations.
Erroneous?
Gatubela. Your perceptions on your side are erroneous.
Can you instinctively feel something… contradictory in that statement?
How CAN they be erroneous? There is no right or wrong in our perceptions, that duality again… They are RELATIVE compared to what another person saw, not erronous.They are what you see as it happens and feels at that moment in time – TO YOU. To you ONLY and no one else. What you perceive – is correct. ALWAYS. But relative to other’s perceptions – it may be DIFFERENT. Isn’t it why we carefully listen to OUR INNER VOICE, not voices of others – to establish what is true FOR US? I said “no one ever perceives anything in the same way. Ever. Give it to a hundred people, and you will get back a hundred interpretations.”
The man’s perception of me is that I am a maggot and a psychopath. My friend perceives me as ‘a treat to others’ (she put it that way), and
very genuine. You seemed to have disagreed with his perception of me as a psychopath, although you may feel I am a maggot LOL. Whose
perception of me is ‘erroneous’? Yours? His? My friend’s? Can you answer that?
He can call me a hyena all he likes, it will not make me grow stripes. People here placed such faith in the absolute truth of the man’s
perceptions… even me at some point… even you… Here:
“I don´t feel what you feel. Perhaps I should. Most likely you are absolutely correct.” ???????
Yet, you also said:
“I don´t feel that you know my underworld….not in its entirety”
“and my intent seems to be a mystery to you.”
“If you knew my soul, you would not say such things.”
No one is right or wrong here. However, when it comes to feeling the integrity of one’s SOUL… the choices ARE to be made, and this is
different. This is absolute. And that’s why you flipped, Gatubela. There is no rhyme or reason to it, it was instinctive. And the reason why I was distrustful – my gut feeling about the Underworld. Which I dared to stick my nose in.
I feel that you are looking for some confirmation to your inner search of the last days. You said this:
“you are perceiving things wrongly from my side…and therefore, I feel that what you are perceiving from him, might be just as erroneous.”
You compared my perceptions of you and him and drew conclusions based on THAT? But why? IT DOESN’T MATTER what I perceived in those events. It is mine, and mine only, I shared and I do not expect validation. What matters is what YOU perceive from him in your own soul. Our perceptions are unrelated in any way and never can be, for reasons above.. What I wrote in the last few days was not written with a view of convincing anyone. I needed to get out my perspective without getting stuck in meaningless bickering.. In real life I would look the man in the eye and tell him about my reasons for perceiving him the way I did.
I see man (darkness), Gatubela. You see Spirit (light). Or, perhaps, we both see Dark and Light. But you chose to ACKNOWLEDGE light in
him, always and without reservations. I chose to ACKNOWLEDGE darkness. Verbally. Here. He needs us to see light in him. But me and him got off to a bad start, and the trust was never established after that. I now feel very detached emotionally from what happened.
I will not tell you about my perceptions of you or any events you were part of, anymore. Please do forgive. Being ten months in the firing line.. has ‘trained’ me to be in a certain mode, “à la guerre comme à la guerre”. I have to try and remember that I am a woman, after all. No combat trousers.
And yes, two people discussing another in his absence is very bad taste. Let’s stop there.
INVICTUS
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
William Ernest Henley
It is very male in expression, but… female warriors can relate I am sure……
I have to add, Gatubela, (and I was thinking about it the other day) that I find it much harder to perceive YOU, compared to the man. For two reasons… you are a Leo. I have no fire signs in my chart whatsoever, can you believe that? So feeling you does not come instinctively to me, unlike another Water person. I feel your general character, but that’s not enough. If you didn’t feel it was about a choice… what was it about? What were those reasons that made you say what you did? Do not answer please. It is just for you really to feel it. I still maintain though that it had an affect on you.I am not saying ‘lasting’, but at the time it was taking place.
Secondly… you do live in a different universe, much removed psychically from the life of ‘mortal’ citizens. You perceive things on an energetic plane. We both may be talking about the same things, but describe them differently. I use normal mortal language. Men (regardless of their evolution level) are and always will be attached to form, with very rare exceptions. Ego. Ego. and Ego. This is what I saw here. It may not be detectable to you. I don’t know how to explain it.
My regards.
“They will take anything that “sounds good” and use it for justification of their evil intent towards you. There is no attempt at morality at all…”
Hehehe….
“She has never genuinely cared for you.”
“She has intentionally slipped in words of praise to you,”
“She had known your spirited quality to enjoy compliments and praise,”
“Her compliments to each of us are selective from a very dark strata of her mind.”
“she exploited whatever we as a group of individuals sincerely expressed between each other”
“It was to drive an unsettling, doubtful wedge between us. That was her goal from the start.”
“Sounds good”, doesn’t it? That’s just one comment. Oops… what was the intent again? I wonder how you feel about me in the context of all those. Feel them. I might be REALLY all those things, hey… the man’s perceptions never lie, do they? Why do you talk to such an evil, unprincipled, vile person?
Calling me names is an equivalent of hitting me in real life. But you know… IF it WAS taking place in real physical life… he wouldn’t touch me with a finger. It’s not who he is. And it’s not the dynamics that would be.
I am not challenging you, Gatubela. Those contradictions tickle me, that’s all.
My experiences point out otherwise….there is a huge difference in being hit and name calling.
This is what happens to air when they go into the abyss with no love….you are beginning to sound alot like this….
Yeah…I can really feel the darkness now….
Have a good life.
I said the equivalent, the online equivalent.
I have said what I needed to say. It was not about love. It was about what it feels like on my side, whether anyone finds it acceptable or not. I don’t feel love right now. But neither do I feel hate. As I said I am detached and feel nothing. Yes, it is not pretty. No one here suggested that abyss is pretty.
You too have a good life, Gatubela.
Good bye.
When my ex hit me once, I chose to ignore it. When he did it the second time, I chose to leave. This will always be my choice. So no, being hit and being called names is not the same. But it hurts the same.
When I choose not to turn the blind (loving) eye and quote what was said about me in all its glory – I suddenly become that vile person. I should ignore it and kiss the hand of the one who chose to bless me with those beautiful insights.
Gatubela, you said one you don”t understand men, you understand the energy. Well… you don’t understand men. He left as you rejected his request. REJECTED. What reacts in my watery nature now is what reacted in the watery nature of the man…… That intensity of feeling which you, NONE of you except him – have no fucking idea about…. the lies…. the double standard…. the cover ups… I too could kill now, and no, it’s not pretty at all inside. I don’t live in astral world, I am real, flesh and blood, I feel and love and suffer and change and I don’t cover up other people’s bullshit with lame excuses…. and yes, I am mad now at this hypocrisy… I am so mad you have no idea….. oscillate is nothing compared to that…. He is forgiven for that. I am condemned. Render onto Caesar… I see the meaning of surrender. Women are love. They can take suffering. They should kiss the hand of the one who brought it on. They should love and forgive. They should not expect equal treatment with men. Men are weaker sex. They need nurture and love, hahaha….women don’t. Hey, women!!! Women need punishment, to make them better women. I need more punishment for being that vile terrible person. I need as much punishment as one person can possibly take. I haven’t had enough. I need more for this is good for me. After that – I will become a stronger person. I will not feel anything for anyone inside anymore. I will become detached. Like an Easter Island Statue…..in solitude, detached. We are all strong inside, aren’t we? No man is an island? We are. We are all islands in the sea of spirituality, we stand alone, we fight alone, we are all for aloneness. It feels fantastic to be alone. No cherries on top. Words of love are for weak people. Hugs are for weak people. Appreciation of one another is for weak people. For those who are insensitive, out there in the big wide world, it is full of cruel and insensitive people, but here we are grateful to our inner kindness, it manifests in many unexpected ways,,,,, such as name calling… or a slap on the face, anyone? A touch of brutality will do you good, remember? You are supposed to be slapped and steamrolled and bulldozed over,,,,,, you will be better for that. We are sensitive people, we love the world and others. That’s why we stand alone – because of love.
Everybody needs a villain, since I am such a vile terrible cancerous person – I will just morph into that role offered to me by the people who know how to love – and will stalk this Forum as the Black Heart Ghost Rider or whatever it is was offered in that video.
Thanks for pointing me in the right direction. I have found my meaning in life at last.
and I cry and laugh at the same time now because I am doing exactly the same the man did… I am reacting to my own inner tide of madness, oh man, we are so fucking alike in the way we process things.. they may love you but they will never understand your |Underworld inthe same way I do, because they have no access to it.. this is really sad…
we both unraveled. Figure that one out, Gatubela… no, you can’t. I understood from the last few days that all our perceptions are limited. There are things that you do not see… it is clear to me now. Likewise, I do not see things that you see. I am wise enough to know and not judge. You have judged what… twice in the last ten days? And you don’t understand what happened? You cannot see why he left?? I do.
For a Water person what you wrote was cold and unfeeling, indifferent and rejecting. When I wore my Water glasses – this is how I saw it. When I got detached from my Watery nature and read it again – I saw just you expressing what you felt at that moment. He didn’t take off his Watery glasses. That’s how he took it. He has never been on the receiving end of it from you, so it came as a shock… It hurt him. I was the same towards him many times, but I do not feel my remarks hurt him because he doesn’t respect me and detests me, so it didn’t matter to him. It was different with you. He respects you.
In the same vein, he was the same to me most of the time, and it hurt, and I reacted, and then I stopped reacting, but carried on saying things to him, and he would pay me back… but of course it was me on the receiving end, he didn’t care. He is very sensitive to what is said to him and now, Gatubela. If I expressed my love to him in the way he wanted (and I know how).. doesn’t matter now anyway.
He is a man first, and a spiritual person second. You don’t see that in him. You see mysterious energies.
I wish you a good reconciliation. If he decides to come back – he needs you here.
Easter Island statues are actually Chilean. They have a very spiritual meaning, and no, they do not stand alone. There is a sensation of feeling your ancestors and ancient culture as well. Recently, a man carved a statue and will give it as a gift to Japan, as a result of the earthquake there.
So….no, you are never alone. But of course, many people do not feel their own heritage. I am lucky that I do….
The reason why I said that you were erroneous is because you
failed to detect what REALLY happened. It was not a dualistic statement – you have been passing judgements and emotional outbursts on P.Puppy, based on your watery sensitivities that you trust so much. You may have to accept the idea that there might have been an error, and release your anger and impotence. I wish my experiences were a bit more accessable to your piscean sensitivities, but for me, unless someone is literally holding that gun, or using their fists, without your “VOLUNTARY ENGAGEMET”, then yes, you are in danger. Someone offering harsh honesty with you claiming to see his dark, while expressing anger and all of that jazz, is “NOT LOVING” . There will be no truth. As truth can only be sought out, with LOVE. What you are fantasizing over, is illusion.
The biggest villian sometimes, is ourselves.
As for what you said about P.Puppy, again, he is not here to comment.
Gatubela,
I had some serious reaction to your video yesterday, Months of being under attack and the intensity of my nature contribute to that.
It is not loving on either side, I am sorry you cannot see that. It will carry on, the most vulnerable things I said will be used, and it is already happening. This is what unevolved Scorpio men do, the world is full of those… and the Internet is full of people comparing their experiences on the subject… I expected that. There is no harsh honesty in it. Only brutality. If you say there is harsh honesty, then for you I am a maggot and a psychopath. So be it.
I cannot accept the error of the situation until there is another explanation. What REAlly happened? You will not say, so it is a useless thing to say to me.
I now saw first hand what abuse and bad treatment can do. They can turn a perfectly normal kind person into a bitter individual, and it takes a lot to stay within one’s soul and not fall. I don’t want to fall. And I don’t want to accept an artificially created negativity from another. People who suffered that in real life – may never come out of that fall and often learn from it to give back negativity in spades. No, I am not talking about myself. I am a feminine woman in real life. What happens here is a vicious, horrible parallel reality. An abnormality, which I don’t want to be part of anymore.
I don’t hate the man. I love the man. But I have to respect myself.
I have nothing more to say.
Ahh but the spirit and authenticity of this Puppy is here with you as usual, little Leo.
Questions box:
1- What is rejection?
2- Is the feeling of rejection real?
3- Is rejection a reaction of feeling which fortifies the walls of ego entities?
4- Is vicarious ego intrinsic?.. is ego organic?… is ego timeless?
5- Are subjective projections powerless in our human ego world?
6- Is true perceptiveness the equal manifestation of fearful projection?
7- Do fearful subjective illusions of power demonstrate a code of principles?
8- Does my self-control, in walking away from meaningless quarrels in the midst of a corrupted personality disease, mean… I am “unraveling”?
9- Does a diseased, corrupted, ignorant personality, portray me as someone who actually ‘wants’ darkness and suffering with her? … and to “merge” because I am “watery”?
10- Or could it be this soul (yours truly) know the traps and seductions of darkness, negative glib, the imagined fears and the neurotic self-pity it creates in our ability to choose the quality of life?
11- Does the concept of the feminine mean, in my world.. a supportive energy to my convictions and freewill to choose my stance through her own individuated love?…or does her utterly masculine ego rigid mentality, her futile nag agenda, mean, in my world, that she is THE spirit I could flourish with and find true fulfillment and grow with?
Answers box:
1- An imagined fear crippling the person by the storm of narrow subjective feelings housed in the comforts of ones ego fortress. Creating shallow assumptions and biases splattered at human nature and coddled in the unknown feelings of ones convoluted ‘self’.
Also rationalizes the unknowns of feeling, does not fee, nor perceive any realm of intuition, as a result the reaction of rejection projects that inner mess outward onto the world. No responsibility is taken for ones actions. None. The subjective barrage always finds it’s safety through it’s disillusioned reasoning beliefs, and to support the ego, gets thrills by blaming the cause of such ambivalence of what has penetrated… or shattered, their once precious ego.
2- No. From the multidimensional, eternal consciousness of ones inner-depth and capacity to see/feel the world collectively, through dark risen into the light, regardless of any uncomfortable emotions. No.
3- Of course it’s a baseless reaction not founded in truth, not founded in the soul-truth absorption of what is innately true about the person (ego) involved, and completely obtuse to understanding ones true motivations and causes to of those motivations. Subjective reactions and assumptions and false beliefs, like the ones we’ve seen splayed like vomit the last week here, demonstrates how fears of unknown feelings, sends a mortal (ego-attachment) running for her life. haha. No pun.
4- No….No……………and No.
5- Powerless to such an extreme, it has to create a warped belief by convincing itself that it has real power, and knows love.
6- Nothing equal. There’s a quantum space of consciousness between them. Perceptive people taste the truth, they see and feel it intuitively through spirit and love manifest. Projections however, smear the truth via their only agenda to serve ego and maintain status quo at any personal cost. Projections believe unquestioningly what is fed to them on the surface, by the collective myth, (e.g workplace politics, status means power myth) thus they rationalize what narrow hole they dwell in and fester by sucking others defined and expressed boundaries. Such babies have no stance in life. Which is why they suck.
7- No, subjective ignorance demonstrates the powerlessness of ones ability to grow socially, sexually, psychologically, and most obviously- spiritually.
8- Yes. I’m really unraveling. Can’t you just sense the despair and misery I send your way? Please join me in my petulance. Suck that.
9- LoL.
10- Yes, the quality of my life goes far beyond the admission of not respecting and not talking to select persons whom claim to fit me into their sad, sad little puzzle.
11- Yes (first part)… and No. There will never be fulfilling adventure and love in my existence with a woman who spews mental weakness. Her political agenda to control, thanks to seeds swallowed in her life with men, earns her the label of– the woman who is all man. The epitome of femininity to me, is not a shallow billboard begging for respect and saying– “I am so special!.. You watch and see!.. As I will try everything egotistically possible to emasculate you… and then portray myself as powerful!”.
The entity of fear and how it literally controls lives everywhere, the choices in peoples lives, is endlessly enriching for me to observe.
Hi P.Puppy,
Not much to say to you, except get ready for a bath….
There is a name…
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_personality_disorder
There is no soul here, just the TALK about one.
I AM SPECIAL. You’ve spent ten months so far trying hard to prove to others otherwise. Can’t walk away. Can’t keep quiet. Can’t choose not to talk about me. Scorpio Mars…Pisces Mars… 8th House… Even there we are connected. Holy crap.
Yo are like a parrot here… fear… fear… fear… anything new? But if you insist…. Emasculate… is that the fear you have? Tell that Pluto in the 7th to stop ‘running for his life’. You fucked off from here, not me. Afraid of a woman without the support of another. Came back only when saw the change of attitude. Coward.
“My time has expired here. Thanks to all women who fought with me. I hope you’re smiling. I’ll read this blog, but there is nothing more I need to write.”
v.
“Does my self-control, in walking away from meaningless quarrels ”
Yes, right. Self control for ten days.. The same as the last time you said you were going. The pull to be back too strong huh… No, I don’t know you….
“or does her utterly masculine ego rigid mentality, her futile nag agenda, mean, in my world, that she is THE spirit I could flourish with and find true fulfillment and grow with?”
.. you thought of ‘she’ as the Spirit to grow and flourish with? That came into your head? Argh…. Fascinating…. Freudian Slip. Subconscious talking? Get a grip please.
A person who is afraid of any emotional involvement, who is afraid of women on a very deep level, no, not on the level of physical mortal existence, but on a level of true connection…because he is so afraid to loose his independence… because he falls for women hard and fast, and the possibility of inner enslavement is so real… and the volcano inside might consume him to the point of self destruction… who doesn’t trust his own ability to control sexual energies when in love… who cannot acknowledge his own pain of the past and projects to all and sundry… who cannot keep lasting relationships with anyone… I have to go down to your level, you don’t get it otherwise, so … suck that projection of yours. I used some words that you understand in the post. Do forgive..
You are not too much for me. You are NOT ENOUGH.
Here is the question… what do you truly want?
DONE WITH YOU
Dear Sir,
I have to decline your invitation of joining you in your petulance. Whatever it is you wanted me to suck – you have to crack your whip at… what do you call them… little sanguines in distress… women who write to you.
Gatubela is ready with the bath towel and slippers for you.. It will be peaceful from now on. Go take a nap.
I will not be dragged into your Underworld anymore.
You do not exist.
The authentic Ignorant Narcissist. Of Water decent: river god and nymph were his parents. He learned self love through seeing self as separate entity, died through loving self and is spending his afterlife as a Ghost in the Underworld gazing into River Styx – at self.
But why should I despair? I’m sure he burns
With equal flames, and languishes by turns.
When-e’er I stoop, he offers at a kiss,
And when my arms I stretch, he stretches his.
His eye with pleasure on my face he keeps,
He smiles my smiles, and when I weep he weeps.
When e’er I speak, his moving lips appear
To utter something, which I cannot hear.
“Ah wretched me! I now begin too late
To find out all the long-perplexed deceit;
It is my self I love, my self I see;
The gay delusion is a part of me.
I kindle up the fires by which I burn,
And my own beauties from the well return.
Whom should I court? how utter my complaint?
Enjoyment but produces my restraint,
And too much plenty makes me die for want.
How gladly would I from my self remove!
And at a distance set the thing I love.
My breast is warm’d with such unusual fire,
I wish him absent whom I most desire.
But there is more, much more. There are two types of self love. Read Ovid.
“What I long for – I have.”
The Narcissist is only ignorant when he or she chooses only to mirror “self” or ego . Perhaps you got pulled into someone´s “underworld”…but your own reactions were not magically created out of the blue – they ARE you. Why “merge” with the bad stuff if you are so “innocent”?
IF…what is happening what you say is happening, there is no one on earth that can make you choose what you mirror….you did that all on your own.
I….I….I…me….me…..me….
What is happening here, is the “world” that you live in….
Gatubela…
If you saw somewhere that I said I am ‘innocent’ – you need a pair of glasses. My reactions are mine. I am not perfect. If you do not react to anything in your life – I admire you for that. If you lived with a psychopath for forteen years and couldn’t leave, you are probably used to hiding a lot of things inside. But then you also have been seeking since a young woman.. I have posted things and said things which show I am numan. Which show that I know my pitfalls. Not ‘innocent’. Not ‘guilty’, thanks for that duality. Just human. You are trying to REPROACH ME for that?
I am not the one who has been ‘me’ing here for five years. He is the man. That’s all the difference between us. He is forgiven WHATEVER he will do and say.. Yes, there is always an army of bunnies to feed the ego of an ‘Eagle’. I understand the dynamics. This place is the same as any other group formation out there. The hypocricy of it all makes me SICK.
“IF…what is happening what you say is happening” WTF!?? What is happening that I say is happening? This is utterly surreal to the point where I am just beginning to laugh at the absurdity of the whole thing. It is not real anymore, it truly is a parallel universe. It’s like I am talking about one thing, and you look me in the eye and say something completely different. Not relating to what I just expressed to you. You know… I asked you a question. I asked you a few before. Any uncomfortable questions you and another always choose to ignore. Ask yourself why? I don’t want to be all ,me, me’. But I cannot ask questions, because you all are so fucking secretive. All you guys want to do is ‘TEACH’. Never share. Only lecture.
Do not make judgements on my world, please. THIS is not my world. You know nothing about me, Gatubela, other then what I chose to tell here. Which is much more than anyone has done. And whatever perceptions of me you have – you share with the man, so…
If this maggot is not here – the place goes dead. I am giving it back to you.
I did not reproach you….
Yes, that is what I am “TRYING” to tell you….what you are perceiving, may not be REAL. Or…if what you are perceiving is REAL, WTF are you doing with it?
IF you felt love, what REALLY happened would have been obvious. So no, I am not hiding anything. I am just leaving it where you can seek it. Any piscean would understand that…and scorpio even more.
For now, that is the unknown for you…and what you are unable to perceive.
Your sensitivities may be a bit out to lunch, IF you can not perceive truth…have you considered that?
OK, Gatubela, a bit more clear..
I have considered it. Bear with me, it is very hard to convey…
My sensitivities currently operate from the ego level. From that level, of course, the man behaves like a megalomaniac. Maybe this level is
not accessible to you anymore. What really happened between you and him (that’s what I meant, not between me and him)… I gave you my ego based assessment of what people would normally see in the situation. I can tell you from that assessment that he will NEVER ask you again for what he asked of you. Ever. I cannot feel any other explanation rather than what I told you. Whatever it is you feel about your situation – is not accessible to me.
The level of tackling my vulnerabilities on his part has progressively escalated. I can see that from what was a few months ago and now – he certainly got deeper and deeper… because I didn’t treat the bullshit with a smile and non resistance and detachment from it, much like in your video, which I absolutely got (and yes, all of what he threw at me is bullshit). I just felt it applies to all evolved women, not just Scorpio… maybe, you meant Scorpio energy in us, mine in Neptune, so again – very intense. I feel… there is probably not much more left to escalate to, other than go physical:( IF I was met with that level in his very first post – I probably would have crumbled there and then. Now… what else can hurt me? Silence? He doesn’t understand my fundamental nature of – the connection IS THERE. Eternally. I have access to all of who he is in my consciousness at any time. Silence cannot kill that. Bullshit cannot kill that. There is nothing that can kill it. I won’t do a Bella Swan, I will just brood and think and feel and… come out to play again.
And oh damn.. something has just struck me like a bolt…and it will be used against me, but who cares… knickers off LOL I am a control freak. And the deeper I look at it…I wanted to fool myself by saying ‘I only control my immediate environment’. Then I feel.. look deeper, you control everything that comes into contact with you. It is not an aggressive type of control, very subtle… unconscious.. And the thing is.. you KNOW on a very deep level that NOTHING, absolutely nothing can be controlled in this life. Life takes a new expression every minute, what was yesterday – is not today. You have to accept this simple truth and.. let go…’
Why does it happen? Virgo perfectionism, and Piscean Idealism… seeing life as it should be, not how it is, I spoke about it before, but didn’t see this in myself. The idealised and the perfect life, which I try to bring to fruition by control. So much can fall into this illusory trap… and be destroyed, and the perfect life remains way beyond the reach. The intensity of my nature needs some stability to be offset against. I desperately search for it through – control.
Hmmm.. that’s good to know. Letting go is gonna be a hell of a job. You let go when that gun was against your head…. gives me chills… what did it FEEL like? Is that too much to ask, Gatubela?
PEOPLE who have Neptune in Scorpio are in danger of being too critical, skeptical and sarcastic. It is a distinctly malefic, reactive and materialistic position for this planet. It tends to exert a destructive influence in the lives of those having it so placed. A power so spiritual as Neptune finds scant opportunity for expression in so militant, physical and harsh a sign as Scorpio.
Thus, although we find major minds with Neptune in this position, we find few that are free from a strong hint of perversity. Even Michael Angelo, majestic figure that he was, was no angel; he possessed strong material passions, a proud, almost arrogant will, and a fierce temper. Yet were his energy, determination and courage those of a Hercules — endowments in which this position of Neptune played no small part.
In general, we must remember that those born with Neptune in Scorpio have never been born save in a time of war, pestilence and unrest. Peace seems not to attend the passage of Neptune through the scorpion. Thus, while the mature generals who assisted Napoleon and Wellington were men with Neptune in Leo or Virgo, the young soldiers who composed the bulk of their armies were men with Neptune in Scorpio.
When Neptune in Scorpio is afflicted, it arouses the vilest impulses, obsessions and neurotic perversion that man is heir to. During the last passage of Neptune through Scorpio, so many criminals of a brutal fierceness were at large that England maintained a regular series of criminal ships to Australia, while France built up the African provinces in the same way.
Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, Disraeli, George Sand, Michael Angelo, Victor Hugo, Durer, Dumas, Sir William Hamilton, Copernicus, Caesar Borgia, Thiers, Keats, Macaulay, Balzac, Lord Lytton, Emerson, Carlyle, John Brown, are notable examples of those having Neptune in Scorpio.
Obviously from the list of famous figures, the position of this planet in Scorpio is one of power.
Hmmmm… Looks scary… Michelangelo was Piscean.
Neptune in Scorpio 2012
“Your role in 2012 is now coming to fruition. It is time to stretch beyond the sensual to the universal deep experience that reaches everyone in your life and your creativity. You are likely to find yourself having built upon the concrete, earthy qualities of this Neptune image. Now comes the challenge—you must take to the limitless watery realm of reality that doesn’t know boundaries. It is magical and it demands that you let go of what is solid and familiar. Now is the time for you to learn to adapt and inspire with your passionate drive that others find so compelling.”
Let go of solid and familiar, hahaha… I love astrology.
What planets do you have in Scorpio, Gatubela?
Spare some thought..
Narcissism is one of the expressions of the soul, taken to extreme. Soul has many different needs, often contradicting and in need of a balance. We want solitude and we want communion with another, we feel love and get ashamed when we feel hate, we long for peace, and we need conflict to attain it, we dive into each of those soulful states without accepting their intrinsic validity and naturallness to our being. Guilt ridden humans stalk the Earth, shattered by own inability to reconcile the complexities of the soul demands.
Humility versus Ego is the milestone of a narcissist to negotiate. Healthy ego needs to be taken care of, without destruction of it and without inflating it to an empty bouncy castle. Narcissist has dreams of galactic propotions which others see as an affliction, wanting to pull him/her off the high hourse… Crush him/her, who do they think they are? And yes, it can get really ugly. A well developed ego will not give up territories without a fight. But what is projected out into the world is high confidence, a great belief in self worth, and an ability to make things come true for self and others.. It is a rare combination in need of nurture and an outlet for self expression, it is
HOW they are expressed – will make all the difference. People sunconsciously engage in subjects most important to them. Narcissists talk of self incessantly, but ask ourselves… is that the constructive and CREATIVE way of self expression? It leads to a vicious circle of reinforcing narcissistic tendencies – without real soulful expression. If carefully nurtured, a Narcissist has no limits to what he/she can achieve, both within and in the world.
Negative narcissism… yes, it exists too. A person cannot accept that anything they do – is good enough. Tell them they have created the
most beautiful design for a school building, and they will tell you that it is nothing compared to Le Corbusier. Here the fragility of ego is searching for affirmations through negation of self. Here the ego is unstable, wanting to die any minute, but clutching for the shreds of own existence, because it knows that an individual is nothing without one. What is the connection between those two types? That of – SELF. Preoccupation with ‘I’ as a shadow reflection that ‘I’ is fragile and tender in a narcissist. Both types (and guess who is representative of which type on here) have a deeply complicated relationship with ‘I’, a never ending bloody battle with self taking place unnoticed and unacknowledged by others.
The problem of the narcissist is that he/she knows own battlefield in depth. Please do not remind them about its existence. It will only lead to fierce self defence. They are too aware how to locate the origin of own misery, they could tell you with precision why, how and when. Of course they never will. What they need more than anything is to learn self acceptance of own egotistic tendencies, without dragging those around with them wherever they go. Not just understand own need for it, but truly embrace the Ego that is struggling for survival within and give it – validity and the RIGHT to exist. Then the battle will be over. The ego will dissolve into the soul and will become a natural part of its expression.
How is that achieved? Strangely, for a narcissist to find self affirmation from within is always a struggle, despite a seemingly easy access to ‘I’. They can intellectualise their own ability to do so, and even feel, on some superficial level, that they are free from the chains. But let’s not forget than narcissist is of Water decent, meaning that each one has unfathomable depths of soul. How to get to that hard to reach ‘I’ that wants to live regardless? ANOTHER. Love of narcissistic ‘I’, and ‘Self’ by another. Narcissists crave attention from others instinctively, and they will find a way to get it somehow. Because they also instinctively know that the cure lies in immersing one’s soul in love.
Love them. Do not question. Do not interrogate. Do not doubt them. Do not place conditions on their expression. Do not challenge their beliefs. Do not expose their vulnerabilities to the world. It will not be easy, but it’s the only way. Accept them, and they will learn to accept themselves. They will stop ressurecting the corpse. Narcissism is ultimately the soul’s condition in search of true self love.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails” (I Corinthians 13:1-8a)
Did we love? I wasn’t any of those things certainly, and I will not speak for others. Having feelings, no matter whether negative or positive, should not affect the way we BEHAVE towards the one we love.. no matter five years down the line, or twenty five years down the line. Love is bloody, and painful, not a fairy tale of ever after fed to us through media and books.. and not a static process where, once established – it shines like a diamond and never fades… It is a diamond at times, yes, it reflects the light of us, but sometimes it is dark and dull, more like a muddy rock, because there is no light coming through, and one has to look for it within self and not look for reflection from another. This is how relationships are… get that diamond out, examine it again… put it up against each other- does it still reflect light? Look at your own reflection – is the light still there, mulifaceted and rainbow like, how it was in the beginning? If it isn’t – clean it up = change, give up what’s holding you and your love back. And we stumble and always will, but do we fall? Do we look into the eyes of another and say ‘I don’t love you anymore’, because the initial rash of ‘being in love’ has dissipated. Do we choose ‘disposable love’? Do we choose to fall?
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles/200512/field-guide-narcissism
It gives a mainstream perspective on narcissism. Narcissism is branded a ‘condition’, but it is the soul’s search for one’s other part, that without the ego, and for the need to fuse the two together.
I did read that guide…
“Love them….”
Vs.
“Narcissism is one of the expressions of the soul, taken to extreme..”
…”Do not question. Do not interrogate. Do not doubt them. Do not place conditions on their expression. Do not challenge their beliefs. Do not expose their vulnerabilities to the world. It will not be easy, but it’s the only way. Accept them, and they will learn to accept themselves. They will stop ressurecting the corpse. Narcissism is ultimately the soul’s condition in search of true self love.”
Love ultimately is none of these things. What a hypocrisy!
The soulful condition of searching for love, is “KNOWING SELF”. And in many cases, knowing self in the state of humility and feeling God.
A narcissist in your scenario, just dies in themselves and stays there. I don´t see these things at all with P.Puppy.
A soul searcher, knows their true selves because the reflection they see in the water, is not of themselves, but of the cosmos.
I have my own, six water, Pluto Rising/Moon, Pluto year 17 year old treasure… and we reached a point where some serious power negotiation is taking place. This is how it goes…
I tell him that I have my reasons for asking him not to do what he does, to do with eating arrangements. He says ‘Are you going to do this? Yes or no.’ I say ‘I won’t answer until you hear me out.’ He starts walking away. I say ‘Why don’t you at least listen’… He turns around and says ‘ I can see your reasons. I just don’t agree with them’. I think of Pluto, instantly get consumed by laughter and say ‘OK, do not agree, I put my hands up, we will just go hungry then.’ He bursts out laughing too, comes to me, gives me a bear hug and disappears to his room, mumuring something on the lines of ‘I love how we do this’. He knows he will not go hungry. I start cooking, he has to eat, after all… and I love him enough not to punish him by being stubborn. He comes out to the aromas from the kitchen, sees that the dinner is cooked and gets all affectionate and puppy like. I say ‘You son of a… You’ve had it your way. Like Pluto’… He again laughs and looks happy, and I know that at this moment in time I can ask him ANYTHING. And I will get it. And that’s how it works in real life with a Strongly Scorpionic Person. I don’t wonder what goes through his head, and why he does things the way he does. If he wants to tell me – he comes and tells me.
Fear is the result of PERCEIVING danger, NOT the danger itself. Fears are PROJECTIONS of danger, even in the absence of one. When we see a tiger, we perceive the danger of being chased and eaten, we are afraid of the act of being eaten, not the tiger itself. In contrast, when we see the tiger in the Zoo, we do not feel fear, because THERE IS NO DANGER of us being eaten. But the gate got unlocked, the tiger is suddenly out and nearing us… oops.. we are terrified.
So… are fears imaginary? From that perspective – yes. Unless the danger is real and immediate – all fears are projections of what MIGHT happen, but possible never will. BUT guess what… no amount of rationalising is going to remove the fact that everybody FEELS fear, evolved or not. Everybody perceives danger in one way or another. ‘through dark risen into the light, regardless of any uncomfortable emotions’… that’s the catch… people still have those – UNCOMFORTABLE EMOTIONS. A pinch at one’s heart, be it rejection or frustration, will always occur, we are not robots. If an evolved person feels none of those… I guess my choice is to stay away from a person who lost the ability to feel. So… to answer that question ‘Is the feeling of rejection real?’ – yes, THE FEELING of rejection is very real.
That’s why it was chosen as a point to answer, among others.
Subconscious truly does exist. Here it manifests in the way people choose to answer or ignore certain points – look at what they chose to answer or express – and you will know what scratched at their heart in your comment. Look at what they chose to add from themselves – and you will know what SPOKE to them from within their psyche. Feel at how they tackled that point – and you will know what they actually felt when writing the answer. With me… My answers do not convey my emotions, unless I went through a storm. I do feel deeply, but alas, that’s me. Not all that is in the back of the shop – goes into the window display.
I am thinking about what was said to me here… And I ask myself ‘Take a bird’s eye view. Already you are immune to pain which you had to deal with in the last many months, no one saw that, but you. Can words strip you of your being?’ The bottom line was – I was accused of possesing mental weakness.. Can it really be true? What is the mental weakness? Is the woman who wanted to learn about herself through another and stayed through thick and thin = mentally weak? Is the woman who chose to seek her own truth, rather than blindly accept the truth of another = mentally weak? Is the woman who admitted her fears = mentally weak? Is the woman who never walked away from any temper tantrums = mentally weak? Is the woman who talked about her character flaws and obsessions openly = mentally weak? Is the woman who is doing something about facing those head on = mentally weak? Is the woman who is willing to transform that which she didn’t know she had acquired over a lifetime = mentally weak? It is the same as saying to an achoholic who saw the error of his addiction and wants to do something about it ‘Ah, but you admitted to your alchoholism. You are mentally weak’.So… no cherry on top [shrug]. But I found my own cherry in the above. Take that.
Saying this here now feels a painful relief (a paradox, I know). As if after a prolonged illness, when the whole body is weak and aching, one can hardly make a step, is swaying… and still attempts to walk. Movement is affirmation of life. The static rigidity of mental attitudes is where the weaknesses accumilate.
Am I weak? I let others decide, but I have my answer.
I won’t read the Forum anymore.
I am sorry.
lol! Ok you are the STRONGEST!!!! Happy?
Now go away! You just ruined the entire forum. Stop writing all those shit in your head!
Ines
pls don’t listen to others. you’re alright, you speak your mind, but too much of it lol!! step back!
scorp will sting til death. you keep falling into trap. be smart take your time off. you are better than that, love yourself.
you’ll be ok girl
🙂
“The bottom line was – I was accused of possesing mental weakness.. Can it really be true?”
Yes, it can be. The fact that you ask this question indicates some sort of weakness on your part. No one is perfect and we all make mistakes or fall into weaknesses. The problem is not striving to do it. This is true stagnation. The mind often fools us by feeling mutable, when it is really just sponging out the infinite combinations of how to interpret any given situation. Your piscean stance of “no stance” is not strength. The blade of grass which bends to the wind, is still “A BLADE OF GRASS”. It does not change its identity according to the trees and flowers around it.
In this context, movement is not the affirmation of life for me…what affirms life is my capacity to maintain it, nurture it and understand that it is not just mental, but soulful…from the heart. It is just emptiness if I do not feel it connected or strive to do so.
You have justified your “mental strength” by asking more questions. The mind will NEVER give you the answers.
LoL….Not that there is anything wrong with asking…just that you attempt to answer yourself…by not really answering either. The mind will never follow through with ACTION either. So, what is said, is never what is DONE.
No…movement is not the affirmation of life for me…what affirms life is my capacity to maintain it, nurture it and understand that it is not just mental, but soulful…from the heart. It is just emptiness if I do not feel it connected or strive to do so.
“He again laughs and looks happy, and I know that at this moment in time I can ask him ANYTHING. And I will get it. And that’s how it works in real life with a Strongly Scorpionic Person.”
This is not true. A strongly scorpionic person, (who is not your son), will feel that you are manipulating. It will feel toxic and limitting because intrinsically, they know the fatal consequences of a person who uses this tactic and they acquiesce. There is nothing more unpleasant than having to always be with a person who does not structure themselves to some sort of idea of right and wrong. Instead, leaving these grey areas means that they are a slave to their own desires and wants with the mental capacity to find or invent, the right perspective and “make it right”…
These people do not guide themselves through “life or death” of their soul, if they deviate from their soulful source of unique individuality.
Scorpio will appreciate a person who feels that it is death to not love…as they often feel that love does not bring out the death in them and they feel their hearts more.
Gatubela,
I asked YOU two questions.. did you actually ANSWER them? And you are telling me it’s no good asking questions of MYSELF. Do you even
understand what it is I was doing by asking those questions? They were not asked for the reasons of doubt. NO. I will explain. Perhaps your
Apollo sunshine loves you up each and every way, sending its rays right into your soul.. your natural state of being. I live in the cold depths of oceanic reality, the sun does not penetrate it much, the sunshine is ALWAYS of my own creation. If I feel like giving myself a reassuring hug, to make myself warmer… who is there to stop me? You are not able to understand my soul, its needs, its expression, you will never understand why I say things that I say, and what it all means.. I don’t expect you to, we are simply too different. If you want to share your world – please do. If you want to assume things about mine – let’s not talk. I know you mean well, but you really do NOT live in the mortal world anymore. And you’ve been on this Forum waaayyyyyy too long to remain totally objective. Like all of us you have blind spots…
With regards to Scorpio men… it would help if you could sometimes detach from your astral existence and how things SHOULD be – and look instead at the reality of how they are. “Do as I say, but do not do as I do”… is your Scorpio in a nutshell.. You will be packed off to the dumpster when you state your point to your Scorpio man and stand up for it. Lucky you IF he agrees. If he doesn’t.. again and again… are you still with him, Gatubela? Hypocricy in that love, you say? You bet!! Most Scorpios are dim and blind to that ugly feature of their world, and I am not putting a favourable spin on that. This whole Forum is one big promotion board to the virtues of a Scorpio man – AS HIS VERY BEST IDEAL. Which is far from the truth out there. Go on to any astrology Forum, and the Scorpio boards always have twice as many postings (followed by Pisceans, haha!), as any other sign. None of us are our best ideal. We all manifest abominable traits, as well as admirable traits. So let’s face this uncomfortable truth, shall we? Instead of clinging to an artificially maintained status quo here.
…I imagined that petite Leo woman who went through so much crap in her life, and still – kept her patience, and her heart, and her own counsel. And all I felt was compassion. So, dear Cat… I had that gun in my hand, ready to shoot… and I couldn’t do it. Here: “Scorpio will appreciate a person who feels that it is death to not love…as they often feel that love does not bring out the death in them and they feel their hearts more.” what you do not see is…. I am THAT within, Pisceans share that with Scorpio.. How can I shoot you down? When I feel my heart more simply BECAUSE you let me feel yours? I respond to love only. So I dropped all of the points I wanted to make based on what you wrote (manipulative, weak, shape shifting, no stance, no identity, unprincipled me). We are ALL those things at times. And we are ALL the opposite of those at times. Where does the balance lie is where we stop being those and become something else. BECOMING.
@doublescorp… ruined the Forum? Is there anything you can say for yourself? Care to share ‘non shit’ you have in YOUR head? Say something constructive, little side commentator. I didn’t see YOU talk… ever. dead weight.
@BBQ… thanks! Good points.
P.S. I am done with arguing. But if anyone steps on my toes FOR THE FUN OF IT – they will bear the marks of a shark bite, and it will be
painful. I have sensored myself too much here.
My South Node (past lives – karmic bonds) is in Scorpio. I ultimately feel past lessons of destructive attachments, the cold hand of physical death, that total realisation that is WILL happen, when the blood turns to ice and the body becomes paralised in that awareness.. complete cessation of existence in that moment. All you face is nothingness, and it feels like the bottom has just fallen off whatever one was standing on. It happened a couple of times, years back. A little preview of when you are not in this world anymore. All things Scorpio come easy to me… ability to inflict pain on others… desire to love with abandon, yet not trusting self and another.. overwhelming intensity which has to be kept in check to stop it from being destructive… I feel a need to break free from dramas, yet, they draw me in
and push me to turn everything upside down, until there is nothing left to learn. The bond of Scorpionic preoccupation with digging deep whatever the subject, with creating traumas – needs to be broken. I do not WANT to be touched by this black Scorpio energy again. My lesson here in this world – to be released from it, from that emotional slaughterhouse. My lesson is to kill the intensity, that 100mph drive, and relax into the Taurean serenity of being, to ENJOY life in its simplest form, to enjoy life as is. I have done ENOUGH soul digging in my past, it’s in my blood, circulating through me like a curse.
I am now a kind Fish with an analytical sharp Virgo mind and an indulgent, but adventurous Taurus Moon (thanks, 9th House).. I have an inner strive to be free from psychoanalysis of self and others, to base my life on simple pleasures, which feed and care for the soul, not tear it apart.. I need stability and search for it with determination. Glimpses of that subconscious understanding manifested in my physical life. Yet, I came here, and all was turned upside down, and I allowed myself to be dragged into someone else’s reality, which happened to be the one I am wanting to escape. I can also see that I created an illusion around someone and believed it fully, while there was vacuum on the other side. And I knew it too instinctively, that’s why I left, but stubbornly refused to acknowledge that to myself CONSCIOUSLY. Reading other’s stories on DXP Piscean and Scorpio forums let me see. It allowed me to step outside of me and see it objectively. Funny, how our minds play tricks on us, isn’t it… it is a bitter pill to swallow, but I failed to be realistic and carried away with own version of reality. The subconscious manifestations of my psyche played out in full here, what I didn’t even know I was capable of. I cannot deny this part of me, I embrace it, for in many ways it gives me strength to know that I am not that little thing in the corner, as I perceived myself innately. And that I am not an omnipotent being either, the one I always thought I OUGHT to be… no one out there is. Just… human, like everyone else. A simple
truth. Yet, the lesson remains – to simplify that which once was a labirinth of the mind. “A sense of sacred in the ordinary”.. I am now learning not to attempt acquire it with the Scorpionic tools of control, but a more easy going attitude of letting go. It’s a struggle. And I am not going to drop my highly analytical streak, that’s my asset and my tool, not an enemy, it is what makes me intelligent and capable of grasping things which others
may struggle with.
My mind IS mutable and fluid, why say this to me as an indicator of my weakness? What rubbish. Like telling an apple it tastes of an apple, and not a pear, what a shame on the apple!!! I am an apple among pears (people I spoke to are all fixed signs here) and have no problem with that whatsoever, nothing new to me. I have freedom to feel and follow my own path, according to my unique sense of appleness, not morph into a pear shape. As I was told once “For the millionth time. I am my nature. Which you will never grasp.” I am my nature. And I will do it my way.
Before love of self can happen we need to acknowledge those parts of *I* which may be repulsive and disturbing to us, for without devil there is no God.. Glorification of virtues and Denial of its sins is a destruction of the soul’s wholeness. Those atchetypal emotions are such because they exist in each one of us. They are exemplified through Greek myths and the symbology of religion. The first step to purity is acknowledgement of the filth. I understand that. But this is not done in public.
I was very detached in the last few days, which allowed me to objectively see the bigger picture. And I wish I could maintain that detachment, but today is chokingly emotional, a sense of letting go of everything here and just facing the road on my own. A lot of my energy was misplaced here. Of course it severely deplets those of us who heavily invest their intense emotions in things and people via own delusion. I need to restore the balance of being with myself only, yet I am scared of being with myself now. She is capable of the most frightening inner darkness there is Darkness I am falling into and a sense that I will never come out… I don’t even trust my own ability to heal anymore, old tricks don’t work, and I don’t know any new ones. I am trying to clutch at some hope, trying to find that molecule of sun within me, of some light, of something positive that dwells in me right now… but there is none, there is no point in fooling self. It’s pitch black. I will not exagerate if I say that while other’s emotional turmoil here was never used against them, for me there was made an exception, and anything I say is taken to bits and used in some way to show my incompetencies, weaknesses, my general unfit state to live, you name it… kick them while they are down. A twisted sign of ‘excusivity’. I am very special indeed… as a punchbag. I know I am feeling a bit sorry for myself, it is part of being in the dark. I asked for it, my own doing. If any of the women went to those guys they loved and told them what I am telling now… I wonder if they would have gotten kicked… they would, and I was. Men do not want to deal with female insecurities. So part of that great detachment is – feel it but do not get consumed by it. Control not over feelings, but over their MANIFESTATION. Aka… be a Scorpio. I should have kept all to self. It does feel like a lie and hiding what is truly inside, but hey.. play by the Scorpio rules or be out.
Gatubela… I am asking you not to comment on anything please. Imagine that I died.
Imagine that you died? Well of course I do!!! Nothing wrong with a bit of coldness.
“it would help if you could sometimes detach from your astral existence and how things SHOULD be – and look instead at the reality of how they are. “Do as I say, but do not do as I do”…”
No…this is a limitation of my ability to transform myself. I can intrinsically feel the sincerity in the intangibles because my piscean energy is being used to feel the base or source of ALL things and attempt to surf the “ocean”. I will only build once I am “there”. I can not make the next step of loving compassionately and understandingly, if I just stay with “your” limitations and the things that you are requesting that I do.
Otherwise, it will only bring more illusion. Pisces is the end result of the 12 sun signs combined. So, the sun is there…you just have to feel the energy in the air around you and “ ride it”. Why be a pisces in REALITY when Pisceans have the universe? I know that I may not understand your soul, or its expression, but that does not mean that I have to be “you” either. Why should I be?
I feel lucky when someone decides to be honest with me, and not unlucky when someone disagrees with me. I know that you are trying to get me to see your perspective, but that is not reality to me.
No, I did not answer your questions, because this is not a formal interview…lol. You don´t always answer with your heart, and I do not see it necessary to demand that you “comply”. I just speak what I feel, by saying that yes, the mind is weak. You indicate that your mind is mutable, but you have darkness. What does your mind do about the darkness? It will try to find a way to rationalize it, describe it, communicate it, but not find the true source of transformation of it. If you know all things scorpio, then you know that you can transform your darkness when aligning it with God as it is the same energy. The problem is feeling WHERE exactly to let go and transform. Perhaps it can be felt as “raising your energy”?
I can only try to help, however fishy you get with me. Scorpio is not about knowing how to hurt someone—it is about knowing how to heal. It just won´t turn a blind eye to lies.
“A twisted sign of ‘excusivity’. I am very special indeed… as a punchbag.”
You also punched…so please don´t have amnesia now!!! It is not about punching…winning or loosing…it is about knowing yourself. And no, knowing yourself in humility does not mean that we have to be humble to you. It means that releasing self permits you to feel something BEYOND you.
So I just dissolve into misery and beg myself ‘Please stay the course, please stay with me, do not jump off now, because you will be internally destroyed. STAY WITH ME, FUCK YOU!!!!!!’. Too late. I mean… I am, already. The one person here with an extrememly fragile sense of self worth – has it demolished. Piscean ego is shit at the best of times. Piscean self worth is fragile in most, the ego props it up a bit, so I held on to it as long as I could… NOTHING LEFT now. What I need to LIVE in this life, because unlike others – I never had it – has been taken away What I haven’t had much of in the first place – is gone. Now the Virgin joined in to stoke the fires with all the yapping… I sound composed… ha! while going through rage and kicking pillows, hours and hours of it. That’s me, I want to laugh at myself for being so dramatic, but really… it is dramatic, because I have NOTHING left. I don’t deserve love, there is nothing in me to love. I don’t deserve affection, I am a reflected light. Dead. Like the Moon.. looks all pretty, but doesn’t generate anything of its own, just reflects. What can be such creature worth? Nothing. That’s why I was hated and repulsed here, and I deserve every bit of it.
I don’t know how to rebuild it. It was flailing in the first instance, where does one start? There isn’t anything positive I can say to myself about self or my life or… I don’t know… which could be the starting point, there isn’t one now.. There are no answers, aloneness is complete. so fucking complete. and no, it’s not funny at all. IT’S HORRIFYING. Even my son is scared, I punch pillows and throw them against the wall and I feel like killing.. and it is not fair on him I know, but where does one hide when one is dying? What does it fucking mean ‘raise you energies?’ there is nothing to raise from where I stand. there is not a shred of positive, I am SHIT, CAN YOU HEAR THIS? SHIT. The intensity of this shitness is such that I am afraid to damage something or somebody.. me who NEVER ever been violent in her
life,… what the fuck.. what have i become, this is me, a stranger, i hate what is happening, the pain of being someone else. where is my self control now. my mind doesn’t rationalise anything right now, it is my fucking emotional centre that took over and just goes and goes and goes, and there is no stopping it, and I am afraid of myself now… you would never understand, oh ride the energy? who can ride an ocean storm peacefully show me that person. I want to kill him for giving me this pain… and I hate him and love him at the same time, and the range of emotions is just overwhelming anger, rage, jealousy, revenge, where does it all come from.. where is ANYTHING in there that could save me from the hell of the Underworld, where is anything to raise from, just a stump of what once was a person. yeah, laugh at this velvety purple filth and blood everywhere, and maybe I am a psychopath, i certainly am now if i wasn’t before… welcome to my new world.. there is no perspective in there, just raw undiluted emotion of a stupid stupid woman who lives in fairy lands fucking mermaid. what is beyond that, but more pain and more torture, the lifetime of it. this is not love, love cannot be about pain only, love is alos joy, there was never joy, only bleeding… and oh the things I want to do to him would make people step away in horror and amusement, they are that perverse and that OTT. let it be, let it ride, nothing last forever, remember, just this moment in time, and it is not a pretty moment, but it is honest and grim and filthy and what release there is, I don’t know, i release grief and poison and where is love? where is love
Oh…I feel I am missing something….
maybe love is how you express it? Where you feel your soul the most? You probably don´t express it with words…???
Sometimes you can dive, but there is not enough water…and Taurus wants to buy things and see the beauty of the “material”….
There is a hidden art and history in the shallow pools of water…you grasp at anything you can find in hell…and when water is scarce, you feel your soul.
Then…transformation through how you express love.
Again…I am probably out to lunch.
I feel my soul the most when I give without expectation. I know this because when I worked in the neuro… when sessions went well, and I
saw happy eyes – it gave me an unbelievable sense of satisfaction and happiness. It wasn’t about money, money was crap. It was about them.
A friend of mine said recently ‘We were not even talking about you, and G. suddenly said ‘I miss Ines’ It has been nearly a year since I left. People feel when what’s given to them is selfless.
Words are not needed when love is present, not for me. No, I am not good at verbal public expression and singing praises.I manifest it in countless other ways, physically, emotionally, materially. Scorpio men are accused of hot and cold.. When a Scorpio man truly loves, there is NONE of that. When I love – the person will never be left in doubt.
Love expression is not about giving the person my best self. Love is expressing it in such a way that he feels and becomes HIS best self.
Instead… I brought out Hades in both.
There is much more to grasp in my hell than I thought possible. I feel such inexplicable sadness right now.
” I want to kill him for giving me this pain… and I hate him and love him at the same time, and the range of emotions is just overwhelming anger, rage, jealousy, revenge, where does it all come from..”
I didn’t give you pain. You are always what you think. And what you think is a reflection of how you perceive. Love from the heart is an intelligence. Whereas trying to love from the intellect only, is a pathway to sorrow and self-pity. Your inner-life is your creation of you, and what seeds you have allowed outside of you that create you.
Women will always experience a huge hole of love, then blame it on me (or male Scorpio) because they absolutely resist change to their ego constructs of what life means. Knowing change is feeling for the Source of all joy and crises happening to us. Knowing we are not alone when we commune with a force infinitely greater than our own ego prison. The world of human frailty revolves around a persons ego myth.
From babies out of the womb, and to our physical death– we are all alone. A relationship with the Source gives us peace, because to know the higher mind of God, we have become, through lessons learned in crisis, conflict and infliction.
We have learned that the initiation of these feelings is the change. Surrendering to a force which you do not control. And a surrender of the ego-will to change, versus maintaining an iron grip on what is known.
As I’ve said repeatedly, we will never know real love if we are angry and denying the presence of love when it’s apparent. Self-love is developed with focus and expansive reception of what makes us grow.
If we are not growing, we are not individuated as A SPIRIT. Not an intellect. Very important. We give power to another person because we have no connection to A FEELING beyond our tiny insignificance.
Consciousness is God. Awareness of that power is located in the heart. The heart loves naturally from this place. But love must be created through knowledge in the valley of death. Any pretenses of love shown without the intimate knowledge discovered through ego-death-illusion, is A CHOICE to not grow with the maker. But to look “right” alone.
Life is not fair. The sooner people accept this basic principle, the sooner they can heal and discriminate what enters their consciousness. .
I don’t blame anything on you. I know you didn’t give me pain. I am the Source of my own pain and joy. You gave me what I needed, not what I wanted, and that discovery gave me pain. The conjured mind illusion which led me up the garden path.
Every emotion has a virtue of discovering one’s soul in it. I have a bunch to examine. I just don’t know how to live without feeling, and feeling intensely. Intensity is another side of indifference, too much of it, and one is in a swamp. I guess I am afraid of indifference in anything more than I am of being in a swamp. Where is the divine balance..
I am sorry for what happened.
And I’m sorry too for calling you names. I can forgive anyone, but it’s true that I never forget;)
Ditto
{{Eagle}}
This guy has truth to offer. But…He’s even more of an idealist than I, in that he doesn’t acknowledge the stark reality among our existence of human poverty, it’s blatant corruption and slavery of others, it’s sexual abuse, it’s inter-personal deceit… and the subconscious deeds manifested by man like violence, political control and food-chain dominance. That is the real world, to me.
He’s more or less speaking of a world, us (humans) which “could be”… but as a community having experienced differences here as an example, it is not realistic to expect, as he assumes in his talk, (possibly to sell his books?) that humans should (or can) be their own counsel in life and death times. Humans are… from the ideals he is conveying… suppose to just be as enlightened as he is. Although he is a progressive soul. This world of people and their dire means to survive and strive for greed riddled motivations, in deep occult realms, exists darkness, to me. He however… unlike me, does not admit the presence of the human Shadow in everybody– the nature of our Underworld.
Still, there’s higher minded principles from him I’d like you guys to listen to.
The video may crash here… just an idea if possible, maybe we need this forum formatted into sequenced pages so it can handle all the material.
Anyway he’s speaks for about an hour over 6 parts, so if you’re interested search “Dr Wayne Dyer no-limits” on Youtube;)
Yay! I have also noticed problems loading.
There is still so much to say and share!
BEING… love. That is not just words or artificial expression… is it Gatubela?
And ETHICS… instead of Rules.
When I respond to manipulation and twisted games by people who have deep hidden intent… I know they are playing by a set of intellectual “rules” which is who they are as a by-product of their conditioning among the “rules” hammered into them by the herd.
Most human beings on earth with their personalities are NOT BEING. They are “doing”. They are “thinking”. Their personality is not the essence of who they are. Their personality is a front. It is a mask, in order to adapt into a world of survival through relational surface politics and pure self-interest as the primary motivation. So pure self-interest, is not our essence. Sending love is our essence. Emitting peace is our essence.
If people cannot grasp this powerful energy, I challenge you to look closely at babies and young children. Watch their relationship to you and other children. What energy do they permeate? THEY ARE LOVE. They ARE TRUTH. Even through silence children are truthful. Because toddlers and children PERCEIVE the greatness of our essence. Ego and self-fiction is not who they ‘naturally’ are.
Yet when people grow into an adult body, that does not mean people maintain the essence of the inquisitive child within. Instead, ego and self-importance attached to collective perceptions, fictions and feelings in a material-status world, people become inadequate of their once immortal essence of the child. People then “believe” in a false-self which competes with the superficiality of the superficial environment.
BEING comes from giving and expressing from an individuated center. In contrast… Obeying vicarious rules which people have no clue WHY or WHAT those rules mean, people then obey inherited rules which have no bearing on who they naturally are.
So when I speak of sincerity and intent here by people, I know that if one is not coming from love, an authenticity, they are game players in life. And the game is real to superficial masses. My response to that twisted is a manifestation of justice, to bring ‘the real-ating’ back into balance and integrity.
Ask yourself. If BEING honesty is not important you, and receiving honesty is not important to you…. then WHY are you attached to NEEDING approval. That game will never create happiness in ones life. Nobody is a lovable truth from that false place.
I have continuously sent the affection of a toddler here in writing. Being lovable folks, is being the truth and love a child. Being the integrity and purity of a child’s mind.
As we have witnessed, any hint to manipulate my essence so I behave the way you want me to behave, and to think the way you want me to think, and to express the way I am “supposed” to express– because of society’s **Rules, remember?**… my essence and nature will transform those obedient baaah rules.
We have all seen (perceived) the outcome. The verb of essence.;)
“…If people cannot grasp this powerful energy, I challenge you to look closely at babies and young children. Watch their relationship to you and other children. What energy do they permeate? THEY ARE LOVE. They ARE TRUTH. Even through silence children are truthful. Because toddlers and children PERCEIVE the greatness of our essence..”
And the instinctual nature of humans to have babies, to procreate, is for what purpose? Why do humans feel the “gift” of making offspring????
Men and women produce children because OF THE HAPPINESS AND JOY AND MEANING they pour into the parents lives.
The essence of their kids, metaphorically… brings the parents or family unit feelings and discoveries– ‘back to the source within themselves’… the source of what you ask??
The source of—>> happiness, joy, peace and truth. LIGHT.
Light which has been sucked from them in their ignorance as adults.;)
“BEING… love. That is not just words or artificial expression… is it Gatubela?”
Darn it…another question…not again!
Well…love is much more than that.
I don´t feel that love is just light. Scorpio feels that love comes from the soul, once we work on our negativity. So…love for me, is the light in the dark. It is as you say, but do people really feel it?
It is like a second being in our own bodies…it lies there, dormant and we are not aware of it. When we quiet our minds, we can begin to see it. I guess it is the soul. And the soul is not this beam of white light..only that what it manifests or creates, once liberated, is white.
Light is the result of this soulful darkness….
Light on its own, is the mental arena where anything goes…
I know it seems that it is in the heart…but the heart knows that it can not be sustained without the balance of dark – light .
This soulful darkness is nestled in the heart…and it is love. From there, I guess only light will be shone.
Anyways…If I remember my darkness, it just makes me want to die…How does one eliminate that? It is not through being honest…truthful and loving…because I have tried that. But it is still there. I don´t feel like I am running from my own fears…because they were not imagined. They were real.
How do you heal when the truth hurts so bad?
“But it is still there. I don´t feel like I am running from my own fears…because they were not imagined. They were real. How do you heal when the truth hurts so bad?”
I keep thinking about this, it evoked feelings in me… you know, I may be just a bit luckier than some people, because I disconnect. It doesn’ mean I do not remember what feelings and thoughts were there at the moment of any dark experience.. oh I do. But there is a great wide canyon between me and what once was. It is not what defines me now. I don’t know how I do it. I accepted what was, and moved on. Granted, in the past I not always learned from it, but I do now.
Pain… the truth of our choices, of what we were- was the truth AT THAT TIME. We never really betray ourselves, we do the best we can as felt true to us then, even if is doesn’t look as the right choice from the distance of time. Acceptance of that truth AS IT WAS THEN..
I can’t ask myself would I change anything, this is a way of dragging self back into the darkness, of saying ‘You’ve made the wrong choices’. No. They were right, because they were and are part of your life history. History is never wrong, it just is.
I’ve accepted a lot of things in the last week, both from my past and from the present. I don’t know how… it just happened.. I wish I could just pass this over to others.
Self worth and manifestations of its lack
I never thought of myself as vain, and in many ways I am not. But there is a specific area, at closer inspection, where I have a very complicated relationship with vanity. And what is below let me see that vanity exists in all of us, but manifests in different areas for each.
I am intelligent. I am more intelligent than most people around me. I can hold my own in a conversation with anyone, from a beggar in the street to a University professor. I haven’t always recognised it, but certainly in the last so many years. It happened when I saw that people I considered extremely smart, smarter than me – showed that they looked up to me for knowledge and solutions. Again, I learn through others.. in the absence of Piscean self awareness it came as a surprise. Then I noticed myself bursting with desire to show that I know this and know how… It goes like this… a subject is discussed… most people possibly have very scant knowledge if it. I know quite a bit about it and not just that, I understand it from my heart…. I jump in with that, but there is no real desire to give or share. There is vain desire to showcase myself. Even here… I asked cMac a few months back to split the Forum into pages. I see someone else asking that and think to myself ‘I thought of it ages ago’… And it goes on and on… I saw this video… I read this book.. I KNOW this already… Who bloody cares? Vain and stupid and no heart.
I take it deeper and see that it’s hiding my lack of self worth (lack of? Absence.)… I’ve found a way of substituting my inner strength for the strength of opinions = outer intelligence. It also manifests in the fact that despite my intelligence my outer achievements are far and few in between. Scorp No.2 (he was shrewd) said ‘Intelligent as you… there is always a price to pay for it’. I know what he meant. The price is the conflict between mind and heart, an inner turmoil.. He was that way too.
I have to hold myself back in many ways, a torture to be bursting inside. My head… my mind is my biggest asset. I am not conventionally beautiful, I have taste and a subtle sex appeal that is picked up on, but mostly it is when I open my mouth that I become noticible.. men are intrigued, often intimidated. Because I am not a Barbi doll? I guess I learned from that subconsciously and began to use it as a way of sucking up others’ admiration to feed the sense of self worth, yet always hating compliments for they confirm only one truth – the power of self given away to others.
Intellectual narcissism, where the mind is disconnected from the heart, and the knowledge then is self serving, no greater good can come out of it. A person with the heart does not feel the need to show off, they simply share. I do not share freely. I display it as a peacock displays its feathers.
My heart.. my heart, I have a heart, and I have none.. My mind knows my self worth, and my heart does not accept it. I understand now what is happening… the turmoil of accepting own humanity and knowing I have to live with it, my highly idealistic self is struggling with facing own filth… my ephemeral being is stuck in a dungeon with self. I never met her before, and here she is, far from ideal, a curiosity, so not like others, and so much like them… She is a human alien right now. I am alone with myself, there is no choice but to accept her, and I don’t know yet how to begin to love her. I have no heart for her.
THIS here is my lake surface. Like Narcissus I am looking into self from outside, with a view of discovering and embracing her. I felt that may be even writing here is feeding into the Narcissist habits. But denying self expression for me personally would be shoving everything into the dark corner of my mind and shutting the door. I need that lake surface to see, to learn through loving others, because the depth that I was looking for in others – what never found elsewhere, but here. Yet, I feel a genuine discomfort from the conflict of being selfish (being here, but burdening others) and being selfless (going, but losing a path to self discovery). A discomfort from taking, and not giving back. A glimpse of what it’s like to truly feel for and consider others. 7th house.
I feel that death takes different forms for people, its expression, personal demons, the way we deal with the pain of confronting them.. But the pain it brings is the same for everyone. The truth hurts, it hurts so much.
I want to tell you..
One time when I said of observing you as a kid was when I meant that your youthful spirit is felt and appreciated. You misunderstood it.
Doesn’t matter. I am in a space of great exploration right now, it fills me with tears at times, and sometimes it is wonderous. I walk between your soul and mine, back and forth, to observe feelings and emotions which it evokes in me. It is the only way for me to learn. It is a maze, a complicated pattern, for my reactions reflect the complexity of you. What’s new is that my boundless, no barriers soul sees the value in having boundaries, suddenly there is a sense that the mysteries of another sometimes need to remain just that – mysteries. Wanting to understand every little detail is a form of control as well, but not everything should be unveiled, there is wisdom in letting the soul wonder.
Ego is an opportunist. It reminds of its existence many times a day. I cannot fight it, what we resist… Instead I observe it wanting to jump into action, I say ‘Here you are again’, preventing it from gaining ground, taking it to the point of nothingness. It’s hard, it feels like an exorsism of the soul.
I spoke to my mum, and it was relating on the level I always wanted. I told her about vanity, and the lessons I am learning. Being brought up outside of any religious/spritual tradition, my mum’s understanding is eclectic, taken from reading, her own observations of life and her experiences. But boy the connection was suddenly established… My Gemini mum dropped her frivolity and dismissive attitude and told me about her vanity and her search and the lessons she got from her parents in the times when no one could teach about virtue and real values. And we connected, and through that I connected to my past in the form of my grand parents whom I didn’t know well, because of thousands of miles between us.. and the understanding of me as a result of countless lives before me, their decisions, sufferings, joys, their lives which make me a small part in the big puzzle of life. And this is the woman I want to know, not the shallow manifestation of ‘You dig too much’. I felt at peace afterwards, and grateful for having reached out and for having found a rich and meaningful soul within someone I thought of as… my mum only.
This a true story… A couple once had an extremely bad dispute, and the man went home and wrote her a nasty thoughtless letter. It was written in anger, in the heat of the experience, he posted it and then immediately regretted it. He called her to let her know that a letter will arrive from him, and would she please bin it without opening it. She told him later that it arrived, and she was tortured by curiosity, but torn it and placed it in the bin. She could see his writing in the bits of paper, and it was overwhelmingly tempting to put it back together and read. She never did. When he learned of that he felt that the bond between them had just become unbroken, and their relationship went from strength to strength.
To me she chose to overlook his immediate soul manifestation in the form of anger and hurt, and honour that which she truly loved in him – his soulful core. She contained her power through choosing to preserve his. And I read that and understood that I chose to read your letter, instead of placing it in the bin.
Thank you for these meaningful gifts.
I loved that story…
For me, it is a deeper knowledge….
Today is not forever if there is anger, harshness…negativity…then words are not eternal…He is important…because the ALL of him was not “that one incident”. The option of transforming that was still available.
All of these present moments could be transformed….
Its like the PRESENT has a different perspective when you feel love…it gets more and more eternal…
I have to accept that being alone is part of life’s journey. The desire to merge with a force greater than me has haunted me from my childhood, but I never knew what that ‘greater’ is. It’s in me, but a shocking discovery. My solitude has been for many years. I am not hiding from others, but those periods of aloneness are precious and so needed, I can disappear for days at a time, when no one is aware of where and what I am up to… As my friend says now ‘She will come back when she is ready’…
Pisces energy is unstable, akin to a tide… it comes in big waves so potent one cannot stop, and then recedes leaving one exhausted. And now… I am so FRUSTRATED, and it is again to the point where I want to scream and kick and kill, but myself now…surrender… fuck that when, how am I going to know when I AM NOT? there is no path to it, there is no ‘technique’ there is nothing that can bring it on.. there nothing TO DO, it is, and I fucking KNOW what it is, I don’t know how but I do… it happened before, I was not ‘I’, I was BEING, and it’s not anymore, those precious moments in this life when ‘I’ didn’t exist, and I know it was also in the past… I know TOO MUCH, I understand TOO MUCH, this is a barrier to – FEEL IT. To become VOID. To surrender, and then there is no question to be answered ‘Who am I/’, the question becomes meaningless… what the fuck… do I have to ask someone to put a fully loaded gun to my head, so that I could give up and let all go and dissolve into this divine nothingness? Even writing this is my ego writing, it WANTS own death, and there is no path.. I am so damaged… it happenes to a tiny minority, out of some fucking sheer luck brough on by the misery of their living… and my living is far from great, but what is it that’s missing, that keeps the door closed, and I cry from facing the closed door. Go back and live like the rest, accept that the search of it, all that you have laways wanted, that great communion with the Force
greater than you – is not going to happen, nothing will take you there, you are you, the mind which knows, the gut that knows, but there is
something missing. This pain is debilitating, it doesn’t let me fucking LIVE right now, I have become dysfunctional. it’s a torture… like reaching an orgasm and never quite getting there I don’t know how to describe this pregnant state.. is it time? is it patience? is it falling off a cliff and not dying miraculously? Do i have to look for every dangerous situation out there to place myself into? WHAT DOES IT TAKE?
I have no answers, I have no solutions, I have nothing to go on… I DON’T WANT TO GO BACK!!! and I cannot go forward, a brick wall, oh I
know too much and I know nothing, no thing, no thing, wanting to be is ego, even wanting to be a no thing is ego, fuck her. she is dangerous, because she lives forever, that illusion of ‘self’, yet the veneration of self, because that fucking Piscean Sea of Consciousness is her birthright, but she forsaken it, and she wants to go back there and she can’t… because knowing self COMES FROM that conscious state..Imagine the pain of a woman who cannot give birth, she suffers for hours, days, months, it
doesn’t happen. I was physically born in that state of – ‘not wanting to come out’, my mum suffered. Is that the price to pay now, in real life? Wanting, but unable to be born?
I have never known I will find torment in desire to dissolve. Desire… may be that is it… part of why it doesn’t happen. The nature of desire, whatever it is.. one’s personality finds a way to desire something… a person, a thing, a cause… fuck, I attach again to something, a cause… it’s a catch 22, wanting to become free, yet findidng attachment to the cause of wanting to become free… how ridiculous, and I am going crazy now, in the same way I used to go crazy as a child thinking about the infinity of space. The mind simply ceased, and I had to pull myself out of it, like falling into a never ending pit.
I can’t be here anymore, it’s gone beyond here, beyond what is possible to discuss, beyond everything I know. I am alone.
Breathe in …. and breath out. Focus on your breath only and nothing else. Feel it enter your body as you inhale and leave your body as you exhale.
The air in your breath…let the air of your mind focus on it. This air, is the tides of the ocean…and the sound of the waves pounding…Its air…so the mind might surrender a bit.
Cosmic air is different than mental air….Relax into it and let go.
ummmm…you might feel a bit sexy one hour into it..
LoL…
Hugs.
… to me sadness (hole, void, whatever else it’s called) may be just a natural part of (my) soulful condition, the one that never really goes away, because the light and the dark hardly ever balance each other, causing me to question and feel beyond surface emotions. What is anger, rage, resentment? A soul’s prompt to see where I flopped at any given moment in time. And we do flop, don’t we? What was missing in my light that gave me the darkness? They are One Source. Sadness follows those moments of outwardly manifested emotions, always.. To love is to recognise the flow of own humanity within self and other, and accept its realness. May be healing comes from observance and acceptance of this struggle.. of its permanence. I don’t know.
so the hole… mother nature divided us into yin and yang for a reason.. I feel that babies and young children (to age 7 or 8) escape the wrath of that division… YET… because their bodies are still in formation, the powerful Kundalini energies are yet to enter into the errosion process which will eventually touch the psyche through complex feelings.. the innocence of a puppy gone.
I don’t feel like talking much anymore..
Gatubela… thank you for being who you are. If you ever want to talk – my e-mail is somewhere up there.
Love
Ines
Gatubela,
I am doing a short presentation for my college course tomorrow… choice of a book to do with counselling. I chose Thomas Moore ‘Care of the Soul’… just exactly what is being discussed here.
“Care of the soul speaks to the longings we feel and to the symptoms that drive us crazy, but it is not a path away from shadow or death. A soulful personality is complicated, multifaceted, and shaped by both pain and pleasure. Life lived soulfully is not without its moments of darkness and periods of foolishness. Dropping the salvational fantasy frees us up to the possibility of self knowledge and self acceptance, which are the very foundation of the soul”.
It spoke to me on so many deep levels that I keep it with me. It’s about taking every event in life as something of precious value to teach us: depression, divorce, break up, loss of job, illness, the list is endless… all taking us to the depth of own being and urging us to learn and to take those lessons into the future, without remorse. He talks through great writers of Renaissance , mythology, Jung and his own counselling practice. That story I told you – was from that book.
It taught me so much, just cannot put value on it.
http://www.harpercollins.com/browseinside/index.aspx?isbn13=9781559946032
Hug
Hi Ines,
I looked at it…I love the mythy part of it…it makes me dream and imagine things….
You know, great intellect and logic is also part of the divine “collective” energy (for lack of a better word)…
Putting images and symbols for psychology…I will have to feel that a bit more…When people are “in need” symbols have a way of having the truth surface up from them.
“It is not through being honest…truthful and loving…because I have tried that. But it is still there. I don´t feel like I am running from my own fears…because they were not imagined. They were real. “How do you heal when the truth hurts so bad?”
A deep seated acceptance is the first inward perception. All events are lessons. So lessons of all extremes and subtleties are to be celebrated, if we want a fulfilling experience in life. I understand your past traumas, I have them too… but that is not your being, they are not my being.
I have never suggested your past and my past and other women’s past “were not real”. If we are in states of beingness through the love from the Source, our emotional willpower and our perceptive acuteness is strong enough to move FORWARD from what has happened to us in the past. Those events were pages in our lives, they were happenings. Dark periods in our life are not defining results, or absolutes, of who we are. What we are, is spirit. Living through spirit. Traumas are the traps of mans world– the intellect. The intellect is THE LIMITATION. Intellect immobilized in material earth perception. Not divine perception and feeling. We never deny to ourselves that experiences have happened to us in our past. We are simply learning (knowledge for the sake of knowledge) something from that past, by profoundly transforming the depth-perception of our current states, in each breath.
You see, regardless of what extreme events have affected us in the past, those events ARE TEACHERS, whispering to us that all of it is a blessing. Blessings for greater horizons as human–beings. Not as human doers, Not as human thinker, And not as human perceivers. Humans perceive limitation. The might of divinity perceives greatness felt through our essence, by being in the present. Through beingness, the experiences of our lives… are never permanently fixated in the mind. This is a very important idea we must soak in. To move forward through mind-soul-heart—> we must slay the demons of the past and ACCEPT the truth of what was, before we can “Be” in the state of impermanence flowing through us the present breath.
If we subconsciously choose to re-live past experiences in our current lives… and define them as our limit, we are in a space of unconscious stagnation. Which most people are in their entire life. A place of doubt and fear from that past is all we are, defined by mortal perception. Because our souls have not accepted the transition of LESSONS initiated within ourselves. “Celebrate the lessons”, as Wayne Dyer says. Again, lessons have to be transformed through the ecology of the emotional mind.
If we are using the past traumas of our lives as the “cop out” for not getting on with the fulfillment that we truly want, we do not change within. We stay safe, paradoxically consumed in fears in our past during our present which keep us comfortable. If we can’t see the lessons of everything in the patterns of our lives (our thought-perception), we are not willing to associate within a present and future energy we could create. We are stuck behind bars in our conceived mental prison. As a result our intellects are transfixed on a past which we can never change.
Life is about advancing the inner worlds. But here’s the awakening– we are never ‘powerless’ to change the present. Whatever circumstances arise, enjoy all of it. Our present, what we feel for it, is everything in terms of possibility and moving forward psycho-emotionally. Perceptively.
You have experienced the dark Gatubela, now don’t allow the dark to swallow your dreams and creative gifts in place of a happier present and future. You always have the power, the choice, to slay your fears through progress, or you can choose to let your fears beguile you until your last days here on earth.
I have moved forward through the valley of death. Maybe everyone was not given those gifts to intrinsically transform through their inner worlds.
You are love Gatubela, that’s all you truly need in existence. All women through my existence, are the light, the essence of loveness. In contrast… I don’t feel or perceive women as love energy when they think and behave with the attitudes of men. Men are the initiators of all disease in this world. The key is to know when that limited intellect is affecting your development.
Well…it is getting harder to balance feminine love and the fact that I have to be “more”. Meaning, women actually have to incorporate masculine energies in their lives. I guess it gets too much, when they choose to LOVE through feeling like they are more assertive, stronger or charming than what men essentially need to feel from a woman…
I am just guessing here…LoL…I am not guy.
My existance however, does not depend on love. Actually, love is the reason I get into trouble!!! My existance is more likely to be threatened through manifesting love enegies, over here.
“Well…it is getting harder to balance feminine love and the fact that I have to be “more”. Meaning, women actually have to incorporate masculine energies in their lives..”
Yes of course women incorporate masculine rationality and decisiveness through their love-life. That is fine. As I’ve shared a few years back, all men and women are born with both masculine and feminine energy. The questions of interest are… To what degree?… Are humans, again… “Being”… within balance and consciousness of their inner states and their sexual desires?
The reality is, of course they are not. As the old cliche people brush off and say to squirm out of perceptive truth and growth… “well nobody’s perfect!” ..hahaha. And it’s true. Humans are fragile, they’re confused, blind hungry creatures.
Yes you’re not a guy Gatubela. That is true… because I know what specific things exist deep within your mind. Even though you have a shadow existing within you, as all of us do, you are able to “be” the Leo and Sagittarius archetypal energies of play-expression (Leo) and expansive higher-learning (Sagittarius). So not much of your psychological NATURE is of a Scorpionic origin. But you still have the gifts of awareness, the broader intuitive social capacity to ‘understand’ (Sag) what goodies I am sending through the written word.
You would probably understand the classic Pluto/Sun/Mars/Uranus/Venus person one hundred times better by observing their mannerisms and motivations and mindset through their seeing their body language and behavior.
Through my eyes, I have always seen you as a woman with brave innocence, because as mentioned above… your nature Gatubela… is not OF my nature. Which is beautiful. You are you and that’s what makes me enjoy communicating with you.
To me, a woman should speak her mind when she has a gripe. Male Scorpio doesn’t mind read. A gripe is not unhealthy or unnatural. However… in my intimate experiences with the feminine sexual essence… when a woman is withdrawn, upset, muddled and mystified… SHE DOES NOT KNOW, nor understand “the origins” of her fear and frustration.
She never does.
That…… is the bunny feminine.
I am here to demystify her windows. That’s what male Scorpio can give a gal and a whole lot more. If she would allow him.
“That’s what male Scorpio can give a gal and a whole lot more. If she would allow him.”
Strange how that goes…that is a very magical statement.
If a woman allows male scorpio to “give it to her”…(hahaha!) it means that she proceeds to kill her own ego. She kills all illusion in her life as her energy gravitates to his….Each layer is shed in order “to see him”…and “feel him”…while at the same time, grounding her energies and not loosing her own essence.
Because that is exactly what he needs to feel. And his essence, is exactly what her soul yearns for as well.
Anyways, I understand that these things also are indicated by certain things in the astrological chart…
“To me, a woman should speak her mind when she has a gripe. ”
In spanish, “gripe” means that she has a cold!
No…I do not always speak my “mind” or heart or soul.
I keep a part of me dormant…
Its like half of me knows the truth, and the other half knows if it can be built on. If I can´t match the two, then the other half remains unexplored territory.
Gatubela,
We are not men. In fact, I have no cardinal signs in my chart at all, those which manifest masculine energies. I am pretty much all woman LOL. For me love is not all women need to be, out there it’s much more complex than soulful manifestations of our true essense. We need the masculine in us, which is where I struggle, that outward manifestation of my dreams and goals… I felt how do I balance those? Well, as you say it is a problem. If I state my point lovingly and also lovingly explain why – it gets dismissed most of the time. I know that deep down it is taken on board somehow, but the result of the action still becomes based on the ego of those involved. I do not want to be right, I want SOLUTIONS to the problems. But people do not operate on that level at all. There is so much at stake for people to lose in their own little attempts to survive. So… love is not all, although all is Love. It is sad.
The word ‘psyche’ means ‘soul’ in Greek. Psychology is ‘word about soul’. Not the existing version which separates everything into ‘conditions’, but what once was, a couple of hundred years back and before. It has been distorted through the industrial progress, through labour specialisation, which took us to factories and away from community living where people are able to relate to one another on a much deeper level. The priest once was the Caretaker of the Soul in his parish. Religion systematically failed to convey the true meaning behind its message through own dogmatic intolerance… there was no love there, but an establishment of the church as a social insitution, rather than a soulful movement. Even the great Eastern traditions are not free from the hypocricy of own dogmatic teachings. The primary function of religion – care of the human soul – has been abolished and given to a medical psychology model. Which doesn’t speak to our inner beings on any meaningful level. Here, take the pill for your depression, that will cure ya… What!??
My battles here have made me much more assertive in the outer world. I feel that the energy exchange here let me rearrange my masculine in
such a way that it may become a supportive force in my being, rather than destruction through an egotistic expression of my FEMININE nature. Love, too, needs expression, and therefore, THE WILL to express and manifest = masculine. I find it fascinating how in astrology those male/female energies are interspersed one after another on the Zodiac: assertive male Aries followed by sensual and peace loving Taurus, followed by mentally alert male Gemini etc. etc. We are all those, but lack somewhere in their abundance. Perhaps, when we meet the soulmate – we meet the energy which blends in with that which we have already, as a completion. So for me… yes, we are alone, but we have THE GREAT VOID of that energy. The lack of. Yin/Yang, the need for completion. And so people search for love, whichever way they understand it, a ‘love instinct’ I call it. In my case it always manifested as being drawn to dominant males, haha… As it STANDS NOW – I don’t know if I am able to complete the great circle of yin/yang (or the Zodiac wheel) within me, through my inner resorces. The future will tell. I don’t want to compete with men, and if a man fails to see into my essense – not my loss. In real life they usually want to protect me, must be all that oestrogen flowing through me LOL. I appreciate that, but really… I have been protecting myself for a long time now, good or bad. I will plough on, in the way it feels true for me.
I had my presentation. I did it from my heart. I saw that it touched people, made them think outside of their little box. That’s all I wanted.
A presentation from the heart…yay!
It has a different effect when people see your sincerity! It is like a catalyst to the mundane, salary slaughtering activities we do! If people were bored before, they become interested. If they learned slowly before, then it speeds it up…and it even makes them believe the impossible!
Scorpio has the sincerity as well…but sometimes, it comes out in just a “yes” or “no”… and the “look”…… as the other person tries to figure out “what really was said” was being spoken to their inner dimensions.
I have spent the last 2 days near the desert and ocean. Its the first time that I walked alone on a beach…until late at night. Daring for me, as I was in a strange city with hotel almost an hour away!!! I never go out when travelling due to the fact that my children were taken away from me, when I was on a trip. It was like I had to always be available by telephone or ready to fly back when needed! These habits are so ingrained in me, that I don´t even eat for a day…my nerves are really that wrecked!
I think however, it was the ocean that just made me feel peace inside. Hypnotic too…like something about the night, the wind, and the waves pounding the rocks…..it also calmed my heart down.
A man wanting to protect is a very beautiful thing….I did not feel that part with my relationships and by the time someone really wanted to protect me, I had already been used to protecting myself.
Ex in facebook posts these pictures of women who have serpents all over them…on their private parts…or dark angel wings tattooed on their entire backs….he also posts women with tattoos of a serpent on her back – a black serpent. I feel this energy very strongly in me…and it is hard to understand men and their sexuality, when this energy knows the “nothing” it can do, when the heart is not open. It is one of the reasons I struggle so much to listen to heart. It just felt that all of these energies have a divine use, even the “negative ones”….through balance and love.
Strange that you mention that kundalini energy…for some reason it caught my attention.
It is the opening of the chakras, right?
Welll..people do search for love as they understand it..but when this dark energy is used, love takes on a completely different meaning.
It just connects every atom in your being to your will and soul…and the universe listens…nothing stops you in your mission to love and protect. People don´t understand how you got the strength…why you are acting irrationally…or how the heck you can be so calm and “not die”… (in my case, literally…LoL)
So, a man who wants to protect , under these circumstances, will be a powerful soul working through the divine.
Hmmm… serpents on their private parts… that’s Kundalini energy, the Life Force, the sexual energy which makes the world go around. It is depicted as a coiled serpent at the base of the sacral chakra. The build up towards an orgasm, but if it manifests in a non sexual situation – it is very powerful, with ALL chakras opening.. the effects can be devastating… or leading to a state of bliss and an enligntenment. No, really… there aren’t many people who experienced it truly, through non sex (like Krishnamurti or Osho). From what I understand it cannot be achieved through an orgasm. Perhaps, that’s the reason why the Eastern teachings do not advocate sexual activities other than for the purposes of procreation. Celibacy then becomes a prerequisite to achieving one’s Union with the Soul.
So… take you pick, orgasm or a vague possibility of true enlightenment LOL. I laugh, but I would love to have gone there… the true surrender, not just through the mind, but through the entire PHYSICAL being. I feel that the state of bliss I experienced was not the full chakra opening, partial. Orgasmic states are energy depleting, so this constant drive on people (men specifically) to have as much fuck as possible is totaly counterproductive *sigh*
I am also ‘sawing the holes’ in what psychological understanding there is. You know there is a condition called ‘Depersonalisation disorder’? It is included in the index of mental disorders, but here is the thing.. the symptoms are exactly that of an enlightenment state: out of body experience, bliss like state, detachment, difficulties in recognising self as a separate entity and recognising features of the environment etc. in other words, disassociation with what’s out there and a sense of self… facsinating stuff for me. Can you imagine now if a person was never AWARE of any spiritual aspects and suddenly goes through spontaneous Kundalini awakenining, how FRIGHTENING that must feel because the symptoms can be also physically painful and psychologically disorientating? They wouldn’t know what’s hit them.
Since I am on that subject… Men are driven by sexual desire so physically intense it can kidnap the entire thought process in the direction of ‘fuck’. That fleeting perception of a woman in a crowd may trigger an involuntary, totally instinctive response… one face (shoulder, hair, waistline, legs, eyes, whatever, could be anything)… that response may follow a guy around like a mist, the whole day. She is gone, she was a stranger on a bus, or a shopper in a mall… but it lingers, comes back, and depending on how strong it was initially… the desire haunts… Well, I have a couple of male, non romantic friends, with whom we have extremely open discussions. We
learn from each other, in non sexual way:) I can relate to that, from how I experience sexual energies and their intensity. I respect the nature of male desire, but would you feel it’s essentially the same force that flows through women? I am not sure.
Yes, this energy does damage in the real world of humans, so much damage… when it could be so beautiful, a path to higher states of Consciousness.
Your ex sounds like a really troubled soul. Tortured.
x
Just found this… these are experiences of people who had spontaneous Kundalini awakening. It is scary and fascinating at the same time. Not the energy to play with.
This, Gatubela, is what I was talking about when I said ‘What does it take?’ What does it take to arrive at that TRUE state, not through mental process, but a REAL awakening.
http://www.kundalini-gateway.org/awaken/index.html
I feel that his subconscious knows what really happened ….. He also posts a lot of cats too…
But actually, it is two serpents, not just one. The ability to choose between them is based on knowing cosmic laws and alot of loosing ego.
There are two pillars – perhaps symbolically seen as black and white…or dark and light…but it is two.
Geez…yes…it does feel very sexual…but not orgasmic. In many cases, the sexual energy is not mine per se. Which is why I always give back. Attempting to give back in the same measure it is being given is a bit hard too. Leo women are not mind readers either!
The heart feeling vulnerable is painful…I actually had severe cardiac symptoms…but medically, there was nothing wrong with me.
The unsettled icky feeling is actually the valley of light I was mentioning previously in the forum. You learn to love under ALL circumstances. When the energy does not flow…is when you begin to feel karmic bonds. You begin to instinctively feel what it is you have to learn…because the heart is something that searches..it is a seeker, under the right energetic circumstances. You trust that “I only have to learn” instead of “I should be punished”…So..try to find what you physically must be doing, that gives it a little peace. It feels like blind steps…you don´t know where the next one leads.
Karma begins to be your kindest teacher as it guides you to these lessons. And although they are painful, you FEEL the release…and this release, (not orgasmic) is what is raising your energy. So, you feel depressed HERE…but in reality, you are FLYING there. These reversal energies, give you the wrong perception and many people fail, when they embark on these pathes.
It depends on choosing love…it is hard to explain. Karma… But when you have the opportunity to be nice or mean…then you learn to be “nice”. It is not so much about honesty, and truth, because you have already learned that…it is more about knowing the true laws of duality. They are cosmic.
It is different for everyone I imagine…
“When the energy does not flow…is when you begin to feel karmic bonds. You begin to instinctively feel what it is you have to learn…because the heart is something that searches..it is a seeker, under the right energetic circumstances. You trust that “I only have to learn” instead of “I should be punished”…So..try to find what you physically must be doing, that gives it a little peace. It feels like blind steps…”
Gatubela, you are so perceptive, it echoed much with what’s slowly being shaped witnin me by the events of the last few weeks. The release comes only from the active manifestation of what is felt to be true in my reality. ACTION. There are ghosts of my former self to be laid to rest. The Scorpionic past, its intensity, its drive towards another, its subsequent obsessions and longings – to be replaced with focus on self, on establishing own values and finding own strength, own emotional self reliance, through simplicity of living. Karmic bonds keep us chained to the past, because it’t what we subconsciously feel comfortable with, the stagnating prison of former selves.
She has been digging self and others with such determination, driven by the need to understand the sources of own turmoil and the need to connect. Some of it was ugly, and for that I am truly sorry. I have faced that WHICH NEEDS TO BE KILLED in her. We all have needs. But I
understand that I am the creator of this fullfilment, and I know I have THE WOMAN within me. I keep thinking about that tale… The Beauty and The Beast… She was beautiful not because of her physical appeal, but because she had virtue, inner freedom and strength to SEE IT THROUGH and not deviate from the path. Which was enough to transform the ugliness of the present form into something eternally beautiful, the creation of true happiness founded on virtue.
The sadness is… not dark and pointless, it’s enveloped in the clarity of these new perceptions, there is a path from the valley of Light. I step outside, and nothing FEELS real. I recognise all the features, the cars moving, people walking past… but it feels as if I am looking at it from a different dimention, it’s not the world as I KNEW IT. As if I am looking at it through an invisible glass, detached and motionless within. Hard to explain.
Gatubela, thank you for sharing your ocean walk. I guess the Taurus Moon does want to channel emotions through the tangible setting, which is hard to do here… I imagined instead. I felt it, and it resonated.
JESUS….
Eagle…. You said ‘catharsis’…. you said “I just happened to be blessed for the Source of the Universe to speak to me. So slowed down, quieted the mind, settled the heart, and just noticed myself breathing. I noticed my ego as a separate entity away from powerful spiritual energy flowing through me and around me”….
Have you gone through Kundalini awakening? Please tell me….
I am devastated.
Gatubela,
“A man wanting to protect is a very beautiful thing….I did not feel that part with my relationships and by the time someone really wanted to protect me, I had already been used to protecting myself.”
Well… it is not that they were evolved in any way. It’s just that they probably sense my innate feminine gifts, for the better word. I have a gentle nature which brings out that reaction in men. In the past I flowed with it, but at the expense of own individuality, forgetting my own needs. I thought I was selfless, while I was simply neglecting my own needs. And what we repress – will ALWAYS find a way out, and it won’t be pretty. How things have changed… I have gone the other way in the last ten years, since being on my own. I have to find that divine balance between the two. I can literally TASTE it in my mouth now, it is a very strange feeling… empowerment? I don’t know…. the discernment between where I end, and another begins. It used to be a struggle in the past. Don’t you feel though that we are automatically drawn to those who exemplify what we lack? For me, at least, this has always been the case.
“When the heart is not open”… it makes me emotional, this.. the open heart hurts. I don’t know how to explain it. Right now for me it’s near physical pain, it’s overwhelming, it’s flowing out, but it makes me feel unsettled and vulnerable. How does one find strength in that vulnerability?
I feel so tired and so horribly sad for days now, the hole has just gone bigger and bigger with each passing day, is that normal? My son senses it and just comes in sometimes and gives me a silent hug. We always read each other without words, it’s uncanny.. I want to cut my head off and put it on a shelf for a few months, let it rest and let me just be. I want nothing between me and emptiness.
Yes, the ocean… it heals. It brings peace, the moment of feeling its mighty energy and just… merging with it. I once swam in it at night, the thousands of plankton shining like stars in the sky with each breast stroke… it was magic.
I UNDERSTAND. My life has suddenly acquired a meaning that I have been searching for. It is in development and growth of the divine Awareness, a life path towards higher growth, a state of Consciousness which completes the circle of life. Oh, it doesn’t have to be an ashram, or a complete withrawal from the world or wearing orange robes. It may be the choice for some, but in reality the merge with the Divine happens through the most ordinary life circumstances… in soulful relating with others, even in the mundane exchange at the local supermarket… in artful execusion of one’s job, when we make it ‘our own’… in physical exhaustion after a great cycle ride, when the
sensations override thoughts… in observing the raindrops forming large circles in a puddle… in the silence of solitude, when the lessons are absorbed into one’s consciousness… the dance of life where every moment COUNTS for something. The mindfulness of those moments put together to expand and enrich our understanding. THIS is the salvation, not the feeling of the deity outside of ourselves who will kiss our boo-boos and will make things better. Ha! It is so amazingly simple and so infinitely complex. Why was I so blind not to see it before??? This awareness, the importance of life’s moments as they unfold, the will to get ahead regardless. When someone overcomes adverse circumstances and comes out on top – they are said to poses THE SPIRIT. Even the language reflects this simple truth, and people take it for granted, without the real FEEL of what it means. That spirit, a manifestation of their inner being… we don’t have to be heros, with acres of print in the newspaper to celebrate this truth, there may be thousands of people who overcome and move forward fearlessly, those unsung heros of humanity, the REAL spirit of it.. We are only limited by the lack of own Spirit within.
It is such a relief. We CAN be better humans. We CAN manifest this higher consciousness in most amazing and infinite ways, each one following their own path through life, but the destination is the same: the joy of merging with the true potential of the Divine selves, through pain and happiness and struggle… if one has the will and clarity of vision. I SO understand now.
And the heart… the heart knows the answers, truly. People dismiss its language. They are driven by ‘practical considerations’ of mundane reality and do not SEE the bigger picture. How do they fit into this world? What does TRULY make them happy? Can they become CREATORS of their own reality, instead of passively follow the adopted paradigm?
I am looking at what’s in front of me NOW, not how my life WAS. Every decision has to be made FROM THE HEART, not from the projections and illusions of the mind. Every little step based on that – will combine into the meaningful dance of what is one’s life. BEING life is being in every moment of life, from the heart intelligence. I understand. I KNOW.
And I understand that no amount of talking about unconditional love and higher consciousness would have brought me to this new awareness –
without conflict and challenging of what I already ‘knew’… . People read the words, they see them, they ‘agree’ or ‘disagree’ with them, but they do not FEEL them. They cannot connect the dots until the true feeling strikes, hits them on the head, makes them ACHE with the sensation of pain or joy and this new understanding is felt through the entire body. I could not truly perceive until I FELT it with every atom. If I cannot feel it, it simply remains text or empty words from someone, with no TRUE understanding. Here is the nature and function of feelings… In all my years of studying I have never felt or understood psychology in the way I understand now, and I have a great degree which allows me to do a PhD!? How ironic is that??? What does it SAY about our systems of education? I rebelled against it in my own way in the past, disheartened by the mechanistic approach, but still… it took one brave person to make it REAL.
It is through the EXPEREINCE of true love – we truly love. It is through the heart felt emotion – we feel own heart. It’s through real relating – we truly connect to another… I thought I knew what depth means.. I knew NOTHING… until now.
I am looking at the Pluto placements in my chart and REALLY begin to understand my massive Scorpionic tendencies.
Pluto in opposition to Sun, Mercury, Mars, Saturn, square Jupiter and conjunct Uranus (same for Uranus). Pluto/Sun opposition is one of the
hardest aspects in natal chart. If not consciously negotiated, it tends to push an individual to project all theLOWER SUN PERSON behaviours out into the world. My Piscean Sun (Higher Consciousness) has been cast in a shadow of Plutonic energy, with four Fishes keeping the foggy mist over my self awareness and the POTENTIAL for transformation. The transcendental energy of the Pisces Sun (identification with Higher Mind) in my chart is facing the challenge of being brought upwards, but there is salvation, a way of assimilating the shadow without identifying Self
with it. Hades and Posseidon can work together, through PLuto/Mars opposition in my chart. Yes, it externalises Pluto’s behaviour, thus, projecting the energy outward, in extremist Scorpionic ways. But awareness can bring Mars energy (will, instinct and direction) to support
the development of Higher Consciousness (Pisces) through transformative effects of Pluto (power, desire and fearlessness), IF I understand the direction in which it has to be applied, which is that of ego destruction through compassion, humility and understanding (Pisces) of ANOTHER (7th house). I understand… Piscean Mars and Sun yearn for that kind of self expression. Pluto DEMANDS to face one’s animalistic tendencies, and in my chart it demands to examine all types of relationships and let go of egotistic self expression. If an individual is not aware of this struggle, they spiral towards self destructive behaviour. It is projected in countless ways… intense dislike of any form of authority (yea, plus my Uranus, makes some stew of rebelliousness), senseless smashing of structures and boundaries (have done that too), fear of being controlled (consumed) by another’s energy (for me this one was COMPLETELY unconscious), intense privacy need and fear of exposure, a strong, even intimidating presence (and I wasn’t even aware of that!), search for a partner who will present a challenge, relationships with others through the prism of Self gratification, be it on a psychological or physical level.. And don’t even start on expression of one’s sexual energetic makeup. I realised that expression of my sexuality has played a massive role in my relationships, and why men always wanted to bed me, yet it could never be sustained. No man can possibly cope with a double whammy of a lower Piscean projecting self in a highly Plutonic fashion. And the Virgin did what she does best: passively observe and nag, instead of applying the power of analysis – to self. Even Mars Scorp was taken aback, and he was a grenade himself. He said ‘You are a very passionate and brave woman’.. but of course this on its own cannot sustain a healthy relationship.
And of course this opposition lies on the axis of Self (Pluto in the 1st) versus the Other (Sun in the 7th). Since our lives revolve largely around all sorts of relationships we form with others (7th)… talk about the battlefield. My animus got completely out of control, haha. Jung once said self individuation can only start once a person faced own Shadow, and the process then becomes that of an upward movement, and it doesn’t stop. Separation of self from Pluto, in a conscious objective thoughtful manner, makes for self discovery and an ability to harness its considerable power towards self understanding, healing and, ultimately, creative self actualisation of the inner gifts given to us from birth. Search for Pluto in your chart. Where it is, what aspects it makes to other planets and signs. It will tell you where and how you need to change.
The connection to self obliterates desire to live life through another, it’s just me and her. It makes me feel at ease. My multiple Pluto/Uranus/Chiron oppositions make for some heavy struggles in many areas of life. But.. it’s my path, an opportunity for growth. I want her to have a chance, and God that makes me emotional… . Some of us have a heavier load to carry than others, in terms of our psychological make up. It feels as if I finally have a rudder in my hand, and this boat is sailing somewhere, instead of being permanently trapped in the eye of the unconscious storm. It gives me faith.
Hi Ines,
I liked how you talked about yourself, by using astrology symbols to represent the energy.
I wish I could feel those oppositions. Like “how does a pluto in opposition to your sun FEEL?”
Is it conflict towards your very self? Is it a search for harmony? If you have this, what is the transformative state beyond?
Sometimes I feel that we have to apply our venus energy in order to deal with these oppositions. But , perhaps it is mars energy?
I know about that pisces energy with scorpionic projections. In my experiences, this cosmic knowledge requires some strong stuff in order to “sustain” it.
Yes…lower piscean projections with scorpionic personality is hard for anyone to handle, IF entered into with FALSE illusions. Meaning, if you are not REALLY in danger, then pisces can´t ground with Scorpio. Becasue Scorpio SEES the true path to walk…pisces gives the balance once surrendering to it.
But when scorpio SEES the truth, then its incredible healing powers and capacity for survival works well with piscean transcendental energy.
Or rather, the extremes of heaven and hell are clearly seen.
Ooooo, Gatubela, this is an ouch subject for me. Pluto oppositions feel like being torn between EVERY duality in existence. ME AGAINST THE WORLD (others), no less, in every area of life, remember it’s also Mercury, Mars and Saturn for me. It’s a subject in its own right. Venus energy CAN be elected to deal with those Scorpionic projections IF one has access to it. In my case – even there I am a natally challenged freak.
On top of my 20 oppositions and squares (*gulp*)… I have a rogue planet. A completely UNASPECTED Aquarian Venus sitting alone in the 5th House. This is a VERY rare occurance, since Sun and Mercury are usually in close proximity to it and at least form some conjunctions or squares. What does it mean? Venus is a deep seated appreciation of aesthetics of living, its beauty, sensuality, luxuries; an ability to show affection and love of another; a reverence for all things and people that bless us with comfort and serenity. Venus is about gracefully receiving those, and equally giving them back in grace. Venus is about harmony and peace. Venus is love of Life in its broadest sense. What about my rogue Venus? The Piscean Sun KNOWS deeply the meaning of love, but Love energy has no avenue of expression and no supporting energy to manifest through. How does that feel… as if I cannot trust myself to love. I constantly question whether it is true or not IN ME. Do I REALLY love? Or is it a tale in my head? It is very much like the phases of the Moon, waning in and out, when I feel full of love, and next I am detached and cold. I also doubt the love of others, as if I do not recognise it for what it is. In romantic relationships… I always fell for men who are unavailable in some way: physically (already attached or far away), emotionally… and rejected those who were interested, in which case I become an iron fortress inside, annoyed (!?) that someone CAN be into me. I don’t TRUST to be loved, and I have no way of expressing it WHEN it is needed from me. It almost feels… clumsy? The only time when the feeling was mutual was with my ex. For some reason he opened me up to what I was capable of giving.
I read about a case of a woman with an unaspected Venus who has been married for 30 years, and still couldn’t reconcile that with what love meant FOR HER. Her husband took a radical approach to see a psychological astrologer. She came to realise that her, being in that marriage WAS her love for her husband. They were good together, he knew that, but she kept looking for some OTHER manifestation. She was able to feel his love and give back through 30 years of marriage, BECAUSE he gave her the tools to love through his own love. I have no tools. Maybe this is why I maintained that I need to FEEL love from another, to enable me to truly open to the possibility of its existence? What happened inside of me as a result of all here is – detachment. I feel emotionally unavailable now, as if what little assurance of love existed within me – has been taken away. The tools were never there, and the heart opened into the Emptiness. Emotional sobriety is the term to describe it accurately.
I always felt that my destiny is that of solitude, even my marriage was a slip of fate and was not supposed to happen. No little girl’s dreams about getting married ever entered my mind, heck, I didn’t even have a wedding! When we did get married our son was already two, and we had been together for six years prior. MY marriage feels as if it happened to someone else. Uranus is a higher octave of Venus… an integration of both feminine and masculine energies into one outside of a conventional (personal) relationship. Meaning… one learns to be alone and to FEEL balanced in that solitude. Perhaps manifesting love instead through the social world, out there, as a form of sublimation of one’s inner drive, in the same way an evolved man sublimates his sexual energy into meaningful deeds. Oppositions are a sign of duality in an equation, something which needs the other to be understood and resolved. Of course again, it is a contradiction in my chart, because my Sun sits in the 7th house of marriage and relationships with others, opposing Pluto and Ascendant, haha… I now find comfort in that, and a strange sense of self respect, because despite all these inner tensions – I haven’t descended into madness, or screwed up as a person, or became an evil soul, or lost the ability to love, even if it is difficult to access; that I kept my head on my shoulders regardless. So I’ll sleep alone, but content.
I honestly feel I used to be a man in my previous life, and must have done some horrible deeds, because what I have to deal with within me now is some heady stuff. When I said I am complex by nature – I wasn’t kidding.I remember to have found it amusing PP’s assertion about Piscean relationships ‘how rocky can it get’… placid and peaceful, huh? Every rule has an exception, as this little grenade demonstrated. Peace to her.
I am not normal, Gatubela, a square peg, even here haha. At this stage I have no questions. The answers keep pouring in, I better explore them in the privacy of my own inner world.
Thank you.
“He gave her the tools to love through his love”…
I liked that sentence. Like there is another way to love…not just the way women do it.
I actually do feel there is another way to love…but every man I have known rejected that part of me.
That sentence touched me for some reason.
Have you seen the movie Shogun? There is a scene where the Japanese public bathes are explained.
“there is no privacy, there is only karma”
That is how I am able to be alone…and with people…its my way of balance. Being “alone” is an illusion.
I can’t access the video here, and I unsubscribed to e-mail notifications, so no link in my inbox. What title does this video have, I couldn’t trace it on Youtube?
I meant ‘alone’ strictly in a sense of partnerships. I don’t FEEL alone or lonely, that’s the paradox. Truthfully, I did twice when I was ‘in love’, and I have identified the trigger – desire for what I could not have. As long as I know that… Aloneness, to me, is a blessed state, time to connect to self. It helps that I am self sustaining by nature. I remember years ago an Aquarian acquaintence tried to battle this state of mine wanting to drag me places, which were of no interest to me whatsoever. Socialising crowds don’t make me feel uncomfortable, but they BORE me to tears.. She gave up in disbelief asking how I can be so content with myself. Her Scorpio girlfriend looked at me and said ‘She is just self sufficient inside, that’s all’. In my emotional sobriety I gently kick myself for deviating from my path of solitude. It only happened in the last three years when I met the Eagle in my physical life. I recognised in him all those qualities I was looking for in a man and never found before, and the frantic search ensued (which brought me here). Except, I didn’t stop to ask myself what qualities I *me* could bring into a relationship. Ah, the wisdom of Scorpionic lessons… I’ll stay away from Scorpio Suns. However, both my male friends… one has a Scorpio Moon, he is very difficult to open up emotionally. Another is Scorpio Mars and Venus, we get on like house on fire, his understanding of life and love is very close to what we discuss here. I love his uncompromising ways.
My life is divided into three very distinct phases: before marriage where I was the flower, and most crappy things took place during that time. During marriage I became the fighter, for myself, for him, for us, there was a lot of love, but we both got lost in our own heads and never took the time to find out about our personal demons. After marriage I became an island, friendly and warm on the outside, and an ice queen inside. This is something very personal to me… I once had a passing encounter with a man… we had sex… and he was so fucking attentive, and so GIVING, something I haven’t seen in a man… and something inside of me snapped, overwhelmed by that manifestation of his humanness… and silent tears came during sex, I think he understood, because he just put his arms around me and held me like that, silently too. it’s hard to even remember this now and sends me crying………… so is there a different way to love? Can a man melt the
ice in a woman, and not the other way around? Can a woman not be the flower, yet still love and be feminine? I have a very tender heart, but my expression may be harsh.
I now feel free from the ‘urge to merge’, haha. We are here and gone in a blink of an eye, in this physical form. My soul profoundly feels the responsibility to NOT LEAVE this world in a bad spiritual shape, so that someone else might inherit my unresolved issues and struggles.
hello. again .
just wanted to share a poem..
Happiness is not to be found with many efforts or will, but is here, nearby, in your relaxing and surrendering.
Don’t worry, there is nothing to be done.
Everything that comes up to your mind has no importance because it has no reality.
Don’t conceive any attachment for it.
Don’t judge yourself.
Let it be.
Let it come up and down without changing a thing.
It all vanishes and begins again, endlessly.
Nothing but the quest for happiness prevents us from seeing it.
It is like a rainbow that one is always chasing without ever reaching it.
It is because it has no existence.
It has always been here and goes with you all the time.
Don’t believe in the reality of experiences, good or bad.
They are like rainbows.
Because we want to grasp what is not to be grasped,
We exhaust our strength in vain.
As soon as we relinquish our hold, space is here, open, welcoming & comfortable.
So, do enjoy it.
Everything is yours already.
Stop searching.
Don’t go into the jungle to look for the elephant that is quietly waiting for you at home.
There is nothing to do.
There is nothing to force.
There is nothing to desire.
And all comes by itself.
Hey, Umm.. I thought of writing something, and this came out…
The moment is gone. In the beautiful distance
Of time, through our mightily felt regrets
It smiles as the mind’s futile resistance
Offers the ‘ifs’, rearranging the blacks and the reds.
**
Red: if a hint of a smile you could only read
In my lips through that day of nagging and scolding,
In the moment of my undeclared need
When I was shouting silently ‘Hold me’,
**
Would you step outside of your wounded self,
Throw me the arms of protective ring.
No words to be said; or would I have
Walked the sharp egg shells in the offering?
**
Black: if you wake up in the deepest blue,
The pounding heart of descending into Morpheus Hell,
In the moment of greatest vulnerable you
The scariest journey you are unlikely to tell,
**
Would I rip off the shimmering silver lining
Of the cloud that haunts you within,
Gently wrap you in it; or would I indulge in declining
Your need for withdrawal as selfish and mean?
**
In the beautiful distance that moment is gone,
Smiling and not to be answered ‘how’.
Through the riveting lessons every second is born
in the past and the future completeness of ‘now’.
thankyou Ines,
that really struck a chord with me.
reminds me to be gentle with myself
“Because we want to grasp what is not to be grasped,
We exhaust our strength in vain.”
Locked in torturous prison, chained and clasped
We live with the mental cane.
Hugs
It’s so late here,a nd I cannot sleep again. I have UNDERSTOOD the power of surrender. It took me back to how I was when young, how men reacted to me by being protective and supportive, and how much joy there was, this is how things were where I grew up, and how then things went wrong, I slowly began to turn into the opposite of what I once was. Male abuse took all the femininity out, I remember that quiet and studious girl and i am crying now, she is so fucking real and still alive, and I feel the need to embrace her and say ‘It was not your fault’. and the truly feminine and wise Piscean women make the best mates for Scorpio men, yet this one turned herself inside out to protect that tenderness to such a degree that it got burried under from years of abuse. it’s hard to live in this world, I don’t understand anything in it anymore, it used to be so simple and clear, no stupid facebook, iphones, PCs, people SPOKE to each other face to face, and how the feminine right to vote turned into the right to dominate and bitch, and get drunk and flush your naked butt to passing men (popular here in England). And my son tells me boys at school are afraid of girls because they KILL and annihilate at any given opportunity, that’s what male abuse resulted in, in emasculating its sons through freshly cooked dominatrix girls… it was not my fault, but I see her now. she is here with me. Oh it hurts again so much, after days of contemplation and inner balance it hits again, this awareness, so deep and painful, I pray that I got her back for good. i am a big open wound again, but I will heal I know. That’s why I couldn’t love.
oh thank you Ines , that there is your surrender, that there is your love , your truth , your femininity and compassion, and wisdom .and i love you for it
p.s and yes it was true i did swim through dolphin cum many years ago
Well…here, Mariko, has rigid ideals which also influence her capacity to love a man. Although there are many things to “disagree with ” in this series.
He is an ocean navegator – At the end of the movie, you can see a mixture of a woman loving in a detached way as well, as through her love , he symbolically returns to the ocean he loves so much.
Intense..when society and soul purpose make people search for higher forms of love…..beyond.
Umm, thank you, and thank you for telling me about your swim, it was so unbelievable that the reaction of the presumptious mind was to negate. I am very sorry for that.
.. true understanding can only be triggered through a FELT feeling… through
silent contemplation and observation, and than it hits like a brick, painful… And it can be put into books or preached from the pulpit, but this form will fail, and the religion fails again and again to reach the soul, and why the Eagle does what he does. He induces to feel the soul where everybody else pats you on the back, a cowardly route to escape the realities of human inner worlds. But only if one is brave enough to stick it out and let it happen. Let it IN. Many simply run away. A scorpio man’s spiritual identity is intertwined with an instinctual understanding of the plight of the helpless, the drive to protect, and especially women, a gift of Scorpionic healing powers through such intense inner connection to the feminine divine…the helpless can too become leeches, if they do not gain the wisdom of their own strength, which
EVERYONE has. Or else it becomes an emotional domination, through being covertly helpless, or overtly agressive. A truly feminine woman will combine the confidence (masculine) of mind with the non demanding nature (feminine)of the helpless, freeing herself and her man from the codependant misery of feeding each other’s ‘needs’. And I was either one or another, but never both. Harmony through conflict then becomes more than a mere literal result of interpersonal dynamics, the inner conflicting search modifies one’s perceptive abilities and completes the circle – the balance of energy. I feel so grateful to both of us for having stayed the course.. and I am sorry for having had no respect for the strengths and vulnerabilities which exist within both, for not acknowledging those silently and accepting them for what they are. And I never forgot this, said to me a year ago, it haunted me, because it was true:
“To remind you of your beauty, and innocence even if you don’t believe in those gifts yourself. All of this has been, has meant… love, in my world.”
Gatubela, the lyrics made me cry so much, echoing what I cannot say really…. And yes, society pushes to search for higher forms of love, not necessarily expressed in the male/female relationship; it is as if this love exists somehow outside of this society, never accepted out there to be the only true form of existence… don’t know how to explain.
I was warned that every step upwards will come with pain, so true..
I am taken over by a flu like feeling, so achy and weak
JUMPING OFF AND STAYING
This one was clearly in elation
Of having said ‘I love you’.
Caught by the boredom of stagnation,
Its gray suffocating hue –
I jumped off.
**
This one was enthralled
Unable to stay away for a day,
But when the emotional honesty called,
Each kept their truth at bay –
We both jumped off.
**
This one was gripped with fear
Of feelings with no control.
Yes, we both felt it acutely, dear.
I left in your court that ball –
You jumped off.
**
This one could not be touched
In integrity of his persuasion.
Some things are evenly matched,
But in the wrong life location –
We didn’t jump in.
**
This one sliced and burned
Through pretence and illusions of tough.
And the woman slowly learned
The true meaning of soulful love –
I stayed.
no worries Ines.
My number ONE book is ‘Master and Margarita’ by Mikhail Bulgakov. It is considered a masterpiece of the 20th century literature, but I didn’t know it when I first read it as a teenager. I have been in its grip ever since. It was written in the 1930s, but got published first in the 60s, and a few years back at last got a TV version. Nobody before dared to touch it, because it is so complex.
It is about eternal love and its relation to death, and the sacrifices it demands, about how society destroys a person, about Jesus and Pontius Pilatus, about the Satan’s work which is not always detrimental to the soul. Margarita was requested to host the Satan’s Ball, it would give her a chance to find out about the fate of her disappeared lover, Master who wrote a condemned novel about Pontius Pilatus and Jesus.. In the end Margarita and Master are granted peace, but NOT light, for they haven’t earned it, through their choices. Here is the closing part of the Satan’s Spring Ball:
There is an excellent, a very accurate translation into English in other videos on Youtube, but hey, the book is so much better:
All Saints tomorrow…
i think orgasms are it. there you have life there you have surrender, death. the whole kit and caboodle. and its bloody fantastic.
hello .. venus is squared pluto at the moment.. pretty intense . i thought of screaming today but jumped into a waterhole at the ocean instead and cut my hand on a barnacle encrusted rock.hurt
whatever.
then i ate some chips and gave some to a seagull.. he ate ten straight up.he was a little seagull too ..he flew down to the sea to have a drink in between every next chip..and coming back for more.just on his own. i wondered if seagulls ever o.d from too many chips.. i also wondered if a chip would get stuck in its throat.but he was fine. he stopped eating after a while then told his mate about the chips on offer. the wind shifted and i left
I find Aquarian people so challenging.they are so detached emotionally.. they aren’t even in touch with what they feel , who they are.they skit along the surface in their own worlds wanting everyone to join them in their emotionally detached kooky eccentricity, out trying to make the world a better place etc. stubborn, pushy and upset if they dont get their own way.materialistic! afraid to look to deep into anything,to FEEL anything, confronted and run from anything emotional.they just cant DEAL with it.they lack the sensitivity. living with two air signs and its doing my head in.
It’s true that Aquarians are difficult to get to know on a personal level, or at least the way I need to know people. I have known a few, not as friends, but though work and others. They are sensitive, but in a different way. They are sensitive to anyone attempting to take away their freedom to be individual. I can understand that through my Aquarian Venus. They do not UNDERSTAND the source of their own emotions or even what those are, and why they feel in a certain way. Those two make for some volatility in temperament and reactions. But they do not carry personal agendas, and it’s a blessing in many ways. Aquarians give as much space as needed, without batting an eyelid and worrying about what the person is up to. Detached.
One of my good acquaintences is a Virgo with an Aquarian son. They fought since he was a young boy. Eventually she let go and gave up on trying to control his choices and his ways. But it took her a decade. Imagine that?
I must really love my son, because he is the only person I never tried to control. He appreciates that a lot. I know that because I am the subject of his conversations with friends, like a deity LOL. This is the kind of love I want to feel towards a man. It is easy and joyful, without pressure. A beautiful journey of inner freedom from messy emotional states. And all it takes is a restructuring of inner expectations. Meaning – none. The flow.
you sound like you are in a better place.. in yourself. 🙂 crazy isnt it how easy is it that we can beat ourselves up.. place such high expectations on ourselves, life and people around us.. and the flow stops when we do it..nothing works out, just keep hitting our heads.. but when we stop.breathe. let go. surrender and trust and be GENTLE with ourselves.. we can experience all the good stuff 🙂
An Aquarian Sun or Rising, and planets in or aspecting the 11th house are- Impersonal people… by nature. Aquarius in it’s eccentric quirks, are all about the light easy “sophisticated” friendship. Nothing too heavy, or vile language … or they’ll flee like a startled fawn.
Aquarius is socially aware of the individual ‘expressed’ through us…and they are indeed aware of the sheep conformity we hold so dear among us. There was an Aquarian woman friend of mine a few years ago, she was older than me, we became close friends. She was incredibly gifted at seeing the truth through subtle social dynamics. What I mean by that is…. she “understood” the game of superficiality better than anyone I’ve known. She even opened my eyes to a few interesting dynamics she had “known” about people when we went out for drinks. If you were to probe an Aquarian psyche about a depth-perception of themselves… they are generally superficial of what they know. But yes… she too was very subjective, argumentative and stubborn in her “views” with me. She would argue with me just to be “right” which made me smile a lot. I think she was either an Aries rising, Virgo rising… either way, she was a fiery little pistol when someone challenged her views. And my very being is a smoldering cauldron of psycho-sexual challenge. I didn’t mind it from her though, because I knew she had a good heart in her and through become close to her, I came to realize she was an advanced soul too.
Hey Ummm… it’s a pleasure having you back here.
You know your deep psychic tentacles and exquisitely sexual/emotional Scorpio Moon… would definitely have difficulties bonding closely with Aquarian people. So don’t take their detachments ‘personally’… little Virgo. Remember the key word with anyone Aquarius or Uranian and even people with loads of dreamy charismatic Neptune, are—-an ‘Impersonal’ personality…. through their Air (intellects).
Uranus, the planet of rebellion and revolt, is the higher octave of Mercury, which is the commentator, if you will, of conformed social transmitting . Uranus, it’s drive… is trans-personal..it stands back from the group mind, while fusing ‘with’ the cultural group mind simultaneously…as opposed to a Gemini and Virgo Mercury… which is simply chatty, short in attention span, personal, and yammered through the subjective (perception).
Both Gemini and Virgo are two ‘Mutable’ psychological natures, so they are more flexible and fluid with their communication. As opposed to Uranus being Fixed Air, so it’s drive is to communicate as a more rigid “knowing”. Knowing implies an Individualistic frame of reality, a step-or two outside of the flock discussions we hear and see all day long. Hey… a revolutionary (Uranus) must… must… defend his/her mental ideals under the immense pressures of the herd-state cultural programming. It make’s a lot of sense really if one is true to their-self (individualistic) in this mythical induced material world.
In fact, through my experiences, strong natal signatures of Capricorn, Aquarius and Pisces ARE ALL IMPERSONAL through their relating, they’re detached socially from anything personal encountering their minds. You can’t really pin them down and get into the nitty-gritty of WHO THEY REALLY ARE in a personal, let’s get warm on the couch context…compared to say a person with a cluster of planets in Cancer or Scorpio, or in the 4th or 8th houses who love that closeness. Of course in my time, I’ve truly made ANY Sign uncomfortable during intimacy… even the plodding earthy-dry Bull (Taurus)… whom didn’t know such intense feelings were lying deep inside them! hahaha.
So this detachment we experience in our social jaunts, of the above 3 signs and houses (10,11,and 12) especially… are all in my experience concerned with the world of people at large. Not just a focus on their mate… but a mutation of sensing energy among “a friend” style-of-mate. These astrological natures are seeking to find their place in the world among a collective ideal, or among shared interests/purposes. It makes sense that these three signs and planets in those three houses, are evasive and elusive in many respects regarding eye staring one-on-one… yes… just you and me and the silence of truth baby!,.. inclining into an intensely felt intimacy through discussion, and then meal/drink and orgasm- transmuting this felt energy as One soul.
Not so with Cappy, Aqua and the Fish. They are wrigglers.
Unless Aquarius knows death. Then you have an incredibly intense person, who knows what it truly takes to be rebellious and put the VERB to it.
Well, yes… I feel in a much better place internally, kind of.. walking through the wood and seeing both the trees and the wood itself.. Umm, I don’t know how you feel it, but for me dealing with emotions caused by external events is much much easier than dealing with feelings which rise out of the blue, from the deep subconscious, suddenly, without warnings, without any external reasons… something that is intrinsic to my nature. It’s a war. I know I will never be of innocent puppy mind, my nature is far too complex for that. Unless I physically go through the transformation which is a different story all together. BUT I know now that complex mind can be at peace. I stopped attaching any negative mental contructs to those feelings, and it set me free. I am learning to let go… it is easier than I thought. But there are other personal demons to have a chat with, I know about them, but here is not for those. I have a blog now.
I started writing a lot of poems, something I haven’t done since being a teenager. There is a need for creative expression. What exists within me is wisdom which I tapped into now, instead of following the monkey mind.
When my son was a very young boy, I was very protective of him. As years went by I slowly separated from him. It sounds strange I know, people used to ask me ‘How can you be so calm when he does this or that’. When he was thirteen he was part of a cyber attack on Scientology (his pet hate) web servers, organised all the contacts in the South West of England… our at the time IP address got listed on their website. It got him thinking about the consequences, but I didn’t even know at the time. I have recently discovered he’s had a blog for years (he wouldn’t show me) and lots of followers, plus lots of haters who contact him and rant about his expression… gives you an idea.. my answer was never understood by people. And the answer was ‘He is a human being, he is part of me, but SEPARATE. He is part of this world in the same way as we all are, like plants and animals, no different to others even in his own individuality.. So I let him be’. Then I hear back a gasp ‘But he is your son’. Yes, and I will jump for him, when it is needed. I guess this may be taken as impersonal. If a Capricorn views people as part of an external worldy structure, solid and ‘belonging’ to the tangible, and an Aquarian looks at people as part of a social group, I see people as part of the collective conscious/subconscious mind, yes, bigger than me and any one individual. Yet, I am very personable in the way I relate to people. Just don’t ask me to tell you all my secrets, by secrets I mean my inner states, I can tell anything of my outer existence, that is not a problem. But I will tell of my inner world in time if I feel the trust. I must say.. not many make the mark. And that’s OK.
The first six signs are all personal, which makes Scorpio an impersonal nature too, in a sense that they try to transcend their own very subjective perceptions and elevate them to an objective view, towards developing Sagittarian world philosophies. The key word is TRANSFORMATION of personal into impersonal. For a Piscean it is FUSION of those two into one. That’s how it feels to me.
I feel that I switch between the two all the time. Can be tiring, again the need for balance.
“But I will tell of my inner world in time if I feel the trust.”
Ooooh, that made me emotional, because I reflected a bit more.. Trust is willingness to place oneself in other person’s hands unconditionally. UNCONDITIONALLY. surrender is about trust, about placing total faith in another person. I trust my Taurean friend in that way, because she has a soul. But a man? How can one, after all the shitty life experiences, after having been THAT trusting, and see what happened? A broken flower. Everything that shouldn’t happen to a woman: rape, infidelity, drunkenness of another, vomit, no help whatsoever with the child, emotional and physical isolation, away from everything that could offer support.. I accept those were part of my life, but how can I trust again? Trust is about being emotionally vulnerable with the person, and how can I trust any man again not to abuse that vulnerability?
The only way out from this black hole is an open heart and allow the POSSIBILITY of it, faith in the possibility of trust taking place between two people. No expectations. This is the only thing I can have right now, a little step towards being human again, being a woman, will I ever learn again? And discernment comes into it… feeling, seeing a person, who they are and not what I want to believe about them. I feel that trust is earned. On both sides. This made me cry a little. Again, it comes down to three things: an open heart, discernment of another and time.
I didn’t realise how deep seated these things are within me now. Coupled with a general Piscean tendency to privacy… how can anyone understand that yearning for openness, yet, an inner barrier a sky high… fuck.
You’d be surprised.
how can you trust again? you’re doing it now.. so its not something that needs to be projected in to the future as an ideal which makes it unreal. stay in the moment in every experience. you have seen you past that is not your future. You have understood how those experiences affected you and hurt you then,but it is not YOU. Those experiences are not you..so when relating to someone remember that. You now have awareness, and yes can be discerning. you have been blessed with a choice of what you want to give and what you want to receive. It is up to you to take control of that. We all make mistakes too. thats ok.. none of us are perfect.
“Will i ever learn again’.. you are now
hey Pluto,
yeh its a pleasure for me too. your words made me smile and feel warm..
Im feeling bit more tolerant of Aqua now.. i stubbed my toe and she lent me her bag of frozen peas.and offered her first aid kit.you explained it well, and i know she means no harm, and there is an understanding of her rebellion and her independence.. I like that she isnt following the flock so much.. and yeh, like another aquarian i know she has an awareness of group dynamics and there is something inspiring about that collective consciousness stuff. but too much and i cant handle it.. its fine in small doses hehe. I am into more personal relating. yep, warm on the couch one on one plenty of eye contact and silence of truth yes yes yes. all of it.transmutating, exactly.otherwise whats it all for ? meaningless round and round friendly chit chat that goes nowhere and leaves me empty, hungry and with a headache.
Ines,
for me there is no separation from whether my emotions are springing up from external or internal.. well they ARE internal. there are times when i struggle to understand where they are coming from and why etc but yes i guess i just go through it and usually identify the triggers. im not separate from what is outside of me.my emotions are an intrinsic part of who i am. i am glad i am emotional and can feel. as soon as i try to stuff it down or deny who i am then the crap starts. or if i label what i am feeling, box it up, or judge it. i feel that you are actually quite innocent, that is how i see you.the innocence is in your truth when you feel it and express it.not fighting it.
Umm, thank you for your words of wisdom.
“stay in the moment in every experience.”
Yep, that’s the one. What is happening now is actually making me feel ill, that strange feeling of flu again, it’s about reaching into the pockets of own awareness that hit inside. I don’t know if I am innocent, I certainly was until my mid twenties. In fact, someone once called me a puppy, pertaining to that quality, a strange coincidence as it stands now… I am not pure of mind now, and I am finding my way back… That makes me cry again, fuck, this process of stripping layers and layers of acquired defensive mechanisms, it feels very painful, my whole body is protesting, my mind shouts ‘Do not do it, what for, argue and debate, you will feel better, to the known territory, off you go’, it feels like turning inside out again, so uncomfortable and raw and violent inside.. It feels almost shameful as if I suddenly lost all clothes in public, and I want to run and hide.. and I am saying to myself ‘Stay. Stay with it and let it take you where it goes.’
Umm.. hug
thinking about smell at the moment.wonder if they will invent computers that enable smell travel.i mean,smell teleportal.. is that the word im looking for? i dont know.anyway blah blah.. i remember reading somewhere a couple of years ago that in japan they have sniff cinemas.. aromas that waft out during films. not sure how that would be.. but smell is so important. its a make or break.. for me anyway.the smell of a person.
i really feel like some ice-cream right now.
Gemini people also exasperate me a bit.. there is something i dont quite trust..they are thinkers i can see that and their brains go overtime.. all that mercury stuff maybe.. and they are moody. but they can be evasive and yeh hard to pin down too.. just like aquarius as soon as there is some intensity or direct eye contact they scurry off like frightened mice.I feel like they have hidden agendas,, there is a level of superficiality which i dislike.and tense.. yeah. they can be good communicators at times though and they have a fun playful side to them.. but even then there is an undercurrent of tension that i can feel.. they havent landed .. i dont feel strong sense of self and connection with what is around them..
I meant to write “i dont feel their strong sense of self”
And then there’s the humour thing…with both of those signs..they dont get it. well mine anyway.
… in an environment where there is this fucking continual surface fluff.. and mind numbing television.. and cogs to the wheel and pressure to conform etc etc. and no questions asked.. just blind slavery to the masses and the man.and the money in their hand. step out the door and i see it. bleating woolly and boring! dare myself to walk naked down the street to get a takeaway coffee.pft they’d arrest me. idiots. fuck it im going surfing.
gotta say..its tough having scorpio moon placement sometimes.. feel toooo much and struggle with people.i sense more than i wish too alot of the time.I brood and im moody and i have to dig beneath the surface with everything almost.every single emotion, to know and feel the truth at all times.even if it is intensely painful.. i go there.I struggle with the superficialities of people and the choices they make most days.i need passion or life feels meaningless.I am strong but I fear myself.most people dont understand me at a deep level.so I am a loner in many ways. I struggle to let go…
Scorpio Moon, lonesome and bright,
Looking down on this innocent bay,
Sending high tides in the darkness of night,
salvaging wreckage in the light of the day.
**
Scorpio Moon and its cotton wool mists,
Wading through feelings that hide within
Of own and others; incomprehensible twists,
Revealing the virtues of nightmarish sins.
**
Scorpio Moon always remembers the pain
Of own discoveries; bestowed the mission
To uncover, ponder and skillfully gain
Understanding of feeling as the human condition.
You know, Umm… we create passion (meaning) in the way we live our lives. Every day.
yea i do have passion and meaning in my life.. its not something i feel “lacking” in myself. and yes i create it.. and fucking love to give it and share it and receive it.some people just cant cope with it thats all i meant.
thankyou for that poem.. x
Thomas Moore said that the soul is more interested in particulars than in generalities, and that identifying with a group, or a syndrome, or a diagnosis is giving in to an abstraction… Nothing wrong with that, except abstraction leads to an oppressive fundamentalist view of life, by subscribing to the prevalence of one notion over another, a point of exclusion and separation. When I identify strongly with my natal oppositions and squares – I limit my own potential for psychological growth. I was given a set of psychic predispositions, but I am more than that, SO MUCH MORE. When I point out a total absence of masculine influence in my childhood and subsequent lack of male understanding – I give myself excuses to stay in the cage of rigid, externally acquired ideas, and again, it is not ME. And I refuse to take my sole Venus as a sign of inability to feel and express love, it is simply not true. Fundamentalist views severely lack fluidity and soulful evolution, essentially preventing us from developing at our own pace and robbing us from potential for growth. Have I been a fundamentalist in my structured and most defined views of this messy and most undefined reality? Most certainly.
I have touched eternity in the last few days, and it wasn’t pretty at all, no rainbows, paradise lost, and felt in my bones. It was never ending, my heart pumped with adrenaline, and the word ‘eternity’ kept ringing in my ears. A long corridor of the past passing through me and stretching into the future. I am not there, but I am there…. I felt both scared and accepting. The violent seesaw of switching between polarities of every emotion and thought has ceased. I don’t know for how long.
wow i just had a deja vu. it reminded me of when i have had similar feelings.. you know WHEN YOU DONT KNOW….. and there is no thought on that.. its just a FEELING , a deep soulful knowing.thats it.. there are words to describe..maybe that moment between life and death where time ceases to exist.it is so fucking PURE. you are not controlling its time.. its birthdate or death date, cos hey.. as soon as you do that- project an idea onto how long it will last.. the moment is gone.
everyone is going to have a theory in life about this or that.. and countless books have been written..the psychologists, the philosophers, the occultists, the poets, quantum physics, there are hundreds of isms and schisms.. things get so complicated!.. thomas moors is one viewpoint. yeh i can see what he says.. but we are all individuals ..wanting to connect… cos in essence you could argue that his idea is actually condoning conformity in otherS to his idea. more than one.. group… masses..whatver.. its about choice. plenty of hypocrites around.. yeh . and alot of people on power trips and seeking love and affection. ha i am one! fucking ego! ha.whatever.
my recommendation to you Ines.. get your head out of those books.. fuck the isms, put them on the fire!!!
keep NOT knowing 🙂
and tell me to shut up.
its your journey
im tired im going to bed
Actually, for me it was the opposite. I KNEW. What was different… the DEPTH of the feeling, as if another dimension opened up and revealed itself, and it was profoundly SAD and profoundly GIGANTIC, like being part of a massive ocean, feeling as part of it, but also feeling your own physical parts AS part of it. I don’t know how to describe it… feeling all the past generations before me, them IN ME? God, it’s impossible… There was no joy in it, but acceptance. I felt that as metamorphosis of my perceptive reality, a shift towards some occult quantity which HAS ALWAYS BEEN THERE in its permanence, and I only touched it now… Does it make sense? For me personally, I feel it is the true beginning of faith. Just like that. You see… a couple of weeks back I ASKED. I said ‘I am OPEN, please show me. TAKE me there, let me come out of that limbo’. And it did.
Thats the thing with eternity…for some reason the never endingness feels like an echo. Eternal…and present, reminding you of something long forgotten.
Rows of houses all bearing down on me
I can feel their blue hands touching me
All these things into position
All these things we’ll one day swallow whole
And fade out again and fade out
This machine will, will not communicate
These thoughts and the strain I am under
Be a world child, form a circle
Before we all go under
And fade out again and fade out again
Cracked eggs, dead birds
Scream as they fight for life
I can feel death, can see its beady eyes
All these things into position
All these things we’ll one day swallow whole
And fade out again and fade out again
Immerse your soul in love
Immerse your soul in love
Argh… Radiohead, my FAVOURITE!!!! I went to a couple of their concerts in the late 90th, in one they performed ‘How to disappear completely (the Dublin Ghost) for the first time, I was mersmerised. This one ‘(street Spirit) and most others are on my mobile.
Thom Yorke is a Libra. Social consciousness.
Thank you for that.
hehe yeah i saw them last night.. was fantastic going to see them in two more days.. again.. greedy piglet i am
Umm, we are Generation X, a conjunct Uranus/Pluto in Virgo. It works as a combine explosive Scorpio combo. Mine in the first house, yours? I am older than you which explains a bit why I found it hard to let go initially… too many lifetime habits to destroy and rebuild. I cannot stop reading and, most importantly, FEELING the books and the knowledge contained within. I am very discerning when it comes to those, never taking their words as a Gospel, the knowledge has to SPEAK to me from deep within. I don’t take as a Gospel whatever we discuss here either, that’s why God gave me the heart and the brains, right? But as I said before – feel the knowledge through the soul, and the soul will detect the truth.. or not, as the case may be.
It’s your journey too, and no less important. I don’t feel that wanting love and affection is about ego. Wanting to FORCE love and affection – is Ego. So yes, want it, Umm, search for it, love passionately and with abandon if it comes, I have a lot of respect for women who are capable of it, I know you are, and so am I. Love can never be perfect, if there is one thing to take each moment as it comes – it’s when in love. I do have desires, and longings, nothing wrong with that, I am a woman. Except I see the imperfection of it all now, it’s wonderfully whole and no words can describe it. Surrender to what is, sweet.
Scorpio men… I bumped into one over summer, turned out to be married to a Gemini woman, a difficult relationship. He kept inviting himself for a chat in my kitchen, in the end it became evident that these kitchen ‘get togethers’ will become dangerous if continued. He said ‘If I get a divorce, I will find you’. Right. I tore his card and took it out of my mind. I have been subtly pursuied by a man for the last eight months. Started with ‘Maybe one day we’ll go for a drink’ I say I don’t drink. ‘Coffee then’. Then it becomes ‘How about that coffee’. Then ‘When are we going for that cofee’ Then a mobile number which I lost twice, for lack of interest. He kept giving it to me. So I said ‘OK, we’ll go for that cofee. This Saturday?’ And he says ‘Can’t do Saturday, it’s my birthday’. Scorpio. I call to let him know Friday no good, and he wouldn’t let me off the phone, keeps asking questions, and I say ‘You are interviewing me’ He says seriously ‘I want to get to know you. ‘Except he is 33 and waaayyyy too young. I am flattered, but really.. He’s seen me in all sorts of ways, without makeup ( I don’t wear it daily), dressed like for a demolition job and the opposite, with face puffed up from crying and happy as a larry… You see… the wrong life location again. It keeps happening, too young, too married, too heart broken, or too stupid and ego infused me, haha.. I am amused, because I realised that fatal meeting with a Scorpio man WILL take place at some stage, and the
‘everything’ will be just right. I simply wasn’t ready before. I am very relaxed about everything now. I also understood that I WAS pursued by Scorpio men way back, except… when I was younger I used to fall for fiery types, or for the solid Earthly ones, and didn’t notice the quietly confident Scorpios, haha.
I am in a good place right now, some random difficult feelings float in and I acknowledge them, and they dissipate like a fog. I LOVE it. I have control over those AT LAST, and I am not even trying.
mm love passionately and with abandon. yum.
my uranus is in libra and my pluto is in virgo in first house same as my sun
OK, my mistake, your Uranus moved a bit a few years down the line. Uranus in the 7th, that’s some serious desire for independence within a relationship. Freedom in marriage or freedom from marriage… You probably like unconventional types who let you be yourself, without constraints and… an occasional separation phase? Populated 7th house… makes it hard to find an equal, doesn’t it…. I noticed we all here seem to be independent types somehow.
P.S. it’s getting harder and harder to post here. Craig, if you are reading this… please please have mercy, separate this into pages:)
There is a scorpionic truth in these lyrics…Darkness is not always nihilistic. It depends on your reasons for the journey, and what it takes to Verb it. The nicest thing is when it calls…and someone finally has the ability to “answer” in love´s most rawest essence. It is an indication of incredible soul evolution and mastery.
It made me feel like I could move those mountains.
It is a song by “Vadar” called “When Darkness Calls”
In the midst of wave
Unconceivable Evil
And we are drowning down
Into the forgotten city
Oxygen becoming treasure
Is it time to choose
…yes, it is…
We plunging in madness
In the depths of madness
Into the light in the end
Of this terrible journey
Guided by figure sculpted in ivory
Place, where absence of life
Does not mean morality
Imagination in one with memory
And memories are so real
Unveiling the mystery
Storm choirs are wailing
Splendid structures
Going out searchlight
In the midst of wave
Unconceivable Evil
And we are drowning down
Into the forgotten city
It’s time to choose
And I am choosing
The Unknown…
Hmmm… I don’t want to enter the forbidden city (Scorpio Underworld) anymore, I had the sightseeing tour. I will wait at the gates patiently and lovingly, but keeping my toe in, my bodice purple and my arms soft:) It is not about me, or him. It is about the energy of forever..
I feel so… light hearted.
Crush and Burn
We choose another, and we get chosen.
A trial and error, we get on with life.
Memories of what once was remain frozen,
Stuck like a skilfully thrown knife.
**
Fixed to the point where promises cuddled
And carried us through the dreamy landscape
Of a brand new love; the senses muddled
With grand expectations of a blissful escape.
**
To the place where flaws are accepted as virtues,
And the virtues become an eternal seal,
Unconditional bond of the soulful nurture,
Celebrated to love, to protect and to heal.
**
And we carry this innocent child like vision
When the fire of love turns the wood into ash.
The divine and the mortal meet in collision
Burning embers of passion suddenly crush.
**
Time again molten furnace is left in the frame
Of living feelings and hurt for good measure.
Yet, we stubbornly vow to search for the name,
Of the one whom we’ll cherish and treasure.
———–
My last twelve months are POURING out of me in poems and songs. Help!!!!
woohooooo!!!
plooooooto.
i miss you.
dinner?
what shall we eat..
In ‘Master and Margarita’ the Satan says to her “It was a test. Never ask for anything, ever. And especially from those stronger than you! THEY themselves will ask. THEY themselves will make the offer. Sit down, proud woman. What do you want for having been my hostess tonight?”.
Umm… believe it when I say – you are the Queen.
I wrote this a few weeks ago and finished last night.
HOLE OF LOVE
An entry into your explanations
Which I didn’t seek from Adam.
Beautiful thoughts compilations,
Combat extractions with blood on them.
**
Hide and seek behind the worn curtain
Of past experiences and betrayed choices.
Entered your world blissfully certain,
And left with conflicting voices.
**
A mindful touch without physical carrier,
Or was it a mindless feast of the ‘I’?
I fell through the gaps of my pitiful barrier,
While yours remained fortress like high.
**
My tenderness blossomed in isolation,
Thrown into the occult of oblivion.
Pebbles of wisdom in your explanation
Of cracking the hearts and leaving them.
**
What remains is a puddle of burgundy blood
From the heart lovingly wrapped in tissue.
A broken valve used to controlling the flood,
But of course this is not your issue.
**
The bodily parts to collect and to mend,
Arteries sawn to the slivers of brain.
The Hadean feast has come to an end.
Creator, kiss me to life again!
**
Whether Apple of God made us crazy or sane,
And the love battlefield was evenly matched –
This hole of love will forever remain
In each one of those you painfully touched.
———-
There is a great responsibility in love.
and another thing….
I had to listen to my heart very intently today, through the subtle discontent within. A manifestation of my mortal side which is trying to deal with the aftermath of the demolition. I understood these poetic expressions as a way of working towards the acceptance of what is, and honestly… the body of poetic work connected me to my own:) a way of release. But there is a quiet voice within which is getting stronger now. It tells me that true love is silent. I once saw a French film in which a man loved someone in that way, and did things anonymously, the whole village wondered who it was, and to the end of his days he never revealed his secret, even though he had much to gain in doing so. Don’t even remember the name now. In that kind of love words are powerless. I was a teenager at the time, and it impressed me no end. Somehow I forgot that, and remembered again now. Sometimes there is simply nothing to say, and the heart wants a retreat. And I guess that’s that.
I know of a similar movie – probably not the one that you are talking about.
The ending moves me.
I have never seen Jaws…the book was not that interesting either for me.
I liked what you said about subtle interactions. It reminds me of what P.Puppy once posted. Something along the lines of “Scorpio wants your unknown…and we will get it.”
Every line of that song asks..”Where is your passion…your essence? Are you dancing that passionate cosmic tango with me…all the way to surrender?”
That is why Jaws does not work for you perhaps?
Geez…there seems to be something going on with the planets. Its like I feel something in the air and …boy is it sizzling dark and zingy burning hot!
x. yes
there is.
i have tears rolling down my face
I’ll try to watch that at some stage, Gatubela.. People seem to have a preference of epic movies these days, and I grew up with Russian and French films and literature, which celebrate the intricate relating of the immediate situation… what happens between people when they engage, and the difficulty of reconciling our inner drives with what’s out there. Those feel much more intimate. For that reason I could never learn to watch the soaps, with their fast paced, jump betweeen the scenes format and the ‘in your face’ delivery. I prefer subtiled movies always, to the dubbed ones. Even without speaking a language – HOW the actors say things, intonations, then the movements, glances.. so much more important than words. The first American movie I ever watched was Jaws, believe it or not. I think I was sixteen at the time. I vividly remember leaving the cinema and thinking ‘I don’t know what it is that people like about American movies.’ It was a disappointment because it didn’t speak to me on any level, just addressing the base human reactions.. that’s why it probably made to the screens past the censorship, there was NOTHING in it to speak to the heart. And there was so much hu-ha around it with people, phew!!
Anyway, I haven’t switched on the TV once since August, and even than it was to watch the Opening Olympics ceremony, nothing for months before.
Umm… cry a little laugh a little, hey:)
Umm…
Nibbling on your hips sounds good tonight. But you know that would mean I would leave you screaming for more wonderful surprises, lol. Nothing gets a woman more giddy and in love, than original masculine surprises. And what do surprises mean to a woman?… They mean… the guy in her life is a dashing, thoughtful presence…and he is her tribal leader. He is not a passive ham, diddling and scratching his balls in life as a reflection of his attitude with life and women… let’s put it that way.
Smoked salmon on dark rye bread with mayo and lettuce. That’s my style of a cool lunch on a hot summer day. Iced tea too. Our Christmas’ down under are honestly flat and boring (socially and creatively) compared to the festive traditions revitalized in the U States each ‘Holiday’. I hear crickets chirping in the night, when I’d love to soak in Halloween and Thanksgiving. No comparison, ehh.
I don’t mind lamb soaked in garlic sauce either with a red wine and a glass of cold water. Add a crispy green salad, with Italian dressing and I’m one happy camper. But enough of the cooking channel…
Hey Umm… the topic of materialism is an interesting one.
You know, throughout your entire life and my life…. about 98% of all people we ever chat with and befriend, the conversation itself will funnel into and entail a materialistic bent. Literally and figuratively… we can’t escape that physical ground-mortal perception of life and it’s adopted meaning.The desirous and sensual planes of life through the eyes of ground-dwelling consciousness is a dimension we must work with, not against to find fulfillment in this body. It is also wise to not pride ourselves of knowing consciousness higher and deeper than the superficial material discussions (people) we engage in…. unless they ask, or are curious about that. Our minds must include…infuse it’s awareness through the game of superficiality to survive and prosper.
To me… there is no virtue in poverty.
There simply isn’t a feeling of fulfilling purpose for me personally to drift on the material plane and whine about not having what material pleasures others are having.
So with this belief as an intense part of my nature, there is another very subtle but very important distinction I wish to share.
Do you know what materialism means to me in my world?…
It means that when I observe and know people through engaging with them in my life, detached but superficially blissful… I know within minutes that these people who cannot talk about anything else BUT money, but image, but their work agenda, “their plans” to achieve, their frustrated relationship experiences,…their food, sex, movie preferences, their toys, shopping, machismo, their obsession with their looks, men acting as if women are sexual objects… all of these manifestations are ‘separate’ ego entities…
When I hear and see and feel those manifestations through their minds-eye… I know that my inner-worlds, my innate difference (Not a superficial perception of being different).. scares such people to insecurity. I know this because it happens often, if I choose to probe their fallacies.
The main sickness (or dire limitation) of soul not expresses in people.. through my felt vision… is that human beings functioning strictly at the material level…are slaves to the idea, that—> money is the root of all evil.
What I’m trying to say is–> THE LOVE of money… is the root of all evil. Not the money itself. Money is printed paper–> which is simply A TOOL, A TANGIBLE RESOURCE in aiding us create bounty and prosperity in our lives. Money is Nothing more. IT IS NOT A GOD, as the masses subconsciously ‘think’ with each other and have each other ‘believe’. Money, or the scarcity of it… controls the herd-consciousness… their choices in life.
In this practical “go=getter” world, people are obsessed with THE LOVE of what money brings to them. i.e … perceived as “trendy” and “in the loop” of all THINGS cool, popular, material… giving them higher prestige and titles among their flock. So nothing “is wrong” with prestige and titles… it’s just that people who LOVE money for that brittle self-image… are usually piss-poor morally as human… beings. Ya feel me?
So again, I always probe others with discernment. When life turns it’s devious ways to seduce and impress me, It really takes a God-like experience to impress me…but the paradox of all this is… I feel the God consciousness… I SEE it… in the mortal, everyday mind happening all the time, Funny, but true.
So… their is no virtue in being poor, to me either.
Their is no happiness in worshiping money ‘as your God’… either. This idea is depicted clearly in the movie 300. That movie shows us the beautiful contrast of what mans world REALLY IS–> a love, a worship of money, compared to what Gods work is–> immense love and bravery first as a human in humanity… then money will take care of the rest.
The love of money seduces people every waking moment. Just look all around you. They are humans of this world. But if you study the billionaires of this world, their attitudes towards, their feelings of money… you will notice their inner being is not a day-to-day slave to their money. They don’t strive in want. Those billionaires created their life… by administering and spreading their tons of money. IMPERMANENCE. As within.. so without. Their material resources increase by letting it go of the intense conformed belief that money is a God to hold and trick others with. Risking and giving. That created their fortunes.
They spread the tool of money, not as a noun, but yes, as another verb… exactly as that bearded guy did a couple thousand years ago who cast the loaves of bread to the masses.
What came back to him?
I am risking my fur answering your questions. LoL…I hope you will keep yer feathers fuzzy and snuggly.
Oh…the giver of eternal life? That is what the bread symbolizes for me. That masculine seed that surrendered to God – and sacred energy. The Source…
The crowd did not understand what he truly meant. They felt that it was just food – and not spirit / soul and the riches that this wonderful world generously gives.
It did not have any deeper meaning than a kilo of lemons for a salad.
The light did not protect him during his time on earth.
Light – transformative through detachment only, has lost that power, because truth means nothing .
“They felt that it was just food – and not spirit / soul and the riches that this wonderful world generously gives.”
A Leo, our Sun… truly knows what abundance on this earth IS. Leos know better than any other astrological nature HOW to enjoy life to the hilt.,And Taurus innately knows THE VALUE of it’s steadfast hard work… the Bull instinctively understands money like no other… they know plenty of tangible fruit is available to ALL of us. The harvest of earth’s bounty is granted to souls who have planted those fertile seeds, watered them, and nurtured them with love and faith… sans a premature harvest.
I dont know I wasnt there.
hmm christmas.. looms again. have no idea what i will be doing.probably nothing. be nice to spend it at the beach away from the fracas.
mm yum i love smoked salmon.. maybe with some avocado too. mm good in a salad as well with mango and macadamia nuts.
lamb and rosemary and sooo damned gd .. yum ill go the garlic sauce and wine..yummo.
what about dessert… mm i can make u lemon curdy pudding,mm with cream and ice-cream.. or strawberries, raspberries, blueberries, with mint and drizzled in an orange liqueur syrup..
mm my hips are ready. I can control my screams .might need your help though.
i know you are way beyond being a passive ham.you are not ham-like at all.although i would like to see you scratch your balls, just once, or at least fondle them.
yes money is just a tool..i have respect for it, but like you i see through the bullshit and how some people are fooled by their own creations with it.. i walked down the streets of sydney yesterday and its everywhere,, fashionistas and hipsters with fluff in their heads. not all of them fluff tho.but the vast majority.all busy going somewhere to go nowhere.. alot of identifying what is only outside of them other than in them.us humans are a crazy lot.. we struggle and flounder and deep down know we are all just specks really. some just sparkle more ..
“..although i would like to see you scratch your balls, just once, or at least fondle them.”
Fondle the pillow I threw at your face. Take that fluff, bratty;)
ow , i dont want to fondle the pillow. its on the floor.
fluff shmuff
im sorry Pluto. was bit rude of me.. not sure what came over me..
There is no hate. There was confusion. Love. Admiration. Illusion. Feelings. Sadness. Desire. Misunderstanding. Defensiveness. There has never really been hate.
I accepted the wholeness of all those. I am a woman.
Umm, this is actually my favourite song by Bjork ‘Play Dead’ She is a Scorpio, of course. I seem to have an instinctive liking for the songs of Scorpio female indie artists.
youtube.com/watch?v=CHiHZ35TPfM
Gatubela, I couldn’t watch it, and there was no link in the email. If you paste the link and take out the http and www from the address, it will post without embedding, and we will be able to copy and paste it into the browser… (see like I did above, below the video?)
yeh she is a triple scorp . sun and moon and rising, and with her other dominant signs in her chart being virgo and capricorn.she feels it when she feels it, its in every cell of her body .I saw her live once she is gorgeous. remember hyper ballad? “..every morning i walk towards the edge and throw little things off.. like car parts , bottles and cutlery or whatever i find lying around,, its become a habit a way to start the day.i go through all this before you wake up, so I can feel happier, to be safe again with you..”
He says (5 minutes into it) ‘To speak the truth is easy and pleasant’… but when we speak the truth in the face of big and small bureaucratic establishments, on all levels, commercial, state, even religeous – we pay the price. He did. Something happens to people when they become part of a group. Every group becomes corrupt eventually, and corrupts its members.And the members lose all sense of values (that is if they have any to begin with).
youtube.com/watch?v=0td1XNs3NUQ&feature=BFa&list=PL5F53D266E7688852
..”Where is your passion…your essence? Are you dancing that passionate cosmic tango with me…all the way to surrender?”
I have danced….. and will do this any time again… if a man is who he says he is (and does). I have not found such a man. Doesn’t matter. I am at peace, even when emotions enter, even when my mind tries to play with me – I know how to balance it now. It doesn’t stay long. Surrender to self first.
Yes, Scorpio Sun, Mercury and Moon now. The energy is deep, I feel it too.
REALITY OF THE REAL
Droopy breasts and chattering mind,
Period pains and pads left behind,
Nightly sweat, sometimes bad breath.
See my unusual way to impress?
**
Mood swings and dislike of jelly,
A locked up and cupboarded telly,
A heart able to love and to hate.
Are you getting this attractive bait?
**
Underarm growth (forgotten to shave),
Wanting to kill you, for you misbehave,
No trimmed pussy for lack of sex,
An unusually caring devoted ex.
**
Tasteful style and compassionate eyes,
In heat of passion no orgasmic cries.
Sure, please do search for your ideal,
And I will remain earthly me – REAL.
—————-
haha… in the midst of talk about human divinity this came upon me.
I understood now that poetry is TRUTHFUL. Why? Because there is only ONE condition under which it is possible to write it. The Heart Condition. Poems do not get born out of lies.
The epigraph for Master and Margarita book reads ‘Manuscripts don’t burn’. Meaning (for me) – what is written from the heart is eternal. The Truth. Can never be destroyed.
Hi Ines,
You made me laugh in the middle of all of my problems. What???!!! No Trimming? Are you an angora bunny?
(youtube.com/watch?v=YpdqxgeO5J0)
Here is the link without the www.
youtube.com/watch?v=xcy5HH-8A7Q
Its about how delicate this dance really is, in the darkness. For example, that song that you posted by Bjork, does not contemplate this ancient beauty.
Ahahahaa!! Gatubela, your angora bunnies!!! In that context…. can’t stop laughing!!!!
Hmmmm… silky luxurious fur carpet at the cave entrance.. it gets attention, just not daily. I was talking ‘worst case scenario’ LOL I wrote that in one breath, then read it and laughed myself. Nothing wrong with a bit of playfulness (Venus in your sunny fifth house?), I have been so serious for so long, am loosening up now:)
I love that song you posted and that ‘delicate how eyes so delicately breathe’, by God, please someone UNDERSTAND that!!!!! It takes true
feminity to delicately dance through the inevitable adversities (the darkness you mention), without destroying each other’s soul. Argh….
Bjork song is about HIDING IN that darkness.. someone so closed off that the pain is self perpetuated and spilling into another, embraced in a state of self pity, rather than wanting to confront it. The first step of Plutonic evolution. I love the music in it, music for me comes first, before the lyrics, it’s very primeval and talks directly to the emotional centre, very PHYSICAL for me, must be my Taurus Moon. Actualy…. hmmmm… I could never make love with any kind of music in the background. It distracts me. It has to be SILENT. While lyrics are mediated modality, delayed in their processing (that left temporal lobe, the culprit). music for me is not an everyday part of my life, because it is emotive and puts me into ‘states’. It’s a medicine or a poison, depending….
The carpet at the gate doesn’t get any traffic LOL Fuck it, Gatubela, you put me in a mischievous mood!! Sorry!
I love music. Each song is a treasure to explore. I listen to it, because I can feel.
Music is not another person….a person for me, can be a melody.
(youtube.com/watch?v=f7FNBUVnRBw)
think im the same when it comes to music.. the music comes first before lyrics.. yes its soo primeval ,you get it. mm and when its goes straight to the core.. and yeah the emotional and physical are perfectly aligned..to me that is the ultimate. ahh im getting tingles! Radiohead were amazing the other night,so fucking brilliant, they really are incredible musicians,technically and emotionally..they understand and FEEL music. i was in heaven..
Today is exactly one year to the day when I left my first comment here… Externally it was not an eventful year, but internally – akin to going into the desert, burning under the hot sun, thirsty, gasping for cool air and water, yet determined to stay until the fantasms of the desert mirage give way to clarity. And we are like celestial bodies… who can demand of the Sun to burn brighter, or the Moon to reflect the light stronger, or Saturn to lose its rings? Are they going to listen to us? It is ridiculous to even suggest that. Why then do we feel that we can ask of another human, another little universe, to change the course for us? This realisation is so poignant, hmmm.. I am going to make this into a song I think.
oh wow Ness, i love it, i want to hear it, you inspire me.. x
Umm… I have a confession to make, and it has been bothering me since we started talking. Please don’t go mad. In January I nosed around the net and found you. My Scorpionic investigative skills, Piscean curiosity (we are Neptune in Scorpio generation, right?) plus Virgo attention to detail, hey… And of course, in my insecure at the time state of being I immediately made comparisons (something we should never, EVER do), I saw a beautiful, a very talented woman and felt tiny in myself, yeah… Umm, you live your life in the way you see fit, free and uninhibited, and who cares that we all go through phases of being unsure and emotional and wanting to love and feel loved. It’s
the flow of life which doesn’t make us weak… or freak LOL BTW, my full name is Inessa, a Russian version of French/Spanish Ines.. all those come from Agnes – lamb.
I have been learning to play the guitar since March this year, not because of anything, but my son got a guitar birthday present (his dad plays), and it just so happened that I was charged enough emotionally to have a go. You can do it much better I am sure. Then a couple of melodies came, from fooling around with the chords. Then recently I started writing those poems, and I don’t even read poems (used to as a teenager, sigh). I am crap at singing, in that I have the ear, but not a good voice. It is not good enough to share with the masses, haha… but for me to FEEL and to BE and to nurture my state of being. The point is… I am feeding my soul, it is what works for me now, this creativity which was dormant for a lifetime and is now gashing out. And I always wondered why they say Pisceans are creative, blah blah, and I CONSCIOUSLY denied it, always wondering about this ‘lack of’ in me. Creativity comes through love, and I don’t mean necessarily romantic. Just being in that state of love. And creativity is a state of living, for we can be creative in how we approach EVERYTHING we do… Hey, I could write lyrics and you could do the music… and paint to boot!! Gatubela, will you sing? Hmm… here we have a soulful band:)
Actually, this thought makes me quite cheerful, don’t know why. You know… I am here now because of you beautiful ladies… I climbed out of the dungeon, and there you were, nurtured me to love… it’s so bloody amazing. And that’s true inspiration for me. And my second song is coming up good, I even like it myself.
“a person for me, can be a melody.”
That’s beautiful, Gatubela, really made me want to steal it. Can I?
This is the song in the making now… Quite flowing and major in tone, music wise. It’s in G key.
LITTLE STREAM
The river of life had begun its flow
long before I joined its rocky motion.
How come this Maker didn’t even know
that all rivers eventually run into Ocean?
**
It conceived as an innocent stream by a tree,
bubbling happily own watery song.
Mistrust and fear, of those toxic chemicals free,
it started a beautiful journey to Avalon.
**
Little rivers still young, but mightily high
through innocent beliefs of fluid mortality,
of never stopping to run, exhausted and dry,
caught in the bubble of own reality.
**
Earthly gravity was a clever refinement
following the given route; groovy!
Softly manoeuvred into cosy confinement
the stream felt it was running its own movie,
**
until it reached the steepest of waterfalls
through the icy blue mists of confusion.
Within reach of the fatherly Ocean which calls
to step over the limits of known illusion.
**
Jump, little stream, much to taste and to give
in the unknown freedom to flow and roam.
The stream enters the threshold, jumps and sighs in relief
not a stream, but a river and finally home.
——————
I promise I will stop posting those soon.
Umm… put it down on canvas… now when you burn and feel – is the time. With abandon, a masterpiece of emotion. x
About passion and how it translates to art… I used to hang with a group of artists in Moscow, I was young, good looking and spoke English, unlike most of them. They were an intelligent crowd, sold their watercolours to foreign tourists in the Red Square to make a living, early days of post communism, so the police didn’t bother them much. One of them became my lover, it wasn’t love, but just mutual appreciation and that bohemian lifestyle we shared: painting, singing (one artist was married to a guy from a semi famous rock band), philosophy talks till the early hours of the morning, drinking, no drugs at all, remember Russia was still innocent then… He painted a couple of portraits of me. We parted, just drifted off, met a few months later, he said ‘Come and look at my collection. I am selling off’ I sked why. He said ‘you brough me luck. The day when we were supposed to meet and never did, I was at the square, and there was a group of American tourists, and I saw a girl among them,nothing special, but I was done there and then. We started talking, and it was love at first sight. I am leaving with her to the US.’
Anyway, a guy from an art gallery turned up for the appraisal, to choose which pictures to buy. And guess what…. the ones that he really wanted and said were a masterpiece – were his paintings of her. Not mine, not any others. Her. There was something about them, he was in love, and it translated into those with full force. And the artist didn’t want to part with those, he said ‘Choose anything else, these are not for sale.’ There.
They did move to America, and we lost contact.
love speaks so strong.. . i know straight up with my own art, whether it be painting or music when its speaking and when its not.. if its not flowing out its a struggle..and i usually dont bother with it for too long ..i cant fake it.if its not there fuck it its not there.i try sometimes.. and get pissed off.. im very critical of my work.. and when all that shit is happening its cos im not trusting the flow.. trusting my own feelings.. just fear bullshit.does my head in sometimes. but then when it comes it really comes.maybe thats the highs and lows that need to be there.. i dont wanna be all pilled up and numb and evened out. thats passionless to me.
your experience in Russia sounds very creative and interesting.there are so many great russian artists..marc chagall..kandinsky ..
ive been playing guitar for hours the last few days!.. doing alot of recording at the moment.going to bed really late etc.. yeh i am feeling so much at the moment…hard to contain.
your song little stream.. i have goosebumps and this is for real.the words.. its hit home like you wouldnt believe. i feel like you are expressing what is deep inside me.. if that makes sense! words don’t come to me easily, but sound does..
ive been mucking around with dropped D tunings.. i really like the easterny kind of sounds you can get and with open fingerpicking ..and then finding random chords in completely different shapes than the standard tunings.then layering upon them.
i am thinking of getting singing lessons again..want to get stronger in my voice . do you sing while you play?
My experiences in Russia were totally mad and a roller coaster ride. Amidst the collapsing state, the chaos of every door suddenly open, the wild West mentality taking hold instantly, the tanks rolling the wide avenues of Moscow, the brutality of mafia… I didn’t get involved directly, but my Irish ex – did. Through him I slowly peeled off the layers of my innocence. The puppy mind is gone forever. maybe I can rescue my soul instead.
Umm, I do sing while playing, feebly huh. The Little Stream was written in October. I have a good melody for it, soulfully catchy refrain ‘Wanting….. to merge’ and then at the end ‘Merging… finally home’ , but it’s raw, no fancy editing gimmicks, I wouldn’t know where to start……Sigh… Umm, if any of these speak to you – take them and write a song, do you write songs? I have plenty where it’s coming from:) Six months is NOTHING in terms of skill. It’s just that I always have to make things my own. I was excited when I played the first proper song (Jamaica Fairwell, haha!), but then got bored and started experimenting, and as far as I am concerned – I have a lifetime to do so. It is for my non commercially viable soul:)
I feel what’s inside you, Umm, because it feels like I carry that same stuff. Interesting that our Sun, Moon and Ascendant are both two Earths and one Water. unfortunately, like you said, if it becomes evened out, flat, unemotional – the art stops. I know exactly what you mean. The art is born out of passion and charge, INSPIRATION. There has to be something within that INSPIRES. So I say ‘unfortunate’ because…. a PERMANENT still mind and a state of serenity (for me) mean no inspiration. Damn it, a lot of art is born from the inner aggravation of some kind… strong feelings from which to express. It’s a compulsion, isn’t it, like you feel you cannot NOT do it. And I am not even an artist, I just have an artistic soul, if that makes sense. Hmmm.. actually… I always felt why do I not have that in me, but the truth is (if I am honest with myself) – I never gave myself a chance. I was learning to play the piano (I wanted to so badly), the teacher said I was very good – gave up, too much practice. I tried to learn to play the guitar at 19 – gave up, didn’t like the pain, just couldn’t cope. Used to write poems – gave up. I am a University dropout – TWICE. I always gave up. Only in the last five years I got enough mettle in me to stick things out. I took an easy way out (practice? what practice?). So I became good at many things and exceptional – in none. A generalist. Sure, inspiration is only the starting point, hard work is what gives it body… And then I never thought I was good enough (like you say you are critical of your work). While in reality.. we are only critical when we imagine someone else looking at it. If you only paint or record for yourself, for your own expression, without a hint of consideration of others – it will ALWAYS feel good to us. Like that analogy of being on a desert island – everything becomes good enough, because it’s only you to love and to judge everything. And then others will pick up on it. The art only works because when an artist expresses something very intimate, personal to them – he/she in fact expresses universal states of being so familiar to the rest of us. We see it, or hear it, and know that we FELT THE SAME at some stage in our life. It resonates, and we fall in love with that art.
Recording… sounds so professional, how do you do it? I recorded the first song with Audacity and Pro Sound mic, and didn’t even edit. And a cheapy £70 (110 of your Aussie dollars) guitar. School project setup:)
Umm.. thank you. If it resonates with others… it means I am true. It is interesting how for me it all boiled down to creativity, because it WAS one issue I always grappled with and questioned myself on. Shocking.
yes i write songs.. havent written words for a while. just the music really. sometimes i just come up with stuff as i am playing and messing around with it..
i have been using a portable device at the moment which has a great sound. other than that i use logic pro.you can get good recordings without editing. i am still quite new to it all, its a big learning curve.
i can relate to the giving up stuff.. something ive done too..sometimes i guess i just feel overwhelmed by life and societal perceived expectations etc etc..its all self defeating.and digs me into a hole. its all just in my head. sometimes i just want to do NOTHING and just be.during those times i like complete quiet and no distractions and just want to find a nice quiet comfy place and take it easy.no stress, no pressures nothing to get out or do or say.just some nice food and a comfy bed.i guess i go through high and low energy periods.feel like im in a low one today.I didnt get much sleep last night though , stayed at a gf’s house and her dog wanted to spoon me which i thought great at first but then she had her head on my hip most of the night, then stretched her legs so i was half off the bed hehe
“La sciate Ogne Speranza voi ch’entrale.”
Abandon all hope, ye who enter here.
See, Umm… that above is from Dante Alighieri ‘Divine Comedy’, an inscription above the gates into hell. Is worth contemplating. I have released, and when we do… we become untouchable, an elevation onto a different level where nobody, but us, has power. Where the light becomes brighter, and the dark loses its deep shade… and feels even cute… Argh.. sweet freedom….
Here’s a little spitfire bunny. This is real world stuff.
She hasn’t felt sexually/psychologically vulnerable from a male mind presence. EVER. Which is why she has a mouth on her. Still she’s entertaining none the less. This is the classic bunny who TESTS men with rapid fire. And men always fail.
wow what drew you to that?
i switched off from what she was ranting in the first minute..
What drew you to find her Pluto?
It’s an example of what the superficial female mind IS among us, in this world we live in. You do live in this world, don’t you?? Or are you too good for that? Your flustered narrow minded criticisms in the past are no different than hers Umm. The sum and substance of what you think in an average day isn’t much deeper than what her constant inner monologue.is perceiving and yapping. She’s just brave enough to speak her inner monologue to everyone regardless if she’s bat shit crazy. Same could be said for tens of millions of women and what they stress and cry about over their entire lives = Petty Stuff = Their obsessions with appearance, which rolls meaning into their insecurities of being alone or without friends and real connection… rolling into their fears of being irrationally afraid of inconsequential circumstances, running from themselves in an anti-spiritual existence…and a litany of other ridiculous illusions which exist among the collective/brainwashed mortal mind. You yourself speak of dinner, food, obvious physical topics, and surfing and music so that’s fine… yet there is not much else within your personality, your divinity, that can express with me personally beyond that. I know this because I know your mental nature is relentlessly focused on problems rather than solutions and expansion and integration and happiness in the present
Umm, you like her, like most women alive, live in a subjective neurotic paradise–> which comforts you from your real existential fears. Which means your perceived world is very small (in my world). Don’t get upset with me… it’s the truth. I don’t meet Buddha women with strength, poise, emotional wisdom, sex appeal, mystery and humor everywhere I travel. That was my earlier point. We live in a social world with a mixture of everyone’s deflective projections happening at the surface level. Which all means a huge void of self-knowledge. We are NOT immune from what this world actually is, if we cant’ discern. I appreciate women who at least do speak openly. And women who are slightly dangerous on subconscious levels. But sincerity is another thing. I need sincerity to trust any woman. I’m quick to know if sincerity is absent in a woman’s mind. You have been sincere so that’s no problem. When I encounter women like the tiresome little brat in that video whom craves a social/intimate challenge from men in general, but she does not get that gut level chemistry. It’s all swirling around at her surface. Which again is to be expected as it does for almost every 30ish woman. Which is why she’s a drunk retard with the immaturity of an adult male. Exceptional males have not penetrated her on emotional levels so she feels no inner connection with men beyond her lunacy and narcissism and the endless needs for outer approval proven in her videos.
Our connection Umm, sorry to say… has always been flat and dead-ended.
Peace;)
Peace?? go fuck yourself! always flat and dead ended huh?? so i talked about food what so fucking wrong with that? we all eat. its NICE jeez you went into your own descriptions and then went on your usual tangent about money etc etc heard it all before .. thats not to say i have never agreed with it.. but you repeat the same stuff- so what? i dont give a rats cos i know who you are.. and you have nothing to fucking prove to me.. no i don’t know all of you dont worry.. but im not going to sit here and just regurgitate back to you what you already know.and i know. dead ended.. yeh cos you couldnt take it beyond that. you totally know what i mean so dont try and slink out of this one Pluto.”mutually real” –remember that? so how fucking real can you get? EXACTLY! and this isn’t your forum for fucks sake and if i want to talk about art surfing and music i bloodywell can and what is that makes you feel so damned uncomfortable.. ask me something if you want to go further.. you are so hungry you dont know what to do with yourself..i GET you Pluto i always have .. just cos i dont go on into lengthy discussions about concepts of what YOU DONT HAVE.. cos this is all about you . and what you dont have . poor you. well you’re not the only one. so SUCK IT UP BABY!!!!
you haven’t even met me so dont you DARE go comparing me to that soulless bimbo.you are tripping over your toenails gurruuu ..subjective neurotic paradise?? what tha ???? and what do you do for kicks huh?? oh yeh… hmm, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA cos you share BUBKUS about that. you like lamb with garlic sauce , you like trolling you tube to try and figure out why those blonde bimbos you meet with those tits you want in your mouth dont get you and walk away,yeh you like to be a prick just for the hell of it cos you’re bored. nice one. way to go bruno.
and whose the one that is doing flustered narrow minded criticisms?? hey??? thats right- yOU ARE. SOOooo you are essentially a hypocrite- hippo-criiiTTT. and you think you know my mental nature do you?? focusing on problems?? where the fuck have you been?? you must be kidding me! I have been here to give and learn etc etc just like you Pluto. i just do it my own way.. like i said before, you want something more?? well you damned well know what to do so dont go all clueless on me or box me up cos you cant deal with it.you talk about TESTS.. hmm funny isnt it.i wasnt born yesterday. hmm if i recall as well you value silence. who’s silence? yours?? or the whole worlds? when it suits you cos you’re feeling abandoned. you want to see who i really am?? you wanna get personal???? you dont need me to tell you what you already know.WORDS DONT DO IT JUSTICE. did you fucking forget?
ill send you the bill 😉
“..subjective neurotic paradise?? what tha ???? and what do you do for kicks huh?? oh yeh… hmm, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA cos you share BUBKUS about that. you like lamb with garlic sauce , you like trolling you tube to try and figure out why those blonde bimbos you meet with those tits you want in your mouth dont get you and walk away,yeh you like to be a prick just for the hell of it cos you’re bored. nice one. way to go bruno.
and whose the one that is doing flustered narrow minded criticisms?? hey??? thats right- yOU ARE. SOOooo you are essentially a hypocrite- hippo-criiiTTT”…
Yeah… you really sound nothing like her.
That explosion was the neurotic little paradise I was talking about. The real, unconscious you… has finally stepped forward. Thank you.;)
This is what being true to myself and honest produces when I attract possessive women lost in low self-esteem. Age, looks has nothing to do with fearfulness.
Peace and
Be well;)
you weren’t being true and honest, you were attacking me. you really hate women dont you.all you have to do is control that penis of yours. simple
no you werent being true and honest you were attacking me. all i did was ask you what drew you to her.and you attacked me, you being hypersensitive thought i was attacking you so you got defensive and then took it out on me, and then when i got angry in response to your bullying you then took that and “used” it as your example to categorize me in your narrow-minded, generalised viewpoint of women. if anyone needs healing here its you. also i just want to add..it might be helpful for you to not take yourself so seriously and have a laugh here and there.get off that high horse .you are far from perfect like most humans here on this earth. be humble
I would need an old soul, an autonomous woman, with the sexual wealth of a goddess and the mind/heart of a visionary on many interpersonal levels in a 28 year old body? Do you know anyone like that? hahah.
I need a COMPELLING woman. Her energy must draw me in to her. Yet the women who have drawn me energetically are only at the lusty, sexually intoxicating level… aka strippers and sexual women in general. The wholeness of my desired woman (written above) is non-existent. She doesn’t exist.
I expect a lot because I understand that I am a lot to deal with and understand.
Hence me showing the video of the neurotic girl perceiving her empty life to the world, which so many people can laugh at and identify with;)
yeh and i need a COMPELLING man.
one that can surrender to his fears of not being accepted, who is complete in himself who doesnt need to constantly search for outside justification of who he is.who doesnt play games.who can be personal without fear of loss of himself. who sees beyond the surface fluff of things, who isnt obsessed with image and status and prestige, who is REAL and has DEPTH, and isnt sucked in by the plastic bullshit and knows who he is and what really makes him happy and has the courage to make it happen.who can be REAL. did i say that already? yes i think i did. who has FUCKING GUTS.who draws me to him energetically through his sexual/spiritual/wise old soul self. who doesnt soley rely on words to express who he is.who can LOVE and isnt afraid to go to there.yes that is fucking intoxicating.for me. not just sex. BIG difference.
you truly aren’t too much to deal with and understand . maybe when you realise THAT , then she will exist. but……. are you ready for that?hmm .
Thanks for the kind expression, but forcing the passion out of you isn’t the natural you. Mocking what I’ve given to you through my soul, is not the right fit for either of us.
Share your true-self with males who actually want to be possessed and manipulated:)
There’s plenty of options out there for you Umm, but you have to get social and aware before you’d realize that;)
what is your problem with me all of a sudden? a few days ago you were saying its a pleasure to have me here.. then now you have turned on me? why are you giving me such a hard time? what have i done to upset you so much that you feel you have to be so nasty and spiteful to me? and please can you stop with the generalisations.they are getting really old..
you didnt have to force the passion out of me.. you just wanted a reaction .. something to show you how i felt.you felt left out you felt alone , and bored and whatever.so you thought you would throw a little grenade in a and sit back and see what happens.. well done, you got what you were hoping for/expected.where does that leave you now?I am not out to possess and manipulate anyone so seriously please cut the crap.its BORING. i know there are plenty of options out there for me thanks.i really dont need you tell me what i am worth.
you know what? thanks.. really.
now i have the truth of what you feel towards me .
you are right. forcing anything is unnatural. i fucked up. listen im sorry i hurt you earlier. i felt impatient and i was feeling what i was feeling and didnt feel like talking anymore. i never doubted your ability to be a man. i never wanted you to feel like you had to show me more. but you didnt feel it from me. . you didnt feel the passion i had which was always there in the silence and the limited words i shared.that actually makes me really sad. i truly hope you find what you are looking for.x
I wrote this a few weeks ago, while being in the most desolate state. In retrospect…. every verse released something inside and brought me closer to myself. Was worth it.
FIBREOPTICS COITUS
Late; lying sleepless in bed,
mentally running my private fables.
How can the feelings be fed
through fast fibre optics cables?
**
In this new world of no faces,
absence of human touch and voice.
Sucked into spider web of virtual places,
the inconceivable truth of modern choice.
**
Lines on the screen, translated
into both moist vagina and cortex.
I am spell bound and hate it,
the full emptiness of this vortex.
**
If all has been a simple banality
of an internet chess, with no risk taken,
why does it so resemble reality,
why on Earth do I feel forsaken?
**
Keyboards and plugs and monitors,
the completeness of space aggravation.
This monstrosity of a computer coitus,
a soul and body dissociation.
i like this one Ness.
Wow…….
Umm…. Dragons will always be hungry in us and others, it comes and it GOES. It LEAVES. Don’t feed it. You are more than that. You are the queen, remember? You know who you are, why giving that power away? That’s what I was trying to say a bit way back. The darkenss has its lovable hues.
Release. x
sorry Ness but you dont understand whats going on here.
HA!
LOL… you made me laugh!!! I get the the funny side of it!! Memories, hey…
YUP
oh and pluto.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY !
oops got the day wrong.
yeh im far from perfect
“dead ended.. yeh cos you couldnt take it beyond that.”
He COULD, just didn’t WANT to.. Umm, I know you are hurt, but I just can’t stop laughing… remember you can’t ask Saturn to lose its rings? No, damn it, it’s hilarious, and by saying that I also laugh at myself!!!! I wonder when JoJo comes back from her private tour, hahahahaaaaa!
Sorry, ladies…. just can’t help it, and honestly. no malice intended. Can you just see the incomprehensible eternal humour of it all? I can LOL
TRUE AND FALSE
There was nothing in it false
And it wasn’t a heartless delivery,
But again the bell loudly tolls
Gather your strength and bravery.
**
A remarkable display of ability
To stir the hornet’s nest of feeling.
The probing of true femininity
By the masculine super being.
**
It was not a fair comparison
of the artist and the blond gender,
But response troubled and worrisome,
No question of true surrender.
**
And perhaps it will only be
From a heart unchained by desire.
Proud, wholesome and free
Even in those straights dire.
just wrote a whole page and lost it
yeah i am fearful .i am strangled and numbed by it.
shit .. i am really tired i can’t be fucked rewriting the whole thing again.maybe tomorrow
“you know what? thanks.. really.
now i have the truth of what you feel towards me .”
Umm…. that’s NOT really the point. What does he feel towards you? Does it really matter much? You see… I have been on both sides of the fence (as you know)… It is easy to be nice and pleasant when no one rubs us the wrong way, but when they do – see what happens… latent negativity, defensiveness, an opposing stance… You questioned what the problem is suddenly… it has always been there. In the past, if you remember I chose to ignore many of your comments – for that reason. And you felt disrespected, as you said then. No. I didn’t disrespect you. I didn’t want to react to those comments which were based on your reactions. But you were subdued and undemanding enough WITH THE MAN to stay under the line of fire. But it wasn’t the true you really. Now you wanted something enough to play for it, and that’s the problem. When I say ‘play’… fondling someone’s balls is a suggestion of wanted intimacy WITHOUT being direct about it, and about the feelings that come with it. Yes, yes, I know… flirting and all that… I am actuallly not too good with it… but ‘normal’ rules do not apply here AT ALL. And you are you, maybe you are not the one to discuss things at length, like I do, which would really show your inner workings, and that’s fine, as long as you are FULLY PRESENT. I can only obviously talk about the exchanges here, not anywhere else.
You know…. my Cassandra syndrome… I wondered when this will happen LONG BEFORE, may be eight months ago:( I mean you and the man…
He was direct and told you it’s not gonna happen, even in that first post “But you know that would mean I would leave you screaming for more wonderful surprises, lol.” I saw it. Others, I am sure, did. Unfortunately, we are selectively blind when is comes to infatuation with someone.
Can you now gently walk away from that without feeling bitter and angry and mad and upset and hate….etc…etc.. No? Can you look inside of yourself and see why what was said – hit you so hard? Or you can stay like me and fall to pieces before you realise that to love and to be a SLAVE to love are two different things. If it makes you feel any better – I know how you feel and trust me – THE RELEASE is there if you look for it. You were chained for long enough, Umm. Way back a couple of years.
Hug
dont hug me, dont patronise me. i really dont appreciate what you have to say. i havent asked for your opinion. in fact i inferred before for you to stay out of it. again you have disrespected me.like you did way back .
yeh public forum. simple flirt.whatever. now i am being bullied. i dont need this shit in my life.
Umm… I
was hoping you will see past your anger and hurt, but obviously not, sigh…. it wasn’t an ‘opinion’, and I didn’t want to patronise you at all. I honestly told you why I didn’t get engaged with you in the past. Do you want me to be brutally honest with you? I didn’t sense the true surrender state from you, although I am grateful for your recent support, I truly am. In fact, there are ONLY two women I believe who qualify: Gatubela and Mari. Not JoJo either. Because you ladies (like me in the past) CHASED YOUR OWN AGENDA – THE MAN, and I was full of that shit myself. It was a perspective of someone who walked in those shoes you are now wearing, and don’t they feel tight? That gentle Umm who spoke about love and surrender… You cannot keep your cool in the face of adversity, and the mask of pleasantry comes off, no? So do you do this every time when you perceive something as a slight? Is this how you ‘solve’ everything?
Bullying… censorship??? Come on…. this smacks of paranoia born out of massive insecurities.. I feel I am a bit qualified here to say that:) I repeat…. censorship?????
And I wanted to talk music with you, huh…
Umm…. you can walk away, but I’d rather you stayed.
We create our own shit.
This was written about two months ago and has been made into a song, with a slightly ominous melody.
PLUTO’S SEVENTH CIRCLE.
Heads turn, conversations pause when he steps in the hall.
Pluto drew the seventh circle at the time of his birth,
Left its signature snarl, or could it have been a curse?
The temperature rises, a rush of blood to the face, then it falls.
**
While he is patiently scanning the landscape of present souls,
Wondering which one will walk through the gates of Hell
And emerge on the other side free from the sweltering well,
Which one can step tenderly and barefoot on smouldering coals?
**
He walked the globe with that determination of a hunter,
Touching and smelling the filth and turning it into gold
Of precious wisdom nuggets and plentiful coins; so bold
And dangerously serious he looks, no light-hearted bunter.
**
He doesn’t withhold the mysterious self, nor does he bestow.
His gifts are aplenty, to be shared with the honoured few.
He will mightily scare your heart only if you are scared of you.
But the freedom of facing your own fear has an unusual glow.
**
As he stood there, what was going through his mind?
Through the painful journeys he gained worldly wisdom and grace.
Magnificent Plutonian inside and out, yet with no one to embrace,
Softly and silently loved by the sacred Union of another kind.
———————–
It’s Pluto Time:)
well it looks like a few posts of mine haven’t even been put up.
thats censorship for you. welcome to the real world. happy birthday pluto.
bye
Umm
Some time in September I sent an email in which I asked to forgive me for the betrayal, because it was betrayal, or this is how it feels to me. I didn’t expect anything back.
And today I sent the recording as my way of saying ‘thank you’ for waking me up, and especially my creativity, even if it’s only for me. I don’t want anything back.
I now feel free from the chains of obsession. And I just want to take the time off from here.
I am sorry we couldn’t discuss music, I was interested in what you write.
Be well
i didnt get the recording. like i said.. censorship on here..who knows.dont worry about it. keep playing. .yeh we were talking about music.thats cool. pluto just decided to pull the lead out of the amp and pour water on it. its drying out it’ll be fine.
catcha later
Gatubela,
Before I take my break… I want to say I truly appreciate your state of surrender to love. It is very easy to say ‘sorry’ to those we want something from, and to send all others to hell, isn’t it… While the true surrender state does not discriminate. That’s how I know you are true. You have never applied a different treatment to different people here. All equally respected. And I love you for it.
Please accept my apology for all my past rudeness and defensiveness and being an asshole. Your patience and love is truly remarkable.
Love
Ness
Hi Ines,
Hahaha! No, I am not always patient and loving.
I don´t have the “power” to TRULY discriminate, because in the way you say it, you always miss the VERB.
To Discriminate (infinitive) is a societal verb to describe what ? There is no REAL action going on, when we just keep that verb as far as our noses will go, and as fast as our heads will turn to look the other way.
We can´t “judge” other people´s true intentions in the Truth of why they do the things they do, or the poems they write, or the songs they sing.
I would love to see that placed on those cosmic scales. But, unfortunately, most of us, will only see (I mean, FEEL) those cosmic scales when we die.
The last time someone told me he was sorry, he was on his knees, begging for my forgiveness and telling me that he would do anything. Then he made me suffer only more, when he saw the incredible “power” he had to dominate me, by taking advantage of my LACK of action. Or rather, I sold myself (dignity, identity and soul) for ” a hug” and “words”…becasue essentially, and unconsciously, an accepted sorry (another half ass verb) will only be perceived as a sign of my own cowardice and weakness to what the fuck I really did not want to “KNOW”, and did not have the strength to do something about, in the first place.
Ignorance is a snuggle sometimes.
LoL.
,
Perhaps discriminate is not the word to use. And perhaps words do not come into it at all. How does one describe a deep gratitude? And a
deep regret? I can only feel that state, accept it and attempt (yes, attempt, isn’t it all we try?) to live by it = the verb. To not repeat the same pattern of falling into the abyss every time things do not go according to ‘plan’. There is no plan for the soul, is there?
And we are constantly tested by life’s circumstances, and what am I made of? That would be the verb of my apology – out there, in the mess and imperfection of it all. What am I made of?
And Gatubela… aside from your life expereinces… how you personally treat people here IS your VERB. It’s enough for me, for I cannot judge (and wouldn’t want to) for anything else outside of this little corner.. I don’t claim for any of us to have a halo. Not at all.
No pressure. Just life.
Yes, I do feel that there is a plan for the soul…and the abyss is for when things go “right” according to plan, and not “wrong” and not as planned.
If I can feel a soul, then negating it, would be like the ultimate meanieness! I don´t feel we could do worse than that. But we do it – everyday, right?
As a society, and on an individual level, we handle ourselves on a daily basis, better in the crap we waddle in than in heart and soul. Actually, if I handle myself in heart and soul, I get death threats, or abuse. My rules seem to be in reverse and I just can´t get it right.
A soul does not mean super unconditionality by the way -no rules etc. The abyss if proof of that. Scorpio is very much in tune with this energy. Otherwise, if it were all free unconditional, not do the soul work love, we would just “wish” ourselves and “access” would be granted. Things don´t happen out of the blue and we are not exactly powerless in the abyss. Those sacred gifts are only for the brave and the fearless.
I know that pisces energy is very go with the flow. Actually, I do have this problem. Well…maybe everything is perceived as “go with the flow” according to scorpio! Like people are too relaxed. If there is no deadly release, through transformative action, then it is time to leave, for them.
Scorpionic energy – it does not let not let one microscopic, subatomic, quantum pariticle soul go. All the way from death to the other side of the barrier – something eternal.
I guess that is where those seeds can be found.
Well first off… Gatubela doesn’t have the ambushed irritations of 15 swooning women pecking at her heartstrings and other things, like a ferocious cloud of hungry-horny swans. You wily vixens have the bottomless appetite of a Black Moon Lilith pissed off in her hey-day.
So spare me how good you’ve all been.
Too bad Lilith… this battle-tested, bulletproof Eagle is not about to be devoured by the abyss riddled longings anytime soon. You have to understand that in the Eagle’s laser intensity for eternal freedom– he is the abyss. You are his guest. He sits on the eggs remember?… aaannnd he does the hunting and slaughtering too. So don’t hate the versatility. The happenstance of our verb for years here, is that you’ve all taken a swim with me in this cosmic ocean of death to some degree. So as you’ve all felt and seen… It is the only way to know this human life.
Just once… I would love to see women, sharp starlets… handle dopey, cunning, clumsy, sex horn-dog stupid males on a public internet forum while maintaining their dignity and views of their world? But that doesn’t happen in this world. And that’s the double standard. You gals wouldn’t waste ten minutes of your exfoliation time, with horny dumb-asses who only want to bed you, when you’d rather use that time to paint your toes and sing while cooking.
So have some damned compassion and perspective for this Eagle who has not lead you-on in any way. I’m the guy who gracefully, has not crafted an intentional motive of… “give me-ya-number”, then pleading with you for a dinner-date, then followed by empty sex and an awkward-stranger morning goodbye. I have maintained a loyal platonic love of all. That’s it.
None of you since my entry on this site, except Gatubela and JoJo… have tolerated my virtuous drive and integrity, intended for my obvious needs for freedom of mind and spirit. This is a freedom I sustain every moment within me, sans all of you nit-picking me into a boiling glare.
Yes my willpower is contradicting as we have spoken. But I am no hypocrite. Make sure you understand that. My willful heart and soul has let-go, when I feel that my freedom is not under siege.
It’s very simple women of the world. I am free and I love all of you. So the idea of picking one damsel, committing my sexual being for the rest of my physical days to her, and protecting her from the unknown cruelties, deceptions and mysteries of herself… would mean I am not allowing her to see the expansion of her soul (eternity) to be free.
We are only free in this universe when we do not need any person to fulfill a perpetual identity void. Self-approval, self-respect–> is infinite. That’s the verb you have been bitter with. Well too bad.
Umm… I said I live in this world. Not ever does that mean I am OF this world.;)
You are loved. And compassion, perspective and understanding are there. That’s all you need to know.
Be well, Eagle
How can you say that you are free and you love all women? That is one heck of an abyss you are swimming in too.
I say that because actually, I am trying to imagine how it would be, IF I were to say that same statement to “all men” in the world while using the words “sexual being”.
hahahaha!
(youtube.com/watch?v=6a_RUHeELWM)
The eagle is more than an abyss – beyond. Why don´t you ever transmit this beauty in your words?
Death is not so bitter. Its life that sucks. I mean this from my perspective of having to deal with those males that you were talking about. And my daily slaughter activities, which I desperately feel trapped in.
And speding your physical days for the rest of your physical life , is not so eternal either.
Why the heck don´t you mention love?
“How can you say that you are free and you love all women? That is one heck of an abyss you are swimming in too.”
Death of the illusory personality. That’s how I am free. How did I get here you ask?… Well I’ve shared with you these occult secrets over the years. It seems like you still don’t grasp what freedom is or means within my being Gatubela. I’ll give you a clue. You, and all women I attract are attracted to???… No… not my personality. You are all attracted to the energy of MY FREEDOM.
In this freedom, I am able to share intimate love on a massive scale.
Compare for example people you’ve known through your life, like your parents, like your co-workers, like your neighbors. DO THEY have a capacity to OPENLY see and love humanity through the fears of other peoples prejudice?…through other peoples subjective biases? Just PAY ATTENTION to what and why others are perceiving between themselves, each other and you may glean an inkling of what I’m talking about.
My point is that these people through your life see the world subjectively. That subjectivity LIMITS their ability TO LOVE and see beyond the constructs of their self-defined personality (ego).
My psyche is tuned in with the psychic matrix of all humanity and the power of nature amid us. My nature is in tune with all creatures fears, foibles and virtue. And I sense a persons ‘place’ in the world very quickly. I sense motivations and attachments in other peoples psyche manifestations just by watching’feeling them (vision), without any discussion. I receive God (the evolution of consciousness) and instinctively feel the survival instinct in humans and what level of soul morality and courage these persons wield. So women in general are clueless of an old soul until fear transforms their stagnant, comforted, superficial perceptions of ‘their’ reality through relationships. Penetration does not happen to women on psycho-sexual-psychic levels in this mortally conscious world. People are blissful in their existential ignorance which is what I see and feel 99 percent of the time.
The personal heart/soul/sex-instinct energy within and through me is one with all life and one with death around and through me. Death of the personality The abyss is known to me because I am not reacting to the physical world as “a personality”. The depth of what I see and feel in human nature travels far beyond what person is saying and thinking. I see through them, or INTO their core. I see frailty, severe attachment to things, people and circumstance. I FEEL THEIR FEARS. How? … It’s my intense instinctual nature. Therefore I LOVE ALL women because I understand the perils and suffering veiled in their humanity. But I can’t protect everyone from themselves. That is true compassion and selflessness.
“..And spending your physical days for the rest of your physical life , is not so eternal either..”
My body is not eternal Gatubela. That’s why I had specified my “physical” body. As I’ve shared numerous times, our body is just a vessel. Our body vaporizes in an instant. Our body is mortal. Yet the evolving consciousness of God– through our minds-eye… is immortal.
“..Why the heck don´t you mention love?..”
That’s an unconscious personality question Gatubela. Love is not mentioned because you already know that I am a giver of it–> Love in all of it’s ambivalent forms.
Do I need to mention love when I know I attract it? When I know I AM IT?
Real love is Awake, Gatubela. It is engaging and beautifully present with another, I am not unconscious because my soul integrates with all of life and death in human nature. I feel fears in others that others deny in themselves all day and everyday. Again, psychic intuition and the capability to know heaven and hell through a persons existence.
It’s non-linear, non logical awareness, It used to be a frightening curse I was terrified to see and feel within myself.
Today, eternally… it is my blessing and purpose.
Accepting fearful feelings makes us stronger. Yet the truth is almost every person rejects fearful feelings ‘as a weakness’ or something to ignore. People always miss the deep meaning of themselves through their feelings.
Those fearful rejections among their squabbling in survival, is a rejection of Death. It is a rejection of profound inner-change. A fear of facing the truths and becoming stronger THROUGH ALL EXPERIENCE.
Most people who don’t understand the Warrior spirit, don’t see or love the energy of this universe with objectivity. People are taught the way life “is” from an early age in their family. Then schools, books, and career tells these same people what life means as adults. The script is perfectly laid out for them. Nothing is questioned. People accept their lot in life. That is not freedom.
So the meaning of people not facing their demons, means they are not psychologically equipped to deal with a TRUTH of that fear happening inside them. Again, nothing is questioned. People run from themselves each moment the fear arises.
The more I know in this universe, the braver I must be. Seeking the truth is ordained for souls who are innately courageous to fulfill their higher potential. Our higher potential is limitless, and is certainly not finite.
Again full circle from my previous post. The personality is finite. To truly transform ego, we must die first. Kill what we ‘think’ and open our hearts. Fears of unconscious thought energy entering ones ego domain are reactive and blocked out. Thus this is what we see when we observe “closed minded” people ranting about something pointless and non-present in the world. They are baby souls who will not accept any energy penetrating their conceived ego shell. That ego refuses to dance with death. Nor will it (the personality) dissolve into the cosmos of the One soul.
All personalities out there… perceive the feelings of fear as something “abnormal”. Hahahaha.
That folks… is the institutionalized brainwashing of our material obsessed culture. The culture of survival in all it’s hues of discussion and action.
Its bloody given that I face my fears….and that I face death. Can you speak to me as if you know that about me, instead as if you did not?
Intimate love is not massive – thats a contridiction. That´s alright – Scorpio would erase almost 75% of all the words in language, due to the fact that they are stagnant states and not existant to them. They would probably create 75% different states as well.
You know that I pay attention – and personality love is different, I know that.
And no, it was not your freedom that is attractive. Attractive is also a personality term as well, from my perspective.
Ok;)
yeh you are of this world mr pluto. you wee you poo you eat you crap and dont tell me you have never scratched your balls.you’re not better than everyone else.. you are just a bloke. an interesting bloke and you feel stuff and sense and are very sensual dont deny it,but you have an ego a mile high and you are judgemental.you judged me and you attacked me .. quite unfairly. and yes you were a hypocrite cos you did criticise me. and you flip and change and you’re not consistent.thats ok but then dont go garbling on as if you are untouchable and without flaws, thats what i mean by humility.or lack of.i just cant take you seriously if you cant get really honest about yourself. what you wrote about your views on money was interesting to me. it really was. i think about the same stuff.and i love how you explore what you feel. you know that.dont you? That dinner convo we had i was mucking around.. you know it.. and it was teasing you a bit too.. that was all.for my sense of freedom just like yours. for you to then jump to some crazy conclusions about lifelong whatever wasnt the truth.all just fear based bullshit. you say “we are only free in this world when we do not need any person to fulfil a perpetual identity void” . i am guessing you were talking about you? or the ideal of what you would like to be/become? yet when i didnt give you what you wanted/expected then you attacked me. so that blows that theory out the window. all the “we” “we” “we” stuff. say “I’ instead. its more personal.can you do that please.
just read my stars and it said something about holding my tongue today.. oops too late !
It’s bristles, Gatubela. Theoretical love. I did try to imagine that same thing. For instance, I LIKE all men as species. But I can only LOVE one on a personal level.
To truly love one has to leave the abyss at some stage. But what if one IS the Darkness? A state of being which one IS and cannot truly escape? There is no state beyond the abyss, other than a union with oneself?
So the choice is then—-> personal freedom over love. Not both. To me it feels like a choice which one was forced to make, for many various reasons.. I don’t feel it is a given, but you accept it or not. The being of the person as is. And that’s why it is a lot to deal with for one single woman. I mean… if she is fully aware that the love one feels for her is… so eternal that she can leave at any time, and so can the man… takes a lot of guts to enter this kind of union. No guarantees, other than every moment rolling on to the next one, and the next one may be not there at all. The Darkness speaks. Always.
Life sucks, hahaha!!! You are so right when we have to soldier on in the reality of making a living. And my material requirements are minimal, phew! Still a struggle.
What do you mean by “And speding your physical days for the rest of your physical life”?
Maybe, it’s not physical at all in this case? And not sexual?
Do you want to know how the ‘unequal’ treatment would manifest itself here, without love that you project, the one I was talking about? If I were to ask those, two things would take place: 1) Ignore or 2) slash my wrists But you will be OK I am sure LOL
I haven’t ‘earned’ my big gold stars. And the heck with those:)
Cheers
You misunderstood me Ines. I do understand it. I just saw beyond the post.
I just felt that a man should feel joy in his sexuality. A person´s sexuality, once touched by the divine, is not ownership of someone´s soul, so why are you confusing one thing with the other?
The divine seeks the best expression of a person´s soul, always. That means, bitch claws OFF.
There is no beauty in trying to possess someone. There is beauty in both souls surrendering to their divinity. If divinity were something that did not have to be fought for and if being honest and descent were not the current reasons for people attacking you and attempting to control the situation, I guess darkness would not perceived as you see it. Unfortunately, the pure, the honest and the soulful, are actually brutally attacked with attempts to dominate this energy and rationalization is one of the best dominating and abusive things a person can do to another.
You jump off your own ego, because you realize that you can not LOVE truly anymore, The here one day and gone the next is actually the most strongest indication of surrender, as you learn to navegate in the abyss. Meaning, light transforms into “heaven” if you enter the darkness “in the state of true light”. You call the best in the universe to you, as per your own level or capacity. And that is beyond.
A person´s capacity to love, is what they see in the dark.
Ah no, Gatubela, there is no confusion on my part, but you kinda went on to a different angle now.. I just feel that I cannot stand in front of all men of the world and and say ‘I love you all’, without saying the same to all women of the world.
I posted that and regretted it because I now feel it is none of my business to nose in another’s stuff. I don’t feel that I want to, strange….
To enter the Darkness in the state of light is the most bloody process there is. Darkness is immensely strong, pulls one back, the easiest and the least painful (in the short term) way out of the abyss, tempting huh… I had to fight those demons left, right and centre, to come out on the other side with love. And do you think it doesn’t get tested? It bloody does, it’s like catching self in some shameful act and DRAGGING myself out of it every time… and what’s left? I can only describe it as something in my heart so painfully sweet, PAINFULLY. Want of nothing and a painful sweetness.. Sexuality doesn’t come into it. But no, Gatubela, it doesn’t become heaven. Not for me. All that happened – I lost my shackles. So if freedom is heaven.. I feel that I may never enter the chained state again. And what else is left? The ‘forever’, because once Love entered in that way – it stays, independent of ANYTHING. I now understand WHY Scorpio love those who long departed their lives. Part of it never dies. Because it was from the soul centre.
I am actually exploring the origins of existential fears, namely, fear of physical death. I came to the conclusion death does not exist. We can never experience it. Yep. I will write a treatise (hahaha) on my blog.
There are things we always know but fail to express coherently. Thanks, Mercury in Pisces too.
Well…mercury in pisces will understand when what was separate starts to collapse and illusions will shatter to Unity.
The comment was to P.Puppy and not to you.
But for the people who enter their own darkness (and accept the cosmic sea of death invite from Pluto)…well, there is no surprise as to how you entered and why heaven is not visible to you.
youtube.com/watch?v=-HMazPXE9EE
Umm….
Music? Soundcloud?
yeh.. soundcloud is cool. so is jango.. both free still i think? great way to hear about new music.. and even bands that i have never heard of from the 80’s , 90’s.they have their own station so you can type in a band you like and they will play heaps of other music from that specific genre.one of the perks of internet.
Umm, I mentioned Soundcloud because it’s possible to upload stuff there and share with others, it’s very easy to use. I have done one song, not shared with anyone though… Once I record Little Stream – I will upload it too, I have a cold right now.. You can too with yours.
I am off.
hmm dont think i am ready to share it with the whole world yet.maybe one day.take care of your cold.
I can actually relate to a dilemma of a strong charismatic male who constantly encounters women desperate to lay claim to his divine goodies LOL How? Through my mum. In the same way women want such a man – most men out there want a sexually attractive (first) intelligent (to their level LOL) female. My mum used to be a real stunner, and even now. A fifties Holywood style, classical beauty with a crop of blond hair and grey eyes. She got divorced early and ever since I can remember – she was under siege from men. There was ALWAYS someone chasing her, and sometimes they would knock on our door uninvited, she would hide from guys. She worked in a male environment, and guys would pop into her lab just to gaze at her, sent her love poems, flowers, run after her in the street… we’d think this is awesome, but she found it very tiring and could never understand that desperation. She,too, was naive when it came to gender dynamics, I guess like most of us. Did this high level of desirability bring her personal happiness? No. She never found her match. She is a Gemini with a Pisces Moon. I guess that’s why we have always been friends, my mum and me, and she gave me lots of freedom.
I had a flash of inspiration which I found fascinating… I now perceive everything written from two perspectives. The first one is ‘the old’ me, my immediate emotional response, amygdala jumps in and colours my perception with feeling. The second one takes another look, and Bingo! the picture changes. Imagine, for instance, that you went to a completely different blog and started reading a comment. You know absolutely nothing about the previous history of how it came about… so you read it with an open mind, without any preconceived ideas and expectations, as a detached observer. That’s ‘the new’ me. And that is how we should really process every bit of feeling and thought coming our way – what unravels at that moment in time when you communicate, without richly layering it with what we already know. Haha! This new way cuts out much of so called ‘misunderstandings’… no, we were not misunderstood, we were EXPECTING some form of inner confirmation to what is already in us, one way or another – from another person. It is not what is being said to us, but our state in which we are ready to PERCEIVE IT. Ah crap, don’t know how to explain it.
How easy it is to see with clarity when one crossed the barrier of perceptive limitation… there is compassion and love in silence, until we are ready to RECEIVE openly.
“you are just a bloke. an interesting bloke ”
No, he is MUCH MORE than that. The state of completeness within oneself is SACRED and requires immense STRENGTH and understanding of own
inner realities.. and to arrive at that is not an easy path.. I observe just how far I walked away from the ‘normal’ way of thinking and relating out there. Someone left a comment on my blog, and on the surface it LOOKED like the person knew what they were talking about. My reply threw them off, it never even OCCURED to them to view things in that light.. PEOPLE HAVEN’T GOT A CLUE. and I understood that people use convenient phrases of wisdom, a cheap currency WITHOUT real comprehension. They exchange this currency to elicit ‘mutual understanding’, they thank one another for smilies and sweet comments, an endless chain of self gratification thinly veiled as an interest in what another has to say, a dialogue which leads nowhere and teaches NOTHING. I laugh at it and I want nothing to do with this ‘communication’, something switched on in my head and oh, Eagle, you were so right having said it will become harder.. and SO MUCH MORE MEANINGFUL, it makes me shudder that I spent a good part of my life in that comatose state, the one I observe in others now. Thank you for the depth. I was NEVER given a chance to EXPLORE my
inner world and the true reality of the outer existence, something I had a longing for and there was NO ONE in my life interested to go there with me or point me in the right direction. And I didn’t know how to go about it alone, given my background, the world in which yoga was distributed as bad underground copies. The word ‘divinity’, Christ, I am not even sure I know it in Russian, can you believe that…. My first boyfriend was all about art and self expression and intellect. My ex was all about business and money. None of it called out to me. Here I got a chance AT LAST to go DEEP, and yes, was not pretty, but it was what I desperately needed and wanted. There was one common denominator in my profound dissatisfaction with life – me. I need to explore and learn further and higher, with an open heart and mind.
Eagle, remember I said you could not set me free, I could only do this myself? I want you to know that your Plutonic power of affect goes far beyond these lines on the screen. This amazing combination of Scorpio/Piscean energy… my son has a bucket chart, exactly the opposite
of yours on the wheel, Pluto in the First and Leo Mars handle.. He reminds me of you in the way he perceives the world around him, instinctively. He thinks I am an exceptional mum, but I think he is an exceptional human being, brilliant mathematical and physics abilities, reasoning, perception and HEART, wanting to CONTRIBUTE to the world, not take from it. At seventeen he supassed many forty year olds by now. Last year before uni, exams etc, and he still volunteers for a dementia old folks home here, drags himself for an hour walk every Saturday. His discipline is iron. And hear this… HE GOT IT. A year of us debating, him rolling his eyes, saying
to me ‘Your astrological pseudoscience and spirituality’, reading me passages from the Bible and quoting famous philosophers whose books he
reads (he is self teaching philosophy for an exam)… he finally GOT it. He will debate anything until he gets ‘it’ or ‘you’ (reminds me of someone LOL). And one evening… something turned inside of him, you should have seen his face, it was so… enlightened, that’s the only way to put it, light emanated from it. And the first thing he said to me was ‘If I ever have children, this will become part of us’. And I know he will always search for answers and will find them further afield. But that first understanding has come through me – from you. It opened his mind to things beyond science.
So… THANK YOU, Dark Angel. I take my hat off to you for breaking through the limitations of that turbulent energy boiling inside of you – taking that Darkness towards the light, I know its affects only too well, being punched by something similar most of my life, unable to handle it. No, the energy is always there, but your mastery over its effects is beyond what any average man can achieve. That’s the Warrior. I UNDERSTOOD because I felt it with every fibre of my body. And I’ve made peace with all. I’ll love you forever. And may you live forever.
Yesterday I went into a true state of solitude. How… my son is away for a few days. I realised that I haven’t actually BEEN alone for many many years. And there I was, completely on my own, with my thoughts and feelings.. what happened was at first that great cloud of sadness as I felt HOW it is to be without another soul around. It was scary and unsettling at first. The thoughts fuelling the fear of ‘Is that how it is going to be when he is gone?’ And on top of that ‘If anything ever happened to him, I will not be able to cope’…oh those
mental projections of the worst case scenarios… And I settled into that fear, I really did, and let it BE and TALK to me. And then a strange thing happened. Again that sense of eternity and connection to what’s beyond this physical sadness, everything got suspended, it was very late, the world asleep, and I felt —> BEYOND that sadness, beyond the fear of ending my days riddled by the guilt of an unfullfilled life, the life that promissed so much laughter and love and didn’t deliver. There WAS love in that moment, and the fear edged
sideways, and I felt alone no more. I can honestly say it was the first time when fear transformed into light within me, I felt I CAN be free from it. And yes, it’s only ONE of many that riddle people’s lives, but it SHIFTED. I did NOT feed it, don’t know why.. I was facing – me, and it was alright. It was alright to be with self and feel that state of embrace, the state of acceptance of what was at that moment in time. IT WAS REAL, as real as running fingers over one’s palm, as if I PHYSICALLY touched my inside – with my mind, fuck, how does one describe it..impossible. I HUGGED THE FEAR OF ALONENESS. And it gave me back- ease. It was beautiful in its complex simplicity. Whenever this happens again (and it will, without a doubt), I know there is love in it. How strange…
and Eagle.. I don’t know HOW you sense it, but I was looking at your face last night yes, on my mobile, I got a new one, the old one packed up, and no, no abyss riddled longings. I was looking straight into your eyes and asking ‘How do you do it’… it’s the God honest truth, on the name of my son.. I asked how you deal with that state. I got my answer. And fuck, how you pick up on that – I have no idea, but it always seems to run in parallel.
This is how it felt
(youtube.com/watch?v=0v44TuQ9T4k)
Intimate love in that sense is a sense of intimate knowledge and understanding of another, even if that other hasn’t got a clue about
themselves. What can get closer to another person than seeing all their unexpressed fears and facing all their projections of those… after all, people don’t walk around and shout about those to everyone, no, they hide them, or even are not aware of their existence. And what can get closer to love than loving another THROUGH that blind state they are in? ‘Forgive them for they know not what they do’. It is not ‘intimate’ in how it is understood in the world. In this – all are loved. But certainly, at that level of personal evolution to love a
blind creature in a one to one setup is void of fullfillment and joy.
The question is then—–> HOW this state of love can also manifest in one on one relationships. Attachments do and will form, but will we allow them to CONTROL our choices and feelings, in that loss of inner autonomy? This is NOT a straight forward easiness of detachment, it doesn’t occur naturally. One has to mindfully observe those tendencies within themselves and willfully – distance from those, not from the person we love – from our instinctive drive to envelope outselves in them to the point of losing our inner sense of independence. And it will not be pain free, not in the beginning of the journey at least.
I don’t want to possess anyone. If I cannot provide the conditions for the person to be their best selves when we are together – I failed to love. I love my son in that way, and maybe I didn’t always cook dinner on time or bought him the latest gadgets – but he is free. So I know that love exists.
SPIRITS DO TRAVEL
Listen to me… no and no,
It was not a long time ago,
And it will not be a long time ahead,
Because what once was – will never end.
**
Do you believe in the possibility
That spirits travel together in humility
Of never been, yet ever being,
Guided by divinity of instinct and feeling?
**
The chances were of one in a million
To walk into this sacred dominion.
Had I not truly entered your space
Would I have recognised this place
**
As belonging only to you?
Have no fear and start anew.
And I will bow with grace,
In awe of this spirit of faith.
It’s easy to go when love was misplaced, although love is never misplaced really, only blind… when we bestow our devotion on some dumb ass, and let’s face it, it happens every day out there. And I wish it was about a dumb ass here… and it’s not. No matter what else takes place in my life, this will never be matched. Every drop of blood that runs in me – knows that. And I didn’t want ‘the forever’ in this way, but it cannot leave now, this. I accept. Because no, it is not about the energy of freedom or personality. It’s about the beauty of the soul. When every thought and feeling shared – found its rightful place within mine in such an instinctual way, as if it lived there always. And I understood the tears, the fears, the pain of someone’s life, the love that never died, the highs and the lows… And the love of God, as it dwells here – is above everything else. It is what sustains and nurtures this soul, it is what gives it light. Who are we to want anything different with him? To love him is to love the Universe, I said it way back, when that first time the feeling hit me, but did I know what it was then? No. Just an instinct. And here we are. Wanting nothing is to want beyond EVERYTHING as is normally known. It is to want everything, but not how it is out there.
And so I am saying that it doesn’t matter if we are alone or share our life with another. What matters is HOW we are doing it. And those two are no different, when channelled through love. That feeling of eternity keeps visiting me every day, there really is no way to describe it except to say it feels similar to when one tried to imagine the infinity of the Cosmos. But different too. I can will it to be when I need the ‘pick up’. And then… all falls away. Solace in that. I guess it might be that stillness. In that state I feel connected to everything out there and not alone. It feels SO VERY OLD… in that state everything else becomes so INSIGNIFICANT, compared to the feeling of this eternity. How it is possible – I don’t know, and I have no idea what it is that I am touching. Not yet anyway.. so much to know.
No, Mercury in Pisces has a hundred high definition channels running on simaltaneously, the perceptions of feeling in and around me, those occuring between others… in a group… atmospheres, not only happening now, but those that will happen in the near future.. they are not words, they are IMPRESSIONS, like psychic invisible apparitions, and placing those in an excessible form is hard. I am not going to anymore. All rambling, who can understand those really.
i have hit rock bottom. immense grief. no words will describe what i feel.
Umm…
Try to FIND the words. To talk through the grief you are feeling right now, to describe what you feel.. words don’t come easy to you I know, but you need to give shape and form to what’s inside of you now, even if it seems like total nonsence. Even in that tangible world out there, with all the bad therapists who don’t have a clue about the origins of human misery – words are the first thing people use to BEGIN to listen TO THEIR OWN STORY. The fear of opening up, of shaping your inner state into something that can be explored further – will hold you back from growing and learning. Look.. what changed since the man you loved departed from your life? Have you REALLY changed and learned from it ON A VERY DEEP PSYCHOLOGICAL LEVEL? Because here you are, going through that same thing again… Don’t close off and go into the cave of misery WITHOUT trying to understand it with love – of yourself and another. You can objectively view it if you step away and see what is happening as reading someone’s story.
You know… Mercury is about communication, true, but it’s only a by product of —–> PERCEPTION, on all levels. Gemini – mental
perception. My Picean Mercury – perception of feeling. Yours – perception of tangible realities. And feelings ARE tangible, they need a VOICE, and acknowledgement and an understanding if we are to move away from plunging self into despair when the feeling hits.
Talk, baby. There is no shame in feeling and sharing.
Hi Umm
Did you find a way to heal? How´s the passion?
(youtube.com/watch?v=2rALVgdoMHk)
That’s not the beginning of the end
That’s the return to yourself
The return to innocence.
Love
Devotion
Feeling
Emotion
Love
Devotion
Feeling
Emotion
Don’t be afraid to be weak
Don’t be too proud to be strong
Just look into your heart my friend
That will be the return to yourself
The return to innocence.
If you want, then start to laugh
If you must, then start to cry
Be yourself don’t hide
Just believe in destiny.
Don’t care what people say
Just follow your own way
Don’t give up and use the chance
To return to innocence.
That’s not the beginning of the end
That’s the return to yourself
The return to innocence.
Don’t care what people say
Follow just your own way
Follow just your own way
Don’t give up, don’t give up
To return, to return to innocence.
If you want then laugh
If you must then cry
Be yourself don’t hide
“…And then… all falls away. Solace in that. I guess it might be that stillness. In that state I feel connected to everything out there and not alone. It feels SO VERY OLD… in that state everything else becomes so INSIGNIFICANT, compared to the feeling of this eternity…”
Yep for sure.
In that eternal stillness we indeed are not alone. It’s an exalted state of?.. BEING. Time travel and quantum space feels ethereal through visions in that exalted state.
In There…we are not thinking. We not are not doing. We are not planning. We are not critically attached to our inner-noise of outer world lunacy and dysfunction all around us. We are One with sensitivity of our breathing and emotion. Intellect, as we think of it, is subordinated in that exaltation. We are not fearing an illusory, conformed mental barrier conceived by the outer physical chatter of the human world and it’s circumstance.
In that exaltation, we ‘respond’ to our inner promptings, our intuition sensing a vast power, infinitely greater than trivial issues and circumstance. In that state, we are accepting of constant fears speaking to us within our being as a impermanent energy source to be revered and studied. (With objectivity)
An intimate relationship with the feeling of fear, is really the true initiation into another world… especially through strong Water/Fire nature people. Understanding the power of fear can be a divine asset for ones spiritual growth. It helps us understand ‘the why’ beneath the choices we made/make in our lives. So here is the link with suffering, which has to be examined constantly through ones life by determining the critical causes of “why” all unconscious choices were made in ones life. Fear is a superb teacher of that, if we are able and courageous enough to face it each moment.
We can definitely learn from our past (not cynically and sentimentally live in the past)… by connecting the personal meanings of our subconscious fear driven choices up until the now… in our present. So the one other dimension of this simplistic model of inner development…is that in order to truly transcend our past conditionings from inner-to-outer subconscious choices–> we have to know how to visualize, so we creatively visualize a future we can realistically build (in us) through a synthesized consciousness that constantly teaches us meaning in our mundane present.
It’s phenomenal how when we are functioning strictly from the subconscious personality level… a person perceives their outer world and goes through the motions in a sensual-seeking, physical, security focused realm. I understand this realm intimately and the realm I see now. Because I was THERE.. in that subconscious dream for 32 years of my life.
Thanks for the little song. It was very sweet.;)
Thank you.
You understood. Not many do, leave alone give it a verbal form.
It is a place of meeting the self, unsettling at first, yes, I entered from fear. My son’s absence helped, as he is one love in my life. And this is where love REALLY happened, taken across all that I saw: my life, my end and my entry into something after. I don’t know what it will be, but there was no fear of death or fear of aloneness. And there was no time, just… feeling SURE. It is not bliss, spontaneous bliss states, as I know now can be extremely meaningless, although very joyous. I cannot maintain this 24/7, nor do I want to, because it will mean stopping to live, at least in my reality as is now. But I can summon it when the doubts and fears creep in, to seek answers.
I too enjoy the hedonistic pleasures this life has to offer, my sensual Taurus Moon makes sure of that. But it was never ENOUGH for me, I just didn’t attach meaning to that.. A life in limbo it was. the unity of mind and matter, did I even think in those terms?. Simple and infinitely complex.
Visualise… strange that you say that, you always hit the same spot I am exploring. You see.. difficult for me, this one, not like for you lefty. Visualisation is the right hemisphere, and I am much in the left, word based interaction, even if I struggle to describe my perceptions vividly. Yet… when I try to bin something from a distance – I always have seconds flashing before me of how it ends up there. It does, and that’s why I was good at landing baskets in basketball. Perhaps, if one stops visualising binning things and grabs one’s entire life to propell it somewhere… yes. I didn’t connect the dots in the past – mundane present as manifestation of creative living. Hard, isn’t it..
You are loved, no matter what happens in this life. This is all you want really – to know the love is there. It is, always. Please take care of yourself. You are important to many people.
I wrote this a month ago.
FORGIVE AND ACCEPT
Forgive and accept, years more to come
Of love and life, laughter and sorrow.
So what if you landed on your bum,
Get up and back on your path to follow.
**
Give yourself a gentle kick in the posterior.
Soulful expression needs a soulful action plan.
Scrub, as you go along, your muddy interior
And remind yourself you aren’t the only one.
**
And when you face an occasional stumble,
Which will happen in this world of surprises –
Look back on these days, grateful and humble
To all the angels in their nutty disguises.
The Full Moon was glorious last night.
The clouds running in its face, the ghoustly light.
I wondered if it could be seen like that everywhere.
Sending shivers to us from there to here.
It really was ghoustly and mersmerising here in England. The light was unusually bright.
When I was looking at the Moon last night, I thought how many people are looking at it now and wondering about its mysteries.. Do they? And I remembered a character from Master and Margarita… a man who, against his will, was summoned to the Satan’s ball, and at the end of it he asked to go back, even asked for a ‘paper’ to confirm his absence, haha. And he was returned back home, and for the rest of his life, during a Full Moon he would come out, sit outside and grief, saying things like ‘Ah, fool… why did I not stay… asked for the paper… Goddess… it could have been different.. what a fool I have been’ A life lost, an opportunity – rejected, and all the regret that haunted him forever..
And I thought about a Piscean man I spoke to at college, and how passionately defensive he was towards something I said in the group. Five
weeks passed, and he still couldn’t let it go, it made him angry. How lost and closed off he felt for me, and I saw myself in him, and it was painful to remember.
And I thought it is going to take me another two years to arrive at where I want to be, and I don’t know how I will survive that, because how this world operates on a material level – is still a mystery to me.
And I thought that I will be alone in this physical life, it has been spoken for. I never want to go through the silly dating scene again and meet these guys and know without a shadow of a doubt that I will never love them on a personal level. And that I don’t want to listen to my friend who feels I should ‘go out there and have fun’… what fun it is in going to some bar to talk stupid, CV like stuff with men with dead eyes… I’d rather go ice skating or walk the beach – on my own. I felt again with certainty that my path has been determined, no matter how difficult or strange it will be.
Tests and trials…
The full moon was clear and sad.
That is how it looked like here.
Sometimes the moon talks if you concentrate on it.
I looked at it around 10:00 p.m. here.
Yes, rejection feels terrible. Even a bit worse, when you are giving soulfully…lol…from both evolved polarities.
hahaha! I guess not many will understand that one.
No…the path is determined as you manifest in the light. When you work through the evolved darkness, the impossible is possible.
But this requires one to be able to FEEL detached and blindness, as you can not attach to any manifested result, as you spiral higher and higher to more evolved forms of energy….or where ever it takes you.
I was wondering if you are an envious or jealous person, who feels these dark emotions, unexpectedly?
That Moon connected me to something, and I have not been at peace since, don’t know what it is, just a feeling.
Envy and jealousy are connected, aren’t they. No, neither are part of my psyche, thanks God. I am not saying I never felt it, but it’s very rare and usually a few seconds, and gone. I am too engrossed in my head to feel envy for other people LOL I am simply not a posessive person by nature, Aquarian Venus?. Live and let live.
If you knew the history of my relationships and marriage – that would become soooo-ooo clear… A couple of days ago I told my ex about the moment I decided to leave him. He remarried a year later, a classic marriage of convenience, he was afraid of being alone, she wanted to live here, sad really. I know part of him still loves me, by the way he treats me now, and he absolutely reveres our son.
BUT having said that… HERE, in this place I have experienced the feeling of jealousy, and it was torturous, lasted for a couple of weeks, which is PLENTY for me. Came from feeling at the bottom of the barrel, so insecure that it threw me into that state, the feeling of being a nobody, because someone thought I was a nobody, haha.. It took an effort to gain my sense of self worth, and when I felt secure and truly in love, the jealousy let go. It didn’t matter anymore.
I did a free astro reading, after I wrote the above, and here:
“For starters, while most of the other main StarTypes really need to interact and relate to one another on an almost constant basis, here we have a StarType that is in no way quite that needy. Ness has the role of “the Manager” and the “Managed” locked up in one birth chart. She may not require all that much in the way of outside co-worker relationship at all. This StarType is self-sufficient to a marked degree and thus has rightly earned the nickname of “Independent.”
We could say that Ness is capable of not needing others as much as the rest of us, and that is so true. She is really self-sufficient and often somewhat independent of relationships in general from time to time. This is not to say she does not have or enjoy relationships, for she most certainly does. However, she is not as dependent on relations as, let’s say, most of the rest of us. She can take relations and she can also be quite content just being out on her own.”
And that is actually very true when I look at the patterns of my relationships. I don’t seek others out, and to do so and be knocked off my independence platform it would have been something truly exceptional.
You know… yourself and others here mentioned that they want to feel, huh… for me it’s the opposite, especially now. I’ve been feeling intensely my whole life, since very young.
Soulful independance is alot different from physical independance. Relationships with people, are actually blind cold realities, based on “I really don´t give a real damn about you.” socially accepted interaction.
So, externally established goals and needs give the notes for this melody. Actually, this is an Aquarian paradise. LoL…
I once told an Aquarian Manager who was describing his strategy to me, that it was the things that he did not see, that would be the lie he was living with and the discontent of his employees. There is no well deserved “pat on the back” when at every level, the face to face interaction is the chaotic butterfly effect on his goals. This not not something he understood, although he did want “the statistical tools” to detect them.
Soulful independance can not be offered to anyone, if the reality of relationships and their cold lessons are not learned. It is the willingness to feel these harsh emotions. Rejection is not an absolute – actually, it does not exist. What occurs is the knowledge of self, and the damage that can be inflicted IF love is not given as the “bridge” to cross from our polar extremes.
Also, independance is not just related to relationships, but also becoming FREE from the game. I would much rather prefer to learn how to feel this harmony with nature, and kill a rabbit for my lunch, than continue to dedicate my time to growing old, loosing dignity and being placed in an old folks home when nearing my death.
Meaning, that soulful independance gives you the willingness to do what it takes to maintain your connection to the cosmos. Its a jump too – turning away from what you have always known, or progressing from Aquarious to Pisces.
For the psychologist in you, in a blunt sense, everyone will find it easy to be “independant” through Maslow´s hierarchy of needs, as it means that we will be “dependant” on our institutions and minimal necessities. Its all bla bla bla, as we will fear death through the lower physiological needs, and higher needs, will be thrown out the window. The reality is that perhaps we need the independance on the lower ranks, FIRST and then proceed higher?
Aquarious is also a social battle. And through that, they can express love as well. On a soulful level, it is the soulful battle, and acquiring “the knowledge” to be connected to the cosmos, through detachment and pisces energy.
It is truly a unique position to see that individuality is not “independance”.
Yes, I do want to feel – soulfully. I go into myself and I feel absolute destruction and hell – and then, like a blessing the darkness turns into healing energy, provided that I have done the soul work and “put my money where my heart is.”
Don’t you feel that inability to kill that rabit is a common Achilles heel, and so people ACCEPT, through work type relationships, what is, a vicious circle that robs us of that ‘independence on the lower ranks’ as you said – even further? You meet your manager. Or some red tape rule which says this cannot be done. Adopted through the Houses of Parliament and made into the law. Or people who always want to get to that rabbit you killed – first, and then consume it ALONE. That’s the reality. And the soulful independence is beaten underground for the majority, and we do not always speak the truth, like we did when very young. On that mundane level – I did a few times. And lost. And so did you feel ‘rejected’ by that manager? No. What happens then is an understanding that people be as they are, on their level of evolution, we let them be and plough on with our truth, no matter the outcome. Imagine Jesus feeling ‘rejected’ by the crowds of Jerusalem, huh… It is a hard path, and you may very well be dead at the end of it. Actually, the body will be regardless LOL
Maslow (Maslow means ‘of butter’ in Russian, btw) didn’t imply at all that our immediate needs automatically bind us to serve the Gods of the greedy and the heartless.It was a simple statement of our survival priorities as dictated by life. Then of course some smart ass makes it into a fancy looking pyramid and attaches THEIR interpretations to what was, to gain the PhD letters after their name, and what did THEY contribute to anything?If we are physically dead from lack of food, water and warmth – what good is our love to anyone? UNLESS I have given you my last drop of water when we are both dying in the desert… and if you ever felt excruciating physical pain for hours and days – you will know just how much that takes priority over everything. It has to, because the body is the carrier, the support structure of the mind.. Self actualisation is very close to Jung’s individuation, the sense of becoming your highest, best self. The question is – where does the desire to better ourselves MEET OUR HEART, so that our better selves become contributors, and not takers in this world? I am not a psychologist. Cold logical theories about what makes us human – never spoke to me. That’s why Carl Jung and his wandering through the labyrinth of own psychosis and being brave enought to GAIN understanding from that – is endlessly fascinating for me. That’s bravery, to me. I forgot that I had a heart. THAT was where the meaningless existence came from.
No, individuality is not independence. Soulful independence is manifestation of ethics and principles, both in inner and outer existence. I am an individual who finds it easy to have an autonomous inner life, without the need to cling to and dominate another. But I am not independent as far as this material world goes. For me the soulful work is not just feeling those hash truths of relating to others, if I cannot find a way to materialise these through my everyday life – I am a liar. THAT is the crust of my internal agony at the moment.
So here is what I feel, Gatubela… while being here and exploring the caves of the Underworld, I’ve lost ignorance, but, as a side effect, also my inner OPTIMISM. A small voice of hope… which always told me that no matter the circumstance – I have the tools to overcome. And now this voice has been quiet for months, instead listening to the Black Tales of the truths of this world. And I want it back. I have asked who I am. I am asking now why I am here in this world. And you know… enough of that. One good deed a day for myself, and one – for another. It will be hard and scary I know, but I want my heart back. As far as I am concerned – I am only one year old now.
I cannot express as beautifully as you do. But I hear you.
People don’t change. They make up better lies. Pay attention to who people actually are as witnessed through your life, including yourself. Liars need an excellent memory of what they are saying and scheming over others each day, because if they happen lie to people like me for example… they’ll feel the full force of their impotence in this world.
The titles given in our society like manager, supervisor, director, owner, CEO, DR… are all labels created by man (not God) FOR A ROLE he/she must play in the material world to survive and serve. Those labels or duty, DO NOT determine ones personal power in the world. That’s the huge joke. A director who may own a successful company does not mean that person is a wealthy mind, with the spirit of a gladiator, and to a visionary of truth-seeker in business. Your manager or boss does not mean they are the embodiment of personal power and courage. Those labels or rank manifest NOTHING about the strength of character and vision and leadership ability transmitted through that human being.
People should not use the word “Individuality” freely. The truth of real individuality out there– IS A FIGHTER IN LIFE. Not a security seeker. Big distinction. True individuals despise cowardice and self-justified rules created by man’s ignorance and greed. Because true authenticity, uniqueness and evolving identity is eternally soul progressive through the collective… through the BEING of transformation and the unknowns of the future. Soul power is innate energy which laughs at the pretenses of ego-leveraged dominance seen everywhere through the corporate and familial words.
True Individuality, is not about wearing the latest Nike’s or being popular.
TRUE pioneering individuals paint themselves into a corner socially, such as myself. We are pariahs in this ego-world… because within the structures and occupational laws of Saturn (man-made) and it’s self-appointed authority figures governing the fate of the masses, truly unique people are constantly re-shaping the oppression of man in his agenda-glorified, status-quo “rules”.
Creative, uncompromising pariahs are constantly defending their rights to be utterly true to themselves while existing among a institutionalized culture hell-bent on stripping us down into their own “yes sir” …”three bags full sir” guinea pig. The reality is out there…rules, money and rank always feel they are superior to brave, creative, competitive minds and hearts. Groups at the top take joy in dominating the fate of the helpers below. Don’t believe me? Pay attention. Everywhere you look. Just look, feel and experience the truth.
Most company directors, especially in small business, are foolishly trapped in their own heads, they are cowards, and true hypocrites…they are devious and scheming for their own financial gains… embodying nothing inspirational through their inept expression and deeds with those who help them.
In fact… fear again is the deep reason. People in positions of authority create their own rule books which supports their feeble, weak self-interests through the work they have organized. I’ve seen and experienced the most ignorant incompetent managers and owners thinking they are high level people with their educational ‘labels’ and experience. Small business owners run small businesses for a reason. They think small. Because they are small. A true individual who threatens that security, is always discarded. I’m one example.
True Individuality will never comprise the power and development of their soul for the game of superficial work politics, greed and injustices of so called ‘rules’.
This cannot be said when we observe masses of sheep all too happy and all too willing to comprise their lack-of-self for the life payoff of security.
“People don’t change. They make up better lies.”
This is cynical. Meaning – lack of faith, a form of concealed negativity at large..
Someone in the bloggorsphere said (not to me) “If I have just characterized the actual you unfairly, that means your comment is more powerful than you are – more of a habit than an expression of you.” True, a habitual fall into the pit of ‘normative’ relating, meaning… hide the Self behind an apparent general mistrust. People are not born cynics. They turn into those…
I was that cynic, and occasionally still fall. But (evolved) people always correct if that’s the case, as do I for others. It works. And there is self correction taking place inside, as in being mindful of the pit.
Cynicism (negative mistrust) and constructive criticism (negative/positive points) are not the same. Applied to the above… I would say ‘Most people find it hard to change from within, in preference to the comforts of the familiar (a negative). But some do change, whether bestowed upon them or seeking to (a positive).’ Dark and Light in everything…. as One.
I trust my expression of ‘People do change’, because you are an example. Or else it means I have no faith. That does not mean ‘no discernment’. That’s how I will tell who is changing (my faith in the possibility) and who is faking (my discernment to see if the possibility occurred).
Case closed.
Examples are everywhere.
Richard Nixon was the President of the United States. Does his rank and title MEAN he was a man of personal power?
No.
He was an abuser of the power. A coward. A manipulative greed monger.
Another example is Hitler and his “title”. Adolph Hitler had the power of the people through impression and mind manipulation, but he abused that power for ego-illusion. Why did he run and try and kill himself when Death dawned upon him?
Again… because he was a coward too, and a fool.
Personal power is not what we have (things, money). Personal power is not what we do (titles, status).
Power is who and what we are beneath those dressings. Power is our cause. It is our deepest motivation and conviction in life for equality and personal freedom.
Look, it goes without saying that we understand what true individuality means. For me… when I spoke about my rebelliousness earlier – it is part of my individuality, the square peg syndrome. The rebellion doesn’t work against the meaningless rules, protocols and structures.. From my personal experience and those few brave individuals I know (my Sagittarian ex boss is one) it results in the expulsion, or, at best and if we are lucky with the type of leader above us – tolerance to our ways. But it doesn’t change anything in the workplace, it doesn’t give it heart and meaning. What does a true individual do in that struggle to survive? There must be another way. Have you found it?
I have an innate suspicion of hyerarchy and groups. Both formed for the sole purpose of profit making and those for maintaining the status quo, i.e. governmental and other ‘social’ establishments. In fact, ALL groups are corruptable, no matter the original purpose of their establishement, because PEOPLE are corruptable. Here it comes down to true individuality… I had this conversation with my son actually a few days ago. He tried to find an example which didn’t fail through corruption. He found the Maltese Knights Order… well guess what… they failed too in the past, through lack of finance due to loss of lands. And now are a playground of ‘noble’ intent for the rich. In this world principles do not pay our way. I find it such a struggle, and there are MILLIONS of unhappy people who innately know the falseness, yet, they fall prey to the known.. I just read a comment left on someone’s blog to this ‘A tiger does not lose sleep over the opinion of the sheep’. The comment read ‘I’d like to be a tiger, but sadly being a sheep is easier’. There you are, a confession straight from the sheep’s mouth.
And so maintaining the soulful evolution while trying to eat too – is immensely hard. As you said before the interprenerial spirits take risks and expand into the unknown to them territories, Richard Branson comes to mind… but they still create stale oppressive work structures which do nothing for people on an employee level. BECAUSE the purpose of that business creation was still —–> the satisfaction of self, of own survival interests, even own adventurous spirit, but yet – SELF only.
It is strange how in the spirit of true love we start from a point of self love, but it becomes consideration of ALL as a final evolution step. IF we are brave enough.
So… remember I asked how one marries profit making with maintaining high moral standards? We are back to that, full circle. I would love to see a business which was establsihed and is run on a soulful platform of its employees being part of it in a true sense. From a CEO down to a cleaner. Too much huh…
In fact… I’ve been thinking about this further. Aside from the actual business idea… to attempt and dispense with the oppressive survival politics any business operates on, a business model itself needs to change from a perpetual growth model for the purposes of ‘make
more money and expand’ into an economically sustainable model which ALSO makes its uttermost priority ——> creating a soul nurturing
environment for its participants, while providing the means of material existence.
This kind of model, to begin with, will indeed be a MOVEMENT away from greed mongering, concentrating instead on the overall wellbeing: physical, soul, emotional. And to create this kind of movement, it will need initially to employ people based not merely on their technical skills, but on the level of their evolutionary development, as a working example of such possibility. Sounds discriminating, but hey… if it suceeds, through the high levels of contentment of its employees (both monetary values and soul values) – there will be no shortage of people to join in.
I understand there is no virtue in POVERTY, but there is no virtue in being wealthy beyond what a human being needs – TO BE HAPPY. New gadgets, lots of homes, numerous holidays and private planes are absolutely over the top. To be happy – we need little actually, and it has little to do with our material state of being.. It DOES have something to do with it, but only if we starve. I think Epicurus got it right – modesty in both physical and emotional consumption.
Idealistic, I know… But I am an Idealist through and through. That’s why I keep failing in my interactions with the business side of this heartless world. I need something of MY OWN.
TIGER CUB
My little tiger cub.
One stripe black and another one gold.
A promise of what your future will hold.
**
A lush jungle bush.
Life of reflection will not protect you from fear.
Abandon the hideout, the hunters are getting near.
**
Your simple necessities.
You hunt when the hunger is talking inside.
Their bellies full, they want more – your beautiful hide.
**
Tell them nothing.
Words alone cannot change a crusty heart.
Not will they take those powerful guns apart.
**
Hush, sound of voices.
Mighty humans tracked your round soft paws.
No sad stuffed specimen, you draw out those claws.
**
In the British Museum.
‘A ingenuous tiger teeth necklace’ the note read.
You stand right beside me, Strong Tiger. Enough said.
Damn no wonder this have so much comments.
First i didn’t read the blog thinking it’s a description like any other you can find on the web. But after reading the comments damn i was so curious to read it.
Mainly correct i am a november 8 scorpio and so far that is one of the most written pieces i ever read that describes me … Good writing too!
You better run, run like hell if you’re just fooling around 🙂 Scorpios might look sweet and funny but all the time he spend with you he will be testing and studying your personality and thinking if you will be a good partner one day. That’s why many girls complain her scorpio boyfriend suddenly transforms to something evil and non caring because he just understood that you’re not the correct girl for him, just like that 🙂
Mari once said “I will probably never ever perfectly understand the underworld mysteries”. Well, it’s not that hard to know and feel…
BASIC UNDERWORLD MANUAL
Nothing is difficult to understand about this.
Here is the nature of the abyss
I want you to know….
That composure gained in contemplation
Often breaks down in cold light of the day.
And that is OK.
**
That the butterflies take sudden reign
Like a swamp of vicious wasps in the stomach.
We feel pain.
**
That supreme confidence does not set us free
From feeling at times small and unloved.
Confidence halved.
**
That sometimes tears swell in our eyes
Coming from both sunshine and rain
Cannot explain.
**
That taking each step towards the Sun
Makes the Shadow grow deeper and longer.
Both weaker and stronger.
**
That the fear often acts as a drug,
Blinding us to own perception.
With no exception.
**
That ‘creative’ will always mean ‘tension’
With a smidgen of ‘loss’ thrown in.
All is not ‘win’.
**
That today’s violent gust of emotion
Will replace yesterday’s calm and still.
Again ill.
**
That a great wave of doubt enters these shores
And sweeps us away screaming, into the sea.
Let it be.
**
That the call of the unknown crashes the comforts
Of the familiar, making us hot and queasy.
Nothing easy.
**
That anticipation of the coming day can make us afraid,
And the night becomes a useless comforting buffer.
We suffer.
**
That there are no definite answers to anything
No matter how much we believe and know.
This is flow.
**
That this is a breathing and feeling experience
On the see-saw of daily life and death.
To die and be born every day.
All bless.
I feel that you don’t need a manual… just pure intentions…
You misunderstood me, Mari. I don’t need a manual, I LIVE it. When myself and my Taurean friend compare how we feel, she says to me she
never feels things in the same way, or as intensely as I do, or as much and often as I do. Some of those are truly a mystery to her. So your comment from way back echoed that. Perhaps this is something peculiar to people with strong water in their chart.
Pure intentions, yes. You know.. when one comes from a mind like mine which has never REALLY been childlike and innocent, because I always
noticed how people treat one another with cruelty and lack of love… I was ignorant, yes, but not innocent… it takes much more to convert this into purity.
Ok… Why don’t you try to feel…“ feel intensely”… your reaction to my one line comment. Maybe you will see why you are so fast to get into defensive mode lol! You’d be surprised of what you will discover. I’m sorry but I don’t simply read line by line and get the message. I feel the person’s motivation and intention of doing or writing certain things. I know you will go ballistic with this… but this is my honest comment… I do not feel the sincerity in your writings.
By the way, who’s underworld you are feeling? Is it yours? Or someone else’s underworld? See… maybe it is just your reaction to another person’s energy. But it doesn’t matter … be it this world or that world… am just sharing that one needs to be true and sincere with their intentions. That’s all. Enough of the excuses of the past. I’ve been there, people are mean… life is not fair… blah.. blah… but until when you will stay there?
I know you will come up with another logical response to this comment and try to find wrong with me to simultaneously put me into place lol! You’re still you.
Good luck.
Mari
In answer to your question of whose Underworld… both. This is the energy we have in common. While I have always felt it I never gave it this name – Underworld. Just transited through it on a daily basis.
“but until when you will stay there? ” The abyss never disappears. It is how I work with its effects, not about it going. Not everyone will understand that one.
If you don’t feel sincerity… you could have said this in your first one line comment, no? Instead of going about it in the roundabout way. I prefer honesty.
Yes, I am still me and cannot be anybody else. I write openly and without hiding, so it is always open to commenting.
ive been feeling so incredibly horny lately :)))))
Someone passed away, although she was not my immediate family, death still hits me like a train rack. All though this time we prayed for her, knowing may be it won’t come to what we wish for, nothing still compares to that numbness, shock, and sadness… we all deal with loss so differently…I just want to tell everyone I come across that love yourself, love those who shared life with you, no matter what path we chose to walk, I love you all. I feel the difference, how earlier this year, mourning was so private, death was so intimate, how through that experience, I learned love need to be voiced, unconditionally.
I know now, when the Cosmo want you to experience something, teach you something, there is nothing man-made, mental preparation, planning can shield you from it, like a storm, you are tossed in, and you have to fight your way out of it, or you may be forever lost. this is how we truly learn…
No matter I’m here or not, take care of yourselves, with lots of love.
Hi Jojo, I feel for your loss and you know that I love you too.
I love you all guys … I feel blessed for all the time I have spent in this forum. sniffle…
I couldn’t agree more… if you don’t learn your lesson the same test will be repeated in a harder form. A vicious cycle.
The nature of vulnerability, how it is misunderstood… how it is used as a bargaining tool out there… ‘I will tell you about my pain IF you tell me about yours. I will be prepared to be vulnerable IF you are going to give me the response that I want’… And when people anticipate a different response to what they desire – they become coy, withdrawn, sulking because their ‘vulnerability’ may not be reciprocated. They get consumed by the fear of what they so desperately wish to know – and are afraid to ask or do. TRUE vulnerability is in accepting the uncertainty of the outcome, placing TRUST in whatever is coming your way, that state of no attachment to what will unfold – and ALLOWING self to be open and sincere REGARDLESS. Oh how scary it can be, a free fall into BEING YOURSELF, truly, yet not placing the same expectation on another OR the circumstance… It goes for EVERYTHING. When a life decision is made – it is vulnerability to the risk and its consequences, because in life everything works in random fashion, and even the best of decisions oftentimes bear the unexpected results. How many can completely detach from those and carry on, weaving the way to inner freedom?
And here it is, our vulnerability… when we say to the person ‘I love you’ KNOWING it may never be returned. When we give our true opinion to the manager on their latest initiative, AWARE there may be a backlash. When we start our new business, REALISING there may be a failure. But we do it anyway, because we cannot BE otherwise, our true individuality will not allow it. The individuality unafraid to be TRUE to ourselves which in this heartless world is considered crazy. Real principles do not pay our way and do not put food on our table. And people submit… I was asking how I could be vulnerable again, to trust others not to abuse that… hahaha, not understanding that NOBODY can abuse it or hurt us when we are vulnerable from our core selves. This is the strength, the real one.
And people are scared to be vulnerable, because they are scared of the UNEXPECTED. Of the uncertainty. Of rejection. Of failure. Of being faced with the brick wall. Afraid of NO LOVE. They want TO BE SURE. And life is never about being sure, for every moment will prove us wrong in our innocent desire to stay within limits. We are ALL cowards in one way or another, and simply differ in the area of life we fail TO PLACE OUR TRUST IN. Some are in their romantic relationships, some are in their professional life, some in their attitudes to money and ownership, some in their family committments, we are all afraid to be vulnerable, whether we realise this truth or not. Life of ‘here now and gone tomorrow’ is the only reality, tell otherwise to those who lost people they loved, or those who lost everything and had to start anew. When this guillotine falls – we wake up and see that – there are no guarantees, signed letters, stamped and sealed laws of life… everything is in a flux. Yet, we try for stability and nothing wrong with that at all, as long as we accept that the uncertanty WILL enter out lives and WILL tear everything apart, in one way or another. And often we have to hit rock bottom, when there is nothing left to lose, before we begin to climb out, slowly, still afraid, but may be less so, simply because we learned the lesson – the flow that this life is. And I used to be so care free, but that was not good either, without structure and boundaries, ‘go with the flow’ is self destructive, annihilating the question of ‘Why am I in this life’, a butterfly, innocently happy from own state of ignorance, but never truly free. How does one combine the wisdom of years (awareness of all accumilated fears and restrictions) with the care free (from ignorance) attitude of youth? Where is that point of convergence into fearlessness? I know it is there, but I have to remind myself EVERY BLOODY HOUR about this simple truth. A passage through own Unknown, so profound, I hardly manage to keep up with those feelings and understandings.
Just watched a TV documentary about big cats. For big cats nothing is too small to kill and eat. There was a scene when a mother leopard hunts for warthogs. In the confusion the piglets scattered, she killed the first piglet in seconds, then she finds the second one her grip crushes its lungs, she drops it to look for another one… then she finds the third piglet this one is still alive and she doesn’t kill it. Shaking from fright the piglet looks for warmth and reassurance remarkably the leopard allows it to cuddle. It is her mothering instincts that make her to pause that allows a piglet a reprieve. In one bite the tender moment is gone. The killer is back. She walks off into the fading light her intention to take live prey to her daughter.
So I feel we should not try to tame or change a fearless predator into a cuddly cub lol! Like the mother leopard, it is her nature to kill. She has to be cruel to be a good mother.
The big cat did not kill its daughter. It hunted prey to keep its daughter and self alive. And true predators respect their prey. How? They take ONLY when they need to.
Cruelty does exist, but we do not need to be CRUEL to be ‘good mothers’, to ‘kill’ prey (other humans). We are humans. We need love, not cruelty, to live meaningfully in this world. So when I spoke about peace and love – that was my Piscean Utopia. Except… I wanted it without KNOWING cruelty, but have I not known it? From my early childhood. Yes, I have. Just didn’t let it teach me lessons. But I knew, somehow. The promiss of the soul potential lived on.
True vulnerability arrives at the state of – unconditional. We do not place conditions of a certain outcome, when engaging with people and circumstances. That includes, among many other things – not attempting to change another.
Be well, everyone.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ChOMJrItxI
You are in the collective while Scorpio is the quiet observer. Everything is just a derivation of money…sex….and…….cat.
“True vulnerability arrives at the state of – unconditional”…
Unconditional is a stagnant state. It is akin to the lack of empathy.
You know your true vulnerability when you face death.
Every scorpio knows that. That precious state where you know you can die, but you continue with ….the absence of everything you “know”…
No, unconditional is far from stagnant. It’s this “you know you can die, but you continue with ….the absence of everything you “know”…” There is much to be afraid of in there… and much to take from.
For me unconditional feels closely related to faith… in myself, in another, in the circumstance being my friend, even when it does not feel like that at times and seems a struggle. It feels like… a jump.
Lol! This is happening a lot even in real life. When you caught up someone naked they are sooo fast in defending themselves. There is always a rationalization to save their face or cover up the lies.
Anyway not going to comment any further.
Happy holidays! 🙂
Well… I am not afraid to be naked. And that’s the truth.
I will not be writing here anymore, this should remove the question of my sincerity:)
Mari.. your comment was not from the heart, but from the Ego. It didn not feel true. Past hurts cannot be undone, let it go.
Umm.. you don’t go into lengthy psychological discussions, you are the tangible, and that’s OK, the world needs the tangible to exist. You do not have to live up to anybody’s expectations of you. You were sincere even in your outburst, and I appreciated that. Love who you are, the Artist.
Gatubela.. All the ‘compliments’ that I ever said to you – were not compliments. As you know by now I am (or was) much better at critisizing and bashing, than at giving words of praise. I meant every one of them. You are the person who taught me HOW to love. I will never forget you, in the same way I never forgot that guy who gave me shelter when I was 19, from the purity of his heart and without wanting anything back, remember?
Eagle.. keep writing the poems and keep searching. You are loved, always.
Good bye.
It doesn’t matter Ines if you “think” it is not from the heart. I don’t have to justify myself to you or to anybody, else we would end up defending, debating, proving who is better than who, who have suffered more, who is more publicly nekeeeddd lol, comparing one self to another etc. These are harder than enamel ego based on your own self –delusions. You are saying GOOD BYE, yah… you really need to go out there and start to verb it not just talk. Enough proving yourself, dreaming, obsessing and thinking. You don’t need all these anymore. Enough already….. let it go… let it die…. you really need to rest… rest in peace… in silence…
What a shame that genuine people like this get driven out. ‘I don’t have to justify myself to you or to anybody, else we would end up defending, debating, proving who is better than who’ you’ve done just that in your last posts lol
Women and children everywhere are the love energy. It’s the nurturing instinct. See it. Feel it. This event is why anybody with self-pity in their lives must reflect long and hard and realize that human life is not fair. Innocence is taken away on many levels by the poison of male seeds. This has been happening for five thousand years.
My heart aches for the 27 children and adults who were executed all because of one persons tormented heart. He lacked love and nurturing.
http://news.yahoo.com/principal-among-victims-conn-shooting-rampage-030323209.html
Nurturing ONLY our inner awareness when everything remains the same in the world – is a moral fallacy. Fighting on an individual level is honourable, but results in – locking ourselves in our own back yards content in our understanding, while leaving those others – live ignorant and unfulfilled lives.
The world does not need the next ‘political’ leader vying for the job of ‘I will solve your problems for you’, music to the ears of those weak and unwilling to be accountable for their own lives… and then proceeding to squash every freedom and right to remain individuals and live from the Truth… The world needs those who can AID this understanding of self awareness and conscious living – to SPREAD, like wild fire. From the Inner Evolution into the Outer Manifestation, not the other way around, they are interlinked into One. We are GUIDED by our inner being, but we LIVE in the Outer, and the way we live in it now – is a lie.
This guy speaks the Truth, very poignant, powerful and unique expression on every subject.. Consciousness of an Eagle combined with massive social awareness. He bridges the Inner and the Outer.
I contacted WordPress Editorial team asking them to place this to Freshly Pressed, to aid the distribution, they replied saying they will look into it. VERBING, and he put some thought into this, twenty thousand visitors in only three months says it all.
SPONCOR UNKNOWN
•99% of Males, Don’t Know How to Become Men
•Manhood, requires rigorous training
•A Problem Solving based Educational System
•a sense of History, a means of cultural retaining
•it is was our custom, for a young boy
•to be snatched from his Mother
•after a certain age, she became his ruination
•for feminizing a male, makes him vulnerable
•him to mental, menstruation
•so his Father, sponsored him into the Lodge
•for transformation, from ignorance to knowing
•from fearing, to understanding
•what His role, mission and plan to execute
•Enemies and anything, anyone who gets in the way
•of Him and His People Surviving another Day
•This Culture re-enforces his Identity
•a reflection of His Family, His community, His Society
•this was the basis of His education
•this made Him, the foundation of His Nation
•a Builder during Peace, a Killer enduring War
•a Mason, Master Builder, he’d love
•War, He’d abhor, but He couldn’t neglect
•His ultimate duty was to protect, His Own
•this Lodge was the first Institution destroyed
•by implementing Slavery, Men had to be broken down
•their Manhood crucified, then tried underground
•asleep, deeply asleep, briefly awakened
•after Slavery’s end, there was a trend
•to become Men again, then, the truncation
•by the segregation to integration whirl-wind
•and confusion of roles, gender
•resulting in power given to the Females
•for there are even fewer of them
•disciplined as Women
•now with His role diminished, His self esteem
•no longer the beam in the eyes of his son
•he feels no calling, accountability, responsibility
•towards, Nation, Family, towards no one
•but the Gang, if he’s a part of one
•is his Family, it’s His way back towards
•community, towards Tribe, towards being good
•towards resuscitating His Manhood
•for it burns with self-hate and consumed by
•self pity, but rising by desiring Change
•fighting a ruthless enemy, self destruction
•currently his nation is built with guilt and remorse
•now technology, is a means of exchanging ideas
•through music, conversing in clouds,
•causing a mental change of course
•with affects of slavery vanishing, its seeds
•sown, long gone
•though, like Commander-in Chief, ‘O’, He’s re-entering the Lodge
•Legally and Regally, Status, Sponsor, Unknown…R.D.Revilo
Enjoy.
http://rdrevilo.wordpress.com/about/
damn im so horny today!!!!!!
http://au.lifestyle.yahoo.com/marie-claire/all-about-you/sex/article/-/15951096/new-survey-says-women-want-sex-more-than-men/
Frustrated little Virgo, don’t despair. All Persephone’s want their honeypot begging for more and done the right way, by the right guy, eh?
Why is it so difficult for women to get the right male all the time? There’s droves of neanderthals all over the place, eager with tongue hanging out and overly available to mechanically pump and squirt.Why so much hassle? hahaha.
You’ve spent the last five years on here sharing your understanding of why.. perhaps the same ‘why’ as to why Eagles cannot find their High Priestess?
So what is the purpose of this remark….
Shrug…
I read the survey. It mentions that men´s libido is down, women´s are up and that women feel rejected when their advances are not reciprocated.
What is the key to maintaining the sexual interest of our partner in a relationship? I remember an aries saying to another leo, “Woman, there is nothing to you…you are dead inside and your husband must find a stick more interesting.” She was very interested in appearances so she looked pretty good. But her marriage was not passionate and alive. She has a nice house though.
I feel that in order for women to be more in tune with this passion, they have to be able to dream…because imagination goes against societal stagnation. Men won´t communicate the sexy secret (darn!)
Ines, when you look at everything around you, the point is clear. Creation is how we live, and that lack of joy and cosmic connection is evident when we look out the window.
The survey tells us that women want more sex. And nothing about making love. That concept is not found in “her honeypot” and neither in his dick.
Its discouraging and a friggin´sad state to be in. Rejected cuz he don´t want to have sex with me…
I would prefer to find out why…can I spark a man´s desire? Can I sustain it? And still get old, have stretch marks and make a living?
nah there was no frustration and no despair.. just expressing my natural feelings! felt good
oh and thanks for the article, interesting read.. how the world is changing hey or maybe its just that there is less censorship these days.
2012 has given me an opportunity to step outside of the Known and to explore that which was Hidden in the mists of my mind, desperately wanting to break free. At last it is here. I learned that:
■Fear is an acquired commodity which becomes natural to us as we progress through life. Yet, it is not how we are born. We are born fearless
■Shaping up my own view of the World has set me free, and individual inner freedom is the only path towards creation
■I have an infinite capacity to learn fast and transform my inner landscapes
■Transformation is violent and never pain free, and we need not be afraid of that
■There is no such thing as ‘bad’ weather, either psychological or out in nature. Both sunshine and rain make us feel alive and welcome in the world
■Contemplation is always followed by an insight, developed further through choices to act
■I exchange energies with others and through the energy of solution – I affect and create life
■Each is a Creator, supported by and connected through Anima Mundi, the Universal Soul
■I accept both my beauty and my ugliness, a cocktail of humanness shared with another seven billion people. I choose to walk towards the beauty.
■I will never be perfect, but I am always Whole in this imperfection
■There is a lot of love in the world which we are often blind to see. How I am towards others is how they are towards me. I have an infinite capacity to create love out there, and now it manifests
■Love is in giving and an infinte joy, not pain
■I am never alone, and my soul is forever
■True forgiveness comes only from true love
■I am both feelings and thoughts in equal measure. They are tools to greater self and world awareness
■Little ‘slights’ perceived by us in others are our minds attempting to protect the Ego for survival purposes. It means nothing
■Being truly vulnerable, or being my real self at all times – makes me BE and a true measure of my individuality which may be feared, but never ignored by others
■Looking beneath the surface grants infinite depth and richness of life
■We are One Energy
■I seek and am BECOMING, every day
I am so happy and feel so blessed to be able to live that. To All whom I shared this little corner with – much love and joy and respect, now and for years to come.
This sums up a lot. Those destined to become Eagles – will, Scorpio or not. It’s good to know.
She-Less-Syn-Zone
■More and More Men
■are having less to do with women
■around the their home
■they prefer to live alone
■they are finding a natural nutrient
■Peace and Quiet, a potent vitamin
■allowing their immune system
■to revive, to re-strengthen
■their minds to have time
■to relax, no Xanax
■no Prozac, just relax
■anyone who is met on the street
■never is allowed into the Home
■she calls up, with the drama
■be peaceful as the Dali Lama
■and hang up, keeping your peace of mind
■and resign to do the chores on your time
■Peace and Quiet
■a Living, less stress, even less
■wholesome happi-Ness
■free, of fussing and fighting
■breaking up and re-uniting
■Peace and Quiet
■the dog, the cat, the TV
■the stereo, the only riot
■Peace and Quiet
■We must eat and cook, healthy
■we must exercise
■read, learn, become more wise
■live with Honor, Morally
■males will find this living a bore
■as they chase smoke, pleasure
■materialism, becoming whores
■but that is why, We few
■have become, through self control
■self discipline, Warriors for Life
■what 99% of males can’t become, Men
■a Woman’s voice vibrates our very Soul
■since we all start as feminine
■so any relationship with Women
■begins and ends, with self control…R.D.Revilo
Why is it good to know? Women are no longer welcome in his home. I know it is a poem, but the venus poetic energy only brings out the harsh message. It speaks volumes of what women “are not” nowadays and his painful experiences with them. (although unsaid). His ideals are insinuated, and it seems that there is no woman on this planet that can go past this obstacle that he poetically paints.
I don´t want a man who feels that he has to always control himself with me – as the predominant energy in the relationship. A personal, subjective view, but it was my first reaction. LoL…Blushing…no passion
Women.. are welcome in the home of an Eagle. Girls (I will not reduce them to the word ‘bunny’) – are not. The female side of the energy can be very destructive at its core, bickering, reactivity and a covert form of control are its manifestation. A Scorpio man especially will know that in himself, IF he knows himself. Likewise, any man (for they have female in themselves) who transcended beyond – will know too. That’s the gist of the piece – by putting the phone down he refuses to participate in the meaningless. I see a lot of parallel, my personal perception…
I believe the guy is married, so is speaking from the knowing of what exists in others, whatever his past bitter experiences are… The WOMAN has been found for him perhaps..
Control is not about eliminating passion, for without it we are dead. But a passion – for what? He meant – controlling own male urge to copulate with every remotely attractive female out there. Control own energy not to participate in what is ultimately dead end relationships. There is no need for tests and no need for domination WHEN true love is present. We look into a person’s soul and hold the Light for them, both in us and in them, this ignites and sustains passion.
The passage towards that state is pain, out of the Known ‘I control you any way I can’. Both genders are guilty of the ‘game’. There is no passion in the game, only misery. Until The Woman arrives – there is dignity in Solitude. And I would say – for The Woman too, until The Man arrives. No cheap exchange. Good to know, yes.
“And yet this man who has risen above the thought of the world cares not that other people should sit at his feet. He knows that what he has done all may do, and he well knows that all the teaching in the world will not produce another such as he. He knows that it is not from the teaching but from the being that true greatness springs. So this man does not go around teaching or preaching; he simply IS.”
Ernest Holmes, Creative Mind
http://www.sacred-texts.com/eso/cm/cm03.htm
Teaching and preaching – no. Sharing. Jesus did. It was the sharing of the KNOWING that entered his Consciousness – that got him into Death.
Open crusifiction – then, covert forms of suppression – now.
“Ines, when you look at everything around you, the point is clear. Creation is how we live, and that lack of joy and cosmic connection is evident when we look out the window.”
I acknowledge the Dark (negativity and its different modalities) that seep out of people, but I have a choice not to dwell there, nor generate more of it… It goes against my very nature to look at the World at large and feel mournful. Enough of that. Life is about creating joy, we choose the window we want to look out of. Love builds people up, not breaks them down, and the Source is endless. A true leader or a conscious person can elevate folks to a higher level, not push them into the pit. I do that, so I know it is possible. The sunshine costs nothing, and we get back what we put out there… mirror principle, right?
I don’t know about feeling rejected from offering sex… Sex is being offered to me instead… thanks, but no. Sparking a man’s desire is easy. Sparking his heart/soul.. There is no ‘sexy secret’.. awoken men love women who
grant them freedom of being their best male selves, with a sense of playful challenge and a promise of a thoughtful and dedicated journey together. Why? A woman in her best feminine self, elevated to the level of truthful living means one simple thing – being autonomous through providing for her own ‘needs’.
Sustaining being fully alive inside (passion) in both people in personal love is far greater achievement (to me) than universal detached love. Personal love is the true test of one’s ability to love – warts and all. Including stretch marks. Including personality manifestations. Including that which will eventually bring one devastation – loss of the one we love – through physical Death. Personal love spells personal responsibility in love. I’ve seen too many men (including my father and my ex) drifting from one relationship to another, making babies and none of them ever stopped and asked themselves what the fuck love truly means to them.
I knew one eye candy Leo woman. Nothing wrong with that, but she valued the state of her highlights far more than the state of her marriage. They divorced, as far as I know. She was so innocently self centered it was even
endearing to a point, for I felt her as big hearted at core.. she just didn’t recognise others as existing alongside her. But then I know another Leo woman in my reality who is very spiritual and aware.
Gatubela,
I am exploring the subject of psychopathy and found this very frank blog. I thought of your ex. The guy is a diagnosed, as well as self confessed psychopath, who went to prison for murder at the age of 18. People mix psychopathic behaviour with psychosis, which is nothing but. Psychopaths have one major trait: they are unable to put themselves into another person’s shoes, meaning no ability to feel empathy, and especially for fellow human beings.
He is intelligent above the norm, and frankly admits to his being different, nearly a superior robotic race. I found it quite absorbing to read, especially since he also answers questions that people ask.
http://www.psychopathicwritings.com
The study suits your black soul, political agenda and fear right down to the-T. A nice assimilation for your needs, for sure. Your dark negative associations to all that is real and revealing within yourself is not exactly endearing. It is parasitic. Whoops… there goes that word again.
Damn feeble, pathetic implications. Sick.
You are what you read “and study”.. and you are what you believe to be true. Make sure you stay your distance from me. I only experience sickness when I read you.
Cowardice manifest… always in the unwritten, and unsaid.
Two words that epitomize the true essence of your life down to the marrow:– Chicanery. Skullduggery.
You should contact the writer of that blog. Seriously. Together your “theories” of pseudo-intellectualism by diagnosing people from inside a tiny, self-serving ego-box, can honestly compliment your fearful lives so nicely.. just like two mice ‘existing’ with each other in a lab.;))
This was addressed to Gatubela, not to you:)
You called me a psychopath, and I took the time to understand what it actually means, and I thought of her ex. It is not a study, but a blog, a PERSONAL account from within, there is a difference.
You say ‘unsaid’, but without saying why. I am not going to jump to conclusions here.. What was unsaid? Can you be upfront with me about what you saw in my writing? Ask if you want to know, and I will tell you, no cowardice. But please do not imply things. I would appreciate it if you didn’t tell me what I should or should not do, it is not up to you.
I seem to certainly trigger something seriously inky dark within you, and you always smell danger. If you cannot be upfront and talk like an adult, please don’t. Your knee jerk reactions… are not my issue.
Last night, at around 00:20 British time you were intensely cursing me (?) inside. Lasted for about five minutes:)
He is able to put himself in others shoes Ines….that truly is worse than a psychopath.
Sex – or rather love making – is a nice, hot topic….what the heck is your problem? Its a scorpio forum.
LOL by all means… I am not a Scorpio. I found the blog fascinating and thought you might be interested. It was a comment to you only, that’s all.
But the presence of intense energy in my room last night, and without a shadow of a doubt, who it belonged to… There was anger there, but it was not all negative, and it was sudden, like a typhoon… I HAD to note the time, that’s how unusual it was… I am not kidding. THAT was surreal, or I am crazy.
Cold hearted woman – thinking that I would be interested in reading mind of a psychopath.
You live in a fantasy world that has no empathy with people´s suffering.
When I was 11, once my mum was at work, and I was doing what young girls are not supposed to… and I spoke to EVERY OBJECT in the room (TV, wardrobe, chairs and tables, all), ASKING those not to tell my mum.. I was absolutely convinced all was alive and part of me… the fantasy world protected me from all the dirt around… until… six years later I left home for good…
When Scorpio Mars said I was not meant for this world… I guess he had a point, part of ‘her’ never died.
Reconciling this level of naivety with what takes place out there ( and I felt and saw and experienced what did take place out there) was beyond what I could manage at the time. The Light went out.
Two little mice… in love LOL
youtube.com/watch?v=3pxgV1Icu8A
I am saying this to you gently… there is no bravery in exposing others’ faults. There is bravery in acknowledging one’s own and trying to work on those. I have, openly, both here and elsewhere.
I asked for forgiveness of all the abuse that I dished out here, for myself. And I asked myself to forgive you for all that you said in the past. True forgiveness comes from the heart and soul. I know I have now, because your comments do not bring up any negative feelings in me. I see past silly words.
Love is expressed in different ways and may not be what another wants or expects. I am sorry we cannot seem to reconcile our ways. And I cannot change your perceptions of me. I simply accept, without wanting you to think any different. That’s OK, Eagle.
I wrote this a couple of weeks back:
“I hate the title of ‘disorder’, I really do. The Manual of Mental Disorders is a contrived thing, listing every human emotion as some sort of ‘disorder’. To me most of those ring emotional immaturity through developmental and
cultural and personal history of the one with the ‘disorder’.”
We all express strange behaviours. Every psychologist will tell that there is no ‘norm’ out there. What makes it a dis-order is when it begins to interfere with our inner balanced state, and we cannot willfully get out of it. Which a lot of people can’t and accept this self defeating choice, making it into a lifetime habit. Then it is the clue that our soul is not in the right place.
I explored Narcissism, then Borderline Personality Disorder. All people manifest those to a degree. I had a heated debate during my counselling class where most people wanted to break confidentiality if the person is ‘this’ or ‘that’. I.E. report to authorities. Not ONE actually reminded themselves that counselling is not about protecting the rest of the World from the person opposite or policing their behaviour. Putting oneself into another’s shoes is a damn hard thing. WITHOUT preaching. WITHOUT giving advice, especially from own experiences. WITHOUT shallow sympathy. WITHOUT mentally
labeling them. WITHOUT projecting. WITHOUT splitting. WITHOUT feeling defensive. To me the counselling session confidentiality is absolute. Psychology was born out of Ministry tradition, and sanctity of confession is just that. Or else that person will go back to their little den, fester within their own fantasies and illusions and will carry them out in real life, perhaps by taking that gun to the streets. No one loves the lizard, right? Everyone just wants to ‘fix’ other people, ply them with drugs, or ‘solve’ their problems for them. NO. They are capable of fixing themselves, if given a chance.
And if you ever stayed on the phone to a person who is right there, that very moment, is taking their own life, and you hear it slipping away, and in the end of it are met with SILENCE, the finality of it…. and there is NOTHING you could do about it, other than be there and fucking support their choice, no matter how damn awful it is – you would have understood that point of mine – about being there for another, not your own feelings. Intellectualism does not even get close to that experience.
But you can’t. Why can’t you? And you talk about sex instead… and about the blackness of this world… and about black human souls… never asking what the solutions are. We need the energy of solutions, not the energy of condemnation.
I can love you, but I don’t have to love your Darkness, IF you are unable to see the Light, in yourself and others.
Pet dogs have a purer goodness radiating from their true essence more than you’ll ever cultivate in this and many other lifetimes. Animals are INSTINCTIVELY true… yet they do not need to project an “intelligence” while being alive through their existence.
On a higher spectrum, the spirit of babies, children and lovable women dwarf you.
I will invest my energy with them.
You are the common myth among the many impressed by the infatuations of ego attachments and self-fulfilling, outward seeking prophecies. Not a being. A being is an old soul, a learned warrior, cloaked in flesh. Not a spirit. A spirit IS love. A spirit does not ‘think’ it’s love. Heck I’ve deciphered cows mulling on daisies as having far more grace and honorable essence than you’ll ever ‘be’.
I am not the compliment for what you think you want or need in life. Because you are an Alien to yourself. And you always will be.
You’ll never know yourself through death of personality, transformation of feeling, perceptive self-discipline, the principles of integrity, giving, honor, good cheer, adventure and love. The awakenings felt in an infinite existence.
I don’t heal cancer long past it’s remission, or play with it.;)
You know…. it’s strange, the more you bash me, the more detached I feel, it’s like a shield inside…
Anyway.. I do miss talking to you, but without despair if you can understand that… just miss your iconoclast spirit. That was the most precious to me, believe it or not.
Be well, really really well, take good care of yourself, OK?
You know, Puppy.. Einstein said once “Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid” And that’s the wisdom… honouring who I am, true to WHATEVER my state of being. If I don’t love this fallible human and don’t have faith in her, who else will?
You want what I cannot give you – purity of soul, innocence of mind and Sovereignty of Spirit. My spirit is innocent, it is confirmed by all the people that know me. But my mind is not. I could not remain that flower, that puppy I once was. That’s the sad truth. I do admire and love you, but I do not know you in real life.. Are you? Are you not? Because our expression here, each one of us, is only the tip of the iceberg of who we are. My mind… always questions… until my soul knows without a doubt. That’s the crux of it really… People write the most amazing works, but turn out to be something else in real life. Perhaps you always felt this degree of mistrust in me, and I know it is not endearing, but that’s how it is, and I am sorry about that. At least it is the Truth.
And I want what you cannot give me – Joy from exploration of what life is all about, and through a personal connection. Without looking over my shoulder, without asking those questions, without walking on eggshells..
WITHOUT DOUBT, can you understand that? I simply want the freedom to trust without doubt… we never did. I have a fearless gipsy dwelling in me, which moved from place to place, in awe of all the diversity of this life and its people… That’s who I am really… free in spirit, but tied to the form of what is now in my life, and feeling trapped in it. It has to change….
Well.. I guess this truly is the end of us knowing each other. The distance that you want – is yours.
I hope you had the bucket nearby to throw up:)
Love
Ness
Joy. Yes:) Through the pain and the thorns.
Post 1469..))
I know… but it was a lifetime ago…
Please do not throw your energy with me… I have a lot of love in my life, and infinite reserves in my heart to sustain me. You took me through to this point.. so.. there are no words.. maybe you will feel what’s unsaid.. because I cannot say it…
That’s all.
You say I am a Black Soul Rider,
That I belong in a murky sewer.
You say my faith will never burn brighter,
That I am neither Thinker or Doer.
**
You say I prefer to seek adulation,
Dismissing sincerity of my writing.
You say I am nothing but manipulation,
A dumb blond who thrives on fighting.
**
You say I am a sycophant leech,
Parasitically sucking your good intention.
You say I am an impersonated breach
Of all that’s considered love creation.
**
You say I am a maggot destined to fester
On a heap of leftovers from evolved humanity.
You say I am an Ego riddled tester
Of your balance and your inner sanity.
**
You say that cows and puppies dwarf me
In the expression of grace and inner nobility.
You say I am a soulless politician
Used to maneuvering amidst hostility.
**
And I know my infinite ‘Ego-egg’ love
Observing your ‘Ego-less’ crushing of bones,
Will carry me from within… through above,
While you cast.. the first Biblical stones.
**
I say my heart and my spirited voice
Anally fisted from all you convey
Is slowly waking to one simple choice:
In my life… matters not… what you say.
****************
I am not your perceptions…. The Martyrdom is truly over, my beautiful Ghost:)
youtube.com/watch?v=wUK2QmdUXas
Hey Gatubela,
thinking of you, and your sweet soul.
found this picture a while back, just love the expression on the face!! xxx
http://www.google.com.au/imgres?q=cat+shower+cap&hl=en&sa=X&tbo=d&biw=1268&bih=629&tbm=isch&tbnid=uJgTnWHxnglV_M:&imgrefurl=http://www.thenewyorkoptimist.com/LindaScmoldtSpiffyKittyJune30_2012.html&docid=qYBzgNSk5K_rCM&imgurl=http://www.thenewyorkoptimist.com/images/ShowerCapKitty.jpg&w=300&h=272&ei=oiUQUbXeIMrmmAXbw4DYDw&zoom=1&ved=1t:3588,r:35,s:0,i:196&iact=rc&dur=623&sig=103310719094356465366&page=2&tbnh=178&tbnw=192&start=19&ndsp=25&tx=92&ty=83
Did not see the correlation between the picture and your comment about my sweet soul.
I have not survived looking gorgeous and being that worried about my looks and physical appearance, although maybe that is the impression I have given.
I guess you have to wax constantly, Some parts must be more painful than others.
hehe o Gatubela, funny girl 🙂 i was just trying to put a smile on your face, as i thought it was a cute and funny pic and you being a leo and all and that you like cats ( i thought you did). nothing more in it, and i wasnt at all implying you were being vain. just a simple silly pic. 🙂
Yes, I do have a pussy cat. She is a bit disorganized and wild. Does not want to stay inside and always wants to explore.
I did laugh – alot.
I rarely use a bathing suit,don´t do water sports….
….so I guess yer kitty is spiffier than mine.
not my kitty.mine would probably claw me if i tried to put a cap on its head.mine is also a bit wild.. he likes to roam at night..gets that mad enlarged pupil look. ill see if i can rustle up a pic of him.. he is very affectionate though as well…and rather handsome
http://www.uniken.unsw.edu.au/sites/default/files/styles/colorbox_slide/public/images/Dolphin_HighRes.JPG?slideshow=true&slideshowAuto=true&slideshowSpeed=4000&speed=350&transition=elastic
Black Soul… or maybe, a black and white thinking? Nothing in the middle:)
The Spirit… is not an individual identity passing from body to body. If you think that you have not really felt the nature of reincarnation. It is like a drop of water born from the Universal Ocean of Consciousness: separated from it for a lifetime, then going back into it. Other drops will be born again, but they are not that same drop that you are now. But they are still water, bear all its qualities and sometimes a residual memory. Do you have one? We are not personal entities in this world, but our material forms ‘think’ we are. The Soul will not be the same one that inhabits you or me now. It will be a distinctly different entity. We all are Old souls in that way. If one transcends material infatuations, is able to WORK with Ego (not fight it, there is a difference), is benevolent by nature and is Love – he/she is an Old soul.
I have known that since young, although I don’t know how. This is what gives any Piscean an impersonal, detached nature. We feel One with that which cannot be named or identified, yet is real and it speaks very loudly in my
reality. This voice is often problematic, because it is in contrast to the ways of the material world.
We do not really die, we cannot… For those who transcended on a physiological level – personalities simply cease to exist. For others, like you and I – own Consciousness has to be trained, like a dog, literally. It’s possible, too. Our personalities do not have to ‘die’. They just need to be reined in, consciously and mindfully. To fight that which is an intrinsic part of the human form is only to give it strength. What we resist… Can you feel that wisdom?
I wish that you were more constructive in the way you talk, instead of mindless accusations. I felt for a time that I am the only one who was affected by our exchange. I know without a doubt now that it worked both ways:)
I haven’t felt much recently, neither negative or positive. It is disconcerting, since I am usually always feeling something. But I am beginning to see the Light at the end of a very long tunnel that has been…. Joy, remember? Still.. I am grateful for having met you.
The spiritual bond resembles in many ways that of a relationship between the Master and his disciples, does not matter if Buddhism or Jesus or whatever. It works both ways, if the spiritual Master stands firm on the Truth and nothing else, and the disciple is able to perceive that wholeheartedly and see the Buddha in the Master.. The DEVOTION becomes absolute, the kind of spiritual love that makes the bond stronger.
But it’s not enough. Human Ego will inwardly protest at first by saying ‘The Master is only human, how can he be the embodiment of the Buddha?’ This, again, is treated by the Master with appreciation that we ALL have the Buddha in us, including his doubting disciple. The spiritual Master have FAITH in his disciple, in that they have the capacity for deep realization and transformation. The faith of his Master is what gives the disciple the strength to go on and the devotion both to the Master and the path.
So how could you do this… how, Puppy? Did you see that Buddha in me, like the great Buddhism Masters? You DOUBTED me all the way spiritually… a form of hypnosis repeated again and again ‘You will never evolve, you will never understand, you will never perceive, you know no Truth and will remain in your ignorance forever’… never, never, never… constantly displaying this mistrust you eroded my faith in YOU and myself… Remember, when I had my first breakthrough, there was no doubt in me at that stage? Remember how I said my trust was absolute? It was, I meant it. And then I stumbled, and you came crushing down on me with the full force of your PERSONALITY again, and doubt returned, and never left after that… Do you remember how I struggled to understand things when we corresponded, and now I am nowhere near that lack of realization… What did you feel now when again and again wiping out the fragile seedling of faith and hope that I was becoming to cultivate? Did you feel anything? Or were you, like you said, razor focused in your Hades, detached and satisfied with the end result? I am only 15 months old, we all doubt, and yes, I doubted my ability to grow, to move, to evolve, through your harsh words I doubted your intent and the strength of your spiritual love. You have six years ahead of me, I knew absolutely nothing about spiritual matters, Mistrust breeds mistrust and doubt. Love gives birth to love. One… ONE kind word from you, one indication of belief, instead of systematic condemnation could have changed the dynamics completely. how could you do this, Puppy… and you feel what? vindicated that this Black Heart deserves what she got? I know I am not and never have been what you called me, this is not an issue. Your lack of belief in the ability of those you talk to – for genuine wish to grow… is the most crashing of all that took place, that seedling constantly pulled out of the soil and needing to ground itself again and again… and the dynamics between us were nothing like with others, and how could two innately beautiful people fail so completely to communicate that beauty to one another… this world is One, and our minds are One, yet we FAILED so spectacularly…. Love those for who they are, and love those for who they are not… it has nothing to do with Personality, you gave me a sense of healthy Ego, which was not there to start with, and to become ego-less one has to have that first, so yes, my personality grew healthy, if nothing else, but you… you thought all of this will be surface feelings? You thought for me it will be conversations about sex and dinners and jobs and psychology and wanting to compete with you and nose in your affairs? How little you really know me…
I can do it on my own.. this spiritual desert, I have to start from scratch, to instill this belief in myself, to trust my own capacity to go on. But how could you, Puppy:( This is my sense of grief after days of feeling nothing… not over you, but over your lack of belief in people… And I don’t want anything, I am on my own now.
“Love gives birth to love. One… ONE kind word from you, one indication of belief, instead of systematic condemnation could have changed the dynamics completely”…
Its not dependant on that Ines…the love that you seek, that is. Because what you seek,more than being dependant on “words”..or “whatever you are feeling from him.”. I mention this, because you have often said that he sends “negative energy” etc.
Everytime you say “I am on my own now…” is like you feel that you had no spiritual responsibility before this, to “be on your own”? You are not like this with your son…so what is the issue here? Its like you are saying something, and meaning the exact opposite.
May I ask where you put your will into?
Yeah..mistrust is a serious issue…lol. But it goes deeper than that for me. Mistrust does not truly exist. What exists is our reaction to adverse experiences, which is subjective depending on what you are used to. Anyone going to another culture, will feel these differences, after “loosing” due to “not getting what you want when you “knew” you were right.”
The experience is unpleasant – but one bad experience, becomes an exponential life philosophy and the generalization stagnates the rest of our interactions, due to “protecting”. So, what are you protecting, when you mistrust?
I sure hope it is worth it…
P.Puppy,
For “egos” taking freedom of speech away or controlling you, that´s the hard reality of life. You won´t be the strongest, but I guess you will go down fighting? Yeah, I know that one. So actually, some things did come to me…
How would a “weak” person, learn to not to succumb to controlling energies? Is there a place on earth for this kind of person? Because the deeper reality of what you are saying is conflictive, and loaded with “knowledge of humanity”…I admire that confidence. I know what it takes. But not everyone is “strong” like you are and can calmly say “then they have another thing coming.”
If controlling energy does not exist, then of course, you say we are being. But it also means the killing of ego, while the “dominant” personality expresses over the…..what?
What I am trying to say, is that there is magic in personality. And there is magic in the lack of one.
“How would a “weak” person, learn to not to succumb to controlling energies? Is there a place on earth for this kind of person?…”
If we are fully conscious of our own values, if we do not have a personal structure of principles which WE LIVE BY… then the harsh revelations of karma and mortality in life hit home. Life is about people. If we don’t grow from our experiences found in the choices we’ve made with people, we can’t succumb to controlling energies.
“If controlling energy does not exist, then of course, you say we are being.”
People are attached baby. Just observe the severe attachments people demonstrate in the material world. The material world is afraid. Thus ‘attachments’ mean control too. If you really ‘see’… people are more attached TO PEOPLE than they are their possessions or money. So the questions from that understanding are: Do those people “know” if they’re attached for spiritual meanings? Or are they too blind to know who and why they are involved with people?
The truth is most people are together in family-friend circles-groups-relationships… because, as I’ve said all along, TO STAY SAFE, eat well, prosper, and have a body next to them when they wake in the morning. That description of what I’ve said there is the reality of superficial relationships. Remember a perception of life on deeper levels is the key FOR NOT SETTLING with that Leave it to Beaver existence.
Gatubela, you said some things which resonate with me. We can talk in private if you wish, other than that I have not much to say here anymore.
My Gravatar has email address.
Correction… I do have much to say, but do not want to say it here:)
“after “loosing” due to “not getting what you want when you “knew” you were right.”
I wish it was that simple. Plain, based on undiluted human desires, the ‘need’ to have and a crush when it was not ‘met’.. wet vaginas and a green salad dream…I NEED to find the words for this one… to describe what feels so real and certain…
OK…. can you feel the eternal timelessness of all that has been conveyed here, Cat? It is not to be found anywhere else, do you know that? Eternity… is scarily real, it sends the pulse racing, and numbs the Mind. Where we meet all that we were, all those we knew, all those that are now and all those we will lose to time. Including ourselves AND those we do not even know yet. It is vast, colourless and has no end or beginning, deathless. It is populated by countless probabilities of what the World has been or yet to be.. and even numerous reincarnations of
what our lives are/be. ‘In there’ you and I and others are not separated, but are part of the enormous mass, I have no way of giving it a visual form… Connections formed IN THERE are diamond hard and cannot be severed. It is MORE than the connection to the individual who represents the Truth, it is the connection to the Truth itself, individual only
the Conductor of it.
We do not just fall in love with the Conductor or their Soul. We fall in love with the Truth they represent if we have the capacity to see it clearly. IN THERE neither Time or Personality have no meaning. It gets deeper. No end. Time on Earth is driven by Personality which we ‘like’ or not, the wilted green salad ready to perish any day. IN THERE personality melts like a Snowman under the Sun. Eternity, even in insignificance of all that is outside of it… is never painless, never simplistic, never easy…
That’s why it hurts to know that the Forever is found ‘No Where Else’. Acceptance of what can never be altered in there is heart shattering, no CONTROL AT ITS ABSOLUTE EXPRESSION…. It IS. It always BE.
Making a leap from the Underworld to Eternity is scary… my reality before I came here and after… has become exponentially more and more complex… while the heart touches the Simplicity of relating, my Soul is gasping from the snowball of complex existential feelings and the depth of vision presented by them. Yes, brutal. I am not sure I wanted to go THAT deep, but too late now.
“You have six years ahead of me, I knew absolutely nothing about spiritual matters..”
Knowing, means we are Being. We are becoming. Knowing is not separate. Personality is separate from the Source. Depth perception between two people is not “six years” apart. It would not matter if I am a million physical years ahead of you. Consciousness in not a lower-mind virtue.
“The spiritual Master have FAITH in his disciple…”
You are not my disciple. Nor is anyone else through my being (or intent). You have conjured that myth through your intent. The fact that you believe this was my intent, fools you again–> Your lack of center and identity in the human world.
“..Mistrust breeds mistrust and doubt. Love gives birth to love. One… ONE kind word from you, one indication of belief, instead of systematic condemnation could have changed the dynamics completely. how could you do this, Puppy… and you feel what?”
The amount of mistrust running through you is not my responsibility to evoke trust.
Kind words do not matter, have not mattered from me with you. Peace at any cost is not a growing soul. Harmony does not equate to progress. A quart does not fill a gallon. Experience has always been my teacher, my guide, through relating. In contrast you don’t value, nor comprehend the value of sincerity and change. Earth on the rise worships it’s fixed little world. You value political implications across a public audience, to feed insatiable insecurities and ambivalence. Of which you choose to analyse your own way.
My mistrust is merited according to the energy present. Always has always will. Words themselves are insignificant to me when I communicate with others. Your concealment, subterfuge and enjoyment of pressing buttons sans a higher purpose, does not resemble the truth of passion in my realm. True passion understood within my realm, is not detrimental or cancerous to the mind. Passionate expression does not justify feeding ones insecurities to regain ego control in the dynamic. I’m the only person who has absolute control over me. Whomever challenges that integrity, has felt the outcome. Thus if you want control of me you will experience the results of that intent. I only need one lesson in anything to learn and see. To know ‘what’ people really are. It is not my responsibility to affect change in others reality when the recipient cannot comprehend what is truth and what is manipulation through exchanges. One person who uses refined discretionary expression of-self, and another who fails to see MEANING through reception and expression, is again futile and vain.
I’m at the stage where I speak free of censorship. Because I am my own most discerning censor. Any ego who thinks they can take that right from me has another thing coming.
“This is my sense of grief after days of feeling nothing… not over you, but over your lack of belief in people..”
I believe the intentional goodness of about 30 people here on this forum alone, and thousands among my outside world. I’ve demonstrated in writing who I am. I have Not hypothesized about who I think I am… or ‘could’ be.
True self-knowledge is not uncertain of it’s desire, not closed off, but forever understanding of the whole. Not critical. Just discerning through knowing.
Tamed desires are the apex of self mastery. Seeing ones-self with intense depth and knowing, then focusing that gaze upon the brutal world present within ALL:)
A kind word is NOT about achieving peace, Puppy.. and it is not about the word itself… a kind word has the power to OPEN THE HEART. It does wonders in elevating people to the Truth.. I saw it happen here, the floodgates of awareness and truth, the inner catharsis when YOU chose to respond in kindness… I saw it happen in real life too. If you don’t have that key – your ‘war kit’ is only half full. Demolition is only half the battle, and if you feel no responsibility about what happenes after you have done it – then this is where we differ vastly. I feel responsible for all the stuff that I said here that could potentially cause damage, to you or to others. I didn’t know what I was creating at the time. There IS responsibility in love.
So the intent… one goodness of intent – nurturing the uniqueness of the individual that we communicate with, through transmitting loving energy. This is the one and only Truth. I don’t feel it from you towards me. But loving energy comes in various forms, you can say that yours is volcanic in nature… I accept that, but mine is not all loving words either. Which makes our love energies antagonistic?
Sincerity for me is not about goodness of intent. It is about being true to my feelings as and when I communicate them. If I communicate them so that another can see those clearly, at least another then knows where I stand. I have to learn to communicate them sensitively, yes. You talk about how you perceive the world, me, others, you never actually communicate how you FEEL about anything. It is not sincerity, not to me.
Having those feelings and telling you or anyone about them does not constitute manipulation. I know and understand the dynamics between us well, it is a mix of both our personalities and our Higher selves, I feel which one is talking in each sentence… I cannot control the outcome of each interaction, it would be a lie. Nor do I want to change your perceptions/feelings of me, that would be a lie too. It seems you have a much bigger issue with control than I do, as you keep bringing it up again and again:)
I never said I believe I am your Disciple. It was about the nature of spiritual love based on absolute trust. Absolute trust to me is keeping another’s interests and heart as my own. Again, I do not feel that from you towards me specifically.
As for BEING Higher Consciousness… I know ONE person in real life who achieved that state. When you learn to observe your inner turbulence without throwing it at another through name calling etc… and when I stop being the Drama Queen without dumping my immediate emotional states on you…. when we both learn to detach and observe the true Emptiness of the Mind, with all that enters and leaves it…. we can talk about that. It will take more than just loving intent, though. I want you to be sincere with me too. FEELING sincere, not LIFE PHILOSOPHY sincere.
Like you, I trust my inner workings, now more than ever. They are not concepts from books either, they were given to me from birth, you awoke most of that inner wisdom, the Light, for that I thank you. I trust people who know me in real life as open and sincere, too. Maybe being sincere and having ability to communicate it in writing are two different things…. I do feel that one day in the future you will step closer to some values that I feel I failed to communicate here, in the same way as I now feel the nature of yours. Again, only love gives birth to love. And true love is expressed in loving ways, even in fighting.
So here it endeth:) All my love to you, and I truly wish you well.
Dang it… intuition.. it’s SO simple. The soul always knows. yet the Ego protests… it is not what I should, ought to, have to do… this is just the entrenched habit of following the head. The inner voice and intuition are THE SAME, the soul’s voice.. some feelings are followed by immediate gratifying actions, a temporary relief from discomfort, which will return in full force… People would do anything to avoid the immediacy of discomfort… then a crush, because the Soul knows it has been cheated upon. The vicious circle starts again then… the inner discontent grows, the gap gets bigger, more and more temporary solutions, the pain intensifies… Ego and Pain walk hand in hand. And some ACTIONS, when followed from listening to the Voice – will feel very uncomfortable, drenched in sweat and tears, yet they ultimately lead to inner peace. The soul’s order has been delivered, cut through fear, through discomfort, through pain… it arrives at peace. In there somewhere the pain stops being the pain and becomes experience of reaching out to oneself.
And it can be anything, as small as listening to your body for the signs of food discomforts to choosing a job or a country to live in… Actually, the corporal awareness is the first stepping stone to real intuition. The body knows much more than the head, I had a chance to find out for myself.. The body talks through thousands of signs, an intrinsic language we have lost understanding of.
I didn’t have a clue what real intuition is… until now. That is it. When and how one starts walking back to oneself is really insignificant, a very personal journey… soulful decisions are contrary to own Ego dynamic, every time.
and so the Soul becomes its own ultimate authority. Who am I but the Knowing from the Oneness where there is no ‘good’ or ‘evil’, but ALL is simply BE, in own everlasting beauty, no matter how ugly the Ego says it is. The Ego becomes the balloon deflating into the insignificance… I feel that I’ve just released something.. lighter, it makes me laugh, don’t know…
Hi Gatubela, nice hearing your input.
“For “egos” taking freedom of speech away or controlling you, that´s the hard reality of life. You won´t be the strongest, but I guess you will go down fighting? Yeah, I know that one. So actually, some things did come to me…”
I’ve said all along that War is an innate part of my evolution. Discernment, in my world, means picking those battles (war) wisely. In my past lives (in this life) my personality and willpower was dissolute and passive. It was careless and reckless. So I could not identify a myriad of mind energies from others that were eroding my spirit and happiness.
The lower level of Pisces, and I’ve seen this first hand with Pisces people… is that they’d rather ‘laugh off’ ANY and all negative social energies, meaning they’d shrug off controlling intentions from others, then they’d ABSORB others fears, jealousies, pains, stresses, manipulations and insecurities–> INTO THEMSELVES.
What happens is a vicarious absorption sans discrimination of others true motivations and their controlling possessiveness. Or others attachments which hold no meaning to the Pisces nature. Thus the Pisces nature WOULD BECOME possessive, jealous, pain riddled, confused, stressed and totality adrift with themselves. So their relationships would suffer as well as other areas of their life. So they’d be totally adrift from their– Center. (Sun-Identity-Expressed Light).
Thus this is why incredibly sensitive Neptune nature people FALL INTO ADDICTIONS…such as drinking, video games, sex, TV, time wasting, etc…
I know this social passivity, because I was there. I too have very psychic Neptune energy within me. It’s like nothing anybody says or does to you ever matters (in that overloaded social vicarious oceanic energy.)
But Neptune is only one planet. Fortunately for me, the presence of mind I have administered/activated via soul consciousness is not the reality of sorrow and self-sabotage described above. My life is all the other planetary forces/gifts, which has “fought” (how ironic) that passive lackluster indifference off. That’s a summary of my personal war.
So…
I now have personal boundaries. — Which is highly un-Neptunian.
I now have a willpower. — Which is highly Un-Neptunian.
I am now AWARE of my psychic-self and the affect of my growing social identity through the collective matrix of every persons mind reality bouncing of each other. Imagine a crowed boisterous bar, with me standing right in the middle. — Which is highly Un-Neptunian.
I now have expansion of mind resulting in psychological strength and acuity based on psychic social discrimination. — Which is highly Un-Neptunian.
So in order to maintain those immense inner- dimensional resources, my connection to the Source must remain entirely clean, alert and sober. No TV. No meaningless friendships. No Drunkness. No libido addictions and utterly no indifference to life matters, including love, control manifestations and deceptive energies.
So aside from my nature being partly war prone Gatubela…. I still dream, I still have a dazzling imagination, I still am very practical and organizational, I still pick up astounding information from people in my environments.. BUT… my inner worlds ARE FULLY CONSCIOUS of all of that now.
The unconscious Pisces/Neptune influence said earlier, is light years from seeing themselves as separate AND whole simultaneously.
So yes Gatubela, of course I have a personality. It may sparkle in many dimensions now, strictly because the veil of my Neptunian illusions “to escape” the brutal lessons of this earth (it’s people), thus the collective unconscious has forever been transcended.
So when I say “death of personality”, I’ve always meant ‘Change’ or transcendence of personality through a incredibly complex universal truth.
To cap this off.
Leo is the sign where ego-self/personality is at it’s summit. All Leo’s have such strong identities, that their “reality” most of the time is not real among a universal identification among society.. I mean it’s ‘like a dream’ for Leo. Leo is ultimately very SELF oriented. This means that SELF for Leo is not in conduit with the matrix of humanity among us. Which is Aquarius/Uranus consciousness, their opposite.
So when I say Leo’s don’t see life as “real”… what I mean is that consciousness is possessed of the self, just like our Sun. The Sun’s immense gravitational pull ‘expects’ all the other planets to dance and admire the Sun’s beating heart. Nothing outside that solar “reality” really exists. I’m not referring to you Gatubela. I’m talking about the scores of Leos I’ve known through psychic experience. Ya see little Leo?
This above… is true, yes.
You can talk like that to others, but here you chose not to talk to me in this way, bar once or twice. Perhaps you felt I wanted more from you, and at the time it was so. But things have changed. Mortal desires have no true hold over a long period of time, and people stop truly caring for one another if this is all that bound them together in the first place.
I feel much more of your true beauty in that than in anything you chose to throw my way. And it does make me feel the pain of miscommunication.
BTW… every single human being has Neptune in their psyche. The main thing I was illustrating is that addictions, indifference and social unconsciousness is riddled throughout millions of souls. Their lives are lived unconsciously. Thus the jealousies, greed, crime, confusion, self-illusion and despair in human nature.
So I’ve experienced all signs as alcoholics, sex addicts, love addicts, gamblers, time drifters, etc. Neptune is that planet so elusive within people’s craniums, they simply don’t know how to handle it.
Life on earth is savage;)
Also, I’ve come up with a solution on how to deal with those spontaneous emotional states and ground them, maybe people will find it helpful.
I felt a tingle of sadness cutting through a calm and content state of mine. Of course I knew the origin: the fear of now being alone in my quest… close my eyes… concentrate of that feeling inside… feel it in its pure form, but without attaching any explanations, evaluation or guilt towards it… without trying to expel it or grasp it (very important)… just let it be there in all its beauty… the key is not to try and rationalise why it should or should not be there. It already is, accept that wholeheartedly. Sometimes it helps to visualise the feeling rising in a U manner and circulating towards and through the brain.. The mind settles then, within a couple of minutes I felt it dissipate and the state of calm returned. If the feeling comes back later, just do that again.. it does work. And the primary origin (fear) went simply because the mind suddenly responds ‘All is well’. Somehow it evokes trust in that.
Emotions come up for a reason, but they do not have to take reason out, by way of us reacting adversely to them.
This is true meditation ‘on the go’, clean, pure and with great effect. No need to sit on a map:)
SEEK NO VALIDATION
SEEK NO ATTACHMENT
XXXXX
TRUST YOURSELF AND LOVE YOURSELF AND HONOUR YOURSELF
NO-ONE ELSE CAN DO IT BETTER!!!
🙂
Hey Umm,
Attachment is simply an emotional connection, we cannot live without feeling connected to people. What forms the basis for the connection and how it manifests is more important than presence of one..
I am a mother. In a few months time I will let my son go, our 17 years of life together as we both know it – will end… there IS attachment on both sides. There is also the knowing that no matter where and how he will be, or I will be – the attachment is non controlling and everlasting. There is nothing wrong with that kind of attachment.
We want attachments. Just have to establish why and how one is formed… what the heck am I attached to…. To deny those is to deny the nature of own humanity.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/video/2013/feb/16/reeva-steenkamp-video-tribute-video
Love. Exuberance. Play. Affection = Woman.
The purity of women, what I see/feel beneath the skin is so not of this skin-deep world.
I had to hold back tears after watching this.)
do you think she was murdered?
Umm,
She was shot four times, once to the head. Her skull was bashed-in from a bloody cricket bat.. Yes, her life was taken. The connecting association with my message here for years is that MOTIVATIONs concealed within human nature is everything.
I can tell psychically, just just by watching this guy, who he really IS and what his inner reality is like. Through my perception, he’s a volatile cannon, starving of approval and praise, who has intense emotional inner-conflicts that are producing a barrage of lies which are psychotically manifested to us (his audience in seeking that approval).
Just look at his acted tears implying ‘remorse’ in the court room. JUST LOOK AT HIS RESPONSE TO WHAT HAPPENED. He says… that “an intruder” came storming into their house. So his comment MEANS, he is telling us (the international public, and the court) that someone else was ‘motivated’ to crush his girlfriend’s skull-in and finish her off with a bullet to the head.
He is telling the world… THAT HE WAS A HERO…”because he was trying to defend her”.
Now by looking at that video I attached of her natural essence and her sincerity… I ask you to be the judge. Did she deserve that death?
I know an insecure, cowardly sociopath liar–> when I see one. They are everywhere.
I’d like to see how tough and famous this guy really thinks he is when he is at the mercy of a cricket bat swung to the head.)
As I’ve stated for so long, my intolerance for cowardice and abuses of innocence trigger an urge in me for justice.
I don’t care if she was the biggest bitch to him, or if she cheated on him or disrespected him.
A man is not a man when he has absolutely No self-control in life;)
yeh.. it all looks pretty suss from what the papers have printed. i didnt see the video of him crying,just a news pic.but i did read about the cricket bat. see what happens in court.
interesting about the hero comment you made , it would fit in with the whole competitive sports thing he’s had going ( who knows maybe he was in a steroid rage???) .
i could sense his insecurity and inner torment too, by just the look in his eyes. .
and he will have to live with the pain of the loss he created for the rest of his life.
She was a beautiful woman and i could see her inner beauty too.She had grace and humility.. perhaps the very things he felt in himself lacking..
so sad and crazy and cruel and unfair.
yes.. lack of self control. this kind of violence happens all over the world. and not just to humans
She was born August 19, a little Leo. Her face, eyes and nose structure looks like a Pisces or Aries Rising. The rising sign represents the physical features.
Now you know why I suggest films like V for Vendetta and 300.
A woman is not able to physically challenge any male. Nor should she, as a male is supposed to be aware of who he is and what he is capable of.
Women fall in love with little boys like this guy, yet they have no truth of who he really is. If she does know, she tries to change a guy who is inept of changing himself.)
This is why I seethe.
Justice.)
Yes just plain old dishonesty. it IS a killer, whether physically, or emotionally. The sickness of outward projection of ones own fears in the form of seeking attachment and validation through manipulation /jealousy/control/ adulation can only be cured through complete and utter surrender to self loving .and something greater than self.
People only change if they want to change not through someone else changing them
That’s a beautiful understanding.;)
Discernment… the penny dropped.. there is a quip in Russian about Eskimos ‘The Eskimo sings about what he sees’… it is meant to be derogative (to Eskimos) in nature, but it is Discernment in its most simplistic form, isn’t it, Puppy… seeing everything exactly AS IS..
You took it further, from the complexity of your mind towards simplifying ALL, like an Eskimo would BE naturally… If I was ignorant – you HAD to say as you saw (the Truth).. And I saw – judgement. Emotionality is a bad judge (no pun really)… And your childlike Total Ego.. is not the Ego of an adult. A vast difference… I understand, I feel you again now… is that really how you are…
Fuck, I was such a fool, Puppy..
“… but it is Discernment in its most simplistic form, isn’t it, Puppy… seeing everything exactly AS IS..”
I’ve demonstrated “AS IS” right here. That’s all we have if we are truly being the spirit. The present breath. is more/higher/deeper than ego energy. Intellectually debating the present amid a moment or topic is Not being in the present with life and truth;)
If we can’t see the truth, all the opinions till the cows come home won’t matter.
As I’ve shared time and time again. The intellect/ego perception of reality is outward and riddled with oppression and limitation. In that oppression, love is suppressed mythologized. And without the knowing/seeing/feeling of love, we do not EXIST in the presence of truth.
The truth is always among us. Yet not all truth is comforting or pleasing for the ego. That’s it’s beauty.;)
Just watch how utterly “present” that woman is with the Dolphins. That ‘response’ to life and with mother earth is her spirit manifest. Her being is innately like that IN SOCIAL LIFE through her heart WITH PEOPLE. Her truth is that simple. Because she is centered in love beyond her. Truth is light and dark with millions of hues in between.
Our inner life must ‘Know how to See’ truth/love, to appreciate it’s immortality through humanity.
The profound and paradoxical feeling of my views here and in my real life among society each moment in the Now, is hugely PRACTICAL in my day-to-day affairs. It’s incredible to be growing with the Source.
Being spiritual… WORKS. It is powerful and useful and solutions powered in mundane life, IF we are grounded in seeing/knowing from vast inner-experience.
Now in contrast… ‘thinking spiritual’ among people can become mighty distorted through the complexity of human relating in human ego perception and their subsequent TRUE DESIRES. That’s the matrix. Thinking spiritual concepts, as I’ve seen across personal religions/attachments in my life, promotes dogmatic, rigid attitudes which are not supported through self-knowledge and the confounding paradox of life/death experience.
If we are to fill our lives with the presence of God, we must BE EXPERIENCERS WITH the Source through seeking our life meaning.
Versus AN AWARENESS AS COMMENTATORS of the surface/material life circumstances and trivialities.
Those are indeed both relevant for expansive inner-growth.
There is a massive distinction of consciousness between those layers of reality projected among people. Yet they are both very important and relevant for growth and clarity which is again useful to mankind.:)
Puppy.. why can I not make a leap from AWARENESS to BEING? I am that commentator, but I cannot/seem able to speak in the present breath, how is. ‘The sky is blue’. Not ‘The sky is blue, not like it was yesterday, thanks God’… it’s easy and clear, isn’t it… . Then I just FEEL it inside, the whole Truth, but cannot place it in words and BE in the moment with it. Yet, it is inside of me as a feeling. What you wrote – I feel, the depth of this feeling very profound,. Yet here I am… tripping.
It is not about lack of trust now… it is not about being damaged… it is not about not having the heart… it is not about being closed off… it is not about not seeing the intent… nor being blind… what is it, Puppy?
If women are love… why do I have this intense battle going on inside? Why this self sabotage? In moments of deep insight my heart opens and sees clearly, but why does it then shut again? I know I am not like that at the core, yet.. it is a Pendulum.. I used to write a diary from age 7 to 16. At ten I wrote a poem about the glory of life and my love of it, yet I was also asking some serious questions, so it is not just life itself that did it. It is who I am. My inner voice is telling me to ACCEPT this part of me, as an evolutionary starting point, accept all in its Wholeness, so that I could go forward from here. I don’t know how… I am sure you can relate to that from all you have written. Believe me I had that mental baseball bat in me on many occasions. Since my Piscean Sun completely abhors violence of any kind.. I don’t do it physically, instead it turns inward psychological violence, onto self. How does one accept those dark undercurrents of own psyche?
I have a very deep awareness and understanding right now, but not yet BEING. I know that. My soul tells me when there is a lie, that feeling of inner discontent pointing out to where the problem is… Practically… I had a problem sale on Ebay recently (am getting rid of everything I don’t want/need in my life now), I had to sit down and feel the innards… for how to deal with that. The moment the right (fair and just) solution presented itself, I felt at peace. It was accepted and is resolved now. I know it works, yes.
My 7th House Sun is seeking change through relational experiences with others. You see.. in real life no one challenges my highly Plutonic first House, nobody dares:( You happened to be that ‘other’ who did.
Puppy.. I abused you, your willingness to share all that you learned from your own battles and inner growth and change.. Please forgive me if you can.
I used to be very close to a Scorpio Sun girl (22nd of November, like Pistorius, he could be a Sagittarius, but I feel him as Scorpio, and yes, he did it). Both lower selves, we destroyed each other. She was very violent with her Gemini husband and used to smash things around the house, how many times they had to replace the TV… I couldn’t understand that violent drive at the time, and her husband told me ‘You are too earnest. Stop biting the bait every time’ god.. I did absorb it.. this was an experience I will never forget. She tried to commit suicide a few times years after we parted ways… I swore to stay away from Scorpios and did for years, because I didn’t want any drama like that again. The only person who completely changed my perception of Scorpio Suns was the Eagle I know in life… and now you.
I want to tell you that the last 16 months were the darkest and the most amazing in my life.
I need to stay away from here for a while.
And the thing that is sad and bizarre for me is that he( my ex) was also born on the 22nd Nov .. .
you know the feeling when you are sitting there and you get a shiver/shake, they say’ ” someone is walking over you grave”.
that combined with a very strong deja vu.something like how i feel.
typo- “your grave”
what an amazing creature…
hammer-2.jpg
http://www.google.com.au/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=hammerhead+shark&source=images&cd=&docid=4AWAuZRGe-COGM&tbnid=xW8eoLCDh4_twM:&ved=0CAUQjRw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fbloggieseuropa.wordpress.com%2F2012%2F05%2F04%2Fthe-hammerhead-shark%2F&ei=4RckUdveM-6ZmQXA_oD4CQ&bvm=bv.42661473,d.dGY&psig=AFQjCNE7XhGq0DmNYx2VKpS2wdZ2krSNig&ust=1361406287100739
http://www.google.com.au/imgres?q=hammerhead+shark&hl=en&sa=X&biw=1268&bih=618&tbm=isch&tbnid=WCCt7YR27dmdYM:&imgrefurl=http://library.thinkquest.org/08aug/01316/Hammerhead%2520Shark.html&docid=UkDAA0wVudVmgM&imgurl=http://library.thinkquest.org/08aug/01316/Images/01.jpg&w=460&h=296&ei=rBgkUb2YJu-NmQWQxIDgAw&zoom=1&ved=1t:3588,i:151&iact=rc&dur=871&sig=103310719094356465366&page=1&tbnh=177&tbnw=280&start=0&ndsp=12&tx=177&ty=78
Of all the things that I have read by now, this one probably resonated with me the most. When I read the first few posts I began to cry because it is how I understand the spiritual awakening, and I recognised many things that
happened and are happening to me now. It covers just about everything one can possibly encounter in all stages of beginning to awaken, reaching it and further change and growth. It is the Truth as and how was spoken here, too. Written sensitively, but without ‘softly’ ‘softly’ approach by someone who walked it and is walking it. He never says his is the right way, he urges us to find our own, from the space of true awareness. Spiritual path takes us to the most painful states of being, I know that because this pent up energy can be very debilitating, especially at the very beginning, and very physical. But Spirituality itself is not about pain at all, and the only reason why it happens is all the garbage that we accumulated throughout our lives. Ultimately, spiritual is our own way, finding the inner voice and addressing the issues within, healing them and incorporating ALL into every moment of walking this Earth, the living Spirit of who we are. Spirituality is very ‘down to Earth’, in fact. And it starts with letting go of EVERYTHING. Not giving up. Letting go of illusion of control and expectation.
I wanted to share it here because I am not good at describing things myself, but the FEEL of it and the flow of it is now ever present within. I am grateful there are people who selflessly share all that they learned from it and keep on learning. It never ends.
I hope it will be of help to those who read this on this forum and maybe have questions. I know it is helping me enormously.
And Puppy… six years do make a difference. If you were to meet yourself as you are now – eight years ago… you would not have understood even your own language as is now. Neither did I at the beginning. If I were to meet myself as I am now – three years ago – I would have told myself I am crazy. And that’s the Truth:)
http://www.spiritualawakeningprocess.com/2013/01/controlling-uncontrollable.html
I was a fool to believe that the awakening will start from a sort of a Big Bang.. Happens to some, but without intelligent awareness it is lost on the person, as it was lost on me years back.. There is a lot of ‘foreplay’ leading there.. Every little cognitive shift resulted in deep pain when trying to step between the two worlds, holding on to the old one, and yearning for the new.. This is when the abyss becomes real, dredging up all from the bottom, things appear from what has been long forgotten, a meeting with the ghosts, can’t help it, just happens, intrudes and asks to look at it… and you reach a point where death feels welcoming and you want to lie down and die… you reach a point when all within just screams ‘Enough, leave me alone!’… and then.. you give up the fight, everything just dissolves, and one is left with the void. The Void is not too bad, a place of creation from Nothingness. I thought it will be a joyous experience, but not yet, no, the Big Bang can wait. The Ego (our old perceptions, habits, ways of seeing and interacting) does not die instantly in most of us, the energy drain is MASSIVE, leaves one exhausted and weak and dysfunctional.
The thing that happens in the Void.. letting go of things I do not want to let go of.. If not – my soul will despair, and the cycle of pain will continue, back to the Abyss, caught in the Nether land of Limbo. There is NOTHING easy in this, but I did want it, for a long time now, I wanted to go as far as.. didn’t know just HOW FAR that will turn out to be.. So here it is, the Choice. This is where one has to be gentle and loving towards self, slowly taking the ownership of the Soul, the trusting of self, the listening.. The thing is… one cannot go back at this point, there is no misery, just so so tired..
Somebody died. He was 89, a Scorpio. I’ve known him for 12 years… I went to see his widow.. It hits home like nothing else.. all is interconnected, from a virus to distant galaxies. We are interconnected, every moment has a meaning, how life is lived is how death will be, not its physical parameters, but the state of the soul in which we meet it… Life is prescious and not ‘good’ or ‘bad’.. it IS… lived from love, it makes the meeting with eternity – peace. There are NO second chances, and this is not a rehearsal… Fears exist, but they are imaginary conjunctions of the mind, looked upon from a limited mortality.. NOTHING can bring us to the truth of us, but love… of life, of self, of others… no resistence, but a will to LIVE and BE in every moment..
His ashes are in the rose bush…
There is a song from a 1970’s Russian movie… only now I know the meaning…
youtube.com/watch?v=QfZPX442VMI
All is mirage
in this ravaging world
There is only the blink,
Hold on to that.
There is only the jolt
between the past and the future,
that’s called Life
**
Eternal calm will hardly
make the heart glad,
eternal calm is for greying pyramids,
And for the star breaking off and falling
there is only the jolt,
the blinding blink.
**
So let this world
fall forward through centuries,
not always I am that same path with it.
what do I treasure
what do I risk in this world –
is the jolt,
only that blink.
I was just checking so see any news on the pistorious case and i found this article…
“Narcissistic Sociopath’s single-handedly destroy their lives through paranoia and jealousy. As more and more news is being leaked to the press, it seems Oscar Pistorius is no better than the common douche bags across the globe (like the boy in my story) who abuse and lash out at their partners. An olympic athlete jealous of his girlfriend’s relationship with a rugby player? Sure. Believe it. Having close friends outside the “romance” is just the thing that sets off these cowards. But it’s going to be a tough nugget for many supporters to swallow, since Pistorius happens to have a couple of medals to flash in front of our eyes in hopes of blinding us to his true nature.
Narcissistic sociopaths can’t leave well enough alone and believe the people in their lives when they tell them they are “just friends” with someone. Why? Because a narcissistic sociopath can’t trust himself. How is he expected to trust anyone else?
Sociopaths are the Kings and Queens of self-fulfilling prophecies: their biggest fears become reality quickly. Sociopaths suspect the worst and repeatedly accuse their intimate partners and spouses of acting in despicable ways.
“You whore! I know you’re sleeping with X, Y, and Z when I’m not around. Why else would you be friends with such losers who have nothing to offer you?”
Over time and worn down by the increasing delusions of the sociopath, these partners finally just give up and relent. It’s too tiresome, otherwise, to continue our attempts at defending ourselves and our intentions. We allow the sociopath to think what he wants to think. Unfortunately, as soon as we think we have disengaged, the real fight for our lives and spirits begins.
I think many of us who have experienced similar can imagine the nightmare that was Reeva Steenkamp’s last moments. The rage, the anger, the begging, and the pleading. Even if Oscar Pestorius is never diagnosed with having a pathological personality disorder, he behaved as if his dark side was met with little to no resistance by the “idol” so many had cheered to victory in the past. Such a shame.
As I have noted in the past, a narcissistic sociopath can take the most innocent of behaviors (like being friends with someone) and twist it into something dark, dirty, and shameful. Being a good person and having good and loving friends and family is the narcissistic sociopath’s biggest enemy and source of rage and disgust. As soon as the green-eyed monster of jealousy rears its ugly head, kick these fools to the curb. Who cares if he/she happens to be a well-respected athlete or business owner? They’re pieces of trash capable of murdering you. If you think that’s harsh, lucky you. You’ve never looked evil in the eye.”
The story would have ended differently, if she took out her 22 in her cute little purse and shot him in personal defense ….I understand he had less extreme anatomy? It might have to be a fatal shot.
The consequences of a woman defending herself, are even more serious than her actually being murdered.
how crazy is that??
if you are going to allow guns at least make it fair.
too many guns in the world its out of control
yeh she wouldve probably not even been given a fair trial.”.she shot a hero! how will i know which pair of nikes to buy then??”
Im not really one for labels.. I think they are used to readily as easily in this society.. the classic one of ADHD as an example.Its a great reason for the pharmaceutical companies to maintain their billion dollar incomes.
Having said that, I see the above post in terms of intense fear that has snowballed . Fear of loss of self, of loss of control of self and fear of loss of another.Fear of expressing this fear for fear of being ridiculed , controlled, patronised, abandoned,mocked.Fear of expressing fear as a belief that expressed fear leads to dissolution of self.coupled with an inability to be rid of the fear( through lack of self love) which in then becomes frustration at self for not being able to be rid of it and angry, ashamed and confused at self for having it in the first place.questions begin in self’s mind of why but without self love it is directed outwards to reasons explained by upbringing and worldly issues.This starts to become intense as the search for meaning and answers become more focussed and intense( again no self love involved).feelings of being caged, being unable to express this ever-growing snowball of emotion and seeing relevance and similarities with non truths in outer life as justification for inability to be truthful.. it metamorphs into a battle for truth within the mind as the boundary between self , and partner begin to dissolve( fear escalating).. by this point firmly associating partner with non truths and then using this as a reason to affirm anger and senses of injustice and betrayal.. it starts to explode in the form of trying to save self from complete dissolution, in the form of accusations and questions that form no real relevance to the person it is directed to but done in an insinuating and provocative manner so as to induce antagonism in order to set self free from the intense feelings of enmeshment and dissolution.
‘Knowing thyself’ is not of any intrinsic value to (socially) parasitic cowards.
They feed off the life spirit and happiness of others. Again, it’s a warped approval thing so deeply cavernous you can’t imagine. He is just one more example of how males are trapped by the dark psychosis of their desirous (and fictional) projections in the outside world. The illusion and belief of that world.
He is simply a walking myth who acted on his mythical fear.
Those self-mythologized humans are nothing unusual as seen through the lens of these intense eyes.
The system will probably grant him bail, thanks to the POLITICAL persuasion and BELIEF of that specific collective myth. (i.e…he’s believed a hero through many)
Truth is so precious and valuable to the soul, people don’t/can’t see it;)
I like how you said- “he is simply a walking myth who acted on his mythical fear”
..yes so true. It never ceases to astound me how many people in this world dont see this truth.. it is this crazy- and it IS madness , how about THAT being a recognised medical illness… that people are so unaware to see the lunacy happening, yes the ” hero” thing- what is so heroic about athletes sponsors- big name manufacturers such as NIKE whose employees work in abusive sweatshops?
Up to 50% of workers that they employ have restricted access to toilets and drinking water through the day.In more than half of its factories employees work more than 60 hours a week and many are punished if they dont work overtime. Wages are also predominately lower than the legal minimum.
What is heroic about that?
There are choices, and there is always a bigger picture.
I don’t know what is happening right now, and what I have been sending out there in the past three months, but there is SO MUCH LOVE coming my way, and I do not know how to deal with that… the people in my life, some new and some old, true blue friends… just knocking on my door, literally and figuratively… I cry and laugh and FEEL through every little gesture… is that how it is? Is that what comes back when it is given from the deep deep essence? I never loved or respected myself, or thought I have anything of value to give to others.. afraid of my own depth and afraid to be Love… and it is happening, and it is humbling and so not what I am used to… My demons are not to be denied their place in personal history, I respect them. They have lessons to teach me, but by God… Pisces.. the expressed Light, and it is true, IT COMES BACK!! All that totally overturned in me – has found a voice and an action, and people can see it? Every Fish lives with the inner dichotomy, unaware and unable to break through the call of the Subconscious, the Neptune energy.. and then a miracle takes place, entering Clarity of the Higher Mind, and there is so much UNITY there… Letting go to let things unfold naturally…
No, I do not need attachments, anyone wanting to own me – paid the price in the past… I want soulful connections. Some people briefly enter our lives to teach us lessons, some enter, leave and then re-enter again, the relationships grow and evolve from there, forging the connection through fire, burn the soul and leave a mark to last a lifetime… and nothing can break this kind of bond. NOTHING. this kind of soul love is harder than hardship, and more pure than a spring.. Tell them you love them, nurture their souls, do not hold back, share yourself and all you have with them, life is short, everything is impermanent, they may not be here tomorrow, and you WILL feel the loss… Be prepared for that, but love them for who they are. They are in your life for a reason. It is through my experiences with people that I learn something about myself every day, and appreciate who I am, those gifts that we all carry within, often unacknowledged by us, until the day comes when all is stripped down to bare basics, and you KNOW… And leave those who hold you back.sometimes we have to leave in order to grow and carry on evolving into the beautiful beings we are. We let others be and carry on with our path.
I AM. And life just IS, in all its messiness and hardship and unfairness… and beauty.. it is really very very simple in its complexity. And when lived from the Voice, the Source of my inner happiness – it is still hard, and the life battles will always be there, but it will feel different. It will feel true.
Someone gave me a Buddha pendant and said “You are the rock, to me and to others, and you don’t even know it”.. I need time to adjust to all this. I didn’t know, I simply didn’t know.
Intense today. I checked – Scorpio Moon again.. and most planets now in Pisces. Strong stuff… how sensitive we can be to those planetary movements, without even realizing that.
A rose is a rose… it has beautiful petals, and it has the thorns.. and we do not admire the graceful beauty of the rose bud and get mad at the rose when it prickles, wishing the thorns were not there. We love the rose as the WHOLE.. The rose is… this is what humans are.. each one of us. Accepting that (including in ourselves) is half the battle won.
There are MANY voids resulting from the rupture of every issue and hurt.. it’s like wherever one brick falls out bringing release and lightness… this crazy Mind rests for a bit and then rushes in to construct a new brick and
fit it into the opening.. Puppy, I have finally found an answer to the question which has been arising in me since way back.. via my own battles… does detachment in a spiritual realm mean a person stops feeling and remains
always composed and serene? I had this crazy idea that this is what happens, phew!!! NO. OK, OK, sounds naive I know… Difficult feelings do and will arise. Being spiritual does not set us free from being human. Their
integration into us (our Oneness) takes place from the objectivity of seeing what arose… for me personally it means something very simple… PAUSING. Pausing after the wave came in, feeling it, peering into it..taking a few mental steps back.. ALLOWING what is.. THAT sets it at rest.
Anyone who believes that a spiritual path is a walk in the meadow leading to everlasting bliss – will have another thing coming…
which made me think of all those souls born right now… 6 Pisces, 2 Scorpios…. wow… add the Ascendant for some and what will they become…
“…does detachment in a spiritual realm mean a person stops feeling and remains always composed and serene?…”
The warrior path is not “always serene”.
How many times do you need to ask me that?
Sure, a life of not facing ones fears and accumulating to survive would be serene. Does their serenity encapsulate extreme experiences cultivating psycho-sexual- emotional growth?
This is not to say that mortal perception of reality is not serene. Most unconscious humans are indeed ‘serene’ all their lives (again safety in mind) as that word serenity in my world has layers and layers of meaning. If a warrior was serene by his nature, he would see nothing to grow into, or to become, past his survival instincts.
If the mother nature on this earth was serene sans fury and devastation and loss, who’s reality is seeing the truth?… 1) the mortal who ‘believes’ life is/should be always peace and love (serenity) everywhere among us… or 2) the spiritual being who can acknowledge the truth of what mother nature is?… therefore the acknowledgment of what man IS through his desires, on earth?
I’ve answered you through my statements over so long so many times you can’t connect the dots.;)
It’s a process of having entered, Puppy… Notice I didn’t ASK you, I shared the answer which I found for myself. How? Because it hasn’t come from your story or others’. Anyone can share, and it’s great to know, but it was and is YOUR experience, it has not been mine up to now. It’s the difference between watching someone riding a horse (reading what you and others say) and actually riding it yourself (CONSCIOUSLY working with it, objectively and in detachment). You see… I had a bit of a fight on my hands today when all that took place here attempted to hammer me down, and the little girl wanted to feel ‘hurt’ and ‘small’ and ‘rejected’ and… you get the picture:) It arises spontaneously and without warning. I didn’t let her. The fight was very conscious and hard, involved tears, a hot bath, candles, meditating and a walk… but hey… I SAW and KNEW what was going on. My soul has rejoiced in that realization aaaand… ‘made good’. Controlling the energy that intense and actually TAMING it, from the thoughts along the baseball bat variety towards inner calm….. I will give myself a gold star for that:)
As you said before… COMMENTATING versus EXPERIENCING. I crossed the threshold now into not only the depth, but the real taste of it. But you also said both are important. Without my intense search, reading loads (you started with that too), arguing with you, talking to people – I wouldn’t have arrived at this point, Sir.
You are right there… ignorance keeps people safe and cozy (serene), as you said ‘nothing to grow into’. Also… this kind of ‘serenity’ makes one kind of ‘fearless’, not in a true sense…. In my previous life(s) I was so ignorant (or naive) that I was able to go places without fear… because I didn’t see (acknowledge consciously) the destructive nature of this life… so you enter blindfold, no discernment, no ability to see, but own desires… mine were always relating to people, not anything tangible. Which, of course, is the worst kind of attachment one can have, because to truly love people – we have to let them be… ‘things’ can be obtained, people – cannot…. Life kills weakness (inability to learn from its lessons). Those who do not learn – will go through the karmic cycle of pain again and again.
I unconsciously denied my own pain, my own bad experiences… all is being reworked now… Neptune does want peace.. but not at the cost of the truth, once it has been seen. We are BOTH, Pain and Joy in equal measure, the unity in this life existence… sometimes it feels like death..
Those are ‘growing pains’, every aspect of my life is having a light torch put to it. Whether I will invite pain from new experiences (not the old ones, including you, those need to heal) – is up to me from there on. There is a choice to feel, yet not get drowned in it.. I SEE all as is now.
There. Connecting the dots through MY experiencing, not yours. It may feel like inventing a bicycle to you:)
Nature is nature….this is a harsh fact. Nature has to be helped.
There is merit and validity in this video. Observe this. The ideas and principles stem from standard psych text books, which may help people see a broader reality beyond themselves. Tony Robbins is a man with vast life experiences, so I perceive his mind-reality of finding the cause of suffering, healing, expansion and transformation truly credible.
Take an hour of your time and really soak in the meanings of his comments and relating ability with a woman live in the audience. I can see why he gets results and why he gets paid highly for his wisdom and presence.
He is Pisces.
Can you post the link without http://www... there are many videos come up with ‘Starting Over Tony Robbins’, which one is it that you posted?
youtube.com/watch?v=LTquXVZL8gM
I watched it. I prefer your method:) Honestly, he wouldn’t work for me… because there is no element of going really deep inside oneself… and FINDING the answers for MYSELF. I need to FEEL every motion to GET IT, through own search and experience, not anyone putting THEIR evaluations and their thoughts into my head and heart and soul. My path personally is that of my own psychologist, soul healer and soul developer. I need to OWN that process in its entirety, from start to finish….
Having said that… for those souls who never asked themselves any of the deep questions about the personal dynamics and own inner life… it might trigger something.
In fact, Puppy.. I gave your approach ( yes, I know it is the expression of who you are, but so is his) a name… ‘Walk with the Shadow’. It WORKS on much MUCH deeper levels which I appreciated more than you know.
Patent it:)
‘Starting Over Anthony Robbins’.;)
The video loads on my laptop as I have 10GB WiFi.
The video may not work here…it’s titled ‘Starting Over’ on Youtube.
Three spheres of life:
1. Our Self
2. Our Work
3. Our Relationships
Six primary human needs:
1. Certainty
2. Variety
3. Significance
4. Connection & Love
5. Growth
6. Contribution
Each of these six primary needs are indeed true ‘motivations’ which exist in us…so Understanding how these spheres and human needs are buried within our subconscious pain and suffering, enables us to perceive a different, larger, richer model of the world and our life.
So all relationship pain and confusion happens because?…
As he said– Women speak in riddles. And men don’t ‘get it’ because they are logical, linear about troubles or conflict in relating.
So in essence bunnies speak in riddles because their ‘motive’ is to grow with a conscious man, and not have to ‘train him’. So the male does not realize he needs to become Sherlock Holmes, a detective to solve her riddles.
Men are then gradually emasculated through perceiving a woman’s constant feelings and control said in her riddle, by INTERPRETING her drama…as logical and literal.
As we have seen here as an example of relationships on the forum little darlings, women are not literal.
That’s their beauty to me. That’s how women love.
I haven’t watched the video yet…
“their ‘motive’ is to grow with a conscious man, and not have to ‘train him’”
The paradoxical thing is… women are much more fluid and open to change. In my observation of men in my life who stayed for a length of time, and those of other women… men resist psychological exploration and transformation. Their eyes are firmly focused on the Outer World, when difficulties arise they look for solutions out there, not within. I noticed the difference in my counselling training. Men want an instant solution, afraid to even consider the possibility of their own Mind and soul as being the Source of whatever troubles them. They say ‘I just want it fixed’.. women constantly listen in to themselves, the best they understand in their level of evolution – they still do… I feel that is perhaps why it’s mostly women who initiate a divorce.. they simply outgrow their men. All the guys I’ve known for a long time – are still how I found them years back.
Scorpio men, being in touch with their feminine side – understand that psychic energy… this is a gift… to touch the invisible.
“Men want an instant solution, afraid to even consider the possibility of their own Mind and soul as being the Source of whatever troubles them..”
That’s because as Robbins said…. men are physiologically wired differently than women. Men want feelings (drama, sorrow, pain) to manifest as logical solutions. Women don’t know what they want. Remember my input from the movie ‘The Notebook’?. Women always say things they don’t mean. Always. Men say what they mean. Their logical orientation is to see relationship problems as they see work problems of financial problems. Men do what’s unfeeling through their limited logic. They cut-out any “issues” and move forward mentally. Women don’t move forward mentally because she knows the guy does not understand her’. But she does not know what she (her feelings) wants. Women ‘subconsciously want’ to draw males into their swirling waters of feminine confusion, frustration and sorrow, as Robbins says.. “to make him understand!”
That’s the disconnect.
Men use their logical and rationalizing ability to try to make women “happy”. So as you’ve said in your post, women are fluid and receptive and willing to look inward whereas males won’t. That’s because male and female or masculine and feminine mind-heart-energy in many males is way off balance. Males don’t like to show sensitivity or they simply incapable of sensitivity. Therefore males ego’s blind them of GIVING LOVE beyond them-self. Their self-created myth of themselves.
So the logical ‘responses’ in males is not functioning through higher/aware levels of a soulful self-knowledge, and a love greater than their logically perceived solutions to make women happy in the intangible sense of things. Male personality/ego levels are utterly disconnected from showing their Yin or feminine energies to a woman, if he cannot trust, Trust of himself and trust of handling the world around him.
Relationship disease always boils down to deep Trust issues. Simultaneously distrust of ‘Self’ and of ‘Relating’. = Two spheres not grown/cultivated as noted because of a huge lack of a greater model of the world.
Most couples fall out of love because trust has diminished through their private and subjective illusions. In there they’re feeling out-of-control = Afraid. In that suffering… both sexes are afraid and very limited as ‘a Self’ and as a channel of love and light through their ‘Relationships’ through the world/life in general.
Self-Knowledge/consciousness is the atom bomb. It is the Center of transcendence to become our greatest potential.
Being stuck in vicarious personality views of the world is the antithesis of knowing thy self.
Just watch closely at what people do as a result of their suffering.;)
you have a good understanding there pup 😉
“Never, never be afraid to do what’s right, especially if the well-being of a person or animal is at stake. Society’s punishments are small compared to the wounds we inflict on our soul when we look the other way.”
― Martin Luther King, Jr.
It’s amazing how my subconscious wisdom is now getting a new lease of life… remember I said a long time ago how I felt a man, a father and a child in you? Don’t worry, it’s not about you… the point is we perceive different facets of another’s being during communication, it’s fluid, ever changing, and the truth should be born in every word and sentence exchanged… the Truth of how they are at that moment in time… which then leads us to WHO they are in the long term. The catch is… if the conflict arises.. we then create in our head an image of the person, NOT who they are AT THAT MOMENT OF COMMUNICATING, but our perception of them… and hold on to it, so anything said is received through the prism of that initially distorted image. It becomes a blindfold… we project this ‘understanding’ onto another, the immediacy of communicating is lost completely somewhere there..
During the conflict people form their painful feelings, when the conflict subsides – they still REMEMBER those, hold on to them.. which keeps the blindfold intact. The pain ‘goes south’ and deep within, gets stored… any similar situation with anyone else will trigger it and will evoke the same response – projection. People live their entire lives in this cycle… Release!!
The point is… truth of another person is NEVER fixed (aside from their deeper values and principles if they have those). We are far too complex for that.. so back to the beginning.. we are many many states, conflicting, amusing, irritating, charming, humourous, miserable.. I may like someone, but may not like what they are saying AT THAT MOMENT IN TIME, if it doesn’t agree with my inner being. I may also dislike someone quite a bit, yet there may be something they did or said which agrees with me, I had that with people. Receptivity is being open to the integrity of this Flow. Then – we do not create ‘the Hurt’. We simply see as is.
I am happy to connect the dots… through experience, not theory:)
I really appreciate your beautiful understanding…
In women, too, the male/female energies are off balance. I admire you for this equilibrium you hold within (that completion/manifestation of all 12 psychological functions we hold within), but most people lack that through cultivating those energies which come naturally (easier) to them, and ignoring that which is lacking.. for me personally it is, always has been – lack of masculine. Yes, I know you said I am all Man, but that is just the learned, artificially acquired mode of relating. The current industrialized societies/cultures have not been kind to women in that way… logical Mind, through the new religion of science became the Ruler and Oppressor of the World.. and we learned how to speak it.
To know thyself means to fully understand own needs/wants OUTSIDE OF any relationship first… learn how to fulfill those independently. A relationship becomes its own entity, a vessel that SUPPORTS those two in their individual needs. We want to be truly ourselves within a relationship. Gosh, the freedom of this when there is no pressure to ‘conform’ to any construed image held of us by another… which again comes down to learning who another is from the core.. and which most people do not take the time to learn.
Relationship failure is a communication issue in many instances, not a lack of love. Robbins said elsewhere, we have to learn to communicate from another’s metaprogram (basically, another’s world view). I feel this is… a lie. It’s like looking at the duck and thinking ‘I know I am not a duck, but I will have to talk the duck language now’. Only good if you want to sell something to someone. Perhaps, the solution is to really know what you want, and why you want it (so you HAVE to know and trust yourself really well), and then just express it as is.
Now imagine this… all women suddenly learn to say what they mean… How would that make a man feel/be? Would it remove the magic of our primeval psychological differences, the enigma of the opposite sex?
“..Robbins said elsewhere, we have to learn to communicate from another’s metaprogram (basically, another’s world view). I feel this is… a lie…”
He’s right through my synthesized experiences. It’s a question of ‘how’ you interpret what he means.
His message is for both parties to learn and grow through an open experience. A direct and truthful experience. Finding a higher truth in any encounter with people means we are conscious of higher truths beyond our intellect. Ines, even Tony Robbins knows the journey of seeing truth is infinite. If he were to believe he was too enlightened for certain people, he would not be doing what he loves. Get it?
I interpret he means we humans are to grow in mind-heart-soul-body through true empathy for humanity/family in our everyday life. That means to be Relating with their manifested experience as it truly IS/EXISTS for them. This does not mean we betray our sense of self through an interchange, or we unconsciously mimic and diffuse our independent center because of changes happening in the outside environment. As I’ve shared before… learning to see the outer world inwardly, yet fluidly, is the independence of-self needed for spiritual growth. Wholeness to us then, among the complexity of humanity becomes real and refined only during an ongoing, loving/discerning relationship with the-Self. His statement means, one must always adapt to changing socioeconomic environments, and not vicariously lie/lose to themselves while interpreting the outer through their inward processes.
“… A relationship becomes its own entity, a vessel that SUPPORTS those two in their individual needs. We want to be truly ourselves within a relationship. Gosh, the freedom of this when there is no pressure to ‘conform’ to any construed image held of us by another…”
Yes that principle has been my passion and my intention since day one. People have blasted me for wanting that… Calling me “intolerant” and “arrogant” etc… so now you get an impression of what it’s like to be me among humans.
“..Now imagine this… all women suddenly learn to say what they mean… How would that make a man feel/be?..”
Hahaha… the social world would be an extremely insipid place if women always meant what they said. We’d have women tasking like wild ants and ordering others to get tangible needs met by the minute. There would be No Love. Imagine that… No love… because women would not be the driving sexual force which makes men weak, yes makes men do stupid things and inspirational things in the tangible world.
Next time you ladies go shopping, just be aware of all the goodies you’re connecting with in the window. All that stuff is– Venusian. Life would be a living hell for me personally if there were no women to soak into my lungs and drink with my heart. My soul would yearn and vanish from the emptiness of their divine essence. I wouldn’t last a day if there was no bunny energy to keep me young in spirit. Their mystery/power keeps me longing.
To summarize something really important which Robbins and I understand…
…Is that every person on earth has their own model of the world. Their own rules and values created or adopted shaping ‘how’ their world ‘should’ be inside them. So that means every persons model, or ‘frame of Seeing’ their life is different… to WHAT the outside world actually IS. (meaning the matrix of behaviors from people in their desires through the world).
He and I can see/understand that the human psyche, the perceptions we conceptualize through life from the womb, of the world— IS THE WORLD which we truly inhabit .
In others words… our TRUE reality, is each persons INNER model of the model we choose to inhabit… which IS MOSTLY NOT COMPARABLE to how life was expected in the outer world doing what is does.
It’s a mystical Pisces thing;)
YES!!! There is so much suffering from trying to reconcile not only our internal model with the Outer world, but also… our model of another person – to who they actually are… that’s when the two collide and bring havoc, people feel loss of ‘control’ when all they have lost really is own misconceived belief.. Just think how much of this I unleashed upon myself when attempting to fit you in my little perceptive reality.
Acceptance… of how everything truly is, a space of ALLOWING what is. Then the truth evolves and grows within us, and we can find our place in this world, instead of constantly wanting to shape it to fit – US (our expectations of what it should be like)… many people get crushed by this unwillingness to accept, let go of the little cardboard box of the Universe in their minds. I can honestly tell you I had to fight myself tooth and nail to release that.. and it is an ongoing process, always.
I wish I could have your gift of expression, argh.. I have a million and one flashes traversing me.. and no words:)
Hahaha… how un-killer of me.
No love… *shudder*
Open communication.. it means different things to men and women. Maybe, for women it is to learn to speak from an open heart. Maybe it is for men to learn to speak from an open mind. OPEN is the key, not the mode of our
expression. Openness helps people to connect beyond their immediate egotistic drives.. We ARE different, but we complement each other beautifully, if only people could SEE and FEEL that, men and women need to stop trying to gain an upper hand over each other and just… CHERISH. Cherish who we are, openly and without fear of being ‘taken advantage’ of..
It saddens me to see that idea of ‘equality’ of sexes being peddled as THEIR SAMENESS. I have an ongoing conversation with my son who simply fails to see that equality is based on accepting and recognising the basic
DIFFERENCES between sexes. This is what was drummed into him in this educational system. This is what produces macho girls and emasculated boys.. This is the vehicle of oppression and abuse out there.. You know… the old idea of gender separated schools always appealed to me. It focuses the Mind on the task (learning), removes the temptations of the flesh (at least their immediate manifestation) AND breeds RESPECT for the mystery of another gender. I may be very naive but there has to be a sense of AWE permeating our interactions with one another. Joy of the discovery.
“That means to be Relating with their manifested experience as it truly IS/EXISTS for them.”
Yes. I expressed that once as ‘walking in their shoes’, meaning… we get to see the world with their eyes. But it doesn’t mean we need to speak their language. I really find it hard now… What happens is people either get really
drawn to me, or think I am crazy.
I was just observing a dog playing with the ball. It’s beautiful to see the naturalness of its being. So flowing and so free.
It makes me laugh really… In the past I would want to go into every little detail of your expression and to ‘discuss’ every little point… No need. I completely understand what you are saying, and that’s enough.
“So that means every persons model, or ‘frame of Seeing’ their life is different… to WHAT the outside world actually IS.”
A king, disenchanted with his subjects’ dishonesty, decided to force them to tell the truth. When the city gates were opened one morning, gallows had been erected in front of them. A captain of the royal guard stood by. A herald announced, “Whoever will enter the city must first answer a question which will be put to them by the captain of the guard.”
Mullah Nasrudin, who had been waiting outside the gates of the city, stepped forward first. The captain spoke: “Where are you going? Tell the truth … the alternative is death by hanging.” “I am going,” said Nasrudin, “to be hanged on those gallows.”
“I don’t believe you!” replied the guard.
Nasrudin calmly replied, “Very well then. If I have told a lie, hang me!”
“But that would make it the truth!” said the confused guard.
“Exactly,” said Nasrudin, “your truth.”
…. somewhere between those worlds we negotiate the truth of the moment, BUT when we have a ‘well defined’ idea of what the truth is – it will drive the Mind into so much confusion. As you said ,black, white and a thousand hues in between’… this is a very Piscean concept. Yet, the Truth is not a shapeless blob in the stance we take towards it. And this is a very Scorpio concept…
You know how we sometimes watch the same movie a few times and every time discover layers upon layers of an old meaning? This is the depth. In a few months my layers will have changed, and new ones will be added.. Comes in waves, showers with a thousand of insights, leaves one for dead, respite and integration come, then on up and forward to the next one, Whee!! People really really do not know HOW to have that discerning relationship with Self.
I feel I’ve now known the true War, not a messy squabble with Self.
Puppy… I couldn’t do it without you, literally and metaphorically. You are the live wire that sparks. Thank you for the love, truly.
The SIMPLICITY of it all is astounding.
Puppy, I want to ask you something… Eckhart Tolle.. I read his book ‘The Power of Now’ during my cycling around France… picked it up in a second hand bookshop just from reading a passage, knew nothing about him before.
I watched his videos, free on his website.. he had this overnight spontaneous awakening at 29 after years of suicidal depression. Now, to me he absolutely represents that dog.. there is no artifice, no pretense, no showmanship like Anthony Robbins, no any sense of Self, no desire to bestow his message on anyone. I feel him as PURE in totality of his essence. That dog who just IS, the pure, undiluted BEING.. From just observing him, I have absolutely no doubt that he truly went through the transformation from the inside, not via the intellectual push to gain more awareness, not via purposefully thriving to ‘get there’… Anthony Robbins still felt… too much of a ‘guru’, in a sense that he HAS A MISSION, and I also felt him manipulative if you don’t mind me saying that. This does not devalue his message… but I guess I just go by my internal feel here.. In essence.. there is a massive difference between being AWARE, and BEING. It does not compare, and that’s the difference, to me, between the two. One is aware. Another just IS… What do you feel?
The most bizarre thing is.. Despite my four Fishes… I mostly don’t gel with Pisceans, even though I plug into their core for sure…
..” and I also felt him manipulative if you don’t mind me saying that..”
The entire world is manipulative. Look around you. Get over it. {AS IS}.
Eckhart Tolle manipulates. How do you think he ‘sells’ his work?
Yes E.T is a quiet man. But I know if I were eating lunch with him he would not fascinate me. I’ve heard his message. I respect his path. But he knows very little about women, in my view. Women are the lifeblood for men, potent men. I look at his awakenings, from what I see through his being, and they are not transformations manifested from the sheer ferocity/intensity of his sexuality, like that of myself and Robbins. Is he a magnetic influence?…No… not through the eyes of a little carrot-eatin’ bunny.
If his personality (filter of expression) had an amp boost, he might just touch more lives. My personality is high wattage, and obviously so is Robbins. Charisma does not hurt in the realm of women. But we have to really know our stuff to have that gift penetrating people in the first place. E.T has gifts which are more PG rated.
Sexual intensity… is powerful, like a brewing volcano. It has effect. It has tremors of intimidation (not intentional social intimidation). Most importantly, sexual potency and maturity transcends ‘feelings’ of self while with the other. Sexual mastery offers depth and passion in relating. Volcanic stuff. Just what a bunny needs to feel moist. It strengthens intimate relationship potential. It is a force so powerful even felt without touch. I can just feel a woman’s sexual potential while looking at her…while we’re gulping down wheat-grass together.
So E.T would make your toes curl in bed eh?… He must be gravitational!
LOL!
E.T primarily thinks carefully about his feelings, then speaks what he intuitively thinks.
Whereas…
I instinctively feel my feelings (also links sexuality) down the atom, then express.
Thinking like an employee sitting at cubicle always gets me into a mess.
Heart Expression is not the same energy as just… speaking. Depth of Intimacy is the measure between them. That’s one fundamental difference in Mr. Tolle’s nature and my own nature.;)
There is no one path towards awakening, and there is certainly no dogmatic religious teaching of ANY tradition or person which is valid in and of its own. Feel/think… both seem to be intrinsic to me personally.
Where would I be on the scale from quiet to volcanic? Both. It’s the tidal wave nature of Piscean energy.
“Most importantly, sexual potency and maturity transcends ‘feelings’ of self while with the other.”
Fuck… I just GOT it… rejuvenation/rebirth from within every time. All I can say… I don’t know just HOW anyone can master that kind of energy… it must be a living Hell.
One last thing about this…
Sexual Honesty is everything through my being. It was not it my past. So when I see profanity from Robbins, I don’t hear profanity. I see/listen to him as an iconoclast who knows exactly what he is doing and why he (consciously) shocks a person.
I never lose respect for iconoclasts, risk takers for humanity, brave souls, engaging souls, who really do love others. I see tremendous love within Robbins regardless of what language and sales persuasions he uses.
Again… depth perception of intricate human behaviors of/in life are not a superficial assimilation of what’s happening in the now. It never is.;)
“depth perception of intricate human behaviors of/in life are not a superficial assimilation of what’s happening in the now.”
No, it’s not, when the ‘now’ fails to be framed out towards the world at large. Which is what you see in Robbins, away from his promotional gifts.
What is sexual honesty to you?
You don’t understand the eternity of the present ‘AS IS’ each micro-moment. Because you cant SEE the present. Or what love IS. Or what any behavior IS. The ‘now’ is not a logical concept as you have written above, as you enjoy the rebuttal to my perceptions of eternity.
Your damn ‘rules’ of this world don’t change. That’s your model. That’s why you can’t see a damned thing of what I am showing you.
Robbins was engaging one woman in the audience (direct feedback from her). Compared to E.T… does he engage and provoke feedback from his onlookers? No. Actually don’t answer me. I’m sick of this. As I said before, E.T is a lecturer. He does not commit his experience in the present by transforming people, which was my point in showing you the Robbins video.
I don’t even want to answer you what sexual honesty is to me. There is much you don’t get in life. Blind as a bat. You don’t know love, as my instincts told me a long time ago. Your model in your head is what wins.
I’m the idiot. Just go away 😉
Fuck this, I’m on vacation.)))))))
Hmmmm.. I woke up in the middle of the night just FEELING that explosion…
Read the sentence above. It supported what you said, not ‘rebutted’ it.
Enjoy your vacation:)
Puppy…
If you offer me a glass of white wine, and I tell you I prefer red..
..it does not mean I do not love the gesture. It doesn’t mean white wine is somehow ‘less’. It doesn’t mean white wine has no qualities. It doesn’t mean I don’t ‘want’ you to drink white wine. It doesn’t mean I will never drink it either. It simply means I prefer red… It doesn’t MATTER, because what matters is – you shared the wine..
AS IS.
Hmmm… what do spiritual awakening and sexual intensity have in common?… You. I feel it reverberating through the air:)
There was so much sexual innuendo going on around me when I was growing up… men trying to lure us six year olds into their cars (not how my rape took place, btw)… buses packed full of sweating people and there was ALWAYS some creep who would try to get into the knickers… once a family friend brought his friend into the house, and when no one was around – he did just the same… men on buses making suggestive remarks to me and my friend (we were 13) like ‘Come with us, girls, we’ll show you what paradise is’.. we didn’t have a clue what they meant.. a young man trying to persuade me (I was eight at the time!!!) to go to the toilets with him.. taxi drivers ASKING to jerk them off… The list is… endless.
Can you see how then women end up offering sex in a misguided belief that THIS is what will make them loveable in a man’s eyes? How the sexual energy becomes something to be traded, to be exchanged for ‘goodies’ of various tangible and intangible nature… All women want really is to love. To nurture. To cherish. I have known VERY FEW women (two actually) who saw sex as just that – a means of physical gratification. They were sexual predators in their own right..
Like you, in my twenties I explored that.. with a complete lack of understanding of what it actually meant.. men are fascinating creatures. Many women are not consciously in touch with their sexuality AT ALL, and do not see sex as the driving force of life. I have always been very sexual, since that four year old saw a man’s torso under the water faucet.. yet it was not conscious… you know… like a dog, never connecting the dots of what it was running in me and how it related to men at large out there. In fact… in my being/mind/body ‘it’ only related to ME. It was mine, completely. That Scorpio man was the first one who consciously pointed out that aspect of me to myself and made me realise this power OVER MEN. A late lesson. Yet, I still have not FELT the deep deep meaning of it.. maybe the seventh house does need an experiential/relational mirror, and since I haven’t had any for a long time now…
What do you understand as a woman’s sexual potential? A potential for what?
Transcendence and sexuality… This is an interesting topic and one I have not consciously explored yet… E.T. truly lost his personality so there isn’t much to boost… I would want to have lunch with him, and the thoughts of sexual nature would not cross my mind, or maybe they would IF I found the interaction fascinating in its own right… You do realise that X factor comes in various guises and is not necessarily connected to sexual energy – INITIALLY? Love begins in the head and heart, not the pussy, or maybe I am too much of a woman that way..
Would E.T. (or you, or Anthony Robbins, or anyone, for that matter) make my toes curl in bed? Not when there is no love. Because I wouldn’t make it to that bed. Those were my personal lessons of learning to be discerning.
Having said that.. now I feel ‘it’ rising just from what you and I have written.. LOL
“You do realise that X factor comes in various guises and is not necessarily connected to sexual energy – INITIALLY?”
Actually…hmmm… it is much more subconscious than that. Overt sexuality is not that attractive. It’s the subtly detectable life force that we pick up on, often without realising that… so even when the initial attraction disguises as something else… the body already detected the signal.. without that (sexual chemistry) pretty conversations and any other activities will stay just that.
im halfway through the tony robbins video. wow very powerful, i like his completely honest, straight up, no bullshit approach.
so true.. men just want women to be happy..
sometimes we cant be happy.. and its nobodys fault.
but there is that moment of honesty that isnt always easy to have.. easy to blame and want to be fixed saved rescued distracted from the feeling rather than own it and feel it and move on from it. sometimes it is like this round and round thing of fighting awareness- knowing at some level of the truth that he just wants me to be happy and feeling guilty for the fact of not being happy and him not making me happy.. but knowing its not even about him, and wanting him to stop feeing like its all about him and his thoughts of not being able to make me happy. that baggage word,, burden. resentment. fuck , sometimes it all just builds to the point of where you feel like you just have to be on your own, like this is all happening because its not meant to be.. because there isnt enough love, because you’re both free spirits, because you are not meant to be in a relationship, because he doesnt love you, because he can feel your pain but cant fix it and he feels helpless. and its that same old thing… men want/need sex to feel loved, women want/need love to feel sex. and therein lies the dance.. and when it vibrates to the point of being the same.. when all the need/want dissolves and falls away and its just pure giving and receiving at the same time, thats where it transcends and goes beyond self.And that is the love.
Beautiful video, i was in tears in the end,, she was like a different person.. i could see it in her eyes half way though, like something was lifting from her.
And she made the steps for change.Handed over her power to something greater.. surrendered ,and let herself be truly vulnerable..she opened up.. and the storm passed, and she was then able to receive love and give love.
Thankyou for sharing that.
Puppy… all that took place here was, has been – LOVE…
Love path is not linear.. love is meandering through rainforests of tears, high plateaus of Joy and deep canyons of despair… It has a million hues, from the blackest black to the whitest white… its subzero temperatures make the teeth ache and its inferno fires burn the skin black… it seeps through every pore and drowns in own sweat… it caresses the cheeks into glow and beats the body black and blue… it swallows anger and explodes with rage… it has affection of a child and cruelty of a tyrant… It wants to breathe freely through every twist and turn of the path.. Love is perpetual motion within infinite dimensions… a million bittersweet moments expressed through gestures, body, eyes, facial expression, sex, tone of voice, deeds and acts, and pauses, and silences.. those speak the true love language. ALL here has been love, in our own twisted ways, but there has to be that moment when all ceases, when it is accepted as is.. without checklists and definitions and expectations of WHAT IT SHOULD BE.
I seem to keep hurting you, without any intent of doing so, by simply being who I am.. I don’t want to bring this discontent to you again. And I don’t want to feel your moods, AS THEY ARE, thousands of miles away.. getting
shivers every time you are about to go nuts, before even you write anything or, like yesterday – waking me up through that.. There is an elephant in the room, and I am tired of you not recognising it.. and then feeling unappreciated when I do not acknowledge it in a way acceptable to you… We’ve said ‘good bye’ and ‘go away’ too many times, and never followed through with it.. Fifteen months… we BOTH are a wack job beyond belief.
I’ll leave, I’m blocking the site, and All stops now.
Describing love. There it is again. That’s you.
You don’t hurt me. I only feel compassion for people – I LOVE.
Stop praising your-lack-of-self so blindly. That ego is so easy to destroy.:)
I Quote…
“Pistorius challenges strict bail conditions in murder case”
“JOHANNESBURG (Reuters) – Lawyers acting for “blade runner” Oscar Pistorius, accused of shooting dead his girlfriend, wants his bail conditions relaxed and passports returned so he can travel overseas, South African media reported on Friday.”
“Television channel eNCA said Pistorius and his lawyers felt his bail conditions were unfair.”
“In papers before the high court they argue that Magistrate Desmond Nair was wrong to order Pistorius to hand over his passport and travel documents given that the magistrate found the athlete was not a proven flight risk,” the report said.”
————————————————————————————-
Pass me the cricket bat, I’m getting on a flight to Johannesburg. Settling this guy’s deeds is not the responsibility for corrupt political sheep.
As in the movie V for Vendetta… V seething with intensity says.. ” There is no court in this country for people like…(fill in the blank).”
That’s why V cut out their tongues when he killed them. That response to darkness is ‘a symbol’ for the power of (parasitic) influence across humanity, and what corruption does to oppress and dominate the unknowing innocence of society.
The only verdict for this guy, is vengeance.;)
…and while I’m at it… the insects called lawyers who defend him are to be erased also;)
Well then.. try to see past my descriptive FORM.. and your behaviour that IS – into the substance of WHAT IS.
Below was written by a Scorpio Stellium in the 9th House;) and is highly accurate. One for you (the 7th), and one for me (the 1st). I am posting it here, but you and I already know why 1.5 years were so engaging..
The people you love must be very special indeed.
I trust you now, and I will miss you.
The 7th House Pluto:
A person with the explosive planet of Pluto in the house of relationships rarely has smooth interactions with people, whether in love relationships, business partnerships or friendships. They may not realise it, however, and always perceive the other person as the difficult one.
Pluto is tranformative and only does so through the power of destruction and resurrection… constantly. So, anyone in an intimate bond with those Pluto 7th House had better be strong, feisty and persevering, because they will get torn down – often!!
1. Pluto in the 7th House carry bombs – innately imbedded in their personality.
At any time these bombs might go off. People with Pluto in the 7th will engage in conversations, debates and activities that degenerate into highly unnerving, exhausting and often accusatory battles. Consider it a strip search, or a soul strip search. These people only rip into you when they can expose your guts and your secret shames out into the open. They may admit no such secrets themselves, instead projecting their weaknesses onto you. They don’t want you to lie on the ground, bleeding and wounded. Instead, they really want to repair you, rebuild you in their image (the most intimate kind of intrusion). Someone without a strong identity may be driven into psychosis or panic, entangled in such a relationship.
Don’t expect the apologies after the dust of a Pluto bomb explosion goes off.. even if it derailed a nice dinner or a fun party. Instead, expect NO.2..
2. They get turned on and want to be sensually intimate after destructive battles.
After a Pluto in the 7th person engage in a collision with you, you might want to call them a four letter word, but don’t be surprised if they call you
‘darling’ and try to get you between the sheets. Arguing is like an aphrodisiac to these people.
3. They get attracted to Scorpios for partnerships.
Whether by conscious choice or by fate, people with Pluto in the relationship house often end up with Scorpios. It could be because when they are one on one with people, Scorpios recognise the Plutonic energy and are drawn to it. Pluto people by default have difficult and dramatic relationships, this itself lures Scorpios who detest calm relationships as shallow and boring. Either way, bringing together of Scorpios with the 7th House Pluto is wonderful. Scorpio is a potent personality, and a 7th House Pluto will run over a weaker person.
4. They are magnetic.
Pluto not only has the force of an atomic bomb, but also possesses the power of a magnetic force field. We are not talking about just any force field – think as powerful as the Black Hole. People with Pluto in the 7th House pull you to them so forcefully with their charisma, that you can lose yourself. They forge a bond hard to escape. There people plant roots in your psyche. You find them hard to avoid. One of you will become obsessed with the other! After all is over – there will be a soul tie that lingers forever.
5. They are controlling.
When you are on a one to one relationship with a Pluto in the 7ht |House person, be prepared for power plays and constant jostling to see just who has the upper hand. This relationship has no place for the helpless and the naive – you WILL be puppeted.
6. They are constantly leaving relationships – or getting left.
Unfortunately, the fiery explosiveness of a 7th House Pluto personality eventually burns the relationship to the ground. Either the Pluto person leaves, or mates will leave them. This excess Pluto energy in relationships over time will be too stressful for many people to stay. These Plutonic people may find themselves constantly trying to re-start bonds or searching the world for new ones.
8. They are more powerful and dominant than Scorpios.
Yes, Scorpios are ruled by Pluto, but today we are talking about people using Pluto directly as a tool of relating. That is major. And the force is way more intense and potent that a Scorpio Sun. Are they as emotional and loving as Scorpio? Of course, not. And while these Plutonic people love sex, they primarily use sex for power and control, whereas Scorpio uses it for bonding and falling more deeply in love.
Scorpios with Pluto in the 7th House are a different breed, of course. They understand Pluto and can rein it in. Pluto is so integrated in their personality that they can wield it without being as damaging or overbearing.
The 1st House Pluto:
People of any sign born with Pluto in the 1st House are known lovingly in the Zodiac community as Plutonians and adapt a person eerily akin to Scorpios, but not quite as marvelous. These natives give off the Scorpionic energy because Pluto, the rule of Scorpio, resides in their house of self expression. The stronger or more dominant Pluto is – whether by aspect, sign or other elevated status – the more Scorpio like their behaviour and physicality.
The 1st House in a natal chart governs outwardly expressed personality, which involves everything from our appearance and dress style to how we behave under duress or in a company of people who are strangers and those we don’t wish to reveal our deepest selves to. It governs how we see ourselves and how we actualize ourselves.
Like Scorpios, those with Pluto in the 1st House are intense, whether in an ostentatious or an understated way.They have inside a powerful energy that to some might even feel electric. Depending on the strength of their Pluto, this energy can allow 1st House Plutos to be Pied Piper personalities, able to lead cults or inspire social revolutions – this can apply to anyone with super concentrated Scorpio, 8th House, Sun conjunct Pluto and other Plutonian energy… that is if the person chooses not to be a loner and overtly private, which is another trend for Pluto influenced people.
They may be controlling not only of their environment, but of anyone they admit into their environment. They likely are passionately emotional, but the extent to which they show it depends on their Moon sign. They might be mysterious and prone to transforming their image or looks in cycles, or they may go through non physical, inner transformations.
Pluto in the 1st House may be provocative or even rebellious and subversive, rejecting rules, social customs and expectations. They definitely don’t care what society or authorities think (although you can’t tell that by how defensive they get).
The 1st House Pluto people might be accused of having strongly combative or ferocious personalities, whether they actually do or not. Some can be sexy in a magnetic way that makes them irresistible. Pluto does, after all, govern obsessions. Plutonians might, in fact, be obsessed with sex and hyper sexual in their activities.
On the flip side, because Pluto governs the Underworld, mysticism and occult, these folks might, instead of sexy, be scary or sinister looking. They might relish fear, be creepy and indulging the dark side of life. Even those who are not – don’t rule out their power to attract the creepiest people as associates.
Obviously, not all Plutonians express all these traits consistently, because individuals use the same Zodiac energy differently; but they will definitely
express some of these characteristics as signature part of their personality.
Some of famous Plutonians: Stephen King, Shannen Doherty, Kurt Cobain, Dalai Lama
Well first off… your natal chart, your path, is RULED BY– MERCURY.
Not Pluto. Get it right.
So stop glamorizing an energy, a consciousness, an occult power, which you KNOW NOTHING ABOUT as demonstrated in your attempts to bond with me every time I demolish you. Quoting through your assimilation is not original or deep or bonding or transcendent. Quoting as you always do…again… is Mercurial. Mercury is the witness. An extremely limited witness. Watch the news tonight. Those journalists on TV are Mercurial. Article writers in print are Mercurial. THEY ARE ONLY WITNESSES to what they see with their five senses. The five sense are nothing in touch with the occult of Pluto, Neptune and Uranus. Their perceptions are not creators and seers of depth perception beyond Saturn. They are mortal witnesses of life. That’s it.
And another thing. Your Midheaven is ruled by Gemini. Again– Mercury. The Midheaven is equally as important as the ascendant. You wish to be acknowledged through the world (the 10th house) as smart, persuasive and intellectual. That astrological fact screams at me. So does your need for intellectual attention. Again… Mercury. Not Pluto. Not occult. Not powerful.
Your personality is not ‘powerful’ through my eyes. A soul which commands the personality is powerful. Not you. Stop portraying to the public that somehow your intellect and soul is powerful. When in truth, you are not One with the divine. Get that into your overworked head. Because love is non-existent in the void which separates us. Powerful being or creation from soul is ‘the expression’ of love from an eternal center. Not a commentary booth. True beingness is whole with the Force, far beyond the five senses of time and routine that is eons past the physical Mercurial circus you inhabit every day out of that cluttered cranium of yours. Love is not the ego, which is what you demonstrate every post.
I get only irritated, NOT ATTRACTED, by your extreme immovability in spirit and your jolly Mercurial commentary about what you think spirit is as if you were separate from it. You keep implying that I am attracted to you when the Truth has long been my contempt for you. From that oblivion, YOU STAND FOR NOTHING through my eyes. Again…you irritate me. You do not create with me. Your comments are not powerful as you egotistically believe they are. If they were actually powerful, I would see THE LOVE OF TRUTH between us, not the feeble (Mercurial) games to compare and commentate as if we were separate from the Maker.
Gatubela has a far stronger personality than you ever will. Her heart is beaming with love and feminine essence. She knows who she is through spirit and in soul. Her experiences have touched my soul, through her centered love expressed as she truly is. We have experienced truth and growth together right here. I trust her and have the utmost respect for her.
You ridiculed JoJo many times without conscience… as your mercurial journalism perceived her “as crazy”. No nut-job. You are the loon here. I promise you. JoJo has the strength to see herself and be a woman through her misguided choices by loving in truth. Non, Not manipulating. JoJo and I are not separate through spirit, we love and see each other clearly. She has a uniqueness your separation of spiritual essence will never understand. I trust her and have the utmost respect for her.
LovMari’s soul is with me. She is a divine woman who really feels for who I truly am, no matter what the experience becomes or what I do. We have bonded through the vessel of love and truth here in writing. I trust her and have the utmost respect for her.
Umm is a woman who I respect, even though her feelings confusion and attachment wanted to control. I know Umm’s intentions to bond with me have been innocent and good, even though she was unconscious of her desires to possess my individual separation. I love Umm, and I know she has learned much through her experience as I have.
That Mercury attachment to form which governs your life, fizzes very closely to the Sun (the ego).So don’t praise your Pluto or Uranus placement as an energy you CONSCIOUSLY understand. Because those two outer planets with Neptune, are trans-societal GIFTS YOU MUST EARN through death and rebirth over many lifetimes. Your enclosed consciousness knows nothing beyond Saturn amid the certainty of mortal life, while through the existence with people.
You are not initiated with Pluto, Uranus and Neptune’s “knowing”. So swallow that.
Quit your laughable comparisons and presentations of what you blindly “think” of me. Because your relating ability has no vision beyond the Mercurial commentary to broadcast what consumes YOU between the ears.
Hey Journalist… if I didn’t understand who I am, or understand what I’m becoming, or understand where I fit in the nature of the human world, you would not have the materials to abuse and manipulate on this website the superficial need to… ‘expose me’.;)
Fools expose nothing. And you wonder why I get irritated.;)
Well, if you noticed, I hardly ever quote, I prefer to write my own stuff. Like for you, there was enough written here to see.
I don’t relate with people ‘in writing’. I simply relate in real life, in Being. Writing is not actually who I am. You are right, I got myself into all this of the misguided want to ‘bond’ (huh, I dislike this word) with you, but a few months back I understood that it is not possible. When I spoke to you recently – I simply wanted to communicate what I was experiencing as my insights, but even something as simple as seeing different ways of affecting people (E.T. and Robbins) gets you into a twist.
I guess for me relating in the real world is much easier. Which is what I will carry on doing.
That was a long piece from you. Just know that I do not want to ‘bond’ with you, or ‘posses’ you, or whatever else comes into your head. You demolished my way of viewing the world. Then I gained and lost my obsession… Then I lost my defensiveness… Then I stopped being upset when you ‘cut through’ me with a cleaver.. The relating that you see as valid is one hurdle that I have never mastered. At least I had courage and stamina to go through with the demolitions:)
You see… again I saw your piece coming before you wrote it, so am answering straight away.
No regrets. All are valuable lessons, and not much to say anymore;)
Tell me something about myself that I’m unconscious of?
See. Your game is no secret to me;)
If I do – you will perceive it as unloving. As everything you perceive from me:)
Do you really want a list with examples? I don’t feel you do.
Not a game. Anyone who knows me will tell that I am as far from a player of any kind as it gets. People do detect this kind of dishonesty easily.
Since we are on questions and game playing…
Tell me…. do you want me to completely stop talking to you——> In one short answer… YES or NO.
I forget to acknowledge Miss Pink and a bevy of other women I have engaged with in the past. You guys are not forgotten. Every one of you has taught me something magical and sublime. Thank you to all, and I would hope you guys are not afraid to share your comments and continue that goodness through your light, regardless of one cretin who keeps her criteria attracted through the dark. She forgets that dark is my home. It’s what is natural for me. But that does not mean I FEEL HAPPY in that immense complexity, ambivalence and emotion.
Detached love makes me happy. Love at a distance makes me happy.
Which you gals have always beautifully understood. Your beauty has released me from that unforgiving habitat. And It’s been an honor.
—————————————————————-
When I ask something I always mean it. Truly Listening is alien to you. So repeating myself is another thing I must endure. Sure, write “your list”…. If that’s what fulfills your ego needs… do it.))
“And another thing. Your Midheaven is ruled by Gemini. Again– Mercury. The Midheaven is equally as important as the ascendant. You wish to be acknowledged through the world (the 10th house) as smart, persuasive and intellectual. That astrological fact screams at me. So does your need for intellectual attention. Again… Mercury. Not Pluto. Not occult. Not powerful.”
But my Midheaven MC is Taurus 19°41’34”?????
I wish to be acknowledged through the world as someone who make the home beautiful, sensual and extremely comfortable. This is where my talents lie.. I am not a career woman and do not have one or such…. I have a knack for creating a comfortable home.. I cook well… I have an extremely good taste… I create the atmosphere where people can relax and be themselves. I dislike intellectual debates, because I can never remember any facts, my knowledge comes from feeling the overall picture… I am not good at debates… My cleverness is of a different kind – I SEE people. They know it. So.. they come to me.
You understand nothing about who I am:)
“I wish to be acknowledged through the world…”
It is not true in essence, just grabbed Puppy’s sentence and ran away with it… I do not wish to be acknowledged in the world. At all. That’s not who I am. Worldly ambition holds no true meaning to me, never did, hence no career.. but yes, I tried to ‘fit in’ and failed.
Hard work only pays in true sense when it’s the heart that drives it.. I understand the meaning of wealth now.
Game over.
YES.)
No, Puppy, there won’t be any ‘list’… I am glad you are finding your comfort, away from inner turbulance brought on by your desires and the female energy.. But notice this… this cretin was the only woman who made you talk about YOUR INNER REALITY AS IT IS NOW, in many many words, with seething and anger, yes, but you ARE ABLE TO SAY IT. Not about how it was years back, not theorising about the events of the past. What is within you – NOW. That’s why you seethe, and I understand that, you feel a great intrusion. But honest communication between a man and a woman is based on the EMOTIONAL HONESTY OF THE PRESENT. Like a woman – you talk in riddles. I saw those, and I also saw THE BEHAVIOUR, the two never converged in you. And that’s your blind spot – your own inability to be emotionally (not factually and philosophically) honest with people. Your inability to be emotionally open about YOUR NOW. As I said before – this is NOT honesty in my book, but game playing and guess work.
Unlike you – I feel a lot of compassion for you, and none of what you say really makes me unhappy or otherwise. You are honest in expressing your immediate moods, but so is a child in the supermarket. This is NOT HONESTY. You are honest about dissecting another, when your own little foibles stay firmly shut. This is NOT HONESTY. You are honest about your views of the world, but bulk at another’s. This is NOT HONESTY. And I do not want it, never wanted it, with a man. In real life the supportive female energy listens carefully and takes note, but here it is void of real communication tools other than words. For instance, I am smiling as I am writing this, can you see it? NO. And that is the problem.
Love wants to know ALL. Down to the very last molecule. Because if I do not know – I cannot love a man. In that way – I love you.
Good Bye.
And another thing… love at distance is an escapism.. from the realities of love. You are the one who is running, as I always knew. It is the easiest solution – to withdraw Self emotionally from true involvement. There are women out there who are not in the least interested in possessing a male.
But that’s you, and that’s who you are. If that’s what makes you you happy – great. Does it?
*quietly* my Mercury is in Pisces. So is my Sun, Saturn and Mars.. My Scorpio is in Neptune. It is ALL about the feeling perception… not intellectualizing it, but the expression may look like it… Scorpio energy (Pluto) is familiar to me on all levels, sexual, psychic and physical … I feel it, and now notice it consciously… complexity, ambivalence and emotion. The psycho/sexual energy of it can be devastating, but also immensely constructive when channeled elsewhere… This is not the theory I am writing, it’s my reality, since childhood. There is nothing easy about it, yes. But there is always a choice within, the release from within. I am gaining a strong handle on this now. On my own, not through the love of men….
True vulnerability comes at a price… it is not about lecturing what it is… and not about ‘exposure’, but about allowing self to be in it… ‘exposure’ is a word loaded with insecurities… I have not ‘exposed’ anything, and neither have you. We simply released the truth, and this in itself is an immense ray of sunshine.. This is the only way it works. Not looking for the release through love of other beautiful souls, no matter how nourishing it feels..
We won’t talk again.. as you wished.
I am looking forward to seeing this.
“Your beauty has released me from that unforgiving habitat.”
This is the habitat…
“I FEEL you. Tremendous emotional energy inside of you which always threatens to come out. It almost feels physical, doesn’t it? It HURTS at times, that’s how powerful it is, isn’t it? No shit, I’ve known it. It CHURNS inside like a ball of fire. It grabs at your throat and chokes. It sits in your stomach pit. It blinds. It fluctuates from day to day and hour to hour. There is a NEED to expel it.”
I said it 1.5 years ago.. way before any in depth understanding… I meant every word. Because it is mine too.. I didn’t lie.
Why I feel so much compassion, yet cannot express it lovingly – I don’t know. But.. it’s there, like a cloud, it hugs me and makes me want to give it away.. but here it stalls.. no bridge between what’s in the heart and what flows out. That solitary Venus… yes, compassion… for Puppy’s turmoil… for Gatubela’s love.. for Umm’s innocence… for JoJo’s depth.. for LoveMari’s strength.. The key to its release is love.. of another, Pisceans absolutely bloom when it happens, and it begins to flow out like a river then.. I just have to find the key, and I am glad Puppy has found his, but for me it is ONE, not many. One love. Devotion, no matter what… that’s who I am.
And maybe I ‘commentate’. But only on what is REAL in me and around me, what I feel and see in self and others. I never CONSCIOUSLY lie. Ever.
Well…it sure would be interesting to know what the heck you are subconsciously doing…
Bloody scarey
There are little things in life which make the heart feel glad, and sometimes life feels drab and we need to keep reminding ourselves of all that IS, HAS BEEN, GOOD. Both past and present, what are the things we are grateful for? I know people do not share things like that here, but… things I am grateful for…
1. My son, most intelligent, most enlightened, most supportive person, whom I love and worship and who worships me. I am grateful.
2. My mum who is so supportive and who would sacrifice absolutely anything for me. I am grateful.
3. My friend Caroline who understands the trials and tribulations of life and who can always give me a fresh perspective on everything, from house decorations to the state of mind and body, who will never betray and with whom I have a true soul connection. I am grateful.
4. I have a roof over my head, and it is in one of the most beautiful parts of one of the most beautiful towns in England. I am grateful.
5. I have good neighbours whom I get on with and who do not (anymore) make each other’s life a misery, because trust me, it can be hell. Sorted. I am grateful.
6. I have food on the table, sometimes not plenty, but we survive. I am grateful.
7. My bicycle which gives me exercise and hours of pleasure, takes me out to nature and which I imagine to be a horse sometimes! I am grateful.
8. I am yet healthy and strong and can do things for myself which many people struggle with. I am grateful.
9. My ex who has, in his own way, never abandoned us, like my own father did. I am grateful.
10. The beautiful massive sash windows in my flat and the beauty of the place which is 200 years old and is unique. I am grateful.
11. The thoughtful and enlightening books that I keep finding in this charity book store and which give me a lot of wisdom and peace and understanding. I am grateful.
12. My good proportionate figure which does need some pounds shed, but it always looks good when I make an effort. I am grateful.
13. Our cycle trip to France last year which absolutely confirmed to me my ability to live on the road and be SO HAPPY with it. I am grateful.
14. My versatility in everything and my ability to adopt to circumstances, without demand and attachment. I am grateful.
15. All the people I met on my life travels who taught me the beauty of the human heart, even when we do not acknowledge this consciously at the time. I am grateful.
16. Hot baths with essential oils which I love and which take me to a different world all together. I am grateful.
17. Cherries and blueberries, my favourite, I am happy they exist! I am grateful.
18. Meditation which sets me free, in that blank white sheet of no time and space, and each time I feel calm and still and know that I am able to face the world. I am grateful.
19. Eckhart Tolle and his pure unassuming manner which is the BEING in flesh, the most true and unpretentious state of mind that makes me filled with hope for humanity. I am grateful.
20. Burgundy red colour on the walls of my sitting room, and the French crystal chandelier which leaves intricate shades I like to observe. I am grateful.
21. Peter the Carpenter who makes things for me for peanuts, because he likes me so much and because he has a good heart. I am grateful.
22. This beautiful Earth which I would like to explore in depth and I know it is a possibility very soon. I am grateful.
23. Nick who has been around for 15 years and will always be and who I can rely on for the sheer force of male physicality, and his utterly stable character. I am grateful.
24. Gentle Cotswold Hills where I spend a lot of time with my bicycle and where I can connect to nature one to one. I am grateful.
25. The Internet (yes!) and all the good people which populate it and make it a fascinating place to be. I am grateful.
26. Candle flame that takes me to primeval states of being, back to ancestors, back in time where I feel like home. I am grateful.
27. Samaritans which have such a fantastic organizational structure, because there is no money involved, and it is so very caring in all aspects. I am grateful.
28. My guitar which I am bad at, but it gives me pleasure and gives my heart a voice, no matter how feeble, haha!!! I am grateful.
29. Gorgippia, an ancient Greek town on the Black Sea coast which I participated in digging and a two thousand year piece of an amphora that I kept and treasure more than a diamond. I am grateful.
30. People of different nationalities which live in England and make it such a diverse place to be, no matter the conflicts. I am grateful.
31. Witnessing history when standing in the square during the coup d’etat in Moscow, surrounded by tanks and feeling the sheer power of thousands of people together who did not want the life as they knew it. I am grateful.
32. Snow which makes any place serene and peaceful and removes the noise and clutter of everyday life. I am grateful.
33. Roses and forget-me nots, the most regal and the most plain, yet both beautiful in their simplicity. I am grateful.
34. My first boyfriend who was an individual and who taught me to be one, with love and appreciation of my talents. I am grateful.
35. The cliffs of Moher in Ireland where I felt a touch of divinity and at One with the Ocean. I am grateful.
36. My ability to mess things up and always make good, no matter what. I am grateful.
37. The night sky which my son and I often observe up on the hill with binoculars, and it takes me to the world beyond this one. I am grateful.
38. Camp fires crackling to the sound of a guitar, and people singing.. something becoming an unknown to most people. I am grateful.
39. Dogs which love without expectations and pretense, just because you are. I am grateful.
40. Sexual release which sets the heart and mind and body into a state of peace with all there is. I am grateful.
41. That I am a woman, and I like being one, and it makes my heart glad. I am grateful.
Years back I said once in a group ‘Life has no meaning. Life IS the meaning, that’s the meaning of life’. I understand how true it was, it has been… Life is really that simple, and it’s humans who make it complicated and miserable. I am ready to go back and embrace this simplicity. Because I am not complicated at my core, it’s the Mind/body which makes it so.. the soul is simple. I have all the tools I need now.
Peace.
Yer missing a couple of screws Miss Gifted and Grateful.
Why? Do you not have anything in your life you feel grateful for?
I probably am, by the sheer fact that I posted it here LOL.. it’s OK, ignore. It’s not the place for it.
…and you can save your holier than thou bullshit too…and your GD superior attitude…
Go play in the park on the swings
It is probably the first time in many years when I acknowledged that there ARE things to be grateful for… what is upsetting you, Gatubela?
I got it. who is that mind entity who thinks, THINKS, it is having a RELATIONSHIP with self, who is Self, what relationships is that, who with? who? who wrote that and why? i’ve had enough of chipping away at it, and every little stone falls out.. like a bomb…i’ve had enough of knowing, awareness, understanding, and the mind ego just sits there and laughs and says I am still here, look what I am making you do… read that piece, it is full of SELF, BLOATING with it… I’ve had enough, if something somehow does not change, if i cannot find it, i will help her on the way out, this is no life anymore…/ I wont post again, its bullshit.
Yet you are misery for me.;)
” Life is really that simple, and it’s humans who make it complicated and miserable. I am ready to go back and embrace this simplicity…”
—————————————————————————————
Yet the 900 impulsive and cluttered self-serving posts validate your starvation of that simple reality.;)
Anybody who believes you as a loving, likable, “grateful” person, sure hasn’t received that gratitude from you in their hearts here on this forum.;)
I see deep loneliness from the impulsive overcompensation to be significant and loved.;)
That’s how ‘simple’… you…. are.;)
Nah, Puppy, no loneliness or validation. My problem is not lack of Clarity. My problem was the inability to make that soulful decision AND STICK WITH IT. I mean.. I lived my life before coming over here 1.5 years ago, haven’t I, without feeling lonely and whatever else, I hardly ever do, it’s true… It’s just that Taurus Moon gets pretty stubborn in its tenacity to emotionally cling on to what it got to know… familiar and deep, never wanting to let go of that familiarity. it doesn’t even have anything to do with you anymore..
I am aware of that and know it was the wrong choice to keep posting.
I have to leave, really.. and bloody stick with that:)
“You’re Stubborn”?…
For sure… ego entities, rigid mental attitudes are fixated/glued with stubborn-ego-attachments to empirical logical facts. Do you think/believe that your accumulation of facts is the knowledge of-self you need to grow through spirit?
Is the stubborn realm the same as breathing through a true/loving realm of spirit?
So if you say you’re not lonely and you don’t seek approval outside of your physical body, but that you’re simply “stubborn”… what meaning or clarity has that reality of stubborn given to you in life? Is stubborn virtuous? Can you grow from stubborn-ego-attachments?
Who has given you feedback and responses to penetrate that stubborn-ego? Do the accommodating people in your life and under your control challenge your insecurity?
If you say you know what soul is, why do you manifest the confusing accumulation of logical data via streams of disconnected intellectualism?
Soul is. Soul knows. Love gives (as I am doing once again through this post), Soul receives from growing, seeing far beyond the fables of disconnected intellectualism;)
I know.. watched E.T. online after posting (subscribed to his free stuff, it so resonates with me).. and he said something that the bomb shell just dropped.. I see that which is Self, which is not me, but here it is, like you said once, a separate entity, like a cloak.. years of accumulating that mental image of who I ‘think’ I am, but am not. It’s like here is my body and my soul, and there is that ‘thing’.. I just went hysterical, with crying and laughing at the same time… and my post (and others), *shivers*… I am scared to drop back into it, you know I want it to go SO BADLY, but it keeps SUCH A HOLD, that is the subconscious Ego stubbornness, not the one I consciously cultivate, but it is there… Egos do not often die suddenly, well, for some they do, for me it seems a slow and painful process.. as I said being aware with acute understanding is one thing, and Being as in really feeling it with Knowing is a different story, so every time a bit of Being hits me, it’s like taking the skin off..
I am taking from you, I realise that… it is SO VERY IMPORTANT TO ME to HAPPEN, because if it does not, – I will not know what to do with myself.. there is no one to challenge me in that way. So I stayed… your energy, that which transforms, because yes, I am afraid of dropping back to how things were.. everybody has their own path, mine just seems so… up and down, it is moving forward, when I spoke to you a year ago I was a fuck head, just barely scratching the surface.
Look… I feel ill, like a zombie, it was sudden, my energy is completely drained out of me..
Puppy… ‘thank you’ doesn’t even come close
Not interested in your games Ines. Just said what I felt from you.
Gatubela, I feel the same way too. The inner warrior awakens when there are soulful choices to make. Maybe with her there is none, so it’s all playtime. Yes there is no point commenting on her posts, it would feel like you are just giving her more dolls to play.
Not interested in your games Ines. Just said what I felt from you. Bye,
well, I expressed what I felt, how can it be a game… so I don’t know what you felt…
even if I lie on the floor with a gunshot wound, it would be perceived as pretense of some kind. I get it. I am the fool. No, I am the FOOL. I will have enough sense to stay away from here.
Damn, my computer is freaking out from the loading script…
Be well too, Gatubela.
Ines, I really hope you are surrounded with good people who can truly care for you. Take care of yourself.
Thanks, Lovemari, you too, really. I’ve now made a soulful choice, the one that’s right for me:)
jon spencer blues explosion mann!!!!!! sex rhythm go crazy honey yeh huh!!
It is not what I thought it was. Not… at… all. I felt that I was being honest, yes, on an Ego plane. But when the Unconscious expression of Self takes over, one is blind to the game of it and does not even call it a game…unconscious, yes.. that answers Gatubela’s question on what it can do. A massive
identification with own mind creation.. my attachment to form is emotions.. millions of past impressions that create a story, and here are your illusions,
here are your reactions, here are your ‘hurts’, ‘misunderstandings’, ‘evaluations’, ‘comparisons’, the logical stream of ‘explaining’.. That entity believes in own existence, my emotional ID attaches self to every other tangible form out there, expresses through material, intellectual, physical channels, a seed of destruction already buried in that, as there is no true conscious Presence in the moment, everything is filtered through that Ego prism. Total lack of bodily awareness replaced by Mind Identity, a disconnect.
What is left when this goes, that entire arsenal of warped, imaginary Self? Does Ego die or does it transcend Self into some higher form? Ego is so subterranean, hidden as far as possible from vision and sight, the Neptune energy of the Subconscious is the scariest of all, the Unknown, the uncovered.. *shivers* my own energy faced.. where have I been? This is where the relating part breaks down, how can one relate to anyone from the point of ‘protection’, whatever it is they are protecting, and they are not even aware of it..
I can see now why some people self harm.. I don’t, but the emotional pain can be that severe, it wants to be physical and is.. like I was rolled in nettles,
except the feeling is also inside, in every cell, an internal fire, like consumption… self value? self esteem? Esteem of what? Of who? Just another prop.. there is something deeper than esteem. There is a space from what is gone, and there is true essence in what is left, but I still don’t FEEL WHO the other one is, the REAL one. I cannot yet see WHO I AM.
The questions themselves didn’t matter, but the intent.. when someone looks at me and calmly says ‘Consider this..’ just that kind word which breaks the
dam. it can really go either way now.. to the heights of creation or total damage and oblivion, surrender, yes.
Ok Ines. I am ready. There will be an end to this. Are you prepared for that?
No, Umm, not really, how can one be… just an intense fear, nothing like that before..
What are you afraid of?
Imagine that… all that you have known to be true about who you are – is no more. Fear is only the Ego’s attempt to bring one back to what was.. because fear is imaginary too, the mental constact of mine.. playing tricks, but there is no anchor right now, from which to make choices, because that which is the real Being within cannot be seen by me yet, the one which makes decisions solely from the core, the Source of me and all there is… what is the core? Herein lies the nature of true love.. when something or someone is not loved for some ‘property’ or ‘quality’ they have, but loved JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE, because they exist in this world… a cat, a human being, a stone, the Ocean etc. etc. the nature of Self love is in that, as misleading as this ‘self’ sounds.. it is much more profound than ‘me’ time and all the things we buy for self, say to self, do for self… it is immensely deep, that love. Love you just because you are… And I am oh so close to feeling that profoundly – but not yet. Hence, the fear.. will I cross over that barrier, or will I, like many others, go back to what was, unable to reach the depth of it… or even worse – stay in Limbo.
So fear becomes of – the totality of life, until the choices are made from within. That’s the Within that I have been searching for all this time. The fear of not connecting to it.
Ines, I’ll ask you again, what are you afraid of?
“…Fear is only the Ego’s attempt to bring one back to what was.. because fear is imaginary too…”
Yes, fear is imaginary through the third-eye sight ‘of Deep Individuation’ in relation ship with the Source and the desperation/capability of humanity
Fear however, among limited sheep and ego entities pretending to be significant, SEE FEAR AS VERY VERY REAL.
Why??
As I’ve said before… the routines of surviving and ‘getting ahead’ through the use and abuse of other sheep is the superficial limitation of soul which creates that fear. The fear to feed ones-self and others dominates THEIR DIRECTION. Meaning their direction is not Individuated and Created. Their direction was deeply prescribed to them in family, school, friends, job.;)
“Ines, I’ll ask you again, what are you afraid of?”
Umm,
“that which is the real Being within cannot be seen by me yet”
Fear of failing to connect to that true essence.
Ines, how would it feel for you if you were never, ever able to connect to that essence?
This question is loaded with fear, Umm.. How would I feel if I lost use of all limbs? I don’t know. Those ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’.. I just FEEL it for what it is, a transition from one state into another… something will emerge from that. it is not real.
Ines, see this as a journey for YOU. ..so how would it FEEL? Try not think about it too much, but focus on that feeling you have, not why, or how or fighting it, or defending it, reasoning with it or shutting it out, or squashing it with logic and rationale.
So you likened it to having you limbs cut off.. go into that feeling, how would that feel…to have your limbs cut off, what would that be like for you?For you never being able to connect with your true essence?
Sorry Ines, I mean, how would it feel if you lost use of your limbs?
She (her nature) is afraid of CHANGE. Taurus is cemented in it’s values all their physical life.
But her young soul was not destined to be on my spiritual path. So the relationship with her fear on her baby path is futile, from the perspective on my specific journey with fear.
The Bull archetype through human manifestation is utterly immovable in feeling and seeing and transforming of themselves. Hence their opposite — Scorpio, who is the epitome of destruction, resurrection and rebirth BY NATURE.
In fairness to Bull archetypes, they are just baby souls in the plan of universal human evolution. Their souls can’t stretch much further than WHAT THEY VALUE or perceive in their model of life.
Herein lies the essence of Stubborn.
My mother is a bull. I have cut her out of my life from the time I was 18. She is impossible. Just like the immovable bull. Taurus’ VALUE the SECURITY of the tangible. People… through the eyes of a classic Bull, are absolutely alien in terms of difference, uniqueness and objectivity … because Taurus THINKS EVERYBODY VALUES WHAT THEY VALUE. i.e the money for an ease in life, the great physical comfort, sloth, hard work, their orgasm with food, sex, touch, physical companionship and sharing physical resources. That’s about the extent of a Taurus’ reality.
What stubborn (cows) fail to “know”… is that the multiplicity of human beings in so many diverse cultures and environments don’t think/see/feel and value their same damned limited values!!
Sure those values in their heads work for them… but when it comes to the matrix of inter-relating with humanity, on deep intimate levels and broader universal levels… Taurus is thicker than a slab of concrete.
I.e… they stick with what “they know”… regardless of heart/mind and soul constipation.
My mother fears ‘for me’ because I KNOW that she is deathly afraid of her ‘phyiscal’ possessiveness and limitation of understanding.
This means that Taurus is emotionally manipulative on the superficial level because of their desires to possess a loved one ‘Physically’ via their tangible and unconscious behavior. And Scorpio natures are notorious for possessing the people they love Emotionally/Sexually/Psychologically through their intangible unconscious behaviors.
Both archetypes are trapped in fear of the unknown. More so Taurus, because the Bull VALUES ITS SECURITY, as unconscious Scorpio will unleash fury to ‘destroy’ that utterly immovable state. Scorpio can’t evolve with anyone if the people in their life are immovable in mind, heart and spirit.
So both forms of possession are fearful of the unknown. Both forms of possession create extreme co-dependency issues and dysfunctions, again on the comfortable plane of superficiality. Both possessive archetypes in human behaviors are terrified of being alone both physically and emotionally
Thus a couple living like this ‘values’ material comfort and security over personal evolution.
This truth is everywhere among us.;)
It’s the feeling of being completely, totally, utterly vulnerable to everything.. No protection… all out in the open, it hurts.
And if I look deeper – feeling vulnerable is about – TRUST, lack of or abundance of – in my inner Being, and in all that’s around me. Egos don’t trust. They are like a night guard on ecstasy… ready to pounce at any sign of a ‘threat’… The conditioned response is to shut down, I am holding space for this vulnerability, and that feels mightily uncomfortable.
Yes, I can see that from openness to love within – ANYTHING is possible.
So you are feeling completely, totally, utterly vulnerable to everything, that you have no protection, its all out in the open and it hurts, yes. FEEL that hurt Ines.
Going deeper, you are feeling vulnerable to trust and that you have a lack of trust or abundance of in your inner being and all thats around you. yes. you are holding space for that vulnerability and it is feeling very uncomfortable.. yes.. FEEL it.
When you are feeling this vulnerability, this mighty uncomfortability, this hurt, what does it make you feel like Ines?
Umm..
I know.. HOW to feel. I know… HOW to cry, when feeling and tears are not attached to the Mind… there is no suffering in that, pure energy.. Love for the Being of me. Light BEYOND the attachment to Form, eternal and formless Neptune energy. The Dissolution of personality limits comes from there. When trapped in own Subconscious, or from numerous abuses into the adulthood – this innocent energy goes underground, for all of us, as it did for me.
Pisceans carry no secrets, and my journey has been public, but my private time now.
thanks for the love.
xx
What does it make you feel like Ines?
Control… takes many subtle forms. Sometimes delivered as a loving kiss on the forehead.
So .. those feelings of vulnerability and hurt and no protection are making you feel like you have no control ..
No, Umm. I spoke of you.
I don’t mind having my car demolished, if it’s dangerous to drive, but someone grabbing hold of the steering wheel.. nobody ever attempted to do it here. I may crush, but it will be on my own terms.
Remember I’m my own psychologist:)
Ines you are greatly mistaken. Your fear is taking over your mind again.
No. I sense the difference between relating and ‘counselling’, Umm
“Ok Ines. I am ready. There will be an end to this. Are you prepared for that?”
Post 1833.. I was the annoying prat who thought that by dragging stuff out of someone I am ‘helping’. A nut job, haha. A covert form of control if done with a goal in mind.. It’s subtle in people…
Peace
Good to understand you are learning something :). I have no interest to fight you Ines. You had your own steering wheel (and still do, just like I have mine –I’m not on your path ) . You make your own choices and decisions for your own life, and that is your responsibility. What you just showed was your projection of what you were initially feeling ,but then started to fight- your fear of not trusting what is around you . I am just here to show you what IS around you and that it is possible to trust. I have seen and experienced what it is like to be immersed in fear and fighting that fear with every ounce of energy you have. It becomes a fog , and you cant see what is around you, and anyone that comes near and tries to challenge that fog or try to get through it is met with all your fighting energy- that is the projection-and it spirals and keeps spiraling.. until one surrenders fully, and I mean – FULLY to those feelings. Yes it hurts, there is no way around it. Until then it will keep spiraling round and around and around, which is what I have witnessed from your posts over the last year or more . This forum is not just for you Ines, I think you know this deep down. I understand that you are in a lot of pain, but until you surrender fully to those feelings so you can experience growth and healing, which is what this forum is about, to care for self, and have self love in order to care for and love others ( here on this forum and out in the rest of the world), maybe it would be helpful for you to minimize your posts to allow the space for others to come in and post as well. Maybe it would be helpful for you to go and have that private time, or go and sit with someone outside of here so you can feel safe to develop your trust. Maybe it would be helpful to find somewhere outside where you can vent your anger and hurt. Whatever it takes. I understand it can be a slow process to heal , I honestly don’t have all the answers, but I do believe a boundary must be set.
what does it matter… your fear, my fear, someone’s bravery… look around you. In five, ten, twenty years all that you see will be no more. Or maybe even tomorrow, who knows.. The Light at the pearly gates, the brain’s last attempt to send you off in peace and love.. every person you see – is ash. look behind, generations of those before… where are they, their individual struggles, pains, joy, their beliefs and convictions.. infinite forms going back to Infinity, the cycle of transmutation into that which you will never recognise.. ‘we’ are our memories, beyond that is Blackness and Oblivion.. see those who lost theirs, it will tell you much, like it told me. Feel that call of the never ending.. You will never remember your path once it’s completed. None of it matters.. the nature of this existence.. atom upon atom of building the matter into organised chaos, the nature of time… so yes, grab hold of this Consciousness, it laughs in your face because it ultimately knows the End..
Nobody comes back from the Dead. This is the Piscean Universe… The beauty of life is that it ends. In Infinity. No one can feel it as acutely… None of it matters.. life is just one big joke.
and so believe in God? Sure. pick a deity, give it a name.. YOU are God. Universal Consciousness speaks through you, via millions of extensions of accumulated garbage of human existence, all those entered and left the face of this Earth.. here is your culture, here are your rules, here is your biology, that which tortures people… and when you are gone – it is really DONE with you and on to the next object.. and if you are hoping for penance – it will not be forthcoming, life is that simple – you are the DUST. Get used to it, Ego or Love, proclaiming love of all is Ego too, nothing from the Being… treat them with love, because life already treats them like shit, those lower lives… and yes, we choose that shit too, but there is such a thing as ‘chance’, tell otherwise to those who died in 2004 tsunami, Boxing Day, holidays… and the Connecticut shooting kids who simply went to school… no, life isn’t fair, but all ends some day, even the unfairness, it all ends.. the same way.
All I wanted was Being… and all I got was – life. I cannot help, but laugh at this irony…..
I am going
“.. but there is such a thing as ‘chance’, tell otherwise to those who died in 2004 tsunami, Boxing Day, holidays… and the Connecticut shooting kids who simply went to school… ”
Each and every soul walking this earth in the flesh has it’s course to fulfill with the incarnated body the Source bestowed them when arriving in this world. Those souls you deem as unlucky died for a divine purpose, beyond your intellect, into another human life form birthed in another time. Mothers and fathers who have suffered loss of their infants via miscarriage or tragedy know their children have passed on in spirit. There bodies may no longer exist, but their souls certainly do. Their very short lives did not end because of “chance”. Because spirits ‘don’t end’. If people “ended”… then so would the universe around us end. Those people whether new-born or 99, regenerate from their death into a new life.
If one believe’s the fleeting fragility of our existence holds no true meaning in the scope, scale and power of this powerful universe… then one believes the outside and inside of perception are the same reality. A reality at the mercy for life as utterly meaningless. I.e.. Atheism. From that separation of divine consciousness and forces beyond ones very limited human intellect… one believes in the outside happenings of decay and fearful confusion to aid as determining comforts for ones ego-ovulation. Yes ovulate — To birth an unconscious believed myth it can coagulate and feed from in it’s projections and control in the outside pain of reality.
I don’t believe in chance. Just like a little leaf eatin’ deer might stand at the foot of a huge mountain. That deer is minding it’s own business, it notices that it’s about to get steamrolled by a thunderous avalanche. The deer’s biology as a living creature has divine meaning in the greatest scheme of it all. Bambi’s spirit has cosmic meaning through the ecology of it’s natural habitat. That’s why the ancients always revered and honored their kill before eating it. The ancients deeply understood the sacrifices every living creature makes for the one another in universal reverence. Yes we are shadows and dust, But that does not mean the spirit echoed in eternity from each person is sans a true course… or meaning.
We are all headed somewhere. The path we take… is well… what I’ve been sharing all this time.
Chance is not Faith. Chance is the mound of turd known as Las Vegas and other toxic holes built by man through media/celebrity illusion. Who invented Vegas from a thought into a form? No, it wasn’t Bambi. The human animal I’m talking about lives right here among us, spreading his seed without much care in the world. His existence is chance. He is mortal. And so his soul will be accepted as such when he dies.
The story of Bambi holds a very special meaning to me. It’s the first time when I felt the feeling of – INJUSTICE. And DEATH. Those two gave me the very first real feeling of misery, the knowing that this world is not a fairytale ground. I was six at the time, it was shuttering..
So you believe that ‘first there was Word’.. word, thought, volition… intentional creation… everything around us is the result of intent (thought) creation.. in a Biblical sense… Divine Consciousness.. But Earth is 3.5 billion years old, humans are a nanosecond of existence on this scale. If people end – the Universe in not going to, only our human perception of what Universe IS – will end. I believe in objective reality which can only be perceived SUBJECTIVELY, so yes, the outside and inside perception are never the same, the tree sees/views/experiences life differently to any other creature, and each tree experiences it differently from one another… but to grant the DIVINE IMPORTANCE to the human race as the Source and the Reason of all existence is egotistic belief in HUMAN PERCEPTION as the end all and be all. There will be other life forms, and other creations to thrive, like the dinosaurs thrived for millions of years, without giving a toss about what’s to come. The Eco system of Chernobyl zone became case in point, a nourishing ground for creatures to procreate and take over, without the intrusion of human habitation.
We are nothing in this universal scheme of things. But we have power and ability for self determination, while in this world. This is the Spirit. But where was the Spirit during the Mesodoic period, or even before when Earth was a hot rock? If the Divine Consciousness leaves nothing to chance – we are not the ones to KNOW it directly and can only observe the cycle of creation and destruction from our limited perspective. Ultimately, it’s a matter of faith.
The souls of those plucked out of their current existence – will never tell you or anyone about their further journey. YOU, as you know it, your form – will die. And your spirit… well, you will never tell anyone about your life as is now – forever. You are the Ocean, not the drop. Sure, it’s comforting – to know one has the purpose to fulfill. But reincarnation is not how people believe it to be. Reincarnation is the torch of accumulated knowledge and understanding carried forward through generations.. It’s the encompassing HUMAN EXPERIENCE that lives on, not an individual entity, the Self. We are the torch bearers, not the Torch. God is ALL, all is interconnected as part of life, every stone, animal, leaf, mountain.. we are all made of the same stuff.
Atheism is just another label, made by humans for humans, a separation. Labels mean nothing. I know atheists who live – from their heart. The Eagle I know is one such person. He is mortal. When he dies – his soul will be accepted as divine, like millions of others.
Giving body to belief in own importance is laughable, we should not take ourselves and our limited, bodily conceived perceptions so seriously. This is where I find my comfort and release. Death is a blessing, not a curse.
“…but to grant the DIVINE IMPORTANCE to the human race as the Source and the Reason of all existence is egotistic belief in HUMAN PERCEPTION as the end all and be all…”
It is perceived as egotistic belief only if one perceives humans, animals, plants, nature, the cosmos— as an existence solely of the flesh.
So that is the egotistic belief you perceive right now through that perception;)
If the fucking ancients gave divine reverence to all living things, How do you come to the conclusion that Human divinity is above nature?
Nature is us. That does not mean we are separate from nature as humans scrambling on earth. Only fucking EGO perceives separation. *** The Us vs You illusion. *** The I’m better and smarter and richer and sexier and more popular THAN YOU (separation) …. tiny moronic illusion..
Get it????
Read Yahoo posts. Read Facebook and Twitter posts. Perceive what they are SUPERFICIALLY perceiving, every single time.
Then come and tell me they are conscious of a universal divinity. Then come and tell me they are awake to forces greater than their own weightless opinions.
Again. You will never see or understand what separation is because you cannot see it. I don’t heal the blind and ignorant. I let them be. Mingling in a crowded room full of similar SUPERFICIAL perception is blindness. Conformed personalities. More pervasive than you’ll ever know.
..and my point was not to “label” atheism. You implied that separation via lack of consciousness.
Atheism IN OF ITSELF… IS A FUCKING SEPARATION OF A CONSCIOUSNESS, SELF-CONSUMED IN ONES SELF-IMPORTANCE. —ONES CAPACITY TO SEE. Which is tiny.;)
I’m over this. Talk to others. Not me. GO.
“How do you come to the conclusion that Human divinity is above nature?”
How did you come to that conclusion when I say “God is ALL, all is interconnected as part of life, every stone, animal, leaf, mountain.. we are all made of the same stuff.”??
Separation… is not a noun either. Heck, it’s in the way people interact, brag about ‘stuff’, treat each other and all that’s around them, including this planet.. I do not see myself better or more superior than a bug or a forest or a river… I see myself as part of them, and they – part of me.
Let’s get it straight… there is a trend here… YOU spoke to me if I remember… a few calm posts degenerating into a frenzy, repeating itself again and again. I was going to go, but I will say this (lovingly, huh)… if you EVER talk to me like that again – I will forgive you… but will NEVER speak a single word to you again. GET IT? It may mean nothing here, but it’s the best I can do, given the present moment. Limitation of one’s Consciousness is not words on the screen, it is professed in action.
Now, mingle with others whom you are able to treat with love and respect, and leave me alone.
“If it were not for the presence of at least two people, there would not exist any “I” ”
Confucious
For the orientals, “I” does not exist. The internal does not exist. And although we know it does, I feel that perhaps you should explore these psychologies, in order to balance the internal ones that you appear, as per your writings, to have amassed.
It is known in oriental medicine, that a person can heal, quicker if they have an external and an internal agent. They will heal with only an internal one, but it will be much slower. With only an external agent, they will not heal at all.
We are linked to our organs more than to the planets for some….as our energy – chackra – must be aligned first in order to perceive those astrological beauties.
I must say that it is hard to read your writings. I hope you get off your mental ass soon.
Where is the *I* within? I don’t see one, but there are memories.. neuronal axons, have you ever seen those slow motion videos of a plant growing, slow formation of a leaf.. tiny branches creeping forward and growing around obstacles… there is something beautifully sinister in that. The axons grow that way, every chemical molecule found on its path is circumvented, the axon will find a way around – or will grow straight.. here is nurture versus nature, in its most basic.. those chemicals may or may not be there.. our memories formed out of a butterfly effect…
I see the point at which the flower stopped being one.. when my mum married again. I felt him as an alien, it was a torture to have him around, something was so wrong about him… the man who three years later plunged a knife into her back.. My mum said recently ‘You never told me you felt that way’.. what could I do, I was only a child. I did blow up on him as I got older… There was no affection, no kisses and hugs from mum… only a year ago she said for the first time ever that she loves me, and she does… My son has all the affection in the world…
I have given up wanting to be ‘who I am’, and wanting to be ‘who I am not’. Jim Tolle from the Spiritual awakening blog said to me ‘There is nothing to do. There is nothing to know. Melt and trust.’… Meditation is every waking moment, there is no *I* in there.. no memories.
Incessant chattering, of myself and others, feels painful now. I want silence.
Bye, Gatubela
P.Puppy….
Scorpionic and Taurean subconscious wooing techniques are not so bad. They are not with the intention of enslaving or causing harm. Actually, “in wuv”…just like leo shines the sun, sometimes, the best of us comes out as well. What is more insiduous is something beyond astrology, based on our basic and most rawest of selves. When a man subconsciously believes that all women are whores, that they are superiour or machista. Or when women subconsiously believe that all men are horny bastards who only respond to sex.
This is not astrology, it is the collective sexual energy. Deep, subtle and powerful. A man just has to give a woman an orgasm to know that love may not be part of the equation. And a woman can do the same thing to him.
Therefore, the harsh truth is the superficiality of orgasm. Because society does not understand love through death.
With a piscean perspective, taurean energies are not primitve…they are to be mastered. The earth elements of hard work, are easily drawn out through evolved piscean channelling and adaptation. If pisces is grounded in earth, they dont go around the universe and loose themselves. hahaha!
“..This is not astrology, it is the collective sexual energy. Deep, subtle and powerful..”
On a very profound level Gatubela, each and every human being IS astrology. The verb.
The trouble though, is that almost every male who is supposed to protect and honor the female divinity, has zero to little self-mastery of that sexual energy you’re talking about. This is not a theory. Just pay attention to the acts of men disseminated to us from the media. and the males in your life and with other people. Astrology is simply a language of ancient symbols that should not be perceived as a dogmatic religion we idolize like “a thing” separate from us.
If we are awake via the virtues in life from continuous death, and if we connect meaning in all consciousness, and if we live by nourishing principles, and if we are brave to change our values of limitation, and if we listen intently through Gods’s breath, and if we feel and see and grow through uncertainty —– astrology helps us see meaning in the unknown, therefore making it known… and divine.
We are astrology. Because each particle in the universe is constantly changing and transforming. Each particle never stagnating in the same form. That constant change includes the human brain and our emotions (blood stream). The problem is unconscious babies are oblivious to the sublime rewards awakened when growing through death of stagnated perception and feeling.
Death or uncertainty is feared via the ego-self. So the stagnation formed of that outside mythos is seduced ‘when it’s believed’ by the creative culture, vanity and celebrity. Those illusions are ‘subconsciously’ worshiped and believed to be real and true. Thus the power those “things” hold over the human race. Again, watch the news. Flick on the T.V. Listen to the chatter of people. What exactly are they perceiving between each other?
The utter worship of of false gods such as money, things, sex and social status is the actual lie, from a spiritual perspective deep within us as a mastered-self. There is “nothing wrong” with those tools for happy and healthy living. It is ‘the meaning’ that people give to their things, experiences and people which leads to the basis and manifestation for their fear.
The hypocrisy among the human race is… I have seen/known, even devout Catholics, Christians, Muslims, Atheists, Jungians and Freudians and Astrologers who are completely mired in the illusions of those aforementioned false gods. Those extremely mortal perceptions of life by always looking to the outside for answers, is the cause and suffering of humanity.
“..Scorpionic and Taurean subconscious wooing techniques are not so bad. They are not with the intention of enslaving or causing harm…”
That’s too cute…an innocent perspective and understanding.
Gatubela, imagine how difficult this is for me, the consciousness that I see every moment, as I grow greater with God through that vision. People… relationships, in my life experiences have shown me the true meaning of stagnation. I mean, upon examining what those relationships have truly meant to me, I have discovered what true human stagnation is.
Stagnation of mind/spirit and soul.
All my relationships in life experience, in my early family, throughout my career, among my friends and associates…have all put obstacles in my way. Unconscious obstacles like jealousy, possessive intentions, lies, selfishness, lack, blindness in their intent, and dead-set LACK OF CARE and PRINCIPLES toward not just me, but of themselves.
Their value systems have remained the same. Stagnant. Value systems which are not stimulating or progressive. This existential gap of consciousness between what I see/understand, and my compelling needs for life-long growth and expansion on the straight and narrow path, is constantly tested. Constantly, psychic obstacles from low-nature humans challenge my growing identity among the collective;)
I am still trying to feel what you do with regards to astrology. Maybe its my uterus . LoL It was making babies before they popped out on a specific date under a specific constellation.
It feels as if Astrology is part of a spectrum perhaps, in which all colours join to form ONE color.
When I feel it that way, it feels like I am attempting to go back to its initial manifestation – as it seems to be the result of something greater. Creation.
I see it as a life forcé – based on unity.
Hahaha!… Umm that was very funny and telling of man’s unconscious existence. An existence labelled by techno-economic progression… as ‘evolved’.
The truth can be absolutely hilarious if we can see it objectively and without attachment. Gosh what bliss it is to laugh at the blindness of humans. Perceptions of humor happening all around us can truly be the elixir of life.
We can laugh on many levels… as an example…I also watched ‘People at Walmart’ in that bunch of Youtube clips. It too shows us the another truth of unconscious human behaviors. Laughing at these truths around us from a detached center is a vital ingredient for spiritual awakening.
Good stuff Umm. Outstanding.
which walmart one did you see? i didnt see any on my bunch, but did a search and found ” people at walmart im sexy and I know it”. (!) so wrong. Somebody wrote ” what is it with people and walmart?” yup. Kmart here in Australia is the same, maybe slightly scaled down version, but frightening all the same..in and out fast for the occasional pair of knickers or some socks is about it for me if I have to and even then its kind of a hold my breath experience. That Steve Cutts guy has a few cool animations Ive just discovered, he’s onto it.
Steve Cutts really didn’t show us the capacity of man’s blatant cruelty, their deeds over other humans in society. I’m talking about the horrific, senseless deeds done by man, to man, to woman and to child ever moment throughout society. That is far more significant to me.
Our planet is not feeling the victimization of life traumatizing rape, assault, constant theft and domination, exploitation and murder imposed on mainly women and kids. Those deeds have higher significance to me. It’s a humanity issue. The planet itself will survive long term, no doubt in my mind. I’m mostly concerned about what man does to the innocent. I’ve always had a very strong disdain for cowardice acts, people who run from their conscience. I’ve always had the vehement disdain for the sociopaths, con-men, abusers and leeches among all societies.
As you said before Umm… Lies are not harmless. Mans weak addictions to lies, to dominate the innocent intentions of caring people who want to contribute something meaningful should be protected. But those helpless people are not. Decent people who show sociopaths and control-freaks kindness and integrity are always exploited. Just look at it. Thanks to the male impotence he denies in himself, yet another lie. Lies are blind to virtue. They always will. It’s a sad truth.
Yeah, I guess when people dont even know the truth in themselves how can they see truth in another. If they are not aware of their everyday inner conversations,feelings and are sensitive, actually its more than that, it is just plain being aware. I can’t handle the abuse of humans over animals. Cant stand it. But yes I also cant stand abuse of man over innocent people.They are the same i my mind. It makes me sad every day when i think of it, the amount of injustice and cruelty that exists in this world.I doubt the planet will survive a long time unless we as humans radically change the way we are living in it. The weather is already going ass up due to climate change, icebergs are melting, sea levels are rising, summers are getting hotter, the ocean is being pillaged as if it is bottomless, people are getting fatter than fat while the rest of the world starves.Many species of animals are becoming extinct due to mans greed and ridiculousness.Sharks for example. apex predator, yet over fished and barbarically finned to the point of near extinction. And yet the majority of people are clueless , or in denial.Same goes for so many other species.People gorge themselves on meat.land is raped in order to grow grain to feed cattle which is stuffed with chemicals and hormones and mindless people who have no idea stuff burgers into their fat faces thinking nothing of it.Pollution is getting worse every year. the amount of plastic that is piling up in landfill and also ending up in the ocean and rivers is catastrophic.And coca cola are refusing a NT recycling scheme .. I mean wtf??? The population of humans is getting bigger and bigger every year..this planet cannot sustain it forever.we have do something. Every single one of us. I realise that there are lies.. and there always will be… well I dont know, if the past is anything to go on, then yes i guess the future is bleak too. But .. I feel like the truth is louder and more powerful than anything else..And I feel that nature and the earth and the universe is more powerful than us humans.
Impotence of men… yes it really is such an oppressive thing. Labels.. even the one of society itself can cause impotence.takes me back in mind to that thought i had a year or more ago… who was that greedy fucker who tipped it over the edge? Impotence of men..yes , and the huge overbearing black cloud of shame that hangs over their heads, no wonder the suicide rate of young men is much higher than women.I believe there is goodness in man too, strength and goodness, and kindness. I also believe in karma though, and for every single man who has hurt an innocent woman or child, they always get double the pain in return..
Yep just one big steaming cake of pooh. Won’t be long and we’ll have to build houses out of that pooh. Recyclable stink. Our bodies though Umm, naturally have billions of bacteria pulsing through our central nervous system… just like the molecules germinating in animals, water, soil, rock and plants. Bacteria thriving and giving more life both in the sea and on land.
I mean, the human body wasn’t designed to be a perfectly pure and supple skin Virgin? Was it?.. LoL. Our bodies are one big waddling parasite… relative to the particles of parasites that coexist in all of life. … even pooh. We’re now turning pooh into a profitable business… hahaha powering turbines and windmills. Bloody stinkers all over the place making a quid from nothing.
But yes the chemicals through industry are a good symbol of mans greed into form. Still, I don’t believe activists will ever have the final say over maneuvering politicians. It’s the people in this world who create that industrial Disneyland. Desire is the driving force. Money, the streams of it, will never be defeated by moral or righteous intentions from me or you or anyone else. Not in this world. The power of greed/corporation is the engine that keeps the leverage over us little people. And while that engine exists through the desires of man (not God) the human race will keep reaping precisely what it sows.
Charities/activists whom claim to be changing the deeds of greedy political sheep, are living in an ideological ivory tower. They might mean well, but they really do not understand the motivations of man. I’ve seen non-profit kids manipulating for green peace and other charities here in Sydney. They’re big businesses Umm. The money they rake-in is not saving any helpless whales or tigers from extinction.
There are alot of big businesses for sure.. and there alot of charities that are downright corrupt I agree. But there are also alot that do shit loads of good stuff.And I say to those kids who are standing on the side of the road trying to raise money to save the tigers or rhinos, good on them. Damn sight better than those kids who spend all day playing video games , or getting smashed and bragging about it to their mates. As far as knowing the motivations of man, I reckon Bob Brown and Paul Watson know enough about that to want to challenge it and do things different. If it wasnt for tough, gutsy people like that who actually give a shit and are doing something about it, the world would be a mess. Not that its not a mess now, but it would be more of a mess. One huge hot mess..drowning in poo.and dead animals. One day I will build a home, and I will have a compost loo. And I will grow my own food. This is something i would like. grow tomatoes from my bacterial poo that biodegrades beautifully and safely and healthily to feed a luscious tomato plant,which I will eat with basil pesto I have made myself. And live in my ivory humpy haha . care to join me?? hehe. Seriously, i reckon if every single one of us grew their own food and kept consumption from the earth to a minimum, the world would be better… maybe, just maybe..all those mindless fearful anxious lost souls who dont know how to connect and are smashing their cars and spinning out from too much ice/ alcohol/ tv/pokies/etc etc et tc might just find some solace in something as simple and nourishing as that. its a good start anyway.. alongside other stuff.. such as releasing stored up fears, anger, grief,. and becoming AWARE. Awareness to make better choices that arent supporting and filling out greedy ceo’s pay-packets , what to buy what not to buy… which companies are corrupt, which are not. yeh, money will always be around, for as long as we are using it and supporting it..
I had a thought yesterday as I was driving in the car. ( car…. yes another thing I should really do without..when it comes down to it.. there is so much that is wrong.) Anyway.. I was on the road, and I was singing , and I do this most days lately, sometimes with words but mostly without. And the words that came out were ” this is good, but that is better” then i went on to ‘this is bad and that is worse”.. I was thinking lately about this striving we have.. this want , this desire, this must fucking have THING, that us humans are running around on this planet trying to get to… and all the judgement, and “nah thats crap!” , “this is what you call a chair!”, “hey check out my blender it has a de fuzz button that turns into a disco when it gets dark!” ..” wow cooooool “. We all just wanna have fun and do it better.. always someplace better, future is better, brighter, grow up, get married, have kids, acquire shit, get rid of shit, acquire more shit, etc etc. look forward to getting away from it all, from all shit you acquired that gave you a buzz when you first got it.look forward to your retirement, have a great death with velvet coffin and someone you never knew talking fondly of you..
And then theres this laziness when it comes to truth… hence religion… and so many things that people rely on, because they are too lazy to figure it out for themselves. Even when it comes to organisations.. yes people can be so blind and will just tick yes even though they have no idea what they are signing, you dont need religions, organisations, fashions … they only become this through so some lazy bugger who couldnt think for him/herself and decided to put something or someone on a pedestal and hand over their personal power. to an ism. an idea. just to feel a sense of connection.. cos they have no connection to themselves and to nature, the very earth and universe in which gives their every breath.That which sustains them,,, yet which they are so far removed from. And yes that separation.. is what is causing humanity to ache. Every single lie that we blindly choose to ignore to feed our separation and wondrous sense of self and uniqueness is the poison that seeps into our subconscious. Everyone is trying to feel connected.. oh yeah and we are so connected through facebook, internet, phone, twitter, blogs,tv, newspapers and the like, but how connected are we really? connection is knowing what your loved ones poo smells like as it rots into the warm earth. connection is knowing and feeling and smelling your own poo as it rots into the earth. connection is looking at a cloud and knowing that that cloud has travelled further than you ever will.looking into someones eyes and seeing the universe, looking into an animals eyes and seeing the universe. putting your hand against a treetrunk and feeling its warmth and its knowing and its heartbeat. ..knowing we are not separate from every single drop of rain and every grain of salt in the ocean. Not understanding this is the lie.
oh and i don’t mean feeling your poo as in touching it… more as in being aware of it.
LoL…
Mothers do actually have to get down and dirty with baby and toddler poo. and boogers. toe jam too.
hehe… yes thats true, ah the joys huh. ive heard that baby poo smells sweet before they eat solids
It can all be so overwhelming. Sometimes all I can do is just curl over and cry. Go down to the beach and cry and yell and sing and cry for what we have done. The surf pounding the tears away , crashing into my head, my arms, my face, my chest ..rolling me over, twisting me, and surrendering into the ocean’s arms with forgiveness again.
I guess there is always going to be differences of opinion, ways of thinking,beliefs, just as there are many different languages,cultures, tribes. Thats diversity.Diversity of the human race.Just gotta all care for this little planet that sustains us.Too many people with their heads up their bums, with their verbal diarrhoea, professing this and claiming that,theorising and still not finding satisfaction.Still not giving a toss about anyone but themselves in the end.Just got to get on with it really.
“It is perceived as egotistic belief only if one perceives humans, animals, plants, nature, the cosmos— as an existence solely of the flesh.”
Maybe one day I will ask you what you see… and will tell you what I see..
Eternity is real.
Dont buy home brand hot cross buns this easter, or woolies brand or coles etc, they are full of palm oil. and avoid nestle chocolates. again, palm oil. orang-utans in indonesia and malaysia are being killed for palm oil plantations..as well as elephants, some species of tiger and rhino. Palm oil is murder.Best way to stop it is to boycott products using palm oil.
Umm, look at these… they are absolutely stunning, and real… I don’t know how he does it.
http://www.clarklittlephotography.com/gallery/gallery/6-0-BestSellers.html
I had a very telling and lucid dream last night.. somewhere in an exotic faraway place, with people I didn’t know.. and suddenly my teeth started falling out.. in a weird way too, crumbling into debris, one after another.. I lost most of them. I know exactly what my Subconscious has told me. I tried to imagine for one moment what it would be like if everyone on Earth suddenly became enlightened and alive… and it is, would be, scary for most people. They would not know what to do with the gift, little fortresses walking around and hiding behind those walls. Sometimes with every new drop of awareness I became disorientated and didn’t know either… until days pass, and it falls into place within, and the answers come in… It is an amazing amazing wave… when faced with own fears through the dark wanderings inside own mind’s crevices, the only step forward is to GO INTO them – in the world. The rewards are immense, I feel so very alive and so free… and how strange that when we are speaking from an authentic voice people are actually taken by it, and things start happening, shaping up in the way I have envisioned them… imagination combined with action gives birth to creativity of owning one’s life, anything becomes possible. I set the wheels of motion in place, from my inner voice which has been telling me for the past few months where I need to go. It became unstuck, and I realised just how much beauty and power there is in holding each fear in the palm of my hand, observing it and then – crunching it through action.. the choice to stare it in the face.. and fear crumbles, nothing left but a pile of imagined undesirable ‘outcomes’ and a solid grasp on reality of what is right in front of me. Life, not its shadow reflection in the mind.
There was so much guilt and misery induced here, for not being ‘who’ I was ‘expected’ to be, for my ‘intellectual’ expression, which is only that – an expression that comes from gut feelings.. the nature of my mind which connects the dots (feelings, thoughts, actions) into a circle, the Whole of being human… a dolphin does not feel ‘guilty’ about being a dolphin, does it.. but it does not matter ‘who’ – anymore, ‘who’ is unimportant.. I don’t want to be a ‘who’.. yes, it was very public, every feeling and thought, and the more one chooses to share those the more they are open to get ‘under fire’, all inadequacies, fears, delusions, lacks, all can be seen and observed, and so easy to point out and say ‘You LACK’.. People went away and nurtured their grief and discontent and pain in private, was there wisdom in doing so? Perhaps, that’s they, that’s me, accepted as is, not hiding the journey… Going into the ‘normal’ life, with its pettiness and human delusions and wrestling to keep own truth every moment is not easy, no, but those who are asleep – are no better or worse than those who are awake. They are simply asleep. I’ve observed that fearful clingingness to the known, anything outside of this comfort zone induces terror, painful to watch so many people in unconscious suffering.. That’s their path.
And Puppy, whether you truly feel me so set in my ways, or you chose to drag me up each step, knowing that I can walk… no matter, I walked a hundred on this million step ladder… and like with Plato’s cave, we step out of it and then choose to go back for there are others who are still in the cave, imprisoned, and so you went back.. There are two distinct feeling states of being: on top of the world where things happen, the adrenalin rush, emotional energy looks for creation, to make those mountains move… and at the bottom of the valley where reflection and integration takes place.. this last one has the flavour of eternity, a connection to the Force beyond self… to achieve peace we need to war, and every other state in between becomes equanimity, from that deep knowing. And we fall in love with life from acceptance of all those states, in self and others, and from seeing the consequences of our choices which are born in those ambivalent, yet powerful experiences. The WILL to truly live.
.
I am watching The Passion of Christ, strange that I got it in second hand store just days before Easter… that scene where Chaifa questions him and he says ‘My kingdom is not of this world’.. to say how it is when the answer will not be understood, will be twisted into what it’s not… to stand by it.. how easy people betray themselves, for saving the feeble flesh and sacrificing own Spirit, a denial of own consciousness, the cowardice of humanity… The fallen angel talks to him, his shadow is there, urging silently ‘Give up, you are only human, no one will know’. But he knew that HE will know, his heart and soul will know the betrayal… and this keeps playing every day in the world, and people wash their hands.. of themselves, and the suffering carries on, the Spirit killed in every little act of turning away, in every act of cowardice, the disease of no principles, no real essence of living, just a game of surviving, and we pose and pretend and look at another often inwardly knowing they they are lying… a vicious circle of propagating own weakness and a lie of making it into ‘strength’.. this world is built on denial.
http://shine.yahoo.com/love-sex/10-biggest-reasons-men-resent-wives-143100288.html
i.e… Riddles!!
Emasculate the weak then huff until you go blue in the face… bunnies.;)
Social consciousness is a rare commodity, isn’t it… People do not see beyond their own needs for survival. Trapped? Yes. Glass ceilings are real.. Enslaved? No. True freedom says otherwise… there is nothing… nobody out there… responsible for your life. Only you. All communities out there have rules, but whose rules are they? For whose benefit? Human rules, the immediacy of ‘gaining’… what? Family, social and work structures, friendships… human rules which do not always gel with your own.. The invisible spiderwebs of others’ fears suffocate all the way to the grave. And they think they are free, huh..
I refuse to be pigeon holed. Always have, always will. From that space within – all is as it should be.. when it’s not pretty – it doesn’t mean it is not valid and real. Solutions, even when all is crumbling, and one has to place all on the line – to progress.
Vulnerability without discernment is a road to abuse, of self and others, even when they do not understand what abuse they create. Innocent looking and well intentioned people, who at a push – become murderers, ready to walk the corpses… Not gonna happen. It doesn’t have to be big, only to be true.
http://au.lifestyle.yahoo.com/marie-claire/features/sex-relation/article/-/16522899/the-real-reasons-women-have-affairs/
Confused… helpless… bunnyism.
Hurt, is a part of life. Denying any hurt, by telling lies to any person, is pure bunnyness.
At deeper layers of unconscious female behavior, her existential denials of any “hurt” revealed to herself and hurt by withholding the truth from him… means:
1. She is lying and deceiving him and herself. Because deep down, she does not respect him as a man. She does not respect his purpose as a man when she understands that he is not a vigilant, aware and exciting man.
2. HER LIES MEAN – she cannot respect him, because- HIS INDIFFERENCE and inept sexual vitality toward her and toward world, does not arouse or stimulate her feelings and intuitive consciousness.
3. Her stagnant, brother-like feelings in a committed relationship with the guy or husband, means, she is living an unconscious lie in that relationship. She simply does not know on any level what she truly wants, BECAUSE… the male is always indifferent during conflict, unsure of himself, and he is afraid to make her unhappy.
Stagnation is two people living an unconscious lie together. Because “hurt” is perceived (feared) as something that should not exist in life.
Thus the illusions of personality in relating.
This illusion manifest is absolutely everywhere.;)
Let’s court fear. Let’s chase it and dance with it, in heart palpitations and sweat.. it gets bewildered and puzzled, the fear does not like to be confronted. An air bubble.. a puff.. and again.. and again.. we go on.
Unless that lion is a metre away from you, ready to pounce – it is not real fear, but a thought story written in invisible inks.. Then again, from that space in and around us – the heavens suddenly open. ‘Hurt’ fades into an illusion it is.. sweet freedom.
Every Saturday night I see this playing out.. she slams the car door and walks away, he runs after with a swear.. or she sits in the car and he drags her out, she screams and tries to fight him off.. or they are standing in the middle of the road having a loud argument, she then cries and runs away… ‘she’ and ‘he’ are always different people, but the scene is the same. ‘Hurt’ is created, the drama is unconsciously created between the two. Hurt is uncomfortable feelings when our expectations are not met.. people love to hurt. Those kinds of conflict are meaningless because they lead to nowhere, no understanding and growth gained from it, just drama.
When I started seeing my (ex)husband I told him two things… ‘Stay away from anyone I personally know, in your sexual exploits’.. and ‘If I ever stop loving you, you will be the first to know’.. I delivered on that one and walked away. I had conflict in my marriage, as well as effortless cooperation. How does one not conflict when two prostitutes ply him with drinks and empty out the apartment… when the entire proceeds of a flat sale are gone into the hands of two Liberian crooks… when there was a ‘contract’ on his business associate’s head and so on him by extension, and he chose not to let me know, I had no idea.. when my best ‘friend’ was made pregnant by him.. and I was so utterly naive, I ENCOURAGED her to come to England when I wasn’t here, simply because I wanted her to see the world… I had to examine my own contribution to this marriage which could have gone straight into a movie.. vulnerability which creates a futile soil for abuse.. we need to CHOOSE WISELY who to be vulnerable with and especially HOW… without boundaries it is giving another permission to abuse the trust and love… and there was love, I could have given my life for him. And you wonder why we shut down..
Somewhere deeply and instinctively, women have known what a man ‘should’ stand for… and did not see it in their males.. men can be weak and unprincipled, they see no value in honour.. The personal costs to women are very high.
and so I was that woman who ACCEPTED what was unacceptable on a very deep level.. creating the self abuse and psychological self mutilation. I CHOSE those deeds and let them manifest in that previous life of mine. An ultimate sacrifice of own integrity… True love does not demand integrity to be a sacrificial lamb on the altar of personalities… there is a point of mutual truth… a support and care for inner beauty, both own and another’s… if we get to see it clearly. Do most people miss that?
“…or they are standing in the middle of the road having a loud argument, she then cries and runs away… ‘she’ and ‘he’ are always different people, but the scene is the same….”
Yes the same self-indulgent scenes. Different people on the outside, that is.
Race, religion, class, intellect, popularity, image… are all irrelevant props if we are able to see the meaning in those collective human myths happening all around us (and in our own lives for most). Myth blind to natural forces so much greater than ones strutting, dramatized, egoistic, self-importance… as seen away from it, detached.
Perceiving clearly among that drunken, selfish insensitive collective social standard of “normal”, we understand that it’s the inner-realms of people in their conflict doing as it does, and not the actual outer model of life happening around their physical self. And each persons self-indulgent needs to scream, manipulate and fight ‘to be understood’ is a level of microscopic consciousness so utterly compatible through the collective superficial stasis. I hear and observe the same futile arguing and cursing echoing down my city streets almost every night!
Yes the personal costs to women are very high. History has shown us what people would do with each other to simply survive. Ethics and principles are not a valuable commodity while in the game of using and abusing someone to feed and shop.
Girls have for millennium been the receptor of male seeds in all types of relationships. The male seed is represented from the animal intent of objectifying women’s sexual power… ‘as things’…they can fiddle with for acquisition. Our society makes sheep believe that the male social value is high if he can acquire tons of stuff for the approval and companionship of women. If this entity were not true, there would be very few money-hungry males through our human history utilizing their ‘things’ to get what they desire from women sexually. The trade agreements of sex for security is the epitome of the human animal.
The human has always hungered. He or she hungers to feed the container to satisfy it’s enormous greedy (desirous) appetite. An animal out in the wild feeds its belly full then walks away and leaves it for their young, until it is ready to hunt and eat another day.
Imagine if humans had that kind of soul divinity?… That instinctive sense of sacredness for life and death?… without entity?
“Imagine if humans had that kind of soul divinity?… That instinctive sense of sacredness for life and death?… without entity?”
Well.. without entity there is nothing to ‘prove’ and nothing to ‘gain’, just being.. it would be my beautiful Piscean Utopia.. we would live in small communities of a few hundred.. we would produce only what we can consume, and no more.. we would nurture our children in togetherness.. we would revere all that’s around us and that sustains us.. we would exchange the fruits of our labour with other communities out there, no money involved… we would accept the meaning of human ability as an ability to CONTRIBUTE to the prosperity of community as a whole, and through that each individual would prosper as well, because they would express their ability soulfully, from what comes NATURAL to them as a unique individual.. not gonna happen, is it..
Let’s have mercy on men.. Sexual energy is potent, I do not feel it as frequent as a man would, but when it comes, it is all consuming and powerful.. From that higher state of Consciousness we have to learn to accept our animal origins with grace and humility. I mean.. sex is used as a control tool. People work five days a week so that on day six and seven they could go down to that bar looking for opportunities to get laid.. why is there so much shame, secrets, denial, taboos around issues of sexuality? Why can people not OWN this part of themselves, in clear mind and appreciation of its creative potential? Orgasm itself is not superficial for me, no. It’s the drive to GET IT AT ALL COST which kills our divinity. You know… women are not without blame. Apart from the actual cases of rape… a woman ALWAYS has a say in the matter. She can channel male sexual desire towards higher ground. And is she aware of this power of hers? No.
I love being a sexual being and I honour that part of me. Even without a male. So my sexual frustrations are non existent, it’s part of loving my wholeness. I do not believe in sexual abstinence, and also in needing to get it from somewhere else.. this is my sexual honesty, owning this part of myself…
recorded song for crumpet tossing at penis on spring event.. lyrics will be added later..” get your honey on.. ” ” get your crumpet on” “ooh yeahh’ etc
What is ‘crumpet tossing at penis’?
dang it… I just had a revelation.. Neptune does NOT rule the Subconscious, it is merely AFFECTED by it. Pluto rules it, the unseen, the secretive, the one that needs to be brought out into the open… this is why Scorpio and Pisces energies are compatible… NO SEPARATION between the Subconscious and the Conscious Mind, no division as seen from the Mind’s (Mercury) eye..
astrology is not simply a symbolic representation pf psychic functions, it is a physical and spiritual mapping of the human body energies.. a mind that controls endoctrinal functions.. all both tangible and psychic simultaneously..
Fuck it.. I get it.. why it didn’t ‘feel right’… why the Mother Theresa style service by implication of Virgo/Pisces combo didn’t ring true, the inner resistance was immense… I am a true Mercury Rising.. the birth time for my recorded and physical birth differ, I was given the wrong one as I just found out.. 11th House Pisces stellium, Sun in the 10th, 12th Moon and Jupiter and 9th Venus. Aqua MC.
I never for a second considered my expression as ‘powerful’, just communicating the inner perceptions as they occurred and evolved. What transpired here was months of that unaware manifestation of Mercury/Neptune,, Mercury should ‘should’ SEE CLEARLY its own mental perceptions, undiluted by the Subconscious, bashed for years and years into submission from the Mind drugged up into the psychosis of own sensitivities.. Transcendence towards the Conscious Vision… I feel like I’ve found a pair of shoes that fit at last, it feels more ‘me’, not Virgoan reticence.. The shift from fear to love is not an easy one.. I was trying to be what is essentially not me, and the numerous difficulties in my physical life now have escalated from that.. But I feel so strangely certain to see the road ahead.. no thinking, like an instinctive pull.
The Soul vibration of a Piscean Sun is Pluto. It lends its courage and will, something the Sun in that Ego configuration lacks.. and so true acceptance of what is – becomes an active state, not a passive fuzzy indifference.. Eternity rolls out like a carpet, every day throws more and more, Puppy, dear one… eternity smells like you, tastes like you, the two are now forever locked together. You’ve gifted me with the energies I lacked, I am not sure I’ve given you back anything of value. Like the Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz ‘If I only had a heart’.. where have I been..
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pseudologia_fantastica
How to Spot a Pathological Liar
Edited by JillianC, TechFlash1, Flickety, Zareen and 22 others
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The term, “liar, liar pants on fire” takes on new meaning when dealing with a pathological liar. This person may not be completely rooted in reality, believing the lies they tell, often in an effort to remedy low self esteem. Unlike telling a few fibs here and there, or slightly exaggerating the truth once in a while, the pathological liar lies about literally every aspect of his or her life. From how much was spent on dinner last night to talking about the last time the dog was bathed, the pathological liar feels that every bit of communication has strategic meaning positioned for his or her gain.
Being lied to on a consistent basis is not only frustrating but also disrespectful to the other person. So how do you determine if you’re dealing with someone who may drop a few fibs on occasion versus a true pathological liar? A few clues and steps may help you draw a sensible conclusion.
1Understand what a pathological liar is. Basically, a pathological liar is someone who tells lies habitually, chronically and compulsively. It has simply become a way of life for this person, to make up things for a variety of reasons and eventually, the truth becomes uncomfortable while weaving whoppers feels right to them. This kind of lying tends to develop early on in life, often as a response to difficult home or school situations that seemed to resolve better if the child lied. It’s a bad habit, not a manipulative trait––this is how to differentiate a pathological liar from a sociopath who does seek to manipulate.
2Determine whether the person’s details and information comes across as consistent every time they tell a story. Find an easy, run-of-the-mill story, such as what the person had for dinner last night. They may tell you pasta and broccoli, but then may tell you and/or others that lobster and champagne was involved. Details and information will constantly change and evolve.
Compare and contrast both big and small details. From the number of people in the liar’s story to the actual storyline itself, recall what has changed and how often the details have changed in the story.
Keep tally of the cast of characters involved in the story. If, for example, suddenly the third time the story is told, the cops show up, you have to start wondering if he or she is telling the full truth.
Recall the frequency of the lies. Pathological liars will lie consistently, which is one thing you can count on––they will lie all the time. Conduct a non-scientific experiment and inquire about certain aspects of the person’s life everyday. Choose something random like what the person ate for dinner or watched on TV the evening before. Ask the person the same question throughout the day to see if it changes––play into the lie by either getting excited or showing intrigue when the person embellishes the story. Don’t give away that you’ve heard a different answer before.
3Compare stories with mutual friends of both you and the person you suspect of being a pathological liar, to determine if the story has changed or reshaped to accommodate certain personalities. Certain details may be morphed to create drama or draw attention to the liar.
Trying to pit friends/family members against each other. If the liar was involved in an argument he or she may change the details so that he or she looks better. Also, he or she may involve other parties, making up information about the other party in order to get more people on his or her side.
Trying to avoid trouble. If the liar has done something wrong, he or she will do whatever is necessary to avoid blame––that means fabricating a story and/or pinning culpability on another person.
Fabricating a lie in order to gain attention. The main goal with many pathological liars is to gain positive notoriety. From being bored to having low self esteem, the pathological liar’s goal is to look better than everyone else, so that people pay attention and worship their accomplishments.
4Consider whether the person is lying to gain attention. Part of the reason the pathological liar feels compelled to lie is because he or she may feel as though being in the spotlight has eluded them. This person feels that he or she should be the center of everyone’s universe and will do what he or she can to make it happen. Upon tasting the spotlight, it becomes self-reinforcing and the lies grow bigger each time just to keep on being the center of attention. Here are some possibilities:
Sympathy attention. The pathological liar feels that his or her problems are paramount to what everyone else is experiencing. From a paper cut to being admonished by a boss or teacher, the pathological liar runs around telling his or her story to anyone and everyone, exaggerating the details to ridiculous proportions in order to gain sympathy from anyone within earshot.
Wants to feel important. The pathological liar is the king or queen of the “one upper.” Whatever accomplishment you’ve achieved, they done it better. This person always has to feel superior to you at all times, no matter if it’s in the professional or personal arena.
Feels bored. Unfortunately, because this person’s life is not rooted in reality, he or she may become easily bored if drama is not swirling around his or her head. As a result, lies may be fabricated in order to amuse or entertain this person, which unfortunately means that other people become involved and possibly hurt as a result.
Insecurity. Low self esteem is one of the biggest reasons why people become pathological liars. Whether they consciously recognize it or not, a pathological liar feels that he or she is not important enough as they are so they must make up accomplishments or events to position themselves as worthy.
5Look to whether the person has an addiction or secret habits that are potentially harmful. Pathological lying can arise in tandem with wanting to hide an alcoholic or drug addiction, an obsession with doing something too much such as spending time online or gaming, or in relation to a medical condition such as bulimia or anorexia. Therapy, group counseling and other professional interventions are important for such people but it may help you to better understand such lying if you know about the motivation behind it.
Part of the therapy needs to address compulsive lying. A compulsive liar can be changed.
There may be other personality disorders at issue, such as narcissistic personality disorder, bipolar disorder or borderline personality disorder.
6Examine the person’s reaction when they’re busted in a lie. The worst thing that can happen to a pathological liar is to be busted for telling the lie.
Extreme defensiveness. Expect the person to become extremely defensive, doing whatever he or she can to pin blame on someone else.
Quickly fabricating another lie to cover up the original fib. The pathological liar will start the cover-up process quickly to ensure that their reputation remains in tact. This may include a bigger lie than the original fib––which may be quite apparent.
Vindictive and may seek revenge. Rage and anger may be another reaction stemming from being “outed”, so expect possible retaliation or vindictive behavior. Alternatively, they may feel upset that they have been caught in the act by someone who cares for them and have a tearful meltdown.
7Determine if the person lives in reality. The pathological liar is one who typically does not live in reality and has trouble maintaining any consistency in his or her life. Some signs include:
Wandering from job to job. He or she may not be able to hold down a job for a long amount of time due to either being busted for lying or not being able to handle day-to-day mundane tasks because of bluffing their way into the job.
Can’t hold a steady relationship. Romantic and interpersonal relationships often fail––this person will typically have a love of his or her life or a best friend for a few months and then will suddenly no longer have contact with that person. Between lies and unrealistic expectations, the pathological liar can often attract a bevy of new relationships but has trouble maintaining them.
May be estranged from family. After years of being lied to, family members may not be very supportive or close to this individual.
An individual who lies habitually will generally lose the ability to differentiate lies from reality. He or she will believe the lies to be the truth – making confronting a pathological liar on their lies nearly impossible.
Understand that you’ll never get a consistent story when you talk with a pathological liar.
“Mythomaniac”, “compulsive liar”, “habitual liar” or “chronic liar” are other names used for a pathological liar.
Keep in mind that pathological liars typically exaggerate everything they tell you so take their stories with a grain of salt.
Someone who consistently lies to you is a form of disrespect––not someone you want to trust or consider to be a true friend.
If you care about the person, remind them often that they don’t have to pretend to be perfect. Point out a few of your own awesome screw ups and failures in life.
You can encourage someone to get therapy for lying but you cannot make them. In fact, you may have a very hard time getting this person to accept that their lying is even a problem, let alone something in need of therapy.
..the beginning of Time and its end, and it’s calling and calling… existential FEELING.. why, why, why.. The spiritual explorations of mystics, philosophizing of the brightest minds, passionate sermons of preachers, prophets… all about trying to come to terms with the Ultimate – Death. Not the fear of it, but the KNOWING that we will never know the answer in this lifetime, we will not know until we cross that threshold. Meditating.. a sharp and willful separation from own mind illusions, the mind which keeps facing the QUESTION… WHAT IS AFTER? What will happen when? How significant is all of mine here on earth? WHAT IS THIS ALL ABOUT? So much easier to be a dog… Humanity spent millenia trying to answer those questions, and is nowhere near. Meditation… a self hypnosis into rearranging the Mind into a more perceptive, open state.. and enter into everyday life attempting to hold that within, the Stillness… detach… observe all with equanimity, because separation into polarities is where the suffering starts. There is no separation into ‘good’ and ‘bad’, all feels a circle of One, LIFE. One moment in time, the ‘now’, do not go further than that, and do not go back either, STAY HERE, accept all that comes up.. The Gatekeepers within own Consciousness.. And the more this so called ‘society’ moves ‘forward’, the worse it becomes, in separation from all that nurtures us in nature, a separation from our own Source, the human, who are you? the ‘soft living’ which kills the Spirit, the beautiful immediacy of death, its reverence and what it truly means TO BE ALIVE, THIS VERY SECOND – gone, bloody GONE, lost in bickering over which movie to watch and what meal to have, going ‘hunting’ in supermarkets and birthing children in privately hired pools… Soft living is killing us, our animal bodies need to FEEL ALIVE, in adrenalin and fear and staring that Lion straight in the eyes.. and so what, I am smart, being stupid is not an option, it simply isn’t.. and people get compelled to know me, while saying ‘You are scary’.. why? because I say it how it is? And then inviting me places, like a wedding General, look who is here.. well, you know what? like my son says ‘You are a fluffy bunny with a battle axe’.. fuck that, I am happy, I never set myself challenges to match own level and more, but I have now.. I got a grant from the British Council, and I don’t own a thing materially that is worth anything in monetary value. In a few months I am free to run in this world ANYWHERE I WANT. And I WILL. Total focus.
Love is unconditional Acceptance.. of all there is, including who we are. Here is your Surrender, here is the Truth, here is the Joy.. without it there is NO SPACE between us and the rest, no freedom.. without it there is nothing to build upon… this Acceptance is the starting point of every choice and every action. I don’t feel guilty about being smart anymore, and I do not pull others down for not being so, all are absolutely equal in my world, always have been. And if someone gets intimidated – not my issue, I love regardless, and people need to look within themselves to see what makes them feel insecure.
My expression is intellectual. My life is instinctual. I didn’t walk thousands of miles from a Siberian town, without support – to the other side of the World, without an instinct that drove me. And I didn’t ‘kill’ while doing so. When I start ‘evaluating’, things go pear shaped, because the Mind places blocks, saying why this or that is impossible… NO. And it’s only the beginning. And I smile as I am writing this.. all the bickering is SO INSIGNIFICANT, compared to what really took place.. being BORN again, happy, sure, KNOWING that whatever happens – is never ‘wrong’. All has a meaning. Feelings – do not kill, they propel forward, if we let them do their real meaningful work, if we dance with them, softly and thoughtfully. Yeah, intellectual.. with a dash of oxytocin LOL
See you… in another life.
youtube.com/watch?v=ccZzusz3Mbc
When we leave lots of SPACE around ourselves – people want to come into it.. positive openness and fascinating PERSONALITY, yes. Charisma doesn’t hurt in the world of men either, and being spiritual is not just practical. It’s extremely attractive to… men, of all creatures.
I guess I am a woman who doesn’t believe in a conventional marriage, but in an intangible contract, day by day.. a Joy dance, love is truly painless in there.. which I really don’t have the words for.. Break that – and you are on your own, I’ve left enough behind to know.. Yet, men are afraid to not ‘own’ you. I intensely dislike being chased, it makes me want to turn around and walk away.. and being on the receiving end of it now gives me shivers. There is no value in a suffocating claim to my heart, body and soul..
Yet, I’ve committed that same crime here, phew, have to admit to that!!! Puppy, I am sorry for having tried to drag you into the drama. Freedom of Being, the best kept Secret… This is what keeps women hopelessly attracted to you.. so damn simple.. Good for you, baby:)
だからそれはまだこのブランド名を選ぶための別の有益なレベルです
The only person who truly ‘gets’ me is my son, maybe because he knows me from within. We are different, but similar. He acts as a ‘shrink’ to the assortment of people in his life. I am the same with both close to me and various semi acquaintances and even strangers.. Neither of us ask for it, it just happens. I don’t preach. I listen. Ask questions which prompt people to question themselves. Sometimes they say ‘I don’t know why I am saying this to you, I never told anyone’.. I don’t know either. I know who had a recent cancer scare, who conducts a secret affair and is desperately in love with the woman, who still grieves over the loss of brother, who has a private romance with the bottle, who has a secret body dismorphia, who is being bullied by the partner, who was sexually abused as a child, who has problems with parents, and even some dubious sex practices..
Then there are the Samaritans. Teaches a lot. People reach from all over the world. No names. Every call or e-mail are immersed in existential anxiety..
people feel trapped, unappreciated, lonely in their belief that no one else is ‘like that’ and so ‘feeling a freak’.. fearful of rejection, feeling their lives are devoid of meaning… the torture of pretense, of having to wear a mask, a ‘happy’ face towards the world and broken inside.. top managers running a
line of coke before completing that deal, to quell the terror they feel… mothers feeling guilty because lives of their children are ‘supposed’ to free them from feelings of misery – and they don’t.. men and women lost in their ambivalent sexuality and mixed emotions towards someone.. people facing demise through terminal illness and terrified of what’s coming… people dominated by their extended families… a direct access to so much human suffering… it is truly humbling, this slice of humanity, representation of our collective torment.. and the answers are THERE, like Narcissus – looking at self and not recognising, not seeing that the answers are inside, always have been..
I feel for people, but cannot change their realities for them. I can only give them a chance to talk, to put ‘meat’ on the skeleton of the issues which trouble them, and some talk like NOBODY EVER LISTENED to them in their entire life! It doesn’t drain me. It just is, how it is. People invisibly murder themselves.. each day of their lives. That’s the brutal reality, so divorced from how they were born. We are born to EXPERIENCE EVERYTHING, whichever shape and form it takes. And we – condemn our experiences through dividing them into ‘desirable’ or ‘undesirable’, not the gifts of being alive… A subconscious self denial. Separation from Self.
and this one.. Puppy seeps through every pore in me, makes a barrier between myself and those who want to know me, and I am not open to New Experiences with people until this one has worked its way through me, completely, and I am ASKING ‘Please please LEAVE ME, let me be, stop dwelling in my soul’.. always there, trying to contain it, but it comes like a wave, out of the blue, I forget to breathe and break out in gasps.. it’s futile, like saying this to MYSELF… who am I asking to leave when it’s ME, my own version of life and personality and being? My mirror? and so there are unresolved issues, it’s not over, and I desperately want to let go, nothing scares me anymore, but this last fight… that it will follow me around till the day I die. It’s like having lost a twin brother… twin souls do exist, and I’ve looked into mine here.. I don’t care what anyone says.. I’m not crazy or lost to some illusion, this is as CLEAR AS DAY to me.. it is not some imaginary idea, a gut feeling hard to shake off, has been around all this time, and this is why it is so difficult.. like having to let go of own being.. fuck, somebody said that twin soul is the most traumatic relationship experience, yes.. traumatic is saying it lightly, doesn’t even come close, so DON’T TALK TO ME ABOUT THE INTENT, don’t compare my experience to yours, you have no bloody idea until you walked in these shoes, go and meet yours and then come back to me and TELL ME HOW IT FELT, it is not about pretty talk, sex, sharing a meal, skating in the park together, not about having babies or planning where to live, not even about ‘discussing’ esoteric stuff and life.. it is about LIFE and DEATH, WHEN BOTH BECOME ONE in the other person, when your life becomes theirs, and their death becomes yours, when you step into Eternity through them, fuck, GET IT, ANYONE??
Piscean women are a mixture of stern and friendly detachment on the outside, you’d never know about the inner explosions by just looking at them… Like Sleeping Beauties… a spell cast on their souls, it only lifts from when the moment strikes, they see a twin, and the curse is lifted. They begin to feel – on a personal level, away from this identification with the rest of Humanity, the sacred understanding of our universal ‘sameness’…This identification with the energies that run through others – is hard to handle. But yes, love at a distance… I practiced that for the last ten years, because personal love, in the way it is out there – brings trouble, no match to the depth of the feeling, you know, don’t you, The Twin..
I KNOW without a shadow of a doubt what has been experienced, this is no ordinary thing and should not be taken lightly. There was and is NOTHING shallow about it, acceptance of this intense connection and the questions.. what am I doing to DO with this experience? Brother, it must have been strange to look into your former self…
I shared the ‘who’. An endless stream here, like at last there was an ocean to dive into.. from years of being silent, where no one wanted to go deep with me.. so I forgot how, yes. I will stop now. The love – never will. It is bigger than me. The Lunar Eclipse is coming, life is changing, there are steps, tangible steps, day by day, to what will be.
I never ‘pray’ and never asked before.. and I am asking The Greater Power to protect you… in everything you do, want, encounter.. no matter what is or will be.. I am asking God to be with you, always.
Can you post the link? I could not open it as shockwave crashed …
sure Gatubela http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7wqfcwgT0Ds
http://www.yourjewishnews.com/2013/04/w6885.html
Male ignorance is universal.;)
What did these moral champions of society really expect her to submit to?
LoL…hmmmm…huge chioce here…submit to …”this” or take the punishment.
If in the Western world, if a group of males tore off a woman’s clothes in a public environment, right down to her pink nakedness, they would be prosecuted and looking at 3 to 8 years in prison. The culture in Kenya applauds those deeds. Because it’s not so much a question of their rabid and dogmatic, blind religious beliefs…. it’s the fact that the system (government) in that African country freely allowed the abuse of males to ‘touch her’ without her consent. That’s what is comical to me,
On higher and deeper occult levels, looking specifically through the soul at those sexually fearful male behaviors, we ‘see’ that the motivations behind their fear of women IS NOT THE PERCEPTION of a woman wearing a skimpy mini skirt out in public. The lack of virtue and the blind hypocrisy manifested in those male deeds are misogynist behaviors.
Males who do everything they can through the leverage of male created and controlled laws, organizations and religions, UNCONSCIOUSLY FEAR the sexual power women hold over them. WHY??… Lack of inward self. Lack of consciousness to LOVE the spirit of humanity as opposed to loving the erection they get through their laws and beliefs. The disillusionment of Fearful sexual energies GRIPPING THEM (males) to the point (manifestation) of blatant abuse. These cowardly acts are justified in mans world, all over the world.
That sexual abuse is real because men are completely alien to the God within themselves. i.e Love and Compassion to Spirit (unseen)…. Love does not enter into their hearts or heads. Fear gives them the erection. Because the fact is unconscious males are devoured by their shadow. Shadow implies they cannot ‘see it’. So their ‘outward’ fanatical attachments and beliefs amid the tribal ego, IS BELIEVED. Thus enacted as “right”.
Blind beliefs are very powerful causes why a massive number of humans are comparable to mindless beasts. Animals. Especially with the fear riddled WITHIN THEM. Not the projections outside of them. The fear purging hatred toward people and circumstances they are terrified of understanding, due to mortal, microscopic ego infatuations That fear manifest is a chronic disease of the heart. i.e –misogynist justifications.
Blind beliefs and ritualism make humans conduct themselves in obscene and dangerous ways. They suffer in their fear (lack of consciousness) and ignorance, not clearly seeing themselves (motivations) of what love for any human eternally IS. Their blind dogmatism are vicariously absorbed in through the approval of their culture, their socioeconomic environments. I’m talking about multitudes of cultures and communities all over the world. But the fear of women is the same. See.
There is that human paradigm again linking the response to Fear or Love.
Love is alien to people who are alien of their truest self. Know thyself is immortal, because when one is receiving the power of the Source IN SOUL, not in cultural ego, one is enlightened to see and control their own fearful and conformed and impetuous acts in blindly controlling others fundamental rights.
The third world countries, or sub-industrial countries controls their people via religious tradition or conformity.
The developed countries control and utilize their citizens through the subterfuge and leverage of class (money) and social/vocational/hierarchy labels.
The point here is that the connecting thread in both if their motivations, the SOUL INTENT of compassion, self-governance and love is replaced by fear (sexual), hate, manipulation and prolific abuse.
Humans won’t see when they are psychological victims of their culture. If one is blind of their eternal self, all the zealous convictions and abusive deeds are an oxymoron when they have no sight of their intent.
A woman showing her body in a mini is an immature expression of sexuality. ..and the mental men´s reaction just means that at THAT level, she made them loose themselves. If they have the spiritual energy that you are talking about, then it would have brought them face to face with their shadow by the shear comparison of the two energies – within themselves…i.e. they would begin to truly understand what it means to be able to choose. Choice is not an option for these people – even though they feel they choose “the right path.”
Being very harsh – she, at her immature level, did not know choice either.
I am saying immature sexual energy because sexual energy is a very powerful force, and it has its levels. At its highest level, it brings transcendence and sacred knowledge. And at those levels, you will be very specific about your partner and the energy will have taught you – woman – how to carry yourself and cultivate it. With God…or with evil intent.
I truly do feel her suffering – but deeper truths about sexual energy clearly indicate that is not to be played with nor provoked. Even innocence can not protect you.
The government – as well as the cosmos, “honours” the law. One is based on truth, and the other based on “the lie”.
hmm. its a strange world we live in really. we are meant to be evolved as humans but we are more repressed than anything else. it manifests in a variety of ways.sexuality in men and women has become totally weird in looked at from what society presents it as a whole.. in forms of media, fashion tv and technological communication.culture has eaten itself. men , before religion and language gave birth to ideas of separation, were essentially naked and roamed and had sex.there was no shame . no notion of rape.no questioning identity.no hiding erections. probably alot more free than how things are these days. And women didnt wear provocative clothing. they wore nothing. maybe they were both covered in fur..why they lost the fur.. maybe we will never know..
but its like there are remnants that float around that dont want to escape.. connection with something that was taken away and occaisionally re -enacted but with risk and knowledge of it being wrongly perceived so it is skewed.
This doesn’t really have to do with the topic at hand, but I wanna ask if you know where I could find a decent captcha plugin that I can implement on my blog?? I’m using the
same blog system as yours and I’m having difficulty locating one?
A woman showing flesh is not an expression of sexuality, mature or not. It is a subconscious want to press a male’s buttons… Real sexuality is very subtle, non verbal and non tangible clues, like an invisible scent.. hmmm.. to do with ease of conduct. Very few truly sexually exciting men and women, not to do with the way they look or dress. There is a quality of freedom to it, like a potent aura around a person, cannot be ‘learned’ or ‘acquired’.
Men do not really understand a female body, do they.. they sense the potential for ‘good sex’, but sensuality is not in their lexicon, a sad ‘race’ to orgasm really. Too many badly executed movie love scenes playing in their heads.
Last night between 3 and 4 in the morning.. it was connected to you, Puppy. Don’t know what happened, but felt this intense mood, and not mine.. Your Moon is in my 8th house you see.. past life karmic connection.. I feel the changes in your mood states, IF they are powerful enough, craaaaaazy!
Creative EXPERIENCING of life is..well, bloody exhausting! Got to love it LOL
Yes, it is sexuality…
She clearly identified herself as a woman (gender), through her expression. We dont know her sexual orientation, but she definitely has done. If she wanted to press someone´s buttons, then she is expressing herself. But I won´t presume that she was heterosexual here.
And we know that what happened to her, will clearly affect her capacity to have erotic experiences and responses. Her whole life has changed, as what could have been intimacy or even friendship with a man, will now be met with fear and resistance, as her crime of “button pushing” was met with degradation, violence and humiliation.
She wont care about any of the things you mention – not for a long time. Because it will bring her back to the scene of”her” crime.
The militant projections of her subconscious mind will sabotage it.. circulating through veins and arteries, it happens to millions daily…
Look into a man’s eyes, ANY man, no matter how soft or macho, successful or not… we don’t look deep enough… there is an unspoken request to a woman- for RELEASE.. A release which will allow him to be his best glorious self, a release from the Martian energy; they all need a rest from the hammering effects of it, no matter how successfully they’ve negotiated it in their life.. a female energy holds the key.
‘Need’ and ‘want’ have distinctly different flavours. Without wanting there is no creative passion, no forward movement.
Wanting nothing equals colourless death. I WANT to want.
90 % of the time in our social existence… Women compete with other women, girls always glance and stare at other girls in terms of her looks (fashion sense) her cuteness and her sexuality.
Guys just get caught up in female crossfire… such as the proverbial testy drama, which is really a woman’s innocent tests, those tests subconsciously HELP HER FEEL if he’s sure and balanced with his identity and outlook on life. Girls are testing males all their lives, constantly, way back since they were little munchkins.
Iv’e dated over 150 women in my life, and I’ve associated with thousands of girls on platonic levels. From this experience, I know women love “to play”… meaning they kiss each other, share intimate discussions, do things together, they giggle at the social dumbness of guys, and women assimilate other women as magical, alluring creatures. Thus their fierce and moody jealousies.
My point is Gatubela, I believe 90% of all heterosexual women would kiss, caress, shop, cuddle, and get naked with each other and feel very OK with it. The reason women think nothing of “play” with another woman, is because women (girls) by their very nature deeply want affection, touch and intimacy, so they can have fun and experience the scrumptious energy of Venus. Because most of these girls lives are not getting that critical affection and emotional wisdom from men (seed) all their lives.
Women are literally the symbol of Venus remember (and the Moon). Venus is all experiences which cultivate gentle, pure, soft, luscious, delicious, attractive and sensual PLEASURES. Thus Venus is love. Thus love is Girl (woman). Their very nature.
In comparison, males who ‘play’ with other males like the description above are as gay as daylight.
Their “Mars force” is subdued socially and sexually relative to the opposite sex (women), which is why women feel safe on many levels with gayness.
Gay essentially means “happy”. Which is not a crime.
Happy means Spirit. Yet the massive social herd perception only understands ‘the superficial’. This includes a majority of gays btw.
My natal Sun (father identity – in 9th house of higher mind)…my natal Venus (women’s psyche in 9th house of higher mind)… and my natal Moon (mother nurturing in 11th house public/collective consciousness) are in fascinating Sextile with each other.
Astrologically this means my Sun is conjunct Venus – Sextile Moon, MEANING I was blessed with an inner male and female balance and perception of humanity, now seen through the spiritual lens of the Eagle. The Source bestowed me an understanding of societal and sexual patterns throughout the matrix of male and female psyche and sexuality, far deeper and more profound than your latest issue of US Magazine sitting at your local grocery store.
Spank you very much;)
My spiritual nature was born with a friendly inner relationship with the anima and animus with both my-inner-self and society at large.
However… hahaha, in terms of my volcanic Mars and friends in Scorpio and the 8th house of sex, death and transformation… my inner life has not been “balanced”. Pluto in my 7th house has been teaching balance of my inner drives and harmonizing them with the necessary superficial needs of the material world.
It’s quite an inner conflict must use for the greater good. I’ve learned it can take much out of me to allow a woman in this close. It’s been easy here from my laptop, but the music of death (feeling of transformation) is too scary for both me and love interest to face. This is my burden alone. But I would never have risen from the dead if I was not born with this NATURAL conflict.
In hindsight to my past lives… I’d probably be rapping you right now a Kanye West rhyme or something just to feel accepted and special. hahaha.
‘rapping Kanye West’.. there are many ways of losing one’s identity when in the throes of love fever.. given away inch by inch, it doesn’t take much out, it takes ALL out. I’ve done that.
I feel that a lot of things I’ve said to you – stand true. Yes, it made you mad, because you want the choice of being able to say it in your own time. But you are revealing them slowly, AS IS NOW. Behind the laptop, yes… what happens in physical life? Will she ever know?
For me personally… this is what I always wanted here… the Truth of your Now. And I will always be direct about it, can’t do it any other way.
Remember… no man is God, but admiration and love makes him close to being one. It’s a delicate and complex balance.
Hi Pluto Puppy:)
how are you? I hope you are keeping warm on this cold morning.
Why is the feeling of transformation too scary for you both? What does that transformation mean for the two of you?Have you already felt it together and what did it feel like?
Umm
They want you to lie.
They want you to match the ‘person specification’ sheet. They want you to tell them how you will ‘fit’ within the organisation. They want to know that you
will accept every ridiculous rule in existence, those rules which have no common sense… the basic tenet of organic human sustainability – COMMON SENSE. Which says that if a rule causes people to behave unnaturally – it has to be scrapped. That equality and diversity is not in asking people about their sexual orientation, marital status, religion and the name of their father. That when a person in charge knows your ability to deliver and WANTS to give you the job – they don’t have to ‘play by the rules’ and go through reems of paper, to see if all ‘relevant’ boxes are checked.
Would Beethoven have had written his Moonlight Sonata bound by the ‘rules’ of music composition of his time? Would we have had relativity theory if Einstein had lived now and failed (as he did) his entry exams, being the rebel and resenting the contemporary educational methods (not much changed since)?
Give them a rosy picture of your ‘greatness’ and ‘suitability’. Tell them how they simply cannot survive without your talents and abilities. Do not mention
the REAL MOTIVATION why you considered it.They don’t want to know you applied because your heart is singing when you do it, and you are not prepared to count the coins it will bring you, just that overwhelming sense of doing what you were meant to do. The meaningless structures that people erected for fear of not TRUSTING themselves, their own common sense, their ability to KNOW right from wrong, their feeble attempts at HIDING behind that which serves no one, but the top dog…
Give them what they want? And accept that your chances are considerably lowered by having done that? NOT EVERYBODY MANIPULATES THE SYSTEMS to benefit own immediate goals, do you hear that????
The Universe is ruled by relativity law, through the pure omnipotent language of mathematics. It’s simple: all is black or white, yes or no, Dark or Light, 1 or 0, the presence and the absence of RELATIONAL LINKS between objects. Objects (that includes feelings, people, rocks, crocodiles and sub-atomic particles) are only defined IN THEIR RELATION TO ONE ANOTHER, the principle of interconnectedness comes into full force here. Everything is a chain of relative interactions, within which the truth of the moment comes to be, whether it’s a heated human exchange or a leaf fallen on your shoulder.. . From atoms to people to galaxies, sustainability of the system lies in the number of PROBABILITIES, in which it may exist, and the higher the entropy – the more stable the system. The universal law of nature – all tends to chaos, an ORGANISED CHAOS. Relational systems… the higher the entropy number – the higher the probabilites, here is your law of diversity… the most beautiful and unchallenged law – more probabilities CREATE STABLE SYSTEMS which become ONE system… yet, people make them fucking ABSOLUTE RULES, by LIMITING the probabilities numbers in their short lifespan here in this world…. Einstein understood the Universal Law.
My thoughts on the matter. Felt and channeled through me, no books involved.
yup. scientists just label it as quantum physics and many people are shocked at how amazing and ” new ” and ” revolutionary” it all is.nothing new in it or it wouldnt even be understood.
Ah. The ignorance of the ‘amazed’…
Yes, science has been around for generations, because it’s not a special ‘new’ field of knowledge, but a METHOD, a mere tool, like money… Technological development is always progressive by nature. It’s driven by two very basic human qualities – CURIOUSITY and IMAGINATION. People who ask themselves ‘Why? What if I put this and that together; what will happen?’ Progressive scientists are highly creative people who are aware of transient nature of all knowledge and do not hold on to own theories tightly; they are not driven by Ego.. People who notice patterns behind mundane details (yeah, scientific method is extremely mundane and repetitive).
But. When we forget to ask ourselves – to what ends, how does this fit in with a bigger picture… then things become a little bit hazy. Someone had to invent the wheel, wheels do not happen in nature, right? Elimination of physical hardship has become the focus of human survival. Like any tool – science is abused daily.. The bubble will burst, the fad has been just a few centuries in the making, nothing compared to the age of civilization. The Binary Universe demands Balance.
I once knew a Russian astrophysicist Gregory who was invited to work on a project in the UK.. We camped together on the banks of Pentney Lake in Norfolk, campfires, guitars, a big group… He said ‘The more I learn about the Universe, the more I see that explanations fade in the face of it.’
btw.. who’s “they” ? (“they want..”etc)
They… basically, any organisation under the Sun.
I’m lucky in my ability to meet the key holders and form PERSONAL connections. When I say ‘personal’ it means that regardless of how ‘important’ they are out there in the material world – the nature of the association becomes essentially ‘human to human’, not a ‘human number to another human number’… Look straight in the eye and hold the gaze.. smile… and don’t hide, even when it means you do not portrait yourself is ‘mighty’. Only real, with all the inherent human fallibility and strengths.. A man will usually get quite alert (curiosity), a woman will become relaxed (no competition).. I don’t plan it, it just happens this way.
However, every organisation has rules which is a tricky part for me personally, because I instantly see their inbuilt redundancy.
A balance between negotiating those and own inner convictions is not easy for me to achieve. Sometimes it makes me cry because it feels like a betrayal of self. I understand it not always is, just my inbuilt perception of any form of societal authority as oppressing.
I guess an ability to see past a person’s vulnerabilities to their inner impeccable core – helps. But they don’t see their core, and that’s a problem.
i dont know what context this is in..? someone you know and are interacting with?
maybe thats where its helpful to then let go.. and understand that we are all on our own paths.. and no matter what you perceive to be their core and their unwillingness to see it, that at some point it is out of your control..well it is anyway..i know what it is like to divert all your energy outwards to the point of unbalance.. where there is none to take care of yourself.. whereby you become depleted and frustrated.. and then resentful when nobody seems to get it, or understand what you are thinking/feeling/intuiting. at this point.. its the wake up call!
Interacting with SYSTEMS, not individuals… individual interactions in my physical world are very easy and effortless for me.
Once a patient in a neuro centre was mishandled, and she became visibly ill, getting worse as the days progressed.. and PEOPLE THOUGHT SHE WAS FAKING IT, BECAUSE she had a history of ‘disobedience’, the fucking projections of people without looking at the situation AS IT WAS AT THAT MOMENT IN TIME. I had to march into the Manager’s office and ask for the doctor to examine her. The doctor came in and, with a sneering authority, said she was fine. She was in agony!! Days later – she was even worse. Again, the Manager’s office, and this time I didn’t mix words. She was taken to the hospital and voila! her leg was BROKEN, through staff FORCING her to do what she was unable to.. how does one let go AT THIS PHYSICAL LEVEL? It’s not something fantastical and imaginary swimming in one’s head, it becomes negligence towards the vulnerable.
People REPRESENT systems. Or – they BELIEVE they do, ha. There is a great disparity between a human and his/her conduct when they act as representative entities for something else.
Respecting the authority of an individual (if earned) is much more important for me than respecting an authority of the post they represent. Individual authority comes from within, the principles, as opposed to rules.
yeah.. theres alot of negligence in hospitals and lack of staff and bad treatment of staff and lack of training.. its crap. i wish more kids were taught at school how to be healthy and natural cures for things etc. in other cultures its passed down from generation to generation.. but many westerners are so clueless and reliant on western medicine. A broken leg is a broken leg . amazing they didnt figure it out and respond appropriately. I think its great that you made a point to them.good work
A park, trimmed grass, all looks vibrant and very green…. a very blond boy, around 8. He is dressed in three quarter length pants (what are they called?).. a girl, a few years older, slim, mid brown longish hair.. she is acting as a gatekeeper, and he is trying to kick the ball….
They seem related, but I don’t know how, there’s not much resemblance in their features… he looks focused and serious, but happy, and she seems encouraging..
It’s a repeating dream.
an experience from when you were young?
No.
First time I dreamed about that boy ten months ago, he was a toddler in the playground.. my son was dead in that dream.. then this scene from the park started around three months ago, and him again, but older.. it’s not my memory.
.. that hospital was part of a big chain of Australian hospitals, expanded in the UK.
There are no natural cures when your car smashed into the bridge at 70mph.. or when you have a motor neuron disease and KNOW you will die from suffocation, because the muscles that expand and contract lungs – will one day cease.. or when you had a stroke and cannot talk or walk anymore (and it’s far from an old age occurrence).. hundreds of reasons and one outcome…
It’s all very sad, Umm. Once you’ve worked in a place like that – it changes you forever.
Yes i can imagine… i have a couple of friends who have been nurses.. i think it was a very overwhelming job at times. Neither of them are doing it anymore, at least not as much. i found out recently a friend of a family member has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and has 6 months to live.she is only in her 50’s and very vibrant, energetic woman. really sad.
‘Memento mori’… if we do not truly FEEL Death – we cannot live the Life.
Have you ever observed the treetops in the wind? Sometimes even in the wind the branches of one tree remain still for a few moments, while all nearby is swirling in the dance.. then the tree picks up the message and begins to flow within the space.. trees exchanging messages through the wind, it’s fascinating to watch.
Go out there, sit down and watch it. Trees communicate to one another, carrying the unheard (by us) stories through the airwaves… it’s just that we don’t understand the language.
“Why is the feeling of transformation too scary”
Because moving from ‘I’ to ‘We’ is not negotiated with an eye on eternity in this world.. individuals, with their world views, histories, perceptions – merge into ‘Us’… is bound to shake to the core, of all that has been prior, boundaries are constantly redefined in this never ending process, and THAT is a heck of a lot of energy consumption.
There is a saying in Russian ‘Went through fire, water and brass pipes’ meaning – anything has a potential to break us, from the heat of passion to the gloom of misery to the heights of fame and fortune.. YOU ARE TO HELL AND BACK. The wisdom of alchemical blending is in relinquishing all identifiable parts of selves – sexuality, personas, pretty collections of opinions and ball gowns.. yet, remaining connected to our inner being throughout – the elements transcend and blend into gold… hmmm. hopefully.
Few people can genuinely enter this and WALK ALL THE WAY, you can bet the opposites will wack you full force! Two universes colliding, right? Polytheistic (archetypal) Gods becoming Oneness.
We are not talking about merging the CD collections here.
Or.. we can do just that. Easy and lifeless.
Hi Ines and P.Puppy,
Being accepted on a “play” level, is the most easiest thing for a man to do! But its not acceptance really – it actually flat out negation and rejection. Play does not have the capacity to see a man´s light and instinctively know what it takes in order to obtain it.
For example, Buddha. The idea of transcendence and Nirvana. What does it take for a man to reach this state of being, if he does not have love in his heart?
Scorpionic bonding is not easily understood by women, because they fail to love the man, and get distracted by the intensity. Can a woman, truly empathize with a man´s path, once she actually knows it? Does she have what it takes, to stick to his light under his passionate penetration?
In Chinese medicine, they talk of the eternal soul – which they define as our core being. The core being is defined as being connected to the divine. There are stages as well – the heart being your destiny. There are points on the body, that help a patient become in tune with the divine.
According to the Chinese, in order to grow, you have to pass through “po”. These are 7 spirits that actually represent spiritual tests and resistance.
Its so precise, that they know the points on the body that had to be dealt with in order to activate this “path” in a person. These po are actually the most soul shattering emotions meant to strike terror and fear in every atom in you – or incredible extreme states of negativity.
They attribute the earth element to have the power to transform. Because earth is controlled by water, generates metal (scorpio’s domain) and is fathered by fire (will, war).
Yin (dark) and Yang (light), if not seen in terms of wholeness, causes a division in the psyche. So, the eternal soul requires “wholeness” in order to manifest itself. So…if you are seeing the “core” of a person, you have seen the divine idea of “wholeness”.
So…dualism…”play” and its opposite – which is—? It’s a pathway actually and women many times, do not walk it.
Nice to hear from you, Gatubela.
Just HOW does a woman come to see his path? Without this labour of soul it leaves her bewildered, the lessons lost on her..
It made me think of Scorp No.2 (Mars Scorpio).. what set him apart from all other Scorpios I’ve known – his most DIRECT expression, which was so liberating.. Intensity was not an issue, he said ‘a kindred Spirit, you are just like me’.. but when a man places his considerable energy into a search for a ‘soul mate’.. what does it say about his priorities? It didn’t FEEL right to me. I wasn’t sure why except that I value the EXPERIENCE, and believe that if we are truly invested in the journey – the destination will take care of itself.. and of course, I was fool enough to try and ‘prove’ to him that the journey was worth it… with all my inherent intensity LOL
He was honest and.. kind, you know… bloody KIND underneath the air of danger that he emitted.. and I wasn’t. He said ‘You will never be a victim again after this’, but it took your and Puppy’s wisdom to see the true nature of ‘victimhood’.
In hindsight.. he was GETTING THERE, a slow realisation of his own capacity to regenerate prompted by loss of his love. I had valid hunches, those unexplained flashes of inner knowing, but didn’t understand his abyss, because I hadn’t gone through mine. When Puppy once referred to him as a ‘pickup artist’… it wasn’t entirely accurate. He was a ‘man on a mission’, it’s just that he didn’t choose a true mission.
So yes, ‘play’ (dishonesty) devalues both and reduces them to steaks… But if we are absolutely CLEAR about WHAT WE WANT from any involvement, with no games around expectations.. then IT’S NOT A PLAY ANYMORE. People do not always seek the Light (love), it’s the reality. As long as they are honest about it – I have no problem with this. Paradoxically, laxity in the way men and women approach own relationships – allows humans to carry on as species. Life doesn’t care if it comes about from play or love.
I feel that wholeness is kind of a human concept, consisting of millions of integrated world fragments.. Soul is One, indivisible, I can only go by that bliss opening and how it felt. There were no fragments in there, it just WAS *sigh*
It would take a very special kind of man for me to feel that I want to invest my energy on that level. I am realistic, in that I need a lot of alone time and someone intuitive to allow that. My son is the same. We have periods of intense emotional interaction talking about stuff, followed by separation. It doesn’t have to be a physical absence either, we even managed that well in France, while sharing the tent and being there 24/7.
Love your new colour, btw
“..For example, Buddha. The idea of transcendence and Nirvana. What does it take for a man to reach this state of being, if he does not have love in his heart?..”
So true Gatubela. Love is suppressed and not freely ‘allowed’ in our vocational society for a reason. It is the mortal reasoning itself which is corrupt. But what is also true is that the societal conditioning of “career” is perceived in the realm of limitation AS REAL AND TRUE. As if we were physical microbes scratching out a fleeting life without Eternal Law. That’s the illusion Saturn is within us thanks to it’s limited logic of life itself.
There is no heart energy within that prosaic state of unimaginative, mechanical energy. The life of us, our core happiness is sucked out. That affect is the power of illusory acceptance by mans devices and rules. His “institution”.
Limitation = The physical societal oppression of Saturn (Satan) which = Mans World. The corporate boxes of what is “accepted”. Those man-made intellectual boxes are sectarian states of rule, the abusive mind and emotion authority shared among it’s constituents. The organizations institutionalized yes-men and yes-women. Again, this strict collective obedience stems from fears swelling within that institution. Fear that a person (employee) will be betrayed and denied of their means to survive. It’s important to understand that Saturn’s authority values only, and my mean only, values it’s corporate bottom line. Not the humans producing that bottom line.
Neptune initiation in the herd pysche has not breached consciousness into self-transcendence, that is transcendent perception and feeling of other worlds past the rings (monotony, prosaic drudgery) of Saturn.
Man’s corporate world oppresses it’s people. Again, Saturn and it’s proverbial rings represents mans perception of Order Rules Law Obedience Structure and Conformed Belief.
Remember our little discussion about Braveheart the movie? … Well… that story shows us Saturn oppression demonstrated right there. Saturn wanted to negate the freedoms of immortality and of a power (Braveheart the man, Uranus/Aqaurius) TO CHANGE THE KARMA of repeated rape theft and murder of their people. You see… Saturn (oppressive authority) really loves the status-quo of daily structure. It feels threatened (afraid) when “an Unknown” power penetrates (Pluto) it’s boundary. While The Rebellion of Braveheart shattered THE SELF-IMPORTANCE of that tyrannical authority.
So divinity in ones consciousness is a holistic integration of both Saturn and Neptune. Bringing “the Dream” (Neptune) down to earth (Saturn). All planets actually. And all signs too.
Neptune spiritual necessity functioning amid the herd prosaic Saturnine psyche, has not breached consciousness into self-transcendence, that is the transcendent perceptions and feeling of other worlds (imagination) past the rings (monotony, prosaic drudgery) of Saturn law and order.
Saturn mostly dominates the human “ambition” through any deceitful means necessary by manipulation the system, a system invented of mans greedy world. Now Neptune’s oceanic and highly potent mass-consciousness drowns itself in the oppression caused by that Saturnine mortality via escapes into alcohol, drugs, scheming others for strict personal gain and self-pity. So mental illness, despair and self-delusion is Neptune’s darkside.
Neptune divinity within human beings is not active, but rather suppressed and squelched by the collective perception on the egocentric plane of survival. Faith is rendered futile in that pain and despair. Neptune, Pluto, Uranus are only mastered in a person when one can see the invisible karma (Saturn) of his/her life choices, events and circumstances… and then to connect those experiences all together within the soul finding eternal meaning in ones – existence.
I feel I understand a bit of what you are saying.
The eternal meaning, is like points (perceived initially as intangible choices but feel like energetic stability) where heaven (light in the dark) meets earth in our physical lives, and living from that point, amid the infinite possibilities that are around us, brings us closer to the Source of who we are…
Or something like that…
It does not make sense that soul is “one” under the context of Bliss. But you can keep on “sighing” . Everyone is feeling bliss during orgasm…or a good meal…or watching rainbows and being in nature. Even God knows what theDevil is doing – and vice versa. It comes down to your choices – with love being the guide. “want” won´t exist in this scenario. Because everything is already so fucked up, healing won´t be anything less than destruction.
You invest your energy because it is how life should be lived. It just means that you are a phoney on one level and bloody conditional on the other.
Play is not dishonesty for me – because being honest these days can get you killed. LoL…And I have good reasons to stay alive. And being victim is a fact of my life, because of the fact unity is something that people will never “BE”…What I strive to do, is not victimize people myself.
What do you get with that noble act? Well….more aggressive action and victimization by the “honest people”.
Honesty is not what comes out of your mouth, but what you manifest with your soul. Its energetic- That is way “want” does not exist.
The division assures these levels of lying – and although there are many levels of reasons, the basic one is that people don´t chose spiritual growth.
The reason I wrote the Chinese philosophy is that for them, it can be as simple as putting in a needle in order to people to face their demons. For certain natives, it can be started by initiation and ceremonial practices during “manhood”.
For the average “dude and dudette” in occidental societies….I believe initiaion starts at MacDonalds and when you first get laid.
I love colours too…but the truth is, the writing in that email space is so slow, that it closed on me many times before I posting, due to the fact that the forum is hard to write in now. Many times, I don´t finish the email correctly.
Bliss in an orgasm, a good movie and nature? Not my experience. We are talking about two completely different states, because NONE of those are. Forget about the word ‘bliss’, there is no word to describe it, and NO external circumstance attached. It was something.. not quite of this world, so preciously rare.. Unless you are in that permanent state, and any of the things you mentioned always feel like that to you?
There is no need for a needle initiation process, what is that, a controlled way of entering Hell? I wouldn’t teach kids to deal with negativity by sticking needles into the adrenal gland… I’d teach them to overcome that when someone has ‘stolen their toys’ (loss in many forms), something they will have to face every day,through RELATIONAL LINKS WITH OTHERS.
All the suffering that I’ve ever unleashed upon myself and others – took place because at some point in the past I CHOSE the actions that took me on that path. There is nobody else I can hold responsible, but myself. And those which were ‘chosen’ for me, such as rape.. well.. people find different ways of nurturing themselves, and looking back on and choosing to PERMANENTLY RESIDE there is not part of my intrinsic NATURE.
Energetically.. not victimizing others is not enough. Not giving others opportunities to victimize US also comes into play, or else we create conditions for others to step into the abusive circle and play that role… I understand that sometimes our choices are limited, but I know with certainty.. IF any violation was forced upon myself… they can have my body, the shell, to the point of death… but they cannot have ME. Like that child – something within us is simply untouchable. I hope that all those plucked ‘initiated’ flowers will know that one day, and then the FEELING of being a victim will simply cease to be, regardless of the facts.
There is pain in many of your writings.
I was just explaining that cultures have sprirituality using their own symbols.
Yes…I do imagine how Jesus felt – that guy was murdered – after being tortured at a young age. His “bliss” (your word and not mine) is what got him killed. But it was not what would have kept him alive. And what made him do what he did, was something else completely alien to you.
Feeling Samadhi – lol…
It won´t get you into heaven.
It’s OK, Gatubela. Truly.
Something has just made talking redundant.. that’s not what love is.
What I know – is enough.
I hope your path will take you where you are going, with all my love.
Look Ines,
You have felt what love is for you….but you don´t have to include “me” in your definition.
You can´t talk a marathon in the forum…and then say “its redundant”. If it were truly redundant to you, you would not have written. But you did. Your intellectualism fails you so you have to do what (?) with those words?
If you have felt redundancy now then you have “chosen” the redundant path (past) when you started writing according to your quantum relationship physics? I say, by your fruits, shall you be known.
What does that make you ..while talking to me..superimposed by time and with an infinite amount of outcomes? By your very first choice, the future was written. But hey…I am used to those fucking slaps in the face every day now. Right now, your choices are manifesting in your life at an exponential amount.
Under these circumstances, you can wish me all the “redundant” love you want.
Damn rights we are on different paths.
I didn’t say IT IS redundant. I said something HAS JUST MADE TALKING redundant. If you cannot see the difference, then you are not really listening.
And you are not.
..as I said there is a lot of pain in what you write, and so in you.. ‘those fucking slaps’.. are not from me.
Well…actually they are.
You use redundancy as a tool to react, instead of using your understanding of pain to give.
You have the gift of perceiving pain (hahaha!) and are studying psychology. This is a classic beauty.
What good has it done, when in essence, it is not really you?
I wonder how it can be, that what you know about love is enough, while still being reactionary and dismissive.
So yes, I do feel pain, but especially when feeling people who “defend” helpless people (that lady with a broken leg), and all of your psycho bla bla bla, with no real intention of compassionate use of understanding in your life.
You probably psychologically kick people´s asses too, in real life. Helpless and defensive people better not get into a fight with you.
On bliss… there is a word for it – samadhi. This is probably the closest, and it was written WHILE in that state of being (not by me):
Vanish the grosser lights into eternal rays
Of all-pervading bliss.
From joy I came, for joy I live, in sacred joy I melt.
Ocean of mind, I drink all creation’s waves.
Four veils of solid, liquid, vapor, light,
Lift aright.
Myself, in everything, enters the Great Myself.
Gone forever, fitful, flickering shadows of mortal memory.
Spotless is my mental sky, below, ahead, and high above.
Eternity and I, one united ray.
A tiny bubble of laughter, I
Am become the Sea of Mirth Itself.
Mine was a couple of minutes. You can imagine what Jesus or Buddha went through.
I am not chasing it. But it’s like Ariadne’s thread for me. I cannot explain it.
“The sacred geometry of chance”
Yes. Untouchable.
youtube.com/watch?v=ZuI61cTNbAk
I’m not ‘doing’ psychology, in fact, something completely different..
But psychologically.. when something is triggered in people, some wounds.. they tend to go into an ‘attack’ mode.. which is what you are doing right now.
Transference is a very real (subconscious) state, Carl Jung devoted the whole book to it. I’ve heard that in therapy people often get really mad AT the therapist, before settling into the real issues. The therapist has nothing to do with the issues that plague people, but there you go.. The chance to get ‘mad’ is important, because it is not culturally ‘accepted’ out there, and people do not know HOW to deal with it, never learned, apart from mindlessly going through the motion..
On an energetic level.. the same energies, when manifest through interaction – will lead to – repulsion and an outburst. That’s the nature of negativity.
You are right in saying that pain is not really me, although I perceive it from others.. and of course feel my own. But people need other types of energy to deal with their own states. While Scorpionic energy is transforming from pain, Piscean is essentially about hope. It is usually in quite extreme circumstances.. when a person already has the noose over their neck – they are not interested in transformation AT THAT POINT IN TIME. Sure, we can observe and say ‘Look at your Darkness.. What have you contributed to your own pain?’ But that will simply push them over the edge. They NEED to step away from it first, you see?
You’ve made a lot of assumptions about my life. I’ll leave that one with you.
No…that is not the nature of negativity – because you are talking only from your level of perception and what you read in books. Its ridiculous that you quote Carl Jung…and use your interesting theories in order to respond.
Pain …for any kind of healing must be addressed. People in pain are not idiots you know. They already know that hope..did not exist for them at “that” moment. Just like Jesus being crucified…when it happened, he fucking knew. It is scorpio´s domain – because of the incredible understanding and not objectification of their experiences.
And just what do you think you are leaving with me?
Christ energy is not Scorpionic in nature, far from it…
Gatubela, I wrote this last year, it was prompted by the feeling from you.
Whispering curses fall from your broken lips
In the twilight of past memory and tomorrow.
Your hearts simmer and shift and many a beat skip.
The blaming game, blame for humanity that you borrow.
That terrible something happened way back in time,
But the mind vulture circles it, grasping and stubborn.
Before now your pain has never been mine,
So you moved it in, like a skeleton cupboard
Never opened, and the wounds never healed,
Damaged people bleeding on with no repair…
Let me step into the Darkness, so I could feel
The suffocating void of your eternal despair.
Damaged people flocking together to feed
In spaceless and grim corridors of entangled minds,
No light switches to flip and an unspoken need
To breathe in the sunshine and leave the prison behind.
Your pointing finger traces the route in my soul’s map.
And every gesture today triples your yesterday’s pain.
The Great Canyon of suffering stops you from crossing the gap,
And you stab yourselves in your hearts, again and again…
———–
I’m not sure you realise just how strongly it comes across here. Which is OK, but keeping yourself and others in there – is not.
Yes, pain must be addressed… So what I am leaving with you.. depends on what you choose to pick up.
You only need to look at the shadow Christ cast upon the world when he died, in order to understand what his light was.
It is not me who is keeping people under pain, as much as what you stand for does.
You can fucking write a sonnet if you want, on that.
I know it was harsh, Gatubela… and it hurt me just as much to say it. But it had to be said.
..human energies are VERY REAL, each has their own unique, very physical (psychic) signature.. some are heavy and dark, some are uplifting, some want you to dance, some send tears… INCLUDING OUR OWN. We take all in, but choose those which are nurturing in the long run, because as short as this life is, there are years of BEING, and being immersed in… what? Hope? Light? Love? What do we send out there? And when this doesn’t come back… do we call it ‘slaps in the face’? No. It’s LIFE.
Without an ability to imagine (Neptune) our life as full, without an ability to clear the way for Light (Pluto), without a real belief in own abilities to live this life IN JOY (The Sun) we’ll remain chained to own misery and the misery of others. And Neptune energies AT THE CORE are very childlike. That’s where the Light comes from. That’s Christ.
I love you, Gatubela, I really do.. and you know what… you don’t even have to love me back. And that’s the beauty of it… not expecting a ‘return’ from anything. The true nature of peace.
..it was a few heavy days, something’s been churning.
I don´t really feel you know what harsh is, Ines.
And I ain´t feeling the love. There is nothing to give back, since the slap in the face that I feel is your insincerity and your blown up concept of your own knowledge.
LoL…sounds like you are lillying me.
That hypnotic bullshit and bad use of your own energies, is not to be used in order to convince people that they need help or that you are right. Although for some idiots, it works pretty well. And the power surge that it gives you is not bad either, isn´t it?
I expect more of the same from you, no matter how much poems your write, you sure as hell are not going to get your war booties dirty by …oooops….humility?
I know that eveything thinks that we have to “escape” misery and all of that nirvanic bla bla bla…and feel christ child energy.
But if you can look at the face of a suffering person, while in these supposedly transcendental states – as per your crapola, then you are one cold hearted bitch.
I stated what I’ve been feeling from you for a long time. If you’ve felt powerless.. you can ask yourself why, because I don’t feel any ‘power’.
Sometimes there is more humility in simply letting people be as they are. THAT is not something you will know.
The ‘war’ is your projection, as this is what you are feeling now. A suffering person sees everything as ‘lack’, it’s THAT dark in there.
You seem to love your own misery.. and are asking me to feed into it. The answer is ‘no’.
This exchange is over.
The exchange was over as soon as you wrote the first word.
It was your first initial energetic choice to do so, – your true intentions – and you were not even aware of it. That evilness in you – where that is in yourself, I am sure, you will keep yourself in ignorance of, while preaching peace, psychic perceptions of feelings and Christ energy being like a child. Because only a child would believe in the fantasy world you are attempting to “sell”.
That energy was the choice, and your whole being followed the inevitable path to manifestation of “over”. This casual and oh so free detachment and decision making of “over” is a fucking joke. People like you, do not truly deserve much mercy, because you have no real consideration for the feelings and being of others.
But yes, it is over for your soul..and your very choices have condemned you to ignorance and causing more suffering – or perpetuating it
People in pain, know these truthes – while being lectured to by people like you.
I wish people would just see that in themselves.
It would put them in persepctive of what Jesus saw (multiple realities super imposed in time, past, present and future), and why it works so well that he was killed, rather than to use his energies to stay alive … and have to live through the knowing that he would be a target for the rest of his “life”.
For the real loving hearts… knowledge without love is tools for manipulation. There is no dignity in that manipulation acquired through betrayal.
thankyou for posting this. this man is humble and truly understands. refreshing.
youtube.com/watch?v=GAhw–24t1g
youtube.com/watch?v=PS2NNlpxtNE
I guess what I wrote about human created rules and interaction with structures – reflects my Saturnine work. It’s been a few months now.
It’s Piscean, in the 11th house (Uranus) and opposed Pluto. I understand the limitations it places on my interaction with and functioning within human created systems.. an uneasy relationship. stability versus rebellion, rules versus transformation, pragmatism versus vision…
It’s been an upheaval individual battle against collectively created barriers.. But Saturn is also about patience and clear direction.. in other words HOW this energy is applied – makes all the difference. It CAN be creative, albeit slow and deliberate, integration is only possible if the Sun (heart) energy is manifest through it, if set goals are truly authentic and come from deep within.. or else it becomes an oppressive, mindless drive to survive from dawn to dawn.. or worse – a power hungry Cronos swallowing all in sight.. placing the validity of own existence in tangible manifestation of ‘I rule all’… when inside it’s crying for the meaning.
Systems need to be created with the true meaning in mind, with an inbuilt flexibility to organically INTERACT with the world around and CHANGE accordingly.
Saturn is one energy which can be completely subsumed by fear – of change. I’ve seen it in myself and people, especially strongly Saturnine folks which I know a few of. They cling to the familiar, to the 9 to 5, to the known places, people, habits, routines, jobs, holidays.. some of them KNOW this and openly admit ‘I am afraid’. Yes, I’ve heard that said to me, from grown up men. Yet… they do NOTHING about it.
One step at a time I guess…
I feel like a ghost, trapped.. this body needs to be fed and clothed, but things which matter to most people, things that get them into a twist, what is considered important out there – means nothing to me. And we help those in need, but have to leave behind those who want to remain ‘in need’ for the rest of their lives… And I imagined personal love.. no, that happy coexistence in the same flat routine – would suffocate.. And I imagined new acquisitions in their numerous incarnations: people, jobs, houses, sofas, dresses, diplomas – no, it would kill. And I imagined living my life for the sake of my son – and that would not bring any satisfaction. And I imagined seeing the same people and going to the same places year after year – poison. And that the Scorpio energy in physical life is easy to handle and doesn’t hypnotize anymore… I simply stand still and observe the ambiguous deliberate web weaving…
What’s left? Gradually over the last few months it boiled down to one thing – meaningful experiences.. when the heart beats so fast that I’m scared shitless and push through that, Pisces Mars is just so lame.. but my progressive Sun is in Aries now, maybe that explains the surge. The body will carry me as long as, through this hollow world, what’s after.. well, we’ll see one day at the Gates..
And even here, in this forum – is not enough anymore. My Aquarian 9th House Venus – whispers to me. It’s out there, many experiences and many people, in places I’ve never been before, sharing my ‘specialties’ with those who need them most… we are Pluto conjunct Uranus in Virgo generation… rattle that ideological consumerism cage, we live this life backwards, learning things that people learn in their twenties and then give up learning… we simply carry on.. Virgo is ideal, perfect love searched for within the debris of human constraints.
The answers were found, an overwhelming feeling of great loss, because freedom comes with no safety net and no map. A paradox. All I can wish to people here is one thing – the luxury of having a choice to sing their own melody.
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When this world will reach you today with a fist
Grasping its offerings of ‘one size fits all’ little beret…..
When the heavy clogs in the Army of million uniformed beast
March all over the heart, commanding you to obey…..
When your laughter dies, and the weariness grows
Through the shifting terrain of your life, unrelenting…..
Don’t continue to walk hand in hand with those
Who think and believe you are not outstanding.
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Give space to your Scorpio man.. and he will step closer and closer every time, the ambiguity is blown out of the way. An explosion of such tenderness, mixed with so much inner sadness… he WILL go into the cave. If you don’t follow him there, if you let him do the work – the sadness will transmute into hope and light. He will be back, and every second of patience, both in and out of the bedroom – will be returned tenfold. He will remember every touch, every utterance, every facial expression, every act.. those become part of him, absorbed into his being, no kindness and giving will ever remain unacknowledged.. Scorpio and Pisces together create a league of their own.. when both are free from games.
Emotional psychosexual ‘solitary confinement’ is not the answer… I’ve walked down that road, even if unconsciously, from the age 35.. Openness and being ‘in the now’, it doesn’t matter what will happen two weeks, two months, two years from here. ‘Now’ is good enough, a string of those ‘now’ flowing into one another is what makes the forever. And we are responsible for the making of each string.
This one is for you, Puppy..
WHERE FREEDOM IS FOUND
We are wrong.
True independence is a clever illusion,
For the world will impatiently ask
To follow the throng,
Taking you into the painful shards of collision,
When you refuse to wear that mask.
But don’t fall on this sword,
For the embrace of the eyes flows with meaning…
Atop of the world they reside,
Transformed into Goddess and God.
Divorced from compulsion, but not from the feeling,
In the freedom of nothing to hide.
The two are the song.
An explosion of tenderness not to conceal anymore…
Stepping close into that space from afar,
The true freedom is born,
A breathtaking point between him and her…
The freedom to be as you are.
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hehe.. this is kinda funny..
It is, isn’t it… had to smile myself, the irony of it.
very ironic, this is its very nature playing out. when something dies and its rotting into the earth like a dead bird or a lizard or something and ants and other birds and things and creatures come to feed on the remains.. and it goes round and round..and this is how it is , death gives life .transformation beyond self through surrender to acceptance of all the frequencies that come together and pull apart in what is their natural state.
Yes. Walking towards full awareness is not a linear process. We may feel an issue is sorted, right? Wrong. Life will present a new set, and the same stuff will surface… and you feel sometimes like saying ‘What the…. haven’t I dealt with you?’ Hahaha, it’s like peeling the layers off.. feels like a bottomless pit at times.
Life oscillates. People oscillate with it, the only way to stop it is to go so deep, BEYOND the immediate circumstances, beyond my thoughts and feelings, beyond anything that connects me to this world on a daily basis.. and wait for an answer. In there I become SURE, because it does not depend on anything outside of me. The frequencies you mentioned are our own, generated within, the whole spectre that we need to balance, the outer issues are only mirrors to our own state at any given time.
Ultimately.. it’s a lifetime path, and unique to all of us, but still a walk towards the Source of us. I find it’s not going to make life easier… just clearer.
hmm..yes i guess if it was about trying to make life easier then one wouldnt feel so connected. just a thought- i dont see it/feel it as something that needs to stop.. the oscillating.. for me thats just how it is.. like a flower opening and closing, like the moon rising and falling. like something alive then dying. its nature. it never stops , the dying and living and dying and living.. so the fear is just an illusion , there is nothing to lose. it is the attachment that causes pain.and attachment meaning unnatural attachment, like clinging,out of fear of loss. fear of separation… again all illusion, they dont exist really , just fabrications of the mind and things that have been taught to us to latch onto, believe. i feel the frequencies are not from me, they are universal frequencies that are beyond self.
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Pain and fear, hmm.. yes. Everybody feels fear, without exception. If we don’t – we are either lobotomized, or have reached that supreme state of
enlightenment where it is, indeed, an illusion. Because that innocent state of a new born – has passed, we’ve known life, we’ve tasted the dark side of things, it’s impossible to return to that state, or else we haven’t lived… It’s what we choose to do with our fears… from the higher ground of experience and understanding, to transform those gripping energies into something constructive, rather than destructive. And everybody feels pain, of loss, of separation, it’s inevitable. No attachment does not mean no feelings, it simply means – the observance of them from a higher ground. So yes, I WILL feel, I WILL cry if necessary, I WILL miss, but.. it will not send me into a dysfunctional state, and that’s the difference.
It’s good that we are all so different, isn’t it.. the world would be a pretty boring place if all be the same. We share the same energies, human physiology, huh… but what combinations dominate in each.. My natal chart is 50% water. Coupled with so many oppositions and squares… what happens WITHIN is what dictates how I interact with the world. If I don’t observe and curb the inside tides.. hmmm.. no oscillating is the goal for me, yes, regardless of what frequencies I encounter. My son and myself compared our states of emotionality and he came to the conclusion that while I’m emotional, he is – moody (Pisces plus Scorpio, hey). He can keep his dark
moods for days, although the outside world will NEVER know. I just flair up (not so much these days) and return to normal fast.
What happens outside of us will always have an impact. If I don’t balance myself from within – it will be a never ending internal storm. It has become much more balanced in the last few months, but when I feel something – I choose not to hide it. There is no shame in being seen, not for me. So on attachment.. Scorpio men are not comfortable with openness OUT THERE.. he said last night be careful when around other people, or they will talk. I said ‘People always do. Are you going to live your life looking over your shoulder? What if they do? What’s going to happen?’ He said ‘Nothing, but I just don’t like people gossiping about me’. What, for five minutes, and then they will move on? We spoke, and he couldn’t see his own confusion of wanting something, yet, buying into how the world dictates it should be… ‘The terms of engagement’ need to be renegotiated, because I’m not going to lie.
So my response was ‘If you feel you are doing something worth hiding – don’t do it. I’m going to leave now, because I feel you need to think this over really well’. And I left, with no upset feelings, with no anger, with no expectations. And I saw that he was silent, and devastated inside… He will brood over it and there will be a flurry of texts and calls, like he always does. Hiding in corners – is not my style. He needs to grow up, and if not.. well.. he will not forget me any time soon, for sure.
I am a woman. I want to learn from men, not to be in the role of a teacher all the time.
yeh scorpios are private creatures.. all of them, every single one i have known, male or female, its just how they are. there is nothing wrong with that.. i reckon the problems start when there is lack of acceptance of how someone is, on either side, and trying to change people. differences are fine , it is just when the differences impact one another.. ahh relationships so tricky hey.
thats gd you want to learn and not be teacher all the time. i doubt any man really wants to be taught anyway, not knowingly. sounds like he feels insecure or threatened by something you did or said, and is worried about what people think of him.’confusion of wanting something..” its like there is alway a risk, in everything. thats the thrill, the feeling of being alive. scorpios need this in their life. its the very edge of what drives them.. and wanting something is akin to vulnerability, because you might not have it or get it.
the world is full of rules and conditions, made by society. alot of it is bollocks. Scorps see through the crap. they see the game and make their own rules. its their survival and therefore their secret.and they will protect it with all they have. its just their inner instinct. looks like they are hiding. and they are. for good reason.
Umm, he wants to keep this a secret. There is no discernible reason for it, other than the age difference. Neither of us have a family here (he is not English), no obligations that could be impacted in any way.. it doesn’t matter to me if it’s a secret or not, but there are certain things which no man can or should attempt to ask me to do. One of those is looking people in the eye and lie, people I know. I would only do this if his life depended on it, and it’s not the case at all.
And yes, he wanted this for a very long time, said so himself..
‘Nobody puts Baby in the corner’. I don’t want artificially created ‘complications’, it is now very simple in my world.
I remember EVERYTHING. Everything said and not said, everything between the lines and direct. All twenty months of it.. I do. YOU have made a decision.. and I’ve walked all the way, still walking.. with or without. And I want to ask you a question which will require one simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’, but you will not answer, will you.. so whose burden has it become?
NOBODY will even come close, no matter what is or isn’t right now. This is just insane, Doc, a twilight zone.
Is this question for me? or for Pluto puppy? or for the man you are seeing in england?or someone else?
im unsure of who you are referencing in your posts
The Scorpio glyph is phallic. Notice the warrior point curves up. Fitting for Mars and fitting for male sexual energy.
In the movie 300, if you notice closely, the long spears used by the Spartans have that exact same ‘arrow point’ on the end of their spears. Another correlation is the ‘thrust’ they perform when killing during battle… that intense thrust correlates with the MALE sexual potency of Mars in Scorpio.
No wonder every female Scorpio thinks like a calculating sexual dominatrix to unsuspecting males. They are designed like men (mars thrust) exerted inside a woman’s body. Not an ideal, tender loving feminine match.
Mars and Pluto, our rulers, are not fluffy feminine qualities in a woman. They make her go ballistic… and that word again….controlling.
Occult stuff baby. Now made obvious to all who can see.
…The Scorpion’s tail also shows the phallic male sexual energy. Mars is not feminine sex. Feminine sex is Venus to all the bunnies out there. Please remain Venusian ladies. Do go all John Wayne on us males who soak in your feminine goodness.
The problem though with attached Scorpion (non-Eagle) desire as I’ve been sharing here for years… is that Mars sexual energy and desire is dim and unsophisticated, it’s thinking is attached to is sexual instincts only, as the lower-animal self in man and woman. That dim manipulation psychologically attempts control generally good heart people without knowing they are actually doing it. And IF they do know what they’re doing socially and sexually, that is knowing their INTENT is not above board, and sincere… then these lowly animal desires consume them inwardly from their perceived psychotic reality. The desire controls them. They (female Scorpios) have nil control over their desires.
I have to literally battle this energy socially in people and within myself daily,, because I am psychically/sensitively tuned into their unconscious intent.
It’s not easy to withhold my knowing from people who are blind of who they actually are. That’s my battle.
not many that can receive the potent male thrust of a mars scorpio..and receive it well.
moon in scorpio. can.
moon is feminine, not masculine. moon is feminine energy.very different from sun energy. capricorn moon is also feminine apparently.
hmm yes the lowly ones.they’re out there.they will use you and spit you out, plenty of make versions of that as well. plenty of shallow people in the world who couldnt give a damn about truth and soul transforming sex and intimacy.the fly by nighters.. they dont get my time or energy.
*typo- male not make
And yes Umm…the Virgo glyph in contrast is chaste. Should we name our daughter Chastity? haha.
The Virgin glyph crosses her silky legs… how cute and rightly feminine. The Virgin wants to grow though, as she represents chaste Persephone… who is innocently picking petunia’s from the rich soil and waiting for her abduction into…….. the underworld.
It might be a myth. But I can tell you now… women who have never experienced real transcendent love and sex and depth with a mature male in a relationship… KNOW that this mythical abduction is what their soul yearns for = Transformation… from the bondage of this earth.;)
Chastity.. so american… like an apple pie with braces and zits. how about Petal ?hehe
hmm maybe i should change my own name to Persephonumm. what do you think?
Apparently Virgo and Scorpio were once one sign. Then Libra was introduced and they split apart to become two separate signs. but the connection is still there..
Don’t… go all John Wayne.. please haha…leave the Lawyer/Political controlling attitude for lawyers.;)
john wayne?? haha i dont think so. im just saying it how it is. nothing political or controlling about that.
OK then… who knows much about oligodendrocytes, Nodes of Ranvier and amygdala as the seat of fear..
Today Jupiter enters my sector of love and life expansion, to stay for a year. For the first time in twelve years.. 12 years ago I got divorced, and it has been as dead as the sunken ship, hahaha.. so I am going to be brave and Puppy, I’m going to ask you my question… Be merciful and give truly, whatever the answer.. Can you DO that, something that is ASKED FOR in all honesty?
Naya Jivan… perspectives… You? A simple ‘yes’ or ‘no’, to me the answer means a choice between internal war and peace, then I can go away and rest in peace, regardless of what the answer is..
Please be kind… and maybe brave.
Thank you.
Puppy, why can’t you answer me.. This is not a game, and can a woman love a robot, someone who doesn’t feel to the very last atom? What are you afraid of?
I have my reasons to ask. Please, I can’t live with a puzzle for the rest of my life, I wish I never did, it was a chance occurrence…
“…why can’t you answer me..”
re; post 439.
You are not on my level; I don’t waste my energy with people I don’t like.
Your deafness doesn’t support your dumbness;)
My Sun is in your 12th House. You cannot SEE me.
This is not the answer. Stop playing self preservation games; taken to extremes – those result in self defeat, Puppy, again and again.. You are not being honest with yourself or with me.
I didn’t ask you if you like me or not. I asked you a direct question. Learn to give direct answers, because I am not a threat to you. You are all for change and learning not to fall into the dark side of Scorpio nature, don’t you (your post referral)?
So… answer me, without games.
The game is, you.
Listen intently to the first 10 minutes of this. If that flies over your head, I can’t help you.
Search… Deepak Chopra God and Buddha, on Youtube.;)
I have to go to London, so up early. I will watch it when I come back, thank you.
I have books of Deepak Chopra. And Sogyal Rinpoche. And Osho. And Swami Prabhupada. And Eckhart Tolle. And Bhagavad Gita, And The Bible. And others. But if we haven’t truly FELT the message.. if it hasn’t cut through us into the heart… if we are not prepared to live it… if we haven’t let go of the need to ‘defend’ – we haven’t truly grown. .. We ARE. And all out there – IS. There is nothing more to it. We are VERY SIMPLE inside.
Please don’t make it complicated. Fear of being truly KNOWN is real in you. And there is nothing to defend, Puppy. Love accepts ALL, no matter the answer. Love IS, but it wants to see clearly, because we ARE love. And Love wants the truth, not the ‘help’.
Yes, it is about me, because this puzzle entered my life last October.. It matters to me what happens in this space between us, and it always will. But it was also about you, about letting us both be… because it would let me – go. I am sorry you cannot see that clearly.
These are my reasons to ask. I had to… and your answer would have made the world of a difference to me. This is where you truly had a choice to give. You choose not to.
You still haven’t answered.
“…why can’t you…”
Can’t and… Won’t are two different states. You’re sick.
I choose;)
‘This is where you truly had a choice to give. You choose not to.’
You.. are you. I… am me. And we are both sick, in the same way. And I wouldn’t swap my sickness for ‘healthiness’ out there.
P.S. Should you resort to name calling again.. I can’t waste my energy on that. You choose, because I am not participating in that game.
Enjoy your evening…..
The fact that you ‘think’ I’m sick like you, justifies my name calling. I don’t call people names who know love, experience love;)
And the truth is you have desperately wanted me to call you names, so the audience you manipulate can ‘think’ of me as a person of ugly, loveless, conceited, self-absorbed light.
I know you better than you’ll ever understand you. And you wonder why I let you go.
Too bad I didn’t use acerbic profanity to you right now huh? Your piss poor humanity wants that;)
No, Puppy… acerbic profanity does nothing for me, and whether you do or don’t – leaves no mark. The AUDIENCE doesn’t matter, scoring points – for what? Tell me – what for? What is there to gain from ‘converting’ anyone? You know that I’m not afraid of constructive conflict, YOU TAUGHT ME THAT… with the audience or otherwise. What is there to lose or gain from ‘converting’ anyone?
I want you to be – you. AS YOU ARE. I know the Light that’s yours by the birthright. We have come to the same place from a different starting point in our natures and our search. I know who you are, down to the very last molecule of air you breathe out. The Darkness that gave birth to you becoming Light – doesn’t matter one bit, it’s part of you, and some of it will never go, you do know that, don’t you? DOESN’T MATTER. Yes, you will keep what you want to keep – to yourself. And it’s OK, because.. I do have the sixth sense. It is not ‘thinking’, darling… it is – KNOWING. It comes – through the space. Down to the details of when you see someone out there, so far.. and it has been recent.
I love you. And I cannot feel sorry for it.. it is how it is, how it has become, and how it will remain. I am simply happy you exist in this world. I cannot
talk to you, because you asked me not to. Yes, you let me go, and I know the reasons, and I respected your wish, have I not? I want to, yes, without the audience, because there is much to tell, without the game of chasing, without wanting a piece of you like you are a juicy steak… without the pretense of being ‘strong’, or the dependance on contact.. I remember your eyes… I remember your face I dreamed up before ever having seen you… I refereed to it in my posts in 2011, it was cryptic, about the colours.. who would have believed that… who can EXPLAIN that? Who can explain the reason for my question? There are MILLIONS out there, why did it happen?
You GAVE ME A LEASE OF LIFE, I am living it and making things happen for myself, in the way I want, and I know what I want now, listening to my inner voice. Without you – it wouldn’t have happened. And I have not let you go, not in my heart. Why do you feel this is? Because I see you as ‘ugly, loveless, conceited Light’? Is THAT what women want? Could I love a man like that? So who is it that I love? A man ‘like that’? You are far too intelligent to believe this yourself, so why say it?
…never mind the 12th House. I know – ME, and who I am in my physical life. It’s enough, baby, truly. There is nothing to prove. And if there is one thing you could do for me – give me credit in your heart – for being straight with you.
Well.. I’ve said enough. And I’ve done enough. What is false – will go, and what is true… will stay. It applies to both of us… if we let it.
I will not talk anymore. Observing something on a train from London gave me another insight today. Funny how it goes.. the signs are always there, if we choose to notice and listen.
The video has been removed from Youtube. When I search as you suggested it comes up with talks on different subjects, this, for instance..
youtube.com/watch?v=vljyLoJfaes or
youtube.com/watch?v=e9ut88HJWvg&list=PLGw79pJDYlMt8Vto8uNOfOcU78v7lCVP6
When I introspectively observe myself I see that the cause of any rising discontent always comes from – THOUGHTS. And the thoughts are perpetuated by either desires or fears. Out there in nature, when an animal is hungry – it hunts, when it is threatened – it fights or runs away to safety. The hormones rise, give impetus to action and then subside. No thoughts. Humanised dogs pick up on HUMAN MOODS, and manifest their anxieties. I know because my friend had two. She (Taurus) is married to a Libra, and to say it’s difficult.. when away from each other they are the most loving, texts, e-mails etc. The minute they are under the same roof – communication is non existent, he is defensive and verbally abusive, she is locked into silence. It has a VISIBLE impact on the animals, it’s amazing…
So.. the circle of thought/emotion.. deep meditation, the mental dive right into own blood stream, following every hormonal substance to the brain and beyond.. really clears immediate arousal states.
You believe the audience motivates me? LOL… YOU motivate me. Like no other. That’s part of the fascination… no one has EVER challenged me to grow… through love and higher Mind.. 9th house Venuses? Here… we know each other because we ARE each other. Mercury in both runs at 3-5 degrees of Sun conjunction. It MEANS that our perceptions, expressed through words – reflect the Ego, not the deeply felt heart energies – the inner heart tenderness, burried under the sensitivity to… word. Magnified if the Sun and the Mercury fall into the same sign.
Sorry, Puppy, this is MY WAY of expressing things. This is my way, here, to love. Love is not EXPERIENCED online. In physical life the expression of love requires very few words. And.. screaming during transformative sex… no, you don’t. Ever:) It’s quiet, the last breath of life leaves the body, and the absorption into ‘death’ is so complete…
If you can find the correct link, I would be most grateful. Observing a person talking tells much more about them, than reading their books.
and Gatubela.. I remember how you said once when the Darkness comes you are able to clear it fast.. Yes, it is how you said it.
Applying will, is actually an energy that is beyond oneself. Most people feel that is is akin to sitting on the toilet trying to get a stubborn turd out. Being stagnant, not moving, pushing and getting your face all red. They feel pretty powerful too, while doing all of that effort. Most people walking on the streets these days are psychologically constipated, putting their energies into things that do not feed their souls.
Also, it is easy to apply will through our lower natures – i.e. darkness. Because our feeling strongly is often associated to “Strongly Motivated”. The difference between calmly looking at something that frightens you and running like fucking hell, makes the essential difference between what is really motivating.
If you don´t feel like you can defend yourself, it is probably because piscean energies require universal truthes resonating through soul. Those doors and secrets are protected actually, and only those who are sincere go through. Only then do heaven and hell meet in unity. Meaning, darkness used for a soulful purpose. So, yeah, until then, we will be hearing endless chatter on your part, while you look for eternity in stimulation.
The only result you have seen, is based on the illusion of where you have placed your will. Its a fucking joke that you say you are defenceless – as darkness certainly is a part of you.
As I have said, by your fruits, you will definitely be known, as you begin to look for stimulation to that endless emptiness of nothingness. That kind of eternity is never self sustaining and requires the energy of others in order to create that demon.
So, yes, I am aware that I am only giving more fuel for your bah -bah – badness. I hate that I am doing it, because I do not sense truth in your words, only that insincerity that I have been talking about.
But…as we all start light in mental defencelessness which is really a lack of true light (really this is the truth if we were to face our deaths – we would be overwhelmed by our fears which is the polarity of “dark”), then I guess I can look at your dimming candle flame with a bit of objectivity and a bit of concern for your soul.
In order to feel fire – close your eyes, get in tune with the pisces universal energy and just stay there for more than a while. Don´t loose focus on that – just stay there and ignore the emotional and the mental. If you be feeling wuv energies, you will be close. Only the sincere will feel it, so …lol…don´t go there unless you mean it. The light abyss is just as tricky as the dark one. You will need to focus on your sincerity and humility.
Your natural will to stay there, might get you more than a spark or two.
Dont forget that you have to get back to reality. Clear your aura by being truly grateful for being alive…
You take this here, THIS, which has been a de facto INTERNAL DIARY…. as manifestation of what I AM out there? IMAGINE how your internal thoughts/states, or Puppy’s, or anybody’s here… would translate, if put on paper.. the Darkness.. people hide it though, don’t they.. I sometimes fantasize about rape, I don’t know if it has anything to do with my experiences or the fact that I’m quite yielding by nature (hard to believe, huh? But like you said.. in real life you are quiet and shy). This DOESN’T MEAN I want this in real life. Now imagine putting this in a diary…
I happened to stupidly transmit my internal personal journey on a public website… a very intimate level of exposure… It will never happen again.
Sincerity of Being versus sincerity of telling others how to be.. which one was Christ..? Where is the true intent? Next time when that woman/man looks at you guys and says they are fine… and you SEE they are concealing who they are… and it leaves you wondering about what’s going on… remember… I didn’t make it that hard on you to see me.
Do not be concerned about my soul, Gatubela. I’ve done a test recently, based on visuals only, an instinctive response without thinking… it said ‘You are the Seeker’. My soul is evolving.
As for the ‘Puppy love’… relationships enter our lives, and we have to let them evolve and change and leave. Something has detached inside, it’s telling me that this story here now – is complete..
I want to walk on my own, and I am leaving in love.
“This does not mean I want this in real life….”
It might – believe me on that.
Because the nature of darkness does know our deepest fears – and desires and knows that it is the path to light and transcendance. Its ugly, but it is a harsh truth that many women do not want to face. Mastering our sexual energy does lead to transcendance, in which I have not seen written about anywhere. I guess I will have to continue reading your responses which lead to nowhere.
I know that you are feeling rather explosive and throwing the words “Christ” “darkness” and other interesting emphatic words but unless you understand what it is to live your darkness and what it can manifest in your life, then you are not in any position to bla bla bla. Scorpionic energy understands this, and this is why there is so much acceptance to our inner natures.
You only show intolerance to yours.
Explosive.. not at all. I feel like a great cross fell off my shoulders. like I’ve been in prison for the past nearly two years, and am out now… I can’t even BEGIN to tell you how it feels. that is the God honest truth of my reality.
Until people submitted themselves to these horrendous Neptunian forces.. and managed to find a way out… they will never get it. It can be just as brutal in its capacity to destroy and hijack one’s life as Scorpionic obsessive quest for control..
Scorpio will always understand that control exists – because “something” is capable of creating life…and the mysteries and wisdom of earth – nature. i.e.— > something is running the show! It is there in every tree…every where we look, and how the heck is it happening?
The realms of pisces once under the influence of saturn – are more interesting to feel. You can stick (ground earth energies) to something to that trustworthy grumpy energy.
LoL…
There is something as “the right kind of control”…its soulful, not egocentric. Am not an expert at it, but I do know it leads to the beauties of pisces.
Neptune is not such a bad place once you know what your reality is. Alot of the crap kind of goes away.
Monologue Of A Washing Machine
I accept all that comes in as soulfully equal
When humans think of me as soulless..
I run those programmes steady, not fickle,
Egalitarian in my washing machineness.
Democratically cleaning your period pains
And the sweaty pants soaked in lust,
Shirts with your kids’ last dinner remains
And lacy bras hugging her voluptuous bust.
I will quietly hum through your vomit like fears
And morning after spermatozoid collection…
In my stainless steel womb everything clears.
Themis of Laundry, with no cycle for mental infection.
The copyrighted flakes of your human biology,
Countless stories of blood, sweat and tears…
I’ve become an expert in human psychology,
What they throw in me – is not what truly appears.
———————-
Ay caramba!! things that enter…. good to be alive
new product hitting the shelves..
http://www.vulva-original.com/vulva-perfume.htm
ha . the video at the top is pretty funny..
LoL.. now that’s what I call creative marketing. People will buy Vulva for the humor perceived and the mystery of the potion.
Even if it is bottled salmon juice.
But you know sexual funnyisms are the easiest for selling any product. You’re an adventurous little stinker today Umm.
I read somewhere that it had cumin in it. hmm.
What about a potion for women….could be called “Scrotum”. Don’t think its been done..
This singer is a little Virgo dynamo… most people would perceive her as tweekin on meth… but what I see is her purified awareness through death.. of the personality. She is experiencing a nirvana of sorts, sans any drug or alcohol. Her sensitivity of the world is feeling beyond the rational mind. Paradoxically, the bravery of her suffering has aided her self-insight.
The Virgo-Pisces axis is one of spiritual service. The axis of self-sacrifice experiences real suffering in this oppressive 3 dimensional world but is commonly very lost of how to heal, and rise up, rather than escape through disillusioned escapes, via personality addictions.
I just watched a great film tonight, called “the Master” . I don’t think I have ever watched a film as moving as this..Joaquin Pheonix, a true Scorpio,exploring very Scorpionic themes, battling his addictions, his inner fears and ultimately facing his own truth with such gutwrenching bravery and honesty. Phillip seymour hoffman brilliant in this as well.. and a beautiful and fitting soundtrack composed by Johnny Greenwood from Radiohead(also a Scorpio funnily enough)
I’m still having tingles..
sorry.. spelling is Phoenix
Did he win the battle, or was it a story of a journey?
Umm, just going by the feel of it.. is your Mercury also in Virgo?
I didn’t know Johnny Greenwood is a Scorpio, and I thought I know every Scorpio in the world LOL.. people comment on it. That explains the melodies…
i’m not saying. Watch the film if you are interested. And yes my mercury is in Virgo.
I noticed that whatever types of energy we lack in our chart – pulling those upwards brings the MOST satisfaction and inner content. For instance, I have absolutely no planets in fire/cardinal signs:( All Yin, utterly female energies dominate my chart. Which means that motivation and willful action have always been a struggle for me… I have to FEEL strongly about something, to get actively engaged.. preferably, no benefits for me, because it makes me feel uncomfortable to fight for something I’m vested in on a personal level. I FEEL shameful about it. It is really hard to overcome this turn of mind when active action for own benefit is perceived in that way..
Gatubela, you asked me once how I apply my will.. this kind of answers that.. if it’s nothing to do with me. Otherwise… I just dissolve into the Universe. How does a flower fend for itself? With the minimum of effort, except it doesn’t feel like a cheat. I do feel it’s a handicap of sorts. Sometimes I wish I could have the roots into the ground and quietly obtain the nutrition that way… and not worry about anything else. Lack of ambition? The good thing is – I see it clearly now.
You know when people ask ‘Whom would you like to be for a day?’ I would like to feel the dominant energies, each in turn: fire, air, earth.. no water, I know what it feels like LOL
I wonder if anyone lacks some energies strongly, and how they deal with that.
Steven Forrest says that we are the synthesis of all twelve signs. Yet, it’s hard to identify some in ourselves, when I cannot FEEL it inside.. the feeling/thinking axis is the one that shapes who I am.. with the smidgen of earth thrown in..
There are the right triggers to activate what’s missing.. Gatubela, you are fire Sun and fire ascendant.. what does the energy of fire FEEL like?
Damn.. it’s like twelve different languages in the Babylonian tower..
The will… is connected to the heart (fire).. then it becomes effortless, rising from deep within… we cannot NOT do it.. It’s as light as a feather, and as strong as a diamond.. true will FLOWS, feeds the soul, not deprives it through application of ‘the iron will’ – The turd.
Saturn in Pisces.. is asking to overcome the limitations of own consciousness, that visceral Piscean existence between the two states of clear flood and stagnant pools of black water.. an undisciplined mind leads to an undisciplined, chaotic life here on Earth… It’ funny how Chronos gave birth to Chaos..where the naive construct of own earthly, ‘tangible immortality’ kills the divine within. This is especially pertinent to Pisces, for they have no concept of time… there is always MORE, everything BECOMES, never ending.. translate this into the tangible world existence, and you can begin to see the mess….
Gatubela, I see that I’ve known the energy of fire. I see when it occurred in my past. The Heart is where the answers are found to all the mysteries.. to all energies. It’s all there, within, the complete circle.
What’s up colleagues, how is all, and what you want to say about this post, in my view its truly amazing in support of me.
I know it has become an addiction to write here, I’m not blind. Maybe because it’s so very important for me to be open and without pretense, when people out there prefer the masks.. so this here has been a sanctuary of self exploration, of all that people usually hide from each other.. no one wants to see the whole spectre of dark and light in another, because it reminds people of their own, frightens them, takes them out of their comfort zone.. makes them look the other way, as it has happened here… Makes them ask questions ‘Could I be LIKE THAT?’ Well.. YOU ARE. No human being, no matter how evolved and enlightened – is free from own nature. If they tell you that – they lie. It’s just that you have a different herd of demons to shepherd.
People hiding behind the shields… yet, believing that Love (truth) will cure all. The Truth is NOT TO HIDE. Everything else follows from there, it gives each other a chance to feel compassion for another, through seeing their true nature.. which is always beautiful, underneath all the outwardly projected garbage.
Addictions come from ‘add’.. so cured by extrication of self, the subtraction from the addictive experience… I’m giving a vow to myself and here – to walk away.
Piscean self sacrificial experience.. view this as the study case of the human condition; some apply to you, if you look very very closely.
I liked how you said that will connected to the heart is effortless . It is the epitome or higher energy of “Piscean Lazyness”. Maybe you can set the world on fire.
Well…lol…its energy Ines. Its all in the cosmos – which is Pisces domain too. You don´t need to be a Leo or fire sign in order to feel it – not if you know your reality.
Fire is not Leo….its cosmic fire…
Earth is not mud…but symbolic of energy floating in the cosmos…
etc.
Its like all learning is “out there”. Tune in and the energy has something to say to you.
It is said that every tibetan singing bowl has a teaching in its sound. A handmade one that is. These are an example of hidden secrets of Tibetian monks who strived for eternity through tangible and intangible. For everyone else, they look like salad bowls.
Ninjas left messages imprinted in objects too, in order for their clan to pick up and read.
If you tune into yourself, you will feel your own ancesters who make up your energetic signature too.
True faith is not found on earth, but in this knowledge that the dream of more can only be manifested in your life with heartfelt sincerity – after saturn completely enforces reality (its the when heaven meets hell kind).
I simply felt it when it kicked me into action… the energy of laziness (lack of will) is lack of one’s heart essence..
I meditate on the singing bowl sounds..
A thought came to me… ‘I don’t NEED to validate my existence TO ANYONE OR ANYTHING IN THIS ENTIRE WORLD’……………… and that’s when I let go… EVERYTHING went upside down, quietly, at night, when the world was asleep.. I don’t NEED to prove, receive, give, beg, ask, share, say, explain…long sentences, long thoughts, in language that fails… NO NEED for any of it ahahaa.. I AM, not even I, just AM.. my mind went blank, and stopped… don’t need to be loved by anyone, I AM LOVED, always have been.. and the pain will be, and people will be the pain, and I don’t need to be a Buddha woman, I am, in all its imperfect humanity, these openings into us, the perfect creation, we are, perfect and complete, SO COMPLETE that there is no who.. personal identity, a shell around us, you know what it looks like? layer upon layer in the cut tectonic plate, millions of years.. here is a dense layer, it formed when we got hurt.. here is the soft silky one, it happened when we loved and were loved in return.. here is the bright orange one, the colour of iron earth, and this one built up when we got praised.. here is the muddy grey one, it’s when we felt loss.. the shell is thick, but not AM, I get it, I GET IT…… there is nothing in there to do, or ask for, or gain, or thrive for, there truly is nothing to do… there is nothing, but BE, in all that is. and the identity will coalesce into that, not the master,but the servant.. When personality pushes us to centre stage, crying for attention from the audience (and there are so many ways to manifest that thirst, specific to each one of us) – it’s lower end Leo.. Yet.. the childlike curiosity in us, unconcerned with attention from others, expresses itself freely – it’s magnanimous Leo energy too. I’ve always believed we are not born a blank slate. Certain energies DO dominate in us, running through the bloodstream… Look at your youngest son, Gatubela… he FEELS the astral plane.. he doesn’t know that yet. It’s open, at first like the blue sky, gets darker and darker… but it’s always open in the Fish… Teach him what it is.. give him the freedom to be who he truly is.. my son grew into this beautiful, self sustaining, purposeful being, who has known his destiny in this world since he was eight. he is a much better man than I have ever been a woman… maybe I’ve failed as a woman, but succeeded as a mother. I was guided by my inner wisdom through my love for him.. but couldn’t do this for myself.
Gatubela… I looked at my love… I AM.. and others ARE.. and I let them BE. As they are. There is nothing more beautiful than a person who feels that there is no judgement value placed on them.. that’s my physical reality.
…beautiful endings. Sprout..will be the Wisdom.
LoL …my little Paduwan is not interested in shoelaces nor personal appearance. Actually, he went to school one day when I was not looking, in two different kinds of socks. His hair can be a bit messy and he decided he did not need his school uniform that day. Every day I have to remind him to tie up his shoes….He gives me this self righteous look – “What for???” Its hard to answer …because he tunes out… other than “So obvious!!! So that you don´t fall on your ass (which you will need for various things)…get with the program kiddo!” His answer..”Why did you not tell me???”
My answer: “Ummm…I tell you every day…”
Because what is obvious to him, older children can´t even answer.
I work on heart Ines…because the idea of karma and the fact that it can be changed is within my vision. Working from that source…is my maximum elbow room.
I don´t know how he will be when he grows up…I can only have my focus on his soul. He would not want it any other way.
.
I have learnt that letting others “be” is sometimes very much like turning your cheek and looking the other way.
When you see it happening in front of you and just “let others be” then there is where we are not on the same wavelength. Supposedly you are out of the abyss and have learnt certain things…and somethings are within our grasp to change and make a difference.
Yeah…i know that leos are famous for wanting attention…being all fun and games and bla bla bla…
As I have mentioned…that shit all goes away when you face death.
Oh right…leos don´t know death….
Appearances and shoelaces…yeah.. I got around that one by buying him only velcro shoes.. by the age of fifteen he accepted that shoelaces are the necessary ‘evil’.. he wore a school jumper with elbow holes in it… and went through a period of wearing slippers to school.. until the school noticed and protested, and he protested back.. he was 17… he said slippers are more comfortable LOL
‘letting others be’ and ‘looking the other way’… there is a difference.. To ‘right the wrongs’ is about the crime, not the person committing it..I let the person be.. changing another to my way of perceiving reality is an act of violation to me. The crime – needs addressing. I’ve paid my price on a few occasions by not looking the other way, but personal penetrations are not me.
Gatubela, the abyss changed my way of perceiving things… it has not changed my values. They are as they’ve always been. The other world reality, remember.. the Piscean Utopia.. it’s always there. Some of us try to live it… and suffer… and the sky gets darker and darker.. and we collapse and stop BELIEVING.
To a Piscean no belief means Death. We die inside, because there is nothing to hold on to, or that’s how people begin to feel their reality. THEN you get depressions.. illusion of ‘I am right’… clinging to what is… keeping your nose to the ground only, unable to lift your face to the sky…
Leo knows death when it cannot express freely, you must know that one intimately.. and I was that Leo here, expressing self in the face of misunderstanding and open hostility.. there is a Cat.. and a Fish – in all of us.
The Fish learns by experience.. when my son was one I took his hand and put against a very hot radiator, for a second… he really felt it, and I said ‘It’s very hot. When you touch it – you get burned’… he got it.
So.. let your son walk with his laces undone. One day – he will fall. he will cry and be hurt. he will do up his shoes laces after that.. without reminders. LOL
cheese waffle. tomato and cheese waffle. waffle with avocado and tomato and cheese.waffle with asparagus and cheese . waffle with cheese. and onion.and tomato. waffle with a sprout
…”a” sprout and no cheese? A single sprout??? 😦
It was going yummier and yummier for a while..jejeje
😉
There’s the name of our daughter > Sprout.
I would imagine she will be a ferocious lil sprout, just like her like godmother Gatubela, and her surrogate mother Umm.
I’ll have a warm waffle with my waffle on my waffle plate please… Who said polygamy was impossible.
Probably be a handful. Does it run in the family?
*sigh*
P.Puppy, I actually feel that venus in scorpio >>> in love, says polygamy is impossible.
One day, you will find her and have a field of sprouts to share the nest with.
Umm…you were thinking alfalfa? I was thinking bean. LoL…it must be the oriental in me.
well i was thinking bean too, but falfa also has ring to it…alfalfa is maybe a tad too much on the lean side though…bit anorexic hehe
No polygamy is a contract binding a persuasive male figure with an assortment of women he can rule for his sexual needs. I will say though, in my life experiences, the variety of women I have penetrated.. *no pun… have all taught me something incredibly important about who I am over time as my identity has expanded.
In other words I have learned about my needs for sexual autonomy and freedom to be with whom I feel can teach me further lessons about myself. My soul. Which means I have the psychological capacity to handle dozens of women simultaneously as close friends or in the bedroom. Just look at my history here with you and others on this blog. Not one woman in my life thus far has emerged through Hades knowing herself through a range of sexual and expansive spiritual awakenings as an evolving self.
As stated years ago… women are little girls in my eternity. Persephone’s who understandably fear the harsh unknowns of life and transformation. There is so much they are incapable of understanding about me, my path and soul desires, that they deserve my honesty and detachment. Rather than me manipulating their unconscious superficially to serve my sexual needs.
The higher knowing of who I really am refuses to treat women as slaves or symbols to partner with for the sake of partnering.
The old cliche of male Scorpio being “out if reach” is true.
The abyss isn’t much fun for woman to navigate sans a hero to help her.
So I am out of reach, even though I could easily create a relationship with any doe-eyed bunny tomorrow;)
ha! yes Sprout.. has dual meaning too. Could be called falfy for short.
and you would be on a bicycle one of those ones that pedals whipped cream, pedalling like crazy a frenzy of creamy stiff peaks to crown those warm waffles topped with succulent strawberries 😉
The spark of feminine joy and love. Followed by how dim males really are in the comments section.
http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/mlb-big-league-stew/one-coolest-first-pitches-ll-ever-see-thanks-160051699.html
“Which means I have the psychological capacity to handle dozens of women simultaneously as close friends or in the bedroom.”
How is that different from.. promiscuity? No matter what kind of spin is put into it???
No one woman (or man) emerges from Hades ‘overnight’, transformed and fully AWARE, knowing herself… it takes YEARS, to learn and to grow.. partnerships, if based on that drive – evolve and grow too, as a separate entity.. Evolving.. means for life, does it not?
This is the truth of your reality.. as chosen. At least, you are open about it.. btw… not by way of judgement, just facts.
Puppy you old dog.. You know I really believed it when you said to me ages ago that asking for a feminine body for you is the illusion of a fickle ego love.. except… then the niggling feeling entered.. not for someone like you to stay away from the feminine form… LOL
I have a poem for every occasion.. as you all know by now.. here is one writen a few days ago.. I really, fucking really KNOW you. Thank you for the time we spent together here.. it was.. penetrating, hahhaaaa.. on both sides.
Last Century’s Man
When the youth of you prime ebbed away,
And you stink like a goat,
Bellied and wrinkled…
When young gazelles look on with pity
At colourless eyes, hair grey,
Never wanting to stay….
When no woman will touch with a barge pole
In that night pot you piss
And every time miss…
When your toothless gums bleed
And no helping hand
For the urgent toilet need..
When your cock has shrivelled
To the size of a woman’s nipple,
And you feel like a cripple..
When every day is like new reality,
Your mind’s painful descent
Into age related insanity hell…
Remember Pisces –Virgo axis..
Give me a bell.
————-
The lesson for me, amongst many many others… ALWAYS, ALWAYS trust your gut instincts, Ness LOL
Illusions are plenty, the instinct – tells you how it REALLY is.
How is that different from.. promiscuity? No matter what kind of spin is put into it???
Moron, you deserve every bit of the guy who says he’s faithful to only you, but cheats on you.
You are so filthy and detesting to me, I don’t know why I tell the truth. Get out of my conversations with others you frickin parasite;)
“Spin” is your thing. Spin is all that you are. Which is nothing;)
A scary reality, isn’t it, Puppy…
Why do you not LIKE YOURSELF? You know who you are, but on a very DEEP level – don’t love that… Go look in the mirror.. this is the ONLY person you will live with in this life, THE ONE AND ONLY.. there is no other. Love him, he deserves all the love in the world. That’s the crux of all that you are – lack of love for SELF.
Sex on that level exists, yes.. except the feelings that arise in that state, a sense of connectedness to the reality of imagination – are TRANSIENT. They are – freedom from the mundane copulation, that’s all. NOT LOVE.
You are cheating yourself out of real love… the ivory tower of your existence. That’s the Pisces Rising speaking in you. Not Scorpio.
My post 1983….
Nobody deserves to be cheated upon, not you, not me, not anyone else, it’s the betrayal of trust.
Anger manifests when a person feels unable to change their reality.. when they feel… powerless, in essence… tell me… what’s the difference between your throwing the Scorpionic passion of anger at me… and the next person in the street with that baseball bat?
You have to understand… it truly has no power over my feelings, no power to change the vision that I have.. I’ve moved on from wanting to be the Buddha woman for you.
The Truth of your reality that you tell.. at last…. The burden of being unknown by anyone in that outer world.. I understand your reality. All I’m saying is.. it’s not your essence, brother. Yes, that Scorpio Venus… has no allowance for that kind of reality.
Talk to me in ten years time. Tell me if it worked for you. There won’t be much that did.
Hola Ines,
Leo´s can talk a storm of nothing. Lol…major sun rays all over the place. Let me give you an example…in the courts, the legal counseller indicated that she had never seen children as damaged as mine. And then she partially blames me and my Canadian culture as part of the reasons why they have suffered so.
Now you tell me what power words have or any desire I may have to express myself, would impact this injustice? Go and tell an angry person to calm down or a dishonest person to stop lying? Who is really listening? So it has nothing to do with my leo energy…or me not beleiving. Its the knowledge that words are not tools that can change anything. Its not that I feel I can talk either. Words are limitted in my experiences. Hell…someone bleeding to death or on fire is limitted in this world.
So..here I am with bla bla bla…trying to get you to understand that what gets me depressed is the implication of what I have just said. Its not that I no longer believe, its just that belief is irrelavent to what will really happen or the outcome, if I rely on passive piscean energies.
I mean the universe is not just sitting on its ass.
Hi P.Puppy,
That is a common venus in scorpio thingy is it not?
Its because your nature requires the light in women after penetration. They have to go back to earth every time they leave Hades.
Evolving is not perceived on earth planes – as Hades knows, base don the fact that infinite possibilities (from source) require the manifestation of one eventual physical manifestation. Thats the choice. That choice will be based on the meeting of life and death, or the manifestation of when soulful darkness can be manifested through balance.
The evolution will always be balance once out of the abyss.
That balance mayo r may not be majorly sexy. I dont remember there being a pole for Persephone in Hades. Maybe Hades should install one…
“Evolving is not perceived on earth planes – as Hades knows,”
Yes, 100% accurate. Why can’t warped material (sensual) earth people perceive worlds beyond this one?
As I have written below, the answer is because of their prosaic existence. Nil arousal of feeling which stimulates them beyond feeding their guts 3 times a day. Nil of that divine spark inside of us which you understand so well.
As Einstein’s immortal statement implies…
…Imagination is more important than knowledge.
The problem is 99% of humanity cannot relate with that trusim in their everyday, feed the belly, yap ceaselessly and seek significance, of a humdrum life (existence).
Ooh ‘hola’ sounds so nice.. I wish I could speak Spanish. The Russian one for this is ‘privet’.. read as written, with stress on the last syllable..
I do understand, Gatubela..
Angry people on a personal level.. here is how (and I stood between men with baseball bats and broken glass bottles, ready to slash…) I don’t tell them to stop being angry… I ASK them why they are.. people’s feelings need to be validated (= heard and seen), no matter how ugly.. I didn’t have the gun pointed at me, I would imagine the sense of calmness at that moment would be overwhelming, because this is what usually happens to me when in threatening situations… everything falls away.. Anyway… every time I asked – people got a shock that someone actually ACKNOWLEDGED their state, instead of either pretending it’s not there, or becoming aggressive and trying to kill in turn.. some start urgently saying why they are angry.. some don’t even REALISE they were.. people have very approximate understanding of own emotions, it’s shocking really…
Angry people on a structure level… when I spoke about demands of structures, and the lies imbedded in there, and people representing those structures… that’s what I meant. That counselor of yours – was angry, a constant inner state of being that people are not aware of.. You are right, words do not change the reality on that level, I had enough smacks in the face to know… the only thing is.. where do we go from there? We need to carry on regardless, that was the faith I lost a few years back, not that I knew it as now, but the internal belief in the good was demolished within me.. Now.. I’ve let go.. and that sets the mind into a different state all together. Piscean energies become passive only when there is no inner Source to rely on.. the Source of own wisdom, I go in there.. the action then rises, I don’t know how it works, just that it happens spontaneously. I guess the closes would be – it becomes a calling.
My first boyfriend was a Leo, we kept writing to each other for a couple of years after I left the city.. and I know a few in my life, went to see one two weeks ago in fact…In ALL of them there is a very big heart and kindness, that innocent belief in the importance of own existence.. which often leads to others playing games with them, psychological games, because Leo are often oblivious to others’ intentions, well they would be, with so much concentration on themselves…
Without Leo energy we all would descend into a state of mistrust of who we are, not giving ourselves a chance..
…probably 80% of those people eat only once a day. Poverty and survival is powerful. I don’t take the needs of survival for granted. I’m just in awe of the sheer power survival has over billions of people. It’s grim, but it is the earth which binds humans to that grimness.
Gatubela, the implications of what you are saying are that we will always be up against forces beyond our control.. I felt it a bit, and so.. there isn’t really much we CAN control.. except… our perceptions.. I mean I can look at my situation now (no sugar and spice btw) and condemn it… OR I call upon that trusty Saturnine energy and ask… for the tools which allow me to change MY REALITY… to dive into that requires grit… and it gets filthy… but it works.. Buddhism places that as a basic tenet: we view all objectively, ask our higher knowledge what we want to happen.. ask what we need for that to happen… acquire what we need for that to happen… and then.. jump.
I’m trying to jump now… believe me it’s scary. But I have faith.
“That is a common venus in scorpio thingy is it not?
Its because your nature requires the light in women after penetration. They have to go back to earth every time they leave Hades.”
Sex (orgasm) is a death of the ego illusion, Gatubela.
Illusion is what people ‘think’ is real among their neurosis in the dysfunctional deceit and possession of the mundane. Mundane sex is meaningless sex. And meaningless sex is performed by meaningless people. And meaningless people are as boring as the lies which they honor to be real and true.
Orgasm is not just to procreate. Orgasm is magic divinity in the molecular vessel called the human body. These states of intense feeling enable an imagination, A VISION of reality, which is far more important than survival knowledge like paying the bills and buying a boat that we don’t need. Feelings which are impermanent but all wise and all knowing, creating higher, clearer consciousness exploding transformation through the mind, the cells, a precious and eternal conscience of what is abusive intent at the sensual level and what is – Love.
Beware the insincere poison that feeds on kind responses for psychotic significance, Gatubela.;)
You considered yourself a Buddha Chick? Well…again, it left me reeling with the feeling that you are a bit sick. And by your answers you just manifest more insincerity. More lies…more sickness.
Its not a theory…its a state of being. Some sacred energies such as Reiki are passed along through symbols – kanji…or from a teacher.
So – Actually, you don´t medítate to singing bowl sounds. You manifest the vibration from within yourself based on love and purity. Hearing the bowls won´t work at all. You don´t understand, even when you say you do. These energies will be hidden from you because of your insincerity and ego.
Based on that love, promiscuity as you perceive it, does not exist. Nor does cheating by the way. On a soul level, the universe has other things to do, based on sacred energies…in which we are actually a vessel of. The existance of all that we are, can not be reduced to “you cheated on me…” “You are promiscuous.” It also is not reduced to having sex either.
Orgasm however, might be part of the bigger picture. Chinese medicine says that if a woman does not have an orgasm while conceiving a child, then the child will not have a strong ancestral qi.
I know that what I am saying sounds bad…but if you just feel the suffering in this world, or have ever felt the karmic consequences through non-existant time, which is the place where the reality is eternal, the solution will never be found in man´s law, definitions…or intentions in controlling an energy that is in its essence, both creation when in tune with the higher self and chaos waiting to happen (illusion) when subject to negativity.
Its not that it won´t hurt like hell if someone cheats on you or if someone is promiscuous…only that feeling the soul gives that understanding that accusing or insulting..based on subjective feelings, is what we have been doing for centuries…and we have not evolved our way of communicating with each other at all. Or being with each other. Why can´t we learn from the collective experiences of others and strive to improve? It like we have that amnesia every time we react negatively to others and go back to two year old temper tantrums, oral needs, poopy issues etc.
The difference between passionate scorpionic anger and a baseball bat on the street, is that you are still alive and mouthy. A baseball bat on your head would have shut you up. I mean it in the sense, that I have felt that gun on me…and not in any disrespect to you. Its just the truth of matters. Intention to love means ALL. It shines through and arrives to the soul…or to those who have one.
Goodbye Gatubela.)
Defending you was my mistake. Defending myself was no mistake. She speaks about me like a vile sewer rat, implies my intentions are impure in that vile poem of hers… and you go off at me for being completely open about my life?
Promiscuity exits you fool. If you “think” you’re too precious for it to happen to you, then like I said… my mistake for caring about you. As if I’m married to you? Look at your own life and wake up. Honesty cuts deep.
Revealing my soul to you was a big risk. Honesty has been denied and reacted. I’m not obligated to sharing my journey with you or anyone any else.
Grow in the world you think you know Gatubela, because it’s not my world;)
Oh that’s right… anger and temper does not exist in your world either. What fake world do you breath in.
Adios;)
Puppy… this was addressed to me..
The poem.. did not refer to you as a sewer rat.. one day you will be old and ‘undesirable’… but not for those who really care. It is what happens out in that world… you do live in it, don’t you? Please read things properly first, without launching self into self defense… God I really do love all that you are, fuck..
Gatubela.. as Puppy said 😉 promiscuity does exist..
the BUddha is in all of us. And I don’t like to be called ‘a chick’, in all honestly. I am not a Bunny… or a chick… or a Persephone.. I am a woman. The truth is… once you accept being called whatever… the baseball bat comes out next.
Yes, accusing or insulting is based on subjective feelings.. There is nothing wrong with subjective feelings, that’s what we are… and everything wrong with accusing or insulting… but stating fact is not insulting. If someone is hyper sensitive they will blow off at ANY opportunity. That is not my issue.
We do meditate on the sounds, including the bowls… if you do it differently – please yourself. This is such an insignificant issue I don’t know why you bring it up..
Water… should NEVER reply based on the first reaction… although the feeling might be right… the objective perception of what’s written will be obscured by that first reaction… that is completely different from intuition, or gut feelings which are consistent and lasting…
How you’ve been dealing with people like us… two hyper sensitive crazy fucks – I don’t know. Thankfully…. I am learning to see the funny side of this sensitivity.
So based on that… I may say more, but right now I don’t feel it. Right now I feel like I’ve had enough.
Puppy… I wish I could meet you in real life…. simply because I’ve never met anyone operating on that same emotional and mental level as myself…
In physical world – it would have been much different. No misinterpretations of – words.
I love you, you crazy fuck.
Good bye.
Hola Ines and P.Puppy,
I was responding from the point of view of Buddhism. Pisces dissolving energy. It would have melted those classifications away to nakedness and eternity. Meaning, maybe I was a whore in my previous life…and that does not go away in my soul, if I am a nun in this one. Since I have the capacity to transform, and change my reality, I won´t limit my soul to “THIS MOMENT” in physical plane and what is happening now since the sum of who I am, probably goes back to being an old soul and I have lived the consequences of my darkness. We go back to the Source and not away from it. Ever expanding and dissolving .
In that perception, feeling universal love, does the Word promiscuous come to your mind, when with a lover and arriving to orgasm? In that world, with that woman? When a woman orgasms with you, do you feel that she is feeling you are promiscuous? Most likely, you would be feeling her love for you . your soul and who you are. I am just imagining really. But since I sometimes see previous lives in the faces of the people I meet, which life to I choose to ignore and which one do I choose to acknowledge?
Any person capable of making you feel that, probably has learned many a sexual lesson and it would be an aberration to think in terms of promiscuity. Especially if she is giving from her heart in that moment. I may be a bunny to you, but I am not that out to lunch.
I am not an expert in sexiness…but tantra….seems very beautiful. As I know that in order find my light, I had to go through the dark, I would feel that a couple would have to go through many things in order to arrive to that orgasmic consciousness.
I don´t seem to be getting all the posts through mail, as I did not see the mail with the poem. But since I know who you are and you know who I am, why would you ever insult me first without trusting that first, and publically? You may have shared your soul, but it seems that mine is non-existant to you. I accept that due to the fact that I am not anywhere near stellium scorpionic energies.
No, you are not married to me – but if you were, you would not get away with what you just said. Unless you would have gotten angry at me, with your clothes off, and me in my best lingerie. Because if I can´t make you remember that special moment of cosmic awareness and soul bonding orgasm, then I would have to accept that it is truly over. And if you would have remembered, there would only be room for love and not accusations.
So…lol…you can see why I don´t really believe it when a man says he loves me.
hey Gatubela…just wanted to say…and I do understand also that it was a conversation between you and Pluto, but it seems there was a misunderstanding .. i really dont think he wouldve said what he said had he known it was addressed to Ness and not to you.He was waiting for you to acknowledge that.I dont understand also why you didn’t back up what you wrote to her? Pluto has always cared for you..cant you see what is happening here? I am surprised by your actions..
sorry i meant to say- addressed to Ness and not to him. (typo)
Hi Umm,
Ohhhhh…I see what is going on now…
Darn slow internet connection. I don´t have internet connection where I live. I use a mobie device, which does not work so well either. I read the posts in my cellphone and not in the forum.
Its because I can´t open the forum – it moves so slowly and just posting a single letter takes for ever because it crashes on me. Scrolling down goes eternally slow too. So I copy paste from .doc, and then it goes faster. Also, some posts don´t get posted either, and get lost in cyberlandia. I am at work now and doing what I shouldn´t do…instead of working really hard. 😉
hmmmm….I seemed to have missed the right reply box…
*blushing*
That’s one very long blush Gatubela..;)
Gatubela… does not need ANYBODY to tell her how she should respond. If she believes and feels I’m bullshitting – she will tell me directly, as she did on many occasions… and I will think about it. I trust her intent towards me explicitly, always have, regardless of any misunderstandings we’ve had.
You’ve stopped growing some time ago… We are worlds apart now.
Detachment in SEEING own and others’ feelings is true. Detachment FROM feeling is THE BIGGEST LIE IN EXISTENCE. The ivory tower of thinking we can stay away from true involvement… from subjectivity of being human.. from showing our true emotional colours… while ‘objectively discussing’ love.. and not DARING to be in that vulnerability.. In that world – we offer the closed hand to another, convinced IN ADVANCE that she/he will never exist. And then – they do not exist. We reap what we saw.
Facts are a stubborn thing… there is NO DIFFERENCE between a baseball bat and words… BOTH KILL, when the intention is such. So facts…
I’m a quadruple Pisces with a Gemini Rising and Aqua Venus.. and Scorpionic Neptune… I am not a ‘NORMAL’ Fish… I feel and perceive BOTH, mental (objectivity) and feeling (subjectivity) planes, in myself and OTHERS. the world that I see and BE in my everyday life – is obscured to people, non existent. Words do not change that, and actions – often get punished. I feel – powerless.. And this has been my agony.
You, dear Gatubela… you are trying to understand the feeling in its primordial state… but the truth is – through your predominantly fire makeup – you do not have the sheer emotional range, capacity and intensity of what flows through me every minute… Cancer Moon is not much help, it’s turned inwards, onto – self, and OTHERS’ states are a mystery to you. No avenue of expressing your heart in this world – is your agony.
And Puppy.. you taught me to step away from subjective reactions and call on my Mind to view those from a distance.. but temper rules your reality… and OBJECTIVITY is what lacks in you… seeing my name in a post automatically causes you to reject it within.. in that sad world, which has no legitimate way of expressing your real self – you are controlled… here is REAL self… this disparity and rejection by others of your true nature – is your agony.
… we’ve come here to find the Truth… and have created the Monster. And I participated in this creation fully, even though my reality is so far removed from it. Bumping Egos (we all have one, you too, Gatubela, yours is selective in its expression).. LYING about who we truly are… about our own humanity.. accusing each other of being SOMETHING, whatever we perceive in another, we ALL HAVE DONE IT. ALL, WITHOUT EXCEPTION.
Get a bloody life. Allow yourselves the full range of being – human. Fucking kindergarten of ‘spiritual’ dogma.. There is NOTHING SPIRITUAL ABOUT THIS LIE. Get your facts straight. Sincerity and openness is in being EMOTIONALLY SEEN, without pretense of being somebody else, without hiding, without preaching about it, without double standards, without condemning another, without being ‘strong’ or ‘weak’, without chasing, without EXPECTING each other to adhere to some fucking standard that exists in our hearts, heads and God know what other parts of our Beings.. WITHOUT BLAME.
Gatubela… I feel grateful for the objectivity of your post, although accusation of insincerity crept in too..
Puppy… you got hurt, and it was my fault partially.. No matter what you say… I am sorry.
I see that my Mercury Sun conjunction is very sharp and lacks compassion.. Words have such incredible power to cause harm, and I didn’t see this power.. people may say they are fine, but it cuts.. and I have to take responsibility for that, to call on its Piscean qualities… and learn how to heal with them instead…
I feel sad, because our ability to communicate in true faith, all of us, is hampered by our subjective perceptions, and this seems to be the fate of Humankind… we would be so much better off without words…
No one ever ‘loses’ in love, because love can never be lost.
You would be better of without words..;) i think they are complicating your life rather than aiding it. missing posts? maybe too many words?
The only monster that has been created is in your judgment. Your judgement is your downfall I believe. Who are you to judge someone’s free expression? Through your fear of outcome and your own insecurities about sex and love you became controlling and tried to shut everything down around you. Like I have said to you before Ness, I know you have been hurt in your life and hurt deeply .When things upset you and you feel like you are going to react and say cutting remarks, maybe you need to stop for a moment and identify the triggers. I don’t want to say this again to you-Treat my friends with RESPECT . thankyou.
Hahaha, Umm.. your ‘loyalty’ will get you brownie points, no doubt.
Innocence of your expression does not equal TRUE honesty of that Scorpio Moon which stews in its desires.. with quiet determination.
What triggers that? Your double standards, darling. “Who are you to judge someone’s free expression?” You got NOTHING out of my post and stepped on that same path. Don’t. Or else, like Puppy.. I will run through your true nature with a laser precision.
I dislike fake people. Don’t be one.
“brownie points”????. ..They are your words and your operating reality. are you completely blind and deaf? everyone wishes you would leave from here. and yet you stay.. to prove what? to earn “brownie points for yourself??” I actually have no wish to fight you. . but the saddest thing is( and this is common for victims of rape and violence) is that you find solace in it.. like you have said so many times..”things fall away..” when there is violence, in words or action, you feel safe in that familiarity.And hence why you keep attacking and provoking and fighting.This is what you have done since you came on here. sure there have been brief moments where you have actually softened and been open to receive and give love, without trying to categorise, judge or fight.and in those moments i have seen a glimpse of your beauty. but too rare a thing and too much crap and just plain nastiness and attacking.not just pluto.. everyone here.im over it
I don’t want to fight you either, Umm… because I don’t want to hurt you.. and would be SO EASY to cut you open. But I am making a choice not to do so.
One thing I would say to you though.. Please don’t pin your ‘victim mentality’ on me.. it is not my reality, and neither is making judgements. You just don’t have a psychological depth necessary to understand things for what they are.
In your two posts you’ve made more judgements about me than I’ve done about you in my entire history here. It will come back to you.. in real life. Trust me on that one.
P.S. Insecurities about sex and love… LOL you have no idea what you are talking about.. from your expression here it would be safe to say that you’ve never EXPERIENCED what it means. Because you can’t.
Whatever floats your boat.. just hope you make a full recovery one day mate. go and get some counselling and get over yourself.
I will quote Gatubela, relevant here…
“It like we have that amnesia every time we react negatively to others and go back to two year old temper tantrums, oral needs, poopy issues etc.”
People take a ‘detached’ view when they are observers. Just watch what happens when they step into the heat… falling back onto conditioned patterns of response…
‘explaining away’ somebody and ‘get help’ are those patterns.. I’m sure Puppy has memories of this one.
Look at the difference between judgement and discernment.. Here I am learning to discern real from acquired in people and myself. So Umm.. your sixteen year old school girl ‘whatever’ will get you… whatever, and nothing more.
In other words… it doesn’t matter how others interact with us. The reflection on US is how we interact with others.
Umm, from own experience… IF you walked away from a conversation (here or elsewhere), especially those with seeds of conflict.. and you are feeling any form of discontent inside…. it means that somewhere in that interaction you were not true, to either yourself or another person…
Soul.. simply knows own truths. It’s magic if we listen intently….
“IF you walked away from a conversation (here or elsewhere), especially those with seeds of conflict.. and you are feeling any form of discontent inside…. it means that somewhere in that interaction you were not true, to either yourself or another person… ”
Who are you trying to fool? Between a bat and word, we have this? So you let the words come out here in order to not manifest latent anger in real life?
How powerful is your mind? With no will, it might not be so good. But with lower intentions, I would have to question the world you are in.
Razor sharp precision in obtaining a person´s true nature as a “threat?” You need the truth in order to not leave latent aggressive energy touching someone´s soul? What would it take for you to “dissolve” into love?
Because unless you are able to kill (give death) with a thought, then there is a world of difference.
latent aggressive energy. exactly right.she needs to find another outlet for her pent up anger instead of here. and preferably where she isn’t being and outright conceited bully.
I don’t feel angry. I feel amused.
What happens here is what’s happening between people out there every day, and they are not aware of this interplay between their psyche and that of others.. the cause and effect of their immediate moods, interactions, decisions, worldly pressures.. when a nasty interaction with a sales assistant in the morning in one side of the city may end up as a divorce thing in the evening in a different part of that city… The domino effect.. the pieces fall, and people fall to pieces, I’ve seen it all now.
“What would it take for you to “dissolve” into love?” – Silence, Gatubela. Where any ‘explanations’ are not necessary.
Hola Ines,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oHiLSBqytX4
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J9oO38BioUM
Instead of just feeling other people´s hearts… why don´t you apply this energy (your heart) in your life? i.e. manifest it. Not just talk it.
When you do, and feel you heart, maybe you will understand why I might not be interested in feeling incredible RANGES of emotions.
Its because not many of them can be applied in our life and manifested in truth. It is interesting that suvival…and therefore, bullying, ignorance, gluttony, selfishness, not striving for empathy, etc. is the via of choice for many people.
That lie hurts the soul too much.
And that is just not a “leo” thingy.
We have three minds – the brain, the heart, and the genitals. They are sources of energy in Chinese medicine. Actually, the kidneys are the source of all energy…which speaks volumes to scorpio I am sure.
Oh…the reason that people loose ojectivity and go for subjective reactions…is because the unity is funcioning in the mind or gentitals. Not the heart.
In the heart, objectivity and subjectivity has the potential to be a divine space…i.e. not ego. They co-exist there as one.
In the genitals, actually, it requires balance and yin and yan energies. The spiritual mind depends on the heart and imbalance
When mind mixes with genitals…or when heart mixes with genitals, it makes a world of difference in what I choose to manifest in my life.
Don´t want you to misunderstand the “genital mind” as something sexual and perverted. You seem to be going there alot lately. Actually, it is not – its housed in the kidneys. And can be found deep in the central abdominal region or the lower tantien.
“Because if I can´t make you remember that special moment of cosmic awareness and soul bonding orgasm, then I would have to accept that it is truly over. And if you would have remembered, there would only be room for love and not accusations.”
True states of sexual interaction are a near religious act of worship, most certainly with a Scorpio man.. it takes hours of flowing where orgasm is not the goal.. and feeling is all… words fail there.
it’s a female energy domain really, from where we reach out.. but it’s only a small part of love.. when one doesn’t walk away no matter what.. in seeing another clearly.. that’s love. If only…
Gatubela.. if you don’t mind me saying…………. THAT turned me on.
I seem to be missing posts too.
A risk.. to take a risk with one’s trust… knowing it may rip one’s soul apart through such intensity of feelings it may leave a scar forever.. and no one will comprehend just how much it hurt.. because some people invest their all into everything they do and are..
But scars.. are where the Light left our souls towards the world, once born inside that gut wrenching Darkness. We should, by right, be proud of those scars, they are a sign of transcendence.. like scars of a man leaving the battlefield…
Nothing is ever lost, even when it may feel like it at times. Only gained, in bravery and the strength of one’s heart.
Gatubela.. I want to tell you something.. remember you said I probably psychologically kick ass in real life? I don’t, but only now I understood why… and why I could here.. because the immediate pain of people that arises from that – is too much for me to bear.. to stand next to the person, look at them, feel that and know that I caused it…
Here… this medium of internet which seemed to make everything so.. removed… because I function better at face to face level where I FEEL people tangibly.. here all got into an upside down mode, without the immediacy of presence, without eyes, hands, faces, voices… Here I’ve learned not only to see intent and feel emotions of others… I’ve learned to feel people’s hearts – through word, something so alien to me, a different universe, or has been..
It is such a privilege to hold one’s heart when it’s given to us in trust.. so precious, it makes us accountable for our conduct and only when we can feel our own.. and your heart was the first one I truly felt, it grew more and more over time.
Without you I would probably still have none, and that’s the truth of your love.
Ines,
Thank you´s are not necessary and not wanted.
I don´t have the ability to give anyone a heart.
on ability to give anyone a heart I will say it with others’ words..
““Love, when it’s present. It brings out the best in us.”
It sure does JoJo. Thanks specifically to the people who are catalysts of it.
The truth of present love.”
I don’t feel that I want or need to manifest anything, and I want nothing from the world. The absolutely BEST things that ever happened – were done from an inside punch, the gut feeling that just won’t go away… yes, there are tangible steps, but the Grace manifests through us in that way..
Thanks for the videos, Gatubela. Valle de la Luna shook me. I’ll die in a place like that… where the Spirit and the solitude are absolute.
I have to go.
The Absolute…
That resonates for some reason, like someone calling my name and trying to wake me up.
It feels like you have the angels cheering you on to continue on one side, while you struggle with yourself, your energies, the good and bad in you, and strive to always find the light.
This kind of energy should be filling you with divine love – moments at first, and not making you want to leave, Ines.
Gatubela,
‘not interested in range of emotions’….. maybe, but I DON’T HAVE A CHOICE. Many of those energies are not mine, suddenly (ALWAYS very suddenly) it arises within, a strong physical feeling… It cannot be predicted, or ‘ordered’ to be.. confirmed occurrences throughout my life, including foreseeing the death of two people… distance or circumstance make no difference, only that the people are important to me in some way.
You… ten minutes before your last post I was calm, suddenly anxiety descended, strong, but very short.. didn’t belong to me, couldn’t understand whose… The energy was yours.. sad and transparent… like a silver light which has both white and grey.. no black in it.
Umm.. it was very heavy, like a kick, it made me shot up from the seat.. I first thought it was Puppy’s, even said ‘What now, I’ve done nothing? Please stop’.. but within a minute knew it wasn’t him, just connected to Cool.. it felt like a dark dark glue..
Puppy.. like a very fast and strong whirlpool, with anger, but clean, not at all malicious or cloudy.. like the energy of the Niagara fall; on a few occasions it had nothing to do with me, but his own stuff… one of which was like rocks falling off the side of the mountain.. heavy and sudden.
All that energy besides my own. When I said I’m hyper sensitive…. I WENT THROUGH HELL here. Call it meridians.. astrological processes.. neuro-endocrinal system.. angels and demons.. the many levels of explanation, none even close to explaining this. I never talk about it in physical life.
Right now Divine Love doesn’t feel like an endless stream of joy, just an unconditional ACCEPTANCE of all that BE, everything that arises. It doesn’t feel ‘good’ or ‘bad’ somehow, just – COMPLETE. it’s like I don’t exist anymore, and in that I’ve become all that is..
Gatubela… we belong to the Cosmos. Everything in it that happens – is a cry for Love (complete, no separation Being). That’s the bottom line of us, and my true nature.
xx
Hmmmm…am trying to feel you…Its like you feel the bad about people – and react with the bad in you?
Thats the thingy with people – you can´t apply them or the energy they are…in your life because its “them” and not “you”. It will lead to an incredbile crash of energies.
Hmmm..before I posted, I went to starbucks to buy a coffee and then had a meeting. I did not feel anxiety – to my knowledge. Maybe you are picking up my yin energies? I am usually all over the place so…
What frequency are you tuned into? Are you tuned into “the all of me?” cosmos thingy?
Sounds like you are into the yin connection. But essential energy is both Yin and Yang (for lack of a better word in order to communicate a concept). And Yang is the Divine – fire – masculine energy.
But as I said, that energy is in the cosmos. I mean, it might seem like a cry for love, but you also have to love back silly!
Its hard talking to a person who feels the cosmos, but still is a limp fishy in it.
Sent from my Nokia phone
Im sorry Pluto I should’ve listened to you at the start. You were right, back in your post 1307. This forum has taken a nosedive since she first came on in her post in 1223.It used to be an open forum where many people came on and wrote and it was diverse and interesting. Now it is just one angry confused woman throwing hand grenades and manipulating and trying to pick fights and dominate. I guess this is a perfect example of an online troll/ bully.
Umm, I shouldn’t have threatened you, that is true.. I do have the capacity to ‘kill’ now, an unfortunate side effect of my interaction with Puppy, because I’ve learned to see the internal movements of people with precision. And I will be honest – it was very tempting. But it’s not who I am.
And I can’t ‘bully’ you if you are a strong woman. Nobody can if you feel that inside.
What falls away… is desire to ‘win’ at any cost. I’ll leave it at that.
You don’t have a clue who you are, and you are so far removed from “seeing the internal movements of people with precision”.Ha! what a joke .. You are so deluded .You speak like some grotesque ego driven alien monster from a sci fi book. A conceited alien monster with a stack of self help books by your bed which you imagine yourself on the covers of. You ARE sick, like Pluto has said, like Gatubela has said, and you are so deep in denial its like a permanent fog around your fuzzy head. You are rude, insulting and get off on twisting people’s words and then throwing it back to them with arrogant self adulation.And then when the shit hits the fan and people stand up for themselves and get angry you just love it, then use that in your sick demented way to try to point out what your delusion thinks are “similarities”, so you dont feel so alone in your internal rage.There are no similarities.You haven’t offered any love on this forum. Only manipulation.You have just been taking and taking and using like a parasite since day one.You are one greedy little bitch who doesnt give a damn about anyone other than herself. Oh and in case you forgot during one of your confused rants about yourself..this is a forum about Scorpio men. You know NOTHING about them.You ARE a bully and a troll. It has nothing to do with my strength, i know of my own strength and don’t need to constantly seek outside validation. Internet online bullies and trolls are everywhere. You are just the classic example.
See… latent pent up anger and rage was not mine. That’s who you are.
Now, this is absolute truth on my son’s name.. two minutes before this appeared, I felt this yuk energy suddenly come up from absolutely nowhere, and again, it was not mine. So I came up here and saw your little torpedo.. there is so much truth in the fact that we are all interconnected.. and it’s very physical for those who can feel it, and I wish it was bullshit, but it’s not…
So how are you feeling right now? Our buttons always get pushed in that outside world, Umm. I wish people stopped damaging themselves and others in this way, because I’ve earned this understanding the hard way.
You can smile at me when all is pretty.. talk music and art.. when I know what you will do when things get rough. My hunches are never off.
Share your ‘love’ with those who deserve it. I don’t want it.
Hey Umm…we can get back to topic …
Hmmmm…scorpio men…
yeah.
I worked with a scorpio moon and scorpio mercury recently. He left and went to another company.
Interesting how you do not see the scorpio moon part. But he had the reputation of being very spiritual and calm. Libra sun.
Actually, it was pretty amazing how I did not have to talk to him in order to teach him the trade. With what he learned, he got a new job (sigh…i know…more bah bah bah). And now, I got called for referancing because the darn guy applied to another one! He had an interesting way to make his reality happen and he always said that he was getting down due to boredom.
He is married to a virgo lady – which I met. But she also has that severe depression thingy. He did not show that it was hard for him to handle, since he is very patient.
Now, I am surrounded by taurus and virgo colleagues at work.
LoL…he said that when he got mad though, he really got mad (he also has jupiter in scorpio too). His sarcasm was awful and he usually said hurtful things.
When he practised english, most of it would be insults . Instead of asking me, “Are you bored?”..He would say, “You are boring?”. (*cat scratch)
LoL..at least he did not start a third world war at his new job, where he has to speak all the time.
Good for him.sounds like he has guts and similar to a true scorp isnt afraid to speak the truth.Three planets in Scorpio..he would be feeling the effects of Pluto for sure, even with his Libran sun.
Scorpio men value respect and integrity, and will treat those who value this with the same, words arent used lightly , they will defend and protect themselves and those they love if there is any wrongdoing. They actually tolerate alot more than what most people think, but they can only take so much bullshit from others..( and their own)
Sounds like yor ex colleague has a gd dry/dark sense of humour.. lol ‘you are boring’..cute.
The thing is Gatubela, that Scorpio men really do honour integrity..yes they can say hurtful things , but they also forgive, if they are given absolute deep sincerity and true loving at the start , and the other has demonstrated the courage to transform and be open to growth and be true and continues to do so. it never stops , until it stops..
If we know another in integrity and love – we trust that their intentions towards us are pure in every moment of interaction. In that space we step back and allow the truth to unfold naturally, without going for the ‘kill’ in a misguided self preservation attempt.. The consistency of values (integrity) across ALL situations makes us unable to look the other way..
Umm, Puppy will drink out of your vessel of nebulous womanhood, but…. at a
distance. The reasons are still obscure to you, and I will say no more.
Your kind of ‘love’ has become alien to me.
Gatubela, the ‘genital mind’ FEELS.. and if you were ever looking into a man’s eyes while in the throes of an orgasmic energy… you will understand that what turned me on was the integrity of your answer, not an overdeveloped sacral chakra.
The Matriarchal Mother Goddess lives on in all of us, despite hundreds of thousands of years in destruction and abuse…. and throughout our personal histories.
Hello Ines,
I was not writing to turn anyone on.
A guy´s lower tantien is different from a woman´s. Its sexy but also an active force of nature.
Maybe I am not getting the energy right. When I see the kama sutra, its like a conflict between doing cartwheels and pleasure. I mean – its just seems so distant and not like he is sharing with her. Each to their own pleasure.
Its seems so cold.
Sorry Ines,
I was wrong about the kama sutra thingy too.
Its meditation….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eg-_CoF2hPI&list=RD02VutXr-cn6TQ
It made me cry.
Its not an experience I am sharing but I do understand meditation. I mean, more stillness in combat meditation – facing death. Not sexual meditation and well…facing death.
Sorry for any disrespect.
It’s OK, Gatubela… I know your heart.
The act of love making is Meditation too, yes.. I’ve experienced it. Yes, with a Scorpio man. Being who we both are.. we’ve given it our all, to the last breath.. Not sure he understood the meaning of it all, except saying he’s never had anything like it in his life. Me neither. And it wasn’t at all about gymnastics. It was soul bonding in timelessness. What happens after – has absolutely no relevance to that.
Not many people understand this healing energy. I’ll always treasure it.
Can’t post anymore, my computer CPU is too old to process the script.
http://news.yahoo.com/video/fast-fabulous-nascars-first-female-061340649.html
I love these kinds of women… happy, bouncy, non-agenda, non-vulgar, an independent with a life of her own, and flat out sexy. Just great energy, innocence and a lovable, adorable soul.
No doubt she has Mars sexual energy bursting within her. But it’s about ‘how’ she uses that aggressiveness in her being. I could’t imagine this woman leading any guy on or manipulating for narcissistic motives. Her sincerity and honesty is deeply sexy to me.;)
It’s the unseen.
she’s a firecracker! amazing how fast she was with that gun..
I saw some other videos of her as well –
Am not in the habit of looking at a person because a guy mentions that it is sexy. It did not seem like the right reasons.
She does Olympic weightlifting – not so much for competition as I can see that she goes under her clean and jerk too high and does not duck under it, once weight is at knee level. But I liked that about her.
Hello, Neat post. There is an issue together with your site in internet explorer, might check this?
IE still is the market leader and a big portion of other
people will leave out your wonderful writing due to this problem.
Hello xbox,
I found out that firefox with a fast internet connection, works for opening the forum.
…and…do you have any experiences to share?
Its like you read my mind! You seem to know a lot
about this, like you wrote the book in it or something.
I think that you can do with a few pics to drive the message home
a little bit, but instead of that, this is excellent blog.
A great read. I’ll definitely be back.
Hello Nancy!!
Can you share some of your experiences?
We would all love to hear them!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on xbox one controller.
Regards
I love it whenever people get together and share opinions.
Great blog, keep it up!
You too… and I will.
That energetic incident gave me a hair raising sense that holographic reality of our individual consciousness is truly a transfusion of an infinite greater state, of which we are multiple reflections.. we are not here to merely live in comfortable corporeality… too many signs..
There were roughly 108 billion people that ever walked this Earth.. and how many souls? Can’t quite get to grips with this feeling yet.. but something is telling me that liberation doesn’t come to us through Life….
Not the Sun (Ego) was worshiped for millions of years, for once humanity connected the miracle of birth to the act of coitus.. the fertility of the female in the Moon cycles that coincide perfectly with 28 days of a woman’s menstruation.. The absolute sacredness of human life, for it was short and born to Death – elevated the Luna to the status of Goddess.. The ‘betrothed’ matriarch didn’t exist, the equanimity of a truly egalitarian state of Mind and Body…
And now.. the tribal rhythm of the past in contrast to the repeating story of modern ‘love’..
youtube.com/watch?v=8UVNT4wvIGY
I don’t even understand how I finished up right here, however I thought this put up was good. I don’t recognise who you are
but definitely you’re going to a well-known blogger for those who aren’t already.
Cheers!
Hi Martin…
Hmmmm…any experiences to share?
What did you like about the blog?
I am writing fast before this goes, if it does… pisceans are ‘guilt tripped’ big time into do do do, then the fears come, coz we start believing we are not convenient for this world somehow, we are not living this life how it ‘should’ be.. according to those who are constantly running about and making themselves exhausted, and then dumping it on us, and we look and wonder.. do you actually LIVE your life? and it’s like talking two different languages, always has been… That’s how this Piscean spent her life… feeling guilty that she doesn’t want to run the rat race… making half arsed bodily movements to do it, yet feeling inside like an impostor… Well, I DON’T HAVE TO LOL..expressed Light… Light is not about positivity.. Light is all that is… in which we are, there are NO WORDS to describe this shift… the reality is already – HERE, and the urge comes up not because we want something, but because our own being tells us.. here is the ‘laziness’ of the ultimate order.. THERE IS NOWHERE TO RUN AND NOTHING TO WANT. Just STOP.
How beautiful this is.. Pisceans do not make ‘to do’ lists, the idea is just ridiculous to us.. and most don’t wear watches… now I see why hahahaha.. a true connection to that which I AM.. the reality of Being – in being of right now, there is no time there, that’s why…. how utterly simple. How difficult it has been to get to FEEL it, in all its simplicity…
And the Truth is.. we know NOTHING. And never will LOL because once we ‘know’ – it shifts, that’s the nature of true reality. IT ALWAYS SHIFTS. An illusion is in BELIEVING it static and to our disposal. We cannot KNOW, but we have the KNOWING Fuck, words fail here, words MEAN NOTHING here… Even Death – fails here and becomes NOTHING, hahaha!!! Everything becomes nothing and nothing becomes everything thast’s the surrender
“THERE IS NOWHERE TO RUN AND NOTHING TO WANT”…
Am writing alot today…lol…its because of the firefox browser!
Well…I would “want” terminate some of the stuff you mention in the mail. I mean, the knowing nothing, the guilt, or doing things half arsed.
Death does not fail in “nothing” – I mean, thats only the tip of the deadly iceberg. Its an energy, Ines, that expresses itself. Or rather, it expresses itself through energetic depletion of life. It needs life to exist, in order for it to do the deed.
The illusion for me, is the manifestation of energy, but not the energy itself. That´s why God is important here – (not religion). How can you surrender to the nothing – if death and life and karma (soul energy) must also exist and vibrate and be perceived by you ?
And….surrendering without love?
Wonderful goods from you, man. I’ve understand your stuff previous to and you are just extremely great. I really like what you’ve acquired here, really
like what you are saying and the way in which you say it.
You make it enjoyable and you still take care of to keep it smart.
I can not wait to read far more from you. This is actually a wonderful website.
Hello Breast Activites,
Any experiences that you would like to share with us…like….yourself? 😉
It gets a bit hot at times, but we all are better people for sharing and caring.
Hi Umm…
Can you send the link without the “www.” ?
No.Just search for it if you are interested, its not that hard.You’ll find it on youtube.
For me it is.
I receive forum posts in cellphone, in which these videos dont run from the way you posted it. And I erased the email, as it takes space, thinking I could see it directly in the forum. However, it won´t open and you did not indicate the subject, or name of video or any information for searching.
Actually, I don´t know if it applies to other forum readers, but I made a mistake, its without the Https. Then, it opens automatically in a cellphone.
If you change your mind, I would appreciate at least search criteria.
If not, then not much else to say.
ok…i didnt know know you werent able to view the title. its called earthlings, its a documentary narrated by joaquin phoenix. it runs for half an hour maybe so i think too long to play on a ph? – im not sure.It’s not really light viewing.. its confronting, you may not want to watch it. i just copy and paste the url address in the share box that comes up in you tube. 🙂
Hi again Umm…
Wrong again…lol…going through some mails with videos on them.
Am busy investigating and was left with the doubt.
If the link is posted like this:
It opens in a cell phone. So posts can be opened in real time. For example, I receive many of your posts when I am at work – and this means I have to go home, (with crappy internet connection since I live near the mountains and dont have fiber optics) open up my mail and copy paste the link in the post mail. By the time that happens, there could have been many replies and I would have missed the original post.
Am not an expert on these things – maybe someone can also comment?
Arrrgh – wrong again!!!…maybe someone can help me? What is the format that can be used, so that it opens in a cellphone?
Maybe it is without http?
OK..thank you Umm.
But…can you also please give search criteria as well with future mails?
Copying link means I have to wait until I get home. In this case, 12 hours later !…and I am a very curious cat and sometimes I just need to have a peek at the post…just to see what it is about, at least, as soon I receive the mail.
Will watch video –
Yes!!! I found out what works for me…its without the http for my phone.
Meowie!!!
Hello Umm,
Its about animal abuse and the slaughter industry?
I actually saw the process in a slaughter house. Actually, its different.
Animals that have undergone too much suffering, have low quality meat. The muscle fibers tighten and stay contracted if they are killed in that state. In order to prevent this, they would have to detach a nerve, which of course, is not possible in a cow in a slaughter house. Therefore, it will be tough or hard with low selling value. No client wants that. I am sure that if this was not an issue, they probably would be tortured.
They are left in a pasture or grazing area for around 2 or 3 days, then they file up, and they are electrocuted with a gun that hits the brain.
It is instantaneous, as I saw, as they verified the animal was dead before skinning. A veterinarion is on standby as well. They check the liver under a microscope in order to verify that there are no parasites or bacterial infection.
They have ISO 9000 quality management systems here as well, which are auditted every year. As the Japanese will not import any meat that does not meet their standards in quality as well. So…no quality system, no international clients.
That does not take away the suffering they go through before slaughter.
For milking goats, actually, those goats run wild in the mountains, and are milked once a day. Slaughtering means letting the animal bleed through a cut in the artery. I can say that chilean farmers use all of the animal – to feed the other animals, and the blood is gobbled up by carnivorous chickens. Did not know they were so blood thirsty.
For sheep, they are also let wild in the mountains.
Even horses are left to go wild in the mountains, and they come down to eat and drink once a day.
I feel chickens have it the worst here.
But of course, animal abuse happens here and everywhere and it is awful to see. Converting to vegan diets would mean that the industry would increase virally and cancerously in demand on that side, and the vegetables / fruits etc. we eat, would be genetically engineered, pesticide ridden and depleting nutrients to the soul. It would be “soil abuse”. Eventually, it leads to aquafir contamination too.
LoL…even the sun energy absorbers, who have not eaten in years, and just absorb sun qi, will be having problems with their food source , due to ozone layer.
Thank you Umm –
Hi Umm,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TeIO4z5oenk
He talks in spanish – about pranic consciousness, and has not eaten or drank anything in four years. He claims that there is no such thing as not eating, but on the state of awareness where love is the only form of expression. He says he has no attachments, but is not separate from anything.
So…he wont even eat a plant or drink water.
I do see that he wears clothes though.
Anyways, people can do incredible things as they master their energy. Its just that this knowledge seems so lost. How come we are not born like this – with these levels of consciousness?
As extreme as it seems, he gives his REAL solution to the problem, which is developing himself and his soul.
Thanks Gatubela,
the video you put up was in different language, spanish i am guessing so i did a search and found another interview with him with english subtitles. Interesting.A gentle soul. And he was a violin player before.. and would have what he called transmissions.. out of body/mind almost experiences.. i can relate to that as I have had that when I play music. It was interesting hearing him talk about when he was a child..and how the feeling was very different fro him when he was alone ( which he spent alot of time) to when he was around other children, and he wouldnt talk with them but only needed to feel them, energetlcally. In other terms he could be seen as introverted, which again I can relate to.. the feeling of preferring solitude to large numbers of people, to needing alone time to reflect and become whole again.not needing to talk alot.( although sometimes the opposite is true for me depending on mood and company).Victor found a connection..to the divine.. triggered by his music perhaps? by a memory…he has in his eyes that thing I have seen occasionally… its a knowing. As far as him not eating at all, he does eat, but can go without for periods of a time. Which,,, if we were still living wildly would probably happen.Animals as well in the wild go without food for a few days sometimes.. in some ways it keeps them more alive.. to get hungry to hunt again with vigour and passion.We , as a human species are generally speaking fat and lazy and disconnected. To see people such as Victor with that amount of willpower is very appealing to me. Funny though how the media often sensationalises people who step outside of the square..they are boxed and categorised out of fear ” the man who doesnt eat.. the man who didnt eat for 3 years” if he didnt eat for three years i am pretty sure he would be dead. By eating less he is preserving life on earth too..
maybe one day a virus will knock out half the population of humans on earth. that would be helpful i think. too many people. If animals werent farmed for meat then there would be more space for vegetables. gmo? yeh well if fucking monsanto have their way we are pretty screwed really. maybe cancer will be the ultimate killer.. it is already doing a pretty good job.but with pesticide poisoning reaching new heights and human tampering.. maybe we will just get wiped out even faster. Or.. we could as human race CHOOSE not to breed as much as we do, we could CHOOSE not to eat meat, we could CHOOSE not to eat genetically modified food and not support companies like Monsanto. its up to us. the cost of feeding cattle is a thousand times more than tending to a veggie crop.Personally I think apathy is one of the biggest killers of our human race..the destruction of our soul.
I just recently made the choice to not buy any soap, shampoo, detergent,cosmetics or foods that have palm oil in them.I did some research on the internet and found quite a few manufacturers that don’t use palm oil .They have consciously made the decision to save the lives of the orang-utans,, tigers, elephants,and all the other creatures that inhabit those forests that are currently being obliterated for humans vile consumption.
if companies like this can stay true if demand increases and the consumers can keep it real.. no pedestals, no holier than thou, keeping true and keeping consumption low.. then we have a chance at healing as a human race. and this is just a snippet.things multiply from there. just not people. too many people. the earth doesn’t want or need any more people. the nourishing and nurturing needs are now changing as we evolve as human beings .or at least try to!
Gatubela you asked ” How come we are not born like this – with these levels of consciousness?” I believe we are. look at a baby.. its there. You had it, i had it we all had it .. maybe we just forgot. Maybe it is weedled out of them by their parents lack of consciousness , by lack of love by their caregivers. when did this stop them..? if it is the ripple effect , the herd .. the domino then we have to make a definitive conscious decision to cut the umbilical tie and do it different. when did it begin?/ i wonder this all the time. We are all going to die and as soon as we come to terms with this the better off we are going to be as individuals in this so called collective world we live in. it is actually really simple . we complicate everything so much. intellectualise, categorise, and words are powerful it is true and through the words given just like music can at some point lead to a breakthrough into the ‘other”.. so words are just a tool. a container to break though. babies dont know words, dont need them they were fine without them, but then they are given words.. and the confusion starts as they are given more and more to ultimately have to breakthough.i see so many people trying to make / find meaning out of everything..( I do it too). everything must have signficance, importance, meaning..( hence birth of the pedestal and birth of the herd and breakdown of awareness). maybe there is no meaning . and that is the meaning!
Thanks Gatubela,
the video you put up was in different language, spanish i am guessing so i did a search and found another interview with him with english subtitles. Interesting.A gentle soul. And he was a violin player before.. and would have what he called transmissions.. out of body/mind almost experiences.. i can relate to that as I have had that when I play music. It was interesting hearing him talk about when he was a child..and how the feeling was very different fro him when he was alone ( which he spent alot of time) to when he was around other children, and he wouldnt talk with them but only needed to feel them, energetlcally. In other terms he could be seen as introverted, which again I can relate to.. the feeling of preferring solitude to large numbers of people, to needing alone time to reflect and become whole again.not needing to talk alot.( although sometimes the opposite is true for me depending on mood and company).Victor found a connection..to the divine.. triggered by his music perhaps? by a memory…he has in his eyes that thing I have seen occasionally… its a knowing. As far as him not eating at all, he does eat, but can go without for periods of a time. Which,,, if we were still living wildly would probably happen.Animals as well in the wild go without food for a few days sometimes.. in some ways it keeps them more alive.. to get hungry to hunt again with vigour and passion.We , as a human species are generally speaking fat and lazy and disconnected. To see people such as Victor with that amount of willpower is very appealing to me. Funny though how the media often sensationalises people who step outside of the square..they are boxed and categorised out of fear ” the man who doesnt eat.. the man who didnt eat for 3 years” if he didnt eat for three years i am pretty sure he would be dead. By eating less he is preserving life on earth too..
maybe one day a virus will knock out half the population of humans on earth. that would be helpful i think. too many people. If animals werent farmed for meat then there would be more space for vegetables. gmo? yeh well if friggin monsanto have their way we are pretty screwed really. maybe cancer will be the ultimate killer.. it is already doing a pretty good job.but with pesticide poisoning reaching new heights and human tampering.. maybe we will just get wiped out even faster. Or.. we could as human race CHOOSE not to breed as much as we do, we could CHOOSE not to eat meat, we could CHOOSE not to eat genetically modified food and not support companies like Monsanto. its up to us. the cost of feeding cattle is a thousand times more than tending to a veggie crop.Personally I think apathy is one of the biggest killers of our human race..the destruction of our soul.
I just recently made the choice to not buy any soap, shampoo, detergent,cosmetics or foods that have palm oil in them.I did some research on the internet and found quite a few manufacturers that don’t use palm oil .They have consciously made the decision to save the lives of the orang-utans,, tigers, elephants,and all the other creatures that inhabit those forests that are currently being obliterated for humans vile consumption.
if companies like this can stay true if demand increases and the consumers can keep it real.. no pedestals, no holier than thou, keeping true and keeping consumption low.. then we have a chance at healing as a human race. and this is just a snippet.things multiply from there. just not people. too many people. the earth doesn’t want or need any more people. the nourishing and nurturing needs are now changing as we evolve as human beings .or at least try to!
crap i just wrote heaps and lost the lot cos my internet connection went down. ha how ironic.
i will try again.
Gatubela you asked ” How come we are not born like this – with these levels of consciousness?” I believe we are. look at a baby.. its there. You had it, i had it we all had it .. maybe we just forgot. Maybe it is weedled out of them by their parents lack of consciousness , by lack of love by their caregivers. when did this stop them..? if it is the ripple effect , the herd .. the domino then we have to make a definitive conscious decision to cut the umbilical tie and do it different. when did it begin?/ i wonder this all the time. We are all going to die and as soon as we come to terms with this the better off we are going to be as individuals in this so called collective world we live in. it is actually really simple . we complicate everything so much. intellectualise, categorise, and words are powerful it is true and through the words given just like music can at some point lead to a breakthrough into the ‘other”.. so words are just a tool. a container to break though. babies dont know words, dont need them they were fine without them, but then they are given words.. and the confusion starts as they are given more and more to ultimately have to breakthough.i see so many people trying to make / find meaning out of everything..( I do it too). everything must have signficance, importance, meaning..( hence birth of the pedestal and birth of the herd and breakdown of awareness). maybe there is no meaning . and that is the meaning!
sorry for the repeat posts.. there was a delay on one from my own doing.
Hi Umm,
You mean going from it as that end – not supporting the companies. People in the city will always have the desire to consume, Umm. There won´t be anyway around it. If it comes down to it, killing is justifiable for that greater good. Going deeper into that, means war between love motivated people and “them”. And those fuckers have the institutions and fire power created to attend these kinds of needs.
LoL…I actually did study cultures, and change. And, of course, I tried t olive it. It is not posible as a long term energy, because it has as its Source energy – the need. Its actually the lack of being able to choose. If you look at Victor, he has the capacity to choose – because he has Access to both kinds of energy. What he did, is choose one over the other. Its a true choice. And if his life were in danger, it might be another. If he had warrior energy as his source, he would battle.
And, it won´t matter how many Victors there are, a bullet still kills him. Does he have the capacity to see that bullet before it does?
A man or woman who is absolutely crazy for someone is it because of sexual attraction, or can we choose over appetites, and love still? I understand this kind of love because it reflects the concept of karma, balance and completion. LoL…we all will have to get dirty once we reach “nirvana”…because of what we see when we are there. That connection is so powerful…so transformative, that it wounds the soul.
As a scorpio, you will dig down to see how can this suffering end? I did that too. How to END it. It meant years of consciously preparing myself spiritually with honourable intent…in order to even consider success. Because it is a loosing battle as we speak. And I would be dead before I put a step out the door. So, in a sense, we are only chatting about illusion.
And…it comes down to the fact that my intentions had to be more honourable and on the same level as the others were bad and manifested. And manifest it as well. So…love your enemies.
So…slavery and its opposite…Or rather, the exact opposite of what they were. It is the deeper truth in “turning the other cheek”. It has nothing to do with forgiveness…or letting it happen.
Only then, do the collective barrier energies loose hold…and the light can be seen. It will never cause harm…as harm was never the intention.
So yes Umm…IT ALL HAS MEANING.
This is a piscean secret too. But scorpio holds this domain, once this balance is acheived.
If we have access to light and dark (again for lack of a better way of wording), only then can we choose, over our needs. The choice will come as energetic manifestion and reality transforming. Verrrry magical. We can literally transform reality through transforming ourselves.
Everything is illusion and everything is in a state of flux. This is what i know to be true and it is not something that I am seeking proof of.The same can be said for nothing.These are the only absolutes.
“Meaning” is just a term to create a sense of ego separation and place a scale of value and use.
As a human being on this planet earth I feel a responsibility, that’s all. I feel a connection with the natural, physical world.I also feel a connection with the non physical world.The unseen world. The two are not separate for me.If i am passionate about injustice it is because I love.
For me, meaning is the energy that traspasses Nothing….or traspasses ALL.
Where they both meet.
Fire seen in darkness and death….it only means one thing
Darkness seen in light…it only means one thing…
And that has value to me. Its not ego.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTtmW3s7CHM
For those moments alone with the moon…and the sun…
And for Ines…instead of taking energy from people, maybe you can learn from the moon and sun instead by absorbing these beautiful energies directly.
For every cycle..absorb the energy and bring it to your forhead…then to your heart, and then to your lower abdomen.
Nature teaches generously.
Gatubela, I don’t take energy from anyone in physical life, a hundred people will attest to that.
Don’t you feel that we need to stay with our feelings, and the closer we get, the deeper they take us? It’s like every emotion has a million shades, depending on its origin.. When I feel what I feel… I write, I play, I go inside myself, I cycle out into the hills, I make myself a norishing meal, I meditate… This body here was designed to feel ALL, and it probably knows more about life than I do.
I love nineteenth century buildings converted to apartments.. old moldings that miss pieces, paint peeling off.. stairwell steps worn out in the middle by generations.. handrails touched by thousands.. the junk left by people on the stairs… so flawed in this grunge it’s almost perfect. Flawed Perfection.
My computer really freaks out on this forum, the end must be nearing LOL
I contacted Craig and asked him to break this into pages.. it’s really just one tick in the wordpress dashboard.. if not.. I’m struggling with posting, so yeah..
and there is God.. we are taken care of in those moments when everything seems to slide.. and then magic happens.. the Light, it’s as if you are pulled away from the cliff edge ooo don’t know except Let Go and Let God..
I am just so happy, because it is QUALITATIVELY different to everything as was… like… I have the power? Over me? Don’t know how to convey it.
Don’t know if this will post, tried before a dozen times, and it times out…
Gatubela, I am sooo happy… it resonated on so many levels, you truly get it, and I feel so much love for this.
Yes, it’s an illusion, but in a way it’s not.. it CONTRIBUTES to individual transformation, to taking us into the real of who we are at the very BASIC level, and isn’t it worth it then, the ‘fuckers’ will always be there, and fuck them, because that which we are BECOMING, getting closer with each passing day, week, year – cannot be taken away. Nirvana, once it arrives, shows the most horrible state of affairs in which we live, and we GO BACK into the world with this knowledge, and things become both easier AND harder.
So yes, it ALL has a meaning.. this nurture of individual Spirit from the true core is Umm’s choice, manifestation of who she is.. and what she feels
passionately about, for she comes from Earth, she IS Earth.. it doesn’t matter if it changes the course of events on a collective level, not at all. It
matters that she expresses her being in the way which is her truth, from the heart. That’s all that matters, and Victor made that choice as an expression of his being too, not everyone is a warrior to battle the collective Subconscious, but everyone has capacity to battle their own, and that’s a start.
That man in the mirror is staring right back, that’s his call to lose the state of slavery, where the suffering ends.
Could not feel it with Cancer moon.
But then the silence came….
ooops…butted into a conversation…
Sorry about that.
Umm thank you for being you. I know you are gentle soul. If you plan on driving down here someday, we should go and watch a play, that’s if you like theatre? Enjoy the beautiful full moon tonight;
Hi…..yes I do. That sounds nice))
Have you ever considered creating an e-book or guest authoring on other sites?
I have a blog based upon on the same subjects you discuss and would love
to have you share some stories/information. I know my audience would enjoy your work.
If you’re even remotely interested, feel free to send me an e-mail.
Planets too aggressive at the moment. Challenging scorpions.
To clarify…
Planets make UNCONSCIOUS humans… do as they do… in their animal existence–> e.g… ‘finger me’.. slithering at the bottom of a septic tank waiting to extort any innocent person, any good-willed people. THAT BEHAVIOR…that soulless existence, is everywhere. Taking. Sucking.
A human wrote that message above. It was not concocted by a ghost. No wonder society hangs people like me.
Planets in astrology do not ‘make us’. Meaning planets ARE NOT A RATIONAL EXCUSE why people think and behave the way they do.
A persons evolution..means –>> the sou level of consciousness and the wisdom gained from extreme inner and outer experiences –>> Their worldliness. The capacity to love. I said love.
Not to deceive and manipulate to survive like a cockroach.
Evolution does not mean what or where the planets are in signs everyday.
Evolution MEANS –>> THE AGE OF THE SOUL… in this physical body. The knowing of what is not.
How old is a soul??…. Well I ask you… How old is the Earth? …. That’s how old a soul can be.
This means… the soul we ARE, regardless of ones existential level ‘was with us’ BEFORE we popped out of our mothers womb.
Old souls have consciousness, have fearlessness and loving sensitivity that baby souls will never know or understand.;)
Old souls die, they know death… and then they…well,you get the picture.;)
Once last thing.
Notice how an innocuous post, the way in which it is expressed by ‘finger me’ comes across??
This is the subtlety and power OF ILLUSION I have been vehemently hoping people would see and understand in others but mostly IN themselves.
Illusion… meaning the people who manifest darkness. Darkness? … again.. is the material greed and hunger to dominate other people through DECEIT!
Mothers do it. Rich people do it. Poor people do it. White people do it. Green people do it. Corruption is faceless, classless and void of love.
Again… look how ‘nice’ and ‘friendly’ finger me sounds??
This type of deceit IS EVERYWHERE among human animals who think material dominance is power.
Ahh. I give up.;)
I agree PLuto, “finger me ” can finger off..go and find his/her own hand. ha. Perfect example of the parasitical behaviour so prevalent in the world today. All comes down to the dollar and the stupid people who yes operate using deceit .Stupid, lazy people who cant think for themselves and want to sap the living daylights out of someone else and brand it as their own as they are devoid. soul sapping snakes ( no offence to snakes) no i will re word, soul- less ghosts who linger on this earth in human form with selfish intent and no sense of morals.there are hundreds of them. thousands. and damned if i would ever want them on my ice-cream.or anything. and they lurk.. behind the scenes.. behind every huge corporation.. and people go on their merry way with their daily sticking their heads in the sand and are too afraid to speak their minds, too gutless to do whats right, because they want to make sure their hair stays unruffled and they keep as many friends as they can.. lets not step on anyones toes- lets all run and hide! and pretend none of it even exists!! ba! yeah right. self deceit. people are so ignorant! we are fed lies from the minute we step out the door. and yet the majority turn the other way. .while it seeps into their being where it is ignored and becomes black so then seep back out as more blackness.. one big black muck to have to wade through. these people are more interested in the so called sunny side of life as they see it, they want it spoon fed and handed to them on a silver platter, with a gleaming new shiny car that will lose half its value after a year, in the form of an entire new wardrobe of clothing up to date with the latest fashions ,a shitload of gadgets, phones,computers that they think makes them look cool.. in the form of “fun times” and ” happy vibes” its all become a friggin commodity. dont people see it??! its one huge marketing ploy.. and a very sneaky, underhanded, and manipulative way to groom people into not asking questions, to become so familiar with what is fed to them as of course it makes them feel GOOD.. so why are they going to question that? they believe in it like its their life blood.meanwhile, they are being stripped of ability to fight. to defend truth.to see truth. they become blind and ultimately ignorant..it just feeds on itself.. all these idiots are just fingerless fukwits with no brain and no conscience.
Umm… haha.. the fight is coming out in you. You are seeing the truth among us. I remember a couple of years ago I wrote a creative post here mentioning that..”I slay dopey dragons all day, and in my spare time, rescue damsels in distress”.
Even though that post was creative, it was far.. faaar from bullshit. Every anecdote I give has truth within it. I literally have to dumb-it-down to people all day long, or there would be no understanding.
A short story, it’s titled;
Giving
I was walking in suburbia the other day, it was beautifully bright and fresh outside. As I was walking by one particular house , there were two adults standing out the front talking, and a little boy about 3 years old.
The parents were talking and watching their child when suddenly, as I approached their front yard, the child picked a little flower from the grass and lifted it high to the light with his little arms extended, looking up at me and motioning his intention that his flower was for me. He was two feet away from me, mumbling in baby language, and as he was offering the little flower, the parents had a nervous laugh at him and his suggestion. My heart melted. I stopped, I smiled at him and accepted the flower from his little hand and said “thank you, how precious”.
As I was accepting the gift from this child, his parents were saying “No!”…as if it were a ‘stupid’ thing to offer a complete stranger.
In that 6 or 7 second moment, of feeling this child’s immortal gift to me, I knew his parents were IGNORANT OF LOVE ENERGY. Their intellectual concerns of ‘being embarrassed’ consumed them. So they laughed at what their child was doing, like it meant nothing and was nothing. They had a nice house, a nice car out front.. it’s an affluent neighborhood… but there in that moment I could FEEL everything about their existence. I could grasp who those parents were to the core. The fear was nothing new to what I’ve sensed all my life.
That adorable child will eventually be conditioned to manipulate the people in his adult life, just as his lifeless parents do each moment in their delusions of self-significance and false superiority.
Giving without a calculated agenda in adulthood is perceived as weakness or foolishness. Exactly… EXACTLY like ‘finger me’ PRESUMED that my good intent here to all was a weakness.
Now look at what adult children do in the society of survival everywhere. Lies are told so frequently, so unconscionably, thinking THEIR LIFE is — true.
If I don’t make people — feel death — from my stillness, response and glare, no one will.
“If I don’t make people — feel death — from my stillness, response and glare, no one will.”
That folks, is Pluto in the 7th manifesting it’s untouchable best.
(Actually Pluto penetrating life through my existence now in the 10th house of ‘the public environment’.. it will magnetize here til 2024 and then increase its influence on a huge scale in the 11th house for another 20 years)
No arguments needed when I can trigger the existential fear people never seek to confront in themselves. The fear of their lies;)
yes that experience you had breaks my heart because I feel it all the time.. sometimes it feels like a compression, like I’m on a weird tv show..like its all closing in on me and the only thing that keeps me still breathing is death.. i know you understand what I mean..sometimes its so intense that I feel it by just looking someone in the eyes..and it scares them and they feel freaked out. its like a mix of death and love at the same time. So I have learnt to keep to myself..
People are afraid of the truth in themselves. I don’t know why really.Yes that pure giving you are talking about… people see it as naive, or unaware.Why must there always be agendas? Its like the quest for survival has become devoid of love ..As the years go by the layers accumulate..its bizarre really , a baby comes into this existence pure, wordless,innocent, aware, then slowly is taught concepts like fear and greed and watches it played out and layers and layers of muck are weighed upon its shoulders as it navigates its way through its life on earth and as it grows old the layers start to shed as it prepares for death. hmm sadly some are buried with all their muck fully intact .
Sometimes i feel if i am around children with their parents its like they feel like they have to control the situation in some way. I have been in situations like that before, they have to word what is happening even if it a wordless communication i am having with the child. And their words are wrong usually anyway.. it makes me feel like I am not welcome in some way..Parents throwing words left right and centre of what they want the child to feel.they do it with pets too. dispose of their fear onto their pet like its a garbage bin.and then they wonder why their dog bites the little kid down the road.. it drives me nuts.
” yes that experience you had breaks my heart because I feel it all the time.. sometimes it feels like a compression, like I’m on a weird tv show..”
Amen to that! Socially, I feel like I’m cast in Sesame Street. Laughing along with neighborhood small talk and everyday discussions in public is for me like laughing along with Burt & Ernie and a predictable hello from Big Bird and Snuffiluffigus.
I’m not kidding;)
Stay strong Umm, just know that every person who crosses your path in your life means something very deep. Know that you are blessed with gifts of seeing and feeling beyond the collective illusion through media and career status and ‘things’… and that you are not afraid to speak up exactly what you feel. Never believe the doubts and fears drilled in social interactions. Those illusions are not IN YOU, therefore they are not in your existence.
love Pluto
Ah no thanks, I have an unwritten rule to not write e-books for the pseudonym ‘finger me’…. and who don’t list an email when offering one.
It’s hard for me to fathom that your email is not a huge scam.
And I’m sure people have already copied parts of my work anyway and milking money from it through e-books.;) Such is this world.
Plus as Violet said… backlash and criticism from an audience when I write, is natural drama. I don’t need more of it now that you see what I have to deal with in human ignorance everyday;)
It’s spam e-mail, Puppy (and Gatubela). if you click on the link in the name it takes to some product page which is trying to peddle stuff. Akismet (automatic programme) in WordPress catches most of those mails so they don’t get published, but occasionally some get through, like here.
and,,, you felt strangely happy when reading my last comment.. felt it through my body, like ripples… happily satisfied is a better description..
Only one real point where True Enlightenment (our highest being) is attained… which reveals ALL… It’s the point of physical Death which feels just like entering Bliss of Knowing. The rest is a live rehearsal, in the bondage of physical body, hormones, synaptic connections, thoughts and demands of survival… Death, The Great Equalizer. Dust to dust..
Yet, miraculous.. every little star dust is capable of crying..
youtube.com/watch?v=Hl6zLvSWW3c
I see… The Moon entered Pisces a few hour ago.
Pisces rules feet and lymphatic system. Blood plasma… instant effects.
Over.
The flame made me cry. It’s a heavy price to pay, yes, when the Source is silent. There is only one constant.. that never forsakes in the midst of it all, and the petty comes and goes..
Starts in Hebrew, and goes into English.
youtube.com/watch?v=_lQ2H5tix0E
Silence…yin energies
Fire…yang
Yin and yang need eachother. Yin is earth, and transformation. Yang is fire and will.
I have to laugh..because on a subjective level, yin is so full of energy…and a little fire just sets it off. If men only knew.
“Do I light your flame?”….is the greatest compliment anyone could receive. Little..insignificant me…can light someone´s flame. I often have to pinch myself.
Blushing….
Its the creational big bang…if one applies the right will. Your physical life must be truthful and loving…below must be as above….
To create without illusion…and in truth. Not easy to see those etheral energies…to see how noisy the source is.
Everyone says…Why don´t you be quiet?
I say…”But I am not the one who is so noisy! I am quiet and then…”boom!” something comes to me…teaching…and beautiful soul…or sometimes am so happy to feel.”
So many things to see..feel..learn..love…”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pYkkgIdDKvQ
Being naked in front of eachother….its a precious energy builder.
Gatubela, Wisdom.. is all I want.
Blushing suits you, and I wish Grace to move through you.. and move you so, as it does…. that’s all we are.
Wisdom and integrity… you’ve been that flame here. People aren’t able to love the way you do, sadly.
Be happy, dear Cat, from my heart.
Hi Ines,
No…I ain´t a flame.
But I hold one in my heart.
Yes…Hebrew. Its a beautiful language.
Just like ancient chinese qi gong, or japanese kanji…there is alot of mysticism in this language. Am not so good with their alphabet.
Some people use these things incorrectly, without balance and it creates darkness that is difficult to shrug off. I guess they got off the path too early, and fell into negativity before reaching their Absolute.
Gatubela, I can’t even begin to tell you just what kind of connection I feel.. shooting through my body like lightening.. it goes far beyond Darkness and Light, beyond human relations and all that’s here on Earth. The Tree of Life… to think that every living organism on earth share one common universal ancestor, ONE.. just feel the sheer magnitude of it.. I feel like a walking miracle! every cell in my body feels the light, the SPIRIT… and all that comes from a limited number of chemicals in existence.. which were born out in exploding stars and colliding galaxies.. this here – IS NOT HOME. Some 3.5 billion years ago the Life was conceived here, there were souls born, every living creature has one, dwelling in its cells.. and who was I before becoming that which I am now? Where will I return once this particular path is truly finished? Home – is out there, here is to learn about this very specific FORM of existence, but it’s not THAT FORM. We are not that form, we take many forms, but are ultimately – ONE, eternal and omniscient.. but not as a human,,, I can’t even put this into words, it’s IMPOSSIBLE.
So here is the human petty, ALL OF IT, how utterly insignificant it is.. how MEANINGLESS. How energy wasteful and completely out of sync with what life IS… it makes me want to scream, but at the same time – LAUGH, laugh out loud… how unbelievable this truth is.. that there is no other way, but to feel it and believe it, because IT IS.. fuck, I have no words!!!!!
Swear for emphasis:)
I’m in love.
I,m just crying and laughing here.. the joy, the JOY of this intelligence, its all encompassing touch, look at these arms, look at the hair, at the bird in the windowsill, LOOK!! at that tree, they are your brothers, they are US, we are THEM, the KNOWING… it’s priceless, am I going to look into people’s faces? How? How will I look into their souls when they don’t know they have one, leave alone its origins? we all know so much intellectually, and know nothing in heart, and then it comes.. oh it comes and sweeps everything away, no it’s not bliss, it’s the IS, here, it’s the knowing… and oh boy no end is there, no end to this, and I lived FOREVER, i live forever, that which cannot be seen, yet is, always. and where is the human ego? in this form it is present, but that which I AM sees that which I AM NOT.,, SEES it, just like that, that of me, that of others, how can that be explained? It’s can’t.
I’m a Libra female (born 10/12) and I met a Scorpio male (born 11/11) on a dating website. We both expressed interest in one another, but at the time, I was in a long distance relationship with another man I met on the same website. I went to visit that man on a long weekend and we had sex for the first (it was not good) and he decided he didn’t want to see me anymore. I felt so rejected and alone that I went back to the website and contacted the Scorpio. We texted one another for hours. He gave me his phone number and friended me on Facebook over the course of our conversation. It was no nice to have someone so attentive after having my heart broken. Within a few days of texting and emailing, he told me I could be the one and said he was falling in love with me. I thought it was a bit too soon and told him how I was feeling so he pulled back a little. As the months passed by, we continued our online relationship. We both wanted to see each other and tried making plans, but it never worked out. However, our relationship grew in leaps and bounds and we both knew we wanted each other and decided to be exclusive with each other. It has been 8 months since we initially met and our relationship has been exclusively online via emails, texts, instant messaging, Skype, Facebook and sexting. We love each other and express that love as best we can. He calls me his wife and the intensity of his love for me is both overwhelming and exciting. I see a future with him and we talk in terms of us and we. This past month,, we finally made plans to see one another ( I was going to his city) but it ended up not working out. Since then, the frequency of our communicating with one another has dropped significantly. I text him daily (as was our habit) and I get short answers (love u, miss u, a kiss emoticon) if he answers at all. He tells me he’s busy with work and I accept that. However, I sometimes notice he is on Facebook or Skype at the same time I am and I’ll send him a message and he doesn’t reply (I know he has looked at or read the message). The last text I sent he took almost 2 weeks to reply and it was a short “love u.” I don’t know what to do. I love him so much and see a life with him but I feel like he’s phasing me out and I don’t know why. When I couldn’t come see him I had sent him a text explaining how disappointed I was as well as acknowledging his disappointment and he seemed fine. But now it’s as if I don’t exist anymore. I am very hurt at this silent treatment he’s giving me. What makes it worse is the way he ignores me and my post on Facebook, but yet he likes and comments on all these photos of different women he is either friends with or recently became friends with, using some of the same compliments he used to shower me with. I don’t believe it is over between us and I watch all the video messages he’s sent me trying to find clues as to what is wrong and nothing shows any indication of his recent behavior. I want to unfriend him and tell him goodbye, but I can’t because I am truly and deeply in love with him. But his behavior toward me is killing me and I can’t address it when he won’t talk to me. Any advice as to what to do?
Hey Veronique.. just my two cents.. from what you have written it seems like you have both over time have fallen into a kind of status quo.. I think it’s important to go back a little and remember what has led this into being.. remember how you first got together.. and you said the sex wasnt good and he didnt want to see you anymore.. ( he may have meant that at that time) ..but then you chose to persist and then he has gone along with it and you have been developing a friendship online etc..laden with lots of yummy words such as love u etc.. and then you almost meet and for whatever reason you cant make it. since then he’s gone cold. ok, well Scorpios have fine memories, they don’t miss a trick, they remember every single hurt ( for years sometimes). The fact that the sex was bad.. was akin to a hurt..and then topped up by the fact that you didnt go and see him when it was planned.. its kind of like “once bitten twice shy”. Sex is really important to scorpios , and bad sex is not something that they would go back for a second time..so really, please dont feel hurt by this.. because that is not going to help the situation,by feeling hurt you are letting yourself become stale and helpless to yourself hoping in vain that you will be rescued or something, which is kind of turning it into a disney film rather than a real life situation which you are a part of. All you have to do is just understand why things happen..and I know sometimes its not easy.. but then you as a human have the gift of being able to ask questions to find out..so ask him. or better yet.. go and see him.. just plonk yourself on his doorstep feeling and looking gorgeous and physically give him the love that you so verbally feel for him.you can do it!;)
A couple of astrologers put it like this:
LIBRA — is the plastic guy and girl standing hand-in-hand on top of the 12 tier wedding cake. I.e –> heart flutters and plastic smiles — meaning, superficial relational nonsense which does not penetrate the bottom OF WHY they love each other, OR WHO THEY ARE, but simply an intellectual need for brittle ego-attachments AND BELIEF OF those attachments external of them -> the external fuss of outward appearances. I.e -> all that is whimsy, all that looks splendid to the outside world perky and celebrating. The allure and indulgences of Venus and her traps of blissful meaninglessness. = the superficial.
SCORPIO — is the consummation. I.e — the complicated messiness of deep throws of extreme emotion, sexual compulsion, sexual jealousy, scarring resentment, expressive control x 8, manipulation, head games, silences, covert subtlety, profound influences exploding IN each other. = transformation… OR it = be careful what you wish for.
I’ve dated and known countless Libra women. I won’t exhaust my inner-wealth and self-knowing, my INDEPENDENCE of my relationship with my-vast and deep self…to be uncontrollably consumed by waves of dependency, tantrums and neediness in a woman. I honestly don’t have the energy to constantly feed a woman’s trifling insecurities, and OF NEEDING ME = 5 texts and 3 phone calls per day. I just don’t have it in me.
That’s what male ‘independence’ ought look like from your view liitle Libra. That neediness… dear Veronique… will send any guy with a solid sense of his destiny running for the hills. And I bet you are near 40 years old too. Age does not mean one actually mature in soul, in heart, in vision. Age and maturity are no even close to the same.
Not to offend Veronique… but when you say this… ” We love each other and express that love as best we can. He calls me his wife and the intensity of his love for me is both overwhelming and exciting. I see a future with him and we talk in terms of us and we..”
That’s all well and dandy for your ego approval… BUT… that feeling you’re getting is not grounded in true soulful empathy. In other words.. you don’t know him from a can of worms, or a chest of yellow diamonds. Your PROJECTIONS are creating wondrous fantasies in you of who you ‘think’ he is. ‘Words’ of luviduviness do not make ‘a relationship’ true and organic and ambivalent and volatile within. Truth arrives from depth and vastness.
When you are lost and crying from despair and emptiness and loneliness, you need only look within. Looking only to the external for mysterious males and beautiful butterflies is not going to fulfill you. What you need is far more significant than any male or imagined love affair in the sack.
Air signs signatures, meaning Rising Air, Moon Air, Venus Air, Mercury Air, Clusters of planets in houses 3, 7, 11 etc… are people who live utterly in their heads. They can’t listen to the gut, or trust their instincts. Not in the real world.;)
Peace and evolution;)
Hello again Veronique,
Libran people don´t understand their own energy. Its again, because no one waits until their own soul energies, in order to decide their own behaviour while in the abyss.
Actually, in terms of duality, libra is not a mental energy. It is actually a state of “no mind” out in the cosmos.
Ego has no choice, other than to mentalize something that is a kind of a law – beyond ourselves. This law makes its presence known in our life, strangely interfacing at certain moments. And you are getting a feel of it at the moment.
Unbalanced ego balances itself to the light, and prepares to meet its counterpart in death (scorpio). Best to prepare for death with the respect that it deserves.
Marshall artists meditated years to understand this concept of fluidity and instinct – no – mind, and manifest it in battle. Just controlling your breathing while walking on the street, can give people an idea of this energy. Just try to walk in slow motion…and see the effect it has on you and your perception of the “ants” scurrying beside you. We can place ourselves in a point the physical, in order to understand an interesting truth.
It is actually an incredible state of mind – with a kind of venus energy focussed on beauty, movement, soul, expression…and death. Which is why, a trained marshal artist, might not be fearing death in battle.
Scorpio, also to add to what P.Puppy said…is the transition from objectivity of those ants (acute perceptio of who they are) towards the path of a soulful presence of who you are in the midst of them. This is why scoprio is the walking abyss. If you do not have any idea of who you are “out there”…then this energy puts you into a state of confusion.
I feel that scopionic energies do love being truly needed. Deeply touched, soulfully nurtured and seen, under love. This is not dependance energy, nor temper tantrums etc.
That sense of love, must come from the depths of you and your desire to merge. This won´t be anything you can visualize in happy love energies, but through soulful – carnal…rawness of passion and desire.
Even though P.Puppy clearly indicated he prefers independant women does not want to be “bothered” by a woman´s insecurities. But we are talking to someone who feels insecure…and…well…geez….women are NOT men, and we all have to start somewhere.
She never had sex with him, it was another man…
Hi Veronica
I understand you two have never met physically, and all was conducted online only?
You said you arranged a meeting, but pulled out.. now imagine yourself in his shoes.. imagine a man makes a promise to come and see you and then pulls out and never suggested to meet again… it looks like what exactly? A lack of interest perhaps. That’s how he may view it. Have you brought up a question of meeting up with him again? Ask him, just ask and see what his reaction will be, and whether he will say ‘yes’.
A relationship has to move from an online phase into something more tangible, or else you will have become his online fantasy, an outlet for his emotions and no more.
Ask him. In the meantime… keep yourself busy with other things in your life, It’s hard sometimes, but he has a life outside of you.
I wouldn’t turn up on his door step, it will not go down well… Water signs don’t like unexpected folks turning up.. or being aggressively chased (and that’s what it will be) UNLESS we have given an explicit permission… complex I know…
Hello Veronique,
Trying to post something, that adds value to what has already been said – is not so easy.
So, I will go from another perspective here.
Try to do this….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FaEvBVAKswI
In order to understand what is missing when you try to understand this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5TeSPvfmdDU
Good Luck.
Hello Veronique,
***Sorry, previous post is awaiting moderation, so I reposted***
Trying to say something, that adds value to what has already been said – is not so easy.
So, I will go from another perspective here.
Try to do this….
youtube.com/watch?v=FaEvBVAKswI
In order to understand what is missing when you try to understand this:
youtube.com/watch?v=5TeSPvfmdDU
There are no answers to “you” and what a woman can offer a man while making love.
In The (Love) Making
Kissing the small of your back,
The fire burns in your limbs, let it rise,
A million miles per second, it bursts into your eyes.
Pelvis to pelvis sitting, all wrapped around, life in the making,
The hot of your skin, my stomach is breaking,
Let me enter onto you
But hold, oh hold it, the night is still young,
Melt us as One, one heartbeat, one breath, one lung.
Drive me into submission
Knelt on the altar of your desire,
Sweat, the holy water of unworldly fusion,
The pulsating rhythm takes you and I higher,
But not yet, oh not yet, my King,
Hold it, hold it unspent,
Like a willow to your will I bend.
Kiss the delicate milk of my thigh,
Let me dissolve into your body,
In your arms to slowly die.
But not yet, oh withhold it please,
The night lasts forever, my tease.
Let me run my teeth into your lips,
Bursting with blood, from hours kissing,
You lay onto me, oh hold it for longer,
While I feel every drop of your hunger..
Time collapses in your last quiet breath,
You die, and I live in your glorious death
As vermillion dawn pulls us asunder.
Hi Ines,
I thought your poem was very beautiful. And it took alot to write it and be so open. So, I am really thankful to be reading it. You must really love the person in your poem.
Am a bit shy about asking, (really blushing here)….but here goes…(I really feel that these things have to be part of everyone´s education, but no one says anything, truthfully and sincerely)
How can one submit to someones desire, when at the same time, you want to give back. After being badly treated by my ex husband, submission is not something that I actually feel I know how to do. I mean, if you are feeling someone´s desire, how can you give back that same feeling to your partner? (Because it feels very nice to be desired . it sparks a reaction in us). Don´t men want to feel the same? (Has any guy mentioned what they want to feel when with you?)
I liked how you wrote “The fire burns in your limbs”…
I am not talking about waving my ass, and the guy gets hard, while I wait to be taken. I would like to know if you feel that a man´s sexual energy is tangible…and raises through the last chakra.
I hope that I have not made you feel too uncomfortable. I just nearly cried at your poem. It was very honest and beautiful.
Blushing…but very happy to be able to talk about these things.
Nothing is uncomfortable, dear Gatubela…
Gosh, how does one answer that, it comes so naturally to me that I never analyzed it..
What does submission mean to you? You may have a different understanding based on your experiences with the Ex… For me it’s being utterly RECEPTIVE… open to every unfolding moment, to the atmosphere.. I look at the man, and there are absolutely no rules, no expectations of what is going to happen and how.. everything is a possibility.. You trust his desire for you, without questioning. It cannot be controlled, only flowed with… a man FEELS MY desire for him through my openness and receptivity. So, how…. I don’t have to ‘do’ anything to submit, his desire drives it, just listen carefully to our combined energy cloud (for better word) and go with it. A man who feels he can do no ‘wrong’ while making love to me – does no wrong. It makes him feel like God, and who could argue with that? In that way you give him – himself really, the ultimate feminine strength…
Pisces/Scorpio love making is meaningless without the corresponding array of feelings, all one thousand and one of them, an act of near religious worship, like a never ending psychic foreplay.. coming close and stepping away, and it takes a long time, because every moment is meant to be savored.
From my experience, not every Scorpio man has an ability to transmute great emotional energy into a seriously uplifting love making. The SENSITIVITY is often absent/suppressed, to me this is much more important than a sexual prowess in a man. I need his being to speak to me on very intangible levels. I am selective, when it comes to the choice of being with a man (even Scorpio), because I am sensitive to his ability to feel with me. Mind you Scorpio men mirror even in this area.. if a woman wants/behaves like a plain fuck – that’s what she will get. If she wants more – she will be taken to the world beyond. And that’s the magic – women actually are the ones who hold the key to this other world, not the men.
There was only one man in my life whose sexual energy I felt tangibly. We both physically VIBRATED through entire bodies, when simply in the vicinity of each other, it was difficult to ignore.
I guess trust is the key word… you trust yourself that you can handle both his and your state. I trust myself in that way, love making is as natural to me as breathing.. I’m just crap at money making:)
Gatubela, thank you for asking and for being so open as well.. Now, when I’ve said all that it feels rather cold and contrived.. I’m just better at expressing my femininity in those other ways.
My son loved the poem too.
Anything around sexual activities is so secretive, when it’s such a massive part of life.. asked yourself why?… People do countless things together with others, which don’t warrant the same level of protection.. so why? People are at their most VULNERABLE when making love… physically, exemplified by the energies they feel… psychologically.. exemplified by possibility of ‘death’… emotionally, exemplified by the intimate solitude between two people… mentally… exemplified by the flow of communication.. even culturally, exemplified by nakedness (well, we don’t generally walk around naked).. This utter vulnerability, exposion of yourself to another.. in the animal world it’s the moment easiest to ambush and capture/kill an animal. All senses are focused just on that..
And if even ONE ingredient is missing between a man and a woman, if this vulnerability… to be you, AS GOD INTENDED – is not allowed… the Bond will not happen, all that will be.. well, you all know… The Dribble.
To see each other in that true state of being, without external bells and whistles. That’s the TOTALITY of a relationship a Scorpio guy is looking for, give him ALL. That’s why sex – is THAT MUCH important, and if the guy is half aware, sexual indulgence is not the goal.
And he WILL walk away.
And women think it’s all about cleavage and a masterclass in a blowjob… sad. Passion of him is not about sex, it’s about Life.
There is NO SUCH THING as a Scorpio guy blowing hot and cold, no ‘chase’.. these are notions, invented for the unconscious Ego comfort, trying to ‘explain away’ the natural flow of the moment. False perceptions. So he goes off for a month.. LET HIM. He’s got things to do and stuff to think over. Don’t harass him with texts and calls. Why does it bother you now? you didn’t KNOW the guy before and lived happy without. what’s changed? If he took an interest in you to begin with – it’s there!! He is not ‘cold’!!! Just that he needs time to himself… and he will be back in full force. Always, if a woman is secure in herself and lives her own life. Stop obsessing about what he is up to. When this guy knows he is free to come and go – he will come back, and he will not want to go much again, and trust me – he will not take ‘no’ for an answer then, oh no.. You will be glad to have kept your sense of perspective.. he doesn’t forget about you, he never forgets ANYTHING that was/is real to him in any way, how could he?.. This is the heart and the mind that thrives on REAL. Those are not ‘tests’ deliberately designed to test your ‘patience’ (what patience??).. can you stop the river from flowing, or volcano from errupting? His feelings are THAT, no tests. And all that a woman feels towards a man – is already within her, she doesn’t need ‘an object of desire’ to bestow this upon. Love yourself truly, through that you also love him, on so many seen and unseen levels.. He is moody and solid in his stance.. sure he is, isn’t it what attracted you to him in the first place?? So how does that become a ‘problem’ all of a sudden?
As for Pisces/Scorpio… if all the above is there, the energies become so complimentary, it’s unreal. Just be your natural self (have you MET your natural Self yet?), and he will appreciate that no end… There comes a time when he trusts you, because he senses that with this relaxed attitude – you trust him to BE. And things become easy and free where both feel so at ease, none of it contrived, or difficult, just the joy of knowing each other. NO DRAMA. Both live in the moment, in the ‘now’, any stupid ‘expectations’ are absent by default, if you remember this true essence of you and him.
Just relax. Let it flow naturally. You will NOTICE how he becomes more and more beautifully tender and attentive, the REAL tenderness, not something designed to get you where he wants you, THE REAL THING, the difference is palpable! He will not take your bullshit, no. But his own, too, will go away. Just disappears.
This applies to ANY man, not just Scorpio. It’s just that a Scorpio guy is looking for REALNESS IN EVERYTHING. So just multiply it by ten, for him. And for Scorpio Mars – multiply that by 50. And you know what happens? The so called ‘submission’ – becomes a meaningless empty sound. In that state of being – there is nothing to ‘submit’ or ‘submit to’.. just BEING.
It really is hard to convey a sense of freedom born between two people in this.
Hi. I’m an Aquarius female and recently, a Scorpio guy just broke up with me. He told me that his friends said that he dragged the relationship out for too long. He broke up with me while he was crying and told me he still cared about me and wanted to be friends. He broke up with me at one of his best friend’s birthday party (but we were alone when he broke up with me) and later went to have fun with his friends. The next day I called him and he told me about how he thought about the situation on whether or not he was doing the right thing, but he was also sort of bragging about how he was drunk.
We’ve argued a lot in the past and had mini breaks here in there when arguments were overblown. Every time we fought, I’ve been able to keep him with me but this time he just broke it off without any warning. I texted him a few days later and he said we could be friends but he didn’t want me to talk to him for awhile. He also said he was keeping my stuff. I saw him yesterday and he ignored me but I caught him staring at me several times.
Do you think he’ll ever come back? This break up was very heartbreaking for me and as an Aquarius, I was able to get over it quickly but I still dwell on it every now and then. We have been dating for a 1 year a few weeks and he broke up with me last week.
Any thoughts??
Hi Aqua girl,
A week… you said you were able to ‘get over it’ yet you are here.. probably thralling the Internet for some ‘information’… obviously, not ‘over’.
What were you fighting about? Was it that important to you, now that you look back at it? Normally, a Scorpio guy is looking for a sanctuary in a relationship, not a battlefield of wills. He didn’t break up with you without ‘any warning’, the warnings were there, you simply failed to notice… Aquarians are not versed in the art of non verbal communication, based on feeling the situation on every level.
You wore him out.
Why do you want him back when it’s something that doesn’t nurture either of you? Ask yourself that. Ask yourself what being with a man actually MEAN for you… what does it mean?
Try to see WHAT you feel, and since you are the ‘thinking type’.. utilize that to understand your feelings, that ‘heartbreak’ you mention… A year is long enough to know the truth of what brought you together and.. why it’s not there anymore.
Then move on. The chances are, if he has a smidgen of self understanding – he will not be back. Sorry about that, girl.
I’m still learning from you, but I’m making my way to the top as well.
I definitely enjoy reading everything that is posted on your blog.
Keep the tips coming. I enjoyed it!
the corruption is closing in .too much! I’m out of here
I stopped TV, radio, news over two years ago.. this opened up after checking mails.. he caught my eye because he looks so much like the boy whose life I’m tracing in my dreams…
She was his MOTHER. How is that possible? How can this happen? It took him 33 hours to die after head injuries, after months of prolonged daily abuse… I’m just crying and I don’t know what this world is about, it’s Hell here, and as I’m writing this another child somewhere in the world is suffering from unbelievable cruelty..
I feel like taking a sledgehammer, I’m so angry.. where are the solutions to all this? where? all has a meaning, but this, does it have a meaning? What fucking meaning is that?
http://news.uk.msn.com/shock-over-incomprehensible-abuse
What do I feel?
What if feelings and words don’t go together?
Words are invisible droplets of sound
A torrent of noisy muteness hitting the ground.
Nothingness of declarations
Love and hate, empty exchanges leading nowhere…
Words, words, words… a biggest mistake
Of humanity; spitfire roasted emotions
Expressed as a sound wave in all its absurdity…
Do I not know another language of feeling?
My arms holding you in silence and meaning..
Do you feel my eyes
Speaking to you? A throbbing sound of soul,
So enchantingly naked this true conversation…
What words can replace a sense of elation
When you smile at me?
The language of this Universe in the wind..
In the gentle caress of your hand.. in a kiss of a child…
Words fail the feelings… words, the feeble construct of the Mind.
I dated a Libra man once.. a sense of rejection he felt after a third (!) date when I said it will not work was unbelievable.. things like ‘I see, men with
glasses don’t get the passes’.. he wore glasses, as if it matters. He killed me with countless texts and calls, and I didn’t want that.
Separation is not from the Self.. Self… The Self IS separation FROM ALL, in which we lose Sight. So tiny, so microscopic is this intelligence..
I miss you, Puppy, my 11:11 Twin. it’s not your freedom that resonated.. freedom is still a human concept.. it’s the Soul Consciousness, that ENERGY which spoke to me. And the longing is for all that you are, both human and soul, for we cannot escape this truth in this physical form. We are All. But a deep sense of (be)longing doesn’t mean grasping.. Love between a man and a woman is reborn every day, because no day is the same as before, and no human is in that same space again. Love is not fixed to one point, yes, it’s volatile, ambivalent, it shifts and shapes, but there is one constant in there…
626 days passed since I got to know you. Not a day without. Still.. I have to leave, it was not meant for this lifetime.
I wrote this nearly 1.5 years ago, after I dreamt you up.
A Comic Meeting
In the nether land of sleep and dream
Flung across dimensions by cosmic dance,
My ascended spirit has met its twin,
Someone to distantly love and romance.
Colours yellow, grey and piercing blue,
An unlived barren memory made to last.
A drawn serious face, do I know you?
Have we touched before through the karmic past?
Crow’s feet around his eyes speak separation.
In an instant this too will come to pass.
Distant centuries where we missed creation
Of eternity never destined for us.
Twenty years on someone walked in the street.
My heart recognised those eyes of the ghost.
The ears ringing this violent beat,
A lifetime of longing for that memory lost.
In the caramel sun of that afternoon
Trembling and pinned to the seat
I have let his face pass. Very soon
In another life we shall finally meet.
One last thing..
Astrology is a tool of the Air (Intellect), a useful map of symbols, but.. it’s not the TRUE ESSENCE of us. Look beyond that, we are so much bigger than signs.. we are not the limitation placed on our beings by a roadmap of psyche. Psyche is mortal. We are not.
Answer to Rumi, ‘Only Breath’
For some the permanence arises..
Allowance of seeking gone,
You’ve met Awareness horizon.
For others, moments in embrace.
Days, maybe hours of touching Holy Grace…
It stops. It always stops.
The Consciousness in chains of mortal body
Back in this vessel drops.
And I become again – somebody,
While knowing non entity in this…
I laugh at Transience of Mind bliss..
Well, back onto the human Hell,
The Citizen of not this world in stance,
But born to it. Until that day
The only breath – Acceptance.
youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=IZqAnIp5dMQ
Hi there! I simply would like to give a huge thumbs up for the nice data you
have here on this post. I will be coming again to your
weblog for extra soon.
You. It. All.
Brighter, fresher, taller
Becoming with each passing day.
Fear of loss has melted away,
Left me with this sudden lightness..
So unusual. But hear me out.
After having absorbed the pain
Of your dimly lit world, void of brightness.
The hot lava of your volcanicity
Burning for months, leaving me ill,
Night on night added, no balance
Of sun against shadow, crushing my will.
To learn of your ‘you’
Wrapped myself in your twilight
The colour of indigo blue..
Yes, having absorbed your reality
I understood
The relentless viscera of your Being
And mine. But hear me out.
Remember Inception?
Not really US, or YOU this deception!
A fantasy, countless centuries old,
Walking dead chasing it into the graves,
To phantom reality mindless slaves.
A dream within dream is this world..
Hear me out! It.
‘It’… steps not into Darkness or Light…
Nor echoes the ruinous speak of a body…
Or follows treacherous tales of the Mind’s spite…
Heads fight battles, and hearts seeking peace…
We find our ‘It’ in all this.
‘It’ is not ‘you’, but you are the wholesome ‘It’,
Untouchable, invincible, endless, invisible,
Conceived in the fold of Unknown, in its timeless beat.
Brighter, fresher, taller… yes, and I need
To admire and love both ‘you’ and your ‘It’.
Compassion.. the only point, my brother,
Transcending the Self and stand by each other.
Decomposing ‘you’ through the lows and highs,
The gloom of the gloom, locked in the dungeon,
And the soaring ‘It’, looking up to the skies..
Heart beating, blood boiling, mind racing. Alive!
Within Stillness of Love – all embracing.
You. All. WHOLE. ‘It’ within never dies.
“Thy will be done”
Hi Ines,
All souls should be loved.
“Thy will be done” is a powerful statement, if send out to the divine, or the divine in us.
True surrender…True Power.
Instinctual. Obvious.
Angels sing quite loud, do they not? Noisy things.
This study by these “researchers” is bemusing
http://news.yahoo.com/religious-people-are-less-intelligent-than-atheists–study-finds–113350723.html#upCr476
These pseudo-intellectual clowns ‘think’ that they are “non-believers”. HA!
They deem that if you are an atheist… then you don’t ‘believe in God’… well I have a little something something to mention.
Your ‘belief’ in Atheism ITSELF is a?? … Belief. So you do believe in something. What IS.. that something you believe in??
You believe that God is a noun. Therefore you actually ‘believe’ that your intellect is greater THAN THE ENERGY of this fleeting, infinite existence.
Who would win an IQ contest? …this guy plugging his book for his money and material belief… ORRR… the Sun in the sky who could fry him to a crisp if he did not drink water for 10 days?
“IQ”.. is another man-made definition, a man-made invention, which pigeonholes the mass herd thinking. I’ve known many intellectuals who are completely gutless people, clueless cretins. What does this mean? .It means that intellect is unaware of LOVE.
Of God permeating THEIR FEARS of insignificance!!. LoL. Hysterical.
Intellects, I quote from the study… “who know better” Hahaha.
Dim is dim regardless of intelligence. Unconscious of energy = Clueless of powerful transforming LOVE!
(btw my old email address is no longer in use)
All the good and bad, in a strange sense, won´t matter if it exists or not, because of the consequences they leave you to deal with while “living”. Being “alive” under this sun is a bloody curse while people engage you in a viscious cycle of their soulessness. It because “the whole” can not be perceived…just “the good” or “the bad”.
I do feel that at the source of this is manifested in our culturally accepted, just pleasure me seeking sexuality. The consequences are, that we don´t know how to “not do it this way”. Like ancient sacred knowledge, it is becoming lost, within our collective culture consciousness.
Sickness perverts the minds grasping at false sense of power. It deeply saddens me, that even sweet nice people, won´t place any warning signs, in witnessing people fucking another person up and destroying “life” based on not perceiving that they are insignificant – before “passing the judgement and doing the Verb”. They all of a sudden become almighty…
With no balance in ourselves, we have no True Verb between people. Everything beforehand is just bullshit. If people want to try and assume control of that, then that is even more bemusing.
The transforming power of love, comes through the concept of eternity, after balance. What is left standing after the shit hits the fan and destroys all illusion?
We don´t know this realm. LoL…it seems like nothing survives.
Its interesting though that Chinese medicine says that wisdom, is housed in the kidneys (the source of all our energies, and interestingly, our sexual energy too.)
And even more interesting is the fact that after scorpio is Sagitarrius.
To change the topic…
I have to say that in my life, I have found that Leo women make the best mothers and are the best carers/lovers of children in general. Leo gals really know THE SPIRIT of children, as it is reflected in their own hearts. Here below is Julianne Hough (an actress)… a beautiful Leo gal I find very spiritually adorable as a person, not a celebrity. She is the classic goodness of what it means for Leo to love children, family, creativity and fun. Watch her movies and see her purity and strong independence. This is because Leo is one evolutionary slot after Cancer i.e.. ‘mothering gifts’ ‘nurture’ and putting down roots for a stable loving home and family.
http://omg.yahoo.com/photos/stars-share-their-personal-vacay-pics-slideshow/julianne-hough-jpg-photo-1376501840786.html
Leo gals are infinitely more honest about their lives than the scores of male Leos I have known.
Lion males in my social experience pathologically lie and make up feeble excuses for their self-consumed material/control motives. They are good at deceiving others by re-directing an argument which DEFLECTS the Truth of any matter away from them. They like playing political games to get ahead materially at work, such as my step-brother and many others I’ve known through friendship. I’ve noticed that if male lions are not getting their ego’s constantly stroked in the material game of acquisition by a fake coddling audience (external-approval)… they are blinded by their own creative desire.. Which means as the 5th sign on the evolutionary wheel, Leo males are socially unsophisticated with who the the broader HUMAN world is and relating to other creative individuals. Their concern is always dramatized with egotistical presumption rather than true empathy, incessant self-creation rather than a complex and subtle integration into the larger, scarier socio-emotional whole.
As such, there is an aversion to actual humanity in male Leos, a clueless shrug of other peoples core principles and values, so they have no REAL or sincere care about another persons life. I’m not kidding.
Leo male associations (not true friends in my world) true-to-form had that Napoleonic complex in their attitude… that need ‘to Rule’ others in their solar orbit in a tyrannical, INHUMAN way. And by no coincidence, dozens of these male Leo have been short physically, just like Napoleon himself. Fidel Castro is another one exemplifying the tyrannical social positioning male Leos play in the business world.
Leo women in my life have not been inhuman like the males, but rather self-protective (another deep characteristic of Cancer her sister) because both male and female Leos fear losing their independence, therefore losing their subjective need to ‘rule’.
Next time at work or play, just find out who are the male Leos? Ask yourself if you feel that they truly respect others opinions and choices? Ask yourself if he is really AWARE of you as an individual in your own right? The answers is… he has no idea.
The answers in my mystical experience, is they have no intention of earning ‘respect’, because they have no social handle what respect IS. There is no social consciousness (opposite Aquarius) of WHAT respect IS. only the the needs to “perform” in the illusory world of ego creation.
Oh…we changed the subject to Leos? And I am talking to a scorpio stellium? What is there that I can say, that you can not see already?
I looked at those pictures. I can see a woman who is sincere in her spirit of fun and love with her son and meets that energy head on. Lets her hair down and understands their world – and wants to be there for her child.
In my experience with Leo women in the “survival mode” is I have seen that they are fun and shiney, (used to distract and manipulate their darker inadequacies and ruins they leave on others – the truth of leo energy and the darkness of it) and do not like to get their hands dirty to do the real work. Not team players and very manipulative. Stroke me first and I will be nice. No real independent decision based on Ethics…through heaven and hell…standing eternal through time. Actually, Me first, second and third while convincing others (while desperately trying to convince themselves) about some imaginary “great spirit” that will solve everything on its own. A grasping… fake faith…leads to a false living. As long as it is going alright for them and they feel they are in their position of dominance and that they can, effectively, rule over you, only then does the “generosity” and bla bla bla come through – you know…all of those shiney postive traits that we are known for. They use this as the basis of their treatment of others.
In relationships, they are not “really for their husbands” – projecting an image of what their kingdom should be like instead of what it really is (nothing)…They won´t have the capacity to meet raw sexuality, which is also deeply needed in male sexuality since getting naked means loosing purity.
Leonine purity means separation of her and (raw) humanity, but they seem to connect well with God. Maybe that explains the lack of empathy. Maybe its because they can´t see rawness. LoL..maybe they don´t recognize a power greater than their own.
Empathy requires a deep willingness to bond with the good and bad in a person and unconditionality. The good, separates in our society, and the bad, will send you to hell and condemn your soul. It does not matter that you are “pure” and are manifesting “bad” on others. This kind of empathy is beyond, not only leos, but most of society. Independence comes in here, as leo would have to handle her own problems, and face the manifested destruction of her god damn sorry truth of her soul. Independence does not exist – at least not the way leo energy places it. Birth is assisted. Death is assisted. You need another person to make love to. Can not see God, unless you love tantrically. You can´t get face karma, without “God”. Or seeing it in another. And be bloody grateful that you can. This kind of gratitude is also, unknown to Leo as they won´t ACT on it. Feelings mean nothing…words mean nothing, if you can not put a VERB to it and Be it.
These images lead to illusion crashing down on them due to the fact that they don´t understand that creation does not mean “control” over someone, or have domain over their life. The aftermath of this is that people get tired of them – they become boring people, dead inside and not even sexually giving. You will see them, praying, believing in God – and trying to get converts to their beliefs too. In the end, they become shells of the shine they once were – weak despots of an idealism that did not understand what power really means. And that power, sometimes, must be rejected, in order to “do the right thing”, correctly.
Leos, in this sense, won´t feel their own devastation that they have created, and for the most part, they won´t be interested in it. They are so right, all the time. Tell them that they made a person believe the lies they spun and watch their reaction.
That is the kind of inhumanity I see from them – and the potential I see in myself.
You seem to have met the nice ones.
The higher good of the Group is can be perceived in Aquarius domain in what could be considered in a selfless manner. Negatively, it is a person who does not move from their ideals and lacks mental flow. I don´t feel that Aquarius rebellion is tuned into Respect as Leo would define it. Aquarius won´t set the standard, with the current benchmark out there. It will be something BEYOND the group. It’s the group you are rebelling against in the first place.
Respect can be defined is the potential of influence I have in order to move “the group I belong to”. You can also define that as power – but for me, power is something else completely. It is what I have to give – the “something” in me that is an agent for transformation. The unknown in me, is what power is to me. It won´t be “the nothing in me” or the ego illusions I have about myself. In Aquarius, this becomes, “the unknown in us” ….(*sniffle – I still get emotional). Group work at its divine best.
For Aquarius, it´s not about control, but what happens when we release it. So…it is the mind that has to be illuminated first and not the heart.
Adding something new to the pot is the goal. This movement is very butterfly effect – chaotic and absolutely unpredictable because the abyss of the group (instability ) may stabilize at any point of manifestation between what has caused the conflict and the new element. What is absolutely predictable is the soulessness that will pop up, while you hold your ground. This for me, can be called “the truth” of the people I thought I knew.
But anything is better than what we have “now” in the group dynamic. The group is very limited for Aquarius. Non expanding. They are not interested in status quo and are not looking at the group for any answers. It will be the transition from a subjective “me” to the objective “us”.
For many a battle, it was important to have “God on our side” in order to win. But these truthes, are so misunderstood.
It is true that those who form delusions are the ones who enjoy claiming ownership of such delusions, in order to feed their egos and suppress their true creativity and desires.
knowledge.. funny how it is often associated with something mental.. something that can be proved or gained.. when actually nothing could be further from the truth.the isms and schisms. and it all starts at such a young age, with the parents and the tv and the schools and the news and the words and the flung out from the peace and quiet of your own space where time wasnt questioned or denied or challenged. I find intelligence attractive but it is not the intelligence that is void of knowing the silent space, the unknown, a moment that can be unstated whilst splitting and exploding and sensing between. I find nothing more boring than someone who has to blab on to me in their laborious monotone about their achievements and their labels for this and that for everything that exists in this world..yes like they are terrified of being squashed. Yet they are squashing themselves with their own podgy hands,, ahh its so uncomfortable! like they are castrating themselves.
im starting to wonder ..
“…submission is not something that I actually feel I know how to do. I mean, if you are feeling someone´s desire, how can you give back that same feeling to your partner?…”
The answer to ‘how’ a woman naturally submits her feisty masculine (minded) grip on a moment, especially a hot and steamy sensual moment with a force of nature she cannot control (the sexual/mind presence of a strong guy)… is mentioned right there in the poem Gatubela.
“Drive me into submission”.
* Submission 101 for bunnies.
Here… feel your control unraveling… know it in your bellies, and smile for the blessing we have given you.
Not all as it seems. There is always ONE woman lurking in the shadows..
youtube.com/watch?v=S1A0p0F_iH8
I actually read the play… and it made me feel horrible. Stanley is a straight forward, no nonsense guy who knows his mind, absolutely.. strong, yes, but also brutal in his strength.. and then.. he has a heart too, how is that possible, how can these things be combined in such a complicated way? Why can a strong man not be kind in his strength, without the brutality of reinforcing his manhood, firm but without abusive inclinations? I can see why Stella loves him, but theirs is a co-dependent relationship based on raw sexuality.. the force of nature to be reckoned with.. I’m sure in time her love for him would slowly change him, taking the edge off his need to stand his ground without compromises and feel he always has to be the driving force behind everything, his word – the last one.. trusting in the love of his woman, in her wisdom.
There is much I got out of this, thanks for posting this, Puppy, truly.
What does every women want….. to experience??
Tension;
It so rare for women to feel sexual tension, that when they do feel it… it shocks them into a ball of gooey putty. She is so accustomed to having sexual control with males way backs since she was a petal. She then scurries off like a stunned bunny, dazed and speechless, and away she goes to her ‘husband’ or boyfriend at home and keeps under lock….or she yaps about that moment til her jaw cramps-up with her girlfriends.
It’s like the second coming Christ.
That’s how rare.;)
c’mon, really??
Hi P.Puppy,
I don´t even know what sexual control was…what is it? A woman who manipulates with sex? Her energy controls the relationship without the intention of loving him because of this inner knowledge that she can abuse a man´s sense of identity and independence?
So, if she is not manipulating and trying to obtain the eggs you are sitting on, what the heck is she doing? How is she loving you?
I do know when a man abuses the sexual energy of a woman, her sacred processes and she is powerless to do anything about it. As it was done to me, I really don´t feel comfortable making men feel sexual desire for me, because I know that sexual tension per se, is not a man loving you. Nor is it me loving him. Actually, it the love that is blatantly missing in every state of being with the other person. The women you describe in your posts seems so cold, so uncaring like you don´t know how it is to have your soul touched by another. You mentioned in one of your first posts to me, that you knew love…and death…. I understand that you don´t have to show these powerful feelings here, but I would bet that the woman who you felt love with, probably was someone special. Why would you continue using the words “yap” and “feel it in your bellies” when you have such a beautiful woman in your heart?
For me, I imagine that it would feel like so beautiful, so vulnerable… to have your “manhood or womanhood” to share with someone, that “petal” would be about all the force I would want to use….and even your tough nuts are sensitive.
Scorpios are in the unique position to have their own sexual energy transform through their intentions. And I would imagine, that you as venus in scorpio can transform through your love too. So, on that note, I see sexual energy all the time, since as a child- it is grasping and tenuous, or dark and controlling, or weak and submissive to a great fuck if tits and ass are included in the blowjob. It can be demonic and wanting to cause harm too. I steer clear of it, like a flashing warning sign – unless someone touches my heart. The truth is, I strive to see the light in the Gods in my life. If they have it, then I imagine what I am doing to their souls? My own energies will decide then.
For the sake of your perspective, all women are bunnies to you it seems. Maybe one day, you will find that special woman who moves you.
Hi Ines,
Thank you for your answer.
Hi Gatubela,
When I read this yesterday, one thing came to me… The women who stayed on here (you, Umm, me) are NO BUNNIES anymore….
I said in my post 2009 ‘Sex on that level exists, yes.. except the feelings that arise in that state, a sense of connectedness to the reality of imagination – are TRANSIENT. They are – freedom from the mundane copulation, that’s all. NOT LOVE. ‘
Puppy doesn’t say it’s love. And you don’t say it’s love. From a water sign perspective… you are loved at the moment of love making (by a Scorpio guy).. and this love is not soul love, but it is sincere for what it is – desire to share the feelings together IN THAT MOMENT IN TIME. It could lead to more.. or end there. Scorpio men are not really blowing hot and cold… they feel what they feel, there is no agenda.
With tension comes the challenge of seeing who I am when with a man who, potentially, has the power to make or break me. I guess it’s just the way I’m wired.
I posted that other clip for a reason.. there is always one woman who is the ruin of a man.. the heart shuts down. The key to removing an invisible shield, shrouding the heart of a Scorpio man is the love of a woman who will challenge him on his bullshit, but love him through that bullshit unconditionally. PERSONAL love, not a universal acknowledgement of existence of compassion and empathy. It is a very powerful thing, turning one’s reality upside down. imagine looking into the eyes of a woman and knowing she will stand by you no matter what… that’s how she is loving him. Personal, it’s the ONLY THING, I don;’t care what anybody (or Puppy) says. in a way, there has been a lot of unconscious denial taking place (That should answer the question I was asked once of what has been unconscious). He had his soul touched.. it’s just that the heart of a man doesn’t open again easily when the scar is there…
I hope, yes, it will come to him.
ugh..
Gatubela, can I ask you something, and I hope it’s not too intrusive…
How would you let a man love you, without feeling that he wants to express his love physically? Would you prefer the platonic kind of love only? I mean… for a man (especially Scorpio) if they love you on a soul level, there is still a need to express it through physical love making…
You see.. I don’t feel that same way about sexual energies… anything can be used as a tool for control and manipulation.. even something as beautiful as those… but I understand that your experience was unbelievably harsh.
Hello Ines,
Look at your video video. I am not talking about the whole movie – but the scene that you put the link too. It is not a “male” love scene, but a female one. Marlon Brando was a sex symbol and portraying the collective female dream with him at that time. And the actress probably a sex symbol too. I have studied how we use symbols to represent a culture, that is “marketable”. There is nothing “REAL” in this scene.
The man looks all tough, cute and vulnerable (symbols of shirt ripped up, facial expression etc), with tousles hair (after sex hair). The woman “surveys him” and slowly sashays down the stairs. Nothing here is coincidence because in movies, everything is symbolic in order to provoke collective response, movement and unleash appetites deeply embedded within our psyche. So, as it is, this was the current sexual ideal, at that time. This is what made people buy the movie.
She, is in a superior position while he looks up to her. That is the key for her to move, oozing control and hidden sexual power. The moment BEFORE when they touch, what does the guy do? He kneels down (symbolic for worship) and only then does she leash out her sexual energy. Then he unleashes his desire, and carries her to the back part of the set – not the forefront. In movie making that is very symbolic. It says that his penetration of her, is hidden in the dark, away from our curious eyes, and we are left with a sense of “wanting….”
Strictly, in terms of analyzing the frame changes, there is no wisdom in her love, as the scene clearly portrays her, to be in a position of power, only responding to his “submission” as a sexual stimulant. It represents the ancient female power of “what´s between her legs” and his appetite for that. So, since this is marketting, ($$$$$)probably, what happened as result of various scenes like this, is that men did not get any in America, until women felt they could “look down at them”. Do you think I am joking when I say this?
Now, let´s look at a male love scene. Men prefer women feeling their sexual power too, commonly symbolized by material things and large penises. Women go orgasmic over his “extensions” and members through friction. Playboy – a general and culturally accepted standard – is interesting as it is designed for male entertainment. Women are blitheringly stupid there – i.e. made that way because they need something inside them. Women are facinated by large penises. The sexual positions are standard, very little kissing and touching (lets just get to the penetration and me being penetrated) and oral sex is highlighted. Women are shown to enjoy prancing around naked with eachother (partying), and having lesbian relationships. These are very powerful symbols too. Men, based on their “penis” can have any woman getting wet for him and desire his penetration even if he just got off the first “mount of the day”. (remember – big dick – big sexuality). Its acceptable that females “fuck” eachother too from this male perspective. Actually, the more, the better.
Frame changes, are based on closeups of her “submission” to him, and his power over her. Penetration is not hidden. Actually, it is emphasized. Her orgasm, is not really the point of the movie. Neither is his.
Put Curvaliscious Woman in Marlon Brando´s movie, with Big Dong Bob in the typical playboy one, and what happens? Are you feeling “the love”?
I prefer platonic.
Hi Gatubela,
My brain hurts.. another shift, my analytical powers are gone carboom, just poems pouring out. I can’t really find words to define anything, just doesn’t seem important anymore.. I will go with the feel of it for now..
The movie speaks to the male/female archetypes that exist on that primeval level in us, you’ve certainly nailed that in your analysis. I never watched it, in the play Stella doesn’t leave. The wisdom was her acceptance of him AS HE IS, but this acceptance weaves the spiderweb around males.. While on the surface it looks like he is the dominant force in the relationship.. I felt she was the one in control psychologically, and I didn’t feel she traded anything of herself into the bargain, as she seemed secure in herself. A mutually fed sexual infatuation provides a surface balance of power there, but really, overt male aggression (him domineering the relationship) versus covert female control (the true power behind the scenes).. at least, that’s how it came across from the play to me. Ultimately, it is about feeding off each other, not about a genuine wish for another’s welfare.
Yes, sexual energies can be used for incredible abuse. Like you, I’ve seen that from my childhood. I was first propositioned for sex when I was seven or eight, and this constant stream of men trying to extract carried on throughout my life. It’s like I never existed… men always spoke to my chest, looking below, never look the woman in the eyes, checking out other ‘vitals’.. this objectification of a female form.. and those who did look above, said it was my ‘tongue’ that got them… and I just wish they took the trouble of seeing into my soul instead. And so one comes to a point of realisation… all the love that exists within can be turned onto itself, nurturing the one who will stay with me for the rest of my life.. while all those others come and go.
But I love love making (with the right man)… I love the feelings that surge through both.. sensuality of exploring each other’s bodies.. the eyes… emotional intimacy it brings.. sanctuary it grants the soul… issues of power don’t come into this, and now more than ever I am conscious of what I bring into the picture when with a man. So it would be very difficult for me to ignore the sexual expression of love (despite my choice of ‘two men in eight years’), but I understand that you feel differently about this, for your own reasons.
Scorpio men at least make an effort to look into a woman’s eyes.
Hi Ines,
I understand the raising of the chakra through the head – if that means anything. Its kind of like grabbing the energy, working with it through raising it and absolute selfless giving back. In that sense, the gift that is felt in our bellies (hmmm) that P.Puppy mentions, is given back.
Women give gifts too. (*shy kitty cat)
Gatubela,
The gift that’s felt in our bellies = ‘my stomach is breaking’. It echoed. Same in essence.
So… Puppy’s Scorpio Mercury goes a bit unrestrained for sure, but really.. I will listen to him yapping, or talking, or rambling, or communicating:P
The Gift of a Woman… Mercy. In those hot steamy moments, and in all other moments.
Deliverance
Infatuation?… or Love. Obsession?… or Love.
Lusty sex in the groan of a bedstead,
Masking the sound of forgiveness…
Wild emotions, tucked away, hidden,
Nothing will ever be said.
Only the heart stood a silent witness
To the dark trail of shadows, forbidden
From resurrection. But have we forgotten
To shuffle the karmic cards of our will?
The fierce clasp on the heart’s seal,
Bitterly sworn in the moonlight stain..
In Mercy they prayed for the souls of those
Who died and are mourned to be born again,
Locked in the interstate of a ghost…
Undisturbed by watching the reel of past deeds,
Their tears gracing the memory’s grave,
Yellow stems gently breathing Deliverance:
“Forgive me, forget me. You are free. You are safe”.
The cliche of “Art imitates life” is an eternal truth in day-to-day social dynamics, Gatubela. Your synopsis of the film does not mean a castrated ‘loving’ male will move you beyond your comfort zone… meaning your ego projection of your reality. The ego creation in a persons perception of the world around them has an incredible fear of that perceived reality to shatter. No visceral transformation within can happen if ego dominates/fears sensitivity penetrating it.
Both of you are Submission Impossible… and I’ll tell you why.
I’ve known this occult truth in both of your existences for years.
Your reactions to the human world think and analyse all the time: i.e. the masculine ‘assertion’ of your egos dominate your illogical feelings. Therefore you both attempt to find your true feelings through logical deduction. That logical rationalization is not in touch with the Divine Feminine available to you.
So you both are not experiencing the present, or experiencing Eternity with the God-Source. Meaning you both have created a separate entity of ‘logical answers’ — via your very limited PERCEPTIONS within you…which are not sensitively attuned to the surrender — The surrender and detachment and ultimate death of your ego illusion (in the human world).
I’m absolutely no match in comparison to what both of you ”think you see’ in the illusory world around you. Because that attachment to the surface chaos in people is not an intense and occult penetration of what happening beneath the collective ego.
My Moon in Capricorn, (11th house) sextile Venus and Sun (9th house) is just a fractional reason why I FEEL the world at large IN THE PRESENT.
Because if I did, I would not be in the present. I would be attached to the noise and clutter of my ego, which has not dissolved or died.
I never analyse the present gift. (except for right now… because I see/understand that you guys only see what the normal person would actually see).
Surrendering means to let go of surface attachment in mind. So I can’t force a transformation in a woman or any person (her assumption of life) if she does not know (feel) a power beyond her conformed opinions and ego conditioning and comfort for arguments sake and for the sake of fake attention.
If you study people in depth in your life, Gatubela, as I naturally do without effort… you will be startled by what fakeness THE ACTING people do (are) in the provebial ‘real’ world.
My perceptive universe of the world, this human world in front of our five senses is infinitely different than what you both ‘think you see’.
The real world, meaning the material/surface PERCEPTIONS which people project external of themselves every moment… is paradoxically… all an illusion. An illusion which ego could never comprehend.
So full circle back to my first comment. Actors who entertain us – ARE A REFLECTION of the real world and projecting their social/material facade at us… to the world.
That facade… is a natural defense mechanism to ‘shield’ ones self from the deceit, immoral intent and corruption of all other creatures doing what they do amid this imperfect human jungle.
In order to understand society, we must understand ourselves in depth and vastness of our purpose in the superficial material world first.
Again, death (of the ego) is not just a descriptive word on paper.
If we live a life of death, we are reborn to see and feel the eternal present. Because the eternal present is a virtue, a power of knowing suffering.
The eternal present (of true perception) is not found in political man-made opinion or intellectualism.
Once again, mans world (ego validity) could not possibly understand Gods universe… UNLESS… such a man has the sight and intensity to see/feel the integration of both within his heart.
Pisces rising… on the occult level… can ‘be’ and ‘see’ the God… in the man-created mythical world.
Truth is forever shifting and fluid. Truth is not just a law created by man in the world of material application. The Truth among us is never rigidly fixated on any limited opinions/perceptions ‘which man believes’ as real, or true.
Seeing the eternity… the Truths in the present, are elusive. Rightly elusive because…the eternal nature of our hidden existence is only experienced for the initiated.;)
In summary, I’m a student of life by virtue of on-going intense experiences. To perceive the true nature of life is to know that we as human egos know nothing at all.
That is the Divine.
My experiences are what you are all reading. You are not reading a man who has lived a redundant, fearful, comfortable or predictable material life.;)
I am fully alive (awake) as I experience my unknown path.
Imagine… comprehend… the immense courage it requires to not live a comfortable, predictable known life? 😉
Look around you. Listen carefully to people. Watch them. People live in the known. That comfort is their known.
Get it??
Hmmm. something doesn’t feel right about this.. I just can’t envision Christ ‘analysing’ Paul and Peter.
Puppy, you said this yourself “I never analyse the present gift. (except for right now…” – right now, here, on the screen. As we do.
Also.. “death (of the ego) is not just a descriptive word on paper.” Absolutely, without a doubt. so… I could write a piece on Gatubela’s and myself, the essence of it, but it would be – false. Why do that? instead of – truly communicating?
What I am trying to say is… the REALITY of all of us, in acutely felt experiences with the outside world – is failed to be represented through the insignificance of words, yours included. The ONLY way to KNOW is to STAND NEXT to the person. Their body language.. facial expressions.. the way they speak… the voice.. what they DO… are the ONLY true indicators of their reality, and their essence.
“Therefore you both attempt to find your true feelings through logical deduction.”
FEEL with me. Then CONVEY your feelings to me. Can you do that? When a Scorpio guy puts his arm around me, pulls me close, and we just sit there in silence… this is where the gift happens. Not on the computer screen. I hope you understand the difference.
I’m not sure you’ve crossed that transcendence line, but if people ‘think’ you are crazy – it’s a good indicator that you have:)
Until I’ve met you in your physical life… And it will take me thirty seconds to know. Half a minute, that’s all it takes for me.
…. you say ‘for the initiated’… and it tells me that you – haven’t. A couple of people I know who, like Tolle, went through the Transformation – would not even UNDERSTAND what you mean by ‘initiated’.. such an Ego induced expression…
You don’t ‘love’ people with the smile when things are shite… actually, a lie. You love them – with the being and the deed. You LIFT them out of their morose reality.
But. You are hitting where (for me) it hurts the most… I KNOW in my heart that I haven’t crossed the line from being supremely Aware to being Awake.. there is a difference you know…
Spiritual Ego is a tricky thing, Puppy.. just observe its workings, in yourself and others who claim to ‘have attained’ freedom.
As for Gatubela… I’m sure she will reply to you in her own way… but you said this to the woman who was on the run from Canada to Chile, with THREE KIDS… comfortable existence, hey…
I am done.
I don´t feel much of what you just posted, because for me, I have experienced what you are writing about, and attempted to do something about it. Nearly got killed. I am aware of the lie, and how people will kill for it. Its hard to feel that movie when I can perceive the damage it does to that life you want to see in people.
It resonated that you try to see the light in people – it seemed very leo and it filled me with joy. It was my biggest mistake seeing the light in people – which is an unknown for many – and reacting to that truth I know and the contrast of the sad reality I am facing.
Do you know, that women in general, do not consciously work on their own morality? Its all emotional. The mind accomodates. Very dead.
Eternity is painful P.Puppy – death hurts and I cry all the time. What hurts even more, is manifesting it. The gift between a man and a woman, is always an intangible. His energy to her womb. Her nature is to make it into a tangible – through birth.
She will have to grow that seed, or abort a life. How does she nurture it? With love or negativity? Does any man made rule come into effect, when she is pregnant? Everything in her will protect the child.
And that means lying like hell. Its the sad reality of women. I got knives thrown at me, was left to go hungry, tricycles thrown at me too, threatened to get killed – while pregnant. So..yes..lying like hell was the option to protect children. Working too, for money. Learning that I had to have people like me or else no salary. Oh…and when a woman is alone, all men just want to do is abuse. They even think she is so horny that she needs a good fuck and is desperate.
I analyzed the movie, in order to show how even on a basic level, our emotions get carried away with one message, because she is clearly a woman who feels desire, and reacting to his as well – but the subliminal messages are clearly another. The collective consciousness is being violated.
Every time she advances, he lowers himself physically. Even when she is facing him face to face, he still lowers himself. While that might be his soulful reaction, that is not what audiences are taking home with them. That acting is strategic and deadly, while bastardizing truthes of what happens between a man and a woman. The emotional messages and what is being ingrained into our subconscious is contrasting desire and rawness vs strategic femine energies.
The truth is that masculine are the owners of this energy, not feminine. As someone who is in tune with that collective subconsciousness, I am sure you can feel the karma.
Sexual energy can be raised – through lower centers, arising to the mind, and then to the divine. Meaning, the desire between two people, can always be aligned to God. These are sacred truthes of sexual energy transformation. Their intent with such chaotic forces of their own nature….to love each other.
How watching television, makes us dumber, and we don´t even attempt to analyze that even on a mental level. Its the mind, that first must “see” the game in order to begin awareness.
Aquarius Girl:
I only know Aquarius energy in battle and not really as who I am. I know that it is incredibly objective and impersonal, as it shows mentally, what has to be done, but not necessarily is the will power that enforces it. That requires, as per your out in the universe way of thinking, something absolutely God – like.
Meaning, aquarian objectiveness is perceived cold on earth, but the truth is that it is truly active while feeling the divine.
Howcome, who you are is missing in your post? Maybe you can share with us, what you are currently reading?
Hey Gatubela I know what you’re saying, but here’s the distinction.
Acting is performing, out there in social dynamics. Acting is not Being.
Being has no hidden agenda to ‘play games’ because that intent is??.. Acting out ones myth (in life).
Being is soul-conscience, soul-centered regardless of external chaos or excitement. Being understands its own behavior in the world, it’s own motives every moment. However people who Act (out) an egoistic myth live their lives in social illusion. The existential level between Acting and Being is profound.
Acting seeks external power, so it has no true self-knowledge, because that ‘reality’ is external of the person in how their ‘audience’ perceives them. Actors always change (psychologically) according to the feedback friends, family, partners or associates are returning them.
Being… does not want to elicit a manipulative response. That solicitation originates from the selfish need of Acting.
People who manipulate others for the intent to gain something ‘perform’ for others, they are on deep levels (unknown to them) deceiving others of their true motives. Those motives are always selfish motives.That is what the material world does all around us to survive.
So acting is far more pervasive throughout society than truly Being.
You had also mentioned that you sense Leo like traits in me? Yes of course. My Sun is actually trine my Ascendant. So that means I am Leo Rising in much of my self-expression.The playful part of me is that Sun quality communicating to the world in aspect with my rising sign.
But not to confuse, I believe I’m Being the synthesis of all 12 signs through each moment of my existence. Wholeness is infinite. It’s nothing comparable to ego separation.
As a reminder of this conviction Gatubela, please refer to my advise given way back at post 1098.
Being (the existence of Being).. feels and can see the truest nature of ALL reality.
Acting is so easily swept away by vicarious associations, feeding it’s starving ego (external) by what it thinks it sees external of it, i.e parental conditioning, career conditioning, 24/7 media fame and celebrity phantasmagoria, social/income status of cars, clothes, castles and kittens.
This Gatubela, is what the masses see as the real world.
Now what does an Eagle see/feel in that illusory capsule of vicariousness?
This is where it all ties into my writing here on this blog…
Eagle constantly sees (and has to handle) –> Actors, pimps, thieves and imposters !!
Is it any wonder intense Scorpionic energy does not trust easily?
Remember, it’s a jungle. Eagle knows it… because Eagle soars above it.
P.Puppy….
I know you guys fly above it. Loosing everything you own, and suffering the whole time. Scorpio is kind of like leo, trying to help and correct the wrongs. Only that leo can´t perceive where the real battle is. Scorpio goes beyond …or …above, as you say.
When you have lost everything, then there is nothing to fear.
I have shared in this forum, in order for people to see, that a woman, who has been raped, abused and everything taken away from her, is in no way, facing a weakening situation if she persists in virtue and fighting. She looses fear. Its quite the opposite of what “victimization” preaches us. Loosing fear, is divine – as you have said. I don´t know what crap I must of have done my previous life. LoL…
If I were my true self, then all those politicians would have to face the exact punishment they dished out. And in the exact way. Thoughtless punishment, without concern…easily decided while they conversed during coffee. Here, all real agreements, take place informally, during “cafe con piernas”, which is coffee with legs. Half naked women serve coffee to “gentlemen”, in various locations here in Santiago. Just look at Obama during the latest meeting, trying to get support for attacking Syria. Slithering serpent.
So, I have been banned from entering companies because I would not accept the lies, (not joking – security guards will escort me out, at first sight) have had managers fired, school directors fired, threatened to be killed and even I have seen the violence that occurs, when people feel just a bit nervous. I have worked to help the community, giving free english classes, helping children who could not afford them here, and have been called a whore, traitor etc – by the people who are pocketting the money I created in order to help growth, and people in need. Politicians, who work with narcos in order to get the dirty work done. If I push it more, it means I will get killed. Its in every layer of society, between institutions, family…children…
P.Puppy, I have seen it all, because I have been in it all. Ministers, Managers, Military, criminals….judges, the poor, the rich and bla bla bla…
So, it is a matter of detecting the subconscious flow. For the rest of us, who don´t have your gifts, they can begin analyzing “What gets them emotionally motivated” or stimulated. The emotions are one thing, the message or SYMBOLS are really another. Meaning, what sells is the lie – just like that movie. Does anyone really like being the fool?
I personally like the idea of Qi Kung, Tai Chi, as art – and living it. Qi kung is not acting, but cultivating energy. Tai Chi, is also, an art, but with various defense techniques ingrained in it, as to memorize them. Brazilian kicking techniques, used by slaves to fool their masters, as a dance, but it was self defence. Yoga…which is an art too, but also has deeper ancient messages. Tibetian singing bowls – which is the music that reaches the soul.
I have to be very honest in saying, that I did not know how submission is a viable option in the bullshit we are living in without me having to battle, everyday. I give it my all, and depend on my own energies because I am truly not expecting a man to do it for me. Its not trying to be a man, but because scorpio has taught me that I have to be able to go on with or without them. Its their act of love, P.Puppy. I just listen to that, sincerely.
Ego submission is not natural for me with any woman who attempts to compete with me in masculine assertion or aggression. She will always lose. Why? Because my girlfriend or wife is not the enemy on the football field or on a political platform.
My woman, in my world is supposed be a supporter, a nurturer… WITH a an identity and life of her own.
I see and feel women (all people) as archetypes. Women as a deep archetypal symbol were designed by the Maker, to be in my heart not to fight against me, but to fight WITH me. A feminine energy that behaves like an aggressive pitbull (masculine) in relation to my inner life… will always be destroyed. Meaning, I will cut her with words, then walk away.
Because as I’ve been sharing for years, women are the Love Embodiment !! Her Mental conflicts with me to control (compared to support) is an oxymoron with me because I know women are not men!! We are made differently in a physiological sense.
With the all the ambivalent masculine seed flowing/desirous through my body, mind and soul. I’ve only learned to surrender my knack for the dramatic in a social dynamic by surrendering (seeing) that aimless/futile desire to the Force. I surrender to myself in essence… not to her fears.
There is nothing wrong with expressing an ego which naturally has a flair for the dramatic. What is truly unloving is the subconscious blindness of a rigid ego creation that is pathetically ‘blind’ of its true nature with cause and affect… karma etc. The verb of ego blindness in peoples expressed ‘belief’ is just as profound (in my universe) as one who surrenders his will to the Force, yet who still ‘knows’ he can choose to inspire if he wanted to.
It comes back to that virtue again — discernment (of what I know).
My ascendant combination of Neptune — Sun, are profound symbols of surrendering the willful expression, because self knowledge has evolved far deeper and beyond the external fiction of ego (as reality). Evolved through pain, loss, failure.
Consider these two symbols fluxing on the ascendant, and in a literal sense;
The Sun (heart identity)– the blazing life giver…
SUBMERGED in…
Neptune — Deep, Vast and Hostile Oceans (the dreamworld, illusions, and mass consciousness).
That combination is pretty darn astonishing when one slowly peels away the infinite mysteries of who one truly is. i.e – Me.
Then add Jupiter and Mercury in aspect to the 12th and 8th houses and you get cosmic ocean infinity, more of the “submerged” mystery of who I am.
What a divine journey this truly is;)
“..Just look at Obama during the latest meeting, trying to get support for attacking Syria. Slithering serpent…”
Well Gatubela,
Obama is only ‘a figurehead’ in the greater scheme of it all. He does not have absolute power. Bureaucrats make these decisions to start another war in another third world country….. Why?
Profit.
Wars create new jobs for American contractors/companies. Which means high margin profits as there is very little competition.
Corporate America is the real evil seed ‘behind’ what the public is seeing –> i.e politics itself (media control) shows the human world what they want the masses to see and believe. The media relays illusions created by political bureaucracy behind the scenes Gatubela. We the people witness illusions where true intent is not revealed. The truth is covered. Veiled. Thus the illusions of the material world.
The individual (Obama) is a solid man of integrity and character in my perception. I have no problem with him. He has more spiritual resonance than most public figures I’ve ever seen.
The figurehead (Obama- Image to the world) is truly powerless to overrule the multi-billion dollar corporate giants creating these laws and making these wars.
Truths known through the occult realm always stem from an origin (seed) and never from a bloom of sensationalised propaganda.;)
Hi P.Puppy,
Obama reminds me of a situation….
I know an ex-torturer. He was in the military, and it was an order he could not refuse. He tortured people during the dictatorship. After his service, he was discharged with no benifits And his house was bombed as a result, as people began to recognize him. Now, he works in a market, with no retirement pension and has to work at his 78 years of age.
I know an ex-general, who also followed orders, and earned himself a managerial position in upper management. He reaped the benefits of a comfortable life. But he is dead now, and as well as one of his sons.
Being part of the game, means selling your soul. Or you die. Even if Obama were spiritual, that is not the “company profile” for the job. And with such high stakes for the controllers, they won´t think twice in offing him by a tragic accident. If you can see it, and I can see it, are you trying to say that he can´t?
“Being part of the game, means selling your soul. Or you die.”
Selling your soul… because there are some jobs you simply can’t get out of once you ‘joined the company’.. and there is no alternative. Be the Puppet as much as your soul may be aching. I’m sure his – does. Too late.
Maybe he was naive enough not to envision that.. when he joined.
Hi. I’m an Aquarius female and recently, a Scorpio guy just broke up with me. He told me that his friends said that he dragged the relationship out for too long. He broke up with me while he was crying and told me he still cared about me and wanted to be friends. He broke up with me at one of his best friend’s birthday party (but we were alone when he broke up with me) and later went to have fun with his friends. The next day I called him and he told me about how he thought about the situation on whether or not he was doing the right thing, but he was also sort of bragging about how he was drunk.
We’ve argued a lot in the past and had mini breaks here in there when arguments were overblown. Every time we fought, I’ve been able to keep him with me but this time he just broke it off without any warning. I texted him a few days later and he said we could be friends but he didn’t want me to talk to him for awhile. He also said he was keeping my stuff. I saw him yesterday and he ignored me but I caught him staring at me several times.
Do you think he’ll ever come back? This break up was very heartbreaking for me and as an Aquarius, I was able to get over it quickly but I still dwell on it every now and then. We have been dating for a 1 year a few weeks and he broke up with me last week.
Any thoughts??
An illustration of one moment through the lens of Pluto Puppy’s reality:
It’s federal election time in Australia. People must vote for a new Prime Minister. It’s mandatory here. If you don’t vote, you get a fine in the mail of a few hundred dollars. How convenient… and how fitting for political corruption = systems revenue.
I cringe over the fact that I am forced to vote and be at the mercy of receiving stacks of political pamphlets and promotional bullshit in the mail from people who don’t give a rats ass about “the community” OR ME… as a soul. No?…Not true ?… well on the occult level, I know each of these ‘important’ puppets literally play on the minds of the masses. Their image is everything to them. Absolutely.
Politicians, the concealed corporations who make our laws — control the media. The media who disseminates the lies to feed the greed and self-interest via social power. So the political sphere creates a monster of lies that signifies a public image within the consciousness of the masses which are believed as something noble or important to ‘vote’ on. It’s such a pretentious, pea-brained collective sham in my existence. I had voted for the only reason to not get fined.
So I walk inside an old Anglican church to do this deed. As I walk inside, there was a wide open floor space where congregational seats had once been for religion. That contrast of vicariousness itself made me gleeful in heart. Immediately upon entry I felt a stale energy, a vortex of emptiness consisting of eight volunteers, male and female, young and old, looking all stoic ‘and knowledgable’ at their tables as they were directing me how to vote. Placing a vote here is like sitting in mud for a physics exam. The human atmosphere in that place was eerie to my intensity of sight and feeling of human nature.
So I sat down in front of one of the young female officials… her face was as long as a horse, her inner-child and exuberance non-existent. I sensed that she., like the other people were dreading their day. Not one discussion came out between them. Having a stimulating or interesting conversation with these people was not possible. I had questioned them about a few technical details and penetrated their realities. Such rigidness was breathtaking. I could feel the insipidness all across the room as I X-Ray penetrated each and every soul in that building.
It was like a morgue in there. That’s not meant to be funny. It was THE TRUTH… the fluidity of the UNSEEN TRUTH within those peoples minds, perceptions and feelings.
Lifeless, boring and afraid.
That was my ‘experience’.
I didn’t have to “think about” the known… the attachments to seen details on the surface. Life on the surface is about as interesting as watching grass grow.
What I absorbed in that ten minute experience… those eight people would never understand. Because I UNDERSTAND that their perception of reality is between their ears.
Their reality is a collective suffering in the darkness of the material known.
Even as I ‘loved them’ with my smile and high spirit… their response to the world (me) was satisfied to be in zombieland.
Slaying dragons in my life is akin to the spiritual warrior slaying zombies who are so rigid in mind, heart and feeling, it is accepted “as normal” in our society.
I am looked at like I’m the crazy one. Well, they are right. Thank Hades for that:)
Sounds pretty much like my experience today.. and what a miserable outcome with that idiot getting in.
I can relate to this experience, the stuffy atmosphere throughout church halls all over Britain… I stopped voting a few years back (it’s not compulsory here).
Don’t vote. And don’t pay the fine.
I’ve been saddled with the debt, from the fact that the salary I was on – was less than the social security benefits.. how is one supposed to live on that? So……….. I am refusing to pay it back. Full stop. If the system paid their employees a decent enough wage.. the insult of pennies for the job that was exhausting.. a labour of love. My bank is exasperated. Too bad, and I don’t feel one bit ‘guilty’ about this.
The highest salary on the football transfer paid out recently was £300000…….. per week. Fuck that.
If you are still perplexed by Scorpio guys…
You’ll get used to inconsistency.. of day to day feelings, behaviours, moods, intentions. Which means that one day he may treat you like The Queen, and another – you will barely register on his radar. It’s nothing personal, he focuses on one thing at a time.
You’ll stop questioning those either inside your own private mind chamber or (God forbid) with him. Which will save you a lot of anguish in the long run. Treat those like natural disasters – can’t prevent them, can you?
You’ll learn to read his body language and his facial expressions, because those will tell you more about his current state than his words. Become a psychic, it’s not that hard.
You’ll get used to the fact that his interests take priority. If he suddenly decides to go and see a friend at 10 in the evening – put on your lovely lingerie – and go to bed in peace. He’ll be back some time.
You’ll absolutely have to have your own interests, and he may even have a peek at those – and appreciate them.
You’ll get used to cancellations of meetings one week, and the urgent need to see you – a week after, on top of him being very relaxed about the timing. He will be late, so if he says 5pm – tell him you are adding at least another half an hour to that.
You’ll get used to the fact that the quality of love making will greatly depend on his general levels of fatigue – but he will want to do it no matter how knackered he is.
You’ll learn to become the main conversation maker, as he is a man of few words. Aside of those occasions when you triggered some memory in him, and he suddenly comes alive and feels compelled to share it with you. Treat those moments with respect.
You’ll get used to the fact that he always burns the candle at both ends, and you are – that bit in the middle, the cool and tranquil resting place.
You’ll learn that he doesn’t take ‘no’ for an answer and will pursue whatever he is after – with tenacity. That includes you.
You’ll learn to tell him exactly what you want, without waiting for him to guess, he doesn’t understand ‘hints’. He will consider your request, it will not mean it may ever happen. But he will consider it.
You’ll learn to tell him exactly what you don’t want. You might get it anyway. LOL
You’ll learn that there is a part of him which will never belong to anyone else, but himself. Let it remain that way.
You’ll learn there is a part of you which is yours only. He will be captivated by this.
And a million other things.. somewhere down the line you will become nonchalant and accepted of his idiosyncrasies. And he will start trusting you to remain THAT. Within this framework both of you are pretty much free to do as you please. Why? Because the bullshit of a ‘relationship’, as it is out there – is gone. If you are your own woman – he will see that and accept you too, THE REAL YOU. And things become easy from there on.
And if you are a Pisces… know that most those – are your own traits which now you can see in their full glory. Smile. At last there is someone you don’t have to ‘figure out’.
…..having BEEN all that, you’ll come to realise a few basic things…
That the truth of any relationship is negotiated in every moment, breath by breath. Don’t look at what was yesterday.. and don’t fear tomorrow. You are HERE, now (that ‘no analysing the gift’ Puppy was talking about). None of those (mental) projections apply, it’s a lie.
That you don’t NEED ‘a man’ in your life on any level, never really needed ‘him’ for anything. You are and be and perfectly capable of being responsible for your own sense of well-being.
That your primary relationship is always going to be – to yourself. Same for him. And your association with one another should enrich THAT in each other.
That compassionate love has always been present in you, and it doesn’t need an ‘outlet’ to flow out naturally. You’ll feel this truth very acutely.
That ‘romantic’ love is an illusion peddled by the material world out there, and you wholeheartedly bought into this.. until now.
That uncomfortable moments in a relationship are full of beauty and substance, and you will learn to negotiate them calmly.
That (I repeat) submission is non existent when the two people are truly being themselves. The Ego is absent in this, there is nothing to submit. There are no ‘material’ considerations, in the form of hurt feelings, wanting anything from each other and curtaining each other’s choices. It becomes simple.
That in this state the word ‘patience’ becomes meaningless. Completely.
Those are the gifts. Open eyes. A clear Mind. An open heart. A Scorpio guy will never ask you to part with what you truly love and what you truly are. Only with that which impedes your connection to yourself, the lies.
For me.. this shift occurred after just two months of seeing a Scorpio. He is not consciously aware of all that, but I saw it from my now elevated perspective. As I mentioned before… Pisceans learn by experience, it’s that quick, and we don’t need many lessons. And as Gatubela said.. “Its the mind, that first must “see” the game in order to begin awareness. “.. it resonated with me. See->feel->see again->feel again, an endless circle that leads to those light bulb moments.. we have to start somewhere.
EXPERIENCING LIFE. So… don’t read about it on the Internet, don’t pour over astrology books, don’t talk to a friend who was seeing one… go and BE in it. Observe yourself, listen to the inside clues, FEEL every moment as it occurs.. It’s worth the effort, really. The shadows will open up into one clear space.
Now, that you’ve seen things and are resting (being) within this clear vision.. you are open to all sorts of unscrupulous goings on, including those from your guy, as not every Scorpio is aware and may fall victim to own little sickness and mind perversions.. What then?…
For most people, a state of Transcendence (a physiological change which remaps your emotional brain centre irreversibly) doesn’t destroy the human ego. Ego. Unless you are Eckhart Tolle, and I am sure there are others, but I haven’t seen them in action, and it’s impossible to discern from their writings only, for me – I need to see non verbal clues, to truly feel the person and SEE them.. so.. the Ego is alive, but in a ‘suspended’ mode, like a separate entity which you are able to observe and notice its workings, in yourself and others (difference between BEING and ACTING). Most people on the Path – switch between the two, we are spiritual beings having a human experience, with all its trappings of material attachments, it’s inevitable.
So… Soul Consciousness has infinite Intelligence. You KNOW the answers. Ask yourself if this relationship is allowing both of you to grow on ALL levels: physical, mental, emotional, psychological, sexual… if all those are nurturing to both of you. If one element is missing – I walk away.
I had a man in my past who said ‘Let’s get married’, and although I was passionately in love with him for years (Scorpio Moon, huh), I said ‘No’, because this came from his fear , not from genuine love for me… I have a man who says he loves me, and I say ‘No’, because I see no evolution in us ever connecting beyond the friendship level. And I have a man whom I will leave, because psychological and sexual compatibility is simply not enough.
Where is Love in this? Well.. being with someone and giving them your all in that. SEEING clearly when one or both of you can’t grow, because of the difference in your awareness levels. And making a clear choice, from THAT SOUL CENTRE, not from your egoic little ‘me’ which didn’t GET WHAT YOU WANT… Love is not about a signed paper contract, and no guarantees are given when we decide to share our life with someone for some time… or sometimes for all time, for eternity.
“If one element is missing I walk away.”
But there will always be elements missing…
Ines, zero ego for me, is a decision in your life to renounce from that day onward, that your life is not “yours to own” (instead of your own)
In that sense, you loose the mental part, but you don´t become brain dead. The mind, serves and is aligned with the eternal in you. That would be more heart centered, but it is a union of all energies.
Jesus got angry…Gandhi got angry…They all had a purpose, it was just not their own.
But, just the same, at any time, any person who is enlightened, can fall. It won´t matter how many books you read. If you don´t understand “choosing”, through good and bad…heaven and hell, then you will misunderstand.
Its hard to explain..
Its not to have sex or not to have sex, or if he makes you grow or not, because in balance, you have the capacity to withstand both states of celibacy and sexual activity, stagnation and growth. Heaven and Hell…Pain and Joy.
The emotion that balances is the result of living the two extremes. Its a Third.
So..if you can handle sexual activity and celibacy, while NOT walking away, what emotion is actually in you? It is the STRONGER state of BEING. The BEYOND.
Libra…gotta love that energy in all the signs.
Hi Gatubela,
I didn’t make such a decision.. a sticky goo inside. Kind of tells me where I’ve lied to my soul, case by case, day by day..
pulling away from the devil can be such a fight.. it gets easier once a few battles were fought, but still.. I only learn from experience, not books. Those – are the pointers.
You said you cry all the time.. it resonated. Even when there are no tears coming… It’s not done with me, this journey, just keeps rolling, every day. There are days when I just feel no hope.
The shifts come in waves.. there is no choice, they don’t ask to be invited.. Sometimes I feel I used to be a man in the past, in (mortal) power and abused that badly.. so I’m learning now how to have none. How to have and know absolutely nothing, but my own being.
Keeping this in perspective (balance) is not easy.
As you said,, hard to explain.
and I hate being at the mercy of the planets… I realised that I feel the movements very acutely.. any hard aspects end up as a knot inside.. not kidding you… like today.. I get up and instantly know things are off.
“If one element is missing I walk away.”
But there will always be elements missing…
It’s not quite like that, Gatubela..
Imagine… ‘I’m seeing you now and you better damn make sure this continues well into the year, and beyond’ (all unconscious, of course), the foundation on which all modern relationships are based and the associated heartbreak when another makes a choice, immortalized in songs and poems for posterity… he/she LEFT ME… Grasping, wanting a signed contract, all ‘me’ ‘me’, I NEED THE SECURITY of your feelings – NEVER CHANGING. Ha! Like saying that to the sunrise..
Then Matriarchal relationships,,, short life, not much time, both need to survive.. I LOVE YOU NOW. Here, right now. I want you to live, because the warmth of your skin next to me right now makes me feel protected, and tomorrow you or I may be dead..
Sounds scary, doesn’t it, in the world where a ‘contract’ for everything (comfort of the familiar) rules: jobs, rent leases, relationships, schooling, families… And I, too, felt at first it was a ‘carte blanche’ for a man to experience an intimacy (emotional or sexual) with a woman and walk away.. a permission for a one night stand of sorts.. But guess what.. something special is there.. like you feel the man/woman and KNOW there is something that may (may) compel you to stay and find out more… it’s born not out of the NEED, but out of CURIOSITY to know who they are, beyond that moment of intimacy.. and you don’t know if this curiosity will be there a year later.. you just take it one moment at a time, no ‘thinking’ where you will both be later on.
Liz Greene was very right when she wrote this about Pisceans…
“Some part of Pisces will always belong to the cosmos, to his own inner self, and not to you. Unlike the simpler signs such as Aries or Taurus, Pisces is simply not capable of saying, ‘Here I am, a simple soul at heart. I’m yours.’ He may give you forty-five of the sixty-eight selves he’s discovered that week. Don’t expect all of them. There will be dreams, visions, that he can never communicate. If you keep asking a Pisces what he’s thinking about every time he gets that vague, dreamy look in his eye, you’ll drive him and yourself crazy, and never get any satisfactory answers. The real truth is that he probably doesn’t know; he just went off, and if left alone, will undoubtedly come back again. Many of Pisces’ ways of communicating are nonverbal; it’s not a sign that excels in debate and defense. Many Pisceans are completely inept at explaining themselves or their feelings. They rely on touch, atmosphere, a subtle communion that is almost telepathic. Try to force them into rigid explanations and definitions and it’s like holding a handful of water; it slides through your fingers and it’s gone.
Evasiveness is a word often used to describe Pisces. Deceptiveness is as well. But it isn’t the calculated statesmanship of the Capricorn, or the deliberate secretiveness of the Scorpio, or the mental gymnastics of the Gemini. When you see thirty different things, how can you explain one? Especially when the chances are that the other person can’t even comprehend what it’s like to see thirty? And ambivalent emotion – well, that’s equally difficult. How to explain when you love and hate someone, when they’re ugly and beautiful, when everything shifts and changes, and takes new shape faster than you can say chameleon? For all these reasons and more, Pisces is an elusive partner. You take the feelings as they come, and let them go as they go. Attempting to define and freeze them into structures is a futile exercise. Many people are badly hurt by Pisces, not because the sign is cold and unfeeling, but because the other person expects a conventional linear expression of love, like ‘I love you, I always will, and that’s it’, when a phrase like that is downright ridiculous to the Piscean who knows that love is a very varied state, that it has many meanings all of which change all the time, that everything is relative, that you can’t plan the future, etc. etc.”
Yet, she also said that love (for a Piscean) consists of the strings of moments, and if you put them together – you may discover it’s been a life time. A lifetime of Love.
This love – is free. And Gatubela… I WILL walk away. I don’t have to ‘have a stance’ on anything anymore, other than – I WILL NOT HURT ANOTHER BEING.
I AM THAT. The true me.
Hi Ines,
Coming to who you are, always means releasing the most deepest pains. Its so strange that even though the dead speak to me, I can never do anything to help the pain that I feel they took with them.
Imagine if you loved someone so much, and was loved by that person sincerely (not perfectly) that when that person died, you wanted to die, just to be with them, because you KNOW that person is THERE.
But…you are not meant to die. You are meant to be alone.
I know that the dead are around their bodies for at least three days. They watch people grieve and cry for them…become desperate to communicate so that their loved ones know that they are alright. Or they tell me how they were tortured…and thought of the woman they loved…
I am always surprised that it is the men who are emotionally damaged by the fickle love of the woman. They tell me that they were heart broken, because their love was sincere, and she left for a richer man…or a man better in bed. Their pain, at death, becomes my own, and I feel it so strongly, that I often have to be escorted away from funerals, tears streaming down my face.
In one case, a man even went into debt in order to fix the house, so that his wife would come back. LoL…she never did. Because it won´t matter what she told him and made him believe, the real reason she left, was something extremely superficial. His soul knows it in death, but did not know it in life.
I know that you feel Piscean love is elusive, but that would be you. Pisces, knowing death, is different because love does not elude death…it passes through it with the soul. There is nothing elusive when death is involved. There are truthes. And there is a source of the 30 manifestations. And you have have soul, which contains the 100 you´s. Death would have brought you to your Source – or eternal self.
My dad is a pisces and there is nothing elusive about him. He cries when baby animals have no mama. We had to look after a whole bunch of orphaned bunnies, birds and ducks. My mother, is the only woman for him and he can´t even make love to another. I can see that now, at my age. Its not a contract for him. He loves her. His spirit joined to hers in some way, and it will feel like half of him is missing when she goes.
We all have contracts – or karma. I am not an expert in loving soulfully. Nor soulful sex. But Pisces is merging love. Feeling the other person´s chakra. Feeling the energy rise. Feeling their heart. I would want to share all of who I am with a person, and not just a bit. Because under God, there are no secrets. I don´t see the devil as something I have to battle, as much as it has to be understood. Its the “WHOLE” and there are really no secrets or evils. Is the world falling apart because evil exists or is it falling apart because we manifest it?
Yin energy is darkness – and it is very knowledgeable. Yang activates yin and can not exist without it. Yin needs yang to exist. Its not a contract, but a fact of the universe. Creation won´t be possible without these kinds of unions. So feeling the persons heart, while making love, is what does it for me.
Hi Gatubela,
You want to feel a person’s heart, a Piscean expression of a Leo core Sun identity..
A Piscean energy expression (in all of us) is merging.. why and what with, why do relationships with other human beings dominate our lives so much? we don’t really learn who we are – on our own, or from books, and if you put a human infant in the jungle with wolves – he will become a wolf.. We learn from connections to others – about OURSELVES.. Piscean energies merge not WITH, but THROUGH another being – with the Divine in who they are, and it will manifest depending on the Sun identity. For a Piscean Sun – it’s through feeling the psychic Consciousness.. for Leo – the heart energies.
and when making love and giving your all – you are the bridge for one another to touch yourselves. You take each other to who you are, in that moment in time and in every other act while sharing their life. When I said before you make a man feel like the King, that’s it basically..
…it’s impossible to ‘share all’ from that, Gatubela, not a mental ‘decision’ or a secret, just the fact for me, and I can’t even coherently explain why. Maybe because the Soul of another is sacred and will never be KNOWN by others in ALL ITS COMPLETENESS, no matter how much we love them. There is a saying in Russian which roughly translates as ‘The soul of another is the Twilight (the Unknown)’. Can we, while merging with OURSELVES – also -> give up ourselves into the Cosmos.. into another person, into the state of Oneness which tells us there is no separation between ‘us’ – AND ANOTHER LIFE FORM.. no separation between ‘us’ – and OUR HIGHER CONSCIOUSNESS STATE… People haven’t got a clue what they really are looking for in relationships.
..the bond will be forged, through love of oneself and another, and it ain’t gonna happen instantly.. Would your dad have been able to say to your mum “I will love you forever” from the start? I can’t. We take our time, anything else would be extremely superficial. Piscean love is not elusive, just Pisceans.. I never in my physical life said this to a single man, quite the opposite, like with my ex – I said ‘If I stop loving you, you will be the first to know’.
Piscean Suns are suckers for others.. they would give anything to experience Divine Love (into the Source), and by doing so they cheat themselves out of it, because they give up so much of themselves in the process… So yes, I couldn’t look at another man.. while he could be with other women. I guess his Taurean Sun wanted to merge with bodies.
The world is falling apart because we manifest evil, not because it ‘exists’.. ‘lack’ in us comes from mentality of Rational Perfection.. and projecting that out into the world. Love your ‘devils’.. mine are probably very different to yours.
The truth is we are not designed to be solitary creatures in this human experience, but we learn that we will ultimately leave on our own, as we arrived. My son is gone to Ireland, and in five days time, when he returns – he will leave again forever. The life of 18 years as we’ve known it – no more. We both feel it. When people die, especially suddenly, in conflict, I always think of the woman behind each of those, the Mother who spent years of giving selflessly (not for all of course), every tear, every sleepless night, every smile…. without expecting anything back… all into oblivion in a matter of seconds, like it never mattered… It hurts a lot.
The Dead want us to let them go, in Joy and Gratitude. Not to mourn.
I’m trying to say in words what simply runs through me, and Hell, that’s impossible.. like the foot in my mouth.
In the end of the day we all talk about the same things… yin needs yang to exist.. the supporting energy.. or coming into oneself through another. It’s humbling just how much the same we all are, despite all the outward manifestations.. we all search the same.
Gatubela, if you want to talk privately I would be most honoured, and if not – it’s OK too.
“we learn that we will ultimately leave on our own, as we arrived.” so the moment of preparation… Loss and separation and pain and utter despair, when there is nothing left to give up anymore.. Death revives Life. Until we died – we will never truly live, because we don’t really UNDERSTAND and SEE what life is.
You know… I feel… so calm suddenly, even though an hour ago I was going through (invisible) motions over my son… SO CALM…
Taurean self wanted to merge with bodies…
I liked that statement. For many years, I did not even know what that was…
Soulful love is divine. The mind with God, knows peace and has been to other astral worlds, and is not worried about whether BF – or partner is doing someone else.
The universe can not intervene, if our love is so selfish.
“and is not worried about whether BF – or partner is doing someone else. The universe can not intervene, if our love is so selfish.”
That’s how it was.. His endeavors were not a secret between us, all in the open. Women – I knew, and they sometimes said ‘How can you know and be indifferent about it?’ I didn’t own him. And what of the bodies.. he could as long as I knew his soul was with me. No one tells people whom and how they should love. That was mine.
Scorp Mars said to me ‘You won’t share, I don’t think’… At some point you hope for reciprocity.. that a man will willfully choose to share his body and soul with you only. When my ex did – it was too late.
It wasn’t the women that broke us.
We are good friends now, always will be.
I didn’t have to read books to know love.
Hi Ines,
Imagine that you are taking an objective stance. You see your partner being tender, caring, soft and attentive to another woman . which would be his man made law “wife”. She is frail and needs his protection. Then, there is you, the other woman. He is rude, mean and harsh with you, because you represent the person he can be his true self with. Its typically scorpionic, that for some reason people are “negative” with them and the underworlds start manifesting, just by you being there. Like you bring it out for some reason. But, it is just the truth of who they really are.
These for me represent, our two pathes. One is “desire” and the other is “not what I want, but what is right”. Which one is the truth?
Because what we feel is right, is something that is created for us. Will we be willing to kill for the lie, or for the truth? In my case, husband was willing to kill me for the lie. He did not care about who I really am. My feminine essence was valueless to him, and that included the children.
I feel that a man has to be with that woman who is his desire and what she is, right for him. I mean…what she IS, and not what she isn´t. I know, that for me, this won´t be forth coming, because who I have become, is not exactly loving feminine energy in sex. You have that wonderful opportunity to maintain yourself and your beauty.
For you, sex has been more pleasurable and soulful than my experiences. You see it as a soulful experience and need no instruction in how to love.
My experiences with sex have been souless. Our perspectives are different, because sex has never really been a battle ground for you and you have not experienced death in that area. You don´t know how to live, when all that you are, in feminine essence, is destroyed. Of course, what you become, is not so feminine, I am afraid. Our SEXUAL somethings, are bloody scarey for the average man.
So, you put conditions on intimacy. I, on the other hand, see it as something akin to a miracle, that I can still want intimacy with a man and that my soul can permit a man to touch me. It is not me being selective as much as I feel that it is God´s gift to me.
This was my song during the ten agonizing months of leaving. When a man’s idea of love doesn’t gel with yours…
There is no pain attached to any of this anymore. Just facts.
youtube.com/watch?v=pKd06s1LNik
“…Even if Obama were spiritual, that is not the “company profile” for the job. And with such high stakes for the controllers, they won´t think twice in offing him by a tragic accident. If you can see it, and I can see it, are you trying to say that he can´t?…”
Gatubela,
I’m not saying he can’t see it. I’m saying that his ‘role’ as President does not grant him absolute and final say to stop the Dark Plutonic monsters scheming behind the scenes in Washington.
Obama is a Leo Sun with 12th house oratory verve. He does not have singular rule over the nation or the world.
Leo in the occult (of my eyes):
Is the throne… aka the figurehead or “king” in our unfair human lot.
Not a warrior. Not a saint. Not a teacher. Not a protector.
Think of ‘king’ along the lines of the flamboyant image conscious king in the movie ‘Robin Hood’. A performer oblivious to the dear cries of his starving people. The king in that movie literally believes the solar system revolves around HIS inhuman hungers for external relevance. Pay attention to his fictional bravado, the smug posture and selfishness. In plain terms, he was a greedy pompous ‘child’ with a shiny gold crown on his head.
I quote a powerful eternal truth spoken in the movie Braveheart.
“Titles? (smiles). Men don’t follow titles… they follow courage.”
He was not power in the flesh (is my message).
Same with the English “King” in Braveheart. Another tyrannical child who believed his shiny gold crown and position bestowed him immortality. Again – the archetype of Leo entitlement.
So I’m saying Obama HAS SPIRITUAL ACCESS TO DIMENSIONS BEYOND the cut-throat games in Washington. He is no “tyrant” in a present-day world. But he is Leo. A Leo with hints of “a mystical” nature if you will. That’s all I’m saying.
Scorpio in the occult (of my eyes):
Is the ‘corrupted’ power (underworld INTENT in males- with ties to trillion dollar banks. Meaning catastrophic criminal activity that is ‘legislated’ and unregulated to be –“legal”.
Obama is a great orator Gatubela… that’s it. Someone writes his speeches and he vocalizes them. His job description is — “send the message we want” issued by?— the corrupted Scorpionic methods behind the scenes.
The horrors of who governs “us” is something you shouldn’t feel idealistic about. Because I’m sure you know through your life experiences, misplaced and rigid idealism IS NOT embraced with love and compassion in the punishing abusive world happening around us.
Hi Ppuppy,
The way you describe astrology, is like talking about the 12 pathes and their infinite combinations of how we are going to sin in our lives.
I have not idealized those horrors at all, despite your assumptions. Its just so intense, that I write only a little bit at a time, in order to not explode. ok? And you are absolutely right – Leo has no real power while shining so brilliantly.
LoL…it seems that Obama has better speech writers than Piñera, President of Chile. Instead of “Maremoto” which is ocean earthquake (tsunami) he said “Marepoto” which is ocean bum. (poto is bum in spanish). But hey…Piñera IS Corporate Chile, here in Chile. That explains the difference.
Hi Ines,
No…its not piscean, nor leo – wanting to feel someone´s heart. The heart is where the eternal energy is housed. If I don´t feel someone´s heart, its just a quickie. Pisces feels pychic energies, but they are elusive, passing through the person. Heart energies, have the possibility to be manifested.. Doing that, in truth, is hard, as P.Puppy already has mentioned.
Hey Umm,
Everywhere you look…
Bouncy-Uppity-Nifty-Nuisance-Yummy
B.U.N.N.Y
http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/highschool-prep-rally/ohio-cheerleader-sets-guinness-record-42-consecutive-handsprings-092919110.html
nuisance huh?;)..
my computer keeps freezing on this page, wont load or type properly,,,
Hi Gatubela,
People always mirror. Aggression is met with aggression, and ‘niceness’ with being ‘nice’, except.. Scorpios don’t ‘bring out’ negativity in others, they are just being themselves, and their truth is so radically different from what is accepted as the norm. People PERCIEVE it as negative and abrasive. And react, in negative and abrasive ways. And Scorpio truth is very simple really – I am who I am.
Yang energy is also incredibly selfish in its drive to move forward, nothing stands in its way… without balance it becomes destructive and empty, always searching for a new stimulant. And how does a woman deal with a man who has easy access to both types, which makes him seem so complex? For me… PLAYFULLNESS. Oh god, you can say the most outrageous things to your Scorpio if it’s done in a playful manner and lack of judgement. A fact can be stated in a million ways.. when I laugh and say ‘You are a selfish bastard’ and throw a pillow at him.. he drins, he GETS IT, he knows what I refer to. Remember.. they don’t miss a thing. The truth is, in a face to face communication Scorpio and Pisces break each other’s defenses easily.
Once a Capricorn female friend said to me ‘I am sorry for being rude the other day. it’s only because I can be myself with you.’.. So the truth of who we really are… we are many things, all of them in equal measure. And we choose to get to the middle, from that understanding…. or not, as the case is for most. Here is the thing…some energies are simply complimentary in the way they blend.. Constant bliss is as much an illusion as constant war, but compatible energies get through everything without leaving an emotional wrackage behind. So conditions on intimacy… well, I simply know what compliments me, an internal filter that takes out potentially messy situations with men.
My Ex’s Piscean Moon was hell bent on self destruction. I don’t pretend to be a saint, there is much I didn’t understand in the dynamics. He is heading for his third divorce, Taurean energy is set in its ways, he’ll never learn. He married again for fear of being alone (and let’s face it, lack of sex). There wasn’t love there, only fear and obligation, and he does things to her that he would never have done to me. I was his desire, and in retrospect, when I left – I broke his heart. But I had a toddler to take care of.
Your comment nearly made me cry.. I have an example of something similar in my friend’s situation. All this very personal, isn’t it.. I understand. It’s just for me.. I moved on from all that, can’t be held prisoner to what doesn’t exist, what exists is what I choose now. I feel that you have a lot of masculine energies in you, and the feminine is ignored by men, but it’s there, boy, it is, in the way you are here. I can’t take credit for not needing instruction in love, that’s how I was born, and believe me, in other things I struggle like hell, the masculine in me is asleep most of the time.
I’ve done it all, Gatubela: from one night stands, to short lived associations, to a marriage.. enough to understand that what I was looking for – is as rare as the Unicorn. An unconditional acceptance of who we all are. Everything else STARTS from that point. And people are simply unable to do that, some ciruitry is missing in their brains and hearts.
Life is like a forest.. some trees are taller, some are diseased and rot away, some are in the sunny spot and others – in the shadow. There are other species, like grass and flowers and animals… all different, yet all similar in their drive to live, how can one ‘judge’ them? The forest is still beautiful to be in, life is both simple and complex like that.
youtube.com/watch?v=KLVq0IAzh1A
“You’ll forget the Sun in his jealous sky”… meaning, love cannot happen if we project our ‘ideas’ of who we are, not who we really are – out into the world.
It’s a17 year old MR2. The amount of response it’s generated…
…crude, but sex sells LOL
http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/GENUINE-PUSSY-WAGON-TAXED-TESTED-STI-CLEAR-/161107374385?#description
Hey, my little hazelnut pimple…
Hug me with your broody dark eyes.
Your lost memory,
But I remember so clear, so simple
The day you fell into me from the skies.
Pluto’s dance with his sister, the Moon
In deep aquamarine Neptunian sea
Many years later and not a day too soon
I’m living in you, and you’re living in me.
Your ancient soul is learning fast
Hidden lessons of this human existence.
So fast…
The first conscious smile and a ‘huh’
To the tale of our walk that I told…
You really understood!
Sending my heart into a somersault.
Your glorious entry into the first step
That none of us could ever forget…
In the door frame, a look of wonder
In your face; you fall
And crawl
away out of sight
To step out again and again,
With a victorious cry,
My innocent showman,
This memory makes me sigh..
So many unfolded as years went by,
The preciousness of them not to conceal.
My little boy, my grown up man,
As we part, with a heart breaking ‘good bye’
We both know and feel
To be bound by an invisible thread.
The one true love of my life, I thank you
For all that you are, and for all that we had.
“Perfect Darkness”, courtesy of my son, his favourite…
youtube.com/watch?v=bTqUaeDL0pk
I don’t know how to express my gratitude to magic and spell cast. I have been a single mum for two months when my husband left me for another woman. I couldn’t stay without him. I was devastated and so lonely. I tried to beg him to come back but he wouldn’t listen to me or even pick my calls, then i decided to take to bringing him back at all cost. I tried a couple of spellcasters but no evidence that my husband was coming back till i came across this man online. I didn’t expect anything to happen but i kept my fingers crossed and just as magic is unbelievable my man came back to me some weeks ago begging me to take him. making promises of never leaving me and my son. Thanks Dr. muku of the olokunspellcaster@gmail.com
pluto,
is it my computer or has this site been corrupted? keep getting spinning wheel and frozen screen..
moon in scorpio today… im feeling it…
x
p.s i only just read your msg as I have been away..
Yes Umm… we are seeing soulless (unconscious) people typing, who don’t know why they type what they type on a computer screen. The vicarious world as witnessed every moment are people who have no sincere intent of relating. Why?… yes of course. Fear. Fear of feeling, and afraid of life in general. It’s completely ‘normal’.
Remember it’s all a game out in there among the culturally influenced believers of unconscious personalities. People are the product of what they believe and what they conceptualize. That concept of reality is warped and restricted and denied of the divine consciousness.
They (ego-personalities) literally see themselves as something ‘separate’ from other people, so they subconsciously ‘believe’ in their own self-created and self-defining myths. —> Which is why No empathy is shown here from those posts. Just insipid self-advertising. This is the conformed vicarious herd doing as they do…. as if they were pre-programmed, feeling-less drones.
This collective belief is a very distorted and confusing state for people in that separation. It is so deeply unconscious in them and so deeply carved in conformed belief… that they can’t see their own thought, or their own intent and shifts of feeling, and their meaningless behavior.
As I’ve said for a long time, the sheep perception of reality is a vicarious and scrambled one. It’s not an authentic one which is evolving-expanding-growing and ultimately ‘seeing’ by virtue of facing the lessons of Hades.
They only see survival (attachment) to every little “thing”… as evidenced with the utter disconnect we are reading here.
Hope you’re well and happy Umm.
I want to show you this video of a surprisingly intuitive mystic on Youtube. Ignore his ego and fuss as he lights/smokes his pipe etc… and listen carefully to how he describes the #19 card of the Tarot – the 19 card is one of ‘the Major Arcana’.
My birthday is Nov 19. The number 19 in Tarot mysticism is ruled by the Sun…which explains my elevated ego enlightened before you all here on the forum.
Yes I have ego. But it is not the everyday-ego among us which absolutely needs to attach itself to all the trivial crap in the superficial realm to exploit and deceive. My higher-ego is always moving and impermanent, it is vast beyond imagining. The sheer depth and expansiveness that I have traveled ‘within’ myself and others ‘is how’ I have found the treasure. The treasure of my instinctual feelings, intense sight, enabling courage that has resulted in awakened consciousness.
Imagine feeling/seeing psychic intensities in every single moment of your existence — while still maintaining sanity at the lower-self desires of attachment with people around you?
So this video. This guy obviously has occult knowledge. True – real occult knowledge which not many people in our human existences would truly understand. Why? … Because the experiences he is referencing and describing must be ……..actually experienced as to understand. The initiate/spiritual warrior is ‘seeing’ beyond the comforts of the 5 senses. But of course he knows the five senses too.
So I am a product of my experiences. Not pondered. Not intellectualized (in comfort).
Experienced!
Lots of love
Pluto
Btw… it’s important to note that 99% of all Tarot readers recite the same symbolism in texts that they read, then package that information as if it were ‘their own’. They package this knowledge because they are doing it for a buck. Not because they are “enlightened”.
Their extremely limited awareness makes them butcher the divinity of these secrets so they sell you as they were ‘fortune tellers’.
Almost every Astrologer,Tarot people you see online are – false prophets. The connection I emphasize here is that these fortune tellers simply recite occult text like a parakeet would – then they proclaim themselves to have “occult knowledge”.. This does not mean they ‘understand’ (actually live the awareness) of initiate occult realms. Their existence (awareness) is of this earth.
However the mystic in the video above is to me is a very rare exception. His insight reflects his wisdom. He is not fortune telling for the money or for self-promotion. This is a very important distinction. Yes, he has a website etc… but I know this guy breathes the occult, i.e I know he “knows” what ‘being’ a very old soul is… because he is one too.;)
beautiful!..and so very you. I loved the bit about the innocence..and the way he spoke..I agree, he felt genuine.(charismatic pipe smoking thrown in).
I love your enthusiasm PLuto:) you have the gift of understanding life through experience …and im so glad that you know truth and can see through the bullshit,.it is actually such a rare thing these days..it really is.
my bday is(was) 23. .. had a look out of interest at what mine would be and its the heirophant, it was interesting..
I am well..looking forward to summer and having time to do not much but laze on the beach.;) etc.
Im still having probs on this site.. not sure how to fix. maybe I need to see tech person in case computer has a virus.
so warm here tonight.. nice to hear the ocean ..
Yes the Hierophant is the number 5 card. That guy has a Part II video on the Heirophant stage of spiritual awakening which is very interesting. I relate my own life matrix of experience with every one of his teachings.
I’m about to write a part of me you haven’t seen before.
A few years ago when I was back in the States, I had this extraordinarily intense Hades obsession for a girl born April 23, 1981. She is the Hierophant archetype.
The feeling of sexual attraction so deeply and violently consumed me that I was out savagely fighting my sexual desires for her for over a year. The truth is we never had sex. But I was fighting tremendous inner battles when around her and away from her. In other words – I was possessed by the mystery of her. I was intensely drawn in by her naivety yet she behaved with unconscious methods for deceiving guys to get what she wanted financially, psychologically, sexually etc.
In retrospect, my infatuated projections of her essence and her values etc.. were extremely distorted for over a year of social contact. I had learned so much about myself and I could slowly see my evolution peeled away the falsehood of what was happening as real and true. Because even though I was compelled sexually and psychologically by this woman, I always detached myself psychically without thinking about it. It was instinctual detachment I repeatedly applied when in her presence. So I naturally detached my savage inner-ambivalence every time because that allowed me the space to get a better ‘view’ so to speak (as an Eagle would from the sky) of my obsessions with her.
So I never really possessed her in a manipulative personality context, because my willpower to detach psychically won. It felt as though heaven and hell were fighting through my psyche and body when with her and away from her. The experience is nothing like a crush. It was cataclysmic turbulence each moment. That in of itself compelled me to delve deeper into my own psyche.
Anyway she was that Taurus girl I wrote about a few years ago. I delved/probed her consistently in every interaction and had eventually uncovered who she really was beneath the prison of her insignificant ego. It’s not that we were on the same spiritual plateau… it’s that my projections of her soul at the time were infatuated by the idea of her. She was dark in many ways – lost. But over time I learned her fears were so great, that she could not change her lifestyle choices because THE COMFORT OF her lifestyle was to subconsciously protecting her form death. That “tower of littleness” was what identified with. Her vices were supposedly keeping her safe.
To make a long story short… my knowing of her lifestyle, her choice and vicarious attachment to ‘friends’, her severe alcoholism, her blatant greed and deceit of me and others, and her inner blockages (suffering/self-pity) eventually made me realize I was obsessed with a dark soul. My nature Umm… is a very nurturing one. I want to help, heal and protect those I feel who are suffering. But through time, I realized within myself that I was not healing myself by forcing to change and love others if they are crippled and blinded of healing themselves. In other words, the stagnation of her daily choices after knowing her for two years without sex on a social level, awakened me to see the truth of her stagnating and deeply unconscious existence.
The warrior in me challenged her self absorbed intoxicated bubble of self-illusion daily. But her choice to stay stuck in her insecurity always prevailed. The Taurus that she is, refused to budge. i.e to face ones demons and grow within, to change, to free herself of the bondage of her mental constructs. So of course her ego expression spoke as if she knew everything and her presumptions were expressed in a manner as if she was so much more privy than everyone else, that she didn’t see herself as needing anyone.
Yet with scores of friends around her, she was the loneliest person I have have seen. (Maybe not… there are many people in my life travels who have reflected that pain).
So the story of her coming into my life, changed my life forever. That incredible sequence of experiences was non-sexual, but I felt like I had known her for centuries.;)
Non sexual partnering has changed the dimensions of my life to level where I am now connected with the Force. Whereas when I was the young-wild stud bedding women with ease in my own suffering… I learned absolutely about myself or the vastness of an infinite experience. The sexual hungers (lower-self) during that stage of evolution had to be satisfied.
Hello Umm and P.Puppy,
The tarot is to be lived, as if you are in them yourself. Your relationship with the arcanes. Calling this kind of energy into your life, is very much like the Harry Potter wizard chess scene.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EXPFenHYidU
If your heart is not full of love, you will see one side of the energy and always be an outsider. You won´t see it , IN YOU. Being an outsider, means that you never master your own energies. No concept of choice…nor the beauty and love that this requires.
And when your mind submits, very much like chinese qi gong energy, (which is actually used, for aligning the chakras, and connecting to the subconscious energy of others in order to heal) then you will EXPERIENCE the other.
Love is the key to being.
I make love and impregnate the collective whole every moment through my being. I’ve never known any Leo who is the epitome of ‘being’. Because true beings can identify with humanity, and not as they try to control humanity. As mentioned many times in the past, the Leo lives his/her own illusion, which means they feel their life is ‘not real’. Do you get that? I know I’m connected to forces and am a part of something infinitely greater than me.
Try telling the masses around you what you are telling me. And then let me know their responses?
Tell that to people who bitch over who didn’t feed the dog yesterday, or the people that ‘think’ the external of themselves is relevant. I.e – almost everyone.
Realism is not idealism. The world is not always fun and games.
But thanks for the idealism.)
..”you will see one side of the energy and always be an outsider. You won´t see it , IN YOU. Being an outsider, means that you never master your own energies…”
Watch and listen to the Mystic again, Gatubela. The alchemical Sun has Transformed
He states at the end of the video… are “Universal Non-Conformists”.
A universal-nonconformist does not me I am loveless Gatubela. There are so many levels you don’t know I’m not going any further with this.
You are subconsciously saying I am not love, nor want love. Ha. I can only shake my head.
I see that you obviously don’t ‘understand’ what he is talking about. Nor do you know me after all this time. Love requires empathy to truly know (understand) others beyond the personality. Again, the Mystic understands the difference between the personality and the Individuality.
No one can truly understand what I am giving if they were not born to die.)
It’s better you ask me questions than placing your illusions of me as someone who is an “outsider” Gatubela. Funny, only a fixed personality would see that limitation. The personality does not have a direct line with God.
There is cruelty, hate, fear, greed, deception and suffering in human beings around you Gatubela. If you don’t or can’t recognize this existential truth… then hey.. that’s the range of your personality… which does not know death.)
I’ve always said I was a pariah. But my existential stage OF AWARENESS is nothing akin to not understanding what you are implying.
I was just attempting to share what happened to me, when I looked at the tarot. I don´t mind you misunderstanding it, as I have become used to what you feel I am subconsciously saying as being way off the mark.
I ended up being blamed for everything bad happening to people, and was called a witch. Lol…someone died and it was my fault. Do you think I could have told them that the dead person was already speaking to me and said he was alright? Could I have told them that I warned the person about to die, to be careful? That felt real enough. I don´t really know how leo is that, but when it happened, being “leo” did not matter. And when you say the things you do, in the cold way that you say it, it won´t matter how leo I am either.
Why would I tell the masses anything? I seem to have enough problems sharing in a blog where I am talking to people who seek spiritual yin energy.
Anywho…My cards were taken away from me and burnt. Very humiliating. I did have to feel love, in order to not go completely bonkers. It is what made me feel the planets.
The tarot was never meant for fortune telling. I just saw something more in them. They were keys for meditation. 19..the sun. Yang energy. Divine. Cosmic. For me, they showed something greater in ourselves, like Umm and you were mentioning. Pathes, occult knowledge.
I could not open the mystic you tube thingy, because I mentioned in the forum, how I could open links. You did not post them that way, nor did you give any further explanation as to who it was. So…it was not possible for me.
Empathy won´t be shown by me being worried about how wrongly you will be perceiving my subconscious intent and then re-posting trying to clear up these misunderstandings. But that´s all I seem to be doing these days.
You feel you are connected to something beyond…and I am just a simple woman who knows that I am no more than insignificant. Compared to you, I must be really small.
“I am just a simple woman who knows that I am no more than insignificant. Compared to you, I must be really small.”
No, not really small. Simply not in the present.
I was telling my story to Umm. You got involved. This turned into futility.
I should learn to speak my personal stories to a private party. Not to a public forum.
That’s the last of it.)
Umm… here’s my new email if you ever want to talk – valor4virtue@gmail.com
Darn public forums. I seem to be out to lunch here. I will be sure to put on my raybans and factor 60 on my soul next time when writing.
Be well P.Puppy.
testing testing one two three…..where will this get posted?? how many posts before spontaneous combustion? this post alone took half an hour…spinning wheel etc.. anyway.. remember the adventure..xxxxx (if you know what i mean) 🙂
My Scorpio and I have been together for 4 years. He is very much the scorpio who likes to hide things and it irritates me although I put up with it. A month ago he came to me to tell me something he was doing for me but I detected that he was hiding something. Not knowing until now how much the hiding is important to him, I told him to come and tell me when he was ready to share the whole story. He disappeared and I have not heard from him since. It’s been 4 weeks. I made the mistake of sending him emails (7 actually over the course of the month but I’ve stopped now). I just don’t know if he will come back or is done for good. I know he loves me and I love him intensely. He did tell me once that if there is no email from him that all is good, but is it possible that changed in his anger? I am prepared to wait but it’s not knowing that is making it so difficult. I am not sure if one month is a long time, but maybe nobody can tell me. Any reassurance to ease the pain would help, but honesty is good too. Thanks
Hi Sally,
“but is it possible that changed in his anger?” Why anger on his part, what makes you say that? There is something you are not telling us here.
“Hiding” is really nothing more than your perspective. If a woman wants to know every little detal about him and is not given that – it may seem like “hiding”. But what if she is not concerned with trying to read into his every word, expression and gesture (in her mind going over stuff and asking what on earth it might mean)? There is nothing really “hidden” then, is there? Perhaps, you are “overthinking” him.
The reality is… a Scorpio guy cannot be ‘explained away’. He can only be felt, in every moment of you being together, and from that an intuitive, heart felt response (from you to him) should spring up. It’s the only way this works.
Irritation.. imagine being with someone you know is irritated, but keeps it within (you ‘put up with it’ you said?).. as if he (your guy) can’t feel it… because he can LOL so hmmmm.. Puppy once said there is nothing wrong with expressing the gripe. I will add to this ‘It depends how you do it’. I expressed it to my Scorpio, and his response was ‘Teach me, and I will learn’. Simple. No irritation.
There is no truth and openness in ‘putting up’ with anything.
Hi Ness,
Thanks for your reply. To answer your questions…
You’re right. There are things I’m not telling you, but they are only the particulars of the situation which I prefer to keep private (I hope you understand) but will explain it as well as I can. He did something that he thought I would be angry about (I’m not, but he figured I would be). He suspects that I found out and so he offered to do something I’d been asking him to do for a while but wouldn’t, and this was sort of like a pay-off just in case I knew what he’d done. It wasn’t cheating or anything, but it was just something he’d done behind my back.
Anyway, he gave me a story of why he was offering to do this thing for me and at one point I got this really strong feeling that he was lying. His reaction pretty much confirmed it, but I reacted without meaning to and interrupted him, asking him to tell me when he’s ready to give me the full story. I wasn’t nasty, but I was straight forward about it. Normally I wouldn’t have. I would’ve just accepted what he was saying and let it go, but I’m human and like anyone I have my off days and this time I didn’t. This angered him and he disappeared.
As far as hiding being my perspective…yes, you’re right and the things he hid were not that important, that’s why I let them go and said nothing – things like going out with friends but giving me a different story – that sort of thing. Truthfully, I knew and didn’t care and even encouraged him to go out with his friends. Over time he began to share more so it’s not been a big issue for me, but truth is important to me and I guess this one day I was short tempered and just reacted. Normally I wouldn’t because he’s a very sensitive person.
I agree with you that I probably have been overthinking things. This is my first relationship with a scorpio and he’s completely different to anyone I’ve been with so a lot of this is new to me, but I have been working hard to adjust and am willing to accept all of him no matter what. I guess I just didn’t understand and he doesn’t really explain so I’ve been taking it a step at a time.
As far as putting up with it, maybe I didn’t explain on here too well. Truth is important to me. I understand that he is very truthful within his idea of what he needs to be truthful about. I accept this and although it irritated me, I wasn’t irritated ‘with him’ in my attitude. It didn’t anger me. I just would have preferred him to be a little more forthcoming but it’s a part of him so I figure I accept him as he is or not at all. I choose to accept him as he is.
As far as the gripe… I’m afraid this is a no-go with my man. He absolutely listens and I appreciate it and he actually makes changes which a lot of guys won’t do. I can’t fault him. He’s wonderful, but any comments in the slightest he takes to heart so completely that it hurts him and he sees it as a personal thing. I try to only comment when it’s absolutely necessary, but I’m sure I sometimes step on his toes without meaning to.
As far as truth and openness in putting up with things… I agree, but I don’t see it as ”putting up with it” and I don’t feel that way either. I consider that it is just a part of him and I love all of him just as he is. The truth thing can irritate now and then yes, but for like 5 minutes and then gone. I prefer to learn how to understand his needs and then if it’s something that I can give him and still be true to myself, then it’s all good with me. It’s just taken me time to learn because I’ve had my own stuff to deal with too.
My issue is this… I reacted when I should have heard him out. I made a mistake, plain and simple and I recognize this. I’m willing to give him his time and anything else he needs. I just don’t know if Scorpios in a situation like this will just walk away without saying it’s over. I guess it’s possible of course, but I suppose I’m looking for something positive to hold onto until I know for certain.
Sorry for the long reply and thanks for sharing your time. I appreciate it :).
Hi Sally,
Many contradictions in your account…
…”the things he hid were not that important, that’s why I let them go and said nothing” or “Normally I wouldn’t have. I would’ve just accepted what he was saying and let it go”… and then you say you would have preferred.. or although it irritated you, you weren’t irritated with him… who were you irritated with then? It didn’t anger you, yet you were short
tempered and reacted.. there are deeper reasons to all that, and to what you are trying to accommodate in reality.
Funny how little ‘unimportant’ things like those can lead to the big ones, as the one you are dealing with now. Can you see the connection?
Being private (not forthcoming) about aspects of one’s life and actually lying about things are two very different kinds of ‘hiding’. No one wants to lie within a personal relationship. People still do, why? Because for some reason they feel they cannot be 100% themselves around the person. What’s his reason?
It seems you accept his wayward ways (the lies), not accepting the real him. Which makes it as him being rejected really. I mean.. “he is very truthful within his idea of what he needs to be truthful about”… what’s his idea, do you know? What else is important to him if you look beyond the outward manifestations of ‘being sensitive’, not able to ‘take the gripe’ or explain things?
Your guy sounds like someone who actually does give a damn, except the terms of reference you both set for each other seem to be way out.. I mean.. “this was sort of like a pay-off just in case I knew what he’d done.” You are OK with that? Just that deals like you mention smack of insincerity and guilt. I would rather not ‘offset’ anything against anything.
Feels like a fake barter.
No one can give you reassurance on whether he will be coming back. You just have to ask yourself what he would be coming back to. He’s been testing your limits all along.
Thanks again Ness. Actually, regardless of what you think, you cannot possibly know our relationship from two answers. Nice of you to attempt to psycho-analyse, but I didn’t need that. I simply asked the odds of him returning or disappearing in general. It is a loving relationship. We had a disagreement, he disappeared. It’s really that simple. I only wanted people to tell me their view based upon whether they’d known a similar situation and whether the guy returned. Honestly, what is your problem? You are communicating with me as if I committed a crime. There’s nothing deep to try and figure out here. Have a nice life.
Hello Sally,
Well…not easy for me to say this…but the last time someone disappeared on me, I put my soul on the plate and was extremely honest in saying how I felt. I was not looking for him to come back. But I sure suffered. I don´t try to alleviate the potential suffering that may arise of the consequences of being honest. (lol—>*sniffle*) So, I prefer to be honest day by day.
I don´t know why he would hide things from you. Again, in my experiences, the truth is something that God lets you feel in your heart, if you surrender. The rest, is the lie. Its a different way of looking at it, I know.
However, there is something utterly divine about vulnerable honesty and sincerity. Scorpionic men know this in their dealings with women – the connection. And I know this, in my dealings with God.
Hello Ines,
Yeah..in the post where I was talking about the tarot, I was explaining the process of calling on the energy. When the ego surrenders. You can expect to feel all of your fears – which appear like those pawns on the chessboard. You try to pass through, but there they are, knifing you. If you feel love, the devils turn to angels. If you don´t, then you can fall into the tendency to abuse the energy, very much like fortune telling with the tarot. I have seen it alot in Chile. The dark shadows that fall in the aura of the tarot readers whose God, is the money they earn. It has consequences and it is not the complete spectrum of what this energy means.
The tarot, taking the sun as an example, are life paths. Meditating on the Sun, if done correctly, gives psychic impressions and opens our subconscious to deeper mysteries. Mine were taken away from me, but I just learnt, that the sacred temple is “me”. The pentagram, is “me”. The mysteries, are in “me”. So…No games! It was me, on that chessboard, and I nearly died.
I admit that when I learnt this, no one had any idea that I was meditating so much, while doing the dishes. I was hiding too. I was called process oriented and sexually dead. My husband talked badly about me, to every “dude” he met. How sexually inadequate I was.
I mentioned qi gong, because it is the practice of aligning our inner energy. Without knowing it, I was doing the initial stages of these very complex meditations and channelling my spiritual qi. It is considered more effective therapy than accupuncture,if done correctly, always balancing and connecting to the divine. Divine qi, is the only energy that can be recharged and increased. The mind, kills “life”. So, as an example, the tarot can also help us align our energy through understanding “the sun”.
I guess I said it wrongly. P.Puppy´s honesty just inspired me to share a bit of my experiences of the tarot when he an Umm saw themselves as part of it.
Hi Sally,
No, not a crime. I wonder what makes you say that.
He’s gone, and you are here… If YOU don’t know (the woman closest to him).. how can people here GIVE YOU THE ODDS of him returning or not… Millions of similar situations could have happened, and yours would still be different, because there are two unique people involved.
Throw the dice for the odds. Doesn’t help to see anything, but does keep one agonisingly suspended in the wistful mode.
OR… you could try to understand what brought it on.
That’s if you want to.
Hi Gatubela,
Yes, it’s clearer now what you meant.
I found the video. youtube.com/watch?v=uWQTkWnHOIA
In the tarot path of evolution my card is Justice, and my son is 20 – Judgement. I always identified with him as being way.. older than me? He never calls me ‘mum’, just by my name, except for very tender moments of vulnerability.. Also strangely..like you, without knowing it, he attempted to meditate at 14, looking for what he calls ‘a prismatic view of reality’… it was instinctual in him. In truth, I am in awe of him, because he IS those things, without actually learning anything about them.. HOW he deals with life is mind blowing. He certainly commanded respect from an early age from all around him, naturally, without moving a finger.
I understand the Tarot symbolism and the Middle Way of Justice card… attainment of Balance within and of bringing the conflicting, opposite energies into the centre.. Again, I spoke about Acceptance; that sprung from within, and this is the manifestation of my path – acceptance of all there is, without tipping over to either side. From there come life choices
that remove drama and upheavals, as those, too, are understood/felt as an integrative part of Life. In my specific Sun identity it can only translate as dissolution of hostility and conflict through peace (balance), and the Ascendant teaches me about Evolution of PERCEPTION through developing an objective (mascuilne) view amidst the chaotic femininity of my makeup.
The natal chart reflects where within life path we will meet obstacles and how we will be challenged. Mine are certainly NOT within the realm of sexuality or personal relationships.
Now I don’t identify with any existing divination/evolution/Enlightenment movements, systems, frameworks blah blah… Why? Remember, in my post 1414 I expressed what FELT as the ‘me’, the Source, it was tangible energy to the right of me, that’s when the penny dropped… So… Tarot, astrology or even meditation.. any controlled spiritual practice.. do not feel relevant to me anymore, experiences from people and events – do. Of course I had to read and understand a few things first, but I’ve moved on from that too.
What comes next – I don’t know.
Hello Ines,
The divine is beyond me.
Every relationship for me, is a question and choice to be offered to God. Because every person has a soul.
And the divine shares with me.
There is no ‘personal God’, Gatubela. Meditate, pray, channel the energy… we are talking to ourselves, there is no one listening upstairs.
Tomorrow is the Full Moon eclipse… soak its magnificence, The Moon’s been looking down on this world for aeons. This is it. And when we die, if you are a Christian – you will see Christ. If you are a Buddhist – you will see Buddha, if you are a Muslim – you will see Muhammed.. and then you will move on from those – to meet the Divine, clear, undiluted, it speaks no language and has no affiliations to our conjured up feeble myths and fairytales and beliefs..
This is the connection. There is nothing to seek, we are already BEING that. Nothing, but change (death) in every single moment of existence, so many levels we can never comprehend even a tiny part of. NEVER.
And if you feel Eternity… have you ever wondered why suicide is considered a ‘sin’ all over (I’m not talking about messy desparate attempts to take one’s life out of perceived ‘difficulties’)? Or why karma from previous (physical) lifetimes is such an important notion? there are hidden reasons for that.
Reconciling Eternity with mortal life is not easy, is it…
How do the Dead speak to you?
Hello Ines,
Well, that´s the theory – of which any can do, but its not the verb. Its not how I do things or why.
I may not like too much sunlight, because I burn easily. I was in Cancun recently for a business trip, and all I did was hibernate in my room. I did go to the beach at 06:15 in the morning however. But just because I don´t like stuffy humid icky jungle climate and I feel the need to shower every 5 minutes, it does not stop it from existing. There is a kind of “will” that explains the natural movement of things as if we are a result of something bigger.
When I see my world changing, its like I can feel that “will”. LoL…sure as hell is bossy. I never feel as if “I” have any control over my life – even as a child.
For me, there is something to seek. because It would transform me on deep levels.
I honour death and I like the dark as I feel it through my heart energies (very respectful) – silence and solitude. It feels very soothing and relaxing. Darkness is the only thing that does not try to merge to you (like peoples darkness which is very noisey) but expects you to find it and merge with it through purity. Dark waves splashing on me….complete silence so I can finally emerge, naked and be myself. Its where I feel free. Maybe that´s why dead people share?
I feel comfortable in solitude. It’s what I AM and what I love.. But it’s not what I need to grow and change.
We face different, often opposing forces in life, and what is your cure – might prove to be my poison.
The voice doesn’t say ‘Love thy nature and submit to it’… it says sometimes ‘Dive against it’.. The more frightening it is – the closer to the Truth.
Gatubela,
Puppy isn’t saying this in a cold way, on the contrary. He’s saying it in an inpassionate way., as it matters to him. And I couldn’t open the Youtube video either, no link attached, so…
Puppy,
I haven’t got a clue what Gatubela was trying to express in her post, but it wasn’t directed at you, subconsciously or not. You misread it.
From being here I learned that personal stories can only be given to those who care about us – personally.. Not a bad leasson to learn.
Umm,
Your computer doesn’t have a virus, don’t waste your money on a techy guy. Scripting one webpage which has thousands of comments takes A LOT of CPU processing, hence the lags. Other pages on this same blog load normally.
Kindergarten, honestly….
Puppy,
Remember I asked you that question about another place on the internet… and found out now it wasn’t you? (I inwardly laughed at your head games, Sir, you are damn good)… I asked about the Sun sign of that person, because the resemblance was too great, near identical to you… the answer was “Aquila The Eagle” 😀 My instincts never let me down 🙂
He reads my poems on my blog.
P.S. I do exchange e-mails with the psychopathic murderer too LOL Call me nuts. I like to learn…. about other people psyche. Helps with my own.
Be well on your life travels, darling.
Gatubela, something has just occured to me.. the Tarot, the last three cards (Stages) on the Path… 20, 21, 22.
The Leo lady with Sag Ascendant I met many years back, when she was at a stage I’m now, and I was… nowhere. Somehow we formed a strong connection then, coming together and separating over the years, but the connection never broke, it’s like time doesn’t really matter, and I see it as spiritual in essence, norishing to both, that’s how it feels, She says she likes to be around me. I’m the same around her.
She came into it from a bad car crush, took her years to arrive at a state of Transcendance. She is not much of a Leo in the way she is, certainly, not classic.. She is Scorpio Mars in the 12th, and two stelliums in the 8th and 9th houses.And I just realised.. she is a Cusper. Like my son who was born only a few hours before the Sun went into Aries.. one of my best friends is a Gemini/Cancer cusper… a Scorpio friend I used to have a very intense relationship with was 22 of Nov.. the guy who has feelings for me – is a Capricorn/Aqua cusper..
20, 21, 22. Tarot.
Could be a theory too, but on a feeling, instinctive plane.. all the people on a Cusp I’ve known – have a very strong energy signature.. strong in a sense that they are – different from others, in many subtle ways.. it’s like they see something others don’t. I seem to draw in a lot of Cuspers into my life (even my son LOL), and all those associations have been/are very meaningful and deep and not easily forgotten.
People feeling comfortable around eachother´s energy is very beautiful. When I was a child, my parents would say that I could not listen into their conversations, even though they were talking right in front of me. I got really hit if I did. So…I truly…did not.
I learned to tune people out, in my mind and in my surroundings. I imagine that if you are pisces, knowing how to do that would be important, because of the merging thingy. Its a kind of respect for me, to be able to share, but not intrude. Very objective energy and a social one as well, as you feel others very keenly but also know to give them a room in your soul. So, leo sharing with pisces, just warms the water a bit and keeps the fish warm? While pisces waters may cool leo down considerably, unless the heart is strong. Her mars in scoprio seems interesting–very sensual fighter? Maybe she takes her clothes off in an all or nothing way and gets naked in her aggressive state. LoL.
I don´t know too much about the tarot Ines. It was pretty traumatic having them taken away from me, that I also learnt to never let those things be known about me by anyone. Laying the cards and knowing the theory, meditating on them, did not help me live my life and my terrible circumstances were still there at the end of the day.. I don´t consider myself a transcendant soul, but I do know what transcendence is. Due to the fact that I can be more that what I currently am, it still means nothing in the grandscheme of things, as what I am now, is “the lower form” of the best of me. Does that make sense? I could be a super Goddess, and still be only following the “will” or reason of why the sun shines or the universe exists in the first place. But while I am on this earth, I suppose that I better be in tune with that will, as much as I can.
Cusp energy – is the borderline between the two signs, right? Is there an astrological thingy in your birth chart that can give you insight as to why?
Hi Gatubela,
I don’t think there is anything in the chart to indicate that, and I honestly stopped analysing charts… whatever happens now is just internal shifts. Perhaps, people on the cusp deal with conflicting energies, which makes them complex, and my quadruple Pisces is that way too.. like attracts the like, who knows.
I use myself as a barometer when feeling people. From those Scorpio Mars folks I know… this energy doesn’t feel at all aggressive. It’s very volatile though. I said before, from men especially (I’ve known three so far) – it feels dangerous, not in a malicious way, but I can see how people may perceive it to be as such, it’s just that I understand volatility. I wouldn’t call it direct either, it can be quite deliberate in the way it reaches out for goals.
She is more like a healer, completely surrendered and a beautiful soul.
Leo and pisces LOL… it’s like two aliens wanting to forge an intergalactic treaty, neither very sure of each other’s convention.. The heart is always there.. amazing. I was in a hospital two months ago.. nobody at all knew. A Leo gal that I know turned up at my bed… she works in the system and saw my name on the list. Leos really do go where the heart takes them, there is a wonderful simplicity in that which I appreciate. But on a feeling level – there is usually not much, unless there is a strong water component.
Remember how I accused you once of not answering my questions.. I do recognise a lack of space in it now. I kind of felt you were hiding, like you say ‘never let those things be known about me’.. maybe, it’s the Cancer Moon, as well as what you went through? I just feel you see things that I don’t, fascinating and not universally spoken about… from my conversations with people I know that most are reluctant to share things they cannot logically ‘explain’, for fear of being accused of being ‘abnormal’.. But it really is OK. I’ve heard some fascinating stories from people now, which open up other dimensions. One more reason why I don’t concern myself with divination systems anymore. Like you say.. doesn’t help to live (experience) life.
Yes, merging… actually, I didn’t learn to tune people out, that would be impossible. But I learned to separate what doesn’t belong to me. Also, it’s the internal noise that arises from nowhere.. for instance, I started writing this in a balanced state, but am feeling anxiety now (anxiety is a signal, doesn’t mean another feels that), not from writing, but something else, not my energy, I feel it as my mum’s right now. I ALWAYS acknowledge and check it out from within… like cradling an object internally. I’ve learned now to understand when it’s not mine. My own tend to stay for a while, while another’s – usually quick and goes within minutes.
Because I’ve had enough solid tangible confirmations – I trust it now.
Gatubela, I will be quiet for a while. Just feel the need to.
x
” Due to the fact that I can be more that what I currently am, it still means nothing in the grandscheme of things, as what I am now, is “the lower form” of the best of me. Does that make sense?”
You haven’t let go, Gatubela, not in a true sense… there is no merit in ‘seeking’, and you cannot be MORE than what you currently are… the Ego has a thousand ways to disguise itself.. Life will smash this belief into smitherins, trust me. And there is a price to pay.
…it’s name is Apathy, an unrelenting and unforgiving stage, the Black Dog which robs one of TRUE intent and action, bites one in the ass and says ‘There is nowhere to run anymore… you are totally mine’. There is no love in there, but real Death, nothing left to search, no God, no spirituality, no world, no Absolute.. the point beyond which lies Simplicity.
It’s the waves, can’t be helped, just go with it. Surrender is so much deeper than anything you imagine.
Hello Ines,
There is no such thing as easy spirituality.
I am not a flower just waiting to surrender! The energy does not work that way because I will still have ego. The illusions will come up in the form of “what is above, is not below” or “What is below, is not above.” The truth comes out, through preserverance. So, there is a time for everything. I have noticed, that that biblical statement, is reflected in the planets.
Anything I choose to do, will only get destroyed, eventually, if these energies don´t align. Because I will explode.
Life and death must meet.
Or..heaven and earth, fuse, in me first.
Be well Ines and enjoy your rest..
Gatubela, it’s not how one expects it to be.
It never comes from crumbling of external structures, those have already collapsed.. and what does it have to do with our individual life stories.. absolutely nothing, just pointers on the way.. It comes from a total assault from within, total COLLAPSE. Not even collapse of beliefs, ideas, world view… a long road to the collapse of the Psyche.
Ever asked WHAT THE FEAR IS ALL ABOUT?? Fear of own meaningless existence. THE FUTILITY OF IT ALL… An honest look at reality of being.. and all else you hear – are shameless fairytales, believe nothing. If Divine Discontent is not part of your intrinsic makeup, life circumstance will take you to that point and demolish all illusions in the process…. as you know.
Your existential questions – will disappear. Your existing reasons for living – will vanish in an instant. Your desire to ‘become’ – will evaporate. ‘Soul’ or ‘God’ will not resonate. Relationships, families, children, aspirations.. ridiculous programming of Enlightenment, with chants of peace, or warm and fuzzy sensations of all encompassing love, or wanting to be ‘a better person’, or liberation from suffering.. Make-believe of a permanent halo.. Wake up, people, it has nothing to do with Awakening.
…not many understand what self love TRULY means.. what it IS… what is it like to be YOU? Close your eyes and feel it. Sense for you. Think for you. Feel for you. Perceive for you. Who. You. Are. Every answer you come up with – will require a definition, lie upon lie.. insignificant, Samaritan, stubborn, paryah, intelligent, Scorpio, initiated, woman, curious.. all lies, a currency of convenient identities in this world of perpetual survival struggle. Groups live, individuals – perish. So hurdle all together into a dream..
And it will just dawn on you, nothing like you imagined it would be, no Big Bang, no rainbow colours.. so quiet in the way it happens, like nothing happened, and everything did. The elementary Truth of your Being. There is – No Self, NEVER HAS BEEN. There is NOTHING to look for!!! All meanings are earthly fear expressions wanting to combat Futility!
Faith cannot come from blind deceitful illusion, perpetuated through countless institutions of human thought and power. Most ‘liberated minds’ and ‘spiritualised egos’ wouldn’t go there, they break the fall into the pit and get stuck on the first rung.. still ‘searching’ for Unicorns in every conceivable philosophy, blind fools.. or may be it’s best not to know, huh.. the mere simplicity of it makes it obscure and hidden – hidden IN FULL VIEW. I’ve known this truth my entire life, never consciously accepting it, running away in terror. There are levels of reality, and at this human mortal level – I probably will have to ask the dog for wisdom, it has more of it than an entire human population. Doesn’t take itself (Self!!!!, it’s hillarious!) seriously.
Take any word of importance to you… dictionary ‘definition’ is just the start. Levels of MEANING will be as deep as you want to go… drop into each one of them, with your entire feeling, breathing being. Do it with each one of those ‘words’, they are only representations of Mind. Then – CONNECT all those, the truth will JUMP at you, punch you in the face… and the whole picture will emerge. Building back up again from the point of unflinching, raw, bleeding truth is liberation. And another story.
I’ve developed heart pulpitations in the last two days, it has been nothing like I know.. Gatubela.. you are a beautiful being, it’s good to know you exist in this Universe. Go on, the truth is there for the taking. Just that… be careful what you ask for. It may be much more comfortable in the pain of the world as we’ve known it.
Hi Ines,
I thought you were taking a rest!
The idea of being able to choose, means its all about family, God etc., as we strive to encompass and expand the concept of multiple truthes and realities.
Your heart has been dead for a bit…that´s all. What you are feeling is what the human race has collectively done with these energies….NOTHING. You must be connected to those very depressing energies through your heart! Mortal extremes of illusions. Zombie vibes. I hope that you hang on and accept that you should not base your spiritual growth on perceiving “HUMAN dead energy”.
Well…humans are not the role models for what to do with divine energies. They dip into this sacred cosmic matter and put the wrong will into it. No one takes these energies and moves them to the other end of the spectrum. Its unknown territory …because without the heart chakra open, it will all end in zombie living dead.
Concepts confuse me, Gatubela. They are like some common language invented for the purpose of debate, but it never becomes ‘common’, people always bring in their own meanings. Taken out of context of their meaning – it becomes meaningless. I don’t understand what you mean by ‘divine energies’.
There are no muptiple realities. Reality is One, and I’m in the process of getting to it whatever the cost. Everything else are multiple conceptualisations of it, cooked up with and transmitted through the filter of egoic (thought) Personality. It’s my MInd which has been dead.. not the Heart, not the psychic responsiveness of my body.. a trapped Mind.
Superfluous interactions make me ill, I’ve reduced those to bare minimum, even with my own son.. thankfully, he is a no nonsense, direct son of b****, so I don’t wax lyrical to him. Otherwise.. I’ve pretty much checked out of this life. It doesn’t feel depressive. It feels like I’m on a mission, there is no more mission choice as there is in ordering a new born back into the womb. There is a natural state of Existence in the Universe – The Flow. We forgot how to follow it.
Anything I write becomes obsolete almost instantly, as more things come in. I’m not done. There is MORE.
rest rest, there is no rest, I just can’t contain it.. the MAGNITUDE of it all… I’m crying for the first time in months, just overwhelmed, the feeling of being totally overwhelmed by all that unfolded.. gratitude, GRATITUDE
Truth is only multiple if you view it from the ground level. down there is a magnitude of ‘truths’, all dressed in robes of desire, greed, lust, aspiration.. all those truths come from dark dark places, with never a sun ray in sight.The real thing is Absolute and comes from ‘no belief’. AN EMPTY SPACE. Nothing created it and nothing destroys it… it’s eternal, it cannot be explained, it can only be known. Absoute Truth is the same for everyone, it just that it is not SEEN.
What I put down on paper is so FEEBLE compared to its sprouted seeds inside.. so… IMPORTENT, any description of Realisaton is misleading, people take things literally, and it’s nothing but.. all the words written down the centuries, all the wise men – couldn’t convey a fraction. There are no rewards, nothing will be ‘easier’ and everything is freedom.. birth passage from Binary Universe into Unity.
“There is no other” we are on our own from there on, and never alone.
youtube.com/watch?v=HT2789urycI
The Truth is uncomplicated and always the bottom line.
….the primeval Unknown – the unknown of Death.. You dance in this world as you know it, but what’s ‘over there’? Don’t rely on what any tradition tells you, because the fact is – WE DON’T KNOW. That’s your primary fear. Don’t believe it? Wait till you get a cancer diagnosis and watch your world crumble.
… ‘Self’ in your being exists no more than it does in the being of an ant. The only difference – the ant doesn’t think (create) it. Your life is no more meaningful than the life of an ant. That’s your secondary fear.
…without consciously facing the facts of your meaningless and perishable existence (the Futility) – you KNOW those at a very deep level. You frantically look for reasons (ego identities) to exist. Pick any, there are millions, have them stuffed down your throat by the world.
…What did you say you wanted to be as a four year old? You just wanted to be, nothing more. Now, the weight of Ego feels a heavy cross. How? Go back into your body and mind for that niggling sensation, the Void, even when your world looks bright and cheerful.That’s ‘no Self’ screaming against the heavy weight on top.
…. Suicide.. what’s wrong with suicide? Absolutely nothing. The act of (unconscious for most) checking out frightens the rest of us into the spectre of Futility. So suicide is branded as’sin’, the ‘love of God’ is withdrawn. What kind of ‘God’ does that?
…It doesn’t. Life (you) is God and never withdraws. The Source of Wisdom in your purposeless and No-Self Being is INSIDE your Being Consciousness. So kill the Buddha, every one of them, they have nothing to teach you.
… The illusion.. after a sobbering up period you may begin to ENJOY the Illusion, with your eyes fully open to its peculiar expressions.. Let’s face it – there is NO ALTERNATIVE. It’s all that ever BE. And if you believe in reincarnation… I repeat.. that’s all that ever BE. Period.
… compassion.. a tricky one, if you are brainwashed to believe that selfless giving ALWAYS enriches.. Life energy has to flow. It’s ‘give and take’, or else it gets depleted at the Source. Compatible energies function at this principle: the flow of unconditional (no expectation) energy exchange. Sounds an oxymoron? Whatever. You KNOW it’s true… ever had the life sucked out of you, for all your selfless giving?
… love.. The dog doesn’t set out to be loving. When you accidentally stepped on its tail – it will bite – sincerely. And will forget about it – instantly. Anything and everything UNFOLDS in the dog universe, and the dog – BE in it. The dog – loves. In other words.. how you wash dishes is as much about love as how you treat your people. Love is EVERYTHING you are and be. Get it?
…Purpose. Realising there really is none – will set you free, the struggle to find ‘it’ is gone. Find out what you want. In this lifetime and in this body. That will be your purpose, even if it’s just tending a vegetable garden at the back. Your purpose is what you love doing. Nothing else.
…. Lies. Enlightenment is not a steeplechase, not moments of Bliss, not a puzzle.Unneccessarily complicated ‘teachings’ made into a massive business.. Does it FEEL TRUE that transcendent people cannot feel anger or express it? Oh come on.. transcendent people are not mutants of humanity.. but they wouldn’t be inclined that way much. Does it takes a lifetime to get to Enlightenment.. really? is there a rule which says that? Seeing ‘The Purple Eye’ or doing the astral travel is manifestation of being Enlightened… so you’ve travelled… can you SEE THE TRUTH?
Get to the truth… QUESTION every assumption, feel it RESONATE within or not. YOU are the only Authority. I’ve spent two intense, solitary years in the burning, all consuming passion to know. As it turned out Truth is simple… YOU, the Being….. – are THE BE ALL AND END ALL.
Puppy, this is for you. Thank you.
youtube.com/watch?v=phktiVZqUbQ
I’ve been writing pages and pages, it’s madness, yet, I’ve never been as lucid, with such clarity… I am possessed, I write not because I want to share, teach, validate, curtsy.. I write because I have to get THIS out of my system.. all that suddenly opened up, and all the questions seem to have answers..
EVERYTHING is valid only in CONTEXT. Anyone vague about spiritual answers – haven’t got a clue about the questions, have no idea what anything MEANS, or are trying to sell you something..
So.. THE CONTEXT.
… Illusion.
Look at this often cited by spiritualists.. ‘All is Illusion’.
…look at the word ‘illusion’. Now feel the chair cushining your ass.. the chair has a physical form, as I have a physical body. No one claims the chair isn’t really there.. Why then can it be called an illusion? Because…. PERCEPTION of it will vary from an organism to an organism.. dogs don’t seem to have colour vision, so will perceive the chair differently, while your sense of smell will make the dog think you are a retard LOL.
…Subjective perception.
Objective reality is dictated by subjective perceptions – yours, mine, dog, worm, tree, fish… in case of humans it will also be – subjective MENTAL perceptions in the form of thoughts. The emphasis is on the word ‘Objective’ , NOT on the word ‘reality’. Physical reality exists. Objective physical reality – does not. Get it?
REALITY does exist. OBJECTIVE reality doesn’t exist.. People take this statement as a non existence of physical form all together.. If it has nothing to do with physical form (or so they are lead to believe) it must mean that there is some miraculous supernatural force in place? Look up to the sky? Can you see the trap immediately created by No Context?
Now, look at the word ‘illusion in its HUMAN world context, as in human life on this earth. the fairytales that people unconsioucly believe about themselves, about who they are, who everybody else around them is.. ever looked at another and had this feeling they are doing so much ‘better’ than you.. ever made those comparisons while checking out others on Facebook? Thankfully, I don’t have an account, never did and never will. Go back into that and remember that feeling again.. as if you are an impostor in this life? Everyone is doing better than me, she is more clever, pretty, happy, he has a nice family blah blah… Guess what, people are looking at you and thinking the same. Life is one massive FACEBOOK. What’s there not to call an illusion? It DOESN’T EXIST outside YOUR CRANIUM. All bullshit, coming from the fact that you haven’t got a clue who you are, behind the facade. There are thousands of ghosts populating your head,,, past relationships, failed jobs, relatives that weilded power over you, concepts of philosophy, history, art, science; they all shape us into someting alien to our OWN essence. YOUR OWN. Distinctly different from that of others. Your essence TRANSLATED into human world may be logic, or artistically creative, or a human calculator, or a beautiful voice, or a heart for kids, or legs for running, or a jungle adventurer. The rest are – what you are not, the externals… An illusion.
…. Dream..
Another favourite, ‘Life is a Dream’… what’s there to say.. if you live someone else’s (your imaginary ‘you’) life – you are dreaming.
…Emotion..
You’ll become emotion-less. You will have LOTS of feelings. They will come like clouds, no value judgement attached, and will leave as quietly. It’s bliss on its own. There will be no peace or love, you will BECOME love. A sense of awesomeness and WONDER will pervade you.
“I know I’m connected to forces and am a part of something infinitely greater than me.” Yes. Everything I wrote above – I mentioned somewhere before. When Realisation hits you, you UNDERSTAND the layers of every meaning, those shallow one’s you touched upon before from your limited perspective, glimpses of what is – yes, infinitely greater, there is no end to it, it will keep rolling. There is NO LIMIT to Consciousness, YOUR Consciousness.
Don’t equate Spirituality with metaphysics or mystical experiences, though they will play a part.. Spiritual is about breaking yourself down to basics and getting to that real thing – your OWN spirit, your essence. Never too late, will hurt like hell, will destroy everything you hate AND everything you love. EVERYTHING YOU LOVE TOO!! Make no mistake about it, THIS ONE will be the hardest of all.
The word ‘Surrender’ is misleading. Mis -leading. It’s ONE step on the way.. which may NOT take you there at all, but without surrender it won’t happen. It’s the moment when you’ve given up the chase, basically. Of everything. In normal language – you want nothing, don’t give a shit about anything, yourself included. All you want is to die, physically.
The actual Realisation is a light bulb moment, but not about little pieces of this and that.. those have been coming in gradually over the course of weeks, months and years, depending on how long you’ve struggled.. the actual light bulb moment encompasses EVERYTHING. In one broad sweep. It’s like something has suddenly rearranged in your head, and things fell into Clarity.
You are able to see from high above, the entire view of Life. Things will look different. Don’t take it literally here.. the leaves will still be green in colour, and the mall will look like a mall, and you won’t levitate. There will be no strange music in your ears, and no thunderbolts.. unless you are having a mystical experience at the same time.
You may not quite believe it at first. How can it be so… not like what they describe? That’s because no one can adequately describe colour ‘red’ to the blind. Try, right now. You’d have to use the language the blind understand: touch, smell, sound… A sound of red,,,, makes any sense to any normal seeing person? Hardly.
You’ll know everything changed, but what’s there to SHOW FOR IT? All the struggle, pain, losing your mind, practically giving up on life.. what is there to show anyone? Absolutely nothing. That’s the paradox. It’s YOU who stepped out of the Known. Your physical appearance hasn’t changed. Your home is still the same. You haven’t become ‘perfect’ in any way, and haven’t developed supernatural abilities. But it’s not ‘you’ how everyone and your former Self have known. The Being is of a different kind. And there’s not a penny of evidence on the surface. Ah the beautiful world we live in.. all on the surface.
You CAN’T GO BACK. If you try – IT WILL HAMMER YOU. it’s an irreversible thing. It will deepen in time, already you know that your interactions have changed, have been changing for some time. You’ve lost desire to convert anyone or talk about anything spiritual, hey.. can anyone ‘die’ during a course of one conversattion? You will acutely feel the lie when it’s being dished out to you. You won’t settle for frivolities of an interaction. It will make others uncomfortable.
You’ve gained the world, because.. there is nothing in the world to gain. Any identity is available.. any course of action is open. Everything is just.. there. “Infinitely greater than me”… your Personality ‘me’. Personalities don’t grow. There is nothing ‘greater’ in them than what already is. The real ‘you’ has an infinite capacity to evolve.
Meditation will not take you anywhere, and you can spend decades on chasing ‘internal peace’. If anything, meditation is about subjugation of energy, and that may not work for everyone.. Inside your body the energies (hormones) will rush, the blood will circulate taking them around. If you are anything like me – it will be there no matter what. Breathe. Stretch your body really really tight. Dance if the mood takes you. Let it all run inside faster, reach to your brain and dissolve into whatever function it’s there to perform. The body is absolutely marvelous, it KNOWS what it needs.
An empty space is not a space without thoughts, forget this, it’s a lie.. Thoughts will be there regardless, and even when you observe them passively.. they will do everything to drag you back into Unconsciousness, the little monologues and dialogues people constantly run inside their heads. An empty space is where you’ve lost every bloody belief in every bloody thing in the world. DISILLUSIONED. Connect the dots? The language itsef gives a clue, if people have capacity to realy look deep. Disillusioned. Everything is gone. Everything you cared for in any way – is not there anymore = you don’t give a shit. AN EMPTY SPACE. Meditation will not give you that.
Meditation in its classical form – doesn’t explain to peope where they are heading – to the breakdown of themselves. The only thing that will explain it to you – pain of unbelievable proportions.
Sure, no guru will tell you that you need to get totally fucked up, burn down to ashes, before Life takes you back up. It’s all nicey nicey in the world of conventional spirituality = a lie.
Below is taken from a blog I used to read. We spoke on the phone once. It was enough. This person had a TRUE NEAR DEATH EXPERIENCE. Does it mean anything in terms of awakening? Not a dime. Not everyone who had a chance of this kind – will ‘die’.
Internet is full of drivel like that.
—————–
It’s when I understood there were things once done that could never be undone …
… words spoken that could never be unspoken …
… actions and experiences that seemed like they would haunt me for the rest of the days of my life …
… it was in that moment that I discovered me.
And since that day I have been on a journey to BE the real human I was and AM created to be.
Kind
Loving
Gentle
Truthful
Compassionate
Understanding
Spiritual
Seeker
Giver
Builder
We all have pasts.
The incredible miracle of this truth is that you can let your past define you positively or negatively.
I choose positive and hope you do too; because YOU, like all the rest of humanity are a very wonderful you.
Your Mind and your Consciousness are not one and the same thing. Your MInd (thought) and your body (feeling) will take you into your Consciousness. Consciousness simply means being Aware, and levels of Awareness are plenty.
I contemplated why meditation took the form it did… What do you think the Buddha was doing under that tree (we don’t even know he existed, but let’s assume, for the sake of the argument, that he did)? Do you think he was ’emptying his mind’? No. The guy set himself a task to UNDERSTAND everything of this life. He contemplated by asking himself questions and finding the answers. Searching for the Truth. Then a bunch of devotees came in and turned everything into a show. A man sitting under a tree for forty whatever days in silence – mst be surely just relaxing. The fact is (again, assuming the chronicles are true) that he tried every thing going, before collapsing into his tree sitting activity. None of it worked. The ONLY thing that worked – his own enquiry. HIS OWN QUESTIONING. He wasn’t ’emptying his mind’. He was using his Mind as a tool, the only thing it’s designed to be.
If he could – so can you.
So, the Mind as a tool.. lions have claws, zebras have legs, fishes have fins etc. etc. all tools to be used to make LIfe continue. Humans don’t have such advantageous things, but they have the Mind. Asleep in most, not going anywhere beyond everyday needs for survival and squabbles over who takes the trash out LOL. The ironic thing is, if it was used in a way it has been designed.. Humanity would have a life beyond all wild imagination. Clear Mind, free from Personality limitation and the bondage of bodily function, makes anything possible. Anything that your heart truly desires, that it. Those three – Body, Heart, Mind – are your Holy Trinity, this actually just came to me.
For me the line of enquiry worked like this… I FELT intuitively the falseness of whatever concept, idea, practice, suggestion was in front of me. This is where my four Fishes come in, they just KNOW somehow… just a feeling without any logical explanation, no sense or reason… then I looked into the matter by thinking it further… then the penny would
drop, and Clarity would enter. No choice of topics, whatever subject the feeling took me into. It was intense beyond anything I’ve known, a wild, all consuming, ‘do or die’ mission. After getting closer and closer, on the precipice of the Brave New World… Jed McKenna’s book kicked it all into one swift action. The blindfold, after two years of torture – fell off. All that’s going to happen now – the deepening of ALL that is.
It’s all maddeningly simple. I am trying to get over this fact. I am eternally grateful.
My one recommendation… below is an extract from McKenna’s book “Spiritually Incorrect Enlightenment”. If there is only one thing you ever read.. it’s this one. He wrote three, not widely known, he doesn’t advertise it, and no one knows who the guy is. At all. Which is a damn good sign to me.
If you came into reading it free from all that took place here on Cool, you’d think what most people think “an arrogant asshole” LOL it’s amazing how fragile egos go into battle to defend own ignorance. But since your guys have seen the battles here, you will be able to know absolute gold. The depth of it is beyond anything I’ve ever known, aside from Puppy.
Find it. Read it. The minute I read this extract – I knew he’s got it, a genuine article. It resonated with me because most of what he writes about – I’ve already processed myself. He just hammered that final nail in my coffin.. before the rebirth, in the same way Puppy took me to demolition ground.
It’s a beautiful clear night sky here tonight.
Enjoy.
__________
“Here’s a simple test. If it’s soothing or comforting, if it makes you feel warm and fuzzy; if it’s about getting into pleasant emotional or mental states; if it’s about peace, love, tranquility, silence or bliss; if it’s about a brighter
future or a better tomorrow; if it makes you feel good about yourself or boosts your self-esteem, tells you you’re okay, tells you everything’s just fine the way it is; if it offers to improve, benefit or elevate you, or if it suggests that someone else is better or above you; if it’s about belief or faith or worship; if it raises or alters consciousness; if it combats stress or deepens relaxation, or if it’s therapeutic or healing, or if it promises happiness or relief from unhappiness, if it’s about any of these or similar things, then it’s not about waking up. Then it’s about living in the dreamstate, not smashing out of it.
On the other hand, if it feels like you’re being skinned alive, if it feels like a prolonged evisceration, if you feel your identity unraveling, if it twists you up physically and drains your health and derails your life, if you feel love dying
inside you, if it seems like death would be better, then it’s probably the process of awakening. That, or a helluva case of gas.”
My wanderings in the halls of Light.
Remember “I, Robot”?.. a very deep concept there – to get the right answer to any issue you need to ask THE RIGHT QUESTION. All questions can be asked. Most will turn out to be nonsensical, because there will be no answer. No-answer question becomes a non issue.
..Does God exist? The question has no answer (we have no way of knowing). A standoff between clerics and atheists becomes a matter of belief on both sides = a lie. Non issue.
..Is there a life after death? Nonsensical, no answer, no way of knowing. Here comes a multitude of beliefs = a lie. Non issue.
..What is the meaning of life? Nonsensical, no answer, because meaning is only found in context. Define the context first (your life, a dog’s life, your mother’s life?). Non issue.
So… What is the right question in the Context of Human Existence (all in Context, remember?)
CAN YOU ACCEPT NOT KNOWING?
We know nothing, and to compensate for this lack of certainty – we blindly believe in anything or turn to science in (blind) belief that it will provide all the answers. Any blind belief in something a third party is peddling – is a lie.
We don’t need all the answers. We need Faith. Faith is belief – in Self-determination, the only type of belief worth having. Self Determination equals Enlightenment, an ability to use own faculties to know Truth.
No Unicorns. Just plain and simple Simplicity.
People follow religeous traditions believing this path will take them to Truth and Enlightenment. Well… they’ve got it backwards, and they don’t question what Enlightenment is and what it is they are after. The truth will shock.
….True nature of Reality is unbelievably harsh, and Enlightenment is not about Light as in pretty glowing fuzzy ball of light. True reality is devoid of love and compassion and emotion, a dark place. There is nothing humane in there. If you have a comfortable life, and the voice of discontent is not too loud – do not seek Truth. There is NOTHING PRETTY about it. At All. I understood that too well now.
If you still want to go there (most likely because Life has you by the throat)…. you don’t become a fish by strapping on fins and hoping it will give you giblets and make you able to swim underwater, i. e. ……………… you don’t meditate, follow any practice, pray, go to church blah blah blah – without UNDERSTANDIG the nature of reality FIRST. Otherwise all you are doing is strapping on the fins.
Those will come in later, AFTER, as a conscious choice. You choose not to be an animal. CONSCIOUSLY. That choice might feel mightily uncomfortable, going against your true nature, most people have no idea what their TRUE nature is.
That choice is what Divnity is all about.
Don’t seek Enlightenment…. Truth hurts.
Hello Ines,
LoL…I am reminded about Pupster´s comment about me not being realistic.
There is beauty in Truth. Actually, its the only beauty around. And our “animal” instinctive natures can be just as divine.
As an example, of natural instinctive natures, maybe perhaps it is not so elegant to be animalistic with a guy. Do you know a man who feels comfortable in accepting a woman who feels like only the truth (between them) can be found during soulful intimate sex, and won´t be fooled around with, because unleashing that energy is extreme? Male lions seem to be fine with it. Male scorpions could have some issues. LoL.
Do women accept a man´s sexual desire? I have heard repeated “bored” women, who complain that all her husband wants, is sex. I have to laugh that the majority of women that complain, never say, “My husband finds me incredibly attractive and always wants to make love to me. ” Most women, abuse this knowledge and try to control – instead of honouring that sacred energy. A lioness looks after her cubs instinctively and is the huntress as well.
Is there a difference our true natures when there is love?
That truth, is very powerful.
Gatubela,
There is no beauty in Truth, only in the fact that you don’t want to live a lie.
Please don’t lump together animal nature and Divinity, this is the sort of thing (use of language) that confuses people into believing that Transcendence, Enlightenment and being Awake are all the same stuff.
Our basic nature is that of a true, wild life animal. True compassion and unconditional love are alien in an animal, humans included. That’s another split in the fabric of Reality. If the opposite were true, we would be selflessly putting the needs of others before our own all the time. The majority of people derive a sense of personal satisfaction from kind deeds, hardly a ‘no reward’ selfless giving… Just ask yourself how many people you know that are able to perform acts of love – anonymously, without a recipient being aware where it comes from. Even more, how many would be able to do that over the course of a lifetime. In the context of human lives true unconditional love – is near non existent. People settle for various degrees of ‘less’… who can blame them.
It’s a Unicorn, Gatubela.
Maternal ‘love’ is no exception. Maternal instinct is not love, to believe that is to fool ourselves. I’ve seen mother alligators being extremely nurturing and tender with the eggs. Would you honestly call it ‘true love’? Look around at relationships that exist between mothers and children. Observe the unconscious game to control the offspring. There is nothing conscious in an instinct.
Puppy’s personal story was not about being honest (which he was). There are deeper layers in it, and sexual obsession is only a surface manifestation of it. It was about Transcendence. Think about it in terms of the “Twilight” movie, can you see the connection?
True love is consciously transcendent, a Spirit, a bond outside of sexual desire (‘outside’ doesn’t mean ‘absence of’). The blend of energy between two people has to be very unique for this to happen. I don’t want to use words like ‘sacred’, ‘eternal’, ‘divine’ in this context, they’ve been marred by pseudo spiritual teachings.
I wonder how you find Truth during soulful intimate sex? What truth is that? Could you be more specific?
The difference is love. Not unicorns. I was not lumping them. I was sharing what it divine for me. It won´t be the same for others Ines.
In spanish, there is a saying…”me nace…” It means, what was born in me to do…or to say…or to act.
If who you are, makes a person react in a certain way, then why continue? If enlightenmnet for you, is not truth…and that truth does not inspire your own beauty, then why continue?
So, in that light, I won´t make mention of Puppy´s comments, if what I said, and who I am, “birthes” those reactions in him, towards me.
Anyways…reward in selfless giving – strange, I was just saying the same thing to my son yesterday. What is born in us to do, is not based on man-made perceptions.
With regards to making love, I just feel the person, that´s all. Like God is there.
Before we can love Life and all in it, we have to SEE it for WHAT IT IS. Or else it’s a fallacy, the same as saying ‘I love this new dress I ordered’, while never having opened the box in which it arrived. A life of an idealist is that of a fool’s paradise which clashes with Reality. It does as much damage as the worst of tyranies – it keeps people enslaved in the bubble, unhappy, discontent and strapped to the past and illusion.
I know what caused those reactions in Puppy, because it’s the same thing that’s causing it in me now. It is not a reaction to a person, but to the lie of what they carry within. I was of the impression that you understand those dynamics? Lie versus Truth, nothing personal.
Gatubela, you have a generous heart, in the same way I have strong psychic body responses, but those are not enough for waking up. You still cannot SEE clearly, and the muddled Mind gives rise to a muddled expression. Your trademark, by the way.
Why continue.. well, you don’t have to I guess….. It just depends on whether you want to learn, want to open the box… which you haven’t done yet.
Truth doesn’t inspire beauty. It inspires Will to transcend. Then it becomes the beauty of us, which is effortless.
Puppy left because he saw that the divide is hard to bridge. It’s the price of being Awake.
Oooops,,there goes that again. I have heard that before from my ex-husaband too…Sag and scorpio rising. And Yes – my son, sag with mercury in scorp in the eighth said that I was not present and that I was a liar. I am getting alot of that lately. I told him that unfortunately, life will not be giving me the easy way out. Getting up at four in the morning to study…and putting in 12 hour working days, in order to look after three cubs…has made me appear like I don´t give a damn. Its the opposite really. Because something makes me motivate myself to do it.
Puppy´s energy is his own, and his own spiritual victory. He will take that with him to his death. I won´t be standing here, claiming the same….nor even interested in it. It is HIM…his beauty….not mine. Only that I do what I must with the limittations I have.
The results of my actions or WHAT I CREATE go over what you are currently defining as my will to transcend. I will give it up at anytime, because transcendence is an external result for me, to be grounded now at my life. Internal combustions to be held in, and what I want sacrificed, all because I have a womb.
Jesus was nothing, until we know about him. But it was HIM on the CROSS, not the rest of us. What I know, has nothing to do, with what I can impact in the live´s of others.
I don´t care about being awake Ines. Not really. It means nothing to me, if I have not done one single thing right in my life. If there is no love. I won´t venture into the “I am an animal” abyss, without understanding that I am only an animal in my interactions with others. If I can get it right, then maybe I can progress. I will prefer to stagnate in that first…That lesson in the occult is very crucial, as you can not call the entire spectrum of energies, nor even the right ones, if you are not aware of the consequences of choice. With regards to the lie…well the universe is the stage for it?
My view won´t be the same as yours, or Puppy´s or anyones.
Its funny that you think I am struggling to love life. But my reality already sucks…that is not changing anytime soon. I can change my inner reality…
If you were to own reality, what would you do with it? Its NOW a TANGIBLE tool in your hands…heart….mind….soul. You are an active participant in it to manifest also in others.
Reality emanating from ….you, radiating to others….while clearly perceiving if they are strong…or vulnerable…or evil.
I just understand that we all create our reality, and that we are ALSO it.
Gatubela, I understand, because like you, I am a parent and know the limitations.. For me it was not a matter of ‘interest’, being a mother meant nothing in there. I allowed myself to fall apart, because I didn’t want to keep falling apart for the rest of my life. At some point it was that or physical death.
Getting interactions with others ‘right’ and ‘having an impact’ will change nothing. It’s the fins I mentioned before. Inner equals Outer.
Something was brought up in me by your reply.
When I was small, my favourite toy was a monkey. With long limbs, soft body and a hard head, thoughtful, but friendly expression in its face. Strangely, it was snow white. A white monkey. I loved it. When I left home for Uni, my mum chucked away all my toys without asking me. That monkey was the only one I wanted back. I went into my mind, and there it was, in one of the caves, alive as ever. I asked ‘What are you doing in here, you don’t exist anymore’. And the monkey said ‘I am immortal. YOU are keeping me alive’.
Well.. I will answer your posts in this one…and also say I don´t perceive that your limitations are the same as mine as a parent.
So, my Sag son is right, I am not present in his life. However, I doubt he can understand what I am tuned into. I would have had to answer him truthfully and say…”Welllllll Saggie, you darn teenager….its your death I am present in.” Huge reality switch. It would scare the shit out of him.
So….oooopsss…I told a tiny lie.
Strangely, his death energy says that he is helpless and needs me, but not to be a smother to him. I listen to it. Its not ego, although it appears as if I am out to lunch and what was the word you mentioned…??? What´s there not to be heartfully generous to? Or to have faith in? I will toss off my clothes and get naked knowing that life and death are working harmoniously. I am happy at that spot…it is soothing and beautiful. Even though for many, it makes them nervous.
So…even though we shoot arrows alot, so much that the house appears like a combat zone…lol..and imagine that my daughter has leo moon and venus in Sag too. (arrows lit with fire, roars….flying all over the dinner table, hahaha)
And my little Paduwan, is a triple aries…mercury, rising and mars, all in that ball of fire, with a moon in Taurus.
Universal reality is not in lovey dovey energy….it does not function on it. But the objectivity through the fact that evilness exists, is what I am getting at. So…through its existence, all souls are loved and to be highly respected. Maybe what we define as love energy, is not really the whole spectrum of what it truly is.
And well…if I were to bang my hand on the table, I would expect my clothes to be taken off and that table would get more interesting by the second.
Being honest is the best time for union…
You would have to tear down all you believed in, all man made bullshit, otherwise – Non existent. MAN MADE. Not real. Again, don’t think about it literally, in terms of physical structures here on earth – towns and villages, metropolitan cities, bridges, satellites, factories, those are real alright.. The bullshit of beliefs is inside libraries, schools, governments, universities, Internet.. seeping into every head. Millions of thoughts generated by bright minds of Humanity, looking for answers to big questions. There is nothing wrong with the search, until it begins to be served as Truth, turns into a dogma, crystallises into an unshakable, unquestioned entity in millions of people.
It was not YOUR SEARCH. Not YOURS. Why are you so readily accepting something proclaimed by men and women who’ve been dead for centuries? That’s what’s called ‘looking for answers in the Outer’, it’s not simply about filling the inner hole with physical form like relationships, things, careers.. Belief systems are generated within, by taking on everything from outside, without passing it through the inner filter..
Everything is disjoined, a total separation, there is a lack of cohesion in the world. It bloody needs it!!! Because it IS IT!!! There is nothing wrong with science – but it deals with minutae parts of Reality, without integrating those efficiently into the bigger picture. There is nothing wrong with religion, if it could operate on a few basic principles, one of those ‘All starts with YOU’. There is nothing wrong with philosophy, as long as it is understood for what it is – the playground of the Mind.
Not Truth. Not Dogma. People don’t know how to use their own Minds, are not taught to QUESTION all around, afraid to think and feel for themselves.. They are reared like cattle, for mindless unaware existence AND THE BENEFIT OF A FEW. Those who have even an approximate understanding – either go to the Dark side and take full advantage of the sheep for lack of conscience, or withdraw from the world, because their conscience doesn’t allow them to participate in the game.
‘Lack of conscience’ is left to rule the world.
It truly is an illusion, but of such massive proportions there is no escape from it. Religions and philosophies either propagate non resistence (lChristianity), or inner withdrawal (Buddhism). Turn the other cheek, huh? Inner peace and serenity? All very noble… untill you are in the streets, and someone is attempting to smash your head with a piece of corrigated iron. Although.. the Buddha was realistic in seeing that things cannot be changed from outside, the sound of weapons is pretty loud, yes? He went to starting within. Except.. no one went on to explain how and why this difference came about. So people keep on struggling with the ‘serenity’ bit, when everything in their lives is anything, but. A lie.
Animals who were given an ability to CREATE. So they’ve created an ugly upscaled version – of an animal world. An animal Farm. Animals who don’t know they have a choice. The Mind asleep, the Heart shut, The Body – on a rampage. The Holy Trinity of Humanity.
There is nothing ‘mystical’, other worldly in Awakening, and no elevated, out of body experience will take you there. It’s about seeing Truth, in everything around, from your own relationships to those of people and organisations to the entirity of this world and beyond. Want to levitate?…. You’ll come down with a thud.
Don’t have to watch all, a few seconds will surffice. Gives an idea.
Apparently, a male rabbit is a buck or a jack. Is that where ‘jacking off’ comes from?
youtube.com/watch?v=j9IJTO8LizQ
So Scorpio men… inside each one of them lives an inherent understanding of the world as is. They are acutely atuned to the Justice aspect of it. Degrees of Awareness will be widely different, from total assholes who cannot see own Wisdom and only display brief glimpses of it.. to those Eagles at the top.
There is a side to the man I’m seeing that I don’t like. Selfishness. While he says I am a giving woman with a heart – it doesn’t translate into the same action in him, although he has a heart all right… He was given the specifics.. He knows.
We sit in the kitchen talking, he starts pushing the subject.. I slam my hand on the worktop and say loud ‘You cannot come here and take all the time’. He is shocked, starts something in his defence, then gets up and begins to collect his things together. I watch. I know he doesn’t want to go, and will NOT go. He sits down, pissed off and fuming, BUT… he also knows what I said was true. That’s WHY he sat down. I look at him and say ‘Don’t sulk please’. He looks at me, I look at him.. I can’t hide the smile, simply because it’s funny to observe the whole thing.. we both burst out laughing.
The whole business of this relationship (which I don’t call as such for myself, but here we are, it needs some name) has gotten under his skin deeper than he dares to admit. He is in control of the externals, but I see the undercurrents. There are sides to him he doesn’t want me to see, yet, he also intuits that I DO see them. It makes him feel vulnerable. That he
feels lonely, despite having masses of friends and being popular… That he is tired of having a life of mediocracy, although he is doing the best he can.. That he wants to attach himself to something that has a meaning, and right now I represent that.. That he is becoming enslaved by the intensity of love making.. That he never asked himself who he is outside of it all.
He started to lie, little nonsensical lies. Such as texting me at half five in the morning, followed by seven, ten minute gap calls and leaving a message, none of which I respond to (I treasure my sleep). I asked later what it was about. He said he just got up early and decided to call. I know it’s not true, and I know what IS true. He has entered a state of vulnerability as far as this relationship goes.
I bring this up again a day later by saying ‘Something doesn’t add up.’ He gives me the same story. I say quietly ‘You were up all night, weren’t you?’ He is startled ‘Yes, I had some friends over’. I say ‘They left, and you felt lonely’. He pauses, then says ‘I wanted to come over and just sleep, do nothing, but sleep in your bed’. We don’t discuss it further, I am just grateful he was man enough to admit this.
The song comes up, ‘Land down under’. He gives a short laugh and sings ‘I met a strange lady, she made me nervous’, while the word ‘Puppy’ flashes through my head. I tell him that I would have to love him and leave him. He asks when. I say ‘When the time is right’. Notice that he doesn’t ask ‘why’. Scorpio guys are very intuitive, he feels the ‘why’, without
explanation. He stopped joking ‘Get down to my level’ for a while now.
There is a strange quality to Scorpio/Pisces relationships. It’s tingled with a sense of… inevitability.
I want him to detach from the whole thing, because I don’t see a free man, but I don’t tell him that. He will simply not get what it means to be one. Detachment comes as part of the deal with Awakening. Don’t have to consciously cultivate it, just happens. You feel, but don’t emote. You observe, but don’t get emotionally embroiled.
The price of true Awakening is aloneness, and it’s prize – Infinity.
“Reality emanating from ….you, radiating to others…”
You are using the word ‘reality’ here as in ‘your life’, not in the context of universal Reality (which is exactly the same for all of us, no exception)..
Riiiighhhttt.. let’s look at the VERY basics. What motivates you in this life? What is it? It’s rather simple…YOU as an individual organism – want to live. It’s the root of all the selfishness in the world. If we can face this fact FIRST, unclouded by all the concepts of ‘goodness’ and ‘charity’, it makes the journey a bit easier. Remember Maslow? Food and shelter – first.
Forget about the cast off robes of man made Ego Identities, those are the easiest to burn. What no one tells you (or maybe, they do, I have little patience for known formal spiritual teachings) – you will face the primary Ego of you, at the level of instinct, oh it’s a tricky thing… Forget about agape for a minute, detach from it. YOU WANT TO LIVE, no matter how much life sucks, no matter how much suffering you witness.
Yet.. people have been known for great acts of self sacrifice. Again, be clear about that.. most of those have been conducted out of some instilled ‘belief’ (die for your country) or instinct (maternal love).
You said once ‘all souls should be loved’… didn’t ring true to me. Universal love in the form proselytized out there – doesn’t exist, impossible in that context. What IS possible is plain respect for the fact that your soul has as much validity and right to exist as mine.There is nothing separating us in that right, nothing which divides anything into ‘good’ and ‘bad’.. empathy and compassion come from this respect This is a nature of ‘impersonal love’, although I wouldn’t define it as love in its true sense.
So.. what IS love? It’s an ability to treat another organism (any organism) as if it is – YOUR ORGANISM. As if it is – YOU. As if it’s survival takes priority. An absolute and CONSCIOUS negation of Primary Ego in favour of another organism, up to the point of physical death.
That’s why it’s so rare. The Primary Ego wants to live. That’s why Discernment is so important. Jesus didn’t die for love of Humanity as a whole or for love, for that matter.. He died – for being true to his inner Principle, that of not being a lie. The principle of ‘All begins with you, and any external authority is false’.. which the external authority punished him for. The Principle, not love, beats Primary Ego with a stick, annihilates it.
Here is another paradox… No-Self doesn’t know about existence of Primary Ego and so is not afraid of Death. You know.. like a dog who doesn’t posess Self Awareness.. In human beings true No-Self is also a lie. We are aware of our mortality and Will to live. Self (awareness of own existence) never dies, unless you lose your Mind, literally. Try to decapitate your Primary Ego Self by not facing the fact of its NATURAL existence – and face an ultimate defeat. Try to accept it – and things will begin to look on the bright side.
There… I’ve now killed McKenna as well.
Love…is a force and not an ideal. Its energy…like feeling heat. Energetic. A force of nature. You state only the relative difference of love compared to your current state but not in the totality of that energy. Heat can be used to create fire. And love creates….????
That perspective is yours only and relative to your growth. That means that you won´t feel it “beyond” you at all.
I had a strange dream – a gun was placed on my forehead and I was shot. In the dream, I felt the bullet in my brain…I knew that I had died. But what also came out, is that there was no change in how I am now and that state of death. My life and how I strive to live it…is as I strive to die. One and the Same.
Now…just because I felt it, does it mean that it really happened? No…not at all.
It depends on what you perceive as the totality of your complete self. You just don´t see “you” as an energetic being.
If you were to see yourself as a pisces – you would manifest “pisces”. Under your own logic, you would loose the idea of what pisces is, and just “be”.
Words disappear…as you dissolve into that energy. The mind disappears…
Its not death we fear…but dying a terrible death. Its not survival that we are fighting against, but the fear of “living” through its consequences. Really…its life that you are talking about, and not death. Can you connect to your ENERGY and perceive its physical manifestation here on earth and how that is?
Survival…what is it really? Everyday I feel is my last on earth…the last time I can say something…talk to someone…be in someone{s life. It goes beyond my pride…my fear…my hopes..my ambitions. I can assure you, that when you have that concept in you…survival is not just minimized into rationalizing the existence of “no-self” and killing “Mackenna´s”…
True Love creates death, Gatubela. Of ‘you’ as you’ve known it. It’s like ploughing a field turning every layer of Selfhood, examining it and destroying it… not what we understand as neccessity for Love creation. It doesn’t come with rose glasses either. So yes, it’s scary.
Feeling combined with thought creates emotion. The most primitive, volatile Force which drives all humans. After falling into the abyss of Nothing-ness I’ve discovered my ability for clear thinking, as JoJo discovered her ability to feel. Clear vision unobstructed by the surge of hormones, the animal abdicated all responsibility to use the tool (Mind), outside of infantile emotional drives. When either faculty (intuition or reason) is dominated by the other – the circle is broken, and The Whole
fades.
I’ve taken my head out of my arse. NOTHING remains. No thing. Body and MInd are One. Nothing exists outside of your Consciousnes, and everything exists outside of it.
Everything is relative by mortal standards, only because Lie is complex. The multiplicity of ‘rules’, ‘morals’ ‘terms of engagement’ reflects this complexity. If you zoom out beyond the earth plane – you see the simplicity of Absolute.. There is no love, no joy, no pain there. It’s name is Oblivion. It changes the meaning of Life, Love and Death.
So.. thanks for trying to shackle me to your idea of ‘manifesting Pisces’, without seeing what it MEANS. And remember.. I’m Gemini Rising. The Third Eye. Although in all honesty.. none of it matters.
Instead of ‘pinning’ me for my ‘rationality’… it would help to enquire within what exactly you’ve been trying to burn here in the past five years. The word ‘think’ is not a curse. I respect Puppy’s path, but I can assure you he had to thorougly engage his mental faculties BEFORE he arrived at where he is now. NOTHING GOES PAST THE MIND, even the incineration itself. From there on you begin to see and feel bigger patterns and signs.
It’s exactly two years since I posted here. I was tortured by ONE question when I came in.. “what’s the meaning of it all?” I cannot even begin to think just how PERFECT it has been. There is an order to how Universe functions, the Perfect Flow. None of it is incidental. Tap into that, here is your Piscean energy. It does not control – anything.
Be well.
We are talking about P.Puppy again? I said I would not…
I am not trying to burn anything…as I have mentioned, I live my life, like each day may be my last. I don´t expect you to live the same, but it sure means that we are communicating on a different point of view.
I was trying to communicate the following…no shackling at all…again, completely misunderstood. It is only an example of “beyond” the imagination.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ql42nqoomE
Half the things you see in this video, are not fully understood. Why is he doing the things he does…wiggling the fingers…moving like that…
Qi gong is 100% imagination, with a very TANGIBLE result. Its rational, scientific…but 100% imagination. Some Qi gong masters have electricity zinging out of their hands…as seen when they touch their patients and cause the muscles to twitch.
Again…only an example!!!
So yes, piscean energy can be controlled and does control. The world is not falling apart, is it? “Oblivion” exists for you, does it not? Why are you so damn contradictory?
You should try to balance a balloon near your third eye. Blow one up and do it… Contained air…See how hard it is to balance it? I have done it, so I do know how it feels.
For me, among other emotions, it was humbling..knowing that even simple things require such an effort and what kind of “mind” I needed in order to do it. Balance needed the earth to move…and earth in chinese medicine is the only element that can be transformed.
“The Absolute”…..
Well…if you are seeing that, then I have to congratulate you. It means unsaid volumes of spiritual work.
You are definitely the master of your fate here…infinite realities, spririts, elementals, angels and demons come to you and request your cooperation through your capacity to channel.
It means that you have gone beyond the energy of harmony through conflict, to perceive an organized structure.
My blessings.
Thank you, Gatubela
In the past few days I had things coming to me which defy all logic, go beyond mere coincidences. We are masters of our fate when we are OPEN to everything that unfolds, when we follow the path with no doubt and hesitation, with integrity and faith in own ability to face EVERYTHING and affect Life. People do begin to take notice, it’s like a magnet.
If I could share with you a fraction of life energy and vitality that the Absolute bestows on us.. it has a great sense of humour too:))))))) Once seen – the Mind… just is. Doesn’t fight anymore, nor it is exhaulted, JUST IS.
you say ‘unsaid volumes of spiritual work’.. look at a million posts I’ve made LOL It was ALL for a reason. All of it was my work, and lots besides. I am happy I never gave up.. as a friend of mine said ‘You always go all the way, until you get to the bottom line’.
My blessings to you too.
youtube.com/watch?v=jcuI9i3df7o
In the end of the day you realise.. that there was nothing to realise. How weird is that? That you are and be, that any second you may be no more, that millions of bright and not so bright minds treaded the same waters and arrived (or not) at the same place. This particular thought makes me giggle:) Just feels so hillariously dumb to share the joy of reinventing the wheel with the rest of Humanity.. That any search for ‘meaningful’ answers is totally futile, because the questions don’t matter one bit, and in looking for those answers – you are wasting your prescious life.. that ‘you’ is everything, because nothing exists outside of ‘you’.. and that ‘you’ is nothing, because Life lives through you and makes ‘you’ nothing in the grand scheme of things.. that life has a meaning when we give it meaning, and outside of it – it matters naught. that emotions are what makes the human ‘Self’, by attaching to memories, we (Self) are nothing but our memories, comprised of thought and feeling, entwined together in an emotional holocaust… that Pure Consciousness is not a magical external entity, it means exactly what is says on the tin: direct Perception, clear Intuition and pure Reason OF YOURS, uncluttered by emotion.. that you’ve abandoned your sense of Being-ness and inner Wisdom somewhere in your mid twenties and that cut off the supply of oxigen to Life.. That both atheists and theologians are missing the point by not asking the right question… that science and religion touch upon different part of the elephant and it’s still an elephant, regardless of the paradigm in which it’s explored.. That human thought is a tool for finding solutions, and when not used in the way it was intended – is the most destructive, vendictive enemy.. That a cup of good coffee and a sound of rain are worth more to you than any riches of the world.. and that you are pretty content in letting the rest of the world go to hell, because there is no hell or heaven… that all is in passing.. including pain and pleasure of Being, and the smallest of things have the most significance. That if anything else is coming into your Consciousness – it will do so on its own accord, without asking for your persmission, like it hasn’t asked up to now… that you’ve abandoned the world, and in doing so, you’ve gained back the Life in its full splendor.
There is absolutely NOTHING to realise.That’s the silliest thing about it. And so you give up all thinking, all contemplating and just get flown by what occurs.. by what arises within.. how it was when you were small and didn’t have a clue how and why you got into this strange world, what you were doing in here and couldn’t quite figure out how it functioned and didn’t really care.
And I just marvel at the way the Universe works.. I came here at the beginning of an existential crisis, on a completely unrelated subject, and look where it took me.. through centuries of human experience and perspective of thousands of people, mystical experiences, deep thinking and intense feelings.. what a journey!!
Go have a cup of coffee.. a day without pain is a day well lived. A day when you enjoyed something you love is a day well lived.. a day when you were given a kiss without any expectation is a day well lived.. a day when you got soaked wet in a downpour of rain is a day well lived… a day when you put a smile on someone’s face is a day well lived.. Ah phuck.. just go live it, enjoy the show. There is nothing more to it.
I’m done.
You remind me of scorpionic fixity. Like, its all “no” energy.
Its hard to move in all of that, if you don´t understand that you are energetic and that there are ways to work with energy.
Thats something to realize…because you have to apply it.
For those of you who have not understood the miracle of the inner-child, I wish to share this movie with you. The power of love through incredibly brave intimacy, defeating circumstantial limitations and doubts built by ego of the parents. Then, a breaking down and dissolving fears of that parental ego conditioning.
The woman who transforms Helen Keller’s universe is the Highest, most divine expression of integrity and bravery to me- via the Aries archetype. If I met an Aries soul as old and as profound as this woman’s commitment to grow together, and with this amazing heart courage –> I’d fall to my knees in reverence.
This movie is very occult to me, I expresses such beauty and strength in what is possible in terms of evolution of the soul.
‘The Miracle Worker’
This movie is much clearer to watch on Youtube.;)
Search — ‘The Miracle Worker’
(a Disney motion picture)
Here is an interesting song, for those who surf the abyss.
youtube.com/watch?v=PHTSRA1RrSs&list=RDt76wweTttwA
Or you can search for “Breaking Benjamin” Evil Angel, in youtube.
For me, it is the expression of the duality of the energy perceived as “evil” as the one and the same energy, before the heart is open, and after.
The man in this song, has the need for the evil angel to open her wings, through surrender. That plea feels so eternal for me…it resonates through the ages…brings me to my knees and calls to me like a man calling for a lost energy unknown in this earth.
I feel that scorpio is the true owner of this energy through knowing mystical truthes and what love really is. But pisces is also present.
It was written and performed by a Piscean.
Simplify, Gatubela. Every energy is available to us, all within and all united. Access them each moment, the being will prompt every time. The power of the Absolute is permanent and unchangable, the energy of Forever. It will remain so in a bilion years. No human culture, invention, thought can affect it or change it to suit their agenda.
When I was 19 and homeless for a few months, for some inexplicable reason I carried around a shoulder bag and… Charles Darwin ‘Origin of Spieces’. It was a big format book, and I used it as a pillow. Must confess never read it completely.. but the symbolism of this simple act is haunting.
It’s not God who created Man in his image, MAN created God in its own image. Mind made crutches. I’ve come the full circle, sentient and sapient Being, as I stated way back.. It’s all lies. I am not an Atheist, I don’t believe God does not exist. I KNOW God does not exist. Universe doesn’t need a cause for Existence, man’s mind attempts to ’cause and effect’ everything. It only applies to human world. Creation has no cause, it simply IS. The Brahman is forever. I’m with the Buddha on that one.
There is no ‘you’ as some fantastically unique entity. There isn’t a SINGLE THOUGHT OR EMOTION in you that hasn’t been felt or thought by most other humans. There is nothing you created or believed that hasn’t been already done in some shape or form… You are a unique combination of cells, a never to be replicated miracle, and yet – we are exactly the same. And the worms really don’t care which body they got today for breakfast: you or Ghandi or Salvator Dali. Blah. mental and emotional entanglements. The body functioned on its own, pumped oxygen into your brain, moved your limbs… supported the fairytale of the Mind bubble. Your life has never been yours to begin with, it has not been GIVEN to you, because ‘you’ as you know it – has never inhabited this vessel in the first place. ‘You’ don’t exist.
Nature is both cruel and… kind. In those last moments it will flood your mind with endorphines, to make the passage easier. You WILL die in peace, have no fear. The question is… knowing all that.. can you LIVE in peace? Yes. Nirvana is REAL, a result of liberation from lies.. just feel it, how many lies people tell themselves, yet, they bloody KNOW the truth deep down, and this constant fight to maintain the illusion of own beliefs, to hold on to the untrue, so much energy and grief is expended, it’s UNBELIEVABLE!!! How much is FREED, how everything looks so different and even the ugly has beauty in it. Unity is REAL. Makes you appreciate every breath, what’s there not to love when your entity and that of others disintegrates right before your eyes every second of living, all is turning into ash.. People don’t love from Blindness and Darkness, they grasp from that, from fear. Love is from Light and Vision only, and it’s REAL.
This body was born INTO Experience. Experience never lies, because it simply IS. One comes of another, morphs and changes and shapes into something unpredictable, messy and beautifully beyond grasp:)
youtube.com/watch?v=hXK5kgiUyFo
You have your piscean “its so obvious” perspective…you must live and breath these things.
In my case, it fills me with love, to be able to understand these things. I am not by nature a Pisces person.
LoL…Just let me be amazed by it all. Its not obvious for me…it took me alot of sweat and tears to be able to feel what you do, naturally.
And in those last moments, there are no endorphins….not really. People are very honest and fearful. Their pains, regrets surface. Its a very human state – which is like saying goodbye. They stay like that for many days after death too. They suffer. There are important truthes in death. No one is more honest and sincere, as they shed their material attachments.
A child cries for its mother…a man feels regret over a lost love…old people feel their solitude…or they remember a time in their life when they felt love….some people identify with a particular age when they were active and vibrant. When they die, they take that form. I have not met many dead people, who died happily. The worst are torture victims…whose bodies were abandoned.
You are being contradictory again by saying that people don´t love from darkness and blindness. There is no deeper, passionate and profound love.
Its love beyond being comfortable.
Awwwww.. Gatubela, like you are feeling the ‘not so obvious’ – I’m amazed at my discovery of the muscle I never knew I had. I don’t get attached to it. I know I sound like a ‘know it all’. I don’t, I am really just nothing. I could write tons on this and that, but it means nothing in the context of Life. It means absolutely nothing when there is no honesty and sincerity in how we are out there. It means nothing when there is no love. I know I have the brain and will never be a completely thoughtless fluffy bimbo. But from where I am now – it’s disintegrating fast, in a sense that I don’t feel I need intellect to BE. Which is strange considering how I’ve entered this state – from Mind Realisation.
And I struggled in the past with meanings, very personal to you that you assign to words.. and I’m not as mystically inclined as you are, even though I have an interest, but no belief in those things. But I always FELT just how genuine you are, even in times of misunderstandings. So thank you for being who you are, for being genuine. By now I’ve observed people online who claim to have become ‘truth realised’.. and they lie, because that rational truth realisation hasn’t opened their hearts. Instead they simply put on new robes of spiritualised Ego, but their actions contrast all they profess to know. I smell their fear miles away, hiding behind newly adopted dogmas; it becomes a new wall, a new banner of righteoussness.. Men especially do that, women are much more open, even when they arrived at that same point.
Like you I’ve always had this belief in the inherent integrity of people, I know now it’s not the case at all. I want to stay open. If there is something I don’t want to hear and reject it outright – I’ve missed the point, I’m closed off, and that’s the plague, the virus. And the point is – everything should remain open to scrutiny, including this Entity typing here.. and Mindfullness is not an empty expression… I take baby steps from that one point of Big Bang to embody all that I see.
I’ve just been feeling so vulnerable recently, it’s as if my DNA is disintegrating, and then there is a renewed sense of life, and there is freedom, but also questions of directions, and I re-evaluate all my human connections, those are both more AND less meaningful, it’s a paradox, like everything with this…… It’s pretty humbling. Maybe it doesn’t come across as such in the way I write, but perhaps, by now you’ve gotten used to the brash style.
Hi there,
I hope this discussion is still up and running because I really need your advice.
I met this Scorpio guy almost two months ago. Noticed him on a plane and approached him first by sending him a little note. A few messages later I left him my number and he got in touch with me the next day. It started as an easy and fun texting, then developed into more intense conversations, flirting and skype chats ( he lives in different city ). Everything seemed to be going so damn well, he would sent me “Good morning”\”Hugs&Kisses” texts, always share with me what we was up to and seem very sincere and interested. Insanely flirtatious and sexy. A couple of times he mentioned I was a “rare find” which made him be careful about me because it was too good to be true. Once I went on a business trip and was out of reach for two days he texted he missed me and even woke up in the middle of the night to send me “welcome back” message when I finally got back home. He invited me to come visit him over the weekend. I didn’t rush but we set the date and both were really looking forward to it. He sent me texts trying to figure out what we can do once I arrive or what he will cook for me and etc. He did say he was really eager to see me. Then all of a sudden everything’s changed. He went on a business trip for a few days, didn’t keep in touch for a day then reappered only to let me know he was a lil drunk. Once he returned I felt there was something wrong. He texted less, seemed to be very distracted and we didn’t skype for a while. Then he kept silent for a day and when finally replied I asked if he still wants me to come visit him? His answer was like “I’m sorry, I’m misbehaving for no reason. Didn’t expect myself to act like this. I didn’t disappear, a lot of stuff going on all at once”. I asked to let me know when he gets through everything that bothers him. It took 2 days, he announced he’s coming to visit me himself. Altough it was a business trip I was glad we will finally meet each other in person. We did and I wasn’t disappointed. We had a proper date, went to a restaurant, he took me to the movies later, hold my hand for the very first time and kissed. Felt perfect. By the look on his face I could tell he was happy and he mentioned he was glad he came. The same day he asked if it’s appropriate if he spends the night at my appartment, I didn’t hesitate though set a few boundaries not wanting to rush things. It was a perfect night with a movie, christmas tree decorations and a lot of cuddle on a couch. We slept in separate beds which was totally fine for me but it also made me question why he didn’t insist on sleeping with me ?! The morning after he cooked breakfast, cleaned dishes, kissed me on the lips and promised to hang out with me later after his business meeting. It never happened. He stayed over at his friend’s house which I didn’t complain about. But his flight back home was the next evening and he texted me he would see me before he leaves. He never did. Not even said goodbye. I texted him 1 hour before his departure, just a random “Bye, Bye” and he weirdly replied “Sorry, some family issues. Will be happy to tell you everything’s fine soon”. That’s it. He came back home, we texted a few times about nothing. It was the first time I ever initiated conversation with him, he kindly replied but something was lacking. Now it’s been 3 days of no connection ( I don’t text ) and I wonder what’s happening and what about to happen? Is he disappointed, not that into me or he needs some time and space to figure it all out? I really am into him, never felt like this before but the situation is driving me crazy (
Hi Brooke,
There is no ‘situation’. He has issues that need addressing in his life, and his attention is on those. You should commend him for his consideration of you as a woman and not dragging you to bed. It means respect. But also.. ‘the perfect date’ probably missed the sizzling chemistry for him. These guys KNOW when it’s something they want to investigate further. When they do – nothing will stop them from doing just that.
I had my guy come around when I was away for two weeks and spending 20 minutes outside my front door, because he mixed the dates of my return.. until he text me asking when I was back and wanting to arrange a meeting. He is also Scorpio Rising and Cancer Moon, plenty of action once the beast is out. But it took him A YEAR of observation to approach me.
You seem to have a fairytale, movie like version of what is ‘perfect’. Perhaps, you can drop it right here right now, because NOTHING will be along the lines you are anticipating, his way of seeing is different. Tear up the book, honestly. What is that all about ‘I really am into him, never felt like this before’? I mean.. you hardly know the guy, two months, huh.. What are you ‘into’, really?
My advice… he knows you are interested. Let him decide if he wants to have another look:) Be prepared for the fact he may never do. It has NOTHING to do with you being less of a woman, I hope you know that. What will happen? Who knows.. whatever happens is whatever is meant to happen.. or not. Hold this thought in your heart and mind and let go of the rest, of any expectations you have, you seem to have plenty.
As a side note… if the man I am seeing was texting/contacting me EVERY DAY.. if every text or call needed an answer.. it would make me run for the hills, and the same applies to him.
Release it out to Universe, see what comes back. All my best to you.
Dear Ness,
I do appreciate your feedback. Such a relief. Feels like you see me through. I should really switch my mind off to something that will keep me preoccupied and see where life takes me. I know the theory well but practice is sooo not my thing!
I know it’s been 2 months which is not enough to build something strong and trustful but it’s the very first time I felt such mental and emotional connection with a man. And I felt it was very mutual until now.
I admit I was quite shy around him on our date because it was out first actual meeting and I tried to be careful. And I do respect his decision not to take things further otherwise I would feel really pathetic now. Though you’re absolutely right saying if he had sparks he would not be so modest.
Or who knows )
I can sense his previous romances were quite hurtful for him because he mentioned a few times that “all women want is to sleep with other men” or “they’re sexually spoiled and raunchy”. He seems to be so damn independent and comfortable being single and unattached seriously pursuing his career.
So I guess I will wait for him for a while and see what might happen. Or might not.
Thank you!
Hello Brooke,
Intimacy is not an easy thing to convey…and harder to manifest
The brush of two bodies leaving you breathless…
A look that blows your mind away…
An action that sent sparks flying…
And you never even touched him. Such sensual sensitivities can be almost painful.
Do you understand the concept of throwing things to the universe? Not your will be done but that of the Lord or Source? So easy for Ines to write with that piscean what ever it is. When I read it, my heart went out to you. You might have read it, and looked at it in a very superficial way. But this kind of love is beyond yourself.
Release it into the universe when dealing with a man´s energies,requires that you align his energies IN YOU – with God, through surrender. Not with your own value system. I do not know if it can be done on a subjective level, without a knowledge of more deeper occult mysteries.
Under this perspective, there is no such thing as feeling pathetic if you gave yourself to him, because you are in tune with something beyond how you define “what pathetic is.”
I hate how society ruins beautiful sacred energies and we believe it.
With regards to your situation, I feel that you should stop playing games.
Dear Gatubela,
I do appreciate your comments and believe me I desperately try to make this “Universe” thing work for me because it’s the only way I can control my overwhelming emotions and get over this situation.
In fact we have touched, kissed and embraced. And for my Aqua nature it felt incredibly intimate and good. I felt “at home” when I was in his arms without even pushing our intimacy level further. Though I admit I wished it would progress to something. But knowing the afterstory ( him leaving and not getting in touch with me ever since ) I am glad we never got closer because I would definately love that moment and it would be tough for me to get over it without any explanation from his side.
I swear I’m not playing games. Frankly speaking it’s the very first time I let things happen without any tricks in mind, just went with the flow, my intuition.
I read one of his blogposts from 5 years ago where he claimed he would never admit to himself about falling in love with someone and he would rather run away because of it. I don’t know if this is what’s happening at the moment or he’s just no longer interested.
He seemed to be so damn straight-forward and open in speaking his mind so I thought that in case of some uncertainty or final decision he would share it with me but here I am waiting for someone who might never come back for reasons unclear. I read a lot about Scorpio’s dissapearing acts and I wish I could count such behavious as his star sign influence. But he appears to be online on Facebook and Whatsup, he obviously can give some of his time to other people but me. I hate to be left out of his life without even stepping into it, I’m stuck right inbetween its front doors not knowing should I leave or come in? …
Hello Brooke,
Not playing games is a silent language Brooke. Its all “VERB” and action. Very much like putting your money where your mouth is, or walking the walk and not talking the talk. You stand alone on your decisions.
So…if you intensely desire him (thank you scorpio for showing me how that feels) then….???
You either take your clothes off, (and his because you are so turned on…lol) or be honest with him about who you are. ….REALLY want ALL of him. And that means you have to know him and yourself.
Scorpio are bossy in the universe. While you are leaving it to God, (external) Scorpio just may decide to “BE” God. (internal)
Its always death Brooke.
Leave all illusion and lies about yourself and if you feel it, after all of that, intensely and sincerely, come in ….
…naked and vulnerable…
Gatubela, you have an idealistic view of Scorpio energy… like any energy it’s both beautiful AND ugly. Loving and total vulnerability can be manipulated, or thrown back in your face. ‘Feeling pathetic’ is a legitimate concern. Don’t believe when they say they don’t want drama, because subconsciously – they feed off it. The difference is – they want drama ON THEIR TERMs and UNDER THEIR CONSTRUCTION, not a drama created by a woman. The key word is Control. Always, beyond and over anything else. This purgatory of a purging process is what creates the bond.. The feeling of pain ties you to the person beyond every other imaginable emotion. Why do you think Internet is full of Scorpio confused women who went through pain and torture, YET still want them? People never forget pain.
And frankly.. putting up with all the crap that these guys are capable of.. is a big mistake. A woman HAS to be absolutely clear on where she chooses to stand with a Scorpio guy.. or else he will tear her to pieces. The truth is that communication and Scorpio men simply don’t go together. It’s crap, with each one of them. Open and straight forward about speaking his mind? Lol, Mind, yes. Not his innermost feelings.
If you could live in my body for a day or two – you would understand that seeing the ‘not so obvious’ – is dangerous to these men. For some weird reason they just can’t get their heads around the fact that seeing what’s REAL (The good, the bad and the ugly) does not make a woman reject him. And the camouflage they wear – can be easily seen. And they can’t communicate UNTIL they feel they are about to lose you. The bond of pain again.. per aspera ad astra.
I refuse to participate in the game. And good luck to you with being naked. Like a sitting duck. Honest, yes. Naked, no.
As for intensity.. do women really need a Scorpio man to be able to feel it? Why? For me personally.. I am yet to meet one who would match mine, and a totally absorbing emotional/feeling experience with a Scorpio man fails in sensual understanding of a female body.. or perhaps I know too much about it, after all I had years with a Taurean man, and that’s a treat.
I want to add something to the issue of control as people misunderstand what it represents. It’s control over own destiny, over own course of life, NOT over you. It’s best if you have a similar set of mind. Often it’s perceived to be ‘my way or highway’, when the energies of two people are out of sync, when they wish not the best for each other, but the best for themselves. One of the most beautiful things that come from a Scorpio – is his genuine desire for you to progress in ways which
enhance your life, Pisceans too love to see their partners blossom. When I offered to do something for the guy way back.. something which would solve lots of his current dilemmas – he was taken aback, said ‘You would really do this for me?’ I said ‘Fuck the system, you deserve better, why not’.. by the same token, I may be leaving to live and work in Sri Lanka in January, and when I told him, his reaction was ‘You are going to love it there, it’s your kind of place completely’. My 9th house Venus feels home is the entire world, and beauty is found in far away places:)
So.. control.. who can control ANYONE? It’s an illusion that people play with in their heads. What are we, but Life itself?. He doesn’t want control per se. He wants to master his own life, and if that’s not what you want, both for yourself and him – you better move on.
For that alone, for these guys’ wish for you to thrive – I can forgive the not so attractive parts, which for me is the emotional clumsiness. It’s both maddening and cute. And the crap.. well, don’t second guess, don’t participate in crap production, and the factory will shut down.
For all their crazy idiocincracies… they are honest to themselves, the highest degree of spirituality is just that – a fearless faithfulness to own spirit.
She will be clear on where she stands, once she looses illusion. Why not let her get to know herself on a clean slate instead of talking about pointless nothings that were not really intended to help her?
I know a Japanese saying…
“Its better to have people fear you, because they will serve instead of have people love you, because they will abuse.”
I have to wonder if there exists a state of “love”, that does not abuse. The answer to not having the demons come…
Who is ‘her’, Gatubela? My last post wasn’t addressed to anyone in particular, or else I’d put a name in front of it.
You know.. I am really grateful to have a genuine friendship with a man which has absolutely nothing, NOTHING, to do with games, money, sex, material possessions, age, cultural background, education and all other crap that usually comes in. This is the most important thing for me.. it’s free and mutual and is there whichever way life is going to go, regardless of respective paths. It’s a beautiful feeling, Gatubela, and it’s not ‘nothing’ to me, not at all.
There IS love which does not abuse. There is, Gatubela, please believe that.
I was responding to your post 2088. I misunderstood that you were not exactly responding to Brooke. Its the fact that the forum loads very slowly and posting is getting hard.
I am glad that you found such a friendship.
I will explain a bit about that post.
I was not idealizing scorpionic energy at all. The negative aspects of the SAME energy, would strike fear in us. You really would have to have the occult knowledge in you, in order to handle this fear. This knowledge would be knowledge of the soul, of which the negative aspects of scorpionic energy respond to.
How you communicate it, you feeling vulnerable works on the line of fear without demonstrating this occult knowledge. It goes beyond society and “you”. This is the underlying tone of your post.
Our fights REALLY at the level of the Source, are elemental. But I can´t say to scorpio´s negative side “fire!!!” or “feel me”. In order to feel me, I will have to get vulnerable. The solution is love and its gifts.
You would either have to bond – or have sex, in order to communicate this. The energies exchange. Not having this is suffering. So yes, its death. Ego ties to bonding become lost on all levels.
Bonding becomes the only reality.
Feeling pathetic is ego Ines.
I know I am not so good at explaining.
Help….
Here is my story
I’m a cusp leo/virgo (August 22nd 1986 born 3:56am) though feel far more virgo at times than leo.
He is a double scorpio (Oct 24, 1990 birth time unknown). The epitome of a scorpio. Passionate, loving, devoted, manipulative, jealous, possessive. He embraces his scorpion state of being with complete abandon, he plays into it fully.
How we started…
We met on an online game we both loved playing and I was very wary of him at first because of his lifestyle. While he does have a steady job, he also had a binge drinking problem that raised red flags for me and was very obnoxious at times when drinking.
He came on very strong and at first I told him I wasn’t interested and that he could not handle me as a woman. This made him push even harder for me, he told me I wasn’t getting away that easy and that he liked a challenged. I loved the chase of it.
I’ve had a very negative history in relationships, mostly of men betraying me, lying to me, cheating on me, leaving out of nowhere and not communicating. Over time I learned that to trust a person it takes time and patience and that it is not a good idea for me to put my trust into someone 100% at the beginning of the relationship.
Josh and I talked personally about our past relationships, our sexual preferences and before we both knew it we were constantly on each other’s minds. He told me he likes to move quickly in relationships, that he often is the first one to say ‘I love you’, that he has given his heart on a silver platter to so many girls who took him for granted. He lamented over the fact that all he wanted was a woman who felt the same about him as he did for them. I listened carefully to this.
I also tend to wear my heart on my sleeve and I surrendered mostly to the relationship. We talked everyday on a public chat program called Vent that we use to communicate while gaming. He would tell me how he didn’t want to talk to anyone else other than me, and he showed many signs of jealousy because me being a female playing a video game meant a lot of guys trying to get my attention. I was always polite with these people but the only one I really gave my attention to was him. I made him my king and he knew it, I even convinced the admin of the vent server to give me my own channel with a password so that him and I could get our private moments whenever we wanted. Needless to say we spent a lot of time in there alone connecting.
As the relationship went on, I learned that he wasn’t as communicative with his love verbally. At times I grew insecure that he was pulling away and didn’t feel the same, however because he told me this is not how he communicates I understood this. It had a price however. Knowing he couldn’t give me that verbal affirmation of love, my way of dealing with the insecurity was to distance myself and deal with it on my own. He didn’t like this at all. He told me he wanted me to go to him whenever I felt sad or upset, that he wanted to be there for me 100%. I told him this was wonderful but that I sometimes needed my space to think things through so that I didn’t blame him or hold him responsible for my emotions. This happened a few more times and he increasingly became offended that I would just go away and take my space (sometimes without announcing I was doing so). I am highly sensitive like him and have my icing out spells. This drove him crazy and he would lecture me instead of support me. He took it personally and felt that I didn’t trust him to be there for me. That was the truth. We both agreed our best method of communication is through touch in person, not words, and so for me without this established trust through touch, I am wary and cautious. I would doubt whether our relationship would work and doubt whether he was just bullshitting me telling me what I wanted to hear. When he would get upset about me going away, this would often dispel my desire to go deal with my issues and I would instead turn to comfort him. Not a healthy move for me, which drained me continuously. I told him to wait until we could meet in person and that I would be alright we just needed to be understanding of each other. He admitted that sometimes he just needs to give me space and agreed that things were ok.
The distance was hard for us I can tell but I was willing to work past this. He had said once to me that if we want to be together nothing will get in the way of that and that he creates emotional bonds that are very hard to break. No matter how tough things got between us I always came back to talk things out and always reassured him that I was here to be with him.
THEN. One night I had spent the evening with some people I was not fond of, and being an introverted person, I like at the very end of the evening to spend quiet time with just one person to cool down, this is important for me. He had been out all evening at a movie premiere with friends, and when he came home I immediately asked him if he wanted to go chat alone for awhile otherwise I was thinking of just going to bed. He was very distant and said he would rather if I would talk with our friends on vent. I went quiet and got suspicious wondering what had changed for him to do a 180 on me. I was exhausted from the evening and started to get upset so I asked a mutual friend of ours that was there at the time to talk to me privately. I was upset about what happened with Josh and didn’t want to take it out on him so I talked with my friend Scott instead. I needed to get it out and with Josh drunk I wasn’t going to put those emotions on him. The next day, Josh ices me out, so of course I ask him what is going on (not having much knowledge about scorpios at this point). He tells me he doesn’t want to talk to me right now and that we’ll talk later in the day. So I give him his space for 5 hours, wondering what the hell is going on. I finally ask him ‘hey how are you doing’ and he responds with ‘not much I am just about to go out to a movie with some friends’. I told him that I wanted to talk things out and find out what was bothering him and that him going out while I was left in the dark was not cool. I KNOW I KNOW BIG MISTAKE. He definitely felt attacked, told me that he didn’t want to talk because he was nearly ‘done’ with me. I said ‘ok I’m sorry for being upset when you’re ready to talk about it I am here’.
A month goes by and during this time I give him space, though at the same time I send him messages here and there telling him I love him and reassuring him that I am here through thick and thin with him, trying to show my loyalty and devotion as best as I can without physically showing him like I would have liked. Then the head games continued. He not only iced me out but did little things here and there to try to piss me off, like bringing up subjects he knew I might have a strong opinion about, showing attention to other people while ignoring me, giving me curt emotionless and sometimes even outright offensive answers to questions I had about the video game we were playing. He was generally ice cold with daggers. It was like he wanted me to feel the pain he felt when I went away and that whatever pain I caused him he wanted me to feel it a ten-fold. I felt punished continuously and still I remained loyal, bit my tongue, and stayed understanding of his dark side.
Yesterday, I wrote him a letter telling him that I loved him very much but that I needed to go away to focus on myself and improve these parts of me so that I can be the best me for him and myself. I also told him that I knew he was playing head games with me, and that being cold was his way of detaching his emotions and hiding how he truly feels for me, which I know is his love. I told him I wanted to meet up in February when I am heading back home from seeing family and that I would like to establish trust in person instead of the constant confusion and games online. I said I’m not here to be a toy, I’m a woman and am here to develop a meaningful relationship with him. I said that I have my limits and that if he didn’t meet me at the airport that I would move on.
Weeks of sending him loving messages and he says nothing, but as soon as I mention not wanting to play his painful head games he immediately responds with:
We’re not on the same page. I had no idea you still had feelings for me, otherwise I would have said this earlier. I haven’t been hiding my emotions at all, I’ve just cut you off from my emotions and detached and now feel nothing for you. You should know once a scorpio cuts you off there is no going back.
I asked to speak to him on vent so today we went into a channel alone and I said ok is this over? He says he just doesn’t have any feelings anymore, in a very cold curt tone. I asked him why and what had happened and he said when I ‘attacked’ him about going to the movies that he asked himself why he went from feeling upset to feeling angry. That from that point on it was down hill for him. I said this is confusing for me because in the beginning he told me that if a relationship ends for him then he doesn’t want to be around that girl anymore not even as friends. I said so why did you stick around and he says ‘because I didn’t have feelings anymore for you so I am able to be around you’. I said I didn’t know yet how I felt about being around him and that I would have to think about it. I didn’t lose my cool, I stayed calm and was just myself.
I am angry, hurt, feel betrayed, feel lied to, blah blah blah blah. And still I love him and think that all of this is just another test he’s putting me through. But I do not want to fool myself and I have enough respect for myself that I am not going to pine after a guy who isn’t putting in the effort.
Help me understand this please, I want to move on but at the same time I want to tell him that I see through his lies. If I go away and say nothing now without calling him out on his stuff, he certainly has the upper hand. If I call him out on it, he will feel diminuitive and I love him I don’t want to make him feel belittled. I only want to show him support but I am not a pushover at the same time I am human like anyone else and have my limits and my respect.
I’m not sure what I’m asking for, maybe clarification, maybe advice. Do I wait it out? Do I let him know I am not buying his little game? Do I take him seriously when he says he feels nothing? Scorpios excite me and I feel like I am a healthy balance for one. Help me learn how to deal with this please
Help.
Hello there Katsu,
“I haven’t been hiding my emotions at all, I’ve just cut you off from my emotions and detached and now feel nothing for you. You should know once a scorpio cuts you off there is no going back.”
If you know sincerity, then you can detect the lie.
If you know powerlessness, then you understand true power.
If you know humiliation, then you would know true respect for yourself.
Please learn to stop saying empty words in which you have no true understanding of what it truly means. And don´t ask for help when your “I am in control” mechanisms are working overtime. None of the concepts you are currently using to define as your feelings make it past the gates and can be seen in their world. Its not your fault. For scorpio, if they feel that a woman has feelings for them, they know. Not many are capable of having any at all, that make it worth the while to investigate.
Katsu, you are an emotionally violent person, hence a very negative history and men ‘leaving out of nowhere’. It keeps repeating, and who is one constant in all that? You.
Becoming distant is exactly about holding him responsible for your emotions, you seem to believe this as manifestation of you exhibiting great control over yourself.. that’s not maturity. Emotional maturity is not about reactions in the opposite direction. What was it you said?…angry, hurt, betrayed, lied to? It’s about learning what they mean, and what they teach you about – you. Not him.
You need to have an honest look at yourself.
Hello Ines,
I won´t be quiet about this.
With regards to being emotionally violent and not talking specifically about Katsu, you have to be careful in saying this to a “comfy” beauty queen cat. Its the acting portion of leonine psychology, when not fully understanding the depth of what this means.
It also is an indication of a lack of empathy IF her reality is not bathed in violence from others or she is not in any REAL danger.
Its what I have been trying to say about vulnerability. What the hell makes you feel that you are not vulnerable socially? What a bloody illusion. LoL..what game are you not going to play into? The one you don´t know about? Dark hidden social scorpionic intentions of the collective? One scorpio won´t make a dent and is absolutely harmless if you acutely feel that other energy. Strange how we blissfully DO NOT mention how society destroyed us long before “a scorpio” came into our lives.
Violence is an energy that evolves collectively. You are a player on various levels, unless you are battling it.
If we can´t understand this between eachother and have true knowledge who are our real enemies and what battles to fight, then I guess its easy to see why fear makes us good servants. You can try to understand yourself until the cows come home. But understanding “violence” is something outside ourselves and functions as an evolving energy too. It means that we will have to GO outside ourselves and in particular for hardcore leo energy, thats a bit hard to do. Violence, is in the domain of scorpio among other signs. So…what are you trying to say to her?
Cats can not be “diagnosed” as being REALLY emotionally violent just because guys leave her. Hope she wasn´t too honest – guys leave because of that too. We are all rather intense inside, even if it is a mess. Its easy to take out her words and almost use them against her, and just say “hey…its you.”. My guess is that its not all 100% her, but the society we live in. From her comments, Mr. Scorpio uses his astrological sign to justify “excluding a person out of his life”. From that sentence, can we infer what a fucked up bastard he is? That´s an abuse of an ideology.
Dear Gatubela, you are overanalyzing here.
When I read Katsu’s story, something within me found how it played out – too familiar.. so I looked. If she was born in the eastern hemisphere, she is Pisces Moon. I recognise that energy when I see it. Manipulation, mistrust, insecurity, inner doubt equals emotional violence, towards self and, by extention, towards another. I was THAT WOMAN.
If she was born in the Western hemisphere, then her Moon is Aries. But I didn’t feel any Aries there.
I felt it had nothing to do with her Leo sun. Leo would be more of ‘He won’t have an upper hand’, ‘have my limits’, ‘I have respect for myself’ etc. etc… correct me if I’m wrong on that one. Besides.. We are ALL energies within, with the right trigger I could ‘out-Leo’ any Leo, and perhaps, you could feel a bittersweet taste of Eternity, as any Piscean does throughout life.
Nothing in human world evolves on its own, so it’s collective, yes. I make allowances for the fact that people come in here with very little, Gatubela. Simple and accessible to others, after all, not everyone is like myself, a dog with a bone to nurse to death. which is demonstrated by the fact that not many come back to respond. They have to go within – first. Maybe from that point on conditioned responses to collectively generated energies will become seen too. The same goes for feeling pathetic. Women do, it’s a fact that needs to be recognised, before exploring why and what it means.
Those are my reasons.
If a man leaves because a woman is too honest – he is not worth it, not for me, end of story. I was told by him ‘I’ve never met anyone as open as you are’. At some point he even said ‘I wish I could be like that’, but I feel he should be as is, and I appreciate him as he is.
He had really bad news. I came over, he asked.. it’s a blow of massive proportions which will irreversibly alter the course of his life.. the STRENGTH of him.. fuck, I’m just devastated for him. He needs all the support he can get now. Love energy is pure in its intent, always flows out towards the person, not away.. there are no words to describe it. There is nothing in it to want for self, nothing at all. The first time I felt the non grasping, free quality to it – it sent me off spinning.. like I was lifted upwards. So much NOT what the world calls ‘love’, and how the world is fucking suffocating without the real thing, an unconscious self mutilation on a global scale.
Well…again, you are tweaking the comfort zones. Most of us try to avoid the “bad” about a person and in ourselves. We forget that if we don´t deal with it, then it will always be there, subconsciously. If a woman understands IN HER, the sacredness of sex, then simply, this perception of pathetic would not exist.
She would instead be in tune to a man´s true intent to love her…or make love to her. Scorpio won´t mind her intent to be “TRULY KISSED” and have a true sexual bond however amusing it may be. No cheapness there and a completely different story.
Mr. Scorpio in her post, is in the wonderful position to CHOOSE. No emotional intensity and desire nature. Does she still exist for him? His choice was to not continue with the relationship.
She did not work on her own desire nature and insecurities. Therefore, she is not in any position other than to make choices based on insecurity and fear.
Scorpio will bring up all the illusions we have about sex and relationships. Women just don´t understand that this “judgement” is beyond themselves and actually, in death, it is even beyond Mr. Scorpio. She will not have the receptivity to know the will of the universe and the TRUTH of her own insecurities. Which many times, are illusions. And other times, conditions will be placed.
Its because Women usually polarize the relationship with love energy with no real intent in trying to meet their partner´s energy and honour his sexuality. While Scorpio usually are experts at dealing with women´s insecurities – which most of the time, don´t even reach their souls. I mean…lol…our abysses, which are traumatic for us at our age, do not usually come close to their own emotional intensity or life experiences that they had before becoming an adult.
Which is why I felt strongly about your own “leave it to the universe” comment. That actually is invoking judgement and not “love” energies.
The Abyss… what can I say, Gatubela? The detachment proved so complete.. I seem to have lost that thingy which desperately tries to attach to anything or anyone.
I don’t perceive anything in terms of good or bad… stress is stitched into this way of being. Am pulling a rabbit out of a hat, move countries at three weeks notice, last minute dot com trick. Things just come to me, action arises as a response to that. There is no desire to prove anything, and no feeling of ‘importance’.. So How can I relate to female frustrations when I stopped feeling any, be it relationships or life events? I hardly experience a yucky feeling inside, the highs and lows are gone. No feeling lasts, passes like clouds.. and I don’t expect anything to be a certain way. I don’t have doubts or think about anything long and hard.
People have emotional IQs of a toddler in a supermarket, splitting the world as either dark or light. Scorpio men are known for that especially. It’s alient to me, always has been and will be. The world is neither, it’s ambiguous and formless, and our little spark of time here is the seed of Timelessness.
I seem to have lost an ability to feel romantic love.. An affectionate friendship with an equal who wears the cloak of Eternity every day, as do I, TASTES it in his mouth with the same intensity and knowing – is what I want. ‘Want’ isn’t even the word. What I would accept I guess. And you talk about desire nature… oh that place I’m in.. it’s infinite, there is no desire there.. only curiosity.
No ties. Whatever you choose – will always be the right choice. Tao, the natural Force of Life – embraces All. We only have one life.. THIS one.
Great for you Ines.
I feel feminine frustrations intensely… Sexual desire, moodiness, PMS…nervousness, shyness, depression… those are the soft ones. I know me, and I have to hold out until I am in touch with the truth in me first. Its like my heart (heaven) and hell have to have the same message. It hurts like hell and it is a lot of suffering, heaven to hell but at the end, the universe kindly lets me know my own ego. Its the truth beyond me. I literally battle with the universe to earn “REAL” through love.
It won´t be anything society says it is. And I won´t care what anyone says after I know it.
Scorpio – the energy – are not the ones living their lives passively Ines. Its like you don´t understand “violence” once again. Its always “the stupid one” who sees black and white and perceives the vulnerable..the helpless…and attempts something even more “stupid” – they try to do something about it. In its pure form, these conflicts lead the scorpion to the phoenix. True rebirth is done in truth and not in illusion. The will of the universe will be shown to you – and that is if you have bloody earned it. Its not an energy for the spineless life lovers.
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‘Life lovers’ is contradictory to the nature of being, an Ego defined constract. Does a lion or a tree ‘love life’? I don’t love life. I AM life. There is nothing spineless/passive about being Life. This comment comes from a subconscious idea of a monk sitting atop the hill and ‘loving life’. It ain’t real.
I’ve known your suffering for a long time, Gatubela. Remember my poem.. we all are/have been damaged in some way by the mere fact of living a human life. I’ve known all those things you mention – first hand. But Universe views bacteria as vital to its creative force as any human. A little bit of humility in seeing that, in looking at the night sky – and the human angst goes out the window.
True sexual arousal is spontaneous and directionless. Sexual desire, on the other hand, is mental in origin. We often THINK our way into desiring someone. Nothing wrong with that, except it creates complicated pictures people weave around the object of their desire, fantasies which often have nothing to do with reality.
A Scorpio man doesn’t withdraw in times of crisis, not if he fully trusts you. It’s the opposite, that’s what I know now. I have someone who’s started the incineration process.. I feel his pain intensely, but can’t allow myself to enter his abyss. He needs a lifeboat, not someone to drown with him. he certainly has the capacity to fly.. and knows we met for a reason. Perhaps, that was the reason.
Why do you use the word ‘violence’ when talking about drive for justice? I don’t understand you.
Great for me… don’t know, Gatubela. Every state of being has a price.
Dear ALL,
I will be changing the web address and website for this blog in the coming week.
The new web address will be linked through http://www.craigsutters.com
Thanks,
Craig
Hello Ines,
No, the comment did not come from the idea of a monk sitting on a hill. Most oriental monks were warriors so believe me when I say my subconscious does not view that a monk on a hill is doing anything related to life by the way. You would have to be studying oriental marshal arts philosophy and techniques in order to comprehend this. The energy is never passive due to the fact that there is a purpose and a tangible result expected.
The Tao is very much misunderstood by people who are not oriental or have not grown up in an oriental culture. It is one of the 3 pillars of Chinese culture. Actually, 100% spiritual and the idea is liberation or illumination. Very similar to the goal of hindus as well. Its interesting that the Tao requires “a being energy” and “a not being energy”. One MUST BE, and the other MUST NOT BE. The NOT BEING energy is the Creative SOURCE.
So, embracing is the wrong concept here. One is only the result of the other.
The Tao does not embrace all. It does not embrace violence and materialism. Your example about bacteria and relating it to humility is strange for me. Bacteria are not harmful really, as their life energy would be to live and not kill their host. Its either symbiosis or death.
Justice according to the TAO, is going away from the TAO. And everything you do, if not facing your destiny, will result in failure and more bad stuff. And you will only bring disgrace and destruction to others. So, an enlightened man knows and faces his destiny. A master may choose it. LoL. Doing this assures “eternity” and that no harm will come to him. I have to laugh that these philosophies were not actually directed to women.
How living the TAO assures that you will not be harmed is a part of Chinese Mysticism.
Hi Gatubela,
It has nothing to do with bacteria being harmful, or a flower being beautiful, and everything to do with people thinking themselves as the centre of the Universe, with heir petty concerns and value laiden perceptions of life. People are not vital to the existence of this world, contrary to what they believe.. I don’t have any concepts, just live life.
Anything is possible from a place of inner freedom, vision and absence of fear. I’m in Trinco. It’s yet free from shite, everything here is done on an ad hoc basis, organic and full of real treasures, how long will that last before western ‘values’ swallow it whole? I hear the Indian ocean waves speaking day and night of the impermanency of it all. It’s home for now.
Enlightened people do not represent nations which they come from. They only represent their own private search and struggles, and the knowing obtained from that. The Chinese at large do not stand for Confucius, the same as Christians do not stand for Christ. Travel to Southern China, Hongkong, South Korea and see for yourself. Corruption of individual spirit by the lures of ‘easy’ material existence is evident wherever you go.
I’m lucky, Gatubela. On my life travels I meet exceptional people who are not afraid to live out of the mould. Scorpio and Pisces have one thing in common.. they cannot be made to do anything that contradicts their inner feeling. There is a lot to be said for it.
Create your own Arizona, girls, and let a man be part of it…… he’ll want to *grin*
youtube.com/watch?v=P_vJcr3al48
She sure has major issues. Following current mythology and victimization norms, I don´t see why he would grin at her creating her own lies. The guy in the song probably has the evolution of a slug.
As per the song, his lie, was just as strong as her belief in it. If there is no spiritual bond, then the relationship is over before it started because spiritual energy is not about living life, as much as learning to turn away from it. So…I guess he would more than a bloody grin out of it, if she decided to create another lie.
But on a more evolved level, If she delved into her sacred shakti energies in loving him, then she would have had to understand the nature of life and death, creation and destruction. i.e….surrender.
Most men will just shy away when this happens. Its actually kind of funny. Smoldering, burning, energy dripped with major sexiness, standing on her own…not wanting to be controlled, only create.
Oooops…all the men have disappeared. lol Only a man who is in contact with his divine self, might understand “her source” and his “penetration of it”.
Men are important in any creation and masculine energy is always a part of it. Its absolutely vital. What you are explaining is only the determination of your own individuality. But not understanding male energy, beyond your own.
However, surrender means that you did not do it on your own. I can´t explain the reverence I have for this sacred energy.
Most men stand for “destruction” through their shadow energy. It won´t matter how successful they appear. Women, as holders of creative energies, and also having masculine energies, will attempt to take the eternal and infinite Source, and “create” more illusion.
If you don´t have balance, you will have psychosis.
The heart is the key. Love beyond destruction and that darn Shiva energy.
Hi Gatubela! Did you change your email?
I never said ‘create your own lies’. Your dreams are your own. Live them, no need for a knight in shining armour, that fairytale of a princess waiting to be rescued from the tower… Imagination is capable of moving mountains. The difference between imagination and wishful thinking is action that propels forward.
I don’t have a heart, Gatubela.
I was referring to the girl in the song…
She reminded me of my pisces friend. Of all the energies available to her in her piscean soul (infinite) she “landed” and grounded herself on mirroring her scorpion husband´s cheating on her, while battling her strong suicidal tendencies because of the agony she was going through. Incredible pain – I literally saw her crying for days. She lived and manifested the mirror. Why manifest his dark side, and not strive to see “what he did not know about himself”?
Those are the wrong reasons for female creative energies. It can only be love. Giving into pain, agony, loss, because of “not getting what we deeply and profoundly desire and want”, is the wrong reason to manifest creative energies. Its understandable, but the consequences are inevitable. Women will not have the capacity to choose their own spirituality. They choose “life” and not “death”. Surrender is the manifestation of her true essence. That truth, most men get nervous around.
She cries everyday too, but she says it was because she was angry at herself for being so weak. She denies that she might still have strong feelings for her ex husband. Mr. Scorpio, continues to send her emails, etc. and hurting her. Basically rubbing in his great lifestyle, the money he makes, his social life is all over facebook and the feminine comments are very sensual. His photos are of a man, who is fit, attractive to the opposite sex and shows a very good time. LoL…venus in Sag. My ex did the same too. Sag sun sign.
I look to his daughter (the fruit of his seed). On drugs, depressed, a converted lesbian (she now hates men) and lies…and shows antisocial almost autistic behaviors in her own manifestation of her leonine ego.
Do I really need to know more about “them” as ONE?
Why should pisces deny her own feelings, and not accept his rejection of her and her essence? Why did he get her pregnant in the first place? Its because the unconditionality aspect of love is unknown in this planet.
These kinds of chioces, makes it easy for women to see their “nothingness”. Its terrible to know that we did not create any light in ourselves to deal with loss and agony though truth and perseverance.
I wonder what her agony was about. The concept of ‘cheating’ is not something I understand.
The most powerful works of art are born out of personal misery. That’s why I stopped writing lyrics, the fuel is gone LOL. Shocking just how much misery resonates with people on every level of existence. Because the magnitude of the experience may be different, but experiences are the same.
When my son was about three, I looked at him once and said to myself ‘We all screw up our children one way or another. I don’t want to screw up this one’. I feel for the little Leo caught between the two self absorbed people who call themselves adults. And being caught between a Scorpio and a Pisces at war is the worst kind of experience… may need a rehab after.
Fucking animals.
youtube.com/watch?v=RQ9_TKayu9s
Arjuna saw many faces of Krishna on that day… yes. There are many. You don’t have to travel to Asia to understand this simple fact, they are right here in front of you.. the divine terror of seeing what exactly we are comprised of, and the sacrifices to be made.. I live in a community which has a Buddha shrine on every corner, as well as a compulsory mullah singing and the bells of a Christian church. It means NOTHING, and fascination with Eastern tradition is one more delusion of the man made variety.
Feeling Eternity is a form of meditation really.. it gives meaning to everything. A reminder.
I lived in a house that had a buddha in the kitchen…lol.
Asian culture is misunderstood and misused. Doing tai chi is now considered an exercise. So is qi gong. So is yoga. I even saw “naked yoga”. huh? People trying to raise kundalini through “breathing” and connecting to their inner goddess..bla bla bla. No wonder they take their clothes off.
Pisces essence now is just that she wants his money or his “power”. The beauty of pisces just swam out of that relationship. He once told me that he wanted to die as well. Made sense, I guess. She mirrored that as well. Why do they only have access to the lower energies in the male seed?
Pisces is not REALLY meant to be materialistic. And when you really feel it, dreams are still illusions, even if manifested. The idea of “Chasing your dreams” really is a karmic responsibility for future generations and ourselves. How can I dream, manifest, without more lying?
Dreaming…but grounded in truth and the cosmos. So…how does that concept show itself in our physical earth? Well, in most cases, while you don´t know yourself, your dreams will crash under your own illusions. Its desire nature or “what you want”, being hit with “reality” of who you are and the people around you. Being burdened with failure, and nothing ever happening for you, in this karmic scenario, is one of the first illusions you have to break. (depression, sadness, and all of those awful negative emotions). Until you are in truth (union), its all a dream.
I always have the sensation that I can never have anything. IT will all be taken away from me. But I have learned that I can never truly love, if I am attached to anything. Its constant detachment…I have to work on it constantly…in order to understand the best way to not cause harm to my children.
I don´t know of any other way to attempt loving, not cause more lies and impose karma on an innocent soul that still requires a mom…
Can we pass the pisces karma? Not many people understand that pisces must shoulder the karma of others. Christ had to do that as well, as there is NEVER any true understanding of anything unless you learn to truly empathize with their souls. The yin and yang of who we are, through the choices we have manifested, is the key. Compassion is not for the weak willed and spineless.
He cheated on me, so I will cheat on him. But the inner energy is not sexual gratification, or pleasure. It was hurt, low self esteem and pain. She basis her actions on negativity and used a sacred energy to do it. Best that she kept her vagina out of it. And knowing pisces in sex, she involved her soul too because of the merging thingy.
No love there…no love will be manifested. More illusions for pisces.
Sometimes..to correct on tiny little wrong in this world, you realize that it was just the tip of the piscean iceberg in our society, because the manifestation of unevolved scorpionic intent and dark , suppressed subconsciousness is in the realm of piscean illusions.
And hell…if you are a dreamy pisces believing in peace and unity, prepare for death and a murder attempt if you thought you could manifest that world for your children. You have just childishly skipped and swam into a loaded minefield.
For me. Pisces has to learn to say “no” and use all of their fishy ways and cultivate tai chi energy. Its easy to say, “All you have to do is…” but how come no one says “This is how you can strive to do it…”? This use of this kind of “chi” can be cultivated, to protect and evade, instead of attack and destroy.
As soon as pisces decides to use their energy for aggression in battle, devolved mirroring and heartless, souless sensuality, then it changes them into being the biggest walking illusion around. Cosmic fire is something pisces has access too…and it is even understandable for them too.
So…lol…I can imagine why my piscean friend´s soul cries as her own karma stares at her in the face, through the eyes of her daughter.
Women are bonded to the fruits of their chaotic union with Shivic forces. Do they assume their responsibility? Not really… because they don´t know truth and can not perceive the suffering of their children´s souls as if it were their own.
My piscean friend´s daughter should have a voodoo doll. Everytime her soul hurts, mom should feel it too.
I only write a fraction of my responses here LOL.
Funny you should say he mentioned he wanted to die.. because I felt he hasn’t let her go, not really. And Scorpios mirror too. Suicidal tendencies are more Piscean in origin. He picked it up from her, Scorpio are much more attached to life to seriously wallow in this kind of feeling.
Your friend doesn’t want his power or money, no matter what you might be seeing… she wants his ability to create what she needs – for herself. She wants freedom…. this is an ultimate Piscean dream… freedom from all constraints, especially those of own emotional jail.
She doesn’t know how to break from that.
Below is a good representation of a Piscean caught in an emotional blackout as devastating as a tsunami. She is Pisces Sun, with a lot of fire thrown in. I infinitely understand what she is trying to express in this video, from my own past experiences. You can’t say ‘no’ to that, not until it changed you from inside out.
youtube.com/watch?v=b-3BI9AspYc
No. No shouldering of anyone’s karma, it just feels plain wrong and mind generated.
No one understands the nature of Piscean energy. Heartless souless sensuality doesn’t exist in a Piscean world, It’s the energy of MOMENTUM.NOW. Momentum, Gatubela, like nature’s tides… a Piscean lives life just like that, he eats when he wants to eat, sleeps when he wants to sleep, fucks when he wants to fuck and hunts when ihe wants to hunt. He takes when there is a need to take,,, and gives when there is a need to give. It’s THE ENERGY OF NATURE ITSELF. There are no timestables set, it’s driven by the internal clock (funny, I am known for always getting the time spot on without looking at the clock), by the internal NEED (ALL have needs, start with food, take it from there)… it’s the most animalistic energy in its pure form that can be in a human. I FEEL an animal. I AM AN ANIMAL.
A Piscean famous analytical minds (we ALL known for that, no need to be Einstein, he was that Piscean who understood the nature of things) is a float, a fucking float to help them navigate THE HIMAN WORLD, the man made one which no fish belongs to. No human belongs in that mind structured world, get it? A Piscean Higher Consciousness comes to terms wiTH THAT, the fact of being thrust into the psychology of Mind.. I AM NOT MY MIND!!!
And Gatubela.. forget about love and heart, move beyond that. The Lioness doesn’t have a heart. Love IS BEING. Not thinking about it and setting yourself moral targets, not taking decisions to be ‘better’ or ‘more soulful’… as if you are already not enough. You are way off here. I love you, Gatubela, but I’m also fed up with you. You think, think, think, analyse, give it convenstions, rules, how it’s supposed to be, stop analysing!!! Allow yourself to dissolve into being, without thinking how it’s supposed to be, without ‘karma’, without the human torturous deliberations on this and that… it’s bloody exhausting!!!
Just pay attention to the scenes of these two together. This is not an act. The emotional chemistry is very real here. Many songs the guy wrote after are littered with references to her, the same way as she does in the video I posted earlier. Oh, she did wack him with the pillow too…
“I have love for her” and then “I fucked you once” and then “we are coming home” and then “I don’t do do overs” and then doing the do over, just keeps going, with both dropping “the one” in their songs, yet… He said he never feels small and intimidated by women, but she made him feel like he was 17.. “”I was a pawn… You know what
she was doing to me? She was doing exactly what I’ve done to so many women throughout my life, which is show them quality time, then disappear. I was like, wow, this feels terrible.” I bet she felt EXACTLY the same.
So what happened? They don’t play games with each other, the Fish and the Scorp.. impossible when they see through one another.. they just fucking run and cause damage in the process. Both. The intimidation comes from feeling the invasion of an (alien) emotional energy of such propotions that the two people in this ‘normal’ environment don’t know how to deal with that.. feels like a loss of freedom, it’s that obliterating between Pisces and Scorpio, he is Scorpio of course. It is NEVER JUST A FLING.
“But I was curious, and I’ll never forget it, baby, what an experience/You could’ve been the one, but it wasn’t that serious.” he sang in another song..Huh?? Not serious? Just bloody wake up. Going on for years.. feeding the songs with this ongoing conversation. They may move on eventually, but it will always linger. It made me smile.. what an experience… indeed.
Scorpio guys are EASY to love, so easy… To every Piscean girl out there… treasure him. It’s the only kind of love that you understand, and he is the only kind of guy who will ‘get’ you. the kind envied and admired by those who see it, IF you make it through to the real thing. Please please do. This connection is eternal. Give him all the kindness you have within, he is not difficult!! He is very very special, there is no other like him.
Your love can create wonders.
youtube.com/watch?v=-zzP29emgpg
And on Piscean energy… it’s considered a sign of an old man, of coming into Death.. In a way. But it’s more of a pre-birth state, of that point between Life and Death where we enter into infinite, yet unknown possibilities. A CANVAS, a blank state onto which every other energy is superimposed, and so we have to learn about
bravely exploring the world we are born into – like Aries, and to realise the tangible nature of it – like Taurus, to communicate with it – like Gemini etc. etc., we start the journey in the childhood and learn to use all those to make life (us) go on. That’s why a Piscean identifies with EVERY energy combination available. All colours of rainbow which, in him and to him, are one Light.
Pisceans have many (psychological) identities… the Now dictates it, the moment will tell you which one. The mutability of it is the mutability of nature, the nature changes with seasons, it RESPONDS to the demand, you wouldn’t plant wheat in December, would you?
Pisceans don’t need to learn to say ‘no’, it’s just a tiny, Earth bound aspect of Existence. They need to SEE their own nature, that of EXPERSSION of ALL ENERGIES, which gives them immense personal power. Stop thinking (!) yourself as powerless and lost in this world. We have the tools at our disposal that others can only dream of. So learn to listen to every situation and what arises within you – and respond appropriately.
No wonder fixed signs find it perplexing.. a rock is a rock, isn’t it? No, to a Piscean this rock is also a molten lava (its birth) and sand (its ultimate death). Try to fucking explain it to anyone… it’s hopeless, so we just keep silent. BUT.. I’m Gemini Rising. I don’t ‘chat’ that much in life, but when I do… it’s the Piped Pier effect. It takes me five minutes to talk to a stranger – and they are mine. They’ve been seduced into feeling a sense of belonging they haven’t known before. It sounds superficial, but it’s not, because I go for the core of them. It’s not a grand plan, but a natural ability. As a result, people sometimes offer me things.. money, their companionship, time, their home.. just because I made them feel human. REAL. And guess what.. I DON’T NEED ANY OF IT. From anyone. That also confuses people, they WANT to be part of the fairytale, to carry on ‘belonging’. Just stop there. Do it for yourself please. Piscean energy has severity at its core, this comes from seeing the Absolute.. and Life kills the weak, always. A Fish knows deep inside that he, too, is dead meat without relying on own faculties.
People forget about things, events, ‘stuff’.. they never forget how you made them feel.
Oh.. the video was of Drake ‘Take Care’.
Take care.
Scorpio guys
Sounds bad huh, have you checked your synastry? Just hope that your pluto is aspecting his venus, you be the pluto person, he can never play your mind, good luck, girls!
The article here is originally written by the most popular Astrologer Linda Goodman… She have a Book you can check that out.. her books were called Sun Signs and Love Signs by Linda Goodman… very very good.. of all the books I read about astrology she have the best one.
I still think aries is great sign no matter how much people are hating on us.